#(Ain’t no way someone actually did this💀💀💀)

[mira-of-marvel]

hey Mira. I didn’t think you’d be on here

— @barnes-jamesbuchanan-official

oh—hey James- that’s funny I’d say the same for you. But apparently there are plenty of you on here anyway so I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. How are you?

[bisexualiteaa]

actually dying for a cooper howard x vaultie!reader smut where they have some slow burn longing steaminess, but coop thinks she’s too good for him UNTIL she comes in contact with a sex pollen-esque chem and he finally gives in to save her 🥵 please work your magic and elaborate however you want

A Flame in Your Heart

Cooper Howard x Fem Reader (SMUT!!)

CW: NSFW like absolutely filthy y’all, you’ve been warned. 💀 unprotected sex, irradiated cream pie, p in v, p0rn w/ plot, slow burn, flirting, cursing, perverted thoughts, dub-con (because of chem usage though consent is asked and given!) rough sex, dirty talk, choking, praise kink, degradation, squirting, mention of fingering, FEELINGS!! Slight deviation from TV series, possible grammar/spelling mistakes, cooper starts off mean but slowly warms up to reader

AN: I absolutely LOVED this request! I was up all night writing down all my ideas and spent all this morning perfecting it, and this has to be my longest one yet! I thank you for your patience anon and my lovely readers as I finally post this! Hope you enjoy and that I have done your ask justice! ❤️

Life outside of the vault was difficult to say the least. You felt hunger and dehydration in ways you’d never experienced before, going out of your way to do desperate things you would normally never do in order to get said food and water. The heat was unbearable, every stretch of land you walked across had a danger lurking around every corner, and worst of all, you’d never felt so alone. You weren’t sure what it was about you, maybe it was because you were new to the surface, maybe it was your nearly perfect skin, but everyone seemed to stare or glare at you when you would walk through. It wasn’t until you’d passed through Filly, meeting Ma June that you realized people didn’t take kindly to people like you. “Vaulties” she called them, an audible disdain in her tone, making you look down to remember you were in your blue and gold Vault-Tec suit. “I’ll be going then, have a nice day!” You said skiddishly, offering her a kind smile before turning and exiting the shop. You just wanted to make friends, why was that so hard up here? So when your eyes set on a man clad in classic Wild West cowboy clothes, watching smoke settle after a stand off, you weren’t sure why but you knew that was who you needed on your side in this world. Before you knew it, your feet were already moving and mouth speaking to him, grabbing his attention.

“I ain’t no charity case sweetheart, I don’t take on strays” The ghoul spoke, his southern drawl making him even more memorable than the marred texture of his skin. You looked to the dog that trailed not far behind him as he walked, changing its pace to keep up with the man. “The dog there with you tells me otherwise” you quipped. “Ain’t my dog” he responded harshly as he continued walking. “I can make it worth your while!” You yelled, making him stop in his tracks for a moment, a scary sight at first before you worked up the nerve to come closer once he turned back to you. “And how you suppose you’d do that?” He asked, and at first you didn’t know what to say, the words leaving your mouth before you could really think of a good enough reason. Did nobody like company anymore these days? “Well…I can be your scavenger! Pretty good at collecting stuff” you offered, shaking your bag and making things rattle around inside to prove it, making him give a huff of a chuckle. “‘f I wanted a pack mule I’d‘ve found a brahman” he shot you down. “Okay, then I can be good company to talk to!” You offered. “They make radios for when I want to listen to someone yack” he shut down once again. “I’m a good cook! Even with shitty supplies, I can make a stew that’d put a smile even on the meanest son of a gun’s face” you said, hopeful that he’d at least take you for something, but you had a feeling he’d probably turn you down again. “Iguana on a stick’s just fine” he said, though he had to admit the stew sounded good. Reminded him of home before all this wasteland bullshit. “Oh, umm…” you said awkwardly, your tone growing quiet and my how it put a sad look in your eyes. The evil part of him liked it, seeing your sweet innocent face all downturned but the part that was still human deep down, the part that hardly ever saw the light of day anymore, had half a mind to let you.

“Got a lotta nerve walkin’ up t’ me, girly. If you somehow been lucky enough that you ain’t met dangerous yet, you’re lookin’ at someone who could put you down before you’d even mutter your last words” he threatened, motioning to the double barreled shotgun in his hands. “I know, I saw it first hand. You hold yourself well, I envy that. I’m new to all of this and just really want someone who can help me hold my own the same way” you explained. “Look, I know I don’t look like much but please just give me a chance” you begged, looking up at him with a fighting spirit in your eyes that he had to admit, he was pretty impressed in seeing in a vaultie. “You help me, I help you, however that ends up being” you offered, standing strong on this and damn if he didn’t see a little bit of himself in you at that. He gave a sigh, tilting his head down before shaking it, not believing himself for the words he was about to say. “Alright, but the minute you start draggin’ you’re out, got me?” He said, and he hated the way his cold heart seemed to pump a little faster upon seeing your eyes light up with joy and a smile stretch to your face. “Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!” You said, opening your arms up to hug him but being met with the barrel of his gun poking your stomach to keep space between you. “I don’t do hugs” he spoke gruffly, making you back up enough to where he’d drop the gun back to his side. “R-Right…sorry” you apologized, embarrassment washing over you but still glad to finally have someone in your company. “C’mon, I ain’t got all day now” he said, motioning you to start walking, so you joined him.

Your travels with him certainly weren’t at all what you were expecting them to be. From being used as bait, to being tied up with rope most of the time you’d traveled together, or being sent in as his scavenger, you weren’t prepared for a lot of the reality you faced with being up on the surface. Most nights made you question why you’d ever left the comfort of the vault, why you’d abandoned a trusty food supply, regulated temperatures, a safe place to sleep that wasn’t riddled with radroaches or had the likely hood of waking up to a raider with a knife at your throat for no reason. Then you would remember the experiment in your vault, why you left that awful place for arguably a worse reality on the surface but at least you had freedom. Out here you were free to say what you want, do what you want, consume what you want so long as you could defend yourself incase that supply wasn’t unclaimed. You’d gotten pretty handy with a gun in the most recent weeks. Cooper, you learned one night was his name, using empty glass bottles as targets to help teach you accuracy and how to hit things from a longer range. In exchange, you came a little more useful than he had first thought. You had some useful stuff on you for trade like chems, ammo and food, were a good extra bag to hold stuff in, and you were a better cook than you’d talked about. Sure you had a tendency to talk too much, and you weren’t great with a gun, but you were getting there.

“Might I suggest takin’ them clothes instead of wearin’ that suit?” He said, making you look at him weird for suggesting you strip a dead raider of their clothes. “Why would I do that…?” You asked, genuinely confused and not sure what he was implying either, he was a hard man to predict. “Because, people see that shit and get real mad. People up here don’t like vaulties or the ones that run ‘em” he said and it made sense, it helped you understand why you kept getting evil glares each time someone would look at you or talk to you. You figured he knew best, so you took the shirt and pants from one of the female raiders, tucking them into your bag to change into at a better time. He gave a chuckle watching you do so, apologizing to the dead body profusely as you took their clothes and whatever valuables they had on them for the betterment of your own survival. You were still so naive, part of him was hoping he could slowly start to break and corrupt your way of thinking, but that was a thought for another time.

Before you knew it, night finally began to fall. The sun setting across the horizon gave the air less of a hot, harsh bite as the temperature began to cool rapidly across the sands of the Mojave. All you managed to grab was a pair of beat up, old jeans and a tank top, so as soon as the sun set, the chill set in. As you both set up camp for the night just outside of an abandoned rest stop, you started a fire to cook some of that stew you talked about being good at. He had to admit, it was pretty damn good, likely the best thing he’s had since before the bombs went off. Though even the kindling fire couldn’t manage to chase the chill away, watching you run your hands up and down your arms to try and warm up some by it. He felt a slight pang in his heart, watching you shiver like that, how your eyes lit up by the blaze of the fire and your hair seemed to be tousled just right. You were pretty, too pretty to be trekking this wasteland, and certainly too pretty to be trekking it with him of all people as your company. Even he had a heart still, as cold as it was, so out of kindness he shrugged his duster from his shoulders, draping it around you. You looked at the fabric pooled around you, pulling it over you better before looking to him as he sat down across from you again. “Ain’t no use if the cold gets ya” he said, making you smile appreciatively at him as you realized what he did. “Thank you” you replied, a slight blush fanning to your cheeks as the chattering of your teeth finally died down and you grew warmer. It smelled like him, sure it had splatters of old dried blood and was rather worn, but it had that gunpowder and smoke smell to it that you associated with him. “Don’t say I never did nothin’ for ya” he replied, trying to sound cold but it didn’t come off that way, making you chuckle. “What do I owe you?” You asked, making him fall silent for a moment as he pondered the answer to your question. He looked you over for a second before tipping his hat down to cover his face a bit, the signal that he was about to try and get some sleep. “Just keep watch for a bit, I’ll be up in a few hours” he responded, and while it wasn’t what you were expecting, you’d take it.

He was startled awake a couple hours later when he heard a commotion, you yelling at someone telling them to back off that this place had been claimed. The raider you were up against didn’t seem to like that very much, claiming that wasn’t how it worked up here. The altercation took a turn for the worst when the man reached for his gun but you were quick to fire and kill him before he could let out a shot. A shaky feeling set in your hands and a horrified expression across your face at the realization that you just killed someone. Cooper, who was certainly wide awake now, was rather impressed by your quick timing and precision, coming up behind you to lay a gloved hand to your shoulder. “Well would ya look at that, looks like them lessons been payin’ off after all. How’s it feel?” He asked, looking down at you as you stared at the gun in your hands. “He was yelling at me but…he was aiming at you. I don’t really know what came over me, I didn’t like that he was going to shoot you so I just…I killed him” you said, recounting the encounter to him as if he hadn’t seen it himself. He didn’t really know what to think in that moment as you explained how your mind worked, he was proud for sure at your show of improvement with a gun, yet also touched at the same time. No one ever really looked out for him since he started his bounty hunting, he was a well hated man by many but you defended him without really any reason to. You’d just learned his name not but two weeks ago, and before that he was dragging you around with rope yet you still defended him, had you two really gotten closer in the time that’s passed since? He wasn’t sure, but it was something he could mull over while you were sleeping. “Get some rest vaultie, sun’ll be up soon” he said, knowing you likely wouldn’t get much sleep with the adrenaline still coursing through you, but it was at least worth a try, you two had a long day ahead of you.

When you woke up that next morning, things felt a little different between you two. You weren’t some annoying little dog following him anymore, you were an equal. He no longer looked at you and treated you like you were lower than him as you both set out across the wastelands, he had respect for you. Hell, he even started talking with you now when you were out traveling which was almost unbelievable. You learned through those conversations that he used to be an actor in Wild West themed films, explaining his outfit, and that he was married before the bombs dropped. You of course told him bits and pieces about yourself in exchange, after all it only felt fair but it was also nice to just finally talk to someone after all this time.

When night time fell again you two sat enjoying a meal by the fire together, only rather than across from each other, he sat next to you, making a blush come to your face as you’d smiled sweetly at him. “Glad to know I don’t have germs anymore” you said jokingly, making him chuckle. “Give an old man some credit. It ain’t exactly all peaches and marmalade out here darlin’, even cute can be deadly” he said, the nickname and him calling you cute sending a deeper blush to your cheeks despite knowing it’s just how he spoke. Whether it was the lack of contact with other people for so long, or just his charm you couldn’t quite tell, but it always seemed to have an effect on you. “Just teasin’ you, I get it. I’d tie me up and use me for bait too if I’d been doing this as long as you have. It’s a shit hole out here” you said, making him look at you as you dropped the first curse word he’s ever heard from you. “Well I’ll be damned, either I’m a bad influence or you’re finally growin’ outta that naive shell there, vaultie” Cooper replied, making you laugh as you saw a smirk stretch to his thin, marred lips, the first one you’d seen in a while that wasn’t brought on by drugs, chems or that first sip of a good bottle of alcohol. “Probably both” you quipped, making him chuckle. “Yeah, probably. Been told I ain’t easy to stomach” he said, making you hum. “You’re alright in my book, Coop” you replied with a sweet, genuine smile that matched your tone and was that butterflies you felt in your stomach? Did you just call him Coop? No ones called him that in ages, why did it make his heart start to flutter a bit? “You ain’t so bad yourself, vaultie” he responded, still affording you that small smile before turning back to his food. “Keep making food this good and I just might have to keep you around” he joked, making you giggle and break the slightly tense silence. “It’s not much but I certainly try. I’ll definitely make sure to stay good at it, I like traveling with you” you said, unintentionally coming off flirtatious and fuck there it goes again, that feeling in his chest and his stomach like he needed to hit his inhaler but he felt great. What were you doing to him?

“Hey, if it isn’t too much can I ask you a sort of…personal question?” You asked, holding the beat up bowl in your hands as you looked over at him. This was normally the part where he would say no, absolutely not, he wasn’t here to be questioned on his personal matters. Yet, with you, it was different. Ever since last night he hasn’t been so on edge with you, it was like he’d warmed up to you. “Depends on what you’re askin’ there, sweetheart” he said, the nickname once again making you blush. “Do you…miss them? Your wife and daughter?” You asked, not sure if it was a good subject or good question to ask but after finding out, you were genuinely curious. He looked down at his bowl again, thinking of the proper response to your question. The old him would have been defensive, told you it was none of your business, but now? He wasn’t sure. “Ain’t a day that goes by that I don’t think about ‘em. About the way I ran out on ‘em when them bombs dropped” he answered, making you give him a sad look as genuine guilt filled his tone. This was the most honest and open he’s been with you this whole time. “I feel guilty. Not sure if I feel guilty for runnin’ out and leavin’ ‘em behind or guilty for the way I ran out, been tryin’ t’ figure that out for quite a while now and I still ain’t sure” he added, and you sympathized with that. Everyone has regrets, things they’ve done in the past that they aren’t proud of, people up here were no different in that aspect. “Well, in the short time I’ve gotten to know you, I’ve come to understand that everything you do has a valid reason behind it. So even if you feel it was a shitty thing to do, you obviously had a reason for doing so. No one can blame you for trusting your gut, and I don’t think you should blame yourself for doing so” you responded, your hand falling to his as a comforting gesture, your words ringing in his head almost as if you’d opened something in his mind, something he’d never really gave himself to think about before. He looked down at your hand that rested on his, noticing the way you didn’t flinch away from him like others did, the way you were brave enough to walk up to him, talk to him, *trust* him when he made it very clear that you shouldn’t. It was smaller than his, softer for sure, but warm all the same, then he looked up to see that caring look in your eyes and smile on your face that told him that you cared. “Guess you’re right, still wonder sometimes if it was the right choice to make” he replied. “I understand. Everyone has regrets, we all look at the past and hold at least something that we’ve done before in regret, it’s what makes us human” you said, making him give a huff as a chuckle. “You got anybody?” He asked, making you look down as you moved your feet along the dirt. “An ex-husband, but not anyone I really care about, no. My parents passed a few years before the bombings and he and I split up when I caught him cheating on me with some other woman in the vault..” you explained, not sure why it hurt you to tell the tale still, but you felt it was only fair considering what you’d asked of him to share. “Sorry t’ hear that” Cooper said, making you chuckle weakly, a somber look coming to your face that made his heart wrench. “I haven’t exactly been in love since, and considering he and I split up just a little over ten years ago, really says something I guess, huh?” You asked, trying to laugh to bring up the mood, knowing you sounded pathetic. “He was the fool, not you darlin’. He was the one skippin’ out on one hell of a woman” Cooper said, making you look to him and blush a bit as you gave a chuckle at his response.

“Thanks” you replied appreciatively and with a smile before casting your gaze down to see your hands were still connected and it left you blushing harder with embarrassment, you’d been holding his hand this entire time without realizing it. “Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable if I have I-“ “relax vaultie” he cut you off, pushing your hand back down onto his to assure you that he was far from uncomfortable. “It’s…rather nice actually” he admitted, making you feel relieved but your heart fluttered in your chest from it. A thick tension soon began to set in between you both after that night, something of an unspoken, kindling romance beginning to develop. “Then there it can stay” you said, making him smile softly at you, tipping his hat at you as a silent thank you.

Months passed on like this, where you’d spend the days scavenging, picking the land for its resources you could find and hunting bounties by day, then spending your nights by a fire growing closer and closer with every passing day. Through your shared meals, jokes, deep conversations, and plenty of near death experiences, you started to notice your fondness of the ghoul you traveled with. The way you’d hang onto his words with that southern accent that seemed to pull at your heart strings, or the way you’d go out of your way to stand between him and a stray bullet. You’d helped him on more than one occasion in getting out of a sticky spot, or getting him the stuff he needed to keep from turning feral. In return, he started to notice he was feeling the same towards you. There was this sudden need to keep you safe, to do nicer things for you, to speak better towards you, even flirt with you at times. Some nights there’d be so much tension in the air, it’s a miracle you haven’t jumped each other yet. Though in his eyes, as much as his heart yearned for you, he knew you were too good for him. You’d been hurt before, and he had a reputation for hurting people, feeling undeserving of even just the sweet smiles and company you afford him even now. You didn’t need someone like him, you needed a good man, someone who didn’t kill for a living, someone who could treat you right, someone who didn’t look the way he did. You were soft and warm, he was rough and cold, though he supposed that’s where the term “opposites attract” came from. So even when he was a whole bottle deep, he was sure to hold his tongue to a certain point.

Some of those nights around the fire were spent sober, others not so much, and this night happened to be one of those nights spent under the influence. You two had stumbled across a mini-mart, doing your best to out run the radstorm that had been trailing you guys for hours, coming in just to find whatever supplies you could to make it through the next week and possibly hunker down for the night. So imagine your surprise when you seemed to have found the largest chem stache you’d both ever laid eyes on. “Coop! Come here, you gotta see this” you said, making him run towards you to make sure you weren’t hurt or in trouble. His nerves were eased once he saw you, fully intact. “Tell me I’m not seeing shit” you said, pointing to all of the supplies sitting in a box on the table, joined by other supplies around it. You both looked at each other in complete and utter disbelief, this would keep you stocked for months, maybe even a whole year if you conserved it well. “Well ain’t that just the prettiest fuckin’ sight” he said. There was no way a horde of chems this large and this valuable was just completely unprotected you reasoned, so you routed around the place, scoping out for any raiders, straggling traders or ferals who happened to still be around. It was as if heaven was shining down on you both as you found no one around, seemed like no one had been here for days. So you did the most logical thing anyone would do in this situation. Stuff each of your bags to the brim of drugs of all varieties! Seeing as you had food, chems and even some clean water and alcohol lying around, Cooper locked and barricaded the door shut, proposing it could be a good spot to sleep for the night. With a radstorm approaching, it was best to have a roof over your heads to keep out the rain and potential radiation sickness that came with it. “This is the closest fuckin’ thing to a slice of heaven I’ve seen in ages” he said, aside from you is what played in his mind but he couldn’t speak that out loud, no matter how much he wanted to. “You said it!” you replied, and it’s even better with you here you thought, but thought it best to keep it to yourself. He plopped down on the couch, kicking his feet up to rest on the small table that seemed to be in shambles, enjoying a tape that was playing on the TV that he was surprised to still see functioning. “Holy shit, this thing still works?” You asked, amazed to see working technology out in the wastelands, sitting next to him as you watched it with him. He gave a smirk at your reaction, thinking it was cute the way your eyes would light up when you got all excited over something. Deep down it made him want to give you everything you laid eyes on like that just to see it pointed towards him. “Guess so” he replied, enjoying your excitement only to see you turn and look his way, which was his signal to stop staring holes into you before he gets caught. “I dunno about you baby doll, but I ain’t about to spend tonight sober with this stache sittin’ here ‘n front of us” he said, making you laugh as he routed through all the different drugs and chems til he found what he was looking for.

In the process of searching through it all, a small metal box fell to the floor at your feet. It looked like a box of mentats only the design was different, instead of the characteristic green and white box was a red one covered with hearts labeled DN-Chem. You supposed the worst that could happen was turn into the man sitting next to you, which you figured wasn’t the worst fate to succumb to all things considered, so you went against all better judgement and said fuck it, popping two of the mentat like chems and chasing it with the vodka he’d found to wait for it to take effect. “The hell is DN?” He asked, looking at the box, wondering what it was you took. “Don’t know, guess we’ll find out here soon because I took two” you said, taking another sip from the bottle of vodka he passed your way, and he gave a chuckle as you handed it back to him. “You come a mighty long way, little lady” he commented before setting the metal pill box down. He took the bottle from you, taking a swig, then placing one of the small viles into his inhaler before taking a hit of it then lying back, breathing a sigh of relief as it and the alcohol entered his system like the perfect remedy to any ailment. As about a half an hour rolled by, you waited for the high to set in but it never came, instead you were just getting hot, like really hot. There weren’t any windows open, and it was night time so you shouldn’t be this uncomfortably hot for how it was but you felt like you were on fire. “Shit, it’s hot as hell in here…” you complained, shaking off your jacket that you’d picked off of some raider a few weeks back, making him look to you curiously. “Lightweight” he quipped, making you chuckle. “Accept I don’t feel anything, I just feel hot” you said, making him hum with intrigue before turning back to the TV. “Give it some time, you’re new to all this. ‘m sure your body is wonderin’ what the hell you just put in it” he said, and he had a good point, maybe it was just a side effect of not doing them so often compared to his every day use.

As time went on, you began to notice the way your eyes couldn’t help but be glued to him, more specifically glued to the way his legs were now spread as he sat back. You wondered to yourself what he looked like beneath all that cowboy get up, what his reaction would be like to see you getting on your knees for him and slotting yourself between his spread legs. You shook your head to try and rid yourself of such inappropriate thoughts, but what you couldn’t stop no matter how hard you tried was the feeling of arousal beginning to pool in your panties. Sure he flirted with you every now and again, but you doubt he felt towards you the same way you did for him. To him you were sure you were likely more akin to a pet than a friend, useful and nice to have around, but not anything further. At least so you thought. You’d rather hoped you were wrong in assuming so, that maybe he saw you the same way you saw him. You bit your lip as you tried bouncing your leg to relieve the ache between your thighs, a light pink dusting your face and neck even up to the tips of your ears, but nothing worked. Even as you closed your eyes, all you could picture was you laid out on the couch beneath him, or bent over it with him behind you, or you riding him on it. “Been awful quiet. You doin’ alright over there, sweetheart?” Cooper asked you, and the audible whimper you let out from the nickname left you completely embarrassed. You clasped a hand over your mouth, god you were horrified but he gave a grin and a chuckle in response. “I’m so sorry, I don’t know what’s gotten into me all the sudden. I feel so…weird?” you said, unsure if that was really the proper word to explain it but it was the only way you could really word it off the top of your head with how much your brain felt as if it was turning to mush. “Ya took some chems, it’s gonna feel a bit fuzzy” he said, trying to assure you that feeling a little funny was normal, but this? This didn’t feel normal, not even for a chem high. You tried your best to swallow harshly, doing everything you could to try and relieve the dry ache you felt in your throat at the moment upon looking at him. You grabbed the bottle of vodka, taking a few sips but even that couldn’t grant you bliss from it. The throbbing in your core was driving you absolutely insane. You swore up and down that it was like you could feel your heartbeat in your chest, stomach, and in your cunt all at the same time. “No, this is different…I don’t think what I took was a normal chem, Coop…” you said, trying not to panic at the effects that were setting in but god you felt like you were absolutely feral. He turned to look at you, watching as you clamped your thighs together and the red that fell over your face. “I feel like an animal in heat” you said bluntly, making him go into a near coughing fit as you took him off guard. However that piqued his interest enough to pick up the little metal box again to see what it was you took. “I ain’t ever heard of a chem that does that, was that DN shit the only stuff you took?” He asked, growing slightly concerned for you and whether he had a possible horde of laced chems, or just an extremely horny woman on his hands. Speaking of hands, you were lost in thought staring at them, at the way they gripped the couch like you wanted him to grip your thighs, at the way they looked in those leather gloves he always wore. You wondered how it would feel wrapped around your throat, or how it would feel if his fingers were buried deep inside of you. Shit. This was getting out of control.

“Hey, ya with me still?” He asked, snapping to try and get your attention back on the matter at hand, making you shake your head yes as you broke from your perverted thoughts. “Is that DN shit the only thing you took?” He asked again, making you shake your head yes once more, because you knew damn well your voice was going to betray you the moment you tried to speak. That had to be it, it was the only thing that was different out of it all and the only thing he’d never heard of before. He knew it wasn’t the vodka either because he was drinking it with you, so if it was affecting you, it would have affected him and it hadn’t.

It took him a minute to put two and two together before he finally realized the abbreviations stood for Date Night, reading the instructions and effects on the inside of the tin’s lid. “Shit..” he said as he read it, realizing this was a hand made thing thrown into the bunch by whoever was running this place. “Did you read the lid before you popped them pills?” He asked, making you go wide eyed. As if this couldn’t get any fucking worse, this shit show could have been avoided had you just read the inside of the lid. “There was instructions?? Oh my god…what the fuck did I take?” You asked, concerned for yourself and the tone he had while reading it. “Somethin’ that the creator of it called Date Night. Looks like it’s a…well looks like it’s a handmade sex chem” he said, making you cover your face with your hands out of sheer embarrassment, you’d never wanted to die out in a radstorm more than you did right now. “Please tell me you’re fucking joking, cooper…” you whined, watching him read it more. “How much of it did you take?” He asked, almost scared to know and you were scared to know why. “Two?” You replied, making him whistle at that as he read it. “Fuckin’ hell sugar..” he said through a chuckle, and that nickname made a shiver run through you, sending electric bolts straight to your throbbing cunt. You did your best to bite back the whimper. “You’re only s’possed take one, and with you bein’ new t’ all this, I wouldn’t have taken more than half” he said, making you just wish you could just dig a hole and die in it already. “Fuck me…wait, shit! N-Not literally fuck me I- well I mean I’d like if you did but…FUCK! Forgive me Cooper, I’m so sorry, I can hardly think straight” you said, making him chuckle. “Well sweetheart, I think you and I both know there’s only one good fix for this situation” he said, making you whimper pathetically at the thought, your thighs squeezing together even more as you tried to fight to stay sane. Your eyes cast downwards to his lap once more, seeing the tent forming in his pants, clearly you weren’t the only one all worked up here. “I don’t want to make you feel like you have to, Coop. I can run off and take care of myself if it makes you uncomfort-“ you rambled but before you could finish, his hand cupped the side of your face, pulling you in for a long awaited kiss. You moaned into it without meaning to, feeling the way your body immediately relaxed upon wrapping your arms around him with no hesitation as the sweet innocent kiss turned passionate and dirty rather quickly.

“I won’t lie t’ you, doin’ this with you has passed my mind more times than I’d care to admit, but I don’t wanna cross that line unless you really want this” he said, looking into your eyes and making sure that this was truly what you wanted, that you felt the same way he did. “Coop, I know I’m under the influence of whatever the fuck this drug is, but trust me when I say, I’d be just as good with it sober. Been thinking about it for probably just as long as you have, if I’m honest with you. I want this, I want you and right now I want you so fucking bad that I might lose my mind if you don’t fuck me” you answered bluntly, taking him by surprise at just the sheer amount of absolute filth that left your otherwise innocent mouth, making him chuckle at your use of curse words and how desperate you were for him. “That so sugar?” He asked with a grin, enjoying teasing you at your neediest moments, including now. “God yes, Cooper please..” you begged, nearly moaning in reply and he’d spent time mulling over it before, denying himself the chance but just as the chem stache was a pot of gold, he took this as one of the best opportunities being placed in his lap by whatever higher power existed out there, making him waste no time in kissing you once more. “Good, because I don’t think I’d be able to hold myself back once we’ve started” he said, and the idea made you moan. “Don’t want you to hold back, want all of you” you said, and your wish was his command.

By the time your brain could finally catch up with you again, your clothes were strewn out all around you, your tank top hanging over the back of the couch, your jeans thrown haphazardly on the arm rest behind you, his pants on the floor, his hat on the table and shirt and duster having fallen somewhere behind the couch. By now, you’d already cum on his fingers twice, and on his cock once, this was your fourth round and this shit still had you on fire. “Yes!! Oh fuck, Cooper!” you moaned as your legs wrapped around his hips, keeping him as close to you as you could get, your fingers digging crescent shapes and puffy red lines into his back that unfortunately he knew wouldn’t stay long thanks to his ability to heal stupidly fast. “Doin’ so good for me, baby doll. Look so pretty like this for me, all splayed out like a needy little whore” he praised and degraded through his groans, making you moan and roll your eyes into the back of your head at the praise mixed with degradation as his cock was drilling deep inside you like tonight was all you guys had. “Yeah, you like that, huh sweet thing? Like it when I tell you how good it feels and call you names?” He asked, making you nod your head yes because there wasn’t a single thought in that brain of yours other than his name, which you spoke like a mantra. “Never knew such a sweet lil’ thing like you would be such a dirty little minx. Fuck…enough to make a man like me go feral, ya know that?” he said, making you giggle as you moved his free hand up to your throat, urging him to choke you, and he groaned at the sight. Your kiss swollen lips all puffy and shining with spit, your cheeks dusted a constant pink that grew darker anytime his cock brushed that spot deep inside that made you cling to him, your eyes half lidded, looking up at him like he was your savior. It made him absolutely rock hard knowing you’d pick him over anyone else in this god forsaken wasteland. “My, you are just a little freak, ain’t you? Oh we are gonna have fun together, you and me honey” he promised, squeezing your throat tight enough to restrict your airflow but not enough to hurt or cause any damage. Just enough to get that puddle of a brain of yours all fuzzy as you got closer to your fourth orgasm of the night. “Cooper…’m so close, so close please!!” You begged, feeling the heavy drag of his cock as he pounded into you, leaving you damn near screaming as it nudged your cervix and that spongy little bundle of nerves deep inside. “Go on honey, I gotchya. Let go for me, wanna see those pretty faces and hear those pretty noises you make” he said, angling his hips just right to hit that spot over and over again. “Oh fuck, oh fuck I’m gonna cum again, I-“ you warned before your moans rose in pitch as your walls clamped around him, gushing on his cock as your orgasm hit you like a freight train. Your body arched off the couch, stars filling your vision for a moment as you felt your release gush out and coat your inner thighs, screaming his name like it was your only chance at salvation. “Well ain’t I just the damn luckiest man in the wastelands right now, got me a pretty little vaultie and she’s a gusher” he said, making you whimper at his teasing but judging by the way he emptied himself inside you for the second time, you took it as a sign that he liked that about you. “Holy shit, I-I didn’t know I could do that” you said, thoroughly shocked with what your brain and body were doing as they almost seemed to almost be working against each other. “Do it again for me” he said, grabbing you and moving you both to where you were straddling him this time. His hands rested on your hips, helping guide you as you speared yourself on his dick with ease from how absolutely soaked you were, making you both throw your head back and moan. “Now that’s a damn good sight” he said, making you lean in to kiss him once more as his hands helped you start and keep a steady rhythm with your hips. It was definitely going to be a long night, but one you two have been needing for months, maybe even longer.

It’s a good thing ghouls have remarkable recovery time, because in order to finally get you sated and back to normal, you both had to spend all night going at it. Granted, it was aided by the mix of pent up sexual tension and pent up sexual frustration, but it was dawn before you both had gotten to a point where you could even *try* and fall sleep. First few times was on the couch between missionary, doggy and you riding him, next was you bent over it, with your pretty legs spread and ass in the air for him. Then, you used the arm rest of the couch as a pillow beneath your hips as he stood up while you laid out on the couch. He liked that one a lot for the way your tits would bounce with each and every forceful thrust into you, jolting your body. After that, it was done standing up with your back pressed against a wall, your legs and arms wrapped around him to keep him deep inside of you and fill you til he had nothing left to give you. From that point on, the rest of the night was all a hormone-hazed blur, but you knew well that he took care of you. You woke up unbelievably sore, your joints aching in places that you had no idea could even ache, a swollen, angry throb between your legs for the harsh, almost punishing treatment to your pussy followed by bruises, bite marks, scratch marks, hand prints etc. littered your skin as you woke up curled into Cooper’s side. You gave a gravelly groan as the sun shone in your eyes through the windows, making him chuckle at the way you were such a ray of sunshine except in the morning. Coming to learn that you absolutely *hated* mornings. Though you suppose you started to enjoy them more since traveling with him. “Mornin’ sunshine” he said coyly, making you groan disapprovingly at the way the sun was in your eyes, making you hold your hand up to cast a shadow on your face and grant you some relief. “Morning” you answered, your voice hoarse and half gone from sleep and all your activities that transpired the previous night. “Ain’t that a pretty sight” he said, turning and seeing you curled up to him, naked, your hair all messy from sleep and the hickeys and bite marks littering your skin, making you chuckle. “Last night was definitely something, can’t believe you’ve been holding all *that* out on me” you joked, making him give a dry laugh. “Could say the same thing about you, sugar. Had no idea that mind a yours could be so filthy. You’re a wild thing to party with, lil’ lady” he teased, sliding his arm around you to keep you close, making you hum as you lay soft, appreciative kisses to his collarbone and chest. “You’re fun too, and thank you for taking care of me last night. I’m sorry that it ended up happening the way that it did, I wanted to work up the courage and tell you some other way, I really did, but I guess life had other plans” you said making him chuckle as he saw you blush when he kissed your head. “Drunk words are sober thoughts they say, so I’d say I made out pretty good. But don’t sweat it, not sure how I deserved someone as good as you, but it’s good to know I ain’t as hard to stomach as most people say” he said, pulling you in for a soft, heartfelt kiss. “I think you are just perfect, Cooper” you said, your hand resting on his scarred chest as you looked at him with that gaze he swore he’d do anything to see pointed his way.

“You really wanna be my girl?” He asked softly, sounding shocked and with some self doubt still lacing his tone, but he had to be sure this was what you wanted outside of the drug’s effects. He cared for you deeply, in a way that he hasn’t felt in a very long time, but maybe you were just the right person for him to finally open his heart up to. His question made you giggle as your heart fluttered in your chest with excitement. “I absolutely do, I meant it when I said it last night, I mean it just as much now. I think we’ve danced around it for long enough, don’t you?” you replied, making him smile the most genuinely happy smile you’ve seen him wear since you’d met. “Just checkin’” he said, before laying a sweet kiss to your lips, wishing every morning could be like this one. Maybe it could, now that you were here with him.

[base0h]

HOW HAIKYUU CHARACTERS WOULD REACT TO YOU COMPLIMENTING ANOTHER PLAYER

a/n - I’m alive I swear 💀 I just rewatched some of haikyuu so I’m more familiar with that rn 😂😂

warnings ⚠️ - g/n reader, fluff/crack, pre-timeskip characters btw, I don’t feel like making picture banners for all of them like I do with one piece forgive me for just putting text 🥲

HINATA

- yeah you just broke your bro’s heart into a billion pieces

- remember that time when he got nailed in the crotch by a ball in S4? Yeah that’s what it felt like

- “Isn’t he so cool Hinata?!” -you

- but he’s also torn because he also thinks they’re awesome af 😭 so he can’t decide if he’s more saddened by the fact that you’re not saying that about him or if he’s excited that you also like one of his idols

- “…Yes he’s— very cool.” -hinata

- “…You do know my fav player’s always gonna be you though right?”

- oh you don’t even KNOW. How happy you just made him. You just turned his life around with just a single sentence

- bro could burst through the ceiling now

- he basically smothered you with a hug after that and did one of those koala hugs where he was basically just clinging onto you with pure adoration and affection

- it’s one thing if some random other student or little kid came up to him saying he was cool— like don’t get me wrong he’d probably freak out in a good way about that too

- but when it comes from you? He could have all haters but if he still had you? He’s totally fine. All bro needs is your support

- but do be careful because he might actually suffocate you one day if you compliment him too much

- each time you say something good about him his hugs get stronger?? If that’s even possible idk 😭

- you’ll have a great free chiropractor tho so woo hoo😁👍

GOSHIKI

- bro has a thing for getting compliments or getting praise. I saw it VERY clearly when Hinata gave him that compliment about his spikes during the shiratorizawa training camp

- and then when Tendo said his bangs were cool bro was so happy 😭 (he’s so sweet oml)

- but of course when you watch his matches— I mean— you’re gonna be impressed by ushijima

- who wouldn’t be? Bros a literal nuclear bomb ahh spiker 💀

- after one of his matches you went up to him and started talking about ushijima and how cool his spikes and serves were

- “I feel like he’s gonna literally pop the ball everytime he hits it! It’s awesome!” -you

- he agrees wholeheartedly with you! But— man. He wanted you to say that about him 😭

- “Yeah— he’s amazing right..?” -him

- “He’s a third year right?”

- Goshiki nodded and scratched the back of his head sheepishly, looking a bit down

- “Oh so he’s just clearing the way for you then! There can only be one ace so he’s gotta move out of the way for you.”

(I couldn’t find the proper meme to put here so here’s the actual screenshot of him)

- bro could ascend

- he could die right then and there

- but then he remembered he has to show off for you still so he stayed on earth

- ushijima heard you say that btw

- it looked like he wanted to murder you but in reality he thought it was very nice of you to say that to lift goshiki’s spirits

- he just— looks like he wants to crush you and send you to mars 💀

- also Tendo makes fun of him for being so happy about being praised

- “HAHAHAHAH— you LOVE it when y/n ever tells you something positive about you huh~??” -tendo

- yeah no he’s not gonna leave your poor bowl cut boy alone about it now

BOKUTO

- like the other two, he’s big on praise

- I mean before every match the manager tells him someone in the audience said he looks cool so he plays better 😭😭

- having you supporting him at his matches is like having an entire stadium full of people cheering his name

- you make Akaashi’s life less stressful. Good job y/n, Akaashi loves you for that and will legit pay you money to keep coming even though he knows he doesn’t have to. He’s that grateful for you

- I ain’t kidding one time Akaashi just started tearing up thanking you for being his fail safe plan if his 2000000 other plans to get Bokuto out of his emo mode don’t work

- he knows just like one compliment from you will cure Bokuto

- yeah so guess what you had to go and say right before a match started?

- “I just saw itachiyama play and wow that Sakusa guy who’s one of the top 3 spikers was just as good as they said he was!” -you

- akaashi might just do a backflip off of the stadium roof at this point 🙂 hardcore parkour

- the way you could literally see Bokuto’s hair droop down is insane

- konoha and sarukui were like: holy shit we’re absolutely cooked 😀

- this wasn’t an emo mode this was an avant garde mode

- but right as Akaashi was about to seriously jump off the roof, you saved everyone from the disaster you created

- “I don’t know why you’re not in the top three though, imo you’re a lot better than that guy, and a lot cooler looking too.”

- Akaashi looked like he was gonna live again

- Bokuto’s hair flipped back upwards and he excitedly smiled at you, giving you a big hug before going onto the court with an ecstatic air about him

- Akaashi is genuinely terrified of how you can simultaneously destroy their team and bring it back together with singular sentences

- you’re Bokuto’s weakness number 38 which akaashi does not have a solution for 💀

AKAASHI

- Akaashi is honestly happy you’re just with him

- he doesn’t really mind it if you can’t come to see him play, of course he’d love for you to be there but he totally understands if you can’t, and won’t be destroyed about it

- he loves your support and will always appreciate you for cheering him on (and being his mental support because taking care of Bokuto is life draining and he probably gets about a month taken off of his life everytime Bokuto goes into his emo mode)

- during the match with nekoma, you noticed how the setter on their team was also quite an intelligent and skilled player despite seeming so bored and uninterested in the sport entirely

- he had a hold on Bokuto for a good while and it was impressive how he managed to put Bokuto in a slump so smoothly and discreetly

- after the match, you congratulated fukurodani on their victory, and akaashi thanked you for coming like the gentleman bro is

- “That setter on nekoma was really good— he was so calculating and calm about his strategy to make Bokuto go into a slump!” -you

- Akaashi was still a bit traumatized by Bokuto literally forgetting how to do cross shots entirely so uh— 😀

- yeah it didn’t really sound great to him

- bro had to pull out a whole ass speech plus hinata to get Bokuto back on his feet and then you say that 🥲

- he isn’t mad or anything but he isn’t very overjoyed either

- “Yes, he was a really tough opponent. Kuroo-san was too.” -Akaashi

- Akaashi was good at hiding his displeasure, so it just sounded like he was saying something normal like he usually would, in a straight steady tone

- “No match for you and the team though, you guys definitely deserved the win. And you actually look interested and not like you want to die on the court unlike that setter on nekoma— he looked like he wanted to collapse and sleep forever after the first set.”

- he wasn’t expecting you to say that, and he looked pleasantly surprised

- Bokuto grinned and put his arm around the setter

- “Y/n’s right as always, Kenma’s no match for akaashi!” -Bokuto

- the rest of the team wholeheartedly agreed, and akaashi felt glad, happy to know that his team, and especially you thought so highly of him

- no one else could handle Bokuto like he could, and no one could be as cool in your eyes as he was

- you could probably tell him his glasses looked nice and he would never take them off again—

- he’s the type of guy to listen to whatever you say a bit too much sometimes 😭

- he legit remembers the outfit you wore the day he first met you

- kinda creepy but sweet ig? 🤷

OIKAWA

- bro has a billion fans and only really cares abt you cheering him on

- like ofc he needs other people to be cheering him on too because he’s extra like that but it’s 80% you

- don’t ask abt the 20%

- yk how all those girls were asking for his picture and stuff? Ever since he got together with you, he’s been avoiding them a lot more

- he knows it’s probably especially annoying for you to see a bunch of random people asking your boyfriend for pictures and giving him handmade things

- just know that he thinks you’re better than any girl combined and if you ever like start walking away before he’s finished trying to get the girls away from him he will legit sprint after you while screaming

- “Y/N-CHAN WAAAAAAAAAIT!!!”

- my dude is running, and I mean running like a mf track star. You piss off his fangirls so much bro it’s so funny how they look at you like they want to poison you in your sleep💀💀💀

- he reassures you on the daily that you’re beautiful and amazing, but still it’s annoying to see all the girls fawn over him

- so you decided to give him a similar taste of his own medicine

- at the next matches, you were watching with him a match with karasuno and shiratorizawa. You know VERY well that he does not like karasuno or shiratorizawa

- ushijima is probably the one who’s the worst…

- perfect.

- “Whoa Ushijima’s serves are so cool!! And he uses his left hand too damn that’s unique! I’ve never seen a left handed player like him before, and those spikes look like they’re about to tear karasuno’s blocker’s arms off!” -you

- I don’t think he’s ever been more simultaneously heart broken, and pissed at ushijima at the same time before

- he’s such a baby about it too

- he’ll cross his arms and act like he doesn’t care when obviously he does, and with the way he’s pouting about it like a little kid was proof that your little plan worked very well

- “Hmph, I guess so.” -him

- “What, you salty since you lost?” -you

- “Would you mind not rubbing salt in it? It’s only been like two days!”

- you couldn’t help but burst out into laughing because of how upset he was by this— it was ridiculous

- if you had your phone out you would’ve taken a picture of his face and sent it to iwaizumi for shits and giggles

- “I’m joking Oikawa, I think you’re much cooler than ushijima. You have a lot more personality than him.” -you

- “That’s damn right I do!” -him

- “…I didn’t say a good personality or anything.”

- “Pardon me?! I’m very demure and cute thank you very much.”

- “You saying that just proves you’re anything but that.”

- “Y/N BE NICE TO ME :(“

- “No. :)”

- “I knew I shouldn’t have let you hang out with Iwa-chan, he’s turned you against me!”

KUROO

- you’re the carbon to his dioxide

- the hydrogen to his peroxide

- the deoxyribose to his phosphate group (I paid attention in science kuroo, yw)

- even if he doesn’t get to be interviewed by some reporter, and even if he doesn’t get to go to nationals

- if you’re there and supporting him he feels better

- talking to you and hearing you say how cool he plays is more than an interview could ever mean to him

- seriously you make him chemically insane

- like he does not understand how just being around you releases endorphins somehow (you’re magical)

- you had heard of their opponents nohebi from eavesdropping on a couple of random people’s conversations in the lobby

- they were a strong team, and you were intrigued by how a lot of people seemed to dislike them a lot for the way they played.. which was very underhanded

- but even with their underhanded tactics, they were a solid team with good technique and teamwork

- “Whoa the captain of nohebi is actually pretty good!” -you

- “Ugh I know right? Come on nekoma!” -Akane (Yamamoto’s little sister)

- I feel like kuroo has horrible eyesight but then absolutely amazing hearing? Idk 💀 but whatever the case was, he heard that

- loud and clear

- mhm he’s ready to kill nohebi now

- bro is legit a one man Great Wall of china now

- he’s “powered up” as Kenma would say

- Kenma took note that you were kuroo’s power up skill, and would remember to use you in the future as well

- I’m serious bro is flexing so hard on you rn 😭

- he is working double time, sweating, tryna channel his inner Bokuto

- yaku hasn’t needed to save the ball because kuroo’s trying so hard to impress you 💀

- honestly it’s kind of amazing— seeing him sprinting left and right and slamming balls down like it was no one’s business but his

- he checks like every five seconds to see if you’re watching his amazing skills

- and after the match— Kenma went up to you first and thanked you bc Kuroo did like 70% of the work for him 😭

- Kenma legit gave you a Nintendo gift card he’s had in his back pocket since 2019 as a thank you gift and as a “please continue making kuroo do all the work” gift

- god knows how it’s stayed in his pants that have probably been through countless wash cycles 💀

- “Oh kuroo! Fukunaga’s last spike was so cool! He totally hit that line shot perfectly!”

- way to stab kuroo in the back 🥲 he’s legit about to collapse from emotionally throwing out his back

- old man down over here

- he was so destroyed— you left no piece of him intact he’s in literal shambles

- “But kuroo you were so cool! You kept blocking and repelling the balls like you were oppositely charged from the ball!”

- and he’s alive again, you’re a magician

- complimenting him using a science reference?

- oh just marry him already 😭

- he knew you must just be dopamine bc he smiles like an idiot whenever you’re around

- somehow his smile gets even dorkier when you compliment him

- if it’s a science compliment he could quite literally ascend to the moon

- “Hehe thanks y/n.” -him

- “Were you tryna show off in the last set?” -you

- “…Why? Did it work?”

- “…Hm. Perhaps hypothetically, yes.”

- “How does one go about making that hypothesis a true statement? 😏”

- kuroo is so nerdy and his pickup lines are so bad that it just takes whatever smoothness he had (very little to start with btw) away 😭😭😭

- like pls when he first met you when yall were paired up to do a science project about magnetism— bro said

- “Even Neodymium would lose if it were to compete against your magnetic personality 😏🌹”

- “…What? 💀” -you

- you weren’t really sure if you should love bro for his effort or be scared of how bad his pickup lines were

- the answer is both

- it all ended up ok anyways— you’re bonded to him together since yall are oppositely charged ✌️

a/n - no I don’t know how to make pickup lines 💀

[leclercsainzz]

ILLICIT AFFAIRS PART 4

PAIRINGS: lando norris x ex!gf / tom blyth x reader

TYPE: social media au

WARNING: // cheating implied

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, hunterschafer, and 678,889 others

yourusername: more photo dumps of my favorite ppl (ft. me)

tagged: @tomblyth @hunterschafer @joshandresrivera

view 6,021 comments

user: MY FAVORITE CAST!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

user: bye, bc how did lucy gray leave a man like him???

↳ user: the way i would’ve believed EVERY word that came out his mouth and stayed with him, frrrr

↳ user: she’s a better woman than me 😭😭

user: the green jackets, hello?????

user: @landonorris

hunterschafer: love you, girlfriend 😘

user: hottest cast ever, idc

user: did tom and yn share the same jacket on set???

↳ user: literally my parents

joshandresrivera: ❤️❤️

user: soo are you and lando still together or???

user: yntom shipper >>>>

user: she looks so adorable in that second slide

tomblyth: ❤️❤️❤️❤️

tomblyth: you’re my favorite person ever

↳ user: my heart 😭😭😭😭😭

↳ user: this is too cute, wtf????

↳ user: if they don’t date, i’m gonna be so upset

user: sOMEONE GEt ME A TOM BLYTH, RIGh nOw!!!!!!!

user: babe, are you and dad (lando) still together???

↳ user: girllll, i’m pretty sure they’re done

user: tom’s the reason why my standard in man are high

songbirdandsnakes: our favs! ❤️

user: please, date!! 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

user: all i can think about is lando 🥺

user: you know damn well lando didn’t cheat on you

↳ user: how you gonna say that when there’s proof??

user: my favorites <3

user: where’s lando??

user: my comfort cast, i swear ❤️

user: yntom nation please rise

user: i wanna cry so bad bc i feel bad for lando 😭😭😭

↳ user: feel bad??? wdym?? he cheated???

↳ user: the only reason he might’ve cheated was because yn literally cheated on him first??????? hello???

user: if only coryo had been honest with her 😩

user: idc what anyone says, tom and yn are soulmates

user: this cast >>

user: her smile 🥺 she’s too cute

user: my babies

user: i can (not) accept the fact that lucy gray and coriolanus didn’t end together but i will NOT accept if yn and tom don’t end up together irl

user: who needs eminem when you’ve got paneminem

↳ yourusername: STEALING THIS, OMG!

luisinhaoliveira99

liked by kellypiquet, maxfewell and 431,028 others

luisinhaoliveira: weekend getaway 😙

view 2,846 comments

user: not her trying to soft launch 😭😭😭😭

user: more like weekend cheat-away

user: pretty girl 😍

user: wait- so she’s actually with lando????

user: girl, he ain’t interested in you let’s bffr

user: he didn’t even like or comment 🤣

user: luuuuuuu 😍😍😍

user: how does it feel to have yn’s left overs??

user: is she aware that he’s just using her???

user: @landonorris @landonorris @yourusername @yourusername

user: lando couldn’t even handle yn and ya’ll believe he can handle this beautiful woman?? 😭😭😭

user: acting like that’s her man 💀

user: hate to break it to you but once a cheater always a cheater 🫢 so you best watch out, babes

user: YOU’RE the other woman, don’t get it twisted

user: ynlando >>

user: why are you soft launching as if no one knows?

↳ user: she really thought she ate 😂😂😂

user: you’re beautiful!!! 😩😩

user: is that lando or??

user: CRYING 😭😭😭 home girl thought she did something by “soft-launching” LMAOOOOOOOOO

user: ya’ll are so mean, omg 😭 it’s not her fault lando cheated

↳ user: she knew he was in a relationship and still got with him?????? hello??????

user: he ain’t even comment 💀💀💀💀

↳ user: let alone like 😭

user: @landonorris this your new girl???

user: this means i finally have a chance with THE yn ln!! 🥳

↳ user: hate to break it to you, but that’s tom’s girl now

user: ya’ll calling lando a cheater when it’s yn 😂😂😂

user: anyways

user: this drama’s sooo goood

user: u and lando are so cute 🥰🥰🥰

↳ user: they both belong in the street

oscarpiastri: lmao

comment has been deleted

user: where’s lando?? waiting for a comment or like

user: ya’ll are so mean 😭😭😭

user: yntom >>>

user: yn’s better than me bc i would be DRAGGING both their asses on the internet right about now, idccc

↳ user: girl, frrrr

↳ user: it just shows how she’s being the bigger person in this whole bs, tbh

post has been deleted

yourusername

liked by tomblyth, landonorris and 695,899 others

yourusername: thank you, next 💋

view 5,725 comments

user: not lando still being in her likes 😭

↳ user: mans is DESPERATE for her attention

isahernaez: eres realmente una belleza 😍

see translation: you’re truly a beauty

hunterschafer: WOW

hunterschafer: YOURE A GODDESS

hunterschafer: MY GODDDD 😍😍😍

oliviarodrigo: gorgeous gorgeous girl! 😩

↳ yourusername: right back at youuu, ml 💗

user: can’t believe lando let this gorgeous woman go

user: lando fucks shit up but yn comes and serves each time

↳ user: all she does is post and comes up with a caption and yet she remains unbothered and iconic!

↳ user: she shuts la*do up by posting, i swear

user: MOTHER ASF 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

user: babes in her reputation era

lilymhe: absolute beauty right here! 😮‍💨

user: teach me your ways

tomblyth: okay, we get it, you’re incredibly gorgeous

↳ yourusername: oh stop, you’re making me blush

↳ user: ooohhh????

tomblyth: can i be your next?

↳ yourusername: you’d like wouldn’t you? 🤔

↳ tomblyth: i just want to show you off

↳ user: QUICK: someone check on lando

↳ user: ARE THEY FLIRTING OR?????

↳ user: i find it hard to believe they’re not a thing

user: tom and yn flirting??!???? 👀

user: “i just want to show you off” SIR????

↳ user: if your man ain’t show you off, he ain’t the one

user: i just know lando is crying right now

↳ user: as he should!

user: mother is serving, ohhh myyy 😍😍😍

user: TOM’s COMmENT????

user: if her and tom don’t get together ima have a mental breakdown, i swear

user: serving as always!!!

user: unbothered queen

user: YNTOM NATION RISE!!!!!!!!!!

carlossainz55: that’s my best friend!

user: lando liked 😭😭

↳ user: he’s craving yn’s attention, but then again i would too

user: screw tom … let ME be your next

user: i WANNA BE UR NEXT, BABE

user: 😍😍😍😍😍 WOW WOW WOW

user: mother is mothering

user: @landonorris apologies to mom so we can move on

↳ user: i NEED them together 😭😭😭

user: SLAYYYY

oscarpiastri: 🤩🤩🤩

imessage

tomblyth

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55 and 674,037 others

tomblyth: here’s to another epic outing w/ my favorite people!

tagged: @yourusername @joshandresrivera @hunterschafer

view 5,601 comments

user: yntom being each other’s favorite person >>> 🥰

user: hunter & yn singing “you belong with me” is a slayyyyy

user: josh’s message 🤣

user: the 5th pic OMGGG ❤️❤️❤️

joshandresrivera: i feel exposed 😔

joshandresrivera: art admiring art 😍

↳ yourusername: aw thank you! (he was looking at me btw)

↳ joshandresrivera: can you not?? 🙄

↳ tomblyth: can you blame me?

↳ user: IMA GO SHOWER WITH MY TOASTER BRB

user: i love them omg

user: yn better have dedicated “you belong with me” to tom

user: my parents, frrrr

user: 5th slide 😭😭😭

user: are they dating?? officially??

hunterschafer: same time next week?

hunterschafer: i love you alllll 😘

user: my yntom heart is giggling at the 5th slide

user: this cast has my heart, i swear!! ❤️❤️❤️

yourusername: my favorite boy everrrr <33

yourusername: 😘😘😘 ilyyyy

↳ user: @landonorris

↳ user: nahhhhh 😭😭

user: IF THEY DONT DATE WITHIN THE NEXT WEEK OR WHATEVER IM GONNA GO APESHIT, OMG

user: yn should’ve sang “london boy”

user: my yntom heart 😩😩😩

user: the 5th slide has me grinning ear to ear

user: THE HEAD LEAN 😭😭😭😭

user: she’s living her best life with him, i swear 🥰

↳ user: she’s definitely glowing!!

user: she deserves a guy like him … who will treat her right

user: i love this friendship 😩

user: them >>>>>

user: they’re in love, your honor

user: i hope they’re together ❤️

↳ user: i feel like they’re keeping it private

user: lando’s currently going apeshit

user: @landonorris

user: singing “you belong with me” SLAYYYYYYYYY

user: i love them 😭😭😭 together or not

user: soulmates frrr

user: mom and dad ❤️❤️

yourusername

liked by oliviarodrigo, tomblyth and 624,510 others

yourusername: 🍃

view 4,028 comments

user: IS THAT LANDO??????

↳ user: you really think that’s lando?? 🤣

↳ user: YES!

user: whatever tom’s doing is working bc she’s glowing

user: that’s definitely tom, OMG!!!!

user: her smile 😩😩

lilymhe: you’re unreal, i swear

↳ yourusername: says YOU 😩

user: yn post whatever la*do sent you, please!!!

user: is she soft launching or??

user: lando?

charlottesiine: you >>> 😍😍

user: she’s glowing 😍✨

↳ user: tom’s the one making her ✨ GLOW ✨ like this!!

user: wait is that lando??? or tom???

user: i find it funny how ppl think that’s lando 😭😭

hunterschafer: you’re sooo prettyyyyy

user: she’s literally glowing 😍😍😍😍

user: the last pic 😩 i LOVE THEM, OMGG

user: such a natural beauty, i swear

user: @tomblyth KEEP MAKING HER GLOW LIKE THIS!!!

user: yk damn well the relationship between her and lando was falling apart the moment she stopped glowing like this

user: she’s radiating so much energy ✨✨✨

user: it’s clear to see that she's in love, her face is radiating with joy and happiness …. you can see it in her beaming smile

↳ user: she’s glowing with love, and it’s a beautiful sight

user: your face is mesmerizing 😩😩😩

tomblyth: i’m enthralled by your beauty

↳ user: SOMEONE GET ME A MAN LIKE THIS, I SWEAR

↳ user: he’s sooo in love 😩

tomblyth: stunning views

↳ yourusername: don’t boost my ego like that 🙄 or else …

↳ tomblyth: can you just accept my compliment for once?

↳ user: you cannot tell me these two aren’t together bc they certainly are!!

zendaya: are you even real? 😍

↳ yourusername: coming from youu??? 😩😩

danielricciardo: who’s got you smiling like that??

↳ carlossainz55: ^^

↳ yourusername: wouldn’t ya’ll like to know

user: i can’t imagine being as beautiful as you

↳ yourusername: you’re a beautyyy <333

↳ user: i lOve you omg!!! ❤️❤️❤️

user: 😍😍😍😩😩😩😩😩

user: she’s smiling brighter than ever 🥰🥰🥰

user: gorggg

landonorris: 😍

comment has been deleted

user: MOTHER’S GLOWING!! AS SHE SHOULD!!

user: tHe last slide 😭😭😭😭

taglist:

@tomblyth-tsunoda @love4josh @dudde-44 @coconut-dreamz @newlifeforus @loxbbg @dakotali @f1footballluvverr @mountmaason19 @poppyflower-22 @magical-spit @nazm145 @nikolaros22 @sincerlymatakorama @36babyg @bucket-of-fanfiction @gyunheat @millyswife @onlyrealjoy @ocyeanicc @sarah-thatstings-ann @ushygushybaby @shrimpybbq @reyfolks @earth-to-lottie @smugrogerina @jenniferrvsesi @aleidag1rly @charlesswife @sheluvsf1 @omgsuperstarg @krispy-r @lwritesstuff @eutrizbea @psychiceaglepeach @theseerbetweenus

[queenofallimagines]

Lucifer with a southern s/o

A/N: was thinking about how fucking WEIRD southern sayings are bc like ik he would go through the 7 stages of grief

Lucifer:

- he’s stressed

- Satan is cackling

- He’s like where on EARTH did you hear that??

- Like damn humans think THAT about him?😭

- “Mammon: Yo mc look! It’s raining while it’s sunny outside

- Mc: oh yeah. That means the devil beating his wife

- The whole ass room stills

- “….i beg your pardon??”

- “It’s this weird saying old people use when it’s raining and there’s no clouds. ‘The devil is beating his wide and marrying his child’

- “IM WHAT???”

- The way these usually have Satan at the beginning but they’re not the same person so he’s dodging the bullets

- He’s got so many more grey hairs

- You’ll be chilling w him in the student council room and mammon start w some bullshit

- “The devil is a lie! I saw your ass steal that!”

- He’s withering away💀

- Diavolo is like???

- “MC are these common sayings?”

- “Mhm especially in the Bible Belt they got a lot of them”

- “Can I hear some more?”

- “PLEASE don’t do this to me”

- He’s stressed bc on one hand it’s a habit so he can’t tell you to stop

- On the other why do humans say this why do they think this WHO MADE THAT RUMOR??

- “My grandma said if you run around the house three times you could hear it-“

- “WHAT??!?”

- He’s on his knees crying for this to stop bc you don’t have any explanation behind them

- “Idk they just told us that.”

- “But WHY? Like what’s the myth behind that??”

- “I think someone just made it up there’s no story.”

- Does keep a list down of the shit you say so he can translate it

- Ngl he was giggling when you told mammon he “ain’t got the sense god gave him”

- “When it was thundering and sunny they used to say god moving the furniture around.”

- “….okay that might actually be true.”

- Like he’s 20 pages deep in Google trying to find an answer

- “Hailing when it’s sunny means the devils wife is cheating on him.”

- “Mc my beloved I’m gunna need you to explain this shit to me”

- He’s like tired to his very soul

[sucka4pain]

𝐁𝐈𝐆 𝐁𝐎𝐎𝐓𝐘 𝐁𝐈𝐓𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐒 𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐘!❣︎

haikyuu men with a thicc!s/o

Bokuto Koutarō, Aran Ojiro, Ushijima Wakatoshi, & Tsukishima Kei

Includes: Ass slapping, sloppy make outs, mentions of sex, sexual tensions, possessiveness, and dirty talk

Probably went a little overboard with Ushijima and Aran but can’t blame me🤭

Pronouns aren’t really mentioned

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!!

Bokuto Koutarō

The PERFECT COUPLE!!

Nothing is better a couple who both have CAKE

He likes to play with your ass. LIKE DRUMS. Not THAT way…

He likes to slap it while you are laying on your stomach.

Even tells you to play with his😭

“Come on Y/n! It’s actually fun!!” “Kou, I’m not gonna mess around with your ass😑” “please?🥺” “…Fine”

Now he’s happy.

Okay but like when he FIRST slapped your ass, he was FLABBERGASTED!

Bro was shocked by the recoil on that thang

When you guys are fucking he ALWAYS has to do back shots first.

Him seeing your ass bounce back on his dick as he breaks your back just gives him heart eyes.

100% has his hands on your ass at ALL times!

Even when making out especially

If you two are out walking and you have on jeans, he has his hand in one of your back pockets.

Aran Ojiro

Ugh black KING😫

He’s an ass man it’s the truth

HE HITS IT FROM THE BACK EVERY TIME!🗣️

Your with your friends in a party and your twerking? He is RIGHT behind you catching it.

“Damn Babe, did your ass get fatter or what?🥴” “It’s the same as always babe😂” “Definitely hitting it from the back again tonight..” “Oh hell nah! You nearly broke my back last time!😭” “Baby that ain’t my fault you walking around with THAT behind you😍”

He is a SUCKERRRRRR for you in jeans

You know damn well he is gonna be staring

Always gives your ass a slap before going in a game or even practice

He does it to kinda embarrass you but he calls it his ‘Good luck charm’

Sloppy make out sessions on his bed with you on his lap. His hands placed on your ass, squeezing and rubbing the soft surface as your arms are wrapped around his neck. Pulling him closer into the kiss making it even messier.

“You wanna fuck?” “Aran No!!” CAN NOT have a make out session without you guys fucking afterwards.

Ushijima Wakatoshi

Lets be honest here

He stares with NO shame!

When walking together in public he’s always behind you

He doesn’t want anyone to stare at what’s his

Another one that was flabbergasted when he saw the recoil.

Short scenario:

You and your friends are having fun at a club. Ushijima and his team are chilling and talking. They hear cheers and look over to see you twerking on your friend, having a good ass time. NOW you at the time has TIGHT ass jeans. He blushed a little and his jaw dropped seeing how smooth and effortlessly you where doing it. You where barely moving and yet it was jiggling.

Hugs you from behind just to feel your ass rub against his crotch

As lewd as he thinks it is, he can’t help it

Don’t matter where or what time he is STARING!!

Your cooking and your back is facing towards him? He’s looking

You walk past him to leave and hang out with friends? He’s LOOKING (and tried to sneakily take a picture but fails cause his flash was on)

Even during practice he is staring!

“Wakatoshi quit staring at Y/n and focus on practice!!” Coach yelled and he nods going back to practice.

Tsukishima Kei

Ohohohoho lord…

Every second he gets, he’s slapping that ass

“Oh sorry Y/n, there was a bug on you~” “Mother fucker touch my ass again.” Guess what. He touches it.

Which resulted to him getting kicked where the sun don’t shine!

Looks like someone won’t be having kids!!

Jokes aside, he is VERY possessive

Gets mad at anyone and anything for looking.

Even if a kid just looks at you he’s gonna be like “What are you staring at?”

Like bro chill it’s a kid 💀

Loves to fuck you doggy style in front of a mirror and makes you watch.

“Look at that baby, you like getting pounded like this hm? Such a dirty little slut you are.”

2022 ©sᴜᴄᴋᴀ4ᴘᴀɪɴ — do not repost or translate my work. likes, reblogs, and comments are welcome!!

[razorblade180]

Tea? Venting? I don’t know

Ya know it’s kinda crazy I can still find people who absolutely can’t forgive Jaune for trying to court Weiss a few times but yet these same people recognize that Weiss and Blake are no longer a racist and a terrorist respectively.

Like I would understand if he was unhealthily obsessive, Weiss was genuinely pissed about the experience or actually told him directly to stop doing what he’s doing because it bothers her, but she truly couldn’t care less at the time and chalked it up to a boy after her name.

Canonically speaking, he flirted with her the first day, asked if she wanted to hangout after school one time, and then asked if she would go to dance with him potentially. After that he saw her pursue someone else and he went about his life. Was he a little cringe? Absolutely. But he never devalued or disrespected Weiss for his own selfish reasons? Not once. He’s just a dude who genuinely liked a girl for reasons he explained and gave a few separate and respectful attempts that weren’t “date me” but scenarios to hangout and talk.

Also, nobody ever wants throw shade on their friends who kinda encourage him to try again, or at the very least not stop immediately because Weiss wasn’t actually bothered nor was Jaune legitimately going too far.

Now I know someone says “If someone says no to a hangout then clearly-” Listen, I get it, and I understand. Real world speaking, people should have that level of self awareness and respect to try once. However, the real world also has many people that have the mindset that courting should involve someone being persistent and playing hard to get must be done. It sucks. Can’t stand it, but also those people aren’t just going to go away. At best it’s a case by case basis were individuals know to be respectful and communicate.

Back to the fictional show though, I’ve also seen people comment “I can’t believe he never apologized.” Bruh, Weiss and Jaune save each other often and talk kindly to one another. Weiss has no ax to grind with him about their history so why do you? She’s not losing sleep over it. Honestly I wouldn’t be surprised if both of them missed the teenage drama of Beacon Days. Would it be nice if they had a conversation and he brought up how cringe he was towards her? Yeah it would be a sweet moment but also funny from Weiss’s perspective because she’s 100% self aware enough to know that him getting hung up on that flaw is so wild compared to thinking about her former flaws. I can totally see Weiss downplaying it for her own sake by going “Don’t worry about it. We both said and did some…embarrassing things back things back then.” As she tries not to think about how she drew Sun and called him a filthy faunus. 💀

In Summary, Weiss ain’t trippin about it, so why should you? They’re literally friends.

By the way, we don’t have a have single legitimate scene of Blake acknowledging to Yang that leaving without a word letter to give was really fucked up, and yet they’re fine and dating. If you can accept that unspoken apology, you can accept this.

[grimmcheems]

The blonde trio after the Quirk War

So I did a continuation of the my previous Villain Aoyama AU art lmao. Ig it’s not rly an AU canonically?? (Though idk how the manga has been handling my boi since I dropped it after his reveal oop) anywayyssssss…..these babies now have to live with new identities and frequently change jobs every year in order to keep a low profile.

Monoma works as a Cab/Taxi driver and street food chef(think like hole in the wall restaurant?/place with frequent customers but within the backstreets of cities) Toga is a Sales Clerk💀(don’t ask how she even managed to get the job, the hiring manager was probably too scared by her aura to refuse her) AND Tutor(don’t ask how she landed that either since she never got to finish high school to begin with) and Aoyama works as a Bartender in a HOST CLUB(Kurogiri helped him land the job and taught him some cool stuff from his experience of working their dingy bar they used to live in with the LOV[which has since been disbanded after the quirk war].

Btw I added the “Kumo/Kuro” bc Shirakumo and Kurogiri get it? Idrk why I decided to add him in last minute but I thought it’d be funny if he pretended/acted to be their dad when they escape during their trial and onto living in the streets (for the sake of being brief: which ends in them faking their own deaths. I thought to make an art of the events leading up to this but who knows how long that will take me or when I’ll get to it🗿it is also pretty gruesome with the way I imagined it for my AU so I’m not sure if many people would even be up for seeing that oop)

They have to frequently dye their hair since they can easily be recognized by just their blonde hair and facial features, which is also why Monoma and Toga wear color contacts. Aoyama doesn’t need them since he wore different colored contacts when he became a student at UA, so there’s no need for them since everyone remembered him to have the color contact eyes instead of his natural green eyes.

They all will work multiple part time jobs to keep up with their rent and budget etc. However there are times where they will all quit to just take time to themselves. They all live together in the same apartment. Everyone also thinks they are dead, so there’s no need for them to really hide, but they’re too traumatized by heroes and their peers(hero students) to not stay in the hidden parts of towns and cities and lowkey jobs. There’s more to that on the “trial” I imagined for them (I dropped the manga some time ago but I heard that my baby Aoyama may POSSIBLY get actual time in prison for his affiliation and that was the forefront of the idea I came up with that they would all go through a trial process as they are still just children)

ALSO, in my AU Aoyama ends up with Dark shadow at some point (don’t question it I’m still trying to figure out how to fit it in so it makes sense👩🏽‍🦯, but they sort of form a bond and Dark Shadow develops depression after his “death”. He does go back to Tokoyami at some point after Aoyama realizes that Toko must be in ruins not having his best bud anymore and ‘gives’ him back?

I also mentioned that this is AFTER the “quirk war” I’m not sure if they actually use that title but from what I remember they distinctly called it that when I last read the manga. I could be wrong though.

One last thing, idk how the whole Oboro thing would work out, since he can use his quirk on command in this(hence the lack of purple mist) but technically he IS dead canonically….LIKE FRFR. Bro ain’t coming back and his body was just harvested and being used, but ignore that for this……he was just in a deep slumber and awoke after breaking out of the high security quirk prison he was in and decided to take care of the three because he would’ve wanted someone to do the same for him when he was younger and “died”.😫🖤

I know I write a lot so I highly doubt anyone read all of this😅but it’s so hard to JUST post my art and NOT WRITE ANYTHING since they all spawn from these ideas I get and I NEED to provide the context lmao Σ('◉⌓◉’)otherwise I feel wack that no one will ever know what I was aiming for lol🥲

[cxhleel108]

S7 Thots for this week: Why is everyone here actually delusional asf???

(Apologies for posting this late guys I was very tired when I started writing this…I was also high asf so be mindful of that while you read lol.)

• Oh great now #Raphne is going through shit and everyone’s gonna have to dedicate their whole life to fixing it!

• Bryson laying it on THICC this morning I know dats rightttt😛😛😛

• No seriously why ze fook are we helping them with their issues? I need these people to go back to university or wherever and take a communication course cuz y’all are clearly lacking.

• Tanya so messy for asking that. Girl you know exactly who tf it is why you lowkey telling on yourself like that?😭😭😭

• #Raphne is 100% completely done y’all omg! (Bullshit)

• NO YOU WILL NOT!

• Willow is STILL talking as if anybody give af about what she got to say. Someone get this woman a hobby I’m begginggggg.

• I love having bathing suits worth mentioning now😍

• Ain’t no way they tryna force a argument between me and my partner over this Raf and Daphne mess…bitch.

• WE DONT HAVE TO AGREE ON EVERY SINGLE THING TO BE IN SYNC THATS NOT HOW COUPLES OR HUMANS WORK!

• Talk less sir.

• Why is there always some of the girls trading jealous looks when it comes to this challenge. The point is to literally kiss everyone and y’all still be getting salty, get over it??? Maybe I’m just crazy but I would literally not care.

• Once again Willow is putting on a show for her imaginary friends and nobody in the real world is gagging.

• Wow, now all of a sudden we don’t know how to kiss each other properly because we couldn’t help another couple stop arguing over fucking sheets😕

• How am I having more chemistry with Raf than my own man? God help us.

• Omg Evan came back for me y'all😍😍😍😍😍

• Paying gems magically brings back chemistry to our couple I guess.

• Girl you deserve a 10 backwards.

• That joke bullshit…BOO! CORNY! LAME! 🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅

• Bryson real lucky he’s cute or I wouldn’t allow him to be acting like a 12 year old about his feelings.

• #Raphne is back together woohoo! (They’re literally gonna break it off again as soon as Daphne founds out bout Raf’s crush)

• Don't force me to have a moment with her ew! That ho is NOT my friend.

• There’s quite literally no reason to speak to everyone about the recoupling. NO REASON!

• Outfit time!🤩

• Eat! Eat! Eat!

• Thought Bryson was finna ask us to be his girlfriend right then and there ugh I need him to hurry up.

• CAN YOU ALL LEAVE US THE ABSOLUTE FUCK ALONE LIKE GODDAMN????

• Vicky if you can see how close me and Bryson are then why would you…never mind why even ask at this point.

• Bonnie has been trying to get with Tanya since the beginning of time. Girl just give up PLEASE.

• Girl who tf is you-

• Why did we get dressed up just to go speak to 3 people???????????? Chile anyways it’s outfit time AGAIN✨

• EAT! EAT! EAT!

• LMAOOOO she's such a loser I almost feel bad...almost.

• Uma you know good and well you meant to record them boys fighting. Fuck outta here with that excuse💀

• Y'all will not let Jake REST oh my goodness.

• Oooo y’all the way Bryson is fighting for us…kinda feeling butterflies in my stomach and elsewhere🤭🤭🤭

• Everyone here is so delusional when it comes to Tanya holy fuck. Actually no, this happens every season. Why do some of these people think that just because THEY feel a good connection with MC that automatically means she wants them? Like baby that’s not how this works…

• Oh Bryson don't end half of the villa like that-

• Daphne don’t ask me if I think you and yo man gon make it niece you don’t want my answer to that lmao.

• 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥂🥂🥂🥂🥂

• Why y’all ain’t make us do a surprise dumping so we could get Willow out? WHY IS SHE STILL HERE SHE LITERALLY HAS NOTHING TO CONTRIBUTE NOW????

• Oh I can tell you how! First, we're gonna walk in there and start marveling at every single thing in the room, specifically the bed, even though we've already been in there. Then, bet y'all won't see this coming, we're gonna find a box filled with naughty things😱😱😱 After that, we get to work and all that can be registered is the feeling of our partner's soft lips and how their hands caress our body in every place possible and then after a while we both reach our climax at the same time. Then our partner says they love us blah blah blah, we get some text about what's happening tomorrow and it's prolly the baby challenge or something equally stupid and ridiculous, and then we cuddle up and go to bed.

• If everything I just said is in next week's hideaway scene, everyone who likes this post owes me $10. I'm just playing, we all know everything I said is definitely happening. Keep your money💖

[dukeofdelirium]

Ain’t no way someone said that 💀 Are they threatening mj fans? Cause that sounds like a threat to me. Yes, I understand that some people aren’t convicted because of lack of evidence, but at that point, you have credibility and theirs is shot. Three out of five accusers only alleged touching, two of them alleged penetration 30 years after the fact, so too late to examine, it all goes back to credibility. Even the ones that only alleged touching have credibility problems. These guilters are so unhinged that their responses are straight up “I hope you get raped and there is no evidence so people call you a liar and money hungry.” These people are just projecting and they don’t even know it, or maybe they do and they don’t care.

They know they’re projecting, they’re the ones who are actual rapists and shit! They’re obsessed with the idea of MJ being guilty because they themselves are.

None of MJ’s accusers have credibility. There is no corroborating evidence. They all perjured themselves under oath, they’re proven extortionists and con artists. And that isn’t even mentioning the fact that half of the alleged molestation acts are VERIFIABLY false because it’s impossible for them to have happened… claims of being abused at certain locations, certain buildings, certain continents, certain award shows etc that we can PROVE either did not exist at the time, or that MJ was never at.

It isn’t just their credibility being shot to hell. It’s provably false alleged acts taking place that could in no way happen. It’s literally impossible.

They’re threatening MJ fans and saying they hope we get raped because that’s all they can do—lash out on us. Of course their freak asses would wish that on us. They’d probably like to do it themselves, sick bastards. How many guilters of MJ have been caught and convicted?

I’ll keep defending Michael and saying he’s innocent because he IS! And idc what freak loser comes into my inbox wishing the worst on me! They’ll never shut me up and I’ll keep putting them in their place!

[walder-138]

What does the word "friend" means to you?

Do you prefer to show affection first, or to receive affection first?

What are you searching for in people?

For Annika and Oz please!! <3 have a lovely day darl!

Hi Goose! I’m gonna have the asshole twins answer these questions for you!

Oz: “What do you mean? Someone who uh, is a buddy? Y’know, you watch the hockey game with ‘em, pop open a ice cold beer, and just, hangout y’know? You don’t gotta worry none ‘bout looking and acting all nice and fancy. You can just, y’know, be. And if it don’t feel like you can just BE around them, then they ain’t friends. Is that good enough?” (his dumbass doesn’t know 💀)

Annika: “Bitch, don’t you have a dictionary? I-“

*elbows her*

“Fuck was that for? Ohhhh you want the philosophical answer? Of course you do. Cheesy shit, I understand. A friend means someone who you will do anything for. Including, but not limited to violating restraining orders, torture, blackmail, and showing up to her house uninvited because SHE WON’T CALL ME BACK. IT’S BEEN 3 YEARS YELENA. YOU TOLD ME HE CHEATED ON YOU SO I LEFT HIS BEHEADED CORSPE ON YOUR PATIO. RETURN MY CALLS 😡🤬” (Maybe Adler did the right thing with this one 💀)

Next question:

Oz: “I guess I’d rather give then get. I don’t know, the feeling of someone’s hand on my cheek or sum’ reminds me how much I don’t deserve it. I’ve fucked up too many times to let myself have that love.” (Oz hates hugging from people he doesn’t know, but if it’s like his gf or Jenny dudebro will not let go. Like if they hugged him out of nowhere he WILL multitask. It doesn’t matter what he was doing beforehand. He’s the best hugger out there. I’m on the fence about giving him a girlfriend or anything cause it’s him, but I definitely wanna explore his love life sooner or later.)

Annika: “Neither, I’m not a pussy.” (Liar. Just LOOK AT HER. Annika loves being the center of somebody’s attention. She’s the biggest cuddlebug known to man. Annika definitely prefers receiving. She won’t admit it, but she LOVES laying on people. It’s the only time she shuts up. If some unfortunate woman had to share a bed with her, Annika’s gonna end up clinging onto her in her sleep. She’s definitely an affection-biter)

Next Question:

Oz: “I’m assuming you mean like in a romantic way. I don’t usually seek anyone. Same thing as last question, don’t feel like I’ve earned it yet. I’ve gotta get my head in shape, and I ain’t putin’ any ladies through my shit. Made that mistake with Jenny’s mom.

If I were normal? Definitely want someone good with kids. Jenny’s the only good thing I have in this world, and there ain’t no floozie bouta drive me apart from her. None of that “I hate kids” bullshit around me. People act like kids are different species. No, they just don’t give enough shits to actually listen to them. Also like me a woman who ain’t too shabby at sports, and can give me a run for my money.” (I should send him to therapy)

Annika: “What I search for in people is loyalty. I don’t care who you are, where you came from, but loyalty always overpowers everything else. If you can’t pledge loyalty to one cause, then why should I think you have my best interest in heart? At least if I disagree with you, I know you’re not a coward. The only thing worse than cowardice is treachery. If you conform with a group’s ideal, how do I know you think for yourself?” (girl can go from unhinged to well-spoken in seconds 💀)

[primaviva]

Your post felt like those really popular 2020 K-pop videos on YouTube that were like “my unpopular K-pop opinions part 1” 💀 anyways SAY IT ALREADY

BAHAHA THATS ACTUALLY SO TRUE STOP I REMEMBER THOSE anyway unpopular opinion time!!! 😁😁

okay but like y’all can’t hate me….i don’t want miles and gwen to end up together but i do at the same time and you gonna know what i mean

JUST STICK WITH ME PLEASE im not tryna sound like those delulu fans ada and leon type shi… where people don’t want someone to be together for themselves like NO not like that

it’s just like for a while i feel like every time a piece of media comes out even if it’s not popular there’s always a love interest and i feel like not every story has to be a love story or involve one. and what REALLY got me thinking this was how originally in itsv, gwen and miles were supposed to kiss before they went into the portal and i was like why? like i can see their chemistry in the first film but the story can go the same way even with them as friends and when i see that in movies I’m like “did they really have to be love interests?”

MORE SO it’s just like every time a girl and a guy are friends in a movie or show it just feels like they always put a romance between them and it’s like yes, it makes good writing. are gwen and miles cute together? yes the dynamic between them is so good. but did it NEED to happen? like i just wanna see a film where a male and a female can be strong companions without a hinted at romance.

and just ignoring how impractical them being in a relationship across dimensions would be and how my the mcu logic if they were to be in a dimension for too long it would be like nwh all over again…. it just would’ve been nice if they were friends that built off one another but because they been edging this romance for 4 years or sum now i would be HEATEDDDDD if miles and gwen didn’t get together. and i have a strong feeling that they are gonna kiss in btsv or at least gonna kiss each other goodbye if miles finally leaves the spiderverse alone but it’s like UGH

i feel like nobody is gonna agree but im just so tired of people behind these big movies always making the male friend and the female friend have romantic feelings like i feel like it feeds the stigma that boys can’t be friends with girls or it’s always gonna lead to something more. tbh it just feels so hard to find a genuine friendship in shows or any type of of media that don’t show any hints of romance like yes it’s very realistic for miles to have a crush on gwen and her back BUT SHOULD THEY BE ENDGAME?? LIKE IM NOT SO SURE

i saw this btsv theory i loved about how like they think beyond the spiderverse is linked to the reveal that there are other verses beyond the spiderverse (obvi miguel and them ain’t know that) that aren’t link to every spiderman variant and all that and how they think the movie is gonna end with all of them accepting that they can’t keep messing with the multiverse and miles is gonna learn to let go and just say goodbye to all of them and how that’s gonna be his sacrifice having to choose his universe over all the others he been yearning to see esp gwen and peter idk i ain’t gonna explain it all so iykyk imma have to find the video

i fekt crazy writing this idk if anyone feels the same but i feel like the romance was unnecessary AND HOW COME EVERY TIME A BLACK PERSON IS A LEAD IN SOMETHING MAINSTREAM THE LOVE INTEREST IS MOST OF THE TIMES A WHITE WOMAN that’s a rant for another time bro

[shit-talk-turner]

if she really cared, she would’ve filmed one of the shows where she had a better view. And she would’ve filmed more than 8 minutes and maybe on an actual camera or something. Or told zackery or Alex about it and gotten someone to professional film and maybe release it (not as a legit movie because the demand isn’t enough like Taylor Swift or Beyoncé to do that💀, but just on YouTube or something). She is dating the LEAD singer of the band, if she truly cared and that was her intent, she would’ve done way more. I ain’t gonna applaud her for filming 8 minutes of the show with a shitty view where she keeps screaming in the background every other minute. // So true! She really thinks she did something with this "generous" act. It feels more like a mockery to the fans. You can't even see and hear the band properly

^

[sooniebby]

i know i shouldn’t because you and me both want to just leave this discussion be and go about our lives but i cannot help but feel like everyone has misunderstood me-

when i said false hope, i didn’t mean it like you were trying to be “bad” intentionally or anything, i meant it more like people expecting their requests will be done, waiting, it not coming - when they could have just sent it to someone else who actually wanted to write it. nobody should feel pressure to do a request just because it was sent their way. :)

also, someone said that people forget writers have lives outside of tumblr? isn’t that what i said in my last one? because i fully agree with it - i shouldn’t have to agree cause it’s not an opinion, it’s a fact 💀

all i did was ask if it was gonna be done or not. that was all. im sorry if you felt that question was rude, i have asked that before to others and nobody seemed to mind. we all have different feels about stuff, so i get it. please just know that my intentions were NOTHING, but to know wether you were planning to do them or not.

I hope we’re good? and i also hope i didn’t cast the your bnha fans in a bad light, cause that’s not even what i look forward to the most with what you have planned

either way! let’s leave this be, it was a misunderstanding and that’s really all :^

False hope is still crazy tho… cuz I just got back into writing for anime and all the bnha requests I’ve gotten are brand new, from this month

It’s not like it’s been months or something 💀

In any case, everyone is different, some might not find the question rude but I’m not them—just like they aren’t me. I found it rude, even if you weren’t intending to be.

It’s really came down to the way you asked the question—that’s all there is to it. Cuz you can have a non rude question in theory and it can still come off as rude no matter your original intention.

Also, just one thing to keep in mind, don’t say “I’m sorry if you…” in an apology lolol—cuz it ain’t if, i did feel that way

That should be the end of it <3 water under the bridge

[ataraxy1]

What Sports the Hashira Would Do !!

Characters: Muichiro, Mitsuri, Rengoku, Obanai, Tengen, Giyuu, Shinobu, Sanemi (No Gyomei soz)

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

CW: Strong language, maybe a suggestive joke or two, very minor spoiler puns

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

Giyuu ☆〜（ゝ。∂）

➶ I’m getting baseball kid vibes

➶ If that doesn’t rock with you then probs swimming

➶ But for now, let’s go with baseball

➶ An apparently unpopular kid playing a popular sport?

➶ It just goes hand-in-hand

➶ (Post Giyuu infinity castle arc pun intended)

➶ But srsly he sure can hit a home run

➶ The ball is flying, the crowds cheering, Giyuu forgets to run

➶ It’s not his fault

➶ ‘lil boi got flustered

➶ When he does run though, HE MAKES UP FOR IT

➶ Bro gobbles that game up and doesn’t even leave the plate

➶ He’s so humble about it too

➶ “You did so well, Giyuu!”

➶ “Thanks :|”

➶ Not a thought behind those eyes

➶ Honestly his team is patting him on the back

➶ And he’s standing there likes he’s getting assaulted 😭

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

Shinobu ☆〜（ゝ。∂）

✾ Ohhh she’s such a volleyball girl

✾ And she’s mainly in it so she can strike a ball in someone’s face

✾ It’s a coping mechanism

✾ As for the position she’d play

✾ I reckon she’s a setter

✾ She’s calculating and doesn’t need to run as much as a libero

✾ She’s small though so she needs to make up for her height in aiming skills

✾ It’s a blessing and a curse

✾ Just pray her eye doesn’t twitch while she’s aiming for you

✾ Because you ain’t catching the ball with your hands

✾ She’s so calm and collected during a game though

✾ SHE MAKES VOLLEYBALL LOOK SO EASY 💀

✾ You know what I mean?

✾ She receives a pass so neatly?

✾ And it lightly flys over the net with grace

✾ She was a fairy

✾ She also hates the boys’ team

✾ No one knows why

✾ No one even knows tbh

✾ She just doesn’t like them

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

Rengoku ☆〜（ゝ。∂）

҉ He’s definitely a soccer bro

҉ You know those players that get their shoulder bumped

҉ And then act like their whole arm flew off

҉ Kyojuro soooo calls them out on their bs

҉ “Stop being dramatic and get up my friend!”

҉ (Zenitsu was the one on the ground)

҉ He’s also such a team player

҉ It’s actually scientifically proven that it’s impossible to hate Kyojuro

҉ My scrumptious, gorgalicious, pumpkin vroom vroom

҉ Sorry, I need to compose myself

҉ The definition of good sportsmanship?

҉ Literally stapled onto his forehead

҉ Someone made a foul play?

҉ He will NOT hesitate to tell the umpire

҉ And when he’s on the field

҉ He would do cool spins to avoid the opposing team

҉ Like the guys who make soccer edits with their 100% rsmb, over-sharpened “4K topaz like quality”, and blinding saturation would make edits of his spins

҉ I am in wuv

҉ AND WHEN ITS A DRINK BREAK??

҉ He’s shooting the water into his mouth, wiping his forehead while patting a team member on the back and pushing some hair strands back

҉ Literal orgasm on the spot

҉ Who do you think is my favourite hashira btw

҉ Personally, I would guess gyomei

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

Mitsuri ☆〜（ゝ。∂）

❥ I literally cannot see her as anything but a netball girl

❥ I was about to put gymnastics bc netball isn’t common in the Japanese culture

❥ But then I thought that would be too predictable and boring

❥ Story is, she saw the netball team dresses and wrote her name on the signup sheet so fast

❥ You could literally see smoke rising from the page

❥ Looked like a damn carnival with all those flying sparks

❥ But she 100% brings her effort to the table

❥ And she outshines EVERYONE

❥ Her team is doing laps for stamina building and while they’re all perishing in the back

❥ Mitsuri over here is skipping along her merry fucking way

❥ She’s tougher than your average person and any doubt about it was demolished as soon as she began sports

❥ As for the position she plays

❥ It’s obvious, no?

❥ Bench warmer

❥ Lmfao jk she’s such a strong centre

❥ Running around the court

❥ Receiving those passes with a “Thank you!”

❥ Every time someone made a good shot (her team or not) she would yell “Do it again!”

❥ Literally everyone that see’s her on the opposing team doesn’t know whether to thank the heavens or cry at their sealed, unfortunate fate

❥ But everyone loves her either way

❥ Her and Kyojuro are sooooo similar in this regard

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

Obanai ☆〜（ゝ。∂）

୭ Let me just

୭ Let me think for a sec

୭ Yeah he’s not spilling his secrets to me today

୭ Golf? 😭

୭ I was thinking “I’ll cross this bridge when I get to it”

୭ And now I’m here

୭ What do I do

୭ Let’s just stick with golf for the sake of my word count

୭ He fr chose golf because of it being a no contact sport

୭ And because it was a quiet one too

୭ He’s such a grandpa

୭ People start clapping when he does a good putt and he just goes “>:(“

୭ He cannot STAND people watching him play

୭ He just wants to be one with the club

୭ Like Shinobu, he has a really good eye for aim

୭ I’ll bet sm money on the fact that he’ll have a little snake embroidered onto his polo-shirts chest pocket

୭ I mean, this guy can go for 3 days without eating (canon), he’s bound to have some money saved up for smth like that

୭ Ok my creativity is at its limit with this one

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

Sanemi ☆〜（ゝ。∂）

༄ؘ BASKETBALL

༄ؘ I cannot be convinced of anything else (ok maybe track)

༄ؘ Take a moment to imagine this

༄ؘ It’s pre-game

༄ؘ He’s in his jersey

༄ؘ Biceps out for all to see

༄ؘ And he’s casually bouncing a ball to occupy himself

༄ؘ Are we on the same page??

༄ؘ Are you drooling bc I am

༄ؘ AND WHEN HE’S IN GAME??

༄ؘ He’s dodging, shooting and passing like a pro

༄ؘ He’s so quick and sharp with his movements

༄ؘ The other team just can’t catch him

༄ؘ But watch whatever you can

༄ؘ Because he won’t be on the court for long 💀

༄ؘ He has the patience of a gecko

༄ؘ The second someone does something to trigger him

༄ؘ He is off the walls

༄ؘ And now off the court

༄ؘ Now he’s just sitting on the bench like a child being put in the naughty corner 😭

༄ؘ I’m getting secondhand embarrassment for some reason oml

༄ؘ But it’s okay because the second he starts wiping the sweat on his face with his shirt???

༄ؘ Literal washboard abs I’m telling you

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

Muichiro ☆〜（ゝ。∂）

✧ Mr. Prodigy over here is definitely a karate kid

✧ Will kick your ass

✧ Srsly though if you pick on him

✧ Your friend will be the floor for the next 5 hours that you’re out cold for

✧ He’s disciplined in mind and soul

✧ Even if he’s a little butthole sometimes

✧ His teachers see his fast progress

✧ And waste no time in utilising his talent

✧ He got moved up to the class for 16 year olds

✧ Mainly so he would stop rocking his classmates shit

✧ His brother picks on him less these days

✧ Wonder why

✧ あら あら~

✧ All the girls swoon

✧ He has a little fan club perched in the stands at his comps

✧ They’re like crows when they see shiny things

✧ “IT’S MINE IT’S MINE FUCK OFF”

✧ Smth with that vibe

✧ The way he smashes through the wood with his kick is honestly scary

✧ Terrifying

✧ You do NOT want to be on the receiving end of his kicks

✧ Bc the next time you open your eyes, you’re having an out of body experience

✧ Literally watching your body from the heavens

✧ Rest in peace ‼️

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

Tengen ☆〜（ゝ。∂）

♛ He has 3 girlfriends

♛ Need I say more?

♛ Well if that’s not enough of a sport

♛ Idk whether to say wrestling or illegal boxing

♛ Let’s go with wrestling because he’s got da muscles

♛ Illegal boxing happens ONLY when he finishes his homework

♛ He’s disciplined

♛ Anyways

♛ Gym

♛ Swimming pool

♛ The vet

♛ There isn’t a place you won’t see him working on his body

♛ He thinks of his body to be his personal shrine

♛ So wrestling helps to tone

♛ And harden

♛ And grow

♛ And

♛ Omg excuse me

♛ He does things to me it’s not my fault

♛ Anyways

♛ Imagine a gym bro with protein shakes and stuff

♛ That IS him

♛ In his matches, there’s girls with banners, boys with megaphones, teachers with hair falling out to keep everyone under control

♛ Bro milks the celebrity treatment as if it will never happen again

♛ He really lives up to it though

♛ He walks into the ring with the medal already around his neck

♛ His opponents always think that he’ll be slower because he’s got more heavy muscles

♛ Literally setting themselves up for failure with that mindset

♛ He whoops their ass

♛ Bulldozers them

♛ The crowds cheering

♛ His girlfriends are clapping

♛ The guy beneath him passes out

♛ All is well in the world of Tengen

[winwintea]

this is all too much like yes who the fuck is taeil but in the same time bro i just feels shocked disgusted and all by the situation😭😭

like i don’t support him and maybe i’m a but netrual about the whole situation

because like i used to love him and he was a bug person in my life and he was such a comforting person now he is a disgusting monster in the same time but a part of me really hopes this shit is not true and i sound dumb right now

why did i actually see it coming like no seriously i felt there will be a big crime scandal in kpop soon and it really happened but now i feel very shocked

i just really can’t take in the situation because ain’t no way someone who i actually saw as a comfort in my life does such an evil thing like this

i just hope the victim is really doing okay and gets justice as soon as possible

but this whole thing is so big and i feel like you are an older sibling to me who i can talk to when i feel something

and honestly the victim must be so traumatized i remember when the same thing happened to me of course my situation isn’t as bad as this i’m talking about how the victim felt very idk i can’t really explain it because i don’t want to remember that shit time in my life

STARTED FEELING LIKE AN ATTENTION SEEKER I’M SORRY

i think what’s fucking with me wasn’t the fact that he was a comforting person to me. i mean in most groups you usually have your favs and your… less favorited members but you gotta support your group anyways and he falls under that category for me.

what’s fucking with me is the fact that as a nctzen, i’m going to have to live with this. lucas’s situation wasn’t as grave as this is, but i don’t think i thought about it at the time bc technically we lost sungchan, taro, and lucas at the same time and i kind of accepted that.

but taeil’s situation is crazy big. as someone who’s also a big exo-l, i currently feel the same way that i felt when the kris wu situation happened. kris also wasn’t in my favs list, but i did have a commitment to the group. and although exo is different than nct in so many ways, there are also so many similarities i just feel equally or even worse. (which is lowkey the reason why ive been inactive/active randomly bc i just can’t.)

don’t worry my dear though haha, we’ll trauma dump and bond together no worries 😍😍 (i was gr**med too 💀💀🤗🤗🤗 the internet is a very fun place 💀)

ur not an attention speaker girl i get you <33