#(...I know I'm gonna hate tagging that later)

[menagerofmischief]

shrimp cocktail, cold appetizer, lobster, coca-cola, yes dessert, served by oscar piastri

Dia's Diner Menu

shrimp cocktail rivals to lovers cold appetizer rough sex lobster "I love watching my cum leak out of your pussy" coca-cola somnophillia dessert aftercare

Oscar Piastri x Ferrari!driver!reader

TW: one bed trope, unprotected sex (wrap you willy please), sleep dry humping

WC: 2k

A/N: I enjoyed writing this one a lot. Also I wanted to say I'm so thankful to all of you that sent requests and that I can't wait to write all of them but you'll maybe have to be patient with me because I'm a student and am pretty busy with school. I hope y'all are gonna enjoy this one.

Some bigger force, God or karma or fate or whatever else there is, was definitely out to get me. Because this had to be the worst fucking night of my life. I’m not being dramatic when I say that.

Why was this the worst night of my life?

We just made it to Singapore for the upcoming Grand Prix and went straight to our hotel. The whole grid was staying at the same place since it made things more convenient. I go up to the reception to check in and get the key to my room, all but ready to collapse into the mattress and sleep the jet lag off. 

“I’m so sorry Miss,” the receptionist says, tapping her fingers against the keyboard, glancing up at me every few seconds. Finally she looks up, her expression apologetic. “It seems there was a mistake with the booking and we double booked your room.”

I fight off the urge to groan and roll my eyes, instead plastering a smile on my face. “It’s fine, it’s not that big of a deal. Just put me in whatever room is available.”

She makes a face, looking down at the computer again and then returning her gaze to mine. “I really am sorry but there are no other rooms available right now.”

Now I really did groan. “Fantastic. Can I know who the other person occupying the room will be?”

Before the receptionist had the chance to answer, my worst nightmare in human form came up to the desk, standing right next to me. “Hello. I’m here to check in - it’s under Oscar Piastri.”

The woman - I finally glanced at her name tag, seeing her name was Alice - looked between us, then down at the computer before looking at us again. “Sir, as I was just explaining to the lady here, the hotel double booked your room by accident.”

“It’s fine just put me in a -”

“There’s no available rooms.” I cut him off. “Just the one.”

Oscar looked at me, narrowing his eyes. McLaren’s golden boy, affectionately nicknamed ‘the polite cat’ by the fans was the biggest thorn in my side for a long while now. Everything started back in F2 with our on track rivalry which grew with each race. Then I signed into F1, fulfilling my childhood dreams of racing in red and thought I escaped him. I thought too soon apparently because after my announcement post, his followed soon and I was once again back on track with him.

Did I have a reason to hate him? Absolutely! Was it awfully petty and possibly over-dramatic? Very likely. It was my first race in F2, I was about to finish P2 it was amazing. Then he crashed into me and drove us both into the wall, causing us both to DNF and lose out on a podium.

We have hated each other ever since.

“It’s okay - we’ll share.” Oscar’s voice brought me out of my thoughts, quickly turning my head to look at him.

“What!?”

Oscar took the key from Alice and dangled it in front of me, a smirk on his face. “I said we’re gonna be bunking.” He pulled the handle of his suitcase, “Come on then, Y/n”

✿ ✿ ✿

“You stay on your side of the room,” I said, putting the chair in the middle of the room to make it a half marker. “And I’ll stay on mine.” The one queen size bed would definitely be a problem as well, but one I would mention later.

“And how are you gonna go the bathroom since it’s on my side?” He asked, his voice holding a teasing tone.

“Bathroom if free ground, hallway too” I stated, crossing my arms over my chest.

Oscar’s gaze dropped down, stayed for a few seconds and then his eyes met mine again. He hummed, “And if I wanna open the window then what? Since it’s on your side.”

“Don’t act smart,” I told him. “It doesn’t suit you.”

“You wound me!” He gasped, pressing a hand over his heart.

“Shame it’s not fatal.”

✿ ✿ ✿

This was definitely the weirdest night of my life.

With only one bed in the room, no couch and neither of us willing to put our body in uncomfortable positions sleeping on the chair or on the floor, night before practice - Oscar and I made an agreement to share the bed.

One of the extra blankets from the closet was bunched up and put down the middle of the bed separating the two us. Not that it served much purpose considering that it was kicked down and off the bed while we were sleeping.

I woke up, rubbing my eyes to adjust to the dark and then I felt it. The slow, yet desperately feral rolls, the pressure and the pleasure. I had to press a hand against my mouth to stop myself from moaning, taking in deep harsh breaths through my nose.

I came to a realization about three things, so goes:

Oscar had moved a bigger part of his body onto my side of the bed.

He had pulled me close and caged me in his arms sometimes during the night.

He was grinding his very much hard cock into me -  in his sleep.

My cheeks were on fire and it felt like the rest of my body was too. The pajamas, which I purposely picked out because of how light they were, felt suffocating now.

I didn’t even realize what I was doing until it was done, my body moving on its own. One leg pushing slightly forward, opening just enough space for Oscar’s hips to chase mine and my ass slowly barely grinding back into him.

I was enjoying this much more than I should have and it was wrong. God, it was so wrong. But when his erection was rubbing so perfectly against me, I couldn’t bring myself to care.

I was wet, I knew I was. I could feel how soaked my panties had gotten and the uncomfortable feel of my slick underwear did not escape me. As the pressure increased I couldn’t help but let out a moan.

The noise felt deafening in the silent room and my eyes widened. Oscar’s body stilled and my breath caught in my throat, the dread of having woken him with my moans taking over me.

A moment passed, two moments passed. Then Oscar’s hands tightened around my body, pulling me even closer to him, my ass pressed just against the outline of his dick. One of his hands moved down my stomach, dipping into the waistband of my sleeping shorts and going straight down into my panties.

He ran a finger through my folds, coating it in my slick and it took everything in me not to moan. “You’re fucking dripping,” his voice in my ear made me freeze. Awake afterall. “This wet from me humping you? And here I thought you hated me.”

The pad of his finger touched my clit, a gasp falling from my lips at the pleasurable feeling. “Did you enjoy me rutting into you while I was sleeping, you dirty dirty girl?” He added more pressure, rubbing circles on my clit and this time I didn’t hold my moans back. “Woke up halfway through, when you started grinding your ass on me like a bitch in heat. You seemed so into it, I thought I’d just keep going.”

“Wasn’t,” I whispered.

“What was that?” He growled into my ear.

“Wasn’t grinding on you,” I said, through gritted teeth.

His fingers pinched my clit and my whole body surged forward, mouth falling open to let out a loud moan. “Don’t lie,” he said, the tone of his voice leaving no room for argument.

“Fuck you.”

“Oh don’t worry sweetheart, you will.”

Oscar pulled his fingers out of my panties, making me whine at the loss of friction on my clit. His chuckle vibrated through the room. He got up onto his knees on the bed, arms coming forward to grab my shoulders, and pulled me roughly so I was laying on my back.

I couldn’t help but look at him above me. His eyes were full of lust, pupils blown wide and cheeks red. As much as I didn’t want to admit it to myself, he looked absolutely ethereal. 

“Tell me to stop,” he said, fingers hooking into the waistband of my sleeping shorts.

I held his gaze, a shaky breath falling from my mouth. “Don’t stop.”

In one move he pulled down both my shorts and my panties, throwing them behind him without a care. Then he took off his own shorts, followed by his boxers - that ended up being thrown somewhere too. He pulled me up enough to take my top off, and then pushed me down again, leaving me completely bare. 

Oscar leaned over me, his mouth drawn in a smirk, his breath hot on my face. “Tell me not to kiss you.”

“Kiss me,” I whispered. He didn’t waste a second, as soon as the words were out of my mouth he was surging forward, his lips pressing harshly against mine, tongue pushing into my mouth. He pulled slightly back, my lip caught before his teeth and he gently bit down, making me whine into his mouth.

“Fuck me,” I panted into his mouth. “Please just -”

I didn’t get to finish what I was saying as he pushed himself into me fully in one go, making me scream. His hand pressed against my mouth, muffling the noises I was making. “Do you want to wake the whole hotel up?” He asked as he began thrusting, pulling himself out until only the tic was still in me and then forcefully pushing back in again. “Some people came here to sleep, not to listen to you moaning like a whore on my cock.”

His other hand went between us to rub my clit. I was practically sobbing as he worked his fingers in fast circles around my clit while roughly thrusting into me. My vision was blurred with tears that were spilling from the corners on my eyes.

Oscar’s hand moved only a little, leaving room for me to speak but close enough for my lips to brush against his palm with each word. “Cum,” I babbled. “Gonna cum! Oscar, please!”

“Yeah?” He asked, his voice hoarse. “Gonna cum for me like a good little slut? Go on then - cum”

I came with a moan, wrapping my legs around his waist and caging him in. Oscar fucked me trough my orgasm, his own following. He twitched inside of me before cumming, painting my walls and making me whine at how full I felt.

He pulled out of me slowly and went to the bathroom to clean himself up. After a moment he returned with a wet, probably warm, towel in his hands. He kneeled on the bed and gently spread my legs with his hands.

“Fuck,” Oscar groaned. “I love watching my cum leak out of your pussy.” His fingers dipped to collect some of his cum which had spilled out of me and was slowly dripping towards my ass, and pushed it back into me, causing me to gasp.

He leaned forward and placed a kiss on my forehead and somehow my cheeks burned ever hotter. After he gently cleaned me up and terrorized me to drink water, he laid down in bed next to me and pulled my body into his, arms wrapping around me.

“Are you finally going to let me take you out to dinner?” He asked, his voice husky and breath hot against the side of my face.

I hummed, my eyes barely open and already feeling sleepy. “Don’t crash into me while I’m winning on Sunday and we’ll see.”

“That was one time!”

I chuckled, placing my hands over his hand on my stomach. “Yeah, I’ll let you take me out to dinner.”

Believe it or not this might have actually turned out to be one of the best nights of my life.

[glitchychara]

Amnesia

Tyler One Shot, 3,384 words

I really hate puzzles. It's weird, because I'm more of a problem solving girl, but puzzles just piss me off for some reason. I hate TVs too. I don't know what it is about them, but they just bug me. Mario's always watching some stupid thing on the TV, which kinda makes me wanna smash it to pieces with a hammer. Again, it makes no sense to me since I don't mind playing video games with them, even when I keep losing to everyone because I've never played before. It's just the TV in general, I guess. Although I recently learned my biggest trigger is TV static. I don't know why, but I get weird flashbacks everytime I hear it. Even though it was only once since I've been here. I started seeing images and they filled up my head and I didn't know what was going on and then someone reached out and I couldn't see who it was so I swung but it turned out to be Meggy so she blocked me and she asked me if I was okay and then-

And then I got up. And I left. And I came back a few hours later. And they never brought it up. Nor have I heard any TV static since. 

But anyways, Meggy and Smg4 took me to the doctor yesterday, which I don't know why a centaur would wanna be in the medical field, nor did I trust the guy, but at least he was gonna tell me exactly what was wrong with me….until he gave me my doctors note and it was literally a scribble. Like, excuse me sir, what the HELL is this supposed to be? Chicken scratch?? Anyways I gave it to the axolotl looking guy who was working at the pharmacy and somehow HE KNEW WHAT IT SAID?? I swear I'll NEVER understand doctors. Anyways, he gave me this bottle of pills and sent me on my merry way. Guess who STILL doesn't know what's wrong with her? Me :). So I figured I'd Google what the pills were for and guess what? Apparently I have something called “Amnesia” which, according to Google, means “permanent or temporary memory loss.” 

Huh??

add “doctors” and “pharmacists” to the list of things I hate.

I talked to Three recently, and he asked me if I was going to get my own house. I told him I didn't plan too. “Why not?” he asked, stacking cups next to the coffee machine. I shrugged and continued my task-cleaning out the new pastry display. “Smg4 lets me live in his guest room for free. Why would I wanna pay for a house?” He laughed and asked if I wanted to live with him forever. “Well, not forever, obviously. Just until I go home.” I replied, now adding pastries to the display case. “Tyler. About that…” I turned and looked at him, confused. It was the first time I've ever seen him look sad. “Tyler, you don't even know where you're from. How do you plan on getting home if you can't remember how you got here? Might as well get used to living in the Mushroom Kingdom, you know.” I rolled my eyes and ignored him. What would he know? I'm completely fine living in the castle. It's not like Smg4 does much anyways, other than making videos. Which he should make better, by the way. I mean, he lacks creativity, and a story in general. The whole point of making something is to entertain your audience. How is he going to do that if he's so focused on his “it doesn't have to be perfect” bs? I swear, some people don't deserve their fame, or money, or power or reviews or stars. 

5. stars.

What am I saying? I don't know anything about true art. I've never even made anything myself. Maybe those doctors were right.

Damn Amnesia…

(tagging @its-a-me-mango and @psychologistlemon bc I thought you guys being the doctor/pharmacist was funny)

[ghastigiggles]

IN THE MOST LIKE. /nm /npa WAY, PLEASE DO NOT TAKE THIS WRONG OR NEGATIVELY

I’ve noticed that you tend to like …. ask us if it’s okay to do certain things? and like, that’s totally fine and acceptable, but … like. this is YOUR blog, it is whatever you want it to be, you can post whatever, and if people don’t like that then they can just ….. idk, unfollow lol?

if you want to keep a following, sure, then you are 100% free to do what makes you believe you will keep it, HOWEVER if you don’t mind, then you can just do what you want, right ?

you’re not here to entertain anybody if you don’t want to. it’s always your choice to make, and you deserve to have it

ah but you misunderstand. my self-worth is directly tied to the validation of whether people recieve my products well or not! /hj

[platoapproved]

first Marius mention in the series and I'm already hissing like an angry cat

[this-machine-runs-on-coffee]

"DEAD GAY SON" THIS IS NOT AN EXACT TRANSLATION, THIS IS AN ADAPTATION (AND ONE THAT STILL NEEDS TONS OF FIXING AT THAT)

Now, you're seeing the word "Dead" for the third time in my adapted songs. Am I obsessed with death? No, JD is, that's why it's there. I should also say I don't really like how this one came out, but I had to give you something in theme with pride month, even though this song isn't exactly the best (and I'm sorry for that but I would've had to adapt this song eventually and idk how but many people seem to find this song funny on YouTube so here you are). I should specify I could do way better with other songs and that I dislike how this one came out but it's very close to the original meaning (IMO) so here you have it, "Dead Gay Son". I'm also sorry for keeping the slur, but it was in the original song and adapting songs is (at least for me) keeping them as close as possible to the original meaning while keeping them singable. Also I fucked up the syllables and rhymes so bad

ASK ME FOR PERMISSION BEFORE USING THIS, DO CREDIT ME IF YOU EVER USE THIS (I doubt you will it’s impractical and still needs so much fixing it’s unbelievable) AND TELL ME/LINK WHATEVER YOU USED IT FOR USING REBLOGS (because for some reason Tumblr doesn’t like comments with links and while I do think I understand why I don’t always like it)

(the apostrophes [or however ’ is called] are used to shorten the number of syllables often in poetry so I’m obviously abusing that power.)

[PAPÀ DI RAM, parlato] Aspetta solo un minuto, Paul! È parlare in modo ignorante e odioso come fai tu che rende questo un posto che i nostri ragazzi non sopportavano!

(cantato) Non erano sconci! Non era una svistina! Eran due versi solitari Nella grande canzone divina!

[PAPÀ DI KURT, parlato] I nostri figli erano finocchi, Bill!

[PAPÀ DI RAM] Sì! Mio figli'è un omosessuale E di questo non mi vergognerei— Voglio che il mondo sappia... Amo il mio morto figlio gay!

(parlato) Sono stato a pensare. Pregare. Leggere un po' di riviste. Ed è tempo di aprire le nostre menti!

(cantato) Beh, il buon Dio l'universo ha fatto Dio ha creato l'umanità E penso che sia parte del suo piano nella sua immensità So che Dio ha una ragione Per ogni oceano ed ogni goccia E perché ha deciso di lasciar i ragazzi farsi nella doccia! Non erano sconci— Non erano animali! Eran due lacci isolati nei divini stivali! Non m'è mai'mportato tanto di gay ma ora me ne interesserei

[PAPÀ DI RAM & CONGREGAZIONE] E ora ho imparato ad amare…

[PAPÀ DI RAM] Amo il mio morto figlio gay!

[CONGREGAZIONE] Ama suo figlio Ama suo figlio Il suo morto gay figlio!

[PAPÀ DI RAM] Ora, dico che mio figli'è in Paradiso! E che s'abbronza in piscina Il cherubino cammina con loro e, Gesù dice ch'è 'na cosa carina! Non hanno crimini o odio, non ci sono bigottismo o'nsulti - Solo persone amichevoli vestite come i loro compaesani preferiti! Non erano sconci—

[CONGREGAZIONE] No, no!

[PAPÀ DI RAM] Si sentivano rimossi!

[CONGREGAZIONE] Whoa!

[PAPÀ DI RAM] Nei lunghi capelli di Dio eran due elastici rossi Prima quando vedevo un gay avrei detto "Gli sparerei"

[PAPÀ DI RAM & CONGREGAZIONE] Ma ora ho imparato ad amare…

[PAPÀ DI RAM] E per di più! Quei due, eran coraggiosissimi! Quei due, ne erano coscientissimi! Quelli li avrebbero giudicati, eran disperati d'esser liberi! Si son comportati da ribelli, nudi quasi ai gioielli! Paul, non posso credere Che continui a rifiutar di capire Quest'è quel che eravam destinat'a fare—

(parlato) Parlo di me e te! Nell'estate dell'83!

[PAPÀ DI KURT, parlato] Quello è stato un viaggio particolare

[CONGREGAZIONE] Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa Whoa, whoa, whoa! Non erano sconci— No! E non solo una percossa— No, no! Erano dello strass Sulla divina borsa!

[ENTRAMBI I PAPÀ] Il nostro lavoro è di fare quel che da tempo pensavo: "Lo farei"!

[CONGREGAZIONE] Perché ora amiamo, amiamo, amiamo Amiamo i vostri—

[PAPÀ DI RAM] Sono sù là al battito delle ali angeliche a ballar!

[PAPÀ DI KURT] Un compagno prendono…

[PAPÀ DI RAM] Verso l'un l'altro si tendono—

[ENTRAMBI I PAPÀ] Mentre Judy Garland sta a cantar!

[PAPÀ DI RAM] Vivono una seconda vita spensierata e spericolata!

[PAPÀ DI KURT] Si dondolan sul cancello incastonato—

[ENTRAMBI I PAPÀ & CONGREGAZIONE] E hanno una collana incastonata!

[CONGREGAZIONE] Whoo!

[ENTRAMBI I PAPÀ] Non erano sconci!

[CONGREGAZIONE] No!

[ENTRAMBI I PAPÀ & CONGREGAZIONE] Eran bravi uomini! E ora son felici cuccioli nella tana dei divini!

[ENTRAMBI I PAPÀ] Andate avanti e amatevi ora Come avrebbe fatto mio figlio Insegneremo al mond'ad amar...

[CONGREGAZIONE] Al mond'ad amar...

[TUTTI] Al mond'ad amar...

[ENTRAMBI I PAPÀ sovrapponendosi con la congregazione] Amo il mio morto gay figlio! Mio figlio! Mio figlio!

[CONGREGAZIONE] Non tanto male, il tuo morto figlio gay! Vorrei aver il tuo morto figlio gay! Grazie, papà, per il tuo...

[ENTRAMBI I PAPÀ & CONGREGAZIONE] Morto! Figlio! Gay!

So, direct translation! (used in this to specify the meanings and explain certain word choices)

[RAM'S DAD, spoken] You wait just a minute, Paul! It is this ignorant, hateful way of talking like yours that makes this world a place our boys could not tolerate!

(sung) They were not dirty(but as in filthy/indecent)! It (I mean as in their "love" but can't find a way to specify it) wasn't a small oversight! They were two lonely verses In the great divine(/heavenly? I don't really know how to translate that but it's as in God's/Heaven's) song!

[KURT'S DAD, spoken] Our sons were pansies, Bill!

[RAM'S DAD] Yes! My son's a homosexual And of that I wouldn't be ashamed (for the rhyme)— I want the world to know... I love my dead gay(those two got inverted [gay and son])son!

(spoken) I've remained to think. To pray. To read some magazines. And it's time we opened our minds!

(sung) Well, the good Lord made the universe The Lord created humanity And I believe it's all a part of his plan in its immensity I know God has a reason For each ocean and drop And why he chose to let our boys do each other in the shower! They were not dirty(/filthy/indecent)— They were not animals (it fit for the rhyme)! They were just two stray laces in the divine(/Heaven's/the Lord's) big boots Well, I never cared for homos much but now I would be interested [RAM’S DAD & CONGREGATION] And now I've learned to love…

[RAM’S DAD] I love my dead gay(inverted in this part [son and gay])son!

[CONGREGATION] He loves his son He loves his son His dead gay son!

[RAM'S DAD] Now, I say my boy's in Heaven! And he's tanning by the pool The cherubim walks with them, and Jesus says it's cute! They don't have crime or hatred, there's no bigotry or insults - Just friendly fellows dressed up like their fav'rite fellow village Person! They were not dirty(filthy/indecent)—

[CONGREGATION] No, no!

[RAM’S DAD] They felt removed (for the rhyme)!

[CONGREGATION] Whoa!

[RAM’S DAD] They were two bright red rubberbands in God's long hair Before(,) when I saw a homo(/gay) I would've said "I'd shoot him" [RAM’S DAD & CONGREGATION] But now I've learned to love…

[RAM’S DAD] And furthermore! These boys were very brave! These boys , they were very conscient of it! Those folks would judge 'em, they were desperate to be free! They behaved like rebels, stripped almost to their jewels(/balls/testicles)! Paul, I can't believe That you keep on refusing to understand This is what we were meant to be doing—

(spoken) I'm talkin’ you and me! In the summer of '83!

[KURT'S DAD, spoken] That was one particular trip

[CONGREGATION] Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa Whoa, whoa, whoa! They were not dirty(/filthy/indecent)— No! And not only a hit (because they were bullies and hit people and that's what they were recognised from? Would that make sense?)— No, no! (Damn ok thanks for the confirmation) They were rhinestones On the divine(/Heaven's/God's) purse!

[BOTH DADS] Our job is now doing what for long I thought: "I'd do this"! [CONGREGATION] 'Cause now we love, love, love! We love your dead—

[RAM’S DAD] They're up there disco dancing to the thump of angel wings!

[KURT’S DAD] They grab a mate…

[RAM’S DAD] And lean(more like tend/stretch) toward each other—

[BOTH DADS] While Judy Garland is singing!

[RAM’S DAD] They live a second life that's fancy-free and reckless!

[KURT'S DAD] They swing upon the gates with gemstones set inside them—

[BOTH DADS & CONGREGATION] And wear a necklace with gemstones set inside it!

[CONGREGATION] Whoo!

[BOTH DADS] They were not dirty(/filthy/indecent)!

[CONGREGATION] No!

[BOTH DADS & CONGREGATION] They were good men! And now they're happy cubs in the Gods' (yup the apostrophe placing is intentional and not a mistake, that's what I mean, I'm hinting at the trinity) den!

[BOTH DADS] Go forth and love each other now Like my boy would have done We'll teach the world to love...

[CONGREGATION] The world to love...

[ALL] The world to love...

[BOTH DADS overlapping with congregation] I love my dead gay son! My son! My son!

[CONGREGATION] Not half bad, your dead gay son! Wish I had your dead gay son! Thank you, dad, for your...

[BOTH DADS & CONGREGATION] Dead! Gay! Son! OG LYRICS (if you’re seeing this I doubt you don’t know them, but here they are anyway):

[RAM'S DAD, spoken] You wait just a minute, Paul! It is ignorant, hateful talk like yours that makes this world a place our boys could not live in!

(sung) They were not dirty! They were not wrong! They were two lonely verses In the Lord's great song!

[KURT'S DAD, spoken] Our boys were pansies, Bill!

[RAM'S DAD] Yes! My boy's a homosexual And that don't scare me none— I want the world to know... I love my dead gay son!

(spoken) I've been thinking. Praying. Reading some magazines. And it's time we opened our eyes!

(sung) Well, the good Lord made the universe The Lord created man And I believe it's all a part of his gigantic plan I know God has a reason For each mountain and each flower And why he chose to let our boys get busy in the shower! They were not dirty— They were not fruits! They were just two stray laces in the Lord's big boots Well, I never cared for homos much until I reared me one

[RAM’S DAD & CONGREGATION] But now I've learned to love…

[RAM’S DAD] I love my dead gay son!

[CONGREGATION] He loves his son He loves his son His dead gay son!

[RAM'S DAD] Now, I say my boy's in heaven! And he's tanning by the pool The cherubim walk with him and him, and Jesus says it's cool! They don't have crime or hatred, there's no bigotry or cursin' - Just friendly fellows dressed up like their fav'rite Village Person! They were not dirty—

[CONGREGATION] No, no!

[RAM’S DAD] They just had flair!

[CONGREGATION] Whoa!

[RAM’S DAD] They were two bright red ribbons in the Lord's long hair Well, I used to see a homo and go reachin' for my gun

[RAM’S DAD & CONGREGATION] But now I've learned to love…

[RAM’S DAD] And furthermore! These boys were brave as hell! These boys , they knew damn well! Those folks would judge 'em, they were desperate to be free! They took a rebel stance, stripped to their underpants! Paul, I can't believe that you Still refuse to get a clue After all that we been through—

(spoken) I'm talkin’ you and me! In the summer of '83!

[KURT'S DAD, spoken] That was one hell of a fishing trip

[CONGREGATION] Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa Whoa, whoa, whoa! They were not dirty— No! And not perverse— No, no! They were just two stray rhinestones On the Lord's big purse!

[BOTH DADS] Our job is now continuing the work that they begun!

[CONGREGATION] 'Cause now we love, love, love! We love your dead—

[RAM’S DAD] They're up there disco dancing to the thump of angel wings!

[KURT’S DAD] They grab a mate…

[RAM’S DAD] And roller skate—

[BOTH DADS] While Judy Garland sings!

[RAM’S DAD] They live a playful afterlife that's fancy-free and reckless!

[KURT'S DAD] They swing upon the pearly gates—

[BOTH DADS & CONGREGATION] And wear a pearly necklace!

[CONGREGATION] Whoo!

[BOTH DADS] They were not dirty!

[CONGREGATION] No!

[BOTH DADS & CONGREGATION] They were good men! And now they're happy bear cubs in the Lord's big den!

[BOTH DADS] Go forth and love each other now Like our boys would have done We'll teach the world to love...

[CONGREGATION] The world to love...

[ALL] The world to love...

[BOTH DADS overlapping with congregation] I love my dead gay son! My son! My son!

[CONGREGATION] Not half bad, your dead gay son! Wish I had your dead gay son! Thank you, dad, for your...

[BOTH DADS & CONGREGATION] Dead! Gay! Son! THE ONE I NOW COMPARE IT TO (29/5/24)

[thethingything]

so apparently the side effects from the metronidazole got to us so much that now I get to have recurring nightmares about it.

some of the side effects we had happened to match up with the symptoms of the start of a much worse reaction you can have to those meds, and luckily it didn't end up being that, but we spent a few days absolutely terrified by the possibility of it, and clearly that was enough because now we're having nightmares about getting that much worse reaction.

I guess we'll see if that calms down any time soon, but given everything that's happened over the last few months I get the feeling that once we've gotten stuff sorted and things calm down a bit and our brain starts processing everything we're gonna realise just how much all this has fucked us up and trying to process and deal with it all is gonna be exhausting

[daz4i]

a bit insane to know there's people out there who think i'm hot shit tbh. you know i'm a pathetic cringefail loser who literally can't do anything, right?? please raise your standards 😔💔

[ria-starstruck]

so maybe i got another animatic idea. what of it

more indecipherable sketches under the cut!

[snowddeong]

Looking at some translation threads of the ryeji ig live and now I wanna write Yeji one week away from rut exhibiting classic alphaTM traits especially being over protective but it's in the softest way ever so instead of asserting dominance by growling or something she just starts pouting and surpassing even Ryujin's levels of cuddliness

[medicinemane]

The world is set on prescriptivism and... it doesn't jive with me

[korattata]

i wish tumblr would let me put 2 videos in one post so i could post a comparison of how Chicory was acting normal and then 48 hours later was acting. not okay.

mostly so i could just point at it and go 'why are rats like this'

[theflyingsealion]

oh my fucking god

I. I. Ok, so I heard that they'd taken out the ability to go up the reblog chain, but I assumed it was just for the one the person on your dash reblogged from?????

I have been "opening posts in a new tab" all day like I usually do, with the intention of going back and reblogging them all at the end and.

Not a single one of these tabs is an actual post. It's ALL just Tumblr main pages what the fuck

[futuresuntocrystal]

    In related news to my return... Once I get their pictures done, alt has been made for Rhela’s Azem: Circe! [Any pronouns]

    Proficient in magic to an awe-inspiring degree, he was somehow still better known for his chipper demeanor and wandering habits. Scheduling anything to his whims was practically a death knell; whether or not he’d show up on time... You’d have a better chance at predicting next moon’s new fad for creations.

    And yet, it was that down-to-earth, endless need to wander which led her to meet Venat at all; the two quick friends and kindred spirits. Hades and Hythlodaeus took to her in a similar fashion; Hades insisting how tired he was, to be chasing after her all the time... Yet smiling in secret. Hythlodaeus, of course, was more than happy to encourage it all.

    In that light, being nominated to the Seat of Azem only made sense, truly. The friendly spirit who brought a little life to all whom they interacted with... Who sought little adventures that would never end, cherished all life, lived with a passion unmatched...

    Well. All stories end eventually. (But those that follow tend to spin just as wonderful as the original, no?)

[vyrion]

ohhhh.crisis onset

[shiningstages]

Okay I lied to myself yesterday; got rid of Haruhi, Mokou, and Lilia as muses ( for now ). But that's all of the muse cleanup I have in me rn ghjfhgdhfgxhcf I'm gonna try and queue up stuff before I go to work.

[bambi-slxt]

matt with clingy!reader:

✨a concept✨

whenever you go out together he thinks it's adorable when you hold his pinky or fidget with his rings.

going to restaurants is always a struggle because after you eat, you always get sleepy and, i mean, he's right there.

"you're falling asleep on me, baby, wake up."

"don't wanna."

"...is this what it's like to have a cat."

"i will drool on you."

"am i gonna have to carry you to the car?"

snuggles

going to the movies? your hand is in his hoodie pocket always.

"baby, you're-"

"shh, the movie's on."

having to think of his grandma to calm himself down

you take your hand out to grab some popcorn and he thinks he's getting a moment of relief

until the jumpscare happens and you accidentally squeeze his dick through the hoodie and his jeans

sweating bullets for the next hour and a half

making food in the kitchen together?

"i'm helping!"

"sitting on my shoulders and tugging my hair isn't helping."

"you've clearly never seen Ratatouille."

he loves when you sit on his lap while he plays his games, and even bought a bigger chair so you both would be comfy

when he plays more intense games, you curl up on the floor with pillows and blankets and rest your head on his thigh.

you get head pats after each round. (it's mandatory)

during foreplay and sex you're no different, you always want to be touching him. he knows this and occasionally decides not to play fair.

"matty, please..."

"what, baby? use your words."

"you know i hate this game," you say, breathing heavily mere centimeters from his lips.

"but it's so fun to see who has more self control. come on, baby, don't you wanna kiss me?"

whines

he can't resist that. "well if you need me so bad why don't you come here?"

two hours later

shaking like a leaf

"i love you matty."

panting like a mf

"i love you too. you soaked the mattress, jesus."

"shut upppp."

tags: @pinksturniolo  @malirosee  @st7rnioioss

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