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braveclementine · 6 months ago

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Chapter 15

Warnings: None, Readers under 18 can read this book. It is solely fluff- nothing sexual

Copyright: I do not own any Wizarding World characters that J.K. Rowling wrote. I do however own Elizabeth Kane (main character) and Trang Nyguen (best friend). There should be no use of these two names without my permission. I also do not condone any copying of this.

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𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝖈𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖑𝖊 𝖘𝖊𝖊𝖒𝖊𝖉 different when I woke up and over the various weeks. There was no Hagrid on the grounds. Dumbledore was no longer sitting in the high seat. Even though McGonagall was supposed to have taken his place, his seat was left empty. Madam Pomfrey had stopped visitors from coming to the hospital wing. Fear was spreading through the castle like wildfire. I had stopped hanging with Harry and Ron and Ginny as much, isolating myself from people. There was no more Quidditch, private lessons, or clubs.

I had contented myself with being by myself unless in class. I spent my days studying in Hagrid's cabin. It was abandoned, Fang enjoyed the company, and I could be in peace here. There were some times I didn't even go back to the castle and just stayed in Hagrid's bed overnight.

On some days, I performed Hagrid's tasks that I'd been used to helping with. I tended to the hens- Hagrid hadn't had times to get new roosters- pulled the weeds in the garden, and other miscellaneous things.

My visions seemed to have been backed-up over the winter and were now reacting. I was getting visions every hour. Usually, it was stupid stuff like Draco in potions telling Snape to apply for the headmaster position. Or that we were still getting exams. Nothing extremely important.

The forest also became a sanctuary and I started spending a lot of time in there, exploring, taking notes, finding new places and discovering which trees held fairies and Bowtruckles and so many other things.

A letter from dad came. Sadie found me reading a book on the floor of Hagrid's cabin. It was a new book, one of the Muggle books that Trang had sent me for Christmas. I looked up and took the letter from her beak.

"You can stay in here for a little bit if you'd like." I offered. "It's nice and cozy, just stay high enough, I don't know how Fang will react to you."

She flew about the room and settled on the back of the chair while I opened and read dads' letter.

Dear Elizabeth, I'm getting worried. I haven't heard from you for a long time. I've heard rumours from the school. Is it true that Dumbledore was removed? What is going on, you haven't told me nearly anything since Christmas. If I don't hear from you soon, I will approach the Professors. I'm sure they'll tell me something. Love, Dad P.S. I'm worried, did I mention that?

I sighed, setting the letter aside. Pulling parchment out of my bag and I grabbed my Fwooper quills and started writing to dad.

Dear Dad, I haven't been well. I don't mean I've been sick, just a bit depressed. Cornelius Fudge took Hagrid away because he doesn't have any other suspects for the Chamber of Secrets being open again. Did I mention that the Chamber of Secrets has been opened? I don't know if any of that has made the news yet. It's horrid. Yes, Lucius Malfoy got the twelve Governors to sign a piece of paper saying Dumbledore was to be removed. McGonagall's headmistress right now. Hermione was one of the victims of the chamber. The mandrakes are almost ready though so they should be up in a month or so. I miss her. I suppose I haven't been my cheerful self as much. I got caught up with boys for a time period but I quickly shed that part of me so I could focus on schoolwork. Quidditch has been canceled which was horrid luck because we might've won the cup this year. I've been spending a lot of time in Hagrid's cabin. I haven't slept in my dorm in some time. I feel safer in Hagrid's cabin. Whatever the menace is, it's in the castle, not out of it. It kind've feels like I'm living on my own almost. I didn't realize how lonely it can be, living alone, and it makes me miss you all the more. I still have Harry and Ron but it's just not the same. But, I'm just trying to press on and only focus on grades. I know you've been asking for sketches so I included some. These I drew in the Forbidden Forest. I've met a nice centaur called Firenze. Sometimes I talk about philosophy and the stars with him. (I've known him since my first year actually). Stop being worried, I'll be quite alright. I just hope Dumbledore and Hagrid come back soon. Right, well, I'm off to go to the Forbidden Forest again. I found a nice patch of purple and pink flowers that I want to draw and color before the sun goes down. I miss you horribly too. Much love, Elizabeth

I quickly tore a couple of drawings out of my sketchbook and used a shrinking spell so that they would fit into the envelope. Then, I sealed it and poked a small hole through it. I found some nuts for Sadie to eat while I tied the envelope to her leg.

"Is that okay?" I asked softly as I tied it tightly to her leg. She hooted softly and bobbed her head up and down. I gave her a sad smile, and smoothed her head feathers. She ruffled her head and nibble my ear.

"Safe flight Sadie." I whispered, kissing her head. "I'll get you some treats when you come back, okay?"

She hooted again and flew out Hagrid's open window. I closed it after she left and grabbed my sketchbook and went out to where I wanted to go.

I got back at dusk and headed up to the castle to eat. I ate with the subdued Hufflepuffs (nobody talked to me). Then, I headed back out to Hagrid's cabin. I closed the door behind me, put food in Fang's bowl, turned off the lights, made sure the window was tightly closed, and laid down to fall asleep.

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𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝖓𝖊𝖝𝖙 𝖒𝖔𝖗𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌, I got dressed and headed to the Great Hall for breakfast and then made my way to Transfiguration. I dully transformed my two rabbits into slippers and was reminded of Sushi who was at Trang's parents house right now. I wished that he was here with me. The wish made me transform my slippers back into rabbits so I could pet them. I felt some of the depression wash away as the rabbits licked my face and cleaned themselves.

Then, Professor McGonagall had to walk us to Herbology. I trailed behind, not watching where I was going. Professor Snape had led the Gryffindors there as well. I didn't even notice if he'd left or not as I filed into the Herbology greenhouse.

I absentmindedly went to a random station so that I could start working at pruning Abyssinian Shrivelfigs. I usually got a whole plot to myself because I did more than any of the other students working together.

I did notice through my stupor however, that Ernie and Hannah were talking to Harry. I supposed that Ernie had apologized. I finished pruning twenty Shrivelfigs before the class was over and Professor Sprout awarded me with 15 house points. I thought it was a bit generous but then again, without the Quidditch match, the houses had to make up for lost points.

I left the greenhouse and caught up with Harry and Ron since we were going to Defense Against the Dark Arts together.

"Hello Elizabeth." Harry said, somewhat cheerfully as I approached.

"Long time no see." Ron said, sounding a bit grudgeful.

"Sorry." I apologized, not feeling sorry at all and also sorry at the same time, "I realize I've been a bit distant. I haven't been a very good friend recently."

"It's alright." Harry said, sounding earnest. Perhaps he thought that if he said the wrong thing I'd stop hanging around again.

"It's not." I said, matching his friendly tone. "But thanks for saying so. I'll be much better after this is all over. To bad we can't pin it on Draco. . ."

We took our usual spots in the back of the classroom. Ron asked me what sorts of creatures were in the Forbidden Forest. I wasn't entirely sure why he was asking but I answered, "Well, there are centaurs, who are very distant creatures. Always treat them with the highest respect. There's also unicorns, though they're quite shy of humans. Bowtruckles, fairies, imps, all sorts of things."

"Any. . .bad things?" Ron asked nervously.

"Sure," I said, pulling my Muggle book out of my bag so that I could read it throughout class. I found that Gerald's Game certainly took my attention away from Lockhart's foolishness. "There's Gytrashes-"

"What are those?" Ron asked.

"They're a spirit like animal. Most like a dog or wolf." I answered, flipping the book open. "The only thing that drives them away is light. They'll hunt in packs and eat you."

Ron gulped nervously, "What about werewolves?"

"Only on a full moon." was my answer.

"Anything else?" Ron asked.

I sighed, looking up from the sentence I'd read about three times now, trying to find my reading groove. "Perhaps. It's a large forest and I haven't explored all of it."

Ron opened his mouth to answer when Lockhart bounced into the room, practically radiating with cheerfulness. We all gaped at him, even me, lowering my book to stare at him. (Though I must admit my expression was more in disgust than anything else).

"Come now. Why all these long faces?" Lockhart cried, beaming. "Don't you people realize? The danger has passed! The culprit has been taken away-"

"Says who?" Dean asked loudly.

"My dear young man, the Minister of Magic wouldn't have taken Hagrid if he hadn't been one hundred percent sure that he was guilty." Lockhart said in a tone as though talking to a young child who didn't know anything.

"Oh, yes he would." Ron and I said together, much louder than Dean.

Lockhart turned his attention to Ron. I was starting to feel my blood boil. This class was useless anyways, why had I come in the first place? "I flatter myself I know a touch more about Hagrid's arrest than you do, Mr. Weasley." Lockhart said, sounding satisfied.

I got up from my seat, my chair screeching. I ignored all the shocked looks, grabbed my bag, and strode out of the room. It was official, that was my last class for Defense Against the Dark Arts this year. I stopped by the Great Hall, filled my bag with food, and walked out of the castle.

There were other students out and about on the grounds today. The older students who had free periods. It was a nice day, warm, and also it seemed safer outdoors than in the castle. I strode close to the Forbidden Forest and then slipped inside the cabin that I was starting to call home.

Fang's barks were loud and I quickly filled his dog bowl with food. He ate away messily while I closed the curtains and ate at Hagrid's table myself. Then, I pulled out my Transfiguration homework and started on it.

I worked late into the night, ate some fruit for dinner, made sure Fang's bowls were full, made sure the windows were locked, the curtains were pulled, and then turned out the light, and climbed into bed.

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𝕬𝖗𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖉 𝖒𝖎𝖉𝖓𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙, 𝖘𝖔𝖒𝖊𝖔𝖓𝖊 entered the cabin, which woke me up, and I rolled over quickly to grab my wand as the lights flashed on.

"Elizabeth?" came a shocked, but familiar voice.

"Harry?" I asked, shielding my eyes from the sudden light.

"What are you doing here?" We all asked at the same time.

"I've sort've lived here since Hagrid left." I said, sitting up, feeling all embarrassed. "I feed Fang and do some of what Hagrid would've done if he'd still been here. Now, what are you��doing here?"

"Ron and I are going into the Forbbiden Forest." Harry said, laying his invisibility cloak on the wooden table. "We're going to follow the spiders."

I nodded, pushing my hair back and tied it into a ponytail. "Good lead."

Fang bounded up to Harry. "C'mon Fang, we're going for a walk." Harry said, patting Fang's leg. "D'you want to come? You'd be a good guide."

I shrugged. "Sure, I've got nothing better to do." I grabbed my wand off the table. I had a onslaught of visions as I grabbed my journal and then left it on the table. Alright, we were going to be running for our lives tonight.

I turned the lights out in the cabin and followed Ron and Harry out of the forest.

"Lumos." Harry said. His wand light up like a Muggle torch.

I did the same.

"Good thinking." Ron said. "I'd do the same but it'd probably blow up or something."

I giggled and felt my heart lighten. I'd forgotten how much I loved Ron's stupid jokes and comments.

"So, Elizabeth." Harry said as we searched the grass for spiders. "Is this why you've been so distant?"

I nodded and then remembered that it was dark and we were looking down at the grass. "A bit. I've been really upset about Hagrid and Dumbledore of course. Lockhart's getting on my nerves. I have no Quidditch or private tutoring sessions. My only sanctuary now is Hagrid's house. Plus, since all the attacks happen in the same place, I've assumed I'm actually safer in Hagrid's tiny little cabin."

"Wow." Harry said.

"I know it's not fair and it's extremely selfish." I continued, feeling guilty. "After all, everyone's going through the same thing as me so I shouldn't be reacting so badly."

"No." Harry said, sounding just a little awed. "I've felt real horrible about the whole ordeal. I just never thought about leaving the castle and staying anywhere else. Quite frankly, I don't think I'd have the guts."

I blushed with a bit of pride. Harry thought I was brave!

I scoffed, "You're extremely brave Harry. Think about last year."

Harry said nothing as he found the spiders and we started following them. Fang scampered around the three of us, sniffing tree roots and leaves.

"You've been in here a lot, right Elizabeth?" Ron asked hesitantly. I knew he was frightened of the forest.

"A bit." I lied. "Okay, a lot. Though I've never gone far in this general direction. I prefer the lighter part of the forest near the Centaur camp."

"Perhaps you should lead then." Ron said. "Plus, you know the most spells."

I shrugged, not scared at all. Though I would've liked Firenze to accompany us. "Sure."

I led the way, keeping my wand low to the ground so that I could keep track of the spiders. We were getting into the parts of the forest that were unsafe, I could feel it. It was extremely dark- much darker than I 'd ever been in. The centaurs lived deep in the forest too, but the trees were never this close. At least we were still on the path. . . until the spiders left the path.

I hesitated.

"What d'you reckon?" Harry asked breathlessly. He'd just jumped back onto Ron's foot because Fang's nose had touched his hand.

"We'll be fine." I said, keeping my voice cool and collected. I left the path all the time and technically, the spiders were a type of path. "C'mon."

We moved much slower now. We had to move through the thick trees and hop over tree stumps. I also had to crouch more often to find the trail of spiders and then lead in the general direction. After some moments, we started to travel at a downward slope and I was starting to regret coming.

I could be sleeping. I complained in my head. For some reason, sleeping made me think of Professor Snape, and I quickly returned my thoughts to the mission.

Then, Fang let out a great booming bark. All three of us jumped.

"What?" Ron nearly shouted out. I noticed he was gripping Harry's elbow very hard.

"There's something coming." I whispered, holding my wand a little higher.

"Sounds like something big." Harry said nervously.

We listened very carefully and I lifted my wand higher. The sound was coming towards our right and I turned slightly to that direction. Was it a pack of Gytrashes? The wand light should've scared them off though. . . No, it couldn't be Gytrashes because there was the sound of snapping branches. Gytrashes were spirits, they didn't make such noises.

So what was it?

"Oh, no. Oh, no, oh, no, oh-" Ron was whispering frantically under his breath.

"Shut up." Harry said frantically, starting to panic a little. "It'll hear you." Well, at least he still had some common sense.

"Hear me?" Ron asked, his voice extremely high. "It's already heard Fang!"

"I don't think it's dangerous. . ." I said slowly, starting to walk towards the sound. I had a good feeling about this.

"Are you crazy?" Harry hissed.

I reached the top of the hill and quickly ran back down again, making Harry and Ron panic, and start to run in to the opposite direction "Wait!" I shouted, "Come back."

I stopped and turned back around as the car flew up the hill and stopped up there. It's head lights glowed brightly, showing up the entire area.

"It's our car!" Ron cried in relief.

Ron and Harry came back, nearly running up to the car. Fang however, had run into a thorn bush so I went over and helped him out. Then, I joined Ron and Harry by the car.

The car was completely empty on the inside. The sides of the car were scratched, dented, and smeared with mud. I supposed that it had been exploring the forest on it's own. To bad it hadn't flown back to Mr. Weasley although I supposed it may be a good thing for us.

"And we thought it was going to attack us!" Ron said. He seemed much happier than he had only moments earlier. "I wondered where it had gone!"

I hadn't. I tried thinking about it as little as possible. Perhaps after the end of the year I would go and deposit about 300 Galleons in their vault as repayment. I wondered how much Mr. Weasley had been fined. . . had the newspaper mentioned it? I'm sure I could find a copy of the article somewhere.

"We've lost the trail." I heard Harry say from behind me. "C'mon, let's go and find them."

Ron didn't answer and I looked up from studying the car. His eyes were fixed on whatever was behind me and his face was full of terror. My heart stopped, and then sped up, and I went to turn around to see what it was.

I was suddenly picked up and I shrieked out in terror. I didn't struggle (because the drop would've done some serious damage to my body), but moved my head around to see what had grabbed hold of me. Large. Spiders.

I whimpered softly, terrified. I had forgotten how much I hated spiders. I closed my eyes, feeling the swaying motion as the spiders carried me. I would've scrunched my body up in a ball to protect myself if I thought it would've helped. Instead, I shivered with nerves and fright, my eyes squeezed tight and feeling like I might be seasick. I'd never been a boat before, I'd never seen the ocean before but I was fairly certain that this was the sensation that sailors called seasickness. I could hear Fang squealing and barking and fighting to free himself.

We were in the spider's clutches for about twenty-seven minutes before we reached a place where the darkness was lifted. I peeked one eye open, noticing the shift in light behind my eyelids. I looked upwards in shock. There were no more trees and the stars shone through, bright and fierce. I looked down at the ground, both eyes open now.

There was a hollow, the kind that would've been in a story book. The kind of hollow where you would set up a cottage and a little garden and never be bothered for years. But no one in their right mind would set up a little cottage here. There were hundreds of spiders as large as horses, waiting. There were many spider webs too and I shivered. Imagine getting that in your hair!

But this would've been a nice place to draw. I looked around, hoping to soak in details to draw when I got back to the cabin.

The spiders closed around as the three spiders (one was carrying Harry and me) slowly made their way down into the valley. The one carrying Harry and I dropped us onto our knees.

I heard the spider say, "Aragog! Aragog!" It was hard to understand the spider because it had to click its pincers to speak.

From the domed web, a spider came up out of the gigantic hole. I stared in shock and horror. The spider was nearly the size of a small elephant. He was obviously very old. His eyes were milky white, a sign that he was blind. He also had gray fur mixed in with his black hair.

"What is it?" He asked, his pincers clicking as he spoke.

"Men." the spider said simply.

"Is it Hagrid?" Aragog asked, moving closer. His eyes wandered randomly.

"Strangers." A different spider said, dropping Ron onto the floor. The third spider followed suit, dropping Fang- almost delighted to drop his squirming package. Fang ran and cowered between Harry and I. I put a hand out on his head to comfort him.

"Kill them." Aragog said, sounding a bit fretful. Perhaps he was worried why Hagrid had not come and visited in a while. "I was sleeping. . ."

Understandable. I would want to kill anyone who woke me while I was sleeping too. Yes, yes totally understandable. . .

"We're friends of Hagrid's." Harry said suddenly.

The pincers in the hollow went wild and then quieted down.

Aragog paused. "Hagrid has never sent men into our hollow before." he said slowly.

"Hagrid's in trouble." Harry said, his breathing seemed very shallow. "That's why we've come."

"In trouble?" It sounded as though the aged spider actually cared about Hagrid. Maybe. "But why has he sent you?"

Right! Why the hell had Hagrid sent us?

Harry, I realized, was still sitting where the spider had dropped him. So was Ron. I was standing. I wondered if I should be sitting. I decided not to move.

"They think, up at the school, that Hagrid's been setting a- a- something on students. They've taken him to Azkaban."

Aragog clicked his pincers madly. I wondered if he knew what Azkaban was. It was like applause, I realized. That's what the sound reminded me of. "But that was years ago." Aragog said fretfully. He really was worried. That was sweet. "Years and years ago. I remember it well. That's why they made him leave the school. They believed that I was the monster that dwells in what they call the Chamber of Secrets. They thought that Hagrid had opened the Chamber and set me free."

"And you. . . you didn't come from the Chamber of Secrets?" Harry asked, sounding a bit confused.

"I!" Aragog cried indignantly. Yep, we were going to die. "I was not born in the castle. I came from a distant land. A traveler gave me to Hagrid when I was an egg. Hagrid was only a boy, but he cared for me, hidden in a cupboard in the castle, feeding me on scraps from the table. Hagrid is my good friend, and a good man. When I was discovered and blamed for the death of a girl, he protected me. I have lived here in the forest ever since, where Hagrid still visits me. He even found me a wife, Mosag, and you see how our family has grown, all through Hagrid's goodness. . ."

Awww! So maybe we weren't going to die!

"So you never- never attacked anyone?" Harry asked, his breathing a bit deeper.

"Never." The old spider croaked more calmly. "It would have been my instinct, but out of respect for Hagrid, I never harmed a human. The body of the girl who was killed was discovered in a bathroom. I never saw any part of the castle but the cupboard in which I grew up. Our kind like the dark and the quiet. . ."

I gave a start and looked at Ron. The girl had been killed in a bathroom?

"But then. . ." I turned my attention back to Harry. "Do you know what did kill the girl? Because whatever it is, it's back and attacking people again-"

The spiders interrupted, clicking their mandibles angrily and shifting their many legs. I shivered and looked about me nervously. My hand immediately went into my pocket where my wand was at the moment. We were totally dead.

"The thing that lives in the castle, is an ancient creature we spiders fear above all others. Well do I remember how I pleaded with Hagrid to let me go, when I sensed the beast moving about the school."

"What is it?" Hagrid asked, a bit urgent and yet, a bit excited.

The spiders hissed. "We do not speak of it." Aragog said angrily. "We do not name it! I never even told Hagrid the name of the dread creatures, though he asked me, many times."

Harry got to his feet, helping Ron up. The other spiders were closing in and I drew my wand, keeping it pressed closely to my body. Aragog was back away into the domed web.

"We'll just go, then." Harry called desperately to Aragog.

Aragog answered slowly, "Go? I think not. . ."

"But- but-" Harry seemed to be racking his brain for an excuse to not die.

"My sons and daughters do not harm Hagrid, on my command. But I cannot deny them fresh meat, when it wanders so willingly into our midst. Good-bye, friend of Hagrid."

Harry and I spun around. The spiders were closing in. I reacted quickly, shooting spells as the spiders all around us. They backed up a little but I knew it was hopeless. There were too many of them, Ron's wand was broken, and Harry was drawing his much to slowly.

I shot spell after spell at the spiders. If I could keep us alive long enough. . .there! There was the loud noise. I turned, expectantly as Mr. Weasley's car came down the hill, headlights glaring, horn hoking, knocking spiders aside. It screeched to a halt in front of us and its doors opened.

I kept shooting spells while Harry dived into the front seat, yelling at Ron to grab Fang and for me to get into the car. Like I didn't know that the car was the safe place! I made it into the passenger seat, slamming the door behind me. Ron tossed Fang into the car and before the doors were even shut the car was driving away. I clutched the arm seats and closed my eyes, my heart pounding.

"Are you okay?" I heard Harry's voice asking.

I nodded, feeling that if I answered, I may throw up, and I didn't think the car would react kindly to that.

"That was quick spell work Liz." Harry said again.

"Thanks." I murmured.

The car stopped at the edge of the forest and we all climbed out. Fang shot off back towards Hagrid's cabin. I made sure my legs wouldn't collapse underneath me and I made my way back to the cabin as well. I certainly wasn't going to be staying here tonight. I gathered up my things while Harry came in and grabbed the invisibility cloak.

"Going back up to the castle?" He asked.

I nodded, "I can't stand the idea of staying out here alone. I retract my earlier statement. It might not be safer out here than in the castle."

Harry laughed but it sounded strained. He went out to check on Ron and I checked on Fang. He was alright and I covered him with his blanket. I double checked the food bowls and then turned the lights off and headed outside.

Ron was violently sick in the pumpkin patch and I cleaned up his mess with my wand. I certainly wasn't going to work on the garden with vomit in there.

"That's exactly Hagrid's problem!" Ron said, continuing a conversation that they'd been having. He thumped his fist against the wall of his cabin. "He always thinks monsters aren't as bad as they're made out, and look where its' got him! A cell in Azkaban! What was the point of sending us in there? What have we found out, I'd like to know?"

"That Hagrid never opened the Chamber of Secrets." Harry said, clutching the invisibility cloak in his arms and motioned me over so that we could start walking under it. "He was innocent."

Ron snorted. I supposed that he didn't find Aragog as an innocent case.

"Riddle got the wrong person." I whispered out loud. We reached the castle and stopped talking. Harry pushed open the large front doors and we slipped inside. There were many sentries walking about and we had to take it slowly. I slipped out from under the cloak as we approached one of the corridors near Hufflepuff common room.

I made my way carefully through the hallways, turned the last corner before the common room, and bumped into Professor Snape of all people. I fell backwards and would've fallen to the ground if he hadn't caught my arm and pulled me back up again. The pull was so violent our noses touched.

"What are you doing out of your dorm!" He hissed angrily.

My tongue twisted. He was still touching my arm. He quickly let go. "Are you mad?" He asked, still extremely angry.

"I- um-. . ."

"What!" he glared at me.

I took a deep breath, feeling strangely defensive. "I've er- been sleeping in Hagrid's cabin." My cheeks turned red.

Professor Snape stopped being angry for two seconds and asked in surprise, "Why?"

On the defensive I said, "I think better there. I don't know, it's peaceful there. I feel less lonely when I'm there. Safer."

"You're lonely?" He repeated, sounding a bit confused. My cheeks flushed red again.

"It's not so bad." I muttered.

We stared at each other for a moment. Then he said, "Go to bed Elizabeth."

"Aren't you going to take house points from me?" I asked curiously, as he walked past me.

"No. Go to bed- Now."

Confused, I slipped inside the Hufflepuff Common room and headed up to my dorm. I set my bag down by the bed and collapsed on it, fully dressed, kicking off my muddy shoes. I fell asleep quickly, feeling that something horrible was going to happen. . . and soon.

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licncourt · 1 year ago

Note

what happened with your fish :(

Well. It's been kind of a nightmare domino effect over the past few weeks. I tried a new food for them because it was supposed to be high protein or something (I don't even remember now) but for some reason it didn't break down like other fish food and started rotting in the water. I didn't realize it was happening because it was blending in with the gravel, but then overnight like seven of my little neon tetras died and I found the problem when I was digging around in the tank looking for the cause.

Anyway I did a two water changes and vacuumed the substrate like crazy and everything was fine after that, but I needed more neons because they have to have a larger school than what was left. I got some more at the pet store, but they were all dead within a couple days. The other fish in the tank were fine though.

Sometimes neons are sensitive to change and it's possible for new additions to not make it sometimes, so I cleaned the tank out really well to get rid of the decomp, then went back and got another seven or so neons once the water parameters were good again. They all looked healthy, so I put them in. Again, all dead within a couple days.

I went back to pet store again and explained what happened and the guy working there was like, yeah we've been having trouble with our fish recently. Which ???? why wouldn't you tell people that ???? But I decided to just let it go and let things settle down in there + another cleaning before trying a third time from a different aquatic supplier.

So that all happened, and then I noticed one of my tetras had fin rot. Not the end of the world, that can happen and stress of all that cleaning plus the fluctuating water quality can cause it, so I went to pick up some aquarium antibiotics today (but I hadn't really looked at the fish closely since last night).

When I was checking them today though to start medicating, I realized that the fin rot had spread to almost all the fish in the tank overnight, plus all the neons were gone this time, one of my platys was dead, and several others were covered in fungus. My gourami looks sick too, I don't know with what though, he seems fine visually.

I guess either the two rashes of death in there plus the stress made things go south or maybe the new neons brought some kind of weird bacteria with them that infected the others. They didn't seem sick at all when I got them though so I wasn't really worried about that.

But basically. That's been my saga. I'm treating them with melafix and erythromycin but honestly things don't look good :( If they keep going downhill and suffering, I might have to euthanize them and start completely over.

#i'm so fucking sad i've had these fish for years and they've never been sick before #it can't be a coincidence #i don't think this is my fault logically but i still feel so guilty that this happened #answered #flora.txt

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ohtobeleah · 1 year ago

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Okay so about the whole paranormal experiences thing: my experiences were comforting but kinda freak me out still.

I always get a feeling in my stomach before someone dies. The first time I can remember this happening was when I was seven. My Grandma got sick and died within the span of a week, but I had a horrible stomach ache the day before she was complaining about not feeling well. The evening that she passed, I was lying on the couch in tears from how bad my stomach hurt. The next day it was gone. I had the same feeling for a few days before my Papa, dog, and an elderly woman I was very close with passed away, none as severe as when my Grandma died, I just had this feeling in the pit of my stomach for a few days to a few hours beforehand.

The night after my Papa died I had a dream where he told me goodbye

After my Papa died I went through a really hard time mentally, my anxiety was through the roof. To the point I was having panic attacks in the bathroom almost daily at school. Whenever they would happen though, I would always smell my Papa or my Granny (who I never met but I just knew it was her) or whenever I would close my eyes, I would see my Grandma putting on lipstick (something she was very famous for, she never went anywhere unless she was wearing lipstick). My mom also had a dream where her sister said goodbye after she passed.

When my brother was around 13-ish and I was 3 he went on a overnight trip with our Paster at the time. They were staying at this resort sort of thing where you can rent a cabin out and then they have all of these things you can do. Well, they were heading back to the cabin to go to sleep and they ran into this man who was high or drunk and it was this huge muscular dude, like seven preteens/teenagers and maybe three adults, my brother got pretty freaked out because they guy was yelling and stuff. everything was fine, cops came and arested the guy and he was band from the resort but my brother was pretty shook up. But get this, according to my Mom I couldn't sleep the entire night and I was telling her "Bubba scared". Safe to say I freaked her out, she called my brother and although he was perfectly safe and told me so through the phone, I still couldn't sleep the entire night. Odviously I have no memory of this but that is what my Mom and brother say happened.

I don't mind this being posted, btw.

This is wild, I don’t know if id be able to handle being able to physically feel pain. It would freak me out too much

According to my mum I used to sit on the first step of our pool and speak to my great grandmother and my grandmother who had both died.

Apparently I spoke to my grandma a lot! My dads mum who passed away in a car accident when he was 12. I was five at the time and they swear they hadn’t spoken to me about her yet.

Kids see ghosts. I’m telling you. But I haven’t had any experiences with her since. Which is kinda sad. Id like to!

#paranormal talkins

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pasamba-is-music · 2 years ago

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Smino - Smeezy Dot Com (Review)

Smeezy Dot Com is the debut mixtape by St. Louis rapper/singer Smino. He released it in 2012 after his name change from C.Smi to Smino, and to commemorate the creation of his website of the same name.

I became a Smino fan when I went to college and needed music to listen to on the bus or in the library. I had listened to Noir before in high school -- I liked it but I never thought to go back through his catalogue until then. At college, I finally listened to his debut album blkswn and it practically changed my life. Smino and Monte Booker instantly became some of my biggest musical inspirations and my favorite musical act of all time -- a feeling that has only gotten stronger over the past year I've been a Smino fan. After getting into him I started to dig through his older work like blkjuptr, She Already Decided and Sick! Sick! Sick! -- I enjoyed these, but this whole time I was ignorant to what is the rarest body of work Smino has ever put out.

Smeezy Dot Com is not available on any streaming platforms (including Soundcloud). I had to go digging for this album through Smino's old tweets and was given this mediafire link.

The most notable thing to consider when listening to this mixtape is that it is entirely self-produced. This was created before Smino had gone to Chicago, Il. and met Monte Booker and the rest of what would become Zero Fatigue. If you're familiar at all with Smino's style of production ... let's just say producing isn't his strong point. None of the beats are particularly bad, but more-so generic. It's got that signature 2000s hip hop blend of hard drums, keyboard synths, and the occasional sample flip that's overproduced to the point of sounding like another generic Billboard hit.

Smeezy Dot Com wears its influences on its sleeve -- the most obvious being Kanye West and Lil Wayne. Smino interpolates many bars from both artists: "everybody wanna listen to Weezy and Yeezy. And oh yeah Smeezy"

The signature Smino sound that his fans are used to is pretty absent on this tape. The body of work is very rap focused, with little to no singing present. The beats sound like the generic hip hop instrumentals you'd hear from the early 2000s, akin to the sounds of early Kanye, Lil Wayne, Rick Ross, etc. It's such a strange contrast to the soulful, laidback sound that he's known for these days and it honestly doesn't work for him. Today, we know how talented Smino is as a rapper, singer, and writer. But in his early career he was still learning and finding his sound. There are some fun bars here and there on this tape that shows Smino's character and ability early on, but the flows aren't nearly as iconic as they would soon become on later works.

Overall, the tape isn't nearly his best work. But, I don't think it needs to be. Despite this tape not being incredible, I do think it has incredible value for any Smino fan. Comparing this tape to something more recent he's done like Luv 4 Rent is a beautiful thing to see. Smino came from such humble beginnings as a musician, and to see his incredible growth from a somewhat generic rapper to one of the most infectious voices in hip hop and rnb is something to admire.

As an artist, I sometimes get discouraged by the quality of my work as it currently is. Being 19 and in music school, I constantly feel so much more inferior to my musical peers who have found greater success than me either artistically or commercially at such a young age. I look at the work they're putting out now and think "if I'm not sounding that good at the same age as them, then what's the point?" But then I take a look at some of my favorite artists' earlier works and realize that success and artistic growth doesn't come overnight.

Smino released Smeezy Dot Com over 10 years ago at the age of 21. It got barely any traction and these days nobody ever considers it when discussing his catalogue, and for good reason. Smino dedicated himself to his craft and his growth as an artist, and any doubters who might have listened to this tape were soon proven wrong by the incredible quality his work soon had when he grew more not just as an artist, but as a human. Going from surface level bars over generic beats to writing beautiful love songs over heartwarming instrumentals is something that deserves admiration -- and I believe that it's the true ideal that artists should be looking towards when thinking about the progression of their careers.

You may start off on the wrong foot in your career and not even know it. But your art will eventually lead you down a path to creating what you were meant to create, and will fall on the right ears, at the right time, in the right way.

#smino #hip hop #rnb #smeezy dot com #music review #2012

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casspurrjoybell-20 · 3 months ago

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FOOLS Fall - Chapter 33 - Part 2

BOOK TWO: The 'Fools Fall in Love' Trilogy

*Warning Adult Content*

Noah Wright

To: Noah Wright

[Dude, I'm telling you, Sam and Carter aren't going. Just me Emily Haven Kaitlyn and the two friends you're bringing.]

From: Jason Robertson

That was the text I got Wednesday evening from my old high school friend discussing the holiday weekend.

Every year, my friends and I go to Jason's vacation house up in Wisconsin.

Last year I spent it with Sam.

This year I wanted nothing to do with him.

Not after he had sex with Carter but Jason reassured me that Sam and Carter wouldn't be there which was why I was pretty heated when I saw Carter pull up in the vacation house driveway.

"What the fuck is he doing here?" I questioned Jason.

Jason looked guilty as he rubbed the back of his neck.

"Alright listen, I know what Carter did was messed up but he's apologized and I can't deal with you two being in a fight. We're all brothers and brothers forgive each other."

"You're fucking joking right? Carter's not my fucking brother or friend or anything equivalent. He's a selfish dick that you told me wouldn't be here," I seethed.

Everyone was watching this encounter, Jason's girlfriend and my good friend, Emily along with my ex-girlfriend, Kaitlyn watched from the couch.

Ciera stood by me while Kyle rolled a joint from the kitchen counter and kept eyeing us.

Kyle was a part of Jude's friend group along with Ciera but he was closer to Ciera.

When she ditched their group for me, so did Kyle.

Everyone knew, vaguely, what had happened between Sam, Carter and myself, which was why Emily spoke up.

"Jason, that was literally two weeks ago, you're being insensitive."

"Well, he's already here, so what am I supposed to do?" Jason asked genuinely as he looked panicked.

"Tell him to leave," Ciera, Kaitlyn and myself, said in unison.

Emily said...

"Tell him 'What's a big idea being here?' and he should just go."

Kyle stayed quiet.

"Ya' know what," I started.

"I'll tell him," I decided as I made my way outside.

"Noah, don't," Ciera called to me and they all followed.

Carter was grabbing his overnight bag from the trunk of his car when I walked up to him.

"What the fuck are you doing here?"

He turned to me with a nonchalant look.

His face from when I hit him two weeks prior was still bruised but fading.

"They're my friends too, Noah. Believe it or not, you can't control everything."

"I don't give a shit, leave," I demanded, hands balled into a fist and I tried to keep my emotions at bay before I lash out physically.

Carter gave a humorless laugh.

"I'm not dealing with your fucking tantrum today, so get over it," but when he tried walking past me all smug, I shoved him back.

"Okay guys, let's chill out," I heard Jason say but we ignored him as Carter dropped his bag on the gravel ground before pushing me back.

"I'm sick and tired of you thinking you never do anything wrong," Carter exclaimed at me.

"I know I do shit wrong but know what I don't do? Fuck your best friend's ex-boyfriend," I yelled back, my anger coming through as I attacked him to the ground and wailed on him, punch after punch.

Everyone is as shouting at us to stop but we couldn't.

I was too dazed by the solid hatred we felt towards the other.

"Who the fuck does that to their friend?" I screamed at him.

Carter was able to dodge a few hits and even clocked me causing me to fall back and release him.

Then Carter had control of the punches, torturing me as he said.

"You should've heard Sam moaning under me."

My heart squeezed in an aching throb as he spoke.

"Of course he wasn't thinking about his shitty boyfriend while I was inside him."

I kicked him off me and was about to throw another punch until I was yanked off him by Jason and Kyle.

I shook myself free of the arms attached to me.

"Fuck you," I shot at Carter who was on the ground and I made sure to spit on him before Ciera put her hand on my chest and pushed me back.

"Enough," she told me.

"Go," she charged, forcing me to turn around and pushing me when I wouldn't budge.

Inside, I was fuming, my face was bruising and hurt like a bitch as Ciera pulled me into the bathroom.

"I'm going to find a first aid kit. Stay here," her tone was threatening.

I looked like shit in the mirror but I hoped Carter looked worse.

My anger cooled some as I took deep breaths.

Then Jason appeared at the doorway and said.

"Did that make you feel better?"

I grunted as a response.

"Good," Jason said and tossed me a first aid kit before shoving Carter into the bathroom with me.

"Now you two, talk it out," and Jason slammed the door shut.

I scoffed and took a seat on the closed toilet seat, grumbling under my breath about how bullshit this was as I unclasped the kit, pulling out bandages and antiseptic cream.

Carter silently grabbed toilet paper, ripping off a good amount and brought it to his nose as he sat down on the edge of the bathtub.

We didn't talk for five long minutes until Carter broke the quiet.

First by clearing his throat then.

"I'm sorry about... ya' know, the Sam moaning comment."

"Shut up," I told him but my tone was more exhausted than bitter.

"I really am sorry about everything," Carter continued.

"I don't care."

We were silent for another moment then I asked.

"How did Elliott take it?"

Carter sighed, leaning his head back against the wall.

"He's upset with me and mad at Sam."

"Hmm," was all I responded with.

"We weren't together anyway, so he has nothing to be upset about."

I laughed, sardonically.

"God, you're an asshole. You know as well as everyone else, that it didn't matter whether or not you two were exclusive. You both acted like you were in fucking love with each other. Jeez, was it even worth it, to hook up with Sam?"

When Carter didn't respond right away, I looked over at him.

He seemed distraught and filled with shame.

"No," he spoke quietly.

"It wasn't worth it," he sighed and turned to me.

"Noah, you have no clue how sorry I am. I wish I could take it back but I can't and I lost you and Elliott because of it."

He looked away and leaned his head back on the bathroom wall.

"I'll leave. You should stay here and be with everyone."

I didn't say anything to that.

I just thought.

Thought if I could ever forgive him.

Even if I did, we wouldn't be the close friends we were before.

Although, part of me wanted to forgive him and Sam but it hurt too much thinking about them two together, intimately.

To think that Sam actually was moaning and getting pleasure from someone other than me.

So Carter left and I didn't speak to him for months after that.

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bluejaysandblackbats · 10 months ago

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If There’s Nothing Missing In My Life…

Fandom: DC Comics, Superfam

Summary: Newly-emancipated popstar and child actor, Conner (screen name: Lucky) navigates high school and stardom on his own.

Chapters: 4/?

Characters: Conner Kent, Lois Lane, Roxy Leech, Rex Leech, Lois Lane, Clark Kent, Hillary Chang

Additional Tags: Highschool AU, Celebrity AU, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Exploitation, References to Depression, Conner Kent Needs a Hug, Conner Luthor, Lex Luthor is Conner’s Parent, Childhood Trauma, Self-Confidence Issues, Teen Angst, Angst, POV First Person, No Powers AU, Conner Kent-centric, Bisexual Conner Kent, POV Conner Kent, Protective Lex Luthor, Child Celebrity AU

Chapter Four: Visiting Hours

I awakened to a knock at the door at five a.m. and left the bathroom floor to answer it. I came face-to-face with my dad and had to stop myself from getting emotional. "Are you gonna stay a while?" I asked. He nodded. "Wanna stay here?"

I welcomed him inside, and he felt my forehead. "You've got a fever... Did I wake you up?" Dad questioned. I nodded and took the medication the doctors gave me with water. "You don't have a rash, do you? Did you know-."

"The doctor checked, Dad. I don't have a tropical illness," I whispered, "I ate turkey that'd been left out overnight."

It was comforting to have him around. I lay on the couch, and he draped a blanket over me. "Your apartment's nice... How do you like living by yourself?" Dad questioned. I was shocked that he asked. I'd been on my own for nearly three months, and he never once tried to talk to me about my living situation.

"I like it here... I should probably learn how to cook, though," I joked. My dad laughed and messed up my hair.

He went into the kitchen and started throwing stuff out for me. I would've argued with him, but I started feeling sick again, so I went back to the bathroom. When I came out, my dad was gone. I thought he'd left for home, but I saw his suitcase by my bedroom door. I smiled and lay down on the couch to take a nap. When I woke up, he was in the kitchen cutting up vegetables. "Dad? I shouldn't-. Dad?" I called him.

He stopped what he was doing and sat on the coffee table across from me. "What's wrong?" Dad asked.

"I didn't do this because I learned I was adopted," I confessed. Dad frowned and felt my forehead.

"Let's not talk about your emancipation... Let's talk about something else," Dad suggested. I frowned.

"It's a closed adoption... I can't find them-."

"I didn't want you to," Dad interrupted. He stood up and went back to the kitchen. We argued about it once before. I thought he'd tell me if I asked him nicely, but he was still as stubborn as he'd been four months ago.

"Why are you so stubborn? Why can't you tell me who they are?" I asked.

"Don't upset yourself," Dad muttered. I glanced at my phone and looked at all my missed text messages.

"Are they alive?" I asked.

"Stop," Dad warned.

"Do they have other kids? Or am I the only one?" I asked.

He slammed a pot down on the counter. "No more!" Dad yelled. I pulled the blanket over my head and tried to act like my blood wasn't boiling. I wanted to tear into him, but I knew if I did, he'd leave. "You're not mature enough to leave well enough alone, Conner. What makes you think you're ready to know who your biological parents are?"

That was it. I snapped. "You're just scared I'll love someone that's not you!" I screamed. "Why can't you answer a simple question without getting defensive? Why do you insist on being the only person in my world?"

"Because the world is dangerous, Conner! The world will chew you up and spit you out, and they won't apologize! You are naive, and you have no life experience-!"

"Because you made me this way!" I hollered. I wanted to be louder and angrier than he was. I wanted to hurt him. "You made sure I'd never grow up, and now that I'm taking care of myself, you can't stand it!"

"You're barely alive! You gave yourself food poisoning, Conner! And your new manager? He's a crook who isn't qualified to wipe his nose, let alone manage the career of a teen celebrity!" Dad yelled. "And you're so stubborn and childish you don't see how stupid this is! You're throwing a tantrum because I won't give you your way! That's what this whole emancipation thing is about! Do you see how trivial that is?"

I pulled the blanket over my head again and shut him out. "And now you're retreating like a child!" Dad continued.

"Shut up!" I yelled. He won. I hated that he felt the need to rub it in.

I put my headphones in and listened to music to calm down. I stayed like that until my dad finished making dinner. He crouched down in front of me and lifted the blanket just enough for me to see him. He asked me something, but I couldn't hear. I took out my headphones. "Do you think you can eat?" Dad asked. I nodded. Dad made a bowl of soup and sat with me, eating as if we hadn't argued. I could only eat a bit of soup before I started feeling nauseous, so I lay down and turned the tv on. "I sounded like my father... Conner, I shouldn't have done that to you. I can't tell you who your biological parents are... But if something changes, I'll let you know." He reached for my hair and hesitated, and I placed his hand on my forehead. His hands were always cold like a doctor's.

"Conner, when you were a little boy... Before you started acting and singing, you said you wanted to live with me forever... I've pushed you away, haven't I?" Dad asked.

I didn't know how to answer. "You can't protect me from everything, you know? I've gotta grow up. Don't you wanna see if you did an alright job teaching me right from wrong?" I asked. He nodded.

My feelings were hurt, but I didn't want to cause another argument and risk him leaving. "Conner... I-."

"You never yelled at me when I was a kid... Everything's so different now that I'm older," I whispered. Dad ran a hand over his head.

"Conner, I don't-. I can't-... I can't do this again. After this weekend, I need to let go," Dad whispered.

"What are you-."

"I have to let go because I'm not gonna be able to accept this otherwise. We should spend the rest of the year apart," Dad replied. He made an impossible suggestion. I couldn't argue with him because that'd be admitting I still needed him. I didn't say anything. I shut my eyes and pretended I was asleep. I couldn't make any sense of what I felt. The more freedom I had, the more I wanted to be a little kid again. I felt like he pulled the floor out from under me. I felt as if I was losing my dad.

My stomach didn't settle long, and I was back chained to the bathroom by nightfall. Dad knocked on the door, and I didn't answer. "I'm gonna go to the store and see if I can get you some Pedialyte," Dad announced.

I didn't want to talk to him. I especially didn't want to talk to him with my face in a toilet. He was gone less than twenty minutes before he knocked on the door a second time. "I'm going to leave it on the coffee table. Let me know if you need anything," Dad cracked the door to speak to me. I gave him a thumb's up.

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purplesurveys · 1 year ago

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1742

Anything you're looking forward to this month? We have a mental health break next Friday that I am stoked about. Other than that my days are spent dreading my inevitable promotion.

What's the current temperature? It's cold as fuck in my room because the aircon is blasting right in front of my face, but outside it's 26ºC.

Have you or would you ever forage for mushrooms? I haven't and it also doesn't really sound all that interesting to me.

What's something you dislike about spring time? Idk, maybe the fact that I can't relate to it haha...

What's your favorite lollipop flavor? Not a big fan of candies in general. I'd accept whatever lollipop I'm offered but it's not like I'd seek them out ever.

Are you into gardening and what do you enjoy planting? I am not.

What's some flowers you find to be pretty? Peonies.

Would you say you're easy to get along with? It depends on the person, tbh. There are people I know I wouldn't vibe with from the start, and it's not necessarily a bad thing. Maybe we just have a different sense of humor or whatever.

Who did you last hold hands with? Not holding hands per se but I did grab Celeste's arm when we crossed the street a week ago because I was scared lol.

What sounds help you sleep? Talking sounds. It's why I always need to have a vlog on when I turn in.

Do you have a loud or more soft laugh? I mean, I have both. I just choose whatever I use depending on the situation hahaha.

Tell me your best pick up line. I never use them.

What's a song that reminds you of warm weather? Beauty and a Beat by Justin Bieber and Nicki Minaj, cos of the music video haha. Also Slide Away by Miley Cyrus.

Do you have any interest in fairies? Nope.

What's the last refreshing drink you had? Soju.

Do you name your plants? I don't own any plants, but I can imagine myself naming them if I ever got into plants as a hobby.

Do you like to dip your fries in a frosty or ice cream? I guess you can say that! I like dipping mine in a hot fudge sundae :)

Do you prefer staying in cuddled up or going out for a date? Both sound delightful. It depends on what I need on a given day.

Cookies or brownies? Cookies.

What is something you are proud of? My writing.

Are you a fan of musicals? No.

Do you like lemonade? Do you add anything to it? I never get to encounter it and when I do, I mean it's nothing special. I neither like nor dislike it.

Are you more of a fast talker or do you talk more slow? Fast. It only changes if I'm actively thinking while speaking, which can sometimes happen when I'm working and get faced with a question that I'm not sure how to answer right off the bat.

Is there anyone who makes you smile no matter what mood you're in? Honestly, it's hard to imagine not smiling around my best friends unless they do something that directly pisses me off.

What are some inanimate objects or things in general that have the same energy or vibe? I'm not sure if I'm answering the question right, but Monday for me gives off the color red. Tuesday is green, Wednesday is blue, Thursday is gray(???), Friday is yellow.

What is something that is quick to cheer you up? BTS has a grip on me like you wouldn't believe.

Have you ever stargazed with someone? I guess. My class had an overnight stargazing activity in school so you can say I stargazed with the rest of my classmates? Hahaha.

If you were royalty, what would you like to be addressed as? Just my name. I'd 100% be begging people to just call me by my name.

Are there any foods you could eat daily and never get sick of? Probably fries.

Are there any things coming up that you have to travel for? It's not a crazy long travel but I have a concert in November that I have to travel all the way south for. Anything that requires a toll gate is far enough for me so I'm counting that haha.

What was a time when you have laughed so hard you cried? My family and I laughed to high heavens over this TikTok video.

Plan a good day. I'm back in Bangkok, have my Viber notifs on mute, and am not thinking about how many days I have left til I'm back in Manila.

What would you do with $10,000 right now? Keep it safe in my account.

If you had to create an alter ego for yourself, what would they be like and what's their name? They would be a person more confident and prepared for the aforementioned promotion that I'm headed towards. I swear I'm getting out the first chance I get...

What's one of your biggest accomplishments today? Angela planned a last-minute dinner (it was the evening of her birthday eve) so I had to think quickly for a birthday gift hehe. I ended up giving her a self-care kit since she's been stressed with work recently – a dog stuffed toy whose proceeds go to a local shelter with every purchase; a couple of Katinko bottles for when her shoulders or back get sore; and a reed diffuser.

Do you believe in reincarnation? why or why not? No. I just don't find much pleasure or fulfilment thinking of existential stuff like that so I don't bother.

What relative are you closest with? My sister and eldest cousin on my mom's side.

Do you have any recurring dreams? Not really.

What last had you startled? My car hit this extremely, extremely low curb earlier today when I tried to turn towards the gas station haha. Even the gas station attendants got shaken up HAHAHA.

What emotion have you experienced most lately? DREAD. Anxiety. Nausea (not an emotion but still?). Eugh.

Let's say there are no obstacles preventing this.. What would you do for the rest of your life? Travel to every art exhibition in the world. Write about things I'm passionate about. Own an animal shelter.

What last made you feel proud? Seeing Yeontan being brought on stage by Taehyung when he performed on one of the music shows earlier this evening haha. I'm pretty easy to please.

What's an odd phobia someone you know has? Not a phobia per se but the Filipino superstition of pagpag has always struck me as odd. I don't follow it and will not voluntarily do it, but then again everyone drags me to do it nonetheless so I just go with the flow as it's just 5 minutes of my time, haha.

What did you last search online? Zayn Malik's Zap tattoo as my friends and I were talking about tattoos earlier.

Do you have any ghost stories you've experienced? No.

If you were to be a food, what would you be and why? Idk, I don't really match personalities to food.

When did you last dust your home? I'm not in charge of dusting but I did sweep the floor, which is what I usually take care of, earlier this evening before leaving to see some friends.

If you could pick an age to stop aging at, what would you choose? I wouldn't choose any.

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stayathomesurveys · 1 year ago

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172.

How would you spend a day at the beach? Laying out, playing in the ocean. Eating nice snacks! If I'm with friends, taking cute pictures for the 'gram ofc. Just having fun and getting some sun :)

Have you ever experienced altitude sickness? Yes. Very mild, though.

Was the last show you watched a re-run? Yes. I'm currently binge watching Law and Order: SVU. I'm on season 9.

Is there anything, any event, you wish you could remember more clearly? Yeah, a lot of things from my childhood.

When your school has a snow day, how do you spend it? It really never snowed much here. But we would get "snow days" for the little bit of snow, ice, sleet, and flurries that we would get. I would always spend it sleeping, watching TV, and playing in the little bit of snow that we got.

For you, what is the hardest thing about writing? Figuring out what I want to write.

if you could change your gender for a day, would you? Nope.

Do you respond to the people that yell out their car windows at you? No.

What’s your biggest priority right now? Losing weight, getting a job (the job market sucks here I am so upset), and going back to school.

Did you pay attention to anything you were being taught in health class? Yeah.

If you could describe high school in one word, what would it be? Interesting? I don't know.

If you’ve stayed overnight in a hospital, how did you entertain yourself? When I was admitted overnight before and after surgery, I was on a Morphine drip so I mostly slept. I watched TV. My parents and best friend visited me for a little bit. I texted my boyfriend at the time. That's about it.

What does it feel like to fall asleep in someone’s arms? It depends on how you're positioned but it's always felt nice.

Do you recall the first time that you learned the truth about sex? Lol, not really.

Do you need the opinion of others to make yourself feel worthwhile? Sorta :(

What is a common sleeping position for you? I sleep on my stomach with one knee bent and my hands under my face/pillow. Sometimes I fall asleep on my side with my hands tucked in towards my face.

Have you ever rubbed anyone’s feet? Nope.

Is there a food that makes you sick just thinking about it? Italian subs. Although I am slowly getting over my aversion to them! Finally - it's been like 5 years.

What is one thing you fantasize or daydream about doing? Traveling.

Do you know anyone that’s kind of stuck in another generation? I don't know. Sure.

When was the last time you were on a swing set? Last summer?

What would you rather: lethal injection, electric chair, or hanging? Lethal injection.

Have you ever had “perfect attendance” in school? I think I had perfect attendance for ONE quarter. I missed a lot of school.

Do you find extreme body builders’ bodies to be attractive? No.

When was the last time you wore flip-flops? No idea.

Do you/would you own a pair of giant sunglasses? Yeah.

Are your hands unsteady? Sometimes.

Are you envious of anyone’s artistic abilities? Of course.

#survey

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mmoxie · 2 years ago

Text

To Make an Easy Job

I don't know how this is going to sound, but I need to spill my guts about retail. We all hate it, but this isn't going to be about hating it. At least, not in the traditional way. No mention of angry middle-aged women or soft-boiled khaki-shorts dads outside of this sentence disqualifying them. Okay? Let's go.

Nearly four years ago, I left a retail pharmacy job where I did a great deal of work for little genuine benefit. In a county where minimum wage was on the rise, I started beneath it and then, when it became law, upgraded to it. I started as an overnight clerk, stocking shelves and playing Yu-Gi-Oh on my phone with another transplant like myself. He was on the register, I was on the floor, and we both had a thickly-accented laugh at the shitheads who came in to bother us all night.

And that's important, calling them shitheads. Nine in ten weren't coming in to shop, they were coming in to work out some unresolved issues on our shelves. The tenth in ten were pregnant folks who needed a 24 hour pharmacy for emergency reasons.

So already, that's a lot of stress. Then they slashed the store's hours in half, and me and my friend didn't see each other for a while. I went to a new location because the hour budget couldn't support keeping me on staff at that one, and then quit from the new location because working that job without someone to play YGO with all night turned out to be a joyless parade of cigarette sales and bra money.

My wages didn't go up. I left. Took on a new job. Got sick for one day too many. Got fired. Called my old boss who said I was "always welcome on her team." She was no longer leading a team, but she referred me to another old boss, at my first location, who had an opening.

So I was back to playing YGO with my bud. But the place had made him so mad in my absence that he was on his way out to a nearby grocery store. In the meanwhile, I was so badly in need of a raise that I leveraged the time I spent with the company (and the fact that I came back) to promote up to "shift lead."

I put on a vest and had a panic attack for a year and a half, and then I was fired for an expression of dismay that you can't say on TV, spoken in reaction to a former coworker being racist, again.

A three-month job hunt landed me at a large grocery chain. The kind that sells groceries on one end and furniture on the other. I was looking for an overnight freight job so that I wouldn't have to do a lot of socializing, and even though they interviewed me for one, they told me they didn't have one open- but they did have a "garden clerk" position available.

I took it. I grew up around plants. I wasn't the most useful hand at my great-grandparents' farm, but I had helped water the blueberries and the collards. I had a healthy interest in plants, even if I didn't have any complete formal education on the matter. I took Latin in high school (because the French teacher was very suddenly fired) and that helped me understand the scientific names of plants- which I could turn into care regimens. Lots of Asteraceae out in the garden center, and if I could understand what that kind of plant needs, I'd lead a pretty comfortable life in the garden.

Well, I was wrong about that. About the comfortable life thing, I mean. No amount of learning can prepare you for being led by someone you don't trust. My boss had been hired a month before me, and- with me having just been a manager myself- had a hard time with anything that wasn't subordinate kowtowing.

I listened to what he said, thought critically about it, and offered practical solutions. But they weren't his solutions, or the solutions that his boss suggested- so, even if they achieved an identical end, the methodology coming from me was poison to him, and he made a big show of gagging on it.

And then he disappeared for eight months.

I still don't know what happened, but after not getting along for the better part of the year, he developed a mysterious health problem and stopped showing up without warning. The schedule was marked "leave of absence," and it also left me as the only person assigned to work in the garden.

So I started doing what I wanted. The autonomy made my heart feel like it had grown wings. I was fixing holes in fences, restoring damaged fixtures, getting a missing panel in the ceiling replaced so that it'd stop raining on the register, and- let's be real- missing out on a lot of necessary work to keep the department running, because they neither alerted me to the need for it, or trained me about it.

Our shelves grew bare, and they asked me why. When I told them I didn't know, they decided they didn't appreciate the truth. Rather than train me, they distracted a middle-manager from running the department and sent him out to pick up on little, computery jobs that I'd never heard of, in the year that I'd been too busy watering plants and hauling thousand-pound pallets of soil around.

Eventually my manager came back. Demoted to cashier as the only way of keeping him on shift. I later found out that sometimes they'll cut deals like that, just to keep their retention percentage over a certain threshold. The demotion certainly didn't make his attitude any better, and he took it out on customers. He was fired within a few months.

Meanwhile, they were asking me to promote to his old job. Remembering my promotion at the old store, I declined, and instead took a bit of a "side-grade" that would bring me into the store and out of the weather.

I grew to miss the weather immediately. Now my world was rolling out of bed and unpacking a heavy pallet of hammers, plungers, shop-vacs and spray paint for nine hours a day. All the peace and comfort of watering to keep something alive had been replaced with the soulless analog of "make sure this number goes up, and that number goes down."

It couldn't last. But before I could leave it, something unprecedented happened. For the first time in 20 years, my section was being renovated! Wow!

...What do you mean they're not sending a team in?

Shifts start at four in the morning? I'll be leading a team so we can do it ourselves? We're physically removing two aisles from the store, and rebuilding the other nine by hand?

Okay. Sure. Let's go.

It was around this time I started to have trouble with the department head. We won't spend too much time on her- the important thing is, she did a small amount of physical labor, spent the rest of her shift writing emails about it, and then grew completely outraged when I told her that she would understand the team's actions better if, instead of arbitrarily assigning us new tasks every day based on her emails, she worked with the team to understand how we were flowing through the remodel.

So I've got a bit of a mouth on me. At least I didn't swear this time.

I didn't get fired, and we finished the renovation. By then I was absolutely sick to death of working in hardware, and the garden manager position had been vacated once again.

So this time, I took it. I took it, and I reflected on three years of mistakes and mismanagement and neglect and failure-to-train, and I said "okay, let's change how we do this."

I immediately got in trouble for doing my own thing regardless of the positive results.

So I fought, and fought again. I described the effort I made and why I made it to people who didn't care, and never would, until they gave me a scrap of my autonomy back.

After a few months- once Christmas had passed and I had rebuilt the garden by hand, with limited help from the few people who could be spared for a couple hours at a time to tinker on it with me- they started hiring people into my old position.

New garden clerks. And I was in charge of them.

Things would be different for them than it had been for me. This time the person leading them had experience, knew what to expect, and had been prepared. This time we knew exactly how much the business was going to let us down, and we could have our landing all planned out for when they inevitably buckled and failed.

Every day, they come in and water plants. They occasionally compost the plants that slip our attention- in a yard of thousands, sometimes a few 4" cups will run dry in the process of watering them all. They move out a pallet of new freight every now and then- bags of soil, some rakes and shovels, sprinklers and valves.

They aren't being asked to be their own manager. When they need me for clarity, or for a heavy lift, or to handle someone who's taking out their pent up aggression on our cashier, I'm right there.

When I left the old pharmacy, I wanted an easier job.

I never got one, but I made three. And as they come and go- which is something you're expected to do, working retail- they aren't in a hurry to disappear, and the people coming in to fill their roles aren't afraid of what's coming.

I'm tired, and I'll be tired for the rest of my life, but I feel like I carved out an oasis deep in the heart of retail labor, where they really can do the amount of work they agreed to do, be fairly paid for it, and go home with their backs unbent and spirits high.

They can, not me. But at least someone is, and that's what I wanted-

To make an easy job.

#retail #la problema es capitalismo #long read

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cancerbiophd · 4 years ago

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Why am I so afraid of professors? They're all so smart and cool and I always feel like I'm not good enough, especially when they appear to be irked or treat me coldly/with hostility. It makes me feel stupid and unadequate and unworthy. I'm terribily uneasy every time I have to interact with them. Even if I studied hard and I know I'm saying something correct i tend to get unsure and submissive, like in a very 'i-hope-i'm-doing-this-right' and 'please-don't-hurt-me' way. Of course this affects my exams because it looks like I'm not sure of what I'm saying... and the professor gets irked even more because they obviously think I haven't studied and I'm wasting their time. I hate myself for it. Please, do you have any tips to overcome this?

Hi Anon, ohh I know that experience very well. I also used to be absolutely terrified of professors when I was in college. Raising my hand to ask a question in lecture? Nuh uh! Going to office hours? NUH UH. I had huuuge anxiety regarding all that.

But it slowly got better (though it took longer than I--and my grades--would’ve hoped), so I have some ideas on how you can also become more comfortable around professors. Feel free to try any you feel comfortable doing, and also keep in mind this is in no way a comprehensive list of ideas, and that everything will take baby steps and most importantly, time.

Firstly, know it’s not your fault. I’m not a therapist or anything so take this with a grain of salt, but it seems to me that something traumatizing may have happened in your past/still happening in your present to create this current feeling of fear around authority figures, especially if one of your constant fears is being physically hurt by them. If that seems to ring true, I highly recommend seeking the advice of a professional therapist, as they can help you find more permanent solutions through these types of obstacles. I think seeking a therapist would be a very kind thing you can do to take care of yourself because, most importantly, you deserve to live a life free from fear, and secondly, it’s affecting your day-to-day life (ie. your grades and mental well-being).

Secondly, I really hope you have a really good experience with a professor one day. A professor who is so kind and so passionate about helping you that it’s a huge step in healing and growing. To get you started, I highly recommend following one of my favorite blogs and professors on tumblr @xiaq. They’re seriously amazing and just, an all around good person.

Sit near the front of the classroom/lecture hall. Not only will this help in paying attention/retaining information during class, but just by being closer to your professor will help slowly ease you into being more comfortable in their presence. You may also feel more comfortable asking questions in class, as you won’t have a wall of students turning around to look back at you as you speak (I know this gave me huge anxiety).

Have a study-buddy for each class who you can go to office hours with. Experiences are always less intimidating when you’re with another person. Another bonus of a study-buddy is that you can also ask them any questions you have, and thus possibly skip having to interact with the professor all together (which would be a good thing if the professor really is being unhelpful and rude).

Going off of that, surround yourself with people who inspire you, specifically those with are very comfortable around professors. As social creatures, we oftentimes will passively pick up the mannerisms of those around us. I used to be suuuuper timid and shy, but my confidence grew during high school and college after I became friends with more confident people.

Seek out a TA first (if possible). TAs are students too (they’re just in graduate school), and they may come across as less intimidating. Heck, I could’ve been your TA :)

Spend more time with professors or TAs, even passively. Regular exposure is the fastest way to having something feel “normal”, after all. Ideas of doing this include: volunteering at a research lab, getting a part-time job on campus somewhere that has regular interaction with professors or TAs, volunteering at university-sponsored events with professors, hanging out at community learning centers where TAs volunteer as free tutors (if your university has them), signing up for smaller-sized classes (more professor interaction), or even doing homework in public study lounges near professor offices (these areas have the bonus of usually being more quiet than libraries).

Do something even more intimidating than interacting with a professor. Ok here me out: Once you accomplish something that’s even scarier, your newly gained confidence will be like, “Wow, if I could do something that’s so much more intimidating, then talking to my professor isn’t so bad in comparison!” What you do is up to you, but it should be something that’s obviously safe, but challenging enough so that it’s just a little bit scary, and in the end you’ll be more confident for having accomplished it. Like performing in public, or running for a leadership position for a club you’re in, or working a part-time job/volunteering opportunity that gives you the chance to interact with lots of diverse people.

Know you are not being a burden when you ask a professor for help. A) It’s their literal job to teach. You are no more a burden asking a professor for help on their class than you are going to the doctor’s office when you’re sick. As a student who is paying thousands of dollars in tuition (or someone is paying that for you), you are the reason why that professor has a job and a salary. So they need to do their job well, right? B) Teaching is also their passion. There are a variety of career paths they could’ve taken (especially for those with a PhD), and staying in academia is usually by far one of the hardest and most competitive paths, so the fact that they’re still there means that they really do enjoy what they do.

But know also that professors are human. Sometimes they may be having a bad day that’s unrelated to their students, and may seem a bit more tense and terse. We’ve all been there, right? If a professor or my boss seems a bit snippy that day, unless they explicitly say to me “Julia, I am so mad at you right now”, I chalk it up to something else happening in their lives that has nothing to do with me. My mental wellbeing has greatly improved by adopting this way of thinking: “never assume another person’s intentions and only accept what they explicitly tell you.”

Say more “thank you”s instead of “I’m sorry”. This moves things away from erroneously putting all the blame on you towards being appreciative of the other person’s time and energy. Instead of “I’m so sorry I don’t understand this from class” try saying “Thank you for taking the time to teach this again to me”. See how different the vibes are? And how much more positive you feel by saying the second one? The other person will also feel more positive about the interaction too. If you catch yourself instinctively saying “I’m sorry” (because I know it’s a habit that’s hard to shake), quickly follow up with a “thank you” as well: “I’m sorry I don’t understand this from class but thank you for taking the time to teach this again to me.”

Lastly, be patient and kind with yourself as this will take time. Overcoming something that gives us anxiety takes exposure, patience, and time; it won’t happen overnight. Take baby steps at first, and it’s ok if you just can’t do something today. That’s alright, you can try tomorrow.

Also, if anyone who has gone through something similar has any advice or words of support to share, please feel free to reblog or leave a reply!

Good luck anon, I hope things get easier for you ❤️

#Anonymous #college advice

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kiatheinsomniac · 5 years ago

Text

Chapter III: Rooftop Talks

Part one: here Part two: here

Every student was gathered in the hall. (Y/n) looked around oddly, taking a mental headcount. There were only twenty-five students. That was one class.

They had just met the principal, Crawford Starrick who was standing on a podium and had just announced that they were allowed to have their first day to themselves in order to familiarise themselves with the building and the grounds. Perfectly timed, he asked if anyone had any questions. A few hands went up, along with (Y/n)’s.

“So, do we get to go out on the weekends at all?” Asked a boy who looked strikingly similar to Evie. (Y/n) concluded that this must be her twin, Jacob.

“If you’re willing to make the walk.” The principal replied. (Y/n)’s brows shot up, recalling how long the drive had been through the woods; she couldn’t imagine walking that distance. She was called on next.

“Is this everyone? I mean, it’s only one class unless we’re being split into two smaller classes.” She pointed out her observation.

“Each student here is handpicked for success.” The reactions to this were a mix of straightening backs with pride and scoffing, “We want you all to achieve your very best and thought a singular class would better achieve that.” He explained. (Y/n) nodded her head but something about it felt odd. Just one class? Then again, it could be down to the school being new and having to prove its worth before it could accept more students. “Kassandra.” He called on the Greek who had her hand up.

“So what aren’t we allowed to do?” She questioned, not wanting to get into an argument with staff over something she didn’t know.

“Break curfew, start fights, truant, steal, fail to hand in assigned tasks on time, disobey staff, have mobile phones.” The Greek smiled sweetly.

“Ok.” Was her simple answer. (Y/n) squinted her eyes at her slightly. She seemed far too happy with that answer. Why was she smiling so much? Why did her eyes light up?

With no more questions left, they were dismissed to familiarise themselves with the grounds. (Y/n) made her way over to Kassandra, curious. The Greek grabbed her hand and went running down the hall. A few other students watched this, curious before looking to their peers and shrugging, running after them.

When Kassandra finally stopped, they were standing at the top of a staircase by a set of old rusty doors. (Y/n) turned around to see that they had company. Claudia, Aveline and two other boys who (Y/n) didn’t know were all behind Kassandra and herself.

There was a loud creak and snap. Kassandra had kicked the door open, breaking the worn-down lock inside while keeping the doors intact. There was glass on the outside of the metal framing but it was so overgrown with moss that it was difficult to see what was outside. Was this some sort of balcony?

As soon as the doors were opened, it was revealed to be the roof. They all walked out onto it, chattering among themselves while (Y/n) made her way to the edge of the far wall. She could see the lake that gave Vermere Lake Grammar School its name. It was off in the distance, past the extravagant gardens and field with a few layers of trees blocking it from the view if you were on the ground. It appeared to be a clearing in the middle of the sea of green trees and had a stream trickling into it.

(Y/n) took the opportunity to look around the area from a higher viewpoint which she stood on. Trees and trees and trees covered the hills around the school. The colour was quickly becoming sickening to look at everywhere she turned.

Her (e/c) orbs flickered to the gardens and the sports field. She prayed that she wouldn't have to participate in any form of physical education. She had always been far more academic than athletic and saw it as a waste of time - she could be studying something far more useful in her opinion. The gardens were wonderful and defined by tidy gravel paths. The hedges and trees were trimmed to perfection and the colourful pop of the flowerbeds were a nice change from the constant, droning green. There were statues scattered in a grid among the gardens and a large fountain stood proudly in the epicentre of it all. The water was running, putting on a repetitive show, sunlight reflecting off the water and making it sparkle, while statues of cherub angels and mermaids were in the centre. It was a very flamboyant school, indeed.

She shuffled a little closer to the edge before a pair of hands carefully held her sides in a tight, yet cautious grip, causing her to jolt slightly with surprise.

“Careful, don’t fall.” A male voice spoke from behind her. She turned around to see that it was a boy with long brown hair which he swept back into a ponytail, tied with red satin. His skin was softly sunkissed and he had rich brown eyes with golden tones glimmering amongst them. He wore a deep blue high-necked jumper which defined his torso and was tucked into a pair of black trousers which were accompanied by a black Louis Vuitton belt and black suede boots. She took a step from the edge, which inevitably brought her body closer to his, before making her way past him.

She flashed a shy smile, blushing a little at how he'd held her hips, "Thank you." She managed out before making her way over to Claudia and Aveline seeing as she knew them the best. She thought over leaving so abruptly like that. Perhaps he wanted to get to know the other students here too - after all, most people here didn't know one another. She found herself feeling odd and liking how touchy some of the other students were - the way Kassandra had grabbed her hand, the way Arno had grabbed her sides, etcetera. She never got much affection from her parents and never had any friends to give her any either. She quite liked the contact. It was comforting.

What unnerved her though, was the realisation that she was so touch-starved that she was enjoying this from people that she hardly knew. It was quite a shocking sudden realisation, really; something that she didn't want to admit to so she pushed the thought away. She would be getting to know them all soon enough anyway, right? Well, aside from Cesare and Lucrezia. She didn't plan on associating herself with those two.

She hadn't even been here for a whole day and she was already finding out things about herself that she had failed to notice in the past. It only made her lap up all these new changes even more, finally free of that old routine which she was constantly restrained by back at her home.

(Y/n) watched as a blonde male student went running for the lake, followed by an olive-skinned boy who resembled Kassandra a lot.

"Oh, I think they're going to jump in." She pointed out as she gestured her hand towards the two students that were sprinting across the sports field and making a beeline for the lake.

"Of course he is." The Greek girl sighed, a smile on her lips as she watched one of the two boys in particular. "The taller one's my little brother, Alexios; but, a lot of his friends call him Deimos." She paused for a while, her smile lingering as she witnessed her brother and the blonde student strip off as many layers as they could (while staying decent) before plunging off the small pier and into the cold water, "I never liked his friends back home, they were terrible for him. If he's mean to you: don't take it to heart." She rested a hand on (Y/n)'s shoulder to express her sincerity, "Those friends of his made him an asshole but I'm hoping that he will change now that he's not around them anymore. Mater hopes so too."

"Are you here for a change too?" The ebony-haired female prompted, wanting to get her own story across int he process.

"Because I tried to defend him from his friends, I ended up making a lot of enemies back at home." Shrugged, "I've always been one to punch first and ask questions later." (Y/n)'s eyes roved over Kassandra's arms to see how muscular she was. She definitely seemed like she would win a fight. "I suppose I'm looking to try and change myself in that aspect - learn to negotiate. But I know it won't happen overnight." She laughed at herself.

"I mostly accepted the application here because I wanted a change and I don't really have anyone at home." (Y/n) expressed, "I'd wake up and go to my school where I never had any friends, study all break and lunch, go home to paint or read for half an hour, study until dinner then get in the shower and go to sleep." She explained, "I was always home alone a lot because my parents work all the time. I've never been close to them. . . They didn't even drop me off at the airport. . . The family driver was the only one with me. . ." She spoke nonchalantly but Kassandra looked liked like she was on the verge of heartbreak.

For the Greek girl, her family was one of the most important things in her life, her source of happiness. It made her sad to know that her classmate didn't have anyone at all in the world.

"Well, you have friends now." She beamed, throwing an arm around her shoulder, "A lot of people here seem to like you already." Her gaze went back to her brother and the other student who were still swimming in the cold water and her lips tugged into a frown, "He's going to get sick if he stays in there too long. . . I should go get him." And with that, she left and (Y/n) made her way over to Claudia who was standing under a large greenhouse which was on the roof, gesticulating a lot with her hands while Aveline, the boy in blue from earlier, and the other guy were all paying attention to her.

". . . Just imagine it!" She spoke expressively, "Some lights, some chairs, pillows and blankets! If we clean up the glass and the floor and maybe add a few little flowerpots and trinkets on the shelves! This could be an awesome hangout! And, judging by the doors on the way up here, no one comes up here, so we can keep it as a thing between people we like."

"That's quite a cool idea, actually," Aveline spoke from where she was standing inside the rather large greenhouse, a frown tugged at her full lips, "But it would be nicer with some music."

"I bought my guitar with me." The boy that (Y/n) had yet to meet raised his hand in contribution. He had an Italian accent which made (Y/n)'s eyes flicker between him and Claudia, making note of their similarities. She concluded that this was Ezio, Claudia's brother. He, like Arno, suited long brown hair which was tied back - but he had shorter parts that fell loose and framed his angular face neatly. He wore a white hoodie with dark red joggers and white trainers. She wondered why he was dressed so casually until she realised that he and his sister must have had to wake up early to catch the plane and he would have wanted to be comfortable for the journey.

"I'm going to miss my music - I really hate this 'no phones' rule." The one who (Y/n) had briefly spoken to earlier piped up, "I mean, in a controlled environment like a boarding school, they're not exactly going to get in the way of us learning." He shrugged as he leaned against the glass, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Good point." (Y/n) agreed. Ezio turned his eyes to her, not having noticed her before. The Italian raised one of his brows in amusement, a flirtatious and teasing smile tugging at his scarred lips.

"You're quiet." He pointed out.

"Oh, leave her alone, stronzo. She's not one of your easy girls back home and I don't want you sleeping with my friends." Claudia snapped at her older brother, placing her hands on her hips to try and show her authority. Her older brother smiled at this while (Y/n)'s (e/c) eyes widened.

"Whoa, that escalated quickly." She held up her hands, shocked at how the conversation had gone from him teasing her about being quiet to Claudia telling him to not try it on with her.

"Oh, believe me, it would have escalated either way." The female Auditore rolled her chestnut eyes, "I'm sure that as soon as he said that, he would have mentioned something about getting you to moan loudly." She shot an accusing gaze at her brother who tossed his head around, considering his answer with a playful smile.

"Guilty." He confessed, his eyes going back to (Y/n) who felt quite singled out. The other boy clicked his tongue.

"Talking dirty to a girl as soon as you meet her isn't going to get her in your bed." He corrected.

"It isn't?" Ezio shot back, "Oh please, master seducer Arno, share your knowledgable ways with me?"

"Alright, we're leaving." Aveline rolled her eyes, amusement playing on her lips as Claudia followed her and she took (Y/n) by the arm to lead her away as well, "We don't want any part of your guy talk."

"Is your brother always like that?" (Y/n) asked Claudia.

"Yes." Was her blunt reply, "But don't misinterpret him; he respects women a lot even though he sleeps with all the pretty ones he sees. When my ex cheated on me, he broke his nose and when his ex got a new boyfriend, he made sure that he'd be good to her with a heavy threat."

"That's. . . violent but also incredibly sweet?" (Y/n) laughed while she glanced over her shoulder to where Arno and Ezio were having an in-depth discussion about the best way to seduce a woman. She rolled her eyes before following Aveline back downstairs, hoping that she wasn't still the topic of their conversation.

She decided that she wanted to explore the school building.

#assassins creed #assassins creed au #assassins creed modern au #x reader #assassins creed x reader #ezio auditore #kassandra #arno dorian #alexios #highschool au #modern au #the elites

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