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hotluncheddie · 10 months ago

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omg it's been said before but your autistic Steve series is so good so life affirming so precious to me..... and so I would like to share my own thoughts on the matter...... Steve who did sports bc he had so much excess energy!! and now he gets the zoomies all the time and needs NEEDS to get outside and run around when the weather is nice...... Steve who thinks he's unforgivably strange and unlovable without his perfectly crafted mask and Robin who says she likes him better without it!!!!.... Steve hyperfixations (feat Steve who reads and frequents the library my beloved, he's so casually curious it just makes sense with his characterization I think)...... Steve full body stimming with Eddie or Robin and feeling amazing!!!!!...... Steve who has set up his space Exactly The Way He Likes It.....

love and light to you ♥️💋🥞🏄🏻

lovely 2jug2head!!! hello!!! ur so sweet!!!

but autistic steve!!! my love!! my guy!!! yesssss!!!! these are all so good! so sweet and lovely and perfect!!! ty for sending me this!!!

(sorry this reply took a little to get too, i've been on my freak shit but finally got few ideas down for u <3)

i think steve would take time learning what stimming and being overstimulated and understimulated means. i think after the upside-down especially, but a lot before that too, he got too used to detaching, kind of separating from his body in order to survive. so now, sometimes, he gets these itches and urges and weird feelings and he just doesn’t know what to do about it. [and i think sport definitely helped him in the past, but i dunno if he would make that connection right away.]

but, he watches robin flap her arms with her sweater sleeves covering her hands. and watches eddie get fucking breathless head banging to a song. he sees robin skip to his car at the end of a shift, looking up at the sky and letting out a 'AHH!' with so so much feeling, cheeks flushed and eyes bright that the day is done, getting in and fiddling with the radio like it’s no big deal. he watches eddie jiggle his leg and bite his rings and stand up and pace when he's talking about something he loves. and steve tries them.

he tries all of them.

he fists his hands and shakes them until something dislodges in his chest, till he can finally take a full breath. he sings loudly along to bruce springsteen and wham in his car in the mornings, sometimes not ever really singing, just making noise. he jumps around his room with robin when she plays blondie, he asks eddie to show him how to head bang, tries it and laughs and kisses him breathless when the song ends. he gives robin his keys and takes off running in a lap around the building after work, sometimes near sprinting, sometimes circling five, six times, going till he's panting and the faces of all the people he had to see that day are washed away, until he can't feel the plastic on his fingers, can't smell the bleach or the too much cologne some guy used. until he's reset, until he's him again, not theirs, not who anyone wants him to be. until he feels good again, lets himself feel good.

sometimes, now, he jiggles his leg the same way eddie does, at the same time, until robin says she has to move 'feel fuckin' seasick over here with you two goblins.' and eddie just laughs. and steve can curl up into his side, if he wants, can pick up eddies hand and bite his rings if he feels like it, eddie would let him, maybe call him cute, wouldn't judge him. neither of them would, if he did that, if he did more. they would never, and its so nice.

["Steve who thinks he's unforgivably strange and unlovable without his perfectly crafted mask" ;-; that's my fcuking GUY. he would and its so :(( !!!! ]

but yeah, robin would hate that fake plastic smile he puts on to mask sometimes. and she'd tell him, with so much love. 'stop it. show me you.' because she just wants to be with steve.

but she’s so wonderful, he just, she gets it. sometimes things that he didn’t even know were bothering him will build and he’ll snap and rant and moan to finally get it all out. lungs heaving as he empties everything out before her. but she’ll just look at it, and seem to place it all in a way that makes sense, a way that’s small and fits in his pocket. she’ll say ‘woah yeah, that seems like a lot / would be stressful / i’m not surprised you're overwhelmed’ and it’s just. it’s so simple. he’s seen, he’s listened too and validated. it still makes him pause, in stunned silence, and it’s like there’s a plaster placed on his heart with every instance that it happens. sometimes it seems to strike such a chord it's like it's hitting a deep wound that he buried inside, a scab finally healing and falling away. sometimes it makes him sob in her arms, overwhelmed and amazed and so so moved by this person he's met, this wonderful angelic creature that he gets to call his.

the next time he has his super masked, customer service face on when its just the two of them, she threatens to bite him. and steve smiles for real, laughs, feels another plaster sticking over the others.

and steve library frequenter yes yes!! i agree that he is curious and practical and i think a hands on kind of guy! so i think he goes to the library and gets books about cars. i think he likes learning about how to fix his, trying to understand what could go wrong, how it happens, what you do in different scenarios. i think that's something him and eddie and wayne bond over, helping to fix their cars. steve and eddie even work together to do up wayne's van a little, getting it a new bumper and a couple parts scavenged at the junkyard. it's fun for him to work out what's missing, what’s changed, how and why and then putting it into practice. taking something apart and putting it back together. makes him feel proud of himself, something he really doesn't feel often. makes his brain zone in and flow and focus for a couple hours and it just feels so nice, its a happy time for him.

also, speaking of special interests - ✨sport stats✨. steve can name the players of all the basketball teams currently playing professionally, likes watching the tactics shows that come on before and after the games. likes talking at eddie and explaining why its actually really cool that they swapped out that player to give this new guy a chance, he's big news, a young up and comer and has a really interesting play style, its gonna work well with how their current manger organises the court. and eddie just smiles at him, squeezing steves hand in his lap and trying to understand what he sees on screen, follow along (he struggles to take in all the information, it's just not his thing. but it makes him so happy when he watches steve watch.) and steves happy little keens when something interesting happens, mindlessly fiddling with eddie’s fingers and tapping his other hands fingers against his knee, 1, 2, 3, 2, 4, 2. relaxed and focused and sometimes he rocks when it gets really tense and eddies heart bursts.

because it wasn't always like that, it was a struggle and a near pleading for eddie to just get steve to tell him what he likes, talk to him, get to know him. to just let eddie in. because eddie wanted to know everything and steve just didn't know how to deal with that. why would eddie care? no one ever listens to him. he's embarrassing and annoying and gets to loud and eddie doesn't like sports so why would steve tell him anything? it took soft words and gentle encouragement and reassurance again and again that he's listening, he wants to listen, wants to know. 'always, always wanna listen to what you have to say stevie.' so when steve comes over to the trailer after work, talking about the latest switch they announced in the paper, how last nights points shifted the league around and now he doesn't even know who's going to win, isn't that cool? eddie fucking beams because this is his boy. his bright, beautiful, exited baby and he’s talking to eddie, he's letting eddie see him.

steve and his space though. thinking very much about that. he doesn’t have the strictest schedule, he’s learning that sometimes its okay to leave the sheets for another couple days, that the dust can settle for another week before he needs to wipe it away. but some things are just, they just have to be right. he needs to know where things are, needs the important stuff in the same place every day so he doesn't forget. needs his products in the bathroom out and in order so he can keep track of when something needs replacing, so he's not left without something he needs. wants this one specific pillow at night, and one for between his knees and a duvet on year round, needs it to feel warm and safe and right in his bed.

and his clothes, its not even about the sensory stuff for him, like yeah most of his tops are soft, his jeans pretty worn in. he has some really old sweatshirts that are special, that come out on the worst days. but it's also about how clothes look, how they make him feel. he want his jeans to fit right, sit right on his shoes. wants his shirts to make his shoulders look nice, make him feel comfortable and confident and like a normal fucking person who can exist in the world. its another part of the mask, maybe. but it works and its his and most of the time he thinks he looks good. and that's okay. he's learning and its healthy and its practical and it helps.

but he also adores wearing eddies t-shirts. when he's at home all day or to sleep at night. especially if eddies not there, when steve misses him, when he wants him. steve wears eddies t-shirts to bed. they're all ones eddies left after staying, they're old and soft and the tags have been cut out and they smell like eddie. like his eddie. like he's there. steve loves it, wraps himself up in it, helps him feel soothed and taken care of even if he's alone, maybe its a little sad, makes him feel embarrassed, too much. but he's learning not to care.

sometimes eddie talks to him and touches him in a certain special way that makes steve feel so so foggy and taken care of and amazing. so, if eddie's not there but he craves that foggy feeling, steve wears eddies t-shirts and he speaks to himself like eddie would and he makes himself dinner and looks after himself and tucks himself into bed and rubs the fabric of the collar against his nose. and tries not to feel embarrassed if he needs more, if he has to suck on his fingers/thumb for a while, clutching the fabric in his hand. tries to let himself whimper or even cry a little if he needs, at how nice it feels, how gooey and needy he can allow himself to get. accept it as part of himself, that eddie likes it, still likes him, still loves him. just something he needs sometimes. and steve falls asleep, wearing eddies t-shirt.

gonna tag a few people who might want to see, hope that's okay? wanna spread him around and show him off!! look at him!!! our best guy!!!

@pearynice @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @spectrum-spectre @just-a-tiny-void @steventhusiast @cherrychapsticksteve @lil-gremlin-things @finntheehumaneater @irethsune

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cyber-corp · 10 months ago

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By the time I'm posting this, it will be January 26th, commonly known as Australia Day where I'm from. A country known for its sweeping plains, unique fauna and the PM fucking off during a nationwide crisis.

I think, despite all Australia's long-standing issues, there are some things about it worth celebrating the culture. Specifically, the music!

Here are some of (what I think) to be some of the most quintessential Australian albums to listen to:

Midnight Oil - Diesel and Dust (1987): Quite possibly the most Aussie album from quite possibly the most Aussie band. The biggest song off of this album, Beds are Burning, is about Aboriginal Australians being forcibly removed from their land, and the lead singer Peter Garrett is really outspoken about justice towards Australia's native peoples, even being in Parliament at one point. Listen if you want to hear what Rage Against the Machine would be like if they were a new wave band and regularly consumed Oak chocolate milk.

INXS - Kick (1987): If the UK had new wave, Australia had pub rock. Artists defined by their songs being so infectious you can remember while you're smashed on seven bottles of Tooheys Extra Dry (kidding. it's called pub rock because that's where they'd play their sets. in pubs). INXS is quite possibly the pub rock band, the genuine article, and this album is a nice gateway into their music; Punchy, upbeat, and memorable riffs for days. (Songs like Need You Tonight and New Sensation for a good idea). Listen if you like Duran Duran or The Cars.

Kylie Minogue - Fever (2001): GOD, how do I introduce Kylie. This country's shining grace. The superstar in our backyard. Our very own Princess of Pop. This album just extrudes that gleam and optimism that'd you find in a lot of Y2K dance-pop music, and I absolutely love it. Listen if you like Discovery-era Daft Punk or Grace Jones.

The Avalanches - Since I Left You (2000): My personal favourite off this list. It might not be the most "Aussie", but I think it makes up for it in its ethereal tone and sampling techniques. One song might just be made up of just one sample, while another might be made up of 50, (Frontier Psychiatrist was originally made up of 28 samples), but it's all tied together by this collective lofi sound. Listen if you like DJ Shadow, Portishead, or The Chemical Brothers.

Regurgitator - Unit (1997): There was this period in the 90's where Australian alt-rock went fucking berzerk, and Regurgitator was one of those bands. Everyday Formula opens with "Everyday I shit into the sea" and ! (Song Formerly Known As) is about not going out to parties and staying at home. Listen if you'd like Gary Numan mixed with the subject matter of early Weezer.

Spiderbait - Grand Slam (1999): Spiderbait was another one of the alt-rock outlets that got really popular despite being really vocal about the hypocrisy of the industry at large. This album contains a wide variety of influences, like 60's bubblegum on Glockenpop (song about the needless commodification of music. their most popular song and highest-earning single of that year. lol), pop punk on Dinner Time and hard rock on Shazam! A pretty good all-rounder made brilliant by vocalist Kram. Listen if you like Green Day or No Doubt.

Empire of the Sun - Walking on a Dream (2008): I put this one on because the cover is really funny, but then I listened to the album and I got a sense of bittersweet nostalgia listening to it. A mix of disco, dance-rock and funk (We Are The People is a good example) make for something that made me wish I was 7 again. Listen if you like Prince or Let's Dance-era Bowie.

TISM - Machiavelli and the Four Seasons (1995): TISM (short for This Is Serious Mum) are a fucking disgrace to this country. They are such a bunch of yobbo cunts that I can't believe they managed to get anywhere past 90 on the charts. Wankers like them deserve to be dragged out on stage and beat to a pulp viciously, to the ravenous delight of the crowd. Don't listen to this album and don't listen to Greg! The Stop Sign!! Listen if you're a masochist, maybe.

AC/DC - Let There Be Rock (1977): Ah yes, good ol Acca. The ultimate dad band. You could put any of their albums on this list because they all sound the exact same, but I put this one on because I prefer Bon Scott's vocals. The title track feels like it goes forever, but in a way where you wish it didn't end. Some nice fashioned high voltage rock'n'roll. Listen if you like Black Sabbath.

There are way more that I could have put on here (Gurrumul, Frenzal Rhomb, Powderfinger, Silverchair, The Presets, The Chats, Men At Work, Tame Impala etc.) but I think you could probably discover them in your own time. In the meantime, here is the very culmination of Australian music. Nearly 50 years has led up to this being made.

Fuckin skitz cunt.

#australia #australian music #midnight oil #inxs #kylie minogue #the avalanches #regurgitator #tism #ac/dc #the best piece of australian art is democracy manifest #just so u know #music #gecko boy #SoundCloud

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