#((behind the chair ;; about))
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#they take a huge space in my mind#btc fnaf#behind the codes#five nights at freddy's#fnaf#springtrap#ballora#treating them like they're oblivious and i'm their god#'THEY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I PREPARED FOR THEM...'#btc springtrap#btc ballora#my art#nightmarionne would throw a chair at me if he saw me posting anything about these two lmfao#oh shit.....#ANYWAY this deserves to be on the main acc <3
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Whumpee who always has a blindfold on. They don't like it, but eventually they get used to it. Whumper loves them jumpy, dependent and vulnerable. And they just look so sweet when they don't know what's coming.
#whump#my writing#creepy whumper#whump writing#intimate whumper#whump prompt#whumpee#whumper#blindfolded#one of my favourite whumpees is the whumpee who never gets to take the blindfold off#they were told their hands would be cut off or their eyes would be destroyed if they even thought about taking it off#and they are to terrified to try#i think whumpees look very pretty with a blindfold on#blindfold collar hands tied behind their back or secured snugly to a chair as they listen to whumper getting ready for their session#it just hgghhghhn#enrichment. in My enclosure
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imagine Edwin's surprise when he realized that Charles is left-handed...
#dead boy detectives#he'd probably have some questions about how discipline changed overall but like damn they didn't tie your left arm behind the chair?#agency discussion#<- perhaps my text post tag...
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I love that the Chairmen are like the lameos of The Strip. Like it just says so much about how the Boot Riders were that they are just so fine being like Vegas cool guys.
Everyone at The Tops sans Benny is content, happy and fine with how things play out. They just like having food, women and something to do. Like occasionally they have to use some of their tribal warrior skills when threats like the Courier pop up but they are like if you took mountain lions and gave them a kitty spa day and now they refuse to leave.
Of course, the other families think they’re boring like one of them is literally eating bitches and The Tops just has the worst Wasteland’s Got Talent contestants as premiere acts.
#sorry they are just silly like they don’t give a fuck#they like to stay in their little hotel and do fuck all like all the families are closed off#but the chairmen are so eh about it like they look through you while the other two are actively like fuck you you aren’t one of us#someone mod the female chairmen back in the game#also I noticed the chair men have a noticeable and distinct roughness to their voices sans Benny and Tommy so I know headcanon they had#calls and chants for when scouting or in combat so most chairmen messed up their voice before joining house#but seriously these guys are like when Stan Lee is missing the fight behind him in spiderman like they are eating bitches and making bombs#right next door and what? you just need new talent? like I know Bennys doing wild shit but no one else knows#the others where scheming at major levels within the organizations Benny is the chairmen outlier they are so funny#fallout#fallout new vegas#fnv#benny gecko#the chairmen
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A Biltmore Christmas may be the first Hallmark movie to drive me to fanfic.
#hallmark#a biltmore christmas#time travel#WHERE IS MY POST-CREDITS SCENE SHOWING HOW MARGARET REACTS???#she was one of the best parts of the movie!#you need at least five minutes of her screaming for joy!#also clearly there was a conspiracy of people in the past who knew about the time travel thing so how did that work?#what about that bearded guy on the crew who was CLEARLY another time traveler?#(there is no way that facial hair came from 1947)#also where does the relationship go from there?#how do you adjust?#does tour guide riker help out?#so many unanswered questions can fit into the last scenes of that film and i need answers#also just overall: thanks to people who said this one was worth seeking out because my goodness what a delight#that movie oozed charm#i think maybe my true core fictional love is classic '30s/'40s film because i was digging that vibe#the banter! the patter! the zingers! the perfect blend of cynicism and sentimentality#some of the background stuff was too modern but also some was spot on#that guy who played claude looks like he was born to be a classic Hollywood film star#the leading lady did not fit the vibe at all but she had great chemistry with the movie's leads so i can see why they cast her#the old-timey writer dude was charming#the main lady might be a new favorite hallmark actress (there's only one other on the list)#(watched part of a different film with her in it and she seems to put some of that classic hollywood sass into her roles)#i wasn't sold on the male lead at first but the writing came through for him#when he sits in the chair behind her! when he's trying to guess her personality traits?#charming and absolutely spot-on for the vibe#(the fact that they cast hallmark regulars in the remake is hilarious and also sad because it looks so much worse than the original)#anyway great time had a blast will definitely be rewatching
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Damian wayne head cannon, bro is either over dressed or underdressed but always in style. The Wayne's tend to just pick a stugle some times as Dick, Jason ans steph and known for being in tight/short/ skimpy fits with loads of accessories and Bruce, Tim, babs, cas and Duke tend to do a...lot because why show up if it's not to show up? They are beautiful humans and they show off. Damian is from a place where everyone dressed over accessorised.
You can not convince me that the RAs don't walk around with gold/silver/broz/metal and gems apart of every fit.and everyone dose it too just they the main blood line is extra about it something about the wight helps training and you can't go around looking homeless if your a ra. So dami comes with his own gems why thank you and gets more 'anonymously'. It's also a good way to get in his good graces or earn is help or silence(this is abused by the family on 'don't tell xxxx').
So some days you see Damian in this 50 layer kimono because he favourite anime character of the week died or in botty shorts and a crop top (Both with mannny accessories) because he just felt like it.
Mind you he is still wearing heavy jewellery so people do try to rob him. But he is Damain, his rep is of a wild but beautiful dog. He dose bite he also has security detail thanks to his mother and grandfather that only do nothing if they themselves send assassin's to harm him.
He knows everyone knows. They are his old servants and nanny's he acts like it too. Alfred likes the extra help and plays card games with them. One of the mannor floors is dedicated to Damains 'guards'.
Witch leads me to another au.
The nanny's and servants help with house work alot so alf have more time with the family and the family gets to know them as well but they know the servants don't need to awnser to them and it's only because Damain likes them it happens. They are loyal af.
One time burce asked Damain why can't he act like kids his age at the time. The only kids outside of his siblings he knew was the rich brats at school.
This gose wrong fast.
As damaian has them disguise themselves in a mall area and plan for a meeting with one of his classmates who talked bad about his mother one day to come fight.
Damaian had an outing with a 'friend' that day conveniently.
So they met at the mall the kid had like 10 guards all buff and some with guns. Damaian smirked, and like a demon who won a prize, he started cackling.
Brat" why ate you laughing your surrounded "
Somebody was recording in the background BTW. There was even a crowd. When the guards surrounded him he grinned and clapped.
His guards sand up some dropping trays and lifting guns, others lifting knives. All looking at the small crowd of 11.
D: "No you are surrounded"
People in the crowd gasp as more jumps from. The 3rd floor to the 2nd floor some hand off wires with more guns by now even some coming out of the crowd with more weponds totalling to almost 300 men and women.
D"now what was it you said about my mother?being a broke, whore?"
He lifted his hands and grined eith a glint in his eyes.
"Everyone around you is an enemy shawn. You best kneel and beg before me for forgiveness before I have them wiped you off the map."
By this time the crowd was growing and it was on the news all asking who the armed people worked for.
Then they turned red in the center from Sniper aims and it becomes national news it's on NBC and BBC how some wayne kid plans to kill a classmate with 100 men and 40 snipers for being disrespectful to his mother talking about how Bruce is letting his kids use his money.
Then a chopper appears because damain is dramatic he came that way and his family *caough * Dick *caough * made it worst.
His grandfather walks out in all his glory, and it becomes known to the world as it is now world news it has the kids' parents showing up even. That Damian is a part of the Al Gulh royal family, and they came out of hiding because of the disrespect they faced in a school. The parent where bowing a grovelling to spare them. Then talia shows up in her crown princess clothes. It makes RA act even bolder because she often refuses to wear clothes he gives her. She apologized for the mess her son and father cause on international news.
The a chopper came over from the Korean royal family asking who disrespected their family.
Damnian becomes international overnight. His mother and grandfather now have Twitter, and so do the very much hidden in the plane sight empire. While the world want to know what land is, they refuse to talk about it.
And Bruce is pissed he scolds him and then some when he reaches home. Damaian said.
"You said 'why don't I act like other kids' I acted like my classmates are you happy now?"
Bruce sinks in defeat and noe has to make up a story as to hoe he and talia met and now has to fit royal meeting into Damains schedule as the korean[ he didn't know ] side of family also wants turns with him and his siblings if they wish to come. Ras is the same and nobody questions damians linage again.
And all racist comments stop in his presents, his slate wiped clean anyone who offended him where either expelled or conveniently disappeared. Gotham acts like it's an every day thing and now news reporters and other people try to dig into his life more than the other Wayne's forming sort of a protection for them because who cares I'd Jason and Tim had a gun fight in the middle of Gotham (paint gun) all of Gotham didn't care because they too also joined into to the mess.
Damain looks actually too tired to care now because too much is on his plate and he can't get work related injuries else take a leave of absence which last time made international news again, he played off the brused lip as he lost a tooth while reading a book and it fell on his face. Had to get check out infount of t.v to confirm it by at least two nations doctors. All 3 of them did and confirmed the sooth got shook out by something falling on his face. [It was jon. Jon fell on his face].
Damian also has to walk around with food testers and his school released his gardeds once to show off and his private touters [smartest people in the world] showed thier certificates from when he was a child of him being thr smartest kid they have ever thought.
It's not the end of it, Damain now basically sits and eats at galas because who has the standing to talk to him, both good and bad because everyone is watching him and he don't have to talk to them.
(I'm just building help:^
I need to stop alright one more
Sick as fuck rn )
Damains clothes become trendy and scrutinised. Because look at this, he is either over dressed or under dressed but never worse dressed and refuses to care about gender or cultural norms. Once, we wore a whole silk gown to a beach, like the after divorce, or just married a rich man type gown with the slit and everything with heavy jewellery, garter belt and that toe chain that ties up to your calves with a parasol.
(In my cannon, he looks more like talia than Bruce)
#damian al ghul#batman#alt au#dcu#headcanon#damian wayne#bat family#royal damian wayne#bruce asked him to be a normal kid and he only knows rich kids. utill he meets jon after burce thought about what he said#it wss like bruce said i know what i said was wrong i fix it by gibing you thr most normal kid i know *shows alien boy*#dick loves to plan damians outfits with bhim because why not#Jason uses damian to get more books#tim uses him to get more international assess#barbra sees this as a way to get better wheel chair#she also gets her spine fixs a bit so she can walk and shit but not for long so still needs the wheel chair.#duek gets aloooot of comics and games#cass loves to use it to get food and just show up places and nobody bats an eye like that one time she showed up behind a victora secret#show and besically they just dressed her in what ever becauee she is rich enough and shit idk how those work#she is now a model on the side.#steph loves to go all over the world and eat there and do social media shit. but she also made shore her child got better treatment#even without her interference in her life she doesn't feel ready for that yet but she still wants it to live a life she could only wish for#even if she is not there#alf loves his new friends working in the mannor and have sceduled game and movie nights.#he also takes breaks now some times.
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Brothers
based on the fic
#can you guys see the symbolism#I will tell you in the tags here#the BG is their hotel#symmetrical and symbolic of their thriving crime ring#the brothers themselves are asymmetrical#symbolic of their tense relationship#Malik is looking off into an empty space#looking at someone who should be standing beside him#but someone who is not…#Amir is glaring cautiously at his brother#perhaps wondering why he’s standing why his jacket is off#is malik going somewhere???#his cigarette is almost out while Amir’s is fresh and has plenty more time to burn#Amir is seated in a throne like chair for in a way he’s king of domino#this chair is shielding him from the brilliant light of the chandelier yet because Malik is standing most of the light reaches him from#behind#UM YEAH….#SO….#I care about them#I will finish this fic I have one more chapter to do….#their relationship makes me emotional man#ygo#malik ishtar#yami marik#The Clean Sneak#ygo au#1920s au#millenniumringg art
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my ideal post fall dynamic is Will as the classic grumbly whiskey and beer drinking American husband and Hannibal as the ever doting housewife and no i do not accept criticism
#Will comes home from work even vaguely tired#and Hannibal is already moving him to the Big Chair in the living room#sliding his boots and socks off. giving him a foot rub and asking about his day#he does this rather frequently actually. rubs away Will's aches and pains anywhere he can#bonus if Will doesn't even take it as a sign of being 'together' he's just like. yeah that's him#then one day Will pieces the little bits of domestic care together#comes up behind as Hannibal's cooking and wraps his arms around his waist#rests his chin on Hannibal's shoulder#and Will can HEAR his breath hitch. it's a tiny thing but it's there#and THAT is how they fuck for the first time
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Does anyone else feel like the incinerator gun chair room from Zero Time Dilemma would have better fit C Team instead of D Team
#elaboration in the tags#zero time dilemma#zero escape#ztd#I think of this every time I watch a playthrough and get to that room#carlos ztd#akane kurashiki#junpei tenmyouji#c team#like just about any combination fits with the potential character growth both Akane and Junpei would have from it#I understand the main character is Carlos so if we were to keep it as him making the decision then I would have Akane in the incinerator#and Junpei in the chair#but if we’re going to throw ‘main character chooses’ then you could truly have either Akane or Junpei at the gun with Carlos in the chair#I say all this cuz there’s the obvious Akane incinerator parallels and I imagine it could trigger a breakdown for her#if Junpei is behind the gun would she beg Junpei to shoot Carlos to save her?#would Junpei see that Akane sees other players as pawns to save her own life? and if she doesn’t beg does it help Junpei#see the humanity in her? where he previously thought she was uncaring but here she clearly is to save Carlos at the cost of her own life#but my fave configuration is Junpei in the incinerator and Akane at the gun#it helps them see from each other’s point of view. how scared would Junpei be being in the incinerator and there’s nothing he can do#but rely on someone else? Junpei in characterized as pretty selfish in ZTD so this experience could have him empathize with Akane’s#‘selfishness’ in the previous games. realizing you’d do it too if your life was on the line#and Akane can see just how difficult it is being the one to directly have a hand in how people die or at least see their bodies.#and is it worth it to just save one person?#yes Akane’s games have a way for everyone to survive and win at the end. but in the moment the players don’t know that.#I think that configuration would do SO much for akane and Junpei to better empathize with one another during ZTD#this could’ve been a whole post but I wasn’t confident enough in my coherence to properly format it. so tags you get
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Dark Shadows episode 85, aired October 21 1966
#screencaps that make me froth at the mouth a little. tbh.#IT'S A GOOD SHOW. HAROLD.#it's an episode about grief! about regrets! the temporarily curative powers of enough cheap whiskey to drown a clydesdale! & -#above all! the stranglehold of the past and the power of it to hold us all prisoners. <3#liz looming behind carolyn like the portrait of isaac [benjamin?] is looming behind her;#in the next scene: burke looming behind sam: not a linear descent; like the collinses; but a clear threat of sam's guilty conscience.#the old paintings of long-sunk ships and empty chairs at the bar. the empty chair at the table that sam and burke gesture to as bill's -#or bill's ghost's.#the shadow behind sam like a third party after he and burke start reminiscing about bill & drunkenly singing 'Drunken Sailor'.#liz in her light housedress disappearing behind the dark front doors. carolyn's light raincoat over her dark party dress.#carolyn in front of the buoy; burke holding the glass up and literally blocking her from view.#liz looking away from the outside and vicki shaking the bars on her window.#vicki and the weird light at the beginning of the episode; vicki staring down bill's ghost at the end of it.#dark shadows#episode 85 my good friend episode 85 have you seen her? now you have.
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twelveclara is so insane why did they do all that
#the thing is that tenrose is like a foundational ship but they’re both so young like it’s a young person’s dynamic#and then twelveclara sneaks up behind you with a steel chair like hey we’re 100% more insane about everything wanna tango#and then BAM you black out#i only got four hours of sleep nothing i post today is my fault#toxic universeendangering codependency slay
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“Good movies are always better when you watch them with someone.” - Ed Chigliak (Northern Exposure)
#if there's anything to know about ed it's that his love of films and filmmaking is a MAJOR defining aspect of his personality#you may claim to love movies but i doubt you love movies as much as ed does#and i've said it once and i'll say it again: he would kill it on letterboxd#the movies mentioned in the pic in order are:#good morning vietnam#the seventh seal#alice doesn't live here anymore#indiana jones: raiders of the lost ark#the lion of winter#ordinary people#who's afraid of virginia woolf?#taxi driver#ed chigliak#my art#and yes. yes i did draw all those vhs tape spines#i specifically looked for movies that were 1) mentioned in the show by ed or implied that ed owns#2) had a version released in the up to the early 90s (so it's conceivable he had that in his collection)#and 3) had text or images that would be visible behind his body and chair#artists on tumblr#northern exposure
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i bet you there would have been a hot ones episode of american auto s3
#ana would have riffed so hard#sadie panicking behind the cameraman motioning to cut#wesley pulling up a chair and shoving a wing in his mouth already mid sentence#cyrus wanting to eat a spicy wing so bad but trying to help katherine choose the mildest sauce#elliot immediately breaking into an allergic rash just being in the room with everything#dori mumbling to herself about she makes a hotter sauce than whatever they have#katherine eating one wing and starting to giggle because the heat is creeping up on her#taking off her blazer fanning herself already asking for milk
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My current favourite crackship that I just created myself is Hiyori×Alive!Kuina. Just because if she can't get Zoro she'll just go for his cousin instead.
You're a genius. Your brain is huge. Please, let me kiss your brain. This is just amazing. I love lesbians. You're SO real-
Hiyori is easily one of my favorite characters and I love her SO much and people won't stop reducing her to her ship with Zoro. I think she doesn't need anybody and if she did want somebody it should be a girl. Because I say so. And Kuina is just,,, She would've been such a great character. Can't stop thinking about this fanart I found because it has changed my life for the better. She's in Wano to train to become the world's greatest swordsman and I'm just thinking about what if Kuina had been there to help them out too and she had been the one to save Hiyori all those times instead of Zoro.... Thinking thoughts. Like, of course, Hiyori and Zoro also have their moments because I do actually like their dynamic and I think she admires him a lot!! But you know. Kuina saves Hiyori a couple of times (when Zoro was going to do it, actually, she just appears like a second before him and ruins his moment) and Hiyori just melts. Because who wouldn't? Kuina would be so tall and strong and a sizeable woman, and I would personally die if she helped me save my country. Besides, I think they'd understand each other because both are women that have been reduced to that role specifically instead of their ambitions and their power and they're so much more. Hiyori was helpless when she had to see her country turn into this mess and she couldn't so anything else but to pretend,, Like-- If somebody knows how being a woman in the world works is Hiyori, and Kuina would understand. She'd admire Kuina so much for her abilities and her personality and ambitions!!!!!! And Kuina would absolutely love Hiyori's kindness and strength for being able to put up with so much!!!
Not to mention that Kuina would be taller than her,,, And bigger,,, And Hiyori would have to look up,, And this is now just the aesthetic part but God they'd look so different. That's Hiyori's guard dog. Wouldn't it be funny if Kuina were all serious and teasing with Zoro and like "*raises eyebrow* seriously?" type of masc girl, and the second Hiyori is around she turns into the happiest person in the world and extremely protective of her? Zoro judges her but he can't say shit because he's literally the same with Luffy (and Kuina teases him even more because she always has the upper hand and it makes him so angry). They're both down bad. Hiyori is just so nice to her and keeps saying she trusts her to become the world's greatest swordsman but even if she doesn't, she'll always have her heart and a place to stay in Wano. And I am weak, guys, I am so weak for lesbians.
Aghhh this is SO good. Somebody make them kiss. I- This is great. Oda could just say "ah yes Kuina actually escaped her hometown on her own and faked her death and traveled to Wano" and I'd believe him wholeheartedly because I want her back. I also want Hiyori back. I miss Wano sometimes a lot.
Also, Kuina sees Zoro with Enma and she goes:
Kuina: Oh cool, you got Hiyori's sword. Good luck with that one. Zoro: Do you want it or what? I am not giving it to you. You'll have to fight for it. Kuina: Nah, when I win our fight I want to win against the king of hell. Nothing less. Zoro: Where's the 'I can't win I'm a girl' bullshit now? Kuina: Stayed with the girl. Now I am a woman and I am going to beat your ass.
And Hiyori looking at them having the biggest lesbian moment in the world kicking her feet and blushing and Momo is next to her like "hehe you have a crush-" and he doesn't get to finish what he was saying because Hiyori hits him so fucking hard he faints. Don't tease her. Poor girl. She's in love, leave her alone.
#please i know i am the first one to explain the meaning behind kuina's death but the way op treats women is just not it and i want her again#also hiyori is the love of my life she's precious to me idc she's my princess i am in love with her#i thought this post would be only about a silly crackship but they're actually consuming my brain oh my god#and when kuina has to go away from wano because she has to go achieve her dream and she goes 'i don't expect you to wait for me but-'#and hiyori just holds her hands and says 'my mother waited. i've waited. and i will keep doing it as long as you come back to me'#or something like that. and i want to cry-#i am vibrating in my fucking chair god please i love them now i need more of them so fucking bad#one piece#kozuki hiyori#shimotsuki kuina#hiyoku??? kuiyori???#i have no idea what to call this ship tumblr do your thing somebody should choose the name for me i suck at this thing#roronoa zoro#zolu#bc zolu mention there and in my head it's a very common topic between kuina and zoro okay she won't stop teasing him about it#+
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tagged by ko @tofumilanesa for wip wednesday! big shout out to writevember for making me feel like i can actually call any of these works in progress… your guide to my emoji code under the cut
wip!
🪻🐈⬛ - the doc title is still just. YOWLING but i am like 7/8 of the way done with omega yamo fic and hopefully salem isn’t reading this so i can just drop it over a year later with no warning <3
🫃2️⃣ - DEWEY^2 P2!!!! she is almost done (i am lying) but she is so close i can almost taste it. sorry to my pwp that grew its own feelings baby
😇🤭 (🕒 -> 🕜) - rip i’m not telling you about this one until it’s posted but it IS complete aside from being ao3 formatted and the eight billion edits i inevitably do right before full-sending it
☁️💧 - cloud petey fic, which exists mostly as an embarrassingly large tag on a different blog and is condensing into a narrative about as well as water at 30° N/S. the time loop fic also falls under this description
eternally in progress (short list)
🌑🐕 - tyler borzoituzzi exists… there is an index of scenes/plot points… it plays like a movie in my head…
💯❕- fantastic! ‘verse
👁️👻 - stevie brandon seeing ghosts au, which has eight different (now nine i guess but you haven't seen the mustache adam post yet) plots. sorry
just. rotating like a microwave
🍎 - because they didn’t have a pomegranate emoji, this is what i used for the fic that feels like it should be a 50k connor bedard character study hanif abdurraqib/cathal kelly thesis about legends and mythmaking in sports and eating your young. yes i know pomegranates aren’t actually pomes and apples are but it’s fine
🦈 - the one cat da fuck they doing over there meme but about the sharks just like. in general. more on this at five
tagging @colap1nto, @songsandswords, @whitenikes, @gordiemeow, @acheronist, and anybody else who wants to share!!
#i regret to inform the public (beloved mutuals who read my tags) that we have hit the doldrums re: creativity.#got SO excited because i had no prep for tomorrow and got out unreasonably early and proceeded to do nothing 🤩 zero motivation/inspiration#anyway. being a big baby. have looked at dewey^2 for too long and now hate it which makes me sad because i was on SUCH a roll solving plot#and really i just need to pick something else from my (looks at smudged hand) 10000 other documents but none of them are calling my nameeee#maybe i’ll ao3 format 🕒 -> 🕜 or maybe i’ll read wandering stars (did finish a book this morning) and then hope something strikes me#preferably very aggressively like with the force of a train? OHHHHHH YOU GUYS MAYBE I COULD MAKE SOMETHING FOR HOLY JUMPING MACKEREL FEST#because you know what DID hit me upside the head like a 2x world champ coming from behind with the steel chair WAS BERGY & JOE GUESS WHO#joey first of all did not deserve to lose those games and second of all i am SO immensely delighted i don’t know if it’s on here yet i am#so sure at least one of my beloved drw moots (beth and nik are likely culprits but all of u would) has it on here yet BUT THERE’S SO MUCH#BERGY VERY BLATANTLY CALLING JOE A NERD BC HE KNOWS ALL ABT HIS TEAMMATES &LOVES THEM!! BERGY NOT KNOWING A SINGLE FUCKIN THING ABT ANYONE!#the absolute unsurprised yet still heartbroken disbelief & disappointment of joe saying ‘he uses black tape!’ oh that’s rent-free forever#anyway.#liv in the replies#p.s. it's fic friday now don't worry about how late i am#as always ask away ask about anything in post tags y'all know i love to yap u are always welcome in the inbox or dms#i was trying to be slightly less mysterious about all of these but i am a secret-keeper sorry and also you need to live inside my brain#in order to understand half of what i'm referencing sometimes. sorry.#also there are some un-hockey fic projects i want to do but i have. so little time in my life for anything sometimes that we will make do
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sometimes i'm like. am i actually a narcissist? just for a moment. then i remember that from the ages of like 12-19 i eschewed all other photographs or more normal forms of decoration to keep a framed photo of myself on either my desk or my bedside table where i could look at it constantly. cuz i thought i looked cute and confident and no it did not occur to me i might like to have a photo of like, a family member or some cool trees or something i just took like 7 years to go huh wait other people don't keep a photograph of themselves on their desks? what do you do when you want to look at yourself go all the way to a mirror??? anyway it wasn't realizing this was unusual that made me stop the photo just got water damage
#rip it genuinely made me so happy bc it was like 10-y-oldish me lounging upside down in a chair#with my hands behind my head just smiling the hugest most smug smile#everything Went Wrong when i was 8 or 9 so maybe i was younger when it was taken? or i was just on an upswing/good day#but tinyme exuded so much confidence in that photo it acted like a coping mechanism trigger object#id look at it and just go 'hell YEAH we're crushing it'. (reader i was not crushing it ever)#anyway just thought of this bc i was thinking abt the shit therapist i saw once b4 i got a better one recently#where i shared i 'found it useful to use npd as a framework to help me manage' i.e 'i self-dxed and i'm right but i'm gonna act#like i could be wrong. also all dxes are bullshit to some degree'#and then like. 5 min later i was explaining some of the things i've already worked on and what i wanted to#and my general mental profile blah blah. and she was like 'um... wow you think a lot about yourself!' and i literally just.#looked at her and then pointed to myself and said 'i mean#narcissism...'#anyway she got fired or smth and the guy i have now is chill. this can count as a life update ig#sunflower radio hour#vic talks#my arms are killing me i should not have typed........... Hubris.
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