#((I feel like that one meme of a conspiracy theorist in a room with a red string connecting papers))

[tenuuchlegch]

Shadowbringers HC’s

Alriiiight! This is the moment you have all been waiting for! The one. The only, obligatory Shadowbringers headcanon dump post! Now since there is frankly a LOT to go over in this expansion, this will be divided into a couple of parts. With that being said let’s get started.

When the Exarch finally managed to establish a connection with Odtsetseg and bring her to the First, she was at the time carrying an egg in her bag. This was something that she managed to find, when helping some hunters locate their rathalos quarry in the Azim Steppes. This egg miraculously made it through the journey across the rift unharmed and then later a rathalos hatched from it in the middle of the Crystarium upon her arrival. Since au ra was the first being he saw the little, burning wyvern imprinted on her. Thus did she name her newfound friend Luu, which is ancient, auri tongue for dragon. 

While not entirely trusting the Exarch in the Stormblood patches, with him accidentally bringing the Scions over instead of her, Odtsetseg felt she had very little choice but to heed his call. Even if xaela outright refused, she felt he would still have leverage over her by essentially keeping her found family trapped in another realm. Thus did she go not for her own sake, but so her family might be saved.

Needless to say, that perspective began shifting a bit the moment she entered the First. When arriving she was deeply disturbed that the comforting night sky and glowing moon were practically nonexistent. Being a xaela who grew in the steppes, both day and especially night were practically considered sacred so seeing it all just overwhelmed in a sanitizing light was unsettling for her. This feeling was taken further when Lyna took down the minor sin eater and Odtsetseg quickly realized what had happened to the man she first met upon her leave.

Then there came the Crystarium. Upon seeing it’s jutting spire, Odtsetseg immediately recognized it to be the Crystal tower from Mor Dhona, or in the very least, it looked almost exactly like it. With that in mind, the au ra had a sneaking suspicion that this Exarch character was connected to G’raha Tia in some way. He had to be, for who else could utilize the tower’s power so thoroughly? She did not wish to potentially poke the sleeping bull by asking too many queries however, so the dancer remained silent on the matter for a time. 

When meeting Feo Ul and forming a pact with her, there was a part of Odtsetseg that wondered whether or not this would come back to haunt her later. She had never met any pixies before, up until that point so she felt skeptical about making a so-called pact without knowing her a bit more first. Regardless she DID want her stuff back and for someone at home to know her current status so reluctantly, au ra obliged. 

Learning about Minfilia’s fate in the First did comfort au ra, a bit. Though she did not have much of a connection to her compared towards the other Scions, she still was the first to welcome Odtsetseg into their group. Without hesitation, she invited her to become a part of their family and although xaela responded by emotionlessly thinking it would be a blood pact at the time, they DID become her found kin eventually and the dancer would never forget such kindness. 

Meeting Ardbert was definitely unexpected even moreso by the fact that she thought him to be essentially dead by then. Still, meeting him, somewhat experiencing the situation of his world for herself and learning about its condition when being introduced to the Crystarium she could not deny that his realm was indeed underneath dire strains. That being said, she did not bring him up to the Exarch. It was apparent that only she could espy him, from the way her baby rathalos looked confused when they talked and him claiming such facts, so mentioning the fallen warrior might make her seem insane in other’s eyes. Honestly though after that encounter, there was a part of her which contemplated whether or not she was losing it.

Rather than burden the Exarch with raising her new rathalos companion immediately, she decided to take him along when reconvene with the twins. He was still young, after all and Odtsetseg did feel a tad guilty for bringing unfamiliar life into an apocalyptic world. The least she could do was make certain it was taken care of. Plus keeping an eye on him did well for her mental state, throughout the journey. That being said, the Exarch and twins did babysit him when they entered Rak’tika.

Now for Alphinaud and Kholusia. From the beginning Odtsetseg could tell that something was amiss in the atmosphere. The barren lands, the people quitting honest work to enter this “paradise” of a city, the old not having a chance of peace it all felt so wrong somehow. The exploits with elezen boy followed by meeting the discarded painter proved that this place was more of a dystopia than a blessed heaven. 

Odtsetseg TOTALLY brought up Estinien, when they finally entered the city. How could she not? What was even funnier to her was the fact that Alphinaud acted like she and him remained in touch. [This can be either true or false depending on how one makes their Estinien interact with her.]

While Odtsetseg could not claim to be immediately fond of the Chais, she supposed Dulia-Chai at least was kinder than au ra expected. 

When meeting Vauthry, Odtsetseg was immediately disgusted. He reminded her of a Doman legend her mother used to tell when she was young. One about a cruel tyrant of Doma who was so greedy and heavyset that when he died his body burned for days because of his greasy fat. This Vauthry was the culmination of hubris, greed and selfishness so full glad was she to quit that area. 

Now for Amh Araeng. She was relieved to know that not all societies save the Crystarim’s were like that of Eulmore. When she did the cracking of the coin purse and given so much skewered frogs, Odtsetseg was tempted to take it as a challenge and eat all of them, but she decided saving much for her hungry rathalos hatchling would be best. The nice thing about having a baby carnivore around was that it ensured no meat would be wasted. 

The revelation that some eaters infected other people and made them their own, reminded Odtsetseg of those tempered by Ifrit and how there was nothing to do but simply kill them. Here however it was an eerily slow process and Odtsetseg would be lying if she claimed witnessing such events unfold firsthand did not raise some concerns for her. Then there came Tesleen.

While she did not know the woman as much compared to Alisaie, au ra could not deny her genuine kindness which made her tormented transformation into an eater all the more horrifying to watch. That being said, she knew the elezen girl likely took it harder than her, so when they went home dancer allowed red mage to pet Luu for comfort.  

When learning of the Lightwardens and being told that Hydaelyn’s blessing was capable of protecting her from their infectious light, Odtsetseg did not even think twice about questioning it. Despite not being able to communicate with her personally for so long, her powers still assisted former bard when it counted so she had little reason to doubt it at first. 

Once they went through Holminster Switch and Odtsetseg opened a path towards the night sky, au ra’s doubts about being here dispelled with the fading light. Thus when the Exarch approached her humbly and expressed his gratitude, Odtsetseg decided then and there to fully commit herself towards this cause. 

The whole reincarnation of Minfilia struck Odtsetseg as surprising for it made the kind girl she once knew almost similar to that of an ascian. To her it seemed out of character for the benevolent woman she once knew to resort towards their enemies’ ways. Yet when meeting the new Minfilia for the first time, she could not deny that they looked exactly alike in terms of physical appearances. Despite this she never once treated the girl as anyone other than her own person. Since she did not know the Source’s Minfilia as well as some other Scions did, it was easier for Odtsetseg to accept that this young lady wasn’t her. The Minfilia she knew perished in the bloody banquet; whisked away into some unknown realm because of divine intervention. 

Full glad as Odtsetseg was in seeing Thancred again, she did find his reprimanding of the blond girl to be somewhat jarring. Mainly because from what little she knew, this girl had lived a very sheltered existence until his intervention and she was still young. So witnessing the depravity of this world might effect her more than others. Despite her initial thoughts, she kept them to herself as they searched for Urianger. 

Luu definitely tried nipping at various fae folk a couple of times. Il Mheg was also the place where he learned how to fly. Though at the time he still wasn’t big enough to ride on. He also learned how to hunt a bit as well, while there. 

While she was still unsure if what Urianger saw in the rift was even real, his explanation or at least theory on how the ascians made the calamities was most enlightening. 

Due to his aetheric alterations in being exposed to the rift, Luu can breathe underwater just as Odtsetseg can. Thus when the Fuath attempted to drown his rider, the young rathalos was quickly found by the Scions unscathed.  Speaking of that though when Ardbert described the people of Voeburt and Odtsetseg thought back to the Fortemps she became even more determined to save the First. Even if Urianger’s vision was not false, she could not bring herself to risk failing the family again. 

Once Ryne expressed her woes involving Thancred to au ra, she began wondering if the man really saw this girl as her own, separate person, rather than his late friend. Granted she knew more than most that her loss effected him at a deeper level than others, but still he should not discount the fact that this new Minfilia was not the one he knew. 

Feo Ul taking her place as the new Fairy King, instantly gained Odtsetseg’s respect, because unlike some she had no desire to live for eternity. Her only regret was not seeing the Eulmoreans get their butts kicked by the fae, for herself. 

Enter the one, the only bastard man of the hour Emet Selch. Yeah, she did NOT enjoy encountering him at all. Not only did she distrust him because he was ascian, but au ra also felt that he was personally insulting the entirety of her mother’s side of the family by still being around. You see, her mother was once part of a royal Doman line which adamantly opposed Garlean occupation. As a result, all of them were sentenced to death when they took over, while her mother was in the Azim Steppes. So to say there was already bad blood between them, would have been an understatement. 

Luu shared his rider’s dislike for the ascian, as he was not hesitant to growl or snap at him.

She found it unsettling that the Unsundered ascian would continue his insistence on them cooperating with one another. Not only that, but the way he looked at her... stirred something within the au ra, though she simply shelved it as suspicion at the time. 

Surprised as she was when discovering that Emet pursued them to Rak’tika, it briefly turned into amusement when Thancred did not hesitate to sass him.  The moment Y’shtola failed to recognize her own aether, Odtsetseg KNEW something was up. Her suspicions were confirmed, when she overheard the miqo’te confronting Urianger. This of course made the au ra worried, not for herself but for this world and everyone around her. If she failed, there was a high chance all would fall, so her mind began working on making a contingency plan. 

While a part of her was definitely disinclined to seek an ascian’s help when plucking Y’shtola from the lifestream, she could not deny the lack of other options. That being said she didn’t want to be caught unawares should he suddenly betray them, nor did she wish for her friend to appear... bare before the others. As a result, Odtsetseg brought a blanket and sharpened weapons to their meeting point. Luckily, Emet Selch was courteous enough to return the sorceress’s garments. 

She totally shipped Runar and Y’shtola, don’t @ me. 

The secrets revealed in Qitana Ravel, definitely shocked Odtsetseg. Not only did it almost challenge her belief in Nhaama and Azim, but it also made her question Hydaelyn herself and the origins of her Echo abilities. Was she REALLY blessed? Or was this a form of being tempered? And her world being the shattered remnants of an ascian home? It sounded all insane to her at first, though eventually she came to realize there may have been a bit of logic to it.

[cornedbread]

Principal got the Homestuck treatment.

[delawaredetroit]

So, several things. This line makes me think that Shouto was originally supposed to have a larger role in the story. Since this line seems to foreshadow that Shouto would have been more involved in the OFA-AFO plotline in a way that just didn't end up happening.

The manga does a better job of subtly showing why Shigaraki isn't running amok at this point in the story. He's still covered in bandages after Snipe shot him full of holes at the USJ. Also, it's blurry but it looks like Shigaraki has some kind of conspiracy corkboard in his room. Despite the conspiracy theorist board memes that seem to be a dime a dozen in this fandom, I've never seen one with Shigaraki despite it potentially being true to canon for him.

It's also notable to me that in the manga, Inko tends to show up in panels near AFO/Shigaraki. Here, the panels with Shigaraki and Inko even mirror each other. Both are alone in a room overcrowded with stuff watching a screen. Both are surrounded by trash (though it's a gag in Inko's panel). And both are having anxious responses to what they are looking at on screen (Shigaraki's scratching vs Inko's excessive crying).

I don't know if this is dfo foreshadowing, a nod to a parallel between AFO and Izuku's characters through their closest "family members", or some kind of red herring. But this mirroring feels intentional and is there for a reason

[kitthepurplepotato]

Shenanigans Part 10

Part 10/ Bakugou Katsuki and the case of the fortune teller

Warnings: Swear words. That’s it.

Summary: Best Jeanist wants to go to a fortune teller. Bakugou hates the idea.

New to the story? Click here for the first part!

Check out the Master List for more content!

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Mr. Katsuki wakes up in a hospital.

It’s loud and cold and it smells like shit.

Mr. Katsuki wants to go back to sleep.

“Katsuki!” Kirishima’s loud and annoying voice comes through the haze in his brain, giving him a new kind of headache. “Are you okay?!”

“I was okay until you started yapping.” The blonde mumbles, definitely not ready for this shit yet.

First of all, he was absolutely manhandled by the Menace.

Second of all, he kinda liked being manhandled by the Menace.

He’s not sure which statement is worse. He really hopes these are only the side effects of his concussion, even though he wasn’t concussed when he first thought about them. Fuck.

“Thank god.” Shitty Hair sighs and looks at him with the look Katsuki hates the most; the look of pity. “Don’t fret too much, she was unfair. I can’t believe she…” Kirishima couldn’t finish the sentence as Bakugou’s palm crackled under the covers, leaving an unpleasant burning smell behind.

“What the fuck, Shitty hair!” The blonde screams. “She won fair and square. She distracted me and it worked. Yes, I fucking hate to lose but I know defeat when I see one.”

Even Katsuki can’t believe he just said these words. Maybe he does need to sleep a bit longer. A few hours maybe. Or a few weeks. Or he will just hibernate until the menace dies of old age so he never has to face his stupid shitty feelings.

“I’m really not sure if I should be proud of you for saying this or be concerned that you might have been brain washed by Y/N.”

“That’s it!” Comes the excited voice of Dynamight, his eyes sparkling with joy like he’s not in a hospital room after being beaten up by a girl half his size. “She brainwashed me! That’s why I feel all these weird things, like my heart can’t stop beating when I think of her stupid, flushed face looking down at me…”

“Well thank fuck it doesn’t, you would be dead, bruh.” Comments the redhead but his response remains unheard.

“And the way I don’t even feel bad for losing because she earned my respect! Yeah, fuck that, I was just brain washed!”

Kirishima’s best friend looks absolutely insane right now; his hair is tousled from the hospital pillow, his face is pale and there are massive bags under his eyes and a few bruises around his chin. He looks like the conspiracy theorist from that old meme. It’s hilarious and disturbing at the same time.

“… just… sleep a bit more, will ya? I think you are still not completely yourself.” Kirishima mumbles and leaves the room quicker than he does a burning building.

What the fuck did he just listen to?!

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

You really considered resigning at this point.

You made all the possible mistakes; you kicked your boss in the balls, you flirted with him in front of the whole office and made it absolutely obvious that you secretly have the hots for him and you also talked back to your other boss who only wanted to reprimand you for being an absolute ass.

You brought in a small box to put your stuff in, just in case you get fired today because fuck, you definitely will be.

Hm. You might as well start packing.

You start to put your knick knacks into your small little box one by one. You are so zoned out you don’t even realize when the door opens up with a loud bang.

“What the fuck are you doing, shithead?!” You can’t help but look up at the voice; you were absolutely sure you’ll never hear it again after what you’ve done.

“Mr. Dynamight, I’m…”

What the fuck are you supposed to say now?!

Hey, no need to fire me I’m on my way out anyway. Oh, also, here’s my number, call me, maybe? No? No worries, love you, bye.

“I don’t fucking care anyway, just stop it and get your jacket, we are going out with the stringy hoe.” The blonde says nonchalantly, like the last 2 days didn’t happen at all. Okay, now you are even more confused.

“Uhm, yes, I’m coming, yeah, no worries, really, I wasn’t about to resign anyway. Absolutely not.” You mumble with a red face and grab your jacket without asking more questions; if this is his way to lure you out of the building and kill you, so be it. It’s still better than being alone with him in the office.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Best Jeanist is a really weird person. He loves people and he cares about them, but at the same time; thanks to all the shit he has been through; he doesn’t really know what’s appropriate and what’s not. Shortly; he can’t read the room. At all. Like Shouto fucking bacon face Todoroki times 10. Hence why, a day after Mr. Katsuki gets his ass handed to him, his sexual frustration clear and obvious to everyone after the the shit they’ve pulled in the training room, Best Jeanist decides this is the right time to ask Katsuki, Kirishima and Menace out to a….

“…Trip to that famous fortune teller!” Best Jeanist finishes his sentence. There was probably something before that last part, but fuck if Katsuki knows, he was too busy thinking about… well… everything.

“The fuck?” Katsuki and the Menace barks into the awkward silence in unison.

So apparently there is this famous fortune teller in Japan who is able to tell your future with his quirk. Not the whole thing, but bits and pieces. Katsuki doesn’t really understand why is this such a big thing; he really doesn’t care about shit like that and he certainly doesn’t care about his sore knee at the age of 53 or about his 50 cats when he’s 70.

By the look on the Menace’s face, she’s going through the same thought process; they look at each other questioningly for a second before deciding to look away with a slight blush on their faces, like two fucking teenagers. They really need to get their shit together. They fought, Y/N won. End of the story. Nothing has changed, they still hate each other. They just had a moment in the middle of the battle. No biggie.

“Yeah, Mr. Jeanist, we can come with you!” Kirishima - as always - saves the day. Best Jeanist has a mischievous smirk on his face; Bakugou is not sure what makes the other blonde so excited about this, but at least he won’t be forced to talk to the menace today.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

People think Best Jeanist has nothing in his head but strings and clothing designs, but the truth is; he is a sucker for a good romance story.

Hence why he came up with the perfect plan to get his two favorite students together as soon as possible.

“So what’s the plan?” He asks Masato, the famous fortune teller, his hand holding out a thick envelope. The guy reaches out to take the envelope then looks inside; there is enough money to feed his 3 kids for at least a year. He has mouths to feed, so self-respect be damned.

“I’ll tell those two they are meant to be.” Mr. Masato smirks.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

This needs to be a scam.

The whole place just screams “fake”; the dark purple walls, the over-decorated tables, the massive amount of stones and crystals available for purchase at the counter, the crystal ball in front of the guy who looks like he’s cosplaying a magician from an MMO game; it’s so over the top it’s actually disgusting.

“Let’s get over with this, I have paperwork to finish.” The blonde mumbles, absolutely uninterested in this whole shenanigan.

Kirishima looks like a kid in a candy store; he’s all over the place, looking at every single crystal and right now he’s bothering the poor sales person with random questions about them. To be fair, he is absolutely adorable from afar, leaping around the room with an excited spark in his eyes. Kirishima is a precious little fuck.

“Kiri is so sweet, isn’t he? You just want to put him in your back pocket and keep him there to cuddle him when you’re lonely.”

Well, you didn’t want to say this out loud, but oh well. It’s out there now.

Apparently, this wasn’t the right thing to say as Dynamight’s palms sparked up and his eyes went even more red than usual.

“Oh yeah? Go and fuck him then, he’s single.” The blonde pouts angrily, stomping towards the confused fortune teller guy to sit down. Kirishima stares at you with a red face, like this is the first time someone complimented him in his sad life.

“Aww, you are so sweet when you pout, Mr.Katsuki!” You put your hands on your chest to dramatize your words. “I do have two back pockets, you can both take one, if you want!”

“I don’t share.” The blonde responds with a straight face and now it’s your time to blush like a teenager; did he just… flirt back?!

… or he might have the hots for Kirishima and he doesn’t want to share them.

What? It’s an option.

“I’m really confused by the relationship of you three.” The long forgotten Best Jeanist speaks up and sits down next to Katsuki.

“Well, you are at the right place to get answers for your questions!” The fortune teller guy speaks up and if you weren’t sure about this being a scam, now you are. He sounds like those guys in the TV advertisements, which is definitely a good thing when you work in the industry but it’s a little bit too much when you are only a fortune teller in a shitty tent.

“Let’s start with the blonde young man with the threatening aura!” The guy perks up, locking his eyes with Dynamight without an explanation. His eyes go blank and there are tiny pictures scrolling though his eyeballs, too small for a normal person to actually see. You cheekily start up your magnifying quirk to get a closer look at the pictures; there is one with you in it, kneeling in front of the crying Dynamight, cupping his cheek with teary eyes.

Okay, what the fuck?! That’s way to out of character for you two to actually happen.

There is another picture that makes you smile; Katsuki in his cute little glasses taking your hand in the middle of the city while rain pours all over you. He looks like the Katsuki from the other dimension, so he will probably find you in their own world, just how he promised.

Ahh, you miss that fucker so-so much. You really hope your other self will appreciate the boy the way you would appreciate him.

“No snooping, this is not your future! Well… technically.” The guy winks at you as he comes back to reality. “Mr. Bakugou Katsuki. You are a lucky little sod.” The guy smiles at the blonde. “I don’t want to go into too much details in case it changes the future, but… “ He sighs dramatically. “I can see you are a really strong and passionate person, kind of aggressive, hard to be around for a long amount of time.”

“No shit, Sherlock, everyone who owns a TV knows that.” The blonde scoffs, clearly unimpressed.

“That’s true. But would I know how much you seek comprehension and how much you secretly wonder if there will ever be a person romantically loving you for who you are?”

Well, one thing for sure, you are not going to question the guy’s abilities when it’s your turn, he clearly knows how to fight back.

“This is a fucking scam, I don’t think about any of those things! I’m absolutely fine by myself!” The blonde grumbles with his face all red, avoiding eye contact.

“Well, if you enjoy solitude, I have bad news for you; you won’t be alone for long.” The guy smiles and looks right at you as he winks again. You really want to tell him off for his bullshit, but you saw the pictures. If this is actually a scam then it’s a really good one at that, and you can’t help but respect his shenanigans.

For your surprise, Dynamight doesn’t scream at the guy again, instead he asks a question.

“So who’s the fucker who ruins my perfect life?” Katsuki almost whispers to the guy, who can’t help but smile at that.

“The one you’ve been constantly thinking about for the last two days.”

Katsuki grunts in response but doesn’t say anything else. The guy moves to the next person without a word while you wonder about the meaning of his reading; yes, you saw yourself in the pictures but non of them were romantic; you might have missed something, there might be someone else in Dynamight’s life. There is no way he is thinking about you so much, especially not after all the drama in the training room. He’s probably doing his best to forget those few hours so you can’t be the one the guy was talking about… right?

Kirishima is the next, the guy praises him for being the best friend and the best boyfriend the world has ever seen - Kirishima perks up from the sound of having a significant other in his future and he can’t stop smiling for the rest of the day. For Jeanist, his future isn’t as fluffy as the young one’s, the guy insist he needs to go on a vacation, but he gets some good news as well.

“Last one!” The guy moves to face you properly, and fuck, you are sooo not ready for this shit.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

“Last one!”

Oh. Katsuki zoned out for the entirety of Kirishima’s and Best Jeanist’s reading.

He has so much to think about; this whole reading sounded like the biggest scam until the guy laid him bare in front of his friends like a bitch. Katsuki didn’t lie when he said he’s happy being alone, but deep inside he always felt like there is something missing. The new feelings in his heart only made the void deeper; he can lie as much as he wants, but he absolutely loved the way his heart beat out of his chest from the sight of Y/N on the battle field. This doesn’t mean the Menace is the one though; she might have been at the right place at the right time to wake something up in Katsuki, sure, but it doesn’t mean she’s the one the guy was talking about.

“I will love you in every single universe.” Katsuki wakes up from his stupor to the future teller’s voice resonating in the small room. “I’m not sure what this means but it was a part of your reading and I really liked it.” He smiles at Y/N who’s red as a tomato. “You have quite a life story, miss Y/N. Or should I call you the Menace? As much as you insist hating that nickname your heart rate goes up every time you hear it, why is that, I wonder?” The guy does that fake chin touching/deep thinking face, and it’s extremely annoying. The menace doesn’t say a word, she’s clearly mortified. “You almost lost your life on the battle field…”

“That’s the past, not the future, you dimwit.” Katsuki interrupts.

“The past and the future are connected. I can see them both.” He responds, clearly tense from being interrupted in the middle of his reading. He takes a deep breath and continues. “…then you got dragged to another universe. You found something there you cherish, but let me tell you something; if you live in the past, you won’t see the bright future that’s ahead of you. Stop comparing those two and just look around; the path is clear and obvious, paved out for you to step on, yet you still stumble on the dirty, uneven grass.” He sighs again with his back hitting the back of his chair as an indication that the reading is done. “Also, there is a wedding in the future for all of you. Not yours, though. Someone else’s. But you’ll see when you get back to your office.”

A wedding? Another lie. There is no one around Bakugou who’s about to marry, this needs to be another bullshit.

“Thank you for your service, Mister!” Kirishima perks up and makes his way out of the building, skipping around like a lovesick fool. He clearly doesn’t care if it’s fake or not. He’s really easy to please.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

You were just about to leave the building when you felt a shoulder bumping into your own.

“Oii, fuckstick.” Bakugou speaks up, but instead of his usual fury, his voice is calm and subtle. You look up at the blonde; he is looking at you with hesitation in his eyes. “It was a good fight. Thanks… for doing that.” The blonde mumbles, his shoulders bumping into you again affectionately. “Can we stop being weird about it? It’s really annoying. I can’t fucking focus.”

Okay, what the hell is happening?! First the unintentional (or intentional?) flirting, now the shoulder touches and if that’s not enough to lose your shit, Bakugou just said the work “thanks”.

You died and this is your personal heaven. That needs to be it. This can’t be happening right now. If you need to look at his blushing face another second you’re going to propose.

If this is real life, then this needs to be temporary. Don’t get your hopes up. This is just a moment of weakness from the blonde. The sudden rising of your heart rate has nothing to do with your feelings, you probably just had way too much coffee in the morning.

“Yeah, it was really nice….” Oh fuck, those are not the right words! “I mean, it was a good fight. You are great. In fighting, I mean. Thanks. Yeah. Let’s do it again?” Jesus fuck, why did you say that?!

“You want a rematch?” The blonde laughs while he walks towards his car. “Yeah, I don’t mind pinning you to the floor again….” The blonde’s eyes open wide in a surprise when he realizes what he’d just said. His blush gets even deeper. It’s absolutely adorable. “I mean, I will definitely win next time. Yeah. I will clean the floor with your blood while using you as a mop…head. Yeah.” He stutters and opens the door for you to jump in. “Want a ride, Number One?”

“Y-yeah, Number Two.” You grin at the blonde as his face contorts into an angry frown.

“I hate you so much.”

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

The ride was absolutely exhilarating. Katsuki drives like a badass and he also has a good taste in music; that didn’t stop you from making fun of his taste though. You were bickering the whole time like two dumb teenagers and thankfully, this cleared the air enough to get rid of all the tension between you two. Everything is back to normal, thank fuck.

As you make your way into your shared office you find 2 envelopes on Bakugou’s desk; one for him and one for you. It’s gold and sparkly and smells like a fancy perfume.

It’s a wedding invitation.

“Fuck, that bloke was right.” Bakugou’s surprised voice fills the room. “But wait, I thought Denki and Jirou broke up again a few weeks ago?” The blonde asks, confused by the whole situation. The wedding invitation clearly states their name, so…

“Well, apparently I give great love advice.” You answer proudly; Denki did message you a few weeks after your meet up to say thank you, so you are not lying.

“Yeah, you are that middle aged person who hooks everyone up but can’t get a bitch herself.” Dynamight fucking giggles, the area around his eyes wrinkle happily with every movement. Who is this person and what happened to Dynadick?!

“Bakugou, we are far from being middle aged!” You snicker, with a slight blush on your face. “And also, low blow!” You try your best to look offended. “You know what, it’s fine, I won’t be lonely, because you’ll be there with me, you forever alone dipshit.”

Was it always this easy to fuck around with him or is this just a special occasion?

Why is it so hot in here?

Oh lord, this is bad.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

“I had a really weird day.” Mr. Masato tells his assistant while he drinks his beer like it’s water. “So this guy gave me a shit load of money to lie to these two people about their future; to make it look like they belong together and shit.” The jug knocks on the table aggressively as he continues his rant. “So the two came in, they literally looked like they hated each other, so I started to feel really bad about this prank… but then I read them and… they were actually connected by fate. They can literally fuck up every single thing and they’ll end up with each other anyway. I’ve never seen a bond so unbreakable. So I got this shit load of money and I didn’t even have to lie. I feel like I won the lottery.”

The assistant stares at him like this is the first time he heard human speech then throws up on the floor. Just like that.

“Good talk.” Mr. Masato sighs and stares into the space with dead eyes.

Mr. Masato feels like this is a great time to finally retire.

-> Next Part

💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~

Yes, I know I said I’ll be working on another project, but I’m in love with this story so much!

So, how are you guys feeling about the budding romance? I am absolutely thrilled! I literally want to cry from happiness!

Also, you won’t need to wait long for the next part as it’s already done! Might post it sooner if I see some comments under this part! No pressure. Really. ��� 💜

As always,reblogs, likes and comments are appreciated, they make my day 💜

Thank you for reading! 💥💜

Taglist: @ibkg @chuugarettes @lilmaimai

@nonomesupposedto @sozainturpal @luleck @notplutos

💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~ 💥~

[monstersinthecosmos]

I have no intention of watching the new IWTV show, but I was wondering why you think Armand's characterization was so bad. I kinda hated how Antonio Banderas played him in the 1994 movie (not on its own, just in comparison to the books - I feel like his personality/demeanor was totally different), so it's sad that they still haven't gotten him right... Judging from pictures alone, I did think the casting for him was more fitting this time. Anyway, just curious to hear your thoughts!

Oh man!!!!!!!!! I do wanna say up front, I think Antonio was NOT A GREAT ARMAND but I like those scenes in the movie so much because they feel SO RICEY to me. Like I LOVE Movie!Armand even though he isn't Book!Armand, and if you read IWTV in good faith it's the only book that doens't harp on Armand looking like a smol uwu cherub so like ! SURE. He definitely still brings the calm nurturing mentor vibe in a huge way and the scenes in his room feel the most like the books to me.

I also know from the director's commentary that they specifically wanted Armand to look like that so that the Europe vampires would feel like OLD WORLD SCARY vs like, another twink lol. So he's got a little more of a tropey Dracula vibe going on and I think like as a visual contrast it works really well.

As far as the show; I think Assad is EXCELLENT. And like the whole fandom was joking even when the credits hit IMDB that it was gonna be Armand because everyone was like "OHH ARRIGHT.. LOUIS'S """""ASSISTANT"""""" OKAY !" so like I was one of the conspiracy theorists looking for clues the whole time. And his MANNERISMS are dead on and gave him away before anything else did. I have zero issue with the actor, I think he's so spooky and a complete smokeshow which Armand DESERVES. And I wish I could like the show for him, I really do! But it's just NOT WORKING FOR ME.

I'll put the rest under a cut cause it got lengthy and I'm not trying to like be a downer on anyone's dashboard but TLDR the show is so completely unrecognizable to me and I think it would've been so much better as an original concept, and personally I'm not excited by randos who share names with the books I read. The show is a hit! People really like it! But idk like showing me these two random ass men and saying "Hey this is Daniel and Armand" doesn't excite me because the story they're showing me actually ISNT Daniel and Armand lol. I'm here for the story!!! I'm not here for Easter Eggs!

Here's my main few gripes with how they wrote Armand which I find mega disappointing:

He spends 6.9/7 episodes pretending to be Louis's assistant named Rashid. WHY! LOL. Why would he do that! DANIEL DOESN'T REMEMBER HIM ANYWAY SO WHY???????? I DONT UNDERSTAND. Like Armand is a weirdo but is he THIS WEIRD? idk. idk.

The show also (in my opinion!) horrifically botched Lestat, but there's like this grain of doubt because the show has a theme of memory being unreliable, so the speculation is that maybe Armand planted a skewed version of events in Louis's head? Even the show runner sort of hinted at this? LIKE I HATE THIS?? Because if we get to S2 and it turns out that Lestat's been misrepresented, it then turns the tables and makes it that ARMAND is the one who's horrifically botched????? Like I'm all for silly Armand jokes and memes and whatever but like. sigh idk i just looked really forward to this show and hoped to see Armand on screen and I didn't really want a meme version of him. ((Also as an aside I really dislike the unreliable memory themes on the show the way they're presented because like the books frame unreliable narration as like interpretive and emotional but the vampire lore canonically is that they have like mega supernatural photographic memory? idk. If memory is faulty because they still have that human fallibility it's one thing unless they're saying Armand planted memories in Louis's head??? idk idk.))

And like speaking towards whether or not Armand is a person who would plant false memories in Louis's head; I concede that he psychically influenced Louis to join him in IWTV but like. ARMAND IS A NUANCED CHARACTER WHO ACTS FROM A PLACE OF NEED AND HURT. And idk it's just so fucking clunky I can't imagine the manipulation taking this type of shape. There's just, to me LOL, a huge difference between the mental nudge of "You are lonely and you need guidance please come with me" and "Lestat was a horrific domestic abuser." And like. idk. Just within the package of the whole rest of the season, this team has the subtlety of dropping a fucking piano so I just have no trust in them to write him with any sense of nuance.

AND THE BIGGEST OFFENSE THAT I'M JUST COMPLETELY DISGUSTED BY IS THAT HE'S A DAYWALKER?????????????????????????????????????????????????

I just hate the daywalking shit so fucking much I can't even start. Like the show changes a lot of the lore which is fine whatever it's their show change lore if you feel like it whatever but like. ARMAND'S ENTIRE LIFE IS THEMATICALLY BOOKENDED BY DARKNESS. He grows up in a CAVE. He lives in a CULT BENEATH A CEMETARY. He tries to KILL HIMSELF by GOING INTO THE SUN.

Like. And he's only 500? That's like adolescent for a vampire LOL.

There were a couple times in the season where they had some continuity errors on the show!lore so I got the vibe that the writers didn't really care about all the VAMPIRE STUFF which is kinda disappointing to me bc I'm a nerd lol but it felt like they used Armand in the sun to just give the audience a red herring and it came across as really cheap to me. So I wouldn't put it past this team to kinda be like DAYWALKING SURE LOL and not really take it seriously or think about the larger picture of how that unfolds for the character over more seasons.

IT'S WHATEVER, I JUST. I know it wouldn't make good television but I like VC because it's like existential dread and consuming darkness, I want it to hurt me, I want it to feel bleak, I want Armand's entire arc to be about how much he struggles with the idea that there's no God. It just feels like if you can make it a few centuries and be able to withstand the sun, what's the fucking point? What sacrifice did you make for being immortal? Especially for a character like Armand who so fully believes himself to be damned and would never want to make another vampire, would never subject even an enemy to it.

Especially bc like in the show the vampires can like ? Smoke? And have sex? And they can eat food (even though it tastes like paste but they can eat food). IF YOU CAN SMOKE AND FUCK AND GO IN THE SUN YOU'RE JUST A GUY. Where's the fucking DAMNATION OF IT ALL? Also what's the fucking point of Those Who Must Be Kept if you can go in the sun lol. I just . Ugh what a clusterfuck.

The show turns vampirism into more of a power fantasy than the way the books treat it as damnation or a symbol of being othered so it doesn't really mesh with like, my idea of VC and what I want out of it.

So Armand being a daywalker = Instant Nope From Me. I'm not interested in whatever they're trying to sell me lol.

A few other things that are NOT confirmed but generally just giving me the ick that I worry about:

I really, really, deeply, truly, hated how they wrote Claudia's character and how they wrote about rape, and that gives me a really bad feeling about how they'd potentially tackle Armand's canon background. The two options are: They don't, and he's a completely different character with a different background, with completely different context for his personality/motivations/etc (in which case who the fuck cares he's just some guy who shares a name with the book I like, and not really Armand), or: They GO THERE and it's just extremely heavy handed and insensitive and not fun to watch. I think show!Claudia maybe has more in common with Armand than book!Claudia because they aged her up to be a teenager so it's just, yikes. THEN AGAIN ARMAND IS NO LONGER A TEENAGER ON THE SHOW?

And to that point like. I don't need a bunch of fucking conservatives getting in my face about how I want to see a teenager sexualized because that's not the point; logistically for TV it makes sense that he's older, but again, it changes his backstory so much. imho, Armand being turned as a teenager and looking like a teenager is a huge element of his character! It's important! It just is! And I'm sorry that the show decided that the vampires could have sex, because they invented this problem for themselves! If they kept the canon lore you wouldn't have to see them have sex anyway LOL.

I also was not a fan of the truncated timeline of the show; season 1 takes place in like 30 years I think? And covers from the beginning of the story until Lestat's murder. And I believe Louis will meet Armand in the 1940s; they have the original interview in the 70s and they're together then, and they're together in the present in 2022. Idk I'm just not impressed; humans can get divorced after 30 years too, what's the point of having immortal characters if you're not gonna stretch out the timeline? And so much happens for Armand and Louis in canon and I have no idea what's happened or not happened on the show yet, no one's really sure which events have happened yet in the present day segments of the show. So like idk there's just a lot of Armand/Louis stuff to be smushing into 70 years lol and I'm bummed that they're rushing through the timeline so much.

So I just. Sigh. There's a lot of themes in VC that I really adore that the show doesn't care about, like being VERY OLD and NEVER SEEING THE SUN AGAIN but. I'm in the minority on this one because people love the show LOL. I'm happy for everyone who likes it, but it's not for me.

And like. Just! I knew going in that it would be the Loustat Show, I think everyone knew that, I didn't have huge expectations for Armand/Daniel content but it's such a small part of the books that like it would've been nice to get a couple scenes or some gifs out of it or whatever. It just sucks that like they SET UP the series in a way that the Devil's Minion won't happen on screen. And it sucks that like, depending how long the show runs for or how long AMC retains the rights, this might be the only chance in my lifetime that I had to see Devil's Minion on screen and it's not going to happen.

It's just a bummer man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sorry to anyone who likes the show lol I just found it to be like mega disappointing and I don't think I'm going to watch S2, I'm too upset about Armand & Daniel LOL.

[chrisbitchtree]

I posted 6,749 times in 2022

That's 5,722 more posts than 2021!

850 posts created (13%)

5,899 posts reblogged (87%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@memes-saved-me

@grey-sides

@lazybakerart

@neonponders

@stevewhoreington

I tagged 6,449 of my posts in 2022

Only 4% of my posts had no tags

#billy hargrove - 4,543 posts

#steve harrington - 3,895 posts

#harringrove - 3,716 posts

#billy x steve - 2,563 posts

#stranger things fanart - 1,146 posts

#fic rec - 826 posts

#chrisbitchtree writes - 480 posts

#🥺🥺🥺 - 478 posts

#lemon - 440 posts

#😂😂😂 - 362 posts

Longest Tag: 135 characters

#everyone needs to do yourselves a favour and track down the four weddings and a funedal miniseries that was released a couple years ago

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

How I think the lead up to the shower scene went:

Billy: Tommy, do you think going up to Steve to talk to him while naked in the showers will make it too gay? I don’t want it to be too obvious that I want him

Tommy: You’re severely underestimating how oblivious Harrington is

Billy: Ok, so we agree that the naked in the showers thing is the right way to go? Will you come with me? It’ll seem less gay if it’s not just him and I

Tommy, shaking his head: You think adding a third naked guy to this scenario will make it less gay?

———

Bonus:

Steve, twenty years later, rolling over in bed at 3am: Hey babe, were you hitting on me that day in the showers??

1,190 notes - Posted August 29, 2022

#4

It takes Will a good 30 seconds to remember to close his mouth. He knows his mom says it’s rude to stare, but he can’t help it. He’s at the hospital with his mom while she checks in on Hop, and he decided to wander down to Billy’s room. If he’s being honest with himself, the other boy kind of scares him still, but Steve’s been on him like a mother hen since he’s been rescued, which means that Billy’s going to be a part of their lives now, if they want to be a part of Steve’s, so he might as well get used to him.

Steve, the reason that his mouth is agape. Specifically his arms. He has them raised, fiddling with some kind of wire that’s twisted above Billy’s head. And wow. They were not that muscled when Will saw him last. He’s sure of it.

Steve turns, noticing him, but Will’s thankfully managed to shut his mouth by then. “Hey Will, I’m gonna go find a nurse to figure out these wires. Keep Billy company for me while I’m gone?” He throws a wink in there and Will can feel his face get hot and red, right to the tips of his ears.

Will nods, at a loss for words.

Steve leaves the room, and Billy turns to him, a sharkish grin on his face. “Hey, fellow gay William.” He motions for Will to sit in the chair next to his hospital bed. Now that Steve and his arms have vacated the room, Will notices that Billy is shirtless. Even with his torso scarred, he’s too beautiful for words.

Will pulls out the chair and sits down, sputtering. “How…, I mean, I’m not. I’m not…” the last word comes out like a whisper. He’s still not used to saying it out loud. “…gay.”

Billy huffs out a laugh, giving Will a sympathetic look. “Sure you’re not. And I didn’t die for almost a year, only to be rescued from a Russian prison by your mother and the local conspiracy theorist.”

Will’s eyes go wide. He thought he’d been hiding so well. “Do you think anyone else knows?”

Billy shakes his head. “No, it’s a homo thing. Gaydar. I can spot another homosexual a mile away.”

Will leans in close. “But you and I are the only ones, right?”

Steve re-enters the room then. “A nurse’ll be here in a minute.” He looks between Billy and Will, clearly able to tell that he’s walked in on something private.

“Can you come here for a minute, Steve?”

Steve’s at his bedside in a flash. “What do you need? Water, another blanket, more pillows.”

“Nope. Just wanted to do this.” He grabs Steve by the front of his polo, pulling him in and planting a big, smacking kiss on him.

Will can see the tips of Steve’s ears go red, but he melts into it, gripping Billy’s shoulders and going in for another kiss, not for show this time. It’s honestly getting a little heated, and Will doesn’t know where to look, but then Steve pulls back, looking at Will as if he’d forgotten he and Billy weren’t alone in the room. He clears his throat and heads for the door. “I’m gonna go check on that nurse. I’ll be right back.” He almost walks into the closed door as he exits.

Billy turns to Will, his grin bright enough to outshine the sun. “What was that you were saying about you and I being the only gay guys in Hawkins?”

1,228 notes - Posted July 3, 2022

#3

A post-Starcourt world where Billy’s back home and Neil’s still there. Billy still won’t talk about the abuse happening at home, but everyone’s aware that it’s happening, so they make a pact to keep him out of his house as much as possible.

Dustin: Billy, can you help me with the DnD campaign I’m working on?

Mrs. Sinclair: I’m sorry, Billy. We didn’t get started with dinner as early as we thought we would, so Max isn’t ready to go yet. Why don’t you come in and eat with us? I made Max’s favourite, macaroni and cheese with hotdogs in it.

Steve: There’s a gross spider in my pool house. Can you come kill it? And while you’re here, I have movies and beer and snacks. You might as well stay. You can even sleep over, and I’ll make you pancakes in the morning, baby.

Nancy: Can read over this English paper I’m writing, Billy?

Hopper: Can you go hang out with El, Billy? I have to stay late at work and she’d appreciate the company.

Billy knows that Dustin prefers to work on his campaigns alone, that macaroni and cheese with hotdogs in it is far from Max’s favourite, and is actually his favourite, that he’s more scared of spiders than he is, that English is the one class that Wheeler did better than him in, and that El would prefer to have the time alone to talk on the phone with Mike, but he also never brings it up because he knows what they’re all doing and he appreciates the hell out of it.

1,775 notes - Posted July 10, 2022

#2

Billy, heavily influenced by his boyfriends soft lips, skilled hands, and sweet talking voice, starts sharing chauffeur duties with Steve.

The kids, all of whom except for Max are unaware that Billy and Steve are dating, are weary, but they need rides and trust Steve, so they take what they can get.

Despite multiple warnings from both Steve and Billy himself, it takes no time at all for the kids to start breaking the rules of Billy’s car, and soon, he’s furiously scrubbing footprints off the back of the front seats, picking up trail mix off the floor, and to his horror, scraping what looks suspiciously like dried snot off the window.

The next time he picks up the kids, he reiterates the rules, giving them one more chance to listen if they don’t want to start walking everywhere.

“Ok,” he says, looking them all in the eye in turn. “This is the last time I’m telling you guys. Feet stay on the floor, food stays in a sealed bag inside your backpack, and I can’t believe I have to say this, but your bodily fluids are to stay in your bodies at all times!”

Immediately, there’s a chorus of “But Steve lets us…” ringing out.

“But Steve lets us eat in the car!”

“Steve doesn’t care if we kick the seats!”

“Steve keeps tissues in his car!”

Billy doesn’t have the time or patience for this. “Listen up!” He shouts, turning around in his seat. “Do I look like a fluffy haired, Bambi eyed dreamboat that walks around looking like sex on legs?! Is my name Steve Harrington? No! I didn’t think so!”

It takes a not so gentle nudge and some meaningful eye contact from Max for him to realize what he’s said. No plea of temporary insanity or offer to let them eat in the car will buy their silence.

Steve’s very amused when Dustin races into Family Video, out of breath and red in the face, determined to be the first to tell him that Steve’s own boyfriend has a crush on him.

1,843 notes - Posted August 29, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Billy used to lend Steve his denim jacket when Steve would get cold. Max caught them making out once, Steve wrapped in the jacket, but never tells them what she saw.

When they all presume Billy to be dead, Max gives Steve Billy’s denim jacket. Steve tries to say no, that he couldn’t possibly take it. But Max can see the sadness and longing in his eyes, so she plays it off as if it’s a waste of a perfectly good coat for it to just sit in her closet. Steve accepts it, and after that, Max rarely sees Steve without the jacket.

When Billy returns, Steve tries to give him his jacket back. He just winks and tells Steve to keep it because “It always looked better on you, pretty boy.”

2,088 notes - Posted June 7, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[calamitouscynic]

What grabbed you in particular in the Palpatine being a creeper scribble? #curious

the fuckin,

everything

(also, this got Extremely Long, so there's a readmore cut now rip @beckyh2112 I'm sorry lol)

no, but in the first part you posted it was that last snapshot bit of fox trapped in Palpatine's mind or whatever it is? like, hold on I'm getting QUOTES for you bc I'm, screaming, eternally

OKAY, so from part one the Specific Part that got me hooked was

The Sith Lord carried a fox in his arms, its fur Guard-red, and a jeweled collar around its neck.

Mace let fury sweep over, through, and past him.

like, MACE. dude. and then the little introspection about him hating but not with his own hatred, and how Plo would. give that a chef's kiss, because its fucking magnificent

and then like in part 2, Fox's little section, where you can start to get a feel for how weird it gets, like, what I assume is being subservient to a sith fucking lord in said sith lord's own mind? fucking amazing.

and then there's this which makes me go white-hot with rage every fucking time, but it's so good

His owner chuckled. “Look at you being so sweet for me, pet.”

like, BEX, bex, you're killing me.

in part 3 (I think?) the entire section where the commanders are space!skyping to figure out what the fuck is going on with Fox is great. and the little bits of clone culture regarding telling how safe or out of a battlezone someone is by how much of their armor is off, and Wolffe needing sinker and boost nearby to make sure they're safe, Cody bringing rex to say hi to bacara, like, fucking phenomenal amounts of cultural insight in one paragraph dude, holy shit

and then the difference between the Corrie's and the rest of the troopers and how the guard treats getting to be a sith lords chew toys in ways that are Really Fucking Upsetting to anyone else hearing about it but that's just situation normal, all fucked up for them

and then, again, because I think the best part of this little series is the small but Deeply Upsetting sections from Fox:

Fox never strayed far from his owner. He wasn’t always within arm’s reach, but the two of them were always in the same room. Often, Fox curled up next to his owner, too tired to do more than chrr when he was petted. If he was awake to notice being touched.

He was just so tired. No matter how much he slept, he felt disconnected and drained when he faded back into consciousness. Always in his owner’s arms. Always hurting and distressed until familiar hands stroked him from head to tail and chucked him under the chin. Then his owner would feed him Dark little creatures, delicious on his tongue and nauseating on his stomach.

I'm just over here like that one conspiracy theorist meme dude from It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, or whatever it is, you know the dude, regarding Fox and Palpatine

because it is genuinely upsetting to me, but in a good way? like "If he was awake to notice being touched." disgusting, horrific, I want to tear Palpatine's hands off with my teeth and eat them out of sheer rage at that. and then the very last line? the thing about the little dark creatures? I am incandescent with rage

and then you go and describe it as "delicious on [Fox's] tongue and nauseating on his stomach" and what a way to get your point across, like yEAH BEX YOU GO BEX, that completely fucking vibes with how I think of the dark side

this is Much Longer than you were probably expecting rip, anyway TLDR fucking everything bex holy shit

no, but for real, its the interspersal (?) of the real world drama of people trying to figure out what's going on with fox, dealing with the end of the war, regular politics, etc, and then getting slapped in the face with fox trapped in a sith lords mind as his pet and how absolutely creepy it feels from the outside

phenomenal fucking job, you're doing amazing, I'm outshining the sun out of sheer rage at Palpatine

[geekybisexualwriter]

“I’m Glad You Kidnapped Me” (Five Hargreeves x genderneutral!reader)

Request: Can you do a Five Hargreeves x reader where Y/N and Five are friends and he finds out that Y/N’s mom is Cha Cha and kidnaps Y/N while they have Klaus. Y/N and Five become close and Cha Cha finds Five and almost drowns him and as Y/N is giving him mouth to mouth, he wakes up and they kiss. Thx 

Requested by: anon

(A/N: That was an amazing idea, anon! I hope I do it justice.)

(A/N #2: I accidentally deleted a different request, and I don’t remember much of it, so sorry if that was yours!)

(A/N #3: Sorry this took so long! I just started remote learning, and it is much harder than I thought it would be, and I have some family stuff to deal with as well(not getting into it). I’ll be updating as often as I can.)

Word count: 1672

Warnings: mention of kidnapping, slight fluff, waterboarding

Taglists: 

Permanent:  

@five-scoffee

@peepeeparkerr

@linthebinbag

5 x reader:

@sitherin-mxschief

@paradox-psychosis

Y/N sighs, staring out the window of the hotel room that they shared with Uncle Hazel and their mom. It was around midnight, and they were supposed to be sleeping so they could be on their A-game tomorrow to kill even more people. 

They hated it more than anything. They would do anything to be whisked away, to not have to deal with- 

And suddenly, they were knocked unconscious by a panting Five, standing over them with a baseball bat(idk how he got it). He picks them up and gets in a car that he stole, setting them down in the backseat with a smirk.

*THE NEXT DAY*

Y/N was sleeping soundly on the couch in the living room in the Academy when they wake up to yelling.

“What the hell, Five? You kidnapped a person!” A woman with long dark hair with blonde highlights glares at a boy who seemed to be around Y/N’s age.

“Yeah, that’s messed up man.” A man with short dark hair and piercing dark eyes shakes his head at a boy with a school uniform on.

“This can be used to our advantage! I now have a bargaining chip to use against Cha Cha!” The Boy (just accidentally did an homage to the comics. Nice.) says, tired of his siblings’ empathy.

“The ‘bargaining chip’ has a name and feelings, you know.” Y/N sits up and glares around at the group of adults and one boy, who all stare at them. “And one of the feelings that it’s feeling is anger.” 

“I don’t care about your feelings, but I do care about your name,” The Boy says, his patience clearly wearing thin(per usual). “What is it?”

“Like I’m telling you, you’re the person who kidnapped me,” Y/N says with a death glare at him. “I don’t trust you.”

The Boy growls but keeps his anger in check for a change. “Fine. I’ll tell you mine. I’m Five Hargreeves, and you are?”

“You’re Five Hargreeves? A boy?” Y/N chuckles. “Like I’m going to believe that. The real Five Hargreeves is like eighty.” 

“Fifty eight.” Five grumbles. 

“I really don’t care. Let me go.” 

“Not until your mom finds you. And then you can go back to her, but not until you give me information on what they’re going to do next.”

“Well, that sucks for you, because I’m not telling you anything,” Y/N says, a big smirk on her face. Of course, that feeling was only skin-deep, because she had no idea what they were going to do. They wouldn’t tell her anything, not that she was interested, although it would have been helpful right now.

“Oh, you will.” Five chuckles darkly. “Trust me.”

“I don’t.” Y/N snaps. 

Cha Cha wakes up at 5 am on the dot every morning, rising from her bed and looks to the place where she always first looked on a mission(which was pretty much constantly), her child’s bed, usually finding a sleeping Y/N, who would be normally snoring quietly. But this time, she found her worst nightmare.

Y/N was gone. 

Cha Cha’s eyes widen, and she runs from her bed to Y/N’s, tears running down her face. “No no no no no no…” she mutters to herself repeatedly. “HAZEL!” 

Hazel, the lazy one, slowly opened his eyes to look over at Cha Cha. “Hm?” he mumbles, barely registering anything, let alone tears. “What happ’n’d?” 

“They are nowhere to be found.” Cha Cha says quietly.

That sure woke him up. “Y/N?” 

Cha Cha nods, not having enough emotional energy to say a sarcastic remark about how obvious it was that it was Y/N. “And I think we know who it was.” She says, her voice filled to the brim with the perfect mix of anger and worry.

Five pours himself a cup of coffee, pleased with himself. “I should probably get them something to eat…” he mutters, going upstairs to some room that he had chosen for Y/N. And by chosen, he checked to make sure it didn’t belong to anyone else and shoved them in there. 

Y/N was sitting there, a million possibilities on how to escape flying through their head when they hear the door open and look up to see Five. “Oh. It’s you.”

Five rolls his eyes. “Yeah, no shit. I just came here to see what you are and aren’t allergic to.”

“Oh, so you won’t let me starve out! That’s a relief.”

“Yeah, so that you can live to give me information on your mom and her partner.”

“Oh, no way. Although, my opinion might be changed with my appetite…” 

Five studies their face for a moment and chuckles. “Absolutely not, you’ll just make me steal you stuff and then you’ll never tell me anything. Oldest trick in the book.”

Y/N sighs in fake defeat. “Aw, man! That was my entire plan, all foiled by you again, Hargreeves!” They laugh. 

Five laughs a bit too despite himself. “You’ll never defeat me, …?” He looks at them questioningly, realizing he still hadn’t gotten their name.

Y/N thinks for a moment. Well, they did like him, but not that much. Wait, did they just think that? “Robin.” They say, deciding that they would think about that more in-depth later(if your name is Robin, then just replace it with Casey). 

Five nods slowly. “You just gave me a fake name, didn’t you?” 

Y/N shakes their head. “Nope. Robin/Casey is my real name.”

“I don’t believe you, but that doesn’t matter right now. So, for real, what is it that you’re allergic to?”

Over the next few weeks, Y/N and Five became closer and closer. Unfortunately, so did Cha Cha and Hazel at finding out where Five Hargreeves was located.

Cha Cha smiles to herself in front of one of those big pinboards(like the one in the conspiracy theorist meme). “Finally…” she whispers. Hazel comes up next to her with a couple of cups of coffee. “Find ‘em?”

Cha Cha takes one of the cups and sips from it gleefully. “I sure did. Now let’s go kick some ass.”

Y/N grins, moving their scrabble piece to create the word ‘vivacious’ earning them twenty-one points and the game. “I win!”

Five glares at them. “You must have cheated somehow. I never lose.”

“Oh my gosh. You are SUCH a sore loser!” Y/N laughs harder shifting themselves into a better position on the living room floor. 

“I am not! I just don’t like losing!” He exclaims.

Y/N chuckles and starts to reset the pieces. “Another game?” 

Five was about to agree and vow to defeat them this time, but he was interrupted by a loud crash. 

“Y/N!” Cha Cha yells. “WE’RE HERE, HONEY!” she runs up to Y/N and gives her a quick hug and a kiss on the head. “Go to Hazel, he’s outside. I’ll deal with this… thing.” She looks over at Five in distaste and a deathly glare.

“No,” Y/N mutters, barely being heard as they glance at Five.

“What was that, sweetheart?”

“I said no,”(not relating to this whatsoever but if you’re a fan of Heathers the Musical, search up I Say No deleted song) Y/N says more clearly and meets her mothers’ eye line. “You are not going to kill him.”

“And why not, dearest?” Cha Cha mutters through gritted teeth.

“Because… of the Commissioner. She will ask questions about why he is dead, you know.” Y/N says, thankful they found another way other than admitting their feelings.

“So smart…” Cha Cha’s hand cups their cheek with a loving smile. “But quite frankly, I’d rather die than let you be trapped here.” Her hand drops down to the space where her gun was supposed to be. “Oh come on...” she mutters. “I forgot my own damn gun.”

Y/N’s eyes light up. Maybe then she wouldn’t kill Five! Best case scenario, Y/N leaves and Five’s okay. They’d rather stay here with him, but they’d take this over Five dying any day of the week.

Cha Cha’s eyes graze over the mansion. First thing you learn about as an assassin? Everything is a weapon. Her gaze captures the sink and her smirk starts to grow. Guess she would be doing this the old-fashioned way. 

With a smile, she grabs Five’s hair, thankful that he was a kid again and was easy to push around. And before either Five or Y/N could react, she drags him over to the sink and turns on the tap violently, sticking Five’s head under, waterboarding him. 

With wide eyes, Y/N rushes over to her mother and starts pulling Cha Cha’s arm yelling at her to stop. Five was turning blue and struggling to get out of her grasp. 

Finally, Cha Cha slips up and is pushed to the floor. She tries to get back up but is pushed down again by an angry Y/N. “Leave. Now.” Their voice shakes with anger. 

“Sk-” Cha Cha is cut off. 

“No. Leave right now.” 

Cha Cha sighs and gets up, walking out the door. “Come back to me when you’re ready to admit that Five Hargreeves is nothing but an assassin who kidnapped you!” She yells.

Y/N ignores her and gets to work, putting Five on the ground, giving him mouth to mouth and pumping his chest up and down.

“Come on…” she mutters, leaning down and doing it all over again.

Suddenly, Five starts coughing up water, the color slowly returning to his face. “Y-Y/N?”

Y/N nods, their eyes welling up with relief tears. “Yeah. It’s me.”

Five smiles and sits up slightly. “So, was that the only reason why you didn’t want me to die?”

They shake their head. “No… there was another reason.”

“Oh?” Five looks at them, not really believing that someone like them could love someone like him.

“I think I’m in love with you.” Y/N looks at him, smiling nervously.

“Well, I know I’m in love with you.” Five smiles back, leaning in to kiss them. 

Y/N grins and kisses him softly and then pulls away. “I’m so glad you kidnapped me.”

[pers-books]

Jen de Critique's Casebook

Dear Jen de Critique, I am a committed socialist, and I hate prejudice of any kind: racism, homophobia, classism, sexism, ageism, ableism, you name it. However, I find trans people a bit yucky. Can you offer any advice about how to reconcile my pro-equality views with my feelings about trans people? Yours sincerely, Tribune of the People Dear Tribune, I’m glad you asked! Actually, I have lots of advice. So much, that I’ve divided it into a multi-point plan! Demonize ideas, not people We’ve all been there. We want to: • deny trans children access to medical care • be able to humiliate trans people at work without consequence • make it impossible for trans people to go to the toilet without fear of assault or arrest However, oppressing a marginalised group sounds bad for a person on the left. The solution is: stop talking about trans people and start talking about “trans ideology.” When you say you’re against trans ideology you’re invoking not images of human beings being stripped of basic rights but a vague, scary, faceless idea. Better still, you’re gesturing towards powerful, behind-the-scenes forces - a powerful cabal with a stranglehold on lawmakers, judges and the media. (The fact that there are no trans lawmakers, no trans people in the judiciary and no trans people in senior media positions might seem to be a problem, but never fear! Simply because there are no trans people in those positions, it’s not something you’ll ever be asked to address.) One point. It’s probably not a good idea to be too specific. JKR’s favourite, Magdalen Berns, linked the trans movement to George Soros, but that just made her sound like an anti-Semitic conspiracy theorist. Better to keep it vague! The vaguer, the scarier and the harder to disprove. Ignore your bedfellows. The biggest promoters of anti-trans propaganda are of course the right-wing press; The Times, Telegraph, Mail, Economist, Spiked, etc. The biggest funders are conservative organisations, often linked to anti-abortion and anti-women’s rights agendas. The biggest promoters of anti-trans legislation are right-wing governments: Bible-belt states such as Tennessee and Texas, or authoritarian countries such as Hungary and Russia. And, let’s not forget that our own Liz Truss, the Equalities Minister, who just called on government departments to cut ties with the UK’s premier LGBT rights organisation, is in fact a Tory. I admit this doesn’t look good. Perhaps you’re asking whether it’s likely that Rupert Murdoch, Liz Truss, Viktor Orban and the rest have your best socialist interests at heart? In answer, I just ask you to think back to previous occasions when Left and Right found common cause. The Hitler-Stalin pact, for example – that worked out fine in the end, right? Again, perhaps you’re worried that trans people are just being used as a wedge issue, and that once the precedent has been set the same tactics will be applied to suppress gay rights, abortion rights and women’s rights. To that objection, I reply - “Oh look, there’s a trans person over there, that’s your real enemy!!!!!” Women and children first! One of the problems we face is that trans people are objectively harmless. At this point, for example, there is ample evidence from around the world that trans women are no danger to cis women in toilets, changing rooms or anywhere else. But don’t worry! A visceral mental image of a bestubbled man waving his willy about will make much more impact than facts. Moreover, as 1950s lynch mobs and 1970s homophobes alike proved, framing someone as a threat to women (especially white women) and children is a very effective way to by-pass the need for evidence. As a good feminist, of course you deplore the idea of women as helpless beings in need of rescue whenever you meet it in a Grimm fairy tale or a Hollywood movie, but for now I need you to put all doubts aside and embrace that meme wholeheartedly. Don’t worry – it’s just a means to an end! The Cloud of Unknowing Finally, please do all you can to preserve your ignorance of trans people and issues. This requires constant vigilance, but thousands of fellow lefties have proved that it can be done! The internet may have made it more difficult in one sense, but the echo chamber nature of social media has been a godsend in others. In particular, please be careful to stay ignorant of the following… Gender theory. Just as philosophy was once said to be footnotes to Plato, so for you, all real gender theory is footnotes to Janice Raymond. You can safely dismiss developments such as intersectionality (suggested phrase: “a distraction from the real issues”), and thinkers such as Judith Butler (“bloviated postmodern nonsense”). Mostly, of course, you can and should absolutely ignore what actual trans people have to say about their own experience. “Nothing about us without us” doesn’t apply here! You definitely shouldn’t read Julia Serano or Susan Stryker, any more than you’d listen to gay people on sexuality or Black people on racism. The one exception is of course that, if you can discover a detransitioner or a self-hating trans person, you should definitely make them into your spokesperson and wheel them out at every opportunity. They are rare, but they are a precious find! It’s not in any way the same as finding a woman who supports patriarchy and pretending that she speaks for all women. (Unfortunately, I don’t have room to explain why here – just take my word for it.) Biology Science is messy and complicated, so it’s best to steer clear of it and stick to a few slogans, such as “Sex is real.” (This one has the advantage of implying that trans people deny that sex is real, which makes them seem unreasonable.) Don’t, whatever you do, talk to actual biologists or psychologists currently working on the subjects of sex or gender. They are obviously interested in maintaining the trans-friendly status quo, and their testimony can be ignored. (Side note: you may have wondered whether people with intersex conditions complicate the issue. My advice? Acknowledge they exist, but in the next breath make sure to dismiss them as a negligible minority.) Hate groups Groups such as the LGB Alliance and Woman’s Place UK sound, from the names, as if their primary purpose is to advance the rights of LGB people and Women respectively, right? Certainly, their names don’t suggest that they are exclusively or almost exclusively anti-trans hate groups. Goodness knows, women face much bigger problems than the existence of trans people; while the LGB Alliance must surely spend most of its resources and influence in fighting anti-LBG legislation, advising on inclusive language and policies, and so on? It’s basically like Stonewall used to be before it became trans inclusive, right? My advice is, just keep believing that. I definitely wouldn’t go to the LGB Alliance web site to see whether all their activities are in fact anti-trans focused, along with a side line in delegitimating any other sexualities than LGB and straight. To be on the safe side, forget everything I said in the previous paragraph. Trans People It’s best not to meet trans people at all. If you must, make sure it only happens in high-tension environments where they will necessarily be at a disadvantage: e.g. by challenging them to an impromptu debate about whether they should be allowed to exist, demanding they immediately give you a watertight definition of transphobia, etc. If a trans person behaves badly, you are perfectly entitled to take that behaviour as representative of all trans people everywhere. (Of course, if you extrapolated in this way with, say, someone of a particular ethnicity, it would undoubtedly be racist; but, as I’ve already explained, for our purposes trans people are more appropriately treated as ideas than human beings.) If you can't avoid them, remember that all trans people fall on one side or other of a very sharp line. Either they are a gross parody of the gender they identify with (a trans woman wearing make-up or a skirt! A trans man who works out!) or they fall far too short of it (a trans woman with hairy legs! A trans man whose voice hasn’t dropped!). The only certainty is that they will always fail, and that with your well-honed gender-critical skills you will always be in a position to call them out on it, and to know that you’re defending feminism and humanity from the evil trans menace in the process. Good luck! Jen de Critique

[Source]

[ambvrs]

[  HANDE ERCEL,  CIS  FEMALE,  SHE  /  HER  ]  shh  !  JOSEPHINE  AYDIN,  the  TWENTY  ONE  year  old  SECOND  year  GRAPHIC  DESIGN  &  CREATIVE  WRITING  major  from  EDINBURGH,  SCOTLAND,  is  known  as  an  AMBER  around  here.  SHE  was  invited  to  join  because  SHE  UNEARTHED  STRATHMORE'S  BEST  KEPT  SECRET,  and  now,  they’re  here  to  stay.  SHE  reminds  me  of  HOT  CUPS  OF  COFFEE  CRADLED  IN  SWEATER  -  CLAD  HANDS,  KNOWING  GAZE  CAST  OVER  THE  PAGES  OF  A  WELL  -  VERSED  NOVEL,  &  RIBBONS  TYING  BACK  SEA  OF  DARK  CURLS.

hello  friends  🥺👉👈  i’m  andie  (  she  /  her,  twenty  one,  est,  no  stable  sleep  schedule  )  &  i’m  here  to  bring  my  precious  babie,  the  second  -  year  amber,  josephine  aydin  !  i’ve  included  a  link  to  her  google  docs  (  which  is  extra  as  all  hell,  please  don’t  @  me  )  which  has  most  of  the  information  i  have  on  her,  but  for  everyone’s  sake,  i’ll  include  some  tl;dr  bullet  points  here  !

biography  .

josephine’s  google  doc  includes  a  stat  breakdown,  how  she’s  perceived  by  a  number  of  people,  her  aesthetics,  a  more  or  less  biography  (  which  apparently  i’ve  basically  detailed  below  i  am  too  long  winded  for  my  own  good  ),  and  a  handful  of  wanted  connections  !  i’ll  have  it  up  on  a  page  on  her  blog  soon  !

the  basics  .

third  youngest  of  the  aydin  children,  josephine  was  constantly  overlooked  in  favor  of  her  established  prodigy  siblings;  a  brother  who  inherited  mother’s  natural  skill  for  music  and  a  sister  who,  while  not  musically  inclined,  took  after  her  mother’s  obvious  drive  for  ambition.  perhaps  she’d  be  a  doctor  like  her  father,  top  of  her  class  and  a  prime  candidate  at  any  prestigious  medical  school,  or  an  actress,  for  she  already  commanded  the  stage  well.  but  josephine  showed  no  interest  in  any  of  those  things,  so  unlike  her  family  that  most  forgot  she  bore  the  aydin  name.

a  youth  best  spent  in  shadows,  at  siblings  every  performance  and  undoubtedly  their  number  one  fan.  she  didn’t  blame  them  for  her  parents  disinterest  in  her,  and  for  what  it’s  worth,  they  were  always  the  ones  most  willing  to  get  her  to  step  out  of  comfort  zone.  to  try  new  hobbies  and  activities  her  parents  had  discarded  for  her.  she  was  still  young,  but  her  siblings  offered  her  an  unwavering  support  just  as  she  did  them.

a  wild  imagination  and  an  eye  for  finer  details  lead  her  to  be  a  publish  writer,  even  if  it’s  in  just  the  smallest  sections  of  the  school  newspaper  or  your  english  teacher’s  bulletin  board.  an  avid  member  of  the  writing  club,  the  school  book  club,  and  a  visitor  to  most  art  classes,  she  took  more  joy  in  what  is  hidden  within  books  and  on  paper  than  how  she  appeared  to  others.  she  took  great  pride  in  her  work,  of  course,  but  she  almost  never  called  attention  to  herself;  growing  up  sheltered  from  the  critical  eyes  of  others  will  do  that  to  you.

(  death  mention  tw  )  short  stories  that  detail  her  siblings  as  knights  and  fair  maidens  and  her  parents  as  the  evil  that  plagues  the  kingdom,  it’s  no  wonder  her  parents  were  never  privy  to  her  interest.  but  for  every  story  detailing  them  as  her  savior,  she  could  only  wish  to  be  theirs  when  news  of  their  death  reaches  her.  both  killed  under  mysterious  circumstances  in  their  childhood  home  while  parents  were  away  and  she  was  on  a  school  trip,  she  bears  their  death  as  though  she’s  at  fault.  as  if  she  could  have  done  anything  to  save  them,  and  she  would’ve  done  it  all,  if  she  could.

the  end  of  her  secondary  school  career  is  plagued  by  their  loss,  one  that  weighs  heavily  on  her  shoulders  and  heart.  parents  who  can’t  bear  to  look  at  her  as  a  reminder  of  what  they’ve  lost,  who  push  her  so  far  away  that  her  only  solace  is  strathmore,  an  entire  country  away.  they  do  not  bid  her  farewell  and  she  does  not  seek  their  approval  when  it  comes  time  to  decide  her  future’s  path.  a  double  major  in  creative  writing  and  graphic  design,  a  knack  for  creativity  finally  unlocked.

no  longer  the  other  aydin,  she  created  herself  as  josephine  within  strathmore’s  walls,  her  own  dreams  and  ambitions  and  no  more  crushing  weight  of  parent’s  expectations.  but  it  is  a  dangerous  line  she  walks,  always  too  curious,  too  used  to  being  a  fly  on  the  wall,  for  her  own  good  and  innocent  research  into  any  number  of  topics  -  history  of  the  school  you  now  call  home,  of  words  she  heard  whispered  like  a  ghost  in  the  wind.  as  if  they  hadn’t  been  real  at  all.  it’s  in  the  midst  of  researching  for  a  story  when  she  stumbles  across  something  more  concrete,  the  same  latin  words  whispered  now  doting  some  of  the  oldest  books  the  library  held.

it’s  a  rabbit  hole  she  can’t  pull  herself  from,  free  time  spent  learning  about  a  society  so  secret  that  it’s  mere  existence  seemed  like  a  myth.  she  doesn’t  put  much  stock  in  it,  of  course,  surely  it  had  slipped  away  like  most  clubs  do  over  time,  until  the  mysterious  individual  stood  waiting  outside  her  dorm  at  the  start  of  the  year,  equally  as  questionable  invitation  in  hand.  symbols  and  latin  both  equally  recognized,  instinct  tells  her  that  she’s  dug  too  deep  and  they’re  ready  to  keep  her  quiet.  but  it’s  not  near  as  malicious  as  over  -  active  imagination  declares  and  she  finds  herself  at  a  small  advantage.  but  how  advantageous  was  it  to  know  of  secrets  that  were  kept  that  way  for  a  reason  ?

the  opal  society  is  sketchy  in  the  way  she  imagined  most  things  of  this  nature  to  be,  right  up  there  with  questionable  greek  life  activities  behind  closed  doors,  but  there  is  excitement  that  buds  eagerly  in  her  chest.  a  chance  to  be  a  part  of  something  bigger  than  herself,  to  know  she  was  picked  out  of  thousands  to  uphold  a  legacy  that  stands  for  more  than  what  most  would  think.  she'd  made  friends  easily  enough  before  this,  but  now  she  has  friends  that  she  shares  something  special  with,  an  experience  as  trying  as  it  was  bonding,  and  she  couldn't  be  more  excited  for  what  was  to  come.

more  aesthetics  .

glossy  lips  tinted  strawberry  red  curled  into  ghost  of  a  smile,  cheeks  kissed  by  the  winter  wind,  the  habitual  tugging  of  a  loose  thread  from  worn  sweaters  and  pressed  button  -  downs,  elegant  script  turned  messy  scrawl  in  a  flurry  of  last  minute  notes,  the  pastel  color  coordination  of  detailed  notes;  so  well  kept  that  it’s  impossible  not  to  follow,  polaroid  photos  strung  above  dorm  room  bed;  memories  always  kept  so  close  to  heart,  cracked  spines  of  leather  bound  books  read  too  many  times,  the  feeling  of  cool  metal  jewelry  pressed  flush  against  skin;  dainty  silver  professing  an  obvious  delicacy.

wanted  connections  .

the  fellow  creator.  someone  with  a  craft  all  of  their  own,  be  it  a  shared  interest  in  the  literary  arts,  a  visual  artist,  or  musical  prodigy.  perhaps  they  share  it  as  an  interest,  or  is  something  they've  both  managed  to  excel  at. 

the  unlikely  friend.  someone  she  never  would  have  crossed  paths  with  outside  of  the  opal  society,  who  she  would  never  have  befriended  otherwise.  not  because  they  differ  so  greatly  that  a  friendship  was  impossible,  but  because  they  never  would  interacted  on  campus.

the  rival.  perhaps  it  is  a  rivalry  that  stems  from  knee  -  jerk  dislike,  or  someone  that  rubbed  her  the  wrong  way  or  with  equally  notable  skill  in  an  area  she  considers  herself  just  as  adept.  always  at  each  other  just  trying  to  be  the  absolute  best  at  whatever  they  do.

drinking  buddies.  for  as  quiet  as  she  is,  she’s  a  whole  other  person  when  loosened  up  by  alcohol.  someone  she  can  share  a  few  drinks  with  and  just  hang  out  with  for  hours  at  a  time.

conspiracy  theorist.  i’m  not  saying  that  josie  fully  believes  in  conspiracy  theories,  at  least  not  outwardly,  but  she  definitely  enjoys  them  conceptually  and  will  broach  them  for  hours  with  you.  please  don’t  enable  her.

this  tag  (  that  i’m  not  directly  linking  bc  aesthetic  tags  are  the  Devil  )  and this tag  !

anything  and  everything  thank  you  please  plot  with  me  i  like  memes

[twilight-zoned-out]

What Just Happened

In which Peter and Ned have a grand old time wading through Flash's Spiderman conspiracy channel until they get back from Europe and everyone finds out who Spiderman actually is. Based off of two posts (although currently I can only find  one of them!).

Update: Here's the other one!

 Part I: The Context

It began as a joke.

Ned found it, surfing the web (as he often did) for Spiderman-related articles. Now that he knew Peter Parker, aka Midtown’s smartest and most heroic but also-kind-of-a-flake-when-it-came-to-events-but-for-a-good-reason teen was actually Spiderman, he redoubled his efforts with the added goal of making sure nobody ever got too close to Spiderman’s true identity.

Which is how he found the youtube channel.

“Hi, my name is Eugene Thompson, commonly known as Flash, and today we’ll be beginning a series of videos akin to what some of my peers might refer to as ‘Behind the Mask.’”

Ned stopped it right there and called Peter Parker.

“Dude, it doesn’t matter what you’re doing right now you have to come over.”

“What? Why?” Slight static ran in Peter’s background – no doubt caused by Peter’s frantic efforts to get to Ned’s room. Or maybe he was just shifting the phone to multitask with his homework. Static meant a lot of things.

“I found another Spiderman conspiracy video and I feel like it doesn’t exist in the same dimension I’m living in.”

“Did it say I was alien?”

“No – well, I don’t actually know. I haven’t gotten to the conspiracy part yet. But it has to be good.”

“How do you know?”

“You’ll get it when you see it. Come over, I’ll wait. I’m only 8 seconds in.”

“Don’t you have a test to study for?”

“Quiz, and it’s Tuesday. Besides, we both know that won’t take long.”

“You, Ned Leeds, are a bad influence.”

A tap tap tap came from Ned’s window. He grinned as he drew away the curtain to let Peter inside.

“It didn’t take much to convince you.”

“Yeah, well, you piqued my intere-” Peter’s jaw dropped open at the sight of Ned’s laptop.

“I know, right?”

“That’s Flash.” Peter turned to face Ned and pointed at the screen. “That’s Flash Thompson from Midtown School of Science and Technology.”

Ned’s grin grew. “You understand my pain.”

“I don’t know if I understand anything.” Peter flopped down onto Ned’s bed, then sat up. “Okay Flash, what have you got.”

Ned settled back into his very comfortable spinny chair and brought the video back to the start.

“Hi, my name is Eugene Thompson, commonly known as Flash-”

Peter snorted.

“-and today we’ll be beginning a series of videos akin to what some of my peers might refer to as ‘Behind the Mask.’”

Flash wore a suit without a tie and stood next to a series of boards, hands clasped behind his back.

“For me, it doesn’t matter. I have one goal in mind.”

Flash’s gaze intensified as he leveled with the camera.

“Who is Spiderman?”  

Peter and Ned watched silently, enraptured, until Flash actually started rolling out the theories. Then Ned actually had to pause it because the both of them were laughing too hard.

“There’s a whole series,” Ned managed to get out between fits of laughter.

They watched them all. Peter even got Ned to subscribe to ‘Spiderman Thomspiracies,’ as it was.

“I’m surprised he hasn’t promoted his channel to the school,” Peter commented.

“You know Flash. If people actually find out Spiderman’s you, he probably doesn’t want to be proven he was wrong.”

Peter briefly sobered at the idea of being figured out, then lightened. “I guess we’re never going to prove that he’s wrong, then.”

The channel had surprisingly few viewers before Ned and Peter got a hold of it. Then Ned started promoting it through his magic tech ways, and it really took off. Flash still didn’t mention it during school.

But his series was a hit.

‘Out of all the theorists I’ve watched, you’re the best!’ One of the comments said, and given how Ned and Peter were the only ones not to take the channel seriously (as far as they could tell), the only conclusion was that the comment – and the tens of others like it – weren’t being sarcastic. A good portion lauded him for endeavoring to use science, physics, and logical theory to determine or invalidate hypotheses, and surprisingly enough, when the topic was about who Spiderman couldn’t be, he had pretty good reasoning. It was the opposite side of the spectrum that took him off the rails – and he went there a lot.

One of his theories became so convoluted and over the top (it spanned a few episodes) that Peter and Ned had spent an actual 40 minutes trying to map out his train of thought. It took four sheets of paper, and at the end they just dissolved it into a galaxy brain meme.

Peter’s sophomore spring turned to summer turned to fall. Junior year rolled around, and Flash’s search to figure out Spiderman hadn’t slowed down. In fact, he’d been given a boost.

“I just want to say thank you for 1000 subscribers, it really means a lot for you all to support my work. We’re getting closer to discovering Spiderman’s true identity every day, I can feel it.”

Then the blip occurred.

Somehow, in that timespan, Flash’s videos grew big. Bigger than his channel had a right to be.

When five years came and went, and Peter and Ned had just started to adjust to everyone else’s way of life, Spiderman Thomspiracies appeared like a ghost. They made the time to watch it.

 “Hey guys, it’s been a while, I just want to say thank you so much for pushing this channel on strong. I was blipped, apparently, and it’s crazy. I don’t know if I’ll have time to do videos like this for a while, but I just wanted to let you all know that I’m starting up an Instagram where I can talk to you guys about what’s going on, you know, my experience, and maybe you guys can catch me up on some things. Starting with your thoughts on Spiderman. Five years should be enough time to crank out at least one video.

“I’ll make it easy for you. Catch me on SpideyNo1Fan. Flash Thompson out.”

Peter and Ned stared at the screen long after the video ended.

Flash had reached approximately 13,922 subscribers.

Part II: The Event

“Hey guys, it’s been a crazy week. But you’d already know that if you watched my previous videos. Gotta say, being saved by Spiderman in Europe is pretty dope. Now I’m back in home sweet New York, and – aw thanks dude, you’re the best. See, this is why I livestream: it’s so much easier to connect with you all in real time – hold up.” Flash looked up from his phone, then swiveled himself around to put the giant advertisement-turned-news screen behind him. “Looks like something’s going on.”

“The following moments may shock you.”

Flash shot a strange look towards his viewers, falling silent as the news clip ran its course.

“Do it. Execute them all.”

Flash’ jaw dropped.

“There you have it, folks, conclusive proof-”

“What?!” Flash looked at his invisible viewers furiously as the side of his screen lit up with people clamoring to know his opinion. “This is ridiculous. Something else has to be going on here – I know Spiderman, I see him almost every day. Spiderman saved the day! He’s not like that - How long have we known Mysterio? I mean, he saved the day, but Spiderman, there’s no way-

“But that’s not all, folks. Here’s the real blockbuster.”

Flash raised an eyebrow as he commented to the masses. “I’ll get to the bottom of this, don’t you doubt.”

“Spiderman’s real name-”

Flash froze.

“Spiderman’s real name is-”

“No.”

The word came out as a half-wheeze whisper. Spiderman’s identity had been kept from the citizens of New York – nay, the world – but working together in Europe, there was a possibility Mysterio actually did know who was behind the mask-

“Spiderman’s name is PETER PARKER!”

An image of said person blew up on the screen behind Flash, who let out an ungainly shriek, eyes bugged out to the max.

“I’ve gotta go,” Flash stammered out, voice uneven, after enough of a pause for the news segment behind him to begin relooping. “I’ve gotta figure this out. Flash out.”

With shaking hands, he ended the livestream. He felt like he couldn’t breathe. He felt sick.

Out of all the possibilities for who Spiderman was, he’d never once thought Peter Parker.

Flash, still standing there gaping at his own reflection through the turned-off screen, made for the closest bench and sat himself down heavily. He had to work this through.

The news on the screen in front of him returned to its revolutionary image; Flash’s focus intensified, trying to absorb every detail. Trying to find the flaw.

It couldn’t be Peter Parker.

.

Peter had raced away immediately after the video and ended up on top of the old Avengers tower. He didn’t even want to check his phone, want to see all the texts flooding in.

But he had to call Aunt May. He’d do that first.

Once she knew where he was and he’d assured her that he knew what to do if bombarded by questions he didn’t need to answer, he hung up and called Ned.

“Ned. Ned. I am freaking out right now.”

“Okay, this is bad.” Ned didn’t even try to put a positive spin on it; despite his own opinions about sharing Spiderman’s identity, he knew what it meant to Peter. “Where are you? I’ll come over. We’ll face it together.”

“No. I’m still in the suit. I left MJ – oh man, people saw me with MJ earlier and I just…I just left her there-”

“I’ll contact her, it’s fine. Guy in the chair.”

“Guy in the chair.” Peter blew out a shaky breath. “You can’t tell them anything.”

“…Peter,” Ned replied, a little confused. “Your picture was up on the screen. The secret’s out.”

“No. I mean, the rest of the news wasn’t true either. They said I killed Mysterio, which-” Peter suddenly went silent.

“Peter?”

“I didn’t.” Peter’s voice was small and tight and high-pitched. “He fired the bullet and it ricocheted off my suit and hit him. I didn’t have time to figure out where it would go.”

“Dude, I believe you. You didn’t kill Mysterio.” Ned changed the pace of the conversation. “Anyway, this whole claim is ridiculous. Who would actually believe you’d want to kill Mysterio? You’re the friendly neighborhood Spiderman.” Ned sighed. “I’ll try to keep you posted with what I can find. Are you sure you don’t want me to come over later? I can bring pizza. Or you can visit my place. I’ll explain to my parents that you aren’t a super-murderer.”

“I’m not a super-murderer-”

“I know, that’s what I just said, you aren’t a super-mur-”

“Just- don’t say that right now. Please.”

“Okay. I’ll check up on you later.” Ned hung up, and Peter let out a sigh. He couldn’t hide in the building forever, and reporters – or even police, Peter realized with a jolt – might be waiting for him at Aunt May’s. If he didn’t come soon, they might have to take the Bugle’s footage at its word.

Was that how it worked? Was that even legal? He wasn’t sure. American Government was senior year.

His phone vibrated.

Incoming Call from Flash Thompson, his phone read. Peter rested his head against the wall. Flash was among the last people he wanted to talk to at the moment.

He let the phone call go to voicemail and ignored it.

His phone vibrated.

Hey I need to ask you something for social media.

Peter’s eyes widened with a start. In the stress of the moment, he’d almost completely forgotten about Flash’s channel.

Incoming Call from Flash Thompson, his phone read again. Peter answered on the first ring.

But Flash didn’t seem smug. Or menacing. The only thing he asked when Peter picked up was a simple “Is it true?”

That flew Peter for a loop. Disoriented, he responded a beat late. “Flash-“

“It’s true, isn’t it.” Flash didn’t even need Peter’s confirmation. “At first I thought, ‘no way Parker’s actually Spiderman.’ I mean, you guys are nothing alike. But then I thought about it more, and I realized – there’s no way you have family in Germany. You weren’t even when any of the Elementals attacked, and they followed us everywhere – wait, you didn’t plant the elemental attacks, did you?”

“What? No, of course not.” As upset as he was about the event, Peter was more upset that somebody would believe something so blatantly unrealistic.

“Of course not,” Flash agreed, speech coming through as if his mind were elsewhere. “You’re Spiderman.” His voice came back to focus with a snap. “Oh man, you’re Spiderman. I can’t believe this is happening.”

It was over. Peter wanted to cry. “Flash, please, you can’t post about this on your conspiracy channel-”

“You know about that?” There was suddenly a smirk in Flash’s voice, but it didn’t have any disdain attached to it. “I’m pretty big on there, aren’t I?”

“Flash, seriously, this is a big problem for me. Anyone with something against Mr. Stark or an avenger knows who I am now and they’re going to come after me and Aunt May and possibly the school-” Peter took in a deep breath, trying to formulate words.

“Don’t worry man, I got you.”

Flash hung up the phone.

Twenty seconds later, Flash’s Instagram updated.

‘Getting to the bottom of this insane claim. Guess you’ll see another video sooner than I thought!’

Peter put his face into his hands and groaned. He didn’t even know what to make of that.

.

Another vibration.

Hey. It was MJ. You okay?

Yeah, Peter responded. You?

No thanks to you.

…

I’m joking, I’m fine. Do what you gotta do.

Ned texted him around the time, too.

Hey, MJ’s safe, I’m safe, are you safe?

Safe enough to respond to your text. How’s Aunt May?

Holding down the fort pretty well. Do you think you’ll have to come to school on Monday?

Bigger problems.

Right.

.

The video uploaded about an hour later.

“There’s been a horrendous accusation floating around the figure we know and love as Spiderman. Today, I’m here to prove to you that this lie has been purported by the media and is not possible. Ever.”

Flash spent 20 or so minutes describing his first-hand experience in Europe and extol Spiderman’s actions. Then he veered off course. “Now, I’m sure you have some questions about the other claim made by the Daily Bugle – a site which I’m pretty sure none of us have heard of until now. Particularly, concerning Spiderman’s true identity.” Flash then filled the time doing what he did best – making fun of Peter Parker. He went through numerous examples of what Peter Parker was like, and although Peter tried to reason that the bullying was an attempt to help him out, he was a little less grateful when it stretched for 15 minutes.

Flash ended the video with a sober expression.

“As you know, every theory has both impossible and plausible components to it. But ask yourselves: if Spiderman, who you’ve seen and known as a hero, and Peter Parker, who you now know as a wimp, were in that position on the London Bridge, do you really think either of them would want to kill the great Mysterio? Do you think either of them would even think about doing something that ruthless? That dastardly?

“We are far from finished with the topic of Spiderman. But while I work tirelessly to achieve the high standards set long ago for this channel, ask yourself that question, viewers, because something doesn’t add up. Flash Thompson out.”

Peter took a minute to digest what he’d watched. Then he called up Flash. Of course, Flash was the first one to speak.

“Pretty great, huh?”

“Flash…”

“Don’t thank me. I already know what you’re going to say.”

“You…didn’t try to convince them I wasn’t Spiderman.”

“What – of course I didn’t. Do you think I would blatantly lie to my fans? I’ve built this channel off of trust. And math. And logical reasoning. And I did you a favor. People need to see you as a hero instead of a weird power-hungry monster, so that’s what I’m driving at. You’re not a power-hungry monster, right?”

“No!”

“No. Obviously. Because you’re Spiderman.” Flash paused. “Man, I still can’t get over that. I just want to make sure you know that I totally respect you as Spiderman, but as Peter Parker, everything I said in the video still stands.”

Peter sighed. “Thanks, Flash.”

“No problem. If you need PR, I’m the guy. As Spiderman.”

“Great.”

Part III: The Effect

Peter finally got back to the apartment (thankfully in one piece) and Aunt May and him where sitting together on the couch with hot chocolate when his phone began to vibrate.

“I don’t want to answer it,” Peter half-murmured.

“You should put it on silence,” Aunt May suggested helpfully. With a groan, Peter moved to do so.

The text was from Flash Thompson.

Sure you don’t want my offer on PR?

Peter’s brow furrowed in confusion.

Before he could dismiss it, his phone vibrated again. It was from Ned.

Dude. Check the video. Check Flash’s video right now.

Peter refreshed the page – he hadn’t even deleted the tab yet – and carefully set down his hot chocolate so he could plop heavily onto the couch.

Aunt May shifted closer, concerned. “What? What is it?”

Peter shook his head, disbelieving. “Just…” He was going to have to explain the whole thing. For the moment, he just showed her the screen.

Flash’s video had reached 1 million.

[the-space-above-the-stars]

to all the boys my brother hangs out with

intro | a love letter, sleuthing, and six boys

Summary: Lee Y/N gets a love letter delivered to her through her brother. And through some quick investigating and the process of elimination, she figures out that the only possibility to who the sender is is one of her brothers friends.

Warnings: none, a love confession?

Genre: fluff

Word Count: 1.1K (it’s short, but it’s just an intro)

Pairings: NCT Dream x Reader, platonic!Liu Yanyang x Reader, brother!Mark Lee x reader

“Okay, I accept that,” Yangyang continued. “But you have to admit there’s something cool about romance,” 

“For the last time, Yang,” you groaned, unlocking your locker and taking out some textbooks, carefully packing away your school-issued camera. “I would take a bullet for you, I will help make props, I will help sell tickets and run the show, I will take photos for yearbook, but I will not act in your production of Romeo and Juliet.” Yangyang helped run the slightly understaffed and underfunded school drama department, and this year’s production of Romeo and Juliet was providing him with some challenges. 

“Okay, even as the tiniest role? Romeo’s mom is only in a few acts? Or we can dress you like a boy and you could be one of the dudes fighting in Act 1? They’re only on stage for 3 minutes, max.” His desperation is slightly amusing, and you roll your eyes, stumbling back a second later as something pulls on the back of your bag. 

“Hey Y/N-ie,” scowling, you look up at your brother, Mark, dangling something in front of your face. “Next time you’re exchanging love letters with a guy, can you please make sure they put it in the right Lee’s locker?” 

“What the fuck do you mean, love letters?” He shrugs and hands you the envelope he’s holding. It’s a plain white envelope, with your name written on the back. “Who the hell is sending me love letters?”  Mark shrugs again. “Beats me. Come on, open it-” 

“Mark!” The voice takes your brother’s attention from the letter to the group of six boys, his friends, standing at the end of the hall. Lee Donghyuck, the one who yelled, nods his head towards the end of the hall. “Come on, we’ve got class!” 

“Coming! Tell me what it says later, okay?” Mark takes off, Na Jaemin wrapping an arm around his shoulders. Donghyuck waves at you, and you wave back before the boys leave. 

“Who sent you a love letter, Lee?” Yangyang bounces around you like a puppy, impatient for you to open the envelope. 

“Hold up, hold up, let me open it.” Tearing it open, you pull the plain piece of notebook paper out of the envelope and unfold it. The writing’s in messy blue ink, your eyes widening more and more as you read it. Fed up with you silence, Yangyang takes the note and guides the both of you to a quieter place in the halls, reading aloud.

“Lee Y/N,” he starts.

Lee Y/N,

I’ve been hiding a secret for the past few years, and I’d say I’ve been pretty good at it. But high school’s almost over and I figured now or never, right? The truth is, I like you. I’ve liked you since you talked back to Mr. Choi in AP Chem and got sent to the principal’s office. At least, that’s when I figured out I liked you. You’re smart, and funny, and so super talented at whatever you try, it’s almost annoying. And not that this even matters, but you’re also the prettiest girl on campus, you can quote me on that. God, I’ve never written someone a love letter before this is awkward. But yeah, we’re confessing feelings here, so I like you, Y/N. And it feels good that you know that now, even if you don’t know me.

“Signed ‘an admirer’. He literally kept this shit anonymous- but what the fuck Y/N, you have a secret admirer, that’s so cool! Oooh, what if it’s that cute guy from your Psychology class?” Yangyang’s more excited than you, the initial shock still setting in as you take it from his hands.

“Who? Who would write me a love letter? And why would they slip it to Mark instead of me? And why- okay, does this dude think he’s getting away with this secret admirer bull?”

***

And so, many hours later after you had sorted through your emotions and hate a good plate full of your mom’s M&M cookies, you and Yangyang sat in your room, staring up at the glow in the dark stars stuck on your ceiling. “So he’s a senior, we know that.”

“Or he could be a junior? I mean, a lot of us are already facing that high school’s almost over crisis, so it could be a junior or a senior.”

“Okay, it’s a guy. I can tell because I’m a guy and this dude wrote you a love letter on a piece of ruled paper in blue ink.” Picking up the letter again, you let your thumb trace over the drawing in the corner, a neon red bleeding heart. An absentminded doodle? “And he put it in Mark’s locker, but why-“

“Y/N?” Another of Mark’s friends, Lee Jeno, pokes his head in the door, flashing his signature shy eye smile. “Mark sent me to see if you have his extra gaming console?”

And as if magic, a light bulb lights up above both your head and Yangyang’s. Who would know Mark’s combination? You knew it, as a safety in case he forgot, and you knew Donghyuck knew it, from all the times he’s stashed his stuff in Mark’s. So wouldn’t it be safe to assume all of Mark’s friends knew it? “Uh, yeah Jeno, here.” He leaves, and you and Yangyang turn to look at each other, bearing a small resemblance to the shocked Pikachu meme. 

“It’s one of Mark’s friends.” You say in sync, cue to your mental breakdown and Yangyang looking like that meme of the crazy conspiracy theorist.

“That’s why they put it in Mark’s locker! They don’t know the combination for yours!”

“It could be any of those 6 guys sitting downstairs in my living room right now, Yangyang.”

“Okay, okay, lets make a list.” He grabs a piece of paper and a red marker, and you count down Mark’s friends one by one.

Huang Renjun

Park Jisung

Na Jaemin

Zhong Chenle

Lee Jeno

Lee Donghyuck

“Wait!” Yangyang has an epiphany, grabbing the list again. “This dude said you had AP Chem together a few years back! So wouldn’t that cut out Chenle and Jisung, they were just freshman!”

“No, they were TA’s in that class, they signed up for the same period,” You think back to that AP Chem class, where Mr. Choi sat you in the back for the whole year. From that perspective, you would remember everyone in that class. Jisung and Chenle sat at the front as TA’s, Donghyuck sat by Mark near the door, Renjun was the quiet one, near the window, and you were sandwiched between Jeno and Jaemin. 

“Every single person on this list was in that class,” you groan, the struggles of secret admirers becoming tiresome already. “That doesn’t help us, Yang!” 

“But I mean, we’ve got some progress!” Ever the optimist, Yangyang tacks the list up. “It’s one of these 6 people, you just have to figure out with one. Now come on, best place to start is at the beginning. 

1. Huang Renjun, the transfer student from China. 

A/N: This was short but I meant to make it as more of a sort of introduction to the actual story! Part one will take place with Y/N figuring out if Renjun did or did not send the letter. I’m really excited to start this story, so if you have any feedback of want to be added to the taglist, please do send in an ask or a DM!

- Sabrina

@chikinika

[faketextsfromlastmight]

Best of tags #13

A compilation of my favorite reactions to this blog.

A chat about Iida wanting to move to South America (Link):

@displacerlovesmyhero said:

I mean, some people just want to hide the bodies in South America.

@frankly-ludicrous said:

Toss 'em in the fucking Grand Canyon or something! We don't need your corpses stinking up the place, we have our own corpses to take care of!

I feel like I stumbled upon two rival crime bosses arguing about territories and now I’m terrified.

@theproxy066 on Shigaraki recruiting Bakugou and Tokoyami: (Link)

I like this, but wasn't Tokoyami picked out last-minute by Mr. Compress?

You know that shitty friend who only wants to hang out with you at the beginning of the month when your credit card is full? Well that’s how I treat the canon.

@hotonten on the D.E.K.U. method: (Link)

The U should be changed to "unconditional love"

LOVE?!!! Urgh! Are we even reading the same manga? Midoriya is a creeping black widow and he’s here to get the DOUGH. Watch out, Iida, Midoriya’s looking at your inheritance!

@abraxax-heart on Aizawa playing favorites: (Link)

This is a lie because Aizawa also dearly cares for Bakugou, Mirio and Eri (though she’s not her student… Yet). AND is also incapable of restraining himself when faced with problem children. He has to adopt them.

Forget the gender spectrum! The new way to illustrate your personality is: where do you fall on a scale from “Aizawa hates kids” to “Aizawa adopts every single kid he meets”. And now the weather.

Joke aside, I do think Eraserhead likes his students, he’s just terribly demanding of them because of his... troublesome history with the superhero system. Does he train Shinsou on his work hours, though? There might be an issue with that as he’s not part of Class 1-A (yet) so spending that much time on training a kid instead of his own students might get Aizawa in trouble. My personal headcanon is that Nezu doesn’t mind because Mineta is inevitably going to get expelled and they’ll need another student to replace him.

@nemon0416 on Kaminari and the lack of a Nobel maths prize: (Link)

Denki. I hate to break it to you...

I think Kaminari’s still correct. The Nobel prize does not reward mathematicians because that field does not directly and immediately help Humanity in a practical, applicable way (this policy has been criticized over the years and does not reflect my own views on the matter).

Although the Fields medal and the Abel prize are commonly nicknamed “the Nobel prizes of mathematics” by journalists because they’re of equal prestige, these two awards are not affiliated with the Swedish Academy which chooses the Nobel laureates.

@samqui801 on the short-lived Todoroki family sitcom: (Link)

#the fuck is todavia todos todoroki#i mean the real name of the show

The backstory I imagined for this is that Endeavor wanted to build up his image as a “family values” superhero because that was the one thing he could do that All Might couldn’t. So his plan was to coerce his wife and children into playing fictionalized versions of themselves in a family sitcom he produced, wrote and directed himself. An unholy mix of “Full House” and “Keeping up with the Kardashians”. He chose to film it in Bolivia because he heard that country had a special tax loophole which allowed him not to pay child actors (in that case, his own children). However Bolivian law required Endeavor to produce the TV series under a Castillian name rather than a Japanese one. Annoyed, Endeavor simply opened a dictionary and looked for words beginning with “Tod-”. Hence “¡Todavía todos Todoroki!” was born... and cancelled after only one episode. Endeavor considers one of the most shameful failures of his career and turns red at the mere mention of it. However the pilot episode did not fall into obscurity as Endeavor as hoped. Instead it has developed a cult following similar to Tommy Wiseau’s “The Room”. Fans post memes of the ridiculous TV pilot all over the Internet and perform reenactment during live viewings. Natsuo sometimes attends them to recount his miserable experience filming the pilot and to throw some shade at his father. Shouto is however too young to remember the shoot as it was produced during his enfancy (when Enji was still trying to “make the marriage work”).

Wow, that was longer than I expected.

@cjgryffindor714 on Shotuo taking soba baths: (Link)

Don’t forget he only likes soba cold so he’s in a cold soba bath

Oh my gods, you are right. This is even less sexy than I envisioned.

@inbrightshadows on Shouto helping Inko plan her husband’s murder: (Link)

#also Inko: What kind of laser are we talking about?#have any gun recomendations?

Well Endeavor’s still alive so obviously Shouto can only recommand which guns to avoid when purchasing online.

@chr0nosaur on Iida’s birthday gift: (Link)

#imagine getting an alarm clock for ur birthday..

Well some people don’t have to imagine it. Thanks, Mom and Dad!

@theodericc on Sero being an underdog: (Link)

#sero isn't an underdog#he's amazing

I mean he’s an underdog in the sense that he’s really overlooked. Then again not being a protagonist also has its perks... I guess he doesn’t have to worry about having a tragic backstory and stuff. My fear is Horikoshi kills him off for easy drama.

@eduarddragonpaw on Todoroki playing Minecraft: (Link)

Weirdly I feel like this is what todoroki would do or call creepers :bakugoes"

I don’t know, Bakugou doesn’t seem to like giving hugs. Creepers definitely do.

@haisley on Shigaraki’s big speech: (Link)

#hes doing his best

Or his worst, depending on your point of view.

@emkamereon-kaiba on Rei also being a conspiracy theorist: (Link)

*inhales* THEORY-ROKIS

Plot twist: Dabi is not a Todoroki but started believing he was one because he read conspiracy theories on the Internet. Shouto and Rei also subscribe to the theory which involves a complex plot of Enji/Endeavor hyponitizing them to make them forget what Touya actually look like, and hiring an actor to play Touya. Heroes and villains have to make an alliance of circumstances to sit Dabi and the Todorokis down for an intervention and help the real Touya explain he’s not an actor.

@yuuri-katsuki-nikiforov on Midoriya’s step-dad: (Link)

Who is it?? The stepdad

For the sake of the joke, the stepdad is just an original character. In my mind he’s a lover Inko took while Hisashi was abroad and who started taking on a fatherly role out of convenience. He’s now more of a father to Midoriya than Hisashi, hence him refering to him as his “step-dad”.

@ghostintheshale on Toga wanting to skin Spinner for a handbag: (Link)

#if toga so much as points a knife in spinner's general direction i will personally stomp her to death with my hooves

In this house we stan A+ scalies/centaurs solidarity representation in the media, haters don’t interact!

@samqui801 on Iida’s dietary habits: (Link)

#maybe this is the reason why im not tall i didnt wash my bananas before i eat it#and i was blaming the lack of exercises when i was young

I think I remember a paper implying that eating banana skins increased the risks of cancer, so who knows?

[larriefails]

First off, I’m not a rad nor a larrie, I’m a louie who hates both. I was just commenting on that because I’ve been in the fandom since 2013 and the de facto leader comment not only came from the boys but also during a billboard interview. In the billboard interview, they highlighted how Louis was the one taking the business calls and talking to their team about certain things. Also it’s not completely impossible to believe that once the 1d train ran out the big producers/names didn’t care to +

Work with him, because he was no “harry styles” liam is the same he even said that Simon didn’t want him on his label as a solo artist despite him having a great rapport with him. But there were other times louis’ business contacts were brought to light such as when he went to the Brits in 2016 and a reporter commented on how he was constantly on his feet to greet big name record executives and businessmen. He has the connects in the business that’s all I was trying to state.

Look, 99% of the time when I reply to an anon “you sound like a conspiracy theorist” it’s not because I think they believe in Larrie or because they’re rads, it’s because they fucking reason like conspiracy theorists

And your reasoning here is just… conspiracy theory mess. I don’t care which parts of it you believe or not, I don’t care what your personal feelings on these specific sets of conspiracy theories are. It doesn’t matter, the point is that you’re reasoning like a conspiracy theorist

I was gonna put this in a separate post, but I think it fits here very well (I might still make a separate post about it who knows)

A few days ago, I saw this video on twitter of a woman talking about her own death like it was nothing in a very matter of factly way, wearing a wig and using a very funny tone. Someone in the replies linked to her IG page so I went to look at it, and when I saw comments telling her “thank you for accepting my follow request” I realized she was usually on private and I’d just been very lucky to find her profile to be open, so I followed her just in case with the intention of watching her funny videos later

Since she was a new follow she continuously appeared on my recent IG feed and I soon realized how relevant what she was saying was to my interests

This is the woman

One day she posted this, and my alarms went off

Let me clarify that I don’t care if she’s a professor or a therapist or not, I followed her because I thought she was funny and that she’d go on private soon, this was all a complete surprise to me. The DM rang close to home to me, seeing as I’ve read Larries for a while now, it was all too familiar, her reply was too

Then she posted this

Once again, I said it before and you can read it here X it doesn’t matter if she’s a professor or not, if their suspicions are real or not, if she’s lying or not, because going through UCLA’s professor roll call is a step too far, and confronting her about it, even more so. And the way she presents it.. she’s right. She just linked the website, she never claimed to work there. If you go to her page, she’s very careful with the information she provides, so the people that want to prove she’s lying have very limited resources. They go with the preconception that she’s lying so they try to find ways to prove their preconception

You have the preconception that Louis was the de facto leader of 1D, so you’re working your way backwards to prove it. You’re looking at bits and pieces of interviews that will prove your theory right, but that’s just not what reality is

“The de facto leader comment not only came from the boys” .. no it didn’t, though? They didn’t say this. Do you know where the “the boys say Louis is the leader” comments come from? Stuff like this

Context for that interview? The Hot Desk, August 2011 X

One Direction had exactly ZERO songs out, this interview was recorded before they even released WMYB. All 5 of them had written on 3 songs of their first album that would come out in November. Savan Kotecha was still running the show. Louis was still 19 and he hadn’t been in show business for a year. How much of a leader that conducted business meetings do you think he was? I’m not gonna watch the entire interview to see the context, but this is not Zayn saying Louis was the de facto leader, this is Zayn kidding

What to even say about this, which is from the video diaries in X Factor?

Or this?

What? No, no they’re not, like, they’re just not, they’re standing in a circle and looking forward

This is just ridiculous

Does the person that created this gif set not realize that this is the performance where Louis doesn’t sing at all? It’s Torn at judges’ houses. It’s infamous for the fact that only Liam Harry and Zayn sang. This is all for dramatic effect because X Factor was a reality show

Louis liking motivation chants means he’s the leader? That he goes to business meetings? I’m so confused

That’s not because “he’s the leader” that’s because he’s the class clown

If accepting an award means he’s the leader then I guess this meme fits 1D very well

They all accepted awards, Christ

Anyway….

And that’s an entire gif set that was solely engineered to show that Louis was the leader and that “the boys said so”…. but they actually didn’t? The only two times it comes up they answer jokingly and it’s before Louis could do anything remotely leader like. But that gif set is so popular, created by a Larrie but that spilled out to the general fandom enough that I saw it on my dash reblogged by non CT blogs X

And it created this notion among some people, especially those who have Louis as their fave, that the other members of 1D had in fact said that Louis was the de facto leader, when they didn’t. It’s conspiracy talk, scouring through hundreds of MILLIONS of milliseconds of footage to pick 9 of them and put them in a gif set to prove a point they’d already decided on

There are also three news articles linked (copying and pasting directly from the source, sorry for the weird formatting idk how to take it off)

1: That’s the number of hotel rooms in Mexico City used for dance rehearsals. The guys locked down a room for three hours. Louis took control of the rehearsals and even helped conceptualize some of the routine.

That’sabout 1D learning the choreography for Best Song Ever

How exactly does it prove that Louis is the de facto leader for him to take over 1 dance rehearsal when everyone in 1D had confessed they couldn’t dance a million times at that point? Louis had some musical theater experience, so that’s that..

Harry: Louis is still loud and mischievous - he likes to test the boundaries. He’s quite outspoken. You need someone like that, because he’s great at standing up for us as a band.

That’s perhaps the most “leader like” comment any of them have ever made about Louis, and it’s not really about him being a leader once you put it by itself instead of surrounding it by “look at all the times they said he was the leader,” right? It’s just more of a testament about the fact that Louis was louder than the rest, which we already knew. If someone had asked me six months into my journey in the fandom who I thought was the loudest in band meetings I would’ve said Louis. That doesn’t mean he’s the leader. A leader has SO many more characteristics than being loud and outspoken. In fact, a lot of leaders aren’t loud or outspoken at all

The last link they put is once again, what How I Met Your Mother explained as the cheerleader effect X which taken away from the time period sounds quite misogynistic but let’s not dwell on that. Basically, it’s when a group of women appear hot when they’re all together but not individually. When you have the gif set all together, it looks like “wow, these are hot arguments as to why EVERYONE thought Louis was the leader,” but look at them individually, see their context and they’re not as hot now, are they? Especially when you realize, once again, that these are very very small morsels of time taken from very very large portions. That’s how Larries operate

Several people in your management and inner circle have described you to me as the unofficial businessman or leader of the group. Is that a fair assessment? I’ve sometimes felt like that, but to be honest most of the time I’m the immature one who needs to be told to get focused. I’m a bit of a perfectionist so I have to be kind of be on board with every minor detail and [I’m] quite opinionated.

And that last link is also the Billboard interview you mention in your ask. Do you know when it’s from? December 2012. One Direction had just released Take Me Home, their second album, which according to the interview that Larries love the most to base their sabotage conspiracies, didn’t very much involve 1D’s input at all

Savan Kotecha: I think by album 3 (Midnight Memories), yeah, not all of them, there was definitely one or two-one especially-that was like, kind of bitter about the fact, that, you know

Ross Golan: They were a boyband?

Savan Kotcha: And he was not the talented one. He wasn’t the singer, and he wasn’t the star. And you know which one I’m talking about…

Ross Golan: Of course.

Savan Kotecha: And he then started having something against me and against that process, I think. And, you know, maybe we could have been more inviting in the creative process during album 2 (Take Me Home) and not been so…authoritative.

At that point, Louis STILL wasn’t in a position where he could really be the leader. None of them were because the creative process wasn’t inviting still. It wouldn’t be until the third album

The conclusion here isn’t that Louis isn’t outspoken, or that he didn’t care about business or that he didn’t defend the band, or that he didn’t want to write more, or that he didn’t want to make connections. No one here is arguing that he didn’t care at all or not giving him credit for anything. The point I‘ve been making for days now and that people don’t seem to get (one way or another, because I’ve gotten very unpleasant messages about how he’s not equipped to be a businessman and shit like that that I’ve just decided not to publish at all), is that things don’t have to be black and white

I don’t think ANYONE was the leader of 1D. I think that Louis’ personality made him stand out more in certain aspects (such as meetings with their team), and because people need to label everything all the time, instead of describing it as it was, it took the position of “de facto leader”

The problem here isn’t even that people believe he’s the de facto leader, that wouldn’t concern me at all in and of itself because who cares? It’s not hurting anyone… The problem is that it puts an excessive amount of weight on Louis’ shoulders, I also explained this. It’s this dichotomy of a person who basically carried the whole band during its five years but that also is completely defenseless and at the mercy of binding contracts to even choose the socks he wears

These sort of preconceptions aren’t harmful by themselves, they wouldn’t be harmful in a normal band. I wouldn’t have a problem with this preconception if Louis was Calum Hood and this was 5SOS, my problem is that this is One Direction and preconceptions and conspiracies have tormented these guys for YEARS. No conspiracy and no preconception is innocent, they all have to be dismantled, we have to examine EVERYTHING that leads to absolutes if we want a chance at healing the fandom, and I don’t mean the 1D fandom because that’s gone now, it’s never gonna heal, I mean Louis’ specifically

If we want a chance at him being left alone from Larries these things have to go. Stop seeing him as this commodity that you can just paint over and start seeing him as a person, not a caricature

That interview also doesn’t say anything about him taking any calls business or otherwise. I don’t think anyone has ever said it and I have no idea where it came from because I’ve found zero sources. The interview doesn’t mention him “talking about certain things“ either, it’s just what I pasted here. That’s all of it. Everything else comes from years and years of stretching this one question out of this one interview done when Louis was still 20 and 1D had less than 2 years in the music industry. It’s no exactly the smoking gun y’all think it is, guys. Same with the Savan Kotecha podcast

Then the rest of what you say is just noise, man. IDK what to tell you. It’s just noise. If Louis had ran the show BTS for five years, then he’d have access to the best producers and writers on speed dial, why would he not being Harry Styles hinder how he’s perceived by the people that work backstage? They’d recognize the person that was “the backbone of 1D” for who he is because those things spread in the business. If LOUIS said that wasn’t happening, then it’s because your preconception was wrong and you took a bunch of things out of context to create a “narrative” that simply wasn’t real. Louis was dedicated to the band and wanted to write for it and involve himself in the creative side and he GENUINELY WAS IMPORTANT for the band, but he wasn’t its backbone or its de facto leader

Simon didn’t wantt Liam on his label probably because he couldn’t afford him, btw. He decided to stick with Louis because they’ve been thick as thieves since 2014 and those contracts cost money and Syco is a very small label with very limited resources, so they couldn’t offer anything to more than one member. I’m  aware that I’m making assumptions here, but they very much align with reality, especially now that Syco lost so many other acts and now that Fifth Harmony disbanded and Syco landed only Lauren (Camila being like Zayn) and having to leave Ally, Dinah, and Normani go to other labels. That doesn’t mean they saw no value in them (in fact, I think Lauren is the one faring the worst), it’s just that they can only afford so much

And how much can you grin on one report written by the HUFFINGTON POST in 2016?X I’m talking about the “Louis hugged industry people that one time” comment you made. Once again, I’m not saying he doesn’t know anyone. I’m saying I BELIEVE WHAT HE SAYS. If he says he can’t easily get the producers and writers he wants, then I’m going to believe him. And that one report doesn’t really change anything for me. It’s, once again, very conspiracy theorist behavior to put more weight on an isolated report from an untrustworthy source three years ago than on Louis’ own words. If he really had enough reach to be friendly with everyone in the industry, then he’d be able to get any producer he wants

You can’t have this dichotomy that you present in this very ask of “they’re not picking up the phone because he’s Harry Styles” but he was the de facto leader of the biggest band on the planet for five years and everyone in the music industry knows him. It just doesn’t mesh together. You’re placing him in the same impossible position Larries are placing him and that’s harmful. He needs fans that see him as a person and you, I’m sorry to tell you, do not. You see him as a caricaturesque figure that can both be incredibly important and incredibly subjugated

“He has the connects in the business is all I was trying o state” 1. no that’s not all you were trying to state. 2. According to himself, he doesn’t have all the connects. He’s clearly close enough to be friendly with Rob Stringer, but that doesn’t mean that Rob Stringer will lift a finger for him and according to Louis, he’s not.. But that doesn’t mean that Louis can’t get ANYONE or that he’s being sabotaged. As always, truth lies somewhere in the middle. The only reason it’s harder to spot in this case is that people stretch it on every possible side so much

I know this is long as fuck and I probably lost any person that was willing to read my drivel in the first place, but I just really think it’s important that you start taking what LOUIS SAYS ABOUT LOUIS as fact, instead of twisting it around to present alternative facts that would present a reality that will please you more. It starts at “Louis was the de facto leader” and it ends as “he’s been faking fatherhood for three years and lied about his mother’s last few days” Sick..

[redheadgleek]

Anything with a 9 for the ask meme thing :)

9. How tall are you? Not quite 5′4. 

19. Do you want a church wedding? The likelihood of me ever getting married is pretty slim (I certainly wouldn’t take that bet). And I broke up with my church about 3 years ago and have no desire to find a new one, so no. (Church weddings meant something different in the Mormon faith too, which also makes this complicated to answer).

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? When I was 9 or so, I went skinny dipping in my cousin’s backyard pond. It was slimy. I now live in a nudist capital and have been seriously toying with the idea of finding me a nudist beach some afternoon this summer. (It’s really cold right now).

39. Do you have any scars? Many. I’ve had at least 10 different surgeries over the years and have scars over my knees, shoulder blades, hips and finger. I also have a chicken pox scar on my cheek and a half moon scar on my thumb when a glass smashed when doing dishes. 

49. Are you an innie or an outie? Innie!

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? I suck for about 3 minutes and then bite. Ain’t nobody got time for that. 

69. Extrovert or Introvert? I’m more of an ambivert. I like being around people, but I also exist nicely by myself. I also have some social anxiety/self-esteem issues that make me appear and behave much more introverted than I actually am. 

79. Who was your first real crush? Uhh, third grade, Terrill Clouse. He was a year older than me and his mom was my piano teacher. I thought he was dreamy. I nursed massive crushes during high school/college/med school that never went any where (not on Terrill - I moved away a year later and only saw him a couple of times after that).

89. Do you like your age? I am trying to deal with it. I don’t feel as old as I am (except for my back which is falling apart), and it’s this bizarre feeling of failure for being my age and not having the marriage and family that I always thought I would. 

90. What makes you angry? A lack of compassion and empathy to others. Willful ignorance. Conspiracy theorists whose views get spread as if there were truth to them. 

91. Do you like your own name? I do! I don’t know that I necessarily look like a Julia, but it’s become my name. I can’t imagine answering to another. 

92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they? See the answer below. I did always like the name Cecily though.

93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child? Neither. I made peace a long time ago about my childless state. 

94. What are your strengths? Kind, patient, willing to listen, intelligent, speaks my own mind

95. What are your weaknesses? Too trusting at times, physical weakness, anxiety issues

96. How did you get your name? Julia was a fairly popular name in the 1970/80s. My middle name is a family name as it was my grandma’s middle name. 

97. Were your ancestors royalty? I’m pretty sure that one relative has tried to trace the lineage back to Adam and Eve, but as far as I know, no. 

98. Do you have any scars? I just answered this?? I have emotional scars from years-long unrequited crushes, which means that I’ve basically not dated/found anybody dateable or attractive for the last 10 years….

99. Color of your bedspread? I have a purple and yellow quilt that my grandma did the embroidery for before the dementia took over. My mom finished quilting it. 

100. Color of your room? I rent my house. So, boring white. 

[ethereal-pluto-blog]

I feel like shit today

I'm lethargic, slow, crying, and insecure. So yep ~depression~ has come to rear its ugly head once again.

But since I'm not into the whole anti-recovery thing, I'll give you some useful tips on how to maybe help YOUR depression that doesn't seem like a generic twitter self help thread. (Though I'll mention some things I found helpful and give explainations as to why.)

Talk to your therapist/counselor/mental health expert if available. Not everyone has the luxury of seeking professional help, but if you have the opportunity, PLEASE go to a professional. However be noted that it's often an experience to go through many different experts to find the one that matches your specific needs/ you like the most. Also keep in mind there are also online therapists ready to help if you're not big on one-on-one contact like myself, though often insurance is tricky. I put this one first because it might be the most beneficial for some, though not readily available for others.

If you have the strength, shower. Showering/cleaning yourself is a blessing in itself as it gives you a sense of detox. Though if you don’t have the strength or motivation, try some of this instead-

Utilize facewash and lotion. Particularly facewash that makes your face feel all chill and tingly, it makes you feel more refreshed. Lotions and cream will help you keep skin smooth.

Simply get wet with water, a quick 5 minute rinse in hot water is less of a chore than a full shower.

Dry shampoo will help with hair oiliness. Though if you don't have access just brush your hair and pull it/part it so it's out of your face.

Baby wipes. Baby wipes will cure yo soul. But seriously use baby wipes and rub them on your face, underarms, and genitals. A good rub down will help prevent you from feeling gross.

Splashing your face with cold water, it makes your pores tighten up and as a bonus it'll wake you up.

Utilize deodorant and vaseline. I haven't tried it out for myself, though if you put down deodorant and then vaseline on top it should trap the nice fragrant smell. And while you're at it you can put on cologne / perfume if you think you're getting a lil ripe, but if you want to smell like a fresh shower use ones that are labeled "shower fresh" or "baby powder."

If your lips are chapped, put on some balm shisters. (I don't trust the brand chapstick, I'm a conspiracy theorist okay I'm soRRy)

Change into some cleaner clothes. They don't have to be normal everyday clothes but at least change into new clothes, especially underwear.

Clean your fingernails/toenails. Clean under them, since random junk can get stuck up in there. Also clip them if they're too long for your liking.

Brush your teeth. But if you can't, use mints, gum, mouthwash, mouthspray, etc, or a combination of those. Anything minty will make your mouth tingle and feel fresh and clean.

Clean yo ears! Since probably nobody uses an ear vacuum (like you're supposedly supposed to idk I'm too broke for that shit anyways) just be careful using Q-tips.

If you don’t have any deodorant, try hand sanitizer! I'm not kidding. Put a dollop under each underarm, and let dry. Smells are caused by bacteria, so if you get hand sanitizer, it should greatly reduce smell.

Try to get some sun. Using the natural sunlight will help you absorb vitamin D. So open up the blinds and photosynthesize binches. Though it also helps to open up the window if you can, a breeze/fresh air blowing in with the smell of outside might even raise your mood. Though if it's currently shitty weather outside, try turning on your lights to match your circadian rhythm, so keep lights on during the day and dim it at night so it'll help with letting you be on a decent sleep schedule.

Feeling like there's no hope or that your future is going to be shit? Highkey me too, but here's what I do to combat that feeling.

It's corny, but I write a whole idealized future for myself. I write about my dream job, I write about my dream s/o, I even imagine the type of house I want to live in, the kids I'll have, what kind of pets I want to own. Etc. Although the economy is shit and no future is guaranteed, it's nice to put some positivity into light and show what I really want in life. I don't want to be some millionaire, I just want to be comfortably well off with a family and people that love me. And in all honesty a future like that isn't hard to obtain.

Even if you can't imagine a good future for yourself, imagine being a part of your friends or loved one's futures. For example, you know your friend who's dating this really cute person that you totally ship them with? Imagine being a part of the bridesmaids/groomsmen for their wedding when they tie the knot! Imagine your really smart friend finally graduating from college and you're at their graduation party giving them a speech! For me this really helps since I aspire to be drinking buddies with my best friend's future husband. (I'm rlly goofy ik lmao)

Feeling stressed about not doing anything? We've all been there. Try:

Doing work if you're due for assignments, though don't do it alone, if you can, arrange a group text/tutoring session/Skype call. If everyone is focused on getting something done then you'll be motivated to do it with them.

Though if you don’t absolutely have to do anything but want to do ~s o m e t h i n g~ I also got your back on this too.

Organize your inbox for your email. (Ik I'm lame)

Tidy/clean your room/any room if that gives you something to do.

Make your bed.

Cuddle someone/something.

Rearranging your stuff in your room, makes it feel like a whole remodel tbh.

Burn candles/incense. Don't ask just...trust me on this it can change the aura.

If you're religious, practice!

Take aesthetic photos of things in your room. Download VSCO and experiment with it. I also recommend Huji Cam and Afterlight. All are available for IOS and Android.

If you appreciate music- use YouTube and find some Playlists, or if you can, spotify premium will save yo mortal soul.

Like video games? Play some! Or if you're a brokeass like me, let's plays and walk throughs work well too.

If you got pets, pet them. Do it. Snuggle. Or if you love animals in general go and watch some vids on YouTube.

Build a fort.

If you're an artist or appreciate art- draw! Or you can watch animatics, animation memes, art channels, or follow artists on here or on Instagram and Twitter if you want to be inspired, or just observe.

Have a certain series you keep putting off? Watch! It! Netflix/Hulu that shit. Or cable TV works too.

Go on Wikipedia and just go on an adventure. Click from link to link and see where it takes you. Learn some weird new facts!

Read a new book.

Read the news/watch the news.

Write about a certain topic that you're absolutely fascinated about.

Watch movies!

Join a club/interest group. You can do this online too and it'll help meet people with similar interests as you. You can make new friends this way.

Give your friends a call/text. Having conversations will keep you occupied.

Self love aka masturbate. Or have (safe) sex with someone you trust!

Workout

Do some makeup/skincare routine. Even if you think you look bad just commit to practicing.

Sometimes it's just funny to go through and read some Reddit threads so be safe when surfing on there.

Stretch and move around! Dance if you wanna!

Do your hair/experiment in some new styles, maybe even dye it if you feel daring.

Have an icon you stan? Stan HARDER.

Watch iconic vine/rare vine compilations until you can memorize them.

Clean out your phone contacts of people that are irrelevant/toxic!! Out of sight out of mind! Don't hang on to them if they did you wrong. All the text conversations will just make you feel worse!

Actually cook your favorite food, cooking it will make you more dedicated to eating it and give you more of an appreciation for it.

Organize your closet.

Organize anything in your room/closet. Throw away things that you don't need or are too old to use.

Start collecting things, stuffed animals, pins, snowglobes, you name it.

Pinterest is addictive lowkey so try that if you're into that kind of stuff.

Write! Write a new story, write poetry, write about your feelings, write a letter, write fanfiction, express yourself.

Use Duolingo to try and study a new language to learn. (The owl will harass tf outta your email though but as long as you do like 5 minutes a day he won't bother.)

That's about all I can think of but feel free to add more for activities to dedicate your time to.

If you need to, because of your self image, don't go and stand in front of mirrors. If I stand in front of a mirror too long I'll end up scrutinizing myself and find a flaw after flaw. If you are specifically insecure about something with your body, look up models who have the same thing! Like if you're insecure about having vitiligo, look up Winnie Harlow! She's gorgeous! If you're insecure about being chubby, look up plus sized models! If you have a tooth gap, there's plenty of people like you! You don't have to feel ugly because of that when you have these awesome models rocking what they got.

Vent. You can vent to your friends, family, or even online. There are apps that allow you to vent anonymously to others without the fear of judgement. But if you can't do that, take a pen/pencil and write something down in your notebook. Though don't reread it to keep drowning in the negativity, once you write it, shut it. You can do the same on Google Docs online, once you write down everything, delete it. Don't keep trying to fuel your negative thoughts and bitterness, get your rant over with and be done. It's like a fresh start. (Plus on my Instagram spam account I always feel really silly looking at my old rant posts, so I usually delete stuff afterwards when I'm not feeling so in my feelings).

Don't expect recovery to be in a straight line. You'll have amazing days and also have extremely shitty days. Recovery isn't hoping to never experience shitty days, recovery is being able to feel the strength on those shitty days and know that they'll pass, and with each storm you'll be stronger than before. Don't push yourself to be flawless, because shit happens. But you'll make it through. And that's what matters.

And last but not least, seek emergency help if you feel like you're dangerously close to ending your life due to pain. Call the suicide hotline for support, because the pain can ease soon if you ask for the help that you need and deserve.

Not everyone that reads this is going to be like "wow this really helped me cope with my depression/mental illness!" But my goal was to at least try. It may not work for everyone unfortunately, but I hope that anyone dealing with a mental illness is on the road to recovering. Because I know how it feels. It feels sucky as fuck. But if this helps even just one person, then that's enough. I hope everyone has at least a decent day, and I hope that everyone's pain eases soon.