#but i saw the 94 movie directly after reading the book but before reading the rest of the series

[monstersinthecosmos]

I have no intention of watching the new IWTV show, but I was wondering why you think Armand's characterization was so bad. I kinda hated how Antonio Banderas played him in the 1994 movie (not on its own, just in comparison to the books - I feel like his personality/demeanor was totally different), so it's sad that they still haven't gotten him right... Judging from pictures alone, I did think the casting for him was more fitting this time. Anyway, just curious to hear your thoughts!

Oh man!!!!!!!!! I do wanna say up front, I think Antonio was NOT A GREAT ARMAND but I like those scenes in the movie so much because they feel SO RICEY to me. Like I LOVE Movie!Armand even though he isn't Book!Armand, and if you read IWTV in good faith it's the only book that doens't harp on Armand looking like a smol uwu cherub so like ! SURE. He definitely still brings the calm nurturing mentor vibe in a huge way and the scenes in his room feel the most like the books to me.

I also know from the director's commentary that they specifically wanted Armand to look like that so that the Europe vampires would feel like OLD WORLD SCARY vs like, another twink lol. So he's got a little more of a tropey Dracula vibe going on and I think like as a visual contrast it works really well.

As far as the show; I think Assad is EXCELLENT. And like the whole fandom was joking even when the credits hit IMDB that it was gonna be Armand because everyone was like "OHH ARRIGHT.. LOUIS'S """""ASSISTANT"""""" OKAY !" so like I was one of the conspiracy theorists looking for clues the whole time. And his MANNERISMS are dead on and gave him away before anything else did. I have zero issue with the actor, I think he's so spooky and a complete smokeshow which Armand DESERVES. And I wish I could like the show for him, I really do! But it's just NOT WORKING FOR ME.

I'll put the rest under a cut cause it got lengthy and I'm not trying to like be a downer on anyone's dashboard but TLDR the show is so completely unrecognizable to me and I think it would've been so much better as an original concept, and personally I'm not excited by randos who share names with the books I read. The show is a hit! People really like it! But idk like showing me these two random ass men and saying "Hey this is Daniel and Armand" doesn't excite me because the story they're showing me actually ISNT Daniel and Armand lol. I'm here for the story!!! I'm not here for Easter Eggs!

Here's my main few gripes with how they wrote Armand which I find mega disappointing:

He spends 6.9/7 episodes pretending to be Louis's assistant named Rashid. WHY! LOL. Why would he do that! DANIEL DOESN'T REMEMBER HIM ANYWAY SO WHY???????? I DONT UNDERSTAND. Like Armand is a weirdo but is he THIS WEIRD? idk. idk.

The show also (in my opinion!) horrifically botched Lestat, but there's like this grain of doubt because the show has a theme of memory being unreliable, so the speculation is that maybe Armand planted a skewed version of events in Louis's head? Even the show runner sort of hinted at this? LIKE I HATE THIS?? Because if we get to S2 and it turns out that Lestat's been misrepresented, it then turns the tables and makes it that ARMAND is the one who's horrifically botched????? Like I'm all for silly Armand jokes and memes and whatever but like. sigh idk i just looked really forward to this show and hoped to see Armand on screen and I didn't really want a meme version of him. ((Also as an aside I really dislike the unreliable memory themes on the show the way they're presented because like the books frame unreliable narration as like interpretive and emotional but the vampire lore canonically is that they have like mega supernatural photographic memory? idk. If memory is faulty because they still have that human fallibility it's one thing unless they're saying Armand planted memories in Louis's head??? idk idk.))

And like speaking towards whether or not Armand is a person who would plant false memories in Louis's head; I concede that he psychically influenced Louis to join him in IWTV but like. ARMAND IS A NUANCED CHARACTER WHO ACTS FROM A PLACE OF NEED AND HURT. And idk it's just so fucking clunky I can't imagine the manipulation taking this type of shape. There's just, to me LOL, a huge difference between the mental nudge of "You are lonely and you need guidance please come with me" and "Lestat was a horrific domestic abuser." And like. idk. Just within the package of the whole rest of the season, this team has the subtlety of dropping a fucking piano so I just have no trust in them to write him with any sense of nuance.

AND THE BIGGEST OFFENSE THAT I'M JUST COMPLETELY DISGUSTED BY IS THAT HE'S A DAYWALKER?????????????????????????????????????????????????

I just hate the daywalking shit so fucking much I can't even start. Like the show changes a lot of the lore which is fine whatever it's their show change lore if you feel like it whatever but like. ARMAND'S ENTIRE LIFE IS THEMATICALLY BOOKENDED BY DARKNESS. He grows up in a CAVE. He lives in a CULT BENEATH A CEMETARY. He tries to KILL HIMSELF by GOING INTO THE SUN.

Like. And he's only 500? That's like adolescent for a vampire LOL.

There were a couple times in the season where they had some continuity errors on the show!lore so I got the vibe that the writers didn't really care about all the VAMPIRE STUFF which is kinda disappointing to me bc I'm a nerd lol but it felt like they used Armand in the sun to just give the audience a red herring and it came across as really cheap to me. So I wouldn't put it past this team to kinda be like DAYWALKING SURE LOL and not really take it seriously or think about the larger picture of how that unfolds for the character over more seasons.

IT'S WHATEVER, I JUST. I know it wouldn't make good television but I like VC because it's like existential dread and consuming darkness, I want it to hurt me, I want it to feel bleak, I want Armand's entire arc to be about how much he struggles with the idea that there's no God. It just feels like if you can make it a few centuries and be able to withstand the sun, what's the fucking point? What sacrifice did you make for being immortal? Especially for a character like Armand who so fully believes himself to be damned and would never want to make another vampire, would never subject even an enemy to it.

Especially bc like in the show the vampires can like ? Smoke? And have sex? And they can eat food (even though it tastes like paste but they can eat food). IF YOU CAN SMOKE AND FUCK AND GO IN THE SUN YOU'RE JUST A GUY. Where's the fucking DAMNATION OF IT ALL? Also what's the fucking point of Those Who Must Be Kept if you can go in the sun lol. I just . Ugh what a clusterfuck.

The show turns vampirism into more of a power fantasy than the way the books treat it as damnation or a symbol of being othered so it doesn't really mesh with like, my idea of VC and what I want out of it.

So Armand being a daywalker = Instant Nope From Me. I'm not interested in whatever they're trying to sell me lol.

A few other things that are NOT confirmed but generally just giving me the ick that I worry about:

I really, really, deeply, truly, hated how they wrote Claudia's character and how they wrote about rape, and that gives me a really bad feeling about how they'd potentially tackle Armand's canon background. The two options are: They don't, and he's a completely different character with a different background, with completely different context for his personality/motivations/etc (in which case who the fuck cares he's just some guy who shares a name with the book I like, and not really Armand), or: They GO THERE and it's just extremely heavy handed and insensitive and not fun to watch. I think show!Claudia maybe has more in common with Armand than book!Claudia because they aged her up to be a teenager so it's just, yikes. THEN AGAIN ARMAND IS NO LONGER A TEENAGER ON THE SHOW?

And to that point like. I don't need a bunch of fucking conservatives getting in my face about how I want to see a teenager sexualized because that's not the point; logistically for TV it makes sense that he's older, but again, it changes his backstory so much. imho, Armand being turned as a teenager and looking like a teenager is a huge element of his character! It's important! It just is! And I'm sorry that the show decided that the vampires could have sex, because they invented this problem for themselves! If they kept the canon lore you wouldn't have to see them have sex anyway LOL.

I also was not a fan of the truncated timeline of the show; season 1 takes place in like 30 years I think? And covers from the beginning of the story until Lestat's murder. And I believe Louis will meet Armand in the 1940s; they have the original interview in the 70s and they're together then, and they're together in the present in 2022. Idk I'm just not impressed; humans can get divorced after 30 years too, what's the point of having immortal characters if you're not gonna stretch out the timeline? And so much happens for Armand and Louis in canon and I have no idea what's happened or not happened on the show yet, no one's really sure which events have happened yet in the present day segments of the show. So like idk there's just a lot of Armand/Louis stuff to be smushing into 70 years lol and I'm bummed that they're rushing through the timeline so much.

So I just. Sigh. There's a lot of themes in VC that I really adore that the show doesn't care about, like being VERY OLD and NEVER SEEING THE SUN AGAIN but. I'm in the minority on this one because people love the show LOL. I'm happy for everyone who likes it, but it's not for me.

And like. Just! I knew going in that it would be the Loustat Show, I think everyone knew that, I didn't have huge expectations for Armand/Daniel content but it's such a small part of the books that like it would've been nice to get a couple scenes or some gifs out of it or whatever. It just sucks that like they SET UP the series in a way that the Devil's Minion won't happen on screen. And it sucks that like, depending how long the show runs for or how long AMC retains the rights, this might be the only chance in my lifetime that I had to see Devil's Minion on screen and it's not going to happen.

It's just a bummer man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sorry to anyone who likes the show lol I just found it to be like mega disappointing and I don't think I'm going to watch S2, I'm too upset about Armand & Daniel LOL.

[exotic-dreamuses]

Do you guys do requests?? If so then can you guys write a Drabble where Chanyeol finds Baekhyun crying because of kids bullying him at school??

Here you go!! This is something new, I hope I didn’t disappoint!!

Requests are closed!!

                                     ========================

“So I was thinking,” Chanyeol leaned along the wall of lockers, his hands on his backpack straps as Baekhyun put his own combination in. “Maybe I could pick you up after practice, and we could go out tonight? We can go see a movie or do dinner, or something.”

Baekhyun hummed, pulling his locker open and slipping his math book inside. “I need to work on my biology report, I didn’t get much done last night.”

“Okay, well do you at least want to come over and work on it? I promise I won’t distract you.”

“We both know that’s a lie.” Baekhyun knelt down to pick up a piece of paper which had fluttered out of his locker.

“What’s that?”

“Nothing.” Baekhyun shoved it in his backpack, along with his history journal and his English novel. “Probably Jongdae or Sehun, I’ll read it later.”

Baekhyun knew it wasn’t. He didn’t need to open the note and see the perfect cursive to know that it was Bae Joohyun, head cheerleader and destroyer of Baekhyun’s life.

Ever since he and Chanyeol had gotten together, he’d received notes and threats demanding he break up with Chanyeol, since apparently Joohyun had a thing for Chanyeol and wanted him to herself.

“I’m head cheerleader, he’s the quarterback.” Joohyun had said to him once, catching casually just before he walked into his classroom. “It’s only right that we become the ultimate item. You’re just in the way.”

She had somehow convinced herself that Chanyeol wasn’t actually gay, that it was just a phase, and soon he would realize his undying love for her and dump Baekhyun, just like that.

“Okay. Well, just think about tonight. I’ll text you when I’m out, and you can let me know what you want to do.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Baekhyun smiled up at Chanyeol, shutting his locker. The bell rang, and Chanyeol cursed, since his next class was on the other side of the building.

“Love you.” He pecked Baekhyun’s lips quickly before jogging down the hallway.

Baekhyun smiled at his boyfriend’s retreating figure before ducking into his history class, ready to deal with Professor Jang’s lecture on the American Civil War.

Once inside, Baekhyun pulled out his notebook and pencil bag after taking his usual seat on the side, next to Jongdae. The note fell out, and Baekhyun, though he knew he shouldn’t, opened it.

You’re so ugly. Just wait, Chanyeol will get bored of you soon enough.

Baekhyun rolled his eyes. “Ugly?” Like he hadn’t heard that one before. He folded the note back up and slipped it under the cover of his journal, refusing to look at it for the rest of class. After class was over, Baekhyun passed Joohyun and her cheerleader friends standing by her locker.

“Find a better insult.” He remarked.

“Find a better face.” Joohyun shot back, her friends all laughing at her comment.

“Just ignore them.” Jongdae grabbed Baekhyun’s shoulder and pulled him away, shooting the girls a dirty look of his own. “They’re just jealous because your eyeliner always looks so much better.”

“You’re probably right.” Baekhyun sighed. He was just so tired. Tired of ignoring, tired of fighting, tired of constantly having to defend his relationship with Chanyeol to the rest of the school. It wasn’t their business, anyway.

                                      ========================

His last few classes passed uneventfully, just like they usually did. Baekhyun stayed behind for a few minutes, discussing the homework with Professor Kim before leaving. He didn’t realize how much time had passed while he’d been inside, the halls were practically empty by the time he got out.

Baekhyun made his way to the bathroom, planning on relieving himself and then heading home. He checked his phone and saw one text from Chanyeol.

I’m heading to practice. Don’t forget about tonight! I’ll text you when I’m out, love you!

Baekhyun smiled, shooting him a reply as he shoved the door to the boys’ bathroom open.

He dumped his stuff on the floor by the door, but before he could head for one of the urinals, the door slammed open and Joohyun walked in, flanked by her friends Sooyoung and Seulgi.

Baekhyun took a step back, his eyes wide. “You can’t be in here.”

“Who’s going to stop me? You?” Joohyun sneered, smirking. Her friends laughed, a light, carefree sound echoing through the tiled bathroom. Baekhyun hated it.

“What do you want.” Baekhyun cut to the point. He just wanted to be yelled at so that he could get it over with and go home.

“What I always want.” Joohyun sang. “Break up with Chanyeol.”

“Why do you still try so hard?” Baekhyun sighed, crossing his arms. “It’s not going to happen. Chanyeol’s gay, sweetheart. And I am too. Shocking, I know. And do you know what that means?” Baekhyun took a step towards her, looking down on the small cheer captain. “He. Doesn’t. Like. Girls. Like you. Get over yourself, you have no chance.”

Baekhyun didn’t even register the hit, but suddenly he was facing the wall, and his left cheek was on fire. Baekhyun lifted his hand up and pulled it away, looking at it in shock. He was bleeding.

“Where do you get the nerve to talk to me like that?” Joohyun hissed, taking a step towards Baekhyun. He took a step back, running straight into the wall. “Chanyeol doesn’t deserve you. He deserves so much better.” She was seething, her perfectly manicured nails coming up and gripping painfully into his arm. “You’re pathetic. It’s too bad you can’t see it yourself, you’d make this so much easier if you did.”

She stepped back, wiping her hand on her skirt as though merely touching Baekhyun was disgusting. “If you don’t, this is all about to get so much worse. So get ready, Byun.” She leaned in and whispered directly in his ear, her breath ghosting over his skin. “I will make your life a living hell. Don’t test me.”

“Consider yourself tested.” Baekhyun managed around the lump in his throat.

Joohyun flipped him off and stormed out of the bathroom, her friends following and slamming the door behind them. There was silence.

“Oh god.” Baekhyun leaned against the wall, his hand cradling his injured cheek. “Oh, what did I just do?”

Baekhyun knew it was over for him. He hadn’t been scared from the notes, or from Joohyun’s backhand insults. But now, now he was terrified.

He had called for Joohyun’s full wrath now, she was going to crack down on him. But it wasn’t just her, it was everyone. The whole school would be on her side. The other cheerleaders, most of the football team probably.

Baekhyun was doomed.

He took a deep breath to calm himself before grabbing his backpack and walking out the door. He shakily walked out to the student parking lot where his car was, parked next to Chanyeol’s jeep in their usual spots. Baekhyun found himself turning around every few steps, already paranoid that someone was out to get him, that he was going to be attacked at any second.

Eventually he made it outside, making a beeline for his car which was one of the only ones left in the lot. He could see the football team in the practice fields, running drills with the coaches’ voices and sharp whistles carrying through the air.

Somehow, Baekhyun was able to spot numbers 61, 94, and 88. Chanyeol, Sehun, and Jongin, all standing on the edge of the field together, their helmets off and guzzling water from the bottles offered by the athletic trainers.

Baekhyun turned away and entered his car, tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. Oh, what was Chanyeol going to say?

Somehow Baekhyun made it home without wrecking, he’d barely seen the road as he tried holding back his tears.

He didn’t acknowledge his mom when she called a greeting to him, running up the stairs and slamming his bedroom door, locking it. He slid down the door, his legs finally giving out as he started crying.

“Baekhyun?” His mom knocked on his door softly. “Honey, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Baekhyun called back, wincing when his voice cracked. It always cracked when he cried, so he knew that she knew that he was upset.

“Baekhyun, sweetie, open the door.” She said, knocking again.

Baekhyun ignored her, instead burying his face in his palms as he tried to stop crying. He didn’t want her hearing him so upset, he didn’t want to be so upset, but he couldn’t help it. It was like everything he’d been through the past few months built up behind a dam, and there was a crack in the bathroom, and now it was overflowing, pulsing, pushing to be let out and wreak havoc in Baekhyun’s life.

His mom left after a few minutes, and Baekhyun was able to push himself up off the door and stumble over to a far corner of his room so that he was hidden from the door behind his desk. He curled up in a ball, burying his face in the crook of his elbow and continued crying.

He was still wearing Chanyeol’s sweatshirt, and the sentiment was somehow comforting like he could pretend Chanyeol was there with him, making him feel better, even though the truth was that the tall football captain had no idea what was going on between his boyfriend and the cheer captain. Oh, and the rest of the school. You can’t forget the rest of the school.

There was another knock on his door a while later, Baekhyun had no idea how much later, and he thought about yelling at his mom to go away when his boyfriend’s voice came through the door.

“Baekhyun?” He called softly, and Baekhyun quieted down. “Baek, let me in.”

Baekhyun bit his lip and buried his mouth in Chanyeol’s sweatshirt, trying to muffle his heavy breaths.

“Please, baby, please let me in,” Chanyeol begged. Baekhyun stayed silent.

He could hear Chanyeol murmuring to who Baekhyun assumed to be his mom on the other side of the door. A second later the doorknob was jiggling, and he heard a click before the door was pushed open.

“Baek?” Chanyeol stepped slowly across the threshold into Baekhyun’s room, his eyes searching the room for his small, distressed boyfriend.

Baekhyun shifted his weight, trying to curl himself tighter in the corner but Chanyeol picked up on the movement, his head turning to see Baekhyun hiding behind his desk.

“Oh, Baekhyun.” Chanyeol crossed the room in two strides, kneeling down in front of Baekhyun and resting his hand gently on his cheek. “What’s wrong? And your cheek…”

“Nothing,” Baekhyun said, though the tears running down his face and his labored breathing said otherwise. Chanyeol scooped Baekhyun up in his arms easily, carrying the smaller over to his bed and sitting down against the headboard, Baekhyun cradled in his lap.

Chanyeol began running his hand through Baekhyun’s hair as the smaller shifted so his legs were on either side of Chanyeol’s hips and he was laying completely on the taller’s chest, his hands fisting in Chanyeol’s shirt. Chanyeol wrapped an arm protectively around Baekhyun’s waist and he held him close, his lips pressed lightly against his forehead.

“Baek, what happened?” He asked cautiously, his hand still running through his hair.

Baekhyun simply shook his head and tightened his grip on the captain’s shirt.

“Baby, please, tell me what happened,” Chanyeol asked again. “I can’t stand seeing you like this and not doing anything about it.”

“There’s nothing you can do,” Baekhyun whispered, voice muffled as half his face was flush against Chanyeol’s shirt.

“You don’t know that—”

“I do.” Baekhyun cut him off. “It’s not you they hate, it’s me.”

“What do you mean, ‘they hate’ you? Who are ‘they’?” Chanyeol responded, his eyebrows furrowing. “Baekhyun, what’s going on?”

“It’s just…everyone. Everything. It’s all too much, Chanyeol, and I can’t do it anymore. I can’t handle it, I can’t—” Baekhyun started crying again, and Chanyeol’s hands wrapped around his back and he rocked his crying boyfriend gently, whispering sweetly in his ear until he calmed back down.

“It’s Joohyun.” Baekhyun finally said once he could talk again. “Well, it’s everyone, really. But it’s mostly Joohyun.”

“What about her?” Chanyeol was so confused. How did Joohyun even know Baekhyun?

“She thinks—she thinks you’re too good for me. That you deserve better, and that I should break up with you so you can start dating her.” Baekhyun broke off as sobs took over again, Chanyeol holding him so tightly he was worried he’d break him, though he couldn’t stop.

“That’s not true, Baek, you know that. I love you, not her. I’d never leave you for her, baby.” Chanyeol whispered, his head bent so his lips were barely brushing Baekhyun’s ear as he spoke.

“No, I know that, I do.” Baekhyun took a deep breath. “It’s just…I’m so tired, Chanyeol. I don’t know what else to do. They won’t stop, and I stopped reacting to them weeks ago.”

“How long has this been going on?”

“Oh, uh, I don’t know.” Baekhyun screwed his eyes shut.

“Baekhyun.”

“Two months.” He whispered. He felt Chanyeol take a deep breath, the feeling reverberating through his own chest.

“Baekhyun, you have to tell me these things.” Chanyeol sighed, his arms still holding Baekhyun tight to his chest. “I can’t help you if you don’t even tell me that there’s a problem.”

“It’s not your problem to deal with, though,” Baekhyun remarked. “It’s me they hate, you’re in the clear.”

“I’m not in the clear as long as you aren’t in the clear. We’re dating, we’re in this together. Always. I’m here for you, Baek. You know that.”

Baekhyun nodded weakly. “I know.”

Chanyeol pressed a light kiss to Baekhyun’s forehead and somehow was able to reach the blanket at the end of the bed, pulling it up over the two boys who were still tangled up together. “Go to sleep now, baby. We’ll talk more in the morning, we’ll figure something out.”

Baekhyun nodded again, shifting his legs so they were intertwined with Chanyeol’s instead of on either side of his hips. Chanyeol shifted down so that he wasn’t against the headboard anymore, he was laying with his head on Baekhyun’s pillow while Baekhyun had his head on Chanyeol’s chest.

Baekhyun figured his boyfriend was still exhausted from football practice with how quickly he fell asleep. Baekhyun, on the other hand, was up for a while longer. He was awake when his mom poked her head back into his room, looking relieved when she saw the couple curled up together in the bed.

His mom made her way over when she noticed that Baekhyun’s eyes were still open, though half-lidded with drowsiness, and she leaned over to press a light kiss to both Baekhyun and Chanyeol’s heads.

“I love you.” She whispered in Baekhyun’s ear, quietly so as not to wake her son’s sleeping boyfriend, but loud enough that Baekhyun heard it clearly. He shot his mom a grateful smile as she turned and walked back out of the room, shutting the door quietly.

Baekhyun shifted his head a bit to find the most comfortable position and Chanyeol groaned in his sleep, tightening his hold on Baekhyun automatically. Baekhyun smiled, his eyes shutting as he joined his boyfriend in sleep.

                                      ========================

Chanyeol and Baekhyun hadn’t spoken much the next morning, in fact, Chanyeol had been gone by the time Baekhyun woke up. Baekhyun had asked his mom if she’d seen him, to which she replied that Chanyeol had snuck out early, passing by the kitchen only when Baekhyun’s mom had insisted he grab something for breakfast.

Upon arriving at school, Baekhyun was surprised to not pass Joohyun or any of her friends in the hallway. He kept looking over his shoulders uneasily, jumping when Chanyeol snuck up behind him and wrapped his arms around his waist.

“Chanyeol! You cannot sneak up on me like that, oh my god.” Baekhyun’s hand came to rest over his rapidly beating heart as Chanyeol laughed and pressed a light kiss to Baekhyun’s cheek before leaning against the lockers next to his.

“Are you feeling any better?” Chanyeol asked, all traces of playfulness disappearing from his face.

Baekhyun hummed. “I would’ve been better if I’d woken up with my boyfriend. Where did you go this morning?”

“I had something to take care of. Oh, Hi Joohyun!” Chanyeol called, waving at the cheerleader with a bright smile as she shot him something between a scowl and a grimace, nodding her head politely while she walked past the pair.

“Park. Chanyeol.” Baekhyun slammed his locker shut and turned to glare at his tall boyfriend. “What did you do?”

“Nothing too horrible!” Baekhyun shot him an unamused look, and Chanyeol sighed, looking down at the ground. “I just said that if she or any of her friends threatened you I’d make Sehun leak their nudes. He has them saved from literally the entire cheer team.”

Baekhyun gasped. “Oh my god, you can’t say that! You’re going to get in trouble.”

“Oh please. It’s Joohyun we’re talking about here. She won’t go to anyone about this, she sends them out herself. But, if other people send them out for her, that’s her deal breaker. So, it all works out.”

“What, she stops messing with me?”

“And she can continue to slut it up in her own time, by her preference, of course.”

“Oh my god. You’re insane.” Baekhyun shook his head and began walking towards his math room.

“I’m insane, and you love me.” Chanyeol corrected him, taking his hand and squeezing his fingers as they both walked towards the math wing of the building.

“I guess you’re not really wrong.” Baekhyun conceded with a smile.

“I’ll see you later, after practice? Okay?” Chanyeol asked once they got outside Baekhyun’s classroom.

“Yeah.” Baekhyun nodded with a smile. “I’ll see you then.”

“Wait!” Chanyeol grabbed Baekhyun before he could walk into his room, pulling him into a kiss far too rough to be doing in a school hallway.

Baekhyun pulled back a second later, blushing beyond belief as he hid his face in Chanyeol’s chest.

“What was that for?” He groaned.

“Joohyun just walked by. Well that, and I love you, of course.” Chanyeol pecked the top of Baekhyun’s head again before standing him up and pushing him towards the classroom door. “Have a good class, learn a lot, pay attention!”

“You’re insane!” Baekhyun called, laughing as Chanyeol began backing down the hallway, still calling instructions for him to follow during his class.

“Yes, but you still love me!”

Baekhyun rolled his eyes and walked into class.

PSA I have nothing against Red Velvet (I love them my queens!!) I just needed someone to play the antagonist and honestly with Joohyun’s figure why wouldn’t I pick her a true goddess

Their school has the best football team and cheerleading squad lemme just wow

- Admin Em

REMINDER: REQUESTS ARE CLOSED!!!

[imeugene]

I just read this and it’s pretty interesting. The topic is out there and as much as crapstorm these things tend to be.. I lowkey like it. I’m not gonna weigh in about anything but I’ll just leave it at a story that I’ve been wanting to tell. Just never had an opportunity to do so and I think this is a way that I can and escape some responsibility. It’ll all make sense. 

The Bikeguide video. It was what I was supposed to do. Bikeguide was a forum for geeks of BMX. People who measured parts with calipers and discussed the hypotheticals of BMX. It was a great community like that. I can honestly say I have fond memories of that place growing up and really enjoyed being part of it when it was still lively. With the community it fostered there was a lot of debates between people. I’d say it was the more intelligent part of BMX forums. Vital was for kids. TCUB was for try hards. 20inchnyc was for... I don’t know what it was for and the BMXBOARD was for the exclusive members of there to jerk each other off and act like its a BMX Illuminati. Bikeguide was more friendly to everyone which made it in my opinion the best forum. Yea. People took a lot of high quality pictures of their bikes but it was all in good fun and taste. 

I wanted to travel and film a Bikeguide video. Not out of any type of real selfless motives but I’m Asian and my mom knows way too many kids of her friend’s who are making 100k plus and felt like I’m doing nothing. BMX has completely dominated my life at that point so I wasn’t doing anything she could understand. A Bikeguide video would seem official enough while simultaneously allowing me to the see more of the world I always wanted to do (also the same case with the only Atavism shirt I ever made and sold). Something if you read this blog enough you realize is a big part of BMX to me. Back then Bikeguide had a lively enough community to pull that off and I wanted to do it too. So I tried. I saved money and went out and filmed and traveled. They say traveling is life changing experience and it was.

I really wanted to make a Bikeguide video though. I had no plans to make it anything else. I guess I was a bit too young and naive to understand what I didn’t know would happen in the course of that four months so. I honestly came back from all that hating BMX. People acting all sorts of weird in years after, getting stolen from, played around, even a few fights, all that usual petty stuff that now I understand comes from just being a person but when it was all happening the usual moniker of a chink constantly came up. A kid who always had nothing but good experiences in BMX, I kind of grew to resent it. I rode bikes cause I didn’t wanna deal with all that which was pretty prevalent in my upbringing in Richmond, the former capitol of the Confederacy and BMX was becoming more like that. Sure I used to be pretty opinionated on Bikeguide. Have beliefs like I would on here on politics, religion and what not. It was nice cause under the anonymity of a username you truly felt like your opinions were valid because of their substance. I find a lot of times if people view you as different, especially as something as big as race than inherently they view you as bias. What person on Earth doesn’t have a race? I guess everyone is bias but that’s not how its perceived. I’m the different one and my beliefs are wrong cause I am.  

I remember meeting someone and that person knew who I was through Bikeguide and I didn’t know who that person was. Maybe a lurker, maybe a prominent member I don’t know. That person would subtly gesture that he knew me and my internet history. I guess I offended him enough online to the extent he remembered and subtly made it known that he didn’t like me. Honestly he probably didn’t like my views which at the time were strong, misguided but I’d say well intentioned like most early 20 year old. I think the clinger was the fact that me being Asian was the root of all my problems, the way he put it. Something that happened a bit too much. Coming back from that trip made me hate Bikeguide and the BMX community in general. Like I said young, naive, and still misguided, a few penis jokes and chinks online and offline, typical foreigner racist jokes and what nots. Later I’m done with BMX people. I just got to a point where BMX dictated my life and that may work for some people but I always hated the notion that I’m gonna be too Asian til I prove myself otherwise. Either I have to be white enough to be in the cool like back in high school but I wasn’t gonna do that. I hung out with the weirdos and degenerates, I didn’t do it then and I sure as hell aren’t gonna do it now. That or work myself extra, cause I better make myself useful. My anime loving ass isn’t gonna do anyone’s preciously choreographed social status any better so I have to directly offer them something for their A-ok. Nah I don’t function like that either. As much as I wanted to believe that BMX is separate from the real world, it’s not. It’s just easier for me to realize cause I don’t have luxury to pretend it’s not. Cause the same crap the governs the rest of the world, governs BMX too and that’s people. 

I ultimately didn’t make a Bikeguide video and I regret that a lot. I was an even more a pompous douche back then. I made Somewhere. I distinctly remember cause it’s the individuals that are all out there “somewhere” that made it all worth it. Gave out a few copies for free and put some sections through BMX UNION with Kurt. Kurt and everyone I met through Bikeguide directly were good people though and Kurt if your reading this my mom was ultimately proud to see what I wrote and put up through your site so ultimately my trip was a success. In hindsight 94% of people I met were good but there’s a way that the 6% shits on everything. I’m sure they have people they love and that love them but Hitler was also loved so that doesn’t mean much to me. I’m sure 94% of the time those people are decent people too just when they were in the presence of such greatness as myself, they couldn’t hold in their feelings of envy, jealousy, want, lust, and absolute desire to be my friend and maybe more.. and all that came out as anger. It’s ok I get it a lot ;* 

But back to topic in question, honestly I can’t take either argument seriously. One used the word proletariat in a serious way and the other guy called Washington DC “the edge of the South”. Proletariat?! Seriously!? That’s the verbal equivalent of I drive a small hatchback and have a bumper sticker for every view I have. And DC is not the edge of the South. DC is one of the most multicultural friendly areas in probably all the US. Ethiopian food is literally regional cuisine. There are supermarkets for every race and culture in every other corner. Driving home from work today in the 20 minutes I saw a Christian Church that had Black Lives Matter, another Christian Church that had a rainbow flag, a Buddhist temple for Chinese people, a Buddhist temple for Cambodians, Greek Orthodox church, a Mosque, and a half dozen Korean churches for every denomination. DC had a very sordid racist history I’ll admit but it’s changed drastically since then. 

The way I see the whole thing is something like this. My family has obviously never owned slaves but I don’t use the n-word. Am I tied into this system of hate? Nope. My family was picking rice somewhere thousands of miles away in the opposite direction. My race is completely uninvolved in the history that happened but I don’t use it cause it’s inconsiderate. Maybe if you’re one of my close buddies and we’ve been blasting rap music for a few hours and we’re extra hyped, I might use it as a term of endearment but never in a way of hate. I don’t make it a deal to use it or show everyone I can use it. I don’t want to justify myself in saying it’s a word and explaining why I’m not tied into all hate language if they ask. In the end I can just choose not and everyone goes their way and no one will ever make a fuss that I don’t use it. It’s just common courtesy. In 1000 years when people use the n-word as formal language they can do that but now.. it’s a heavy word that has meaning for everyone. Just cause someone like Tyler the Creator says he doesn’t care how anyone uses it, doesn’t mean it’s true for everyone. I’m not so full of myself to make it a point, do it and guess everyone’s outcome. Can you be proud of the South. Absolutely. Can you tell people who are also proud to be Southern. Absolutely. Should you make it a point and show everyone by placing something as symbolic and meaningful as a Confederate flag to everyone in a nationally advertised event in BMX. It’s bad taste. A Dale Earnhardt t-shirt would’ve sufficed. Sure BMX loves bad taste but this is a realm that is really meaningful to a lot of people and BMX is not the type of vessel for that level of a message. 

I wrote a few things before that I felt was important. Things tinged in a bit of a social message. I did it cause this site is a way I have the most audience. At the time I probably had a few hundred views a month. The messages I put I felt were important cause they were messages I lacked growing up. No one writes songs about what it is to be Asian in America. Or makes movies or anything really. Outside of books, it’s just not there but I made a conscious decision to stay away from that cause this is a BMX blog and once again BMX is not the vessel for that level of message. After this post, back to the usual. Cause honestly you folks aren’t even capable of handling the message I really want to deal out muhahaha. 

[oldeststoryintheuniverse]

1-100 XD

1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? Spotify!2. is your room messy or clean?It depends on my current attitude tbh3. what color are your eyes?they sort of change.4. do you like your name? why?i’m kind of indifferent at this point. i’ve never really felt like it fit me well.5. what is your relationship status?single af6. describe your personality in 3 words or lesscaring, determined, passionate7. what color hair do you have?auburn8. what kind of car do you drive? color?Yellow VW Beetle9. where do you shop?all over the place. i do a lot of shopping.10. how would you describe your style?as cute as possible always.11. favorite social media accountinstagram.12. what size bed do you have?a queen13. any siblings?technically i have one half sister.14. if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?right where i am. or disneyland. i have a passion for the company and i feel like i have to be contributing to its future.15. favorite snapchat filter?the bat one! when it’s available which is not as often as it should be16. favorite makeup brand(s)i only use kat von d for my foundation and beyond that…i could be flexible.17. how many times a week do you shower?at least 7 because anything less is NASTY. showering daily is extremely important for personal hygene.18. favorite tv show?doctor who but not the newest stuff.19. shoe size?6.520. how tall are you?5′4″21. sandals or sneakers?boots.22. do you go to the gym?i wish i did…i should…23. describe your dream dateHave you heard the song, “Meet Me Down on Mainstreet?” that. plus a parade and then cuddling eventually.24. how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?like $15 i think25. what color socks are you wearing?i’m not currently wearing socks26. how many pillows do you sleep with?1-227. do you have a job? what do you do?i’m a character attendant at WDW28. how many friends do you have?why on earth would i know a number?29. whats the worst thing you have ever done?That is a very good question…honestly i think it’s being low key salty behind someone’s back when it didn’t even hurt them at all…but my bad attitude contributed to general negativity. at least, that’s what i can think of at the moment.30. whats your favorite candle scent?that christmassy apple/cinnamon scent.31. 3 favorite boy namesI sat here for ages and i have no idea32. 3 favorite girl namesAngelique, Evangeline, and….i dunno.33. favorite actor?i appreciate many people’s talents but i don’t know if i have a favorite.34. favorite actress?^^^^35. who is your celebrity crush?again…don’t really have one.Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? 36. Favorite movie?lots. alice in wonderland. other disney stuff. lord of the rings. zootopia. stuff37. do you read a lot? whats your favorite book?i don’t read as much as i used to. i wish i did. LOVE harry potter. and lots of other books. alice in wonderland. peter pan. stuff.38. money or brains?brains probably.39. do you have a nickname? what is it?a few. Alice, G, old ones that have kind of died out…40. how many times have you been to the hospital?a couple when i was younger. i can’t remember how many.41. top 10 favorite songsIt changes with my mood and how i’m feeling. I love love LOVE Dan Franklin’s music…I love Try Everything, and currently my favorite thing on the radio is 24 Karat Magic. i like almost all music. just not heavy screamo metal.42. do you take any medications daily?just for my allergies lol43. what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)i think kind of combination44. what is your biggest fear?not achieving my dream job because i have no idea what else i’d do with my life.45. how many kids do you want?no idea. that’s something to discuss with my future husband.46. whats your go to hair style?i usually either straighten it or curl it. if i’m feeling lazy, i don’t have time, or it’s really hot out, i do braided pigtails.47. what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)townhouse.48. who is your role model?myself, after a complicated relationship with a friend of mine and reflecting on the attitude of those around me. also judy hopps. i’m generally proud enough of my own ideals not to have to look to others. not that i never learn anything from other people, but i don’t think i have one role model. this answer sounded really self centered i apologize.49. what was the last compliment you received?when i was out at dinner a few people said i looked really pretty. and i appreciate them.50. what was the last text you sent?my friend said she was on her way over and i replied, “okie dokie.”51. how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?this question is bonkers, i literally worked with santa a couple weeks ago and he’s as real as I am.52. what is your dream car?i’d love something old and vintage but that’ll never run well…most newer cars i really don’t like. when mine dies i’m gonna get the final edition new beetle, hopefully.53. opinion on smoking?don’t do it. it’s destructive to you and those around you. 54. do you go to college?yep. almost done. thank goodness. 55. what is your dream job?i want to be best friends with disney characters and help them make magic for our guests. :)56. would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?probably the suburbs57. do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?YES I STEAL THEM ALL58. do you have freckles?yep. not my favorite thing but they are inescapable. 59. do you smile for pictures?of course!60. how many pictures do you have on your phone?a couple hundred, i think61. have you ever peed in the woods?honestly i can’t remember if i might’ve done it like once as a child, but if i did i literally can’t remember. 62. do you still watch cartoons?the word “cartoon” is ambiguous. for me it has kind of a negative connotation. but i do watch animated movies and tv and stuff, yes63. do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?wendy’s if i have to choose, although almost all fast food makes me feel sick.64. Favorite dipping sauce?ketchup or ranch. or that sweet and sour stuff from mcdonald’s but i never eat there anymore.65. what do you wear to bed?pjs.66. have you ever won a spelling bee?i’ve never even been in a spelling bee, but i’d probably lose.67. what are your hobbies?photography (i’m hoping to get to do that again soon…my muscles don’t like me), painting, stuff68. can you draw?i’m mediocre at best.69. do you play an instrument?i mostly remember how to play flute and piccolo from high school and i can do a little piano but not much.70. what was the last concert you saw?i honestly can’t remember. it’s been a really long time since i’ve been to a legitimate concert. i sat here for a while but could not remember.71. tea or coffee?tea!72. Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?that depends entirely on the item i’m purchasing73. do you want to get married?some day74. what is your crush’s first and last initial?n. e. for non-existent amirite75. are you going to change your last name when you get married?YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES76. what color looks best on you?blue, in my opinion77. do you miss anyone right now?always78. do you sleep with your door open or closed?usually closed.79. do you believe in ghosts?i don’t have enough evidence to make a decision80. what is your biggest pet peeve?i think working at disney has caused me to develop TOO MANY.81. last person you calledmy mother82. favorite ice cream flavor?chocolate!83. regular oreos or golden oreos?regular. but without the frosting.84. chocolate or rainbow sprinkles?neither i do not like sprinkles85. what shirt are you wearing?a sweatshirt i wear around the house from 2014 wdw86. what is your phone background?for the first time ever i changed my lock screen to a picture of just me, and my home screen is me and Lotso87. are you outgoing or shy?much more on the outgoing side88. do you like it when people play with your hair?yes please89. do you like your neighbors?i don’t really know my neighbors but i know i’m not fond of the ones directly across from me due to their recent choices in lawn decor.90. do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?yes both91. have you ever been high?nope92. have you ever been drunk?nope93. last thing you ate?hello panda94. favorite lyrics right now”So now I’m all run out of my regrets this time. I’ve got nothing left, I’ve got no more tears to cry. Baby turn around, and don’t come back this time. I need to start again, I’m only starting at the finish line.”95. summer or winter?winter96. day or night?night usually97. dark, milk, or white chocolate?milk!98. favorite month?october?99. what is your zodiac signlibra100. who was the last person you cried in front of?i got a little teary last night at work in front of eeyore. last time i cried before that was by myself…i don’t know the true answer to this question