#( his sister's words: you will meet nice people out there someday got to me )

[melpcmene-arch]

also, i need childhood friends au for sanji too--

[lokisprettygirl]

Under his influence (Post Avengers! Loki x female reader)

Read chapter 23 here //Series Masterlist

Chapter 24

Summary : Are these dreams just coincidences or there's some truth to it? You were about to get all the answers.

Warning: 18+, gratuitous smut, soft Dom Loki, dirty talking, sub space if you squint, mention of stalking, mention of psychological torture, angst, insecurities, ptsd, self deprecating behaviour, panic attack, praise kink, soft precious bean loki,

You stared at him for a moment as you tried to make sense of his words, how did he know? How did he know what had happened in your dream?

You remembered that day clear as today, you had approached Shawn and you told him why you were talking to him and he immediately went off as he called you a pervert and what not, once in a while the memory did prick your heart so you had just assumed that maybe seeing Loki instead of Shawn and having him treat you so nicely was the way for your brain to heal the hurt you still felt from that embarrassing ordeal.

Your mother proposed that you should spend the night there instead of going back to the hotel so you agreed and as you both reached the guest room you immediately locked the door and turned around to look at him

"How did you know? How do you know what happened in my dream?" He sighed as you said that and sat down on the bed.

"Come here" he tapped the side of the bed so you walked towards him but instead of sitting on the bed you climbed on his lap instead, your arms wrapped around his neck as you pecked him softly.

"This is going to sound very strange darling but I think we both had the same dream" you chuckled nervously as he said that.

"Are you messing with me?"

"I know it does seem like something i would do but i am not messing with you I promise"

"How is it possible?"

"I honestly have no clue but I think these weird dreams we have been having from past few days are not just coincidences. I fear there might be some truth to it, maybe it's something that was supposed to happen but a slight change in our paths diverted us from our destination"

"So that dream I had about Stephen.."

"It is possible that It may have been your reality elsewhere" you got off his lap as he said that.

"I don't understand..I'd never marry Stephen, this is all just a huge coincidence lo" he noticed how terrified you looked at the moment so he grabbed your arm and pulled you onto his lap again.

"It could be darling, it really could all just be a coincidence but it's still a substantial one don't you think? We would have met years before if I had come here the way me and Thor had planned" you looked at him shocked as he said that.

"What do you mean?"

"I was supposed to visit Midgard Along with Thor and the warriors three the same day you were at the fair with your sisters, you were supposed to meet me there" your eyes widened as he said that.

"Really you all had that awful bet with each other?" He cleared his throat as you questioned him.

"I am for certain not at all proud of my deeds in the past"

You smiled as he said that so he cupped your cheeks and pulled you closer to kiss you.

"But you really think you would have ..I mean…there were so many people at the fair, did you really notice me?"

"I told you I'd find you anywhere anytime" your eyes teared up as he said that.

"Are you saying that we were meant to be together? Soulmate type of stuff?" He let out a laugh as you said that.

"Not really, i do not believe in that –"

"Then what does it mean? What is all this about?"

"What I'm saying is that our paths were meant to collide, perhaps you were born to become mine someday precious y/n"

Okay that was a very sexy way to put in words.

"We could have met five years ago? Oh godddd" you got off his lap again as you realized that.

"Princess calm down"

"Noooo this is weird don't you see it? It's kind of creepy to be honest"

"It certainly is and I have no clue what I'm saying darling, maybe all these dreams are just a way to look into how our life had turned out if we made different decisions"

"Yeah that is possible, maybe it's just a coincidence"

He sighed as you said that.

"What?"

"Remember when I told you that I had a feeling there was another Stark the day I had escaped with the tesseract?" You nodded as he said that "and there were two Captains as well"

"Yesss what about it"

"What if they were from the future, from an alternate timeline "

"Ohhh God noo loki no"

"That would make sense, may be I was never to be in the possession of the tesseract, maybe I was supposed to go to Asgard and be prisoned for life"

"We wouldn't have met" he nodded as you said that.

"And we possibly didn't until–"

"Until what?"

"That party, your ex husband's birthday celebration where he had invited me"

"Why would I ever marry Stephen, he was rude and arrogant..it doesn't make any sense" you placed your hand on your forehead as you tried to make sense of these words.

"That is true"

"I don't want to think about it anymore it's scaring me" you sat down on his lap again and kissed him softly but it soon heated as he kissed you back with deeper intensity.

"Though I have to say it would have been amazing to meet you there, getting to spend my late twenties with you would have been blissful " your voice choked up as you mumbled against his mouth.

"I know sweetheart, it hurts to think of it now, perhaps if I had a companion such as you I never would have lost myself so tragically, perhaps instead of running away from who I was i would have run to you instead and i know deep down in my heart that you would have brought me back from the brink of the madness the way you have done in the past few months"

You hugged him tightly as he finished his words, he wasn't wrong. Maybe you two would have helped each other, several heartbreaks, several betrayals, all of those moments where you felt like giving up on everything, where living with yourself only got harder and harder, maybe you wouldn't have suffered so much if you had a friend like him in your life.

Yeah having him back then would have been a blessing but you were blessed to find him when you did, you were just glad that you did because if those dreams from the past are real then those dreams from the future must be what may have happened if Loki hadn't picked up the tesseract that day, you wouldn't have gotten the chance to see him or have him by your side for few more years, no you'd rather have this then whatever mess you had made out of your life. Marrying Stephen strange? What made you do that?.

Next morning Thor picked you both up and he dropped you both to New York at the Avengers towers since Loki had to be at a meeting. You wondered if you were going to travel via an airplane ever again. You did save time, money as well as the environment so it's not that you were complaining, just a thought you had.

"Just stay here and relax, I will return to you in an hour" he made you sit down on his bed as he said that.

"That's a long time what I'm going to do until then" you made a pout so he smiled, the mischievous smile on your face made him believe that you were teasing him.

"Hmm that is a huge problem" you smiled as he cupped your cheeks and leaned down to kiss you.

"It is, I'll just touch myself while you're gone" he gasped as you said that.

"Don't you dare do that"

"Are you telling me what to do?"

"Yes, and you're going to follow my commands like the good princess you are"

"We will see"

He shook his head before he made his way to the door, he turned around to look at you one more time and smiled before he left and then he was gone. His heart felt full, for once in his life he felt completely at peace.

You sighed and laid down on the bed but just to tease him further you pulled the straps of your dress lower and squeezed your arms to enhance your cleavage, clicking a naughty selfie you send it to him.

"You look lost, everything alright with lady y/n?" Thor asked him so Loki sighed. He knew he was going to come across as insane if he was to share the whole dream reality possibilities with anyone else.

"You adore her do you not?" Thor chuckled as Loki said that.

"You remember how we used to pretend that Lady Sif was our sister when we were childrens?" Loki smiled as he reminisced about his childhood.

"I do remember fairly well brother"

"I think I have found a real sister this time, so don't do anything that would make me lose her" Loki smiled and nodded in agreement, every woman he had ever been with in Asgard always salivated after his brother, there were plenty of times when they both slept with the same woman because she wanted Thor, you were the only woman he had ever known that picked a fight with his brother the first time they met, you always had your eyes on him only.

He knew he shouldn't have checked his phone in the middle of the meeting but he made the mistake and had an instant hard on, he could only see the curve of your bosom and even your full face wasn't visible but he saw your luscious plump lips and all he wanted to do was run to you and kiss you but he was stuck in a meeting instead.

When he went back to the room, he found you sleeping on the bed on your front, you made him wide awake and then went to sleep peacefully.

As you heard the door shutting you opened your eyes and looked at him, he waved his fingers and you noticed the bulge in his pants so you sat up.

"You know it's good for my ego that you find me so desirable" you crawled towards the edge of the bed and he closed the distance between you two.

"It's easier to hide the evidence of my arousal but it still pains me, I sat there for an hour just wanting to rub myself against you" you bit on your lips as he said that .

"Mmm can't you just magic away the pain or numb it?" You asked as you sat down on your knees and hooked your fingers around the loop of his pants to pull him closer, after unbuttoning him you pulled the zipper down, his eyes remained transfixed on your face.

"I certainly can, darling but what is the fun in that?"

"I have been dying to do this" his cock twitched at your words, your voice remained low and whispery. You wrapped your palms around his ass and pulled him closer to your face, his cock hit you right on the mouth.

He conjured a hair tie and you gasped at the beauty of it, it was thin and black but had studded beads decorating it, it wasn't ordinary, nothing about him was ordinary except you. He pulled your hair up in a ponytail and tied them with a band then he clutched them with his fist and pulled your hair slightly to make you look at him, leaning down he kissed you softly

"I love you, you will tell me even if you are feeling a smidgen of discomfort alright?" he murmured against your mouth and you squirmed on your spot. How did you get so lucky? How did you end up finding a man that loved you this way?

"Yess god"

"Is that how you're going to address me"

"Mmmhm do you like that?"

"Absolutely, i am your God darling"

His fingers scratched your scalp in a soothing manner as he kissed you, you unbuttoned his shirt so you could touch his bare skin, you planned to make this worth his time even though you had no experience in this department

"I have never done this before lo" you mumbled softly so he pulled away and looked at you,

"Never?"

"Noo i ..I never wanted to, never felt the need to do it" he smiled as you said that. A part of him was utterly revealed, he felt special that you had never pleased a man this way before.

"You will learn"

"Goddd you're sexy"

"Mmmm, do whatever you want to do darling" his voice was strict and commanding and you could feel yourself dripping, he was such a sweet baby sometimes that it always took you off guard whenever he shifted into this dominating mood.

You fisted his cock and gave him a stroke, his mouth opened and head rolled back as he let out a moan, your other hand caressed through his chest and then you moved them towards his ripped torso,

You laid his cock flat against his abs and kissed down from his shaft to the end of his balls, he mumbled a curse as you licked a stripe from bottom to the tip of his cock. Your hands grabbed his cheeks again and you pressed your face into his pelvis, the coarse hair rubbed against your face and tickled everywhere but you didn't care, you were too lost in his masculine intoxicating scent, the musk made you want to hump against him like an animal. The sight of you being so lost almost made him want to cum instantly. This was your fantasy and it was much more arousing than he had envisioned in his imagination.

The precum dripped from the tip of his cock so you licked it off before you sucked him in slowly, you knew you won't be able to swallow him completely, it was impossible. He was too big for your mouth and your gag reflex was sharp as hell

"You may have never done this before sweetheart but you sure know how to make me crumble so easily don't you?"

You smiled and kept your eyes on him as you sucked him in and out of your mouth slowly, your hands played with his balls and he seemed to be in heaven. As pulled him out, he looked down at you again, the naughty smirk on your face was damning, he pulled on your hair making you moan and wince all at once, pressing his thumb on your jaw he pulled your mouth open and pressed his cock inside your warmth.

He wasn't being harsh though, he was being very gentle as he fed you his cock, his hips jerked back and forth as he fucked your mouth slowly.

You squeezed on his thigh so he pulled out of you but instead of shoving his cock back in he immediately pulled you up slightly and kissed you as passionately as he could, he could taste himself on you.

"On your front sweet love" he mumbled softly so you laid down on your front, you felt his lips on your neck and then he unzipped your dress to lower the straps down but he didn't take it off, you felt him waving his fingers and a few seconds later you had his cock sliding in and out of your wetness.

"Mmmm i thought you'd come in my mouth dear God"

"Fuckkk darling i wasn't sure you wanted that" you whined as he said that. How could you not want to drink from him? You were utterly, intensely obsessed with him. Did he still doubt that?

"I am so thirsty for you, don't you see it? I'm so obsessed with you lo, you're my god and I'll let you do anything to me" You turned your head to look at him, your eyes were glassy as if you were high on drugs, he knew the look because he had been high with you before, you were getting drunk on him, he had never felt so turned on before.

He kissed you deeply before he pulled out of you.

"I love you so much princess.. I love you" he whispered softly before he turned you around and laid you on your back, he sat right above your face with his thighs wrapped around your shoulders.

"You wanted me to suffocate you hmm?" You moaned as he said that, you had never felt so horny in your life before, he made the condom disappear and then he shoved his cock into your mouth slowly, still being gentle as ever. You angled your head upwards as you flattened your tongue and felt him sliding in, placing his hands on the headboard he used them as an leverage to keep his weight proportioned so he wasn't crushing you, his hips bucked back and forth slowly as he made love to your mouth.

"Fuck yess darling, you're such a good subject for your god aren't you"

You would have answered him if your mouth wasn't so full of him, all your senses were closed off as he was the only thing you could smell, taste, see, hear and feel around you. This is exactly what you wanted and now that you had it you felt transcended into some other dimension.

Your hands wrapped around his ass and you gave him a squeeze, he pulled out of your mouth and you watched his fist wrap around his own cock, it always felt extremely erotic whenever he was touching himself and pleasing himself for you.

You took a deep breath as the sight saturated you, you couldn't even look at him at the moment, you felt so dirty but not in a bad way. Millions of thoughts were running in your head, he was your best friend, he was the guy that had cuddled you like a baby that first night, he was the love of your life and you just felt overwhelmed that this was even happening to you, that you had actually gotten so lucky just because he picked up that cube.

"Open up princess, drink every little drop" he grunted loudly as he came hard aiming it right into your wanting mouth and the moment you had a taste of his cum you just knew you were ruined forever, there would be no returning from this, you'd be his slave forever if he'd ask you to be.

You swallowed every last drop that he had blessed you with. He took a few seconds before you felt him step away from your face and he immediately had your legs wrapped around him, you gasped as you felt him sliding in again and he picked up a fast rhythm because he knew you were feeling overwhelmed.

"Lokiii lokiii…oh lokii" he looked at you as you chanted his name like a prayer, you seemed so out of your mind and he would be lying if he said he wasn't enjoying the sight of you being so mindless. You moaned his name over and over again as you came around him soon after, not much stimulation was required after his gratuitous display of domination.

"Mmmm lokii god please don't leave me" you whimpered so he cupped your cheeks and kissed you softly.

"Shhhh darling I'm right here..right here"

"You would leave" your eyes teared up so he shook his head,

"Never, you are mine for eternity and I am yours" your arms wrapped around his neck as you pulled him into an embrace, your mind felt hazy, you didn't even when he had picked you up but you got back to your senses you found yourself sitting between his legs in a bathtub few moments later.

You quickly turned around and wrapped your arms around his neck.

"What happened?" He smiled as you said that.

"You must have gotten overwhelmed my darling"

"I lose all the filters with you in bed"

"Ohhhh" he kissed you softly as you mumbled

"We need a safeword, you are kinkier than i anticipated" you chuckled as he said that.

"Mmhm and i enjoy that thoroughly, but I just want to keep you safe my sweet little princess, I'd never forgive myself if I was to hurt you "

"You could never hurt me lo i promise but I understand..I'd like a safeword too so I'm not hurting you…how about tesseract?"

He smiled as you said that.

"Perfect"

You felt ravenous after that intense workout so he took you to the kitchen area, that's where you both bumped into Darcy and you felt extremely awkward around her.

"Haven't seen you in a week Darcy, everything alright?" He asked her so she smiled.

"Yeah buddy..it's all good, I am just busy with my thesis" he nodded as she said that.

"Need help?" He smiled as he questioned and she sighed.

"No I'm almost done..see you later" she walked out after that and you noticed the worried look on his face so you caressed his arm in a comforting manner.

"She likes you" he looked at you surprised as if he could never believe that he was being thirsted after by so many people.

"What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean lo" he seemed worried as you said that.

"No, I never gave her a reason to do so, have I led her on?" You wrapped your arms around his waist as he said that.

"Nooo ..lo you don't lead people on, they just fall in love with you like I did, it's not that hard really"

"Well to be completely truthful I was trying to make you fall for me" you chuckled as he said that.

"Just…talk to her later okay? I know you like her ..as a friend " he nodded as you said that.

"You are still my best friend, you know that right?"

"Mmhmm"

Later that night Thor dropped you back at your apartment as loki had to be at a mission but just half an hour later you heard the knock on the door so you looked via the peephole and it was Loki.

"What are you doing here lo?" You smiled widely as you opened the door "Is this a new attire? Never seen it before" you asked him as you noticed the blue Asgardian leather attire he had on, it even had a large cape around the back, you had come to recognise the look of the Asgardian leather at least. But his attire wasn't the only thing different about him, his hair looked different as well.

"Is something wrong?" You asked him as you noticed the pale look on his face, his eyes were teary and he seemed as if he had seen a ghost.

You took a step back as something felt off about him, you could just feel it in your gut.

"You're not my loki are you?"

"No..but you're not my y/n either"

You took several steps behind you and your eyes welled up, you felt terrified. That's when Stephen appeared next to him. He had a costume on as well, you didn't understand what was happening but you knew none of this could be good. Stephen stepped towards you as he smiled.

"Good to see you again Y/n Y/l/n, I am Doctor Stephen strange, the sorcerer supreme, the protector of the Sanctum Santorum, we need to have a little chat"

👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

Note : You guys are going to get alot of the answers in the next chapter

Taglist (if you want to be tagged or removed let me know.. also I’m not able to tag some of you, please check your settings)

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[riahlynn101]

"DFO One Shot: Bonus #4 - In My Time of Need."

Trigger warnings: AFO being himself, emotional abuse, abandonment issues, children in distress, and kidnapping.

Characters: Tenko, AFO, Inko, Izuku, and the Shimura family.

Word count: 2,843

--

Inko is four months pregnant when she reconnects with her brother. The one she never got to meet due to their father dying right before she was born, and their mother placing him in the foster system and then abandoning her in some nowhere hospital. 

Her brother, Kotaro, is ecstatic to meet her. He talks a mile a minute. About his work and accomplishments and how proud he is of her and all about his family. His father-in-law and mother-in-law, wife, and his two kids. There’s a soft fondness to his voice when he brings them up, a dreaminess in his gray eyes. 

(She supposes, for people like them, having a family like that would be a dream.) 

In turn, she talks about her fiance and her pregnancy. It’s not as glamorous as his life, but Kotaro listens intently as she talks. 

(It’s nice, even if he’s pretending to care.)

She’s five months pregnant when she starts to have doubts about her upcoming marriage. Her fiance is more distant, and not as attentive as he used to be. 

He blames work, but she knows better. She’s seen his eyes wander to her swollen belly, has watched some measure of fear enter his eyes whenever she brings up anything having to do with their baby.

But she stays quiet. The fear of being alone again eats away at her, making her perpetually stressed out. 

She’s six months along when she finds out her fiance’s terrible secret. It’s right there, laying on the dining room table. Spelled out on starch white paper. If Inko didn’t know better, she might assume he left it there on purpose.

Maybe he did. 

Because he doesn’t come home that night….

….or the next night after that.

He ignores her phone calls, and any attempts to call the company he works for are met with a disconnected service. 

Her - their (even though Hisashi is being weird, and might possibly be a villain doesn’t mean that he’s any less a father) baby kicks all the time now. Inko loses track of when he sleeps. It used to be during the day, but maybe this is normal. She’s a first time mom with no one to ask or turn to. 

She consults the internet before remembering her sister-in-law, Nao. 

Nao is more than helpful, but Inko leaves feeling woefully underprepared. She goes home and cries. She cries until her sides hurt and the tears stop leaking from her eyes. 

The next morning, as the sun rises, she makes a decision. 

Inko is seven months pregnant when she asks a favor from her brother and his wife. 

“Can you take care of my baby for me?” She asks, head bowed from the weight of the request. 

Her brother’s smile is thin when he answers. It’s hard to tell if it’s because he’s angry with her or sad for her baby. She doesn’t have it in her to ask. “Of course,” he says. “We’ll love him like he’s our own.”

They start the paperwork soon after that, and Inko starts handing over all the baby things she and Hisashi bought. Well, most of them anyway. Some of the stuff is too sentimental. It hurts her heart to look at it now, but she knows someday she’ll want to see it. And who knows, maybe her ex-fiance will too.

Inko is eight months pregnant when she goes into labor. It’s sudden, and her instinctual response is to call out for Hisashi. But he doesn’t come (of course he doesn’t). His side of the bed is still made up from the morning he left. It’s cold. She tries not to look at it every night. 

She fails. 

Through her tears, she calls her brother who tells her to call an ambulance, and that he’ll meet her at the nearest hospital. 

The next few hours are a blur of her sister-in-law talking her through the blinding pain, nurses asking her questions, and pushing. 

Inko’s finally rewarded with a high-pitched cry. Her body is in agony, torn in ways she can’t possibly imagine, but her baby is here. 

“It’s a boy,” a nurse says, voice muffled behind her mask. “Do you want to hold him?” 

Inko’s throat suddenly feels tight. She turns her face away. “No, I-I’m okay.” She points a trembling finger at her sister-in-law talking quietly on the phone in the corner. “She’s his mother now.” Her heart breaks at those words, but it’s for the best. If she holds the baby now, she might never let him go. 

It doesn’t escape Inko how, in trying to avoid being like her birth mother, she turned out to be just like her. 

The nurse nods solemnly, and moves to get Nao’s attention. Inko closes her eyes, refusing to see what she can’t have. 

-x-x-x-

Tenko is four years and three months old when his mommy and daddy bring home a new baby. It’s small and tiny and already has a head full of curly green hair. 

“His name is Mikumo,” mommy says, placing the baby in Hana’s arms. She puts a hand on Tenko’s shoulder. “I trust you two will be the best older siblings you can be?” It’s not a question, but Hana and him respond in unison. 

“Yes!” 

-x-x-x- 

The next few months are hell on Inko. She somehow manages to get a job with her lackluster employment history. Her days become an endless blur of working, eating, and sleeping. She stops answering phone calls and emails.

She exists but only barely. 

And then, on a rainy afternoon, exactly five months and six days after she gave birth, Hisashi comes home. 

“I’m sorry, honey,” he says, as if that would be enough. “I was scared.”

So was I! She wants to scream, but Inko’s always shied away from conflict so she settles on a non committal, “mhm.” 

Her fian- ex-fiance reaches for her, strong arms that she used to take refuge in coming to pull her into a hug. Inko thinks of what their life could have been if he hadn’t abandoned her and their-

Inko feels her throat constrict and chest tighten. She takes a step back. When she speaks her voice shakes. “Don’t.”

Hisashi sighs. “I came back,” he murmurs. She doesn’t have to look up to know that he’s staring at her. Emotional intelligence has never been his strong suit, and that’s never been more apparent to her then right now. 

She holds her hands out in front of her. “You left.”

“I came back,” he repeats. “I came back for you and our son.”

The first tear always takes her by surprise. It’s warm and tastes like salt sliding past her lips and down her chin. She sniffles, holding a tight fist over one of her eyes. 

C’mon, Inko, she berates herself. Don’t cry! Don’t cry! Don’t-

Hisashi pushes past her defenses and pulls her close. He kneels down. “It’s okay,” he says. 

“N- no! It’s not! It’s not!” She cries, frantically shaking her head. “I-I did a bad thing.”

He strokes her hair. “What happened?” 

“I gave…” Inko has to force herself to breathe through her sobs. “I gave our baby up for- for ad-adoption.”

She feels Hisashi tense. His hand drops from her hair. He pulls her away, holding her by her shoulders. The expression on his face shocks her the most. Never, in the six years they’ve known each other, has he ever looked at her like that. 

Like he wants to kill hurt her. 

Inko feels a lot like a deer in headlights, unable and unwilling to move. She hiccups, trying to wrench his hands off her shoulders.

“Why?” He asks, but before she can answer, Hisashi asks another. “To who?”

“My brother.”

“Your brother….?” Hisashi almost seems confused. He tilts his head to the side. Something flashes in his eyes suddenly. Something that makes Inko struggle harder against the man she once so badly wanted to marry. He smiles at her but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Ah, yes, Kotaro.”

Hisashi pats her head. It makes her feel small. 

It makes her feel like a child. 

“That’s fine, dear.” He leaves as quietly as he came in. Inko crumbles to the floor, sobbing and shaking. 

-x-x-x-

“Ku-chan,” Tenko sing-songs, holding his arms out. Mommy says that babies start crawling at about six months, but his baby brother is only five and likes to crawl all over the place. Which he likes to brag about to Mikkun and Tomochan when they play together. 

Mon-chan trots along, following after them. She barks at the baby when Ku-chan gets too close to the road or tries to put something not very good in his mouth, but otherwise seems content to watch from a safe distance. 

Hana sits on the other side of the baby, arms also spread out. “No,” she whines. “Ku-chan!”

The baby looks between them, deciding who to go to. It’s a hard choice, Tenko knows, but Ku-chan loves him best. Daddy even said so, though he laughed after he said it, so maybe that isn’t true. He frowns, hands falling into his lap. 

The baby coos in his direction, throwing himself back into a crawling position. Spit covers his chin (“why is Ku-chan slimy?” Hana once asked their mom. “Because he’s teething, sweetheart.” Tenko doesn’t know what “teething” is, but it must be gross.) But he can’t even pretend to be grossed out, especially when Ku-chan is going to pick him!

He raises his hands once more, ready to be accepted, if only for a moment in time. 

The sliding door slams open. “Tenko!” Daddy shouts, and the moment is ruined. 

-x-x-x-

His son’s hair is green - lighter than Inko’s but close enough in shade to be compared. All for One counts the baby’s freckles. He vaguely remembers Nana’s husband having freckles, or maybe it’s from some distant part of his own family (distant, in his case, meaning anyone outside the vestige of his mother and whatever faraway memories remain of his stubborn younger brother). There’s eight of them, spread out like stars on his chubby cheeks. 

He reaches down, carefully scooping up the baby, and reclaiming what is rightfully his. His son groans but remains blissfully asleep. All for One presses the baby to his chest, lightly bouncing him. 

“I’m so glad to finally meet you,” he whispers, kissing the crown of his son’s head. He turns to leave. A plan forms in his head. They’ll have to move after this and Inko will have to cut contact with the Shimuras. She’ll be devastated, but it will pass quickly. Being reunited with their son should soothe any of her worries.

As angry as it makes him, All for One can sympathize with her decision to part with their child. And if he were capable of owning up to his mistakes, he would have told her the real reason he left Inko while she was pregnant.

All for One has never cared about his upbringing. He has never once thought about the atrocities he witnessed growing up in the slums, nor about his only solace being the cold embrace of a mother that both hated him and celebrated him, and a sickly twin brother that apparently didn’t care for him as much as All for One did him. And it doesn’t bother him to recall the empty feeling in his stomach every night, or the vile adults that used to taunt him and his brother in broad daylight, waving food around and calling them terrible, terrible names (he hates daylight for that reason. Daylight means he can’t fight back. He can’t wipe the sneer off their faces, teach them to fear him). 

No, he has never cared about his upbringing, but from the moment Inko announced she was pregnant, All for One couldn’t stop thinking about it. 

What if he’s bad at being a father?

He feels weak and silly for thinking such things but the thought remains, hovering over him like a dark cloud. 

He pushed it down, until he couldn’t anymore. All for One prefers to stand his ground (there aren’t many that could beat him anyway), but the more the baby grew, the more he wanted to run away. And he did, eventually. 

But he’s back now, which is all that matters. 

Now that he has their baby back, they can be a family again. 

Someone breaks the quiet with a sniffle. He turns towards the only other bed in the nursery. Big gray eyes look up at him in fear. Tenko Shimura - his future vessel. He inwardly groans, this could be bad. If Tenko recognizes him from this encounter later on, it could lower his credibility.

“What are you doing with Ku-chan?”

It takes All for One an embarrassingly longtime to realize the boy’s talking about the baby. “Him?” He asks, motioning with his head to the little body gathered in his arms. 

“Yeah. Where are you going?”

All for One thinks fast. “I’m….taking him back to the little brother factory.”

In the sweetest voice, Tenko repeats, “to the little brother factory?”

“Uh, huh. It’s where all little brothers are produced. My s- Ku-chan needs a minor repair. He’ll be back tomorrow.”

Tenko seems to consider his words, sucking in his bottom lip. “Mhm, promise?”

He somehow manages to suppress an eyeroll. “Promise.”

“M’kay.”

All for One starts to leave again. “Mister, is it okay if I kiss him ‘goodbye’? It’s scary out there at night time, and I know my baby brother doesn’t like the dark.”

Somewhere in the cold abyss of his chest lies a broken heart. Tenko’s words bring him back to a time where the only person he cared about was his own baby brother, small and helpless and also afraid of the dark. 

Against his best judgment, he brings his son over to Tenko who quickly sits up. The boy leans closer to the baby, pressing several kisses on his cheeks, forehead, and nose. “I’ll miss you lots and lots, Ku-chan. But we can play with Mon-chan tomorrow when you come back from the factory, ‘kay?”

All for One already knows the two boys will never meet again, and that all of Tenko’s memories will be either used as leverage to bolster his own plans or completely wiped clean. It’s unfair but life rarely is.

Maybe in a past life or the one after this, they can be brothers. 

But not in this one. 

In this one, All for One has plans. Plans that rely on keeping them apart. 

So, he pats Tenko on the head and waits for the boy to close his eyes before finally escaping. 

That night, he returns home, baby in tow. Inko is still on the living room floor where he left her. She looks between him and the baby slumbering in his arms. She doesn’t bombard him with questions, just welcomes him and their son home. 

They’re together again. 

-x-x-x-

Tenko remembers his baby brother. He remembers his big green eyes and curly green hair and the freckles that decorated his brother’s cheeks. He remembers how happy his brother always was, clapping his hands and giggling. He remembers how Hana and him liked to play ‘peek-a-boo’ with Ku-chan, and how the baby loved it every single time. 

He remembers the night Ku-chan was taken away, clutched to - what Tenko, at four-years-old, could only describe as - a real-life giant. The man had been kind to him that night and he promised to bring Ku-chan back the next day. Except Ku-chan never came back….

Mom and dad tried to find his brother, but they never did. 

Tenko tries not to remember the sounds of his mom’s screams when the detective told them the baby was likely dead or worse. 

At the time, he had no idea what could be worse than dead. But it had to be pretty bad for his dad cry (the only other time in his memory where his dad cried was right before Tenko killed him). 

The memory of his maybe-maybe not dead brother is brought to the forefront of his brain. He looks into a pair of familiar forest green eyes.

Izuku Midoriya has been a thorn in his side for a little over a year now. From the first moment he laid eyes on the little hero brat he couldn’t stop thinking about him. It frustrated Tenko that he couldn’t shake the feeling that he knew Midoriya from somewhere.

It suddenly clicks for him while watching Midoriya struggle to get up. He took quite a few blows trying to prevent Tenko from decaying Mount Fuji. His breathing comes out ragged, likely due to that particularly annoying quirk that makes Sensei’s vestige vibrate with sheer anger. 

Midoriya forces himself to his feet, trembling like a leaf. He looks up at Tenko, determined, and it’s at that moment he chooses to remember Ku-chan.

In a voice so small there’s no way Midoriya or the other vestiges can hear him, Tenko murmurs an apology. “I’m sorry, little brother.”

[tellthatbrokebitch]

aw, what the hell. some cute mike meeting his niece for the first time, from the next chapter of if i get too close

Bee’s a truly beautiful baby, picture perfect: huge blue eyes, brown curls, rosy cheeks. In her tiny jeans and sunny yellow t-shirt, she looks like a little angel, with her yellow hearing aid curled over her right ear, like her halo had slipped down from her curls. When she sees him, she scrunches up her little nose and points at him with a look at her moms, like she’s asking, “who the hell is this guy?”

Nancy crouches down in front of Karen and smiles at her daughter.. “This is your Uncle Mike,” she explains, poking Mike’s chest. “Mike.” She pokes Bee’s tummy next, making her giggle. “Bee.”

“Mama!” Bee crows happily, and Nancy hangs her head with a sigh.

“That’s the only M-word she knows,” Robin stage-whispers, giggling at whatever face he’s making.

“Mike,” Nancy tries again, bringing Bee’s hand up to her mouth and speaking with her lips against the skin of Bee’s palm. “Mike.”

Bee looks ecstatic. “MAMA!” she shouts again, pointing at Mike before looking back at Nancy for approval.

“We’ll… work on it.” Nancy lifts Bee up in her arms and settles her on her hip. “You wanna go see your Uncle Mike?”

Bee looks at him again, cocking her head to the side like a puppy as her gaze drifts from his messy hair to the chain around his neck. She zeroes in on the shiny metal and wordlessly holds out her arms to Mike, just like that.

Five years ago, Mike got to hold Lacey once, just once, before she’d burst into tears and he’d hastily handed her back. That’s the extent of his baby experience, barring when Holly was born, but that doesn’t really count because Holly was a mama’s girl and wouldn’t let anyone but Karen hold her anyway.

Still, Bee’s staring up at him, still holding her arms out expectantly, so Mike hesitantly places his hands on either side of her middle and lifts her up and away from Nancy. Mirroring his sister, he props her on his hip and supports her with one hand under her armpit and the other curved around under her bottom.

Before she’s even settled, she reaches out and grabs for his chain, but Nancy pries the metal from her surprisingly strong grip almost immediately. “That’s an ouchie, Bee,” she says, tucking the chain into Mike’ hoodie so it’s mostly hidden. “We don’t wanna hurt Uncle Mike, do we?”

Bee’s mouth dips down into a frown, but she redirects to his hair, patting at the damp almost-curls. “Duh!” she says.

“We’re working on not pulling on people’s hair,” Robin explains at Mike’s obvious bewilderment. “We can touch hair, but only to pet. Like a doggy.”

“Duh!”

“Yes, good job, Bee!” Nancy coos, pressing a kiss to Bee’s arm with an over-exaggerated lip-smacking sound, mwah! that elicits a sunny giggle directly into Mike’s ear

From the dining table, Karen’s watching everything with suspiciously wet eyes. At Mike’s look, she shakes her head and sniffles. “When are you going to give me grandkids, Michael?” she asks, and hell no.

Mike almost gives Bee back to Nancy at the immediate violence with which he rejects the idea. “Yeah, definitely never, Mom,” he says, bouncing Bee a bit when she picks up on his distress and makes a whiny noise of displeasure. “I can barely keep myself alive, much less a kid.”

Karen frowns. “Well, not right now obviously. But someday, when you meet a nice girl-”

“Mom-”

“Or a boy, I suppose, I shouldn’t assu-”

“Mom.” “Okay, okay, I’ll drop it. For now.”

[ambrosiasaladofthebrain]

Ambrosia Salad of The Brain

Ch 1: Meet Jake

The teacher’s note read like it usually did: “Nice Job” written under a circled 100% and a smiley face creating a small triangle of pen ink. Jake knew it was childish, it was because he was far younger than all of his classmates that his math teacher always left small notes of encouragement and excitement on his tests, but he supposed he didn’t care. He still cut each one out carefully before throwing out the test and placing the scrap onto the growing pile in the box he kept under his bed.

 He would show his sister the pile someday and she would be impressed with how well he had done. That day would probably be soon, hopefully soon. For now he would stack them until the box burst. With the ringing of the bell the school day came to a close and he scrambled to collect his things and leave before the mass of bigger students could trample him.

He was quick to make it to the front steps, wanting to double check his items before he left. Someone had stolen his first aid kit but he still had his second one which was good enough. There was a father a couple blocks from school who had started robbing from the richer district people who came to feel better about themselves and show off. These people often had bodyguards with some pent up emotions they needed to release. Jake couldn’t stop the man from doing what he could for his kid but he could apply his basic knowledge of first aid. He might be an amateur but where he lacked in practice he hoped his mind and memory made up for it. He supposed living in a hospital and watching professionals daily had to have upgraded his skills somewhat. 

He also needed the bread he had saved from lunch, a pack of rats had taken root in an alleyway he had to pass to get to the hospital and their attacks on random passerbyers were getting worse, as long as he threw them a good chunk of food however, they seemed to leave him alone. Simon had tried to protest Jake’s sharing of half his lunch with rats but he understood that certain measures had to be taken, and not a week later after the incident he had started carrying bread for a gang of rats on his block as well.

With his rusted swiss army knife prepared he was ready to walk home. He just needed to check in with Simon and Piet who were unusually late. They were usually at their meeting spot first, skipping their class to share a smoke, or, he thought they still smoked, they promised they had quit but they still carried packs and lighters and the smell never left their fingers and breath, nor their sweaters he needed to return.

“Hey kid!” Simon called as he left the building and hopped down the steps, tripping on a hole, and stringing a colorful display of words together as he stumbled to a stop. “‘Hey! Hey,” he corrected his volume with the second ‘hey’, looking apologetic, “Guess wha’ we got.”

“We?” Jake looked around, expecting to see Simon’s ‘better half’.

“Yeah, uh.” Simon looked around, before swearing again, “I lost her. No! The love of my life! Gone! Sorry, gone,” he corrected his volume again, really trying not to be so aggressively loud. “I’ll nev’a see ‘er again. Lost, to the chaos of the school, or maybe the lunch lady,” he shrugged, flopping down on the school steps, “Beauty like that will surely be missed, I’ll nev’a love anoth’a,” he clenched a fist to his chest, suddenly being tackled from behind

“That’s right you won't! But maybe I will! Leave your girlfriend to the demise a the lunch lady? She works out y’know. Too buff even fer me an’ you leave me! Ah Jake, ‘ey kiddo. how’d’yer test go?” Piet sobered down sitting on Simon’s back, pinning him to the ground as she reached for the 100% paper Jake handed her. “‘Ey, nice job, though I wasn’t all that worried, the one about explainin’ how ya did the work kept trippin’ ya up when we studied but ya’always pull through.”

“Thank you,” Jake blushed.

“I nev’a doubted ya either,” Simon added.

“Ah shut up,” Peit smacked his head lightly, “Anyway you got the goods?” 

“Duh,” Simon rolled his eyes, pushing Peit off and pulling a small cardboard box from his cardigan pocket. “Here ya are mister smarty pants.” He ceremoniously tossed the box to Jake who fumbled with it a moment before catching it properly and giving it a suspicious glance. 

“You didn’t,” He mumbled, cracking it open. “How? Where? The school doesn’t have a-”

“Eh I found some chips lyin’ ‘round an’, well, Peit has some chickens so we jus’ needed a stove ‘n a few other things,” Simon shrugged, Peit shrugging with him. 

Jake picked up the two chocolate chip cookies from the box, they were sloppy and a little flat, nothing like the images he had seen online but the last time he had had chocolate chip cookies had been with Zoey. He wondered if he could save one and find some milk but quickly shook the idea from his head remembering the growing prices.

“Thank you,” he whispered into the cookies, almost too quiet as he tried to stop the prickling of his eyes.

Piet let out a soft swear, raising a hand; “‘Ey don’t cry now, we were bored.”

“Yeah, it really wasn’ that hard even!” Simon added. 

“Or expensive, I mean, we stole most’a the stuff.”

“Sh!” Simon elbowed her, “No, we bought it, promise, promise,” He lied.

“Thank you,” Jake whispered again, breaking one of the cookies in half, then breaking that into two quarters, “Here.”

“We couldn’-” Piet began.

“Really?” Simon asked, “You sure?” He grabbed a quarter with excitement. Piet looked disgusted at him for a moment before taking her piece. The treat was dry and somewhat burnt yet uncooked all at once. It was very sweet, which was better than bitter Jake supposed, it would definitely benefit from a glass of milk though.

“Oh wow,” Piet coughed.

“You, don’ ‘ave to eat that Jake,” Simon grimaced, “I can throw that out.”

“No!” Jake held the small box close, glaring, “No, I’ll keep it, they’re not half bad.”

Simon’s watch on his outstretched hand buzzed, “I gotta get to work, you’ll be ok by yourself?”

“I walk every day by myself.”

“Doesn’ mean I can’t be worried.”

“You got your stuff?” Piet interrogated, “Books, pepper spray, pocket knife?”

Jake shuffled through his bag then pockets making a show of making sure it was all in place and hadn’t been stolen throughout the day despite having just done these actions moments ago, “Yep.”

“Alright. Get home safe bud,” She waved bye dragging Simon along with her.

Simon was still calling out to Jake; “I’ll be at the gate in the mornin’, and make sure to watch out for those rats, oh and cases of,” as they rounded the corner his calls disappeared with them. Jake giggled at them as he took another bite of his cookie and started his own walk. His first stop would be the rats and he needed to come up with good names for them.

He was still thinking of names for the rats when he left their alleyway. Rats are terribly smart creatures and Jake had always felt akin to them in some odd way. He was close to his next stop now, which meant he should get his swiss army knife ready. The Robber Father would never harm him but this wasn’t always his haunt, it was a very popular place for muggings to occur either way. However, while most let him by some people had become very desperate with the rising prices and crack down on crimes the President himself had initiated to help clean up the district.

Jake slowed, nearing the alley and peaking in. At first he didn’t see anyone but someone shifted in the pile of trash bags and Jake entered recognizing it as Robber Father. He squatted next to the man poking his arm with the dull knife. 

“Sir?”

The man groaned, sounding in pain, Jake scrunched his face looking for injuries. When he couldn’t outright see any stab wounds or broken bones Jake slapped the man's cheek, trying to wake him.

“Sir?” he called a bit louder.

This scene was reminding him a little too much of when he had found his sister. She had been warm, Jake felt the man’s forehead but his temperature felt normal enough. She had also coughed a lot as well as had a scratchy breath that seemed to tug at her throat, trying to stick to the sides. Jake brought his ear to the man’s mouth. His breath was soft if not slow.

“Siiiiirrrr!” Jake drew out his call, slapping the man's face repetitively.

“Wha? Who’s ther?” The man slew out, sitting up and focusing on Jake, “Oh, hey Doc, ‘ere for my checkup?” He rumbled as he sat up.

“What happened?” Jake asked, wanting to get to the point.

“Eh, this rich prick came into town lookin’ for trouble, I beat ‘em up but he got a couple hits to my stomach. Nother one’a those hit where it can’t be seen’ things, ya’know?” He lifted his shirt to show off the patchwork of bruising, “Could’a done better but I forgot to eat today.” He chuckled, Jake didn’t join him, rolling his eyes at the obvious lie. He pulled his gift box with the last half-a-cookie from his bag and handed it to the man before he could change his mind.

“Eh? Wha’s this?” Robber Father took it with a quizzical look, and gave a soft oh upon opening it, “A cookie? In this economy? Pretty impressive kid, you're basically the richest kid I’ve met now,” He went to hand the box back only for Jake to shove it back to him.

“You can have it, my frie-” Jake bit his tongue on the slip up, “Simon and Piet gave them to me, I already ate one, you have the rest.”

“The, ones who babysit ya at school?” Jake nodded. “They rich or somethin’?” “Nah, just stupid.”

Robber Father huffed a laugh, “Teenagers. My Rose ‘s turnin’ 14 soon y'know, you wanna come to the party?”

Was that a joke? When most kids invited him to a party it was usually to laugh moments later. Also people usually brought gifts to birthday parties and he had no money or anything to give.

“You don’t have to bring anythin’ kid, your, like, six-”

“I’m 8 (timephrame),” Jake informed, then realizing he’d interrupted quickly added a “Sorry!

“Point is, you wouldn’t need’ta bring anythin’, it’s next week, at that one park near the gas station with slushies, I can tell ya more details later if ya want?”

Jake nodded before looking at his watch, he needed to continue walking if he wanted to make it for the cafeteria’s dinner. He quickly waved goodbye and headed back out of the alley, pocketing his knife.

By the time he made it to the hospital the cafeteria was bustling. Jake quickly grabbed his food, it was watery soup and bread today, before leaving the loud area.

Jake balanced his meal tray in one hand to knock on Zoey’s door. After a beat of silence he opened the door.

“Hey Z! I’m back from school, I still needa check in with Joy but I said hi to a couple other people on my way here so she probably already knows. She’s been real strict ‘bout knowin’ where I am lately. I think it's prolly ‘cause I got picked up by that gang last week, they didn’t do anythin’, I was jus’ hangin’ out with’em, but I guess social services didn’t like that I was hangin’ out with a,” he set down his tray and threw off his backpack to use his hand for air quotes, “‘violent gang’ such as the Cat’s Claws. They’re honestly not that bad.”

Jake drug the armchair closer to his plate and Zoey’s bed, picking up his milk carton to clink it against her feeding tube gently. He drank his soup slowly, enjoying the few pieces of meat and feeling proud every time he chewed a potato. He had been helping in the hospital garden when he could. Something social services had made him do to keep him off the streets but he still enjoyed it.

“Y’know, S.S’s been strugglin’ lately Z. Well, they always are, but really, after all that trouble I told ya ‘bout they’ve been breathin’ down my neck lately. They don’t like the idea of me livin in a hospital, this one worker told me I was goin to disrupt the peace, or waste people's time, y’know cause it’s a hospital and doctors an’ nurses need to focus, but I’ve been tryin real hard to blend in, I stayed out late to not clog the hallways but then they yelled at Joy ‘cause I kept gettin inta trouble, even when I wasn’t!

“Jus’ cause I hang out with criminals doesn’t make me one! I mean, someone has’ta take care of ‘em, else they’re all gonna die of infections, I tell ya, one time I met a lady who had let a lill’ stab wound get infected, it was so gross, but nobody wanted to help her so I looked at it and guess what, she just needed to wash it out a bit and properly bandage it. I showed ‘er how to make bandages from scraps like ya taught me. I’m ramblin’ uh.

“Oh yeah, so after they gave me that curfew I started tryin to make friends with the other patients and they were all real nice but S.S. didn’t like that either for some reason, somethin’ ‘bout it not bein professional, I can talk to other patients my age an’ that's it apparently. Like that makes sense. So now I ‘ave’ta check in every day after school, an’ before Joy leaves, an’ she locks us in here now! Have you noticed? She always unlocks it at five the next mornin’ but still. It’s been real borin.”

Jake pushed a strand of hair from Zoey’s face, it was to her shoulders now, she’d probably want to cut it when she woke up. Or maybe not, Jake was pretty sure she had only cut her hair in support of him having to cut his, she’d always had these really detailed hair styles before that. He wove a messy braid into a small bit of her hair and smiled at the attempt. 

“Sorry fer ramblin’, I know it’s annoyin’. But, uh, when ya wake up can you teach me how’ta braid hair please? Ok, I’mma go check in with Joy now, love you.”

He waited a moment, breathed in, breathed out. When nothing followed he quickly got up, pushing his chair back into place and collecting his dishes.

In the cafeteria it had quitted just a bit, most people had gone back to their rooms and work now. Entering the kitchen wasn’t really allowed but, like in many things, Jake was an exception. Entering the kitchen always felt like going under water and only hearing the muffled voices of the surface. 

The kitchen staff always talked in soft voices that mixed with the cling and clack of kitchen utensils. The sound of people in the cafeteria would worm it’s way through the walls and dance with the quiet music that played quietly from a trashy radio someone had fished out of a trash and repaired years ago. The smells of food stuck to a schedule just as much as the food. Today had been potato soup so the music was samba, Chef Maya’s playlist. 

She always danced her way around the kitchen but on samba days her movements would grow smoother like they’d been defrosted especially for the day. 

Jake quietly started running water over his dishes, happy to be looked over in the bustle. Tomorrow was fresh bread Friday so the kitchen was moving in a muffled hurry to prepare. Usually Jake would love to help, bread was one of his favorite things to make, but he still needed to check in with Joy so he quickly waved to the welcoming chefs and left. 

Joy was on the second level like always. She was checking in on a patient who had come in with a severe case of  Stardust yesterday. They hoped he would wake up in the coming days but it wasn’t likely. Jake hoped he woke up soon. From the door window Jake watched as Joy drew his blood and added it to her vial already filled with another liquid. She shook it until the red changed to a silvery metallic color, knitting her brows at the reaction, Jake mimicked her face, scrunching his brows in a similar fashion. 

Doctors had done this to Zoey every so often, more frequently when she first arrived, when they still had higher hopes. They’d let him shake the vials until the colors changed as a sort of morbid entertainment. 

Sighing, Joy zipped the blood sample into a contamination bag and checked the rest of the patient's vitals. When everything was in order she headed to the door, spotting Jake in the process. She knitted her brows at him and he quickly jumped off the stool he’d drug over to the door and carried it back to her desk. A minute later she walked out of the patient room and over to Jake, taking off her medical mask, and tossing her gloves into a garbage.

“See this line?” She pointed to the obvious silver and navy hazard line painted into the floor. 

Jake looked at it, taking another step behind the desk that was outside the line that separated the Stardust ward from the entrance of the floor.

“You see it, right?” Joy said again, tapping her foot on the line twice.

Jake nodded, eyes fixed on the simmering silvery lines nestled between the blue. Apparently the floor had been originally closed off with a temporary tape made for the epidemic but when it became a-

“You’re not supposed to be lookin round this floor,” She nagged, pulling Jake from his thoughts.

“I know,” he mumbled. When it became a permanent issue-

“If Social Services found out I was lettin’ you wander ‘round they’d move you again.”

“I know.” When it became a permanent issue they painted the line.

“That’d be what? 5 houses in 11 months? I mean, y’know they hate you livin’ here, and I can’t really disagree, it’s no place fer a kid.”

“I know.”

“As soon as a place opens up they’re gonna be itchin’ for a reason to kick ya.”

“I know.”

“Yeah, I bet,” she sighed, sitting on the floor next to him, “You're lucky we got yer sister moved for you, ya’know.”

Jake gave her the look, he gave her every time she said that, like he was lucky the hospital had given up on Zoey’s recovery enough to move floors, like they were waiting for her bed to open up, like he was lucky social services was so overworked that they were desperate enough to send a 13 year old [timephrame] to live in a hospital, in the same room as his comatose sister. 

“Don’t give me that look,” she sighed.

He scrunched his face more, hoping to double whatever feeling it caused.

“Stop,” she groaned, squishing his face, causing him to freeze, “Sorry, uh,” she withdrew her hands and tucked them between her legs, “Sorry, yeah, yer not lucky, but, yeah. Take the wins kid. You're close to her, I mean, you practically lived here even ‘fore you officially got signed over. And now you get to have me as your legal guardian!” She pointed at herself excitedly, “How awesome is that?”

“You?” Jake asked quizzically.

“Yeah.”

“Hm,” Jake hummed, pretending to think hard about how great it really was, “I don’ know. I had this one real cool guardian who taught me boxin’.”

“Really?”

“Yep,” Jake popped the p, doing it a coupe times, liking the small pressure it caused in his chest and throat.

Joy chuckled, “How’d that work? Y’know, with the whole,” she waved her hands at him, not finishing her sentence.

“Uh, I don’ know, she jus’, took it real slow an’ had me practice with a dummy or spar with her but she wouldn’t spar back, only block. That took a while for me to be comfortable with. I almos’ got comfortable enough to have a normal practice, our goal was by the end of the month,” Jake smiled, remembering how excited she was to realize Jake trusted her that much.

“What happened? If you don’t mind?”

“Huh?” he cleared away the memories like a sticky residue,”oh, uh,” he thought for a second, trying to recall which offense matched her and not another guardian, “Oh! She was stealin’ from the district over, uh D-12, y’know the one with all those orchards, yeah they didn’t like that she was stealin all that produce, so she was sent to care for a field until she could properly make up for all the lost product. Should’a known somethin’ was up with how many smoothies she made me,” Jake smiled, remembering the apple milkshakes she’d make, at first he’d thought they’d be gross but let it be known he’d never turn down free food and sure enough they’d been a hit.

“Harsh. I think I hear Akuno’s passin’ a law ‘bout border crossin’ soon.”

“I think that’d do D-20 some good, wouldn’t have so many rich idiots passin’ through just to laugh at us.”

Joy hummed, patting her legs before getting up, “Alright, thanks for checking in, if not a bit late,” she added with a joking scolding voice, “I’ll check in before bed,” she turned to leave but suddenly turned back, “Oh, and, uh, so last week, right, Monday I think, we went to the library and I got the place’s number but I lost the slip and can’t remember it. I hate to do this but could you help me please?” She made an apologetics face clasping her hand in front of her.

Jake hummed trying to remember; last week, Monday, they had gone to the library, it had been sunny, but rain looked to be rolling in. Jake had been excited about that. He had wanted a book on observing vocal tone and needed to return his book on how to understand a person's body language. He’d found it, remembered where it was from the last time he visited, right next to a thick red book and a squat maroon book. When they left the librarian checking them out had talked to Joy, they’d had red hair, it was very pretty, Jake had thought their freckles were very pretty as well, he’d always liked freckles, the librarian had written down the library's number and handed it to Joy, and, oh! He had seen it then, in the exchange of hands.

“It was 218-734-345-3455, the five’s coulda been six’s though, they didn’t have the best handwriting.”

Joy wrote down the last number, making note of the five to six bit, “Perfect, thank you so much, I’ll call about that book fair for you asap, promise.”

“Ok.”

Jake waved goodbye, as Joy went to fulfill the rest of her tasks. First he went to the roof, helping with the garden, the potatoes had needed to be pulled today. Heading to the kitchen next they were still preparing bread and he found himself helping add things to mixers and memorizing recipes he was excited to try some day. Chef Ron loved to share tips on how to substitute expensive ingredients with cheap items. 

His brother, Remmy, always shared how to safely eat overdue food, he technically couldn’t share these items with the public but he would “accidently” leave items for Jake after “accidently” talking about the processes needed to safely eat the food or after they had already been prepared.  

Jake was writing a paper for his English class when Joy came to say goodnight.

“Hey sour patch,” she entered, chuckling at Jake’s huff of annoyance at the nickname he never understood, “Bed time,” she sing-songed, setting her bag on the floor, “Y’all ready?”

Jack hummed, focused on finishing his thought. Joy walked over to Zoey’s bed, flattening the odd wrinkles and fixing her stray hairs. Smiling at the girl, her eye’s softened for a second, then hardened with something like resolved. She inhaled, sipping air like it would solidify the emotions she was trying to press in place, not seeing the way Jake watched her. He had finished his thought, but finished or not he always secretly watched as Joy fussed with Zoey before getting him ready for bed.

Jake found himself copying her routine in the morning, making sure it looked just like how Joy did it. He could never perfect the tiny curl she would draw against Zoey’s cheek with a strand of hair.

“I’m ready,” he mumbled, setting the laptop in the nightstand drawer. 

“I better not find out you were on that all night,” Joy warned.

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Jake lied. 

They both knew it was a lie, But this was a lie he wouldn't get punished for because one: it wasn’t really a lie as they both knew the truth, and two: Joy encouraged studying even if she didn’t approve of him studying into the early hours of morning. It was his own fault if he was tired in the morning and couldn’t focus at school, and that was punishment enough. 

“Pjs?” Joy scanned.

“Check,” Jake lifted his arm, revealing his soft pig sweater.

“Teef?”

“Check,” he widened his gums as if to prove they’d been scrubbed.

“Bed made?”

He pointed at the small cot in the corner, perfectly made.

“Window locked?” She walked to the window herself, checking the bolt and trying to lift it open. She turned away satisfied when it stayed closed, “Alright, school tomorrow, then right back. Amanda,” she sneered the name with a fake and horribly inaccurate posh accent, “is checkin’ in at four, so best behaviors. Now, in bed.”

She herded him into his cot, pulling the blanket over him and tucking in his feet.

“We gotta cut yer hair soon, it’s like a curtain in-fron-a yer eyes, how-d-ya even see?”

Jake crossed his eyes, pulling a curl and watching it bounce. Dad wouldn’t be a fan of this length, it was already too long, long enough to pull, reaching his nose and covering his ears.

“I don’t really know,” He lamented, “I jus sorta look through the gaps.” He swayed his head, watching the curls move back and forth, then looking through the gaps made with the movement.

Joy huff, “Right, Well, for now, I’ll bring some hair ties with me tomorrow, I can cut yer hair later this week, a’right?”

“Ok.”

  Picking up her bag again she turned off the light, “I’m gonna lock the door now, you don’t need anythin?”

“Nope.”

“Ok,” she smiled, “See you two in the mornin.” 

Jake smiled back, “See you tomorrow, bye.”

Jake listened as she locked the door and her footsteps receded. He waited a minute before climbing out of his bed and into Zoey’s. He technically wasn’t supposed to do this, however Joy, upon catching him one too many times, had shown him the best way to sleep close to her while watching all the medical instruments plugged into her like a computer. 

“Hey Zoey,” he whispered, “I’m not gonna stay long promise, jus wanted to talk real quick see-” Someone jiggled the door knob to their room, and Jake zipped back to his bed. Joy must have forgotten something, she did that sometimes, forgetting to mention something or forgetting to give him something. The jiggling stopped, Jake held his breath a moment, waiting for Joy to properly unlock the door and walk in but nothing happened. Maybe one of the patients was walking around, sometimes they got confused.

Jake made his way back over to Zoey, crawling into the bed, “Weird,” he mumbled, “I heard one of the new patients is a sleep walker, I wanted t’talk to ‘em, see what it was like. I wonder if they dream when they walk, if the dreams affect how they interact with the world. Anyway, I scored well on that test I told you ‘bout. I knew I’d do good but confirmation is always nice. Oh, and I got invited to a birthday party today. I think it was a real invitation, not a joke, Imma ask more questions tomorrow. Oh, an’ Peit and Simon, y’know my babysitters, made me cookies today. With chocolate chips, I know they definitely traveled districts for that, maybe they’ll take me with ‘em one’a these days, probably not, I’m a bit of a liability. Plus, I think it’s like a date thing for them, I wouldn’t want’ta third-wheel.”

Jake paused, listening to the bustle of the hospital.

“Hey Zoey,” he looked up to her, patting her cheek. He told himself he wasn’t trying to wake her up, but there was always hope that maybe she’d rustle awake at the touch, “could I sleep with you tonight? It’s been 46 days since the last time I did.” Jake waited, a car passed outside; somebody walked past their door, casting a shadow under it; somewhere in the building someone laughed. “Alright, thank you.”

Jake curled himself into Zoey’s side and under the cover, inhaling and exhaling slowly, until sleep finlay came, and he woke up in his library.

The Library was not, against most people’s assumptions, organized. There was a desk when Jake first entered. Here a Jake that looked exactly like him sat, this Jake, he was often just called Desky, had a little laptop like Jake’s out in the real world and it ran somewhat slow. If real Jake wanted to remember something like “yesterday's lunch” this was his best bet but for things more complicated like the phone number from earlier today, he found it easier to travers his mind and find the memory he wanted with context.

Memories were often accessed like doorways for most people and Jake was no different even with his advanced memory. If he wanted to remember last Tuesday's lunch he’d first find last Tuesday in his library, then remember lunch time, who he’d been with maybe, what the menu at school had had to offer, something key like a fist fight breaking out. This sounded organized but his mind was still somehow a mess. 

Memories sat on the ground and were strewn across the shelves in odd orders, remembering a duck could remind Jake of green which would remind him of apples so of course those memories shaped like books were all currently stacked on top of each other on the floor. There was a crate somewhere in this library that moaned and tried to grab Jake’s attention but he had hidden it behind so many other random memories that he could only access it by really trying to remember those memories, or something reminded him of them, but he never wanted to think about them anyway so the box stayed hidden and Jake didn’t know were in The Library it was. 

Sometimes when Peit and Simmon wanted to talk without him hearing they’d ask him to think about how many pigeons he’d seen last Monday and he was always too naive to realize why they were asking at the time so he would delve into his library looking through Monday’s book, looking for birds he had seen and counting each one. When he would resurface the two’s conversation would be interrupted with his answer, their conversations had already been finished anyway.

As much of a mess as it was Jake loved his library. The odd ‘roof’ above was a deep swirling blue galaxy, shifting in hues and twinkling with stars. Vines laced their ways around  books and objects, red roses and other flowers blooming from oblong the body. Forget-me-nots timidly grew from crevices here and there, and while there was no smell inside his head except the wafting of a memory Jake liked to imagine it smelled of lilies and old books, crinkled and weary with age. 

The shelves ran high, decorated with ladders that stretched taller than buildings. The shelves housed more than books, flowers and shrubs burst from their counters. Toys and food stuck in time sat on display. Some of the books, placed between a puddle and a bowl of cereal were actually books he’d read and taken the time to perfectly reconstruct in his mind.

He was never lonely here either, versions of himself walked aimlessly, one version from each birthday, a version from hard to erase memories, and versions from mundane days. Each one would never exist again, only here could they remain like a copy of himself in that moment. Jake hated to even look at some of them but he knew even still, in some odd way he was never alone. Or maybe he should take Joy up on that offer of therapy. 

Sometimes Jake wished he could dream but being in the muted quiet of his head, organizing his memories and objects, he felt he was resting enough. Jake smiled as he picked up a book filled with all the recipes he’d learned, deciding to create a shelf for food related memories. Memories could be held on more than one shelf so he left this first version on the floor next to the book on pigs.

Jake spent his sleep organizing his memories on his new shelf, finally after some time he felt himself start to drift, starting to wake up. He stretched his hands over his head, it didn’t achieve much but he felt like one was supposed to do this after a bigger task so he did it anyway. Taking a step back to admire his work, something cold settled under his skin and panic wiggled it’s way into his heart as instead of hitting the hardwood floor or even waking up in bed his foot sank down. Instead of hitting the ground he fell into the floor.

Chapter 2

⭐️Hello hello! This is a story I've held close to my heart for a long time but haven't written a lot of. The other day I realized that when I started writing it I had expected be done with the first book by 2024. I'm goin to try n write a chapter a month (it'll probably be pocmarked with spelling mistakes ngl) but it's a challenge I hope I can keep up with 🌙

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

If I Fell For You (Part 9) - Inner Demons

Summary: The reader meets Gen for the first time while the boys are having a day together. But when they come home early and Jensen overhears the reader, a very big discussion about what they both expect out of their relationship has to happen...

Masterlist

Pairing: Jensen x nanny!reader

Square: Skinny Dipping

Word Count: 5,100ish

Warnings: mature (language, skinny dipping, implied future smut, angst, self-doubt)

A/N: Please enjoy! Also written for @spnkinkbingo​

________

“No,” whined Zeppelin as Jensen carried him out of the bedroom for the third time that night. “Daddy, I want to sleep with you.”

“Zeppelin. You gotta be a big boy and go to sleep. It’s midnight and way, way past bedtime,” said Jensen. He started to cry loudly and Jensen set him down. “Do you want a time out? I’ll give you one first thing in the morning if you don’t behave.”

He ran over to you and grabbed your leg, burying his face in it. Jensen sighed, tired after a long day and you knew he needed some sleep. You squatted down and Zeppelin grabbed at you, shaking a bit. You frowned, Jensen catching it as you picked up the little boy. 

“He can stay,” you said. Jensen made a face but you carried him into the room, Jensen grumbling to himself. You let Zeppelin crawl into the middle and immediately grab his father when Jensen got under the covers. He was asleep quickly, Jensen kissing the top of his head. “He’s scared.”

“He had a tantrum. He’s four,” whispered Jensen. “He needs to sleep on his own or he gets dependent.”

“You’re his father. He’s already dependent,” you whispered. “He’s a little you.”

“What’s that mean?”

“It means he missed his daddy and he has been the one telling his sisters for three weeks daddy’s coming home soon. I don’t care if he sleeps in our bed, Jensen. Sometimes he has to be a big boy but not tonight.”

“He was very...he’s very much me,” he said quietly, fixing the blankets over his son. “He’s in tune with other’s emotions.”

“I know,” you said. “He’s a sweet boy.”

“When I was a kid, around seven or so, my dad went out to LA for about two months for work. We didn’t have the money for him to fly back and forth so he drove out there. He would call every night but it was long distance and it was expensive back then so all I got to do was say hi to him really. Somewhere in the middle of the two months he drove back to visit for a weekend. I was so excited. So, so excited. I was gonna tell him all about school and my baseball games and the jumping contest my brother and I had on the swings. I was so pumped. He said he was gonna be there Saturday morning for breakfast. Well, I wake up, run downstairs, he’s not there. Lunch rolls around, he’s not there. Afternoon snack time rolls around…”

“He’s not there?” you asked, Jensen nodding. “What happened?”

“Never left LA. Got in a car accident. He was fine but this was the eighties and my mom didn’t get a phone call until the afternoon saying he wouldn’t be coming home. I thought a hundred million things in my head of why he wasn’t there. That achy pit in your stomach. When he finally came home a month later, I slept in their room, in their bed. That little achy feeling went away after that night. I know how much he’s like me,” he said, lightly running his fingers over Zeppelin’s head. “But I gave him that part of me too and I wish I hadn’t.”

“Why?”

“Because he’s too little to worry about me.”

“He’s okay and he’s not gonna worry after tonight. But Jensen, there’s nothing wrong with him having that part of you. It’s a really good part, the part that loves the people he cares about. Right now he doesn’t understand it but someday he will and that’s going to make him a person people will be fortunate to have in their lives. That’s a great part of you he got.”

“Just have to go and make me feel better, don’t you,” he said softly. He closed his eyes and smiled. “Think I’m doing an okay job at this?”

“Yup,” you said. Zeppelin turned over in his sleep, smashing his face into your arm. 

“You care for them,” said Jensen. You nodded and he burrowed down into the sheets. “Because of me or your job?”

“It always helps the job,” you said. “When you nanny, you want the kids to feel comfortable with you and caring about them always makes that easier. But I don’t...I don’t like them because I decided I liked their dad, you know?”

“Why did you then?”

“People with money sometimes let their children get raised by that money and you can tell when it happens. But it’s so obvious that doesn’t happen with them. They have nice toys and clothes and things but they’re good and funny and smart and they could very easily be brats if you went the easy route but you didn’t and it just shows. Sure they’re kids and they can drive anyone to the brink of insanity at times, but they got big hearts, especially for dad. I just like them and seeing them grow into those people more every day.”

“Me too,” he said, Zeppelin rolling back, fisting his hands into Jensen’s shirt this time. He smiled and you leaned over, kissing him goodnight, pecking one on Zeppelin’s head. “Night.”

“Night Jensen.”

The next afternoon when you arrived at Jared’s house you weren’t sure what you were expecting. Jared and Jensen were off doing who knew what and you felt like you’d been set up on a playdate yourself. You’d dropped off the kids there more than once already and knew their kids but for some reason or other you’d yet to meet Gen. You swallowed as you followed the kids around the side of the house, the three of them taking off to go play with their friends on a swing set. You looked around and bit your bottom lip, fixing your bag over your shoulder.

“Y/N?” called a voice. You turned and saw a woman behind you, a bit sweaty in some workout clothes. “Hey. I’m Gen. Nice to finally meet you.”

“Thanks. You too,” you said. 

“Come on,” she said, waving you to follow her up some steps to a patio. “Tom! JJ!”

“We know!” they shouted back from the swings. She shook her head and sighed.

“Not that any of the little ones can get over to the pool anyways but I want to remind them to keep an eye on the younger ones when I’m inside,” she said, showing you to a patio door. You followed her inside, Gen walking into a kitchen and going straight to the fridge, pulling out a bottle of cold water. 

“They have hair like their dad,” you said.

“Yes, yes they do. Getting them to get a haircut is like herding cats,” she said. She gulped down her water and let out a deep breath. “Do you mind if I shower quick? Time got away from me.”

“Yeah, no problem,” you said. 

“There’s a bathroom right around the corner there. Feel free to take whatever from the kitchen if you want. I’ll be back in ten,” she said. 

“No problem,” you said. When she was upstairs you went back outside, leaving your bag in a patio chair. You went down the steps and watched the kids running around for a moment before exploring their backyard. “Here I thought your backyard was nice Ackles.”

“Y/N, will you play tag with us?” asked Arrow from over in the grass.

“How could I say no to a face like that?”

Fifteen minutes later you were warm and taking a break under the patio again out of the sun, the kids playing on the slide and swings now.

“Remember when we had endless energy like that?” asked Gen as the back door opened. 

“Barely,” you said, a margarita glass set down in front of you. “I see we’re going to be very good friends.”

“It’s so hot out today,” she said, setting a pitcher and another glass down on the table. She poured you a glass and then herself one before taking a seat beside you. “I bet the boys are out jet skiing.”

“They really are like a pair of children when you get them together,” you said.

“Yeah but it’s cute. Most people don’t ever get to have a best friend like that,” she said. “Sometimes they need their space from each other but Jared’s literally been counting down the days until Jensen gets back.”

“I don’t think Jensen will ever stay away that long again. He missed his family and friends. Home,” you said. 

“We’re glad to have him back. He’s been gone for a while. Even before you went to Canada,” she said.

“Were you good friends with...” you asked, Gen nodding. “I’m sorry.”

“It sucked. Still does,” she said. “When the boys were off, we could hang out. We got very close. After the accident I was the one taking care of the kids, helping his parents and family with their day to day. Jared focused more on Jensen, helping him physically get back to normal and then mentally. But you know how he was when you met him.”

“I know a lot of work went into helping him get there. I’m very grateful he had you guys,” you said.

“Listen...I’m hoping we can be good friends too. It was different for me and Dee. We both were dating the boys around the same time, got married around the same time. I know we don’t have that and...I just hope we can have that relationship still.”

“Me too. I know we’re probably gonna be seeing you guys a lot now that neither of them are working,” you said.

“Probably most everyday,” she said. “They’re like twins separated at birth or something I swear.”

“Has Jensen always been a bit quiet?” you asked.

“Yeah. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve seen that boy drunk off his ass and being a troublemaker but he’s always been that way. Maybe it’s why he and Jared fit. They’re protective of each other in different ways. Jared’s the loud one out of the two of them, always has been and Jensen, even if he is your best fucking friend, sometimes he’s a little bit quiet.”

“I figured as much. He’s just…”

“Gentle,” she said, a smile coming to your face. “You two are pretty serious, huh.”

“Maybe.”

“It’s been five months. I’d say it’s serious. You move in yet?”

“Technically I’ve always been moved in,” you said. She laughed and took a sip of her drink. “Yeah. We’ve gotten to the sharing a room stage very recently.”

“You must be very special then,” she said. “He was never gonna fall in love ever again. Told Jared and me himself. Now he’s as lovestruck as the first time around.”

“I’m not expecting…” you said, sipping on your drink. “Don’t tell him I said that.”

“Like I said, we can be friends without the boys,” she said. “What aren’t you expecting?”

“This,” you said with a shrug. “Marriage. Kids of my own. I don’t know where it goes with Jensen.”

“You should start having those talks with him,” she said, your head shaking. “You have to, just so you’re on the same page.”

“I don’t even know if we’re reading the same book,” you said. She nodded and you slumped back into your seat. “I know I love him and that he loves me. But I don’t know if that’s enough.”

“A friend once told me that’s all you need,” said Jensen behind you. You turned around and Jensen was standing there, a sad smile on his face. “We wanted to come hang out with you guys. Y/N?”

You got a smile from Gen as you followed Jensen inside, Jared slipping past and out back. You crossed your arms and looked down, Jensen stepping close to you, large hands resting on your arms.

“Why don’t you think it’s enough?” he asked quietly.

“It is. Gen and I were just shooting the shit,” you said, forcing your gaze up. He slid his hand down and took one of yours, pulling you over to a quiet sitting room. He sat down on a day bed, you going with him. 

“Honey. Tell me the truth.” He ran his thumb over the back of your hand as you crossed your legs. “Did I do something?”

“No. You’re perfect,” you said, glancing down to your lap. “All I was saying was...I don’t know where you stand on some things.”

“Like what?” he asked, still smiling softly, hiding all of the nerves underneath it.

“Kids. Marriage. The fact your family has never once met me or knows I exist. Am I just gonna be the nanny girlfriend or is there something more? I love you. I fucking love and I don’t need or want...I just want to know if you’re open to those things.”

“I don’t know,” he said. You nodded and moved your hand back into your lap, Jensen letting go of it. “Is that a deal breaker?”

“No,” you said with a shake of your head. “Like I said, we were shooting the shit.”

You were both quiet before you stood, Jensen grabbing your hand. He pulled you back to sit, plopping you straight down in his lap before kissing you.

“Okay I do know but the answers fucking scare me,” he said. “I said I was gonna stop being scared when it came to you.”

“Jensen, you don’t have to-”

“Yes, I would have more kids if it were with the right person. Preferably sooner than later but yes. Yes, I would marry again. Yes, I would introduce her to my family and yes they do know about her. Not as much as I’d like but they do know her. And lastly yes, I am open to more than just the nanny girlfriend, so much fucking more. All of it more. But that scares me that almost a year later here I am, open to all of those things, wanting those things with you when losing Dee hurt so much. It’s not fair to you that this isn’t how it’s supposed to be, simple and normal and just the fun parts. I’m sorry.”

“I’m not asking you to stop loving her. God if you ever did, I don’t think you’d be the man I love. I just wanted to know if there’s room for a future in there maybe,” you said.

“You kinda got in there all on your own and I don’t want you to ever come out,” he said. 

“Ever?” you breathed out. “Cause that implies-”

“If someone’s gonna be that second person for me, I think…” he said, looking down. You rested your forehead against his, Jensen taking a deep breath. “I know you won’t wait for me forever to get my shit together.”

“Well, forever’s a long time. I can offer a few years at least?” you asked, Jensen laughing dryly. “What?”

“I don’t deserve a few years. Your emotions aren’t a toy to play with.”

“Yours aren’t something to drag along when they’re not ready.”

“See? You do that shit. You always do that fucking shit,” he said, his voice a few octaves higher. You wrapped him up in a hug, feeling a few drops of wetness hit your cheek. “I’m sorry.”

“For crying? Jesus Jens, it’s okay,” you said. “I promise it’s okay.”

“It’s not okay. I keep tossing you around like you don’t have feelings too, like this isn’t hard for you too. It’s always me and my fucking problems with just…”

“Just what honey,” you said, Jensen holding onto you tightly, chin resting on your shoulder. 

“I can’t,” he said.

“Why not?” you said, carding your fingers through his hair.

“I don’t want this to go away,” he mumbled out. “This is it and I feel like I’m gonna explode and-”

“Shush,” you said, wrapping your legs around his waist and squeezing his whole body as much as you could. He stilled briefly and calmed down some, sniffling to himself before you released to a gentler hold on him. “Just the anxiety talking.”

“I love you,” he said, lifting his head up, looking you straight on. “I want to marry you. I want to have kids with you and do everything with you. I’ve known those things for a very long time. Longer than you have and before you even thought of them as questions. I want all that and you’re gonna get stuck with me, with this, with the never ending baggage, with the baggage you haven’t even seen yet. All your life is gonna be is taking care of my ass and you getting hurt because of it. Is that what you want? Is it? Because I want so much fucking more for you than me.”

“Was that your proposal speech?” you asked calmly. He blinked a few times and narrowed his eyes.

“What? Y/N I-”

“Well you said you want to marry me and yeah, I fucking want to do that with you too so was that your speech?”

“What?” he asked so innocently you smiled. “I don’t…”

“I happen to like taking care of your ass. So. You want me gone, I’m gone. You want me to stay, I’m staying forever. What’s it gonna be?” you asked.

“Stay,” he said quietly with a nod. “Please don’t go away from us.”

“Okay,” you said. He leaned forward and kissed you, sniffling some more when he broke off. “Are you…”

“I can’t believe I just asked that while I’m covered in tears and snot,” he said. A box of tissues suddenly flung itself through the doorway, landing near your feet. You stared down at it and started to laugh, Jensen chuckling while you picked it up. “I’m never living that down.”

“Who gives a fuck,” you said. You took out a tissue and wiped off his face and eyes, having him blow his nose a few times. “That’s really gross.”

“I know.”

“Must be how you know it’s meant to be,” you said, wiping your hand off. 

“Stay forever?” he asked. 

“Yeah,” you said quietly. “Yeah that sounds good.”

“Me too,” he said. He pulled you into a hug and you held him tight, the door sneakily shutting on the two of you when it started to pour outside and you heard the backdoor. “I bet that’s how you imagined that going.”

“I never thought it would happen,” you said. “Not when I first came here. Love’s for other people. Normal people with normal families.”

“Fuck normal,” he said and you laughed. You picked up a clean tissue and licked it, wiping off a dried tear streak on his cheek. “I feel good.”

“We’re gonna work on that bottling shit up stuff, okay?” you said.

“Maybe you’ll have more success than Dee did,” he chuckled. 

“I’ll just have to build off what she started,” you said. He nodded and cupped your cheek as you finished cleaning him off. “There, all better.”

“Guess you’re out of a nanny job,” he said.

“Oh such a shame,” you said. “I’ve been putting my paychecks for the last while to a separate account.”

“I did notice that,” he said. “Saving for something?”

“Wanted to give it back to you.”

“Honeymoon fund instead?”

“Okay, now we’re talking,” you said with a laugh.

“You never did tell me how much your book deal got you.”

“I signed a multi-year deal. They think there’s great potential for it to be one of those series every kid reads. One million for around twenty books?”

“Fuck. You should be my agent if you can negotiate like that,” he said.

“I’m still gonna take care of them like I have been,” you said. 

“I know. It’s probably going to be a million times harder now actually,” he said. You nodded and he smiled. “You love them.”

“Yes but I don’t know how to be a parent.”

“Just do what you’ve been doing and it’ll be fine,” he said. “It’ll change but it’ll be good.”

“Not really how I was expecting today to go,” you said. 

“Me either. I had hoped for that to be a tad more romantic,” he said. You gave him a kiss and hug, Jensen returning it. “You don’t care.”

“Nah,” you said. “Just care about you. Everything else, I’m good.”

“Want to go share the news with our eavesdropper?” he asked. You helped him up to his feet and took his hand, walking out of the room, Jared and Gen suspiciously wiping down their kitchen counter. “Or should I say eavesdroppers.”

“We were concerned and I swear we left after Jared tossed the tissues in,” said Gen. Jared shook his head and pointed at her. “I swear he did it.”

“Guess you guys heard then,” said Jensen, giving you a smile. “We’re gonna give it a shot.”

“You okay?” asked Jared. Jensen nodded and squeezed your hand. “You sure?”

“I know what I want,” said Jensen. “I’ve known for a long time. Finally got over being scared is all.”

“She wasn’t gonna hurt you,” said Jared with a smile.

“I know. It was a different fear,” he said. 

“I’m not going anywhere,” you said. “Promise.”

“You better not, sweetheart.”

It was dark by the time the storms had passed, all three kids going down easy after spending most of the day running around the Padalecki house. You sat on the balcony off of Jensen’s bedroom in the oversized lounge chair, Jensen sat on the other side of the small side table your drink rested on.

“I’ve never been on a boat before,” you said, staring up at the dark night sky, the only light coming from a few string ones Jensen had turned on.

“Never?” asked Jensen. “Better wear your life jacket tomorrow then.”

“You better wear your life jacket,” you said. “We both know I’m a better swimmer than you.”

“You’re a better swimmer than me? Me?” he chuckled. “No way.”

“Put your money where your mouth is. Five bucks says I’m a better swimmer,” you said. He waved the way towards the door and you stood up, walking downstairs and outside.

“Uh, you missing something?” he chuckled. You smirked and pulled off your shirt and undid your jeans, shimming out of them and leaving them by the patio. “You really think…” 

“I really think what?” you said, tossing your bra at him, leaving your underwear behind. You jumped in and swam out to the deep end. “You’re already losing Jensen.”

“Losing my ass,” he said, taking off his shirt and jeans, nearly tripping as he hopped out of his boxer briefs. He jumped in nearby and swam over to you, dunking his head under briefly. “I could get used to this look.”

“Nothing you’ve not seen before.”

“Never seen my fiance naked before,” he grinned. You rolled your eyes but swam over and gave him a kiss. “I knew you had a thing for dorks you know.”

“Did you now?”

“Told me yourself. Not a fan of cocky guys I recall.”

“Well...a little cock is okay. Highly recommended in fact,” you said. 

“You are such a loser,” he laughed.

“I must have learned it from you.” You giggled and swam back to the shallow end, Jensen lazily chasing after. “I’ve never skinny dipped until just now actually.”

“Got anything on your bucket list you want to try out?” he asked. You shrugged and took a seat on a step, Jensen settling in next to you. “Naked trounce on the trampoline?”

“Maybe another time,” you said. You leaned back and looked up at the dark sky once more. He reached over and held your hand in the water, playing with it quietly. “Skydiving would be cool. Space would be cool.”

“One of those is a lot more feasible than the other. I noticed up in Canada where we had more stars at night you really like looking at them.”

“Did it a lot as a kid. Kinda always have,” you said. “I like space as much as the next gal but it’s just pretty, you know? You’re one little speck out in all of those stars. It’s all so freaking complex but you can kinda look up at them and it’s just so simple too.”

“Yeah,” he said, toying with a strand of hair floating in the water. “I get that.”

You turned and found him staring at you, a smile on his lips. 

“We could go camping sometime, see all the stars there are up there if you’d like,” he said.

“We don’t have to do that,” you said. 

“Why?” he asked quietly. “I’m curious is all. It seems like something you’d really enjoy seeing.”

“What purpose does it serve though? It’s not something fun for the kids to experience,” you said. “It’s a waste of money.”

“It doesn’t have to have a purpose. It’s for you, for us. A night away where you get to see something most people don’t ever get a chance. That’s the only purpose,” he said. “Camping’s about the cheapest thing you can do. Don’t worry about the money. You don’t have to worry about that ever again.”

“I just don’t want to go camping,” you said. You looked down and swallowed. “I used to go camping with my dad a lot.”

“Oh. I’m sorry.”

“You didn’t do that to me,” you said. “I just...I don’t think I ever want to go again.”

“Okay. Would you go camping with me sometime?” he asked. 

“Jensen-”

“Just me. No body else. I won’t even touch you except to cuddle,” he said. You nodded and he smiled. “Thank you. It won’t be scary this time. I promise.”

“Is your dad nice?” you asked. He leaned back against his elbows and nodded. “Does he know about me?”

“My parents know I have a girlfriend. My mom knows I was getting pretty serious about you,” he said. 

“Do they know I was the nanny? Or how old I am?”

“No. My siblings do but not my parents,” he said. You sat up and wrapped your arms around yourself in the warm night air. “I’m not embarrassed of you Y/N. I think that’s a conversation better had in person is all.”

“You haven’t told them because you think they’ll have a problem with it,” you said. 

“Not as much problem as when I say I’m not having a prenup,” he said. You turned your head and saw him smiling back. “I wouldn’t be doing this if I didn’t trust you completely.”

“Jensen I don’t want to cause a problem,” you said. He shook his head and you sighed. “I know how close you are with them and you haven’t gotten to see them since Christmas. I know exactly what they’re gonna think of me when they hear about the former nanny.”

“You don’t seem to understand yet that you? Nobody is more important than you and those three in there. If they can’t accept you then screw ‘em.”

“Jensen.”

“I’m not worried and you know why? I love you and you love me. I know they love me a whole lot too so you’re on the same side.”

“You’re a bad liar,” you said. He sat up and sighed. “Jens-”

“I don’t know how they’ll act. But you deserve a chance and that’s what I expect out of them. I want them to love you too but at a minimum you’ll have their respect.”

You nodded and sunk down in the warm water, Jensen sliding over and taking a seat on your lap, tossing his arms around your shoulders. 

“You still talk to Dee’s parents right?” you asked. He nodded and wrapped his legs loosely around your waist. “Do they…”

“No,” he said quietly. “They deserve for that to be an in person conversation too. They’re coming up soon for JJ’s birthday soon. I figured I’d tell them then.”

“I’m glad you still talk to them,” you said. “They still see you guys.”

“Christmas was hard last year. I’m not sure which one of us got it worse,” he said. 

“I’d like to meet them if that’s okay.”

“Yeah,” he breathed out. “I’m not sure how they’ll react honestly.”

“I’d still like to,” you said, stepping out into the water with him, Jensen hanging off of you. “If only you were this light normally I’d carry you around all day.”

“Didn’t we agree a long time ago you were the badass princess after all,” he said, bumping his nose against yours. 

“Here I thought you’d be taller,” you teased, quickly kissing him.

“Little shit,” he grinned. He nuzzled your cheek and you let out a deep breath. “Don’t worry about them.”

“At least we don’t have to go through this on my side,” you said.

“Can I ask one thing of you?”

“What?”

“Ray, your mom’s boyfriend, did things end badly between the two of you or you just drift apart? You said you left when you finished high school.”

“I stopped talking to him awhile ago. I moved out at 18 when I got my first nanny job. He was dating his wife Sarah by then. I’d come over for dinner every few months for a few years. By the time I was twenty one they were married with two kids. I didn’t go one time and kept putting it off and Ray told me it was okay if I didn’t want to see him anymore. I could call him if I ever needed him, that sort of thing. I haven’t spoken to him in nine years. But that’s not asking something of me, is it.”

“Can we consider inviting him to the wedding?”

“Been engaged eight hours and already planning?” you asked. 

“I don’t know him but he had a part in raising you. Just consider it is all I ask. And wedding? Those things take fucking forever to plan, trust me.”

“I’ll think about it,” you said, spinning him around in the water. “Are they really that complicated to put together?”

“Nah. Don’t go bridezilla on me is all,” he said. 

“Total diva over here,” you said, feeling the edge of the shallow end start to drop off with your foot. You spun around one more time before you had to set him down, Jensen taking the chance to pick you up and toss you out of of the water. “Jensen! I’m naked!”

“I know. It’s awesome,” he said, swimming out and kissing your cheek. “Wanna race?”

“Winner gets to do whatever they want to the loser when we head upstairs?” you grinned.

“Oh, you’re so on.”

______

A/N: Read Part 10 here!

[dumdumsun]

And Dusk

A/N: One of my favorites. Enjoy ❤️

Warnings: mentions of violence

Word Count: 2780

—————————————

Chapter 8: Tell Me, Muse

After an awkward-turned-heartfelt conversation between the reunited Allison and Luther about how good they were and the former’s marriage, the two slowly leaned away from each other on their own sides of the table. Allison decided to break the short silence between them. “Have you, um, heard from any of the others? Vanya?”

“Uh, on a farm,” Luther answered with raised brows. “And happy.”

Allison nodded, brows furrowed. “Right… Weird… Uh, Diego?”

“Nuthouse. Klaus?”

“Cult leader.”

“Eh,” He shrugged, Allison laughing aloud. “And, uh, Five turned up a few days ago. What about (Y/N)? You know anything about her?”

Allison froze, her mouth opening and closing. “I… I was hoping you’d know… Five doesn’t?”

“No, he hasn’t found her yet.” Luther’s expression saddened as Allison stared down at the table with a solemn look. “Hey… we’ll find her. She’s tough as nails. I’m sure she’s doing just fine.”

Allison glanced up at him, trying a smile. “Yeah… Yeah, I hope so…”

-------------------------------------------------

“I don’t see Dad anywhere.” Diego said as he, Lila and Five stood in the midst of the gala. Five turned to him, glass in his hand.

“Just keep an eye out for the Majestic Twelve. I got the upstairs,” When his brother turned away, Five caught his attention again. “Diego, try not to do anything too stupid.” He nodded before taking off, eliciting a soft chuckle from Lila.

Just as the boy ascended the stairs, (Y/N) and Preston had just passed the bottom to slip past Diego and Lila. Preston, after setting the girl’s drink down wherever, held her by the hand and led her to the middle of the dance floor. The two got into position before moving to the beat of the music. Preston tried more than once to steal a kiss, but she would lean away or turn her head in a different direction as if something caught her eye. To say he was getting frustrated was an understatement. She could tell by the quiet huffs through his nose.

“They’re playing our song.” Lila whispered before grabbing Diego by his tie, dragging him onto the dance floor. The only thing separating Diego and (Y/N) was an elderly couple dancing between them. But Diego was too immersed in his dance with Lila to notice his sister. He spun his ‘crazy lady’ around a couple times, causing her to grin. “You’ve got moves.”

“My father insisted on ballroom lessons,” Diego informed before horribly imitating Reginald. “‘One never knows when the paso doble will be the difference between life and death’,” He quoted before slowly dipping Lila. “‘Children’.”

“My mum used to say something along those lines.” Lila whispered, gently pushing his hair back.

“Yeah?” He smiled, eyes moving up when a blur of orange got his attention. He nearly dropped Lila onto the floor when they landed on the person who adorned that color.

“Preston, I don’t think you’ve even applied any of our lessons to our dance.” (Y/N) muttered to her date, who smirked and rolled his eyes. “And why does it seem like you don’t care? I kinda need for you to actually do something right so my dad won’t be on my ass after this.”

“Your dad is nowhere near.” Preston whispered, moving even closer. The girl scoffed and flicked his nose with her fingers. He gasped and hissed as he scrunched up his nose, but before he could scold her about her poor manners, she was pulled out of his hold. Milliseconds later, Lila was spun into Preston’s arms, the boy instinctively holding onto her so she wouldn’t fall. The two stared at each other in confusion and slight disgust as she slowly nodded.

“What a party.”

(Y/N) held onto whoever saved her from her unbearable date, her grip so tight that he softly hissed. Snapping her head up, she gasped at the sight of her brother staring at her with wide eyes and a bright smile. “Diego…”

“Hey, sis.” He wasted no time in crushing her into a hug. Happily laughing, she returned the comfort. Upon close inspection, Lila identified her target. And now she knew that she was important to Diego. The siblings naturally fell into a waltz that Diego flowed along nicely with.

“Look at you, big brother,” (Y/N) laughed. “Not so robotronic anymore, huh?”

He rolled his eyes. “Yeah, well, it’s been years since I’ve been your dance partner. I had to show you someday. How long have you been here? In Dallas?”

“Since late 1961. You?”

“Got here over two months ago. Shit, you’ve been here awhile… How are you holding up?”

“What do you think?” She chuckled and spun herself under his arm. He got a glimpse of her outfit and hummed.

“Not too bad, I see.” He became serious and leaned in closer. “(Y/N), listen to me, alright? Five was the last of us to get here-”

“Five?” (Y/N)’s steps stuttered a bit, but Diego got them back on beat. “You saw Five?”

He nodded. “But that’s not it. He told me-”

Diego was cut off yet again when (Y/N) was spun out of his hold, replaced by Lila. The woman simply shrugged and nodded towards Preston, who was now holding (Y/N) close and glaring at Diego. He returned the glare before Lila turned his chin so he was facing her. “She’s a little young for you, yeah?”

“What? No, gross. That’s my sister.” He shook his head. Lila raised her brows and led the two in a dance.

“A little sister? How cute…”

“She’s not as little as you think.” He chuckled. “There’s a lot of… interesting things about my family.”

“I didn’t notice.” She giggled, the two of them inching closer until their lips nearly grazed each other. Once again, a certain someone caught Diego’s eye, and Lila noticed. “Well, you are easily distracted.”

But he wasn’t listening to her. “It can’t be…” He whispered before slipping away from Lila, leaving her alone on the dance floor. His journey to Grace seemed to go in slow motion, the man slipping between bodies and clearing the path until she was all he saw. When she turned to him, he was transfixed. It was Grace. His mother who he shut off. “Mom…” He whispered, the woman giving him a look.

“Well, that isn’t the first time I’ve heard that,” Her Texas drawl threw him off a bit. Of course. This was the actual Grace. When Diego’s face dropped in realization, she became more perplexed. “Everything alright, hun?”

With a small smile, Diego stepped closer. “You’re real…”

Nervously chuckling, Grace shifted in her place, blinking rapidly. “If this is your idea of a come-on, it’s not goin’ well.”

“No,” Diego stuttered. “Uh, do… Do you know a… a man named Sir Reginald Hargreeves?” He questioned, crossing his arms.

“Reggie? He’s my date this evenin’.”

Diego raised his brows and widened his eyes. “Your date…?” His expression fell into disgust when Grace nodded in confirmation. At his grimace, she shook her head.

“Do you have a problem with that?”

“No. No, no, it’s… it’s just, uh… It’s just a lot to process. The… The thought of the two of you… I can’t picture that in my head. That is… That’s nasty.”

Sighing, Grace tried to make sense of this entire conversation. “You’re a little odd, aren’t you?”

“Yeah,” Diego smiled up at her, enjoying the sound of her soft laugh before his expression fell. “I mean no. Uh… Do you know where he is?”

“He said somethin’ about a quick meetin’, and he’d be right back. That was twenty minutes ago.”

Diego stared at her with a judging look. But not in judgment of her. “Never good to keep a lady waiting.”

“Tell him that if you find him.” Grace lifted her drink before walking past Diego. She was almost out of sight when he called out to her by her name. Not remembering giving it to him, she turned with guarded confusion. But he only gave her a gentle look.

“It was nice meeting you.”

“You, too.”

Meanwhile, (Y/N) had managed to slip away from Preston, making an excuse to head to the little girls’ room. Unbeknownst to him, she walked in the entire opposite direction, swiftly falling into step beside Lila. “Sorry about that whole switcheroo situation. My brother seems to think with anything but his head.”

“Yes, I noticed,” She smiled, reaching her hand out to shake. “I’m Lila.”

“(Y/N).” The girl shook her hand. Lila’s eyes scanned her up and down as she assessed her.

“My, my, you are cute, aren’t you?”

Thrown off a bit, (Y/N) chuckled and slowly took her hand back. “Thank you? So, how’d you and Diego meet?” She asked as the two of them linked arms.

“The asylum.”

“Lovely.”

-------------------------------------------------

Blinking into a closet inside the meeting room of the Majestic Twelve, Five adjusted his eyes to the darkness and peered in through the small space he had.

“The president is continuing to make inquiries into Roswell and the other crash sites, gentlemen,” One of the men spoke. “And, as you know, we cannot allow him to get his nose into our business.”

As he continued, Five noticed one of the Twelve delicately cleaning a monocle, urging the boy to lean in closer. “I’ve confirmed the motorcade will indeed be turning left on Elm Street. We’ll have our people in place.”

“Gentlemen,” The familiarity of the British accent startled Five for a mere second, but he only pressed himself closer. “This plan of yours seems ill-timed.”

“It’s going to be a turkey shoot.” Another of the Twelve commented just before Five had gotten too invested and unintentionally made noise with a hanger, causing the men to tense and whirl towards the closet. When the face of Sir Reginald Hargreeves came into view, Five could only stare in shock.

“Dad…?”

Reginald shushed the men and stalked towards the fireplace, grabbing one of the pokers and heading straight for the closet. Five and Reginald stood before each other in silence. One unknowing, one not. The next second, Reginald stabbed through the closet, intentionally trying to harm whoever was on the other side. When he opened the door, though, no one was there.

Five blinked into the hallway and exhaled, straightening his uniform before spinning around. Stood before him was one of the Swedish assassins. The boy cursed to himself before he was grabbed and thrown against the wall. Before he could be thrown into the other, he blinked through it and then behind the man, kicking him in the back of the knee and sending him to the ground. Five jumped onto his back and attempted to snap his neck, but the man was much stronger than the boy anticipated. So, he was flipped over and onto his back. Before the Swede could land a punch to his face, Five blinked behind him again. When he saw that he couldn’t successfully fight back, he tried again to blink, but the energy of his power only sputtered. Much like when he first arrived in the apocalypse. He was drained. When he looked up, the man was much closer than before. “Oh, shit…” The boy muttered before receiving a punch to the face.

In search of Lila, Diego rushed up the stairs and turned the corner, only to find his brother getting pummeled by one of the gunmen he had the pleasure of meeting during his asylum escape. Diego began to move towards Five, but was pulled back when a belt came around his throat and constricted his airway. He struggled with all his might, but his attacker did not relent. Moving to stand in front of him was the other gunman, now wearing brass knuckles on one of his hands. Rearing his arm back, he forcefully rammed the knuckles into Diego’s gut, then his face. Diego used his legs to kick the man away and send him to his knees. Taking out one of his knives, he launched it towards him, but it missed his target completely. He was focused enough on the third Swede continuing to choke him. Diego was dragged down the opposite end of the hall as Five, as the Swede with the brass knuckles landed his weapon on the poor man over and over.

Just in time, (Y/N) and Lila reached the hallway, both of them immediately turning in Diego’s direction. The young girl gasped and rushed to her brother without hesitation. Remembering her ‘side gig’, Lila quickly grabbed a hold of her arm, but turned in the opposite direction upon hearing a groan. Her eyes zeroed on Five being punched, kicked, thrown, and her mother’s voice rang in her head.

“Protect Number Five at all costs.”

So, she let (Y/N) go, the young girl never removing her gaze from her brother. The two females seemed to have had the same idea of kicking off their heels, but (Y/N) took her second one into her hand and launched the heel into the face of the man who was choking Diego. Her brother greedily took gulps of air into his lungs as she tackled the man to the ground. He was the shortest of the three, so he was the best she’d get to an equal opponent. (Y/N) sent punch after punch to his face, her small hands forcing themselves around his throat and squeezing. She watched as his reddened face began to pale the harder she squeezed, and right when she thought he’d pass out, he tangled their legs together and flipped them over. The back of her head hit the floor, a groan escaping her lips before she got her treatment right back to her. Lifting her by the throat, the Swede swung her around and pinned her to the wall.

“Eat shit and die…” She gasped out around his hand. He only clenched his jaw and slammed her head against the wall so hard she was beginning to see stars. Diego kicked his own opponent away before grabbing his sister’s attacker by the hair and tugging him back. Barely giving herself time to breathe, (Y/N) grabbed the shortest Swede by his suit lapels and, with all the force her worn-out body could muster, swung him into the wall. She heard a crack when the back of his head hit the wall, the man slumping to the floor. Turning to Diego, the two breathlessly smiled at each other before a voice called out.

“(Y/N)?! Honey, where are you? We need to go!”

“Shit.” She muttered before grabbing her heels and rushing down the stairs. When she reached the bottom, Preston was there to catch her before she could stumble down the last few steps. Silently, she dropped her heels to the ground and held onto him for balance as she slipped them on.

“(Y/N), what the hell happened to you? I thought you went to the bathroom.” Preston held her by the waist.

“Uh, I got lost?”

“Well, we’ve gotta go, your mom is worried sick.” He grabbed her hand and rushed them out of the building. Just after Five had looked away from the window where he’d spotted Grace and Reginald, (Y/N) and Preston had just been approaching said adults. Grace let go of Reginald’s hand and gasped aloud, hugging her daughter close.

“Where were you? We couldn’t find you anywhere, darlin’.”

(Y/N) quietly chuckled as her father guided them to their awaiting car. “I, uh… got lost leaving the bathroom.” She lied as Preston held the door open for her. The last person to get in the car was Reginald, but just when he opened the door, a familiar voice sounded.

He turned in the direction of someone calling out to him in Ancient Greek. (Y/N) sat up quickly and tried to look out of Preston’s window, but he was blocking her view. That voice…

“Reggie,” Grace sighed. “What are you waitin’ for? We need to go.”

Without another word, Reginald climbed inside the car beside Grace. As they drove away, (Y/N)’s eyes never strayed from Preston’s window. “Dad, who was that?”

“No one important.” He dismissed, but she didn’t give up yet.

“Why did he recite the Odyssey?”

“I’m not sure-”

“And in Ancient Greek?”

“(Y/N), my child,” Her father exasperatedly sighed. “I do not know. It is nothing for you to worry about. So, stop fretting.”

The girl clutched her dress in both her fists, harshly biting her lip. Because there were only so many people she knew, besides herself, who could recite Homer in Ancient Greek.

—————————————

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[fangirlsmood]

Tomioka Giyuu x reader - inferiority complex

Summary : Noticing how Giyuu doesn't know his own worth, you try to remedy his inferiority complex.

Warnings : Spoilers about Giyuu’s past.

author notes : Seeing our little Giyuu blame and put himself down breaks my heart, it's time for someone to comfort him and tell him what an amazing person he is.

_ Tomioka-san ! 

Hearing your voice, Giyuu stopped in his walk and turned to you, nodding his head to greet you. You noticed that he was holding a bunch of papers, probably a mission report he had to return to Oyakata-sama.

_ You’re already back ! After filing your report, would you accept ...

_ No.

_ But...

You've been begging him for a while to train you. He had saved you a few months ago from a demon and since then you had only one wish: to become like him. You were infinitely grateful to him and you were so admiring. Not really knowing how to fight but wanting to be useful you had started to help at the Butturfly estate. However you wanted to do more, you wanted to save people before they could get hurt like Giyuu had done for you.

_ Ask another person.

_ Kocho-san is already taking care of Kanao, Rengoku of his little brother ... Everyone else is too busy to spend time with me. I want you to train me... please.

He looked you straight in the eye for a moment then sighed, unable to resist your perseverence :

_ Fine. I will train you but don't expect me to be a good teacher.

Since that day Giyuu trained you every time he return from a mission. You couldn't be happier. The training was difficult, tiring and sometimes painful but for you it was an honor. Even if he didn’t said it Giyuu was proud to see your progress. Besides, it was nice for him to have company. 

•••••••••••

One day, at the end of a hashira meeting, Rengoku came to approach him.

_ Tomioka ! We don't see much anymore (Y/n) at the Butterfly estate. I heard that you train her.

 He nodded, Rengoku let out one of his loud laughs :

_ It's surprising ! I had offered to train her but she had refused. Is she doing well?

_ She’s not bad.

It was surprising indeed. You told him that no one was available to train you and he learned it was a lie. Why had you been lying to him? He didn't understand what you could gain from it.

••••••••••

That night he found you serving dinner for both of you like you did almost every day since you had become his student. 

_ Welcome home ! How was the meeting ?

_ Good.

His gaze immediately made you uncomfortable. Usually he always gave you a warm look, while now he was looking at you coldly, as if he had difficulty recognizing you. He took a seat in front of you and began to eat. After a heavy silence which weighed on him as well as on you, he decided to speak :

_ Why did you lie to me ?

You did not remember having committed such an act against him. Seeing your confused stare he developed his point :

_ Rengoku told me he offered to train you. Why did you tell me that no one has time for you ?

You didn't think he would find out someday. Nothing in his attitude or his voice let show anger but you knew he was necessarily upset. Giyuu was a man of his word and honor, for him a lie was a lack of respect. You were terribly ashamed, however, you manage to stammer an explanation :

_ Oh ! It’s not what you think ! In fact it is but... I mean I didn’t really thought about it... Believe me it was far from my intentions to disrespect you, I would have never offended you on purpose ! I just... I just wanted to be trained by you.

_ Rengoku is a really good and strong man. You should have accepted his proposal. 

He marked a pause.

_ Go back to him, if you ask him I think his offer still stands.

Was Giyuu denying you? Did he no longer want you as a student? He got up and turned his back to you as if to end this discussion but you got up in turn, you wanted to stay by his side: 

_ I don’t want anyone else to train me ! 

_ It would be better for you.  He will be able to take care of you and make you evolve. 

Suddenly you realized what was going on. Giyuu thought Rengoku was a better hashira than him. Didn't he know how strong he was too? You stood in front of him so you could look him in the eye, so he would know you weren't lying :

_ You’re strong too. And you’re a good professor. 

_ You don’t know what you’re talking about. I am stronger than you that’s all. 

_ You’re a hashira ! You’re one of the strongest !

He lowered his head you saw in his eyes, him who was usually so impassive, a hint of sadness.

_ I don't deserve this title. I shouldn't be there.

_ What do you mean ? 

You noticed that his hands tightened on his haori.The words struggled out of his throat, as if part of him wanted to hold them back while another wanted to get them out :

_  Those who owned the two parts of this haorie should be there, they should be alive. Them, not me.

It was the first time Giyuu had talked about his past. You kept silent, you didn't want to rush him. You just wanted to understand him, reassure him, make him feel surrounded. 

_ (Y/n)... I know you admire me and it's nice to have someone so dedicated by my side but you don't know everything. You idealize me. I am not a strong. I am not a good person.

One of his hand clenched the red part of his haorie :

_ I wasn’t strong enough to protect my sister...

His other hand clenched on the other part :

_ I shouldn't have passed the Demon Slayer exam ... Sabito should have, he was much stronger, much better in everything, but he protected me and it cost him his life.

You were speechless. Knowing that Giyuu, who was so generous, strong and usually impassive, had suffered so much broke your heart. You wanted to cry for him but you knew it would only cause drama. You will cry another day, now you needed to cheer up your beloved master.

_ Rengoku will know how to protect you, you will be safe with him. 

••••••••••

The next morning Giyuu couldn't find you anywhere. He assumed you had chosen to join Rengoku. He was sure it was the best option and it suited him for the moment. He felt ridiculous for confiding in you last night, and was too embarrassed to see you again. Nevertheless he had become so used to your presence that he already missed you. Part of him regretted telling you to leave. 

Fortunately you came back little less than a month after your departure and with a surprise. You ran to him yelling a "tomioka-san" as a greeting before handing him a package. A little taken aback he examined it for a moment. Impatient you pressed him a little : 

_   It's a gift for you! Open it !

He followed your instructions and found a nice little bundle of papers taht were of different sizes and different colors. The writings and the ink used were also diverse. You started to explain nervously :

_ I wanted you to know how amazing you are, so I asked the hashira, your old master and a few of the people you saved to write down what they liked about you or what you had did good for them ... Oyakata-sama and Gyomei-san could’nt write but they dictated to me and I transcribed everything ... I didn't think it would take so long to contact everyone, sorry ... 

He had already started to read. Everyone had written something even Obanai, Sanemi and Shinobu had found a few nice things to say. Shinobu had recounted a mission accomplished with Giyuu and admitted that without him it would have been a failure while Obanai and Sanemi were content to write a single sentence where they said that Giyuu was not "that bad" and that "some of these techniques were quite impressive". Urokodaki gently reprimand him so that he would stop always blaming himself and telling him that he was proud of him. 

And finally there was your letter. It was the longest and as he read it he wanted to cry with joy. He wondered what he had done to deserve so much praise, he wanted to deny all these compliments but you had written a real reasoning full of examples to support your words that he was obliged to recognize his qualities. 

He felt his heart melt. it must have taken so much effort from you to collect all these little words, it was a real treasure that you had just offered him. You watched him silently in his reading which lasted a long time and since he didn't say anything you wondered if it was really a good idea :

_ Erm... Do you like it ? It's okay if you don't, but keep them anyway. That way you could always reread them when you needed to ... you know ... know how amazing you are.

A smile covered his face and you noticed that his eyes were bright like a child who discovers the world. His smile was so faint you might not have noticed though it was the sweetest you've ever seen. 

_ Thank you. It's the nicest thing anyone's done for me. It must have taken a lot of effort from you to convince Obanai, Sanemi and Kocho and put it all together.

_ You deserve all the effort in the world.

You gave him a huge smile and he believed you. He felt all the weight he had on his heart, all his guilt shut up in the face of all these kind words. For the first time Giyuu told himself not only that he was lucky to have you by his side but also that he deserved to be happy. Every time he read one of the letters he said to himself, although it was still hard for him not to doubt it, that he was worthy. More than feeling worthy, he felt loved.

••••••••••

Navigation

[haitanirindo]

zukka fics that live in my head rent free! 

1. what did you bury before those hands pulled me from the earth (what were you digging) by draco_sollicitus status: complete (18k words) rating: mature pairing(s): sokka/zuko  summary: Sokka is immortal; it's been tested, he knows that he can't die. He's immortal, but he's not quite a god like his sister, Katara. He's immortal, but he's not quite powerful like his friends Aang and Toph. He's just sort of Sokka: good at fixing things, good at playing pranks, good at helping people. When a bet against Toph goes horribly wrong, and an attempt to save him goes even worse, Sokka finds himself the unwilling guest of the Lord of the Underworld. And, strangely enough, every story Sokka's heard about Lord Zuko seems to be ... completely wrong. (Also, he's really handsome. Why does he have to be handsome?)

mythology nerds come get y’all juice. a very good fic. 10/10

2. Where I Want to Be by through-the-stars-to-the-pavement status: WIP (83k words) rating: explicit pairing(s): sokka/zuko summary: "'The fog was where I wanted to be.'" Everything is different. The pitch of his voice, his posture. The auditorium goes silent. No one can take their eyes off of him.… He's amazing.  Zuko had to perfect the art of acting as a child to survive the horrors of his homelife. When he got older, it was only natural to take his talent to the stage for entertainment and escape. Enter Sokka, a craftsman and set designer with a giant heart who is haunted by plenty of ghosts of his own. A tale of trauma, disability, family, creativity, and love. 

this is one of my all time favorite fics. it’s seriously so good and i think about it often

3. Teaching a Heart by @i-write-shakespeare-not-disney status: WIP (114k words) rating: teen and up pairing(s): sokka/zuko summary: Sokka is asked to go to the Fire Nation to teach the crown prince how to sword fight. When he arrives, he's surprised to learn he has to pose as a companion before he can teach the stubborn prince because he rejects every teacher. Far from home and among new customs, Sokka struggles to gain the prince's trust and friendship despite the uncertainties of the customs and dynamics he sees. As he slowly finds answers to his questions, his bond with the prince grows until it becomes something far more ardent than friendship. Doomed as it may be with the prince's approaching wedding ceremony and coronation, Sokka and Zuko find themselves consumed by what they find in each other.

i have no words, i just love this fic and it makes me weep.

4. The Road Between Action and Inaction by @donvex status: complete (17k words) rating: teen and up pairing(s): sokka/zuko summary: Sokka does a shitty k turn in the parking lot across from the bus station, pulls up to the curb where the boy is looking determinedly at his phone, and rolls down the passenger window. “Hey! Which way were you going?” He may die, but at least his conscience will be clear. The guy blinks at him. “Don’t.” Oh, he’s prickly. Or: the hitchhiker au, featuring Sokka and Zuko falling in love without even realizing it.

a classic. roadtrip fics own my ass. 

5. purrfect for eachother by lesmiserablol status: complete (3k words) rating: general audiences pairing(s): sokka/zuko summary: “Let me teach you how to be a cat person,” Zuko says. “Learning from the master himself,” Sokka grins. “Alright, this can’t be too hard. Show me what you got.” (because sometimes, it takes going to a cat café four times to realize you're in love with your best friend)

this whole series is adorable, reading it is self care

6. Ashes Inside When You Finish Your Song by @muncaster status: complete (47k words) rating: teen and up pairing(s): sokka/zuko, aang/katara, mai/ty lee summary: Sokka writes lyrics for his sister’s band. Zuko plays piano and is unnecessarily nice. Fellas, is it gay to write love songs about your friend and his golden eyes? (AKA, a modern band AU featuring The Gaang, crappy software equipment, homoerotic lyrics, and the realization that maybe, if you think about a guy every night before you sleep, you just might be in love with him.)

i think this is the longest one-shot i’ve ever read and it’s so worth it

7. a study in matchmaking by @verdanthoney status: complete (12k words) rating: general audiences pairing(s): sokka/zuko, aang/katara, bato/hakoda summary: Zuko and Sokka try to play matchmaker, but things don't go exactly as planned.

this fic makes me want to scream, in the best way. it’s so cute

8. A Predictable Story by mindbending status: complete (7k words) rating: general audiences pairing(s): sokka/zuko summary: "On this night, you shall share a kiss with a great love of your life!” That lying, scummy Aunt Wu predicts a grand romance for Sokka. To disprove her "fortunetelling" once and for all, Sokka decides to spend the night with least romantic person he knows. Zuko.

again, i have no words. this fic is cute as hell

9. that’s murder, buddy by @bisexual-atla status: WIP (14k words) rating: teen and up pairing(s): sokka/zuko summary: Throughout the streets, on quiet nights, it was rumored the screams of those missing could be heard. Some say the sounds were coming from underground. Where were the young girls? And what was happening to them? Was an evil spirit haunting Gaoling, or something more human? More sinister? My name is Zuko, and you’re tuning into another episode of ‘That’s Murder, Buddy’. Or: Sokka has no idea that his crush is the host of his favorite podcast. (But everyone else knows.)

i love the entire concept of this one, we love oblivious sokka

10. We’ll play hide and seek (to turn this around) by @crosspin status: complete (5k words) rating: general audiences pairing(s): sokka/zuko, bato/hakoda summary: Sokka gave him a sheepish smile. “It’s…well, you see, there’s this boy…” Hakoda sighed and set down the sports section. This was going to take a while. “He works at Barnes & Noble. At the big information desk in the middle. Every Saturday. And I really want to ask him for his number, but it’s super awkward because there’s always this other guy working the information desk at the same time. He’s old, like you. But I have a plan." Sokka’s eyes lit up deviously. “You come with me to Barnes & Noble today when they’re working and distract the old man. And while you have him distracted, I’ll swoop in and get the goods!” Sokka has a plan to ask out the cute boy at the bookstore. Hakoda is a begrudging participant until he meets the boy's beautiful older coworker.

this fic!! this fic! adorable, incredible, magnificent

11. feels like we only go backwards by @oldpotatoe status: WIP (88k words) rating: teen and up pairing(s): sokka/zuko summary: [Time passes oddly. Between one second and the next, Sokka has the Fire Lord pinned to the wall with his hands around the bastard’s throat. Golden eyes (one gold eye, his mind whispers) widen in shock. “Sokka?” he chokes out. And then he smiles. What the fuck? “Sokka, I—” Sokka slams his head against the wall, once, twice, and the smile wipes off his face. Good. “What,” Sokka bites out, “have you done to my sister?”] Or: An injury leaves Sokka with amnesia. His last memory is of the failed invasion, of leaving his father behind in enemy territory on the Day of Black Sun. Of hopelessness. Rage. But then he wakes up, and the war is over. Suddenly, he must come to terms with the fact that years have passed, and that he's somehow the Southern Water Tribe Ambassador to the Fire Nation. He is also supposedly friends with banished-Prince-turned-Fire-Lord Zuko, of all people. Close friends. Yeah, nah.

if you’ve been following me for a while you know this fic fucks me up beyond belief

12. breakable heaven by @fruitysokka status: WIP (43k words) rating: teen and up pairing(s): sokka/zuko summary: With his twenty-first birthday looming just around the corner, the Southern Water Tribe Elders have decided that Sokka, next in line to be Chief, needs to get married. Sokka does not want that, but he does need to get them off his back until he can figure his way out of it. What better way to do that than to pretend to date his best friend (and newly minted Ambassador to the Southern Water Tribe) Zuko? Seriously, this is a foolproof plan. Maybe one of Sokka's best. Absolutely nothing can go wrong.

this just in: sokka and zuko being oblivious makes me want to yell

this turned out a bit longer than i expected but it also doesn’t even cover all my favorites. i had to stop somewhere, or i’d be here forever. maybe i’ll make a part two someday.

anyway, enjoy!

[tsrookie]

Always In My Heart

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr. Alyssa Brooks)

A/N: On today’s episode of ‘I have no idea wtf I’m doing’, we have something that I cooked up because I had terrible WiFi and no other app but Google docs would open up.

Trope: Fluff, but a tiny bit of angst?

Rating: General

Word Count: 2.3K

Warning(s): Mentions of character death

Summary: Their son has a very important question to ask.

——————————

The delicious aroma of chicken and rice wafted through the Brooks-Ramsey household. The couple worked side by side in the kitchen as they had all those years ago, the only difference being that it was now a dinner for five and not just two.

Allison Dolores Brooks-Ramsey came into their lives nine years ago, and while it was earlier than they would have wanted, they didn’t regret a second of their lives ever since they first heard her voice.

The twins on the other hand, were planned, but nothing had prepared them for the chaos that Nathan and Natalie would bring. A new broken object every week, a dozen fights for the TV every day, and yet were nothing short of tiny tornadoes when they joined forces.

It couldn’t be more perfect.

“What time did Jackie and Emilia say that they would bring the girls back?”

“6:30, I think.”

“Ah. So we have time till 7:00.” They shared a knowing smile. Two aunts taking their nine and six year old nieces to the mall meant a complete raid of the toy store, and a new guitar.

“You need to stop letting everyone spoil the girls just because you have a soft spot for them, Ethan. Ally’s grown old enough to understand that she has her daddy wrapped around her finger, and we don’t need Nat coming to that realisation as well.”

“I don’t- I can’t believe you would accuse me of not loving all my children equally!”, he exclaimed in mock offense.

“Mhmm. So why did I have to come up with an explanation to tell Nathan why his dad wasn’t on board with ordering dessert when he asked for it, but relented once his sisters kept bugging him for another five minutes?”

He opened his mouth in protest, but decided against saying anything for his own good. “Well what can I say? They’ve inherited their mother’s persuasiveness. And I can’t really say no to you, can I?”

Alyssa’s lips curved upwards at that. The playful look in her husband’s eyes caused her to finally break into a grin. “At least you’re self-aware.” Stuffing the rice into the bird she added, “But I can’t exactly tell our son that his dad is too in-love with his mom that he sees her in his daughters and hence can’t say no to them. He’d gag in disgust.”

He chuckled and wrapped his arms around her, resting his head in the crook of her neck. “That he would. Alright I’ll try a little harder to resist their charms. Wouldn’t want my only son to end up hating me.” He said it without a hint of worry over it becoming true someday. Over the years, he’d learned to put aside his fears of not being a good father, and with the help of some therapy, and Alyssa’s unwavering love and support, he’d locked up his insecurities in a box and let it sink to the bottom of the ocean.

They took the stuffed chicken and put it in the oven, washed their hands and plopped down on the couch for some rare downtime.

“Crap.”

“Everything okay?”

“Fred’s mom got called in, so she’s dropping Nate off on her way to work.”

Ethan sighed. “There goes the hour I planned to spend with my wife, who I barely get to spend enough time with these days.”

“I swear, you were never this busy when you were chief. I have no idea why my workload’s ten times bigger.”

“I do.” Ethan smiled with pride. “One usually does have a lot of work when they’re at the front lines of the battle for making free healthcare accessible for every single person in the country. My brilliant wife, though she could choose to leave most of the work to her very competent team, opts to take it all upon herself. So that’s probably the cause behind all the extra workload she complains about.”

She smirked and perched herself onto his lap. “Well your very brilliant wife also knows that you called my team very competent just to avoid hurting my feelings, and that you and I both know that they’ll be running around like headless chickens without me taking care of things.”

“I know, love. But you can still make them do a little more instead of working yourself to the bone while still making sure that you have at least one meal with the kids every day.”

She sighed. “Yeah, to make sure that they don’t forget what I look like.” She leaned in closer. “Besides, are we really going to spend our last few minutes of peace talking about work?”

Just as she uttered the words, the door burst open, and Nathan kicked off his shoes and jumped onto the couch as Alyssa slid down from Ethan’s lap. She shot him a look that very clearly meant What did I just say?

Ethan gave her an apologetic look and ruffled his son’s hair. “Hey buddy. How was your day at Fred’s? I know you wanted to spend more time with him.”

“I did, and we were just about to open his new LEGO set when Mrs. Watson told us that she had to run up to her office for some emergency meeting.”, he pouted. “But it was a nice day. We watched Thor: Ragnarok and Luca, and we would’ve watched another movie if his dad didn’t tell us that two movies were enough for a day.”

Alyssa shot him a mildly stern look. “Well he was right. You’re too young to have movie marathons just yet. Two are more than enough, unless you want to have a headache.”

“But mom, I’m not too young! I’m a big boy! I can swing along the monkey bars at the park faster than Natalie, and soon I’ll swing across buildings just like Spider-Man!”

“Well Spider-Man got bitten by a yucky spider before he swung across buildings. Do you want to be bitten by a gross and poisonous spider?”

“Mommy, not all spiders are gross and poisonous. Dad told me that when I was four and got scared of them at the zoo.”

She rolled her eyes. Leave it to her husband to convince her kids that insects were anything short of creepy and disgusting. In reality, they were, but as someone who ran a mile away at the sight of a butterfly, she wasn’t going to accept that.

“That’s right, Nate. Some of them are certainly very poisonous and dangerous, but that doesn’t mean that you should be scared of them. If you maintain your distance and admire them from afar, there should be no problem at all.”, he said with a pointed look at Alyssa, who just huffed in annoyance.

Nathan giggled, his brown eyes lighting up with amusement. He loved watching his parents playfully bicker. It was way better than seeing them- ugh, kiss.

“We were pretending to be superheroes and Fred used his full name for his pretend name cause it sounded cool, and it is. Fredrick Anthony Watson sounds like something from that show you and mom watch with the guys in the stuffy suits.”

“When did you see us watching the show with the guys in the stuffy suits?”, asked Ethan with a slight hint of concern. Whatever he and Alyssa watched on their free nights was definitely not kid-friendly.

“I don’t remember. Maybe a few months ago.”

Their year old puppy, Ivy, woke up from her nap and bounced into the living room to jump onto her favourite person. Nathan squealed with joy as the fluffy hair of the dog tickled his nose.

Ethan and Alyssa smiled at each other. Getting another dog after Jenner was a decision that took a lot of convincing, but their kids were responsible enough and it was impossible to say no after two years of constant pestering.

“Fred told me that he was named after his great-grandfather William, and that he was this really cool guy who saved a bunch of guys from getting mugged in a dark, dark alley.” He turned to look at his parents as Ivy snuggled into his lap. “Who was I named after mom?”

The question caught her off guard, and she glanced at Ethan for backup.

When they knew that they were having a boy, they immediately knew what to name him. They hadn't, however, anticipated Nathan Daniel Brooks-Ramsey to ask such a question this soon.

Seeing his wife at a loss for words, Ethan spoke up. “C’mere Nate.” He pulled him closer and pressed a kiss atop his head. “We once had a friend named Daniel. He worked at the hospital as a nurse, and he was close to your mom and Aunt Sienna when they were interns.”

Having found her voice, Alyssa joined in. “He was an amazing friend. He was the only nurse in the hospital who helped me out when things got messy, and cheered up Aunt Sienna when no one else could. He’d join us for picnics and movie nights, and you could always count on him if you needed something at the hospital.” She took a deep breath, and Ethan nodded. “Things were going well, but then in my second year, something really bad happened.”

“Oh no.”

“There was this bad guy, who wanted his revenge on another bad guy, and he was ready to risk his own life, and the lives of everyone around him to do so.”

“That’s horrible! Who would want to do something like that?”

Ethan smiled wistfully. “A lot of people in this world actually do. You’re a good person, so you know that it’s wrong. But some people aren’t, and they don’t care about other people getting hurt because of their actions. That night at the hospital, Danny tried to tell the bad guy that it was wrong, and to think things through. But he didn’t listen, and did something that hurt both himself, Danny, Uncle Raf, another friend of ours, and your mom.”

His little eyebrows creased with worry, Nathan asked, “What happened then?”

“He… he died. Along with our other friend, Bobby. Do you remember what we once told you about an autopsy?” Nathan nodded his head. “Well Danny asked for his body to be autopsied, and thanks to him, we were able to find out what was wrong with mom and Uncle Raf.”

He fell silent for a moment, remembering the horrors of the day, and how eternally grateful he was to Danny for being the reason he didn’t lose everything. He couldn’t imagine a life without the love of his life and his children, and he wouldn’t have either if not for the sacrifices that were made.

He looked up at Alyssa, and she squeezed his hand in support. “We’ll tell you more when you’re older, but to make it short, you’re named after a hero too. If it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t have you, your sisters, or mom here with me.”

Nathan wriggled out of his dad’s arms, and set Ivy down so he could hug his mom as tightly as he could.

“Well… if you can hear me Mr. Daniel, I just wanna thank you. Thanks for saving my mom. I love her so much and I’m so thankful that I got to meet her because of what you did. I wish I could’ve met you, you sound like a really cool person, and I’m sure you were. So yeah, thanks. A lot.”

Alyssa’s eyes glimmered with unshed tears, and she held her son as she expressed her silent thanks along with Ethan.

What they had was precious.

Fifteen years had passed since they first met, and yet each day they fell in love a little more like they did when they held hands for the first time in the dim light of the NICU watching over little Ethan, or when she finally got to see the real him the first time she visited his place; the first time in years he let someone know a little of the worries residing deep in his heart.

With all the odds against them, it was a miracle that they survived, even more so that they managed to raise three perfect children who had more love to share than they could ever comprehend.

And they’d never forget all the reasons that made it possible for them to survive.

Ding!

The timer on the oven went off, and they got to their feet to get the chicken.

“Was he a good cook dad?”

“I… don’t really know, Nate. Your mom knew him better than I did.”

“Well there was this one time where he helped Aunt Sienna bake an amazing cake, so I guess he knew his way around the kitchen.”, Alyssa recollected fondly. It was for Jackie’s birthday, one of the few nights where the competition was completely forgotten about.

Nathan’s face melted into a glowing smile. “I love cake. So I guess I really would’ve loved him.”

She mirrored his radiant expression. “You definitely would’ve.”

“Why don’t you go play with Ivy while mom and I get the food ready? You can help us with the dessert later.”

“We’re having dessert?!”

Ethan grinned at his son’s excitement. “You bet we are.”

“Yay!” They watched as Nathan ran off to go play fetch with Ivy in their enormous backyard.

Ethan pulled Alyssa in for a sweet, lingering kiss as soon as he was out of sight.

“You’ve been wanting to do that for a while now hmm?”

“Something like that.”, he murmured as they broke apart.

She could see the ever-increasing strands of silver in his brown hair, and the faint wrinkles along the sides of his forehead, but his clear blue eyes were just as loving and devoted as she remembered from over a decade ago.

“We have a pretty good life, don’t we?”

Ethan kissed her again. “No, we have the perfect life.”

——————————

A/N 2: Aaaand I’m going MIA again. Honestly though, to everyone who’s read so far, thank you so much for sticking around. Means the world💙

P.S: I finally chose Chyler Leigh as my face claim!

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[starksinthenorth]

Musings on ASOIAF Ladies and Ambition

I’ve noticed people use “ambition” to describe Sansa and Daenerys as if it’s a bad word or an insult (often called “power hungry”). Yet in the text of the series, neither of them are shown to be ambitious people as a core characteristic. I blame the series for a lot of this, because it failed to explore the internal dialogue of Sansa, Arya, and even Cersei, who ends up more humanized than either of them by the end (because of the maybe baby).

Cersei Lannister is the classic ambitious ASOIAF lady, whose point-of-view is introduced in perhaps the most iconic sentence of any introductory chapter:

She dreamt she sat the Iron Throne, high above them all.

I can’t think of a sentence in ASOIAF that better introduces the internal thoughts and view of its leading character.

In comparison, Sansa’s first sentence is receiving news about her father’s whereabouts, Daenerys is shown her new dress to meet Drogo, and Arya has crooked stitches again. Arya’s works to frame her relationship with Sansa and her internal struggle to fit the feminine Westerosi mold, while Sansa and Daenerys are setting up plot points. None of these interactions signal ambition, bad or good. Daenerys did not arrange her wedding, Sansa is just told the information by her Septa, and while Arya is aspiring to have straight stitches, that’s hardly an ambitious goal for a girl of nine.

Fans rarely, if ever, deny Cersei’s cruel, cold, often stupid ambition. In fact, it’s one of the reason people seem to love her. She’s internally open about what she wants - power - and when she wants it - now:

All of them are burning now, she told herself, savoring the thought. They are dead and burning, every one, with all their plots and schemes and betrayals. It is my day now. It is my castle and my kingdom.

- AFFC, Cersei III

The rule was hers; Cersei did not mean to give it up until Tommen came of age. I waited, so can he. I waited half my life. She had played the dutiful daughter, the blushing bride, the pliant wife. She had suffered . . . She had contended with Jon Arryn, Ned Stark, and her vile, treacherous, murderous dwarf brother, all the while promising herself that one day it would be her turn. If Margaery Tyrell thinks to cheat me of my hour in the sun, she had bloody well think again.

- AFFC, Cersei V

Cersei is the definition of a power hungry lady, scheming and cheating at every point. Yes, Sansa learned from her, but most of Sansa’s internalized lessons of Cersei’s were to do the exact opposite. 

"The night's first traitors," the queen [Cersei] said, "but not the last, I fear. . . . Another lesson you should learn, if you hope to sit beside my son. . . . The only way to keep your people loyal is to make certain they fear you more than they do the enemy."

"I will remember, Your Grace," said Sansa, though she had always heard that love was a surer route to the people's loyalty than fear. If I am ever a queen, I'll make them love me.

- ACOK, Sansa VI

Cersei isn’t the only POV character who views herself outside of conventional Westerosi standards and aspires to something beyond being a wife and mother. Arya Stark has ambition writ clear on the page, though it is not so cold or denying other people their rights or chances. Compared to Cersei, Arya doesn’t want everything, crown and throne and kingdom and all. She just wants something, and even that is denied to highborn women in Westeros. Even when she asks her father about her future, a man who wants to do right by his children and loves them, Eddard Stark is blinded by Westerosi patriarchy:

Arya cocked her head to one side. "Can I be a king's councillor and build castles and become the High Septon?"

"You," Ned said, kissing her lightly on the brow, "will marry a king and rule his castle, and your sons will be knights and princes and lords and, yes, perhaps even a High Septon."

- AGOT, Eddard V

With Arya in this, I see some parallels to Elaena Targaryen, who was so good at math and management she served as the secret Master of Coin while her husband carried the title. Elaena was “more willful than Rhaena, but not as beautiful as either of her sisters,” yet is also said to have been “more beautiful at age seventy than at age seventeen,” growing into herself like Arya is expected to. They both even cut their hair, Arya to hide her gender and Elaena to hide her beauty, both instances to gain freedom from captivity in the Red Keep.

Despite both these examples of ambition - Cersei’s all-encompassing, without care for how it affects the realm, and Arya’s attempt to find a place in the world outside the Westerosi model - it still becomes an insult when people speak of Daenerys and Sansa.

Critics claim Sansa is ambitious, and negatively so, because she “wants to be queen.” But this criticism misses a vital point of Sansa’s character. Unlike Cersei, she does not want to be queen because of the power and political influence, but because she will be living a song. In the start, Sansa’s got her head in the clouds, not to the dirty world of politics. Her very first chapter lays out this motivation incredibly clearly:

All she wanted was for things to be nice and pretty, the way they were in the songs.

When she thinks of Joffrey and being in love with him, it’s because he’s “handsome and gallant as any prince in the songs” (AGOT, Sansa II), 

Alternatively, it has been said that Sansa is ambitious because of her claim to Winterfell. But compare how Sansa thinks of her claim to how Big Walder Frey does. Despite being far down the inheritance line, he is certain he will someday possess the Twins. He’s likely willing to kill his family to become Lord of the Crossing, and already has killed Little Walder.

In comparison, Sansa isn’t the one who realizes her claim as heir to Winterfell, even after her two younger brothers are believed dead. It’s Dontos who mentions it, and after she still thinks that Robb will have sons to inherit.

But she had not forgotten his words, either. The heir to Winterfell, she would think as she lay abed at night. It's your claim they mean to wed. Sansa had grown up with three brothers. She never thought to have a claim, but with Bran and Rickon dead . . . It doesn't matter, there's still Robb, he's a man grown now, and soon he'll wed and have a son. Anyway, Willas Tyrell will have Highgarden, what would he want with Winterfell?

- ASOS, Sansa II

Sansa’s not ready to kill Bran and Rickon if they show up. Her arc is about taking off the rose-tinted glasses and seeing reality, but also working to make reality like a song. For example, her idea of the Tournament of the Winged Knights for Sweetrobin. It’s a song come to life, all by her making. TBD how the ending goes, of course, but it shows that trajectory.

And finally, Daenerys.

Daenerys is not driven by some lifelong desire to win and dominate. She’s forced into it, a la Brienne’s “no chance and no choice.” If Daenerys were raised in a stable environment, I have a feeling she’d be much more like Sansa: dreamy, hopeful, sweet and studious. Happy.

But instead, her eyes are open.

When she’s introduced as a character, she shows an awareness for the schemes and politics of the world. She knows her brother is called the Beggar King in the Free Cities, and is doubtful of the smallfolk’s secret toasts to Viserys III that Illyrio Mopatis claims happen across Westeros.

Like Sansa and Cersei, there’s evidence of her goals, hopes, and wishes in the very first chapter:

"I don't want to be his queen," she heard herself say in a small, thin voice. "Please, please, Viserys, I don't want to, I want to go home."

. . .

Dany had only meant their rooms in Illyrio's estate, no true home surely, though all they had, but her brother did not want to hear that. There was no home there for him. Even the big house with the red door had not been home for him.

Daenerys remembers home as the house with the red door in Braavos. It’s her brother whose only home and stability was the Red Keep, not her.

Throughout her journey of power to take back the Seven Kingdoms, she is doubtful at every turn and most of her wishes are for happiness, for peace, for stability.

Dany had no wish to reduce King's Landing to a blackened ruin full of unquiet ghosts. She had supped enough on tears. I want to make my kingdom beautiful, to fill it with fat men and pretty maids and laughing children. I want my people to smile when they see me ride by, the way Viserys said they smiled for my father.

- ACOK, Daenerys II

A queen I am, but my throne is made of burned bones, and it rests on quicksand. Without dragons, how could she hope to hold Meereen, much less win back Westeros?

- ADWD, Daenerys II

Even later, Daenerys is determined to bring peace to the lands she currently rules. She does plan to return to the Seven Kingdoms, but it’s not driven by pure ambition. And this is, notably, from a conversation when Prince Quentyn Nymeros Martell asks her to come back and claim them now, saying she has allies for that conquest. And still she turns him down, with promises that it will only happen eventually:

"Daenerys said. ". . . .One day I shall return to Westeros to claim my father's throne, and look to Dorne for help. But on this day the Yunkai'i have my city ringed in steel. I may die before I see my Seven Kingdoms. Hizdahr may die. Westeros may be swallowed by the waves."

- ADWD, Daenerys VII

And yet in both Sansa and Daenerys, these visions and hopes for the futures they might have are considered unbridled ambition, although they turn more on happiness and peace for themselves and their people, rather than the type of ambition Cersei has, which is clearly her own power and being heralded above everyone.

Daenerys’ thoughts in her sixth chapter of ADWD have the same energy as Sansa’s “I will make them love me.”:

"A queen must know the sufferings of her people."

. . .

A queen must listen to her people, Dany reminded herself. 

Daenerys has figured out how to make her people love her, by wearing her “floppy ears” and appealing to the masses, listening to them, et cetera. She’s also a bit ahead of Sansa in the realm of ruling, to be sure.

But how are these similar thoughts ambition in either of them? It’s an attempt to empathize and connect, not to throw away and disregard and rule by force and domination. Both these ladies are more nuanced, and the fandom does them a disservice by painting them as ambitious or power-hungry when at the end for both of them, it’s a desire to have a happy, stable, loving life.

[thepeakygurl]

Well I'm here. I wanted to tell you what a sucker I'm for some good fluff Tommy Shelby fluff..

I had this idea at the back of my mind where the Tommy married the reader as a formality because Polly had been constantly nagging him to get Charles a mother.(Like after Grace dies). Now he makes it clear that he cannot give her "love" and she should not expect it but she should be a dutiful wife (I know, patriarchy) and take care of Charlie. Reader decides to give the marriage a try.. and thinks it's not always love that builds marriage. As long as Tommy keeps her safe, it's fine.. It's only when the reader gets pregnant with Tommy's kid, the way her body starts changing, Tommy's heart starts changing as well and he starts falling in love with her as her pregnancy progresses..

I'm sorry if this is too much. 🙊🥺

A/N: I’m so in love with this one, I really, really hope you like it!🥺 thank you for requesting this amazing piece✨ honestly this one gave me so much life that I could wrote a whole series out of it!

Another Day

Thomas Shelby x Fem!Reader

Word count: 1,834

When Grace died, Thomas knew that a part of himself went with her. Part of his heart and his capacity of loving followed the woman who owned that same heart into the abyss of death. And he was fine with it, the only reasonable thing to do was to let his heart rest next to his beloved wife, that was alright with him.

Everyday that went by Thomas felt as his life were slowly drowning into a whirlwind of inconsolable sorrow. Nevertheless, he was trying his best for Charlie and he was darned proud of how such a sweet boy he happened to become. So mannered and so caring that sometimes he almost failed to believe he was his son, this was his only spiral of joy. Every time Ada would come around with Karl, Charlie wouldn’t help, but ask about his mommy and why him and daddy were always alone. And he was right, Thomas and Charlie were always going to be alone in a way, that thought was so dreadful and achingly painful that one morning he did what he had to do. Polly spent the last few weeks begging him to meet the daughter of this friends of hers, single and behaved, What more could you ask for? Polly would always end up saying. A question he would have promptly answer with Grace.

The first time he laid eyes on you, he couldn’t help but think how pretty you were. He was a man with pride, but he also had eyes and he would never say something that he doesn’t mean so he said it “You are a very beautiful woman” in a tone so cold and unemotional that made you laugh, clearly he was forced into this meeting as well. Marriage was the last thing in your list: Travel and study the art of painting that was your dream and see it being crushed by the economical need of your family almost crushed you a well. Being the respectful and obedient wife of Thomas Shelby was never part of your plan, but you weren’t selfish enough to say no and let your family sink in debt. And while Polly was taking your mom’s arm and pulling her aways from you two for some intimacy, you look at time a stare that he didn’t give back and said “Next time be more convincing.”

The wedding came soon enough, everyone on your side of the family was happy, excited and hopeful for the future that this union would bring. The Shelby’s on the other side, they weren’t allowed to celebrate as this wasn’t a marriage of love, but need. A small wedding, no reception. You never really thought about marriage, but somehow it made you sad how so careless this man was. How cruel he was to care so little about something that for you could have a meaning.

On the night of your wedding Thomas didn’t talking much, if anything at all. Some candles were lit on the side of the bed, they smelled nice you remember, but nothing could ease up the tension in that room. You in your night gown standing in front of him as he close the door behind him while he enters the room. His eyes locked in yours but it’s hard to tell whether he wants this or it’s just a duty. A step after another he finally was in front of you, so close that he could easily hear your heart racing on your chest. His hand slowly reached your cheek and he smiled a small imperceptible smile “Love is a tricky thing. From this night on I will respect you, protect you, but love...” he eyes were now somewhere else, they were still looking at you, but you could tell they were elsewhere. That was enough for you, or so you thought.

Time passed and the only thing that made those miserable day bearable was Charlie. You saw in him a lot of Thomas, but there was also a side of him that you didn’t quite get, probably from his mom. Grace a woman that was still an important presence in the house, in their life. Charlie would sometimes stare at the paint of him, Thomas and Grace and would point and her, asking where she is. You would then proceed to sit next to his and point at his chest close to where his heart his “She is here. She’s in here everyday, even if you don’t see her” you would say smiling at him. She was beautiful, so beautiful and so much loved that you would pity yourself, a resentment that caused you to be sickened by yourself, at some point in time you realised that you started to compete with the death and that feeling brought so much shame that you decided it was time to get back at your art. So you did, painting and looking after Charlie. When the Sun would disappear in order for the Moon to gloriously take its place, Thomas would come home, sometimes even later than that. He would kiss Charlie on the forehead, then he would smile at you. After all expectations, Thomas had no problem in engaging in a conversation with you, however he never talked to you as his wife, more like a newfound acquaintance and that again was alright with you.

Then one day you found out you were pregnant. You had all the signs, morning sickness, late period, body changing, but a part of you didn’t want it to be true. You were so afraid of bring to Earth a creature that was not made out of love that you took quite enough time to tell Thomas, the enough time it took you to start showing and made it impossible for you to hide it longer. Your heart was racing as fast as the horses that Thomas so much loved, when one night he grabbed you by your hand and pulled you closer to him, not a moment of love, but a need. And while a hand slowly caressed your arms, the other was finding his way under your night gown but stopped as soon as he felt your stomach. Surprised as it was he went from looking at your body to staring at your face, while you were nervously biting your lips “I’m pregnant” you said in a whisper. His hand fell down as soon as those words left your mouth and he quickly stepped back. He didn’t want another child, not like this, but he was not going to say it. In fact he didn’t say anything and went to bed.

Weeks after that Thomas didn’t touch you, or talked to you. He even barely looked at you. He felt as if he was betraying Grace, as this baby could bring an end to the connection he had with her. He wasn’t ready for any of that, but neither were you and so the hostility between you two grew. Charlie however was super excited to have a little brother or sister. Seeing his son so excited about the news made him think that maybe that was such a bad news, after all that’s what he wanted for the both of them, not being alone.

And the baby was growing, strong as ever. Polly and Ada started to come visit more and you liked that, that made you feel less alone.

“Don’t worry he will come along someday” Polly would always say to you and you would always smile repeating yourself that you didn’t need his love, that this was a marriage without love, but now with this baby inside you, you couldn’t help but thinking if he was ever going to love your baby.

Thomas was now at home more often “I do not have so many employees for nothing now eh?” He would say every time you would wake up in the morning and see him already on his feet preparing Charlie for the day. The truth was that Thomas knew you had trouble sleeping since the baby, he woke up sometimes during the night to see you walking around the room while moaning in pain. He knew how stressful it could be to not having enough sleep, carrying a baby and providing for another one, so he decided to stick around for a while. Seeing your daily routine, how you would play with Charlie, sit in front of the painting of hi late mom, telling him those kind word and seeing you meticulously give time to your own passion, that did something to him. Perhaps it was just time what he needed, perhaps love was something that he could feel again, because now every time he looked at you, he felt alive again.

“What now? Are you going to do the laundry as well?” You jokingly said while you were having breakfast.

He looked and you and chuckled “No, I pay other people to do that. But you are more than welcome to do it yourself, it’s money that I can save” and as he saw you rolling your eyes in response he smiled “I got you something” he said talking a little bag under the table and placing it in front of you.

You almost gasped in surprise, Thomas Shelby caring to waste a bit of his time to buy you something? Not even your birthday made him turn around like that. You were almost scolding yourself out loud for how much you were smiling at that gesture. You carefully opening the bag to reveal a pair of white baby shoes, the most precious thing he could ever get you. Thomas looked at you with the same big smile that was on your lips and he hold your hand, he didn’t say much after, but your hand on his meant something for the both of you.

You gave birth to the most beautiful and precious baby girl. Polly and Ada were at tears when they first saw her and you could tell to have seen even Arthur shredding some tears and being scolded by John. You even shredded some tears. The love that you thought you couldn’t get and that you were never going to experience, it was all there in this tiny little girl. Charlie was absolutely in love with her, so much that it was hard to convince him that he was to big to sleep in the crib with her. You were looking at your baby girl, sleeping peacefully and there it was, the most beautiful piece of art you ever made. While this thought slid through your mind, Thomas wrapped his arms around your waste in a hug from behind, resting his chin on your shoulder and he smiled looking at his daughter “So darned beautiful” he whispered while looking at her, he was completely astonished and happy, so darned happy. “You both are” he then said holding you a bit tighter than before and this time, you believed him.

[kim-miyeon]

Hell Above-Chapter Sixteen

PAIRINGS: Hwang Hyunjin x Female Reader

WARNINGS: Series contains mature content, read at your own discretion. Mafia!AU, explicit language, suggestive language, graphic scenes, weapons, murder, angst, 18+.

WORD COUNT: 5.7K

Previous | Next

Someday We’ll Tell Ourselves, “Oh My God, This Is Paradise”

“We’re doing it. It’s my call.” You said as you headed at the door, Hyunjin watched as you left.

“She can’t be serious.” Felix gawked and Seungmin enclasped his hands and he sighed.

“You know she is.”

“Is she always like that?” Changbin asked, looking at Hyunjin.

“Been like that for years, you can’t change her” Minho responded, eyeing at Changbin.

“She's as hard headed as the come. Minho knows more about that than you think.” Seungmin followed up.

“We have to figure out another way. She can’t risk her life for this.” Hyunjin spoke and Jisung huffed.

“The family is already fucked up,” he stated

“Jeongin would know what to do though.” Seungmin announced catching everyone’s attention. “Jeongin knows her better than any of us, including you.” Seungmin looked at Hyunjin and stressed his words. “

“He would know what to do and how to get her to change her mind.”

“Where is Jeongin?” Hyunjin asked softly.

“At the hospital after YOUR sister fucked him up.” Felix spat out aggressively earning a nudge from Minho.

“My sister and I are two different people…” Hyunjin stated and the room fell  to an awkward silence. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault” Minho reassured Hyunjin and Hyunjin nodded.

“but your sister fucking sucks” Minho followed up.

“Yeah no kidding” Felix agreed and Hyunjin chuckled as he looked at the boys who just smiled back at him.

“Hyunjin and I will go talk to Jeongin and we’ll figure out what to do. Don’t say anything to Y/N while we do that. We will report back later. Got it?” Minho ordered and the boys nodded their heads as Minho patted Hyunjin back as Hyunjin Let Minho take the lead towards the door.

Minho reached and grabbed the door of the hospital and Hyunjin walked in, Minho following behind. It was a silent place, almost eerie and the feeling of walking in and smelling the clean air made Hyunjin sick. He kept replaying what Felix had said about Yeji and that Jeongin and Y/N were close. That someone knew her better than him. No sense of jealousy, but almost sadness, that she had someone to confide in that wasn’t himself. And he couldn’t blame her. How do you talk about things with your significant other if it’s a secret that needs to be kept.  In the back of his mind its troubled him how well you played your role, never once breaking or exposing your raw truth. He was impressed. You have always been someone to impress him. You would amaze him in ways he never knew one could. So it hurt him to know that you must have been in pain, in agony, when the closest person to you ended up here.

“Can I ask..” Hyunjin began and Minho shifted his view to him.

“Yeji.. what. Um. Like what..”

“He had seven fractured ribs, damn near a broken spine, collapsed lung, broken shoulders from being hung.” Minho started and Hyunjin felt the pain run off of Minho’s tone.

“He was extremely dehydrated and malnourished and she kept him alive by injecting him adrenaline. His heart race was so high that the doctors believed he could have gone into cardiac arrest. And then the night we got him back and … everything happened…” the two walked slower until Minho stopped in his tracks.

“She shot him in his back. He had to undergo surgery four hours and retrieve the bullet and shards. It’s a miracle he’s alive.”

Hyunjin imagined it. That night he saw you in the basement. When everything changed, not only was she dealing with the pain of losing you but she was enduring the pain of losing her closest person.

“Jeongin is the youngest of us. And growing up, Y/N probably felt alone. I don’t know when but I know that those two are attached at the hip.”

Hyunjin smiled and Minho laughed a bit as they started to walk again and Minho shrugged.

“Don’t get too jealous Hyunjin. She still has a lot of love for you.” Minho reassured.

“I’m not jealous just, upset that you guys had to go through this. I feel responsible.” Hyunjin sighed and Minho nodded.

“It wasn’t your fault. You didn’t know what she was doing.” Minho said.

“I still don’t. It worries me that she’s constantly planning something. She’s a fucking parasite.” Hyunjin rolled his eyes and Minho laughed.

“Whatever she has up her sleeve, we will come back twice as hard against her.” The two walked up to the door and Minho knocked as Hyunjin grew nervous about meeting Jeongin.

“Minho!” Jeongin exclaimed as Minho stepped into the room. Then Hyunjin saw him. A small boy in his opinion, eyes sharp, resembling a cute fox. His dark hair over his eyes, and his skin was pale. He was sitting up on the bed watching tv and had just finished his dinner which was set on a tray next to him. Jeongin looked at Hyunjin and his eyes widened and Hyunjin got more anxious.

“Jeongin, this is Hyunjin.” Minho introduced and Jeongin smiled at Hyunjin.

“Nice to meet you Jeongin.” Hyunjin nodded at him.

“I’ve heard a lot about you.” Jeongin smiled and Hyunjin widened his eyes.

“You have?”

“Not all of it came from the documents.” Jeongin smiled while he spoke and Hyunjin smiled and thought about what it could have been that you shared. How many secrets did Jeongin know? What kinds of things did you express to him?

“She loves you a lot. Thank you for taking care of her.

Hyunjin snapped out of his mind when he heard Jeongin speaking to him. Hyunjin smiled softly before Jeongin turned his attention to look at Minho.

“What’s going on?”

“Grandfather ordered an execution on Y/N for treason.” Minho stated and Jeongin pursed his lips with little shock in his face.

“Cause she’s pregnant..”

“Yeah.”

“And I bet she came up with a ridiculous plan too.” Jeongin stated earning a surprised looked from Minho and Hyunjin stepped a bit closer.

“She wants to use a tranquilizing bullet to slow her heart rate down enough to wear grandfather believes she is dead.” Hyunjin said and Jeongin bit his lip.

“And she wants Minho to pull the trigger.” Jeongin finished and Minho looked at him as he nodded slowly.

“Are you?” Jeongin asked.

“I can’t. There’s no guarantee that the bullet won’t kill her and her baby.”

“She really over complicates everything.” Jeongin crossed his arms over his chest.

“We need you to talk to her. And convince her not to go down this route.” Minho demanded and Jeongin furrowed his brows.

“Why me?”

“Unfortunately you’re the only one she will listen to. If I tell her it’s not enough.”

“If I try to convince her to not go through with it.. what would be the other route.” Jeongin sat forward.

“We don’t know. We have to think about it.”

Hyunjin watched the pause over the room. The silence that consumed the two. He watched as Jeongin was struggling to say something as Minho paced slowly around the hospital room.

“Minho.” Jeongin softly said.

“Yeah?”

“Maybe the gun shouldn’t be pointed at Y/N.”

Hyunjin looked over at Minho who looked at Jeongin in confusion.

“What do you mean?”

“Maybe we should be aiming our weapons at someone else.”

Hyunjin thought about Jeongin’s words. He pondered through them until he knew what Jeongin meant. Until everything made sense.

“Your grandfather.” Hyunjin softly said and Minho looked at him and then shook his head.

“Jeongin we can’t kill grandfather.” Minho walked closer to the bed.

“Can't.. or won’t?” Jeongin tested.

“Huh?.” Minho flinched back lightly.

“Look at me Minho and tell me you really believe that grandfather shouldn’t be the one on his knees begging for mercy. Tell me you don’t believe he hasn’t committed treason.” Jeongin sternly said and Minho stood there and looked down at the floor.

“Think about it. He almost killed his own blood.” Jeongin pointed to himself.

“He did kill his own blood.” Hyunjin interjected and Jeongin turned his head softly.

“Killing grandfather could mean a whole world of danger . Not just to Y/N...but all of us.” Minho said almost mumbling through his teeth.

“So the risk scares you?” Jeongin asked.

“Putting you all in danger scares me” Minho looked back up and snapped back at Jeongin.

“Minho. You had too many chances to defend Y/N in her time of need. This is your last chance.” Minho looked at Jeongin for a short period and felt his words. But inside he knew the consequences, he could feel the future, and he couldn’t bear to watch any of his family die. Not even you.

“Convive Y/N to change her mind, Jeongin. Hyunjin and I will figure out a plan.” Minho said as he headed out the door leaving Hyunjin there with Jeongin.

Jeongin sighed as he looked down at his hands and bit his lip.

“Whenever she spoke about you..”

Hyunjin looked up at Jeongin and Jeongin looked back up at him and continued.

“There was always a twinkle in her eye, and a smile on her face. She radiated a room when you were brought up. It was intoxicating.”

Hyunjin smiled a bit imagining you in that moment. How you always lit up a room. How your eyes shined beautiful and smiled like an angel.

“She loves you Hyunjin. More than anything. And I know you feel the same way. Don’t let her go through with this.” Jeongin stated and Hyunjin felt Jeongin’s voice darken and his next words left a shiver down Hyunjin’s spine.

“The only way out is through.”

********************************************************

The night was eerily peaceful as Hyunjin looked out the window from the bedroom replaying Jeongin’s words.

“The only way out is through.”

Hyunjin remembered the same words spoken from his father, and how it made him feel and what he finally understood of it.

After you and Minho left the room Hyunjin looked at his father who groaned as he shoved his hands into his pockets.

“She’s pregnant.”

Hyunjin’s eyes widened with fear and he felt his whole body run ice cold. His heart beat racing and beating so loudly he could hear the pounding in his ears.

“How did you know?

“I can see it.” Hyunjin’s father smiled and Hyunjin felt the once cold rush turn warm. “She has the same glow about her the way your mother did when she was pregnant with you and Yeji.”

Hyunjin watched his father Internally deciding how to move forward and what to say.

“I am grateful to her for sparing your life Hyunjin. She’s incredibly trained and I know she didn’t have to.” Hyunjin’s father somberly said.

“Is that why you are helping us?” Hyunjin asked and his father sighed.

“I can only help you so much. The network, the organization of underground leaders, would have me at the stake if they knew I was handing out information like this.” Hyunjin knew that the mafia leaders couldn’t disappoint or go against the men who fed them.he knew the network was the way we received our riches and gold. The ones who did the dirty work so that the me above could shine. It was a dangerous game, and you never knew if someone close to you was a part of them. Hyunjin’s father could be dead within seconds if someone found out.

“You love her a lot, don’t you?” Hyunjin didn’t know how to answer his father, but he was tired of lying and tired of meeting a middle ground.

“More than anything in this world Father. She is my other half and I want to raise this child with her. I want to live a normal life with this woman.”

“Then the only way out Hyunjin is through.”

“What do you mean?” Hyunjin scrunched his brows and his father nodded to himself.

“If you want to spend the rest of your life with her and your child, in peace, you cannot avoid the obstacles that stand in your way.”

Hyunjin stood there rather confused as his father watched him trying to uncover a riddle that he handed to his son. Hyunjin looking stunned as he was deciding what his father meant but his father clears his throat and pull him back into reality

“Go on. I have to continue my work.”

Hyunjin nodded softly and turned towards the door.

“Hyunjin..” Hyunjin turned around to his father and his father sighed.

“Be safe.”

You rose up from the bed and began wheezing and your body frailed and Hyunjin ran from the window over to you. Your hair and body was wet from sweat and you had tears streaming down your face. Your body was burning to the touch as Hyunjin wrapped his arms around you.

“Hey hey hey” Hyunjin cooed as you wheezed and Hyunjin looked at your face and grabbed it and looked into your eyes. Bone chilling fear “Y/N. Look at me.”

You found Hyunjins orbs and locked in with him as he helped you breathe in and out slowly. He began to feel you come down from your high and you looked down at his arms and chest that were around you.

“You’re okay.” He pulled you into him and you laid on his chest, crying.

“What happened ? Hyunjin asked stroking your hair and you sniffled

“A bad dream..I can’t remember..” you stuttered through your choked tears and Hyunjin comforted you

“Hey shush. I’m right here, love. Nothing bad is going to happen. Everything will be okay.”

********************************************************

“Here it is”

“So tell me, when Minho shoots it-“ You started and Changbin cut you off.

“It will break the skin, it will hurt, especially if he is rather close to you. I made this protection pad for you to wear..”  Changbin handed to the padding and you eyed it a bit before he continued.

“This should help stop the force of the bullet from completely killing you”

“YAH!” Hyunjin yelled more as a warning to be careful with the words people used. He was on edge with the whole situation.

“Hyunjin it ‘s fine. It won’t kill me. We just need it to put me out for a few, make grandfather believe I am dead.” You looked at him before turning to Changbin, “Thank you Changbin.”

Hyunjin clenched his jaw and left the room as you tried to grab on to his arm as he jerked you off.

“Hyunjin—“

You followed after him and you two were in the hallway when you called out his name again and grabbed him as he  turned to you.

“This is ridiculous Y/N putting yourself at danger! Putting everything on the line like this. If he thinks you're dead, what difference does it make!?”

“He hid me from the world. He made me non existent. Do you know that you could have been dead years ago!? That’s why.” You retorted and Hyunjin sighed out in frustration.

“I’m playing the same game as him, Hyunjin. Making myself non existent. For me, for you…” You grabbed his hand and placed it over your stomach, “for our family.”

Hyunjin pulled you into a hug and held you tightly, like he was going to lose you .“I just can’t bear to think of something happens, if you-“

“Nothing will happen, I promise. I trust Minho. I trust the plan.”

Hyunjin looked at you with little confidence as you perched yourself up to place a kiss on his lips. Pulling back you still saw the worrying in his eyes and you placed your hand on his cheek.

“I’m going to go back to talk to Changbin some more.” You smiled and you turned to leave and Hyunjin watched you walk away.

He ran his hands through his hair and face. He sighed and looked down reaching into his pants to grab his phone. The words of not only his father but Jeongin kept playing and Hyunjin began to believe that they were right. You can’t go through with this. He wouldn’t allow it.

He hit the dial button on his phone and raised it to his ear hearing the sounds of the ringing go through.

“Hello?” The voice of the man came through.

“Meet me at the intersection. Tonight.”

*******************************************************

Hyunjin sat at the bar, twirling the ice in his drink. He heard the sound of the door opening behind and grabbed the glass and took a sip of the liquor.

“Bourbon. Straight.” Hyunjin looked over as Minho took a seat down next to him.

“You called me rather late. What’s going on?”

“The only way out of through.” Hyunjin said and Minho looked at him confused.

“Huh”

“That’s what my father said to me when we left his office the other day, talking about your grandfather.” Minho’s drink slid over to him and he looked at it. Grabbing the glass as he remembered the day you three went to the Hwang mansion.

“What does he mean by that”

“Jeongin asked you, can you kill your grandfather?” Minho sat his glass down and looked at Hyunjin.

“You can’t be serious.”

“Can you?” Hyunjin reiterated.

“Hyunjin you don’t understand. Murdering that man would set a domino effect in the leadership. The network for us is incredibly powerful. Killing our grandfather would be a means of war, he leads the network for the family. No one knows that but me.” Minho turned and explained.

“We can’t avoid him.” Hyunjin pressured and Minho groaned as he looked away in frustration. Hyunjin continued

“Tell me that you believe if we play his game and hide Y/N he won’t find her. He won’t track her down? He won’t be suspicious? Tell me you really think that your grandfather wouldn’t catch on.”

“My family is my priority.” Minho stated.

“We’re family Minho. My child is your family. And our family is in danger.” Hyunjin pleaded and Minho looked back at his drink as he sighed heavily. There was silence that laid over the two before Minho spoke up again.

“I don’t expect you to know this. But, I have lived with guilt my whole life. He’s hurt her Hyunjin, in the worst of  ways. And I knew. Every goddamn time he took her to his office. She would be covered in bruises and cuts. She would cry every night and I would hear her. She needed me Hyunjin and I let her down time and time again. I never did anything.”

Hyunjin reflected Minho’s words. Things he never knew about you. All the years and all the deep dark moments you could never share. It saddened Hyunjin. He wished he could have held you in those hard times and every moment when you needed him more. But how could he have known?

“The only way out is through.” Minho said to himself bringing Hyunjin back.

“Can you kill him?” Hyunjin asked desperately.

“I can but..”

“But what?” Hyunjin cut Minho off and Minho was deep in thought.

“We have to catch him off guard. And Y/N can’t know.”

“Wouldn't she want him dead?” Hyunjin asked confused as to why you couldn’t know.

“She doesn’t realize it, but in the back of her mind, she has an attachment to him. One that she can’t break on her own.”

Hyunjin sat back and sighed and Minho continued to explain.

“He raised her, and made her who she is. No matter how much she may think she hates him, she can’t see a life where he is dead.”

“She gave me this by the way….” Minho reached in the back of his pocket and pulled out the note you had handed Minho a while ago for Hyunjin. He handed it to Hyunjin who took it and opened it up. Hyunjin’s eyes scanned over the words you had written. He felt his heart quench and his eyes grew hot and watery. It was a painful letter. It was painful for Hyunjin.

“She’s prepared to die..” Hyunjin whispered to himself and Minho clasped his hands and breathed out deeply.

“I will kill him, but Hyunjin when I take that shot…” Minho paused and Hyunjin turned his head.

“It’s war.”

********************************************************

Hyunjin grabbed the files off his desk and he walked over to the cabinet and placed the files in it. He heard the door of his office open and close and he turned around to find Chan standing there with sadden eyes, very tense demeanor.

“What are you doing here?” Hyunjin spat and walked towards his desk not looking at Chan.

“I came here to talk.” Chan took a step closer and Hyunjin snapped.

“I don’t want to talk to you.”

“Hyunjin please listen.” Chan pleaded.

“No.” Hyunjin grabbed his suit jacket off his chair and began throwing it over his arms.

“Changbin told me about Y/N.” Hyunjin paused and turned to Chan and grabbed his gun and held it in his hand defensively.

“What did he tell you?” Hyunjin spoke clenching his jaw.

“That she’s pregnant ..” Hyunjin gripped his gun tighter and Chan looked at his hand.

“And in danger.”

Hyunjin began fuming and looked at Chan intensely until Chan sighed and kept talking.

“Hyunjin, helping Yeji my… that was selfish of me and I know you don’t forgive me but—“

“ I haven’t forgiven you Chan.” Hyunjin interjected.

“I’m sorry..” Chan began to let a few tears fall from his face softly.

“I want to set things right for you, for her, for..” Hyunjin looked at Chan and Chan shrugged sadly.

“Your baby.”

“How do I know I can trust you? How do I know this isn’t a set up and you’re gonna tell Yeji the plan or that you’re not working with Y/N grandfather?” Hyunjin through his gun up at Chan and Chan put his hands up in surrender as Hyunjin accused.

“I can’t ask you to trust me, I know I lost that from you.”

Hyunjin looked at Chan and felt broken. But the part of him that felt betrayed would let the gun come down.

“There’s a shelter.. a little home…. off the grid.” Hyunjin lowered his gun a bit as Chan was speaking.

“It was a place my father created in case he had to hide my family. It’s never been used.”

“Who knows about it?” Hyunjin stood back and withdrew his weapon.

“Only me. And now you.”

Hyunjin paused and took a deep breath as Chan lowered his hands.

“You can take her there, and you can have your baby there. It’s a good place Hyunjin. No one will find you.”

“Unless you tell someone.” Hyunjin muttered.

“I won’t.” Chan reassured and Hyunjin shook his head, “I don’t expect you to trust my word but I hope you take the offer. It’s the least I could do after everything.”

“Chan.” Hyunjin spoke and Chan stopped talking to let Hyunjin speak.

“Come with us. Come fight with us. Defend us. And then, I can trust you.” ********************************************************

Hyunjin and you sat in the car. He looked at you the whole time and watched you as you shook your leg and bit your thumb. You were anxious, nervous. It was today and Hyunjin knew it. He knew how it would all end. Your mind was so preoccupied with the what if’s and the unknowns you couldn’t find peace. Hyunjin wanted to take your hand and just tell you everything will be fine. Tell you that it will all be over. But it was a lie. You two were going to be fine and safe, but not forever. This didn’t end tonight, it was beginning.

I’m going in.” You unbuckle your seat belt and looked at Hyunjin. Hyunjin slid his hand over your cheek and behind your head as he pulled you into a kiss, one that felt so passionate, full of love, fear, lust. Like it was the last time you two would ever feel each other. He wanted to savor this peaceful moment one more time. He wanted you to know he was here in every way.

“Y/N” Hyunjin whispered against your lips. Your name brought him security and safety. You were everything he ever needed in his life and once you left that vehicle, nothing would be the same. But he needed you to know how he felt at that moment. Two souls as one.

“I love you.” Hyunjin said and you looked into his eyes. He didn’t want you to leave the car but you had to. You smiled softly at him.

You got out and shut the door as you began walking into the hospital. Hyunjin watched you to make sure you got inside before he saw a few black cars pull up next to the building. Hyunjin knew immediately that they had to be inside. They were waiting for her. Hyunjin started the car and began driving off to warn the others.

“They took her.”  Hyunjin bursted into the office and Minho jolted up out of his seat as he turned to Felix who looked back at him.

“It’s time.” Minho said and Felix nodded and got up and grabbed his jacket.

“Let’s go fuck shit up.” Felix said and left the room, heading to go round up the other boys.

Hyunjin stood there across from Minho as Minho looked back at him.

“So we are really doing this?” Hyunjin asked and Minho nodded his head.

“Better late than never.” Minho scoffed to himself and Hyunjin nodded as they both left the room.

“CARS READY.” Felix shouted by and Hyunjin found Minho's gun and grabbed it.

“You may need that.” Hyunjin laughed as he handed it to Minho. Minho looked at Hyunjin with a serious face.

“Remember, as soon as I fire that bullet.” Minho started.

“Get her out of there.” Hyunjin finished.

“Whatever happens Hyunjin. Please protect her.” Minho placed his hand on Hyunjin’s shoulder and Hyunjin nodded.

“With my life.”

********************************************************

“All three of you. In one vicinity. How delightful it is to see such a scene, and how pathetic it is to see the son of Hyun-woo sacrificing his life yet again for a woman.” Hyunjin clenched his jaw as he looked at you and you stared back. He was hard to read, something that never was difficult before. He looked busy in his mind, thinking about something deeply. You turned to Minho and he looked down at you as you tried to read him. Blank. You felt your heartbeat quicken and the pit of your stomach felt light. Where were they? Why were they not with you?

“Since I have you three here, I might as well use this to my advantage.” your grandfather stepped closer and looked at Minho.

“Shoot her.”

“Don’t you dare.” Hyunjin growled.

“Shoot her Minho.”

“Minho I swear to god, don’t you dare pull that trigger.”

“No?” Your grandfather looked at Hyunjin and he smiled at him. “ Then you pull it Hyunjin. Pull yours.”

You looked at the scene and felt tears brim your eyes. Nothing felt right and this was not the plan. You looked to Hyunjin and then Minho. Minho began to shake and you pleaded with your eyes.

“I don’t care who pulls the trigger, it means nothing to me. One of you has to die anyways…”

Those words sent chills down your spine. No matter the outcome, your grandfather felt no remorse if anyone were to die. It was painful, but not shocking. He ordered the death of your family and has no sense of guilt for what he has done. You bit your lip and almost felt like the plan would have caused nothing but more anger and pain. So maybe you would be okay if Minho pulled the trigger. Maybe this was the best thing for everyone.

“You heard him Y/N.” Minho said softly and you looked at him in fear as he cocked his gun back and you saw the light escape his eyes, full blown rage.

“One of us has to die.”

You closed your eyes, letting a tear run down your cheek as you heard the sound of the gun fire off.

Instant ringing.

You felt your heart slow and your head buzzed. You opened your eyes slowly and heard the drowning sound of Minho kneeling in front of you, screaming.

“Y/N. GET UP.” You looked at Minho confused as he cut you out of your restraints, Hyunjin behind him reaching for your arm. The sounds of guns began shooting off as you were pulled up from your knees, stumbling. You saw the boys in front shooting guns at the men on the sides, bodies falling as you dodged.

“COME ON LET'S GO.” Hyunjin grabbed your hand as you looked at him and he took you. You turned your head and watched Minho shoot back at people and your grandfather lying on the floor. Blood pooled his body and your eyes widened in disbelief. This wasn’t the plan.

All too quickly you saw Minho get struck with a bullet and fall back and you stopped in your tracks and pulled from Hyunjin’s grip.

“MINHO!” You screeched and began running back and Hyunjin turned and grabbed you around the waist as he pulled you back.

“Y/N, NO!” He screamed and you began to cry as you were carried away and saw Seungmin run to Minho’s body and kept shooting.

“LET’S GO!” You heard someone yell as men began retreating. Hyunjin brought you to the car and put you in as you felt your body go numb. Hyunjin ran to the drivers side and you saw cars with your cousins begin driving past you.

“We gotta go.” Hyunjin said as he started the car and began following the cars.

Your mind was in too many places. Nothing made sense. Your grandfather was dead. And Minho shot him.

Minho was shot.

“This wasn’t the plan.” You softly said and Hyunjin looked over to you and sighed.

“I know.”

You sat in the passenger seat and watched the cars in front. Your family was driving, Minho may be there. You had no idea what was happening but you were near your family at least.

Until the cars turned in different directions. Opposite ways and you and Hyunjin kept going forward. You turned your head back frantically as Hyunjin sped forward.

“My family.” You said and Hyunjin didn’t budge.

“Hyunjin... my family.” You looked at him as he kept his eyes in the road. You were growing frustrated and you grabbed his gun and aimed it at him.

“Hyunjin, stop the car.” You watched as he sighed and side eyed you and you cocked the gun back and screamed.

“STOP THE CAR!”

Hyunjin cursed and slammed on the brakes and you held yourself up from crashing into the front of the car.

Hyunjin opened his car door and got out as you watched in disbelief and got out of the car too. He walked around the front of the car and you kept going

“WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT HUH?! I TOLD YOU GUYS THE PLAN! YOU DIDN’T FOLLOW THE PLAN! WE NEED TO GO BACK. MY FAMILY IS IN DANGER. MINHO IS HURT. GRANDFATHER IS DEAD!

“Y/N.” Hyunjin said quietly as you were panicking and hitting your fists against his chest.

“THEY NEED ME. YOU WERE SUPPOSE TO SHOOT ME NOT HIM THAT WAS THE PLAN!”

Hyunjin pulled the white note out of his pocket and raised it in the air and yelled back.

“THIS Y/N!? THIS IS YOUR PLAN!?”

You stopped and looked at the note you had written for Hyunjin. He groaned and calmed down as you felt the tears fall from your face. He watched you and took your hand in his.

“What we did back there. That was the only way. That was the only way out.” Hyunjin told you as you shook your head.

“Hyunjin,  what you guys did back there… you just started a war. We are all in danger now. All of us, they won’t stop till I’m dead. Our baby Hyunjin, our baby is in danger. They won’t quit..”

“Y/N” Hyunjin clasps his hands over your cheeks and you look up at him in his eyes. He wiped your tears away.

“I’m taking you far away. A safe place where no one will find us and we can raise our child.”

“But my family and Minho..” you interrupted and Hyunjin wiped another tear.

“Will be fine. They know the plan. They know the risks. Your safety is their priority.”

You look down at your feet and Hyunjin lifted your chin back up to meet eyes and he kissed you softly. He slid his hand over your stomach and you grinned a bit. Hyunjin pulled back and looked at you again.

“This is my priority. You are my life. We are going to have this baby. And this child is a gift, a reason to start anew.”

You smiled and thought about his words as you raised your hands to caress his face and he smiled at you before leaning in to capture your lips in one last kiss.

Because this was the beginning to a new end. This was where you and the love of your life made a new start. This man, who you have loved for years. The person who makes your heart skip a beat when he walks in a room. He who made you feel safe and secured. From the moment you said ‘I do’ you knew that this man was your eternal. He was the one you couldn’t live life without. You two were cut from the same strand, two souls as one.

“I love you Hwang Y/N.” Hyunjin softly said against your lips, forehead pressed against your.

“I love you too, Hwang Hyunjin.”

A/N: hi everyone! i do apologize for the postponement. Thank you for your patience and love. I am doing very well and with family. Thank you ❤️ this is the end my loves. its bittersweet truthfully and i am very happy to have shared this story with you. As always let me know your thoughts and feelings. please stay tuned for my next series, Everlasting.

Taglist:   @hyunfeji @zenzedana @datura-inoxia @ninjaleeknow @beethiin @hyunsxle @hwangful @huntressfrost25 @exonations @p0t4t0don14ll​ @beaann @minaamhh

[m4tthewmurd0ck]

burn ~ matt murdock  x  oc (chapter 2)

chapter 2 is a flashback to the Matt / Cassie / Foggy college days :) it’s 1.8k words so i’ll post it below the “continue reading”.

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     MATT SAYS IT WAS FATE, MEETING CASSIE. They both remember everything about that day. And even though she's Foggy's sister, and even if they hadn't met on that day in particular they would've met eventually, he still insisted it was fate.

The Nelson siblings had both settled into their dorm rooms just fine. Since neither had any friends yet, they tended to stick together like they had since they were kids. 

Cassie was attending Columbia as well, but majoring in Visual Arts and minoring in Art History, while her brother wanted to be a lawyer. While she hoped to run her own gallery someday, he dreamed of being a big-shot lawyer. 

On that particular day, Foggy was sat with his laptop in front of him, attempting to add a few more classes to his schedule. Cassie was sat on the other bed, since his roommate hadn't arrived yet. When a series of loud knocks echoed in the room, she immediately hopped off the bed.

"Excuse me is this room 312?"

"Yeah who are you lookin' for?" Foggy mumbled, without even glancing up from his laptop.

"Dude," Cassie hissed under her breath, walking over to her brother and giving him a slap on the side of his head.

"Oh— uh, sorry."

"What for?"

"...you're, blind, right?"

"Uh yeah, so they tell me. I hope that won't be a problem."

"Why would it?"

It was like a switch went off in his mind. "Oh! You're my roomie!"

Cassie sighed, shaking her head at her brother. "This dummy is Foggy. I'm Cassie, his sister."

"Nice to meet you Cassie, and Foggy. Matt Murdock," he stepped forward, hand outstretched.

Cassie closed the gap between them and shook his hand. She stepped aside when Foggy finally stood up and joined them.

"Wait, Matt Murdock... you're not from Hell's Kitchen are you?"

"Uh, yup. Born and raised."

"So are we! Yeah we heard about you when we were kids. You saved that guy crossing the street?"

Cassie noticed Matt seemed a little uncomfortable with the subject.

"I— I just did what anyone would've done."

"Bullshit you are a hero."

"I'm really not."

"Come on you got your peepers knocked out saving that old dude!"

Cassie picked up a pillow and threw it at her brother. "One day you're gonna say the wrong thing to the wrong person and they're gonna punch you."

"Please, it's nothing, no offense taken whatsoever," Matt chuckled. "Most people dance around me like I'm made of glass, I hate that. This is, this is a nice change."

"You don't need to worry about that with this guy," Cassie glanced at her brother. "I don't think he's ever had a filter."

As Foggy attempted to explain how it would be awesome now that he could be Matt's wingman and Matt could be his, Cassie began to quietly gather her things. There wasn't much, she'd just brought along a sketchbook, textbook, and pencil case.

"Leaving already?" Matt asked. 

Cassie had only just slipped her backpack on, and she paused. "Oh, yeah. I was about to head back to my dorm, probably grab some coffee on the way back. Actually, do either of you want to come? It's close by."

"Matt, do you know of any good coffee spots on campus?" Foggy spoke up.

"No, I'm not too familiar with the layout yet."

"Well lucky for you we do and it's filled with luscious co-ed's. Shall we?"

A couple of minutes later, they emerge from the dorm building and begin walking down the street. 

Without warning, Matt put his arm around Cassie and pulled her to the side. Less than a couple of seconds later, a girl goes speeding by, riding her bicycle on the sidewalk.

A car on the road honks at as the girl rides by without stopping, causing Cassie to jump a little.

"What is it with everyone today," Foggy shakes his head.

"Here," Matt holds his arm out, sensing her nerves. "I'll be like your seeing eye dog. Except I'm blind, but I'll still lead the way."

Cassie can't help but laugh, and all tension quickly went away. She links her arm through his and they quickly catch up to Foggy, who'd already begun walking again.

When they reach the coffee shop, Matt tries and fails to hold back a smile when Cassie's arm doesn't leave his, even as they're ordering.

He hadn't expected to make friends so quickly, and he genuinely appreciated that neither Cassie nor Foggy walked on eggshells around him. Random room assignments were always a gamble, and Matt knew he really lucked out.

Cassie glanced at the man that stood next to her as he ordered his coffee. She wondered how on earth he heard that woman on her bicycle. In any case she was thankful, not even wanting to imagine if she'd been sent to the E.R. after being knocked over. 

What surprised her most was how quickly they eased into a friendship. 

Once the trio had all gotten their drinks and snacks, they settled at a small table and sat there for over an hour just talking and learning random bits about each other.

"—and when he was little, one time Foggy—"

"Alright Cassiopeia that's enough out of you."

Matt took a sip of his coffee, before turning towards Cassie. "Cassiopeia huh?"

"Please not you too. I don't know why I got the weird name and my brother got such a normal one. Like wouldn't that be odd to introduce your kids? This is Franklin, and this is Cassiopeia. One of these things is not like the other."

Foggy thought about it for a moment, "I mean it does sound kind of cool."

"Maybe until you learn who she actually was. Cassiopeia," she turned her attention towards Matt, "was a queen who constantly boasted how she and her daughter were more beautiful than the daughters of the sea God Nereus. It angered Poseidon so much that he tied her to a chair up in the heavens. A torture chair, specifically. So that half the time she'd be stuck upside down."

"I'm pretty sure mom and dad just thought it sounded cool."

"I like it," Matt smiled. "Despite the history of the name, it still sounds beautiful. And hearing your voice, it suits you in a way."

Hearing this, Foggy shook his head. "Nope. You two are not allowed to flirt. I object."

"Alright your big spiel for coming here was that there were... luscious co-ed's? Was that what you said I can't quite remember..."

"Touché my sister, touché." Foggy got up to go and order another cup of coffee.

It wasn't until he was already in line that Cassie looked at his cup. "I'm pretty sure he just wants to talk to one of the girls in line, because his cup is still half full."

There was a moment of silence between them, but both were surprised with how comfortable it felt. After another moment, Matt spoke up.

"So, are you going to study law too?"

"Oh no, I really admire what my brother's doing but I don't think I'm cut out for that. I'm an art major. Focusing on visual arts and art history related classes."

Matt nodded, genuinely interested. "That's still really cool. What do you plan to do once you graduate?"

"Well the big end goal is to someday run my own art gallery. That's my dream career. But right after graduation? And possibly even while still in school towards the end, hopefully start out at any gallery that'll hire me. Maybe as a receptionist first just to get my foot in the door."

"You'll do great wherever you apply."

Cassie tilted her head slightly. "You sound pretty sure for someone who just met me."

"When you're blind, you tend to pick up on other things a lot faster. For example, your voice. You speak with confidence, and that counts for a lot. Like... okay who's your favorite artist?"

"That's an easy one. And this may be incredible cliche because I feel like a lot of people say him. But it's Vincent van Gogh."

"Why?"

Pausing for a moment, Cassie gathered her thoughts before speaking. "He led such a hard life. I know he wasn't the only artist to ever be dealt hardships, but when you look at all that he went through... multiple illnesses, a year in a psychiatric institute, towards the end over a period of ten weeks he produced over 175 paintings and sketches. His works are phenomenal. Beautiful, especially when you look beyond the painting. But he died by his own hand, believing himself to be a failure. I can't imagine how hard his life must've been. Ever since I learned more, I just became fascinated by all of his work. Seeing the beauty he could produce despite struggling so much, being proof that beauty can sometimes be pain, it's a lot of the reason why he's my favorite artist."

"See," Matt shrugged. "You're passionate about what you love. Even I can see that. And that means a lot, because I'm... you know, blind."

"Well thank you, can I quote you on that or put you down as a reference on my next job application?" Cassie grinned.

"Another thing I've learned to pick up on, you're smiling right now, aren't you?"

"Aw c'mon you're still flirting?" Foggy sat back down, having finished his conversation.

Cassie glared at her brother. "I'm sorry weren't you just over there flirting with a complete stranger?"

"She's not a stranger anymore," Foggy wiggled his eyebrows. "Got her number and everything."

"Okay yet I can't flirt with my new friend and your new roommate? And that's not what we were doing by the way, but still."

Matt shook his head. "Seems a little hypocritical if you ask me."

"Exactly!" Cassie scooted her chair closer to Matt's, leaning her head on his shoulder. Matt immediately picked up on what she was doing and grabbed her hand, holding it up high so that Foggy had to see.

"Okay okay okay point taken you can let go of each other's hands and scoot your chairs apart again thank you very much."

From then on, it became a running joke between Matt and Cassie. Whenever they were all together, they'd usually mess with Foggy just a little bit.

A close friendship quickly blossomed, and if they weren't in class, you could count on the three friends to be hanging out together.

It wasn't surprising that Cassie developed a bit of a crush on Matt. But he never spoke about dating anyone, and Foggy seemed pretty intent on him and Matt being each other's wing men, so Cassie never said anything.

Besides, she was just his roommates sister, and clearly only saw her as a friend. And when she thought about it, she decided she'd rather have him as a good friend, than confess her crush and risk losing him. So... Cassie simply stayed quiet.

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[sorryimananti-romantic]

Mist | Choi San | Chapter 4

Pairing: Choi San x OC (Seohyun)

Genre: supernatural (ghost), romance, high school

Trigger Warnings: paranormal, death mentions, violence

Words: 6.6k

Disclaimer: I do not own anything except my original character and the story. I do not own any gifs or pictures used.

Full story on Wattpad (don’t spoil here if you read there too)

chapter directory

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Seohyun was waiting for Jiwoo for quite a while now, sitting on the desk in her room, doodling in her notebook. She sighed as she shut it, a bit frustrated. It was not like Jiwoo to leave her hanging.

Seohyun considered going out; it was highly likely that Jiwoo was at their usual spot- the park near the school, her home, or the accident site. It was about 10 pm. Wasn't that late, was it? She got up, but stopped.

Maybe Jiwoo needed space.

It was probably this, but Seohyun couldn't help fearing that she had just moved on. If she'd gotten her memories back, that could mean that she was a whole different person now. She might not be the Jiwoo she knew anymore.

Seohyun fell on her bed, staring at the wall, and suddenly felt goosebumps.

"Took you long enough," Seohyun said, not bothering to look at Jiwoo, who had just entered the room.

"Don't tell me you were waiting for me," Jiwoo smirked.

"Oh, why would I?" Seohyun smirked back, and made space for Jiwoo, who sat on the bed with her. "So?"

"So, my dear friend," Jiwoo began, clearly excited to tell her her life story.

And she did. She was Ahn Jiwoo, daughter to two loving parents and a sister to a 16 year old brother. She'd had a pretty normal life; her father was a finance manager and her mother a housewife, and she had a lot of friends during her school years too. The rumours about her father being some sort of criminal were wrong; she had to face those rumours in her life too. They had her confused with another Jiwoo in her class.

"So we were a group of four friends; 2 boys and 2 girls. I was kind of a rebel in my last few months of life, because I just found life boring. I wanted an adventure. Something new. I wanted to travel too. So I was suggesting to my friends that we should do something. They were all busy in their own ways, and I didn't understand. I kept bugging them. So when we were in that restaurant, we had an argument. I knew it was my fault. I stormed off, and I was just about to go back when I got hit by a car."

"Oh... so then you went to the hospital, and they found out you lost your memories?"

"Right," she said, "But I was already in a critical condition. Brain damage led me to death."

"Ah..." Seohyun stared at her. Jiwoo's eyes were sad as she told her this, but she looked content. "So the reason you stayed..."

"The reason I stayed was not one, but two. I wanted to make sure my friends didn't blame themselves and my parents had moved on. And I spent the whole day making sure that was the case."

"And the other reason?"

"I want an adventure," she said and smiled brightly.

"Ugh, you ghosts! You stay for the most stupid reasons!" Seohyun mocked and dramatically threw her head in her hands, which made Jiwoo hit her with a pillow until she was laughing.

"That's my last wish, Seohyun. You think you could do that for me? Go on an adventure with me?"

"Haven't you had enough of adventure though? I mean, living with me is an adventure in itself-"

"I already talked to San," Jiwoo said, catching her attention. "He actually thought it was a nice idea. So we're going on an adventure this week. He said he'll make it a surprise for me."

"Hey, hey, that's not fair? You didn't even ask me!"

"I didn't have to," Jiwoo flipped her red hair.

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"I don't know why I ever agreed to this," Seohyun sighed, handing her bag to Wooyoung who put it with the other few bags.

"Stop being a boomer and get in," Wooyoung said, and Seohyun did, muttering how she should have never suggested this.

"Should've thought before you planned all of it," Jongho snickered and Seohyun shot a glare.

"Everybody's in?" Hongjoong asked and they looked at each other, shouting a yes. Hongjoong gave a thumbs up and took the front seat of the van after shutting the door.

Everyone, including Jiwoo, who couldn't stop smiling, were seated. Seohyun had asked her mom to lend her a van that could fit 10 people, and though her mom had raised her brows in question, she had agreed when Seohyun said it was a trip with friends. She had just been surprised she had friends that were not ghosts, so without further questions (quite conveniently) she agreed, on the condition that the driver would be someone from the company.

She did raise a question when she found out that she was the only girl in the whole group, and there were only 9 people. Seohyun finally told her she was doing a favour for a ghost who had saved her life, and her mother made her promise she'd tell her the story someday.

They were going to Muchangpo Beach. They decided they'd see the sunset there. It was close to Seoul and the only place they could afford to travel and have an 'adventure'. They'd have a fun time, the boys promised, saying everything was fun when they were together.

Jiwoo was sitting between San and Wooyoung, and the three of them were chatting. Seohyun smiled when she saw that San was her voice; he'd say whatever she had to say.

She herself was in the middle row with Seonghwa and Yeosang by her sides. The two of them were also half bent backwards, listening to whatever the three of them were talking about. Seohyun had plugged her earphones in but she wasn't playing any music yet. She just listened to them talk.

"Tell us something about Seohyun," Wooyoung asked, giggling. Seohyun smiled inwardly.

"Well, Seohyun," Jiwoo thought, "she's quite rude, isn't she?"

"She's quite rude, isn't she?" San did his job, and the five of them laughed.

"She's not that rude,~" Seonghwa casted a glance at her, sighing in relief when he thought she couldn't hear him. Seohyun bit her cheek from the inside to stop smiling.

"She's scared of crows, of all thing," Jiwoo revealed, and the boys laughed a little. "She'll never show it, but when more than three crows are around, she runs for her life."

"Ah, I haven't ever noticed," Yeosang said, rubbing his chin, "she can hide it really well."

"Tell us some ghost story," Wooyoung asked. He was clearly enjoying this.

"I have a good one!" Jiwoo exclaimed and everyone seemed to scoot closer. "There was once a boy about her age who had the most stupid reason to not move on."

San almost stopped as he narrowed his eyes at Jiwoo and she assured him it was not Joon Hyuk. So San told the boys, and asked them to guess.

"He wanted an adventure too?" Yeosang laughed.

Jiwoo pouted, but said it could fall in that category, but it was a different sort of adventure. She told them to let their imagination run wild.

As San told the boys, Seohyun decided this was her cue to interrupt. "We are NOT going to talk about that!"

Wooyoung screamed a little in surprise. "Weren't you listening to music?!"

Jiwoo was just laughing and Seohyun bared her teeth at her, making everyone laugh and wonder just what sort of adventure did the boy want. After a hundred pleads from the boys, Seohyun finally told them that it didn't actually happen; she just threatened the ghost in unimaginable ways, making him move on without his desire.

"I think I have an idea of what happened," Yeosang thought, amusement in his eyes, "But I am too afraid to voice it out."

"I think you got it then," Seohyun nodded in approval and Yeosang gaped at her.

"You got it tough, friend," he said, patting her shoulder to comfort her. San and Wooyoung were pouting very loudly, and Seonghwa just stared at Yeosang and Seohyun as understanding passed between them.

"You both are so weird," Seonghwa finally said.

"If I tell you, Seonghwa, you'll drown in shame. Better protect your ears and your pure mind," Seohyun grinned.

San and Wooyoung exchanged glances, frowning, but they shook their head. It couldn't be that bad. Could it?

Seohyun plugged her earphones again, deciding she'd take a nap and actually played music this time.

-----------

"We're here!"

Seonghwa shook her awake, and Seohyun slowly opened her eyes, her hand going in front of her eyes as she blocked the sunlight. She took off her earphones and the sound of waves hit her, making her smile. She adjusted her green dress that reached below her knees, and put her hat on.

She saw that Jiwoo was already out, running along the beach, and San was watching her with a smile on his face. He turned back, meeting eyes with Seohyun, who suddenly felt out of breath.

San was handsome- painfully handsome. And the plain white shirt he wore didn't help. His hair was flying due to the breeze and he ran a hand through them, cocking his head to the side as he watched her.

The sun making his skin glow didn't help either.

Seohyun cleared her throat and joined him, and they both watched Jiwoo, in her jeans and green T shirt that she had died in- her permanent outfit, running as freely as she could, her red hair flowing behind her, her laugh ringing in the air.

"I didn't know she'd be that happy to see the beach. Hasn't she been here before?" Seohyun asked.

"I think she has. She knew the way. And I'm almost suspicious she's doing this just to annoy you," San answered.

As if on cue, Jiwoo stopped, doing a weird dance, then started twerking-

"And that's our cue to look away," Seohyun grabbed San, now laughing, by his arm and went to join the others. "They didn't have to come. They can't see her."

"We figured out a way to enjoy with her even if we can't see her," San smirked.

And that was how, a few moments later, they all were assembled in a circle playing cards.

"Why do I think San and Seohyun are cheating on us with Jiwoo?" Yunho looked at them suspiciously.

"How do you think the cards are in the air?" Seohyun asked, and Yunho grinned. She had a point. To anyone who could not see Jiwoo, it would look like a bunch of cards were in the air.

"I WON!" Jiwoo smacked the final card and jumped in the air. Seohyun gaped at her.

"You cheated!" She shouted.

"I was sitting with you the whole time, don't give me that shit," Jiwoo smirked.

San told them that she had, indeed, won without cheating and everybody groaned. Mingi dragged the food basket and him and Jongho started spreading the food.

"Can she really not eat?" Jongho asked.

"I'm afraid not," Seohyun answered.

"Isn't it rude to eat in front of a ghost?" Jiwoo put her hands on her hip and Seohyun popped a cherry in her mouth, saying, "It is."

San scoffed. Jiwoo kicked Seohyun's leg lightly and said she was going to walk. The rest of them started to eat.

"I heard the sunset here is very pretty," Seonghwa said.

"I've been here before," Mingi took a bite of his sandwich, "It really is the prettiest."

After eating a little, Seohyun looked in the distance where Jiwoo was standing near the shore, the waves flowing near her. Jiwoo looked back and started walking towards them, then stopped halfway and gestured at them to come.

"She's calling us," San said, and they all got up, joining Jiwoo.

"I want to play in the water," Jiwoo said.

"What's stopping you?" Seohyun asked.

"With you all, you dumbass," Jiwoo laughed and took her hand, leading her to the shore.

"Hey, hey, easy there," Seohyun laughed and let out a little yelp as the waves hit her bare feet. "The water is so cold!"

Jiwoo bent down and sprayed the water on Seohyun, smirking.

"Oh no, you did not!" Seohyun bent down and sprayed back before she could run. And so started a battle of getting each other wet. They all forgot all their worries for a while, running around in the waves, laughing as loudly as they could, laughing even louder when one of them got Jiwoo. By the time it got darker, they were all quite wet.

Yunho and Yeosang ran back to get towels for everyone, throwing them one each, and wondering if Jiwoo should have a towel. Seohyun said there was no need, but Jiwoo snatched hers once she was done.

"The sunset's here, guys," Yeosang said.

They all stood silently, side by side, watching the sky change to brilliant shades of candy, the sun reflecting on the sea. It was breathtakingly beautiful. At some point, Jiwoo crossed her hand with Seohyun's, and she turned to look at her face. Her red hair shone brightly and her eyes were wet.

"I want it to be the last thing that I see before I go," Jiwoo almost whispered. Seohyun's heart sank in her knees. It was really happening.

Jiwoo looked at San and smiled widely, San smiled back and waved at her. Jiwoo asked him to tell everyone that she was thanking them for doing so much for her. They all assured her it was nothing, and said they were gonna miss her.

San looked at Seohyun, nodding and urged the others to come with him. Only Jiwoo and Seohyun remained now, facing the sunset.

"It's really happening," Jiwoo finally said. A cry of pain escaped Seohyun's mouth. She couldn't take it anymore. Jiwoo rubbed her hand comfortingly, making her face herself. "You've given me an adventure. The time I spent with you, that was enough. Today was for you, Seohyun."

"Are you serious?" Seohyun asked.

Jiwoo nodded. "I told everyone it was for me, but no. It was for you. A gift for helping me out so much. For being a friend. A little sister that I always wanted."

Seohyun smiled sadly, "I'm gonna miss you so, so much. I got used to you, I shouldn't have."

"I know," Jiwoo smiled, kissing her forehead and wrapping her in a hug. Seohyun closed her eyes and inhaled. "Don't cry on me right now, Seohyun."

Seohyun laughed a little. "I'm trying not to, you're making it harder by reminding me!" She opened her eyes and saw the boys, watching them from a distance.

"I hope you'll open your heart more, Seohyun. That's my last wish. You had a tough life, but you have so many people, dead and alive, who love you. I hope you remember that, always."

"Unnie..." A tear escaped Seohyun.

Jiwoo watched the sunset, Seohyun in her arms, and it was perfect.

She closed her eyes.

----------------

Seohyun felt it, felt her presence fade away. She was no longer hugging Jiwoo. She stood for a few seconds before finally collapsing on the sand and she shuddered as tears began to flow. She put her face in her hands and cried her heart out.

The boys approached her, sitting around her, rubbing her back, telling her that it was okay. She just cried and cried, and she knew she was letting go of Joon Hyuk along with Jiwoo too. The proper goodbye that she had so badly wanted, she finally got it.

San put her arms around her and brought her closer, caressing her hair. After a few minutes, she was out of tears. She let her hair cover her face as she rested her head on San's shoulder, trying to normalize her breath.

Jongho handed her a water bottle. She managed a smile and took a few sips, rubbing her eyes. The boys looked at each other. They weren't sure what they should do next.

"God damn me if I ever befriend a ghost again," Seohyun said and finally laughed, making everyone else laugh along.

"Are you okay?" Hongjoong asked.

"Yes, I am, actually," she said, wiping her eyes again. "I'm done crying for a while now." Her eyes went to San, who understood and smiled.

"Alright, let's get some dinner."

-----------

The driver had dropped Seohyun home now, and was on the way to drop the rest of them. As Seohyun entered her home, it felt strange. She felt utterly alone now that she knew Jiwoo wasn't gonna be back ever.

She tried to recall the time, only a few months ago, when she hadn't met Jiwoo yet. What did she even do in her spare time? She could not remember.

Seohyun went in her room and changed into her PJs first. After she combed her hair and scrolled a bit, she got up to turn off the light and saw something lying on her desk.

It was a painting. Of Jiwoo and her, cheek to cheek, smiling, the black cat in their arms. Seohyun gasped a little and examined it. It was really well drawn. Who made it?

She turned the page and saw something written on the back of it:

Seohyun,

I remember now that I loved painting. Since we don't have any photos, I captured us in this painting. Now you have a photo!

Love always, Jiwoo unnie ^^

Seohyun laughed a little as she read how she had addressed herself. "I guess you really liked being called unnie," she thought out loud.

She set the painting on her bookshelf. After being content with its position, she turned off the light, and slept surprisingly peacefully throughout the night.

------------

"I swear to god if you don't make fun of me when I do something stupid, I'm never gonna talk to you all again."

"Well, that's new," Yeosang commented, "You're begging for it now."

"Better that then you all being like this!" Seohyun let out a frustrated sigh.

The boys were being ridiculously sensitive with Seohyun, and she was feeling absolutely uncomfortable. She hadn't noticed it the first two days, but then she noticed in the little things; how they'd always offer her food before eating themselves, how they'd always accompany her, etc. She had enough of the special treatment.

"You're acting like someone died," Seohyun said.

"Back at it with the dead jokes are you?" San shook his head.

"Technically, Jiwoo was dead," Jongho remarked.

"So did she die twice then?" Mingi wondered.

"Oh please," Seohyun sighed again, "I just want you all to act like we used to. No more special treatment. Please, this makes it worse. I'm already at terms with Jiwoo going. It was bound to happen."

"Alright, alright," Seonghwa said and shushed her. "We didn't know what else we could do. Back to normal, okay?"

"Thank you," Seohyun truly meant it. "Also, I think I'm ready to share my drums." The boys hooted except one.

"Are you angry?" Mingi asked. Seohyun immediately turned to San, who was suddenly interested in Wooyoung's fingernails.

"Now I am," Seohyun muttered, and San smiled without meeting her eyes. The teacher came and interrupted their session, so they went back to studying.

After school was over, the boys decided to go to their warehouse, while Seohyun asked if anyone would help her bring the drums. San volunteered and they walked to her home, the black cat in San's hand.

As they walked, talking about how it looked like the cat missed Jiwoo, San stopped in his tracks. "I think you have a guest."

Seohyun looked ahead and saw a middle aged man dressed like a doctor. He was a ghost. Seohyun shared a look with San and went ahead.

"How can I help you?" Seohyun asked. The ghost got startled when he saw that San could see him too.

Jiwoo had once explained that to ghosts, Seohyun shined a little brighter than the rest of the humans, which was how they knew. Seohyun had just thought she was crazy but now she realized, now that she was with San, that it must be true.

Or maybe Jiwoo hadn't been joking that one time when she said there was a banner on top of her head and every ghost could see it, only Seohyun couldn't.

"I was told you'd help me," the doctor said. Seohyun nodded and he continued. "I made a mistake. I operated on a patient and it went wrong. It was my fault. The patient lost his vision. They were going to sue me, but when I tried to settle it, we had an argument. They gave up on suing me, saying I wasn't even worth the trouble.

"It was a few days later. I went into a slump and started drinking a lot. I was on the roof of the hospital and it wasn't my intention, but I slipped. That's how I died."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Seohyun said, "How can I help you move on then?"

"I want to let the patient know that I truly am sorry, and I want to let my family, just my family know that it wasn't a suicide. I wouldn't leave them behind on purpose."

"But... isn't it easier for your family this way? Than knowing that you are now a ghost? That it wasn't an accident?"

"I think," San began, "that he's right. It's more easier for them if they know he didn't commit suicide. They'd feel really bad if they think he left them on purpose. No one wants that from the people they love."

The doctor smiled thankfully at San. "I'll take you to the patient first," he said and asked if he should teleport the two of them.

"Do you want to come? You don't have to," Seohyun said.

San stroked the cat's head. "I want to."

"I don't know if it's safe for San to teleport. So we'll take the mundane route. Lead the way, sir."

"It's quite a distance. I hope you have money for taxi," the doctor said.

On the way to the patient's house, they had a nice chat with the doctor. He told them about his life, back when he was famous for being a good surgeon. He had never made a mistake and he had always held pride in that. But with this particular patient, he took a risk he knew he shouldn't have.

He told them he had a 10 year old daughter and he wanted her to become a doctor too. He wanted her to know that it was good to save people, and she shouldn't be afraid to take risks but also be careful at the same time and know her limits.

Seohyun was actually touched by the whole thing. It was good to have ghosts like these once in a while; nice, well-mannered ghosts.

They reached the patient's house. It was in a posh area; the patient himself must be rich. The house looked more like a mansion from the outside. Upon ringing the doorbell, a woman appeared, who the doctor told them was his wife. She seemed to be past 50s.

"We're relatives of Dr. Lee, the one who operated on your husband. We're here to discuss things about the case."

The woman passed them a skeptical look, "The doctor passed away, didn't he? We gave up on the case altogether. What do you want now?"

"We just want to talk to Mr. Cho. It's important. Please."

The woman let them in, guided them to the chairs in the garden and said she'd bring her husband. San and her sat down, admiring the lush gardens. The doctor paced worriedly.

"It will be alright. I have a way with words," Seohyun assured the doctor.

The husband and wife arrived; San and Seohyun got up and greeted them respectfully. "I am Seohyun, Dr. Lee's distant relative. This is San, my cousin."

"Have a seat," he said and they all settled down, including the wife. Seohyun sighed and decided she'd get to the point.

"Dr. Lee made a mistake. You must know that," Seohyun said. The wife looked at her husband worriedly.

"So he says," Mr. Cho said, staring in the distance.

"He wants to apologize, sincerely. I'll get to the point. He's here right now. I can see ghosts, the dead who have not moved on. He had unfinished business here, because he wanted to sincerely apologize. He won't be able to move on until he hears your forgiveness."

"Is this a prank?" Mrs. Cho asked, but Mr. Cho shushed her.

"I hope you can prove he's here," Mr. Cho said.

"Dr. Lee told you about some ginseng plant right before you went under anesthesia. No one was there when he told you, right?"

"That's true," Mr. Cho smiled. His wife began to complain but he raised a hand. "That's interesting. My father had a friend. He could see ghosts too. Are you the Mediator?"

San and Seohyun looked at each other in surprise. "That's what they call me, yes."

Mr. Cho laughed a little. "I used to not believe my father and that friend of his for the longest time, until I saw something and couldn't believe my eyes. That's why I believe you too, girl. You're doing a good job."

"Thank you," Seohyun said.

"So Dr. Lee is here? I can speak directly to him?"

"Yes sir."

"Alright. Dr. Lee, it was your fault, I know. But I truly forgive you. There are things we cannot avoid. We call it fate or destiny. What's bound to happen, fortune or misfortune, happens and you cannot avoid it. That's what I believe. I want you to move on, without the burden of my accident holding you back. You didn't do it on purpose, and that is enough for me."

Tears escaped Mrs. Cho's eyes and she wiped them. Seohyun muttered to San, 'wise man', and they watched Dr. Lee's eyes shine with tears to as he said his apology and thanks. Seohyun conveyed the message.

They were offered tea, but Seohyun told them they had to get home. The man offered to help Seohyun out if she ever had trouble with this Mediator job. She accepted, saying she would pay a visit someday.

The three of them left the house, standing in the street and reflecting on what had happened.

"That went rather smoothly," Seohyun commented.

"I know!" San widened his eyes at her.

"Thank you, Seohyun. It really does feel like a burden off my shoulder."

"No problem, we should move now. What's the next job?"

"I don't think I can see them like this," the doctor said. "I love my daughter and my wife very much. Seeing them would want me to stay. Do you think I can write a letter to my wife? You can give it to her tomorrow."

"Will your wife believe that it was really written by you?"

"We had a secret code between us; we created it. If I mention it in the letter, she'll have to believe it. And she'll recognize my handwriting too."

San and Seohyun decided that was convenient, and Seohyun handed the doctor a pen and paper. He wrote a short one, muttering something about how the less he wrote the better it would be. Then he folded it and handed it to Seohyun.

"I trust you. You'll give the letter tomorrow, right? I wrote the address on the other page."

"I will deliver it personally."

"Thank you," the doctor smiled. "Do you think I'll be able to watch over my daughter?"

"Maybe you will," Seohyun said.

"Guardian angel," San added, making the doctor smile as he disappeared. He had moved on.

"Well," Seohyun said, "That was quick. I love it when ghosts are wise enough to actually know how to handle their mess."

San scoffed. "Let's go."

-------------

Grabbing some coffee from a café they passed by, they took a taxi to Seohyun's home. Seohyun insisted that they should eat before they packed the drums and go to the warehouse. San helped her set the table. She had made pasta last night, which she reheated, and had some chocolates for dessert.

"Does your mom ever come home?" San asked as he nibbled on the chocolate.

Seohyun yawned. San reflected. They both were tired and sleepy now. "She has an apartment near her office so she only comes once a week here."

San yawned again and Seohyun laughed. "Should I let you nap?"

San smiled lazily. "Let's just pack the drums while you're still angry. I don't want you to change your mind."

Seohyun threw the wrapper at him and he caught it before it hit his face, throwing it right back. She dodged it. "Come on, let's dismantle it."

It took them ten minutes to dismantle and pack the drums. But it was already night time, and the boys had locked the warehouse and gone home when San asked them.

"Well, I'll call them here tomorrow. They should take it if they want it so much."

"Good idea." San said, yawning again.

"I think if I let you go home now, you're gonna fall asleep in the middle of the road. Take a power nap, San."

"Oh no, I shouldn't. I'll just go," he said and walked past her, only to be grabbed by the arms and led to a room despite him insisting he was not THAT sleepy.

San entered the room and immediately knew it was Seohyun's. The potted plants, the books, the mess. And the painting.

"So that's the painting, eh," he said, walking towards it and looking at the detail, absolutely wowed by it.

"How do you know? I don't think I mentioned," Seohyun narrowed her eyes.

"Jiwoo told me she left a gift for you," he smiled. Seohyun went to stand with him, looking at the painting with him.

"She's really good," she said.

San looked down at her. She felt so small; he was about a head taller than her. He turned towards her, his hand going to play with her hair. "You're really okay, right?"

"I am, San," Seohyun assured him. "I do feel lonely when I'm home, but you guys make up for it everyday."

San nodded. He was still playing with her hair. Seohyun suddenly flushed; they were standing quite close to each other. San noticed her looking at him, her light brown eyes shining.

He seemed to be searching her eyes for something. And Seohyun wasn't sure what it was, but she felt her heart pumping louder every second. She was, oh god, she was so attracted to him. He made her feel so many things just by looking at her.

"What are you looking at?" Seohyun asked- almost whispered.

"You," San said, bringing his hand to cup her face, surprised when she leaned in to his touch and closed her eyes. It made him melt. He brought her in for a hug and she gladly wrapped her arms around his waist, his small waist. She could hear his heart beat just as loudly. San rested his face on her head, rocking them back and forth. He didn't want to let go, he wanted to stay like this as long as he could.

Seohyun sighed. All she could think about was how he felt. Her mind was truly blank.

San finally broke apart a little, Seohyun's arms still around his waist. He was staring at her, his hands cupping her face, putting stray hair behind her ears. Seohyun wanted to do the same to him, but at the same time she didn't want to let go of him.

"Seohyun, Seohyun," he whispered, loving the sound of her name on his lips. She bit her lip. It seemed like they just stared at each other for the longest time, afraid to say anything, until Seohyun smiled at the situation.

San kissed her forehead first, a light peck. When she didn't move away, he tilted her face a bit upwards to kiss her cheekbone, then her cheek, leaving butterfly kisses, making her tremble all over. She clenched his shirt tighter, out of breath already. Their noses brushed and she loved the feeling of it, his breath warm on her. And when their lips brushed, San finally kissed her properly.

And Seohyun's mind went blank.

San's hand went behind her neck and Seohyun finally left his waist, only to cup his face herself as she guided him along. They tasted chocolate on each other. Seohyun was deepening the kiss, she just couldn't get enough. San mirrored her movements, following along, making her bend backwards until her back hit the desk and her hand went to rest on it for support.

San broke apart to catch his breath. His eyes were glazed, and so were Seohyun's. He put his hand on Seohyun's, the one that was on the desk, and with a sultry look and half a smile, he kissed her again, so passionately that it made Seohyun curve back and back until San was half on top of her.

When they broke apart, finally short of breath, Seohyun smirked. "I thought you were sleepy."

"I still am," he said, resting her forehead against her and smiling, eyes shut.

Seohyun lead him to her bed, making him sit. She bit her lip and smirked as she positioned herself on San's lap. San held her by her waist and let her kiss him; on his cheeks, like he had done, a peck on his nose which made him laugh, and finally a kiss to the lips.

"God, the way you make me feel, Choi San!" She sighed dramatically.

"And how do I make you feel?" He questioned. Seohyun shook her head. "I'll tell you later. Now we sleep."

San set his alarm for a power nap and with Seohyun in her arms, they both slept peacefully. When the alarm did go off, Seohyun didn't budge. With a kiss on her forehead, he left the house.

----------

"There's something wrong with Seohyun," Yeosang announced and everyone turned to look at him.

"There's more?" Wooyoung asked sarcastically and Seohyun glared at him, turning to look at Yeosang, asking him what he meant by that.

"I don't know," Yeosang threw his hands in the air, clearly frustrated, "She keeps smiling to herself. It's creepy."

Seohyun and San shared a look and San, despite his struggle not to, burst out laughing. Seohyun pursed her lips, trying not to smile but failed.

"See?" Yeosang pointed at her, "Has she ever smiled like this?"

Wooyoung was looking at San and Seohyun. "You both.... Is there a secret I don't know about!?"

"I don't have secrets anymore..." Seohyun lied shamelessly, shrugging. San put his hands in the air and said, "I only laughed because of what Yeosang said."

"No, you're looking at each other with the most disgusting look in your eyes," Yeosang observed, "Don't tell me you two..."

"Ah, no, that cannot have happened!" Hongjoong waved him off as Seonghwa gasped.

"How could you even suggest such a thing?" Seonghwa shook his head, clearly disappointed in Yeosang.

"No, I didn't even say anything yet..." Yeosang looked at Seohyun to apologize but she smirked at him, making his eyes go wide.

"I am RIGHT! Something happened between these two, she smirked at me!"

Seohyun immediately put her poker face and looked at Mingi and Jongho, who were right in front of her, with the most innocent look in her eyes. "Did you see me smirk?"

Mingi and Jongho shook their heads. Yeosang shot Seohyun a glare. "I know I'm right. If this turns out to be true..."

"Stop being so dramatic," San said, shushing Yeosang, and got up to drink water.

They were all in the warehouse, having just left school, and were currently relaxing and drinking juice, chatting with each other. Yeosang had noticed Seohyun smiling more than usual, which made him think something happened. It didn't help that San and Seohyun couldn't stop exchanging glances.

Seohyun had brought the drum set with Yunho before coming to the warehouse. Seohyun motioned to Mingi and they got up, leaving the rest behind.

"Have you ever played drums before? Like, actual drums?"

"Yeah," Mingi answered, "A friend of mine had them."

"Alright, you should learn how to arrange them."

So Seohyun taught Mingi all about the components of a drum set, their various uses and how to dismantle them and put them back. Mingi listened carefully, and Seohyun smiled inwardly at how happy he looked. It made her feel guilty that she delayed it so much.

When they were done, they stood back to have a look.

"A much needed upgrade," Mingi smiled, ruffling Seohyun's hair, "Thanks."

"This drum set is my baby, okay? Use it well."

"Yes ma'am," Mingi saluted and Seohyun pointed at the drums. "Have a go."

Mingi sat on the stool, testing the weight of the drum sticks in his hand. He tested the sounds then, and played a little, freestyling, laughing as he did. The others had come to watch him, cheering and hyping him up.

"Not bad," Seohyun said when he finished, "Just go with your heart. Don't think."

"Your turn," Mingi handed her the drum sticks and she almost panicked.

"I think I'm good," she hesitated but someone pushed her forward. It was Yunho.

"I didn't go through all that trouble of coming to your house and carrying the drums to not see you play," he shook his head.

"Alright. Just a second," Seohyun said, tying her hair in a ponytail. "There you go."

Everyone hooted, clearly excited. This was the first time she was going to actually play in front of them, save for the time she had played the violin for San. San smiled at her as if he was thinking the same thing. Seohyun inhaled, testing the drums, and began.

She realized she really did enjoy playing the drums; there was just something about drums where you could express freely, and loudly, as if you wanted everyone to hear it. And it made her smile like crazy, put her brain on pause for a while and play with her heart.

She played like crazy, and when she was done, everyone was in awe.

"You're actually very good!" Hongjoong said, finally clapping. Seohyun bowed her head and got up. "I didn't expect this."

"It's like she was a different person," Jongho was looking at her with wonder.

"Teacher! you're my teacher from today," Mingi declared, and Seohyun scoffed at him.

"You don't need a teacher, teach yourself. I know you can."

"Nooo~" he wailed, "I would love you as a teacher!"

Seohyun just waved him off, going to San and smiling embarrassingly at him. He pinched her cheeks and she pouted, the two of them forgetting for a moment that everyone was still watching her.

"You two... there is something different!" Jongho laughed in disbelief. San and Seohyun started laughing. Yeosang just shook hands with Jongho, thanking him for finally noticing.

"They're not even bothering to deny it, guys," Yunho grinned.

"San is mine!" Wooyoung shouted dramatically, coming to hug San, sticking his tongue out at Seohyun. Seohyun glared at him, baring her teeth at him, and snatched San from him. Wooyoung gasped, and suddenly the two of them were in a battle, both pulling at San by his arms, who was laughing painfully, shouting for help.

"He's not even choosing!" Seohyun laughed, and winked at Wooyoung as she said, "Let's ditch him."

Wooyoung pushed San away, rather forcefully, who fell in Yeosang's arms. He put his arm in Seohyun and she flipped her hair as they walked away from him.

"No one loves me," San buried his nose in Yeosang's neck, pouting. Yeosang sighed, patting his head.

"You're right," Yeosang said, "Absolutely right."

"Hey..." San moaned like a little kid.

prev - next

[sashi-ya]

{+18} – Cherry Blossom & Tangerines – Trafalgar Law x Y/n – Part 5

Modern AU. Trip to Jeju Island, SK. No spoilers.

Female reader. No physical descriptions. Everybody is +18, canon ages. Chopper is human.

Tw: NSFW, blindfolding, soft sub/dom, unprotected sex (this is just fiction, pls wear protection). Fluff. A little bit of ZoSan

A/N: I haven’t had the chance to visit South Korea due to Covid, so everything included is pure research. Excuse me in advance if there is something that’s not 100% accurate! Keep in mind is purely inspired ♥

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31059467

Word Count: 4.5 K

» List of parts: {P1} {P2} {P3} {P4} {P5} {P6}«

Chapter 5

“Y/n it's our turn, let’s sing!!” Vivi told me, while pulling me from my arm. “Vivi, wait”, I said. I kept watching how Law was still hugging the girl. “What is it?... Oi!”, Nami said, also witnessing the scene.

“Don’t go, just… wait”, I begged my redhead friend who was ready to kill him. I saw how the mysterious woman and Law laughed together. Zoro didn’t even care, he was more drunk than anything else.

The girl was ruffling his hair, pinching his cheeks. Law didn’t even look at me. I didn’t know if he was just simply so amused about the girl that he simply forgot about me, or, he was doing this on purpose, knowing that I’ll be watching, maybe to let me know he wasn’t going to commit to me in any way.

“That’s it. I’m leaving”, I stated. Vivi, Robin and Nami insisted on me shouting at Torao, but I couldn’t. I was so hurt, and, besides that, I wasn’t even his girlfriend, so I had no right to reproach anything to him.

The girls came with me, and we drove home. The boys didn’t realize we had left until long after we weren’t at the karaoke bar, when Sanji texted Nami asking what the hell had just happened. “Sanji, you should ask your stupid ass friend Torao, what the hell is he doing with a bitch?, plus, go get your boyfriend too, she is right next to him”, Nami said via audio.

Sanji sent an audio back, “Nami-swan! Zoro is not my boyfriend… wait, you were talking about him, right?, whatever, Torao is still with her, I’m gonna see who the hell is she and kick the hell out of stupid Law for hurting Y/n-chwan”.

I drove as fast as I could, at that point I only wanted to bury myself in bed and cry my eyes out. I was silent all the way. My friends knew there was no point in saying anything else, so they just strung along with me.

We got home, and Robin offered me some tea, yet, I politely turned the offering down and headed almost running to my bed. I covered myself up to my face, and pitiful tears sprouted from my eyes.

I heard my cell phone ring several times, I knew it was probably my friends asking if I was all right. But I didn’t have the strength to even see the screen.

“Why did you choose to hurt me like this, Law?” ... I whispered to myself, unable to understand why I was in that position, why after all the romantic stuff he has done for me he didn’t even care I was there…

I reached my phone and simply turned it off, I was fed up with it ringing. Some minutes, perhaps half an hour passed until I fell asleep, crying.

Suddenly, Nami’s loud screams woke me up. “TORAO, WHAT THE FUCK? WHY ARE YOU BRINGING THIS SLUT HOME?”.

I didn’t hear Law’s voice, but I did hear someone climbing the stairs, quickly, almost running.

The door opened suddenly with a loud sound, like someone kicking on it. I was still in bed, and the bang of the door made me take an upright position instantly.

There he was, the villain of my story with tears on his eyes, hopeless, shaking. “Y/n-ya!!! it’s not what you think, let me explain…” “STOP, what type of lie are you going to spit out from your stupid mouth?, plus, what the hell? I heard Nami saying you brought that girl home. Have you been drinking? Are you drunk? what the fuck?” I shouted at him, also crying.

Suddenly, before Law could say anything else, I saw a brunette, tanned, tall girl, with big eyes that resemble Law’s ones. She looked at me, smiling and peacefully said, “Hello Y/n, my name is Lami. Trafalgar, Lami”.

I opened my eyes, and mouth… “Trafalgar?”.

“That’s right! I’m Law 's sister! Nice to meet you! I’m sorry if you got things wrong!” she said to my stunned me. “Oi, brother, she is so pretty!! Even more than in the pictures!”.

“Oh God…”. I was somehow relieved that Law wasn’t flirting with a girl, yet mortified because not only me, but all my friends had called Law’s sister a slut… a bitch.

“I am… I am really sorry… And, uhm, N-nice to meet you…”, I said, wiping the tears on my eyes. “It’s ok, darling! I’m leaving you alone so you can talk in peace, I’ll be downstairs!”. “O-ok”, I said sniffing.

Law slowly approached to the left side of my bed and sat there, next to me, in silence. I wasn’t capable of saying anything to him, either. I had put up a show, he probably thought I was a toxic girl, jealous or even worse things. I had mistrusted him. It was probably the end of something that hadn’t even started.

Suddenly, Law hurled himself on me, hugged me and nuzzled on my lap. “I thought you wouldn’t believe me, I’m sorry, I really do. Lami lives in Jeju and I wanted her to meet you because she is not traveling to Seoul any sooner, we just decided that we will be meeting at the bar so… so you could get to know her”. He said, still with his head buried onto my legs.

“Law…”, I began to cry again. I petted his hair and told him “I am the one who should be sorry. I- I thought you were a bad guy, a typical man that doesn’t care about the girls. I am sorry…”. I felt horrible.

I could hear downstairs my friends laughing, Sanji and Zoro fighting, Luffy shouting. Luckily everybody would make Lami feel comfortable, after all. Law was still sobbing over my lap.

After several minutes I decided to speak up. “Law, stop, you are not the one who should be crying asking me for forgiveness. You did nothing wrong. I was completely mistaken. I hope you will be able to forgive me someday”, I said, gaining composure in order to make things clear.

He sat back, looked at me with teary eyes and asked, “someday? There is nothing to forgive. I want to be with you, I … L…”

“Oi, you two, stop crying, Lami is leaving”, said Nami leaning on the door frame, smiling at us. As she left, and Law wiped the tears off my cheeks, we stood up from bed. I was still dressed so we headed downstairs right away.

“Sis, let’s go, I don’t quite remember how to get your home from here, so you tell me”, said Law. Lami looked at him with loving eyes, and said, “My big brother is always taking care of me, I missed you doc”. Law’s cheeks became red, and he hid under the white with black spots cap he was wearing.

Lami said goodbye to everybody, except me, “she probably hates me”, I thought.

I was going to wish her a good night, when Lami held my hand and pulled from me. “Let’s go sister-in-law, come with us!”. I followed them into the car unsure if Law wanted me there, because he was still embarrassed as hell.

I let Law’s sister sit on the passenger seat, and I sat on the back seat behind Lami. A few seconds after Law started the car Lami said, “Oi, Y/n! did you know that Law has never ever introduced a girlfriend to the family before?”. I choked a little when I heard her say “girlfriend”, and simply chuckled. Law told her to stop, but Lami continued telling me how “emo” he was when he was an adolescent, making fun of his sibling.

We finally arrived at Lami's house. It was a traditional Jeju stone house, with big windows and a typical korean roof construction. On the entrance was a tall guy wearing a cap with “PENGUIN” written on it, waving at us. Law parked the car next to a black Hyundai Ioniq.

“Oi!! brother-in-law!!! How are you? It’s been a year my dear friend!” the guy at the door told Law. We descended the car, and the guy hugged Law in a way “man” do. Lami introduced me to the man, he was his boyfriend, and they had been living together for a few years, and apparently before dating Lami, Penguin knew Law since they were little.

We went inside, and had coffee while chatting about everything. I didn’t feel uncomfortable at any moment, Lami and Penguin were really warm people.

Law’s sister and I headed to the kitchen. It was a perfect opportunity to ask her about their parents so I thought of the best way to bring up the subject. I didn’t need to, because it was the first thing that Lami mentioned.

“Y/n, I’m sure my cold brother didn’t tell you anything about our parents… right?”, she said. I was helping her putting some mochi onto a plate, so I looked at her and said “Not really… At first I thought Rosinante was his father, but then I realized that his surname was Trafalgar, not Donquixote”.

“That’s right, Rosinante is something like Law’s dad. When my brother was 10 years old, my parents passed away in a car accident. They were both doctors, the best ones of this city. Law looks exactly like my dad when he was younger…”, she stopped for a little, and continued, “We stayed with our grandparents at the moment. After two years, Law became really ill and had to be taken to Seoul for some doctors to cure him. Luckily, Rosinante was a volunteer at the children’s hospital where Law was being treated. After six months of intense treatment, he recovered and forged a friendship with “Corasan” who took care of him… Oh sorry, I meant, Rosinante. Corasan it’s just a nickname Law gave him during… the chemotherapy...”, she concluded.

“Oh… poor baby…I’m sorry for your loss too, Lami” I said, feeling a lump in my throat. “Don’t worry, we are all right now, time has passed”, she said, grabbing my hand softly and smiling. She continued, “but let me tell you something, I’ve never seen Law with that type of twinkle in his eyes in the 24 years I’ve known him. He loves you; I can sense that. Plus, when you left the bar earlier, he became so desperate, he was truly worried about losing you”.

I blushed instantly, yet, I was so happy of hearing how he probably loves me that I giggled. And Lami, too.

From the living room we heard Law calling me, “Bab… Y/n-ya, let’s go home it is pretty late”. “Ah… my sweet loving brother and his ways…”, Lami said with a sarcastic tone, rolling back eyes. We both laughed and headed where the boys were.

“Oi Penguin, do you have a bottle of cold water? I tend to get thirsty when I drive”, Law asked Penguin and looked at me with some sort of look I can only label as… horny?. “Right, bro, let me get you one”, said the cool cap guy and headed to the kitchen. “He gets thirsty?” I said to myself a little confused, but dismissed the thought as my attention went to Lami who was showing me a photo of his brother when he was a little baby.

The happy couple invited us to the lantern festival that was taking place the next night at the historical center of the city. They told us to bring all of our friends too. We were excited about it, so we accepted the invitation and left the house.

During the ride along a road by the sea, Law asked me, “Babe, can you please turn the GPS on?, I don’t really know where I am going…”. I searched for my phone in my pockets, but realized I’ve left it at home. “I didn’t bring my phone… give me yours”, I told him. He grabbed his from the black jeans pocket and gave it to me. “Law, your phone is dead…”, I said, trying to turn it on.

“Yeah, my battery died after calling you twenty times when you left the bar…”, he said, kinda joking. “Oh…”, I gasped, and continued, “Well, let me enter the address on the car sat nav”.

I approached my hand to the little screen when Law stopped my hand and smirked. “It would be a shame if the computer wouldn’t work and we ended up lost…”.

“You clearly had this planned, right?” I said arching a brow. “Me, planning things? that’s not something I usually do…”, he said in a sarcastic way, but with a sexy tone that made me somehow fidget on my seat.

I came closer to his face and almost talking next to his ear I said, “Let’s get lost”. Law licked his lips, placed his right hand over my lap and said “Heh, sure… I can’t resist myself anymore”.

He suddenly turned the wheel and took a little road that took us to the beach. Finally, my lover parked the car, luckily it was a deserted zone, a cliff area, and there weren’t any houses or places nearer.

The beach ahead of us was lightened by an intense moonshine, the sea was choppy so the waves hit hard on the cliffs.

Law threw his seat back and patted his lap, “Strip for me, and come here, baby”. “Ah, so we are fucking on the car, nice…” I thought and began to take my clothes off.

“Don’t take that off, yet. You know that little bandanna you have on your head could help us…”, he said to me after I jumped over his lap. I felt a rock hard bulge under my core, he was already so ablaze for me.

He then untied the cloth that was holding my hair, smirked at me, and said “may I?” while covering my eyes with it.

“Lay you back on the steering wheel, baby girl”, he ordered me. I remember instantly how he likes to dominate me, so I followed his order to a “Yes, sir”.

His fingers ran from my mouth to my neck. He kept lowering them softly caressing my flesh. I could barely feel the touch of his fingers over my skin. He wasn’t talking, and I was unaware of what was coming next, I was blindfolded, but surrendered completely to this man.

All of a sudden I felt a cold sensation over one of my nipples, “Uhg…” I moaned, throwing my head back. Then the chilly stinging feeling moved to my other nipple. God, what is that?... and suddenly remember Law asking Penguin the cold water bottle. “Damn you, Law”, I said to myself but only being able to verbalize moans and grunts.

He began to trail an icy path from my breasts to my lower stomach. My heated skin mixed with the cold water that began to melt over my flesh, felt like a sweet torture.

“Your hot body is making the icy water melt and wet my jeans… or is it perhaps your own arousal for your Master, baby girl?”, he said to me, while running a thumb over my clit.

He then penetrated me with two fingers as he only knew how to, took them off and asked me to open my mouth. “Taste yourself, baby girl”, he commanded me, and I opened my mouth and sucked.

I heard - and felt- how he unzipped his jeans, and slowly took his member out. I could feel how he began to softly hit his manhood over my sex. He was playing with it, but my body couldn’t wait for it to be inside of me.

“Is it getting hot in here, huh?” he said and unbuttoned his black shirt. I knew it because he then grabbed my hands making me caress his skin. My hands wandered along his chest, but my mind was only focusing on how much I wanted to be penetrated by this man.

I was drowning in lust, I needed him to do something, but he didn’t. “Law… Sir… What are you doing?... fuck me, I want you to fuck me…”. He laughed, and violently but gently enough he pinched and twisted one of my erect nipples. A strike of intense pleasure hit my center, and it was so unexpected that I only purred at it.

He then ran his inked fingers through my hair and pulled me closer to his face, this time he wasn’t being gentle, he was being rough… and I loved it. “What do you think you are doing? I am the one who gives you orders in here, are we clear?” he said, whispering with a grunt in my ear.

“Y-yes sir, I- am sorry…”, I said, stuttering. “Good”, he said and kissed me. We made out, hard, feverishly. I could feel over my entrance how his sex became even harder.

He suddenly put his hands on each side of my waist and lifted me up a little bit, so I could place my knees on each side of the seat. He used his right hand to guide his pennis inside of me. It was just the tip of it, he was enjoying how I was probably miming the words “fuck me” repeatedly. After a few seconds of torture, he grabbing me again from my waist, pushed me down against his lap. “Ugh..” I said, opening my mouth, throwing my back to the steering wheel, so hard that I made the car horn sound.

I wanted to be penetrated, and he did it so roughly, yet so pleasantly.

I began to ride him, back, forward, up, down, tracing circles with my pelvis. My left knee hit the emergency brake handle, it hurt but I didn’t care. I placed my hands over his strong abs, letting all of my senses focus on the pleasure, imagining the expression he had on his face when I heard him groan.

Law pulled my hair and threw my neck back, again making me hit my back on the wheel, and used his hips to bang me, hard, burying himself into me. Every thrust made my body react with little spams; I was being sent to heaven.

Law untied the bandanna that was covering my eyes, and said in between the thrusts and an agitated voice, “I want to see your precious face when I make you cum”. My eyes slowly returned to its functions, admiring the sweaty thorax of Law, the way his stomach would go up and down picturing his rapid breathing. His face showed a red glowing, he was more than aroused. I was too, and as I reached for climax, placing my right hand over the steamy glass of the car window, Law did too with a hard “Huh”.

He bathed my insides once again. I remained still enjoying the warming sensation inside of me, trying to erase any worry at the time.

Law placed a hand on my back and pulled me closer to his chest, while lying his neck over the headrest of the yellow Sonata.

I rested my whole tired body over his, enjoying the touch of our warm skins, the scent of his body, with my lips wandering along his neck, leaving soft kisses over its skin.

“We should go back home; they might get a little bit concerned…” I told Law, still over him. “Yeah, you are right, let’s go back…”.

It was 4 am so once we got home and opened the door, we entered stealthily. I walked behind Law when he suddenly stopped, and I fell over him. “What is it, Law?!” I whispered, “I don’t know, this is kind of a slumber party…”, he whispered back at me.

Suddenly all the lights turned on. Everybody was sleeping on bare mattresses on the floor of the living room.

Little by little our friends but Zoro and Sanji woke up.

“Oh my god, finally…” said Nami and everyone began to laugh. They weren’t laughing at us, but at Sanji and Zoro who were sleeping cuddled.

Law looked at them and looked at everybody else and said, “Excuse me, is this something new to you? Oi Mugiwara-ya, tell them every time you three get to sleep at home they do the same”. Luffy nodded, still laughing.

No matter how much noise they made, nor Zoro or Sanji woke up, they seemed to be happily enjoying sleeping like this, so we didn’t want to bother them anymore.

“Let’s go back to sleep, guys. Y/n and Law you can sleep upstairs, we left Law’s bed intact”, said Franky winking at us. “Thank you!!” I said, and we went upstairs jumping through the multiple legs of our friends.

We climbed up the stairs, and went into the boy’s room. I was undressing when suddenly Law offered me a big loose t-shirt. “Don’t get me wrong I love your naked body, but what if the boys enter the room and see you naked?”, he said. “Oh, Law, are you jealous? hahaha”, I mocked him. “Well, let's not discuss jealousy…”, he said frowning.

I grabbed his white loose t-shirt with some kind of black power ranger called “Stealth Black” printed on it and put it on, giggling. I could have sworn he was a geeky nerd, and that was the proof.

Law and I jumped into his bed and muffled up with the bedding. He hugged me, kissing my head. “Thank you for making this the best holiday of my whole life…”, he said. “Thank you for paying the bus ticket that time…”, I whispered with my face pressed up against his chest. We both laughed and soon after fell asleep.

I woke up with the sounds of some birds chirping on the window. Law was still asleep beside me, with his ruffled hair, his cheek pressed against the pillow with his mouth open, snoring softly. I couldn’t help but drool over that image, so handsome even like that, the intimacy, the person I wanted to wake up to each morning.

I placed my head over the tattoos of his chest, following with my index finger the lines of ink on his skin. I remained there for a few minutes hearing his heartbeat, drunk of his skin scent.

Softly he began caressing my cheek, still without opening his eyes. He was probably half asleep yet.

I felt a million butterflies trapped on my stomach, I was so in love, I had fallen for this guy, hard. I felt a little guilty, I mean, how was I supposed to fall in love so quickly with a man?... I guess it was just love at first sight…

Law’s hand stopped moving, and suddenly I heard him mumble something like, “Mmmm- hum - I-I- love you Y/n-ya”. I widened my eyes, “did he just say he loves me? “I was completely surprised and even unsure if that was what he said or if it was just my imagination.

Some minutes later, he opened his eyes, slowly. “Good morning, baby girl”, he said, kissing my forehead. I was immobile, watching his face still trying to process what he had just said. “What is it?, are you sleeping with your eyes open? you are gorgeous but that would be a little creepy”, he said, surprised.

“N-No, uhm, I am awake, yes. Good morning”, I uttered. “Are you ok, Y/n-ya?”, he asked with a confused expression. “Yeah, uhm… Law… Do you sleep talk?”, I inquired him. “Oh… did I? I’m sorry... I do, yes. Sometimes. What did I say?”, he said this time with a worried expression. “Oh, no, nothing, I thought I heard something but I don’t know. It’s nothing”, I said, trying to settle the matter.

We remained cuddling up a little bit more, until we heard movements downstairs. They were probably waking up, so I decided to go to my room and get ready for the day.

“New pajamas”, I thought while taking off Law’s shirt. I folded and put it on my suitcase, I wasn’t willing to give it back to him.

I went ahead and showered. I let the warm water bathe my skin while thinking about Law saying “I love you” while he was asleep. Was he really? Did he really feel that or was it just a dream?... I guess I should wait…

After the bath, which clearly made me more anxious than relaxed, I went downstairs to the kitchen where Sanji was already preparing breakfast. I decided to help him with setting the table while chatting about the lantern festival of that night. Nami, Vivi and Robin joined us and were pleased that Lami and Penguin invited us to such a pretty event.

Our last day in Jeju passed with us visiting the Samseonghyeol Shrine, which is the oldest historic site in Korea. That place is considered as the birthplace of three demigods of the island, founders of the Tanma Kingdom that governed Jeju Island before the Joseon dynasty took over.

At noon we came back from the city and began to get ready for the festival that night. I received a message from Lami, “@TraffLami.06 > hello Sis! How is the day going? Is my brother treating you right?. Listen, we usually wear “hanbok” to the festival. If you want to too, you can rent them from a friend's shop. I send the location. See you tonight! ♥”. I got super excited for it, I loved cultural clothing and I wanted to see Law wearing those clothes too. I told my friends and we all agreed on renting one. Law, being the warm boy he was, wasn't so sure about it, but with a little kiss and a little begging I could convince him.

The night came and we all drove to the historical centre of Jeju. The place was all garnished with paper lanterns, string lights hanging from some bridges, lit inflatable displays, food courts, typical music being played that mixed with the buzz of hundreds of attendants that were enjoying the night.

I was wearing a hanbok in yellow and orange tones, while Law used a green and black one. He looked like a typical groom; I couldn’t help but fantasize a little about us getting married someday.

Luffy of course ran to the food stalls followed by everybody else, Zoro went ahead and attacked the stall where they were offering some kind of soju and Law and I waited for his sister and Penguin to arrive at where we were.

Law was more silent than usual and his face showed concerned. I thought at first about him missing his parents or family, maybe the festival triggered some memories, so I held his hand without saying anything. He squeezed my hand, and began to sweat.

“Are you ok, doc?”, I asked. He looked at me, I could sense he got really nervous and finally mumbled, “Y/n-ya we need to talk…” …

Part 6, FINAL