#( expect activities from me later on. )

[sergle]

I think my favorite thing about doing ginger red hair instead of cherry red hair is: lying to people about it

[icewindandboringhorror]

boy in silly sitting positions compilation

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

why didn't anyone tell me that Hannibal is a comedy

[atomiclace]

who knew that some agere people would be the worst type of people to exist (talking about you spinny)

[amu-brain-dump]

It is six in the morning over there! On a weekend! Wyd 🌇🌤️🥞

Yes it is 🤣 way too early if you ask me... I'm going to work cause even breathing is expensive now. But I just took a pretty sunrise picture heheh I'll post it a bit later

[starpros-sunshine]

You know. I'm part of the fraction "to each their own and let people handle their lives however they see best fit". But I do feel the need to say that I have seldom seen such an idiotic assumption as that breaking up with someone four days before someone's birthday when you also want that someone to do something for their birthday even though you know you and your soon-to-be-ex will both have to be there won't end with that person just not doing anything with anyone for their birthday. Partially because nobody wants that kind of awkwardness after a fresh breakup and also because the soon-to-be-ex has the lovely habit of wallowing in self pity and making everything about how they have it so bad. You know I just think in such cases you should've waited a week with the breakup. I don't care how much you want to fuck that other guy but I really think you should've waited a week.

[brin-bellway]

Ooh! Brin!

Is your fiction anywhere we can read it?

Or is it only secret, and private?

The current one is semi-private, but most of my fiction is publicly available at the Glowfic Constellation (a roleplay/collaborative-writing site: some rat-Tumblrites may recognise it as "that format planecrash / Project Lawful was written in").

Glowfic is an infamously high-context medium and needs a certain amount of tolerance for reading things without having read their prerequisites, but you can get a head start on understanding the background context relevant to my stuff by reading How to Read Glowfic and the glowfic wiki page on medianworlds (people who understood the phrase "the format planecrash was written in" may recognise this as the relationship Keltham's homeworld has to Eliezer Yudkowsky).

[amrv-5]

seeing all this fellow travelers content… feeling Intrigued… Looking Respectfully……. can i ask what it is & would you recommend?

HELLO!!!!! Okay yes I would recommend, I thought it was a great watch, I enjoyed myself! I have more thoughts on it but I'll save 'em cause spoilers--generally: It follows a number of queer relationships / characters over the course of the Lavender Scare through the 1980s. Its primary focus is the relationship between Hawkins, a WWII vet and midlevel govt. bureaucrat; and Tim, a congressional staffer fresh out of college. They meet during the height of the Lavender Scare and begin a fraught romance as they struggle with their own careers in DC, political complicity, and identities personal and public. The show covers about 30 years of their lives together (and apart). Go into it expecting solid performances (incredible Jonathan Bailey vehicle, at the very least) and (imo) fun if slightly uneven structuring, but also know (I don't want to sell it as Fun Gay Love Story!) by virtue of time period and what it's most interested in, story spends most of its runtime trying to show how national attitudes and even seemingly very localized political machinations impacted the lives of queer and especially queer Black people.

[magicdyke]

dude is just not smart

[watching-constellations]

I think people need to accept that there's more than one way to be human. That may sound really obvious, but I'm not talking about identities, or opinions, or looks. What I'm saying is that not everybody wants to do a silly little dance. At all. Ever. It doesn't have anything to do with embarrassment or shyness or ability. Some people just don't want to.

I've been going to this dog training school with my new puppy recently, and one of the things they're having us do is train our dogs to stay put in a sit while we do a silly little dance next to them. I know this exercise is meant to be approachable to standard beginner trainers, but I can't even begin to describe how anxious I was when the trainer told us to do this. I remembered years of getting in trouble at summer camps for not participating in icebreakers and name games, being called a spoilsport in school, being called cold and distant as a teenager, and even been made fun of in a mean-spirited way and getting trouble in college for opting out of "group bonding activities". I refused to do the silly little dance. Instead, I've distracted my dog by shaking and dropping objects, stepping over her, sitting down, doing pushups, whatever. To my surprise, the trainer complimented me on my choice, and I could finally breathe.

It's not that I can't dance— I've trained as a dancer for years. It's not that I don't like being silly, or that I don't want to look stupid. I make myself look stupid on purpose on a regular basis because it's fun, and I love a good joke. It's just that there has to be consent for this to be fun. I don't need to loosen up and enjoy myself. I won't enjoy myself, because I don't want to do the silly little dance. I never want to do the silly little dance (not alone, not in a group). I don't want to be loud and yell, I don't want to do a call and response game, I don't want to mirror your body movements, I don't want to play zip zap zop, and I don't want to introduce myself with an animal that shares the same letter as my first name. It's not that I'm shy or quiet or even introverted— I just don't want to do it. I don't connect that way. It's not fun for me, it's miserable.

There is nothing wrong with any of this. I do not deserve to face any kind of repercussions for not wanting to do the dance. I'm not less fun because of it. I want to play tug of war with you— hand me the end of the rope. Sit down and let's tell a story. Let's make dumb jokes about street names and let the energy bounce off of each other and crackle. If our group plays mafia, no one will ever know I'm the killer. Come walk with me through the woods, and let's look for bugs under rocks and logs. We can eat lunch on the ground and poke at the moss.

I've spent so long thinking something was wrong or broken with me because I didn't want to do the silly little dance. I like dignity. I like elegance. It's not that I'm pretentious, it's that I like being ridiculous on and within my terms only.

Honestly, I was worried that, when I decided to get a dog, I wouldn't be the right kind of person to train one. I mean, have you seen how people act around dogs? I was worried that my lack of external bouncy enthusiasm, and profound disdain of doing squeaky voices, would make my training and my relationship with my dog fail. I thought I wasn't the right person for a dog, because I'm not even really the right person for a person. Turns out, I don't need any of that. Every now and then, because she's a puppy, people come up to Evie in their standard "dog-mode". Whenever they start doing... whatever it is people think they're doing with dogs... Evie pauses and looks up at me. I swear she's asking me what the hell is wrong with them. And, well, all I can do is sigh and shrug. She waits patiently for them to stop with their bouncing and squealing, and then cheerfully greets them when they're done. It doesn't seem like my dog wants to do the silly little dance either.

[aroacettorney]

perhaps the reason why aup ended like *that* is because it was not supposed to have a happy ending in the first place, but sayren didnt have the guts to deal with readers' backlash for when they finally kill off the main character so a half baked happy ending is what we get 😔

[scalproie]

FAVORITISM IS ONLY OKAY WHEN ITS ABOUT A CHARACTER I LIKE

[sege-h]

The kids are not only not alright but theyre just downright stupid rn

[thebiballerina]

I mostly concur with the above reblogger, but I wanted to add one thing:

I wouldn't say that anything you do will have zero impact. There are SOME things you can do that will have an impact, if you choose to put your time and energy into this issue. (Which you are not obligated to do, to be clear, unless you have some sort of role or job which implies that sort of responsibility.)

You aren't necessarily helpless. But subscribing to OP's mindset is a really good way to make yourself helpless.

I've seen that mindset, repeatedly. I had that mindset, at one point in time. You know what changed that, more than anything else? Becoming an actual activist.

The activists who hold on to the mindset that a mental health break is selfish? The ones that can't or won't emotionally distance themselves? The ones that don't acknowledge their right to care for themselves because someone, somewhere is suffering worse than them? They don't last, and they don't help.

The good ending for that road is to burn out, and then not be able to help anymore. The bad ending is to fall heavily into compassion fatigue, and then be so desensitized and unable to care that you cause real harm. Or there's the other bad ending, which is that you neglect yourself so thoroughly that you end up hurt, sick, or dead (and maybe hurt others while you are at it). You might even manage to do all three of these things.

If you want to make a real impact on more than a minuscule scale, you not only need to allow yourself mental health breaks (which, yes, sometimes include disengaging completely), you need to accept that they aren't selfish at all. They are sometimes the only way you'll be able to preserve your ability to help. Feeling personally affected by an issue is valid, and sometimes unavoidable, but it doesn't correlate to how much of a difference you make.

Hurting yourself doesn't automatically help others. Many of us have heard metaphor which references the airplane safety instruction to put on your oxygen mask before helping others do so. It's a good metaphor. A suffocating person isn't going to thank you for the valiant gesture of suffocating yourself alongside them, when you had the option to save the both of you.

I believe in sacrifice, in some cases. I believe in acknowledging my privilege. But sacrifice generally implies that you are giving something up to help someone else. If you are just giving something up… it's more suffering in the world, not less.

Do you want to actually help? I bet you there are activism campaigns that would love to have you, in a variety of forms and levels of commitment. Including entirely remote efforts, if you aren't in a position or location to engage in in-person efforts. That goes for any cause, not just this one.

And you'll make a lot more difference in that sphere if you prioritize your impact, instead of your devotion to the issue.

i think anyone who is genuinely worried about their mental health bc of the situation in gaza probably needs to reformat their way of thinking about it. the answer is not to take a “mental health break” where you pretend whats happening in gaza doesnt exist and stop being vocal and refuse to hear people around you who are vocal. the way to do that “mental health break” much more effectively and not selfishly would be to remove yourself from constant streams of idiotic and/or murderously evil people. stop watching tiktok debates. stop reading genocidal reddit comments and news articles from sources you KNOW want palestine dead. stop putting the focus on the murderers and keep your attention on sympathy and love for the murdered, on hope and optimism (even if naive) and activism to do your part in making things better. dont get me wrong the murderers still need to be dealt with but if you as an individual feel like you’re getting too overwhelmed with despair to be helpful, the answer is to shift your focus away from those causing the despair, not to ignore and abandon those who have to actually live through it.

[ontologicalmoki]

unsolicited parenting advice of the day tell your kids what to expect! If your two year old is anxious about when dad is going to get home from work, teach him to recognize what patterns indicate that dad is coming home soon! After lunch we will do an activity and then clean and THEN dad will get home. Listen when the calendar day starts with an S dad does not have to go to work!!

and if something goes wrong and today does NOT go according to the plan your little guy expects, tell him!! Hey, dad has to go to work after all today, but he will be home after lunch! Today dad has to get groceries after work, so he’ll be home later than normal. But he will return with more bananas! Focus on the positives too, give them things they can understand. Don’t just say “not today,” they understand the concept of grocery stores and unexpected trips. Just tell them the problem. You’d hate being in the dark about everything that happens to you also. Let them control their situation, even if it’s just their own emotions and expectations.

or even! Teach them to read an analogue clock! Let me tell you, church nursery in the 1.5-3.5 age group got so much less stressful and anxious for EVERYONE when I taught my kids how to read the clock. They don’t have to ask me anymore how much time is left and fish for answers I can’t give them. They know that their guardians will come for them when the long stripe on the clock touches the 2, and that if they aren’t there then then they’re LATE and they get to hold this over their parents head. Because they know their parents can be late. And they LOVE knowing when this has occurred. There is so much less anxiety.

anyway explain stuff to your kids, they want to know. This has been an unsolicited parenting advice PSA

[gender-euphowrya]

replayed portal...... God this game really was a god damn masterpiece through and through