#and so I will

[phantom-dancing]

Nobody talks Abt Henry Jekyll's emo phase nearly enough tbh

[watching-constellations]

I think people need to accept that there's more than one way to be human. That may sound really obvious, but I'm not talking about identities, or opinions, or looks. What I'm saying is that not everybody wants to do a silly little dance. At all. Ever. It doesn't have anything to do with embarrassment or shyness or ability. Some people just don't want to.

I've been going to this dog training school with my new puppy recently, and one of the things they're having us do is train our dogs to stay put in a sit while we do a silly little dance next to them. I know this exercise is meant to be approachable to standard beginner trainers, but I can't even begin to describe how anxious I was when the trainer told us to do this. I remembered years of getting in trouble at summer camps for not participating in icebreakers and name games, being called a spoilsport in school, being called cold and distant as a teenager, and even been made fun of in a mean-spirited way and getting trouble in college for opting out of "group bonding activities". I refused to do the silly little dance. Instead, I've distracted my dog by shaking and dropping objects, stepping over her, sitting down, doing pushups, whatever. To my surprise, the trainer complimented me on my choice, and I could finally breathe.

It's not that I can't dance— I've trained as a dancer for years. It's not that I don't like being silly, or that I don't want to look stupid. I make myself look stupid on purpose on a regular basis because it's fun, and I love a good joke. It's just that there has to be consent for this to be fun. I don't need to loosen up and enjoy myself. I won't enjoy myself, because I don't want to do the silly little dance. I never want to do the silly little dance (not alone, not in a group). I don't want to be loud and yell, I don't want to do a call and response game, I don't want to mirror your body movements, I don't want to play zip zap zop, and I don't want to introduce myself with an animal that shares the same letter as my first name. It's not that I'm shy or quiet or even introverted— I just don't want to do it. I don't connect that way. It's not fun for me, it's miserable.

There is nothing wrong with any of this. I do not deserve to face any kind of repercussions for not wanting to do the dance. I'm not less fun because of it. I want to play tug of war with you— hand me the end of the rope. Sit down and let's tell a story. Let's make dumb jokes about street names and let the energy bounce off of each other and crackle. If our group plays mafia, no one will ever know I'm the killer. Come walk with me through the woods, and let's look for bugs under rocks and logs. We can eat lunch on the ground and poke at the moss.

I've spent so long thinking something was wrong or broken with me because I didn't want to do the silly little dance. I like dignity. I like elegance. It's not that I'm pretentious, it's that I like being ridiculous on and within my terms only.

Honestly, I was worried that, when I decided to get a dog, I wouldn't be the right kind of person to train one. I mean, have you seen how people act around dogs? I was worried that my lack of external bouncy enthusiasm, and profound disdain of doing squeaky voices, would make my training and my relationship with my dog fail. I thought I wasn't the right person for a dog, because I'm not even really the right person for a person. Turns out, I don't need any of that. Every now and then, because she's a puppy, people come up to Evie in their standard "dog-mode". Whenever they start doing... whatever it is people think they're doing with dogs... Evie pauses and looks up at me. I swear she's asking me what the hell is wrong with them. And, well, all I can do is sigh and shrug. She waits patiently for them to stop with their bouncing and squealing, and then cheerfully greets them when they're done. It doesn't seem like my dog wants to do the silly little dance either.

[nylwnder]

JACUZZI SAID EAT ME

[reginrokkr]

Just finished playing Caribert's AQ right now and I have many impressions that I'll write here, subject to be expanded more once I put my thoughts in order (will be posting a small guide to myself of the topics I'll discuss in more depth).

✦ Firstly, about Kaeya. In all honesty it's been a great relief to me to see that eventually he isn't the prince of Khaenri'ah. As I mentioned several months ago here, regencies are a temporary substitution for the actual king in succession and they aren't inheritable. Hopefully for Kaeya lovers out there, his implication in the lore didn't disappoint as I find it really interesting for multiple reasons: 1) he's a descendant of the Abyss Order founder Clothar Alberich and 2) the fact that he, who doesn't seem to be a pure blood Khaenri'ahn (ironically, I've talked about this with a couple of friends because his pupils were different from Dain's and later on to Halfdan's, but I wanted to keep off mentioning this here until we see more Khaenri'ahns to make a bolder statement, it was good to see that it was cleared up), was born to begin with and he seems to have aged well over past Caribert's age and look relatively fine (I say relatively because there is a lot missing here) is a miracle in itself. Specially considering that it's stated that any kid born from Khaenri'ahn blood and someone else pertaining to the reign of the Seven (I'll get to this on a different point) will be born in suffering until inevitably they become a hilichurl.

✧ Secondly, it was very interesting to see the notion of pure blood Khaenri'ahn and how the eyes are a very good lead to tell one from another apart (in this case Kaeya being the only one thus far, I believe). It's even more interesting that there is this differentiation vs the reign of the Seven as this would seal the deal about Khaenri'ahn people belonging to the Era of the Saints and that something must've happened for them to turn their backs to the gods. I'll go longer in a separate post for this concept. Oh, and the different curses and how it was actually teased in We Will Be Reunited: curse of immortality for the "great sinners", the pure blood Khaenri'ahn, and curse of wilderness to those of mixed blood to become hilichurls.

✦ Thirdly, the abyss twin (I'll refer to them as Lumine from now on as that is what seems to be canon in promotional material released by HYV for convenience sake). Scaramouche had teased in his own AQ that "The reason why there are records about your sister in Irminsul... it might have something to do with Khaenri'ah. Apparently, Khaenri'ah was her first destination when she arrived in this world. Plus, she only came to this world because the heavens responded to the summoning." Said summoning being this strong wish to control the Abyss as "if not even the gods can, if Khaenri'ah could, then they'd be able to control everything" and since Lumine was referred as the Abyss herself, this may imply that both she and Aether came to Teyvat via the Abyss (this calls for speculation that the actual true sky may be the Abyss, I'll also be talking about this in a different post). One thing that I don't buy is the fact that she was made princess of Khaenri'ah just like that. I get that this is coming from a position of worship I believe, as people thought that she would bring them new strength and hope, but it's something that I can't help but think that once again is about this factor of the twins having to interfere in everything, partly due to self insert purposes even though Lumine wouldn't count as this, but they're related. Moreover, it's a bit funny to me that Khaenri'ahns would turn their back to the gods but would trust an alien lol (again, I'll go deeper about this in another post but it's reminiscent of how the Second Who Came arrived to Teyvat and I'd dare to put my finger on fire to say that they came from the Abyss too, will expand on this at a later point). To conclude this point, I believe that Lumine must've contributed to the descent of the gods to Khaenri'ah hence she may be doing what she's doing these days out of guilt among other reasons (this is a deduction based in one of Dain's quotes in Collei's miscellany, will get into that in this other post).

✧ Fourth, about the Abyss, Fortune Lector, the Sinner, Clothar and Caribert. This utterly amazed me entirely and I can't wait to make some research to some sources of information to tie better my thoughts on this. I also have some suspicions about who this Sinner may be, but for obvious reasons it's speculating as it can be someone we haven't been introduced to yet. 1000/10 about this. All I'll say is that I know I'll have to look again into the heralds and lectors' descriptions alongside another series of items, so hang in there for me on that one. It's promising.

✦ Lastly, about Dain (lmao). Sorry, it's a bit funny to me that Dain is like the least here and I did wish there was more about him for how little screentime he has and only once a year. But let me tell you that I'm very curious about the fact that despite not having lived what Lumine did, his subconscious and instincts told him that something happened there. Not only that, but guess what direction he took to investigate more when he left both times? Exactly, the direction Caribert took when he left the cottage. I was also interested in how erosion affects him too. Oh, but also— where the heck was Dain 500 years ago if he did go with Lumine to Sumeru too? How the hecky the Aranara just talk about her? I knew something wasn't right when I decided to go divergent in that regard.

This is all for now. It may look like it's a lot but after revisiting the information I want to revisit, there will be more coming up. Overall this quest was great despite my major discrepancy with Lumine being the princess of Khaenri'ah, but as for the rest it was a really great ride. Can't wait to see Dain for his next yearly outing next year 😔

[feline-insolitum]

man whenever i express wanting to wait until christmas or my birthday to get something because i dont want to spend my own money for fear that ill get reprimanded my parents will be like "youre allowed to spend money!! youre not a burden for spending your money that you have that isnt our money in any way!!!" so then i go and spend my own money and they reprimand me and yell at me for spending my money

????????????? absolutely baffling.

[morningdewflop]

today i want to draw boys kissing

[algolstare]

it is frustrating to realize oh hey, yay, a sudden burst of energy! at three in the morning. i need sleep very badly, but if i go to sleep, i am going to wake up exhausted and this sudden energy will be completely gone. there will be no productivity if i sleep. i could get so much done if i rode this wave however far it will take me

[owlfacenightkit]

I’m so sick of live action shows being allowed to have all the seasons they want but then animation getting canned as soon as it starts to gain a following. Stranger Things is getting a fifth season while Infinity Train had to struggle for its whole existence! Animated shows are getting cancelled left and right!! These companies are just driven by money and greed and they’ve turned art into commercialized entertainment. Well, I’m sick of it. I wish that those companies would realize the value and beauty in animation

And on a similar note, why is it that good shows get cancelled almost immediately while garbage shows get to continue on for as long as they want?? Dana Terrace didn’t deserve to be silenced! She should have been able to tell her story the whole way through!

I personally think there’s not much worse than cancellation. It’s a story and if it’s cut short it can’t be told the way the creator wanted it to be

In short, I am sick and tired of everything that’s been taking place over the last couple of years in animation. I used to want to go into animation. Not anymore. Not to a company that will kill my dreams and steal what I love. I want to support indie animation, games, movies, anything. Indie creators. They’re doing what they love. Yes, it’s hard. Yes, it takes a lot of work because they’re not on an actual show- or movie-sized budget

But it is so, so worth it

[ugartecoco]

the transition im crying

[riacte]

not romantic not platonic but a secret third thing [what would happen between earth and the moon if the earth stopped spinning as illustrated by xkcd randall munroe]

[wizardpotions]

Christmas as a cultural icon is starting to get really dystopian in a climate sense, december has historically been a time of year in which there would be snow in a significant portion of europe and north america, and the fact that its not even icy this time of year and all the christmas songs and decorations reference a time of year that will likely never exist in the same way again in my life time is so strange.

[gwenlena]

hello tumblr

[kaereth]

Dragon harpy chimera birdy FALIN!! I love her

[lotrmusical]

never let anyone tell you that trawling through mediocre victorian poetry isn't worth it. we just happened upon an absolute BANGER of a worm poem. go read it or else 🪱🪱🪱

[flawlessflesh]

a mermaid duet, featuring our shining stars laios and thistle