#'what the fuck is a bagel?????'

[honeycombed-beloved]

started reading breaking dawn and no thoughts rn besides starting my own fic but the catch is there's Blue BBH and Red BBH and they're both fucked up paranormal/mythical things who are also twins and Red bbh took Cellbit, Pac, and his newest (somewhat shared with twin) charge is Dapper, while blue bbh took Bagi and is sharing Dapper as his "other dad"

one bbh is a nether changeling turned fae queen while his twin (before they both died) is just straight up a ghost who somehow aged outta sheer spite of wanting to age with his sibling and is ALSO a different fae queen by now.

blue teases red relentlessly about the french "star boy" who is ACTIVELY willing to make out with him, (it's also Pomme's dad, the french get gossiped about red so much,) Bagi and Cellbit have to cope with the fact Their Bad/Halo Is Not The Only One And Oh God They're Twins And Oh God Their Parentals Are ALSO TWINS????

bonuz points: no one expects the government to realize once they find out they harmed someone their kids hold value they are in the Deepest Fucking Shit This I s Worse Than If You Made A Deal with The Devil or Any Demon

@finnitesimal (I am tagging you because fuck man. Paranormal shit enemies to lovers/romeo and juilet style GETS ME y'know? I'll figure out pissa in this tomorrow)

[melodiousoblivionao3]

I have Questions

- is this just an ad or do we get a full length adventure of this

- what kind of money did they pay her

- what bet did she lose with Kelley or Rose or Lynn (I am also willing to bet money that at least one of them was in the background watching this)

- can we see BTS

- how did she manage to misspell a 4 word hashtag in her story promo

- how do I sign up to be in part two

[slightlytoastedbagel]

YOURE SHORTER THAN THE WHOLE PJSK CAST??? YOURE BUG SIZED??? /AFF

I answered a question about height on bluesky however I. did not know my height because I haven't measured it in years so I got out a 30cm ruler and did it absolute terrible style and according to that I'm. 142cm???

[nouearth]

[faaun]

procrastination is starting to have its consequences finally

[menlove]

we have a seasonal bagel at work w chorizo on it and what I've discovered is white people don't know how to say chorizo. I'm floored by this. it's literally chorizo.

[vexic929]

stress flareups are so stupid what do you MEAN my body's freaking the fuck out because my brain heard something it didn't like????????

[youngpettyqueen]

Headcanon based on nothing but I have because I think it’d be really funny is 4077 members absorbing Potter’s curses into their vocabulary and continuing to use them post-canon without even realizing it

[bedpissercastiel]

being an adult is fun because i can just. not eat the broken food and it's fine and my day isnt ruined by having to eat it or someone getting upset with me for not eating it

[androdragynous]

being disabled and rural really is just an endless cycle of > get tired of existing on the bare minimum > order food so you can have a real meal > pay double the cost of the food in fees > wait 2 hours > get food > it's wrong

[slightlytoastedbagel]

Wonderlands x Showtime but they recreate a LazyTown episode as a play

[lavampira]

btw I’ve still been watching grey’s anatomy and this truly gets more and more unhinged. and emotional. and unhinged.

[rosenfieids]

i watched across the spiderverse

[killlerfang1]

I'm surprised that Gwen didn't go into shock after eating the food at Jefferson's party considering the fact that she ate PLAIN FUCKING BAGELS for dinner

[doubletrucks]

got my coworkers bagels. because i love them. and they didn't want them so if anyone wants two bagels and a new coworker (me) hit my line

[terryfuckingturniptruck]

Men stop commenting on my food challenge.