#'sharer'

[gd-dollopole]

Let’s take into consideration:

Arthur would rather waste precious time before an important council meeting to run around the entire castle and search for Merlin, who, in his very honest opinion, is the worst servant of the entire kingdom or that he had ever known, than to call literally anyone else to help him dress (as if there wouldn’t be anyone ready to assist Arthur, their king, with clothes);

Arthur, and therefore Agravaine (which makes it all the more hilarious) knows every single place where Merlin could be, at that precise moment, or during that day in general; (EDIT: As someone pointed out in the comments, everyone and Agravaine included, knows who is the “dollophead”)

The guards nod to Agravaine without asking anything, which only means that it is canon that everyone in Camelot knows Merlin by name; EDIT: It also means that the guards deal with this on a daily basis. They must be tired.

The aforementioned point implies that everyone knows how Merlin looks like, that also means Merlin is known to never leave Arthur’s side, even during council meetings;

Arthur is running around the castle in what today we would call a pyjama, just because Merlin didn’t wake him up with, “Rise and Shine”. And he’s barefoot. That’s right. The king of Camelot, everyone, has just walked barefoot in Merlin’s chambers, in the armoury, where other knights probably are, and in the bloody stables (yes, the ones where the horses and their dungs both are), without boots on, just to look for Merlin;

Arthur is more distressed in this scene than in the one where Morgana declares war in season five. He’s fretting like a mother hen. Not only he is without breath, which means he was just coming back from his checking around, but he is red in the face and almost yelling in desperation. “Does he expect me to dress myself?!” Because apparently, Arthur literally cannot do anything without Merlin by his side. The way he says, “No sign of him” to Agravaine is so endearing, and he shouldn’t be this adorable. Unfair, Arthur. Really unfair.

Arthur just yells, (and distressingly looks around) in hope that Merlin will come back to him, because he always does. *sounds of my heart breaking into millions of pieces*

And last but not least, Arthur shouts, “Last night!”, which means the actual reason he’s going around searching for Merlin, it’s because he’s worried his world will end without his quirky and clumsy servant by his side (and the love of his life). Merlin is currently out on a quest with Gwaine to look for Gaius, since he has been kidnapped, but the problem is that Arthur doesn’t know this. What he knows is that he has fought with Merlin the day before about Gaius in the council chambers, and believes Merlin is gone for good, this time, and solely for the fight they had. Arthur feels more than guilty that he can’t make it up to his best friend, the love of his life (Agravaine helped Morgana kidnap Gaius, and it explains the ending of the scene, where he understands where Merlin is.) Now Arthur is worried that his last words to Merlin were harsh. He had last seen him when he was done with his duties the night before, and then Merlin disappeared.

No wonder they deleted this scene.

[calico-in-the-forest]

People don't talk about this scene enough, so I am going to.

[Found picture online after much searching]

Merlin fans tend to talk about the ending of the show, offering alternative endings which are interesting and exciting. However, I feel that not enough people appreciate those small scenes in Merlin that make all the difference.

This is a moment from the secret sharer (that one episode with our bestie Alator). The LIGHTING in this scene is phenomenal. The props and set design? Stunning. The camera angles? Beautiful. The way Colin Morgan is sat so that the light from the window hits his face at the perfect angle? Amazing.

There is so much thought and care in everything in this show, and don't even get me started on the music! The soundtrack is SO GOOD!! I understand the importance of major scenes and why they are talked about so much, but honestly it's the small moments that really make the show what it is for me.

[moxanji-real]

Just because someone is comfortable sharing their f/o doesn’t mean they value their relationship any less or take it less seriously than someone who doesn’t share. If sharing their f/o feels right for them, that’s perfectly okay and 100% valid! It doesn’t make their love or connection to that f/o any less meaningful.

[starshakez]

To my other non-sharing selfshippers

You are valid, your boundaries deserve to be respected, and you are not 'delusional' for not wanting to share. We really need to learn how to use the block button better in this community.

Why can't we just block and move on if we don't agree? No one is forcing you to interact or be mutuals with people you don't want to. It's your blog and we all deserve to have boundaries. This is your online space to do whatever you want with!

Remember that your f/o loves you so much, and they want you to prioritize your own comfort ♡

[deathdetermineslife]

(if u saw me post this the first time with the wrong poll length no you didn't)

[frankys-wife]

This is a post for all of the non-sharing self shippers out there!

YOU ARE VALID!

Stop listening to the mean part of your brain telling you that you're less valid than someone else, because your f/o's love you very very much! Yes, YOU, and only you! Your f/o's will ALWAYS reassure you on just how much they love you because you're the ONLY one they have eyes for! Through every universe, through every lifetime, through everyone else in this world and theirs. They'll always be YOURS, and they wanted me to remind you of that!

Nobody else can replicate the bond that you have with your f/o <3

PRO/COM/DARKSHIP DNI

[khaopybara]

meet kant and bison

[arcanespillo]

"The Secret Sharer"

Merlin, S4E07

[centurieslove]

rewatched 4x07 and this line left me dead in the street

[jpeg-indulgence]

Me: Pfft, don't worry, I got no problem sharing my f/o. At the end of the day they're all fictional characters, right?

Also me when I see anyone else self ship with my f/o:

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

Something about how Fire & Ice give up on going after Pearl directly, and instead both arrow in on dissing Marina-

Something about, Pearl having no shame at all, outright telling Frye right off that Off the Hook is here to “take control” and then literally talking over Frye’s turn. Frye’s snarking on how Pearl isn’t the boss here and no one’s cheering for her, ignored. How she goes after both Frye and Shiver asking where Frye’s big friend is to help her pass this test, moving right on to saying they’re both just goons making a mess anyway, little fish who should stay in they're bowl, but

that seems to give Frye the idea of hitting back with the “who’s backing you? Imaginary friends?” line… like Marina doesn’t even count as a music partner- or a friend?

Pearl literally yaps about Marina being divine, one of a kind, voice so fine, big mind- raps the lines off her cuff and the heart that's proudly pinned there

And Frye and Shiver go TARGET DETECTED. They lock onto Marina.

Shiver doesn’t bother trying to needle Marina about Pearl, the way their partners were each doing- if Pearl has no shame then at least she DOES still have a weakness, a soft spot, a thing she openly cares about- something they can try riling her up over

(problem: Pearl actually has all the confidence in Marina as a musician, partner, and performer. She's WATCHED Marina be all those things for YEARS now)

In the end Frye and Shiver just rile up the gay feels. Because Marina’s been living with a rapper who LOVES hyping her up even when they’re not on stage- Pearl who said she’d cut a fish for Marina. And if you don’t come to Inkopolis with a lot of self confidence, well then getting some from your girlfriend is fine too  

But it’s cute that Pearl’s still so obvious about being Marina's no. 1 fan that Fire & Ice thought they could use it against her XD

[foedhrass]

“Leave this tower now and when the Men of Middle-earth fall, I swear to you, every soul in the seen or unseen world will know that it was you who was the architect of their demise!”

I absolutely love Annatar in the Rings of Power season 2. His manipulative gaslighting is just perfect.

During our The_Eldar_Cosplay cosplay vacation I had the chance to wear Annatar and I got a couple of awesome photos out of it. 🤩 

I definitely want to cosplay him again.

Cosplay & edit: Foedhrass

Photo: @goldiepond

[saturdays--sun]

i am once again saying that there is nothing wrong with being a non-sharing selfshipper. there's nothing wrong with blocking people who share one (or multiple) of your f/os. there's nothing wrong with telling doubles not to interact with you. setting boundaries for yourself and your online space is a moral neutral and has nothing to do with being "insecure" or some other negative. if you find that insulting or belittling, that's on you; not on the person setting the boundary. quit trying to make non-sharers into bad guys.

[moxanji-real]

⚠️This f/o imagine is mainly for Nonsharing Selfshippers/Yumes who struggle with seeing dupes of their partners. If you know anyone who struggles with this recommend them this post.⚠️

Picture this: you’re scrolling through the internet, minding your own business, when—bam! Another dupe of your F/O pops up. Your heart races, but not in that dreamy, butterflies-in-your-stomach kind of way. No, this is rage mode activated. Someone else claiming to be with your love, acting like they’ve got what’s rightfully yours. The audacity! You feel that familiar sting in your eyes, the tell-tale sign of tears—are you sad? Angry? A cocktail of both? Before a single tear escapes, your F/O appears out of nowhere, gently wiping it away.

“What’s wrong, Y/N?” they ask, their voice laced with concern.

Wordlessly, you hand them your phone. They scroll through the post with a raised eyebrow before setting the phone down with an exasperated sigh. “Another one dating one of my clones, huh?” they mutter, shaking their head.

They turn to you, their gaze softening as they take your hands in theirs. “Listen, no matter what you see online, no matter what anyone claims, they’ll never be with me. The person they’re dating? That’s just a knockoff, a bargain bin version of the real deal. Probably malfunctioning, too.”

You can’t help but chuckle through your tears as they pull you into their arms. “You’ve got me—the original, the one and only. And you? You’re the one I chose. Always have, always will. Those other people? They’re just confused. They think they’ve won, but they don’t even realize they’re stuck with a cheap imitation.”

You melt into their embrace, their words settling deep in your heart. The noise of the internet fades away, replaced by the warmth of their love. They hold you close, and for the first time in what feels like forever, you feel completely reassured. You’re the one with the real F/O, the one they’ve loved all along. And those other people? Let them live in their little delusions. You’ve got the original, and that’s something no one else can ever take away.

This is my little method for if I see someone have the same f/o as me. Consider their version “fake” and me with the real one. And if they’re a really bad person I’ll consider their fake version extra malfunctioning and broken. Boom. Yes I know it’s kinda rude but it’s how I cope and maybe some of you guys could use this method to help you cope as well. It’s tough being a non sharer especially one who’s insecure. 🫂

Might make a version with less dialogue in case the way f/o spoke here didn’t match your f/o. You guys can let me know!

[selfship-confession-void]

Explaining Nonsharing (FROM MY EXPERIENCE)

Proship/comship/darkfic/neutral DNI!! This post is NOT for you. Stay out of my blog

To note: this is for fun! I've seen a lot of people confused by their own feelings of ickiness/jealousy/discomfort when it comes to nonsharing, so I thought diving into it might help people feel better about how they feel! And also to help explain to those who aren't Nonsharers where the feelings come from. I may make a sequel post to this tying in ficto identities, depending.

Disclaimer: I am not a scientist, professional, or in any way a beacon of all-knowing truth or complete fact. This dissection is largely based off of my own feelings as a Nonsharer to some F/Os myself, and my personal understanding of the matter. I apologize if it doesn't make complete sense, but if it doesn't fit your experience, keep in mind that these things tend to be a complex topic that cannot be narrowed down into one post or theory, because every Nonsharer is different. I'm just attempting to maybe help a few people understand it a bit better.

Ramblings under the cut:

Now: where does nonsharing come from? To be simplistic, it stems from affection. To understand why someone would be unwilling to share their F/Os, you'd have to understand the science behind affection itself, and sometimes jealousy as well. Firstly though, remember that they're both complex emotions. Emotions themself are complicated, but love especially, as it can come in several different forms and for several different reasons. And everyone experiences it differently. There's entire extensive articles and studies you could look into about love and how it works, but let's be honest: it hardly ever makes sense.

How does this tie back? Well, when you're very close to someone, it's natural to want to protect them. It goes into every relationship, even animals experience it. Platonically, familially, romantically, every version of deep affection carries a desire to protect. I won't keep dancing around the explanations, so the easiest way to put it is everyone experiences that protective instinct differently. And sometimes it can be really intense, just as well as it can be minimal. Hence, nonsharing.

Now I know how that sounds, so let me specify: this does not mean Nonsharers see others as a threat or something to guard against. It just means they naturally feel how others do, in a more intense way. That's why it may make you feel uncomfortable to see someone else with your F/O. Because that's your partner, and it's a very natural emotion to want to keep your partner close. But, and this is where jealousy comes in— you gotta be respectful.

Just because it's normal to feel protective of a partner doesn't give anyone the right to harass or antagonize people with the same F/O. Remember— though your love for your F/O is real and extremely valid, you cannot stuff them in a box and let no one else see them ever. They're from free and open media. I know that may sound a little harsh, but you have to be reasonable here. Do not ever harass or bully someone just because they share an F/O you don't wanna share. This is why we have the block button. It's 110% okay to set up a "doubles DNI" rule or block whoever makes you uncomfortable. This is your online experience after all! I'm merely saying no one should shove their ideas onto someone else and judge them accordingly.

This goes for Sharers, too. You're not "better" than someone who doesn't share F/Os. I've seen way too many super aggressive anons and backhanded posts in this community about Nonsharers. Just because you personally don't understand it, or you don't feel upset with someone else selfshipping with a character you like, doesn't mean Nonsharers are any less valid.

There is no excuse for trying to harm a Nonsharer just because they don't share. Any time that's said, the most common response I see is "but sometimes they're toxic!". Guess what? Sharers can be toxic as hell too. Especially when picking on people in their own community over a preference. Just because SOME of them can be rude and damaging doesn't mean you can suddenly act like everyone who doesn't share an F/O is the same bad egg. Yes this goes in vice versa too. But Sharers are particularly prone to picking on Nonsharers more than the other way around in my experience, so yes it is important for me to hammer this point home for so long.

But back on track: you may be wondering— "okay, so you said not wanting to share comes from natural feelings of affection. But why do some people have it more intense than others?". Simple answer is, everyone is different. Yes I know that sounds lame and cheesy, but in several scientific aspects, it's true! There's not always an exact reason why something is different for some than others. It's just how things are. Expecting everyone to conform to one idea is unrealistic. Expecting everyone to experience something the same is unrealistic. As stated before: just because your experience is different, doesn't make anyone else's lesser.

So now that I've established where it may come from and what that means, let's get a little more into how to handle it. Lemme make this abundantly clear— whether you share or not, your relationship with your F/O(s) is valid. Because it is your own unique perception of them, it will always be wholly yours. Your feelings being as strong as they are is proof that it's real. And even if you don't feel them that strongly, considering a character an F/O at all is a testament to genuine care. So what do you do when you care for them so much that seeing other people express care for them is harmful to you?

As I mentioned before— the age old block method is always a good one. If you don't want to see someone's content, you can always use the button that let's you not ever see it again. Don't worry, it doesn't make you "sensitive", "a baby", or anything negative. The function exists for a reason, and if it helps your mental health, absolutely go for it! Your wellbeing is always important above all else.

But if you're like me, you may still feel bad after the block, simply because seeing the content in it of itself was distressing. Unfortunately, there's no single solution to that. I know it's not helpful to read that, but it is true. The best advice I can think to give is find a way to really connect with your F/O. If you can find something that establishes a strong sense of connection, it could be comforting to revisit it whenever you're feeling down. A plush, drawing, song, scent, item, anything like that which you can relate to your beloved. Indulge in it when you're feeling down, and remember: they do love you, your feelings are valid, and as long as you're not hurting yourself or others, there's absolutely nothing wrong with not sharing.

If that doesn't help, try and find what works for you! Remember that your F/O would comfort, love, and support you no matter what. And there is no "this is true for me and no one else" in this community. Everyone is deserving of love. Cope however you need to, but remember that at the end of the day it's never right to take your feelings out on someone else and tear others down over something harmless. In your universe with your F/O, your love is endless and solely yours, but everyone is allowed their own pocket of comfort.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Alright, that's all! I hope this comes across clearly, but a reminder just in case: this is not a professional report, objective fact, or statements that is meant to try and say everyone experiences this. This is a theory from someone who is partially nonsharing attempting to make a connection as to why these things occur, as well as some general good PSAs. If this doesn't match your experience, remember that everyone feels these feelings uniquely, and yours are totally normal and valid. This isn't meant to be a perfect explanation, merely a guess that might help it make some sense to those who don't understand it. As I've stated countless times, no matter what, be kind to each other. Harassment is never okay from either side. Thank you for reading

[deathdetermineslife]

hello I was thinking about this earlier and would love to know the consensus from the community