#'oh do we have any chocolate im craving it'

[rafeandonlyrafe]

tracked

words: 1.5k

warnings: stalker!rafe but hes so cute and sweet about it hehe, fluffy, brief drinking, slut shaming (not by rafe), protective!rafe

rafe whips out his phone the second it beeps, the familiar chime that has kelce and topper rolling their eyes.

“dude, come on. if it's some dumb mobile game, we won't judge you.” topper says, wanting to know what draws rafe to his phone every so often, interrupting whatever it is they're doing to check it, staring intensely and hiding it away from their view.

“yeah man, i once spent $40 on candy crush, no judgement.” kelce says, and even rafe looks up to give him an incredulous look.

“it's nothing.” rafe hums, shoving his phone back into his pocket.

“well, it's your stroke then man.” topper gestures down at the golf ball at rafes feet.

“yeah, yeah.” rafe nods, mind still elsewhere.

--

“funny seeing you here, y/n.” rafe says with a grin, his arm swinging around your shoulder and tugging you into his side.

“oh my god, how do we keep ending up at the same places?” you laugh, stepping away from your friends that all look at you with a mix of jealousy and confusion, unsure why you can't see that rafe is so obviously into you.

“well, i was craving something sweet.” rafe places a hand on his chest as he looks at you. “and i guess i found it.”

“so whatcha gonna order?” you ask, aware that the line is moving fast.

“chocolate cone, and you?” rafe already knows he's going to insist on paying for whatever it is you want from the ice cream shop.

“um…” you tap your finger against your lips, rafes eyes staying on your mouth as you reply. “sprinkles flurry.”

“just sprinkles?” rafe raises his eyebrows.

“yup.” you nod, popping the p.

“damn, i really have found something sweet.”

--

“shit, shit, shit!” you squeal, looking at the deflated tire that you certainly can't drive on.

you groan as you pull your phone out of your pocket, not sure if you should call a tow truck at this hour of night or just a friend to pick you up.

before you can decide, your phone rings, your heart fluttering with relief when you see it's rafe.

“hey.” you answer quickly. 

“hey.” you can hear the smile on rafes face. “just had a feeling i should check on you. everything okay?”

“actually my car just got a flat out on old stoney road. is there any way you can come pick me up?”

you can instantly hear rafe shift and the jingle of keys. “im on my way, stay in your car.”

you do as rafe says, staying on the phone with him until he arrives, allowing him to pull you into a hug.

“ill call a tow in the morning, okay?” rafes hand gently moves up and down your back as he leads you towards his truck.

“mkay.” you say thankfully, climbing into the passenger side. you look at rafe as he rounds the truck and gets into the driver's seat. “how do you always know when i need you?”

“i guess you could say sixth sense.” rafe says with a soft smile.

--

rafe watches the blue dot move on his phone, watching it turn down streets and get closer and closer to his house.

rafe closes the app and shoves his phone in his pocket once he's sure.

he quickly tidies up his room, just in case he manages to get you into his bed.

rafe manages to hurry downstairs and open the door before you even knock, your eyebrows raising in surprise.

“hi rafe!” you say quickly.

“what's up darling?” he questions, leaning casually against the doorframe.

“well-” you clear your throat. “you always check on me, and i figured i should do the same for you.” you shrug.

“oh, how sweet.” rafe steps back so you can walk into tanneyhill, shutting the door behind you and making sure to lock it now that he has precious you inside.

rafes eyes are unashamedly on your ass as you walk further into the house. one day he'll make his move, but he's too into the chase.

--

“so how do you know tina?” you ask, taking a sip of your strawberry margarita. you thought you would hate a blind date, but the man sitting across from you actually isn't too bad so far.

“im friends with her brother.” joshua explains, leaning back in his chair and taking an aggressive gulp of his beer.

“ahh, leroy.” you frown slightly at this. you've never been a fan of tinas family, considering her the only true good one out of the bunch.

you try not to let it affect you for the rest of the date, even though the thought is at the back of your mind during every awkward silence.

“well i had a really good time.” you tell him, heading towards your car, purposely only having one drink along with your food so you could drive yourself home from the restaurant.

“i did too, darling.” the word coming from joshuas mouth makes your nose crinkle up, realizing how you only like it when rafe says it to you.

“ill text you.” you take a step away, but joshua follows.

“don't you wanna keep the good time going?”

“oh, um…” you shake your head no. “it's not that i don't like you, but i don't do that on a first date.”

“really?” joshua hums. “i figured you'd be a slut like tina.”

“excuse-” you can't even finish your sentence before you feel his chest pressing into your back. his scent envelops you and you don't even have to turn around to know who has come to your rescue yet again.

“you can go now.” rafe simply says before placing his hands on your shoulders, guiding you towards his truck.

“shit.” you take a deep breath as you climb into his passenger side. “thank god you're always here to save me.”

“mhm.” rafe starts up his truck, it's not even a discussion on whether or not he's taking you home.

“how do you always know?” you question.

“don't worry about it.” rafe says, reaching over to pat your thigh.

--

“rafe.” you hum out, stepping into the shade and leaving your friends behind to tan on the front of the large boat.

“what's up?” he sits up quickly, having been watching you the entire time, loving your new bikini that shows off even more skin.

“i found this weird app on my phone.” you open up the device and hand it to him. “you're good with this stuff so.” you shrug, explaining why you're coming to him.

last time you had an issue with your screen brightness randomly turning up and down, and rafe fixed it for you.

“hm, just leave it.” rafe says, trying to keep his voice casual despite his nerves skyrocketing.

“are you sure?” you question. “it looks a little suspicious…”

“it's not, babe.” rafe throws your phone down, needing to find something to immediately distract you, knowing how your mind could spiral. 

he whips his shirt off so he's in just his swim trunks. “wanna swim?”

--

location services are no longer transmitting. please redownload application. now showing last location.

“shit!” rafe groans. he honestly can't think of a worse notification to wake up to as he rushes out of bed, getting ready as quickly as he possibly can to jump into his truck.

rafe knocks on tinas door. he swears if her brother or joshua opens it he's going to freak out, his heart already pounding thinking about what you could be doing in there.

“rafe?” you question, surprised when he quickly tugs you into a tight hug.

“god, im glad you're alright.” rafe sighs deeply, eyes flickering up to see tina watching the two of you in the doorway.

“what happened?” you question, pulling away to look at rafe, placing your hand on his cheek to bring his eyes back down to you.

“i-” rafe begins to explain himself when tina interrupts.

“i told you that app was sending your location. now we know who was on the other end.”

you take a step back from rafe, your mind slowly putting the pieces together.

“baby, i can explain-” rafe looks like he's ready to drop to his knees and beg, but you instantly know that's not necessary.

“you could have just asked.” you say with a small chuckle as rafe looks at you in confusion.

“you could have just asked.” you say again. “for my location. i would have given it to you without you having to be all sneaky.”

“im so sorry, i never should have done it without your permission.” rafe says as tina quietly slips away, realizing this isn't something she needs to be watching.

“i forgive you for all the times you saved me.” 

“so um… we're good?” rafe asks.

“not quite.” rafe is ready to apologize a million times over when you place your hands on his shoulders and push up to your tiptoes to press a kiss to his lips.

it takes rafe a second to realize what is happening, and then his arms are around you, depending the kiss as he holds you tight to your body.

“now we're good.” you giggle as you pull away. 

sfw taglist: @winterrrnight @bejeweledreverie @ladyinbl00d @ethanthequeefqueen @drewsephrry

[veri-xo]

chocolate comforts - james beaufort x reader

wc: 570

summary: you’re on your period and desperately craving chocolate. let’s just say james doesn’t do anything halfway…

pairings: james beaufort x fem!reader on her period

warnings: talk of blood, periods, just that kind of stuff in general, light swearing

tag list: @mp-littlebit @his-littlefox @pockyyasii @kaffeeine @f4iry-bell

@jamcarven @clarissaweasley-10 @benny1989fredd @123letsgobestie @tornqdowarnings

@elysianwayy77 @blairwaldrfsworld (lmk if u don’t wanna be tagged!)

You woke up in a pool of your own blood. 

What a great way to start the day.

Sighing, you get up and head to the bathroom. You strip, throwing your clothes in the laundry and step under the hot spray. The water is soothing.

Wrapped in a towel, you take a two ibuprofen pills and lots of water. You change into your go to period outfit. An oversized hoodie that belonged to your boyfriend, James, and some sweatpants.

Speaking of James, you were supposed to go to a gala together today. Of fucking course with your luck it ended up on the day that literally all you want to do is sleep and eat and be angry at everything.

Now annoyed, you quickly change the sheets before collapsing onto the sofa, phone in hand. All you need is a snack now…

Chocolate.

God it sounded like the most amazing thing in the world. You get up, headed to the kitchen. You scour the pantry. The fridge. Everywhere.

You don’t have any chocolate.

You curse under your breath, mad at yourself and anyone unfortunate enough to cross your mind.

A ringtone plays from your phone. A familiar one. You know who it is before checking. James.

You pick up. “Hey,” you say, trying to sound not-about-to-kill-everyone-on-the-earth.

“Hey dove.” His voice is soft. “And before you say it, we’re not going to the gala. I already know today isn’t going to be good for you.”

You stare at your phone, suddenly emotional. James was the most thoughtful boyfriend ever. “Thank you,” you say quietly. “Sorry.”

You can practically feel the exasperated-ness James is giving off from the other end. “Don’t ever apologize, dove. It’s not something you can control.” His tone is genuine and it makes tears prick at your eyes.

“Is there anything you need?” James asks, breaking you out of your thoughts.

Without missing a beat, you say, “Chocolate.” He laughs.

“Of course, dove. I’ll be over in a bit.”

You hang up the phone and curl up into a ball on the couch, burying yourself under a blanket as you watch an episode of the show you’re watching.

30 minutes later, the doorbell rings. You get up, walking over and opening the door.

You gasp. James stands their, holding five boxes of specialty chocolate. Dangling off his arm is a bag from your favorite bakery. You were already drooling from the smell of your favorite Nutella-filled donuts.

On his other arm you could see a grocery store bag and the lid of an ice cream container peaking out. Several ice cream containers.

“Oh my god James,” you breathe, eyes wide. “What’s all this?”

James give you a grin. “For you, dove. Your chocolate.”

You laugh, letting him in. You take some of the boxes and set them onto the counter. “I would’ve been fine with just a Hershey’s bar or something.”

James sets down the rest of the stuff. “I know. But you deserve far more than just some Hershey’s.”

You smile, leaning in to kiss him softly. After you pull away he holds you in his arms, stroking your hair. “I wish I could take all your pain away,” he mumbles into your hair.

Your heart might just explode. “You already do by just being here.”

He kisses the top of your head, brushing the hair out of your face. “Now why don’t we sample all these?”

a/n: this entire thing was self indulgent because im on my period and I want to die and I want chocolate 🤭

[murdrdocs]

OMG!!!! I LOVE YOUR WRITING AND YOUR WHOLEEEE PAGE LIKE FR I JUSY READ HALF OF ALL YOUR WORK

COUKD I REQUEST A ETHAN LANDRY X READER WHOS ON HER PERIOD FILAJDKAIS

cause i am in horrible pain 🙏

TYSM IM SO GLAD THAT PPL R ENJOYING MY WORK !! i hope u feel better btw luvie :(((( <3333 and i hope this helps in any possible way FLUFF + GN!

ethan tries his best when you're on your period. he's inexperienced, but not stupid. he has a sister so he knows how debilitating a period can be for someone. which is why he's kicked into action as soon as you send him a text.

' on my period rn so we can only hang if ur willing to lay in bed and binge watch cartoons with me '

he's at your apartment a little later than you expected him to be. you're limping to the door, craving the left behind warmth of your heating pad, and pulling the door open to see exactly why ethan was running a little late.

he holds the classic 'thank you ☺' bags in his hands, and you can slightly see through the transparent plastic to notice that he has the goods. it's not until he walks in and sets the items down on the dining room table that you see just how prepared he is.

midol, tylenol, 3 different chocolate brands, salty snacks, pads of different sizes, tampons.

you're staring at the bag, then at ethan, a small smile on your face. "i appreciate it, e, but these are things i already have."

his face blanches, and then it reddens. "oh ... yeah. i knew that." he awkwardly scratches the back of his neck. "i ... um ... didn't ask for a receipt so i don't think i can return this."

the giggle you let out isn't condescending, even though it's one of amusement. the sound is soft, and followed by a wince as a cramp stings low in your belly. you double over, holding onto the wooden furniture and holding a hand near your womb, silently wishing that this ball sized, uncomfortable knot would just fucking go away.

"are you okay?" he sounds more worried than he should, but you don't mind. you nod, "yeah," and turn away from the dining room to head back to your bedroom. "just feeling like complete shit."

you can hear ethan follow behind you, his shoes thudding against the floor. "right," he pauses and you hear shuffling. when he starts to walk again, the sound of his feet is softer, likely from just socks on hardwood. "is there anything i can do?"

you're turning into your room and he's right behind you. thankfully, you fall against the bed and instantly pull your heating pad onto your stomach. "just cuddle with me and keep the trash can in sight in case i hurl."

ethan nods sternly, instantly following your orders by pulling your small trash can to rest beside your bed and slipping his jacket off before he climbs in beside you.

your figure gravitates to his side and you instantly snuggle in, a pleased sigh leaving your mouth and your eyelids quickly getting heavier.

"were you watching 'bluey' before i got here?" you almost forgot about your computer which sits open to the australian kid show.

"mhm."

ethan doesn't even have time to tease you about it because you're falling asleep, and he's hitting play to watch it for himself.

[thegnomelord]

plap plap plap plap get pregnant get pregnant get pregnant. me getting these damn military boys pregnant

im still on da cruise UGHHH

johnny really likes chocolate. its bad. he constantly craves it—you cant even hide it from him, sniffs it out like a fucking dog. soo…those aphrodisiac chocolates in the fridge? oh, he doesn’t read the packaging. god forbid he has any inhibitions after that.

uhh graves has like seven cats. he loves cats. theyre easy to care for, plus he can leave them alone for a week or so while he’s working. so…when he visits a particular petshop during his mission—underground shit going on here, some fucked up experiments on demihumans or other. he finds a scared little catboy just about to be messed with before his team bursts in. well…there’s no rules against taking this one home right?

UGH VOMITS EVERYWHERE I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS ABOUT VALERIA BUT IDK IF YOU WRITE FOR HER SO….probably not sigh

anyways i think gaz with the fattest tcock is like canon ngl hes so proud of it. no shame at all. and gaz is NASTY like that you know he doesnt care if they look at him weird in the lockers (i wish sigh)

-the flower you know who i am i cant find the silly symbol ugh

-❀

What do people even do on a cruise? Like I get traveling to different countries by boat but there's a big stretch of time where you're just on the sea with fuck all to look at.

Also damn dude r you reading mine and Embry's thoughts? Cause legit yesterday we were simpin over preggo Simon lol. Imagine his belly would be soooooo fucking huge and he'd grumble all the time lol.

Also yeah, I'm gay as fuck and only like men, you can go to embry so you two bi disasters can simp over valeria.

Also I'm kinda laughing at the idea of Graves 'adopting' the demihuman reader who's being trafficked or some shit, and just assumes you're the common house cat variety cause you're small from being starved n shit. Only to figure out you're actually a mountain lion or a black jaguar demihuman when you grow fucking massive after a few months under his care. 👀

Also you are so right, Gaz has a massive tcock and he's so smug about it.

[ihavemanyhusbands]

I'm thinking of so many ideas for Richie rn and I need somewhere to put them lol But first, hi!! I hope you're having a great week! I have you to thank personally for making me love Richie lmao

a major one in my head right now is what he would do if reader had the munchies. I don't know how you feel about weed so feel free to skip this! But the idea of reader being high and needy while BEGGING Richie to get them McDonald's or something has me down badddd lol

(if you don't feel comfortable writing this I definitely have other ideas to send in ♡)

THANK U IM LITERALLY SO FLATTERED <3 🥲😭im literally in the munchies trenches rn so trustttt me I understand this all too well lmaoooo!!

---

For the better part of an hour after you and Richie had smoked up in the roof, neither of you spoke, too immersed in the movie you were watching. Your head lay on his lap as he absently played with your hair.

Your stomach rumbled as you watched somebody cooking on screen, but it wasn’t any sort of fancy food that you started craving.

"Oh my god, you know what sounds so good right now..." You said, rolling onto your back to look up at him. “Some cheesy roll ups from Taco Bell.”

You groaned a little as if to emphasize your point, and he chuckled.

“We’ve got the ingredients here, I could make some for you,” he said, lovingly tracing a finger down the side of your face.

“Listen, I love when you cook for me but right now… it just wouldn’t be the same,” you countered with a pout. “Fuuuck, I just thought of some BK chicken fries, too. And some nuggets. AND a vanilla frosty. What if we just had a mukbang?”

“A what?”

“A mukbang. You know, just like… getting a bunch of different things and then just going to town.”

“Oh I don’t know…”

His amused grin broadened as you shifted to press yourself closer to his chest, wrapping an arm around his midsection.

“Come on babe, pleaseeeeeee,” you pleaded, giving him puppy dog eyes. "Do you want me to starve to death? Is that it?"

"No, of course not!" He said, bending down to kiss your forehead. "I would never, ever let such a thing happen. What else do you want me to get you?"

"Actually, I'd love some water. I've got hella cottonmouth right now."

"So do I. I’ve just been too lazy to get up.”

The two of you laughed, and you stretched up to kiss him, affection swelling in your chest. You were truly two peas in one pod.

"Just use my phone and get anything you want," he said, getting up to go to the kitchen. "Oh and get me a chocolate frosty and some fries. Can’t believe you got me into that monstrosity of a mix.”

“How dare you! Fries dipped in ice cream is a true delicacy!” You yelled as you scrolled through doordash on his cellphone. “Carmen’s been putting too many ideas in your head!”

“Yeah maybe you’re right. What does that jagoff know about good food, anyway?”

[izupie]

I got tagged in this like a bazillion years ago but I only just now remembered about it aaaa - thank you for tagging me @microsuedemouse I do love answering these sorts of things <3

------------

1. three ships: ok here we go

Destiel (Dean/Castiel) - don't boo me I'm right - it's the angel/hunter frenemies to friends to lovers pipeline. theyre cute theyre messy theyre besties theyre fighting theyre risking it all to save each other again. *chefs kiss*

Albether (Albedo/Aether) - boyfriends with secrets and emotional scars find comfort in each other. the quiet one with the bubbly one dynamic. plus they just look cute together im sorry

Izuocha (Izuku/Ochako) - pure fluff. supportive and adorable. theyre uncomplicated to me and make me smile

---

2. first ship ever: oooooh !! let me cast my mind back.... back...... oh no why is this so far back........ okay!

The first time I can remember wanting two characters to be together is probably when I was a teeny tiny Izupie watching Sailor Moon while I was in primary school, maybe year 3/4 I think? (UK school system - I have no idea what the equivalent would be in the US) (I could google it) (but I don't wanna)

I was obsessed with Sailor Moon every morning on tv. I watched the dub though - back when I had no idea these things were even dubbed over at all. I loooooved Serena and Darien - I'm sorry I know their dub names can give people hives, but I have so many fond memories of them I'll love them even if nobody else does asdfghjk

the whole he's really secretly tuxedo mask thing broke my tiny little mind and I was like gaaasssppp ! and I wanted them to be together even more - their initial I like you/you annoy me dynamic probably informed a lot of my ship preferences going forward

Every time there was an episode focusing on their relationship I would get so invested. they were my first real 'ship' for sure

3. currently listening: I'm not really listening to any particular music rn - I listen to the radio a lot though! Just a popular music station that plays all the latest hits

---

4. Last movie: I can't believe this is legit going to be Tinkerbell and the Secret of the Wings lmaoooo - it's a comfort film and I needed some cheering up after a long hard day at work last week, so I booted up disney plus and on it went. Literally the lowest stakes you can imagine, just lots of pretty visuals, sparkly wings, fairies, upbeat pop songs and a happy ending. ultimate comfort film.

---

5. currently reading: soooooo much fanfiction. so. much. fanfiction. a shameful amount of fanfiction. but it's sooooooo good.

Destiel has the most fics on AO3 guys. there is so much to choose from. it's glorious. if you can think of ANY trope you enjoy there will be pages of fics for it. I am so spoilt for choice and I'm having so much fun with it

---

6. currently watching: *looks at the screen like I'm in The Office*

SUPERNATU*gunshot noises*

---

7. currently consuming: nothing right now but I'm hungry and I'm going to make some dinner soon. I've been snacking on a lot of the chocolate I got for christmas recently ahaaaa

---

8. currently craving: a hug. which is bizarre because I would describe myself as not-a-huggy-person but I had a dream that I hugged someone the other night and I woke up like. I WANT A HUG. but like. not just a hug. I want a HUG. rib crushingly tight with an even tighter squeeze thrown in there. chins over shoulders. noses in necks. closed eyes. breathe deep. step apart but still holding on. That's a HUG. that's what I want.

Universe - get on that please.

---

here's the Tagging part, but I'm not sure I want to tag anyone at the moment - so this is a ~free tag~ to anyone reading this that just wants to answer some fun questions! yes, you there!

[bbboar]

weird asks: ALL hehehe

chaotic good, i love it!!

who is/are your comfort character(s)? Dont rly have comfort characters but during the 2020 lockdowns Breq Imperial Radch was my comfort character bcs i was going through some shit and she was a force of nature and justice Basically i get why Seivarden was down bad.

lighter or matches? Dont smoke

do you leave the window open at night? Absolutely not. It does not close properly and theres spiderwebs outside!

which cryptid being do you believe in? None of them but love to hear stories

what color are your eyes? Brown

why did you do that? What?

hair-ties or scrunchies? Ive never used a scrunchy so i cannot judge effectively

how many water bottles are in your room right now? Only one (i have 2 metal water bottles, one for home and another for work)

which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee? Depends on the season! Hot for winter but cold for summer.

would you slaughter the rich? i understand the craving for violence but personally i think it would be more torturous to have them watch as their wealth is redistributed and they have to live like normal people and work and have a budget and shit lol Like i know i doesnt sound bad but the way some of these people live....theyd be crying screaming shitting throwing up etc

favorite extracurricular activity? Girl im 27, i dont go to school anymore. All my activities are extracurricular

what kind of day is it? Thursday. Actually its after midnight so its Friday now

when was the last time you ate? Like 5 hours ago, i had some chocolate

do you love the smell of earth after it rains? Yeah!!!

are you a parent? (all answers qualify) no

can you drive? No but god do i need to learn to make my life easier

are you farsighted or nearsighted? Neither to my knowledge

what hair products do you use? Lmao none?? Unless im curling my hair and using hair spray. Oh i also use a hair mask each time i shower.

imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails? omg of course, bestie!

do you say soda or pop? Im Australian, i say fizzy drink

something you’ve kept since childhood? I have a sonic tshirt that ive had since i was 12 years old and i will not throw it away until it comes apart

what type of person are you? Vampire coded werewolf

how do you feel about chilly weather? I get sad when the weather starts getting colder bcs summertime is my favourite, but after that transition period, i think its fun to go into cozy mode! I love my big comforting jackets and my oodie and having tea every day.

if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing? Looking at the starts, laughing, having deep conversations.

perfume/body spray or lotion? Personally i dont use perfume or body spray. The only lotion i use is moisturizer bcs my skin is dry

a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times? So many of them, lets not get into it

about how many hours of sleep did you get? Yesterday? Probably ~7

do you wear a mask? Yeah although not as much as i used to ngl

how do you like your shower water? Warm.

is there dishes in your room? Nope. The most there is at any given time is 1 tea mug and maaaybe a plate if ive had a snack or smtn

what type of music keeps you grounded? This doesnt apply to me

do you have a favorite towel? Not really?

the last adventure you’ve been on? Took public transport to an area id never been before last week. To me thats an adventure lol

is there a song you know every word to by heart? Yeah, theres a bunch where as soon as they start, ill know all the lyrics and be able to sing along but if the song isnt playing? Head empty.

what’s your timezone? Australian Eastern Standard Time

how many times have you changed your url? Over 5 for sure

someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years? Damn i think ive known Kieran Teeniepaws for 10+ years (Kieran if youre reading this sorry for not tagging you, this post is sooo long)

a soap bar that smells good? I dont use bars of soap??? I dont find them that practical. But ive sniffed a lot of them in shops and like 80% of them smell rly good

do you use lip balm? I have to bcs my acne medication gives me super dry lips

did you have any snacks today? Yeah i had some chocolate after dinner

how do you take your coffee? I just have a regular latte no sugar unless its more bitter than im used to. Then 1 sugar

an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site? Twitter lol, podbean, spotify, youtube and as of recently pokemon go

what’s your take on spicy foods? i love spicy food! i actually bought some sriracha the other day bc i missed having it

you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it? who are you? The fbi? Im not going to tell you

can you remember what happened yesterday? woke up, took the bus, went to work, kept thinking about touchstarved (game) while at work, tried to play some sneaky pokemon go during work bcs i ran out of pokeballs and needed to spin the local pokestop to get more, went home, made dinner, made a touchstarved thread on twitter, went to sleep

favorite holiday film? Not to be a grinch but i dont like holiday films and im sooo sick of the xmas films that come out every year.

what was the last message you sent?

when did you first try an alcohol beverage? Pretty sure i was 14,i had a glass of wine and fell asleep almost right after lol

can you skip rocks? I think its fun to do but i am bad at it

can i tag you in random stuff? If youre a stranger? No. If youre a mutual, sure! Go ahead.

[chelleztjs18]

Hello you 😌

I am okay, did some chores and hung some of the art stuff on the wall. How are you and what you do today?

Yes hahaha I'd rather listen to the other person anyways. I would act like I am still wide awake but then fail. 😅

I am stubborn. I never listen to people when they tell me to go to the doctor if I'm not feeling well.

No, I didn't go out today. I'll probably get the stuff for baking next week. Are you a dessert person or do you like savory stuff more?

Hahaha I do that Thor impression a lot. A few years ago, we were out at a restaurant and we decided to do some drinking and just have fun. So we had some shots, and it was so good, I think it was called something like gummi bears. But anyway, we took it and I almost threw the shot glass on the floor while yelling ANOTHER! 😅

Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn't peeling well 🤣🤣🤣

Do you buy girl scout cookies a lot? I like the samoas.

Yes haha I can go to the movies for free if I was invisible! But I would do that too, listen in on people. Then freak them out later by spilling the stuff they were talking about in secret haha.

I'd give up coffee. I love my snacks. Do you have any favorite snacks?

Would you rather be in the hanging out with the wizards and witches from Harry Potter or the vampires from Twilight?

- CuriousGeorge

Hello! I'm back! :D

I'm okay, just tired and a little moody / down, probably just because it's almost that time of the month. I dont know. but oh well..

Had a busy day today, took em to the park for quite a bit. We played catch while em ran around. I love playing catch although one time the baseball slipped out of my baseball gloves n hit my nose n it bled. lol. then after we got back from the park, i made dinner and clean the kitchen n dishes. Did some laundry. so not much different, same shit different day. lol.

oh thats nice, I actually love have pictures or arts on the wall of my house.

haha i dont remember if i ever talk all night n fell asleep. I always tell the person I talk to that im sleepy n need to hang up.

ough, you are that kind of stubborn person, huh? well, me too. lol. but sometimes i will get iritated when someone being like that, it's because i care n i got worried.

oh let me know if tomorrow you really gonna end up baking something. i wanna know. hahahaha. I like both, savory and sweet. depends on my mood. but mostly when I crave something when it's almost to my period time, I crave meat or something savory. I think when I'm drunk I also crave savory. but i love my desert too though. :D what about you?

oooh i know that shots. I love it! hahaha were you really drunk that u almost throw that shot glass? thats so funny.

hahaha not peeling well. that's so funny. i love corny or cheesy jokes. oh I got one! What do u call an angry carrot? a steamed veggie! lol

not really, but sometimes i buy those cookies. the chocolate mint girl scout cookies are so good n dangerous. it should be illegal. lol because once u eat it, u cant stop. samoa is the purple one? I never try it before. isnt it the one with peanut butter and oatmeal or something?

hahah thats a good plan if u hv invisibility. I didnt even think about it. lol.

I like snacks but i think i dont snacks often. I like pringles and original ruffles. or something chocolatey. I think i prefer to drink something cold n sweet for my "snack". Thats all i can think of the snacks i like. whats urs?

oh for chocolate chips cookie, do u like the soft one or the crispy one? for brownies, do u like the edge one or the middle one?

hmmm i would pick both if i can. lol. I like vampires but i think learning magic sounds more fun. what about u?

next question?

Cheerio!

[diah-the-demon]

i take it back my mother didnt even take a few days to start her bullshit

her new record now sits at like 3 hours back home after a trip to get into her bullshit

[olisephaa]

Today is just one of those days where you eat chocolate for breakfast, walk for 2 1/2 hours playing mobile games, eat chocolate and bread for lunch, walk another 2 1/2 hours, and eat the remaining chocolate bar for dinner. Just one of those days

[gins-potter]

I'm not sure if you're still open with requests on the winx fic on look of love,,, but if you are can you do another flora and riven pair.

I noticed there's actually very little fanfic content on them and your wearing their clothes trope on em was super cuteeee

For specific trope on flora riven request im kind of picturing gift giving. Like the love language. Tbh any love language that you see em will do hehe. Thank you for hearing me out 😇😇

This is a ship I literally never think about until someone brings it up to me but it's surprisingly fun to write. Anyway I finished this ages ago but just kept forgetting to post.

...

The gardening gloves appeared out of nowhere one day, lying innocently on her bedside table, no wrapping, no bow or other ornamentation to decorate the gift.  Flora’s mouth fell open into a soft little ‘o’ as she touched the coarse material and glanced around the room.

“Did you put these here?” she asked Bloom, although something told her that her friend hadn’t.

Indeed, the redhead glanced up with a slight frown before shaking her head.  “Nope.  You didn’t buy them?”

“No.”

They weren’t the most expensive gardening gloves she’d ever seen, but the simple thought of someone buying them for her after she’d complained the other day about her Snapdragon taking a chunk out of her finger, warmed her heart.  She just didn’t know who her secret gift giver could be.

The little gifts continued to appear.  Nothing too elaborate or expensive; chocolate when she said she was craving something sweet, a necklace she mentioned having her eye on, a bouquet of cheap but infrequently flowering blooms.  All things that showed that someone was out there paying attention.

“So, who’s your secret admirer?” Stella asked her one day, draping herself across Flora’s bed and watching as the other girl tucked a gifted flower into her hair.

“I don’t know,” Flora replied honestly, even as she smiled a bit.  Curiosity tugged at her of course, but she was enjoying the sweet mystery of it all as well.

“Well, who knew you wanted the necklace?”

Flora sighed a little, not as interested in puzzling it out as Stella, but played along regardless.  “Umm, I think I mentioned it at lunch the other day, when we were with Bloom, Sky, Helia, and Riven.”

“And the chocolate,” Stella prompted.  “It’s a very specific brand.”

“Oh, I don’t know,” Flora said, even as her mind turned over the day she’d mentioned her sweet craving.  Something tugged at her memory even as she said, “I’m happy not knowing, my so-called secret admirer will reveal themselves when they’re ready.”

“Well, they better be ready soon,” Stella harrumphed as she pushed herself off the bed and wandered out of the room.  “I want to know already.”

Flora waited until she’d left the room before gathering her things and heading out herself.

…

Nervousness gnawed at Flora’s stomach as she knocked on the ajar door and stepped into the room.

“When were you going to tell me?”

Riven didn’t turn completely from where he was sitting at his desk, but he did glance half over his shoulder at her, eyes guarded.

“I’m not sure what you mean,” he said carefully.

A blush rose in Flora’s cheeks, but she held her ground.  She’s turned over all the gifts in her mind, who had been around when she’d mentioned wanting them, who would leave them without wanting any credit, and only one name remained at the end.

“When were you going to tell me that you’re the one leaving me gifts?”

She would be mortified if she was wrong about this, but Flora knew instantly that she wasn’t by the way he clenched his jaw and looked away.

“I didn’t want it to be a big thing, I just wanted to…”

Something in Flora wanted to push, wanted to find out what he was going to say, but one didn’t push Riven, Flora knew.  Not unless she wanted him to shut down completely.  So instead she just walked forward, slowly, to give him time to pull away, as she reached his side, placed a hand on his shoulder and leaned in to brush a soft, sweet, short kiss to his cheek.

“Thank you,” she breathed, and when she pulled back she thought she saw something like happiness dancing in his dark eyes.

[sirisuorionblack]

hi! i saw your requests are open, can i please get a harry potter x reader? it's around 6th year and they've decided to spend christmas at hogwarts, so in the christmas morning they wake up to have some hot chocolate and open their presents together in front of the fireplace and its all cute and fluff because im craving some soft harry

The king and the queen

Harry Potter x reader

Summary - The chill Christmas morning spent by the fireplace with hot chocolates, presents and confessions was all that Harry could ever ask for.

Warnings - Nothing.

A/N Ahhh! Got carried away a bit (perhaps not entirely what you had in mind) and sorry for getting this out late! And you might wanna know a bit about rice art which is basically drawing on a grain of rice. Hope you like it!! 💖💖

A beam of sunlight shone through the partition of the curtains, filling the chill Gryffindor boys’ dormitory with warmth. Harry, who laid awake, was quick to cover your eyes with his hand. It was finally Christmas and he did not want you to wake up feeling grumpy.

Harry had never spent a proper Christmas for 11 years of his life and the next 5 was a gift he held close to his heart. Each year Harry was more than excited to wake up on December 25th with a wide grin on his face. He craved to open the gifts, enjoy the magnificent feast and above all pour his heart in deciding what gifts to buy. That was what made it all more special - getting gifts and spending time with his friends.

But the best part was Christmas eve when Harry spent the entire night staying awake, playing games and chatting loudly with his best friends yet this year was a bit different. It was just you and him, wrapped in each other’s arms with soft whispers and silent confession that he wouldn’t trade for the world.

A smile found its way to Harry’s face as he wrapped his arms even tighter around you and dropped a gentle kiss to your forehead, making sure it wouldn’t wake you up. He could simply stare at a wall with you in his arms for the rest of the eternity if that’s what was asked of him, but the wizarding world was too cruel to his simple desires.

“Good morning, love,” You nudged his jaw with your nose and held onto his waist, tightly. Harry was glad to hear your hoarse voice once again in the morning and he wished to hear it for the rest of his life.

“Good morning,” he said with a wide grin plastered on his face as you further buried your neck into his shoulder, “Is it cold?”

You hummed, “My feet are frozen,”

“They are under the blankets,”

You paused, “That does not make it any better,”

Harry chuckled, “Will a hot chocolate make it any better?”

Finally, he saw you pull away from his neck, your face adorning the most beautiful smile Harry has seen in his life, “You’re my hero.”

“Not that I’m complaining about the absolute heaven,” You said, taking a sip from your cup of hot chocolate as you sat down before the fireplace, “Where did you get this?”

Harry smirked and kissed your cheek, “That is for me to know and you to find out,”

You narrowed your eyes and shook your head, “Potter-”

“Shh,” Harry placed his finger against your lips, “Not now. We have things to do and gifts to open.”

“That’s one more jumper to add to your vast collection,” you laughed as Harry scrambled to open the first gift from Mr and Mrs Weasley.

“Oh, let me remind you that half of my “vast collection“ is now missing. Thanks to you, darling,” Harry said, shaking his head and looking at presents littered around him.

“Your turn,” You caught the perfectly wrapped blue present Harry had thrown your side and for the first time you kept your cup down beside you.

Harry watched as your fingers peeled the wrapping with elegance unlike how he did. You looked absolutely beautiful in his maroon jumper and if he could watch you smile for the rest of his life that would be a boon he would give his life for.

“It’s from Hermione,” Your eyes trained on the History of Hogwarts book, “Is this supposed to be some sort of a sarcastic telling?”

You had spent another hour opening gifts and siping your drinks until you turned to glance at Harry as his arms wrapped around your waist, “It’s time for my gift, isn’t it?” He said, smiling, softly.

“Harry,” You breathed holding tightly onto his hand. Knowing him, you didn’t know what to think of the present he had gotten, you didn’t know if they were objects with deep meanings or words with utmost love but what you did know was how much he had struggled for it.

Harry kissed your forehead and pulled away from your warm embrace to sit before you, your knees bumping each other. He took a deep breath, “There is a war out there, and I don’t know if either of us will survive or not - that’s the truth my love - but I want you to know that no matter what,” He held your hands tightly in his, “No matter what I’ll always be there for you, I'll never leave you alone in this scary world and that’s a promise.”

“Love,” You breathed, and gently rested your hands on either side of his face, “We will make it out of this - safe and alive. Nothing is gonna hurt or separate us.”

Harry held your hand and leaned his forehead against yours, “I love you, my queen,”

He was blessed with your beautiful laughter and the silent whisper, “I love you too, king,” you pulled away with a cheeky grin, "Now where is my gift?"

Harry chuckled. This was one of the many things that made him fall in love with you - you had the talent to make him laugh and smile even in the worst of times.

"Well, I've gotten my queen what she's always wanted," He smiled, gently as he reached behind him to retrieve a tiny box, neatly covered in maroon wrapping.

"Open it," He thrust the box into your hands and took his seat beside you again, wrapping the two of you in his blanket.

As your elegant fingers fumbled with the wrapping, Harry’s heart raced anxiously.  Your eyes widened when you opened the tiny box to reveal a pendant but upon squinting your eyes you could see the middle of it as a grain of rice, richly painted figure of a…King. Not any king but yours. The messy hair and the round glasses were just enough to show you who it was. 

“You did it?” You asked Harry, your eyes blown wide. 

“Darling, you know I am not an artist, and drawing on a tiny grain-” Harry sighed, “you know that’s impossible for me,”

You chuckled, “I know. And this is so beautiful!”

“But that was not what you wanted,” He said, smirking at you, “I know that. Which is why I got another one.”

Harry pulled out an identical box that held a similar art but this one of a Queen. His Queen.

[thelittleboyfromloveactually]

Soft sheets

dylan o’brien x reader

word count: 1064

prompt: dylan takes care of you during shark week

warnings: i don’t think there are any in this one just a cute blurb full of fluff

IM BACK B*TCHES!!!! two shorten the road, part two is coming probably no later than sunday, idk why it’s taking me so long man it’s so weird. buttttt enjoy another cute blurb!

no gifs are mine unless i say it specifically, credits to creators!

It was that type of month again. Shark week. Moon sickness. In the red tent. Kitty has a nose bleed, crimson wave, code red time of month. Or in other words, the most painful week of the month. You lay in bed, motionless. You had barely slept due to the searing pain in your lower belly. You were on the edge of your bed because the freaking cord for the heating pad that rested on your stomach was long enough. You groaned and rolled over to your side and curled up into a ball. The sun seemed to shine annoyingly bright through your window. If only someone would come and shut the shade for you. Your eyes began to close and your heart rate slowed, as you drifted off into sleep. But your so-called sleep was interrupted by a buzzing on your night stand next to your head. You sighed and threw your hand onto the night stand, picking up your phone. It was Dylan. Sweet, funny, amazing Dylan. Dylan and you had been friends for what seemed like forever. Yet you had only started dating about 6 months ago, but it seemed like forever due to your friendship. The press that seemed to be glued to Dylan even though the two of you were dating for a year before you actually did. You smiled and accepted the call.

“Hey dyl” you said in a happy but drowsy voice.

“Hey Ace!” That was his nickname for you. It started two weeks after you met Dylan in 6th grade. You were never quite sure why he decided to call you this but eventually it just seemed to fit. And it must have because he is still calling you this over a decade later. “I am on my way over, I want to take you out to breakfast” you could hear how happy he was

“That’s so sweet Dyl, and I would love to and really really wish I could!” You started as you sat up in your bed

“But….” He continued for you

“But I’m surfing the crimson wave and can barely move” you finished

“Awwww Y/N! That sucks” he said

“I’m so sorry!” You tried to apologize

“Don’t be! It’s totally fine Ace, I’m still gonna come over though. Is that ok?” He asked

“Yes of course it is” you smiled

“Perfect! I will be there in 20 mins!” He said

“But you live like 5 mins away….” You said confused

“Yes but I gotta make a stop first, ok? Ok love you!”he said hanging up

“Oh but dyl-“ you didn’t get time to finish

You plopped back down in your bed and sighed. You rolled over and let your eyes and body rest.

In what seemed like one second after you had apparently dozed off you were awoken by someone opening your bedroom door. You jumped up, scared by the sudden noise.

“Hey, hey, its just me” Dylan said as he walked into your bedroom. He plopped down the bags that he had been holding. You sighed in relief “I didn’t mean to scare you, how are you doing?” He asked coming to stand next to your side of the bed. He strolled you hair and looked into your eyes

You smiled “I’m good, I had a heart attack for a second there but ya I guess I’m ok” you said jokingly

He laughed “I’m sorry! I didn’t know you would be asleep”

“It’s fine” you smiled up at him “how did you get in?” You asked yawning “and what’s up with all the contraband?” You asked gesturing to the bags on the floor

“Oooo well m’lady” he tilted his head and raised his eyebrows then smiled and began to walk over to the bags “I’ve got some stuff for you” he plopped them down one the foot of your bed and began unpacking

“So, we got tampons and pads, I wasn’t sure which ones to get but a nice lady at the store helped me in return for a picture.” You giggled, and he continued to unpack “dark chocolate, pickles and chips, the lady also said these are common things people crave”

“I’m not pregnant dyl” you smiled sweetly at him, this man was just too good for this world

“Well i know but I just, whatever, do you want some? Oh and I also got ice cream” he said handing the stuff to you

“Um yes!” You exclaimed “ugh god I love you Dylan”

“Maybe I should buy you ice cream more often” he leaned in to kiss you, then began climbing to your bed. Once he was fully under the covers he gasped

“What?! What’s wrong?!” You asked concerned

“Oh my god” he said and began cuddling up in the sheets more

“What is it?!” You pushed

“Did you get new sheets?” He asked. He looked at you with those adorable eyes that let you know that he was actually ok.

“Yes….why?” You questioned

“Um because I swear to god I’ve never felt sheets this amazing” he said, you giggled

“Thank you, I specifically got them for that reason. I’m glad you like them though” you said cuddling up with him

“Oh yes, I have a feeling I’m going to be here a lot more often” he winked. You laughed again and he kissed your forehead “wanna watch something?” He asked sweetly

“Ya sure” he grabbed the remote and handed it to you

“What are we gonna watch princess?” He asked

Then you got and idea “better hang tight mister man because we are doing a Disney princess marathon” you said nodding your head

“Oh my god, really?!” He exclaimed

“Oh come on it’s not that bad” you said as you navigated to Disney+

“Oh i know! It’s amazing! This is going to be the best omgoodness” he said excitedly

You laughed and he smiled. He loved your laugh, it just brought him pure happiness.

He hummed “I love you so much, you know that right?” He said looking at you in adoration

“Of course, and I love you so much too” you smiled. He leaned down and kissed you “thank you for all this stuff dyl”

“Of course my love. Now, let’s get to this princess marathon shall we?” He asked and you nodded quickly in response. You surely couldn’t have asked for a better boyfriend

[etherrreal]

“sweet on you”

Pairing: osamu x gn!reader Genre: fluff WC: 1,168 Summary: you’re on a mission to confess to osamu and you’re hoping that he’ll get the hint with some tasty homemade desserts Warning: there are like 2 puns that are the worst, im so sorry. A/N: sooo, this came out longer than intended lol hope you don’t mind that I can’t write a drabble! but this idea just inspired me to much that I couldn’t help myself! -Luna

Mission "Confess-to-Osamu" began the day after the Inarizaki volleyball team won an intense game, the final set ending in a 32-30 win.

You had to stay up all night to do it, but you managed to make and decorate a dozen cookies shaped like volleyballs and one special cookie that resembled his jersey, the number 11 written carefully in chocolate-flavored icing. You wrapped them up in a cellophane bag, complete with a black ribbon tied into a neat bow.

You arrived at homeroom as early as possible, wanting to place the cookies on his desk and sit down to calm your nervous heart. From the back of the room, you watched as he strolled in 20 minutes later, sending you a wave and a tired smile. He dumped his bag on the floor before picking up the note you tucked under the bag of cookies that read:

'congratulations on your win! you played an amazing game, wish I could've celebrated with you :)'

His eyebrows scrunched as he racked his brain to try to figure out whose handwriting it could be. He shrugged when nothing came to mind, figuring it was just another gift from one of those fangirls who frequented his team’s volleyball matches. At the very least, it gave him something to rub in Atsumu’s face later.

He sat down, munching on one of the volleyball-shaped cookies, which he found delicious enough to eat two more of. You slapped your forehead, more annoyed at yourself rather than Osamu.

Okay, time to try something else.

You made a single-serve raspberry tart this time after you heard Osamu mention to his friends one day that he had a strong craving for one. Again, you arrived early to school, placing the note face down under the treat and spoon so none of your nosy classmates could read it as they walked by.

This time, you made sure to sign your initials at the end of the note, figuring that was the reason why it didn't click for him last time. However, knowing that he would immediately figure out that it was you had your palms sweaty and knees weak.

Osamu walked into homeroom, barely awake, but when he saw the dessert on his desk, his eyes shot open, face lighting up with interest. He looked up to greet you, but you were busy staring blankly at your textbook. The cookies from last time had been devoured before he even left school, though he did save the jersey cookie because he appreciated the effort put into it.

He lifted the tart to grab the note that was stuck underneath. It read:

'hope you liked the cookies from last time! I made a raspberry tart because you're just so sweet ♥'

When you peeked over to look at him, you noticed that there was confusion written all over his face, not knowing what the hell the letters at the bottom stood for. You heard him repeating word combinations that began with your initials to try to figure it out.

Your forehead hit the desk, baffled by how a man could be so cute but so stupid.

This was going to be it. You would place the slice of apple pie on his desk, he would read the note–with your whole name on it this time–and he would finally understand how much you liked him.

So, you went through the same process as before, setting it neatly on his desk with a folded note underneath.  There was no way that he could misconstrue anything this time.

Osamu was suspicious when he saw the sweet treat on his desk that morning. He reached for the note first, like always, to examine it.

'I hope you're not occu-pied this weekend ; want to go on a date with me?'

He knew that you would never be so blatant with your confession, not with your shy nature. Not when all it took was a simple wave from him to make you blush and look away. You'd most likely approach him in a less public setting to ask him out, or text him privately.

Which is why he assumed that this entire thing was just his brother pranking him with some store-bought pie. ‘Tsumu had teased him recently when he’d gushed about how cute you were before. He didn't put it past his brother to mess with him just because he kicked his ass in practice yesterday.

He sat down at his desk with a loud 'humph,' angrily digging into his pie that tasted just as good as the rest of his desserts he had received before.

Meanwhile, you were so frustrated that you swore you felt your soul leave your body.

You'd had enough. The stress of leaving Osamu desserts and waiting for him to figure out how much you liked him was too much. You were just going to have to be blunt and in his face with your confession.

Storming into class with a packaged cupcake in hand, you stopped right in front of his desk. He was taken aback by your sudden appearance.

"Oh, hey, (Y/N)," he greeted. "That's a good lookin' cupcake ya got there. Who's it for?"

You froze. You knew your newfound confidence could only last so long. Actually standing in front of his desk and looking into his eyes was very different from staring at yourself in the mirror as you rehearsed your lines.

Osamu watched as your mouth flapped open and closed, thinking about how you resembled a goldfish at that moment. Suddenly, you shoved the cupcake towards him, looking away shyly.

He barely heard you squeak out the words, "I like you."

He had never felt more stupid than he did in that moment. It finally dawned on him that it had been you the whole time, leaving him the edible gifts and little notes. It actually was your attempt at asking him out.

Osamu gently took the plastic container out of your hands, fingers brushing against yours. "I can't believe it was actually you. Thought it was my stupid brother prankin' me."

You failed to make eye contact with him despite chuckling at his assumption, instead toying with the buttons of your blazer.

They’re so adorable. He had to put you out of your misery. "Do ya still wanna go on that date with me? It's the least I can do for all the trouble I caused. Maybe I can cook for you this time?"

You nodded in response, feeling like you were going to combust at any moment.

"Great! We can walk home together, and I'll whip ya up something good to eat."

"Sounds good," you said once you found your voice. 

Your cheeks were no doubt on fire as you sat at your desk. You assumed that at any moment, you'd be waking up from this wonderful dream. There was no way you could predict that he'd reciprocate your feelings but now that you knew, you didn't think you'd ever stop smiling.

Written by: Luna

[sweetberrysmooch]

HC: Call This The ‘Can This Man Cook’ Section

(….. I don’t think these men can cook 😔)

First post pog :D I wrote a majority of these super late at night, so please forgive and let me know of any mistakes you find <3 Also, it’s a little long lol

Characters: Dream, George, SapNap, Badboyhalo, Wilbur, Technoblade, Philza, Quackity, Fundy, Schlatt.

Warnings: None, except for a kinda risqué comment in Philza’s. Oh and I guess there’s mentions of eating meat in case someone wants the warning :3

Song Recommendation: I Love You So- The Walters

Hella fluffy! Hope you enjoy <3

From best to worst:

#1: BadBoyHalo-

Bad is the best at cooking on the server. He is the creme of the crop, absolute top one percent, king shit at cooking.

He can cook, bake, and temper chocolate perfectly, what more could you want?

His favorite to-go recipes are cheesy garlic bread and a special spicy chicken and rice recipe which he typically makes when the boys are over at his house for the night. When he’s with you he goes for something a little smoother, some mulled sweet berry cider with a smoked cod fillet, eaten under the light of candles while you quietly chat about life and your fellow friends. It’s always one of Bad’s most anticipated hangouts, and he’s very careful about planning when it comes to those days.

While he appreciates being complimented on his food or his skills, deep down he wants to have someone to cook and share his knowledge with so the cooking process becomes much richer. He’s cooked for so long and learned so much, but it means nothing if he can’t share it with another person. The moment you come to him and ask him for help on any kind of recipe, he’ll drop almost everything to help you.

Side note; he absolutely carried lunch and dinner for his fellow DTeam members. While Sapnap would mostly take over breakfast, Bad would be hounded by begging puppy looks from these adult men who couldn’t cook and kind of just sigh and get the ‘kiss the cook’ apron ready. It’s not like he hates it or anything, but the endearing factor kinda slips off after a few years of adult men groveling.

(Bad’s hands rest over yours, dwarfing them entirely as he helps you cut the pasta sheet straightly. “There you go!” He encourages, squeezing your hand gently and stepping away, moving back to dice the vegetables on the cutting board next to you. A comfortable silence falls, and with it comes something in Bad’s heart softening. The worries and exhaustion in his mind ease, and he slips into a contented routine of finely chopping and slicing. It’s been a while since he’s felt so calm. There’s nothing that can ruin this- 

The front door slams open. Footsteps walk in and approach the kitchen and you both hear it, 

“Baaaaaaaaad.” Bad cringes, taking a step back.

“Baaaaaaaaaaad, we’re hungry.” Sapnap. 

“Yeah Bad, feeeeeeeed uuuuuuus.” George. 

And then, from around the door frame, a white mask peeks in. Nobody says a word, but you can feel Bad deflate next to you like let go balloon. 

“It’s alright, big guy.” You laugh, grabbing his forearm and leaning up against him. His sad puppy eyes make you smile a little, and you try to reassure him. “We can hang out alone another time. Let’s keep working on the pasta.” He sighs, but still returns your smile. “Yeah, another time.”)

#2: Philza 

Sigh…. he can cook. Not quite as good as Bad can, but better than Quackity. A solid second place. It stems mainly from being so knowledgeable that he just knows and has tried so many different foods, but since he doesn't actually do much cooking, I'm making him a flaky second place.

Doesn’t mind cooking, but doesn’t love doing it either. He’s always focused on so many different things that he’ll forgo eating to keep working on what he’s doing. He mostly cooks for Techno and Ranboo or the few guests (you) they seem to receive. Makes great stew, and even better roasted chicken, is absolutely immaculate when it comes to cooking bird.

He didn’t teach Wilbur or Techno shit! I wish I could say it’s because he wanted to but just couldn’t, but he was literally like “hmm. Im a little busy now, maybe next year” every year!! But, this being said, if you ask him to make something with you or teach you how to cook a particular dish, he will agree to help you. Old age has really mellowed him out, and after certain events, he realizes he needs to stay a bit closer to those he cares about from now on.

He likes sweets well enough, and will always thank you for any gifts you make for him. Along with growing older, he’s had time to lose his pickiness he had in his youth. If he does end up cooking with you, he’ll prefer doing the harder recipes over easy ones. He will lose it laughing if it turns out bad, so don’t worry about any disappointment (his children make up enough of that ^^).

(“Now,” Phil starts, washing his hands quickly as you wait for him next to the cutting board. “Pufferfish needs to be prepared perfectly, or we will die when we eat it. But I don’t need to explain to you how a pufferfish works, now do I?” 

When you shake your head no, he comes up behind you, tarnished wings bound and hair pulled up in a pony tail. 

“The meat of a pufferfish is very delectable, and much better with a glass of wine.” He grins cheekily, “ If this works out well, which I’m sure it will, dinner will be delicious.” 

It falls quiet for a second, and as your hesitantly looking over the fish that may be your last, you gasp when you feel him press up against you back and rest his chin on your shoulder. “Maybe there’ll be other delicious things to eat as well,” He murmurs into you ear, before leaning back and busting out laughing. Your face feels stupidly hot. Dilfza quest activated.)

#3: Quackity-

Quackity:

Quackity can cook. I know!! I’d say he’s like the third best cooker on the list. And he’s not half bad at baking either.

He likes making up stupid bad recipes and trying them out with you, even if at the end of it the one of you up chucks your damned creations the hour after. Despite his reigning need for chaos though, he knows how to make a decent amount of recipes and strives for praise when he’s actually putting forward effort. He’ll arrange little dinner dates (“A handsome man and his very pretty friend, good food made by yours truly, and La Chona, what do you say, baby?”) and will sit there with a 🥺 look on his face until you tell him if you liked it or not.

He tries to act like he’s unaffected by your words, but even a small, “That was really good.” will make him turn red and giggle like a schoolgirl. He tries to play it off, but it’s easy to tell he loves the complements. Will also never tell you anything you make is bad. You are a deity descended upon  minecraft Earth and he is but your prettiest disciple who will uphold your honor and treat you like you should be treated!!!! But he’ll then promptly choose to help you with and guide you into cooking/baking better ^^; He loves you!

As for baking, he really likes making cakes because of how simple they can be. It helps calm him down when he can just slip into bake mode and follow a recipe and make something nice at the end of it. Speaking of, he also has a sweet tooth, but not quite as bad as Techno does. Any sweets or food you make for him is always eaten, and always held in high regard. Will try to entice you into feeding him 👀👀 so watch out.

(He’s doing it again. You try to avoid looking directly at the dopey lovesick smile Quackity has on his face at the moment, but as you lift the fork up, you get a better idea. 

You look at him (to which he seems to melt a little under your gaze), look at the fork, and then back to him, raising the piece of cake up to his lips. His expression turns flabbergasted and his blush deepens. 

He doesn’t seem to believe you for a second, until you nudge the cake close and flash him a smile. Then it’s like a switch has been flicked; he giggles, blushing, and eats the cake right off the fork. He’s gone back to smiling that silly smile again, this time even brighter, but it’s okay. You try to ignore the way your heart speeds up in your chest when he begs you for another piece.)

#4: Schlatt-

Another cooker~! He specializes with formal dinners more than anything else, and adores a good steak.

During his presidency, he didn’t cook very often. Quackity and you had to keep him fed through most of it, and the memory of watching you cook in his kitchen while he looked over work papers at his dining table leaves a mark on him, sealing a new crave for domesticity that he hadn’t ever wanted before.

Sometimes he would cook though. You, Quackity, and Tubbo would all gather around and eat together every once in a blue moon, when Schlatt was sober and calm. It feels tense at the table but also not in a way? Schlatt always seems to be chillest during dinner, a mix of the alcohol wearing off and the emphatic family feel that comes with Tubbo, Quackity, and you surrounding him.

He loves cake! It’s one of the few desserts he’ll eat, but you have to watch him closely or he’ll gorge himself of the treat. Indulge him and invite him to make a cake with you, and it will be one of the most interesting bakes of your life. How Schlatt got three eggs to stick to the ceiling is beyond you, but the look in his eyes tells you he’s completely fucking sober and hamming up his own cluelessness. You probably wouldn’t have even noticed if it weren’t for him hiding all the other eggs around your kitchen as well. How did he get one on the top of your door without it falling when you opened it? That’s between him and god.

Overall, a good 4th place on the list.

(“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Schlatt says, deadpanned, looking you right in the fucking eyes with an undisturbed egg sitting perfectly straight on his head. 

“Where are the eggs, Schlatt.” 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” 

“Schlatt.” 

“Yes.” 

The container you kept them in is completely empty on your kitchen counter, once full of eggs but now reduced to a desolate husk of its former glory. Speaking of former glories, your president turns around, arms crossed and stands there silently. 

You look around. Theres one in the door handle of in the pantry, another wedged between two slices of bread in your bread box, and- oh god. On the fucking ceiling. Three, stuck to the ceiling, unmovable. After a full minute of dead silence you manage a “What the fuck have you done?”, and Schlatt turns to look. 

“Oh hey. There they are.” Your mind turns into a rock, shatters, and crumbles into dust.)

#5: Dream-

Honestly if you’re looking for edible food that tastes range from ok to good Dream is your man. 5th place.

He knows a lot of ‘depression era’ type recipes just because he’s pretty homeless and his man hunts don’t allow him much time to hone his skills. Stuff like bread or mushroom stew comes easy to him after so many times of having to do it on the run. Bread is the only baking he won’t screw up.

Can cook meat well enough too, but doesn’t really do anything special to it (besides his sauces).

To elaborate: Over the unknown span of his life, he’s acquired these recipes for forgotten and questionable sauces that he’ll store in little jars and leave at your house for you to use. They’re odd, and the ingredients aren’t ever what you think might be edible, but they’re surprisingly tasty none the less. He likes to show you a new one every month or so to keep things fresh.

Pretty general about sweets, but has a severe love for chocolate, especially dark chocolate. Has never had one, but dreams about chocolate cake. It’s high on his bucket list and written another four times over.

One of his favorite things to do with you is bake, mainly because of how ruinous it always turns out. No matter your skill, Dream’s vibes decimates any luck the two of you will have while baking. It’s scientifically proven. You left the cupcakes in for a minute-JUST a minute over what they should’ve been and they came out rock solid. Dream tried to eat one anyway. Best part was watching him try to bite through the shell.)

(He thinks he’s over selling it, half-gnawing on the brown cupcake (it was supposed to be vanilla, he thought) and making stupid growls when his teeth barely break through the surface, but the feeling he gets when you start laughing hysterically next to him wipes away any negative thought he had and fills him with utter joy. 

It's very late into the night, and you’re both a little loopy, but all the while you still lean against him as you giggle, the spot tingling where your hand rests on his arm. 

His heart thumps crazily, before sinking. Oh god. He’s in love with you.)

#6: Technoblade-

Knows a lot, but very little. He can cook the meat perfectly fine, but there’s a difference between being cooked and tasting good. He doesn’t know how to season them. Salt is the bare minimum you get.

6th place ^^; sorry king.

He’s good with potatoes though. I like to think that the countless hours spent potato farming had to account for something. He likes having cheese and butter on them every once in a while, but for the most part just eats them salted like an animal. It’s practically a show to watch him eat a cooked potato in three bites without anything but salt on it.

Big man loves food though, even if he doesn’t eat like it. Steak and cooked fish are high on his list of foods, but only if it’s cooked by Philza. And eventually you fall into his “I trust to eat this from you” category as well, but he has a special place in his heart for Phil’s cooking. Rabbit stew is at the very top.

He also eats a lot, being 6’10 and 200 something pounds of muscle, gotta consume quite a bit to keep him moving.

As for the sweeter variety of food, he’s got a massive sweet tooth. The moment you make him an apple pie or honey candy or anything of the like, he’s immediately enamored with you. Sweet things are hard to come by on the smp, especially with how far out he lives, but it’s a secret weakness of his that is very easily exploitable.

(You’ll be the death of him, he thinks, watching you closely as you trudge your way through the freshly fallen snow towards his house. Your normal pack is lighter than it usually looks, and he worries that you may slip and hurt yourself on the ice before you make it to the door. But still, you keep walking until you're standing at his doorstep, fist raised to knock when he opens it for you. 

You look surprised for a second, and then a grin splits your face and his heart races. 

“I can’t stay for long,” you say, having spent at least 30 minutes to get there. “But I wanted to drop this off for you before you went out to hunt again.” 

Out of the bag, you pull another smaller leather bag and hand it to him gently. It rests heavy in his palm, and for a moment he’s sure it’s ender pearls that you’ve brought him. But still he opens it, and he’s immediately taken aback by the smooth golden candies you brought him. 

“They’re honey candies.” At this point you’re practically grinning. “I thought you might like some while I was making them last night.” 

He doesn’t have to see his own face to feel the deep blush setting in on his cheeks and ears. You…. you’re so…… sweet. You are very…. sweet, he admits to himself, and he is very not attached to you. Not at all.)

#7: Fundy and Sapnap tie.

Fundy- 

Has his old man's cluelessness but is a fast learner. He doesn’t have much time to expand his food repertoire so it’s pretty much the basic stuff that he’s eaten during the war or before that when he was younger.

He really likes cooking though, and will invite you to come cook with him for dinner or lunch if he wants to hang out. When they were together, Dream had given him an old dusty cookbook that had several recipes he hadn’t ever heard of before, so that’s where most of what he tries to make comes from. His favorite to date was a special mutton dish that he asked you to try with him on his last birthday. It was just the two of you, but he had never had so much fun before.

Doesn’t like eating fish however, there’s just some bad vibe he gets when he thinks about cooking one or catching one. (Desperately ignores the fish fucker. Desperately ignores the fish fucker. Despera-)

Loves sweet berries as treats, seeing as that’s the only sweet thing he grew up with. Not too big on other sweet flavors. Likes honey in his tea though.

7th place cooker, will get higher as he learns more dishes.

(He raises his wine high with a laugh, clinking your glass with it as you both giggle drunkenly. 

The lamb you had cooked together turned out amazing, juicy and tender and flavored with crimson fungus juice. The recipe was from an old cookbook he had, he faintly remembers telling you, hiding the fact that it was Dream’s cookbook that he was given after a particularly nasty argument. 

He doesn’t want to think about him, especially not while he’s with you. Especially not when it’s his birthday. 

So instead he ponders the trip through the nether he took with you to harvest some of the fungi, how the juice was tangy and slightly bitter, but how it had done wonders when basted onto the meat while frying. 

You had looked so happy when you two plated the dish, so proud of him, all in a way that Dream never was. 

Even now, as you tiredly smile at him from across the table, cheeks pink and eyes focused solely on the moment you were sharing, he feels at peace for once. This is what contentment felt like. Oh, how he loves you so.)

Sapnap-

Shame the shit cooker. Ok ok, he’s not as bad as some of the others on this list, but that’s just because he can make a half decent breakfast. It’s not much competition.

Bad has desperately tried to teach this boy some cooking besides eggs and toast, but the only things that seem to have stuck are mashed potatoes and grilled pork chops. Neither of which he even likes enough to make often.

He prefers fish to meat, and would eat any kind of cod you offered to him. Likes smoked salmon a lot, it’s something Bad made for him a lot when he was younger. He tries to recreate the dish, but comes up short and feels disheartened when it isn’t like Bad’s. He’d appreciate any time you took with him to learn how to make the dish, and it wholly sticks to his mind afterwards. He never forgets the experience, and treasures it very closely.

Likes not-sweet sweets. Not bitter per say, but just not very sweet. He likes chewy taffy in particular, but the old lady kind that lasts 60 years but gets hard in 6 minutes after being exposed to open air. Gotta be polite about it too, or he’ll end up embarrassed and pout for an hour.

(He’s eaten 6 of those fucking taffies since you sat down on the couch, completely straight-faced as the two of you of you listen to Dream and George talking. 

At this point you’re completely checked out of their conversation, solely focused on the taffy Sapnap keeps eating. Where does he even get those? How many does he have?? You’ve been friends with him long enough to have seen him pop a taffy every other second of the day. He seems to have a stash on him at all times tucked away, filled with paper-wrapped pastel covered sweets. 

“Want one?” Sapnap asks, holding out a light blue taffy with a little star drawn in yellow dye on the wrapper. 

“What?” Startled, you lean back a bit and realize you had been staring him down as he ate, and flush with how rude that probably seemed. 

“Want a taffy? I don’t mind sharing with you, cutie.” He winks and offers the taffy again. “....” You gaze at the taffy curiously. You’ve never seen him offer another person one of his precious taffies before. Hmm. “...Yes, thanks.” 

You take it delicately, unwrapping the wrapper and taking a bite of it experimentally. It’s very lightly sweet, soft and chewy and surprisingly pleasant. 

Sapnap watches you from the corner of his eye, softly smiling when he sees you eat the rest of it. Glad to see someone else has good tastes around here.)

#8. George-

Meager man makes a meager meal. I said what I said!!! This flatbread boy knows diddly squat, and the only things he can cook successfully are bread and mushroom soup. Which he will make. And that’s all he’ll make. Any food that isn’t that is cooked by either Bad or Dream, and he’s still picky about it.

He’ll make you the soup and bread ladies and gents. I’m not saying they’ll taste great together, but he will definitely make them for you. Anything else he’s pretty critical about, and he doesn’t care much for treats or dessert. He does occasionally like dark chocolate though, which he and Dream will beg Bad to make for them. Soon he begs you to make it for him, and then you have to go ask Bad how he makes it so George won’t complain about how it tastes different from Bads. It’s a weird situation. You make a lot of chocolate. Dream and George linger at your house for weeks on end until you get fed up and shoo them away with a broom.

To his credit, even though he can’t cook much, he’s really proud of his mushroom stew. Any time you let him cook, his go-to is his mushroom stew. He likes to feed you and know that you’re not hungry somewhere, and to top it off he gets to show you his prized dish; not Bad’s or Dream’s stew, but his. He’s cute or whateva…

(George places the bowl down in front you, stepping back and turning to grab his own, before sitting down next to you. He immediately begins to eat, and you give him a half glance as you bring the soup up to smell it. 

It… doesn’t smell that bad, actually. Not burnt, at least. You spoon some of the soup into your mouth. 

Despite all you’ve seen of George’s cooking, this is pretty well made. It’s nice and warm, and the flavors are rich and the mushrooms soft. You choose to ignore the small smile of his face next to you, and keep eating your soup quietly together.)

#9: Wilbur

Wilbur can’t cook for shit. Literally nothing. This man knows apples grow from trees and that animals are made of meat and that’s it.

You think Wilbur made any of his food when he was president or exiled or ever? Not a chance. He ate anything given to him, Tubbo and Tommy absolutely brought this man all the food they could find so he wouldn’t get eat straight trash or starve throughout the presidency. Techno slid him bare cooked potatoes in Pogtopia and he thought “oh this slaps….. this is the pinnacle of food”

Which I know, not really sexy. But! This means that the moment you feed him something a step up from a bare cooked potato he is in food heaven. He especially loves saucier kinds of foods with lots of flavor and spice to them, it’s just so fucking good. Food becomes his kryptonite after you feed this silly man.

With sweets, however, he isn’t that much of a fan. He does like those small lemon creme crackers, and you and da boys are the only ppl he’ll share them with.

(You hear him before you see him. The familiar clambering at your window draws your attention away from the pork you were dicing, and one look over your shoulder shows a disheveled but grinning Wilbur. 

“I hope I’m not too late for dinner.” He jokes, brushing off his pants before approaching you to press a kiss to your temple. Soon after that you hear another set of clambering, and two pairs of stomps reveals one Tommy and one Tubbo respectively. 

“What’s for dinner tonight, mate?” 

“Hope you don’t mind if we join in!” 

You sigh, turning back to hide your smile before they can see it.)

// Hope you enjoyed! I might write a pt2 of this later with some other ppl in it lol we’ll see :3

[venfx]

magnus fic roundup

as tma comes to a close, i thought i'd post some of my favorite fics to come out of this fandom. most of these are classics, listed in no particular order.

A Weather In The Flesh by @cuttoothed​ | 3K | S1-S4 | Jon/Martin | Complete

"There is a span of years where Jon doesn’t touch anyone other than the occasional hand shake. It’s not so bad. He’s never been someone who’s needed physical affection."

Jon has never been any good at making people want to stick around.

↳ this is such a well-done exploration of jon’s character and his relationship with touch, and i’ve re-read it at least five times. sweet and sad and phenomenally well-written.

in the chillest land and on the strangest sea by imperfectcircle, singlecrow | 20K | Safehouse, S1-S4 | Jon & Daisy, Jon/Martin | Complete

Jon remembers a statement he read years ago given by a Jesuit priest, who said that the shortest prayer he knew was, just, fuck it, as in fuck it; it's in God's hands. He takes Daisy's hand and trails on after her.

or; hope is a thing with feathers.

↳ hey, you wanna fuckin..... feel things? read this.

The Magnus Institute vs the 21st Century: a series of emails and IMs by shinyopals | 26K | Series | S3 | Pre-Jon/Martin | Complete

The Magnus Institute hires a Data Protection Officer. He sets about diligently booking in meetings, writing policy documents, and training all the staff in the importance of confidentiality. Now if only he could get hold of the Head Archivist, who seems to have vanished again...

(Jon is only trying to save the world, but apparently some people think he should still be doing his day job.)

↳ i’d be surprised to find people who haven’t read this series, but it’s the definition of “the magnus archives is a workplace comedy”. also, alasdair stuart has actually read some clips of this on Twitch, so that’s a fun bonus.

Bell, Book, and Candle by yellow_caballero | 102K | Series | S3 into S4 | Jon/Martin | Complete 

In accordance with the Ride or Die Pact of 2009, Jonathan Sims can call upon Georgie Barker at any time for aid with no strings attached. Despite their rocky history, their childhood friendship, and Jon’s barely recovered alcoholism, this pact is sacred and must be upheld.

Georgie Barker may regret this. She may regret it when she discovers that the world is full of monsters and eldritch gods and dickhead managers. She may regret it when a punk rocker who should be dead collapses on their doorstep, a teenager again who needs their help. She may regret it when her stupid ex-boyfriend starts selling his soul for knowledge and the ability to keep his new family safe.

But she probably won’t. Georgie isn’t scared of anything - not a Clown’s apocalypse, not the apocalypse that Jon is destined to begin, and not Jon’s own loss of humanity.

Maybe she should be.

↳ if you’re looking for an everyone-lives-no-one-dies-happy-ending fic that also happens to be massively chaotic, look no further. 

The Reverb in These Holy Halls by @wolftraps​ | 98K | AU, S1-S4 | Jon/Martin | Complete

Undoing the apocalypse would have been enough for Jon, if all his people survived. Without them, Jon's only recourse is making it so it never happened in the first place. He's going to do better this time.

↳ quintessential time travel AUs. plot-wise, i feel like these can be difficult to write, but op does a fantastic job of tying things together in a way that makes sense. plus, it’s just fun to read.

jon sims v the nhs by @thoughtsbubble​ | 12K | Series | S3 | Complete

Joan Bright has a new patient. He's carrying an old tape recorder and is covered head to toe in scars. Jonathan Sims looks dangerous, but Dr Bright has dealt with all sorts of atypical individuals. She has no reason to be nervous.

Right?

↳ if you’ve ever thought “hey, jon should probably go to therapy”, then 1) you’re absolutely right and 2) this is... probably what would’ve happened. prior knowledge of The Bright Sessions is not required. also, apparently, this fic is written by the showrunner of The Underwood Collection? wild.

Family, Found by Dribbledscribbles | 9K | S4 | Complete

It’s Basira who catches onto it.

The collective shift that seems to come over them when heading in or out of the Institute. Not just the oppressive sensation of being observed, their every move catalogued for the voyeuristic cravings of some unseen Eye(s). That feeling remained with them even when they left the Institute these days, but it was always stronger inside its walls. That wasn’t the change. Nor was it the point.

The point was: making life worse for Jonathan Sims.

↳ i think being part of the avengers fandom circa 2012 has given me permanent found-family-trope brainrot, but you know what. jonathan sims can have a little happiness, as a treat. 

Road to Damascus by @titanfalling​ | 107K | Series | S4 | Jon & Tim | Complete

n. an important moment of insight, typically one that leads to a dramatic transformation of attitude or belief

Or, in which Tim becomes an avatar for the end of all things.

↳ tim dies and then he doesn’t. there is catharsis and world building. just....read it.

Come, Change Your Ring With Me by @backofthebookshelf​ | 29K | S3 | Peter/Jon, Jon/Martin, Peter/Elias | Complete

The Lukases demand the Archivist marry into the family, and the Institute relies on them too much to say no. Peter is smug. Elias is fuming. Martin is suffering. Jon thinks this might be tolerable if only Peter would hurry up and leave him alone already.

OR, the soap opera we call an Archives revolves around Peter Lukas this time.

↳ superb evil-bastards-in-love content, feat. martin pining, tim being obnoxious, and jon being... well, tired, mostly. i will literally never get tired of how op writes peter. 

creatures that i briefly move along by @dotsayers​ | 16K | Series | AU, Post-S4 | background Jon/Martin 

Mr Sims was so weird, was the thing. Miss Grant always said calling people weird was rude, and Anna sort of agreed, but she didn’t know what other word to use to describe Mr Sims.

He’d only been in with the class for a few days, really, and half of that he just sat at the back listening, but that didn’t stop her from making a swift judgement. 5BG had had student teachers before, back when they were 3ST, and they’d been uniformly normal.

Mr Sims was… actually, Anna had a better adjective. He was interesting.

↳ i just.... love teacher!jon fics. this series delivers. 

Once Bitten by @apatheticbutterflies | 1K | S4 | Jon & Daisy | Complete

Jon Sims has always been a jumpy kind of guy. Nervous. Twitchy. Daisy used to think it meant he was guilty. Turns out he was. Just not of what she’d thought.

Daisy learns how to peel an orange.

↳ daisy and jon’s relationship is an example of an instance where i’m happy to say “fuck what you wrote mr. jonny ‘chocolate torte of tragedy’ sims, i want them to be friends”.

pins and needles by mutterandmumble | 13K | S1-S4 | Complete

He’s got a reputation to uphold anyways; an uptight, rigid reputation that dictates the way that he interacts and functions and is such an integral part of him that he can’t let go of it anytime soon. He likes his safety nets. He likes his contingencies. He likes his privacy, and everything around this place right down to the walls seems to have ears, so he’ll stay tight-lipped up to and beyond the threat of death.

He’s good at that.

In which Jon takes up embroidery and bumbles through life the best that he can.

↳ out of all the introspective jon pieces i’ve read (and there are many), this one stands out. maybe it’s the symbolism or the characterisation, or maybe it’s the fact that i have an embroidery kit lurking in the back of my closet along with a hundred other half-pursued hyperfixations. whatever. this is excellent.

sleeping in by @ivelostmyspectacles | 5K | S2 | Jon/Tim | Complete

“Who are you trying to convince?”

Jon gives up, letting his head sag against Tim’s shoulder. “I don’t know.”

aka Elias gets tired of Jon and Tim's bickering, sends them away for a "team-building" weekend trip, and is sure to book them a room with only one bed

↳ this has everything you’d need from a “oh no there’s only one bed” fic. someone please get these men therapy.

if you try, sometimes (you get what you knead) by @ajcrawly​ | 3.5K | S1-S4 | Jon/Martin, Tim/Sasha | Complete

It starts with an abundance of boeuf bourguignon and ends up as a team tradition.

Food and love in uncertain times.

↳ more found family fic, this time with a diverse og!archival staff and food as a metaphor for love. hurt in all the right ways. made me hungry in the process.