#'my diet is ruined!!'

[heyytalia]

I'm seeing the new Puss in Boots movie tomorrow, so to prepare myself, I've been binge-watching all of the Shrek movies and the first PIB just to refresh my memory.

In sum:

Shrek 1: Still an absolute masterpiece. I feel the older I get, the more I appreciate it and the music. 9.5/10

Shrek 2: Somehow, it's even more perfect than the first one. The "I Need a Hero" sequence is just as iconic as it always was, and there are several other scenes that still make me crack up every single time (like the fast food one). 10/10

Shrek the Third: Arguably the weakest film on this list. Some good ideas, but the plot never seems to come together cohesively, and most of the jokes don't land, unfortunately. 5.5/10

Shrek Forever After: While it's not as strong a Shrek film as the first two, I still think it's a solid movie overall. Lots of really emotional scenes, and Rumpelstiltskin is a decent villain. (Side note: I've felt for a long time the Rumpelstiltskin story would make for an interesting Disney adaptation if done well. Mouse House, get on it!) I think it's underrated, IMO. 8/10

Puss in Boots: Overall fun, creative, action-filled movie. Can be a tad predictable at times, but all the good stuff and cute kitties make up for it. 7.5/10

I'm now prepared.

[videos-i-didnt-make]

coke.mp4

[thehollowwriter]

I've witnessed first hand how fucking awful an overly controlling and manipulatuve mother can be.

It destroys your mental health. It makes you question your own worth and intelligence. It makes you unsure of who or what to believe. It makes you terrified of others perceiving you in anything but a positive light. And that's just mentally.

When people say Riddle's backstory was "tame" I want to strangle them because no, no it fucking wasn't. Just because she (supposedly) isn't beating him doesn't mean he has a "less bad" or "less tragic" childhood.

[yuzuteashop]

'Are You Sure?!' Teaser Trailer: Food

[knightofleo]

[goodluckdetective]

If I wrote down every food people told me not to eat because it was “bad for me” I don’t think I’d have anything food options left.

[squidong]

I saw someone insisting ADHD never impacts anyone’s dietary habits, and now I’m curious what people actually experience.

This is about things like skipping meals because you don’t realize you’re hungry, or snacking even though you’re stuffed because you hope the food will give you the boost you need to get this one task finished.

[the-hilda-librarians-wife]

I was rewatching The Stone Forest and I really like to think that Hilda had to pass by the Bell Keeper’s outpost on her way out of the city limits. I like to think that idiot looked at what was happening, shrugged, and said ‘eh, she’s the scariest thing out there’

[bodypositiviteaandcakes]

If you’re feeling like a raging bitch for no discernible reason, you’re probably hungry. Go have a snack. I don’t care if your stomach isn’t growling, just go eat a cookie or smth.

[i-just-want-tobe-thin]

is there a way to burn calories that doesn't include using my legs at all? I have shin splints in my right shin and it's excruciating standing on it, even more so walking. So I can't walk, run, or dance to music. I feel like there's not many other options? I don't know!

[distinguished-rave-moth]

Boyfriends stepdad made us dinner,

A horrible Horrible dinner. But dinner nonetheless,

I'm too polite to refuse it,

Now I am horribly Horribly ill,

Let this be a lesson to you, kids.

[iguessyouregonnamissthepantyraid]

tbh i spent my childhood dealing with a lot of bodyshaming and just overall feeling terrible about the way i looked, and there are two things that have been REMARKABLY helpful in putting that shit behind me as an adult. the first is weightlifting, because i love it and it's hard to feel bad about your body when it's capable of squatting 225+ lbs, and i cannot overstate the healing energy of hearing a professional lifter who DOES THIS FOR A LIVING saying "having abs doesn't mean you're strong. having abs just means you're not eating enough" and then proceeding to bulldoze the heaviest barbell you've ever seen in your goddamn life

the second one is being bisexual. reeeally hard to put yourself down when you see a woman with your exact body type and your first thought is "i would very much like that to be on top of me please"

anyway. tl;dr thick thighs truly do save lives 🙏

[skin-slave]

Hey, how do I kill the part of my brain that says I can't have more than one game that features food/restaurants on my phone at one time, or some mysterious "they" will think I'm obsessed with food, and therefore "too comfortable" with eating while being fat, and not "trying to get better," and I'll be given some kind of unnamed punishment?

[thequantumranger]

Feel like shit every waking moment. Goddamn!

[alliswyattonthewesternfront]

the less i know about celebrities, the better. stop trying to make me learn more about their lives than i already do.

[sachermorte]

I wonder what must happen in someone's life that they mistake our beloved 19th century undead austrian noble with a fascist.

Like ma'am, this is Roland. He drinks too many spritzers and hasn't had a good nights sleep in years.

Yes, there will one day be a coup where he will become the Kaiser and rule Austria with a strict but benevolent hand but that's not fascism. That's nature healing.

Anon you've hit the nail right on the head

I fear I was getting a bit more snippy than I'd normally allow myself to be, but my Lord. Chalk it up to the aforementioned not having a good night's sleep in years. She's made my friend forward discord messages with stupid memes to me, one of which being a video titled "MANPONS, tampons for men, because trans men can have a little toxic masculinity as a treat" or something of the like

So not only am I a shoe-in for the far right, I'm toxically masculine

My friend at one point tried to salvage the situation by describing a little of my hypothetical plan to take over the world in the hopes that I would at least laugh over it, but at the first mention of "well we start with Südtirol--"

"Oh the FPÖ would LOVE that!"

"I might be a touch gay for the FPÖ"

"With the number of faggots in that party? You'll fit right in"

When I become Kaiser I'm mandating basic etiquette classes in schools so people learn how to behave towards people they've just fucking met 😩