#'i dislike this' without backing it up.
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iniziare · 4 months ago
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Bronya/Seele. I just get so opinionated about things, it's ridiculous, but consider this a fair warning for some salt relating to what I consider to be an absolutely infuriating ship to have to deal with. It should be prefaced that I'm not against the ship in theory, even if I find the concept of 'one returns to the light, while the other returns to the dark', a bit boring, but I digress. My issue with this blasted dynamic, is how Seele's character is reigned in, time and time again as to make it happen in any capacity.
How is Hoyo able to write such great dynamics way more often than not (yes, of course including ones between female characters, whether done through a lot or little screen-time; ie. Clorinde/Navia, and Beidou/Ningguang), but then looked at Bronya and Seele in HSR and not only absolutely miss the mark, but also actively undo Seele's character as to replicate... HI3's famous F/F ship? And then, what has this caused within the fandom? That anyone who doesn't ship it, is ignoring an F/F ship and therefore should be condemned for social political and representation reasons, while honestly, it simply comes down to the fact that it's not well written from from at least one perspective.
I of course can't touch on Bronya's side of things, but Seele's complete 180 following the revelation that Bronya, too, was an orphan, is absolutely ill-fitting. Would this possibly soften Seele's argumentative nature (that then also was nurtured endlessly throughout the years) a little bit? Sure, but considering how intensely ingrained it is into her character for understandable reasons; it would go excruciatingly slowly. Seele doesn't and wouldn't blush at a thank you, she's likely received enough of them considering her work within Wildfire, and honestly, Bronya isn't exactly someone that Seele would hold in immense admiration so soon (without active evidence)— which if she did at the moment it happens, could explain being lightly taken aback, but alas. Seele and Bronya represent two opposite sides, and as the end of the Trailblazing mission shows, they still argue, and Seele still opposes her. Before yet again, her character is reigned in as to fit into this shipping narrative, instead of having her fiercely defend (and stand up for) what she's very obviously felt strongest about throughout her life, which is the primary reason as to why she's back up in the Overworld to begin with. Let me just present a bit of Seele's second character story:
Before leaving that evening, they sat on a bench in the Executive Plaza as Seele stared at the restaurant opposite them. "Was the Overworld fun, Seele? Wanna come back again later?" "Can I ask you something?" "...What's up? Ask away." "Those Overworlders are only eating half their meal, and threw the rest away." "..." "Do they know that people down below haven't got enough food to eat?" "..." Oleg saw how a look of gloom passed over her tender face. "Let's go back, Oleg. I don't want to come back here again."
And then let me remind you of a cutscene at the end of Belobog's Trailblazing mission, and don't mind me ending the transcript where I'm positive that Seele would have left if it hadn't been for the Astral Express, no matter what Bronya would've said. 'Empty words', after all:
Seele: ...Priorities? What do you mean? Are you saying rebuilding the Underworld isn't one of your "priorities"? Bronya: Of course not! I'm just saying we have limited assets, and we need new parameters. Seele: Assets... parameters... You sure love your fancy words. Seele: Ugh, forget it. Leave it to me. I'll go down myself... Bronya: ...Come on, Seele! I won't leave you to—
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deoidesign · 1 month ago
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One of my first digital pieces (2010) versus one of my recent ones (2024)
We all start somewhere!
#picked these cause they're in a similar pose lol. i mean not at all. but sort of... more than my other art at least...#oh fuck im so tired im saving this to drafts and coming back later#my anxiety meds wipe me the fuck out so im trying not to take them in the day#and they're like legit borderline a sleeping med for me. i take one and in 30 mins im OUT.#so I'm. i mean i was already only taking 1-2 in the day and then 2-3 at night#anyways it makes me sad when people say they dont have an artistic bone in their body#and especially when they say they could never draw like me :(#dont put yourself down to lift me up! i don't want my art to be used for you to be mean to yourself!!!#lots of experiences of people comparing themselves to me and being mean to themself...#feels bad. it's okay if you're slow it's okay to be learning it's okay!!!#I'm me and you're you and we're here to learn from each other. i just wanna hang out..#y'know what I'm just gonna post without saying anything i WILL forget I made a draft#i have so many things i intend to post and then forget#it's a wonder I post anything#i only do it when i get bored. and run out of stuff to scroll through#like whelp. guess if i want a post I have to make one myself.#also the second one is really good idc that it's a study i still drew it#art growth#this was in 2010 btw#i started highschool in 2011#I've grown a lot and you can too.#also I've never really been one to dislike my old art. like idk I was trying... if it's bad I just won't look at it whatever#like i wouldn't be mean to someone else who made that so i don't get a free pass to be mean just cause it's to me#man my thoughts are bungled. okay sleep time#if my phone made typos you didn't see it
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krotiation · 7 months ago
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Even though I don't think Timothy would ever miss Jack per se I imagine that his death still left a void that Tim doesn't know how to fill
Because what exactly do you do when the man who essentially dictated every aspect of your life is now dead? What can you even do when you're still wearing his face? Fuck if Tim knows
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spaghetticat3899 · 4 months ago
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ADHD stop making me easy to upset challenge: impossible
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woolydemon · 9 days ago
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tumblr remains my go-to site to be chronically online on
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not-so-superheroine · 2 months ago
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so like. at the psych treatment center, those in the ed program did exposure therapy off campus.
we went to the movies once (the idea being eating a snack at the movies. i ordered and ate movie popcorn for the first time in forever tbh). and the film the ed program collective (le patients) decided to watch was deadpool and wolverine.
the behavioral health techs were suprised that that was the one. atm, it was all young women, at the time, so maybe that was the suprise. also the violence that would potentially be a trigger for some there. the techs were thinking inside out 2. that would have been "therapeutic" ig, but deadpool 3 probably did us the most good.
but that's how i ended up watching that movie. watching a movie in a theatre was charged to my insurance. wild.
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starlooove · 2 months ago
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Tiktok found supersons and I kinda hate it tbh
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getyinyusedtoit · 3 months ago
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hua cheng and mu qing slander is so funny because it's never anything real it's always just something someone made up in their head.
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phantomoftheorpheum · 7 months ago
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pondscummy · 7 months ago
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the "also sick" comment isn't like "btw I'm SICK, how dare you not know" it's me saying I'm sick like how 2/3 of my roommates are
but like I'm so;;;; it feels so rich that L is like wtf do you want from me about me not replying for 45 minutes when I had to beg his gf over hours and hours of texts every so often to not force me to sit in unwiped shit after my surgery bc she had openly told me she just didn't rly feel like setting up the attachable bidet after telling me for weeks she would, and I never ever got a reply from her or L ever acknowledging that they were wide awake hanging out and laughing while I was like stuck in bed barely able to move begging for follow through on a commitment they made in advance and i eventually had to spend over $100 to hire someone to come out the next day and do it for me and I had to hold my shit for hours lmfao
like L is sooooo great at couching things in flawless tumblr wellness speak but only to talk about how valid they are for not showing up for you and how fucked up it is that you MIGHT ever have a moment where you can't be 100% there w them. like idk what to tell you I've been laying in bed with a sore throat and cough and fever passing out and waking up to roll over in buckets of sweat like the rest of the house. I do genuinely get being annoyed by a lack of response but it's also right back to this whole thing about Always assuming I'm mad at them which is legit one of the only things that actually makes me mad fjdkddhk like bro I do not THINK about you when you're not acting like I'm a bomb about to blow (also, as an aside -- we all take turns buying TP and it's usually me who does it like it's not out of pocket for me to say hey you are the One person who is out of the house already rn, can you get this on your way bc None of the bathrooms have back up rolls and one is totally out and I had to text our sickest roommate telling her to use the bidet and drip dry like.... "am I the first person you asked" yes bc you are the person who makes the most sense dumbfuck. I'm not being "overly needy" toward you or whatever jfc)
they literally told me at one point that the reason they're so scared of me is that my face is "triggering" for them when I'm angry or not feeling good and puts them "back in a really bad place" they have seen my face angry literally 3 times and each time it was on my way back to my room to decompress and each time I said nothing to them other than that I was in a bad mood and I was going to go to my room. I didn't yell either I just said it normal. like I genuinely feel gaslit here like I'm this horrifying monster of a man when it's like dude sometimes people are mad I don't know what YOU want from ME!! I do all my venting here where they can't ever see it even tho we've blocked each other, I censor their name like anyone even knows who they are, I isolate to chill out and it's literally been less than a handful of times like should I fling myself from the roof??????? would that fix it???
I literally know it's bc I'm a man too. none of this was like this until my facial hair came in more and it got crazy worse after I got top surgery and they're so so vocal about how much they despise men and think men should all fuck off and die and there's only a handful of acceptable men that they've personally vetted. despite them pretty clearly having a trans woman fetish bc they only date or look at porn of trans women and they do the whole step on me mommy thing about it even tho their gf has complained like. lmfao you're just a baby te//rf even tho you ID as trans masc yourself. like that's all this even is. I'm a big (5'3") scary (spent the whole weekend w my coworkers asking if I was 12) man who's obviously going to snap and kill you all bc sometimes I *checks writing on hand* get frustrated and go lay down about it
#pond.txt#and again i'm not EVEN mad rn (well. obviously i am *now*) i was SLEEPING like fhekdjdkddjl bro let me live i'm SORRY#should i whip myself should i kiss your feet my lord and savior jc. should i fall upon my sword for you.#is my t dick too big and scary to live together does it cast shadows in the hallways that frighten you HDKSDHKDDHDK#all the time i wish wish wish there was some way for me to move out early without me fucking myself financially#but i'd be on the hook for $11.400 and i do NOT have that to drop dhskddhhfj and i would need to pay that PLUS buy a car#it was so night and day the difference in my mood when i was on my work trip tho. even when i had moments of like feeling down on that trip#it was so fleeting and so like. well I'll do what i need to so i can care for myself#whether that was staying in my room and getting some sleep or rallying and being like hey @ self you're making shit up about no one liking#with no proof so let's get back downstairs and hang out w someone new and prove ourselves wrong.#life felt so bright and happy and it was so easy to talk to strangers and laugh and just let loose and like myself#even on a 13 hr travel day i was like taking notes on mental health things in my journal and reflecting and feeling so positive about makin#changes like not letting excuses stop me from going out and living my life even in this interim period between moves#and then i got back home and was like oh right. this place that makes me miserable with people who openly dislike me. great lmao#my plan is still to try to not let myself get in my own way of living life bc if i can get out & meet people it'll keep me away from here.#ANYWAY!!! *eats cough drops like candy*
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imaginarianisms · 7 months ago
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1 day i will make a meta of sansa's dynamic with her metaphorical champions/suitors & how that correlates to the ashford theory (i.e sansa being betrothed to joffrey baratheon, then promised to willas tyrell, then being married to tyrion lannister, then being married to harry hardying then married to aegon vi targaryen & aurane velaryon but it is not this day. lmao. when i make that meta it'll be so over for y'all.
#just know that. she never marries after aurane. btw lmao#like if he like g-d forbid ever died before she did she'd like. literally never marry or love again like. thats it lmfao#but anyway like. she has a complicated relationship w/ all of them tbh & reflects on them sometimes.#she obviously hates joffrey for him abusing her but like. she can't help but feel sad for him at times bc like. he was so young.#if he had the right people around him maybe he would've turned out okay eventually. but it didnt happen. she never met willas but sometimes#she wondered what it would've been like to be lady of highgarden but she hopes he's doing alright. her dynamic w/ tyrion is. complicated#like. he was never like openly cruel to her or anything & she's grateful to him for saving her life & standing up for her but like.#there's always that grief surrounding their families & i think she resented & mostly afraid of him at the time but in hindsight she's+#grateful that he never hurt her or forced himself on her. harry she hardly knew unfortunately but like she disliked him at first#but then he actually seemed to warm up to her & she had him tied around her lil finger but she knows that she wouldn't like to be married+#to a guy who actually has children w/ sb else. like. she's seen how that played out & while she wouldn't be mean it makes her uncomfortable#but especially surrounding aegon bc like. she's not naive enough to say she loved him but like. she actually LIKED him#like. while she was wary of him at first she warmed up to him & genuinely respected him as a person & most importantly aegon was her FRIEND#they got along rly well due to their similar upbringings & what they had to do to survive & like. he's actually a decent guy in canon. lmao#he's handsome & was chivalrous & honorable & sweet w/ her but also like batshit insane in a good way. like.#he was the golden prince she always wanted since she was a little girl; the prince that joffrey was supposed to be but never was.#he gave her a future as queen of westeros that was originally HERS. so when daenerys eventually executes him she has mixed feelings about i#aegon was good to her & she'd vowed not to betray him & she actually intended to keep that vow. to her she was forever in his debt+#he gave her a future from her isolation & suffering @ winterfell bc of how much everything changed & he waited for her to love him back.#he actually showed her respect & gave her a solid future when she felt alone & abandoned & led her gently into a world of his own making+#& gave her back her honor & a future. esp when the north was divided between jon rickon & herself. most preferred jon or rickon over her.#without aegon's intervention she probably would've had to marry some northern lord below her station. the winterfell succession crisis wild#but aurane velaryon? that's the love of her life. her bold captain. he taught her how to love & coaxed her in the sun to bloom & freed her.#freed her from the chains of her family obligations. he taught her to break the rules of tradition & follow her heart & trust her instincts#he was there with her in her darkest hour. he quite literally saved her life & defended her honor when no one else had the balls to do that#no one looks @ or touches her the way aurane does she loved him madly truly & deeply he took her girlhood in his stride but when autumn cam#she escaped & had to push him into the deepest recesses of her mind in the name of survival & pragmatism but she never stopped loving him.#& his sweet memory brought too much heartache & bittersweetness for her. she lowkey waited for him for years. & they EVENTUALLY reunited !#he fought & got legitimized for HER. she's. so genuinely happy w/ that man. he's one of her best friends & the father to her children.
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anotheruntitledsong · 8 months ago
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i did like the hidden palace but (SPOILER if anyone hasn't read it?) i'm genuinely so annoyed at how Arbeely is handled like... I wish i could be sad but i'm just fucking irritated. I was overly invested in him and that's def why but i just feel like they did him dirty
#the golem and the jinni#i was scrolling goodreads and the take i kept seeing was 'oh I wish Arbeely could've had his family too bad the jinni FUCKED IT UP'#but idk that's just not how i read him. like thats not where i feel the problem is#his whole shtick is being content as the jinni's foil and like! things can change! but the way it's done leaves him totally unresolved#which in turn means the jinni's shit is also never getting resolved because there is like no way to#when Arbeely describes his future family in the first book it's all 'someday... vaguely...' and AGAIN! what you want can change!#and honestly it's really interesting and sad that he makes this sacrifice for the jinni#but it's a layer of complexity that like clashes with how little he is there for and how little the author's invested in him#and like the way the no marriage literally did not ruin his life at all... sure it sucked but the man is still like idk rich#what has continuously fucked with him throughout both books is that he wants (or at least spends half his page time thinking about)#emotional connection to the jinni in a human way#which is something the jinni cant\wont give him even though he's basically Arbeely's only close friend#(besides ig maryam who was rlly funny hinting at her dislike for the jinni like someone trying to get their friend to dump their toxic bf)#anyway the vibe in the first book is that he only thinks about wanting a wife when the jinni is being a dickhead#BECAUSE the jinni eases arbeelys loneliness by just being there because at the end of the day that's what humans need#but then it's made really weird in the second book by Arbeely getting 'trapped' by the jinni (and yet they just grow further apart)#which means that the only thing arbeely actually spent half his life discontent with and then literally died without is not a wife#it's emotional intimacy with the jinni. which is insane to me#arbeely is obviously already tragic but this seems TOO tragic entirely because the book doesn't give af about addressing it#if it was like a plot thing then all of the above would be fine and gutwrenching because it ties back into the jinnis self isolation#BUT IT'S NOT. like i get arbeely isn't that important to the plot but he was important to the jinni and the jinni was important to him#alsoo necessarily disclaimer i'm not trying to say he's in love with the jinni or anything like that#although a queer arbeely (divorced from the above idea) would also been interesting cuz I dont think the jinni has a grasp on homophobia#so idk theyd be keeping each others secrets (arbeely x the biscuit man? JOKE)#BUTTTT! I don't believe he needs romantic energy! him and the jinni having awful vibes up until arbeely's literal death is what bothers me#The jinni is a bad communicator ik but come on... not once? not even before the diagnosis? The jinni also thinks about how distant they are#could they not talk a little? for me? there are ways to do it within the bounds of their characters FOR SURE#im sure this is the point but i do dislike it either way. anyway sorry arbeely u remind me of my uncle#the hidden palace
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lunarcry · 8 months ago
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"It's okay to have to learn how to live on your own, you know. No one ever has all the answers." He's not scared of Fenrir, despite what she is: he could be, if it weren't for the fact that he had bonded himself to an echo of something that had in fact, by all research and all speaking with her himself, been a much more frightening thing in life (it is hard to fear anything knowing what you love could outclass most). Sarunan's ears show a state similar to relaxation, tilted slightly to the side, angled forward, the expression on his face inscrutable. One gloved hand carefully extends, placing itself between the girl's ears -- not rubbing her head or fluffing her hair, just calmly placing his hand there as reassurance. "It doesn't matter how old you are or how long you've been alive. The people on this ship aren't exactly the type who abandon anyone. Trust me."
And what's meant as reassurance has the opposite effect; bored, judging eyes flashing with anger once he touches her, and fangs laid bare.
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"Get your hands off me!!"
However, she doesn't bite. A low growl lingering as she snaps at him and pulls away, it's okay to have to learn how to live alone and they won't abandon anyone, she knew all of that already. Walder had pressed on despite being near death, all for the friend that she herself couldn't save. Io yelled when she had been letting out her frustrations on Rosetta, and despite their earlier fight Lyria had asked if she could put a bow in her hair when Loki had been speaking with them at that annoying island. She knew all of that already.
And still he's yapping about love and peace and acceptance as if he expects her to break down and sob. Who was going to abandon her? Why should she live on her own? Poor little primal beast who was thrown away by her creators and denied by the world. You need help, don't you? You need love, don't you? Everyone on this damn ship acted like him, just shut up.
"Trust you?" she had considered being sarcastic, but that was before he had decided to encroach on her personal space. "All you've done is blabber about yourself, don't try and act like you know me. Why the hell should I care about any of that, you're no better than those researchers who created us for their own selfish gains. Take your ego and go feel good about yourself somewhere else", despite her words, the one who ends up storming off is Fenrir herself. "Gah! I can't stand you people!"
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keeps-ache · 8 months ago
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today! on the agenda we have [tears paper away to reveal the single word 'do'] ...
#just me hi#today on the agenda i've added the words 'draw' and 'make valiant efforts' so >:3👍#//vv has sent me an ask and the sketching. oo it's sketching alright hfhs#am i going to make full character designs for these? probably i have no control in that aspect Hbfhvsfjs#if there is ONE thing i can consistently go all the way with it's character design. i literally could not tell you why that is lmao :3#there are nights where i design whole casts of characters and then Forget About Them ?????? like dude. why did we do all that hbfvh#really i made a cast of like 10 characters one night they all had their signature colours clothes jobs hobbies dislikes and personal#relationships and then i......... never thought about them again hhhfhsh#[holds them up like a wet cat] does anybody want a strange half-baked story with a cast of about 12 people who are all clones of one guy#who's trying to kill them. cuz man hfhsh#//anyway all the sidings from that i think i'm coming out of the Saute Mode#what's Saute Mode? well you see it's when i've already taken out the ready-made good stuff in my brain and now i need to put in new#ingredients and let them get hot and ready again. Saute Mode :3#sure it might just be artblock but i think i need an artbreak sometimes so loll#plus Saute Mode means i get to play viddy games without feeling guilty so YAY :33#but Saute Mode does Also mean i sort of don't. talk to anybody out of my own volition HH#it's the side of the coinage. you understand hfbvhs#//annnnnnywhoodle back to my sketching :>>#posing my wretched beloved.. you are strange and impossible to understand hbvhfs#/:3 toodles !
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gothamcityneedsme · 10 months ago
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also. The start of the game forcing u into the genesis comic feels. Very silly. its a tonal jump from the death to like have sudden narration. It shouldve been framed differently idk. Or just. Not inserted into the story. Anyways.
Love the beginning of this game. Setup is so good. I love Jacob and Mirandas intros. Jacob as the one who tells you the truth, who has a moral compass vs Mirandas sole purpose and drive for two years being to bring you back to life regardless of her impression or opinion of you personally.
#Shitpost#love how miranda responds once you have results too#i love how cold and calculating she is#and like she wouldnt work as well if she wasnt the lead on the project. Her leading it and basically being a huge part of why youre alive#just like. Immediately places her in a fascinating space#also shes basically your XO but also shes reporting back to TIM about you#side note but tbh still mad at how they handled TIM in 3. he just became a villain where hes WAY more interesting here#hes so middle ground nuanced and that sort of dies. A shame tbh#theres a lot i dislike about me3 lol. Not entirely but still#TIM and the ending. And the mechanics with the separate app#is that still up? I hope so. Im playing og mass effect lol#anyways also. Jacob is so interesting too#Hate that he got memed on and ignored by most of the fandom#tbh his loyalty quest is kinda iffy too iirc but his base here is so good#and his comments throughout the game too#Also. I think me could have been fixed if we learned who built the reapers and got into the shit#The theme of organic vs synthetic life couldve been expanded upon#ESPECIALLY since synthetic life literally cant exist without an organic creator#the cycle couldve been MORE is all im saying#the creators couldve built the reapers with that pov. Like a terrible cleansing pov#Organics so convinced organic life is corrupt that they wished to destroy it#and the reapers if shown that truth would realize the hypocrasy. The lie they were built on#Or something#mass effect is so good but the endings are all bad#Thematically they are a little interesting. Esp the ending where you leave it to the next cycle#BUT. like i hate synthesis and control. Those are hard to reconcile with the Themes imo#destroy works but tbh to me. Destroy shouldve ended with a scene of some scientist who believes life is corrupt. Building another AI#an AI to destroy life.#thats all.#Ok ill shut up now
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cleargreyskies · 1 year ago
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It has now been 12 hours after I watched it and I have finally made up my mind that I am underwhelmed by the Ted Lasso finale. (spoilers and typos in the tags)
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