#'all of those are basically impossible to get rid of anyway but the things to try are X Y or Z'
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daisywords · 12 days ago
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#can I just. scream for a second#so as is news to no one#we need to start over the entire us medical system from scratch#also I would like to be flayed alive and start over from scratch in the skin department as well#anyway for context: I've had some kind of rash/acne/infection/irritation all over my legs for over a year now#have tried various products and changed habits and products to try and get rid of it to no avail#everyone said you should really just go to a dermatologist#(I was not that inclined to do so bc the previous and only time I'd seen a dermatologist it was not a good experience. very condescending#also I don't like making appointments and stuff. girl I don't have time)#but I decided to be an adult and go (my insurance info seemed to imply I could go with zero copay even)#spoilers: that was not the case#anyway so I show up and surprise surprise: it sucked#she was dismissive and condescending imo. was literally like 'well it could be A B or C but I can't tell'#'all of those are basically impossible to get rid of anyway but the things to try are X Y or Z'#I asked to try Z since X and Y are things that I already tried and did nothing (which I had told her!!!)#but she just kept being like 'you just need to stop picking at it. that's the real problem and that's what's exacerbating your scarring'#(wow thanks never thought of that!) (she also insinuated that my scarring was ugly)#girl I'm not 5 years old I understand.#unfortunately for me that is a compulsion so strong it would probably take years of directed therapy to get me to stop doing that#what I'm here to see you about is to figure out what the problem is and how to stop it from happening in the first place#and STOP TRYING TO MAKE IT A COSMETIC ISSUE#it's causing me pain and discomfort that's the main problem! I would like that to stop!! and me not touching it would not solve that proble#also I wanted to ask her about something else but they were too quick about it. felt very Handled if you know what I mean#but anyway#she gave me a prescription for topical antibiotic which was the thing I had not tried#apparently my insurance doesn't cover it and it's also made of gold and plutonium or something#so she gave me a coupon for it#but get this#when I went to pick it up at the pharmacy they didn't take the coupon#the guy said. 'um this only works for the generic brand. and we don't have the generic brand'
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cephalofrog · 4 months ago
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so. the greater will huh
the real elden ring experience is hours-long journeys of attempting to create a giant overarching lore theory just so that you have an answer to questions like "so what's with those extra snakes messmer summons anyway"
I think that the DLC pretty much confirms there is a clear distinction between what the greater will wants and what the golden order believes in - those two things aren't necessarily the same, and how much they align is impossible to determine. if you assume that the GW has abandoned metyr, and therefore the fingers, ever since the beginning, that implies that a huge chunk of the beliefs of the GO are just metyr communicating to marika what she thinks her absent parent would actually want.
I don't think we'll ever have a 100% solid answer on which parts of the GO's guiding principles are metyr and which are marika, but frankly I think that's more fun to be left up to interpretation. like we can guess omens being shunned is pretty much 100% marika but something like confining destined death? maybe that's metyr taking a shot in the dark? unfortunate that it probably required marika to fight her own kid (melina lore mentioned oaauauhgh) if that's the case huh?
another interesting thing is what the GW's abandonment of its most direct children - the elden beast and metyr - says about the GW itself. the principles of the GW and the GO are vaguely aligned around the concept of "order", but I personally interpret the who GW abandoning the entire lands between thing as meaning that whatever the GW wants, it's either so incomprehensible or so unreasonable that even with direct contact to the GW metyr and the elden beast were still just left grasping at straws until it gave up and abandoned them, leaving them just trying whatever they can think of that might bring it back. marika's "betrayal" of the GW, her shattering of the elden ring, is met by the elden beast imprisoning her in the erdtree - maybe it thinks if it shows a suitable willingness to punish this god who dares defy its parent it'll stop being left on read?
this game really is just shitty parents all the way down.
anyway I guess that's what I believe about why marika shattered the elden ring. she found out that it was, from the start, based upon a lie - the greater will had no part in it, so why not shatter it, allowing her to rebuild it however she could want? (maybe that would allow her to bring back godwyn, or else grant him a true death?) unfortunately for her, the answer to that question turned out to be "because there's a giant space worm that will imprison and torment you if you do that".
also I initially started this train of thought after noticing ymir mentions humans? sentient lifeforms? as also being children of the GW ("we, too, are children of the greater will") but there's not much to say about that - they were abandoned along with the rest of its children, and ymir's plan is basically just entirely based on this, with him getting you to kill/get rid of metyr in hopes that this would make the GW notice him as a new favourite child and give him the powers to become the new mother of fingers. seems it doesn't work.
(as for messmer's snakes, due to the GW being mentioned to involve a "lightless abyss", I interpret them as being like... formed from the inverse of the GW itself (similarly to the scadutree being the inverse of the erdtree) and originating from the same abyss where it resides, meaning that they're technically on the same level as the elden beast and metyr in terms of direct connection to the GW but don't really seem to care much about it, aside from eiglay who I interpret as being an abyssal serpent who somehow left the abyss and so I guess became a regular serpent. messmer himself is both human and also an abyssal serpent, with his body able to serve as a conduit to that abyss once the seal is removed, allowing both himself (as an abyssal serpent) and other abyssal serpents through.)
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o-uncle-newt · 1 year ago
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Cabin Pressure Advent Day 18: Rotterdam
This is one of those episodes that I don't listen to much, and now that I have I'm really not sure why because it's so, so funny.
For a bunch of the other write-ups I've done, I've generally sidelined the humor- in a "well obviously this is funny, let's talk about some other thing about it instead" kind of way. And I'm going to talk about other kinds of things related to this episode, but I do want to start with how hilarious it is because it's basically perfect from that perspective. All four of the main cast are at the top of their game, and if anything having Martin and Douglas be confronted by their potential replacements only accentuates even more what makes them awesome, and their actors so good at playing them as extremely distinctive characters. All of the jokes about movie-making and airplane safety demos are super funny, and for an episode with a relatively straightforward and uncomplicated plot, the humor and the set pieces need to be top notch and thankfully they are.
This is also the kind of episode that relies on the visual humor that comes from making audio comedy- everything relies on us imagining what the characters are describing/inferring, which a) makes the writing and performing of the dialogue so important and b) allows us that moment of putting pieces together that makes things just a little bit funnier. The comparative descriptions of Carolyn and Douglas in the life jackets, and which fruit they can be compared to, are hilarious not only because it shows us Douglas being punished for making fun of Carolyn when she did the video, but because by doing it via audio they force us to imagine Douglas as looking far worse than Carolyn, which would be potentially doable but a lot less foolproof in a visual scene.
And speaking of Douglas... I always get some schadenfreude from seeing Douglas suffer, if only because he doesn't seem to very much. But I wonder if I'd have the same feeling about it if I'd listened in broadcast order rather than alphabetical, because in broadcast order Rotterdam came right after Ottery St Mary, another Douglas-suffers episode. As it is now, I feel like he's getting a bit more of what's coming to him but in a relatively balanced way (he did, after all, just flatten Martin in Qik and Paris)- I'm curious about people's impressions of these two episodes sequentially.
(It makes me wonder about some other plotlines this season, as well; listening to this right after Qik made Martin's grasping for whatever dignity he can get out of his rank feel a bit more urgent, and even though he didn't get any at the end, his general emotional victory this episode is very satisfying as a bit of a post-Qik followup, and a nice foreshadower that Martin's fortunes will start to turn next season. In the broadcasted season, the episodes are very far apart. And I also think that this episode being so long after Ottery St Mary, with that episode being right after Newcastle all the way at the beginning of the season, made Herc and his role here feel a bit more lived-in than I'd imagine it would feel to have Newcastle, Ottery St Mary, and Rotterdam right in a row. But I'm curious about people's opinions!)
The other thing that occurred to me in the context of previous episodes this season is- I'm kind of sad that JF got rid of the cold opens. Those were always really fun in S1-2. Ah well.
Anyway, a really great episode that I've apparently been SIGNIFICANTLY underrating... that is definitely heading right back into my usual rotation! Tomorrow, of course, an episode that is impossible to underrate, my favorite one of all...
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ethanhuntfemmefatale · 6 months ago
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i just wanted to say that i am a huge fan of dick (your oc not the appendage -_-) from what i've seen in his tag he just fascinates me. your mind is magnificent etc etc..
I cannot thank you enough for saying this. He says hi
:-) <-thats him
he's my player character for a ttrpg im doing...his name is dick wayne, erectile dysfunction joke partially intended (he's trans!) & also batman reference intended. he's basically a play on the stereotype of the dumb brute, I made him to play with a lot of ideas about vigilantism and violence in the family that are woven throughout the rpg. He's become a bit murky and complicated as a character because I use him so much as an outlet. The core concept of him is as a powerful guy who treats his body like a tool that he hands over to someone else to use however they see fit. He ran away from his mom as a kid but he never was able to get away from the ideas she taught him...when he was fresh out of (dropping out of) college he fell in with an older man who stoked his anger issues and taught him to fight crime. They took in a kid together! And in the end he wasn't able to stop the man from teaching those same ideas to their kid, passing the violence on.
A LOT has happened in the rpg at this point, he's almost died about 20 times, he's got like one and a half boyfriends and the one boyfriend has another version of himself who's pretty hot, etc. Now he's at a crossroads and he's trying to get better for the wrong reasons. Trying to rid himself of violence so he doesn't "infect" anyone else with it, not because he wants to get better. He's struggling with the growing horror of realizing that he has power over his own life, which means that everything that's happened because of his passivity is on his shoulders. And things are about to get worse! He's gonna die and get resurrected, for the SECOND TIME, and come back as a shambling zombie who's also kinda fey, still very powerful in all the wrong ways.
My concept is that he'll ultimately learn how to give up the one thing that he believes makes him useful and loved--his ability to fight for & protect people--in order to have a shot at real peace and contentment. before he died the second time (a really great phrase) he was a mechanic! it was the only thing he had that was his, that brought him satisfaction even through everything. he's constantly commenting on people's cars in the rpg, which is partially my own way of living out my car guy fantasies. and he has a car that's his best friend (named daisy.) I have this idea that after he gets resurrected, he'll have lost all the knowledge he had about cars, all the muscle memory, everything from this one skill that kept him tethered to the world and grounded in his own body and humanity. And at the end of the story, he'll slowly start to teach himself those skills again. Because it's not about competence, it's about the love of the work, and the love is still there! It's basically the idea of--there's no going back or undoing what's been done to you, or what you've done to yourself. the conventional happy ending (the world is saved, the status quo is restored, hurts are mended) is essentially impossible after horrible trauma. Things have changed, there are still scars, you're still older and you're still in the life all that stuff happened in. But taking the step to take care of yourself despite all that is better than a happy ending--it's meeting your life where it's at, looking at it honestly and making a commitment to it.
forgive me for being sappy i just am very invested in this. Dick is important to me at all times but especially right now cause I'm trying to use him as inspiration to deal with my own struggle to . well. give up the one thing I believe makes me useful and loved in order to have a shot at real peace and contentment.
anyway. dick wayne! he's a bear! he's a slut! he's even aro!
i love you thank you for the ask. hope you're doing great<33
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kendrixtermina · 1 year ago
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De-Rationalization & De-Politization of Palestinian Resistance
Notice how in mainstream media you almost never hear WHY the resistance attack happened. You just hear generic stuff about how they're "muslim extremists" or "want to kill all jews", but never their own stated reasons & demands.
Now you might think that the palestinian resistance went too far in their Methods - certainly, several hundred innocents were killed & while they made an effort not to make it harder than necessary on the hostages, being kidnapped is traumatizing by itself - the leaked convos with Netanyahu show that some captives definitely suffered..
But their basic demands as stated by themselves (that you are never told about by much of the media) are:
stop occupying us
release mistreated prisoners held on spurious charges
don't heckle people who want to pray in Al-Aqsa (this being what started this "round" of fighting)
This is all stuff that Israel should do ANYWAY. These are all things human rights orgs and/or the UN have been calling for for YEARS.
And seeing as nothing happened despite human rights orgs complaining, is it so strange ppl decided to take it in their own hands? Especially after we've seen how little political will there is to use any leverage to restrain Israel.
I believe strongly that you can only judge individuals by what they can influence, so I will not ever call the death or kidnapping of random israeli civilians 'glorious' or 'deserved' or indulge in 'nobody is innocent' talk cause that's a convevient simplification to get rid of cognitive dissonance. War is always ugly, innocents always get caught up, that's why it should only be the last resort.
However, he who makes peaceful reform impossible makes violent uprising inevitable. It's not a question of moralizing, it's cause & effect, human nature. You may drive out nature with the pitchfork but it always stubbornly returns. Humans don't like to be slaves. No amount of moralizing or repression will change this.
So when I see how the media isn't telling us why they are doing this & instead telling us that they're just irrational extremists or pointing to some long disavowed document from the 80s when they were first founded & more extreme, I see how denying the opponent's rationality obscures a correct understanding of the situation.
The deaths of Israeli civilians shouldn't have happened. But how could they realistically have been prevented? If you don't see Palestinians as rational, and think they're just killing for killing's sake, you may think the answer is more repression.
But if you acknowledge the other side's rationality, you realize that violence is dangerous to the one doing it as well. Aside from hardcore ideologues, most people would not choose violence if they had other options.
But Israel has systematically cut those off: Peaceful protesters are shot, activists get arrested, strikes & boycotts are met with slander & lawfare, diplomacy is met with intransigence...
If you see Palestinians as having reason & not being any more likely to use violence than anyone else, the blame is obviously with those who cut off all peaceful means! (and besides did a piss poor job guarding their own citizens, pulling the army to the west bank & shooting at their own ppl)
There is this saying in my country that when someone's being sanctimonious they have "rented morality for themselves" (leaving only immorality for the opponent) but what we're seeing here, much more, is ppl acting like they rented rationality for themselves.
Hence all this propaganda to portray them as an irrational horse doing gratuitous mass rape/executions instead of a competent army that, while not perfect, looks way more disciplined & sophisticated than the Israelis RN.
And of course, if they "just hate us cause they hate us", that makes it easier to justify draconic measures because there is no cause that be fixed.
Because they're scared that if ppl heard their reasoning & demands, they would maybe agree with their goals if not their methods.
Notice also that it's the same de-rationalizing as you would see with an abuser: The girlfriend just bitches cause she's a bitch, the children just contradict cause they want to contradict... not because their feelings are hurt because of abuse.
I think thinking & reason are just as fundamental to humanity as feeling & sensitivity, & that to portray them as unthinking is just as awful as to deny ppl's suffering or humanity in an emotional sense.
And yes, there's an obvious parallel to how post 9/11 they stressed the attackers' religion (encouraging persecution of muslims worlwide) to detract from their political goals. They were angry about american meddling in the cold war. Again this isn't justifying their deeds, this is just cause & effect. But then what did they do? Yet more meddling & destabilizing. The most counterproductive possible thing. & in the end they got Bin Laden with spy cameras and a swat team. The war did nothing to catch him. He wasn't even in Afghanistan.
Like even if we grant for argument's sake that Hamas are unambiguous baddies, you would, idk, get the USA to use leverage to make Qatar extradite their leaders and put them on trial, or catch them with police, not mass murder civilians.
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sunnywalnut · 8 months ago
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For my tboys(and anyone else) that want to try transtape but are in way over your heads:
-get waterproof muscle tape instead. It's basically the same thing but cheaper. And you can get it in bulk on the Big Daddy Bezos Website
-depending on the size of your chest, you'll need enough to cover it and then add an extra two inches or so. The extra length is so that you don't have too much tension
-round out the corners of your tape with scissors. It's okay if it isn't perfect. All you really need is to make sure there isn't any sharp edges that are going to lift when you shower/move
-rid your skin of all oils before applying tape. You can do soap and water and wait for it to dry completely, or just wipe yourself down with rubbing alcohol. I usually do rubbing alcohol. It's faster.
-if you stretch the tape too far, it can and will rip your skin. This usually starts as your skin feeling tight or itchy. This is because your skin is stretching too far. Take the tape off. Try again. Less tension this time.
-you want around 25% of the tape to not be stretched at all. This is your anchor point. Usually somewhere underneath your armpit.
-for the love of the universe, PLEASE cover your nipples. A thin piece of gauze, bandaids, whatever. Just cover them. They're sensitive as fuck and if you get tape on them, you could possibly rip them off, rip out the hair surrounding them, or just have a really uncomfortable time. Trust me. It's not fun. Keep those bad boys safe.
-transtape/muscle tape is generally hypoallergenic, however make sure you look into it anyways. If they don't tell you what's in it, run the other way. Chemical rash is no fucking joke and makes it IMPOSSIBLE to wear your binder afterwards.
-while you can apply tape standing up(and most do) you can also apply it laying down on your back. Some people say this is for people with larger chests bc gravity or whatever, but honestly. I say anyone should do it. Less unneeded tension added, and also you don't have to angle yourself all weird just to work against gravity. Plus this is a win for those of us with back pain. Easier, faster, and much more comfortable. Wins all around.
-you can get muscle tape that is up to 4 inches wide. However. I find the regular 2 inches is fine for me. Just make sure you don't overlap the tape too much. More chance of peeling that way.
-IF YOU SHOWER WITH YOUR TAPE ON, MAKE SURE IT'S JUST WARM. I CANNOT stress this enough. Just because it's WATER proof does not mean it is HEAT proof. And also rubbing on top of the tape is not good. Instead, wash the skin around the tape and try not to rub at the edges. You can always clean the skin underneath after you take the tape off.
-try not to wear tape for longer than 2-3 days and shower/clean thoroughly afterwards. Bacteria still grows underneath, even though it is covered. Pat dry. Your skin may be sensitive from being under glue. That's normal.
-THINGS TO LOOK OUT FOR: extremely itchy skin on application site. Redness. Swelling. Tiny "pinpricks" of red(this is your skin beginning to tear). Open sores. Skin breaking open when scratched lightly(again. Tearing). While these all may LOOK like symptoms of an allergic reaction, don't freak out!! You likely just have your tape on too tight. Take it off and give your body time to heal. DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT put body tape over open wounds. It is VERY POSSIBLE that it can cause tearing, infections, and other not very good side effects. And please. If your skin itches or starts to tear, remove the tape. I still have scars from when I ignored mine, thinking it was just normal. And that was on my hands.
Sources:
And personal trial and error^^
Be safe!!
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thessalian · 10 months ago
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Thess vs Upcoming Elections
Both the US and the UK are coming up on elections this year, and the usual notifications are coming up - hell, I've posted them myself - about how people are going to try to convince you that there's no point in voting because both parties are the same, and that it's a psyop by the Republicans / Conservatives, etc. And in the US, that's probably true. But I did want to say something about the whole deal in the UK, because I actually live here, and there's one problem with that theory.
That theory doesn't hold true when we're hearing it directly from the Leader of the Opposition.
Those of us in the UK have heard Kier Starmer saying, time and again, how he will fall into lockstep with the Tories on so many issues. He's spoken in support of teachers outing transgender kids to their parents. He's refusing to condemn the genocide in Gaza. He's going to continue to 'bolster the NHS with private contracts', which basically means stealth privatisation of the service and already cost us billions during the early days of COVID. Just about every nasty policy the Tories have put out there the last few years, Starmer has more or less agreed with. I'm not sure where he stands about this stupid Rwanda thing, but he is a lawyer so I'm pretty sure that at the very least he's wary of breaking international law.
The worst part is that it feels like we're damned either way. If we don't vote Starmer, our not-two-party-system-BUT is arranged in such a way that the Tories will probably win again. This will bolster the far right element and things will get worse for us. However, if we do vote Labour ... well, Starmer's going to go on about "See, that's how you win an election" and carry on with his Tory-With-A-Red-Tie mentality, and the Tories will go, "Well, obviously we need to go further right to win the next one", and get absolutely fucking feral about it. And the Tories probably will win next time because the absolute mess the Tories have made of the economy and everything else is impossible to fix in five years, and everyone will blame Labour for it because they have the mental capacity of goldfish.
I mean, I'm going to vote Labour anyway. My borough is one of the safest of safe Labour seats, but I'm going to do it anyway. People keep saying, "Vote Green!" but ... I'm sorry, no matter how important that one issue is, I will not vote for a one-issue party. The Lib Dems have become basically wallpaper at this point, and there aren't a lot of other political entities in my borough. I mean, the absolute best we could do by voting third-party is to force a hung Parliament, but I mistrust that kind of thing ever since the Conservative / Lib Dem coalition in 2010, which was the start of this whole mess.
Anyway, I'm going to vote Labour even though I know what they are and what they're doing because I cannot imagine aiding and abetting the Tories at this point. I can hope that Starmer, who has been very cagey about his manifesto to stop the Tories from spending time during Prime Minister's Questions trying to use it as ammunition against having to actually answer the man's questions, is further to the left than he appears. Then again, we live in a capitalist hellscape and I would guess not? But at least he doesn't want to send refugees to Rwanda. Maybe. Maybe he'll actually respect international law. And maybe he'll even get rid of the idiotic voter ID laws which Jacob Rees-Mogg admitted was deliberate gerrymandering on live television and no one batted a fucking eye. In fact, Rees-Mogg said, "We just have to do it more effectively" and then there were even more draconian laws put into place around postal votes, and again, no one seemed to care.
It's sad when all the hope we can cling to in these cases is "Maybe the other guy won't be a literal criminal" ... but I guess the US knows that one too.
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emerson-grimes-apologist · 1 year ago
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Some notes on species
I can and will create long-ass documents with more details later, but I just wanted to put together a little something for now. Also, this will explain and clear up stuff related to my interpretations of the characters who are part of these species.
SIRENS
Sirens are born when people die at sea, particularly those who have been treated unjustly by sailors.
I should explain some lore stuff. The Ocean (personified) doesn’t like sailors that much. She tolerates them once they acknowledge that they’re sailing all over her property and are respectful about it, but the cocky, “Yar har, I’m the master of the sea!!” types of people she doesn’t like at all.
So she takes pity on people who suffered at the hands of sailors (they have a common enemy) and adopts them as one of her own (brings them back to life as sea creatures). And she gives them the power to enact revenge on sailors (their voice powers).
When I say “people who have been treated unjustly by sailors,” I’m talking about, like, mistreated staff (boatswains, cooks, servants, etc.), prisoners of war, stowaways thrown overboard after they were discovered, women drowned because of the belief that a woman on board a ship is bad luck, etc.
Most sirens are female (the Ocean is female herself and feels camaraderie with other women), but it's not impossible for men and nonbinary people to become sirens.
Sirens don’t remember their lives as humans after they turn into sirens.
FEATURES: webbed hands; claws; shark-like teeth; big unblinking fish eyes, long, flipper-like feet; dermal denticles (shark skin); gills on ribs; bluish-green skin
Their power is basically that people are suggestible to whatever they say. For example, if they tell someone to go to sleep, they will feel sleepy. Etc.
They have beautiful singing voices that sound kind of like whalesong. They use it for sonar to locate ships as well as other sirens. I don't think their singing has magic properties, but sometimes sailors are drawn to it anyway (if they are stupid. Smart sailors turn around and get out of there if they hear it).
Sirens don’t have a structured society (they are like nomads and sleep in whatever caves and crevices they find) but are tightly knit and look out for each other. They sometimes hunt in packs.
Their diet mostly consists of human flesh, but they also eat fish.
I’ve read recently that in Greek mythology, sirens didn’t lure sailors by seducing them, but instead offered to reveal hidden knowledge to them, and I think that’s neat. For like, sirens to know mysteries and secrets as a way to symbolize the ocean and uncharted waters being full of mysteries and secrets. I’m not sure if and how I’d incorporate this, though. (Also I’m so pissed at medieval writers for getting rid of all of the sirens' cool traits and reducing them to just being sexual and nothing else.)
DOLL PEOPLE
I created this species for Heartfelt and Mort to explain the facts that A, Heartfelt can stick giant needles in his body like it’s no big deal, and B, Mort has button eyes despite being from the novels and not the show, and therefore isn’t portrayed by a puppet (meaning that that’s how he actually looks in-universe).
(I know it’s awkward and possibly confusing for Candle Cove—the show where almost every character is portrayed by puppets or dolls despite being human in-universe—to have characters who are actually meant to be dolls in-universe. But whatever. I mostly only think about the universe of Candle Cove and not the meta elements. The fact that this whole thing is supposed to be a puppet show rarely crosses my mind. Maybe it isn't relevant at all in my AU?)
Doll people came into existence when life magic-users used their magic to bring their children’s dolls to life. Once the dolls gained sentience, they didn’t want to be just toys anymore (understandably) and joined society.
Doll people were originally the size of regular dolls (small), but as time went on, they made human-sized bodies for themselves so that they could interact with humans more easily.
The thing that gives doll people their life force are their hearts (which are not the same thing as human hearts). They’re small and red and actually shaped like hearts. Doll people’s personalities are also stored in their hearts. So a heart can be taken out of a doll person’s body and put into a new body, and they would then possess the new body. (This is how they made themselves bigger, in my above point).
They don’t feel pain, and it’s no big deal if their bodies get damaged (they can just sew themselves together again), but they could be in trouble if their hearts get damaged.
Doll people don’t have organs and therefore don’t eat or breathe or do any other body functions. They do need to sleep, though (that’s how their hearts rest and repair themselves).
Body modification (embroidery, patches, replacing whole body parts, etc.) is popular among doll people (more so than it is among humans) because of how safe and painless and cheap it is.
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veliseraptor · 2 years ago
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Headcanon: Just like Vegas and Kinn had a nicer relationship when they were younger, Gun was a nicer father when they were younger, for a given definition of "nice". Basically like their public image happy family stuff wasn't always 100% for show; maybe more like 50% - 75%. It's those memories that drive Vegas more than anything else. It would be even worse/better if Kinn as heir and Vegas taking on more "responsibility"/abuse and no more mom to mitigate Gun happened in approximately the same time period, so he fully associates his dad getting crueler and more unreasonable with Kinn as the new impossible ideal to throw himself against. Suddenly nothing he achieves is ever good enough, and that's obviously because Kinn has everything and not because Gun has become impossible to please.
ohhhhhh I'm so into this though. actually @ameliarating and I were discussing too how it is actually important to me that Gun isn't/wasn't necessarily always all the time awful, and (like you said) that's part of what makes Vegas keep trying to get his approval and love, because he knows it can be there if he just does the right thing/performs well enough/lives up to his dad's expectations. but the idea of specifically that changing, and that changing alongside, as you say:
The loss of his and Macau's mom, so he doesn't have a source of parental love other than his dad, and the associated grief there as well;
Kinn his formerly at least not enemy cousin abruptly becoming his rival and (from Vegas's perspective) "turning against" him (as Kinn embraces the doctrine of 'don't trust the minor family' and 'this is all competition that makes us stronger' in a more concerted way;
Vegas stepping more into his role as heir and therefore picking up more weight both in terms of what he's expected to do (and the associated baggage with that, including the reputation and how that fucks with what Vegas believes about himself) and the intensity of the expectations themselves (and "consequences" for failure in the form of abuse);
and...yeah, another way in which Kinn is symbolic, then, and Kinn is also in Vegas's head somehow to blame. Gun's abuse is Kinn's fault, if Kinn weren't there being Kinn then everything would be fine or at least better, and so it's a solvable problem! if he can beat Kinn, or get rid of Kinn, then his dad will love him again! obvious solution.
which of course is not. how it works. but it's a handy way for Vegas to displace any potential doubts he might have about his father and his chances of getting what he wants from his father, onto Kinn, who is a more comfortable target.
anyway, love this, kind of feel like I just ended up rephrasing a lot of what you said, taking it back to my cave to chew on
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ravenpuffheadcanons · 1 year ago
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bel rowley sewing project - 3 (house party edition)
Perhaps more than any other, the house party episode of The Hour is one filled with wonderful clothes.
I love Bel's perfect coat. It would look very silly on me, because the last thing I need is Added Volume, but if you think this has stopped me from hunting down a pattern you are dead wrong.
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The best I could find in terms of general shape is this pattern from around the same time, which I would need to redraft in my own size if I chose it.
The lapel would be easy enough to adapt. I don't know how to do the button detail on the back, but I love it, and the rest of the pattern is basically bang-on. Except the lack of pockets. But I do at least know how to add pockets to a pattern.
Bel's dress is also gorgeous. When would I wear it? Why would I need one? Am I skilled enough to make something like this out of very expensive silk? Would I look like a heffalump? Look. This is not a time for tiresome pettifogging. It's a time for wondering if the dress would work equally well in dark green.
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I couldn't get any pictures that showed the way the gathers (or pleats?) sat over the bust. It is very hard to take screenshots on a paused DVD. Anyway, it's almost impossible to find patterns for evening dresses of the era that have slim rather than full skirts - and those that do are missing either the lovely square back, or the wrap-effect bodice. I've spent more time than I would care to admit on assorted pattern websites, and I think this (black dress) is the closest I could get to the basic shape:
It's still quite far off. Get rid of the bow, obviously. Bring the straps up further onto the shoulders, and add some more fabric into the bodice that would then be pleated or gathered over the bust. I think that might get it a bit closer. But there's no picture of the back of the dress, so I've no idea what that's like at all. I think I'll need to keep hunting for this one - or leave it for the very end of the project, when I will know how to draft my own from scratch.
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erigold13261 · 2 years ago
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Dream last night
My dream last night from what I remember started off with me as some alcoholic teenager being harassed by a group of preppy assholes. We all had powers so they thought they were better than me since I never used mine and I was always drinking some alcoholic potion I made to keep me sane during school. Well I did have some kind of power where I could at least make a hoverboard and I used it and was going super fast, fast enough to reliably go on the highway.
Well the asshole kids thought I was cool after seeing my power/hoverboard and tried to befriend me but I just gave them my drinks I made or a real version of my hoverboard (not a temporary one I could make disappear at will) and moved away from them. Like they were legitimately now trying to be friends with me and I could not care less lol. 
Anyway, one day I was leaving the school/training area after the assholes tried to invite me out to hang out. I just gave them my drink and went out doing some cool tricks and being speedy. I got to the highway but I was so out of it that I didn’t even realize the crash scene or the piles of bodies littering the street for a solid minute. It looked like something out of a zombie film. 
Well I ended up getting chased by some police or something because, well I had powers and they were being dicks and wanted to pin the blame on me. I pulled over to a bridge area and got off the highway and just stood by the water while the cops tried to pin the blame on me. Well the asshole kids were following me for some reason and explained I was innocent and was just at our school/training facilities. 
I think I was let go or something, I don’t really remember. What I explained all of this for is because I think it relates to my next dream that happened! It was a combination of like Five Nights at Freddy’s and No Straight Roads. It also mixed in elements of SCP, Sly Cooper, and Legends of Zelda somehow. But I think the whole thing took place in the same initial universe of my dream where some people have powers and some don’t, while those who don’t are awful to powered people.
Anyway, what happened was Gregory (FNAF) and Yinu (NSR) were child soldiers made to work together to find out either just some standard information for a mission, or who caused the highway crash and killed all those people to set my character free.
The two kids were on like a watch tower or something, one that forest patrollers use, though we were right under the actual room. So we (Yinu and Gregory, I switch perspective a lot in my dreams) were just hanging on the beams and trying not to be seen by anyone coming up the stairs. We didn’t want to be on the roof because there was no easy way to get up there without being seen by whoever was in the watchtower.
We had to get to some secret room in another building close by. Gregory, I don’t think he had any real powers, but he did have a lot of tech. Maybe the tech was his powers I don’t know. All I knew was Freddy was our informational person and talked to the two of us as we got in position. Gregory had a cool ass belt that he was able to zipline down to the ground and other equipment that allowed him to go invisible for a bit. The last I knew of him, he was making his way to the special room.
Yinu on the other hand (the perspective I basically took over until I woke up), had a different job. She had to get rid of the people in the watchtower and disable the lights roaming the facilities to make retrieval easier later on. She actually did have powers. She could wrap her arms in plants to use as larger arms to fight or to hold on better to things while climbing. She was honestly super sneaky but was having a hard time getting into the watchtower because multiple people were going in and out of the room and using the stairs a lot. It made it almost impossible to get in to poison or paralyze the watchers without someone sending out an impromptu alarm of her presence. 
I think she ended up just fighting whatever creature was coming up the stairs as quietly as possible and then took care of the watchers in the room. She turned off the lights for that tower and sealed the room with plants to keep anyone from getting in (unless they used like fire or something which would just destroy the tower anyway). Well after that, she got to the roof of the tower and made a leaf parachute/glider thing to get to the next tower. 
Her and Gregory were doing so well in my dream and I really wish that I stayed asleep longer to see what would happen next because I ended up waking up. It was a really cool dream to transition to from the first one because usually my multiple dreams in the same night are unrelated, or are so related it’s just the same dream with me having more control over it (which is good considering usually my dreams are me getting assaulted in some way or another).
I did have an initial dream before the alcoholic school one, but that was just a continuation from the other night with a character who was like a servant that would get a shit ton of information for a dark lord and that lord threw me away to some jerks I antagonized earlier once I lost my usefulness. I was absolutely terrified (my dream self was, I in reality wasn’t, this wasn’t a nightmare) that I was going to be tortured and hurt by them but they weren’t assholes like that and looking for revenge since they could see my one safety net just tossed me to the wind.
I ended up staying with them and getting into a kind of relationship with either their beast tamer or like the knight. I forget which one, I just knew it was one of the really big and strong guys.
So yeah, that was my dream I wanted to share. Maybe I should share more if I ever have any cool dreams. I usually just write them down and don’t share, but since last night had something NSR related I wanted to share :3
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homo-house · 11 months ago
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seeing some usamerican election discourse in the tl but i don't want to interact directly with it so i will just say here as an outsider that you guys will never get anywhere near real progress before you get rid of that absolutely ridiculous two party system. i am saying this genuinely and not trying to take the piss or anything. most election systems around the world are broken but damn if the USA's isn't one of the worst. this maybe is common sense but i wanted to elaborate on why i think it is beyond repair and needs at the very least a reform or to be revolutionized
the basic premise of a state is that different sectors of society with differing or competing interests have a mediator (not necessarily a single person) and in modern societies usually the 'mediator' spot is disputed by different classes trying to elect their respective representatives, and we find this nice because we think it's nice to have the ability to be represented by someone in a position of power (the state is really centralized, articulated power). but that goes down the drain when the mechanics of the state itself make it so that certain parts of society cannot dispute for positions within the state, can't elect people who really represent them.
as it is what you have is a state that essentially is built so that only the elite can take part in it, and then there is a slight divide among that elite that they infight about and sell that fight as something everyone else should care about, while what people actually care about is not any of the things they propose. if the only two parties you can vote for want to continue going to war while the people want nothing to do with war and it is near impossible to elect someone from a different party or independent, how is that representative democracy? note that i am saying elect and not vote. the whole thing is built so that you can vote for anyone you want, but you cannot elect anyone you want - the ones who can possibly get elected and stay in office are predetermined because of how the system is built, and it has been shaped over the years so that the group of people who already in power can continue there, essentially alienating itself from society, and those who were there when this alienation begun (maybe it even begun from day one, maybe sometime later) were people with some kind of power already (that's what made it easy for them to get there in the first place)
i think this segment of david harvey's (bear with me i know not everyone likes him) "the marxian theory of the state" puts it best:
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(his sources are all in full in the linked file, it's free to access)
the state is a machine, a huge, well articulated, valuable instrument capable of making life better or of destroying it. maybe it was built with good intention, so that people could elect the ones who control the machine, but over the years, the people who got inside installed mechanisms inside the control room so that it is literally gatekept, locked with a heavy mechanical steel door which only opens from the inside, and since that was done, no one has been able to make burst through yet.
the way i see it, there are only three ways to get the machine to stop killing and be used for good: 1. destroy the machine and build it anew (difficult, and you will lose almost all it currently offers); 2. use brute force and burst through the door (you need absurd amounts of force to do that) 3. find a way to disable the mechanism holding the door closed and get fucking rid of it (essentially, hijacking, which requires a very good plan- and someone who manages to access it)
anyways thanks if you read this all the way. i know it's kinda weird for me as a brazilian to be talking about this but as a geography major and the nosiest person alive i have a lot of Thoughts and my friends are tired of me rambling already
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cerebraldischarge · 1 year ago
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Random Thursday morning realizations.
- Government is an abusive spouse. You can literally break yourself for it's sake, and it'll deny that your injuries are a result of its treatment of you. Also, if you use government to bully people, it WILL be used against you the same way. No matter who you hate: gay people, rich people, disabled people, white people, etc. - when vindictive legislation is made against a group, that enables further vindictive legislation to be made against the next group. Anything that extends government power diminishes YOU.
- Knowing that I'll be dead soon has enabled me to allow myself some character flaws, human weaknesses (like some extra weight and shitty math/navigational skills) without feeling crippling guilt over them or burning myself out trying to improve (which doesn't really get rid of the guilt anyway, just adds anxiety to it). This is truly an act of self-compassion and the people who are the loudest about needing self-compassion will turn around and literally be like "no, not like that". Bass ackwards.
- Depression is a luxury. That's why mostly teenagers do it - us old bastards have responsibilities, so we have to get out of bed and do things no matter what we feel like. Indulge while you can.
- It's not good for you (in the long term) to be the "token civvie/reject friend" in a friend group, but these are often the most caring, reflective, and just all 'round moral people who basically adopt those they look up to. So, um, maybe be kind to them, if you have one.
- You can't convince someone to love you, or accept you. This isn't sales, and you aren't a product. Stop wasting time trying to talk trash into becoming treasure.
- Safe spaces are the result of good people being willing to do violent things, not the result of magically removing violence from human nature (which is an impossible task).
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worworwol · 2 years ago
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How do I look away now that I have seen you?
RACHEL MENNIES, from “April 18, 2017” - The Naomi Letters
01.02.2023
Hello, I am back sooner than the previous updates not like I promised to but like I wanted to. My period is over, so I am more emotionally stable but I am not at my “normal” per se. My normal is not like another person’s normal, I think everyone’s “normal” is special to them to be honest, my normal is when I am not plagued with thoughts of killing myself every second of the day, getting out of bed and socializing doesn’t require too much effort, and I feel stable, not happy, not sad, basically feeling nothing all the time. It is not like numbness either, it is indifference. I spent most of my life like this so far, at least when I am not in a depressive episode, so it became my normal. Isn’t that what normal is anyways, the majority of something? Anyway, I am stuck in this awful state between depression and “normal”. I don’t think of killing myself all the time, but it still haunts me like a predator after its prey, I feel sad and lonely not to the extent when it is when I am in an episode but it’s still there, I feel numb but I also feel too much. It is awful, I hate being like this. I would say I hate the person I am, but I am not sure if I am even a person. I more like a shadow, a reflection; it is there but it is not the original, it would be nothing without the original, just seizing to exist. Even the language I use to describe my thoughts is not my original language, that’s how made up I am. It is also a way to distance myself from what I feel and think, essentially disassociating. Or it is not, and I just see my actions as so important that I psychoanalyze everything because I have narcissistic tendencies.
Last time I extensively talked about my crush so it is only fair to give updates. To cut it short one of my friends talked to him in private and asked if he is interested in anyone or think anyone is interested in him. I don’t know what he specifically said, I don’t even know what my friend asked precisely but the friend said that he is getting over his crush and not really ready to be in a relationship yet. You might say this is not the end of this, that’s what my friends said as well. That this is a good opportunity for us to spend more time with each other and get to know each other better. That maybe he will fall for me in time and get over his crush while. And a rational or confident person would agree but I am neither of those things. He is clearly not over this crush so he won’t be able to feel anything for me. Even if he does feel something, who is to say that I am not just a distraction or replacement? I didn’t think he would feel something for me in the first place because I am not lovable but I still hoped and yearned for it knowing it was a low possibility. Now I can’t even hope because it is basically impossible. It would be best for me and for our friend group if I just got over it but how do I look away now that I’ve seen the beauty and the potential he has? How can I just bury everything I feel and move on as if nothing happened, at least for me? When I see something, a potential, a sparkle, something, I obsess over it because I don’t know how to survive otherwise if I don’t have the motivation to go after something or someone, to pursue. Maybe what I am feeling is not even love or like, but a kind of obsession. But that realization doesn’t change the fact that I don’t know how to get rid of it. I feel so hopeless and drained, so void of any kind of wisdom or control. So pathetic and stupid.
Other than that my break is going busy but good. I am hanging out with my friends and family. Even though the family part is mostly draining than anything there being no school and my friends make it bearable. I got my wisdom teeth removed today so that sucks but you gotta do what you gotta do. I don’t have any ache but it hurts even when I swallow. I’ll be fine in a few days. Today is also the first day of February! I can’t believe one twelfth of the year is gone already. Not like I expect anything from this year, I’ve quit doing that a long time ago. It’s just that the fact that time is relative to everyone even though it’s a measured quantity always amazed me. Physics is really fun when it comes to these kinds of subjects, but only then. I hate it with a passion other times. I think this is it for this post. Thank you for reading if anyone is reading to it. I’ll see you in the next post!
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ikam177 · 2 years ago
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Ok listen I gotta talk about it but it's a bit of a weird AU so I'm not sure it'll be coherent, please bear with me hear.
The premise is this : Earth is covered in a toxic miasma that slowly kills people who breathe it, so everyone wears filtering masks when they go outside, and generally live either underground or in high-security buildings with no windows (can't risk the miasma getting in). But even with all those precautions, the gas can't be avoided completely, so people still die before they reach 40.
Since humanity is in a bit of a crisis, everyone lives in Settlements (capital S) run by the government. Kids grow up in the highest security buildings until they naturally develop an Ability (capital A, basically just classpect powers) at around 20, where they'll finally be considered adults. Depending on their Ability, they'll be sent to other Settlements and assigned jobs based on them. It's a highly-efficient but also merciless society, and not everyone is happy with it.
Add to that regular attacks by trolls (oh yeah, they're here too, btw) on important Settlements, and it's not a very fun world to live in, but people make do.
Dirk just turned 20, along with Roxy, and they both manifested their Abilities. Roxy is to be sent to another Settlement, because her ability to create things out of nothing is very valuable, but Dirk doesn't want their family to be separated and fights against it. She's sent there anyway, and Dirk is assigned the task of going on an exploratory mission to try and find a way to go to other continents by sea. But electromagnetic storms are all over the ocean, and Dirk knows it's just a convenient suicide mission to get rid of any problematic members of society.
As expected, the boat is caught in a storm, and Dirk ends up on an island, unconscious, hurt, and with no mask. The island turns out to be Jake and Jade's, and is surrounded on all sides by electromagnetic fields that actually keep the toxic gas out, so it's the only place on earth with a normal atmosphere, though signals are jammed and leaving is nigh impossible. The reason Dirk managed to land there was because Feferi, who lives in caves under the island with Eridan and knows the perfect route between the storms, brought him there. Jake then found him on the shore and nursed him back to health along with Grandma and Jade.
Oh, and cloning is a thing, and very common. Dirk is a clone of Beta Bro, Jake is a clone of Grandpa, Grandma is a clone of Jade (yes, in that order, there's a reason for it), etc etc.
The DirkJake will probably be slowburn, and most of the fic will be gen with a dose of "will-they-won't-they" thrown in for flavor.
(Also I'm making Dirk, Roxy, and the Jades trans and nobody can stop me)
There's a lot more going on to this AU but I'd like to at least keep some of it a secret so I don't spoil everything once I write the actual fic, but that's the gist of it (I say as if I didn't just dump multiple paragraphs on y'all). :')
I have yet another DirkJake AU idea, someone stop me.
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shatteredeternity · 2 years ago
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[i know this may not make sense, but i'd still like to share it since i thought it sounded cool]
cw // yandere themes, implied sexual intercourse, unfaithfulness, manipulation, minors dni
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YANDERE GENSHIN IMPACT 'SOULMATE' AU wherein 'soulmates' (which was basically two or more people assigned to be together) were established by celestia for convenience (i'm not quite sure how it's convenient yet, though) and was viewed as one of the most important things in society ever since it was initiated. however, there were some cases, some rare cases where someone ended up having the misfortune to not get assigned one. perhaps it was fate, a punishment, a mistake, even. (but no one dared to say that aloud without getting a dirty look from the people who heard them say such a thing)
unfortunately, you were one of the rare cases. you have no one on the other end of your red string, no timer counting down to when you finally meet your significant other, no ink appearing on your arm stating what your significant other was thinking. because of this, you were pitied. always hearing the words 'i'm sorry for that', 'i'm sorry to hear that' upon first meeting.
'they're just stupid.' 'soulmates are useless, anyway!' you'd try telling yourself, attempting to distract from the shitty feeling that resulted every time those words were uttered to you. though, as much as you hated them, you couldn't really blame them, could you? after all, the idea of soulmates was planted in a child's mind as soon as they could do so much as speak. it was an ugly unbreakable cycle that repeated itself from generation to generation. but as said... you really couldn't blame someone for something they were taught to think, right..?
eventually, their words got to you. the want and need for a soulmate festering from the desperation of wanting to be viewed as pathetic anymore, and what could be described as the feeling of an empty void blooming in your chest. you started to crave romance. you craved intimacy. you craved to be held the way lovers do. you craved to be looked at the way lovers do. you craved to be touched the way lovers do.
it became too much for you. the thoughts, the wants, the needs-- it was overwhelming. you needed it and you were getting tired of sitting in a corner with your thoughts and you needed the very thing you were deprived of. it was impossible, but your thoughts were eating away at your very being like an invasive species. if you couldn't get what you wanted, you could always seek for the closest thing to it.
intimacy and the touch of another. not the one lovers shared-- god, you wish. sex and the act of alluring others, to put it simply. you knew it was wrong, but push came to shove, and you had to think for yourself. and hey, if anyone else were in your position, they'd do the same, right? plus, there are plenty of people unsatisfied with the person they were tied to be with; harboring intent similar to yours (but not really, at the same time). you'd only be doing a favor for both parties, right?
you do end up getting what you want, ultimately. waking up in unfamiliar beds, going on dates, etc. it wasn't the real deal, but hey, beggars can't be choosers. though, the more you went on with this, infamy soon followed. it was... to be expected, to say the least, but it didn't stop you. even before all this, you were already an outcast, and all it did was change the looks people gave you from pity and feigned empathy to disgust and revolt.
however, after getting in bed and drawing in the wrong crowd, you soon get a taste of what you sought for. love. but...something didn't feel right about it. it felt suffocating-- like you were an addiction one could not rid oneself of no matter how hard they tried.
to say you were uneased was an understatement. you felt cramped, trapped, as though you were a bird in a cage, desolate as you tried looking for a way out.
but, you did want this, right? you craved this kind of affection you thought was out of your reach, and now, you finally achieved what you had originally thought was impossible, so why did it feel so wrong? maybe it was because you weren't used to it, surely, you'll come to your senses eventually. all you should do now is to bite back your tears and endure it, since everything good has a catch, doesn't it?
yet, why is it that you feel so close, yet so far to what you wanted?
a/n - first post on tumblr, yay!!! i heavily apologize if this isn't that good, i just wanted to write about this since it's been plaguing my mind for a week now aha. (not proofread btw)
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