#''but how can Angel be touch starved with the job he has?'' well it's not about the Quantity of the touch but the Quality you see---

[wispurring-moss]

no thoughts just These TwoTM touch-starved losers gradually evolving into the epitome of casual touching/cuddling for absolutely no reason and they probably don't even realize they're doing it lol <'3

[elixrr]

ᴄᴜᴅᴅʟᴇ ɴɪɢʜᴛꜱ! ☆ ʜᴏʏᴏᴠᴇʀꜱᴇ ᴍᴇɴ¡

ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜꜱᴇ ᴏꜰ ʏᴏᴜ, ɪ ʙᴇʟɪᴇᴠᴇ ɪɴ ʟᴏᴠᴇ.

ꜰᴛ: Xiao, Wriothesley, Lyney, Dan Heng, Argenti, Blade.

ꜱʏɴᴘᴏꜱɪꜱ: Headcanons about their cuddles with you!

ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀꜱ ɴᴏᴛᴇ: I considered adding Alhaitham into the mix, but I figured that I didn't know his character well enough for his part to be accurate and good. Apologies to all of the Alhaitham fans! Also, new format for my fanfiction posts, inspired by many creators! (Namely iheartganyu)

ᴘꜱ: pretty little spoiler warning if you haven't caught up with anything in either game 😭😭

✰ xiao ✰

— An adeptus of Liyue, the Vigilant Yaksha. It's easy to guess that cuddles with him are rare. Mostly due to his job, but he's too... awkward. Xiao has been touch-starved for the great majority of his life, so it's easy to assume that he's inexperienced, much to his dismay.

Don't get me wrong. He'd love to cuddle more often, but— while inexperience is one part of it, Xiao is ultimately insecure. He strongly believes that he's tainted. He believes that he's a disgusting, vile creature that lives only to slaughter, but he thinks of you as an angel. Xiao thinks that too many cuddles would taint you, alongside the fact that he worries about his Karmic Debt situation.

Nevertheless, when you do convince him to cuddle with you, he'll be awkward at first; hesitant to put his arm here, overthinking how he put his hand there, etc., etc. He doesn't emit much body warmth, but he finds you to be really cozy and warm to the touch, thus finding comfort in the closeness once he moves past the insecurities and hesitation. By the way, unless you like to initiate and contribute to conversations, most of the cuddles will be in comfortable silence, excluding the occasional comment about the scenery or compliments about each other.

Xiao would cuddle on the condition that it's in a secluded area and nobody else is present except for you and him. He'd prefer to book a bedroom at Wangshu Inn, but if not, then he'd prefer to cuddle on the rooftop of the inn, late at night when the stars shine from the heaven-blessed galaxies, the subtle natural light kissing your features to give him a little bit of an extra view. He doesn't think too much about how he looks to you, but he could only hope that he's at least bearable to look at. (Which he very much is.)

☆ wriothesley ☆

— He's so touchy and extra cuddly that sometimes that extra cuddly can be too extra, resulting in a near impossible mission to get out of bed in time for you to even get ready. Wriothesley loves holding you close to him. You're his love, and so he wants to treat you like it, but sometimes cuddles can transform into something a little bit more than just a cozy night, wrapping one's arms around the other.

Speaking of, good luck to you if you prefer being the big spoon, because you can't be the big spoon anymore. Wriothesley will always be the one to hold you, always the one to just wrap his arms around you and cherish you like never before. As previously mentioned, you're his lover, and he wants to treat you like it! Wriothesley wants to make you feel special, like you're the most important person in his life, so he'll do his best to give you that.

Also, I feel as though he'd whisper to you a lot. Even if there's no need to be quiet, he finds it intimate to just lean in and whisper compliments in your ear while holding you close. It doesn't matter what situation you're in; it doesn't matter where you guys are, even if you're talking about your day or the constellations in the skies above, he'll interrupt you, lean in close and just say something about your eyes, maybe your clothes, but preferably your lips.

Wriothesley would also love kissing you at random whenever you cuddle. Not to say he doesn't already do that outside of cuddles, but it's just, to him, you look amazing. You look cute, and why wouldn't he kiss you when you're his gracious lover? He hopes that he doesn't go overboard and accidentally make you uncomfortable, but at the same time, he knows you enjoy it— that smile on your face every time he pecks a kiss on your nose or cheek tells him everything he needs to know.

Before I forget, he doesn't prefer cuddles during any time of the day, but given his job, it's mainly during his afternoon tea breaks, and 100% at night in bed with you. To be honest, if he could, he'd take a full day off just to hold you tight and spend the day with you, wrapped like burritos in a blanket and sipping the day away with refreshments and love.

Some day, he might as well do just that.

☆ lyney ☆

— If it weren't for his job as a magician and as part of the fatui, he wouldn't let go of you. When Lyney can, he clings to you like a lost child who had finally found their parent in a big city. He holds your waist with one hand and performs little magic tricks with the other to impress you. Lyney's a very clingy, touchy lover.

When cuddling, he loves getting super close to the point where there's almost no space between the two of you. But on the occasion, he'll snuggle so close that it's basically just a tight hug—the only difference is that you're both lying down. The only times he isn't super, mega close to you, is when he's making rainbow roses appear randomly around your body. Most of the time, it's all fun and innocent, but other times, Lyney enjoys the look on your face when he does something quite bold.

Also, Lyney's very talkative while cuddling. Even in moments of relaxation, he'll take the time to just stare at you, even if he can't get the full view because of the ungodly lack of space, Lyney will look at you and start complimenting you. He loves you so much, and that's another huge way to show it. He's a romantic kind of guy. If there's a way to show his affection, he will take and use that way to show his affection. He loves your smile; he loves it when you blush, and it slowly grows more evident by the second because he starts to blush, too. Also, Lyney would immediately just hold you more at the sight of your reaction.

Nevertheless, his need to be close can change. Whenever he's out on a mission given by Arlecchino— more specifically, an assassination mission— you won't see him for a good three days. Even when the mission's complete, he'd want to seek out your love, comfort, and affection, but he stops himself. Lyney believes that his hands are still painted with the blood of the murdered, no matter how many times he washes or scrubs them, he'll still see the visible darkening red blood stains. There's no way he's even going near you with those kinds of sins straight on his body. It's sad, and you might have to seek him out yourself if he doesn't show up for the next few days. When you do find him, the moment he sees you is when that wall of guilt shatters, and he nearly breaks down seeing you again. Seeing you every day made him used to you, and just a few days of deprivation made him feel miserable. The simple, mere sight of you had him almost sobbing, running back to you and holding you tight, finally reunited with the one he loves most.

Were he not guilty of association with the fatui, he wouldn't have ever needed or wanted to let go.

☆ dan heng☆

— Blushing little mess. He's never a fan of PDA, so even when he does want to hold you outside of his or your room, he doesn't. Hence why the moment you both enter the private space of a hotel room or a bedroom, Dan Heng takes your hand and leads you to the bed for cuddles. He loves them, really, but he's a flustered mess of a lover because of how embarrassed he felt about being so clingy.

He's a big spoon, too, so he holds you close to him while cuddling. He likes the closeness, but he hates how visibly red his face gets, so he buries his face into your shoulder to hide. Sometimes, he just lays there listening to you or simply calming down in silence, but he does like hearing your voice before bed. It helps him sleep, and it somehow prevents nightmares of Blade. Quick note, your comfort and warmth make him feel safe through the night, and you accompany him when he'd usually be alone, either on his phone or reading a book.

PS: Dan Heng prefers to sleep in your room and/or in a hotel room because your bed and the hotel's provided beds are much more comfortable than a sleeping bag. He loves wrapping a blanket around the two of you and holding you like that. He says it's so you both get an even amount of warmth, and neither of you takes more of the blanket than the other, but he really does it because he feels a bit closer to you.

In his Imbibitor Lunae form, sleeping with him gets a bit harder, simply because he finds it harder to control himself. But when he can control himself, he'll let you run your fingers through his long hair, maybe even letting you touch his horns. Still, he doesn't allow the latter too often for reasons left unsaid. Anyway, he dislikes using this form because of how it reminds him of his former's past. He feels as though he's trapped in the memories and sin that are not his own. Yet, you make him feel comfortable in his own skin. He feels free with you; he feels alive, and he loves you for your ability to make him feel that way. Dan Heng will do everything in his ability to make you feel the same way.

And he likely already has.

☆ argenti ☆

— The most proper and romantic. Compliments littered across your entire figure, his hand in yours kissing your knuckles constantly with the addition of the most rosey and romantic sweet nothings. Argenti is old-fashioned and the most romantic, as he believes that this is the only way to live for his adored Aeon. The most comment compliment you'd hear between kisses is, “you're the most exquisite person in my world,” and Argenti would always wink with his compliments. Sometimes, it's wonderful to be the subject of his rose-colored words, but other times, it gets old; you become slightly lovesick.

The solution to that is conversation while holding each other in bed, or perhaps it's simply ushering Argenti to cuddle with you beneath the stars at night. It's beautiful to see the galaxy in its brightest moments, hovering from the dark skies. Argenti would silently pray to his Aeon, thanking her profusely for letting him see this wonderful view in person.

Still. You are his lover, and sometimes the weight of fear and trauma gets to him. Argenti often looks to you to confide in, and usually, nights like these are rarely cuddle nights, but sometimes, when it gets bad, you'll hold him in the night while he talks about his past— the wars, the music, the old friends, the worries— and how terrifying it can be if he would succumb to the same fate as his once so honorable friend. In exchange for your comfort, he holds you close and vows to protect you in your dreams and from the moment you wake to the moment you sleep again.

Argenti prefers to cuddle in bed, during a picnic, or beneath the stars. He seldom makes exceptions for heavy PDA, but when it comes to cuddling in public, even if there are people around during the day or at night, if it's stargazing or a picnic, he doesn't care as much. He'll smile, his eyes set only on you, not the eyes that may linger on your cuddles.

He doesn't care enough to look at anyone else, not when the embodiment of beauty lays right by him.

☆ blade ☆

— He's cautious. Blade's name takes after his weapon, and though he himself is not a sword, he still worries that he'll hurt you through cuddles. Blade is marastruck, and if it starts to get to him, he's terrified that it'll strike you, too. He admires death and the concept of it, but for you to die and for him to live with that? Impossible.

Anyway, convincing him is still 100% doable. When you do cuddle with him, he holds you with hesitation and care. He doesn't show it, as he masks his emotions with lips pursed to a line, but he feels relief. He feels happy, even, but he can't really tell. The Mara has calmed, and he can catch a break from the trauma. Something worth noting: Blade's trauma might cause him to cling to you, holding you close for comfort and reassurance— but that's only when he finds himself to be desperate for your love and affection. It's the one thing that keeps him together; your smile alone can mend all of his wounds, physical or not.

That can happen at any time of the day, but he'll typically seek you out at night. Blade will— without a spoken word— hug you from behind with a sigh of relief, and he'll take you to the nearest spot with the most privacy, and he'll hold you tight once more without a sign of letting you go. He loves you, and without even saying that he does, you already have all the evidence you need to conclude that he does. Holding you feels like heaven, in Blade's eyes. Once he gets past his fears of hurting you, he'll wrap his arms around your waist, but if he cuddles with you from behind, he'll wrap his arms beneath your chest, all with a sigh of relief and the tiniest hint of a smile.

The two of you cuddling is cute, so cute that Silver Wolf just had to stream it and broadcast one of your cuddle sessions to all of the other Stellaron Hunters.

Of course, you and Blade will never cuddle near any of the Stellaron Hunters ever again after that.

[nvuy]

Boothill is a “your pleasure is my pleasure” kind of guy do u agree 🎤

mdni. im snatching the mic. i got carried away ty anon for giving me an excuse to ramble about this loser.

he takes pleasing you very seriously. this is serious business. it’s like his day job.

he’s half-convinced he was given a second life just to cross paths with you, so once he’s got you, he’s not letting you go. not for a while, at least. he’s stuck to your hip like glue. wherever you go, he’s most likely right next to you.

he’s always making sure you’re catered to first.

it’s the same in bed.

he’s extremely touch starved, so while he’s got his hand between your legs, he’s also busied himself nuzzling his cheek to yours to feel you helplessly panting against his skin. or, his ear is resting against your heart. whatever works for him in the moment.

he’s absolutely smitten with how warm you get. he’s always, always, pressing himself against you one way or another. just touch all over his face, please and thank you.

he’s all for kisses too. sometimes, when he’s having a bit too much fun, he’ll get all mushy and gross. not that he already isn’t, but it somehow gets worse.

he’ll bite too. not enough to make you bleed, but enough to leave an angry mark for the next few days.

actually, he just nips you all the time. it’s a weird thing he does. don’t point fingers in his face. he’ll try eating them. he’s very strange in that way. sometimes you can be gesturing at nothing while you talk, and if your fingers get too close to his face, he’s trying to nip at them like a teething puppy. you got used to it.

great tongue too. bonus points because it’s actually real. he works his magic with it, but only after you beg enough. you gotta work to get your hands on the merchandise. his mechanics are expensive, so play nice.

if we’re getting into unserious business, the robocock is great fun. it’s got smooth ridges and it’s cold. probably customisable, too. it’s definitely possible, but whether he’s gonna wander up to some poor mechanic and ask them to add some special features… well.

either way, your pleasure is always his priority. his hobbies consist of biting every single exposed expanse of your skin and exploring new ways to make you squirm.

it’s bad enough you having to deal with this lump of steel and scrap—frankly, he doesn’t even understand what’s so appealing about it—but if you enjoy bouncing on his lap, go ahead. do it all night for all he cares. as long as you have that pretty dizzy smile on your face by the end of it all. it makes him melt into a puddle of liquid metal knowing how good he makes you feel.

he’s also VERY susceptible to puppy eyes. they’re your greatest asset, and his biggest weakness.

you figured that out after you pleaded with him to put on these clothes you bought him (and, yep. these clothes have just as many cut outs as his usual attire). you can also use them if you want to do his hair. please convince him to wear it in a high ponytail more. he has such a nice face, and it also stops his neck from overheating. those poor fans need a vacation.

it takes some convincing, especially when you show him the hair tie is actually a red sparkly ribbon. you’re going to ruin his tough guy persona. but he’ll drop anything for you, so he’ll comply. on the condition that you give him smooches afterwards. it’s also an excuse for him to indulge in how your fingers feel against his scalp.

puppy eyes, crying, begging, whatever, usually get people he’s apprehended nowhere. he doesn’t care for theatrics. not at all. a criminal is a criminal at the end of the day.

but you? aww, how can he say no to your angel eyes? wanna fuck his face? you didn’t even have to ask! just watch the teeth. and feel free to pull his hair. wanna ride him until he short circuits? sure! if you can keep up. he’s all yours.

and when you’re done, his aftercare consists of coddling and pinching your cheeks. he’ll prattle on about nothing. the subject will change to gushing over how pretty you look in his bed, to the weather tomorrow, to how he misses the taste of spaghetti. he’ll even kiss all over the marks he’s left on you. probably kicks his feet too.

he’s still so energetic it’s mind-baffling. he’s so casual about it too, acting as if he didn’t beg for you to cum on his face just ten minutes ago.

but that’s robot stamina for you. or maybe it’s just a boothill thing. who knows?

after a while he’ll calm down. i still haven't decided if he can sleep, but once you’ve fallen asleep, he’ll lay next to you and draw patterns on the nape of your neck with his fingers.

[polydamnory]

Poly Shaw Pack Headcanons

⚠️SOME NSFW BELOW - LIKE ONLY 2 BUT STILL YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED)⚠️

Sometimes when David says something kind of snappy or rude to Angel (tsunderes gonna tsundere), Darlin will just come up, pick Angel up, and walk away saying “nope. Mate privileges revoked” - doesn’t matter if Angel isn’t bothered by it, he was mean

Milo HAS borrowed that choke collar from Baaabe and used it on Asher 👀👀👀

Almost all of them have tried their hand at teaching Asher how to cook - none have succeeded

Asher and Angel both keep getting caught late night gaming by the others, and David. Is. Not. Happy about it.

Sweetheart doesn’t purposefully sneak up on/startle Darlin the way they do Milo - they know that due to Darlin’s past trauma, they’re a lot more likely to lean more towards the fight part of fight or flight instincts, as well as just not wanting to accidentally trigger them in general

The non-shifter mates will go on a group date just the four of them once a month - the shifters do too but most of the time they just end up playing video games together (Asher) or spending some time in their wolf forms

Milo and Angel are both huge dorks for Aggro and baby him excessively

When Darlin gets really touch starved (which is most of the time), the rest of the polycule just kind of pile on top of them

Baaabe and David learned how to cook some of the dishes Sam’s grandmother used to make for him to help him feel better on the anniversary of her death - Darlin tried to help but got kicked out of the kitchen

Asher and Sweetheart occasionally team up to fuck with Milo (also Christian lol)

Angel moves around in their sleep a lot so whoever’s closest to them in bed have to be the ones to essentially smother them to keep them from accidentally kicking or punching somebody in their sleep

Solar Solstices are TOUGH with them all staying together, but thankfully the four non-shifters can team up to tackle it - Baaabe’s on cooking duty, Angel’s the one keeping David and Darlin from getting up out of bed (they are NOT above sitting on you, Darlin, stop it!), and Sweetheart and Sam team up to do some sleeping or healing magic - it doesn’t help much, but it’s something. They typically end up watching movies or playing some easy video games that at least keep them laying/sitting down for a majority of the day. EDIT: the lovely @darlin-collins (sorry for the at) has pointed out to me that both stealth’s AND vampires are negatively affected by the sun bound solstice so I guess Angel and Baaabe are gonna have to fight for their fucking lives lol

The mates groupchat still exists and Asher begs to be let in it like once a week

Darlin kind of wants to be included in it too but refuses to admit it

Asher and Angel can both dress like total gremlins and it physically pains Milo to have to see it

Baaabe has dommed most of the others at some point

Sam took a bit to feel comfortable asking to feed on any of them other than Darlin, and even then he still typically goes to them first if he’s feeling hungry - he doesn’t really have a favorite, it's just that in that regard he feels the most comfortable with them specifically

Asher will shift and comfort any and all of them in his wolf form like he does for Baaabe - he has to do it a lot for Sweetheart, their job has them stressed

David often feels like he’s babysitting a bunch of toddlers because even when they were just friends, the stupid shit this group would get themselves caught up in is insane - the fact that none of them have been arrested yet is a miracle in itself. No, Sam is not an exception.

Darlin, Milo and Angel are all terrible with horror movies (this is canon) and David sometimes likes to choose one he knows will particularly get them when it’s his pick for movie night just to fuck with them

I feel like some of these could technically apply outside the context of the polycule, and you know what, yeah that too

[detectivestucks]

Anything to Save the Marriage

18+ Content, Minors do NOT interact

Pairing: Kakashi x F!Reader x Obito

Summary: You are left missing your husband Kakashi while he spends all hours at headquarters busy with his Hokage duties. Obito sees how lonely you are and uses his new jutsu to save your marriage while living out his adolescent fantasy.

Warnings: NSFW, shibari, candle wax, unprotected penetration, mind control

Word Count: 5.9k

“Hi Angel. What brings you by?” Kakashi asks his doting wife.

You gently set a boxed lunch down on his desk before giving his cheek a kiss. “I’m making sure you don’t starve while serving our nation.” you say, eyes softly staring back into his with a sweet smile gracing your lips. All while resisting the urge to roll your eyes at the silly question. 

“Will you be home for supper? I was thinking of making your favorite.”

“I’m sorry Angel. I can’t tonight.”

Despite your attempt to conceal it, Kakashi sees the pang in your chest at his answer. “That’s okay.” you say as you grab his hand. “I’ll bring some to you.”

Before you could so much as begin a real conversation with your husband of several years, a shinobi enters the room with a sense of urgency. 

“Lord Sixth, we have a report.”

Kakashi looks over at you with an expression of guilt, knowing he has to go back to doing his job. 

“It’s alright, I’ll stop by later.” you say with a gracious smile as you bow your head slightly at both your husband and the jonin, before you slip out of the room. 

It had been like this for months. No one said it was easy to be married to the Hokage. But you really missed how your relationship used to be. You missed the romantic dates, the bubble baths, sneaking around in the bushes during missions, and even sharing a night's rest together. Recently he spent more time sleeping at his desk than he did in your shared bed. 

You felt awful for having such selfish thoughts. He was working so hard and doing so much for the good of everyone around you. Your sacrifice was nothing compared to his. You shake your head to rid your mind of such thoughts as you walk to the market to pick up ingredients to make his favorite dish. If you can’t spend time with him, you might as well make him as happy as you can during your brief interactions. That starts with making sure he has something good to eat.

While clouded in thought you quite literally bumped into a focused Obito, kneeling on the ground.

“Oof” he says as you roll over the boulder of a man. His built figure didn’t even shift on impact while you fell over him like a rag doll, only landing back on your feet due to muscle memory left from your days as a shinobi.

“Y/N!” he exclaims with a bright smile.

“Obito!” you say as you go in for a hug. “What are you doing?”

“I was just exercising my sharingan.”

“Exercising it?” you say intrigued. You know that one of Obito’s many abilities is that he can replicate the jutsus of his fellow shinobi. So whenever he tells you he is ‘exercising’ his eyes, you know he’s up to something good.

“I’m trying to replicate the Yamanaka mind-transfer jutsu”

“Ohhh, that’s a fascinating one! Why didn’t you try that years ago while you were still out on missions?”

“I don’t know. Cause I’m thick and didn’t think of it till a few weeks ago.”

“A few weeks? It seems you’ve lost your touch.”

Obito gives you a half hearted glare. It was easy to mimic a jutsu while someone was doing it infront of him. His sharingan only needed to follow along. It was harder to recall the jutsu from memory let alone make it his own.

“I can do the mind transfer no problem” he says defensively, “I’m trying to improve upon it.”

“Oh? So you’re trying to develop a new jutsu?”

Obito begins to blush. He can see how impressed you are and he was never good at receiving your praise. You were the only woman who could fluster him, and you never seemed to notice how you did it with ease.

“Yes, I’m trying to develop a new jutsu.” he says with a scratch to the back of his head. 

“That’s marvelous Obito!”

“Uhh, thanks!” He gives you a sheepish smile. 

“Hey, uh, do you want to get together later?”

Obito gives you a look of great surprise.

You’d grown apart in recent years. You didn’t see him much anymore. You used to hang out all the time as kids and he was the best man at your wedding to  Kakashi but after that his visits became less and less frequent. His responsibilities within the Anbu kept him out on lengthy missions and home for only a few hours at a time. However, you noticed him around more recently. Kakashi had promoted him to director of the Anbu forces. He needed someone he trusted with his life, who also had significant experience to direct his elite team. 

“Don’t look at me like that!”

“It’s just, wouldn’t you rather spend the evening with your husband?”

“Well I would,” you say sarcastically, making light fun of him “but that hasn’t really been an option as of late.”

“I-I’m sorry to hear that.” he looks at the ground feeling pity for you.

“It’s fine. He’s doing his best and what he’s doing is important. I can’t ask for anything more.”

“Well you’re truly his Angel if that’s how you feel.”

You give a small smile at his usage of Kakashi’s pet name for you.

“So, wanna hang out tonight? I’m gonna drop dinner off at Kakashi’s office but after that I’m free as a bird.”

“I don’t know Y/N”

“Oh, come on Obi, please!” you say putting on your sweetest smile, trying to sway him. “Don’t make me spend another night by myself. I think I might go deaf from the silence.”

“Fine.” he says reluctantly. He could never say no to you. It was an exceedingly frustrating power of yours. “But only if you save some of whatever you’re making for Kakashi. I want a home cooked meal out of this.”

“Deal.”

You smile victoriously at him before you say your goodbyes, continuing on your way to the market. Satisfied by your negotiation and excited to not have to spend another night alone in the isolating silence of your recent marriage. 

**************************************************

You open your front door, bags in hand. “Honey I’m home!” you sing pretending that your adoring husband will suddenly appear to take the bags out of your hands and give you a peck on the cheek. 

You let out a sad sigh as you gaze around your empty home. You really missed him. Everything about him. How he’d always greet you at the door with a helping hand. How he’d lean down to kiss you while you sat on the couch. How he’d massage your feet after a long day. How he’d make sure every Wednesday was a special date night. How he’d kiss you after your morning work out together. How you’d get a glimpse of his abs as he raised his shirt to wipe the sweat off his face. 

He was your favorite person in the entire world and he was the perfect husband. The village was indeed lucky to have him. They couldn’t be in better hands. 

Hands that were large with slender, dexterous fingers. Fingers that would graze your hips and slide up your sides as they found their way inside your shirt to grab your-

You shake your head again and wipe you drool opting to focus on the task at hand. You were sure he missed you as much as you missed him. The least you could do is support him by making sure he’s well fed. You busy yourself with getting out the pots and pans. No time to cry, you have a hungry Hokage to feed. 

Everything is made and divided out into containers. You cooked enough to last him a few meals and kept a couple helpings out for Obito. Instead of eating the dish you just prepared, you opted to make yourself a simple sandwich, wanting to save as much of the food for Kakashi as possible. 

You tidy your house (not that there was much cleaning to do given how devoid your home was of its occupants) before packing up a meal to bring to your husband. As you stroll over to headquarters you wonder how long of a conversation you’ll have this time. You wonder if you’ll get to tell him that Obito’s coming for a visit.

Or will it be a simple drive by like lunch?

You were thrilled to find him alone in his office, buried under a stack of paperwork. You sauntered up to his chair and put down his meal as you leaned against the desk. 

“Mmmm, did you bring dessert with my meal?” he says, eyeing you up and down, grabbing your hips as he stands up to tower over you. You lift your hand and slide your finger under his mask about to lower it for a kiss when the door opens yet again with three shinobi barging through. The two of you drop your hands and Kakashi sits back down in his chair.

“I’ll leave you to your work sweetie.” you say with a pat to his shoulder.

He lifts his hand to rest it on yours. “Tomorrow maybe.”

You give him a half hearted smile, knowing that ‘maybe’ means ‘no’ but you didn’t want him to feel guilty so you pretend that it’s okay and you quietly exit his office.

Once out of sight you let a few tears trickle down your cheeks. It had been days since you so much as kissed your husband. The loneliness was starting to consume you. Each interaction left you feeling more alone than the last. You felt a pressure on your chest. You couldn’t shake the feeling and it caused you to hiccup during your walk home. 

You stride up to your front door to see a mildly annoyed Obito waiting for you. You smile upon seeing him but his face drops into a look of deep concern.

“Y/N, what is it? What’s wrong?”

You realize he must have caught a sliver of your unhappiness before he had brightened your mood.

“It’s nothing.” you say unconvincingly as another hiccup follows your response.

“It’s not nothing. You know better than to lie to me.”

“It’s okay Obito. It’s not something that can be helped.” you say moving past him to unlock the door. Another hiccup betraying your attempts to seem fine.

The two of you step inside when Obito spins you around placing both arms on your shoulders. 

“You’re not fine. What’s going on?” 

He gives you a serious stare.  You fold and let out a deep breath. Feeling the tears brim along your lash line, you squeak out, “I- I just- I miss my husband.”

His heart ached. You were the sweetest little flower. Always so pure, with a heart made of gold, reserved just for Kakashi. Of course his absence would affect you more. How could it not? He had the distraction of taking care of the village while you were the one sleeping in an empty bed.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I didn’t think about how lonely it must be for you.”

“It’s silly, I know.” you say ashamed, wiping your eyes.

“It’s not silly. It’s human.” He gives you a hug. “Well…I’m here now. Care to do something together?”

“Yes please.” You speak into his chest.   

He laughs at how adorable your muffled request sounds before letting go.

You stride over to your closet and pull out a couple board games. “You interested in playing any of these?”

A malicious grin tugs at the corners of his lips as he looks up at you. “You’re really gonna let me choose?”

You laugh already knowing which game he is gunning for.

“Go ahead. You know you want to.”

For the first time in months laughter filled your home. Effortless conversation flowed between you and your old friend. Warmth that had been absent for weeks occupied the room. 

Obito was relieved to see you smile. Happiness suits you. You fill the room with joy when you smile, no matter where you are or what you’re doing. When you’re happy it infects everyone around you. Seeing you anything but happy brings an uncomfortable tightness to his core. 

“Y/N, I’m sorry I haven’t been checking in on you.”

“It’s not your responsibility, Obito.”

“Yes it is. I’m your friend and I work with Kakashi. I knew how much he’d been sleeping at the office. I should have come over sooner.”

You look at the board in front of you not wanting Obito to see your eyes mist up so easily at the reminder of your loneliness. He reaches over and grabs your hand.

“I’ll be back tomorrow. If Kakashi’s home I’ll leave you two be, and if he’s not, you can take your shot at redemption.”

You glare at him with a smile,“You little shit.” He always got so cocky when you played board games together, but the relief of knowing you would have company was clearly visible to him. 

You walk him to the door to wish him goodbye. He pulls you in tight and kisses the top of your head. “It’ll all be okay. It’s just temporary.”

“That’s what I keep telling myself.”

Though he felt genuinely terrible for you, he couldn’t help but savor the hug. You were so beautiful and Obito wished he could hold you like this all the time. 

You never knew about Obito’s feelings for you. He had them ever since puberty. You were always pretty, but you grew into a real beauty around the age of fourteen. Obito certainly wasn’t the only boy to notice you either. However, being your friend, he already knew which boy had taken a hold of your heart, and Obito knew from a young age that he never stood a chance. 

Despite what a little prick Kakashi was back in the day, Obito also knew Kakashi had feelings for you too. You were one of the only classmates he was respectful towards and he sometimes would give you a compliment or words of praise. Something his arrogant younger self did seldom. It wouldn’t be till much later that he actually began to pursue you. Obito never told Kakashi about his feelings towards you, but he’s sure Kakashi still knew. Shortly after the wedding he asked for an uptake in missions, not wanting to be around to witness your marital bliss. He needed space to get over you and the missions stood to occupy his mind while he did just that.  He would never do anything to jeopardize your relationship though. He supported you both. 

Yet now here you are, warm in his arms, body pressed up against his. He chuckles knowing his younger self would have fainted. Regrettably you let go of him and it was time to leave you be.

When Obito left you turned to face your empty house. The silence is as excruciating as ever. You clean the dishes and put away the boardgames. You brush your hair and teeth, dress in your pajamas and slip in between the covers to spend another night alone. You roll over to look at Kakashi’s side of the bed. You imagine him laying down next to you. Stroking your hand and kissing the back of it to say goodnight. You let out a deep sigh before closing your eyes and drifting off to sleep. 

*************************************************

The next morning you whip up breakfast, pack it in a container and go find your husband. You turn the knob of Kakashi’s office and open the door to find him asleep at his desk. Softly snoring with a small drop of drool wetting his mask; he looked so peaceful. You didn’t want to wake him so you quietly placed his breakfast near him before brushing his hair out of his face and planted a light kiss on his forehead.

“Maybe I’ll catch you at lunch, love” you whisper to him and with that, you retreat to your home. 

Obito catches you on your way out the building. He sees the defeated look on your face and knows, once again you were unable to spend time with your husband. He had never seen you look so sad. He started to worry about you. 

Predictably, Kakashi could not come home. He spent another evening in his office while you spent the evening with Obito. Not only could he see how lonely you are but he could see how badly you craved intimacy. Intimacy in any form. Be it a kiss, a hug, or just holding hands. He could feel the tension in your chakra. It was so thick that it started to stir desires in him that he had long suppressed. He needed to alleviate your frustration, to save your marriage. If Kakashi wasn’t careful he may lose you. You have needs after all. If he wasn’t going to pay his wife any attention, you may look elsewhere. Luckily Kakashi happened to have a friend ready and willing to help. 

What Obito told you was true. He could do the mind transfer jutsu just fine. He was adding onto it. Instead of just taking over the body while the other person sat passenger side observing what was happening, he was working to make it so that the mind of the possessed person believed they were making the choices of their own accord while Obito was in full control. Less of a mind transfer jutsu and more of a mind control jutsu. This would be a perfect time to test it out.

Your needy body would finally be taken care of by your absentee husband while he, Obito, did all the things to you he had always wanted to.

…for the sake of your marriage of course. 

While you turn on the television, he puts his arm around your shoulders and pulls you into him. 

“Don’t worry, Y/N, I’m gonna make sure he takes the night off tomorrow.”

“Pfff, good luck.”

“I’m serious. I’ll make sure of it. Even if I need to stay at the office in his place. I’ll make sure me and Shikamaru have it covered.”

“I’ll believe it when I see it, Obi” you retort as you lay your head against his chest, feeling the comfort of having literally anyone to lean against. 

He kissed the top of your head before facing the tv, allowing his mind to swarm with all the memories of things he’s wanted to do to you over the years. A cloying smile involuntarily splitting his face. 

************************************************

The next afternoon Obito strutted into Kakashi’s office.

“Hey Obito, how can I help you?”

“You’re spending the night with your wife.”

Kakashi looked down, feeling guilt weigh on him.

“You haven’t been home in days and you smell. Go home and take a shower.”

“I just took a shower in the Anbu locker room this morning!”

“Fine. You haven’t been home in days and you have bags under your eyes. Go home and take a nap.”

“What’s up with you?”

Obito turns to ‘look around the room’ while he discretely weaves hand signs before turning back towards Kakashi. He faced Kakashi, leaning over the desk so his eyes were inches from him. 

“I think it’s a good idea to go home, can you stay behind and cover me, Obito?”

And like a hypnotized parrot Kakashi repeats, 

“I think it’s a good idea to go home, can you stay behind and cover me, Obito?”

Obito smiles as Kakashi stands up and walks around the desk. Obito had Kakashi shake his hand and leave the room. As he does, Obito takes a seat in Kakashi’s chair and closes his eyes to sit back and enjoy the ride as he steers Kakashi home towards your sweet arms. 

***************************************************

Standing outside your home Obito digs the keys out of Kakashi’s pocket and opens the door. He can hear the shower running in your en suite bathroom. He closes the door behind him just as you turn off the water. 

Obito’s heart begins to flutter. She’s already naked. He quickly strides over to catch you drying yourself off with a fuzzy towel.

 You look marvelous. More beautiful than he even imagined. Your perky mounds hanging just a little lower without the support of a bra, nipples stiffened from the cold air outside the warm shower, they stood at attention for his gaze. Your waistline cinched in before filling out around your hips where your glutes rounded your frame. Thighs plush and grabable thinning out towards your ankles where polished toenails adorned your feet.

“Babe?” you say in complete surprise as you look back at your husband staring at you more intensely than he ever has in his life.

“Oh hey baby!”

“Baby? Since when do you call me baby?" You say, still shocked that your husband is standing in your home and has the most bizarre look of hunger on his face.

“Sorry Angel, I’m just so tired. I forgot myself.” Obito says stretching Kakashi’s mouth into a warm smile

“Oh, if that’s the case, I’ll warm up some food so you can eat and go to bed.” 

You wrap the towel around your chest, walking towards Kakashi to get clothes from your bedroom dresser. Obito stops you with Kakashi’s arm against the doorframe.

“Actually, if I’m gonna eat, I can think of something I’d like instead.” 

He felt ridiculous saying it, but he’d always wanted to try a bold line like that with you. At least that’s how he imagines it in his fantasies.

You give him a devious smile through your lashes. Thank gods!

You lunge upwards locking your lips onto your husband's mouth, arms wrapped around his neck as your towel falls to the floor. Obito feels Kakashi’s entire body set on fire. He needed to be rid of these pesky clothes ASAP. Before he places his hands on you, he’s pulling off his jacket and tugging down his pants while you pull off his shirt. He wanted to feel your soft bare skin against his toned chest. 

Bodies completely barren, Obito cannot get enough of your taste as Kakashi’s body stands up to his full height. Hands greedily exploring your skin, Obito had never known perfection till he touched you. 

Pent up sexual frustration made you eager. You kissed down your husband’s body as you sank to your knees. Lips delicately kissing along each muscle during your descent. Obito could feel your warm breath on Kakashi’s chest. His heart was fluttering at the sensation and he almost lost himself with the excitement of what was about to happen next.

You settle on your knees before him, hand around his base and mouth kissing his tip. You take in only the head while your tongue toys with the slit. Obito’s eyes roll back into Kakashi’s skull. You were masterful with your tongue. You hand stroked his shaft while your mouth kept playing, focusing the suction on just his end. 

“Fuuuck, Angel.”

Your bright eyes beam up at him with a less than angelic gleam. You enjoyed this. You liked manipulating him with your mouth. You enjoyed how it was making his knees weak and causing him to lean on the wall. He did not expect this from you. 

He placed Kakashi’s hand on the back of your head, gently pushing you down on his length. You gladly accepted, allowing your nose to kiss his silver happy trail. Obito couldn’t help but give out a choked groan. It sounded so strange hearing him groan in Kakashi’s voice but you took him so well and the sensation of your throat tight around the end of his shaft was beyond anything he had ever dared to imagine. 

Without asking, you bobbed back and forth, dick sliding in and out with ease as you kept your mouth wide open. You let the slobber pool around your bottom lip and spill onto your chest and thighs as you sink back on your heels. 

Wanting you to go faster, he twisted your hair into a ponytail and guided you along at a quickened pace. The lewd noises of your throat closing around his tip over and over again rang through the air. His cock began twitching. He was about to cum. Dammit, not yet!

Feeling him twitch, you reach up and massage his jewels, only making it harder for him to contain himself. No amount of restraint could stop it from happening. He felt the seed gush out of his tip and swirl around your throat before you swallowed it. Your throat closing around his softening dick as you did. 

You stand up, a little bit of drool mixed with cum falling out of the corner of your mouth as you smile and wipe it off.

“Very good baby. You ready to give me round two?”

Round two?! Obito thought. Is this normal for them? Sure enough, as the thought formed, so did the erection swelling and pushing its way between your plush thighs. 

Thank gods Kakashi can go multiple rounds back to back. Now I can really play. 

He corners you in the room, caging you against the wall with his arms. You have a look of fear in your eyes that has excitement etched behind it.

“What are you going to do to me Daddy?”

Obito could feel Kakashi’s nipples stiffen at the pet name. He reached out Kakashi’s hand and enclosed it around your slender throat.

“I’m going to tie you up and abuse those beautiful holes of your’s.”

Your eyes were set ablaze. 

Closing the fingers tighter around your throat, he leans down and whispers in your ear. 

“Now go get the rope, slut.”

You moan and try to crane your head to kiss him. He squeezes harder and tuts. 

“Not till you bring me your bindings.”

The weight on your throat is released. You scamper over to where you keep the condoms, lube, cuffs, and rope. You grab the bundle and return to a waiting Kakashi. Silver hair looming above you, scarred face looking down with lust, as his lips hungrily curl above his beauty mark. Your inner thighs were a mess, thick slick coating them in excitement.

“Turn”

You face away from him and hold your hands behind your back. He ties around your wrists and runs the rope in between them. You give a small moan as the knot tightens. Obito felt Kakashi’s pulse quicken. Maybe he could take this a step further.

“You like that don’t you.”

“Mhm” you whimper

Obito has Kakashi pull the rope tight around your elbows and torso, knotting your arms in a shibari pattern. 

When the fuck had Kakashi learned this?!

You were on the verge of cumming before he even touched between your legs. When he was done he pushed you down on the bed. Your face planted into the soft mattress and your rear was raised high in the air. Kakashi swatted your bottom and you let out squeals of pleasure. 

“Does my little slut like that?”

“Yes Daddy.”

“Well you shouldn’t!” he scolds with a heavy spank.

You scream in a mix of pain and pleasure.

“Look how wet you are for me. Mind if I have my meal?”

You nod with your face still smushed into the mattress.

Obito dives in anxious to know how you taste. It was sweet with a hint of a tangy aftertaste. How could it not be sweet? It was you. He could feast down here for hours. You had so much cum to lap up from your weeks of pent up desire. He hoped that he could keep a hold of Kakashi’s mind long enough to taste it all.

He licked your thighs clean first. Enjoying your moans as Kakashi’s velvety tongue ran up your sensitive skin. Then he tickled your bud as he pointed his tongue, letting it sink into your hole while it made its way from your clit to your rear, gathering as much of your sweet cream as it could. His tongue scoops out the white dessert from between your folds and he can hear you hyperventilate with pleasure. He looked down at your feet and saw how your toes curled. He did that. He made your toes curl. 

“Ah! Please! Fuck me Daddy!”

Obito had Kakashi flip you over, your body resting on top of your bound arms, your knees propped up and spread open. 

“Not till I taste every last drop.” He husks into your heat. 

A trail of goosebumps visible on your abdomen. He kneels on the side of the bed and pulls you down into his face as his nose nudges against your ticklish bud. Sucking and slurping you squirm from the stimulation. You scream praises and thank him for how he spoils you. His ears ringing with satisfaction. He starts rutting against the side of the bed, needing friction against the length between his legs.

Finding the will to stop, a large hand slaps down against your sex causing you to flinch. Your pitiful cry was enough to make precum leak onto the bedspread. 

Lining up with your slit, he pushes between your folds. His vision goes white and for a moment he thinks he lost control of the jutsu. But he can still feel you. No, he’s still in control. He takes a deep breath that is broken up by a shudder as your walls swallow every inch. 

I’m only marrying a girl if she feels exactly like this. How does Kakashi ever leave her alone? I don’t think I’d be able to leave the bed.

Vision coming back, he looks down on you. You’re biting your tongue anxiously waiting for his thrusts. A crooked smile twisting onto his face, he gives a punctuated thrust that scoots you up the bed. 

“Is that what you were waiting for?” 

He does it again.

You nod pathetically. 

“My little slut needed some friction?”

“Yes Daddy.”

His grin widening, he thrusts into you with all of his might. It was violent. How you were able to handle his passion amazed him. You should be split in half by this but instead your eyes roll back in enjoyment. Kakashi certainly kept this bit of information to himself. No worries, he knows your dirty little secret now.

Stacking your knees on top of each other, he lays you on your side, continuing his assault. Your sounds filled the room. He covers your mouth to hear how cute you sound muffled by his hand. His fingers feel as tears prick at the corners of your eyes. 

“Yes, take it.”

You allow your head to collapse onto the bed as a guttural groan falls from your lips.

Obito looks over at the scented candle lit beside the bed. He pushes your shoulder back down so you are on your back, legs sprawled. A mischievous grin graced his face before you caught the glint of danger that flashed across Kakash’s eyes as he reached for the candle. 

You bite your lip in anticipation of what happens next. Length still filling your needy walls, he tips the candle so that melted wax drips onto your chest. You feel it sear your skin as it drips to your nipple. He tilts again. Your hips buck up as you pull air between your teeth. Kakashi’s mouth grunts as he feels you constrict around him from the pain. Your eyes burn with lust, daring him to keep going but he can’t contain himself. Obito resumes his earlier pace as he watches the wax harden on your tits. 

All he can think as he drives into you is how can Kakashi stand to be away from you instead of doing filthy things to your perfect body? Sweat rolls down his arms and chest. Squelching emits from between your legs. Mewling from your lips. He couldn’t stop himself from dragging in and out of you, even if he wanted to. 

Fingers dig deep in your flesh as he grips you. Desperate to keep your hips flush with his. You preen at the depth of his intrusion while your arms go numb from your bindings. He leans down, needing his lips on yours. Slowing down his thrust so they were long but deep with each inward snap. 

You bit his lip, pulling back as you open your eyes to gaze up at him. You were happy. Your face was tired and fucked out, but you were happier than he’s seen you all week. 

“Am I taking good care of you Angel?”

“Mmm, yes Daddy, thank you.”

Obito begins to peel off the hardened wax while he casually thrust fore and aft. You squirm and clamp down around him as each piece releases. The feeling making him twitch inside of you. 

You gasp as he peels off the wax directly over your nipple. Like ripping off a bandaid, you wince, before his tongue licks soothing circles over your irritated nub. Soft moans of relief fill Kakashi’s ears, running circles of joy around Obito’s mind. 

His arms circle around you while he suckles. His fingers finding their way under the rope, gripping the intricate ties. You gush around him while his tongue flicked over your nubs made sensitive from the removal of the hardened wax. Sealing his lips around them and sucking in hard, you coo for him as slick drips onto the bed underneath where your bodies meet. 

“Mmm, you’re just a little slut, aren’t you? Cumming for me like this.”

“Yes, ah!”

Obito releases you and flips you onto your knees, face again shoved into the mattress. Lining the tip up once more, every inch finds itself buried inside of you. Your vulgar noises are lost in the soft bed as you’re pounded from behind. Thighs colliding with your rear, balls slapping against your swollen bud. You immediately cum, walls fluttering around the length inside of you. 

Obito doesn’t care, he continues to use Kakashi to rail through you, not giving your sensitive cunt a second to recover. You spiral into orgasm again. Toes curling as you screech from the over stimulation. You writhe under him causing him to lose control. Spilling Kakashi’s spend inside of you as he thrusts erratically, milking every drop into your tight hole. 

Still inside, Obito reaches over, grabbing the kunai from Kakashi’s nightstand and cuts through the rope, releasing your arms before collapsing on top of you. You close your eyes feeling comforted by the weight and warmth of his body on top of yours.. Obito peppered kisses on your cheek as you gave your husband the most radiant smile. 

He leaned up looking for the towel you dropped earlier and saw the white milk leak out of you. He groaned at the sight wishing to etch it into his memory forever. 

“Care for another shower?”

You give him a knowing smile trodding after him. You hold each other under the warm spray. Hands playfully exploring the other. Obito hums as you feel Kakashi’s built backside, digging your fingers in as you pull yourself into him. 

He wrapped his arms around you, resting his chin on the top of your head and closing his eyes. Obito wanted to stay. He wanted to know what it would be like to lay with you, to wake up next to you, have you cook him breakfast, but he couldn’t risk someone catching him in Kakashi’s office. 

He released the jutsu, knowing Kakashi will sleep well in his bed next to his wife. 

When Obito blinks his eyes, he finds himself back in his own body. He looks down and sees that he’s made a mess of the front of his pants. 

Shit, really?! Well this was an unforeseen side effect.

Masterlist

[stolenslumber]

devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes (pjs)

Jay needs someone to pretend to be his girlfriend, and you’re just the person for the job— seriously, you’re almost a professional at this point, regularly charming the families of your idiot twin’s friends who need your help getting their parents off their back. Of course, leave it up to Jay to blur the lines of your fake relationship so smoothly that you catch real feelings; falling in love has never been this easy.

PAIRING: park jongseong x female reader GENRE: acquaintances to partners in crime to fake dating to lovers i guess? lol, college au, vaguely greek life au, vaguely rich kid au, fluff fluff fluff, jake is the mc’s twin bc i thought it would be funny WARNINGS: swearing, kissing and suggestive content/sexual themes WORD COUNT: 14.4k A/N: ik the ages don't line up here shhhh just ignore that okay

NOW AVAILABLE: hang your head low in the glow (companion fic/follow-up)

“WHY DO YOU LOOK SO NICE?” 

“Why do you sound so surprised?” You scoff, tossing the apple you were just about to eat at Jake’s head. Annoyingly, he catches it in mid-air, then makes a show out of polishing it with his shirt and taking a big bite out of it. “Hey, I was going to eat that, asshole.”

“Shouldn’t have thrown it at me, then.” 

You roll your eyes at your twin, then go to retrieve another apple from the fruit bowl. It’s surprisingly well-stocked, given that you’re in a frat’s kitchen. Honestly, it’s surprising that there even is a fruit bowl in a frat’s kitchen, but the president of this frat runs a tight ship.

Said president appears in the doorway just then, snatching the apple from your hands as well as the one from Jake’s hands. “Guys, seriously, you have to wash these before you eat them.”

You and Jake both whine simultaneously. “Chan!” 

“I already took a bite out of that, bro,” Jake complains.

“I’m starving; please have mercy,” you beg.

Chan whips his head around from where he’d begun washing the apples in the sink to fuss at you. “What? Why haven’t you eaten yet? It’s almost 9pm!”

“Which reminds me— why do you look so nice?” Jake repeats.

“I had a thing with Mark,” you sigh. 

“You can just say you were pretending to be his girlfriend; we all know what you mean,” Jake snorts.

“I had a thing with Mark,” you repeat, resisting the urge to throw another apple at Jake’s head. “It was at this ballroom downtown, and of course he had nothing to wear, so I had to take him shopping first, which made us late, and then his parents wouldn’t stop talking my ear off about how I need to convince him to give up the music major, so I couldn’t touch any of the food there. Not even the foie gras torchon,” you recall mournfully. “We just got back, like, five minutes ago.”

Chan hums sympathetically— he knows how much you love foie gras torchon. “You can probably ask for an endless supply in return for your appearance at today’s thing,” he suggests, only half-joking. It absolutely sounds like the kind of thing Mark Lee would agree to, what with his ridiculously large inheritance and hapless generosity (last month, Mark lost thousands of dollars in some animal shelter-related pyramid scheme, marketed to him by none other than Lee Haechan).

You wave a hand dismissively. “Nah, I’m keeping Mark’s favor for something else.”

Jake raises an eyebrow. “What else?”

“Whatever it turns out I need in the future, dumbass. What’s it to you, anyways?” 

“Just wanna make sure the poor guy doesn’t end up trapped in your snares forever, little sis. Yo, can I have that apple back?” Jake turns to Chan with characteristic puppy eyes.

“You’re only older than me by eight minutes,” you grumble, the age-old retort slipping out of you before you can help it.

“No, Jaeyun, you cannot. And don’t talk to your sister like that— oh my god, why do I sound like Taeyong,” Chan mutters, thinking about his predecessor frat-president-slash-mother-hen. 

“Jeez, government name and everything.” Jake holds his hands up, relinquishing his claim to the apple.

“In fact, your sister gets to have both of these apples, after I clean and cut them up, because she is a saint for continuing to save our asses from our parents like this,” Chan lectures, unceremoniously carving out the chunk of the apple with Jake’s bite marks and tossing it into the trash bin.

“Real ones get it!” You reach out and high-five Chan. 

“That is so unfair, c’mon, man!” Jake splutters. “She gets just as much out of these fake relationships— seriously, didn’t you drive her around everywhere for, like, a month after she went to that wedding with you?”

Both you and Chan shudder at the memory. “Ugh, my worst cousin and the worst guy he was ever with. They’re still married, by the way.” Chan shakes his head. “God knows why.”

“Love conquers all…?” Jake offers.

“What the hell are you talking about love for,” a new voice grumbles. Park Jongseong strolls in through the doorway, hands full with plastic bags promising wonderful things based on how your stomach reacts to the smell.

“Oh, hell yeah, chicken!” Jake cheers. “Took you long enough, bro.”

“Traffic was hell; something about a ball downtown, and— oh. Hey.” Jay stops abruptly at the sight of you, now munching on the apple slices Chan hands you, one by one.

You wave vaguely in his direction, too busy eating to respond. Jay is one of your brother’s friends who you don’t know that well, since you’ve never pretended to be his girlfriend. It’s strange that you two don’t know each other better, actually— as the social chairs of your sorority and his fraternity, respectively, you would usually have a lot to work on together. But this year has been particularly busy for you, what with your senior thesis and your various things with Jake’s frat brothers, and you had delegated most of your social chair responsibilities to your co-chair, Yunjin, who was far better suited to the social part of the job, anyways. You suspected Jay had done the same thing, since the two of you only ever texted to confirm budgets for any joint events.

“You need to have more than one-and-three-quarters of an apple for dinner,” Chan scolds you, parental instincts back in full force.

You shrug, about to turn around and rifle through the cabinets to see if you can find some peanut butter to add to your apple slices when a takeout container appears in front of you. Tired and still starving, you react rather slowly, your eyes tracing up the hand on the container to the veins of an arm belonging to none other than Jay.

“You look hungry,” is all he says, before popping the container open for you and rearranging the rest of the plastic bags on the counter. “Jake, tell the others to come down for food.”

The others means that soon, there will be an influx of hungry frat brothers in the kitchen, and you have no desire to be anywhere near that, so you mumble a quick thank you to Jay, plop the rest of the apple slices into the takeout container (against Chan’s complaints about the contamination), and move to leave the kitchen, eager to be on your way to your sorority house.

The last thing you overhear before you leave is Jay asking, “Why did your sister look so nice?”, and Jake and Chan responding in unison, “She had a thing.”

A few days later, when they’re doing work in the library, Jay asks Jake, “So how long have Mark and your sister been seeing each other?”

Jake’s pencil jerks across his graph paper, a jagged line appearing on the page at the same time that he swears. “Dude, what the fuck?”

“Dude, what the fuck,” Jay echoes flatly. “Didn’t you say she had a thing with Mark?”

Jake blinks. “Well, sure, in the same way that she’s had a thing with Chan, and Yeonjun, and Vernon, and all the others.”

Jay gapes at him. “Your sister dated all of them? And all the others?”

“What, no, she didn’t date them, she fake-dated them! Just a couple of times, mainly showing up to things with their families so their parents would leave them alone about finding a partner and all that. You know how the parents are.” Jake gestures vaguely, referring to the oddities of the world of wealth they were born into. 

Jay nods slowly, understanding dawning upon him. Does he know how the parents are? Oh, does he ever. He has always had a good relationship with his own, but they had been more pushy on the whole love thing as of late, with the not-at-all subtle questions his mother asks about any special someones in his life and the unfunny jokes his dad cracks about how he’s still spry enough to help raise grandchildren. Especially unfunny, given the health scare his dad had given them all in the last year.

Jake’s voice brings him out of his veering-towards-morbid thoughts. “But seriously, bro, how is this news to you? My sister’s been doing this… Cinderella-genie thing for two years now.” 

Jay’s eyebrows furrow. “Cinderella-genie thing?”

“Yeah, I mean, she transforms our frat brothers into respectable young men with a respectable relationship, but only for three occasions, and she gets the same number of favors back.” Jake wrinkles his nose. “It sounds weird when I say it like that, and don’t get me wrong, I love to give her shit for it, but it’s all above-board stuff. Sunghoon bought her bubble tea for like, three months. Oh, and no one’s allowed to catch feelings, so everything ends clean and neat.”

“She fake-dated Sunghoon?”

At the mention of his name, Sunghoon pops one side of his headphones off. “What’s up?”

“You fake-dated Jake’s sister!?”

Sunghoon shushes him before responding. “Yeah, don’t you remember? It was a couple of months ago.”

Jay’s ears flush, both at how loud he had unconsciously gotten, and at the reminder that he really has been out of it for a while now. It’s not like he’s been living under a rock, but he has definitely been spending a lot more time with his parents and away from his friends ever since his dad’s health scare.

“She was great, though,” Sunghoon continues. “My mom still thinks I made the biggest mistake of my life ‘letting her go.’ But she’s also been leaving me alone about ‘finding love’ because she thinks I’m heartbroken, so yeah, Jake’s sister works wonders.”

Jake smirks. “Sim genes, man. Elite stuff.” 

Sunghoon scoffs. “You wish. Didn’t I hear your mom yelling at you on the phone the other day for not having settled down yet?”

“Ugh, don’t remind me. Does she not realize what decade this is, I mean, we’re still in college—”

Jay interrupts what looks to be the beginning of a long rant from Jake, cutting him off with, “So where can I sign up?”

Jake stares blankly at him. “Sign up for what?” 

“The Cinderella-genie thing.”

Sunghoon scrunches his face awkwardly. “Uh, she kind of has a waitlist, buddy.”

Jay waits for him to laugh and say he’s just kidding, but he doesn’t. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah, she doesn’t do the fake-dating thing for multiple people at the same time, and she’s pretty busy with all her shit, so I’m not sure how long of a queue you have ahead of you…”

“Okay, but Jake could get me ahead, right? Cut the line, or something? C’mon dude, I’m your best friend.” Jay is suddenly desperate, remembering the conversation he’d had with his mom on the phone last night, where she had dreamily recalled meeting his dad in college and delicately reminded Jay that he could have a plus-one to the Parks’ upcoming 50th wedding anniversary celebration.

Jake eyes his friend warily. “I dunno, she really doesn’t like stuff like that. Unfair advantages, I mean.”

“My parents aren’t getting any younger, Jake, and you know, with my dad last year and everything…” Jay does his best approximation of batting his eyelashes at Jake. 

“Are you guilt-tripping me?”

“A little?” Jay’s smile turns a little maniacal. “For real, my parents have their 50th wedding anniversary coming up, and it would be the perfect event to bring her to so I can reassure them that things are going well in my love life.”

“Are things going anywhere in your love life?” Sunghoon’s tone is skeptical, and reasonably so. 

Jay has been distant lately because of his family, but even before that, he had always been known as somewhat aloof and unattainable. Devastatingly handsome, yes, with killer grades and fierce ambition, and a business empire to inherit to boot, but he is also his parents’ one and only miracle child, born after years of trying and almost giving up. Jay’s parents are older than all of his friends’ parents, and their family business has always been that— a family business. Jay has two years after graduation to learn the ropes in the business, and then he’ll be due for an MBA, and then a return to helm the business, but this timeline has recently felt more urgent than ever with his parents’ flagging health. They would never say it, but he knows the only reason they haven’t retired yet is because they don’t want to hand over control of the business to anyone but him. Jay has worked his ass off in college, trying to get there as fast as he can, as well as he can. But his parents also want him to enjoy college and find true love, and while he’s been doing pretty well with the former, the latter has been on the backburner for, well, forever. Who has time for true love, in between classes, fraternity duties, the various shenanigans his friends get up to, internships, networking, TA-ing, volunteering, being on the executive board of two clubs, and eating, sleeping, dreaming, and thinking?

So. No. Things are not going anywhere in his love life, and he confirms just as much to Sunghoon with a grunt, to which Sunghoon wheezes out his amusement.

Jake eyes Jay with pity, now. “Alright, that guilt trip was successful, but more so because you just admitted to being bitchless for so long. I’ll put in a good word to my sister for you.”

Jay perks up instantly. There is light and beauty in this world after all! “Awesome, thank you bro, you won’t regret this, I promise!”

“I wasn’t planning on it, but those are famous last words, Park.” Jake raises an eyebrow at him. “Are you sure you can handle my sister?”

“Why not? She seems… nice.” Jay is slightly evasive in his answer, and truthfully, it’s because he isn’t really sure what you’re like. All your interactions to date have been cordial, almost business-like, and you and Jake are fraternal twins, so it’s not even like he’s really familiar with what you look like. He is, however, sure that you look beautiful in a ballgown, even if he only saw you in one in his frat’s kitchen.

Jake chortles outright. “No, my sister is not nice. Yeah, I’m definitely going to convince her to help you, just because I think it’ll be hysterical watching her turn you inside out. Good luck, my brother in Christ, because you’ll need it!”

you: hey jake told me abt ur predicament

jay: … good morning, how are you? i’m pretty good myself

you: ???

jay: just being polite. and it’s not a predicament i’m just… interested in your services

you: good for you? anyways i’m super busy right now and don’t really have time to be taking on anything else so i’m just letting you know that i can’t help you out. good luck though

jay: how about coffee?

you: what?

jay: do you want coffee?

you: like right now?

jay: yeah i’m on your porch

You almost throw your phone to the other side of the room. True, Jay’s fraternity house is across the street from your sorority house, but it still feels absurd to think that he’s right there, less than twenty feet below your room. Is he stalking you?

Accordingly, that’s the first thing you ask him when you throw the door open to him. “Are you stalking me?”

He scoffs. “As if. I asked Jake to ask Yunjin for your location.” 

“That’s not not stalking.”

Jay shrugs, though he has the decency to look a little embarrassed as he shoves his hands in his pockets. “Whatever. I just walked across the street; that’s all. So, coffee?”

You stare at him for a few moments, weighing your options. Truthfully, you were about to leave to get coffee before your first class, anyways, but you’re not sure how long you want to entertain Jay. You decide to split the difference. “I’m on my way to Nat’s, so you can tag along. But I’m just grabbing a coffee to go, and then I have class.”

“Okay, let’s go.” 

“Gimme a second; I’ll grab my stuff.” For some reason, your heart is beating a little faster than usual when you reach your room. You’d like to blame it on the stairs you just climbed, but something about Jay coming to find you at your front door feels old-fashioned and sweet, though your rational mind reminds you that he literally just walked a couple hundred feet. He even said so, himself.

But when you come back down to see him leaning against the doorway with his hands still in his pockets, looking out into the street, you suddenly remember that Jay is, like, really good-looking. Despite yourself, you find yourself admiring the cut of his jaw and how nice his hair is styled. It’s not like you don’t know plenty of attractive guys— hell, the guys you usually fake-date are all objectively hot. It’s just inconvenient that you now recall how Jay has always seemed to be the most mature out of Jake’s friends, even from what little you know of him. Unhelpfully, your brain also conjures up the image of him sliding a takeout container to you last week, and the way your eyes had lingered on the veins of his arm.

God. It’s been too long since you’ve gotten laid.

Jay’s voice breaks you out of your bizarre trance. “Ready, Cinderella?”

“Excuse me?”

“Jake told me about your whole Cinderella-genie thing. It would be weird to call you ‘genie’, so…” Jay trails off, scratching the back of his head and looking actually embarrassed now. 

You can’t help but laugh. “Right, because Cinderella is totally less weird. Alright, big guy, let’s go.”

The walk to Nat’s, your favorite local coffee shop, takes about 15 minutes— 10, if you’re walking fast, which you usually are. Jay’s legs are uselessly long, but he seems determined to walk as slowly as possible, while also staying silent the whole time. Finally, you reach the end of your patience and step out right in front of him, intending to ask him what the hell he’s doing. Unfortunately, you find that you misjudged the distance, and he almost collides right into you.

“Whoa,” he mutters, reaching out to grab your arms to steady the both of you. 

“Sorry,” you huff, embarrassed at yourself. A lot of that going around today. “I just… what’s your deal? I already told you I can’t help you, and then you show up at my door and ask me to get coffee, but you don’t say a single word. What do you want from me?”

Instead of answering your question, he asks, “Why do you do it?” 

“Do what?”

“The Cinderella-genie thing.”

You roll your eyes. “Jake has got to stop calling it that. It’s a long story, honestly.” Sighing, you reach into your backpack to pull out your planner. “Alright, we’re already past the amount of time I scheduled to get my coffee and get ahead on some readings before class, so I guess we can sit down inside.”

Jay raises an eyebrow. “You have time for me now? Also, that’s the most insane planner I’ve ever seen.”

You gesture around you. You had stopped Jay almost at the door of Nat’s, and you’re clogging up the sidewalk. “We should at least get out of the way of these people. And yeah, I’m sure it is.” You are a live-and-die-by-your-planner kind of person. Everything is in there— social events, studying time, your various things with Jay’s frat brothers, even things like eating and showering and sleeping. It seems psychotic, sure, but you’re a busy person, and there’s no way you’d be able to handle everything without the strict schedule you set for yourself.

When you walk up to the counter inside Nat’s, your favorite barista— a cute high school kid named Riki— is manning the register. You smile warmly at him. “Hey, Riki. The usual, please.”

You expect Riki to tease you about your usual, which contains an admittedly concerning amount of caffeine, but instead he calls out, “Jay! What’s up, my man!”

From behind you, Jay reaches out and fist-bumps Riki. “Hey, long time no see, buddy. How’s history going?”

Riki groans theatrically. “Horribly, ever since you stopped tutoring me.”

Jay frowns. “Wait, really? What are you having trouble with? I know I’m kind of swamped right now but we can always find some time and—”

Riki bursts out laughing. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding! Jeez, you should’ve seen your face. Relax, I got a 94 on my last paper!”

“Oh, very funny, you menace!” Jay punches Riki’s shoulder, but his expression eases up. You wonder at the fondness that twinkles in his eyes. 

Riki laughs some more, then he turns to you. “Noona, one cup of liquid death coming up! Hyung, what about you?”

“London fog, please. And seriously, text me if you’re having trouble, okay?”

Riki waves the both of you off, telling you that he’ll bring your drinks over to you. 

You make a beeline for your favorite spot, right by the large window that overlooks the sidewalk. Jay surprises you for the umpteenth time that morning by easily striding ahead and pulling your chair out for you, then coughing and turning red when you give him a weird look.

“Sorry, I, uh, yeah. Instinct,” he explains, which is really no explanation at all. 

“Are you courting me or something?” You try to keep your tone light and joking, but confusion inevitably slips in. Nothing Jay has done today has made sense. 

He seems to have regained his composure when he sits down, because he hits you with, “I guess you could say that. It’s just something I think I’d do for my girlfriend.”

You stare at him blankly. “Thanks for telling me…?”

“I mean, if you’re going to fake-date me, you can probably expect me to do stuff like that, right?”

You groan. “I’m not going to fake-date you, Jay, how many times do I have to say it? I—”

“— don’t have time, I know. But what if I could make it worth your while?”

“Jay, you know I’m Jake’s sister, right? We have money. Besides, I’m helping Mark right now, and I don’t do this for multiple people at the same time.”

“Oh yeah, Jake told me about that rule. What if I could take care of that for you?”

You raise an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“I’ll help Mark find a real girlfriend, and then you can help me, instead.”

“If it were that easy, don’t you think Mark would have done it himself?” 

Jay waves his hand dismissively. “Oh, please, Mark’s been crushing on the girl in his music class for ages. He gets too into his head about asking her out, so he chickens out every time. They’re partners on a project right now, though, so I’ll just give him a push in the right direction.”

You have to admit that you’re intrigued by his proposition. Everything Jay just said lines up with what you know about Mark, especially the chickening out part. You’d like to see Jay try, and you figure it can’t hurt either way, so you nod. “Okay, fine. If you can help Mark, I’ll help you. But seriously, what’s your deal? Why do you want my help so badly?”

Jay blinks, then he leans back into his chair. “Oh. Honestly, I haven’t 100% decided that I do, yet.”

“But you’re willing to agree to help Mark Lee with a girl in order to secure my help?” You shake your head. “You’re really strange, Park.”

“I get overly invested in challenges really easily,” Jay confesses, showing you an unexpectedly bashful smile. “So I got a little caught up just now in the idea that I could change your mind about helping me. But now that you’ve brought it up, I’ll still help Mark, no matter what. I’m sick of him writing lovesick songs about that girl, anyways.”

“Large iced Americano, no water, four shots of espresso. And a London Fog,” Riki announces. He sets the drinks down on your table right as the bell above the shop’s door chimes and lets in the pre-9am work crowd. He groans and bids you both a hasty goodbye.

Jay eyes your coffee with disgust. “Liquid death, huh? That’s disturbing.”

“Hey, don’t knock it ‘til you try it.” You tilt the cup in his direction, laughing when he shudders. 

“Absolutely not. I can’t believe you order that enough that Riki knows it’s your usual.”

“I usually see him in the afternoons when I order this, actually, so I’m sure he’s going to give me an earful about getting one in the mornings, too. Speaking of— doesn’t he have school?” You whip around in your seat to stare at Riki. 

“He has two free periods on Mondays this year, so I guess he picked up an extra shift. He’s a hard working kid,” Jay says. 

You turn back around to see him with that same fondness in his eyes. “How do you know him, by the way?”

“Ah, he’s my little’s friend from high school. My little is Jungwon— cat-looking dude?”

You let out a squeal. “Oh my gosh, he’s the cutest!” 

Jay crosses his arms and grins, looking amused. “Yeah, he is pretty cute. Anyways, Jungwon mentioned his friend was having trouble with his history class last year, so I started tutoring him a bit, just casually, since I’m studying history.”

“Not economics?” You’ve heard about Jay’s family’s notoriously tightly-controlled company. Everything is within the family, so you’re surprised that he isn’t getting ready to take over. 

“Both. I can have two majors, you know. What’s yours?”

“Linguistic anthropology. And studio art. I can have two majors, you know.” 

Jay rolls his eyes. “Okay, okay, I know that was pretentious. What’s linguistic anthropology?”

You clear your throat, not expecting to talk about your hopes and dreams so early in the morning, and with someone who’s only a few steps away from being a stranger. “Languages, and the social and cultural foundations of them. Basically. I want to do linguistic archaeology in grad school, and this is the closest thing you can get in undergrad.”

Jay leans forward and nods enthusiastically. “That sounds really cool. What kind of art are you doing?”

“Oil paints, mostly, and some charcoal drawing…”

Like that, an hour flies by. You don’t even notice the blocks in your calendar getting overwritten by what is essentially a coffee date with Jay until you get the reminder that you have class in thirty minutes. 

“Shit, I gotta go soon.” You say it with some regret; surprisingly, you’re really enjoying yourself with Jay. He’s smart, and funny, and a little awkward in a way that makes you think he’s the most sincere person you’ve ever met. And he has interesting thoughts and opinions on history, some of which you even make a mental note to follow up on later for your thesis. 

“Before you go, will you tell me why you do the fake-dating thing?” Jay puts his head in both his hands and smiles at you, and…

“Are you batting your eyelashes at me?”

Jay squints at you. “Maybe. Is it working?”

“Not really,” you lie, like a liar. 

“Didn’t work on Jake, either. Man, I gotta work on it.” Jay gives up the act and relaxes back into his chair. “Will you tell me, though?”

“Sure, it’s not like it’s a big secret or anything. It’s not even that long of a story, now that I think about it. Not something worth trying to seduce me over, but I like your hustle,” you joke. 

“So it was working!”

“I wouldn’t go that far. Okay, so it started with Chan. He just didn’t want to go to his horrible cousin’s horrible wedding, but his sister had been arguing with the cousin about Chan and was, like, defending his honor or something? And one thing spiraled into another and all of a sudden Chan needed to show up to the wedding with an impressive partner to prove to his cousin that he could pull.” You make a face. “Boys. I’d actually met this particular cousin before, through some convoluted situation at one of those holiday parties that our families throw, and I knew he was insufferable, so I was willing to help out. Other guys in the frat heard about it, and you know, it’s surprising but not shocking that your frat has a lot of guys with some sort of weird baggage that prevents them from actually seriously dating someone. It’s weirder that a significant number of them also find themselves in situations where they need to pretend to have a girlfriend, but as it turns out, I’m really good at it— being a fake girlfriend, I guess. I haven’t had much time to date myself, so it’s kind of nice hearing how much everyone’s families liked me as their potential daughter-in-law. Plus, I always get favors in return, so it’s not the worst thing in the world. It’s like the fun part of dating, without the actual time commitment.”

Jay looks skeptical. “Going to family events and schmoozing with distant relatives is the fun part of dating?”

You scoff. “Whatever. You’re the one who asked why I did it, and I told you. It doesn’t have to make sense to you.”

“Sorry, sorry. I’m not judging, I swear. I just think that there’s probably better parts to dating, but who am I to talk,” he mutters.

“Ah, yes, Jake mentioned that, too. Bitchless all these years?”

Jay deadpans at you. “I know you aren’t making fun of me for that when you basically just told me that you fake-dated all these guys because you have a raging praise kink specifically for people’s families.”

“Oh, fuck off.” But you’re laughing, almost— giggling? Ugh. Maybe you do need to back off on the caffeine. “Alright, I have to go now, for real. Text me when Mark is good, and then we can talk about our two fake dates.”

“Isn’t three the max?”

“I was serious about not having time, Jay. I have a thesis for linguistics, and a portfolio to put together for art. Mark was going to be my last… thing this year. I went to one event with him, so if you can get things squared away with him, you can have his other two.”

“Okay, fine. Pleasure doing business with you.” Jay salutes you with two fingers.

“You haven’t even succeeded with Mark yet, and you haven’t heard what favors I want in return, either. Don’t get ahead of yourself, hotshot.” 

And then you’re gone, leaving Jay to ruminate on the last hour and a half you spent together.

Jake’s right— you’re not nice, not in the traditional sense of the word. You’re kind of prickly, and you seem to run your life like a drill sergeant, but Jay thinks you must be really kind. Aside from Chan, the others you’ve helped (Mark, Yeonjun, Vernon, Sunghoon, good lord) are all variants of pretty boys who can’t talk to women to save their lives but live and die by the words of their parents, who all hope to see them get married sooner rather than later (Jay elects to ignore how he fits into that mold pretty well, too). No wonder you felt bad for them in their plights and wanted to help them; and Jay really believes that you did it to help them, not because of whatever favors you got in return. Like you said, you have money, so it’s not like you couldn’t buy your own bubble tea or pay for a driver. No, he’s seen your calendar, and it’s crammed with volunteering events in between everything else, and he’s seen the way you fuss over Riki, someone you only see a couple times a week while ordering a coffee. He’s pretty sure you’re just a classic do-gooder, and he doesn’t even need your help that badly, but he does love a challenge. Get Mark Lee together with the girl of his dreams is the first one. The second one is to figure out why he cares about proving himself to you so much— it’s not like he’s swimming in free time either, but somehow you’ve gotten under his skin, and he wants to see where this goes.

(Plus, he thinks you’re really pretty.)

When you enter your studio art workshop class, you find Yunjin immediately and pout at her. “Thanks for revealing my location to Jay, traitor,” you whine.

Yunjin grins. “It’s not like the sorority house is a state secret, babe. And I have zero regrets— he’s hot!”

“So?”

“So, I’m sick of you fake-dating these guys because you love to be the most helpful person in the room, and I want to see you actually date someone!”

You snort. “Joke’s on you, then, because he also wants to fake-date me.”

“Eugh, really? What the hell, I thought he was a good one,” Yunjin groans.

“He is a good one,” you respond instantly. You’re not sure why you’re so defensive about him, but from everything you’ve witnessed today, you know that Park Jongseong is the definition of a good guy.

“Well, maybe this will finally be the one that goes from fake-dating to real dating!” Yunjing wiggles her eyebrows at you. “You already think he’s nice, and you didn’t say he isn’t hot, either.”

“I have a pulse, Yunjin, I can tell that he’s hot.”

Yunjin whistles between her teeth. “Wait ‘til I tell Jake to tell Jay that.”

“Do not— and since when are you and my brother so close, anyways?”

She flashes you a conspiratorial wink. “New boytoy.”

“Ew, seriously? Jake?”

“Hey, it’s not that deep. He gets around, too, doesn’t he? Friends with benefits, no strings attached, etcetera.”

“Famous last words, honey.” You start pulling out your art supplies, chewing on your lip as you consider whether to ask her what you’re dying to know. “... So, what do you know about Jay? And do not tell Jake about any of this, Yunjin, I swear.”

“We’re really not close like that, babe, and I’d never betray your trust for dick.” Yunjin puts her hand over her heart solemnly.

“I want you to know that I’m throwing up in my mouth.”

“Noted.” Yunjin sticks the pencil she was using in her hair, then leans back and hums thoughtfully. “Now, Jay… I know what everyone knows about him, I guess. Good guy, nice family, kind of detached, if I had to say so? Not in a bad way, though. I just mean that he seems to hang out with his friends and that’s pretty much it. He’s involved in a bunch of stuff on campus like you are, but I know he had to pull back recently because one of his parents had a health thing— oh no, I can tell you’re already Cinderella-ing.”

You huff. “Jake is so annoying for that. What do you mean, Cinderella-ing?”

“You feel bad for him and now you want to help him!”

“I already agreed to help him, if he helps Mark Lee get a girlfriend, first.”

“Wow, he must really need your help if he’s willing to do that.”

“Funny, he said he isn’t sure if he needs my help, yet.” You shrug. “He’s confusing.”

“Oooh, but you’re interested, aren’t you?” Yunjin peers closer at you. “Oh my god, you whore! You want him!” 

“Yunjin!” You shush her, cognizant of the other students around you. “I’m just curious, okay? I wanna know what I’m getting myself into.”

“Sure, sure. I believe you!” Yunjin insists, looking entirely unbelievable. “That’s not surprising about Jay, though. His family is, like, super family-oriented. Introducing them to a fake girlfriend seems like it wouldn’t go well, so it makes sense that he’s hesitant about it. You should ask him for more details when you guys fuck—”

You cut her off with a hand slapped over her mouth. “I’m going to murder you in your sleep.”

Yunjin laughs underneath your hand and flicks you off. “But seriously, the rumor is that he’s never dated anyone in college because his parents had the perfect college romance and want the same thing for him, and he’s always been too busy being the prodigal son and heir apparent for true love to just, like, fall into his lap. Despite the valiant efforts of many girls on campus,” she finishes dryly.

“That’s… a really detailed rumor.”

“Chaewon’s little is obsessed with him, so I’ve heard it a million times.” 

You both cringe. Chaewon is far too nice to say it, but her little is stuck in a phase of boy mania so all-consuming it borders on clinical.

“Enough about boys; how’s it going with the portfolio?” Yunjin nudges her chin towards your empty canvas.

You sigh. “Pretty good, except for the human portrait part. It’s really not my thing, but Professor Song was so adamant that I try to include at least two of them by the end of the year. I did one of Jake already, but he doesn’t know, so it’ll be hilarious to see him cry at the senior showcase.”

“Oh, he’s totally going to lose it,” Yunjin agrees. You stay silent on the curious display of knowledge she just exhibited on your brother’s behalf. “Who are you thinking for the other one?”

“Beats me. I’d use my parents, but that feels a little bit too on the nose, especially after the one of Jake. It’d be weird to ask our friends, right?”

“Not really, but your portfolio theme is family, isn’t it? Very sweet of you to think of us as family, but then you’re talking about an entire group of people.”

Instantly, you shudder. “That’s way more than two humans. Love you guys, but no thanks. I’ll figure something else out.”

Yujin smirks at you. “If you and Jay date and fall in love and get married, you’ll be family, and then you could do one of him.”

“That is so not the solution!”

You don’t hear from Jay until a week later, at which point you figure he has given up, so you’re shocked to find him at your door again. 

“Morning, Cinderella,” is all he says to you before handing you a cup.

“Good morning,” you return, too dumbfounded to say anything else. “What’s this?”

“Coffee. Large iced Americano, no water, four shots of espresso,” he recites. “I got Riki to text it to me,” he admits quickly.

“I appreciate it, but what’s this for?” You narrow your eyes at him. “You can’t possibly think that one of the favors I’ll ask from you is coffee, right? I’m not that easy, Park.”

Jay looks offended. “Hey, you let Sunghoon buy you bubble tea!”

“Yeah, but he was really pathetic about the whole fake-dating thing.”

“... Fine, I’ll give that to you. That does sound like him. But no, this is because I wanted to ask you something, and I figured I’d take up the time that you usually schedule for getting your coffee.”

“Ooookay. So, what’s up?” You start on the walk to the library, and he’s quick to fall into step beside you.

“I’ve been thinking about how to help Mark with his crush, and I have the perfect idea, but I need your help.”

“You need my help to help Mark so that you can get my help for yourself?” It sounds absurd coming out of your month, and before you can stop yourself, you blurt out, “Wow, try saying that ten times fast.”

A surprised laugh erupts from Jay’s chest. “That was corny as hell,” he says, but he’s still laughing, high pitched and delighted. Laughter transforms his whole face, his eyes slipping into crescents and his nose scrunching with the force of his happiness, and you’re left dazed looking at him like that.

“Don’t tell anyone you witnessed that. I know where you live,” you threaten him half-heartedly. It really doesn’t carry much weight when you’re beaming in response to the mirth in his expression.

He stops laughing to grin at you, still bright and lovely. “Yeah, right. Who’s been coming to whose front door?”

“You don’t think I could walk across the street? I’m there all the time, Jay. So many people in that house owe me; it’d be a piece of cake to get your room number.” You say this with a stupid smile still on your face.

“Right, consider me properly frightened.” The wattage of his grin finally turns down a couple of notches, giving you room to breathe properly. “So, about Mark,” he starts.

“Yeah, this just sounds like more work for me,” you respond skeptically.

“Hear me out, okay? Mark has all these love songs written about this girl, and I found out that she always eats lunch at the same table at the same time in the dining hall on Tuesdays, so I figured he could play one of his songs over the dining hall speakers and then confess to her.” Jay makes little jazz hands at the end of his sentence, and it prompts a giggle out of you.

You have to fight your smile down when you speak. “A couple of things. One: that is so incredibly over the top for a confession, but sure, I like your spirit. Two: there’s no way Mark is slick enough to pull this off. Which leads me to three: what do you need from me?”

Jay nods. “Exactly, Mark could never do this on his own, which is why I’ve enlisted a bunch of guys from the frat, and you, of course.”

“Me, of course?”

“Sunoo and Jake are going to sweet-talk the lady at the dining hall who has the keys to the staff office with the dining hall audio hookup and microphone— she loves Sunoo, and Jake will flash her the ol’ puppy dog eyes to keep her sufficiently distracted. Heeseung will walk past and swipe her keys, and Jungwon is going to make sure that Mark’s crush is actually in the dining hall at the right time. Chan is going to apologize on everyone’s behalf if this goes wrong.”

You tut. “Poor Chan.”

“It’s his presidential duty, god bless.”

“And where do I fit into this?”

“You and I need to hold Mark’s hand, figuratively, and keep him hyped up enough to actually go through with it. He agreed to the plan, but I can totally see him chickening out again, which is why Sunghoon and Yeonjun are also going to stand guard outside the staff office so he can’t escape.”

“I feel like you could hold Mark’s hand on your own,” you argue, but you don’t really mean it. This sounds so chaotic and harebrained that you would normally want to stay a mile away from it, but Jay’s enthusiasm and seriousness about it is rubbing off on you. Plus, it would be nice to see one of your fake boyfriends actually succeed in their love life.

“He has two hands, and I can’t hold them all by myself because I have to operate the audio hookup,” Jay proclaims solemnly. “And I said figuratively! He trusts you, clearly, or at least he trusted you enough to be his fake girlfriend.”

“I come highly recommended,” you intone dryly. 

“And he trusts me enough to go along with the plan, so I think we’re the best suited to be his moral support,” Jay continues, ignoring your smartass comment. 

“This is a ridiculous plan, Jay.”

“So you’re in? Oh, wait. Are you free at 12:30 today?”

You stop to check your planner and confirm that you are. “What would you have done if I wasn’t?”

“Reconfigure the time-space continuum so you could be in two places at once. Mark’s future happiness depends on this,” Jay insists.

"I see what you mean about getting overly invested in challenges really easily… Alright, text me where I should meet you later, then?”

“You got it. Have a good day, Cinderella!” He yells this part as he jogs away from you. 

“Stop calling me that!” But you can’t remember the last time you smiled this much this early in the morning.

Hours later, you smile instinctively upon seeing Jay’s name pop up in your notifications.

jay: coast is clear. meet me outside the dining hall staff office in 5 minutes. operation is a go

you: omw, 007

jay: stop ur making me blush

you: fr?

jay: no this is just banter

you: omfg mark just texted me to say that ur actually blushing

jay: im going to end him. after he gets a gf, ofc

“Hey,” you whisper in Jay’s ear, making him jump. 

“Holy shit, how’d you get here so fast?”

You shrug, jostling his shoulder as you’re pressed up against him in the tiny recessed alcove across from the staff office. “I’m a fast walker. Places to be, people to see, you know? Speaking of…” You motion to the open office door. “Should we go inside?”

Jay clears his throat. Up this close, he can count the eyelashes that flutter against your skin. “Yeah, Mark’s already there. I’m surprised he found the composure to pop his head out and see me, or text you, honestly. He’s been a nervous wreck since this morning. Oh, finally, way to be on time, losers!” Jay beckons Sunghoon and Yeonjun closer from down the hall.

“We’re fine; Jungwon says Mark’s crush hasn’t even sat down at her table, yet. Hey, how are you? Long time no see.” Yeonjun flashes you a smile.

“Committing questionable acts in the name of love, you know, just living the dream,” you joke. “How’s your mom?”

“Great! She still asks about you. By the way, if I had known being a little more pathetic would get me this level of commitment,” Yeonjun gestures around him, “I would’ve asked for a real girlfriend, too.”

“I’m told I was pretty pathetic, and even I didn’t get this kind of treatment,” Sunghoon reminds you.

You pat his arm consolingly. “Maybe if you had Jay on your side, buddy.”

“Yeah, what the hell, best friend?” Sunghoon eyes him accusingly.

Jay pats his other arm. “Sorry, I have ulterior motives with Mark.”

“Oh, so now Mark gets a girlfriend and a secret male lover?”

Jay scoffs. “Not those kinds of ulterior motives, but please. As if Mark could bag me.”

“Ladies, ladies, there’s plenty of Jay to go around,” you say placatingly. 

“Guys, I’m freaking out in here!” Mark wails from inside the office.

“Fuck, Jungwon said she’s sitting down now. Go!” Yeonjun pushes you and Jay towards the office.

In quick order, Jay gets the audio hooked up to Mark’s laptop, and he starts the song. While Mark hyperventilates between the two of you and you actually do share in the holding of his hands, Jay finds himself staring at you as you try to encourage Mark. You really are quite kind— he doesn’t think many people would have agreed to be dragged into this silly scheme, but here you are, throwing yourself into it wholeheartedly because there’s a chance it might secure Mark’s future happiness. 

The sun reaches its highest point in the sky just then, streaming in through the windows behind you and drenching you in golden light. Jay’s not sure if he’s nervous about getting in trouble for this or if he’s just been looking at you for too long, but he can feel his heart stuttering in his chest. It’s positively outrageous how pretty you are.

“Bro, what the fuck do I say?” Mark hisses, interrupting Jay’s very important investigation of the color of your eyes. “The song is almost over, please, you gotta help me!”

“Just tell her how you feel,” Jay offers. It’s not his best attempt at advice, but he’s distracted by the way your hair brushes against your neck. 

Mark splutters and fumbles and curses under his breath, but then the song is over, and Jay is turning on the microphone for him to speak. “Um, hey, so, yeah! Yeah. Uh, I’ve liked you for a long time… which you can probably tell, because of the song and everything.” Mark giggles nervously. “There’s, like, at least five more where that came from. Because I like you a lot, but I’m not great at talking in person, so I wrote all these songs, and oh god, this is super weird, isn’t it? I’m sorry if it’s weird, I just, well, I wanted to tell you. What I feel for you is so big I think I might explode; it makes me lose my mind and my breath and my ability to speak, and it leads me to do stupid stuff like this. And now you know. Okay, cool!” Mark reaches over and slams his hand to turn off the microphone. 

You and Jay share an exasperated look over Mark’s head.

“Mark, you didn’t even say who the song is for,” you remind him. 

He pales. “I didn’t?”

“Or who it’s from, but I think that part is pretty obvious,” Jay sighs. “Just text her right now, and tell her it was from you, and ask her out!”

“What? No, I can’t do that, I think I’m gonna be sick,” Mark moans.

You roll your eyes. “Mark, do it right now, or I’m telling your mom you cheated on me.”

“What? But I didn’t! And we weren’t even dating for real! And I just told her we broke up!”

“Right, I’ll say we broke up because you cheated on me.” You stare him down. “Seriously, I’ll call her tonight.”

“Nonono, I’ll text Mina, okay? See, I’m texting her right now.” Mark pulls out his phone and types frantically. 

Jay throws his arm around Mark’s shoulder, using the leverage to hit the send button on his phone. “See, that wasn’t so hard!”

“I need to go walk into traffic,” Mark declares. 

You smile breezily at him. “Sure, whatever. Love conquers all!” Behind his back, you and Jay high-five.

Jay says you should have dinner to celebrate Mark and Mina’s new romance (ignoring Mark’s pained “What romance? I’m dying.”), but you tell him that you’re volunteering at the community kitchen that night. Jay doesn’t miss a beat. “Sure, I’ll be there. We should talk about my thing, anyways.”

That’s how he finds himself in a hairnet and disposable gloves that night, making funny faces at the head of the community kitchen’s daughter, who’s running around underfoot. He’s been put in charge of chopping vegetables, while you’re stirring a huge pot of stew at one of the stoves.

“Watch your fingers,” you scold him half-heartedly. He’s devastatingly cute like this.

He has the audacity to wink at you. “I know my way around a kitchen, don’t worry.”

“Very cool, trophy husband.”

“What, no more 007?”

“Depends on the outcome of Mark’s text to Mina. Did you hear anything from him?”

Jay scoops up his vegetables into a large bowl and brings it over to you, nudging you aside with his hip so he can add the vegetables to your pot. “Not yet, but I don’t have him freaking out in my messages either, so I’ll take that as a win.”

You let him take over the stirring and turn around to lean against the countertop. “Cute hairnet,” you quip.

“Thanks. You think they’ll let me take it home?” he jokes. 

You nudge your chin in the direction of the little girl giggling at Jay. “I think she wants to take you home.”

He winks at her, then lowers his voice so that only you can hear him say, “She’ll have to get in line.”

You swallow and wonder if the stove is turned on too high. “Right, so what’s your thing about?”

“Later, yeah?” Jay gestures around you, and you suddenly remember that you’re in the middle of a busy kitchen, with everyone hustling to get ready for the dinner service starting in half an hour. 

You spring into action again, embarrassed at how easily you’d been absorbed into conversation with Jay. Something about the way he talks to you makes you feel like you’re the only person in the world— he’s always so attentive, nodding and responding to your every comment. You have to wonder why he hasn’t dated anyone seriously in college; he seems like he’d be the dream boyfriend. Hypothetically.

He only proves this point further when he reveals two containers of mac and cheese that he had picked up before getting there, which he microwaves for the two of you to eat after the dinner service is over. You turn on the lights in one corner of the cafeteria and sit at the only table that’s still left out: a children’s table where you have to balance precariously on seats that are too small for you. But it’s entirely worth it, knocking knees and elbows together, laughing too hard for what the situation warrants.

“I would’ve made you something myself, but I didn’t want to use up the kitchen’s ingredients,” Jay comments off-handedly.

Your heart glows in your chest. “That’s really thoughtful, Jay.”

He smiles and scratches the back of his head, suddenly shy. “Nah, it’s common sense, right? Come on, eat before it gets cold.”

Right then and there, Jay learns that he loves to watch you eat. You make exaggerated faces and ooh and ahh over something as simple as mac and cheese from the 24-hour diner down the street, and he finds himself itching to make something with his own two hands that will make you react like that. 

When you’re done eating, you sit back and sigh in satisfaction. “That was exactly what I needed. Now, tell me about your thing— what kind of mess have I gotten myself into?”

Jay hems and haws for a good minute before finally telling you about his parents’ upcoming 50th wedding anniversary. “It’s a little complicated because they had this, like, fairytale relationship, and of course I’m happy that they’re still so in love all these years later, but it’s kind of… a lot to live up to. Not that I’m complaining, because they’re awesome, but I don’t have that kind of relationship with anyone yet, so I haven’t brought anyone home to them.”

“So the rumors are true,” you mutter under your breath.

Unfortunately, Jay seems to have heard you. “What rumors?”

Flushing, you explain what you’d heard from Yunjin, who had heard it from Chaewon’s little. You’re quick to add, “I wasn’t asking around about you or anything!” 

Jay just smirks at you, something wicked and slow that only contributes to the heat in your cheeks. “I didn’t say anything.”

You hesitate before speaking up again. “So, if you don’t mind me asking… How come you haven’t dated anyone long-term in college? You’re, you know, perfectly okay to look at.”

Jay deadpans at you. “Wow, thanks, that really means a lot to me.”

You let out a huff of a laugh. “Shut up, it’s not a secret that you’re hot.”

Jay’s eyebrows shoot up, and you swear to god, he blushes to high heaven. “Th-Thanks.”

“Mm.”

It’s silent for a few long moments, then Jay clears his throat. “If I’m being honest, I haven’t dated anyone long-term in college because my parent’s relationship is a lot to live up to, and it’s not like I have a ton of time to find my perfect life partner in between everything else.”

“Ugh, tell me about it. Yunjin tells me I should try actually dating again, but it’s kind of a lot, right? Putting in the time and effort to get to know someone from scratch, when you’re not even sure how it’s going to pan out? And you’ve seen my calendar.” You laugh quietly. “And, honestly, I have this problem with dating where I get bored pretty easily.”

Jay leans forward, pushing into your personal space close enough to count your eyelashes, again. “Are you bored right now?” 

“No,” you answer, although you’re not sure why he’s asking. “Um, so, why do you need a fake girlfriend, then? I don’t think it’ll pass muster with your parents, if they want you to be in love for real.”

Jay fidgets with his fingers on top of the table. “Yeah, it’s kind of stupid, to be honest. My dad was hospitalized for a month last year, and it really shook us all. My parents are on the older side, and I’m their only child, and, well, I’d like to make them happy while they’re still around. Sorry, that was morbid. And I know it’s not like we’d be doing this forever, and it’s wrong to fake it, but still. They’d be overjoyed to see me in a relationship. I want to give that to them, even if it’s only twice.” He tells it to you like it’s a secret, and your chest caves in with the force of his sincerity.

“I don’t think that’s stupid. It’s sweet, Jay, really.” You reach out and still his fingers. “Listen, you know I’m really good at being a fake girlfriend, right?”

“You come highly recommended,” he mimics you from earlier, mouth quirking up in the beginnings of a smile. It lifts the atmosphere slightly, and you’re glad for it.

“Right, so don’t worry. Leave it to me. Your parents won’t suspect a thing,” you promise. “When’s the anniversary celebration?”

“Six weeks.”

You pull out your planner to start scheduling. “Great, so you can send me information about yourself, and I’ll do the same for you, and then we can find time to meet up and quiz each other about it and get our answers on our relationship straight—”

Jay’s hand lands around your wrist, stopping you from writing further. “Not that I don’t appreciate your… efficiency, but I don’t think that’s going to work. Like you said, my parents want to see a true relationship, and I don’t think flashcards are going to cut it. How about we just… get to know each other?”

You blink. “What, like daily one-on-ones, or something? Office hours, but just for each other?”

He bursts out laughing. “Oh my god, you’re serious, aren’t you?” He lets go of your wrist to hide his face behind his hands as he continues to laugh, which makes you smile despite yourself. He’s so goddamn cute.

You decide to humor him. “What do you suggest, then?”

“As much as I would love to monopolize your time, I don’t actually want to take up any of the precious few free spots on your calendar. You need to set aside more time for yourself, by the way. But for now, how about you give me the thirty minutes you schedule for getting to Nat’s and then back to campus every day? We can get to know each other then.”

“You want to walk me to the coffee shop and back?”

“Among other things.”

“… Such as?”

“Just you wait, Cinderella. I’m going to sweep you off your feet so hard, you won’t know what hit you. I’ll be the best fake boyfriend you’ve ever had.”

In the dim light of the after-hours cafeteria, with his long legs stretched out on either side of yours and the soft crescents of his smiling eyes twinkling at you, you’re inclined to believe him.

Jay keeps his word. He shows up on the sorority house’s porch every morning, backpack slung over his shoulder and hands in his pockets at 7:45am. He doesn’t even have class until 11am (you know because you asked Yunjin to ask Jake), so his dedication impresses you. Sometimes, you’ll watch him approach the house from your window, bopping his head along to whatever he’s listening to in his earbuds. 

When you open the door to greet him, he always smiles sleepily at you and reaches out to grab whatever’s in your hands (usually art supplies or heavy reference books for your thesis). It’s a small gesture, but it shoots through your cotton-candy-soft heart as true and straight as an arrow.

Most mornings, the two of you will chat about anything and everything, swinging from homework to Greek life drama to pet peeves to Mesopotamian history. Occasionally, you’re both tired from your busy schedules and just end up sharing his earbuds, listening to something slow and soothing. More and more often, you find yourself stuffing supplies and books into your backpack until it’s grossly misshapen, just so Jay can have his hands free to brush against yours on the walk to Nat’s.

It’s not just the coffee shop, either. Suddenly, he’s everywhere in your life, as if someone had penciled in his name as one long continuous block in your calendar. He comes to the library with you, and you work on your assignments in companionable silence. He’s now a regular volunteer at the community kitchen, and he’s helping them design a new menu for the colder days coming soon. He even shows up outside the studio art workshop, bringing you takeout when you’ve forgotten to eat. At parties, the two of you dominate beer pong, with him bouncing balls off of his bicep into the cups just to make you fake your fawning adoration at him. He doesn’t have to know that it comes easily to you, especially when he’s constantly looking at you the way you know you look at beautiful works of art.

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were actually courting me,” you comment thoughtlessly one day. You’re perched on the kitchen counter at the frat, watching Jay make ramen for the two of you. It’s almost three in the morning, and neither of you should be awake, but there’s something special about the quiet privacy afforded by the strange hour.

Jay forces himself to keep stirring the pot like usual. If he’s being honest with himself, he doesn’t know any better, either, but he doesn’t want to look too closely into that at the moment. Instead, he opts to flirt. “Wouldn’t you like to know,” he murmurs.

“Yeah, that’s why I said it, smartass.” But you let him off the hook, now preoccupied with reaching over to re-tie his apron.

“Ooh, ramen!” Jungwon’s face lights up as he walks into the kitchen, led by his nose. He looks like he just woke up, rubbing at his eyes with the ends of his sweatshirt sleeves. You have to stop yourself from cooing at him.

“What are you doing up so late?” Jay scolds him gently.

“Oh, hey, Dad. Hey, Mom. I just woke up; I had a weird dream.” Jungwon nods at you both and takes a seat at the kitchen island.

You gape at him. “What?”

Jungwon blinks a couple of times, looking more alert by the second. “Oops. Did I say that out loud? Sorry, Niki’s been rubbing off on me.”

“Niki calls us Mom and Dad?” You’re not sure if that’s sweet or weird.

“As a joke! In a jocular manner. Jovially.” Jungwon throws up a peace sign, as if that helps.

“I’m glad to see the English degree is paying off,” Jay remarks dryly. He looks like he took the Mom-and-Dad thing much more in stride, except for the tips of his ears, which burn red. It’s a dead giveaway that makes you smile fondly, because it’s so him.

“Will you make some more ramen?” Jungwon bats his eyelashes at the two of you.

“See, it works much better when Jungwon does it,” you tease Jay.

“Can’t argue with you there, honestly.” Jay puts another pot of water on the stove to boil. “You should have more than just sodium and carbs, though,” he tells Jungwon.

You nod, hopping off of the counter to rummage through the fridge. “Yeah, you don’t eat enough vegetables. Maybe that’s why you’re having weird dreams. Aha!” You emerge triumphantly with a salad kit.

Jungwon laughs. “And you wonder why Niki calls you Mom and Dad.”

Jay scoffs. “That’s just because he hasn’t met Chan.”

“Fair enough. What are you guys doing here so late, anyways?”

You pause in assembling the salad to point a salad tong at Jay. “This guy just follows me everywhere.”

“We’re in my frat house,” Jay retorts. 

“I could be here for someone else,” you argue. 

Jay’s gaze pins you down, warm and earnest. “You’re not, though.”

You smile at him. “No, I’m not.”

Jungwon coughs. “Get a room.”

You reach over to ruffle his hair. “You’re standing in it.”

The three of you eat your ramen and salad in silence for a bit, all falling victim to varying degrees of sleepiness. Without noticing it, you’re scooched up next to Jay, shoulders and knees and ankles pressed together in one long line of comfortable intimacy.

Jay thinks about Jungwon’s question as he slurps at the noodles. What are you guys doing here so late? The answer almost eludes him. These days, he finds himself drawn to you like a magnet, pulled in by forces far stronger than himself. 

He remembers that the two of you had been doing work in his room after the main library had closed, and you had fallen asleep on his bed at some point, a sketchbook dangling from your fingers. He had spent a ridiculous amount of time admiring your sleeping form, indulging in his favorite pastime of counting your eyelashes and resisting the urge to lay beside you. Eventually, your stomach had woken you up, and he insisted on making you some food, even if it wasn’t as nice as he would have liked to do for you. Now, looking at you chatting and joking with Jungwon, Jay feels his heart expanding into his lungs. You fit into his life so perfectly, and he’d like to think that he fits into yours, too. It’s almost too good to be true— could this be what his parents started with? 

When you’re done eating, Jungwon waves the two of you away, insisting that he should do the dishes since you cooked. You’re not about to argue with that, so you pat him on the shoulder before following Jay back up to his room. 

“He’s a good kid,” you tell Jay as you hop on his bed again, grabbing your sketchbook to pick up where you left off.

“He is.” Jay tuts at you. “And you should go to sleep.”

“I will, I will, just let me finish this sketch, okay? Besides, I don’t see you turning your laptop off, either.” You jut your chin out stubbornly.

Jay glances at the Wikipedia rabbit hole he’d been going down before your stomach had growled loudly an hour ago. He’s done with his work for the day, and he had just been keeping you company for the last two hours. “I have super important, time-sensitive work to finish,” he lies solemnly.

“Jay, I can see that you have the Wikipedia page for sinkholes open.”

He slams his laptop shut. “Actually, I’m done,” he declares, flopping down on the bed beside you. He turns his cheek from where he’s level with your stomach to look up at your hands moving across the page. “What are you working on in there?”

You make a displeased face. “People. I have to do one more human portrait for my portfolio, and it’s driving me nuts. Here, this one is of you.”

Jay lifts his head, astonished to see himself reflected back on the page. In smooth, sure strokes, you’ve captured him in tender detail: strong jaw, sharp eyes, and mouth twisted in concentration, probably from earlier when he’d actually been doing work. Jay’s jaw works as he struggles to figure out what to say. He’s unbelievably touched that you would draw him. “Can I keep this?” he asks finally.

“It’s not even done yet. And it’s not that good,” you warn him.

“It is to me. C’mon, please?”

“Maybe when I finish…” You trail off, swayed by the senseless patterns he’s tracing on top of your knee. “Which I won’t, if you keep distracting me.”

He smirks and stills his hand, looking like he’s about to tease you before he interrupts himself with a yawn. “Alright, goodnight, Cinderella.”

“'Night, 007.”

When he wakes up the next morning, he finds the lingering scent of your shampoo and a complete sketch of himself, now decked out in a tux worthy of James Bond. It makes him laugh out loud, and he knows he’s in trouble when he slides out a picture of him with his cousins from a picture frame to put your sketch in the frame, instead.

Before you know it, the day of the Parks’ wedding anniversary celebration has arrived. You’re on a four-way FaceTime call, with Chaewon lounging on your bed as you try on various dresses.

Kazuha is more invested in asking you about your relationship than helping you decide what to wear. “I’m just saying, I think it’s interesting that you and Jay have been, like, glued together for well over a month.”

“We’re getting to know each other better, so we don’t mess up in front of his parents,” you explain for the millionth time.

Kazuha wiggles her eyebrows at you. “Suuuure. Why didn’t you just send him one of those scarily detailed questionnaires like you did with all the other guys you fake-dated?”

Chaewon motions for you to spin in the billowy dress you’re currently in. “Too beachy,” she decides. “But ditto to what Kazuha said.”

“It’s because she like-likes him,” Sakura sing-songs.

You stick your tongue out at her. “Grow up, will you?” 

“Forget about that— have you guys hooked up yet?” Yunjin demands.

“Yet? No, Yunjin, what the fuck,” you complain.

“Gross,” a familiar voice groans from Yunjin’s corner of the FaceTime. You, Kazuha, Sakura, and Chaewon all zero in on her square.

“Jake?” You exclaim.

Yunjin giggles and moves the camera to show Jake sitting at his desk in his room, wearing his nerdy glasses and hunched over a textbook.

“Did you guys just hook up?” Kazuha blurts out. 

“Gross,” you repeat.

Yunjin rolls her eyes. “Grow up, will you? And no, I’m just here because it was too loud at the house.”

The rest of you fall silent on the call, especially you and Chaewon, demonstrating how decidedly not loud it is in the sorority house.

Yunjin blushes and clears her throat. “Whatever. Hey, you should totally wear that sparkly navy velvet number! The one that cinches at your waist.”

You rummage around in your closet and pull out the dress in question to try it on. “This one?”

Sakura whistles. “Oh, for sure. Good eye, Jen.”

Yunjin blows her a kiss. “Of course, of course.” She points at you. “That’s the one, babe. You have, like, the sluttiest waist ever, second only to Sunghoon; you have to wear that.”

Sounds of agreement abound, except from Jake, who whines, “You guys don’t think I have a slutty waist?”

“You’re a whore in other ways, don’t worry,” you reassure him dryly. You do another spin for Chaewon. “This isn’t too much, though?”

Jake suddenly pops into view of the camera. “It’s a formal event, and Jay is going to lose his mind no matter what you wear, trust me.”

“That’s not the point,” you insist.

The girls respond in unison, “Yes, it is!” 

And you have to admit, the way Jay’s mouth stays open as he gives you the once-over a few hours later is gratifying, to say the least. For good measure, he does it again, letting his eyes linger at the dip between your collarbones and the curve of your mouth.

Molten heat spreads through you in response to his wandering eyes, ratcheting up in intensity when he smirks at you, purposeful and knowing.

You elect to check him out, too, knowing that you’re not the only person who can get flustered here. He cuts an unbelievable figure against the setting sun, leaning against his sleek black car, hands in his pockets and legs crossed at the ankles. The tuxedo he wears fits criminally well, emphasizing his broad shoulders and long legs, and you can’t stop yourself from wondering what he’d look like taking his tie off. On second thought, this may have backfired; you only find yourself feeling warmer the longer you stare at him.

Thankfully, he starts moving, coming up to the porch to hand you a bouquet of baby’s breath.

“Oh, good idea— should I hand these to your mom or your dad?” You ask, taking the flowers from him.

He laughs, surprised. You are too cute for his own good. “The flowers are for you, Cinderella. My parents and I are allergic to pollen, actually.”

“Oh.” You hold the flowers closer to your chest, giddiness touching you from head to toe. He got you flowers, even though he’s allergic. “Thank you, Jay.”

He hums and reaches out to tuck a piece of hair behind your ear. “Happy to do it. I saw the flowers in your room dying the other day. Go put them inside; I’ll wait out here. I can feel Chaewon’s stare drilling into the top of my head, anyways.” He looks up and waves at Chaewon, who’s hanging out of your window shamelessly.

She shouts, “Have her home by midnight, or she’ll turn into a pumpkin!”

“I don’t think that’s how it goes, but okay!” He throws her a thumbs-up.

Inside the house, you’re seized with the urge to splash some water on your face, just to calm yourself down, but that would ruin your makeup. Instead, you place the flowers in a vase of water and trust that Chaewon will bring them up to your room for you, after she’s done heckling Jay.

“Leave my guy alone,” you yell in her direction, pulling at his arm to get him down the stairs and to his car. 

“Your guy, huh?” Jay looks at you with uncontrollable fondness.

“Just for the night,” you say, but you don’t miss the way his smile widens at the way you don’t deny it.

Ever the gentleman, Jay opens the passenger door for you, helping you gather the ends of your dress and tucking them in under your legs. He remains crouched for a moment, looking like he’s debating with himself about something, and then he goes for it, leaning over and buckling you in.

When you raise an eyebrow at him, all he says is, “Precious cargo,” and then he’s shutting the door, leaving you flushing once more.

The car ride to his parent’s place is easy and comfortable, even with the charged atmosphere that lingers between the two of you. Conversation always flows like water with Jay; you’re debating the finer points of how to determine provenance for historical artifacts when you arrive. Guests are littered across the front lawn, conversing with each other but centered around his parents.

Suddenly, you’re nervous. “Do you think they’ll like me?” You ask Jay.

He looks at you like you’ve grown another head. “Are you serious? Of course they will. You’re you.”

You swat at his shoulder even as you smile widely. “Your unconditional faith in me notwithstanding, I’m serious, Jay. I want to be able to live up to this fairytale romance thing.”

He takes your hand in his, pressing a kiss to your knuckles. “Believe me, you’re a dream come true. Let’s go, Cinderella.”

You gulp and curse your thundering heart, but then you’re five feet away from his parents, and you’re exclaiming at how in love they look, all these years later. Jay’s dad is distinguished in salt-and-pepper hair, and his mom is all smiles when she tells you that you’re too pretty for Jay.

“Mom,” he whines.

“Oh alright, come here, my beautiful boy.” She brings him in for a hug and beams when he kisses her cheek. Your heart melts like ice cream in the summer; he’s a mama’s boy, through and through.

Jay’s dad asks, “So, how did you meet?” 

You open your mouth, prepared with your story. “I’m Jay’s friend’s twin sister, and then we kind of got caught in a scheme to help one of our other friends ask out the girl he liked, and we just got closer after that. Jay’s easy to like.” So far, it’s all true.

Jay doesn’t look like he’s faking anything when he continues, though. “She’s easy to love.”

“Way to one-up me,” you joke, but you feel like you’re floating, cradled by the buoyancy of the affection in his eyes.

“Seriously, she’s so smart it makes my head spin, and her heart shines brighter than the sun. She makes me laugh and work harder to keep up, and I’m lucky to just stand by her side. Being with her is the most natural thing in the world, like breathing, or my heart beating.” Jay doesn’t take his eyes off of you the whole time he’s speaking; he wants to commit every change in your expression to memory, from surprise to fondness to something deeper.

Jay’s dad hums approvingly. “Good work, son. You sound like I did when I met your mom.” He brings his wife in to kiss her temple.

“Enjoy the party, lovebirds,” she coos at you, and then they’re gone, off to greet other arrivals.

You’re frozen in place, with one hand still clutching at Jay’s like a lifeline. “We didn’t practice that,” you mumble.

He shakes his head and rubs his thumb over your cheek with his other hand. “No, we didn’t. Are you mad?”

“Mad? I think I’m jealous of your future girlfriend,” you say, forcing a laugh. It sounds wooden even to your ears.

He frowns. “Don’t do that.”

“Do what?”

“Act as if you don’t know how much I like you.” 

The world stops turning on its axis. “What?”

His gaze slips down to your mouth, tracing your cupid’s bow. “You heard me.” He turns hopeful eyes on you. “Do you… feel the same?”

Just like that, the world resumes its motion, and you can’t let him go a second longer without knowing how much he is loved. “Desperately.” 

He breathes a sigh of relief, and you think he’s going to kiss you— you need him to kiss you— but he hugs you close instead, lips hovering against your ear. “You have no idea how happy I am to hear that,” he murmurs.

“If it’s anything close to how happy I am, I probably have a good idea,” you laugh. You’re surprised at how quickly the burning urge to have his mouth on yours has tempered into something more grounded and permanent. 

“I have to go do something for my parents, but I think I’ll die if I have to leave you. Will you come watch?” 

You’d go anywhere with him. “Of course.”

He squeezes your hand. “Thanks, doll.” Against your will, your hand spasms in his. He giggles, delighted. “Duly noted.”

“Shut up,” you complain, but you follow him all the way to the tented dance floor set up on the grounds behind the house, only letting go after he kisses each of your fingertips in turn.

You’re surprised to see him pull out an eight-string guitar, and even more surprised when he explains to the gathered crowd that he’ll be playing the song from his parents’ first dance. They look perfect, swaying in the center of the floor, but you only have eyes for Jay.

You watch as his fingers pluck deftly at the strings, a romantic Spanish melody that barely reaches your ears over the rush of all your adoration for him. As soon as the song is over, he catches you in his arms, lifting you up and spinning you around twice before setting you back down, hands at home around your waist.

He asks if you want to dance. You teeter back on your heels, looking at the graceful curve of his mouth and thinking back to the nimbleness of his fingers. “Honestly? I want to kiss you. Really badly.”

He exhales and holds you tighter. “You won’t let me take you out first?”

“If you count the last few weeks, you’ve taken me out, like, a million times.”

“But a real date, doll. I want to cook for you, and we can get tea lights, and a picnic blanket, and— god.” Jay sucks in a sharp breath when you move his hands higher to cup underneath your chest. “You’re going to be the death of me,” he sighs, pressing his forehead to yours.

“I hope so. Stop being so nice, and take me to your room, please?”

Jay’s eyes flick heavenward. There’s only so much self-restraint left in him. “You win.”

And when he finally kisses you, pressed up against the door of his childhood bedroom, you nearly cry from how tender it is. He kisses you slowly, reverently, like you’re one of the saints from his history books.

“Sometimes, I think I’ve dreamt you up,” you confess to him. The words hang precious and delicate in the space between your lips.

“Let me show you I’m real then, yeah?” He presses a kiss to the corner of your mouth, then licks right into you, eliciting a gasp from the back of your throat. Your fingers find purchase in the soft hair at the back of his head, and you realize that you’ve been breathing the wrong air your whole life; the groan that passes from his mouth to yours is the only thing you want in your lungs from now on. 

Liquid desire pools in your stomach, rising until you think you might choke on it. “Jay, please.”

“Please, what? Use your words, doll.”

“Touch me.”

That’s all he needs to hear. Quicker than you realize it, but just as urgently as you need it, you find yourself laid out on his bed, and then he’s demonstrating that he knows more than just how to play guitar with those thick fingers.

When you make it out of his room an hour later, you’re still glowing with happiness. Jay knows he looks equally lovestruck, not least because his collar is hiding several lipstick stains from you. 

You offer to help him redo his tie, so he anchors you unnecessarily close to him, hands sweeping up and down your side. “I don’t think I told you yet, but you look really nice tonight,” he murmurs. “You look really nice all the time, actually.”

You bury your face in his chest. “I’m going to explode if you keep sweet-talking me like that.”

He presses his smile to the top of your head. “Nooooo, you’re too pretty to explode.”

“Jay!” But you’re both laughing, bathed in the soft magic of newfound devotion. You couldn’t dream up anything better.

(Dating Jay is a lot like fake-dating Jay, as it turns out. In some ways.

In other ways, Jay still manages to take your breath away with new and inventive methods. He really does make you dinner, with tea lights and a picnic blanket, ensconced in the twilight of a park you drive an hour away to get to. He even makes foie gras torchon for the occasion, from scratch, and he watches you intently as you moan in delight at the taste. You joke about your breath being fishy when you kiss later, but he just shrugs, unbothered and already moving so that his head disappears underneath your dress, making you moan in a different way.

So, yes— there’s a lot more kissing, and sex, and intimacy that makes you want to curl up in a ball and hiss at how vulnerable it makes you. But Jay is always welcome in the prickly patches of your soul, and he wants those parts of you as much as he wants the parts of you that paint him in aching affection.

When he finally tells you he loves you that winter— in so many words, because it shows in his every action otherwise—, it’s three in the morning again, and your hands are fluttering across his brow, smoothing out the creases from a night of worrying about whether he’s really good enough to take over the family business. Your fingers, lovely and dear to him, stitch together the cracks in his self-resolve, and he can’t help but let the words out. His heart absolutely sings when you repeat the words back to him.

Some time later, you ask him to sit for a portrait for you. He doesn’t think too much of it, especially as the seasons bleed into one another and spring brings an influx of senior events, pollen, and the impending question of the future. He’s at your senior thesis, asking you detailed questions during the audience Q&A and wrapping you up in the biggest hug when it’s over, and you sit in on the final class he TAs, applauding when he’s done.

At the showcase of your final portfolio, his jaw drops when you reveal the second portrait (after having laughed his ass off at Jake blubbering over the first one and Yunjin kissing him in public to shut him up). 

The second portrait is of him, and his parents. From his dad’s strong brows, to his mom’s smile lines, to his own hands; every detail is captured, shimmering in loving light. 

He finds that his eyes are wet when you come up to him and brush your thumb against his  eyelashes, smiling brightly at him. “Do you like it?”

“I love it. I love you, so much, like crazy, you don’t even know,” he rambles, laughing through his tears now.

You kiss him quickly but firmly, just a reminder that your mouth was made to fit against his. “Love you more, London boy. Speaking of…” You lean back to stare at him through your eyelashes. “I got the Rhodes,” you whisper.

His eyes widen like saucers. “You’re coming with me?”

“More like you’re coming with me,” you say, knowing that Jay had requested to be placed at his family business’s England location to be close to you in the event that you got the scholarship.

“Obviously,” he relents without missing a beat. “I’m going to follow you everywhere. Can’t get rid of me now.” He dips his head to kiss you longer. Lightning still shoots through his fingertips, just like the first time, and every time after that.

At graduation, you tell him, “You know, I think I’ve decided what I want your favor to be.”

He smiles at you, familiar and true. “Yeah? What’s that?”

“Just love me, for a long, long time.”

“Easy, Cinderella.”)

[bwabys-scenarios]

Hi hi it’s your favorite sleepy fic advisor/Kurapika stan!!! I’m playing hooky to go to the lake today fuck a minimum wage job in a capitalistic hell world heehoo

What do you think Kurapika’s love language(s) is/are? He’s a thoughtful dude, so I feel like gift giving is his time to shine, but at the same time acts of service when you’re overworking yourself- ugh he’s such a sweetheart lich rally the perfect man 😫💗

My own bf just snagged me a record player at a garage sale yesterday after years of having his own record collection and begging me to start one as well. The first thing I did was order Hozier’s new album. I could see Kurapika doing something similar, especially with how they both share an mbti type :’) cozy nights spent listening to vinyl music. He gets a gift that you’d love, not expect, and could enjoy for a long time together. He checks off the Perfect Gift Trifecta every time.

I’m all over the place here, it’s earlier than I normally wake up and my ADHD meds haven’t quite kicked in yet I apologize. Brainstorming with you and helping on Fixer Upper has been the highlight of my summer, seeing ideas we collaborate on come to life in real time is just *chefs kiss*

I gotta pack my bags now before I go but just thought I’d drop in here, pet the cats for me and hang in there, the weather will cool down soon enough!

-K.A.

How Kurapika shows his love:

Acts of service

Kurapika hasn’t always been there for you when you really needed him, meaning now that he is, he would do next to anything for you. He’ll run to the store to grab your favorite snacks when you aren’t feeling well, gently massages all your sore spots, accompanies you on shopping trips.

He wants to do things for you, even if it’s as simple as opening a jar of pickles, he feels so in love when he’s able to do little things that are of service to you.

Gift Giving

Kurapika is a gift giver, through and through. He has trouble holding himself back from buying every little thing that reminds him of you. That keychain with your favorite character on it, those shoes that would go nice with your favorite dress, and flowers of all kinds.

He also enjoys making you gifts, mostly consisting of clothing. He’s really good at sewing, and you taught him to knit, so he’s always making you new dresses that fit you perfectly. He’s weak for a good sundress, and when you’re wearing something he made you it’s hard for him to keep his hands to himself.

Words of Affirmation

Kurapika wants you to know how much he adores you, so compliments and little words of adoration are commonplace in your shared home.

It’s like he can’t go one second without telling you how amazing you are, and how in love with you he is. You’re his angel, his princess, the love of his life. He’ll plant kisses on your neck as he coos about how beautiful you are.

What he wants from his partner:

Physical Touch

As I’ve said before, Kurapika is TOUCH STARVED!! Before you, he hadn’t been held by another person since he was a child, so once he gets a taste of your touch he craves it.

His favorite thing is to lay his head in your lap, face buried in your tummy as you run your fingers through his hair. Kurapika could stay like this forever if you let him.

When he gets you pregnant, all he wants is to nuzzle against your baby bump, leaving kisses against your skin. He loves you so much!

He also enjoys just being held in your arms, with you rubbing soothing circles into his back. Kurapika can be a bit of a clinger once he gets comfortable around you, so he prepared!

Quality Time

Once Kurapika comes around to his feelings for you, all he wants is to spend more and more time with you. He needs you to hold him, to want to do fun things with HIM!

His favorite thing is when you have him sit at the kitchen table while you bake, feeding him bits of frosting or jam. He also likes cuddling up with you on the couch, watching some random movie. He enjoys accompanying anywhere you wish to go, as long as he gets to spend time with you he’s happy!

Words of Affirmation

It may not seem like it, but Kurapika is actually pretty insecure about his body. He struggles with believing you’re attracted to him, even if you’re always heating up when he’s around you.

Praise him, tell him how pretty and handsome he is. He needs to know you find him attractive. There are many other men in your life that he thinks look way better than him, so reassure him that he’s the only one for you. It makes him swoon!

[chrollo-lucilfers-chains]

Chrollo x gn!reader

His s/o gets taken.

Warnings: Kidnapping (it's not Chrollo tho), murder

Part 1

It has happened.

Chrollo hadn't thought this day would come, especially not so soon. But it had come and he hadn't been prepared.

He's in the middle of finishing someone off when you call him.

Standing on a balcony, the wind blowing strongly so far up, he holds a trembling man by his neck. The man is an unimportant informant of the government and he'd been involved in the troupe's latest heist so he has to be disposed of.

Chrollo has him dangling over the balcony's edge, desperately pleading at him to spare his life.

Without any expression Chrollo ends his victims miserable suffering with a snap of the wrist and lets him fall, pulling out his phone instead. Why would you call him, especially in the middle of the night?

He's told you to never interrupt him with unnecessary calls before. Given, it had been under the pretense of potential interruptions of his 'job', which wasn't really wrong but it didn't give you a lot of information either. You'd understood, of course.

To see your caller ID on his screen now alerted him greatly and so he picked up with a short 'Yes?' only to get interrupted by your strangely hushed voice.

"Chrollo? Oh thank God, it was the right number. I'm sorry to call you this late but I didn't know who else to call! There is someone in my house."

Chrollo's blood runs cold, his face hardening.

"I don't know what they want but there's three or four of them and they're searching for me. I'm hiding in the closet but I don't know how long it takes till they find me!"

He gives a meaningful glance to Pakunoda.

"Shh, calm down, it's going to be okay, angel!", he shushes you in the faked, softer voice that he uses with you so often, not wanting the noise of your whispers to alert your intruders.

His eyes flicker over to Pakunoda who immediately nods and leaves the room in a hurry.

"I'm coming to get you, okay? I'll be there as soon as I can. I'm on my way."

Chrollo stays on the phone as he rushes down the halls. When he reaches Pakunoda, who's already pulled up a car, he gets in and they speed into the night.

In the silent car he can hear your voice clearer than before. No nightbreeze is lashing around him and so he hears the quiet sobs. You're crying, Chrollo notes with displeasure.

"I think they're getting closer, Chrollo. I'm scared", you whimper, your voice clearly trembling.

Chrollo clenches his jaw and closes his eyes.

Six minutes until he'll arrive.

As he focuses on forming a plan how to get you out without alerting the intruders your voice sounds through the phone in a desperate whisper.

"They're infront of the closet!", Chrollo listens as you hold your breath. Everything is silent until a voice cuts through the speakers.

"Well hello there, princess!"

You let out a hitched breath. "Plea- Please, I don't know what you want but just leave, I don't have anything to steal!!"

"Heh, agree to disagre- Wait, is that a phone?"

Chrollo can make out commotion on the other side of the connection. He imagines you holding on to the phone, not daring to let go. Then he hears a scream. Your scream, to be exact and his eyes flash open with rage. Did the guy just hit you?!

There are a few wimpers and then the connection turns silent.

Chrollo ends the call and takes a deep breath as he composes himself. He sits silently in the car, his face mimicking that of a corpse. Shalnark already accessed the needed data and cameras to know where they've taken you. Pakunoda and Nobunaga are now with their boss, on their way to your location.

In the silence of the car Chrollo thinks about you and the person you are, always so ready to give everything. So eager to help him with whatever he needs.

And he takes it. He takes without a concern in the world.

All the years of being starved of human kindness and touch seem to be melting away whenever he's with you, sinking into your warm embrace when you hold him like he could slip away any moment.

His eyes flicker between the buildings passing by. The moonlit night makes it harder to discern them from one another and paints them in a cold light

Somebody is going to die tonight.

[starsurface]

Hello! how are you? I hope well.

so :) I'm the person who made the requests for Liu Kang and Reiko on Ao3 and I'm glad you joined tumblr :D

I hope it won't be a problem if I ask for some headcanons of caregiver Shao Kahn and regressor Reiko?

Oh my gosh hiiiii!!! :D. I distinctly remember writing yours (I was SO excited about havung an escuzse to write Reiko <3)

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

CG Shao w/ Regressor Reiko Hcs

🗡 Reiko regresses to about 4-5

🛡 Very much a kid regressor . . . But my goodness, an energetic kid regressor

🗡 The first time Shao saw Reiko regress was when Reiko was clearly irritating a middlespace Rain and had to intervene before any fighting started

🛡 Ended up ‘watching’ both regressors (Rain denies that he was ever babysat, he was just in the room while Shao watched Reiko 😒)

🗡 Reiko actually panicked after Shao watched him and was worried about his job position (it was an incredibly vulnerable scene between both men)

🛡 Ever since then, Reiko likes running to Shao some times when he's small

🗡 Shao actually adores watching him, especially because he had to raise Reiko to face war and terrifying things and now he can give him the childhood he knows Reiko lings for

🛡 (^ Feels secretly guilty that his way of raising Reiko is why he regresses, Reiko has yet to comment)

🗡 Reiko does see Shao as a Dad figure, and after he first regresses around him, almost any praise from him will make him feel small and involuntarily regress (it got better, and was able to control it again, don't worry)

🛡 Once called Shao ‘Dad’ by accident when he was big and it made Reiko slip by accident because of how worried he was about Shao getting upset

🗡 Shao just patted his head and asked if there was anything he could do for him

🛡 Reiko is very . . . energetic, and extremely chaotic

🗡 Loves wrestling!!!

🛡 Actually, loves any type of play fighting

🗡 Wrestling, sword fighting, pillow fights, all of them!!!

🛡 Although he gets a bit (really) rough when he's play fighting and can accidentally hurt someone :(

🗡 Luckily, Shao's very strong, and he's more than willing to play fight with Reiko

🛡 Makes sure to give him wooden play swords though, he's not having any accidents happen

🗡 Usually, Reiko likes acting like a brat or patience testing

🛡 But with Shao? He is an angel!! 👼 (Que to all his friends glaring at him)

🗡 Will try to patience test, but is also much more willingly to follow Shao's ‘orders’ than anyone else

🛡 Shao realized this and encouraged him to act more normal and be more kid like

🗡 He might be his best soldier, but right now, he's his favorite kid

🛡 (^ No Reiko didn't cry at that confession, you saw nothing)

🗡 Shao is a lot more willing to let things slide because of this

🛡 Usually, when he says it's bedtime, it's bedtime

🗡 But if Reiko chooses to whine and pout? Well . . . five more minutes won't hurt, but no more!!

🛡 Shao's CG nicknames are Dada, Papa, or just Shao (a sign that Reiko's regressing too, since he always makes sure to say General Shao)

🗡 Reiko's favorite nicknames are Little Warrior, Little One, Baby Boy, Darling, ‘Hun, Precious

🛡 Reiko does have times where he's not super chaotic and energetic

🗡 Instead, he's very calm and is willing to sit down and cuddle

🛡 Loves cuddles, and loves it when Shao cuddles him because of how big Shao is and how tiny he feels

🗡 Also really touch starved and actively searches for praise and attention (even if he has to act out for it)

🛡 Story time!!! Outlandish tales!!!

🗡 You thought Reiko gave good story times? Shao gives amazing story times, and little Reiko firmly believes every single one of them

🛡 . . . They'll probably get him hyped up by accident though and try to get Shao to fight him like how the fighter in the story did >:3

🗡 . . . You don't understand the amount of angst I could give Reiko (he's one of my favorites)

🛡 Coming back after an incredibly harsh day as a warrior only to break down as soon as his door shuts

🗡 Or rushes to the bathroom to hide in the shower so no one can see him cry

🛡 Luckily, either one of his friends or Shao always find him

🗡 Reiko would say he ever regresses super young, he prides himself in being a big kid

🛡 But these days? These days anyone who sees him like this all really agrees that he regresses more to a baby headspace

🗡 Needs to be held and cradled, needs to have someone there but is also too afraid to reach out for someone

🛡 Demands cuddles when he's like this

🗡 Shao physically can't let him go anyhow, Reiko's grip is way too tight on him

🛡 Shao got Reiko a bottle for when he gets like this, because Reiko can't use his big kid cups with how shakey his hands are

🗡 Reiko pouted and claimed he didn't need it but it's super useful for when he's like this

🛡 Most times when he's small, he keeps his face paint on, he likes wearing it, very proud of being a warrior

🗡 But sometimes he'll take it off (no one is allowed to make fun of his face because he will burst into tears)

🛡 Shao has caught Reiko more than once looking in the mirror confused because he didn't recognize himself without his war faint

🗡 Will let his hair down more when he's tinier, and loves it when Shao plays with it

🛡 He's actually more of an independent regressor, and is able to regress and watch himself

🗡 But his constant search for anyone who will give him praise and soft touches makes him a lot more dependant than he realizes

🛡 Luckily though, Shao realized, and makes sure to give Reiko some extra fatherly loving

🗡 Reiko's favorite regression item is a stuffed bear he has that he's owned for years

🛡 It was the first stuffie he was ever given, and was actually a gift from Shao himself when he was first taken in

🗡 That bear does not leave his room and stays on his bed, most times tucked in comfortably

🛡 Shao was surprised to see the stuffie still alive and offered to buy Reiko a new one (his old one is pretty . . . tattered)

🗡 Reiko absolutely refuses because that's his favorite stuffie and no one can take it from him >:(

🛡 It's only one of the few things he sees as his and can't bare to part with it

🗡 . . . It is so . . loved to the point that while it mainly stays tucked in Reiko's bed, he can't sleep with it because one tear and it’ll go bye bye

🛡 So it's either gently in his hands (one of the only things he's gentle with) or on the bed

🗡 Shao did get Reiko a new stuffie specifically for sleepy time but now Reiko has two favorite stuffies!! :D

🛡 Shao isn't always a soft man, but he's extremely soft towards a little Reiko, that's basically his kid after all <3

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

AAAAAAAH, REIKO IS ANOTHER FAVORITE TRADGETY OF MINE!!!! :(

[flowersandbirdsflyingfree]

Fuck it. Seeing all these people dive into your inbox for postal matchups makes me wanna join in.

Fuck it. Let's do it- also sorry if wrote so much- this is my first time even doing this.

I am a 22 year old nonbinary, pansexual as hell. I am 5'4ft in terms of height. My hair is short with an undercut style and bleached at the end cause the dyed faded overtime. I don't care what I wear as long I am comfy even with that I am self-conscious if I have to wear something out of my comfort zone and I wear glasses occasionally especially if am I going out. I am always seen with a bag that has keychains and enamel pins of my favorite things (mostly Pokémon lmao) because I tend to bring stuff to draw if we are sitting down somewhere.

I draw for fun and whatever I like to do draw, I tend to experiment in art styles but never dabbling in stuff that is really challenging like realism. I like to just draw what is in my mind and can be loose with it. From silly skrunkly doodles to rather horrifying looking creatures. I am usually awkwardly silent but I can talk to others if given a chance. I have a bad temper from time to time though am not easily irritable, it is just being talked down to like as I am an idiot does not help the person telling me things I did wrong though that doesn't mean I am not open to constructive criticism. Mentioning the self-conscious/insecurities will lead me to kind of say self-degrading things about myself whether it be my work or general although people tell me otherwise, I never gain the confidence in myself. I don't even prioritize my own health or well-being in favor of helping those around me that can lead me to exhausting myself. I am a bit physically touched starve but I don't force it on others cause I respect their space even if it's someone I know and close with, I have a fear of making them uncomfortable. I tend to overthink a lot of things and can be indecisive as hell. Being gifted stuff is going to make me obligated to return someone back because it is a big gesture in my eyes although the person gifted to me because they wanted to or think I deserve it. I am easily amused at things so show me like something stupid looking? I will be distracted for hours. Hyper-fixations are hard to control cause I move one thing I like to another.

Relationship? Usually I don't notice romantic interest until I am told, I am kinda shit of picking up signals yet I know how if I don't feel the same way towards the person who has a crush on me. Though if I feel the same way, I am easily flustered but nervous cause I don't know what to do and overthink on what to do in the situation. Not picky on physical, Someone with compassion and a sense of humor is something I find nice. I have to admit this, I have an internal fear of being broken up with especially my previous relationship and potentially being cheated on as it doesn't help my insecurities. - I don't have a specific favorite of music, I just go with whatever flows with my vibe. (Though if I must? Atlas: A letter to my freshmen self) - Tend to go back to nostalgic stuff from time to time. - I play whatever games even horror despite that I am easily scared LMAO - Attachment to plushies that I even bring one with me (I HAVE DUDE PLUSH AND I BRING HIM WITH ME) - I love all aesthetics and nobody can stop me, They are all beautiful in my eyes. - Axolotls are my favorite creatures that I even have one as a squishmallow I bought and my fixation is a stupid looking axolotl character named Kinito /silly Weeee that's all amma just yeet myself into the void- GOODLUCK ON THESE BOOM SHOOTER AND POSTAL MATCHUP, I'VE BEEN SEING YOUR WRITING AND YOU DID AN AMAZING JOB

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! I’m really glad I can keep the tone of Postal well enough to do you all good service for these!!😭😭💖💖💖 You’re truly an angel, my friend

Now, without further ado, I match you with:

Postal 4 Dude

He’s a little confused about Pokémon, but he thinks they’re really cool. His top favorite types are ghost, fire and dragon types. Cubone is his favorite though because it reminds him of Champ.

He will go all out to buy and steal all sorts of trinkets for you. He also gifted you guys matching pins for your bag and his bathrobe. And an Axolotl plushie- NO WAIT! A plushie and a glass figure of one.

Play horror games with him it’s so funny

HE CANNOT HANDLE ANY OF IT. No jumpscares. No looming dread. None of it. Get him the fuck out of there! You guys can get scared together and then try to cool off with Rollercoaster Tycoon destruction mods to lighten the mood after (you had to tell Dude that no he can’t destroy Kunny Island like in the game)

I feel like your pining is both throwing signs to each other but it floats over each other’s head until one big moment where you confess at the same time in the middle of some disaster situation. Like Edensin could be on literal fire and you guys are ignoring it because omg the crush is mutual all along!!!

He is the second nicest Postal Dude. You can count on him for being compassionate towards you. Now that he’s mellowed out, he can show you how to be loved by someone who truly cares for you. If he trusts you, which he does, then he has endless loyalty for you. Never will he hurt you like the past has. He will fuck up your ex if he sees ‘em

Dude lounges about when he has no odd jobs to do. He’s gonna fill that touch starvation of yours. Always hanging his arm around your shoulder, being the big spoon, kissing (better than he used to be). Rub his temples for him after a long day, it’s like a cheat code to get him all mush-mush

I can see Dude liking music similar to that Atlas song. Other than older rock music (think Rainbow, Iron Maiden, etc.), he has grown to adapt to lo-fi, metal and rap/ hip hop. Huge Sublime fan btw

Overall, he’s really down to earth when you get to know him. Just a simple guy wanting to survive the American nightmare. The only thing keeping it a dream is you. Trust him. He’ll be the one to give you the love and effort you deserve

[valhearts]

jjk men who are noisy

pairings: gojo x reader, geto x reader, nanami x reader, toji x reader, choso x reader, mahito x reader

cw: mentions of creampies, roughish sex, choking, mentions of marking, praises, degrading, blow jobs, overstimulation, gender neutral reader

a/n: i must spread my agenda, i heart noisy men ♡

Satoru Gojo

When he comes to sex he acts like a porn star. He’s always moaning about how tight you are. He also can’t shut up like at all, but that’s fine you like him like this

All you could get out that night was his name, he had been fucking you into oblivion. The walls of the room echoed the moans and whines that came from you two. His moans were so pretty, you could easily get off from them alone. You had been grabbing his hair to keep yourself steady because of how rough his pace was. “Fuck- I’m so close, can I cum in you?”

Suguru Geto

Geto is noisy in the way he can’t shut up. He always has to say something, he’s a bit too similar to his best friend in this aspect. That’s where the similarities end, Geto doesn’t moan or whimper much, however he does let out an occasional grunt or groan.

Geto smiles as he sees he sight underneath him as he gently wraps his hands around your neck. That night Geto couldn’t shut up about how good he felt and other praises, he enjoyed seeing the disheveled mess he could make out of you. Seeing your small gasps for breath was probably the best part of the night. You could feel his dick twitch in you when he squeezed your neck a bit tighter. “You’re so good for me darling”

Kento Nanami

Nanami has always been a bit of a silent person, never talks much at work or just in general. Well at least when he’s not pounding into you like its the last time he’ll ever see you again

You can still remember all the times your fingernails dug deep into his back, your head buried into his neck, marking him with your bites. All the while, he was trying to hold back whimpers, groans, and moans, all of which felt wonderful on your ears. He was never one for talking but the times he did talk during this were just praises he whispered into your ears, “Ah- you feel wonderful”.

Toji Fushiguro

It’s no secret at all that Toji is noisy, theres no possible way for Toji to shut up during sex. He always has something to say, degrading you for being such a slut, telling you how tight you are, or he badly he wants to fuck you.

He has so many fond memories of you on all fours just for him, letting him fuck you like he was touch starved. His hands holding your hips so tightly as if youd go away if his grip was loose. Biting back any groans or moans seemed pointless to Toji, I mean he’s already balls deep into you. He groans out any dirty thing that comes into his mind. “Heh.. you really are a whore for me”.

Choso Kamo

Choso is the most unintentionally noisiest man you could meet. Any little thing you could do earns a whimper. His whimpers and moans are something you adore. It’s pleasant knowing you absolutely ruin him.

Blowjobs are the easiest way to get noises from Choso. He lets out the prettiest moans and whimpers when he feels your soft lips wrap around his cock. He cups your face and looks at you as if you’re the greatest thing in the whole world. Choso isn’t the chattiest one around but he still stutters out praises for you. “An-Angel you feel so wonderful, pl-please dont stop”.

Mahito

Mahito rivals pornstars when it comes to moaning and the shit he says during sex. His moans sound so fake?? They’re still pretty to hear. Whether his moans are real or not, they’re loud as hell. Mahito is just loud in general, very loud.

Once again, you find yourself allowing Mahito to fuck you like a perverted highschooler. He has came in you far too many times to count, you’re so overstimulated but he still keeps on fucking you. He’s moaning in your ears talking about how you feel so good, how you’re going to make him cum again. His whines grow louder as he’s closer to cumming again. “Ah- im gonna cum again- can we pleasee have one more round pretty please!”

[yandere-kokeshi]

Yandere Keigo Takami / Hawks Headcanons

Warnings: Cussing, mention of cheating/murdering/going through private information, stalking actions/mentions, black mail mention/action, drugging mention.

Authors Note: I do not own this character! I also wanna say there may be spelling mistakes. Did not check for it.

Hawks, my beloved, you are my husband ‼️

As he is the No.2 Hero, he tends to have a lot of potential; getting away with a lot of things with his flirty and charming ways. When he sees someone he likes, wants to start a conversation with, or sleep with: he uses his words, bending them like candy and usually succeeding. 

There are two (2) ways to get his attention, one being ‘the fuck off’ type: The one who bluntly has no interest in him, not falling for his charming ways and denying the suggestion to go out for dinner. Or, you being a ‘sweet angel’. Someone who owns a book or flower shop; one that smells like heaven. These two would make him attracted, and right when you notice; it’s already too late. 

Keigo is smart, silent, and brawny. He uses these to his potential to stalk you at night, like a predator ready to pounce on their prey any minute. He tries to learn about everything about you: hacking into your work files, social media accounts, bank account, electronics, and learning about anything from what you dislike, to how your night routine goes and what you do right when you wake up. 

Keigo doesn’t really care about other people other than you, and this goes along the list of your family, friends, and close relatives. He would black mail them, threatening to tell them to leave you alone, or else. 

He loves to show himself off to you, proving that he can be worthy of protecting, providing, and loving you in ways your other partner couldn't. In addition to your partner (if you have one), Keigo will find ways to sabotage your relationship: showing pictures of them cheating, being villiness, or doing something behind your back other than cheating. Of course, Keigo is there, rubbing your back and telling you ‘it’s okay, I got you Angel. I’m the only one you need.’ 

Hawks would try to manipulate you into a relationship with him rather than kidnapping. He would try to use his words to keep you in the house, make you quit your job, and become a working-from home-person, explaining that it’s dangerous for you to work outside and he’s the only one who can protect you. You wouldn’t even know you were being manipulated into a relationship till it’s too late. Though,  if you're smart and see right through him, trying to break off the ‘friendship’ you two have; he snaps and kidnaps you the night you tell him to leave you alone. 

Keigo’s yandere tendencies are protective, (semi-)delusional, manipulative, and obsessive. Once you wake up from him kidnapping you, he explains that he did this for you and to ‘protect you’. Once he’s over, he gently smiles and serves you food, specifically your favorite. The room is covered with things you like, including your preferred perfume (if you use any), books/a TV, and a camera in the corner of the room that is very well hidden. 

He’s very affectionate. Keigo tends to manipulate you into cuddling with him, expressing he’s very touch-starved and he would love to be held by the love of his life. He loves putting his hands on you anywhere: Thighs, your ass, shoulders, or kissing you so much that you’ll have to push him away at some point. He loves laying on you, either on your thighs, stomach or chest. While you guys hug, he tends to wrap his wings around you both, protecting you in some-way. He also loves resting his head on her neck, breathing in your scent and gently biting it, blowing raspberries from time to time. 

He loves spoiling you. Buying literally anything you love, if you want a new blanket? Sure, he’d buy it and make sure it’s not scratchy and make sure it’s the best to his advances; only the best for his mate. Want a phone? It depends, but sure! Sadly he will have a time limit on it, allowing him to look through what you’ve been doing. Want to go outside for a special occasion? Fine… But he has to hold you and if he sees you talking to anyone, especially a man? We’re leaving.

He’s very paranoid, whether that’s his bird traits or him as your ‘partner’, he tends to go the extra mile with you: baby proofing the entire house, leaving his feathers everywhere, locking and securing the windows. The front door can only be opened as it has finger lock on it, along with three (3) locks. This also includes that there are no doors in the house, other than the bathroom door for privacy, there are no doors; he explained in great detail that it was ‘for his wings’. 

If you somehow do escape: passing through the 24/7 on security cameras, alarm warnings, and picking the locks; you only have a few minutes to fully escape, hide, and pretend to be someone else. The moment he finds you, he isn’t nice anymore. 

The punishments range from how far you ran, how long you hid, and how much damage you did to the house while escaping. The lightest punishment he would do is chain you back up, along with a house-arrest ankle bracelet so he can check your location better. The harshest one will be him guilt-tripping you to the max: crying and yelling that all he wants to do is protect you, yet, you don’t listen. He will even cause himself harm to make you feel bad. He will even bring his childhood into the fights you two have, saying the way he acts is the only way he ‘knows’ because he needs you, and only you. 

Now, if you decide to do the normal ‘physical or verbal’ trying; he’d be more so… Scary. If you decide to kick, punch, or spit: He’d grab you harshly, grabbing the back of your neck as his other hand grips your chin, forcing you to look directly into his eyes; forming a stern bond. “Now what did I tell you if you act up again? Please don’t make me force you to swallow those pills again. Please just love me, I love you so much hon.”

Now, if you decide to use verbal abuse, he’d gently caress your cheek, looking you into your eyes as his turn a darker but cool gold: “please don’t hurt me dove, it quite pains me. I’ve been through enough hell already, please don’t do it.”

Soon, you’d start to fall for him just as much as he did for you. Both of you are on the way to be married, just like the way it should be. 

—

Masterlist || Please reblog and comment instead of commenting, stay well!

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED ©yandere-kokeshi

Do not plagiarize, repost, modify, translate or copy my work.

[morallygreyyn]

Hey! This is my first ask and I am not sure if you have any limits so this is experimental... can I have Illumi and Hisoka making sweet, passionate love with their s/o (fem or gn) and some aftercare fluff 🥺 thank you

passionate love + aftercare with the hxh boys (headcanons)

characters: hisoka, illumi, kurapika x gn!reader

authors note: i think you meant hisoka and illumi seperately (? 👀) so i turned these into headcanons - i hope that's okay anon! also threw kurapika in there for a laugh

warnings: mentions of nsfw content but its minimal

minors dni

requests are open! read my rules here!

dear lord where do i even begin

this man is nothing if not passionate in everything he does

and boy oh boy does he rock your socks off in bed

i imagine passionate love with hisoka would be rough, messy, all over the place but fun

neither of you can get enough

your hands would be constantly over each others body

good luck prying this man away from you

not that you'd want to

this isn't to say that he's not sweet when he wants to be

while i can't imagine hisoka to ever be the slow and steady type, he definitely knows how to combine both passionate and sweet

on the days where he just wants to chill, i'm sure even someone as deranged as him has them at some point, i can imagine he'd focus more on kissing and dragging out your pleasures for as long as possible

and oh man is he willing to just cuddle for the rest of the day/evening/night literally whenever

he’s hands-down a very physical lover and that includes bundling his lover, aka you, in those big strong arms

“kiss me.”

“my lips hurt hisoka.”

“and that’s a problem?”

.....

ok

so he's a challenge ngl

this man is the literal definition of a walking beansprout

as much as i love him

his spectacular brain doesn't grasp the meaning of sweet and passionate

i don't think he had a singular passionate bone in his body if that doesn't include his family and even then it's strained and confused

buuuuuuttttt

i would imagine illumi to realistically take care of any partner that he has

and that includes the bedroom

sweet and passionate love with illumi would be you managing to sneak a few kisses full on french kissing, or pulling his hair in the heat of the moment which he loves but would never be caught dead admitting that

he's definitely the type to focus on getting the job done rather than drag things out

but i can imagine he would be willing to go at the pace you set if you guide him through

he would prefer this bc he has no idea what he's doing half the time even though he acts the opposite

you wouldn't call it sweet and passionate unless illumi looks as if he's been dragged through several bushes and had a midlife crisis halfway through

i'm talking his lips swollen, hair messed and tangled, love bites scattered across his body 

perhaps even a light flush to his cheeks but i'm being generous here but he’d look so freaking pretty i-

for aftercare you would have to force him to stay with you

this man doesn't want to waste time by just laying there

but if you lay on top of him

and if you wrap his arm around your body, what can he do?

a lot, he can do a lot

but he loves you in his own twisted way so he's not moving unless you want him to

why would he?

you might even catch him as you’re drifting off into sleep plant the barest hint of a kiss on your forehead

would absolutely deny it later

touch starved illumi

angel

the sweetest lover oml

literal, and i cannot stress this enough, perfection

making love with him would be like floating amongst the clouds

or smth poetic like that

lots of kisses, compliments, and cuddles would be involved both during and afterwards

every time you two would make love it would always be the sweetest, fluffiest and most passionate thing

is absolutely 100% the type to put your needs before his

but lucky for him you’re also the same about him

so it’s always mutual pleasure

adores when you pull his hair lightly or call him pet names or tell him that he’s doing well

i believe aftercare would just be the both of you wrapped in each others arms, basking in the afterglow

would ask if you need anything

you say no

he gets you things anyway

or if you’re both really tired you just lie there and refuse to leave each others side

pls just give kurapika all the cuddles kisses and love that you can he desperately needs it

[izaanagi]

part 2 of dazai with a corruption kink please? 😳

You ask and I deliver… hopefully. Enjoy! ♡

“ YOU JUST CAN’T GET ENOUGH. „

pairing: dazai osamu x virgin!shy!female reader

warnings: MDNI! corruption kink!, reader works at the ADA, reference to previous part, reader is very horny but confused, possessive Dazai, oral sex (f!receiving), minor bruising, vaginal fingering.

wc. 3.6k

sans’ corner: this is the second part to this anon request (you can read that one as a stand-alone!) ♡ 

You don’t know whether it is bound to be this way, or whether it is your new born wetness to control your impulses, but it grows harder and harder to detach yourself from Dazai. You just know that everybody has their own suspects on what has happened between the two of you, judging by the looks Kunikida and Tanizaki throw toward your direction, and likely Ranpo already figured it out (but Ranpo figures out everything, so he doesn’t really count), but you can’t just refrain yourself, after that one time. 

And it is embarrassing to say the least, ridiculous, because anyone could just look at your face and they would immediately know the amount of obscenities going through your mind. You barely recognise yourself, and you don’t know how to go back, at when Dazai’s hands did not seem so long and perfect to caress the slit between your thighs, at when his pants did not seem tight enough to let you see an outline of his cock, at when just a touch of his did not set your insides ablaze. 

However, if you’re honest with yourself, you are not sure you do want to go back - at being clueless, being touch starved, at not being interested in what Dazai and his dirty mouth have to offer.

But it certainly makes you think, whether this is normal or just a side effect of anyone who comes into contact with Dazai Osamu. His influence, the way he carries himself and the spell he has at hand all the time are things everyone is affected by; and yet, you feel like you’re the only one who is simmering, bubbling in your own flesh - yearning for relief, which only Dazai can bring. Now, you delude yourself that you might understand the people who get stuck in the desert and crave for water so bad they start hallucinating; you feel the same way, pathetic, scared of being that way - dependent on a single action, filling up your mind every damn second of the day. And the worst part of it, is that Dazai knows it fully well, and the last words he said to you before separating, still ring in your ears as a threat, as a promise.

“We did not even begin.” 

Yeah, your ass. 

Dazai has not made any move to further deepen your intimate acquaintance, and it drives you mad to think that he is doing it on purpose, or even worse, because he is not interested anymore. You have to force yourself not to get stuck looking at him, making the situation even worse than it already is. You have to force yourself not to try on yourself the things he did to you, trying to fit your less satisfying fingers inside you - but you are unable to control yourself when images of the encounter in that hole-in-the-wall replay in your mind like a movie on loop. 

And foolishly, you think to yourself, that when the next time comes, it will be easier for Dazai to slide his fingers inside and fuck you thoroughly the way he promised you to. 

It will be easier for you to get used to it as well, and Dazai might just heat up things a notch, if that was the case. But you observe as he wantonly drapes himself over Kunikida’s chair, trying to annoy the poor man doing his job and not having a care in the world, and a sense of disappointment hits you again, just enough for it to sting a little - and enough to make you slap yourself on the cheeks, deciding to get your shit together and get over this stupid thing, forgetting all about Dazai and his long, elegant fingers inside you and the angels crying at the miracle of not being shy in that moment (which is a big fat lie, as your reddening cheeks show, just at mere memory). 

But your actions gain you some attention from the person you really did not want it to: Ranpo just looks at you with his head bent to the side, as if observing you is enough to know what is going through your mind. You see him calling you with a finger, not paying attention to the way Dazai side eyes your movements, following your every step up until Ranpo’s desk. 

“What’s with that frown?” Ranpo asks, and you feel yourself blushing even more for absolutely no reason.

“I am not frowning,” you try to dissuade the man from inquiring further, but Ranpo smiles at you condescendingly, as if he knows exactly what your jumbled thoughts are about, and mocking you for trying to desperately hide them. 

Ranpo is non convinced.

“I’d recommend you to pay more attention to what is happening around you, rather than inside you,” the man whispers in a conspiring tone, narrowing the space between your faces and making you instantly blush to the root of your hair. He even winks, and it would be less mortifying if you weren’t as bashful as you are: Ranpo Edogawa is one attractive man, but all you can do, is just be taken aback from the way Ranpo glances behind you, where a pair of sharp eyes is glaring daggers into your back and nod with your head lowered. 

As if Ranpo just concluded his very important mission, he slumps in his chair and opens some weird flavoured snack from his stash, munching on it and being happy about being alive. Taking that as your cue to leave, you turn your heels and walk to your desk - but the sensation of eyes boring into you does not leave. 

It feels like a deja vu, a nostalgic reminder of the days in which you weren’t so consumed by Dazai and his eternal mind games you don’t really understand. On the other hand, it makes you hopeful, excited, yearning for more: and the more you feel those eyes looking at you, the more scenarios of warm touches, sloppy kisses, panting mouths and shushed moans jump into your head. If you weren’t at work, you probably would have been tempted to rush your fingers through your foils, just to live a few moments more in the delusion of Dazai breathing on your neck and ruining you for good. 

It’s then, out of the clear blue, Dazai takes your hand, and drags you away from the office. 

“We’ll be back in a few,” he shouts as the only notice, and you can hear the way the air moves around Kunikida’s head, when he shakes it - very done with Daze’s antics, and can imagine the smirk Ranpo is sporting. You work with a bunch of weirdos, but none of them comes even close to the one who has taken ahold of your limb and has been walking towards an unknown direction, without a single word.

“Dazai-san..?” you try to call out, but he is not even listening to you, just marching ahead. 

Dazai drags you for a few meters more, behind a wall that leads to a cul-de-sac where you suspect some other offices, now abandoned, were previously located. Your head slightly bangs on the concrete of the wall, and you wince painfully for a second, but even then you know that Dazai is not paying you attention, his hand still holding yours and the other one over his mouth, in contemplation of the dirty floor below your feet. 

“What did Ranpo say to you?” Dazai asks, voice low and threatening, but not scary. His eyes lift up to lock into yours, and you see him lingering in a state of daze and confusion, the clear will to know, but at the same time to leave it as a secret. It makes you skip a beat, and redden your cheeks. 

Gulping for air, you try to do your best not to let Dazai know that while his name never came up, he was the implied object of the brief conversation. 

“No-nothing in particular. Just asked how I…was doing,” you attempt explaining, but it is clear like day that Dazai does not believe a word you say. Yet, he smiles - his eyes still swimming. He closes the gap between your bodies, knee separating your thighs and an arm above your head, dwarfing you even more. 

“Oh, I see. So I’m nothing in particular, virgin-chan?” the man humours you, and his lips finally make contact with your skin after the millions of times your mind played that exact scenario in your head. It’s not surprising that not even one comes close to the real thing: Daze’s lips are warm, his breath is hitched and the kiss all but breaks your skin into goosebumps. 

Once again, a deja vu hits as your words get stuck in your throat, nothing coming out of it, swallowed by the palms now mapping your stomach, your ribs, your chest, your collarbones and wrapping around the point where your neck meets your jaw: Dazai’s lips travel from your ear to your cheek, leaving a trail of dry pecks, until they finally hover over your mouth. 

“Are you going to pretend that you did not want this?” 

He deadpans, and heat waves raging throughout your body freeze at the cold remark. The man’s hands grab your hips and shove them into his, and you discover that no matter how cold Dazai’s words are, he is also sporting a semi erection. He slowly grinds, and there is a shiver coming up your spine you cannot suppress. 

“Do you have fun making me stay this way all day long, huh, virgin-chan?” 

Dazai taunts, but you still can’t find words to answer him. His hips grind lightly on yours, again, and you feel your most inner core rub against Dazai’s cock. 

A choked moan makes it past your lips, right into the brunette’s face. Daze’s teeth are flashed in a smile that reeks of cruelty, and arousal. 

“Already this excited, virgin-chan? Do you want to,” he grinds again, and this time it’s harsher and slower, “rile me up enough so I will lose control all at once, hah?” 

You find it in yourself to shake your head, that ends up on Daze’s shoulders, so you can both hide the tears prickling at your eyes, the overwhelmed blush your cheeks certainly betrays and the dilated pupils you know you have developed since the moment that Dazai finally, finally started touching you.

It feels better than it should. Your hand comes up to hug Daze’s neck, soft and warm.

“Answer me,” Dazai growls, and he grinds again, his cock stiffening in his pants each time more, making them tighter and outlining his lengths better each time, “or I will take you right here,” he finishes. 

Truth to be told, you’re only half listening to him, more concentrated on the pulsation your pussy is experiencing, and the way nipples are hurting in your bra, and the breath that is full of Dazai’s scent. Looming over your figure, Dazai takes up all of your vision, and your mind goes blank to anything that is not directly connected to your body or his: it’s as if you’re in a vacuum, nothing existing outside of the secluded space where Dazai is, successfully, attempting to take your virginity. 

“We weren’t, really..” you swallow, as Dazai thrusts again, “talking about anything in particular.”

“Then why was he looking at me like that?” Dazai prompts, his hands now wandering over your shoulders, just to stop over your breasts, fondling them carefully, trying to pinpoint the exact spot of your nipples. 

“Like what?” 

You innocently rebut, as another strangled sound comes out of your mouth, when Dazai gruffly grabs your butt and pushes you to straddle his thigh, your stomach coming into contact with his now fully erected shaft and your pussy shuffling in your panties over Dazai’s toned thighs. 

“Like he figured you out,” Dazai supplies, still not surrendering a plausible answer to his own idea, “like he knows what is going on.” 

You feel Dazai move your hips, not understanding what exactly he has in mind, until his knee hits the wall behind you, and you feel your pussy coming into contact with his hard manhood once again. This time the contact is longer, and rough, Dazai’s hips pressing on yours and then grinding enough for the clothes separating you to feel useless and oppressive, wanting to get rid of them to feel more, feel Dazai’s soft skin brush yours. 

The thoughts make you lift your head up and bang it against the wall - but the impact never hits, as Dazai takes a hold of your head right before and cradles it against him.

“I think that.. Ranpo-san figured out that I..,” almost choking on your words, your breath hitches as Dazai’s hand, the one with which he has holding your head, wraps around your neck and squeezes lightly, as the other hand adventures further, teasing first one wanton curve of your breast, then the hip and arrives right at the point where the hips meets your thigh, and it stops right there, frustratingly hovering over but not moving further.

“That you what?” He teases, as his finger start to form circular patterns over your pants, coming always closer and closer to your focal point, but never close enough.

“That I..” you swallow, breathless. 

The hand does not move.

“That we…”

“We, what?” 

“That we did something.” 

“Something? Is that what is was? Something?” Dazai drawls, thumb pushing out and almost, almost, touching the spot that is becoming the focal point of your body, nerves tensing up and heat pooling in between.

“Dazai-san..,” you try to say, defend, beg, but nothing comes out of it. Dazai’s reigns over the conversation, over your body, over you. And they are tight, controlling and they make everything as harsh, and deliciously satisfying, as they can.

“I want to shatter you to pieces for thinking that was just something. I want you to be filled with thoughts of me fucking you against the desk, so that everyone fill look at you and know what exactly you’re thinking about, and then you can call it something,” Dazai whispers in your ear, and you don’t have the courage to tell him that that is exactly what happened, that those words fill up your thoughts every minute of you daily tasks, and there are so many things you don’t know and yet you want to let Dazai do to you; it’s a vicious circle - wanting Dazai, and letting him manipulate you into wanting him more, just for him to touch you more, and wanting him more the next type. 

It’s Daze’s spell, and you can’t force yourself to undo it. You are bound by his spell, and you don’t regret it for a minute, not even once, not even ever.

You don’t regret it when his lips hit yours, and when finally, finally he drags you away from that wall, having had enough enough and the walk to his apartment is short, experimental, tough in his pace. 

You do not regret it when your back hits the bed in his bedroom, huge and lined with soft sheets, grey in colour. Dazai does not waste a minute into pushing your hands up into a hold, your wrists pinned down and his knee in between your legs again, as he lowers himself onto you, shyness long forgotten. 

“I don’t want to stop,” you hear Dazai breathe. It’s a soft sentence, one filled with a tone you quite do not recognise, but it seem desperate, raw, yearning for a thing that never could have been real.

It makes your heart shrink, as your adjust underneath his hold.

You suck some oxygen in, and closing your eyes you let it go. The words that follow are both surprising, and not.

“I don’t want you to stop, either.”

Daze’s breath hitches, and there is tenderness in him stripping you out of your clothes, gently holding you, caressing you, worshipping your body the way it deserves to. The dips of your skin are kissed, and licked, and Dazai hooks a fingers into your panties before moving them away, legs draped over his shoulder and so wide for him. 

The look, direct, unseen ever and embarrassing, he gets of your most intimate part is enough to make yourself try to cover up with your palms, and then the sheets. When Dazai’s nose hovers over the hair of your vagina, there is a whimper leaving your lips. 

A soft, warm, wet tongue just laps the entire length of it, encompassing the tenderness of the flesh, the flavour of intimacy and feminine spell and it graces you with the knowledge of Daze’s shoulder slumping over you, nose a millimetre away from the hole that impatiently twitches at the thought of what comes afterwards. 

“Fuck,” he sighs, “might not be able to hold on for such a long time.”

There is a distinct change in the way Dazai poses himself now: there is no light in the bedroom, but you can see the outline of his hair draped over your hips, tongue working open your seams. God forbid he ever gets up from there. 

You tentatively grasp the strands of his dishevel strands, and yank softly. Dazai does not budge from where he is going down on you, but there is a hitch in his movements and he does not ask you to stop, so you flicker the hair in between your fingers and nail lightly his scalp. 

Little flicks of his tongue brush against your clit, your walls, your hole: you feel it slip in, slip out past the tight ring of muscles. It elicits a smug reaction from Dazai when you cannot breathe correctly and the hold on his head you forgot about, tightens on default. 

You cannot understand where Dazai’s wet tongue, and your own wetness start to mingle, except that there is a distinct heat creeping up in your stomach and as Dazai’s tongue continues tasting your pussy, slow, wet and unnervingly tireless, he sneaks in one finger, firstly circling the outside and then promptly slipping in first two phalanxes, then the whole finger. 

It should feel weird, or at least, intrusive - but there is nothing you can concentrate on feeling when Dazai sucks on your clit, and his other hand grabs one of your breast, nipple twisting between his forefingers. 

“You taste so addicting, love, I am not stopping even if you beg me to,” Dazai says, and living with the consequences of the words does not scare you as much as Dazai stopping does. You gulp in air, but nothing makes it in your lungs. 

Flashbacks storm your memories, as if remembering the first time Dazai breached the cavern of desire would bring you any relief in the current moment, or make it easier to hold still, instead of writhing around.  Dazai’s finger does not stay still for long: he tentatively moves in and out, and it does not hurt but you crave more than it. You crave a certain stretch, a burn to witness and remember Dazai by. 

As if Dazai isn’t the only thing you can think about. As if Dazai’s finger do not plague your daydreams and the erotic dreams you experience so often lately, making you wake up wanting and angry about being unable to say that you want it. 

It does not compute that Dazai is here, that he is not moving his tongue away from your pulsating centre until you come undone under his ministration. Words do not come, and you have to stop yourself from emitting embarrassing sounds. Thought jumble in and out of reasonable terms, and staying quiet seems like a smart choice.

As if reading your thoughts (and you’re still not entirely convinced Dazai cannot actually do it), the man gives a harsh suck, as he tries to insert a second finger inside. That, seems to spur you on, thighs trembling, eyelids fluttering closed as the knot in your stomach fastens and tightens, and Dazai’s tongue is frenetically moving in and out your vulva, your delicious and inviting pink pried open for the man to see. You whimper. 

He breathes you in again, and swallows you whole - until the second finger seems to just slip in entirely.

He gives you a few moments to adjust, but not more than that: he starts moving the fingers, and to lessen the strain the other hand grabs and twists your nipples, caresses your collarbones, to the part of the neck he can easily reach, making your body feverish with want. 

The overwhelming ensemble of sensations tips you off just as Dazai starts scissoring his two fingers inside you. There are two moans leaving your mouth, promptly filled by Dazai’s fingers and you can taste yourself on them. You suck anyways, as Dazai ends up licking you clean, and only after being satisfied with the way your thighs tremble and clench around his shoulders, still dauntingly clad, from slight overstimulation, he climbs with his knees to circle your head with his arms and plant an open mouthed kiss square on your lips.

He hauls himself on his slender arms and smirks. It irks you the way he does not look disheveled in the slightest.

“You look so pretty when you cum,” he dares, but then his smile grows wider. 

“Can’t wait to see you pass out from it.” 

Despite the flush of your orgasm, the colour drains from your face. Dazai smirks knowingly, and oh, you know it well: you’re in big, big trouble and the man is still dressed. 

A small “fuck,” escapes your lips.

© renaissansse, 2022.

[kpopmakesmeweep]

badboy!yeonjun x innocent!reader 

word count: 21k

angst, fluff, smut

when your teacher asked you to tutor in the beginning of the school year, you were hesitant even then. 

you knew that it meant your lunch period and one study hall for the day were gonna be completely booked, helping younger kids grasp the basic idea that the mitochondria was the powerhouse of the cell.

but then you met one young girl desperate to pass her first test in october and knew your teacher had gotten you, sending a small, defeated smile her way as you gave her the okay to put your name on the list. 

you didn’t expect to come back from winter break with the news that the next student you’d be tutoring wasn’t a sweet 7th grade girl but none other than choi yeonjun. 

the overwhelmingly attractive but horribly intimidating boy who was a year older than you and had, quite possibly, one of the worst reputations the school has ever seen.

if he wasn’t getting suspended for fighting or smoking on school grounds, you’d attempt to block out the mindless gossip about him and all the college girls he’d frequently fraternize with. 

he was in your lunch period when you were a sophomore and he was a junior and you couldn’t help but be fascinated by how handsome he was. how he carried himself and how everyone else seemed to be fascinated by him too.

he was always wearing some variation of black, like his closet was just an empty void of black leather, dark cotton and chains. if he didn’t have on a beanie or hat, his then blue hair was a mess of waves that always made you look a few seconds too long.

you’ll never forget the day that he caught you, your nose in a textbook as you studied for a midterm before a loud shout of his name caught your attention. 

you looked up and watched one of his friends playfully punch him in the arm, something about him hooking up with the older girl he had his eye on first and yeonjun only smirking at him devilishly. 

he didn’t look apologetic or regretful in the slightest, more so like he’d do again just because he could and just because he knew the girl would be eager to have another go with him. 

your breath caught in your throat when his deep brown eyes met yours, his head cocked as he held your gaze with all the confidence and smugness you could never have. 

it took his lips quirking into a cocky smile for you to snap out of it, cheeks warming and stomach churning at getting caught before you dropped your gaze right back down to your book.

it was a quick and thorough reminder that this is where you feel comfortable and this is where you belong - with your nose in a book and your mind on your studies. 

you’ve always intended to just get through high school with good grades and minimal distractions, a small (almost non-existent) friend group that left you able to make straight a’s and work a small, part-time job.

you’d done a pretty good job of that thus far, no bad boys covered in all black and sliver chains to show you that, maybe, getting out of your comfort zone isn’t such a bad thing after all.  

you met yeonjun during your 7th period study hall a week later than intended, him not showing up to either of the periods your teacher informed you both last week. 

you weren’t surprised in the slightest but also wouldn’t dare tattle on him, simply dodging the questions from your teacher or giving her a polite smile and cryptic answer. 

but you couldn’t even stop the way your eyes widened when the library door opened and he was making his way toward you, black beanie placed on his head along with a dark shirt tight across his chest paired with gray sweatpants that made you bite down on your lip.

his hair was pink now, long with a slight wave to it that looked all too soft and inviting to touch; the color probably shouldn’t work on anyone but, of course, it works on him. 

devastatingly attractive in a way that doesn’t seem fair nor human. 

he hasn’t said a word to you, he wasn’t even within six feet of you yet, but you were already scared shitless. you already didn’t trust yourself to be around him and not make a bumbling fool of yourself. 

a pretty smirk crossed his face when he stood in front of you, looking down at you with a playful look in his eye that was far too mocking and sinister. 

“hey. y/n, right?”

you never would’ve pictured this man saying (or even knowing) your name, nor him looking at you so willingly and intensely, but you have to quickly snap yourself out of it. 

this was as professional a relationship could be between two students and you really had to get it together. 

“hi, yes... that’s me,” you say softly. 

so softly that you’re not even sure he can hear it but you can, unfortunately, hear the tremor in your own voice and it’s nothing but absolute embarrassment. 

he happens to like it though, if the way his eyes light up and his smirk widens tells you anything. 

“i’m yeonjun.”

“i know.”

you say the statement far too quickly and it causes your face to warm, your mouth hanging open as the amusement continues to build behind his eyes; you can see with your own that the boy is too handsome for his own good but something tells you he’s probably far too charming as well. 

“i mean... we were supposed to meet last week,” you attempt to clarify.

it seems like a good save, something to make, both, your embarrassment lessen slightly and for him to know you’re aware that he missed the two sessions last week. 

but it doesn’t seem to work, the boy sitting down across from you with all the confidence and smoothness in the world. he leans in closer and you hold your breath, horribly lonely and touch-starved heart fluttering in your chest. 

“i know, sorry about that,” he says, a genuineness in his voice that you can’t help but question. “i was busy with some things.”

you don’t know what to say so you don’t say anything, not even wanting to think about what kind of things keeps a man like him busy.

your teeth sinks into your bottom lip nervously and you can just feel his eyes burning into you, moving across your pink face and down to your soft white sweater; it makes you look every bit as innocent as he’s presumed you to be and he can’t say it doesn’t make him smile. 

“and yet, the teacher didn’t say anything to me about missing.”

you meet his eyes at his questioning tone, so scrutinizing and intense that you feel very grateful about your decision not to blow up his spot; you don’t even wanna know what he looks like when he’s angry. 

or maybe you do, some darker and suppressed part of yourself thinks. 

“that’s because i didn’t tell her,” you say quietly, a lump forming in your throat that you’re trying desperately to push down. “i didn’t wanna....” 

you almost say tattle and you think your face wold turn an unnatural shade of red if that silly word left your mouth in front of him.

so you meekly and sweetly decide on, “i didn’t wanna get you in trouble,” a smile gracing his face that almost makes you feel like you’d done a good job or something. 

and how ridiculous does that sound? you did a good job for the older, delinquent boy - you don’t know what’s gotten into you. 

maybe his smile and his eyes and just the way he’s looking at you is making you feel as if you’re actually something to look at - you’ve never really been observed the way he’s observing you. 

a deep, melodic chuckle leaving his mouth causes you to swallow nervously, watching him with a blank expression because you’re not sure if he’s laughing at you or with you.

your heart stutters when he leans back to stretch, his arm squeezing at the back of his neck; it takes everything in you not to watch his arm flex.

“how’d i know you were a good girl, hm?”

your eyes widen at his words, stomach swooping in a way that’s only ever happened when you watch couples on tv or read about a romance in books. 

because it’s not only his words, it’s the way he carries himself. the way he’s looking at you and speaking to you, the way you never thought anyone would - let alone him. 

he must mistake your utter...shock and fascination for confusion, eyes wide and cheeks flushed and he suddenly wants to place his hand on your cheek. 

see if it’s as warm and soft as it appears to be in this very moment.

“you were in my lunch last year, no?” he hums, looking directly at you with zero ounce of fear and ever bit of confidence. “always with a textbook or writing something.”

he doesn’t remember all the girls that gawk at him but he remembered you immediately. 

caught your gaze early last year and saw something flicker in your eyes, a soft and innocent fascination he wasn’t used to seeing but immediately made him wanna ruin you - he wanted to ruin you and he didn’t even know you. 

he just knew that he’d watch you sometimes, discreetly and quickly, but enough to get his fix.

when he entered the cafeteria and made sure you were sitting there with your your face buried in a book. 

when you’d get up to buy lunch or a bottle of water, pull down your skirt or adjust your hair in a way that made him wanna touch you in a similar fashion.

when you’d leave five minutes early (in what he fantasized was so you wouldn’t be late) and send him one last glance. feel your soft, hesitant gaze on his face and meet it carelessly at the very last second.

just enough to watch you get shy and see the blush so similar to now cross your cheeks. 

he didn’t know your name and he, truthfully, never intended on learning it. because as much as he wanted to truly ruin you, he knew that’s all it was - a dark, twisted fantasy that someone like him shouldn’t act on. 

but then when he walked in and saw you here, the tutor he was dreading to meet in such a familiar position, he knew immediately that you were her. 

the cute girl from his lunch he wasn’t sure was an angel he wanted to protect or someone he wanted to fuck the shit out of. 

you weren’t sure what to think right now, not wanting to get your hopes up or think too much into his question - you were in my lunch last year, no?

think that you were special and he remembers you for reasons far too fantastical so you only nod, figuring he could be taking a guess; there’s only three lunch periods after all. 

“yeah. your hair was blue.”

a smirk crosses his face, chest warming at the fact you remembered him (even though the cocky, confident part inside of him knew you would). 

“yes it was,” he confirms, smiling down at you in a way that makes your heart jump and pound even more. ”i was hoping you’d remember. because i knew i recognized you from somewhere.”

you don’t know how you’re gonna do this. you can barely look at him, how are you supposed to talk to him and teach him twice a week and actually-

“i do wanna ask you something else though.”

your eyebrows pull together at the slight change in his voice, cocking your head to the side as you look at him.

he’s leaning in a little closer now, tiny pink strands hanging from his beanie as his brown eyes bore into yours. there’s still some amusement twinged in his eyes but it all looks very deceptive, unnerving a part of you that your stupid little heart is ignoring. 

he doesn’t allow you to ask him what before he starts talking again. 

“how about we keep these sessions the way they’ve been?” 

your eyebrow raises as confusion continues to plague you; your sessions haven’t even started? 

you haven’t even taught him anything, what could he possibly- but it’s the moment he opens his mouth to speak again, you realize that’s exactly the point. 

“you tell the teacher i’m coming to these and i’ll tell her what a good job you’re doing. how much i’m learning from you and shit.”

a smirk crosses his face when he peers into your eyes, catching the nervous, unsure look in them that only makes his smirk widen - you really are too cute. 

you, on the other hand, don’t know how you feel about his suggestion; you just know how you feel about lying. 

it doesn’t sit well with you and you don’t wanna get in trouble. 

the teacher has a class during this period so it’s not like she’d come down and check but it still makes you incredibly queasy. 

and if he needed tutoring in the first place, he obviously needs help. he’s a senior and needs to keep his grades up so he can graduate. it’d be your fault if he didn’t pass and you’d hate to be the reason he gets-

movement in front of you causes your thoughts to immediately stop, body freezing as you watch him lift his arm and bring his hand to your head. 

he moves a strand of hair from your face before smoothing out the slight crease in your forehead, biting down on his lip when he feels your skin is just as soft and smooth as he suspected. 

“what are you thinking so hard about?”

the deep, low tone of his voice and inquisitive look on his face is dangerous, almost as dangerous as the frantic beating of your heart and the way it’s about to pound out of your chest. 

it’s like he has electric sparks shooting from his hand, making you feel extremely exposed and vulnerable even though his touch is quite gentle and innocent.

“i.... it’s just....” you stutter out, taking a deep breath because you know you need to get it together fast. “you’ve been having trouble, right? that’s... why you needed tutoring in the first place.”

his eyebrow quirks up at your comment and for a split second, you think you’ve offended him. 

“i don’t want you to fail, yeonjun.”

he doesn’t allow himself to dwell on your words, realize that no one has so openly and sweetly said that to him before. or even cared enough to tell him that they don’t want him to fail.

he knows the teachers and counselors get him help because it’s their job. 

he knows his parents bitch and complain about it because they don’t want him repeating high school or wasting their money. 

he knows anyone who says anything to him about it is just doing it to make themselves look like a good person or friend. 

but you just so openly and sweetly said it, a deep concern in your eyes that he knows he can’t dwell on or his similar feelings are gonna arise from last year’s lunch.

where he’s about to throw caution to the wind and do anything and everything he wants to someone as innocent and sweet as you; but he can’t do that and he knows it, he knows that’s why these session can’t happen - on top of the fact that it’s not only you. 

he smokes during lunch and into this period. 

and there’s just no fucking way he’s spending that time suppressing his predatory attraction to you while learning about shit he doesn’t understand and being high as a kite. 

“you don’t gotta worry about me, angel,” he hums lowly, the name falling so naturally and smoothly from his mouth, he doesn’t even realize. “just do that for me, yeah? then you’ll have 7th free.”

you don’t hear much after he calls you angel, just that he’s asking you to do something for him and you’re blindly and dumbly nodding because he just called you that.

and it’s not until he smiles and thanks you deeply, looking over your face once more before saying that he’ll see you around that you realize you’re alone. 

sitting there as you watch yeonjun walk out the door without a glance back and come to terms with the fact you just agreed to lie to your teacher for him.

for almost a month, you were able to keep it up.

it was terrifying and debilitating and it almost sent you into a full blown identity crisis, but you’d somehow managed to do it.

that was until this afternoon, when your teacher cut through the cafeteria during lunch with a cup of coffee in hand and suspicion in the pit of her stomach. 

she saw you sitting there alone, your own books sprawled out around you as you wrote down notes before her short call of your name had your head snapping up. 

her eyes watching you quizzically made your own widen, stomach sinking and heart starting to pound as he she made her way over to you. 

“hi, y/n. where’s yeonjun today? it’s wednesday.”

the period only began ten minutes ago so it wouldn’t be weird for you to say that he wasn’t here yet. that he got held up after class and would be on his way shortly.

but you were just nervous and so bad at lying that you blurted out that he left to go to the bathroom, her eyes roaming the table in what you could only assume was for his books. 

“he took his backpack with him,” you tell her quietly, smiling softly in an effort to hide your guilt and distress. she only hums softly before nodding her head, taking your word for it because why wouldn’t she?

you’re good and studious and wouldn’t ever lie to a teacher.

but then when she comes down to the library next week during 7th period with her class, catching you at the table by yourself, you do it again. 

look her in the face and panic, make a scene of collecting your books as you tell her you forgot you guys were meeting in the cafeteria today - placing the blame on yourself.

you spent the rest of the period in the bathroom, collecting your thoughts and attempting to calm yourself down because you can’t keep lying. 

you haven’t even talked to yeonjun since the first time you met in the library, only seeing him in passing in the hallway or after school. 

he’ll send you a nod paired with his signature smirk and you’ll send him a small smile back, dipping your head before your cheeks flush at the mere sight of his eyes. 

you wish you hadn’t agree to this. 

you wish he didn’t effect you so much and you wish you could tell him you either need to actually help him or tell the teacher he doesn’t want to, because you’re losing your mind. 

you’re anxious and upset and not feeling good about yourself, barely able to look your teacher in the face these days. 

it’s on a friday before lunch, the bell ringing ready to dismiss you from her class, that it all comes crashing down.

she asked you to stay behind for a moment, everything about her face calm and neutral as you made your way over to her desk. 

you were anything but calm as you stood before her, that familiar feeling of dread and guilt rushing in your stomach as you smiled softly at her and asked if everything was okay. 

“yes, i just wanted to say what a great job you’re doing with yeonjun.”

you don’t even know what your face looks like but you know it’s probably the face of someone incredibly guilty, being praised for something you haven’t been doing and taking credit for it even though you know it’s wrong.

the feeling in your stomach confirms all of those feelings, tight and fluttery and buzzing with upset.

“o-oh?” 

“yeah,” she smiles tightly, looking over your face before speaking again. “we just took our third test and he did great. in the low 90s.”

a part of you desperately hopes that to be true, that maybe he started applying himself and somehow started to grasp the material all on his own. you smile at the thought that that’s the case, nodding your head as you, against your better judgment, keep up the facade. 

“i’m happy for him. he’s been working very hard. w-we studied at our last session for it, actually, and he really seemed to be understanding it.”

the contemplative look she gave you should’ve been the first sign that she knew you were full of shit, a quiet hum leaving her mouth. she holds your gaze until the moment you drop it, looking down at your white sneakers until she calls your name softly. 

“y/n... why have you been lying to me?” 

your lips press together as tears prick your eyes, all of the guilt and shame rushing through you at once. 

“he failed his test and i know you guys haven’t been meeting.”

she knows that because you can’t lie. she knows that because yeonjun still doesn’t know anything and all of the students she’s recommended to you have passed with flying colors. 

she knows because when you look up at her, your lip is trembling and it looks like you’re about to burst into tears.

“i... i’m so sorry.”

but even then, even after this moment right here, you’re still not gonna tell on yeonjun. because you don’t want him getting in trouble and you’re not gonna try to excuse your own behavior by admitting you agreed to it. 

you’re just as at fault as the older boy and you’re not gonna pretend you’re not. 

“why have you been lying? you could’ve just told me if you didn’t feel comfortable tutoring him or it wasn’t working out.”

because she knows yeonjun’s reputation. she knows he’s a year older and that you’re one of the shyer students in her class. she was hesitant at first to even put you two together but thought you’d be able to get through to him. 

and because you don’t know what to say, how to make up an excuse that puts neither of you at fault, you don’t say anything. just continue to apologize with teary eyes and a shaky voice before she eventually lets out a sigh. 

“take the next few days to figure it out. try to work on it with him or come to me and be honest that it’s not gonna work. but you didn’t have to lie to me, y/n. i’m a little disappointed in you.”

those words hit you harder than you care to admit, more tears building as you nod your head and quickly leave the room.

you knew from the beginning that it was wrong.

you never felt good about it and you knew it was bad but you still took part in it. she has every right to be disappointed in you and it feels like everything you worked so hard for has been ruined. 

now you look like a liar who can’t be trusted. 

now any time you tell her about another fellow student you’re working with, like the 7th grader you got through to or the 9th grader you helped get an a on their test, she’s gonna wonder if you really did that.

if you really helped them or if you’re just lying about that, too. telling them the answers to their homework or lazily explaining the concepts to them like you don’t work hard with each and every one of them. 

you’re surprised to see yeonjun when you make it to lunch a few moments later, your stomach still in knots and left over tears in your eyes. 

you don’t even realize you’re standing in front of his table until you hear one of his friend’s deep voices, a brash “who are you?” not even filling you with fear. 

you’re only looking at yeonjun pathetically, wide teary eyes and pouty lips in an effort to hold back more tears.

yeonjun’s dressed in his usual attire but you can’t even focus on that, his pink hair flawless against his black shirt and chain hanging around his neck as he adjusts it carelessly. 

soobin’s words catch his attention before your appearance does, looking at the front of the table and taking in the sight of wide, teary eyes and pouty lips; it pulls at something in his chest more than he cares to admit.

“yeonjun, can i talk to you for a second?” 

your voice is wobbly and timid and everything about it so incredibly embarrassing, the tears in your eyes obvious to all the young men around the table. 

you probably look like some girl he slept with and then left on read, begging him for another chance because your heart can’t take not being with him. because you got attached and now it feels like you need him. 

but, really, you just need him to let you tutor him. 

you can’t disappoint the teacher anymore and you had a job to do with him; you should’ve never told him that lying would be okay. 

“who’s this?” his friend asks with a smirk, his hair a bright shade of purple that looks striking next to yeonjun’s. 

“no one,” yeonjun’s quick to snap, looking at you before quickly getting up and guiding you out of the cafeteria by the small of your back. 

he walks down a secluded hallway and out to the garden of the school, looking at the tears in your eyes and feeling himself frown. 

“what happened?”

“i... she found out we haven’t been meeting,” you mumble, feeling silly and childish for crying in front of him about something like this; but you can’t help how you feel, you can’t help feeling sad and guilty about all of this. 

your heart drops when he actually smirks at you, looking over your face with a gaze that’s just as soft as it is amused.

you’re almost positive he’s about to laugh at you, call you a loser for crying over something as juvenile as getting caught in a silly lie and hurt your feelings even more. 

but then you’re quickly stiffening when his hand reaches up, gently brushing at your tears and marveling in just how soft your skin is. 

“that’s why you’re crying?” 

you’re embarrassed to say the least, any words you’d use to justify your reaction caught in your throat - and the smirk on his face isn’t helping either.

“you’re too pretty to cry over stupid shit like that, y/n.”

“it’s not stupid,” you respond, voice shaky and demeanor meek but still able to talk back. 

because it’s not stupid to you. wanting to be nice and studious and a good person isn’t stupid. not wanting to be a liar or someone who goes back on their word isn’t stupid. 

“she trusted me to help you and i lied to her.”

“we lied to her,” he says, voice and eyes teasing as he bends down to be on your level. you think he’s trying to make you feel better, a soft playfulness on his face that does anything but.

because you aren’t like him. 

you aren’t cool and feared and you can’t not care about how you effect other people. 

“why didn’t you just tell her it was my idea?” he asks suddenly, his eyes roaming your face in such a gentle but curious way. “she probably already knows that.”

“i... i didn’t want you to get in trouble.”

he rises to his full height as a small smile crosses his face, your soft voice and sweet words again effecting him far too much. he shouldn’t feel this way toward you and he shouldn’t want to be tutored now.

he shouldn’t be reaching out to touch the smooth skin of your cheek, a few stray tears making his lips fall into the smallest of frowns as you hear his voice the softest it’s ever been. 

“i wouldn’t get in trouble, angel.”

and there’s that word again. making your wet eyes widen and stomach to flutter, wondering how and why that simple word sounds so nice leaving his mouth. 

maybe because you’ve never been called that before. 

could only imagine being called that by someone, let alone him, in such a way. or maybe it’s because it is him, the boy you watched for months on end, forever fascinated by the way he carried himself. 

or maybe it’s because-

“but even if i did, how’s that your problem? why would you care?”

it’s a fair question you suppose but it doesn’t stop you from licking at your lips nervously, an all too familiar (and embarrassing) blush warming your cheeks. 

“i mean... it’s not,” you mutter shyly, not sure if you’re more intimidated by him calling you out or the look on his face. 

but even with those feelings, you’re still able to meet his gaze. 

take in the deep, dark intensity staring back at you in his brown eyes. they’re softer than one would expect, almost soft enough to make you forget what you were wanting to say. 

“but it’s just as much my fault as it is yours. so it didn’t seem fair.”

he smirks so he doesn’t say anything too brash, looking over the blush on your cheeks. his hand itches to move your hair behind your ear, a move he’d always do because he knew it was charming. 

knew it’d get him laid and get a girl’s heart fluttering.

but now he wants to do it just to touch you, feel your hair and skin and watch the blush on your cheeks deepen; but before he can do anything, he’s surprised to hear you speak anything.

“but it’s also not fair to keep lying,” you say softly, a broken little smile crossing your face as you look at him. “i actually really hated the lying... so if you don’t wanna do the sessions, i’m gonna tell her it’s not gonna work for us. but if you change your mind, i’m still free during those periods.”

at that moment, he had every intention of telling you no. 

he didn’t wanna give up his free time and energy to learn about things he’s absolutely sure he’s never gonna need to know after this. 

he didn’t wanna sit through the sessions high or not get high at all, the only way he’s able to cope with the last period of the school day knowing that he could roll a joint in his car with soobin. 

he didn’t wanna resist his obvious attraction and borderline fascination with you, act on it in a way he knows you’re not ready for and in a way he shouldn’t.

but when he walked in the library on monday, the time he told you he’d get back to you, you looked up and smiled at him. it was such a small, quick smile but everything about it called to him.

the twinge in your eyes and the way your hair fell, how even though your smile was small, it lit up your face and made you the prettiest girl he’d ever seen in his life.

at that moment, you were positive he was about to tell you no.

that thanks but no thanks, he’s absolutely not gonna spend his free period being tutored by a younger student who only stutters and blushes in his presence. 

but when he sat down in front of you, a smirk on his face and eyebrow quirked, you couldn’t even hold back your look of surprise. 

a deep chuckle left his mouth when he caught your expression, the sound one of the best noises you’ve ever heard.  

“what? did you think i wasn’t coming back, angel?”

it took you a month to see yeonjun was just as confident and just as much trouble as you’d expected. 

he was far too charming and attractive and funny, a sarcasm and wit in him that made you muffle your giggles like a middle school girl. 

you weren’t used to talking playfully with the people you tutored, always so focused on getting the work done and making sure you were doing a good job explaining the material for them.

but yeonjun always made sure to delay it, attempt to get to know you before you could even discuss his homework or review sheet; and even though it hasn’t been easy, he’s been persistent in breaking down that wall you put up.

“did the flashcards help or do you think you’re more of a-”

“why don’t you ever go out?”

you suppress the urge to let out a sigh as you turn to look at him, his expressive eyes looking over your face.

you’ve gotten used to the feel of his gaze on you, almost like it was burning into your skin and leaving you exposed to the bone, but it didn’t help when you made eye contact.

looked into his eyes and saw him looking back at you so confidently and so easily, you couldn’t help but feel flustered.

“what do you mean?”

you know exactly what he means but it’s the only thing you could think to say.  

you know more than anyone how much time you spend alone in your room, watching tv series and reading books and reorganizing until you don’t even recognize your own space.

but it’s not that you’re bothered by it, that’s what you like going. not going out isn’t something you find bad or upsetting.

“i mean i see people from your grade at our parties a lot,” he hums lowly, his eyes leaving yours only to look at the soft, pastel pink material of your sweater.

“but you’re never there,” he continues, looking at you and cocking his head to the side questioningly. “why’s that?”

“well, i’m not...invited, i guess,” you mumble out, ignoring the way your cheeks warm even more. “i like sticking to myself. and staying home.”

the words and your tone bring a pout to his face, your eyebrow raising at the sight. why is looking at you like that?

“well now you have an invite,” he says, a teasing smile crossing his face. “come to my friend’s party tonight. soobin, do you know him? he has the purple hair?”

his voice is far too sweet and soft compared to the look in his eye, teasing and flirty and reminding you of just how dangerous he is. how he’s capable of having so many different sides, he nearly gives you whiplash. 

he’s the bad boy everyone thinks of him to be, skipping class and getting high and ditching tutoring lessons by smiling too kindly at a mousy little tutor. 

he’s the play boy you see come out when he looks at you a second too long, bringing a blush to your cheeks and stirring something very unfamiliar in the pit of your stomach. 

but then he has a softer side you see sometimes, like when he decided to do these lessons in the first place because you cried to him and made yourself look even more pathetic. 

“i’m happy you decided to do these,” you say to him quietly. 

it was only your second session but you wanted him to know you were supportive of his decision. that, even if your word meant nothing (because, really, who are you to him?), you were proud of him.

it’s not easy for a senior to give up a period or two to learn about things they don’t understand; you probably wouldn’t wanna do it either, if school and learning didn’t come naturally to you. 

but for whatever reason, he agreed to do it.

“oh?” he hums, the trademark smirk on his face causing your cheeks to warm.

“yeah,” you smile softly, nodding your head before looking down at your clasped fingers. “i just... wanted you to know that. i understand why you didn’t want to but i think it’ll be good for-”

“why do you think i didn’t want to?” 

you look at him and for a split second you’re scared that you offended him. you suppose you don’t really know him well enough to make an assumption about him but you just assumed he-

“or, you know what, no,” he says, shaking his head as he pushes his chair closer to yours. 

he leans over the desk the same way he did during your first meeting last month, bringing your faces closer until you can smell cologne and the faint stench of cigarettes. 

“i wanna hear why you think i changed my mind?”

you quirk an eyebrow as you look at him, staring blankly until you realize he just plans on doing the same. 

“well... i guess it’s because you wanted to do good, right?” you ask meekly, unsure why he changed his mind but knowing that you were happy he did. “and maybe you didn’t wanna disappoint the teacher.”

a deep chuckle leaves his mouth that has butterflies erupting in your stomach, watching as he shakes his head and meets your gaze again. 

“is that no it?” you ask bravely, your wide eyes and confused look causing his own stomach to do flips. “what’s so funny?”

but he’s quick to push it down, reach over to ruffle your hair in a way that makes your eyebrows pull together. 

“nothing, angel,” he mumbles, his eyes roaming yours. you see the exact moment there’s s witch behind them, a flirty and darker front he puts up melting into a soft, vulnerable look.

“but thank you for telling me that. because i’m happy i’m doing them, too.”

he has yet to tell you the reason all these weeks later, probably because you wouldn’t dare ask again, but whatever it was, must’ve greatly inspired him.

because over these weeks, he’s really been putting in the work. writing notes and listening to you and asking questions when he’s not making you blush or inviting you out just for you to decline. 

“so...?” he asks, a charismatic smile stretching across his face as he looks at you awaitingly. “what do you say? you wanna come?”

“no, thank you,” you smile politely, feeling bad for downright denying it but the offer feeling far too similiar to cliche movies you’ve watched. where the popular boy invites the nerd to a party and everyone laughs at her, questions why the hell she’s here and pulls some stupid, immature prank on her.

but this isn’t a movie and you don’t think you even have the capacity to show your face there, nor would anyone care that much to target you. 

dismissing him is easier than really considering you hanging out with him outside of this library. seeing him in a different setting and allowing him to see a different side of you.

not you looking at him pleadingly, your eyes moving to the paper in front of him as you ask him to do the next question.

“i’ll do it if you come tomorrow night,” he says, a sigh leaving your mouth as you look at him in frustration.

“yeonjun...”

because if there’s another thing you’ve learned about yeonjun, it’s that he knows you have trouble saying no to him. it could because he sees the naivety in you, seeing something good in him at times and thinking you’ll really be able to help him.

but maybe he hopes you can help him, too. be a person he can lean on and know 100% is gonna be there for him. 

“c’mon, y/n, don’t you wanna have a little fun?”

“i don’t think i’d find it fun,” you mutter honestly, a pout forming on your lips that has him swearing he’s never wanted to kiss someone as much as he wants to kiss you in this moment.

just brush his lips gently against yours, hear the little sounds and see your reactions that he knows will be the best thing he’s ever had. hold your waist and feel your skin against his that while it’s juvenile to him would be so much to you. 

“you don’t know until you try, y/n,” he mutters lowly, looking up at him and seeing his gaze is, as usual, unrelenting. “have you ever been to a party before?”

of course you’ve been to parties before; birthday parties, graduation parties, wedding parties - but you’ve never been to a high school house party. 

and are you about to tell him that? absolutely not. 

“of course i have,” you mumble, a smirk on his lips because he can tell by the way you avert eye contact that you’re lying. “but it’s just... especially with kids from school who i don’t know? i don’t think it’d be fun, yeonjun.”

“but i’d be there?” he whines, something very uncharacteristic of someone who is known to be a bad boy. “isn’t that fun enough?”

you let out a groan as you frown again, tapping the notebook in front of you lightly as you meet his close gaze. 

“your test is next week, yeonjun. can you please focus on that right now?” 

it’s not until the next session that he thinks to use that to his advantage, supposing he can stand one more party without your presence as he smiles over at you. 

“let’s make a deal, angel.”

you know when he calls you that that you’re not about to talk about school or his test, looking over at him with a raised eyebrow. 

“if i get 100 on my test next week, you come to one of soobin’s party.”

you have to suppress a groan at the way he’s not letting up on this damn party, biting down on your lip as you do your best to give him a serious look.

“you should get the 100 because you want to, not because you’re trying to-”

his finger on your lips is the next thing you’re only able to focus on.

not the pounding of your heart or increasing anxiety at the thought of a party or  the fact that there’s more people in the library than usual today. 

you’re only aware of him touching you, a quiet “sh,” leaving his mouth that has your stomach fluttering far more than you care to admit. 

he meets your wide-eyed gaze and smirks at the look on your face. his finger presses down on your bottom lip gently, dragging it slowly and watching as it pops back up. 

there’s an almost pained look in his eyes that you can’t make out, his eyes never moving from your lips before meeting your gaze again. 

“i want a lot of things, y/n,” he says, his voice deep and gruff and making your heart pound even more as he looks to your mouth again. 

you feel your lower stomach swoop at the way he bites down on his bottom lip, his other hand ghosting over to rest of your knee. 

your uniform skirt comes just above your knees, becoming higher when you sit and perfectly exposing your tight covered legs. his large hand rests on your knee like it completely belongs there, like he’s gonna dare anyone to tell him it doesn’t belong there and to take his hands off you.  

“things i probably shouldn’t tell you yet so your pretty little face doesn’t become beat red,” he mumbles in your ear, his warm breath fanning onto your skin and making a shaky, embarrassing sigh leave your mouth.  

but just him realizing that makes your cheeks flush. everything about his closeness and his words and the way he’s just saying these things to you right in the middle of the library. 

the way his hand is slipping inside of your knee, fingers resting on the inside of your thigh that has some dirty, repressed part of you desperate to spread your legs just a little bit more for him.

feel more of his skin on you and heighten the feeling building in your lower half. 

“but i can assure you, none of them are an on my test. but if that means getting you to spend time with me outside of this fucking hellhole, i’m gonna do it.”

just as fast as his hand was on your thigh, it’s gone and cupping your face. holding on to your jaw as he makes you look at him and has a look of softness and amusement but also darkness and arousal. 

it probably has every bit to do with the fact you let out a tiny squeal when he did so, your eyes widening and legs now spreading apart ever so slightly. 

“do you understand now?” 

you should have the power here being his tutor but you don’t. you’re the cat and he’s the mouse, you’re the prey and he’s the predator and you’re not about to do anything to stop it. 

“ye-yes yeonjun,” you say, a groan almost leaving his mouth at you how compliant you are already. 

and it’s that reaction right there that has him skipping the party on friday and spending his weekend doing something he never thought he’d do his senior year - making flashcards and studying his ass off. 

you remember being incredibly proud when, two weeks later, yeonjun came to your session with his graded test paper in hand. 

he looked happy and accomplished and ready to take on the world, a warm feeling blooming in your chest at the look on his face.

“how’d you do?” you smiled up at him, your eyes soft and expression excited.

when he flipped the test over to reveal his 100% test, your first instinct was to raise your hand for a high five. it’s what you always did with the younger kids, praising them and sharing their excitement over a test that they worked incredibly hard on.

so when you did the same thing to him, quickly realizing he’s not one of your 7th grade students but an absurdly attractive man, your cheeks flushed and you stuttered out a “sorry.”

but he only chuckled lightly and high-fived you immediately, lacing your fingers from across the table before you could pull away. the action caught you off guard more than your nerdy high-five, eyes looking down to your conjoined hands before you gave him an incredulous look.

“what are you doing?” you squeak out, fearing that your hand’s about to get clammy and your heart may explode.

“don’t tell me you don’t remember our deal?”

you realized before you even entered soobin’s house that you made a grave mistake. 

music was pounding through the open windows of the house and a few people were littered across the lawn. a drunken couple sloppily making out while another one fought about someone dancing with a stranger all before ten p.m.

you truly intended on never coming, telling yeonjun you seriously could not go through with this and had to flake out on your deal. 

but he’d been so proud of his test. not just because it meant you were coming but because it showed him he was actually capable - or at least, that was the story he told you.

and whether you were silly and naive to believe him was on you since now, you’re walking into a party looking like someone’s holding a weapon to your back. 

“so i’ll see you tonight, right?” 

you were still hesitant even during 7th period this afternoon, looking at yeonjun with a pained expression. 

“yeonjun... i really don’t know if i can do it.”

“why not? i’m gonna be there, just for you.”

you swallow down a bold, sassy remark that he’s gonna be there anyway, probably to remind your fluttering heart not to think too much into his comment. 

but is him being there enough to make you go? or is that scaring you more? seeing him outside of school, around his friends, in an environment where he can be even more bold and daring. 

after all, being in the school library didn’t stop him from creeping his hand up your inner thigh.

“i don’t just wanna follow you around all night and bother you like a lost puppy,” you whine quietly, knowing this was part of the deal but seeing just how impossible it is. 

“how could you think you’d bother me?” he asks, his head cocked to the side just as the bell ringing interrupts you. 

you let out a sigh as you stand to gather your books. you can feel his watchful eyes on you, attempting to ignore it as you silently get ready to go to next period. 

he mistakes you walking away from the table to throw out a stray sheet of paper as you leaving, quickly rising from his feet and pulling you back into him. your body collides with his before he presses you against the table, the library nearly empty as the loud chatter of students can be heard from the hallways. 

“were you gonna leave without answering me?”

his voice is deep and has a certain dominating darkness behind it, your eyes raising to his just in time to see him cock an eyebrow up. 

“i... i was gonna throw this out,” you answer dumbly, raising the crumpled up paper behind your back. 

he hums thoughtfully before taking it from your hand, crumbling it up and tossing it in the nearest garbage can. he misses but makes no attempt to pick it up, keeping you pinned between him and the table with no qualms about it. 

“you missed,” you point out obviously. 

a smirk crosses his lips as he lets out a hum, bringing his hand up to smooth out a piece of your hair. 

“i’m gonna ask again,” he mumbles lowly in your ear, his large body and deep voice quickly making your breaths quicken. 

“how could you think you’d bother me when i spent my entire weekend studying for that test?” he asks, his hands snaking down your body before gently resting onto your hips. 

him pulling you closer causes another shaky sigh to leave you, your low, warning mumble of his name only making him smirk. he shouldn’t like this so much, how you sound so sweet and flustered and are allowing him have you like this. 

“that was all for you, angel. not for me or the teacher or my parents or anyone else. just you. because i wanna hang out with you.”

you swallow the nervous lump in your throat as you raise your eyes to meet his, the playfulness that was in them turning the slightest bit dark. something in them making you lick over your lips as you try to calm your racing heart.

“you won’t even know when i’m there. how am i gonna find you?”

it’s the worst excuse you could have ever thought of but you’re not surprised since yeonjun was pressed against your body and breathing down your neck the way he was. 

he chuckled lowly like he also knew it was the worst excuse you could’ve thought of, taking your phone from the table. he slides it open and looks to you, his eyebrow raised when you just continue to stare at him blankly. 

then you remember, like every other teenager in the world, you have a lock on your phone.

“0319.”

he smirks at how easily you give it up, tapping a few buttons on the screen before handing it back to you.

“i put my number in there. text me when you’re there, 

so even with a pit in your stomach and anxiety coursing through your veins, you go to his new contact name and type out “i’m here.”

you’re faintly aware of the fighting couple’s voices growing louder, his deep groans mixed with her higher pitched whines causing you to look over. 

“i saw you touch her waist!” the girl yelps, her hands on her hips with a very obvious look of distaste. “so obviously you didn’t mind! maybe you should dance with her the rest of the night!”

“maybe i will, since you’re so god damn annoying,” he yells back, your lips falling into a frown. 

the girl meets your gaze and it’s then you recognize her as a girl in your grade. she’s from the popular group but is one of the nicer ones, always smiling politely at other students and listening to teachers during their lessons. 

she almost looks embarrassed to be caught in this scenario, a broken smile crossing her face before her boyfriend notices your gaze; you don’t recognize him, so you think he must be in yeonjun’s grade. 

“what the fuck are you looking at?”

your cheeks flush as you immediately snap your head away, quickly becoming scared and uncomfortable. you can hear her chastising him but just want to be away as soon as possible, the prospect of this drunk man cursing at you somehow worse than a house full of strangers.

yeonjun hasn’t answered your text but you still take a deep breath as you walk toward the front door, immediately hit with the scent of alcohol, b.o. and weed. there’s loud music blaring from the speakers and making the house vibrate, bodies littered throughout the house as they all talk loudly and dance.

your eyes scan the room for his pink hair, stomach sinking when you see no sign of him. 

is he even here yet? he told you he was coming at nine but could he be running late? or did he forget entirely, ignore your text as a joke and now you have to-

“hey. how do i know you?” 

the first thing you see is purple hair and you’re immediately thrown back into the crowded cafeteria all those months ago. when you so boldly went up to yeonjun with tears in your eyes and he was quick to pull you away. 

you remember the boy in front of you asking who you were, the same curiosity in his eyes now as you stand in his house looking extremely uncomfortable and out of place. 

“i... my name’s y/n,” you begin quietly, the boy barely able to hear you over the music and loud chatter. “i had to talk to yeonjun during lunch once so i went up to your table and-”

“well shit, so you’re her.”

there’s a smirk on his face and gleam in his eye, like he knows something you don’t. you cock your head to the side in confusion, watching as his smirk widens and he nods his head approvingly. 

“his tutor, right? he told me about you.”

“oh... yeah,” you say quietly, because yeah, that would make sense - his friends probably wonder where he goes during his free period now; there’s a few beats of awkward silence before he speaks up again.

“so what are you doing here?”

your cheeks flush and you wish you could blame the stuffiness of his house, looking to him as you stutter out that yeonjun invited you. 

“did he now,” he hums, his eyes roaming your face and stopping on your cheeks. he doesn’t know what exactly yeonjun wants from a girl like you but he has to be honest in saying he sees the appeal. 

“follow me then, sweetheart. you want a drink?”

you shake your head before following behind him, making eye contact with one too many intimidating boys and girls before landing on your feet. everyone’s in pretty heeled boots and crop tops, dancing and singing and grinding like they don’t have any cares in the world. 

like they’re not terrified and dreading being here, even with the knowledge that the attractive boy they may or may not have developed a crush on is lingering  around.

“oh, yeonjunnie,” you hear soonbin whine sarcastically, your eyes shooting up just in time to see his familiar black attire. his pink hair is poking out of his black beanie, the chain around his neck hanging low as he turns to look at his friend. 

“i found someone for you,” the boy says before yeonjun can respond, bringing you around to the front. 

you’re in the middle of both boys who tower over you and you’re not sure if you’ve ever felt more threatened; especially because when yeonjun looks at you, you’d think he didn’t know your name. 

because he doesn’t give you a hi or a smile or even a flicker of recognition in his gaze.

he looks at you and simply says, “well, shit, i didn’t think you’d actually come,” with such a handsomely conniving smirk, you’re not sure what to think in that moment. 

because it seems as if all your silly, irrational fears are coming true in this moment. very much like the movies you’ve seen and scenarios you’ve pictured where you’re humiliated at a party or by the popular boy. 

but his smile and his words seemed so genuine. he’s seemed so genuine getting to know you these past few months, how could he have faked it so well? 

the way your face drops and cheeks warm cause his heart to break a little, still all too aware of the questioning eyes and lingering looks thrown your way. 

“didn’t you invite her?” soobin questions, looking between you and him and noting how embarrassed you look.

“i did,” is all yeonjun responds. no rhyme or reason or answer as to why he did. just that he did. so it could very well be a joke. 

“well then, welcome, y/n,” soobin responds, reaching his hand out to you. “i’m soobin, in case we weren’t formally introduced.”

you give him a tight smile, yeonjun’s piercing gaze on yours as you take soobin’s large hand in yours. 

“nice to meet you.”

your voice is soft and shaky and brings more heat to your cheeks, wanting to die when soobin rips up one of his friends for you to sit on the couch.

“i don’t mind standing,” you insist, shaking your head and offering a small smile to the other boy.

“no, no, pretty girls shouldn’t stand,” soobin says with a smirk, catching the way yeonjun’s eyes roll and jaw clenches; it all goes unnoticed to you, though, too busy sitting down and looking at your hands nervously folded into one another.

“so y/n,” soobin says, sitting down across from you and leaning forward the same way yeonjun does during his tutoring sessions. “what’s it like to tutor this idiot?”

his words are laced with affection, as are his actions as he ruffles yeonjun’s beanie playfully, but they still make you frown. still make you wanna defend him in front of others and ensure that he’s not an idiot. 

“he’s great actually,” you say softly, lips pulled up in a soft smile. “very smart and learns fast. definitely not an idiot.”

you look to the boy to see him staring blankly at you, heart sinking in your chest; you’re becoming increasingly uncomfortable in this environment and a big part of it as to do with his attitude. 

you weren’t expecting him to be overly excited, kiss your feet upon seeing you arrive or proclaim an irrational excitement. but it kind of seems as if, right now, he could care less that you’re here.

“ahh, that’s cool then,” soobin smiles. “you’re a year younger than us, right?” 

you can only hum a small “mhm,” yeonjun’s gaze burning into your face causing you to look at him. 

it’s the same soft, wide-eyed look you give him during your sessions but right now, it’s making him feel far too unsettled. like people seeing him with you are gonna show them a different side to him he has yet to acknowledge. 

“why’d you decide to come?” he asks, not being able to stop the words; he already knows the answer, he basically begged you too. 

and because you’ve been nothing but sweet and soft to him, he’s not surprised when you don’t throw it in his face that he’s the one who enforced this. that he studied for nights to pass that test so you’d feel inclined to come. 

“i thought it’d be fun,” you say sweetly, i thought we’d be able to have fun outside of school like you claimed to have wanted. “i don’t really come to parties a lot.”

“i can’t imagine why, you seem really sweet and funny,” soobin says, a flirty smile on his face that makes a blush creep up on your cheeks; he’s so bold and confident, you don’t know both of them do it. “you should come to more.”

seeing that shade of pink on your cheeks from someone else angers yeonjun more than he cares to admit, throwing his friend a dirty look before growling at him to shut up. 

“why? she’s sweet, isn’t she? maybe i need to be tutored too,” soobin says, throwing a smile your way as he plops down in the spot next to you. “what periods are you free? maybe we can go out for lunch and have a session.”

“i... i’m not allowed to leave for lunch.”

that’s a school rule - only seniors are allowed to leave for lunch. but with the way soobin laughs and yeonjun hold back a smirk, the other people littered around also letting out soft chuckles, it appears that’s something not many people follow. 

“you can with me,” soobin assures, patting your knee softly as he sends another charming smile your way. “i’ll make sure you don’t get in trouble.”

you smile in an effort to downplay your embarrassment and discomfort, an annoyed sigh leaving yeonjun as he rises from his seat. he looks even more big and broad surrounded by these people for some reason, in his element where he fits in like a glove.

it’s even more evident that you don’t fit in here - at least in the library, that’s a place you belong. the quiet, the smell of books, the solidarity, a keen sense of-

“i’m getting another drink.”

yeonjun’s words are short and deep as he quickly gets up, hauling ass to the kitchen before anyone can even respond to him. his friend must see the look on your face too, a small pout on your lips that has the boy frowning next to you.

“don’t worry about him, he’s grouchy tonight,” soonbin says reassuringly, wrapping his arm around you affectionately. “some girl stood him up.”

the first thing you feel is a blow to your chest, an unfamiliar pain right in the center as you register soobin’s words; he begged you to come tonight but was waiting for another girl.

probably one of the many college girls, who are prettier and funnier and more charismatic than you.

so, really, you can’t be surprised. you were silly to think he liked you in the way you thought, in the way you’ve come to discover you like him because he makes you smile and laugh and feel warm inside.

but even so, you’re hurt.

you’re hurt and embarrassed and feel humiliated even though no one knows the real reason you came here and stepped way out of your comfort zone. thank god for that, you think, because it’d be even more horrible if people knew you came for yeonjun, all while he was waiting for someone else.

“oh,” you manage to squeak out, a soft look on your face despite the pain and embarrassment inside of you. “that’s too bad.”

“yeah,” soobin says, looking at you with sympathetic eyes you know you can’t trust. “he’ll be good, though.”

you bet he will, you think, because that’s just who choi yeonjun is. he doesn’t care who he strings along or makes believe is special - he’s gonna do what he wants when he wants it with no regard for how it effects other.

even a sweet little meek tutor he was able to get under his thumb the first day he met her.

when yeonjun returns, he can tell immediately that something is wrong with you. your hands are clasped together and you’re biting the inside of your cheek, fiddling nervously as you listen in on the conversation around you.

you meet his gaze and he’s quick to look away, one because he got caught and two because he doesn’t know if he can handle the look in your eye right now.

you’re always almost about to make him crack, break down into being someone worthy of you, and he doesn’t wanna do that tonight. doesn’t wanna show everyone here that, if he wants to, he can be a worthy person.

you’re a second away from breaking before soobin asks if you wanna dance, a tight smile on your face as you shake your head.

“i... i’m actually gonna go outside for a sec,” you say, knowing full well you’re gonna book it to your car and never return. “it’s hot in here. i need some air.”

“there’s plenty of air in here, angel,” soobin remarks, your eyes widening at the term.

it sounds different coming from his mouth, not as deep and melodic and it doesn’t let off a bunch of butterflies in your stomach. you’re too busy giggling softly as you shake your head that you don’t hear the deep, low noise of distaste leave yeonjun’s mouth.

you only see him grab soobin’s arm when he tries to get up to follow you, a lowly growled “let her go,” that makes your eyebrows pull together; you don’t know if he’s trying to hurt your feelings on purpose but he’s certainly doing it a lot tonight.

it feels like you can finally take a deep breath when you get outside, no one around except the chilly air and starry sky. it makes you feel a bit better, sinking down on the stairs and humming contently when your hands meet the cold concrete.

you passed by the dancing people and laughing, smiley couples inside and felt silly for coming here. silly for thinking yeonjun wanted you in his life without him getting something out of it.

what would he want from you anyway? what could you possibly give him when he’s already had so much better?

tears prick your eyes and you bury your face in your hands, taking deep calming breaths so the harsh winter air doesn’t feel like it’s burning you.

you avoided boys and feelings like this for so long and with good reason; you’re too sensitive and naive and always try to see the good in people.

you’ll put your feelings aside in order to spare someone else - you saw it in the beginning, pushing down your qualms about lying to the teacher to further appease a boy you found cute.

and when you put it like that, it sounds really fucking stupid. it sounds like, maybe, you’re just-

“didn’t i tell you you’re too pretty to cry over stupid things?”

your first instinct is to turn around when you hear his voice, his tall, dark figure looming behind you. 

you should probably smile shyly or say that you’re not crying but you can only stay silent, turning back around to avoid his intense gaze and your own humiliation. 

the same way he should probably go inside and carry on with his night the way he usually would. drinking and flirting and dancing before he probably brought someone home or into the bathroom. 

when he moves behind you, that’s what you think he’s about to do. 

but then he’s walking around your sitting frame and bending down to you, looking up at you from his crouched position. his hand reaches out to touch your face, forcing it up so you can only stare at him with teary eyes and flushed cheeks.

there’s a frown on his face as he runs his thumb across your cold cheek, his gentle touch a shocking contrast to his harsher appearance. 

“what happened?”

what happened? you think, not used to feeling so snarky and hurt. what happened was that he got your hopes up, was nice to you and invited you and kept making you feel special, just for them to come crashing down.

but then the more you think about it, the silence between you getting longer and longer, the guiltier you feel - because your feelings aren’t his fault.

you taking his looks and kindness and lingering touches for something deeper was a mistake. you know the kind of boy he is and have still been foolish enough to fall for him.

“nothing,” you grumble, a wet, humorless laugh leaving you as you shake your head. “i’m just being silly.”

but you can’t look up from your feet, your eyes roaming the cracks in the concrete, and that’s how he knows you’re lying; that, and because he knows he was being a fucking dick. 

but seeing you in this environment was weird for him. seeing people look at you and look at him, specifically soobin who got it out of him that he might like you, was unfamiliar for him.

the same way this was unfamiliar for you - which is why he wants you to talk to him. 

“what happened, y/n?” he asks, voice a tad bit harsher and deeper as he cranes his neck down. he hears your harsh, nervous intake of breath and resists the urge to reach out and touch you. 

you need to answer him before he can touch you. 

but you never do. not after ten seconds and not after a minute, prompting him to let out a sigh and pop his neck to the side. your face pulls into a grimace at the crack that sounds through the air. 

his cold hand touching your face causes you to jump, your eyes meeting and a lump forming in your throat; his eyes fool you too much and that’s exactly the problem here.

“talk to me, angel, c’mon.”

your eyes start to burn when a harsh wind passes, tears stinging your eyes and coldness rushing over your face. why does he have to keep calling you that? why does his voice have to sound so sincere and why does he have to look at you the way he is right now?

like he cares so much and hopes those tears aren’t because you’re sad.

“there’s nothing to talk about, yeonjun,” you blurt out, anger and humiliation seep into your tone before you can stop it. you let out a sigh as you try to get it together, taking a few calming breaths before shaking your head. 

“just go back inside, okay? i’m going home. t-thank you for inviting me but i-”

“i don’t want you to go.”

he blurts the words so loud and fast, it even sounds a little awkward to your ears. but he sounds and looks almost desperate, your eyebrows pulling together and heart sinking as you take a deep breath.

because you know you can’t stop the next words from tumbling out of your mouth.

“well, it doesn’t seem like you want me here.”

your words are soft and quiet but they still physically pain his chest, his eyes roaming your face as he brings them to your cold cheeks. he wipes under your eye when wetness forms, the cold biting wind rushing around you both. 

“i want you,” he reassures quietly, his voice just as low and gravely as he speaks hushly to you; he thinks it’s the most honest and true thing he’s ever said to someone. “i want you more than you know.”

“then why are you acting like that?” you question sweetly, the pout on your lips nearly making him groan and cover them with his. “you were being... mean. i felt like... you didn’t want me here at all. or didn’t want people to know you invited me.”

your words break his heart but he also knows they’re true, his fingers caressing your face gently. he notices then how freezing and red it is, looking you over and rising from his feet.

you look disappointed that he’s gonna leave, your face falling and eyebrows furrowing before he reaches his hand down to you. 

“let’s talk in my car,” he clarifies, nodding his head toward his vehicle. “it’s freezing out here.”

you bite down on your lip, contemplating it for a few seconds before another harsh gust of wind passes. you let out a sigh as you take his hand, grateful to enter his car the moment you sit down. 

he turns it on and the engine roars to life, his fingers reaching out to turn on your heated seat. 

the next few moments only consist of the car’s engine warming up as you wait for the heat to kick on, you and yeonjun stealing glances back and forth at each other; you both miss the others gaze by a few seconds and if anyone were to be watching, it’d be obvious you both were nervous right now. 

dancing along the line you’re both nervous to cross for entirely different reasons - you because you somehow don’t think he reciprocates those feelings and him because he knows you deserve more. 

but in this moment, he decides he has to be selfish. watching you with a flush in your cheeks and your lip drawn into your mouth.

“i like you, y/n. that’s why i wanted you here,” his voice says, breaking the silence in a way that almost seems more terrifying. “but that’s also why i didn’t... want people knowing.”

your eyebrows pull together and immediately your mind goes to him being embarrassed. embarrassed that you’re younger and quiet and that no one really knows who the hell you are.

he’s infamous and cool and a senior, obviously he should be with someone similiar. like a popular girl in his grade or a college girl or maybe even a the girl who stood him up.

“not because of you, angel, but because of...”

“you?” you interrupt, a snark in your tone neither of you except; but you’ve heard this line one too many times, not expecting to ever ever hear it real life, let alone toward you. 

“it’s not you, it’s me?” you ask, a gentle, faux smile on your face as you shake your head at him. “is that what you’re about to say?”

he clenches his jaw so he doesn’t smirk, resisting the urge to laugh as he looks you over carefully. it’s obvious your smile’s fake because it doesn’t meet your eyes, the teary glint in them every bit sad as they are frustrated. 

but of course, you’re too sweet to treat him as he deserves. 

his hand reaches out to grab your chin, his thumb and pointer finger on either side as he forces your gaze to his. his smirk comes through when he hears your sharp intake of breath, tongue peeking out to lick at his lips. 

“if you let me talk, angel, you’d know what i was about to say,” he hums quietly, his breath fanning into your face at his closeness. it smells of mint and beer, it should probably be gross but surprisingly isn’t.

his words successfully stir you into silence, partially from fear and partially because the look in his eye has caused you to grow warm all over; and once he sees that, he begins to speak again.

“i didn’t want people knowing because i didn’t want anyone fucking with you, y/n. because if they did, i’d have to ruin them and then everyone would see it.”

“see what?” you ask quietly, the air between you thick and buzzing as you hold his gaze. 

hold it so adamantly and intensely, you’re barely able to register him leaning closer. inch by inch by inch, until his lips are pressed against yours and you’re kissing choi yeonjun in the front seat of his car. 

you’re stiff and awkward and don’t really know what to do but it’s fine because he laces his fingers in your hair and pulls you closer. parts your lips with his tongue which causes you to kiss him back with a slow, unsure pace.

but it only causes him to smile, retracting his tongue and keeping it sweet before he pulls back and rests his head on your forehead. 

“why i decided to spend my free period during senior year getting fucking tutored, angel,” he chuckles lowly, his hand running through your hair gently. 

the soft look in his eye causes you to swallow nervously, words caught in your throat as you stare at him wide-eyed.

“i... i thought you... you said it was...” you let out a shaky breath as you try to get your thoughts together, completely unable to remember your conversation from weeks ago. when he cryptically asked you your thoughts about just why he agreed to stop lying to the teacher and do the sessions; 

so instead, your cheeks warm and you’re hit with the reminder that you just had your first kiss with him. and that you were probably absolutely terrible at it. 

“that was my first kiss. i... i’m sorry if it was bad.”

a small smile crosses yeonjun’s face as he shakes his head at you, thumb dragging down your cheek gently to feel the warm, smooth skin of your cheek. 

“it was perfect, angel, you’re perfect.” he mumbles, your eyes widening and heart stuttering as a ball forms in your throat. “so perfect that i thought you stood me up and weren’t coming. so let’s go on date. a real date, this time.”

in the beginning of the school year, you would’ve never imagined your study sessions with yeonjun would be turning into dinner dates; but as you sit in your room and get ready, your heart pounding and palms sweaty, that’s exactly what’s happened. 

it’s the fourth date you guys are going on and you can officially say that you really, really have feelings for yeonjun. you’re still shy and nervous around him but it’s only because he’s more comfortable with you too.

he takes your hand with ease and laces your fingers together that he was meant to do that.

he’ll shamelessly peck a kiss to your lips and deepen it at any given time, your cheeks burning and embarrassed voice telling him to stop when he did it in the middle of the bowling alley last week. 

he’ll watch you and smile at you and just touch you with the softest of intentions, you almost can’t believe this is the bad boy everyone claims is so mean and heartless. 

you say almost because you still don’t do it in school. it’s still a somewhat... secret fondness you have for one another. he’ll play with your fingers under the table during sessions and wink at you in the hallway but that’s about it. 

he’d probably never kiss you in the hallway or cafeteria but you also wouldn’t want that. it would draw way too much attention and probably leave your face with a permanent, embarrassing flush. 

“are you going out?” you hear your mom ask, her head peeking in before a smile brightens her face. “aw, you look beautiful, y/n. yeonjun must be coming soon.”

the topic of dating had been undeniably embarrassing with your parents, mostly because they couldn’t believe you were showing an interest. but they welcomed yeonjun with open arms, insisting to meet him at the front door to ensure he was a nice boy.

and oh had he really showed you just how charming he could be. 

“mom,” you whine in embarrassment, her laugh echoing in your room as he throws her arms up defensively. 

“you guys be careful. it’s supposed to rain soon.”

you nod your head as you finish getting ready, smoothing over your hair once more before your phone vibrates against your desk. he texted you that he was on his way with a smiley face and heart, sending one back before looking at yourself in the mirror. 

you don’t know what the hell he sees you or why he likes you but you know if you dwell on it, you’ll talk yourself out of everything. convince yourself that this is all a joke and he’s gonna turn around and say he pities you. 

even though, when you brought this up to him, he was quick to calm those worries. 

“c-can i ask you something, yeonjun?”

you were walking home from the movies with your hands intertwined.

the cold, harsh winter had blossomed into spring, the night air growing less frigid; there was a still a bit of a chill but it was nothing a jacket and yeonjun’s warm body couldn’t fix.

“of course, angel,” he mumbles lowly, a small smile on his face as you stop in your tracks. he’s quick to follow, eyebrow raising and body turning so he can look down at you. 

he cocks his head to the side when you don’t speak for a few seconds, his lips falling into a pout as his hand tightens in yours.

“you okay?” he asks quietly, thumb tracing small circles into your skin. 

you lick over your lips nervously, feeling silly for the need to ask this question but it’s one you can’t help. it wracks your mind over and over again and it feels like you’re about to-

“why do you like me?” you blurt out, unaware you even said the words until you notice yeonjun’s face morph into one of surprise. 

his mouth opens and closes for a moment, brows pulled together as he tries to make sense of your words.

“i mean, what’s not to like?” he asks softly, taking you by the hips and pulling you closer to him. 

you’re in the middle of the sidewalk but there’s no one around, the sky dark and streets desolate as you both meet each others gazes - yours full of doubt and his full of confusion. 

“i... i don’t know,” you mumble sheepishly, looking down at your intertwined hands. “i just... it doesn’t really make sense.”

“why? because i’m older? because you’re smart and i’m not?” he teases, your panicked eyes immediately meeting his.

“no! more like the exact opposite,” you clarify as you shake your head. “because you’re popular and attractive and charming and i’m just.... not.”

his eyes roam your face and his heart sinks when he sees the doubt and nerves continue to grow. how you really feel this way about yourself and are pondering the idea that someone like him would want someone like you, when really, it should be the opposite. 

“y/n, i’m lucky that you’re settling for me,” the pink-haired boy laughs out, squeezing your hips reassuringly. “you’re good and sweet and so fucking beautiful. i wanted you the second i saw you, you know, but knew i shouldn’t.”

your eyes widen at his words, shock behind them that has a laugh bubbling from his chest. 

“in lunch. i noticed you the first day and thought you were an angel,” he says, the nickname he always calls you particularly getting the butterflies going tonight. 

“i could tell that you were good. you just have this.. aura, y/n, and i knew that i would taint it. i knew you deserved someone way better. because i’m not good like you.”

"yes you are,” you respond immediately, a frown appearing on your face as you shake your head. “you pretend not to be, but you are, yeonjun. i can see it.”

“you can see it because i wanna be good around you, baby. i wanna be someone good for you.”

tears prick your eyes as a lump forms in your throat, overwhelmed and unsure of how to respond to that. he smiles softly as he takes in your face, leaning forward to press his lips against your forehead. 

he inhales your sweet, vanilla smell while you take in his cologne and faint scent of cigarettes, swallowing down the lump and praying you don’t burst into tears on the spot. 

“don’t doubt yourself, angel,” yeonjun mumbles against your head, puling you closer until your flush against his warm, broad body. “i’m the one who got lucky here.” 

even though it meant wasting away in the fucking library. 

“the library isn’t that bad, yeonjun,” you whine ten minutes later in his car, heat blasting and music low as he drives to the restaurant. one hand’s on the steering wheel while the other’s laced with yours, your body turned in his black leather seat to look over and chastise him. 

he confessed to you that your sessions were the first time he’d ever stepped foot in that library; he hadn’t even been positive that school had a library until he walked through the door that day. 

“it smells like dust and the librarian’s a bitch.”

“she is not!” you squeal, smacking his arm lightly as you throw him a chastising look. “she’s just a little... misunderstood. people don’t respect her space.”

even you can admit sometimes she does go a little overboard; you saw her once lecture a younger student for a half hour because they mistakenly put a book on the wrong shelf. 

“you’re too nice, baby. maybe even a little biased, since you’re the only one she seems to tolerate.”

“probably because i’m there every day,” you tease lightly, your eyes widening playfully before a loud crack of thunder causes you to jump in your seat.

your mom hadn’t been kidding when she said there was gonna be a storm tonight. you’d ran to yeonjun’s car shielding the top of your head, rain pelting down and wind howling as your mom’s “be careful!” got drowned out.

and right now, it only seemed to be getting worse. 

“you scared of thunder?” 

you hear the smirk in yeonjun’s voice and resist the urge to stick your tongue out, not about to admit that, yes, you’re nearly an adult but still terrified of rain and thunder. 

“no, of-of course not,” you grumble, snatching your hand away from his. “it just surprised me.”

yeonjun looks over at you and sees the nervousness all your face, not commenting as he silently snatches your hand back. he intertwines your fingers as he raises your hand to his mouth, pressing his lips against it while he drives through the rain.

it’s getting considerably heavier by every second, his foot pressing off the gas every time he drives past a puddle. 

“i used to be scared of the rain, you know.” 

you look over at him and see him looking peacefully at the road, pink strands of hair hanging in his face. 

“oh, yeah? when you were like five?”

“twelve,” he corrects with a smile, doing his best to distract you from the chaos outside. “i used to wake up crying, sometimes. i know that’s hard to believe now. because i’m so cool and what not.”

“oh please,” you giggle out, the sweet sound filling the car also distracting him from the pounding of rain and crackling of thunder; he’s outgrown his fear of storms but even he can admit this one is a little bit scary right now. 

“what, you don’t think? i’ll have you know-”

the skidding of his tires mixed with your frightened screams is the next thing he hears, a strangled “yeonjun!” in the background as he attempts to take control of his car.

there’s the boom of thunder and lightning and loud blares of horns before everything goes still, his body acting on auto pilot as he safely pulls off on the side of the highway.

his first concern isn’t damage to his car or the heightening storm outside - it’s you in his passenger seat, eyes closed tight and tears on your face. 

“are you okay?” yeonjun’s voice frantically asks, barely able to feel the sensation of his his warm hands on your face. your heart’s pounding and your hands are shaking and for a moment, you thought you were about to die. 

your eyes pop open to meet his and the concern in them only makes your eyes water more, bottom lip trembling as you nod your head. 

but even though you’re nodding he sees you’re not. he sees you trying to catch your breath and your eyes looking back and forth nervously outside.

“hey, hey, angel. it’s okay. i’m here,” he hums lowly, his thumbs running over your face soothingly. “i’m here and you’re okay.”

you attempt to catch and slow your breaths as your eyes never leave his, his only leaving you to quickly assess you for injuries.

“i know that was scary. i’m sorry. i should’ve been more careful.”

“it wasn’t your fault,” you squeak out, swallowing the knot in your throat as you shake your head. your eyes roam his and you pout when there’s guilt and sorrow in his eyes, your own hand snaking down to hold his hand. 

“are you okay?”

his eyes soften as he cups your face and brings you to closer to him, a quiet “yes, baby,” leaving his mouth before he places his lips on your forehead.

you breathe in his scent and he breathes in yours, not allowing himself to pull away until he feels you relax under him.

“i’m gonna drive us to my house, okay?” he says, his eyes back on you looking cautious. “we can order food. i just don’t want us driving in this if it’s gonna get worse.”

you nod your head before reaching down to grasp one of his hands tightly, his small smile meeting you before he carefully pulls back onto the highway. 

the storm gets substantially worse as he makes his way to his house, hand grasping yours tightly as he drives slow and steady. 

he’s flooded with relief when he finally pulls in his driveway, running around the passenger side door to help you out. his hand doesn’t leave the small of your back until you’re in his room, a big space with white walls and black furniture that doesn’t surprise you in the slightest.

contrary to most teenage boy’s rooms, his smells really good. like a mix of his cologne, laundry detergent and a distinct smell you’ve just deemed as his natural scent.

it’s comforting and makes you feel at ease, licking over your lips nervously as you realize this is the first time you’ve been in a boy’s room.

“you want anything to drink?”

“i...i’m good,” you say, sitting on his bed as you look around.

there’s no decor on the walls except for a large flat screen tv across from his bed and above his dresser, a pile of clothes off to the side. 

“sorry, i didn’t expect to have anyone over so it’s a little messy.”

you look over at him sitting beside you, a sheepish smile on his face. you think it’s the first time he’s ever sounded somewhat... nervous and out of his comfort zone. 

maybe because he knows you’ve never been in this situation before. 

“it’s okay, i like your room,” you smile, spreading your fingers out across his soft, dark comforter. “it’s very fitting.”

“oh yeah?” he smirks, inching closer to you and making your heart speed up. “and why’s that?”

there’s that dark playfulness you’re so used to seeing swarming behind his eyes, just as teasing as it is intense that makes you hold back a squeak. he quirks his eyebrow as he moves closer, pink tongue peeking out to roll over his lips.

you can’t help when your eyes fall to them, missing the feel of them on yours. 

you two haven’t gone past making out, a clash of tongues and teeth that have you quietly moaning into his mouth. but when your body acts on its own accord, pushing yourself closer to him or grasping at the bottom of his shirt, he always stops you.

“what are you doin’ baby?”

you were in his car after a tutoring session, the parking lot of the school completely deserted. your cheeks flush and you immediately draw your hands back, lowering your head slightly as embarrassment took over. 

“i...i thought that was...don’t you wanna...”

because clothes come off, that’s how it starts - you know that much.

and you can feel how much he wants to go further, the hardness under you that scared you at first now the thing begging you to go further.

you feel wanted and desired and even though you’re scared, you want to go further.

“we don’t have to do anything, baby. this is fine,” he says softly, his hand reaching up to cup your cheek. 

“but i want to,” you mumble, not even sure if he can hear your words because of how quiet you are. 

you know he must though because he draws his fingers under your chin to lift your face, eyes heavy of fondness and arousal making your stomach flutter more. 

your first instinct is to assume he doesn’t want you - why else would he stop you? but you can see in his eyes that he does...right? because it really does look like that.

what other reason would he have to stop you though? maybe he just doesn’t-

“whatever you’re thinking is probably wrong,” yeonjun mutters, tightening his hold on you and bringing you closer to him. “i don’t wanna go further with you while we’re in the car, angel. you deserve more than that.”

“hm?” you hear him hum, ripping you from your memories. 

you look from his lips to his eyes watching you with lust, the beginnings of your nonsense words cut off when he kisses you. 

your heart flutters and stomach swoops immediately, kissing back with an embarrassing amount of fervor. he smirks against your lips as he pulls you on his lap, your arms circling around his shoulders.

his tongue traces your bottom lip before you feel it in your mouth, daringly meeting his back in a way you’d never done before. it causes him to bring his hands to your hips, squeezing and massaging them with his large hands. 

“look at you,” he mutters almost condescendingly, falling back onto his bed and causing you to squeal. you’re holding yourself above him and his eyebrow is quirked, red lips puffy and pink hair messy causing your heart to flutter mercilessly.

“if i didn’t know any better, baby, i’d think you’re real eager tonight.”

you bite down on your lip as you adjust yourself on him, your hips straddling his and brushing over him. your building heat is right under him and it takes everything in you not to moan at just the thought, his hands strong and firm.

and just as you’re about to answer, tell him that, yes, even though you’re not familiar with.... any of this, you’re eager and ready, your stomach growls and ruins the moment.

it causes a smile to light up his face, a deep chuckle leaving him before he flips you over. he’s hovering above you now, no parts of your bodies touching except for his hand a few inches away from your head. 

“or you’re hunger, my mistake, angel,” he says with a smirk, pressing a peck to your nose sweetly. “what do you want?”

you spend the next hour laying in his bed waiting for the pizza, the storm just as wild outside as it was when you were in the car. you bit down on a squeal threatening to leave your mouth every time there was a terrifying boom, your body shimming closer to yeonjun’s.

he smiled against your head and welcomed your body closer, bringing your head to his chest.

“you’re cute,” you hear him mumble, the swooping in your stomach causing you to feel warm.

you look up at him and smile shyly, tucking your head closer into his chest. you have to hide your growing smile when you feel his lips brush your head, deep content hums leaving his chest.

the doorbell ringing rips you two apart, his mumbled “i’ll be right back,’ causing you to sit up. you brush your fingers through your hair as you sit up, looking around his dark room and feeling something brewing in your stomach.

you feel every bit as nervous as you do excited and eager in his room with him right now. 

it’s still scary because you’re new to this. because you’ve never done anything like this before and you know you don’t know what you’re doing. 

but a part of you wants to kiss him on his bed. go further than he’s allowed you to because if he only didn’t want to be with you in the car, this should solve that problem, right?

you’ve never felt as desired and warm as you have with him these past months. no one’s ever looked at you the way he does or have made you feel the way he does. 

you’re usually too scared or uneasy to talk to people or form a connection; but from the moment you met him, you were able to do that. a part of you just felt inclined to help him, be a person that he knows would be there for him even if it meant in the form of helping him study or motivate him.

you never would’ve expected for him to reciprocate your feelings. nor would you have expected to be in this current situation, want and need bubbling in your stomach at the thought of yeonjun doing-

“pizza’s here,” yeonjun says, popping his head through the door holding a box of pizza. 

you smile upon seeing it, your stomach growling at the smell; if he hears it, he doesn’t say anything. just walks over and places the box on his bed, offering you a slice that you take immediately.

“thank you,” you squeak, bringing the food to your mouth.

he watches you for a few seconds, suddenly all too aware of him looking at you. you raise an eyebrow as you chew, a shy look coming over your face that causes him to smile. 

“what?”

“nothing,” he says, shaking his head as he takes out his own slice. “my mom called me and said they can’t come home tonight because of the storm.”

you take the time to chew your food as you take in his words, the fluttering in your stomach a mix of nerves and excitement. 

“oh.”

“yeah...” he hums, his eyes roaming your face; he doesn’t want his next suggestion to make you uncomfortable but he also thinks it would be best. for both of you. 

“and i don’t know if i should drive you home, angel. it’s supposed to get really bad. do you... wanna stay over?”

there’s a lump in your throat for all the reasons there shouldn’t be. 

not because this is your first time sleeping over a boy’s house or the fact that his parents aren’t home. or because you’re gonna have to call your mom and say you’re sleeping over a friend’s house.

or even because you don’t know what to expect tonight.

it’s only there because you know, in a new form of acting on your deeper desires and not suppressing yourself to just being some innocent girl, you wanna get railed.

“i... i guess i can do that,” you say, some nervousness still behind your voice because when it comes down to it, you’re unfamiliar with this situation. 

“well yeah, but do you want to, baby?” he asks with a small smirk, his hand reaching up to toy with your hair. 

his long fingers run through the strands before tucking them behind your ear, his hand slinking down to rest on your neck.

“if you don’t feel comfortable, i’ll take you home later,” he says, thumb running across your skin slowly. breath catches in your throat when he leans closer to you, his lingering scent and broadness causing you to bite down on your lip.

“i just thought it’d be nice to lay with you tonight. or wake up with you.”

“or let us go further since we’re not in the car.” 

you don’t know who’s more shocked by your words but you know you’re definitely more embarrassed, a rampant blush crossing your cheeks as you attempt to hide in his shoulder.

he’s quick to pull you away with a small “tsk,” the smirk on his lips quickly widening despite the soft look in his eyes. 

you bite back the noise threatening to leave your mouth when he wraps his hand around you hair, the slightest of stings ripping through your scalp when he pulls you forward.

“go further?” he asks lowly, his eyes peering down at you only making you feel more warm and flustered. 

words are caught in your mouth and you can’t find it in you to say anything. not only because you’re too embarrassed but you don’t even know what to say.

you know you want more than kissing and that there’s always a building pressure between your legs when he pulls you on his lap. 

you know on more than one occasion, you’ve wanted his hands that’d rest on your hips to go just a little further down. slip in the waistband of your pants and meet the wetness and heat through your underwear.

you’ve wanted to see his pink hair between your legs as you experience getting eaten out of the first time, holding back moans in the crease of your elbow as his tongue explores every inch of you. 

you know you want to look up at him with tears in your eyes and a heaving chest, ask if you can please suck him off because you’ve also never done that before. 

he can see the arousal and lust clouding your eyes the more the silence elapses, his cock quickly hardening as he takes in the sight of you on his bed ready for him to take you. 

it’s just a matter of how and when he’s gonna. how and when you tell him like the good girl he knows you are. 

“how much further are you thinking, angel?” his deep voice finally asks, successfully breaking the silence and building the thick tension. 

you let out a breathy exhale when he pushes you on your back, the knot in your stomach tightening as he looks down at your body. 

“what do you want me to do, huh?” he asks, the smirk and feeling in his chest growing when he sees you start to breathe heavily on his bed. your legs are nearly shaking from the build up in pressure, your tongue licking over your dry lips. 

“i... yeonjun...”

he bites back the groan threatening to leave his mouth at you moaning his name, holding himself above your body as he hand spays out against your stomach. 

“why are you moaning my name baby? i haven’t even done anything.”

“but... but i want you to. so bad.”

your voice is whiny and pathetic but it’s all it takes for him to snap, his hand moving from your stomach to between your legs. 

he can feel the heat and pulse of your pussy and has to suppress his own groan again, completely getting off on the feeling that you, the innocent little tutor he’s been wanting to ruin since he saw you last year, is laid out on his bed and dripping just for him. 

“please, yeonjun,” you whine again, completely out of your mind with lust when you feel his hand on you. 

he bites down on his lip before he starts gently running his hand over you, barely putting any pressure on you. he’s just relishing in the how only that makes you spread your legs immediately, hips bucking up closer to his hand. 

he pulls his hand away and pins your hips to the bed, his face hovering above yours before you can even whine again. 

“be patient, angel. or this isn’t gonna work,” he growls lowly, his thumbs running over your pants gently. 

“i- i’m sorry,” you gasp out, tears pricking your eyes because this feeling is so new and foreign and overwhelming. “i just... i’m so...”

“you’re so what?”

“i want you,” you say immediately, thinking back to your conversation with him outside of soobin’s house. when the words you’re telling him now are the same ones he told you. “i want you more than you know.”

a scoff leaves his mouth when you say that, remembering those words leaving his own mouth that night.

but the difference here is, he thinks, is that you really didn’t know that.

you didn’t know how just sitting there and smiling at him and talking to him so sweetly was making him want you. your soft smiles and vanilla scent and the wide-eyed look you’d always innocently give him.

but he’s aware of how much you want him, in this moment. he can feel it, smell it, see it. he knows just how much you want him because he wants you the same way. 

your pants and underwear are off in one shot, a gasp leaving your mouth when you realize you’re completely bare in front of him. 

he’s quick to look at your face to see if you’re okay, that teary wide-eyed look and teeth sinking in your lip greeting him; another whiney and mumbled “touch me,” leaves your mouth before he can ask.

a smile lights up his face that makes your heart jump even through this all, a teasing look in his eye even through the arousal and painful hardness in his pants.

“say please, angel.”

“please touch me, yeonjun. please.”

his fingers are on your clit right after the words leave you, your mouth hanging open and legs spreading when you’re immediately filed with a sense of some relief. 

“you’re so wet for me, angel. how long have you wanted this, huh?”

you babble out something you can’t even hear through your pounding ears but it must be something good and polite enough because you feel a finger enter you a few seconds later.

he hisses at the tightness around his finger and has to remember to be gentle with you, fingering you slowly and sweetly as he toys at your clit. 

“you’re doing so good, baby. so good for me.”

you cry out a moan that has his fingers moving quicker, curling them just right before you scream out his name; you’ve never ever felt anything like this before.

“yeonjun, oh, my god.”

“i know, baby, it’s okay,” he says, allowing his fingers to work over you and in you for a few seconds before he forces himself to remove them. your head shoots up and the sight almost makes him smile, a frustrated look in your teary eyes that has him cocking his head.

“why did you-”

the fingers just inside you are below your chin, the slickness of his fingers on your skin making you widen your eyes. is that... is he about to make you...

you hold back another moan when you watch him raise his fingers to his own mouth, his eyes rolling back when he tastes you. you don’t know if you’re a little grossed out or even more turned on but you think it must be the latter if the way your legs start to shake again and your lower stomach tightens. 

“you taste so fucking sweet, angel. can i eat your pussy?”

he could tell how scared you were when you first got here, not seeing a hint of that fear now but still needing to check before he pulls you on his face and has his way with you.

“y-yes, please, yeonjun, oh my-”

you can’t even get the words out before his hands are taking off your shirt, removing the straps of your bra and pushing them down until your boobs pop out. 

perky nipples spring into the air and he can’t stop the groan that leaves him, circling his tongue around each of them before he tells you to unhook it. your eyes meet his for just a few seconds before you reach out to take it off, quickly throwing it on the floor before you, without thinking, cover yourself. 

his eyes flash and he immediately snaps out of his trance, placing his hands on your arms but not attempting to move them. 

“what are you doing, angel?”

and it’s at this moment, something as silly as him seeing your chest completely naked, that you’re feeling insecure. 

you know he’s been with girls before this, college girls who definitely have bigger boobs than you and know what they’re doing. girls who are prettier and sexier and don’t blush or whine at the slightest hint of his touch of them. 

“i... i know you’ve been with prettier girls before. an-and i don’t think they’re that nice.”

“angel, i don’t know if i’ve gotten this across enough but you’re the most beautiful girl i’ve ever met,” he says, the sweetest words to ever leave his mouth not even making him blink.

because he needs you to know in this moment that you are. he can’t stand the insecure, fearful look in your eye that he’s not gonna find you desirable because you’re comparing yourself to other people. 

“that’s a lie,” you weakly mumble out, tears stinging your eyes because this is so stupid. now you’re ruining the moment and he’s not gonna wanna do this with you. you’re proving just how inexperienced and unfamiliar you are with-

“i don’t lie.”

your eyebrow raises and he can’t help but smirk, the realization that your whole relationship started off lying to your teacher making him let out a deep chuckle. 

“i mean i don’t lie to you, angel, i would never lie to you,” he says, reaching down to press a long kiss on your lips. it’s the most intimate kiss you’ve ever had with him, mouths parting on one another like you’re trying to get all your worries and reassurances out on one another.

him that you’re just as desirable as he knows you are and you that you really don’t know what you’re doing but you wanna do this with him. 

“you’re beautiful, baby, and if anyone’s not worthy of the other, it’s me.”

his words make your eyebrows pull together, the look in his eye one you’ve never seen before. probably the most vulnerable and honest you’ve seen him look at you. 

“but i’m gonna do my best to be, angel, so please... don’t think that,” he says, pulling your arms away from your chest. 

he feels relief flood through him when you allow him to do say, his head dipping again to place small pecks on your chest before taking another nipple in his mouth. 

he moans around you at the same time you do, throwing your head back against his pillow. your fingers lace through the back of his pink hair and you feel your pussy clenching around nothing, moaning out his name when his tongue carefully and slowly licks around the other neglected one. 

“you also have the sweetest pussy i’ve ever tasted,” he mumbles around your nipple, swirling his tongue around it one more time before grabbing your hips and throwing himself on his back. 

“so sit on my face, angel. now.”

you have no time to feel hesitant or insecure because, one, he pulls you up before you can do anything else and two, you’re far too eager to feel this for the first time. 

his tongue latching onto your clit causes you to moan out his name, trying your best to not buck your hips against his face. but his tongue feels like it’s everywhere, flicking at it your clit and up inside you and quickly making your legs shake around him. 

your hazy eyes look down and you see his own looking up at you, a hot arousal in them as you cover the rest of his face with your body. pink strands stick to his forehead and you bite down on your lip so you don’t scream, your eyes rolling back when he eats you out like a man starved.

he’s moaning against you and pulling you closer to his face, your hips bucking into his mouth as you whine out his name over and over. 

you’re so out of it and dazed with arousal and need that you don’t even think twice when an idea pops into your head. 

you buck your hips a tad harder than usual that he disconnects his mouth from you, about to ask if he hurt you somehow before you flip over on his face. your body leans over his stomach until your mouth is by the tight groin of his sweatpants, clumsily slipping down his boxers until his cock springs free.

it’s hard and red and looks completely neglected, screaming to be relieved by you.

so even though you have no idea what you’re doing, only guided by works of fiction and things you hear in the hallway, you wrap your mouth around the head of his cock.

you hear him growl at your name but only continue to suck him off, your tongue circling around him as your mouth moves up and down. you smile when he moans against your pussy just so moan around his a few seconds later, like he knew you were smiling against him at hearing that noise leave him.

he didn’t think he could get any harder than he already was but you continue to impress him and prove him wrong, his mouth working quicker on you to aid in his growing arousal. 

a loud moan of your name leaves his mouth when you deep throat him, a growled “fuck,” against your wetness that makes you whine against him. 

“i wanna fuck your mouth so badly,” he growls against you, wrapping his tongue around your clit just as you let out a strangled “please.” but he only shakes his head and continues his vigorous assault, sticking two fingers inside you that causes your scream to be muffled around his cock.

“you’re gonna come first, angel. i want you to come on my fucking face.”

and even though he already seemed to know it from the moment he met you, he sees that what he wants from you, he’s always gonna get. 

your lower stomach tightens before a feeling of euphoria consumes you, your legs shaking and hips bucking before an orgasm rips right through you. your head is leant against his head as you try to catch your breath, whining slightly when he pulls you off of him.

he lays you down gently on the bed before placing a kiss to your cheek. 

“you did so good, angel. how do you feel?”

“mmm.. that was the best thing i’ve ever felt.”

a deep laugh leaves him at your sleepy, dazed look, taking his shirt off so he can dab at your wet legs. you wince a little at the sensitivity and he mumbles an apology, laying on his back and opening his arms to you.

“lay with me, baby.”

a small smile crosses your face as you fall into his bare chest, sighing contently with your head resting over his chest. you can hear his heartbeat against your ear and feel his lips against your head, his fingers running over your arm slowly.

you’ve never been more comfortable and at ease than you are in this moment. even with the storm raging outside and the unknown parts of your relationship still coming, you feel happy. 

happy and safe and so stupidly content.  

“angel?”

you look up at him when you hear his voice break the silence, your chin against his chest as you meet his gaze. 

he smiles upon seeing you, his hand coming up to pat down your messy hair. 

“i like you. a lot.”

you bite down on your lip to hide your growing smile, daringly taking the first move to press a sweet peck on his lips.

“i like you, too. a lot, a lot,” you giggle out, the pink on your cheeks making his heart squeeze in his chest. “but i think you already knew that.”

“i was hoping,” he hums lowly, bringing you back into his chest. you smile against him as you inhale his scent, moving your body closer to him until you feel your leg hit a hard, fleshy piece of skin. 

your eyes widen and pulse quickens when you see he’s still hard and aching, the content look on his face completely disregarding it. 

“yeonjun...” you mumble, shamelessly staring at his dick a few inches from your leg. 

he peeks an eye open and sees you staring down at it, a sheepish smile crossing his face; he looks a tad embarrassed and you shouldn’t find it as endearing as you do. 

“sorry. it’ll go down eventually.”

eventually being when he gets up to go to the bathroom and jerks himself off. because there’s no way in hell he’s gonna go flaccid with you all naked and cuddled against him.

“you mean you’re not gonna fuck me?”

his eyes widen and cock twitches when those words leave your mouth, his hand falling to your jaw so you can look at him. his eyes roam your face when he sees the heavy desire building in your wide-eyed gaze, the perfect contrast of sweet and lustful that has him holding back a groan. 

“where did you learn to talk like this?” he hums lowly in your ear. 

you smirk against him before you bring your hand up to his mouth, his eyes searching yours. but you’re only staring back just as intensely, rubbing yourself against his leaking cock laying between you. 

“spit on it, please.”

he can’t even stop his groan from leaving him this time, painfully hard and ready to bust. you learned so fast what he likes and that’s when you’re both polite and eager.

“baby girl,” he moans, bringing his face down to place a messy, dominating kiss on yours. he pulls your mouths apart after allowing his tongue to explore your mouth, a string of spit connecting your lips. 

his eyes fall to your mouth before he’s tipping your head back, your hand clutching onto his shoulder and tightening when, suddenly, he spits in your mouth. 

your eyes widen but he smirks before you can say anything, wordlessly bringing your hand to his mouth and spitting on it as you so requested. you let out a shaky sigh, eyeing him warily before he gives you a nod.

it’s only then that you wrap your hand around his cock, watching as his eyes flutter shut and he leans his head back. 

“there u go, angel,” he hums lowly, your hand twisting over the tip before exploring down. 

he can feel your hesitance and unsureness but it only makes it that much more enjoyable for him, knowing this is the first time you’ve done this - although he does wonder how you knew to spit on it first. 

his words spur you on and you wet your hand again, twisting and turning on every ridge of his cock. his moans of your name cause wetness to gather between your legs, your eyes meeting his to see them right on you.

“please fuck me, yeonjun.”

you didn’t have to ask him twice before he pushed you on your back. he fumbled to take his sweatpants off fully, discarding them on the floor before pulling you toward the end of bed.

you look down at him with furrowed eyebrows before a loud gasp leaves you, his mouth back on your pussy before he slides two fingers in. he preps you again until you’re coming around him, his mouth hot around you while his fingers are curled and relentless.

“p-please, yeonjun. i wanna- feel you.”

“and you will, angel, i promise,” he says, pressing one last kiss to your swollen, wet clit before going up to your face. “you’ve never done this before, right?”

he knows it and you know it but he still needs to ask. needs to know he’s gonna be the first person to take you and ruin you. 

“no,” you immediately respond, shaking your head as tears well up in your eyes. 

he responds by smiling, placing one last long kiss on your mouth before cupping your face gently.

“it might hurt, okay? i’ll go as slow as you need.”

you nod your head as you relax on your back, looking down to see him positioning himself between your legs. he swirls the tip of his dick around your wet clit and opening, watching as your dripping hole tries to suck him in.

“holy fuck,” he growls out, “you’re so wet, baby. it’s gonna feel so fucking good.”

you whine unintelligible words but he knows to just soothe you. bring his hand to your waist and rub slowly as he promises to be in you soon.

the stretch at first in painful and unfamiliar, your face pulled into a grimace despite the deep groan leaving him.

“oh, angel,” he growls lowly, his dark eyes meeting yours to see your face twisted in pain. “are you okay? does it hurt?”

“y-yes, but it’s okay. just... slow,” you say quietly, nodding your head reassuringly. 

he hovers over your face as he inches himself in further and further, your breaths shaky and body tense as the pain worsens. 

“i’m sorry, baby, you’re doing so good.”

you nod your head and he kisses away the tears, a sigh of relief leaving you when he stops moving. he’s still inside you for a few seconds, allowing your tight walls to adjust around him before he starts moving.

it takes a few thrusts for the burning pain to subside, replaced by a full, warm feeling that had you moaning quietly into the air. 

“does it feel good now, baby?” you hear yeonjun ask, his thrusts speeding up as his body lays over you. “do you like my cock in you?”

“y-yes,” you mumble out, throwing your legs around his waist. 

he growls lowly as he starts fucking into you, keeping his pace steady and just hard enough to make you lose your mind; because he doesn’t wanna hurt you but you also feel so good, he can’t help but chase after his orgasm.

“tell me you’re mine.”

“i-i’m yours, yeonjun,” you whimper out, his hand coming down to your clit making you cry out again. “i’m yours. yours, yours, yours,” you repeat dumbly, having no sense of control over yourself as an immense pleasure builds inside you. 

he thrusts into you hitting a certain spot that has a scream leaving your mouth, a sadistic smirk on his face.

“that’s right, angel. you’re mine. you’ve been mine ever since i saw you last year,” he growls lowly, remembering the first time he saw you and knew you were gonna somehow effect him like this. 

“i wanted to ruin you then, baby, because i knew you’d be mine.”

“yeonjun,” you whine, thrusting your hips into him at his words. remembering all the times he caught you staring at him. all the times you’d watch him and thought about how handsome he was.

how someone like him would never want someone like you. 

but he wants you and you want him and it’s still something you can’t quite believe. you know you’re both different but it seems to be something that works, him bringing you out of your comfort zone and you making him wanna be someone better.

“i’m gonna come, angel,” he grunts out, “i’m gonna fucking come. come with me.”

you feel the knot in your stomach unravel before you’re both moaning each other’s names, chests heaving and his breathing harsh as he holds himself lazily above you. 

he drops his head into the crook of your neck, attempting to catch his breath despite the feeling of your post orgasm spazzing around him.

the pounding takes a few seconds to subside, a final moan leaving him before he pulls out of you. 

he’s quick to collapse onto his back, hanging his arm off the bed lazily as he searches for his shirt. 

he cleans you up a few moments later, watching you with a small smile before he pulls you down onto him again.

“how was that?” he mumbles quietly, his eyes closed and head resting atop yours. 

“really good,” you mumble back, your own eyes closed as you attempt to catch your breath. you still feel a little sticky but it’s not something you mind in this moment, your post orgasm daze leaving you content. 

it could be the post orgasm daze making you say the next words that leave your mouth. on such a high of emotions and endorphins and utter contentment that the warm feeling in your chest if confused.

or maybe it’s the months of getting to know the boy beside you who had such a bad reputation. who you were terrified of at first and thought was mean an scary, thought for sure he was gonna find you weird and nerdy.

but you’ve never felt more wanted or desired by another person. no one’s ever looked at you the way he’s looked at you before or made you feel the way he’s made you feel. 

“i... i think i love you, yeonjun.”

love had always scared yeonjun and especially hearing a confession like that after sex - it had always been his worst nightmare and, truthfully, an embarrassing moment.

but he’s never felt as listened to and comforted by someone else ever in his life before. someone who, from the second he met them, trusted him and thought of him to be good and smart and capable. 

he didn’t know why and he didn’t know what he did for you to think of him that way but he knows he’s never gonna take it for granted. because from the second he saw you, he really did know you were gonna be his.

“i think i might love you, too, angel.”

[nixie-writes]

Hey I was curious if you could do an Angel x touch starved reader? Basically the reader is extremely depressed and lonely, so they pay a lot of money to hire Angel to simply cuddle for the night and feel ashamed because they feel so desperate for affection and feel like they're no different than any other client that would only see Angel as an object. I am female but it can be gender neutral for everyone if you wanted.❤

OKAY I loved this idea so much I dropped everything to do it right now. This idea is super sweet, I stan Angel when he isn't being whored out by the pimp I'd willingly make my bitch. And thank you so much for being my first unique request I'm so happy <3 I will add now - pronouns are female but there isn't any mention of a body type, so it can be taken as male or gender neutral. TW - mentions of prostitution, explicit depiction of death, mention of cannibalism, mentions of sex, reader has a lot of recent trauma, hurt to comfort, explicit depiction of a panic attack/reaction to grief and guilt This wasn't intended to be such an angsty thing, nor did I expect it to be four pages long according to Google Docs but I sorta let the story carry me and I let it happen. It'll be under the cut because of the trigger warnings mentioned above.

[Y/N]: How much money for one night? Pimp: depends, what u want? [Y/N]: I don’t know yet, I’d just like some time with him.  Pimp: $450 up front extra fee if u rough him up  [Y/N]: That’s fine. Venmo or Cashapp? Pimp: meet me behind my studio and we’ll do our exchange in person. [Y/N]: I’d rather not be seen paying for a prostitute. Pimp: this is hell no one gives a fuck those are my terms [Y/N]: Fine, I'll be there in 30.

Well, fuck. Valentino wants 450 fucking dollars up front to pass Angel Dust, acclaimed porn star and prostitute, to [Y/N] for the night. How she’d saved up this money she was unsure, she just accumulated it over time. It apparently does pay off to save up. Get a low-wage part-time job at a shitty fast food restaurant and endure the bullshit of customers long enough and one could save up a few hundred. Not that anyone else knew she had this kind of money, much less where it was going. 

[Y/N] threw on some loose clothes - baggy gray hoodie with a shitty band t-shirt underneath and matching gray sweatpants. No one could recognize her looking like this. This was fucking embarrassing. Paying a prostitute for hugs and positive affirmation? Whatever God was up there had a cruel sense of humor. [Y/N] was stooping low. After the previous extermination a few months ago nothing had truly been the same. Not like she was happy before then but now, it was only worse. First was the loss of [Y/N]’s only friend, Cleo. During the extermination Cleo was on the phone with [Y/N], their breathing labored as they ran, searching for any nook or cranny to hide in while the exterminators roamed the city. [Y/N] tried her damn best to give Cleo directions to her house but in the midst of Cleo’s panic they got lost and were cornered. Their phone clattered to the concrete ground beneath them, followed by cries of pain and a sickening squelching sound. Cleo managed to grab their phone one last time in an attempt to tell [Y/N] something but their mouth was full of blood and their voice was weak; first was a struggle to make real words, followed by a strangled gurgling and finally an eerie silence. The extermination was over…And so was Cleo. In the following days [Y/N] had located her friend’s corpse; many disgusting things had been done to the lifeless body but Cleo still deserved a rightful funeral and with the help of a certain cannibal, their body was fed to those who needed the food. A request Cleo had made to [Y/N] long ago if they happened to die before she did. All [Y/N] had left of her missing friend was their cell phone. At first [Y/N] considered getting the screen repaired but, the touch screen still worked, there was no inner damage and [Y/N] knew the passcode so she could still view Cleo’s camera gallery. The two took so many photos together, so many dumb drunken selfies and so many pictures of Cleo after a makeover or after getting their nails done. So many pictures of Cleo that once held so much happiness, now only held an empty memory. [Y/N] shut the phone off for the last time and put it away in a drawer and it hasn’t been touched since. 

After Cleo’s passing [Y/N] lost her previous job at some bar as a waitress. It was no special job and for the most part she lived off tips but what upset her was the number of years she’d given to her employer, only to be dropped once another prettier woman applied for [Y/N]’s job as the sole waitress. In a desperate attempt to pay the rent without whoring herself out she took up her current job. Yes it was shit and the customers were perverted assholes but it paid the bills and kept her fed without stooping to cannibalism. 

Even with a job to cover the bills [Y/N] was only getting worse. Her roommate ditched after [Y/N] refused to cover his bills or fuck him for the money to pay it all off. She was truly alone now. She’d given everyone so much more than she gave them and now it was all for naught. 

Shaking her head to clear the thoughts and memories [Y/N] climbed into her car - she certainly didn’t pay for it but there was no license plate so no one was going to find their stolen car. Wasn’t her fault someone left the keys in the ignition while they went into some gas station. After a few sputters the engine started up, growling like an old dog with a sore throat. Valentino’s studio was about a 10 minute drive so she’d arrive early but perhaps that’s what Valentino would prefer. Whatever was necessary to get what she was paying for. Rounding a few corners and following a straight road [Y/N] pulled up to the studio, covered in flashing lights with an occasional prostitute hanging around the outside of the building. Didn’t matter if they belonged to Valentino or not, it wasn't her business. Stopping her car at the side of the building [Y/N] slid out and walked, as casually as she could, to the sharp corner where whispering was audible. A little cautious [Y/N] halted for a moment to listen. “Val. You know I’m gay I don’t fuck girls. I don’t want to-” Angel Dust’s voice was cut short and replied to by a harsh, throaty growl. “I don’t give a rat’s ass Angel. Who cares what’s between her legs, she’s paying up front so show her a good time.” [Y/N] had heard enough. Pulling the rolled up dollar bills from her bra she stepped around the corner, making herself known to the two. Valentino held Angel Dust by the jaw but upon noticing his client dropped Angel back down to his feet. He looked unsure of himself and [Y/N] felt the same. Approaching Valentino she passed him the bills; he fingered the paper for a moment and pocketed it, nudging Angel Dust closer to [Y/N]. “Say hi to your new friend!” Valentino chirped, an oddly wicked grin on his face. Did he…Enjoy selling out Angel Dust? Turning around with a casual wave he called out with a cackle, “have fun kids!” 

[Y/N] moved to the side, guiding Angel Dust back to her car. The ride back to her place was uncomfortably quiet. She felt his eyes on her the entire ride, from the corner of her vision she saw his frown and furrowed eyebrows. He wasn’t any more fond of the previous exchange than she was. It was an uneventful ride back home and [Y/N] led Angel Dust into her home, pointing out some things he may need. 

“Restroom is down the hall, kitchen is to your left and you can sleep on the-” Angel Dust cut her off with a harsh snort. “Get to the point bitch, what you want me to do? Eat you out, fuck you, finger you, what do you want?” Angel Dust’s harsh voice took [Y/N] by surprise. There was an almost hateful glare in his eyes. He really didn’t want to be here. She felt her lower lip pout as she glanced away from him in shame. “That’s, um, not why I wanted you.” She replied in a meek tone. Angel Dust grimaced. “Then what do you want? To record me jack off? You want the boyfriend experience?” Angel quipped. “You just wanna feel special? You that lonely? Pathetic little bi-” “shut the fuck up.” [Y/N] interrupted, meeting his gaze again. Her teeth were gritting, tears threatened to spill from her eyes. Angel Dust hit too many nerves and it was beginning to bubble over. “You fucking asshole I just wanted a friend fo the night. You don’t know me, I don’t know you. I just needed some emotional support but I’m clearly not going to get that from you. So go back to Valentino and tell him to keep the money.” [Y/N] snarled, shoving Angel Dust away as she spoke. Her voice was cracking, hot tears streaked her face, she could feel her broken expression, she just didn’t care in that moment. What the fuck was she thinking, asking some prostitute to be her friend for a night? Whipping around [Y/N] turned to stalk and made a few steps to her room before a hand grasped her shoulder, holding her in that spot. Turning back to who she already knew was holding her in place she gave him the cruelest expression she could manage but with the tears still pouring and unsteady breathing she certainly couldn’t be intimidating. 

Angel Dust’s expression was…Different. His eyes thinly veiled suspicion but his antagonizing grin was gone, replaced with a sympathetic frown. “Then tell me, what did you want?” He prompted softly. Wordlessly [Y/N] walked over to the dresser not far from her and pulled out that shattered phone, praying it would start up. After a few moments the booting screen lit up, followed by the lock screen she passed through. Turning back to Angel Dust she opened the camera gallery and presented Angel Dust with the most recent photo Cleo and [Y/N] took together, two days prior to the extermination. She couldn’t bear to look at it, but perhaps Angel Dust would understand. Gently taking the phone from [Y/N] he gazed at the photo for a moment and glanced back up. “Was this your friend?” He inquired, [Y/N] nodded her head, trying to hide how her lips pursed with a new flood of emotions she’d buried. “I lost Cleo in the extermination. I miss her so much. My roommate left when I refused to pay his bills or fuck him to make him pay his half, my job is a shitshow and I just needed some company for a night.” [Y/N] found herself spilling everything to Angel Dust. She knew this wasn’t a very good idea but she couldn’t hold in the flood of words any longer. “It’s been so hard and lonely, no one understands and no one reaches out to me anymore. I have no one.” [Y/N]’s voice stopped suddenly as her throat closed on her and another sob choked out of her. She had so much more to say but her crying had become uncontrollable; she was heaving for air, her lungs burned, her stomach was tight and her knees were weak. She didn’t have the strength to hold in her crying anymore. Her voice grew in volume and within 30 seconds she was screaming out. A painful mix of grief, anger, betrayal and pure hatred. She hardly noticed four pairs of arms pulling her into a hug, her face buried in a soft, warm and fuzzy cocoon of fluff. Instinctively she wrapped her arms around the slim figure holding her, grasping the suit in her hands and shoving her face into the bony interior of Angel Dust’s chest. Her cries evolved to screams; she didn’t know how else to get the pain out. She choked out a string of curses between her screams and cries, shrieking out for Cleo, begging her late friend to hear her repeated sobs of apology. Why hadn’t she done more? Got in her car and drove out to get Cleo? 

A gloved hand gently stroked [Y/N]’s head, Angel Dust’s voice soft as he hummed soft little things to her, the occasional “it’s not your fault” and “Cleo forgives you” whispered between other phrases. It took a few minutes of Angel Dust’s comfort but slowly [Y/N] regained control of her breathing, the crying and screaming stopped, she could stand on her own again. She didn’t want to pull away. Gazing up to Angel Dust, who returned her with a look of concern, she whispered a soft ‘thank you’, hugging him tight before pulling away. 

With a sigh [Y/N] resumed her speech from earlier. “Things have been…Hard. You know my story as of late. I would just like your company, if it’s okay.” She offered him a smile, silently begging him to accept. He appeared thoughtful for a moment before nodding his agreement. “Alright, sounds fine I guess. What we doing?” He prompted as he strode to the kitchen to find a snack. With a quiet breath of relief [Y/N] replied, “I have some Disney movies, and if it’s okay I’d like to talk more about Cleo. I don’t want her to be forgotten.” Exiting the kitchen with a few soda cans and a bag of chips Angel Dust smiled back. “Sounds fine, lead the way. What we gonna watch first?” [YN] shrugged; “Cinderella sound good?” She prompted. Angel snorted and quipped back, “ain’t that a little cheesy?” Giggling for the first time in what felt like an eternity she responded, “the cheesy chips in your arms don’t defend you much.” Angel Dust puffed humorously. “True, true. Let’s get to the movie.” He agreed as he moved to the couch in the small living room, setting down his snacks and getting comfortable. 

“Thank you, Angel Dust.” [Y/N] spoke softly as she grabbed the DVD and started up the player. A soft hum was heard, followed by Angel Dust replying, “no probs gal. And call me Angel.” --- A/N: I'm not entirely impressed with this one, but I feel like if I rewrote it or changed important aspects of it, it wouldn't hold the same gravity it did when I was writing it. Again, I let the story carry me and I was just along for the ride. I hope this one was good!