#﹠﹔ in character. interaction. frieda.

[flmed]

the forgotten, almost childish beam is hidden underneath the calloused palm, however she still could see the rose tinted cheeks that are emerging bashfully upon the compliment––––––it has been few moons, or years perhaps, that he let himself to relishing a momentary indulgence for surviving the desolation of mankind . . . liquors are merely catalyst tools for effervescent happiness but the ingenuity of happiness always come from loving interaction 'twined with amorous flirtation, whether it is deliberate or not, but it is a reminder that he is not a shell oin the trench, but a person on the ground, coiling to the sense of reality; of how it used to be, but could never return to how it used to be .. remnants of what's left, or perhaps something to reclaim once again,

@s4ints, frieda said, "i've never heard your laugh before. i love it."

‘ you should have met me before the war––––––i was much tolerable &. handsome, obviously, ’ wiggling his eyebrows as he raises his glass to his lips &. sipping an equal amount of audacity to return the same woo she has spoken to his ear .. cheeky simper, vehemently shaking his head disapprovingly within self because he let himself to be swindled by a jest &. compliment . . . but it felt good, it feels good, that he could be the ghost of how he used to be, or the person that was waiting within the dirt with their burnt hand above the ground; dangling &. expecting someone would pull him from the everlasting dread of being dead, &. taken to be alive .. perhaps she has made him feel alive, even if it feels iniquitous because she may have wanted her husband laughing alongside with her .. but it's the laugh she recognised, &. loved it that doesn't come from her husband, but the husband's comrade before he got burnt alive, ‘ but i guess, i still have it in me .. that a little boy. he still lives, apparently. ’

&. PLAYFUL AFFECTION

[the-outcast-conman]

Introduction, or Something

Technology is crazy these days, all these kids and their phones--

Anyways! I'm Stan Pines, former owner and head of the Mystery Shack in Gravity Falls, Oregon, which I'm pretty sure might not exist here but I gotta say it so you know I'm qualified.

No clue how I got here, or how I'm alive after all of that chaos, but I'm here now and that's about to be everyone's problem!

(Also, big thanks to @phantomjokerofhearts for helping me set this up. That kid's a smart one.)

Update, I should probably list my . . . Pokemon guys, or something?

Dolly the "Flamigo", she's literally a flamingo and I love her

Roscoe the . . . "Mimikyu" I guess? He's dressed like some kind of a crow in a witch's hat

And Frieda the cat. She hatched from an egg, I'm still confused at how a cat came from an egg, also she's apparently a "Meowth"

Out of Character:

Hello again! It's Lily! AGAIN. Welcome to the blog for DF!Stan Pines.

Divided Falls is a collaborative Gravity Falls AU/RP by me and several of my friends, taking place in rotomblr because reasons. Other blogs in this AU so far are @s1llystraws (Bill Cipher), @broken-pine-tree (Dipper), @fallen-shooting-star (Mabel), @a-lost-author (Ford), and @violet-ashes (Scalene and Euclid).

My main is @boom-fanfic-a-latta, follows and likes will be from there.

Please keep things SFW--while I'm not a minor, I'm still very averse to anything NSFW, and there ARE minor who interact with this blog.

Pelipper Mail and Mystery Gifts are ON!

[transdimensional-void]

Japanese Language and World-building in Ascendance of a Bookworm

I decided to make this post because a conversation with @mesaprotector made me realize that readers experiencing Ascendance of a Bookworm in English (through Quof’s admittedly excellent translations) might not be aware of Kazuki-sensei’s extensive use of Japanese linguistic features in shaping the world and its characters.

Disclaimer: I don’t have any particular credentials that make me an expert in this area. All I can boast is good enough Japanese language skills to notice these features! But, if you’re interested in my explanation, read on...

About Japanese

Japanese is a language that allows people to easily express their relationship to others through their choice of words. This is likely rooted in Japan’s feudal past, when social roles were much more strictly defined and enforced. Some features that allow this are:

Masculine vs. Feminine Speech: Men and women can (and often still do) use completely different vocabulary as a form of gender expression.

Use of Different Titles: Most manga and anime fans are familiar with titles like -san and -sama used to refer to others politely. Not using a title for someone is also a way to express your perceived relationship to them.

Polite vs. Informal Speech: You use polite speech when speaking to people you perceive as being of a higher social ranking than you, or people you are not close enough to use informal speech with. There are varying levels of politeness. For example, “aru” is casual, “arimasu” is polite, and “gozaimasu” is ultra-super-polite.

Pronouns in Ascendance of a Bookworm

I (first person singular pronoun)

Commoner women, like Tuuli and Effa, use わたし(watashi, written in hiragana) to say I. Commoner men, like Gunther, use オレ(ore, written in katakana) to say I.

Noble women, like Florencia and Elvira, use わたくし(watakushi, written in hiragana) to say I. Noble men, like Damuel and Sylvester, use 私 (watashi, written in kanji) to say I.

There are some commoner women who exclusively use “watakushi,” like noble women do. Frieda does, and so do all of the gray shrine maidens in the temple. Similarly, the gray priests in the temple use “watashi” instead of “ore.”

Well-trained commoner men who are interacting with nobles (e.g. - Benno when he gets fancified) will switch to “watashi” as well.

Even after becoming a noble and referring to herself as “watakushi” when speaking, Myne still calls herself “watashi” in her inner monologue. This is not the case for other women who have been trained to use “watakushi” since birth, so it’s a sign that Myne's inner self is unchanged despite the new, noble veneer.

You (second person singular pronoun)

Commoner women almost never use any version of the pronoun “you.” Instead, they will call a person by their name, either with or without a title depending on their relationship to that person, or by a title only. Commoner men use おまえ(omae, written in hiragana) to say “you.”

Noble women also will usually refer to others by their name, though when they do use a pronoun, they use 貴方/貴女 (anata, either in masculine or feminine form depending on the gender of the person they are addressing, written in kanji). Noble men use 其方 (sonata, written in kanji) when speaking to people of equal or lower rank and 貴方/貴女 when speaking to those of a higher rank.

And then we have 君 (kimi, written in kanji), which I have only seen Ferdinand use, though I believe other men in the temple use it when referring to someone of a lower rank than they are (e.g., the former High Bishop Bezewanst uses it to refer to Myne in the anime, so I’m guessing he used it in the LN as well, though I have not read part 1 in Japanese). Ferdinand normally uses “anata” and “sonata” like any noble man--except when speaking to Rozemyne, who he calls “kimi.” It’s a regular reminder that their relationship began in the temple, not in noble society, and that he feels differently toward her than he does toward any other noble.

Titles in Ascendance of a Bookworm

No Title

This is used among commoners to indicate someone with whom the speaker has a close relationship. For example, Lutz just calls Myne “Myne” with no title attached. Among nobles, it is used when referring to someone of lower rank. For example, Sylvester calls Ferdinand just “Ferdinand” because he is his younger brother and a lower-ranking noble than Sylvester. Noble men will also use it to refer to those of equal rank, and retainers serving the same lord or lady use it regardless of rank to facilitate quick communication. 

-san (-さん）

This title only gets used within commoner society. It indicates distance in relationship between the two people interacting as well as a desire to speak politely. For example, Myne calls Benno “Benno-san” until she becomes a noble. Afterward, she drops the title to indicate that he is of a lower rank than she is, except when they are in the hidden room together and she reverts to her commoner speech patterns.

-sama (-様）

This title is used by commoners when speaking to nobles. It is also used by nobles. Noble men use it when referring to someone of a higher rank than they are. Noble women use it when referring to someone of higher or equal rank to themselves, including their husbands. For example, Cornelius calls Rozemyne “Rozemyne-sama” when he is on the job as her retainer, but when they are speaking as siblings, he just calls her “Rozemyne” because she is his younger sister and therefore lower in the family hierarchy. Rozemyne and Hannelore always refer to one another as “Rozemyne-sama” and “Hannelore-sama” despite their close friendship and equal rank. Eglantine refers to Anastasius as “Anastasius-sama” both before and after they are married.

Family Titles

These are used among both commoners and nobles, though they use different ones. Myne refers to Gunther as 父さん (tou-san, written in a combo of kanji and hiragana) and Effa as 母さん (kaa-san, written in a combo of kanji and hiragana). Lutz refers to them as Gunther-ojisan (Uncle Gunther) and Effa-obasan (Aunt Effa). Myne and Tuuli refer to one another with their names only, no family titles required, indicating that commoners are more relaxed about the hierarchy among siblings.

In noble society, different titles are used by men and women. Noble men use the following: 

Father = 父上 (chichi-ue, written in kanji) and Mother = 母上 (haha-ue, written in kanji)

Older Brother = 兄上 (ani-ue, written in kanji) and Older Sister = 姉上 (ane-ue, written in kanji)

Uncle = 叔父上 (oji-ue) and Aunt = 叔母上 (obaue) 

Grandfather = お祖父上 (ojii-ue, written in a combo of hiragana and kanji) and Grandmother = お祖母上 (obaa-ue, written in a combo of hiragana and katakana)

Noble women use:

Father = お父様 (otou-sama, combo of hiragana and kanji) and Mother = お母様 (okaa-sama, hiragana and kanji) 

Older Brother = お兄様 (onii-sama, hiragana and kanji) and Older Sister = お姉様 (onee-sama, hiragana and kanji)

Uncle = 叔父様 (oji-sama, kanji) and Aunt = 叔母様 (oba-sama, kanji) 

Grandfather = お祖父様 (ojii-sama, hiragana and kanji) and Grandmother = お祖母様 (obaa-sama, hiragana and kanji).

Myne also uses yet another set of family titles to refer to her adoptive family! Sylvester is 養父様 (tou-sama, literally “adoptive father-sama,” written in kanji) and Florencia is 養母様 (kaa-sama, literally “adoptive mother-sama,” written in kanji). She also often calls her older brothers by their names with nii-sama attached, such as Wilfried-nii-sama, as opposed to just by onii-sama. This is probably to distinguish among her multiple older brothers.

Other Titles

A variety of other titles get used in place of calling people by their name or pronouns, both in commoner and noble society. For example, Mark exclusively refers to Benno as 旦那様 (danna-sama, kanji), a title that Lutz begins calling Benno as well once he begins working for him. 

Myne refers to Ferdinand as 神官長 (shinkancho, “High Priest,” kanji) almost exclusively until she becomes a noble. Then she refers to him as Ferdinand-sama when they are outside the temple but still shinkancho when they are in the temple, up until he stops being the High Priest (;_;). She also usually drops the -sama when referring to him in her inner monologue, further indication that while she can walk the noble walk, she doesn’t really believe in the hierarchy.

Professors of the royal academy get called -sensei. Giebes, Aubs, and the Zent also get called by their titles sometimes in place of their names, sometimes in addition to their names. 

Formal vs. Informal Registers in AoAB

I’m not going to list every single word that is different between different registers here because that would be way too long. However, I’ll give some examples. 

Commoners generally speak in an informal register all the time, unless they have been trained to speak politely to people of higher-rank. They use contractions such as -って (-tte, written in hiragana) to mean “said,” and they also often drop the ends of sentences entirely. When they do use verbs, they use the simple dictionary form, e.g. - aru instead of arimasu. Male commoners will often use interjections such as “na” or “ze” or “zo,” which makes their speech sound manlier and rougher. They also tend to use “da” instead of “desu.”

Any commoner who has been trained to use polite language will tend to use the politest forms when speaking to nobles, e.g. - gozaimasu instead of arimasu.

Nobles in general will use politer forms of verbs except in very private, relaxed situations. For example, 参ります (mairimasu, kanji and hiragana) instead of 来る (kuru) or おっしゃる (ossharu, hiragana) instead of 言う (iu, kanji and hiragana).

Noble women have extremely restricted speech patterns. They always speak in the polite or politest registers. For example, a noble woman speaking to a social equal or inferior might use “arimasu,” but when speaking to a social superior, she will use “gozaimasu” or “irasshaimasu.” They also say えぇ(ee, hiragana) to say “yes” instead of the more familiar “hai.” Noble men will use あぁ (aa, hiragana) to say “yes.”

Noble men have a little more freedom in their forms of speech. Many will use informal masculine speech when speaking to social equals or inferiors while still using slightly different vocabulary choice. For example, Ferdinand often says 解せぬ (gesenu, kanji and hiragana) instead of 知らない (shiranai) to say “I don’t know.” They will switch to the polite (but not necessarily politest) forms when speaking to someone slightly above them in rank and reserve the politest forms for those very high above them. However, some men will choose to use polite language all the time, even when speaking to social inferiors.

This is especially notable in the speech patterns of Anastasius vs. Sigiswald. Anastasius chooses to use more stripped-down, rougher language when speaking to social inferiors, whereas Sigiswald still uses “anata” and -masu endings when speaking to social inferiors such as Adolphine and Rozemyne. It demonstrates a stark difference between the two princes’ personalities and how they wish to present themselves to the world.

Another notable use of informal vs. formal is when Myne is in a hidden room with someone who knows of her commoner past. She’ll revert to how she spoke as a commoner. My favorite instance of this is in Part 4 volume 8 when she and Ferdinand are in his hidden room just after she learned he is leaving. As she grows more and more emotional with her threats, she loses the ability to speak in noble speech patterns and starts speaking to him the same way she would Lutz or Tuuli (</3).

In Conclusion

I know this has been a very long post, but hopefully those who are as in love with Bookworm as I am will find it interesting and useful. Kazuki-sensei does a masterful job of exploiting the Japanese language’s unique features to make this world and its characters come alive, and it’s unfortunate that English lacks easy equivalents to allow us to appreciate these effects in translation. When reading the text in Japanese, as long as you know which characters are present and what situation they are in, you can almost always guess who is speaking just from their speech patterns. 

In the English version, Quof will often insert a character’s name to let us know, and also will sometimes add clues such as “spoke in a very stiff manner” to replace the linguistic features lost in translation. I encourage those reading in English to keep their eyes peeled for these little insertions.

My hope is that the above can serve as a window into this aspect of world-building for some English-speaking readers!

[chaoskirin]

Book Review--Silverwing by Kenneth Oppel

I always read the reviews before buying a book, but I knew I was going to get this series anyway. I LOVE bats.

I need to put the "bad" first for this, because the rest of my review is glowing. This is a deviation from my norm, but if anyone's started reading the first few pages and thought, "Oh. No." I want to encourage you to KEEP READING.

So the reason I almost put it down after a couple pages because the beginning really doesn't catch my interest as much as it probably should. It seems like it's going to be a rivalry between Big Strong Bat Kid and Little Runt Bat Kid, and while the characters were supposed to be children, the author sort of used stereotypical child interactions, I guess is how I put it. The rival character is named Chinook, which I dislike. It's not really a great idea to name your characters after Native American nations, especially one that's been so repeatedly shafted by the American government. So I have to take points off for that.

In any case, Chinook has a lot of lackeys, one especially, that pretty much kowtows to everything he says. I can't remember lackey's name, though, because thankfully he disappears after the first chapter and is never heard from again.

Interactions after that are MUCH more natural, and I truly enjoyed reading the entire rest of the book. The main character, Shade, is a "newborn," which just means he was born that year. He is capable and decent at hunting, but is slightly naive due to his youth. This is played with wonderfully in the story, and is even mentioned in relation to the other main character, Marina, who is a year (or two, perhaps) older then him. She knows more, and he even calls her a know-it-all in his meta at one point because of her larger span of knowledge.

This story also doesn't treat adult characters as idiots who have to capitulate to the limited knowledge of their own children. Shade has some role models, including Frieda, the elder of his colony, and his mother, Ariel. As well as a mysterious white bat named Zephyr, who has special abilities that have come with blindness and age.

The plot, in summary, is that Shade wants to see the sun, which is forbidden for bats because of their lack of taking a side in an ancient war. The owls patrol the dawn and dusk for any bats who haven't roosted, and are entitled to kill them to maintain the law. When an owl catches Shade out as the sun rises, the king of the owls demands that his colony give him up so he can be killed. That's sort of another problem I have with the book--adult characters of other species (owls/pigeons/etc) have no compulsion to give children any sort of break. It's EXTREMELY cold-hearted, but I can't really take any points off for that. I'm not going to spell out exactly why here, but we've seen the worst in people lately, and I can't really fault the author for discussing things that are happening, for real, in 2023.

Anyway, the colony refuses to give Shade up, despite the protestations of another bat elder, and this starts a war with the owls.

When Shade gets separated from his mother, he has to find his way to a place called the Hibernaculum, but he's not on his own. He meets another young bat, whom I previously mentioned, named Marina.

They also meet the trilogy-long villain, a meat-eating bat named Goth. Goth is a killer, and the actions of him and his lackey, Throbb, mean I find this book a little inappropriate for younger children. I would personally bump the age rating up to 5th grade at the earliest. He's a killer, and has no qualms about dispatching anyone who gets in his way--as well as keeping those alive who are still useful to him. He's an extremely effective villain.

I do want to note here that one other reviewer was like "bats can't do _" and I want to remind everyone that this is a fantasy world. No continents are named--only places--and the animals have been in an uneasy truce for millions of years after a devastating war. They are intelligent, capable, and interesting. I would love to see more worldbuilding, but the amount we got was plenty for me to be able to understand that this takes place on an alternate, fantastical version of earth.

Without posting any spoilers, I can say that the end of the book is satisfying and pretty awesome, and I really couldn't wait until even the next night to start reading it. I immediately opened book 2 (Sunwing) to see what happened next. This review is just for book 1, though, which I thoroughly enjoyed. I can only take one star off for the beginning and the use of Chinook as a name, but I highly recommend this to both appropriately-aged kids and adults.

[anotherrosesthatfell]

Fuck, the motivation are attacking me 💀

Welcome to what if characters opinion- today we will have the loveless ship children- (Nightmare x Frieda) by @chaoticwriting

The storyline be like: Dream found a little too late-

The children is 18 and I am too lazy to count the other ages

Merciless opinion on people he knows

Nightmare (passive)

"Father is kind to me and my sister. Sad thing mother couldn't see his kindness and neglect her duty as a mother."

Frieda Hanani

"Mother used to ignore us. Ever since the prophecy came, she been using me to interact with him. I don't understand mother and I don't think her plan bring good idea..."

Artemis

"I think my sister deserve the heir instead of me. Yet after the prophecy came, mother empress is planning to marry Artemis to the prophecy... I can tell Artemis hates the idea and the prophecy is being scared of it."

Nim

"Mother empress wasn't a nice person but she is alright. Perhaps she is getting old, she don't have much energy to execute people in old days."

Dream

"like I said, the prophecy is a nice man. He never wanted any of this in first place but he do it to save his lover from dying. So he exposed his origin to mother empress."

Hope

"This is the Prophecy lover. Her name is Chara Hope, a witch who was caught doing witchcraft but she has been living in the castle with me. She's a great woman... Uhm... Don't tell this to anyone but I wish Miss Chara is my mother instead... She is very kind and always cook me delicious meal."

Alphonse (corrupted Nightmare)

"Oh, the general? He is very strong and I admire him quite a lot. I would like to learn swordsmanship with him one day..."

Artemis opinion on people she knows

Nightmare (Passive)

"Father is too weak in my opinion. Sure do people call him tyrant emperor or whatever but is he really a tyrant? Nu-uh. Father is too weak to fight against mother's abusive act."

Frieda Hanani

"if possible, I want to change my mother. I'm glad I don't look like this horrible woman."

Merciless

"I don't like my brother that much. I do have many reasons for it. One is, he looks like mother. Second, he is weak like father. Both easily manipulated."

Nim

"if committing treason is legal. This old lady will die in my hand. Who the fuck think it's a good idea to engage a 18 years old girl with 27 years old man who literally has a lover!"

Dream

"pretty much I don't like this so called prophecy. I don't say he is weak but he is smart at bargaining."

Hope - before meeting

"This is the witch that the prophecy love so much? I don't see what so special about her... Even my brother fall over heels for her."

Hope - after meeting

"She's officially my mother now. If she die, I will kill everyone then me. I understand why my brother like her so much....-"

Alphonse (corrupted nightmare)

"General Elric? I have so many respect for him. He's a good man. Plus his daughter is the cutest."

[ninjamonkeystudios]

RL kind of dragged me away from OC-Tober. So, I’m trying to catch up on my OC list to see if I can slide in under the wire.

Character names/descs below the cut.

Portrait page, L to R, top to bottom

Natsume: a character from Damn Ninja MUX and online, text-based Naruto rpg site. She and her twin brother served under Ibiki as part of the information extraction team. The official story is they were Rain Clan orphans taken in by a Leaf family. The real story, of course, is a bit darker.

The twins were both marked with a third eye on their forehead and typically hid it under their hitai-ate. When they did activate their special technique, Natsume could peer briefly into the future and her brother had unerring aim.

Dindanni: She was a porpoise aspect member of the Melusine Clan of Changelings from a text-based MUSH set in Seattle. She frequently dragged her friend, the son of a minor noble, out on her adventures to interact with the human world while avoiding detection.

Ume DelaVale: From an in-person Final Fantasy homebrew D&D game, Ume was a Summoner from the Hidden Vale (Hidden Valley Ranch). She and her Carbuncle companion set off to discover why the Eidolons had gone silent.

Candra: A Bard/rogue who was trying to earn a living on her feet rather than on her back. After her father died, her mother had to take on his debts which thrust his surviving family into a precarious position. Candra, who had already been apprenticed to a fairly vapable musician found she would have to take on some less than wholesome side gigs if she wanted to help her mother.

This was the only character that another player had threated with saying, “If my character found out she was [withholding] treasure, he would kill her so fast.” Well, he never did and nyeh on you, roll-player 😛

Darlene: Technically an NPC but I used her repeatedly as she tried to uncover the conspiracy that surrounded the Lindblum Regency on the Final Fantasy MUX. She was a Lilty character based on the Crystal Chronicles games and a tenacious little pest.

Cid Fabool disappeared long ago when the FF worlds converged and since then, several Regents have taken his place for good or ill. They seemed to resemble one another more than a little, so there was a conspiracy theory someone was creating clones to control the city. Not entirely off as several of the Regents were Genomes from the FF9 game, lol.

Jubei: A character within the Ninja Monkey comic setting, Jubei was a ronin character I used for some short side story diversions.

Next Page:

Chase and Frieda were created on an adult-only oekaki board when that was a thing. Each image was a little snippet of the struggles of school life and Chase’s “little” secret.

[anamelessfool]

OC pride asks

For Primo: 6

For you, the writer: 14, 16, 18

OC Pride Asks

I'm 36, and there's a lot of stuff that's new now compared to twenty years ago. I've come into my own and found a label for myself (queer), although I'm personally indifferent to labels. But I think it's important to a lot of people and I support anyone who chooses a label. So that's where I'm coming from, and my characters reflect that.

I have all the characters’ traits in my mind when I write them, but sometimes they just never explicitly come up.

6. How does your OC feel about labels?

I'm no queer history expert but I think we have a wider range of labels now than in the 1960s/70s. Primo didn't even explore much before he returned to the Church. He had a lot of anxiety about attraction before the liberated environment of the Satanic Church of the Void. (His brothers, having been raised in the Church, had no such hangups.) If he were around today he would describe himself as pan.

I suppose his journey reflects my own, a little.

14: Any ace/aro OCs?

Yes! I've had one that was in the first ever story I wrote (and I took it down to work on it.) He’s a Sibling named Friar who works and lives in a satellite Church that Terzo visits just before his forced retirement. He’s a voice of reason character for the main character who has got herself wrapped up in Satanic Church of the Void drama. Nobody ever really explicitly says “hey, I am —-!” But in the way he interacts with everyone is reflective of his total worldview.

16. Did you ever change an OC’s Identity when they were already established?

I did, yes, for plot purposes. I like to have a “straight” (straight like in “straight man” in a comedy sense) person or relationship to oppose a main character or relationship. Like a “ghoul that acts normal around humans/their mission” Edelweiss Ghoul/Earth Ghoul/Alpha Ghoul vs. Omega who falls for his summoner and breaks a lot of rules. That way the reader feels the stakes more and doesn’t make assumptions about characters based on their lot in life, just their personality. These two characters Pamela and Frieda from my next three fics (the pre-retirement Terzo one and two Secondo ones) I turned from sisters to romantically involved. The way they acted around each other and also as a foil for Secondo’s own relationship hangups felt more like a romantic connection than a sibling one. It was a lot more interesting and flexible for me that way, so I changed it.

18: Do you prefer to give your OCs specific labels?

They’re in my head but never specified unless I do a profile of them or someone directly asks me. Also, in regard to the ghouls human ideas of gender and sexuality don’t apply to them. If anything all my ghouls are gender-fluid if we are thinking from human standards. I try to have a lot of different ways to be a ghoul featured in my work so readers get that impression organically. They’re human-shaped because their summoner is human, and there’s multiple ways to be human-shaped and how each ghouls reacts to that is based on their own personality. Aether Ghoul was cis female and she/her in his previous tour 400 years ago, but Edelweiss Ghoul has always been he/him regardless of how his body was constructed at the time. When the ghouls are in their natural astral living space beyond their human-shaped vessels, they are all they/them, and choose the form they wish. And a lot of times the forms are animals or just concepts and not human shaped at all.

Thanks for waiting for my really really long response!

[sunnylucy31]

For the writing asks, 1, 4, and 9. ;)

Oh boy oh boy my first ask game ask!

1. Which of your fics would you keep the basic plot of but rewrite completely?

So I wouldn’t choose to rewrite any of my currently posted fics, but one of them actually IS a rewrite! My Life is Strange/Locked Tomb/Percy Jackson crossover, The Tomb of Time, originally started life as an OC centric fic for Percy Jackson. It was the first fanfic I ever wrote (hell, the first creative writing in general that wasn’t for school), so it had some. Issues. But the premise was sound, and it’s never stopped interesting me. So I’ve actually tried to rewrite it a few times. Internally I refer to each version as like, V1, V2, etc. TToT is technically V5, though the adjustment from OC centric to full blown triple crossover has obviously changed quite a lot. The old OC protagonists make cameos, though! And the OC antagonists are still around! Which leads perfectly into:

4. Do you have any OCs? Do you have a story for them?

Oh lord do I have OCs. Some of them have been with me for more than ten years now, even if they’ve fallen by the wayside in favor of crossover characters. My old protag trio still means a lot to me, even if Lucy, Cael, and Kat fit a bit too hard into the fantasy party stereotype of warrior, thief, mage. (And also, I stole Lucy’s name when I transed my gender lol. I always liked it and thought, “I’d like to name my daughter Lucy if I ever have one.” Well joke’s on me, I AM the daughter.)

As for OC antagonists… well, I won’t say too much about them here to avoid spoilers for TToT. But suffice to say I do have stories for them, and I really hope I can make them compelling. Frieda in particular embodies a lot of tropes I personally LOVE in an antagonist. I’m eager to get to the point in TToT where she starts interacting with the quest party.

More immediately, I’m also eager to get Gideon in the same room as Pierce and Siren. A fellow butch and a fellow redhead? And they’re both hot?! Poor girl doesn’t know what she’s in for. And Harrow definitely won’t be jealous, not at all.

9. Thoughts on cliffhangers.

I see you calling me out with this one Spooky, lol. Yes, I’m quite fond of chapter cliffhangers. Which is a bit unfortunate considering my penchant for leaving my fics unupdated for lengthy stretches of time, but what can I say? I’m always optimistic about how long the next chapter will take.

And if you thought the cliffhangers in TToT have been bad now, you’ve seen nothing yet, ehehehehe…

Thank you for the ask, Spooky! This was fun!

[madraleen]

Attack on Titan - Hajime Isayama Vol.13-16: A “there’s still a lot we can do inside... like knitting” commentary.

-Look at the cover of volume 13, all of my darlings on the cover looking badass.

-I read the chapter title “Squad Levi” and I’m just grinning from ear to ear.

-Eren did turn into an indecisive whiner for a bit, you’re right, Jean. You’ve both changed based on your experiences, isn’t it great

-D o m e s t i c i t y, help! Help, this is soft!

-Levi just loooves talking about toilet stuff.

-People get broken in such subtle ways throughout the story. So quietly. It’s not a huge flashy thing, and they’re still them when it comes to big moments, but in the small intimate moments they get more hesitant, more cautious.

-The fact that Hange’s answer “There’s still a lot we can do inside... like knitting” is said in earnest

-Hahaha, is Titan Eren writing with a freakin log?! Lmao, amazing.

-Yes, random person, Levi is smol bean, what about it?!

-The Survey Corps not working hard enough? The disrespect of the randos, ffs.

-I WANT TO READ THE J-POP NIGHTMARE ARC!

-What is this sulky Levi doing on the cover of volume 14

-”We just have to enthrone Historia Reiss as the Queen,” he says. There’s nothing JUST about that, Erwin!!

-The variety of outfits, I love it.

-Wait, Levi ACKERMAN? What’s he to Mikasa?!

-Well. That plan with Reeves went well. *cries in merchantese*

-See Squad Levi and Hange’s people turn into outlaws or sth

-Why do you show me people in hoods, I’m weak for fictional people in hoods.

-Hold up hold up, Kenny is also an Ackerman? Am I misunderstanding something? Am I experiencing a conundrum of Ackermans?

-The scale of everything is getting so big. And I really like the action scenes.

-To be Armin, to have killed your first human, and to have LEVI talking to you about it. True hell. He doesn’t have the manners is what I’m saying!

-Oh wait, he’s not doing too bad tonight. Way to go, Levi.

-When are we getting the juicy Levi backstory?

-”Captain Levi... in the flesh...” That’s right, Marlowe, that’s how I react too whenever Levi appears.

-”It was everyone’s individual choices that brought change to our world.” I’m crying and you can’t stop me.

-The fuck are they doing to Eren. The fuck is he in chains? RELEASE HIM!

-Yeah, no, I hate this the most, unchain Eren now.

-No!! Baby Titan Eren killed his father?!?! I gasped so loud (I assume he was also a Titan, with the whole turn into a Titan and eat a Human Titan so that you can control it?).

-No, I don’t buy the Grisha slander, we need to get to that basement.

-I’m gonna slap Historia so hard.

-Ugh, Baby Eren’s little hand on Grisha’s adult hand as he tries to stop him from injecting him, little baby :((((

-I’m reading this so consistently and intensely that I’m pretty sure when I’m done everything will be a blur.

-I can’t even imagine how angry the Survey Corps must be. I’m livid.

-Asdfsfd, Levi and Mikasa synchronized jump out of the smoke, help.

-Jean killed! Jean killed!

-The audacity to call Squad Levi et al monsters when Kenny’s gang was literally waiting to kill them in ambush!

-Listen to him, Historia, listen to Eren! (For context on how ridiculous I’m being, Eren is currently saying “Mmmff!! Mmmhh!!”)

-Oh, Levi’s Kenny’s nephew then? Mikasa’s cousin?

-I want to smack Historia so hard.

-Hold up hold up, Eren, easy there on the guilt trip. This family has had this damn power for one hundred years, why would FRIEDA change the world, why didn’t they change the damn world earlier, it’s not adding up!

-Thank you, Historia! Like I said!

-The masterful, masterful way that everything in Historia’s life has led to this moment. That every self-empowering interaction between two side characters led to Historia rejecting the serum.

-Shut up with your pseudo-shonen protag bullshit, Eren, you’re not being eaten, it’s bad for everyone if you DON’T keep on living, shut up shut up shut up!

-Historia responded with “Shut up, you stupid crybaby,” and now I love her.

-Yeah, so, fuck what I said, I love Historia. My apologies.

-”You hear me, shirtless wonder?!” Hahaha, J E A N!

[mambo-by-a-mile]

1. 3. 5. 7. 13.

What is the biggest headcanon deviation from the canon material that you have incorporated into the way you write your muse? Why did you come up with it?

Mambo being afraid of deep water which was never addressed in canon. I got that from the classic 'cats hate water', but also because he is small and I think large bodies of it would be something he would not do well against due to his build.

3. What is something that was never addressed at all in the canon material that you have independently developed for your muse?

Him being afraid of deep water, but also being a little bit insecure over his magic abilities not being as strong as Munk's, and the feeling of being seen as nothing more than a troublemaker. That is something I would like to explore a bit more on this blog sometime.

5. What is an aspect of your muse’s canon material or canon existence that you never had the opportunity to explore but really want to?

The above, but also a bit of his past before being an assistant, how he came to work for The Wizard and with Munk, and why he chooses to stay if he is so bored with his life of helping to keep the balance of good and evil in fairy tales.

7. For movie or TV muses, what is your muse’s favorite scene? Why? Can you show a screenshot?

Definitely when he pushed Frieda into the fiery hole in the floor at the risk of nearly falling in himself. He got a little hero moment, and I feel it showed that he is willing to get dangerous for his friends when the time calls for it and hardly thinks about what he is doing when it comes to them. He was even surprised he did that afterwards!

Also, the scene where he tells Ella that she should think about what she wants for herself and go for it. Little word of encouragement after he got to know her as a person rather than a character from a fairy tale and could tell something was bugging her moments before, so I find it all the more sweet.

13. What canon character do you really wish your muse could interact more with?

Any of the incarnations of fairy tale or story characters from other media such as Disney films, Hoodwinked, or the Shrek franchise, or any fantasy franchise character overall due to how well he would fit into an of those universes. It's fun to think about how he would interact with characters from other fairy tales or fairy tale-esque stories besides Cinderella and help oversee their own happy endings.

[tehuti88-art]

8/16/24: r/SketchDaily theme, "Free Draw Friday." This week's characters from my anthro WWII storyline are Frieda Orchudesch, her father Herr Orchudesch (no first name given), and Hans von Adel. The first two unwittingly help inspire Josef Diamant to start working for the resistance; while Hans is unrelated to them, he's Ratdog's/Adel von NN's grandson (son of his daughter Tatiana), who's named after his deceased son Hans von NN. There'll be more about them later in my art Tumblr and Toyhou.se.

Regarding their design, the Orchudesches are German spaniels (I'm iffy on the father's hairstyle), while Hans is meant to resemble both his grandfather and his namesake quite a bit.

TUMBLR EDIT: Placeholder text due to Tumblr's backdating changes. Please check back later for more info.

Following text will be modified for the next entries.

I haven't much to say about Hans von Adel. He barely appears in the plot, long past the main story, just after his birth and to his baptism. He's a sleepy little baby who doesn't do much aside from being carried around by his mother. Rather, it's the impact he has on his grandfather, Ratdog/Adel, which is the main point.

By the time Hans is born, Adel has suffered through just so much loss and heartache that he's barely holding on. His adult children, Godfrey and Tatiana, can tell something is wrong, but don't know how to deal with it; Tatiana tries turning her father to religion, but is stunned to learn he's an atheist. Godfrey, upon learning that Tatiana is pregnant (like their father with his first son--their half-sibling--Hans von NN, this is the result of a one-night thing), urges her to inform Adel as soon as possible rather than hold off; he's worried she may not get another chance. To her relief, Adel isn't angry or disappointed (he'd be a big hypocrite if he were); despite being single, Tatiana wants to keep the baby, and Godfrey promises to help her, so all seems well. The pregnancy goes as expected, Tatiana has her baby boy, and Adel is invited to come meet him. The new grandfather gets a rare wistful smile on his face as he cradles the sleepy-eyed baby in his arms. Then Tatiana gingerly asks if it would be okay to name him after her deceased half-brother, Hans von NN.

Both of Adel's children notice his reaction. His head pops up and his smile vanishes, blood draining from his face. Tatiana flinches a little bit, ready to start apologizing, and even Godfrey gets ready to say something to settle the situation, yet before either of them can speak, Adel's eyes water up and he swallows, blinks a few times, and lets out a breath. He manages a shaky smile; "Of course," he murmurs, "of course you can name him Hans." And he looks back down at the baby, who sleepily blinks, and Adel's smile grows; he touches his forehead to the infant's. "Willkommen, Hans," he whispers.

All seems well again...but Godfrey has misgivings. Adel wishes his children goodbye and heads home; unknown to him, Godfrey follows not long after. What happens next is outlined in EDELGARD'S ENTRY.

Tatiana takes Adel's death the hardest (though it hits Elias Baswitz, the one who found him, pretty hard as well). She'd intended to ask him to be Hans's godfather, yet now she'll never get the chance. And of course, she blames herself; nothing Godfrey or any of her father's acquaintances say can convince her otherwise. Only Otto Himmel manages to finally get through to her, as he has plenty in common with her father and herself and so isn't dismissive or misunderstanding of her pain. Because it turns out her fears aren't ENTIRELY unfounded...her final interaction with her father indeed impacted him deeply, and played a role in his decision to end his own life. Just not quite for the reasons she thinks.

Tatiana never quite understood all the inner wounds her father carried; he hid them well, his weary eyes and general air of sadness and resignation being the only tells. Only the people who knew him during the war, like Himmel, could see how much he'd changed. Even the emotionally sensitive Godfrey never had any idea how deep his father's grief was. Adel did his best to shield his children from it, and so never talked about it with them; after the death of their mother Didrika, he carried his pain alone.

Didrika's death dealt Adel a harsh blow...yet it wasn't the worst pain he felt, or even the second worst. He also lost his parents, his sister, his son, and his soulmate, before he lost her. Hans's death, partly due to his negligence, was the deepest wound that never healed, followed very closely by the death of Godfrey Klemper, which he also blamed on himself. Only Didrika's intervention kept him alive afterward (well, after she tried to kill him); she, too, had just lost her soulmate, so they were in a good position to understand each other. Adel never talked much about Hans except to Klemper, who had to needle it out of him. Although he never wanted kids, and resented Hans's intrusion on his life to begin with, he soon grew to love his son dearly, and made him the center of his world. Of course Hans's early death devastated him like little else, and hung over him like a shadow all the rest of his life. Klemper's death merely echoed Hans's in provoking Adel's sense of guilt that he felt he should have done more to prevent it. So in that way, those two deaths connected themselves in his head. Add to this the vague feeling he'd already developed that he was "cursed" somehow...and then came Tatiana's request, to use Hans's name again.

Back to present tense for a bit. Adel is abruptly jarred. His first, irrational thought is to say NO!--you can't do that. Hans is dead, his name dead with him. Don't bring him back. Don't curse your own child with a name and a legacy like that. Why would you tempt fate...? But just as quickly he shoves that thought down--Didrika named his second son Godfrey, and Tatiana is named after someone who is dead, why is this a bad decision only now? It feels different, it feels wrong, but there's no rational reason, and he can tell it means a lot to Tatiana--he knows she's just appealing to him, trying to be a good daughter--so he swallows his protest, and gives his blessing. He sincerely means it, he's not reluctant or under duress; it's time the old curse was broken, maybe resurrecting Hans's name will do it.

But the blow has already been dealt. Like a hammer striking the unsteady foundation of an old house; the hammer didn't make the foundation unsteady, the hammer can't even truly be blamed for the house toppling to the ground, yet it did deal the final blow in a lifetime of them. Adel reaches home and breaks down. Everything hits all at once; the foundation crumbles. It's not Tatiana's fault--she played a role, yet she's not to blame, something only Himmel can explain to her later on. Adel himself has never had the words to make sense of his emotions, one reason he never discussed them. All he knows is the old wound just tore wide open again and he misses Hans and he misses Klemper and he doesn't know how to deal with it anymore, it just hurts too much. He's tired of hurting; he just wants rest, wants peace. To not have to feel anything anymore.

Himmel has been there. Tatiana asks why he's still here and all he can say is that circumstances are infinitely different for everyone; just because someone chooses differently doesn't make them weak. He tells Tatiana that, although there is free will, there is also Schicksal, fate; some people can change it, some people can't. Adel was almost certain to follow the path he did whether Tatiana made her request or not; something else would have taken her place. Everyone is connected, one action influences another, and you can never account for every resulting action; like ripples in water; one ripple might be the last one to strike a stone before it falls in two, but it's not to blame for all the ripples that wore away the stone before it. Tatiana is involved in Adel's death, but so is he, so is Godfrey, and Didrika, and Klemper and Hans and Edelgard and on and on and on; yet none of them were the one who killed him. He made that choice himself. All she can do is pray for him, and raise her own Hans the best she can, raise a grandson who would make his grandfather proud.

Tatiana wipes her tears. She has her own wounds to deal with now, but she resolves not to do it alone, the way her father thought he had to. She asks if, in his place, Himmel will be Hans's godfather. She worries this request will hit too hard like the request to her father did. Yet Himmel's face lights up and he says, "Of course I will. I'd be honored. Danke."

[Hans von Adel 2024 [‎Friday, ‎August ‎16, ‎2024, ‏‎12:00:34 AM]]

[TUMBLR NOTE: Entry time edited to preserve proper entry order.]

[lonelier-version-of-you]

It’s still hysterical that characters tiptoed around Henrik’s sexuality while calling Jac gay to her face and assuming she was sleeping with various women. It makes it interesting as well that the psychiatrist seemed to think homophobia or biphobia played a part in Jac’s issues because that was a heavy hint I would’ve expected for Henrik if he’d been in that situation.

I mean remember Zosia’s pregnancy and all of whatever that was between her and Jac. Like when Zosia flirted with a patient to piss off Jac and then when Jac did get pissed off the whole ‘dead from the waist down’ thing. Fleur definitely thinking they had something going on. Frieda in general. Ariane.

It really is hilarious. And "It makes it interesting as well that the psychiatrist seemed to think homophobia or biphobia played a part in Jac’s issues because that was a heavy hint I would’ve expected for Henrik if he’d been in that situation"... don't, you'll get me starting a The Breakdown Storyline Was Meant For Henrik conspiracy theory. (I mean I'm joking but also, it would have fit just as well, if not better, if it had been Henrik, as obviously his breakdown would have been Gaskell-related.)

The Zosia pregnancy stuff was insane, it really was. What was going on there. What were you getting at there, Holby. (Also I'm still convinced Arianne and Jac slept together at that conference in that one episode. It's like a true, canon, "I genuinely don't think their interactions make sense if this didn't happen" fact to me the same way Henrik having slept with John on the night he tried to drown himself is.)

[nerdishfeels]

Summer readathon update!

Hey guys! Today, I finally finished Gilded by Marissa Meyer! I’ve now read three books (including Yolk from before) for the readathon which I’m really happy about! I’m hoping to finish at least one more before the end of the month. But in the mean time, here’s a mini review:

Gilded - 4⭐️

I really liked this unique take on the Rumpelstiltskin retelling. Even though it followed most of the parts from the fairy tale, I liked that the world building was more in depth, with different creatures and ghosts and such. It also had an interesting twist and a mystery that you figure out as you’re reading it.

I loved Serilda. She’s such a strong and interesting character who’s been made an outcast because of the golden wheels in her eyes, a gift from Wyrdith, the god of lies. I love the stories she would tell and how she could weave her way out of dangerous situations. But sadly her life does change drastically and not for the better.

Gild was an interesting character too. I didn’t warm up to him at first because he kept touching Serilda without her permission to feel her warmth and that made me kinda uncomfortable lol. But he started to learn and keep his boundaries until they grew closer. I was hoping for this to be the new favourite ship but it didn’t give me the kind of deep and emotional romance I wanted (which is happening a lot to me with every book I read and I’m guessing I have high expectations for romances that don’t just involve physical intimacy lol).

I appreciated that Marissa Meyer was trying to add some representation in this story too. There’s an awesome bisexual woman called Lorraine who is the mayor of a small town and has a crush on a lesbian librarian called Frieda. We don’t see a lot of their interactions unfortunately, but I loved the representation. I also thought it was interesting the discussion Serilda had with the children about the gender of the gods, how they can be whatever gender they want or neither.

It’s ironic that I wanted a light-hearted read because this grew increasingly dark lol. I don’t know if Marissa Meyer’s writing is getting darker lol but I guess it makes sense considering that most of the cruelty inflicted by the Erlking is to show how cold and unrelenting he is, but it did get to me a bit that children weren’t spared. Let’s say there’s a lot of doom and gloom in the second half lol. I just find it a bit annoying when the villain is considered invincible and that there’s no hope in the good guys winning because he’s always a step ahead and gets what he wants.

I was surprised to see how this is a duology (I knew as soon as I reached the end that there would be a sequel). I really hope there’s some light in the second and final book because I’m tired of seeing more and more suffering lol. The second book better sort out the Erlking in a satisfying fashion 😑

[januaryedgelordess]

I'd like to discuss a SnK theory with someone, it's on the possibility of a different (or expanded) AnR theory.

Disclaimer: Perhaps you should read this post with the lyrics for Akatsuki no Requiem by Linked Horizon in mind, but I also don't stand by the original reddit theory a 100%.

--

One of the questions that lingers around the fandom is: "who would've survived the Rumbling had it been done as originally implied by the themes and foreshadowing of the story?". Some believe only Eren and Historia would have had that chance, but they might be mistaken.

The first proof I have in order to back this claim is AnR's official art as drawn by WIT Studio during the production of season three of the anime:

(Note: these are originally four different images, the source of this collage is vaguely anitwt).

Just as shown in the original PV by Linked Horizon, each of these characters are standing by a gravestone while holding a bouquet and looking conflicted. Now, to counter the original AnR theorists, I propose that Eren —and by extension, Historia— weren't the only ones to live on with regret in their hearts, instead, Levi and Hanji survived as well.

Why did they survive? Is my conclusion solely based on these pictures? Well, just in part.

I believe Attack on Titan was never meant to be a one-sided story, and that one of the various themes that weren't thoroughly explored in the later chapters, a theme which was instead rushed and swiftly overlooked, is that of the conflict between "Nationalism" and "Internationalism". It's obvious and needless to point out that Yaegerists were the former, but the latter never take a name for themselves. However, we get a rough idea of who they might be, one of them is clearly Hanji Zoe:

Another internationalist is obviously Onyankopon:

Another one is Armin and so on, and so on.

Are they the only type on people on Earth? Of course not. Notably you also have those who have egotistical motivations, like Jean, who just wants to get married and live a peaceful life in the inner cities; or the Hizuru ambassador, Kiyomi, whose motivation is monetary gain. The world isn't black and white in AoT so, to clarify, it's unnecessary to classify every character in the dichotomy here presented.

Now, if Yams hadn't downplayed this interaction, we may have had a better thought out plan to stop the Rumbling and, possibly, a less moronically cringy way for "The Alliance" to be presented.

Why is that? It's because of various reasons. First, one of the most observant characters, Hanji, is notable for having spied on some of Eren and Historia's interactions (the "You look happy — that's because I am" scene for example) but by the end of the story the audience never got a reason as to why this observant behavior happened. If Hanji really is as cunning and observant as she is portrayed to be, she should've been the first character to suspect that Eren is the father and, therefore, that Historia's pregnancy's due date was off. Instead of the survey corps discussing this info, we get some random officers discussing irrelevant rumours about it. Isayama I mean, Kawakubo played Hanji Zoe dirty, in my opinion, in this scenario.

If Hanji had noticed that important information, and if that info had been shared with the Survey Corps, as was natural for her character to do, "the Alliance" may have had been able to act sooner against the AT.

Now, would more prep time save the world from devastation? No, I don't believe so. I believe it would, instead, make them have a slightly more realistic last fight by a) having them recruit actual soldiers and weapons for the final showdown, heck, if they have enough time even other countries would chime in, vs Hallu-chan and the Attach Titan; and, therefore, b) not having them rely on a Deus Ex Machina to defeat Eren.

That way, Hanji would live on with regret, knowing the Alliance did everything in their power to defeat the Attack Titan but failed miserably in the end. Instead of having her smile as her ghost-self at whatever the hell the canon battle achieved, she'd mourn the world that's been lost, and she'd feel regret for not being able to save it.

Now, for Levi I haven't done a thorough analysis yet, but I believe it's not difficult to see why humanity's strongest soldier would survive this ordain. I'd really like to hear someone else's thoughts on that matter.

Also, I'm in no way trying to imply LeviHan was supposed to be part of a kino ending, but I'm not too into that ship so I'd like to hear someone else's thoughts about it and on why they were the only two members of the alliance to survive according to WIT Studio's AnR official art.

Now, onto the second part of "who survived the Rumbling?". The next piece of information contradicts previous statements, and it also contradicts an AnR ending to some extent, but bare with me, please.

Exhibit A, Mikasa and Armin should have survived:

However, for Kruger's prophecy to succeed, I stand by my previous statement that "the Alliance" should've acted sooner, and that Armin is part of the Internationalist faction ready to "save humanity". Why do I believe that? It's easy, first, let's remember this quote from the moment Erwin died:

Note how, not only does Eren say Armin will save the humans, he also implies Mikasa will know it'll happen (so she'll be alive by the time the battle ends).

And, piggybacking on that moment as well, Armin would've been able to use his intellect to make a plan to divert the Rumbling titans. I'm adding this here to stress something that can't be stressed enough: Armin shouldn't have had to fistfight Eren twice, and he shouldn't have had to steal someone else's kill. Now onto that kill...

Should Mikasa have been the one to deal Eren's final blow? In the canon version of the story it's shown, in a rather cringy way, how she has to make up a whole different scenario inside her mind to get the mental strength to kill him. To me, Mikasa instead should've used the devastation caused by the Rumbling to completely break away from Eren's character and to be able to see past the "you're being brainwashed" narrative. Now, besides some of Isayama's interviews, there's other proof to back this up: the Historia-Mikasa parallels in Ending 4 and Ending 1:

Ending 1: https://youtu.be/O4wezNlsxB0

Ending 4: https://youtu.be/o05UK9lXtC0

We see some petty similarities in both: how both girls seem to be inside a pond or a lake, a snip of them running when they were young, etc.; but we also see some more important things for this theory: their growth as a person (how they survived whatever the past cast upon them), and them catching up to the people who they look up to and love.

Now, two things we know about Historia are that her beloved Ymir left her and she had to learn to accept it and move on; and that her sister, Frieda, died and she, without initially knowing even that she'd lost her, had to learn how to live on her own when she was young. Would Mikasa and Eren be able to have an end like that? I think it was implied that it was possible, but other than that, as part of any healthy development of her character, it is important for her to move on just as the Eldian Queen did: even if Eren chose to live a life apart from her (like Ymir did to Historia's early knowledge) or even if he were to die (like Frieda did).

Also, I have some doubts about Mikasa being the one who was supposed to kill Eren, since the one who was foreshadowed to be a Helos' parallel, and who'd fit the role just as well is Reiner, but I won't discuss that here.

So, to me, Mikasa was never an Internationalist, but for the sake of her character, a break-away from Eren should've been a good conclusive act.

As to some other parallels between Mikasa and Historia we have this part:

In which it is implied that they share the same burden by birth, and the same destiny, possibly. Mikasa is shown to be embarrassed about it but Historia seems to be thoroughly delighted.

With this parallel I'd also like to recall two other threads left undone: the Azumabito clan and the Ackerman mystery.

First, the Azumabitos. It's implied that their land is to "the Orient", and we also get a small snip during the Rumbling which implies they have a coast (it's obvious their country is a direct reference to Japan, needless to say). All of which would imply that, as it does in the Real World ™️, Hizuru is almost the Eastern-most Nation of AoT's world as well, and therefore, it may be one of the last countries that the Rumbling would have reached. If you add that they were the first people to send an ambassador to Paradis, you get: Hizuru being the first nation to be included in a possible Internationalist "Alliance" (had it been done in the appropriate time) against the Attack Titan; and you also get that this would increase their possibilities of surviving, at least just in part, the Rumbling.

Why is this important? Because AnR's lyrics do not imply the world will be completely and absolutely obliterated. AnR's lyrics imply the world will live on but the power dynamic of the world will be reversed: Paradis will rule, while the rest will be forced inside the cage.

https://www.musixmatch.com/lyrics/Linked-Horizon/Akatsuki-no-Requiem-TV-Size

Now, the Ackermans. Just as Historia and Zeke posses a special particularity by virtue of birth (they are direct descendants of Ymir), which make them valuable assets to "breed" for whoever is using the Eldians (be it Marley, the Azumabitos, or the First King), I believe the outside world would be interested, at any part of the story, to have an Ackerman in their line of defense against the Eldians. In this case the Mikasa-Historia parallel is strengthened, simply because it would be interesting to see Levi or Mikasa confront that part of their destiny (to make the Ackerman clan continue for the sake of a plan, while acknowledging they're the only survivors). Perhaps Hizuru would've been the country to try and make use of that potential? This parallel was, of course, never used, but it would've been delightful to see it exploited at some point in the AoT timeline. However I acknowledge that continuity is impossible in a world without titans, unless one of the surviving countries on Earth are in serious need of Olympic competitors, of course, so perhaps it should've been mentioned before The Rumbling arc.

.

Well, this turned out to be more like a vent or a rant than a theory now, and I wish I could've had discussed it quietly with someone instead of just posting it here. There are some other nuances to this analysis that I would like to explore in the future (since this isn't thoroughly thought out) In the meantime what do you all think of a new AnR theory like this one? Does it make a little sense? At least a bit? I hope so. Thank you for reading and sorry about the grammar mistakes.

TLDR: I believe Armin, Mikasa, Eren, Historia, Hanji and Levi should have survived and also it's possible for Hizuru to have survived. Please feel free to point out any flaws.

[jujujitsu]

AoT and their favorite Disney Movies

My head cannons regarding some AoT characters, their favorite Disney/ Pixar movies, and why.

WARNING: AOT SPOILERS

Reiner Braun- Wreck it Ralph

Reiner would relate to Ralph on so many levels. Just like Reiner, he wants the respect of his people so he sets out to prove himself. They are also known for smashing stuff. There's also the character Felix which could be similar to Bertholdt and how Bertholdt always had to balance out Reiner and remind him of his goal. Not to mention, Felix falls for this one bad-ass female character similar to Annie. Then you have Princess Vanellope's situation which is a little similar to Historia and her turbulent drama with her dad. Historia and Vaellope's real identities weren't known and the end, they are both royals, exploited by the people around them. So based of the connections he would make with his real life, I think Wreck it Ralph would be Reiner's favorite movie.

Historia Reiss- Inside Out And Frozen I

I chose Inside Out because of the transition we see in Historia Reiss through AoT. Joy has control over the main character Riley until Sadness touches a core memory. We see Historia go from this positive, loving, cheerful person to...well, not. Sadness and Joys dynamic in the movie would resonate with her so much, especially when they start working together. Seeing Riley accept her new life and transition into a better person would be inspirational to her.

Frozen I is her other go to movie because of several reasons. Anna gets the knowledge of her sister's powers erased and that would remind her of Frieda Reiss. The isolation of the kingdom of Arendelle would also resonate strongly in her because it would remind her of Paradis as a whole. Anna's self sacrifice to save Elsa from Hans would make her think of Ymir and what she did for her. Seeing Elsa mourn for her sister causing her to be freed from the spell would also catch her in the feels.

Zeke Yeager- Zootopia

Okay, first, this is a movie about animals and he is the Beast Titan, so it just makes sense. On a deeper level, we see the dynamic between predator and prey in Zootopia. While watching, I see him making a connection to Marley and the Eldians and this just draws him in so much more. When the Predators go "savage", he would have a moment where he goes, "OMG JUST LIKE THE ELDIANS BECOMING TITANS!" When Officer Judy comments about predatory biology being the reason behind predators going "Savage" and the fall out occurs where they are discriminated, you better believe Zeke felt that on a personal level as an Eldian. AND THEN, when the plot really comes out and there's a serum being used to make predator's savage because of it, he just loses it and this instantly becomes his favorite movie.

Armin Arlet- Moana

Armin's drive to go beyond the Wall is to see the ocean, so Moana makes the most sense. What further solidifies this as being his favorite movie is Moana's desire to go beyond the reef even though her father forbids it because it's dangerous. This resonates with him because he has lived behind the walls and cannot go out because of the Titans. Moana reminds him of Eren, especially when Maui and her face Te Ka and she refuses to turn back against their better judgement. Maui's fishhook is damaged because of the confrontation. Eren's decisions often led to dire consequences. The ocean automatically makes this his favorite, while the other connections just seal it for him.

Sasha Braus- Brave

Obvious reason, Merdia uses a bow. The drama between Merida and her mother makes her reflect on what's going on between her dad and herself. Sasha retaliated and joined the military. Merida retaliated and competed for her own hand in marriage and she just thought that was the most kick ass thing. Then, when Merida sought to repair the relationship with her mother, she felt that on a personal level.

Niccolo- Ratatouille

It involves food and Niccolo is a chef, however, things can get a little deeper with this one too. One underlying dynamic that might really drive this home for Niccolo is the division and later the collaboration between humans and the rats. Humans view rats as vermin, but because of Remy, Alfredo Linguini becomes a chef. He was a Marley soldier and he hated the Eldians, but because of his capture and time, he became a chef and he stamped out most of his racism because of his interactions AND he fell in love with an Eldian, Sasha Braus in the process. So, this movie would hands down be an automatic favorite for him.

Ymir- Frozen I and Mulan

Ymir would enjoy these movies because she's all about people revealing who they truly are. In Frozen 1, Elsa hides her powers because she's afraid of what others will think and she doesn't want to scare people. This reminds Ymir of everyone she's interacted with who are in similar situations including Sasha with her accent, Historia with her royal ties, and her self as a Titan and former Eldian from Marley. And the fact that Elsa and Anna didn't need a man to accomplish all this was a huge plus. You know she thought of Historia. I also bet she joked and stated Hans was Reiner just out of spite.

Mulan is a favorite because of a similar reason. Mulan hides her identity to enlist in the military and does this as an act of self-sacrifice. While Ymir states she is living for herself, we know this isn't true because of the choices she makes in the end. She automatically will think of Historia/ Krista during their time in the 104th. And the LGBT vibes from Shang and Mulan/Ping are icing on the cake.

Conny Springer- The Emperor's New Groove

I don't have much of a thorough explanation as to why this is Conny Springer's favorite, but I just felt in my gut that he would get the biggest kick out of it. Especially Kronk because the running joke as that he and Sasha are the idiots of the 104th and Kronk is...well, he is Kronk. He also finds Kuzco's narcissism hilarious because he referred to himself as a genius throughout his time in the 104th. He had no business talking himself up that much but he laughs about it now. I think on very serious level, Kuzco's plan to build over Pacha's village would sort of draw him in considering what happened to his own village.

Levi Ackerman and Erwin Smith: Wall-E

I chose Wall-E because Levi is a clean freak and he hates litter and so I imagine when new recruits ask him why he cleans so much, he sits them down and makes them watch this movie. Since Wall-E was in this trashy awful wasteland to which he continuously cleans, Levi would be reminded of the Underground and EVE is literally Erwin Smith. Just like EVE and Wall-E they end up trying to uncover some sort of truth. The Scout Regiment is labeled as a bunch of degenerates and the government seeks to undermine them all the time. During the royal government arc, we see the other branches turn on the Scout Regiment because Erwin and the crew are trying to serve humanity and uncover the truth about the Titans. So when Wall-E and EVE are labeled rogue robots and they have to struggle to save the plant to show the ship's captain, he gets some serious feels. That resonates big time. Follow that up with AUTO trying to keep the information Wall-E and EVE have uncovered quiet, and you can see why Wall-E is Levi's favorite movie and you know he watches this with Erwin all the time.

[kickingitwithkirk]

Greetings from Austin pt. III

Pairing: Alpha!Jensen Ackles x Alpha!Jared Padalecki x Omega!OFC

Summary: Jensen and Jared are at odds over a monumental decision that changes their lives in a way they couldn’t have envisioned.  

WC: 3825

Warnings: a/b/o, bisexuality, biphobia, homophobia, angst, cursing, self doubt, depression/anxiety, married life/disagreements, medical stuff, sexual dysfunction, infertility/surrogacy

*flirting, m/m oral sex, Jensen’s insecurities are coming out, Jared gets arrested, both get counseling

A/N: This part consists of several time jumps over four month period.

A/N II: Hey, sorry took me a way longer to get done than planned, rewrote Oct 23 a dozen times alone and hoping makes sense, trying to flesh out characters more and has some stuff that plays into story line in later parts.

Part II

Masterlist

@winchesterandbeyondbingo​​​​​​ square filled-Jensen Ackles

*Series Inspired by this art.

*no beta-all mistakes are mine

September 8th

7:30 am

Jensen was sitting in the makeup chair clenching his extra strong coffee container to help warm his hands. He’d spent a second, uncomfortable night in his trailer on location as Vancouver was having an unusual cold snap this time of year and with the covid restrictions the director decided that everyone needed to stay on site.

While he wasn’t happy about the weather, missing his own personal heater but at the same time grateful for a brief break from Jared now that they were heading towards the next phase of starting their family.

Jensen jokingly said they needed a code name since they were planning on keeping their plans a secret, even from their families, until the pups were born, playfully suggesting a cartoon from their childhoods.

Of course with Jared’s weird sense of humor, he loved it and started throwing ideas like operation: pound puppies.

“Penny for your thoughts.” Frieda said as she applied a concealer under his eyes to hide the dark smudges from not sleeping well.

“Huh?”

“You asked about my new job and haven’t heard anything I’ve said, wanna talk about it?”

“Sorry, not focusing very well today.”

“Yeah, we’re all feeling out of sorts with this being the last couple days.”

Jensen couldn’t believe he was down to his last two days of filming.

“Too bad this virus messed everything up, it would’ve been a hell of a send off if everybody could have been here.”

Alex and Misha had left right after they’d finished but Jim Beaver was back for the ending. It was only right for Bobby Singer to be there at the end, having been such a pivotal character in the brothers lives.

Frieda continues chatting about random things while finishing his makeup. A PA stuck his head in calling Jensen to the set. He stepped out of the trailer and smiled seeing his Baby sitting near the building being used as the exterior of Harvelle's Roadhouse.

***

September 12th

“Jen, I’m taking out the bags,” Jared calls out seconds before the apartment's front door shut.

Jensen was doing one last check around the place for any forgotten anything. Satisfied, he walked into the living room containing neatly marked boxes ready to be shipped back to Texas, relieved they had downsized from the big house Jared had years ago.

He stopped to gaze out the picture window when a pair of strong arms wrapped around his waist, molding his back to the muscular chest of his mate, who rested his chin on his shoulder quietly saying, “I’m gonna miss this view.” Jensen hummed in agreement tipping his head back as Jared nuzzled his neck.

“We need to get going if we’re gonna make Seattle by seven,” Jared softly muttered as they’d stood there for a few heartbeats longer before releasing him. They walked to the door and Jensen turned once more to gaze out the window at the view of Vancouver.

***

September 21st

“This has been a great trip but man, I’ll be glad to be in our own bed tonight.” Jared remarks as they drive past a green highway sign saying Austin 312.

“Can’t wait,” Jensen drowsily says having not slept much the last couple days. They had decided to road trip it back to Texas, stopping at a few places they had wanted to visit for awhile.

Jared somehow managed to finagal, okay so his mind numbing blow job combined with those lethal long fingers that always makes Jensen agree to anything got him a couple extra days in southern Colorado.

Jensen enjoyed the beautiful scenery and hiking in the mountains but hated camping out. Well, it wasn’t technically roughing it the way Jared liked but still.. a frigging yurt in late September?

Oy vay, what he did for love.

The sound of Jared singing along to some classic country song on the radio as he drove finally put Jensen completely out.

***

October 23rd

Turning from the open fridge with a puzzled expression on his face, Jared senses the same vague something he’s felt God knows how many times in the last couple months.

Shutting the door he walked over to the island counter where his husband was seated pushing his unfinished dinner around on his plate.

“Jen, what’s going on? Are you worried about the implantation? Dr. Rodgers said the embryos were healthy and optimistic the surrogate took this first try.”

What Jensen wants to ask, the question that’s plagued him since that day in August choosing their Omega surrogate...how the hell does he phrase it without upsetting Jared?

“Did you choose her because you knew she’d be the one I’d pick?”

Jensen slapped his hand over his mouth, eyes wide, disbelieving he blurted it out.

Jared worked to find a response squeaking an actual squeak before he could get control over his vocals, “That’s what I’ve been sensing!” Gripping the edge of the counter with his big hands, “Are you seriously going there again? I was honest about our interactions when I realized she was the one I knocked down at the clinic and FYI, you weren’t exactly in full control either Alpha!”

Jensen clenched his teeth at being reminded his inner need to be in control at all times slipped.

“I’ve racked my brains trying to figure it out how to ask something like that without upsetting you!” Jensen yells getting up and pacing around the kitchen.

Jared huffed, “So all this time instead of talking to me, you’ve conjured up some..”

“For the last two years I’ve gotten the sense you feel somethings missing, kept telling myself it’s your unfulfilled biology. But ever since you meet that Omega you’ve been.. I can’t explain it and now I’m second guessing our marriage Ja....” his rant abruptly cut off.

Jared’s eyes were glowing red, pinning him with an eerie wolf expression, the intensity disconcerting him. “I chose you, my husband, my soulmate, my everything!“ The words should have been reassuring but Jared’s voice was pitiless, something Jensen's never heard pass from his lips before.

Jared took a deep breath and with normalcy returning said, “I love you Jensen and I thought you understood, for me, in my mind, both of us having pups with the same donor means my offspring won’t be seen as just step relations but will grow up having strong familial ties with JJ, Arrow and Zeppelin.”

Jensen started to speak when a low, reverberating growl from Jared warning him not to interrupt.

“I consciously listened to my inner wolf when it came to choosing the person who is biologically the Om of our children and I,” Jared emphasizes tapping his chest with his long index finger, ”have no regrets but apparently you do.” Taking a deep breath Jared drops a non sequitur, ”The dogs need to be fed,” and walks away.

At the sound of Jared’s SUV leaving Jensen’s legs gave out and he drops to the floor curling up in a fetal position wrapping his arms over his head. Arlo and Koda laid down, one on each side, cocooning him between them.

***

Thanksgiving

“The kids are in a tryptophan coma,” Jensen announces as he walks in through the kitchen's back door. He had followed Danneel home afterwards helping get JJ and the twins cleaned up and put to bed, “they’ll be out till Monday.”

“Good, cause I’m dead on my feet,” Jared replies yawning while loading the dishwasher. It had been their turn to host the holiday with Danneel, the kids, Clif, Jared’s siblings and their broods.

“I told you to wait and I’d help finish the cleanup when I got back.” Jensen said as Jared started the machine.

“I figured you’d wanna stay awhile and be too tired and I didn’t want to deal with it tomorrow. All that’s left is to put the trash and recycling out, could you grab it?”

“On it,” Jensen picked up the bags walking around the side of the house dropping them into their designated receptacles.

When he came back in Jared was switching off the lights downstairs. They made their way up to the bedroom taking turns in the bath getting ready for bed.

Jensen was sitting with his back against the headboard checking his messages when Jared drops heavily next to him, “I plan on sleeping for the next three days.” He mutters resting his head against Jensen’s shoulder.

“Sounds good to me babe, I’m glad we didn’t schedule anything extra this weekend, be nice to spend some time alone.” He finishes wiggling his eyebrows.

“Hmm, do you remember last year's Thanksgiving?”

Jared closed the kitchen pantries door, pushing Jensen against it seductively lowering his fox slanted eyes huskily whispering, “I’m so fucking horny I need my dick you now.”

“Dude, we’re re in my sisters...“

“..you’ll have to be quiet,” Jared dove in for a deep, dirty kiss, grinding against Jensen until he was begging to be fucked.

“You’re the one who got us busted..oh fuck Jensen..so fucking tight..fuck..not gonna last..then later I get Mac saying it sounded like your dick...”

“Okay..buuut,” Jared tilts his head slowly running his tongue up the column of Jensen’s neck, “you gotta admit,” hand slipping under his sleep shirt, “our sex life,” long fingers tip toe up the smooth, freckled chest, pads teasing his left nipple as Jared nibbles on his earlobe, ”is never boring.”

Jensen groans, dropping his arm, still clinching the phone, tipping his head to expose more of his neck to Jared’s wondrous lips, enjoying the scratch of his short beard.

“I thought you were sleeping the next three days.”

Jared answers by removing his hand and straddling his husband's thick thighs taken the phone placing it on the nightstand and starts nibbling along the other side of Jensen’s sensitive neck, working his way to his slightly raised claim mark flattening his tongue licking the ultra sensitive spot that always drives his Alpha wild.

Jensen slides his hands up Jared’s back finding a grip in his shortened hair, unhappy about how much he’s cut off for Walker, unable to tangle his thick fingers into the soft tresses like he used to.

Finding a purchase he pulls hard making Jared groan at the pleasurable sensation tips his head back till it’s the perfect angle for Jensen to run his tongue across those candy pink lips, teasing them open to grant him access, continues teasing, alternating between caressing Jared’s tongue with his and sucking on his lips.

Moaning, Jared rocks his hips seeking friction, breaks their kissing long enough to work Jensen's sleep shirt off. They end up wrestling a few moments before Jared tosses it as Jensen’s lips attack his more desperately.

Tapping Jared’s thigh, Jensen rolls them kneeling between sleep pant clad legs watching as Jared reaches up gripping the strategically placed bar in their custom made headboard with both hands, his pecs flexing in anticipation of what’s to come.

Not breaking eye contact Jensen bends forward, his lips a hair's breadth from Jared’s, slowly slides backwards hovering, caressing the acres of golden skin beneath him with only his warm breath, pausing to hook his fingers in the pants waistband and pulling them with him as he continues journeying south.

Slowly making his way back north he leaves wet, open mouth kisses along the now naked, extra long, muscular legs he loves, sucking on the insides of both thighs, nipping hard enough to leave marks before arriving at his designated stop.

He hasn’t even touched Jared’s beautiful cock yet it’s fully engorged, resting against his flat stomach vigorously leaking precome. Jensen dips his tongue into his bellybutton lapping up the liquid collecting in it, cause fuck, he’s loves how more sweet than salty Jared’s always tasted.

Hips rolling Jared rubs his cockhead against Jensen’s tongue and he kitten licks the dribbling slit before resting his head on Jared’s lower stomach and wrapping his lips around the velvety head.

Shifting his grip on the bar Jared’s makes nonsensical noises, toes curling at the mixed sensations of his mates silky beard tickling his lower regions while sucking on his cockhead, alternates swirling his tongue over the nerves underneath and teasing his slit sending spikes of pleasure radiating through him.

After all these years Jared’s still amazed at Jensen’s knowledge of his body, his ability to keep him on the edge of not enough for however long he’s in the mood to play.

“..pleease...need to cum...got to..so fucking..uhh..Alpha!”

Raising up on a forearm Jensen starts bobbing up and down his shaft, pausing briefly on each downward pass, working his throat open to take Jared further in until he’s nose deep in dark, trimmed pubic hair. Holding his mate's substantial cock in his throat swallows around him as Jared’s knot inflates, pushing his jaws apart till it’s too much.

Letting the knot slip out from between his plump lips Jensen wraps a hand firmly around it and starts vigorously bobbing drawing out a litany of obscene noises, feels Jared’s balls drawing up and backs off swallowing the warm, thick, spurting liquid.

Leisurely licking until Jared hissed, too sensitive for anymore kisses the tip one last time crawls back up the bed searching for his pillow and face plants on it.

“Dude, you’ve finally sucked out my last brain cell.”

Purring deep in his chest, Jensen gives Jared a self satisfied smirk, who mutters, “wasn’t trying to give you a bigger head.”

Rolling onto his side Jensen displays his turgid cock needing attention, “okay, he’s the bigger head,” Jared concedes reaching down running his fingers over the weeping tip, wetting them with precome spreads it over the shaft firmly fisting Jensen’s pulsing thickness, moving his hand up and down excruciatingly slowly.

“So,” his honeyed voice lowers an octave watching Jensen dissolving into a breathy mess, “how does he want me?”

Jensen opens his mouth to answer when a phone rings. Glaring over his shoulder, “not mine,” he growls. Still stroking him Jared stretches for his, “it’s the clinic..hello? Dr. Rodgers, hey, how are you sir?” He lets go sitting up against the headboard.

Why’s the doctor calling them at such an odd time, on a holiday no less?

Jared's brow wrinkles before he turns to Jensen, eyes sparkling breaks out his wondrous smile making his dimples pop.

“Jensen, she’s pregnant!”

Jared's practically bouncing on their bed like he’s on a massive sugar high discussing what comes next with the doctor. Jensen feels his erection rapidly diminishing, gets up heading into the bath and turns on the shower.

Climbing in he crosses his arms against the far wall, resting his forehead against them closing his eyes as hot water bounces across his broad shoulders.

Jensen knows he should be elated. Jared’s getting the pup (or pups) he’s desired for years and the possibility of being a father himself again. Instead, his heart seized up in conflict.

***

After that god awful argument in October he ended up at Josh’s, who confessed his mate and him were seeing a counselor because they were having marital issues too. Spending the night drinking and reflecting Jensen came home the next morning to a still angry Jared cause he didn’t know where the fuck his husband was all night.

Filling him in about his talk with Josh, Jared seemed somewhat mollified but a few nights later...

Walker star Jared Padalecki arrested near the one year anniversary of Stereotype bar altercation.

· Jared Padalecki was arrested once again in Austin, Texas, early Sunday morning on one count of public intoxication…

When he got released Jared sat Jensen down pleading with him to sit in on his next therapy session, saying they couldn’t keep going on like this, it was tearing him apart.

He wants..no..needs Jensen to completely open up, stop trying to protect him and discuss what’s going on in his head, what he’s really feeling.

Jared’s therapist started off informing both of them he wasn’t a marriage counselor but after a brief conversation with Jared knew the situation was having a detrimental impact on his mental health.

He listened to them separately, then together, about their observations and thoughts on each other’s behaviors came up with a hypothesis:

Since Jared’s last depressive episode, his random thoughts/emotions were feeding more into Jensen’s deep seated insecurities over his mate’s open, flirtatious personality and how he perceives others attraction/interactions to him.

And now Jared’s inner wolf is demonstrating an intense attraction to an Omega, something never encountered before with past preferences in Beta females, with this new dynamic Jensen didn’t know how to handle it.

Jensen opened and closed his mouth several times sputtering before saying this was complete bullshit and stormed out.

***

Lost in thought Jensen didn’t notice his husband stepping into the open shower stall until his considerable frame was blocking the water, Jared’s voice drew him out of his musings.

“I can hear you thinking clear in the other room.”

Cupped Jensen’s face between his large hands he gazed into those spring colored eyes that captured his heart the moment he looked into them years ago, “Hey, no matter what happens next, we’re good.”

***

December 16th

Jared was sitting in his chair chatting with Lindsey and Keegan while the crew was finishing setting up for the next scene when his phone rang. He didn’t recognize the number but excuses himself, stepping away for some privacy answering.

“Hey, everything okay?” Lindsay asked after he hung up, concerned by the visible tension rolling off the big Alpha.

“Umm..I don’t know, I need to make another call...” Jared said, waving the phone, “yeah, let us know if you need anything.” Keegan says and Jared nodded his thanks.

The phone rang three times, “Hey Clif, I need a favor.”

***

December 19th

Clif pulled the SUV into the parking lot, “Are you sure this is the right place?” Jared inquires looking around taking in the old motel located in a very questionable area of Austin.

“This is the name the guy mentioned.” Clif replied, getting out heading for the office. Couple minutes later he climbed back in, “the manager said the laundry out back.” He started the vehicle and drove to the rear of the property.

Clif got out again and knocked on the building's door. An older Hispanic woman answered engaging him in a brief conversation before stepping back inside.

Clif nodded to Jared and as he got out of the vehicle that piquant scent hit him seconds before the door reopened. The person he’d spent days searching for froze in the doorway upon seeing him.

***

December 22nd

Jensen, claiming out of the Uber, grabbed his bag thanking the driver, walked up the front stone pathway relieved to be home from L. A. after a hopefully final costume fitting for his new role as Soldier Boy, this flying back and forth every week for the last couple months had gotten old real quick and he was looking forward to enjoying the holidays at home.

Jared’s parents were coming tomorrow and staying for a few days as was Danneel and their pups. Josh said he was still planning on dropping by a few hours Christmas Day since he and Mac were scheduled to spend most of the holiday with their parents.

Jensen felt that mixture of anger and sadness he got thinking about his parents. He was raised in their church and though he never believed in it, respected their choice.

Too bad they couldn’t reciprocate.

***

Alan and Donna belonged to an ultra conservative church. The foundations of child rearing was to be found in the good book and in the Ackles household-spare the rod, spoil the child-was gospel.

When they were growing up neither parent was the physically or emotionally demonstrative type, only showing their offspring a reserved affection, especially in public.

The saving grace was their Beta nanny who gave them unconditional love, especially Jensen, who was shy as a child already knowing he was different from his siblings. She instilled the confidence in them to discover who they truly were inside and encouraged Jensen to come out before moving to California.

Shortly after graduating he told his family about his bisexuality and his boyfriend was moving to L.A. with him.

Alan and Donna tried to stop him. He was to go to their pastor and confess his transgressions, beg forgiveness for his sins against the church and its teachings, threatening to pull the agreed upon six month financial support while he auditioned for parts before going to college if it didn’t work out.

Jensen refused, packed up, took his boyfriend and left. He got his first break shortly after and quickly learned Hollywood didn’t care what his sexual orientation was as long as he kept it behind closed doors.

His management agency decided early on to promote Jensen as the good guy/boyfriend type. They also set him up on dates to events with many up and coming female artists of the time. He had no problem playing along when he wasn’t actually dating a woman.

His big break came on the CW. After co-starring in a couple series for the network he was offered the chance to be a lead in a new series created by Eric Kripke.

At the audition he met former Gilmore Girls heartthrob, Jared Padalecki, flashing his infectious smile, dimples for days and the most beautiful, incredible color shifting eyes Jensen’s ever seen, he was done for.

Jensen might not have his biological parents in his life anymore but his now in-laws, the complete opposite of the Ackles, helped fill that hole.

It’s easy to see where Jared’s personality comes from. His Om, Sherrie, is overly affectionate, excessively physical and verbal with everyone she considers family, biological or not.

The first time he accompanied Jared home on a holiday break Jensen was literally bowled over by the five foot nothing Omega and instantly became part of her brood.

***

Barley getting the front door open Jensen is hit with the piquant scent of orange blossoms and spices he couldn’t quite place.

Dropping his carry-on bag in the foyer he followed the scent further into the house. Arlo sat up near the large picture windows facing the backyard where he and Koda are napping and gets up coming over to greet him.

“Hey big guy, where’s daddy at?” Jensen asked rubbing around his ears like he liked having thought Jared would still be on set before the holiday break.

He heads towards the kitchen where the scent seems to be coming from, “Babe is that coffee shop back open, what’s it called, has those sweet rolls you're obsessed with..” he abruptly stopped and blinks not believing what was in front of him.

More accurately who was in front of him.

“Babe is in his office and dinner will be ready in twenty.”

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?”

***

tbc

GFA: @babypink224221 @waywardjoy​ @let-me-luve-you​ @all-4-wincest

SPN: @donnaintx​ @lyarr24

Sam/Jared @idreamofplaid​

Dean/Jensen: @flamencodiva​