#❪ answered ❫ ⤿ someone knows their unilaterals.

[nightmare-of-homophobes]

You Know You're My Favourite - Avis Amberg X gp!reader

Words: 5,4k (more or less).

Summary: Avis searches for her favourite girl after a fight.

Warnings: porn without plot; NSFW; sub!Avis, Dom!reader; oral (both receiving); penetration (Avis receiving); swearing; use of titles; weird/unconventional power play; light praise kink; breeding kink; mommy kink; rough sex; flirts a lot with BDSM; tits play; implied previous conversations of boundaries; implied internal homophobia; implied unilateral love.

Tag list (those who commented or reblogged on the tag post): @alittlewitchyone @emilynissangtr @greek-freak101 @live-laugh-love-lupone @multixfan @thoroughly--confused @likealayka @thegoddamnfeels @kenzie-floops @amethyst-bitch @acciosoftbroom @missquints @mrsines

Special thanks to the lovely @live-laugh-love-lupone who kindly beta read this for me <3

English isn't my native language, so bare me! I didn't watch more than three episodes of Hollywood and hadn't written gp for a while, so I'm sorry if Avis is too out of character and if the sex is awkward 🥲. This story is based on an ask I received some time ago (I hope this finds you, anon!). I wanted to try something different by mixing the request - sub!Avis - with what I took from the character and from the fanfics I’ve read about her - the power play and titles.

Hope you enjoy it! Xoxo!

(Also, I wrote a good part of this while listening to “Red Wine Supernova” and “Good Luck, Babe!”, kind of mixing the songs to set the vibes to the characters.)

***

It was late and your shift was almost ending. It had been a boring day with no clients for you so you got pretty occupied with pumping gas and cleaning cars all afternoon. 

You were just about to go to the bathroom to change yourself out of your uniform when you heard a car approaching. You got irritated by that, but that slipped off your mind as soon as you recognized the car.

Putting on your best smile, you approached it.

– What a lovely surprise… – you said leaning into the window to look at the ginger woman. You didn't miss how she seemed distressed. – How can I help you, Mrs. Amberg?

– You're taking me to Dreamland.. – she demanded, her tone letting you know she wasn't in the mood for your playfulness.

You nodded quietly.

– I just need to let Ernie know you're taking me out. – you said and went back into the gas stations to do it, returning as quick as you could and entering the car.

She drove off the station in silence, the only sounds between you being the roar of the motor and the background sounds that driving through Hollywood involved. You could practically feel the tension irradiating from her body, so you put a hand on her thigh, slowly drawing patterns close to her knee - not wanting to drive her attention to you at all, but to calm her down a little. It seemed to work since she relaxed a bit.

– Tough day, mama? – you dared to break the silence.

– I don't want to talk about it. – she said, leaving no room for other attempts. 

– What do you want to talk about, then? 

She sighed loudly and you felt bad for pushing her, but she answered anyway:

– What about your career? Have you got any offers lately?

You hummed in confirmation. For some reason, Avis always liked to learn about her lovers and she loved to discover how you wanted to be a professional photographer. You deep down wished she would, one day, pose to you.

– Yeah, I'm covering an event this weekend. – you told her excitedly.

– That's great, what is it? – you told her the name of the event, but it wasn't one from her social circle so she didn't know it. – … But I know you'll do amazing, baby, you always do.

She met your eyes for the first time in the night, a small proud smile on her lips. That made your chest warm. It was good to know you had someone to make proud.

– You're just saying it because you know I'm a sucker for being told I'm doing a good job. – you accused her, earning a chuckle from her.

– You caught me. 

You fell into a very much lighter silence as she drove into the night. You weren't recognising the route she was taking, so you imagined it was somewhere she hadn't taken you yet. When she parked in front of an expensive looking hotel, you were sure you hadn't been there before. Not that she didn't take you to fine places, she did, but that was… Too much, in your opinion.

The parking valets opened the doors of the car for you both and you jumped out of it, feeling a little bit conscious of your clothes. Maybe you should've made Avis wait for you to change it when you were still in the gas station but now it was too late to regret.

Letting the ginger woman lead the way inside the hotel and into an elevator, you were able to relax again when the doors closed and you started to go up to your floor. But your relaxed state didn’t last too long since Avis was needier that night.

Being pressed against one of the walls of the elevator, your lips crashed against her red painted ones, her mouth as demanding as she always liked to portray herself. The kiss was messy and harsh, mirroring Avis mood and making you know exactly how she needed to be treated that night.

Holding onto her waist, you pulled her body flushed against yours, your tongue darting out to try its way into her mouth. As soon as she let it slip past her lips, you started to slowly dismantle her demanding attitude. Avis usually liked to have control over everything happening in her encounters, needing to guide what and how things would go. She tried to do it with you in your first encounters, but she was quick to discover that when it came to you, you simply wouldn't bend over anyone’s power without fighting for it - and that she honestly enjoyed having someone to tell her what to do sometimes.

You could still taste the wine on her tongue, which was another clear sign that something distressful happened and she really needed you to make her forget whatever it was that upset her. You could already piece together what probably happened: one more fight with the powerful Mr. Amberg. You didn't even know the man or had a hint of how he looked, but you despised him the same way. How could a man be married to a woman like Avis and not try to satisfy her?

The elevator’s door rang while opening and you quickly disentangled ourselves. She laughed at you.

– It's fine, doll. I made sure to rent a room on a floor that was empty. – she said, already leaving the elevator.

You laughed at yourself and followed her down the corridor. Your eyes didn't resist falling to her ass, admiring how rounded it was as you watched how her hips swayed as she walked. You couldn't wait to put your hands on it.

As she unlocked the door and pulled you inside the room, you met her halfway, crashing your lips together again as you closed the door with your foot before slamming her against it.

– Hmm, did you miss me that much? – she asked, putting her arms around your neck.

You hid your face on her neck, kissing and sucking it softly.

– No… I'm actually had been very busy fucking some pussies around. – you teased her, knowing how she could get jealous when at your work.

It worked because you heard how she grumply groaned and turned her face to the other side when you tried to kiss her on the cheek.

– Oh, mama, you let me get into your head so easily. – you poked her side. – You know you're my favourite client.

Though you meant those words, they left you with a bitter taste on the tongue. You had a strict rule of trying to not get attached to your regular clients, but sometimes you would get yourself wondering how it would be to be something else than just a prostitute to Avis. Something more.

But of course you would never speak those desires out loud. No. She was married and you were both women. And, in the end, she only saw you as a passing fun. Someone she could get distracted with when her true life got tough.

– You're distracted today… – she called your attention, making you snap out of your thoughts. She frowned. – What's in your head?

You let a peck on her lips, diverting her attention.

– Nothing at all. – you brushed off the topic. Letting your hands fall to her butt, you gave it a playful squeeze. – Now… What about going to prepare yourself for me? – you asked against her lips before leaning to her ear again. – I'm so hungry, mama…

You heard how her breath hitched and felt how her hands buried themselves into your hair. Leaning back to look at her, you saw how her eyes had darkened. You always loved to watch her eyes. Especially when she was under you trying so hard to keep them open while cumming around your cock.

Leaving your embrace, Avis went to the double doors in one of the walls of the living room (that you only noticed once she approached because you were too busy paying attention to her before), opened it and disappeared inside of it. The bed was probably inside those doors. You heard another one being opened before the shower was turned on.

She always liked to dress up on encounters like that, but she liked to be extra clean and use her fanciest gowns and lingerie for you. She was sold for compliments and you suspected that was a thing for her.

Trying to busy yourself, you poured down two drinks, swallowing yours in one go.

You hadn't to wait too long before you heard heels clicking on the floor and arms flew around you to embrace your body tightly.

– Do you want a drink? – you asked softly, enjoying how she cupped your breasts and kissed the back of your neck.

– Right now I just want to drink whatever comes out of you. – she answered, sending shivers down your spine.

– I can arrange that. – turning on her arms, you started to undo your belt, feeling how she was getting impatient. 

Drinking the shot of whiskey you had poured for her, you swallowed a little before bringing your lips closer to hers. She quickly accepted it, opening her mouth so you could spill the drink into it. Of course that wasn't what she meant, but she wouldn't deny you.

Kissing down her cheek and her jaw, you buried your face back on her neck, your hands found the knot of her robe to untie it. She was smelling so good you wanted to wrap yourself around her and never leave.

– I like this colour on you… – you muttered against her skin, hearing her whimper softly. – But unfortunately I need this off.

Letting it slide off her shoulders, it was your turn to lose your breath.

– Did you like it, baby? – she asked with a sultry smile and tone, faking innocence. She knew you liked it. Actually, she could feel just how much you liked it.

There, standing confidently in front of you, she was wearing a red corset that hugged her curves perfectly, but that wasn’t all. Your eyes ranked up her legs, admiring the black long socks attached to something underneath the corset - probably a, also black, garter belt. Finally, your eyes met what you considered to be the cherry on top: lace black panties that left so little for your imagination.

You ran your fingers over the details of the corset, your mind already picturing how it would be to take it out of her later. The rest would stay in place, it wouldn’t bother you.

– I loved it. – you said, playing with her garters. – And because of it I’ll let you pick what we’re doing first. What do you want baby to do? – you asked, pulling her hips closer so one of your knees was placed between her legs.

Under your intent gaze, Avis squirmed. She enjoyed your attention so much. Starting to undo the buttons of your white shirt, she asked:

– You mentioned being hungry, right? 

You laughed and helped her to get yourself undressed. Once you got rid of your shirt, tie and shorts, your hands returned to her hips, starting to push her in the direction of the couch, you made her sit down. She made mention of untying the garters but you pulled her hands off it harshly.

– None of it, I didn't ask you to take it off. – you reprimanded her while kneeling on the floor.

– I don't need your permission… – she said under her breath and lifted her hips towards you.

One of your eyebrows shot up as you looked at her. So she was naughty tonight? How bad.

– Are you looking to be punished, mama? – you asked severely. – You know how long I can keep you on edge.

She seemed to fight her pride and own words before looking away and muttering:

– I'm sorry.

– That's better. – you tapped the side of her thigh, satisfied. – Now where were we…

You spread her legs, starting to kiss the insides of her legs and massaging her feet while doing it. She loved receiving a good massage. 

– Yes… – she sighed, opening her legs even more, if it was possible.

Her skin was smelling so sweet and her socks brushing against your bare skin were so soft that you were feeling yourself getting hard faster than usual. Avis would certainly drive you mad anyday.

– Baby, please… – she whined, her hips bucking in the air, asking to be touched. – Please, Mama's so hot…

Complying with her requests, you brought your lips higher, your fingers cleverly finding her panties and pushing them to the side. You licked from her entrance to her clit, feeling how she clenched and how the foot you were still holding curled into your hand.

Bringing your hands to her hips, you pulled her further to the edge of the couch, placing her legs over your shoulders.

– Look at this, mama.  – you breathed against her core, letting soft kisses all over her mound and playfully sucking at her bundle of nerves, feeling her squirm and moan shakily. – Your pink hole is so wet for me already, I bet I could slip inside right now without any trouble… – you fully slid your index finger into her fluffy folds as if to prove your point to her. – See?

– God… – she groaned and you could feel how her hands were clutching at the couch on your sides. She could feel your finger searching for her weak spot, scratching her walls sweetly in its path.

You were steadily letting kitten licks on her clit, your finger caressing her point over and over again, reducing her to a pathetic moaning mess. When you started to suck her, her hands flew to your head, holding you impossibly closer.

– Fuck! Yes! – she rolled her hips against your mouth, starting to ride your face in chase of her orgasm.

You let her do it while adding another finger inside her, scissoring and opening her so you could replace it with your tongue later. 

– Hmm… Mama, you’re taking me so well. – you complimented her, your voice sending vibrations against her clit, making her grind harder against you. 

Her moans were louder with each thrust of your fingers, every rub of her clit against your tongue making her legs twitch and her hole clench around your fingers. You knew she was so close and you were loving it. Satisfied with the stretching, you finally slipped your tongue inside her, tasting her flavor straight from the source. 

Her grip on your hair tightened, her thighs creating a fluffy - and strong - cage as they closed around your head. A loud, obscene moan left her lips, her whole body losing control as she reached her orgasm.

– Ah, baby! Fuck! Fuck! – she cried out.

Her walls were tightening so hard around your tongue it was practically expelling you from inside her and you couldn’t help but whimper at that. Staying still, you let her use your mouth to ride her orgasm.

You caressed her thighs all the while, soothing her and waiting for her to calm down. It didn’t take her long before you could finally free yourself from her legs, resting your head on her thigh as you had done before. You looked up at her with what you knew were your loving eyes.

– Everything alright, mama? – you asked as she panted, her chest rising and falling heavily. 

All you received from her was a soft groan, her eyes shut tightly. Getting up from the floor, you sat on her lap, drawing her attention back to you. 

– I’m fine. – she said dreamingly, opening her eyes to meet yours. 

– That’s good… – you said and leaned to kiss her.

She welcomed your mouth with her tongue, more than willing to taste herself on yours, moaning at it.

– Can you taste how sweet you are, mama? – you mumbled against her lips, making sure to press your tongue down at hers, wanting her to commit her own taste to her memory.

The kiss was heated and messy and you didn’t even notice when you started to roll your hips on hers, brushing your covered erection against her corset, missing the feeling of her chubby belly. You liked the corset, it was pretty, but you liked even more to have her breasts and tummy on display.

– Stand up, let me take this thing from you. – you panted against her lips, getting off her lap to sit beside her.

She did it and you pulled her down on your lap, moaning at the feeling of her ass hugging your dick perfectly. She rubbed her ass over you playfully, earning a quick slap on her right buttcheek, which made her quiet down.

Starting to open her corset, you took the opportunity to also undo her complex updo. She usually didn’t let you do it, since it took time to put her hair back in place, but you didn’t think she was planning going anywhere or returning home that night. As you finished with the corset and brushed her hair with your fingers, admiring its redness, you made no effort to resist reaching around her body and taking her big boobies into your hands, loving their weight and softness. The sigh she let out told you how relieved she was to get rid of the corset.

– Feeling better, Mama? – you asked while playing with her breasts, squeezing them and rubbing her nipples to get them hard.

She only hummed in answer, her ass not staying still on your lap, teasing you as much as you were teasing her. You kissed your way to the back of her neck, biting down hard on the skin there, making her squirm and whimper above you, her hands reaching up to hold yours in place. You pinched her nipples and flicked it on your fingers, making her breath get elaborated again.

– Baby, please! – she finally gave up, understanding you wouldn’t take any action if she didn’t beg. – Please, I need you… – she tried to push one of your hands down to her pussy but you prevented her from doing so. – Please, I need you inside me so fucking bad!

Reaching to her neck instead of between her legs, you held it and squeezed it weakly, pulling her towards you until her head was on your shoulder.

– You know what to do if you need my cock that much. – you said against her ear, enjoying how her desperate eyes found yours. Such beautiful eyes.

You smirk down at her and bite her ear softly.

Sliding down from your lap, she got on her knees before you, her hands fumbling with your tight underwear while letting mouth-opened kisses on your erection through the cloth. She looked so sexy doing that.

– Aren’t you forgetting anything, mama? – you asked and she looked up at you confused. You gestured for her to keep eye contact and she nodded.

Letting her take control of that small moment, you leaned back on the couch helping her to take off your underwear by raising your hips. She bit her lips at the sight of your cock on display.

– See how excited I get everytime you come to see me, mama? – you asked, running a finger on her lower lip before slipping it inside her mouth, watching how she accepted it, sucking it into her mouth.

Bringing her closer by her chin, you let her replace your fingers with your cock, sighing heavily at the velvety and warm sensation of her mouth around you.

– That's it, mama… – you hold her head, not leading her, just letting it rest there. – Take it all inside.

She obeyed, bit by bit taking all your length into her mouth, not having any trouble. The idea of her being so used to doing that kind of turned you on. Between the two of you, you might have been the prostitute, but she was definitely the slut.

You moaned as she bobbed her head up and down a few times before returning to your head, sliding her tongue against your slit.

– Fuck, mama... – you bite your lower lip, your free hand going to your tits to play with them. – You know exactly what to do to make me lose control.

You groaned when she sucked the head, her cheeks hollowing as she did and her eyes searching your reactions through heavy lids and battling of lashes. That woman would certainly kill you one day.

Letting her work her magic on your cock, you took that moment to just enjoy the pleasure she was giving you, focusing on your sensations as soft groans and moans kept falling from your lips, your chest heavy and heart racing as you watched how she switched between sucking your cock and teasing the slit at the tip or sucking your balls while jerking you, all the while never breaking eye contact.

– You're doing so fucking good… – you panted as your release started building, your dick throbbing into her mouth. You almost came when, in one go, she put all your length deep inside her mouth, the tip reaching the back of her throat. – Fuck!

You held her head in place, closing your eyes at the intensity of the wave of pleasure that teased you, unaware of how she also closed her eyes, moaning around you and sending another wave through you. She always found it so hot when you were rough with her and she could feel her arousal sliding down her thighs, her pussy aching to be filled again as she made her best to not gag around you. You released your grip on her.

– Keep going, I'm so close. – you gasped.

With that, she doubled her efforts, your hips bucking to meet her meet her mouth halfway, your cock brushing the back of her throat at every damn thrust. A strain of swears were falling from your lips and, when you finally couldn't help it anymore, your hand hooked into her hair and you harshly set the rhythm you wanted, making her choke sometimes while supporting herself on your thighs, trying to relax her jaw the most as she let you fuck her mouth. She knew her throat would be on fire the next day but she didn't care. She would never stop you from doing what you wanted to her. 

She was exactly where she wanted, receiving exactly what she needed.

With a final rough thrust up, you held her still, cock buried impossibly deep inside her as she fought the urge to push you off her so she could breathe. When she couldn't take it anymore, she patted your thighs and you let her go while growling through your orgasm, your seed spilling from her throat to her face since she couldn't hold your dick down her throat for so long. 

Both of you were breathing heavily for totally different reasons.

– Sorry. – you apologized as soon as you got enough air to do it.

Her head was resting on your hip, her hair in all directions. Her face was flushed and painted with your cum while her lips were swollen and her cheeks had stains of tears. She was a fucking mess.

– It's okay, doll… – she muttered raspy, her chest rising and falling in quick puffs as she still was trying to calm herself down. – You know I like it.

Gentler than you were before, you ran your hand through her hair, putting it a bit back in place, not because you were finished with her, but because you wanted to bring her some tenderness after such roughness. You waited until she was ready to keep going.

Watching her standing up, you stood too, catching her lips into your in a soft, caring kiss.

– You know we can stop at any moment, right? – you reminded her in a whisper.

– I want to continue. – she reassured you. You nodded.

Taking her by the hand, you led her to those double doors, entering it to find your way to the bed. It was very large and fit the luxury of the place.

– Get on the bed. I'm gonna get another drink. – you said while caressing her back.

As she moved to do so, you returned to the other room, pouring you a drink while you still felt cloudy from your previous orgasm. Something strong like whisky would definitely help, you thought to yourself. Yet, it wasn't the whisky at all that snapped you from your current state of mind, but the vision of your tie lying in a corner of the room. An idea popping into your head.

Drinking the liquid in one go, you walked over and picked up the tie, returning to Avis immediately.

You weren't waiting to find her on her fours on the bed, waiting for you with her ass high in the air and face buried in the sheets. All the while she was touching herself, two fingers deep inside her drenched pussy.

That pissed you off.

– I didn't say you could touch yourself! – you exclaimed as you reached over and pulled her fingers out of her harshly. –You’re really looking for that punishment, lady!

You turned her over so you could pin her down, you face hovering over hers as you angrily asked:

–Now choose… – you lifted the tie. – Hands or eyes?

She didn't miss a beat before answering:

– Eyes. – she could bear not being able to see, but being restrained was a torture for her.

You grimaced at her answer, an unsatisfied expression on your face. 

– You don't deserve it. – you said. – Mama has been acting very bad.

You flipped her over again, using your weight to hold her still as she fought you and your decision to tie her hands instead. As you finished, you leaned and growled on her ear: 

– You will learn how to please your baby!

Getting off her, you helped her to return to her previous position: ass on the air and face buried in the sheets. Aligning your dick with her entrance, you entered at once, knowing that she was more than prepared after so much teasing. She moaned unashamed at that, ass moving to meet your hips halfway.

– Yesss… – the word lingered on her tongue, turning into a hissing as you slapped her ass once more.

Settling a steady rhythm of thrusts, you watched, hypnotized, how her pussy took your cock so well, as it was designed especially for you. A soft and warm place for your dick to rest and empty itself.

Oh, that was another great idea. You would adore to cum inside Avis again and again until she was filled and carrying your seed deep inside her.

Keeping to fuck her in that slow and steady rhythm, you knew exactly what you were doing to her: making her lose her mind again. It wouldn't take long until she was pathetically begging again, her brain melting from having what she wanted from the start but it not being enough to satisfy her.

And you were right, it didn't take long.

Once she realised you had no intention in changing your pace, she cried out muffled:

– Baby, please… – she tried to fuck herself against you, but reaceived another harsh slap. – Mama is so sorry, please… She won't do that again… Please, please, please… Mama will do anything baby wants her to do, promise… – her whimpers keep going, but you already have heard the words you wanted to hear so you leaned into her again, one hand getting tangled in her hair again.

– Anything, mama? – you asked and, to provoke her, you gave a particularly rough thrust. Just the way she liked.

– Yes! Fuck, yes, please… – she cried.

Your free hand winding its way through her body until it finds her clit, rubbing it in tight circles, enjoying how she gasped and moaned even louder.

– Do you know what I would love, mama? – you kept whispering against her ear. – To have you carrying my babies… – a soft “yes” came as an answer and you closed your eyes. – Wouldn't it be lovely, mama? Me buried deep inside you? Feeling you so good? Spilling all my seed so mama could take it in her perfect body for me? It would make me so happy, mama… 

Hearing her confirm every question you made her was an otherworldly experience, but the words that set you wild were those who came from her lips in sequence of that:

– Please, love, give me your babies… I'll carry your babies, please…

Pushing her face against the mattress harder and holding onto her tied hands, you started slamming into her, the sounds of your skins meeting each other extremely obscene. You were panting and whimpering, lost in Avis body as you finally gave her what she was so pleased to beg for, her moans fully turning into screams of pleasure now, her hands twitching and trying desperately to free themselves from the tie while her toes curled and she bit the sheets to muffle her sounds.

Every thrust of yours sent her higher on her from the force you were using to fuck her, almost as if trying to forge your bodies together, so it was a good thing you were keeping a good hold on her, otherwise her head would be banging against the headboard.

When she started clenching painfully around your cock, you knew she was close to her orgasm. You were too. Flipping your positions, you laid on bed and pulled her above you, untying her hands so she could support herself to ride you. 

– Yes! Yes! Gimme your babies, yes! – she kept exclaiming as she bounced hard up and down the entirety of your length, seeming to want as bad as you to bury your cock deep inside her. – Fuck, yes, mama feels so good! Mama is gonna cum!

You helped her to bounce, supporting her hips and meeting them with yours halfway as well, wanting to make her cum again. 

Sitting down on the bed, you held her hips down, burying yourself inside her while helping her to grind on you, one of your hands searching for her clit to send her over the edge. You were feeling goosebumps all over your body and it was becoming harder to fight your orgasm.

– Cum for me, mama, please. – you asked and, lowering your head to her chest, you caught one of her lips into your feverish mouth, sucking it hungrily.

That was enough and, with her orgasm finally washing over her, she stopped her movements, her entire body tensing up.  Being squeezed like that, you didn't even try to resist your own orgasm, spilling yourself inside her body as a guttural moan escaped from the back of your throat.

Both of you stayed still, practically breathing each other's air as you panted with your foreheads pressed together. For a long moment, none of you dared to move, both sensible to touch and still feeling the aftershocks of your blissful orgasms. Finally, you turned her again on the bed and slipped out of her, both of you moaning from the loss of the sensation.

You watched how your seed spilled out of her mistreated hole once you were out. You weren't preoccupied with coming inside her. She was past her fertile age and you were infertile, so there was no risk at all.

Laying beside her, you welcomed her into your arms.

– Feeling better? – asked softly, running your fingers through her hair and kissing the top of her head, your eyes were feeling so heavy.

– Much better. – she said and yawned.

– Go to sleep. – you told her, knowing that all would end very soon.

Soon she would have to return to her husband and you to your clients. Soon she would pretend that all those nights with you were nothing more than usual fun, even though both of you know she had stopped seeking other prostitutes after finding you. Stopped seeking men.

And you, well, soon you would have to pretend that you didn't let her affect you. That you didn't let yourself hope that, one day, she would need more than just sex. And, certainly, that you didn't caught yourself thinking of her when fucking others or wishing she would accept what the nature of your encounters were saying about her.

– Good night, doll. – she said sleepily.

– Good night, Avis. – you answered, kissing her head once again.

You knew she would have already left you when you woke up the next morning.

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Masterlist

[g1rlken]

hi dolly! 💕i just discovered ur blog n i love ur writing sooo much! 🙈💞 can u pls do 2 or 16 for nate!! 💗💗

you’re so freaking nice woah I love u sm 😠🫶🏼

Prompt: 2. Sunshine x grumpy + 16. Help get out of a toxic relationship

Nate Jacobs x fem!reader

2.7k words

-

Just the ninth if not the tenth party of the month. Another house party, on a school night, way past her usual bedtime and really overwhelming that it just won’t near its end. Y/n couldn’t bare it sometimes but she had to attended because her boyfriend Ryan did. It was fun though, driving him home as he’d be piss drunk and the party itself had the most obnoxious teenage charm. In order to block out on the godawful bass and flickering lights y/n guided herself into the kitchen when Ryan most probably didn’t even notice.

“Oh what have we here!” Nate exclaimed as he followed in some time after, she jumped down from the kitchen counter where she previously sat with an awkward smile. She’d known of Nate and him partially. They were supposed friends ever since that one term last year where she had to tutor him. Though they didn’t really reconnect after that once she started seeing Ryan. It was somewhat majorly due to him that y/n didn’t see a lot of her friends who seemed potential threats to him.

“Hi” she greeted him awkwardly looking out the door to see if Ryan was coming, she was scared he’d cause a scene if he saw her with Nate. Even if it was just a conversation, two of them at a reasonable distance with a probable small talk following. Ryan wouldn’t have it, he’d loose his shit over her even breathing in the direction of some other guy.

Nate could tell that she was a bit frantic over something and he was fast to connect it was a ‘someone’ rather. “What are you doing here all alone?” He asked pouring himself a glass of water.

“Nothing really just uh-“ she tried thinking of proper words to say. But the soft dread of Ryan walking in any minute made her mind preoccupied.

Nate interrupted her pause, “Beer pong’s too boring for you? Already calculated the probability of winning?” He joked, when she had helped him with math and there were similar questions as such counting probably of winning a coin toss. So it was a small jab from something between them.

A small laugh seemed to escape her genuinely as he correlated their previous connection through maths, “I didn’t think about that wow…” she trailed off, “one throw amongst ten glasses”

“One in ten probability of winning.” He answered his instant calculation.

“I don’t know the glasses are set up like a triangle and they’re not all equally probable to get in, maybe we take like one row at a time and then apply bayes theorem for each-“ she was going off about the self curated math problem between the two of them as he listened intently but looked absolutely clueless so she stopped herself “oh wait I’m rambling aren’t I? Sorry” she cringed to herself letting out a soft chuckle.

“It’s alright sweetheart” he added with a shrug, “I like hearing you talk.”

“Surely because math is so fun isn’t it?” She said sarcastically rolling her eyes at him.

“It’s not. But when you talk like that, it’s fun to watch.” Nate replied just mildly, contrary to his chance making intentions out of this conversation. Even apart from that he did mean that, he’d missed it, her.

“Like what?”

“That…” he pointed to her face vaguely, unable to describe how her eyes lit up and a cheery tone followed her voice whenever she talked about something she liked without being made felt like it was a chore to the listener “You get all smiley...happy. When you talk about something you love”

“Well I don’t necessarily love math.” She told him, it was true. Despite of being good at something, having a passion for it was unilateral to it.

“I guess you love being heard then.” It might just have been a note as Nate mentioned it so casually but as she thought about it, she couldn’t help but wander back to Ryan and how he never listened.

No. That couldn’t be, everyone’s a different lover perhaps “Yeah…” she trailed off with a small smile as her expression fell. Comprehending those moments where talking to Ryan about something in her life would just feel like talking to a wall.

“What’s wrong?” Nate asked catching on her fallen expression.

“What?” She asked confused, nonchalant because surely he wouldn’t fix anything “Nothing…”

“It doesn’t seem like nothing, what’s wrong?”

“What?” She frowned but couldn’t help laugh when she saw his ever so concerned face like her smile falling was that big of a deal. “Nothing’s wrong!” As a joke, she splashed some of the tap water on his flickering it on him through her fingers. She laughed as he took the attack of tiny droplets.

“You did not just-“ if it were some one else he would’ve most probably said the worst cusses in the book but with her he just let out a small huff.

“Did what?” She attempted to sprinkle his face once again but this time he got a hold of her wrists with one of his hands, she couldn’t contain her laughter. It was infectious to him as well, this light hearted moment was flooded all over like a forest fire with an irking voice.

“What the fuck’s going on here?” Ryan seethed, y/n immediately pulled her hands away from Nate’s as that boy strided in.

“W-we uh were just talking” y/n spoke frantically, it was disheartening to Nate to see her all panicky and frantic again, when she was just laughing and at peace a few moments ago.

“That’s what you’ve come up with?” Ryan questioned as he aggressively walked towards her “Why do you always have to slut your way about, everywhere I take you huh?”

“I wasn’t doing anything I swear-we were just talking, I used to tutor him math and we were just reconnecting over it I-“ y/n jumped rapidly to explain herself before Nate could intervene for her.

“Over math huh?” Ryan scoffed “Someone dumb like you? You were talking about math?”

“Hey calm the fuck down alright” Nate interjected before y/n could. “She said we were just talking so we were just talking.” He added authority to her words but it just made things worse.

“This is our matter so can you fuck off?” Ryan barked at Nate, the two weren’t friends but just distant acquaintances. Ryan naturally couldn’t stand anyone trying to talk to her because it was all ‘flirting’ and Nate couldn’t naturally stand y/n because that boy made his sun rays embodied girl feel awful.

“No.” Nate said adamantly “How about you grow a pair and stop being a little bitch about everyone who looks in her direction? Do you not think yourself man enough to keep her or do you have to berate her to have her around?” Nate was poking at him purposely because he himself wanted a go at this guy but he didn’t want y/n to think Nate was the guy who’d throw first punch, even though he wanted to.

But that was it, Nate received the punch he was asking for but he barely flinched very overpowered with his own urge of showing Ryan his place they two were at each other’s throats. This was the exact scene y/n was worried about Ryan creating, she tried to soothe the fight pleading them both but it didn’t work.

“Get off of him!” She kept on trying as she held Ryan from his arm, trying to tug him away but it was distracting him so much from throwing his hands at Nate. Her constant nagging and tugging.

“Get the fuck off me!” Ryan roared at y/n pushing her off of him very aggressively, intently pushing her so hard she fell to the ground and that was when Nate no longer held his punches. He beat the boy bloody red. By now the others had gathered too to help escalate the situation but it was of no help, Nate was like an animal unleashed.

-

A week since that, y/n couldn’t even meet Nate’s eye. She ignored him in hallways, changing her direction, she sat far across him in class always hurrying out before he could talk. She wouldn’t reply to his messages, not even see them. He hadn’t seen her around with Ryan either in their designated spots around the school so that was a good sign but he just wanted to talk this out with her because he couldn’t understand the relentless feeling of having lost her. Even as a friend. He never regretted having beaten Ryan, he deserved it. Nate was so certain of it. But y/n. He hated thinking she saw him differently after that, his obnoxious rage to protect that he wanted to cherish. Did it repel her? He felt entitled to at least find that out, he’d leave her be to just glance from the sidelines and wait till she’ll finally look his way if that made her happy but he’d like to know.

Another house party after that one with a facade, Nate as he lounged with his friends overheard a group of girls behind him gossiping about how y/n and Ryan are back together. Eavesdropping as his blood boiled he found out that she’ll probably be around here since Ryan’s here. When he heard that he immediately rose to his feet setting down his beer without a care to respond to his mates who asked about his sudden leave, they kept asking where he was going before he was lost in the crowd. He could barely register anything at this point.

As he walked through the crowd in disbelief and anger he finally did find y/n, out in the garden with some other girls he simple pulled her by her arm to himself without a word or explanation to others he received a few woahs he didn’t care for.

Nate would’ve pulled her aside to talk to her if she was standing with Ryan if that boy weren’t to busy getting piss drunk. “Hey!” Y/n resisted trying to walk herself but he continued to drag her with a tight grip on his arm getting to a quieter place by the small space between the backward and out shed. “Nate what are you-“

“What’s wrong with you?” He asked her, brows furrowed.

“What? What are you talking about…” y/n trailed off as some embarrassment and regret creeped within her but she full well knew what he was talking about.

“How are you even seeing Ryan again? Are you out of your mind?!” He exclaimed. He had so much to demand about, Nate swallowed his pride with timid hurt whenever she ignored him. He could bare her dismissiveness but not her sadness.

“Look…” She breathed unable to meet his gaze, “it’s different-“

“It’s different is it? What is tell me, has he come up with more ways to make you feel shitty?”

Remaining silent as she looked to the ground like it was the most interesting thing ever she felt horrible. Even more horrible of the life she could be otherwise leading but the life she was afraid of leaving. Afraid of the change leaving ryan would bring, afraid of its consequence the emotional weight.

“And you’ve been ignoring me this entire time. Do you think I can’t see that?” Nate spoke and this time she looked up increasingly confused at how he could see through her that much “You don’t look at me, always hurry away even right now you can’t even meet my eyes what are you so afraid of?!”

“It’s just…it’s difficult to explain” y/n tried to reply mildly as she sighed on the verge of tears.

“As long as you can explain it to yourself right?” He scoffed, really agitated how she couldn’t see what he could. Nate was an intense lover too, ferocious one that. But he’d never make her feel this miserable if she was his. She wouldn’t even have to be his he just wanted Ryan to leach away from her because she’d be happier exactly like she was before that boy. Constantly governing her and disrespectful. Nate had a bad temper and he was difficult but he’d never be difficult enough to the extent of hurting her.

Now tears brimmed her eyes and he instantly held back from his words realising just how distressing it must be for her “Hey…hey” he urged her raising her chin with his fingers to make him look at him “I shouldn’t have said that I’m sorry…” he apologised but it didn’t stop the tears streaming down her face. “Y/n…it’s alright” he brought her to himself enlacing her into his arms and he rubbed her back letting her cry it out.

“I just don’t know what to do-he—he apologised and he said he’d change and this is the second time this has happened and I-i felt embarrassed to see you because you did so much and yet I went back to him…I keep on doing this, I just, I’m very lost on that account” she wept “He’s my first-first everything and I do really like him but he just makes me miserable and awful. Every second I’m with him I just feel horrible I don’t even want to be here at this party but I am…because of him.”

“Look at me” he said pulling away from the hug to face her but she still kept looking down so Nate cupped her face in his hands “Look” he urged “It’s okay…it’s difficult. You’re learning to love and you’re too attached to him right now. You will get out of it only if you get out of it. You have gotten over much difficult things and you have been okay. You’ll be okay this time around too.”

“How do you know that?” She asked as her voice broke but her tears composed.

“Because I love you.” Nate blurted and didn’t even regret it, almost felt free of letting out a feeling so intense in him whether or not she reciprocated “I love you. I love all of you and I’m not embarrassed to admit it but I want you whole. I want you happy, I promise you i will maintain it and I don’t want you to think of it now” he said wiping her tears “we’re going to go home. I’ll drop you home. You’re not answerable to anyone if you don’t want to be at a place you don’t want to be. You think about Ryan, break up, sort your head out yeah? You deserve better than him because love shouldn’t make you feel awful and miserable. it doesn’t necessarily have to be me or anyone, your own self needs you the most right now. Act right by you.”

Nate drove her home after that, she was truly glad. The car ride was full of a comfortable silence and the genuine serene smile which adorned her face when she told him good night after dropping her off was all worth it to Nate.

Following two days were a bit long as Nate didn’t hear from y/n in any way. She wasn’t even at school. The game day was on the weekend so people rarely came from class these days. Regardless on the game day when he had to play himself he searched for her in the crowd full of people but couldn’t find her. That’s what he told himself weighing light on the fact that she might not have showed up.

He played his well that game, where they won. But he still felt like he had lost somewhat. Since he didn’t have y/n, or a sign of her that could bring his heart some peace. It’s as if his wish was turned alive, he saw y/n come rushing towards the team where everyone was congratulating each other.

He dropped his helmet to the floor when she came running and picked her up in his arms, feeling won, feeling at home. Nate hugged her as if she wouldn’t exist if he let go and likewise. Y/n finally felt liberated, happy, like herself again. Following his word of advise.

Y/n had broken up with Ryan, with a lot of comprehension and conversations with her feelings y/n had reciprocated Nate’s. “I love you too” she replied to what she couldn’t that night at the party and he smiled so hugely kissing her as she was still lifted up into his arms. She kissed him back wrapping her arms around him and like he’d promised, she felt alright again.

HEY!!!! Please let me know your thoughts I will think about it twice a week if you commented a smile face even. Anyways, THANK YOU for reading I love you and go drink water

+is my nate semi non toxic? Yes as a descendant of bob the builder family I fixed him

[rei-ismyname]

Logan tried to murder Chuck. What then?

After the sun set on Krakoa and the dust settled, Charles Xavier surrendered himself to 'human authorities.' He was being transported to his super prison built by Reed Snitchards and Tony Nark when...

Logan came to kill him in a very unsubtle way. Surely those guards died or at minimum suffered serious permanent injuries. What little we get of his motivation is an objection to Chuck's time as Sentinel X - killing a bunch of humans. Logan Behavior, basically. Certainly hypocrisy.

Pretty stylish entrance though, The Shining style. He's just about to gut him after Chuck declines explaining himself or speaking at all. Keep in mind resurrection Protocols just phased into another dimension - Logan is aiming to kill Xavier permanently (comic book permanent obviously) here despite the fact he's going to prison for life. He'd actually be subverting punitive state justice here.

I hardly need to say that this is pretty extreme for Logan. He's killed countless people, but for the last few decades he's worshipped the ground Charles walks on. After AvX, when Chuck committed suicide by Phoenix, Logan appointed himself the custodian of 'the dream' and ran the school (though he renamed it after Jean because he's a creepy and petty man.) Cyclops is often held up as Chuck's heir, but I think Logan is just as much. (Though Jean and Storm beat them both out and surpass him.) Maybe this is a hypocritical broken pedestal moment.

Magneto objects, freezing him in place and proclaiming 'no more martyrs.'

Did you know 9/10 failed murderers say 'cripes?'

Then he yeets him out of the prison and levitates it so he can't get back in. Mags and Chuck have a chat and we see nothing of Logan until Wolverine #1.

These people all need therapy. Emotional intelligence so low.

That murderous unilateral motivation seems to have cooled - 'Charles doin' what he did' is third on his list of things that took their toll. Not to minimise his pain, but everyone else has experienced those things too. Many had it worse. Scott, for example, was tortured for six months with his eyes sewn shut and a broken back (which... healed somehow.) If someone else was doing this he'd call them out at best, more likely he'd tell them to get over it. This is #Logan Behavior, though it's weird he doesn't mention Daken's death.

Brief aside - was he truly needed in the pack? I can't see what use a throng of wolves would have for a naked guy with opposite sleep patterns, very different dietary requirements, and the inability to breed with them. His presence got them killed. He was tolerated at best, more likely an imposition. Kevin Costner motherfucker.

I'm 99% sure this is next chronologically. Scott says Logan was 'in the area so he asked him to investigate' - 'the area' being Santo Marco, a fictional South American country that Magneto briefly conquered in 1963. The X-Men answered his distress call.

No mention of Chuck here, and he greets Scott warmly. No thank you though. They patch him up back at the Factory. Looks like he does have use for X-Men.

Wolverine can absolutely give up. It's his thing.

From 'I never should have left the woods' this has to be after Wolverine #1, but before Uncanny X-Men #1-4, because that takes place over a few days and the phone call between Rogue and Scott implies so. We only get the end of this conversation, but it's very safe to assume it was a soft recruitment offer and assumption of a family relationship. No mention of Chuck here either. He claims he's done, citing Krakoa as a loss. It is a loss, but it also bought back the 16 million Genoshan dead and established a mutant paradise in a heaven dimension - one he could have gone to.

Also, Logan didn't build shit. He had nothing to do with Genosha, in fact he opposed and obstructed it. He bailed on Utopia and the narrative kept genocidal threats away from the school. He had little to do with building Krakoa itself and while he went on the missions he was asked to, he remained a skeptic the entire time. He didn't trust the island and lived on the moon in a polycule. Anyway, he tells Scott not to come looking for him. I promise you he wouldn't say that to Jean.

Sure, stay in the woods, idiot. Get more wolves killed.

She's right, they're not strategists.

Looks like he's fine hanging out with Rogue and Gambit. Rogue seemed fine with joining Cyclops and co, but doesn't argue at all when Logan (who is hours away from leaving and has no intention of staying) shoots it down for... reasons? They were X-Men enough when they rescued him from Santo Marco, ingrate.

Neither should struggle to imagine a community 'run' by Scott Summers. Logan has been living with him for at least 3 years and he wasn't everywhere when Logan and Jean were banging. Rogue was on a Krakoan X-Men team with Scott and he and Jean prepped new leaders and stepped back. They all considered themselves Krakoan and Scott 'lived to serve.' How does it end this way? The Chuck question answers itself, though Logan doesn't say 'I wish Magneto didn't stop me killing him' or something. Scott? Uhhh, you took this misanthrope's grumbling as gospel. Go to Alaska and say hi! Or maybe he'll call you. Kate? Uhm, she just told you. She broke in Fall of X, you know this.

Interestingly, Logan uses the term 'fill Chuck's chair.' I thought he was quitting the parts that don't work? 'Why do you even want to?' should be self explanatory. Rogue receives a phone call after this from Scott, and she says he's 'the last person she wants to speak to.' Maybe Logan is right and he shouldn't be around people. He infected Rogue with Scott haterism very quickly.

The Outliers show up and less than a day later he leaves, heading for the nearest forest. Even the swamp hag that guts him thinks he's a whining bitch. Logan is aware that Rogue's group are planning a prison break, that children are being hunted, though it doesn't stop him leaving.

Put all this together and it paints a very human portrait of a traumatized person pushing everyone away, albeit in the most immature way possible. This is what Magneto referred to when he said Logan Behavior, and he's right. If I was talking about a real life person it'd be unforgivably callous, but I'm not. I wrote this piece to interrogate his continuity from Krakoa to FTA, and I was expecting it to make less sense to be honest. As I said, this is textbook trauma response. It portrays that well, but the whiplash of Logan going from 'murder Chuck no matter the collateral damage' to 'Chuck did bad things but Cyclops is worse - don't be friends with him, Rogue' is severe and unsatisfying.

Uncanny #700 was one of the last things written for Krakoa, so it's likely that information wasn't available for FTA writers. Except Logan and Kate had both sworn they'd kill Chuck with plenty of notice, so I don't think that deserves a pass. Is anyone surprised by this? Maybe I should just write a post that says 'From The Ashes doesn't care about smooth continuity and has clumsily broken up these teams by fiat. Just ask Havok, Polaris, Angel, Storm, Omega Red, Jubilee and Shogo, etc etc. Also, it's pretty fucking mid' and pin it on my Tumblr.

That's no fun though. Even when it sucks, when it's safe and nostalgic, when everything you loved has been swept away and replaced with cardboard cutouts, when it's 'fine I guess', and even when it's great; the play's the thing. I love the X-Men and fans have as much ownership of the story as anyone. Not entitlement, just the right to be a part of the narrative, close to the characters. I find it fun and if I ever don't I'll stop (or spend a few years covering Krakoa). I hope you do too. Importantly, you should be critical of the things you love in good faith. As for Marvel the capitalist entity - all bets are off. Fuck em. They do it for the money, we do it for the love.

[all-pacas]

This is not a CamChase post, but, I actually do want to talk about something I feel is deeply underappreciated by fandom, which is: Cameron and Chase are actually friends.

Long before they ever sleep together, all the way back in early S1. The two of them are almost always shown to get along! Cameron sticks up for Chase the entire Vogler arc, refusing (incorrectly) to believe he would rat, or that he should be fired. Chase, noted apathetic, actually tends to go out of his way to compliment or stick up for Cameron in early episodes: he passes along her good ideas to House (Maternity), defends her from House's criticism (Detox), and compliments her good ideas in Pilot and DNR, something he notable never does once for Foreman.

They get along! They have a joking conversation about lab results and House and Foreman's fight in Socratic Method. In Paternity Chase makes a sort of borderline inappropriate joke that the patient should take his mind off his pain by admiring Cameron's boobs; Cameron laughs instead of getting offended. In Sports Medicine, he teases her about her upcoming date with House. In Hunting, before the meth hookup, Chase is openly worried about her and asks Cameron to drinks; he even offers to do extra work so she can take it easy! Chase! The laziest man alive!

But to me, the most telling example is in in Mob Rules. We're at the start of the Hameron arc, and last episode Cameron asked House if he liked her, which he didn't answer either way. And what does Cameron do? She talks to Chase about it.

CAMERON: Did House seem weird to you? CHASE: Are you expecting him to be weird? CAMERON: We spoke about how we felt. CHASE: You told him you liked him? CAMERON: No, of course not. CHASE: What are you talking about, then? CAMERON: I asked him if he liked me. CHASE: Why would you do that? CAMERON: Because… I like him.

They're friends! Chase reacts with zero surprise that Cameron likes House; she goes to him for advice in a moment she's feeling vulnerable. He already knows she likes House, Cameron wants his opinion. This is a conversation between friends.

In fact, this happens a few times. Notably, Cameron tries very hard to get Chase to open up to her in Cursed:

CAMERON: You know, parents are never as bad as kids think they are. CHASE: You like my dad so much, ask him out. CAMERON: [joking] I’d make an excellent step-mom, I’m very lenient. [pause] He’s your father, you never see him, and he’s here. Unless he’s done some unspeakable thing, you should lighten up. CHASE: Right, thanks for the tip.

And, yeah, she clearly doesn't get it, but she's trying! She's joking around, she cares. Cameron tries to get Chase's advice in Sleeping Dogs Lie, she commiserates with him in Deception, she unilaterally defends Chase in The Mistake. They joke around sometimes, she confides in Chase when the TB guy in TB or Not TB asks her out: Cameron goes to Chase for relationship advice! More than once!

These are conversations that do not happen with other characters: Cameron and Foreman indicate they respect one another medically, but never have personal conversations; Chase doesn't open up to anyone, period. But whenever Cameron is looking for advice or to share romantic gossip… she goes to Chase. And Chase, for his part, likes to tease her (and she him: sex can kill you was 1000% Cameron trolling him), but honestly tends to be… if not automatically sympathetic, he listens, he jokes about TB Guy, he knows about her crush on House and treats it like old news. They're! Friends! I would actually argue this is probably the main reason Cameron goes to him when she decides she wants casual sex: Chase is someone she, in fact, likes. Even if that liking is not romantic. (Even the btw we should have sex, I will never love you is uh. Unless you are totally deranged that is not how you approach a fwb situation. Unless you. You know. Know Chase isn't gonna be offended because he already knows you're friends and aren't trying to drag him.)

And this actually does continue once they do date, btw. They're constantly hanging out. Chase spends entire episodes of S5 just hanging out in the ER. He still likes to tease her (Whatever it Takes), she inexplicably/hilariously still ropes him into her House drama (Ugly), but I can count on one hand the number of times they bicker or are unkind and mean it. They are friends! They always were friends. And that was the case long before they ever hooked up. In an AU where they never dated, they would still be friends. Their (romantic) relationship was badly written, no one likes it, I get it. But honestly I really do love how well they got along in S1-2, and I wish people appreciated that friendship more.

[bucksboobs]

Feel free to answer this privately.

I can't help but wonder if the breakup was a Reylo situation, especially since it seemed so abrupt. Did some executive see the enthusiasm of Buddie shippers and their animosity toward this relationship and say "that's where we get our cash?" I don't know, but for a show that is in season 8 to regress one of its characters like this seems ... like executive meddling.

Honestly the disjointedness of it all for someone who has been keeping up with publicity since season 7 makes me think there was something behind the scenes, I don’t think Oliver advocating for Buck to have a second slut phase would have been enough to tip the scales this abruptly, I think someone with their eyes on social media thought the loudest voices were the majority and a decision was made based on that. Or maybe Tim was really resentful of the BuckTommy fans that talked to him on Facebook and then used what he said against other fans of the show and made the decision himself. Or maybe Oliver has enough sway on Tim to unilaterally decide he’s bored of Tommy, there’s a lot of possibilities.

My guess is we may never know.

[soath]

Of Contracts Between Gods and Men

On the Aeorian Kinsey-Deicide scale I’m a solid 5 (near exclusively god-preserving) which may seem surprising to my many dear associates who want those fundamental truths of existence wrecked. Without digging in any further, let’s do some quick religious history review on the question: Do you owe anything to the gods and do they owe anything to you?

The answer is not as universal as many raised in the nigh inescapable miasma of Christian theology may think! Reciprocal (or even unilateral) responsibility in religion comes and goes across history and geography. The Norse Aesir, for example, created humans but don’t owe them nada and only rarely bothered messing with them. The Greek pantheon are significantly more touchy on the subject of their pride but a person could manage offering no prayers or sacrifices as long as they didn’t promise any prayers or sacrifices. Probably. Compare this to Mayan theology, wherein both gods and humans have significant co-responsibility in maintaining balance; with ritual and sacrifice key to the continued safety of the polity. Divine-mortal relationships can be classified as nondirectional, unidirectional, or bidirectional with various advantages and disadvantages to each model. Gods come in lots of shapes and the demands they make aren’t universal!

A phrase that will often come up in any divinity studies is “covenant”. Originally a translation of the Hebrew berith or Greek diatheke, and also present in Islam, the Bahai’i faith, and possibly historical Phoenician religious practices, covenant theology has metastasized in Christian scholarship to the point it was genuinely hard to research this piece while dodging blogs by guys named Richard. But, broadly, it’s the idea of making an explicit deal with power(s) greater than yourself where you both have sides of the bargain to uphold.

Contract law is not the solution to every problem on earth or in fiction, but when the issue is a large disparity in power and mutual fears of future adverse behavior…. to quote Kate Bush “I’d make a deal with (the) god(s).”

Vitally, compared to other bidirectional pacts in world religion, Exandria has some advantages. For one thing, they have a godeater they’re right now helping to suppress. As long as the gods remain behind the divine gate they need mortal champions to effect their will—but that only holds true as long as the Divine Gate stays up. And unfortunately the problem with a fence someone else has erected is that you don’t know if they’ve kept a key.

If I was mortality’s lawyer? I’d ask for a second layer to that divine hamsterball I’d ask for anything left of the godkilling spark to be kept by the temples of Vasselheim—if they can’t be trusted with it no one can. And I’d promise cooperation from people of a certain degree of civic responsibility, not coerced or threatened out, whole hearted. But terms and conditions may vary.

Anyway, I guess the thesis is that it’s a terrible sin to destroy something you can’t comprehend with no idea of what the outcome will be (and a lot of you don’t seem to get the inconceivable joy of having/knowing/being a god, even just in fiction) but you can bring any monstrosity to the negotiating table. Don’t kill your gods, unionize against them.

[o-cute-blood-o]

Alice x Emmy

I don't expect you to forgive me, because I feel I need to explain. If any of you are willing to forgive me, I would like to thank you very much. I already know someone blacklisted me and after I calmed down I wasn't too angry about it because I understand you guys. I would do the same if I were you. I really need you to listen to my explanation. If you want to ask more, you are welcome to ask me and I will reply to you very seriously.

Hey I finally wanted to explain something below this post. I worked for four hours straight on this art. Because I don’t like saying things in tags that have nothing to do with the content of the tag. I was still very angry when I was drawing this art, but slowly I calmed down and thought about the whole thing. I am very sure that I was too impatient in this matter and I said very vicious things for my friend. I can't argue with that. 😶

I have to admit that because I care too much about my friends, things are out of control and have become like this (I am 16 years old and I am no longer a child, I should be responsible for what I say) I feel that 80% of all this is my fault. If I hadn't been unreasonable and talked too much, maybe things wouldn't have developed into what they are now.

I didn't think about the content of nsfw at that time. When inkichan came to tell me about this, my first reaction was to be angry, because I have also received such questions (anonymous), so I have been paying attention to inki's posts recently. . I also know that you actually don’t mean any harm. But at that time, we thought that anonymous questions were questions, which made us feel uncomfortable (we have all received anonymous questions). Inki did not publish the content of nsfw, nor did she forward the content of nsfw. She just clicked on that content. Thumbs up (this is the first time)

I strongly believe she made a mistake. When inki answered the anonymous question, she was just being weird, because I talked to her, and she felt ridiculous at the time. I strongly believe that inki is not a nsfw content lover.

I hope everyone will not disturb Inki recently, she is really sad about this. She devoted a lot because of her love for kg, but it was ruined just because she liked a post. . . I hope to give inki some time to calm down before responding more to this. I hope you can forgive inki if you can, because most of this is my fault. I don't want her to leave,,,,I just want her to feel like she's still worth staying here. .

Then I will respond to my attitude towards nsfw content:

I am somewhat disgusted with this type of content! Besides, it's still here. Please don’t unilaterally think that I am familiar with that artist just because her avatar is my art. I have never met her at all, and I only got to know her recently. . . So please don't think that I am one of the supporters just because I defended inki. I am not very happy about this.💔

[archivalofsins]

So, I've seen the new Amane gifs and-

Spoilers under the cut.

Big sister Shion, I think you misplaced your taser-

Again.

In all seriousness, I would like to discuss the second gif in this batch. Since at first glance, it looked like Amane arriving home to me. However, it could come off as an abduction. If she's leaving a public area or is in one. Something that's still a possibility given all the papers covering the door.

Unless, for some reason, Amane's family just hangs papers on the inside of their home door or own a business that does that. Either of these things could be the case. Since we see them working on a set in Magic, and they could put things up at home like this to remind them of certain things. That's not uncommon in familial residences, after all.

However, the papers and cards there looked to be put up for advertising purposes. Kind of like what one would see on a bulletin board just on the door. This is usually done on the front doors of businesses, which is why I said this makes it possible for this scene to be an abduction.

Now I do believe that Riyone, the one shown to use electricity on Amane in Magic, is more than likely her mother. However, I also believe her parents are more than likely divorced, and her mother was using the pilgrimage thing to kill two birds with one stone.

Q.09 Tell us your family structure.

Kazui: It’s only me now.

Amane: It was my father, my mother and me.

By explaining away her father's sudden absence and displaying to Amane that her father believes in this too. This would motivate Amane to take these teachings more seriously because, as we have been shown over and over again, Amane has great respect, admiration, and love for her father.

Q.02 Who do you look up to?

Kazui: You won’t know them even if I say, but I have a childhood friend I really respect. Sorry for just answering someone from my personal life.

Amane: My father. He’s been away on a trip for a while, but I think that’s very honourable of him.

So, if she was led to believe that her father followed these teachings as well she would try harder to be a good girl in order to,

A. Make her dad proud.

B. Be like her father.

C. Possibly see him if she's good enough.

Q.13 Who do you want to see right now?

Kazui: They won’t see me anymore.

Amane: My father. I want him to praise me for all my hard work.

Japan favors leaving the kid with the parent, which will cause the least change in the child's life. So, they tend to give custody to the parent the child is living with at the time. This is why it's become common for parents who are about to divorce their spouse to either kick the other out of the home or move without notice taking the kid(s) with them and then get a divorce.

"Parents secretly moving out and taking children with them isn’t unheard of-in fact, it’s often viewed in Japan as justified, in part because of instances where domestic violence is alleged. Such unilateral separations are legal in Japan, but if the other parent attempts to take the child back, that can be considered an illegal removal."

This would explain why Kazui and Amane were paired together as their stories may heavily involve highlighting the failings of the divorce system.

If Amane's mother did do this, then her father wouldn't have any legal right to see Amane, and her mom could just come up with any excuse for his absence she wanted. Something that divorced parents tend to do anyhow even when not given such beneficial circumstances to do it under.

"Each year, divorce affects roughly 200,000 Japanese children, double that of 50 years ago in a country where the total number of minors has plummeted. Of children with divorced parents, 1 in 3 said they eventually lost all contact with the noncustodial parent, a 2021 government survey showed. Given the system’s winner-take-all approach, spousal battles have only intensified, escalating the economic and emotional damage." X

Overall, given what we know, Amane's situation is rather complicated. However, I find it very telling that a lot of people are willing to endanger/torment a child for the safety and comfort of a bunch of adults.

Simply because this is always how child abuse and neglect has been treated by society. Especially when done by a parent. The concept itself is so abhorrent and senseless that many would rather look away from the issue entirely than confront it. Even if they must shift the blame to the victim to do so.

It's easier to go,

"Well, that kid must have done something to get that response from their parent."

Objectively true statement. Something was done to cause this. That's simply how cause and effect work. However, that something can range from things as simple as helping another person in a way they deem unacceptable

or breathing wrong.

The victim undergoing familial abuse doesn't get to pick the struggle it fucking picks them. It's Monday and their primary caretaker had a bad day at work? Guess who's getting beat again. This may be the rest of their evening or week now. Aw shit- did they get a low grade on a test?

Hope they're ready to go to the quiet room or sit at a table for seven hours to be taught this from the beginning. Because they're making their parent(s) look bad. If only they were smarter and not a complete embarrassment, then they could be having fun right now.

20/06/18

Amane: Thank you very much for teaching me. ……but, though I realise it’s strange me saying this after I asked you, I must admit it’s kind of unexpected. You give off the impression of someone who wouldn’t want to get involved in things like this.

Kotoko: ……well, you’re not wrong. I’m surrounded by people who could all be murderers, so I don’t plan on going out of my way to talk and make friends. I can’t let my guard down. But I like ambitious people like you. If you want to study more, then I’m happy to teach.

Amane: I see…… You look scary at first impression, but I quite like the way you treat everyone equally regardless of whether they’re older or younger than you. You don’t just treat me like a child or anything like that.

Kotoko: Treat you like a child? Hah, you’ve got to be kidding. Back when I was your age, I was already the person I am today. I don’t have any plans to let you get away with something just “because you’re a child.” ……remember that. There, I’ve finished marking. 83%. How do I put it… Even though you act like this, it’s not like you’re super brilliant at studying or anything, huh.

Ah, they managed to fix all those things; man, that's nice. Why do they always need something (clothes, food, water, etc)? Have they thought of their parent(s) needs lately? Recognized how hard their parent(s) are trying. They have it rather good, considering some kids are out there starving. How can they be so ungrateful?

Shifting the onus of blame onto the victim is quite literally a good way to make sure the bar is always moving, and success is unobtainable. This is literally the first thing abusive parents do. Make the abuse seem like the child's fault.

"Well, that was then - this is now. You don't have to keep behaving this way. You're in a safe environment."

An objectively true statement. However, that may not feel emotionally true due to how long the individual has been in an unsafe environment, the likelihood of them changing the behavior that they learned to cope with that immediately is pretty much nonexistent.

"If they were unhappy, they'd say something. It would show more they wouldn't be doing as good at school."

No, they wouldn't; depending on the severity and duration of the abuse.

Usually, the intention of child abusers, especially parents who abuse their children, is to not get caught. They will actively go out of their way to make it look like things are as good as possible. If the kid does or says something that contradicts that they'll just punish them. So, when well-meaning people go,

"Is something wrong?"

The first instinct for a child suffering under familial abuse may be to lie. Because if they don't, whoever they are talking to may discuss what they have told them with their caretaker leading to them getting in trouble again. Sometimes parents that partake in this type of behavior will even coach their kids when it comes to lying.

"How'd you get this?" - "Playing."

"Why did you miss so many days of school?" - "I caught a cold."

"Hey, do you like it at home?" - "Yep, my life is great. My parent(s) and I do (acceptable to mention hobby here) on these days. It's a lot of fun. Why do you ask?"

For children living under these sorts of conditions every waking moment is a fucking balancing act. They either say the right thing or get in trouble because at the end of the day they're going to have to go back home. So, children living under these sorts of conditions are well aware of what happens if they act a certain way in public by the time they reach school age.

"I mean, it could be that... but it's best not to pry."

The quiet part out loud. People don't want to be bothered by it. It's uncomfortable and usually considered to not be the business of outside parties unless it's child services. So, people look the other way and get uncomfortable when it's even alluded to near them. They'll look at the kid and go well, that's bumming me out. Best to think about things that can be solved at the end of the day. I mean, that's their legal guardian. I can't tell someone else how to raise their kids.

That's just how a majority of people view child abuse/neglect. Because children are either a nice thing to have around, or a problem that should be ignored or handled. Everyone in Milgram outside of Amane has been given a good deal of the benefit of the doubt. Despite them all being older and just as capable of understanding their behavior along with the hurt it has caused while rationalizing why they did it as she is.

Amane is the only character in the series who has been treated with the scrutiny of an adult despite everything she's been through. To me, that's very fucked up. It's gotten to the point that I don't believe people even recognize they're doing it. They don't recognize they're justifying continuing to let a kid remain in an abusive environment because it makes their lives easier. Because then they'll be more comfortable.

Directly mirroring the way child abuse is pushed to the side and swept under the rug in the real world.

Because at the end of the day people only care about children when it's convenient for them. When it's easy to care, when the person they're protecting the kid from is someone they already dislike. People have no trouble pointing out these issues then. Because it's easy to talk about the pain of children or someone being younger when it helps others support or deny something they already feel a certain way about.

It's easy for one to conclude that what Futa did was wrong, that Mu, Yuno, or Haruka made a mistake because of their ages and upbringing. Yet when shown the horrendous treatment Amane has endured and her age being put on full display from the beginning... Somehow there's still room to dance around the idea of whether she should be Innocent (Forgiven) or not.

Despite being given the option to not continue to torment the youngest, most vulnerable, and consistently neglected person here, many can suddenly find a good deal of justifications to continue her punishment.

All I did was say a bad thing was wrong, how was I to know that was gonna to happen; what about what you're doing?

"Futa isn't sorry, he just doesn't want to get punished." A lot of people wanted to discuss remorse earlier and how Futa displays it. Yet, showing remorse isn't indicative of change. Plus, remorse and shame look a lot alike.

The most important thing with Futa is he not only recognized that what he did was wrong regardless of how he displays that- He, also took the necessary steps to change his behavior moving forward. In order to prevent what had happened before from happening again. He's actively attempted to show more concern for those younger than himself since entering Milgram.

Even though he isn't particularly good at communicating, he goes out of his way to attempt to check in on others and asks about them. Despite saying he can't afford to do that he's still done so. Even going to inquire about Haruka.

He can do that but despite seeing the consequences of our judgements, a lot of people are too comfortable with doubling down on some of the most disenfranchised characters within Milgram. Simply because the idea of that sort of person existing to some is a personal offense.

That's fine Milgram let's you vote on that alone after all. However, I definitely wouldn't like my name being used to excuse the mistreatment of others. So, instead of saying it's for another prisoner's sake how about we cut out the middleman and get straight to the point.

Some people within the fandom would be more comfortable with Milgram if Amane were restrained. It would give certain individuals a sense of peace of mind.

No matter how easily broken that will be by whatever prisoner decides to act up next during the intermission in response to their verdict.

Despite everyone in Milgram showing little or no fear of Amane and Mahiru literally saying this,

Q.13 What do you think of Amane?

Shidou: Us adults need to do something for her. I can’t do anything while looking after the injured right now so I have to leave it to someone else, which is bothering me.

Mahiru: I would’ve loved to play a lot with her if she was doing better.

So, it'd be nice if people stopped using Mahiru as an excuse to hurt another prisoner that she has admitted to liking numerous times.

Q.10 Which of the other prisoners do you get along with?

Kazui: Shidou-kun, Mikoto and me all smoke together, so I think we get along well.

Amane: If I had to pick someone, then Yuno-san and Mahiru-san.

Plus, this is simply rich; looking back on all these people discussing the safety and care of children to compare it to how they're acting now. Justifying continuing the mental suffering of a child simply because it appears narratively convenient to them. You're going to meta vote the kid twice, really? Okay, go ahead.

That's the sort of place Milgram is after all. A place that says children only matter when they can fit into the framing most convenient to the one speaking. It doesn't matter if Amane is tortured blatantly on screen, it doesn't matter if she's having a rough time. Because a bunch of people have already decided that coddling adults who should damn well be able to protect themselves is more important than a child's safety.

Not surprising or disappointing, that's just the natural way of things in society.

I mean you might as well, I don't know-

Ignore the consistent signs of familial abuse happening around her, ostracize her because the idea makes you uncomfortable, avoid her like a plague. Put her in the corner because children are meant to speak only when spoken to.

Oh...hm that sounds familiar-

Lol, fuck kids though am I right? The only time people decided to care about Satoko, and her lived experiences, was when she was a teenager. Maybe if Amane was a few years older, then her lived experiences would matter. For now, though, nah-

Moving on! I'd also like to discuss two other gifs; the close-up of the baton with rope attached and the attempted flag twirling. Given what we've seen I believe that Purge March will be retreading what we are shown in Magic except subtracting Amane's idealized view of things.

It was implied that this was her ideal at the end of Magic through this image-

A scene that brings to question all of the presentation of Magic. That made me wonder if this is how things went or just Amane's more idealized retelling.

Star pointed out the absence of anyone in front of the stage in her post Sunday. However, there's another thing that's odd. The thing we see before the credits roll isn't everyone standing together as they are in the end but Amane by herself brandishing her wand-

However, unlike when she first brandished it her chibi form her wand moves from her left hand to her right back to her left again before the fake credits role at the end of Magic.

This also happens directly after everyone just mysteriously disappears like right before this she was dancing with just Yuri and Riyone-

Since we noticeably see Yuri isn't holding anyone else's hand and Riyone doesn't seem to be either. So, where did Gachata and Gozake go? Then when they are back in the credits it's like this-

Instead of Amane being in between Yuri and Riyone like she was before she's between Gozake and Riyone.

Since she did this when no one else seemed to be present this could mean a variety of things. One that she may have used the wand more than once, two she did a routine of some sort which she just finished, or even denote handedness meaning her left hand is more than likely her dominant one.

Considering how her routine begins with the wand in her left hand and ends with it in her left hand. However, I don't know enough about baton twirling to say. Plus, every video I've found on it has emphasized starting with one's right hand regardless of dominance. So, this is odd.

(Star here! Given the religious aspects of Amane's circumstances, it could also be something to do with the stigma left-handed people have/had. They might have forced her to use her right hand for things. A prime example of this is the gif of her attempting to spin the flagpole. This could indicate that Amane was forced to use her right hand, resulting in a loss of motor skills you wouldn't get when using your dominant hand. Further backing this is the fact that in the close-up gif of Amane twirling the baton, she starts with her left hand and then transfers it to her right)

Adding to that in baton twirling people are specifically trained to use both hands and it's widely accepted that one is meant to start with the right. Though the baton is usually meant to be the length of one's dominant hand.

X

X

Video on Baton Measuring: X, X

Outside of giving us a possible idea on her handedness- This also adds more depth to this answer given by Amane in her first written interrogation-

Q.14 Do you listen to music?

Kazui: I guess I do from time to time. It’s all super old music though, so I don’t think you’ll know it.

Amane: I don’t particularly listen to it for fun.

Because if Amane is majorette which has been all but stated, she would listen to music predominantly to practice her routines. This would give more depth to her pairing with Kazui as well. Since they've both been heavily related to the performing arts in some way.

Baton Twirling routines: X, X, X, X, X

What Amane appeared to be doing in the new gif using the baton with the string: X

(What Amane appears to have attempted with the flag toss: X)

Back to how Purge March may be the same events just less idealized.

If you look at these frames-

Notice that the way the flagpole lands on Amane's head and how the impact affects her mirrors this scene of Gachata flicking her forehead.

(This time, it's Star typing something! Gunsli was busy for a bit so I was headed to write this up o7

Taking this and the gif of her desperately trying to make her way through the water to grab the flag in front of her, it's likely they are going to use the switch from flagpole to baton as an allegory. Specifically, to better illustrate the timeline of events/order of circumstances.

Though, to expand on this, the flag may also represent the idea of everyone living happily together that Amane refers to in Magic. The baton, however, represents the ideologies surrounding the cult her family is involved in. If this is true, then it could also be visual shorthand for the idea of Amane changing her priorities.)

With that I think we're done here. There's a lot of interesting things about Purge March and I think it's going to follow up on Magic well. It's making me more and more excited for Double. Milgram has been very hush-hush about Amane and Mikoto. So, their songs might just end up speaking more than any of the others so far.

[dlatl98]

There is nothing that is useless to learn. But there are times when it is useless.

Celebrimbor woke up in the middle of the night and looked up at his fellow researcher and lover with a bewildered expression. With his back to the moon, the expression beneath his halo-like red blond hair was not clearly visible to Celebrimbor because of the shadows. If he had seen it, he would have been even more surprised. It was close to panic.

"You didn't wake me up because you were bored this time, did you?"

“That’s a malicious interpretation. The reason I woke you up before was because I had something to review.”

"It wasn't an important project, it was a personal project that you were pursuing. And you weren't going to follow my advice. You had already come to a conclusion. You woke me up because you wanted to tell me about it, and you were just bored. I can see it."

"This time, really not."

Celebrimbor decided to be content. It's almost like Annatar admitted that he woke him up because he was bored. “Good. So what is the reason this time?”

“You’re not planning on being tortured, are you?”

"What?"

Celebrimbor had his mental drawer ‘this was absurd to hear after waking up (though it wasn't the highest level of them all)’ open. Annatar, on the other hand, was very serious.

"You'll be careful not to be tortured in the future, right?"

"Uh... I think I'm being careful. But I guess I'm not the one who decides that. I don't plan on torturing myself either. Why on earth are you asking?"

Just then, outside, a dog could be heard howling at the moon like a wolf. There had been a few stray dogs around the house lately. It had nothing to do with the two, but Celebrimbor felt like Annatar's telling how ridiculous he was talking sounded like a dog's barking. It seemed like some ambitious young blacksmith had been experimenting with something called radio lately. Was it some kind of weird late-night broadcast? Some kind of crime special? After all, he should have stopped his lover from trying out the steam engine... Annatar bent over Celebrimbor and trapped him in her arms. The bed rocked gently.

"I'm serious. you won't get tortured, right?"

“Ah, as I said before, ultimately, it’s not me who decides. Even if I don’t want to be tortured, if someone does it to me, I’m tortured.”

"......That's true."

Annatar seemed to agree, then muttered something even stranger. “Then, have you learned what to do when you are tortured?”

"......"

Normally, in cases like this, it would be a person with common sense from the Second Age who would ask where something like that is, but the answer from a person with common sense who went through the First Age is a bit different. "Uncle Nelyo taught me. If you're tortured, you'll tell everything, so just tell everything from the beginning. He told me not to get hurt by insisting on keeping a secret that you can't keep anyway, and to tell everything. And he told me to tell them what they want to hear, if possible. That way, they're more likely to be satisfied."

Annatar was angry. “That’s when the torturing party wants to know the information. It’s useless when they do it because they want to torment!”

"......In that case, there's no way to avoid torture in the first place, right?"

"It's rarer in the world where there's no tricks and agreements."

"......Where's agreement in torture?"

“Communication is rarely more important than when violence is exchanged.”

"Oh Valar."

Celebrimbor had to admit that he wouldn't be able to sleep any longer tonight. Still, his hands were weak as he waved them. “Wait a minute. Violence is mostly used to unilaterally enforce one side’s will.”

"That's true overall. But it's also true that constant negotiation takes place in moment-to-moment interactions when violence is inflicted or suffered. It would have been easier to understand if you had been the victim of domestic violence, but the violence you experienced would have occurred only in the context of combat. ... That's fortunate."

"Oh, yes, thank you for your concern."

“Ultimately, the right to decide lies with the perpetrator.”

"That's right."

“I think you need to learn some tricks, too.”

“......And even if the decision  lies with the perpetrator, in many cases the decision is meaningless without the power to carry it out. I think I should point out that I am the monarch of Eregion.”

“And you are so lovely.”

“Now can I just say thank you and then compliment you and be done with it?”

“Keep going. You’re not going to sleep anymore. You’re showing physical signs of full awakening.”

"Please consider that I don't want to deal with this subject."

"I do, and I think it will help your comfort and my psychological well-being to deal with it. I will."

"You are so lovely too."

"Tyelpe."

“Ah, now can we agree that I will touch you and you will touch me and the oral conversation will stop here?”

Annatar decided to take up the subject. "You are persuasive and good at creating a friendly atmosphere, so you will be able to avoid torture in many cases. However, that also means that if the person is determined to torture you, they are determined. So let's focus on learning the skills of being tortured rather than avoiding torture."

"........"

If Annatar could decide what to talk about, Celebrimbor could decide whether to talk. He rolled over, covering his ears with his pillow. Annatar snatched the pillow away from him.

“Tyrant! What I need is not a knack for being tortured, but a knack for a lover who doesn’t let me sleep.”

"You know this is also a torture technique, right?"

“......I can’t believe it, my lover was a torture technician.”

Strangely, Annatar hesitated to speak. "Torture is a form of conversation. It's just that it's a difficult conversation for both parties."

"I've always thought that torturers are sadists."

“It is one of the rare things that people who enjoy doing it are not very efficient at. The purpose of torture is to transform the mind.”

"Not information?"

"If the goal is information, there should be more reasons why the Eregion Security Forces do not choose torture. Torture is more detrimental to obtaining information than you might think. You said that your uncle told you earlier, right? Tell them what you want. Torture is more about getting the answers you want than accurate information. Conversely, there are also cases where the torturer makes the subject guess the answers they want, and uses that to psychologically torture them through double messages."

"Ugh."

"It's physically and mentally demanding work because you have to carefully examine your target, pay attention to vital points, and always keep an eye out so that you don't go overboard with your own or your opponent's limits. That's why people who enjoy it excessively can't do it. It's better than hating it, though. It has to be a rare case where you're definitely going to kill your opponent and enjoy the process of killing them. Why torture them if you're just going to end it with killing them?"

“Well, thanks for the irritating explanation I didn’t want.”

"You're the monarch. This is generally considered to be one of the least preferred forms of governance, but it's good to know."

Celebrimbor stood up. “I don’t torture!”

"Don't promise. And before that, you are a monarch, so if you are caught, you will be tortured without fail."

"Oh... I didn't think about that. I will listen."

It wasn't really the reaction Annatar wanted. "......So if you get caught, you should definitely tell them everything they ask and create a friendly atmosphere."

"I can't give them information about Eregion!"

"The moment you get caught, all the information will come out anyway."

"Isn't there a way?"

"No. There isn't."

"There is. You always have a way. Tell me."

"No."

“There’s a difference between you don’t like it and you can’t. Tell me. Now I’m curious.”

".....As I said earlier, violence is a process of constant negotiation. If you’re going to kill, violence is actually inefficient. It’s messy and consumes a lot of physical and mental energy. In other words, the purpose of killing is surprisingly rare, but if you don’t want to kill, the perpetrator has to avoid vital points while using violence, and the victim has to convey his or her state. When it comes to torture, this interaction becomes more complicated. The purpose of the interaction is to transform the victim’s mind, and the purpose of the interaction is to unfairly place responsibility on the victim as a result of the interaction. So the victim has several options to choose from. One is to try to infer the torturer’s purpose and give him or her the illusion that he or she has achieved it. To put it simply, it’s about protecting your body while exaggerating the signals of pain and submission. In fact, there is a problem that it serves a practical purpose beyond satisfying the torturer's fantasy. Most torturers also pursue the goal of inducing the victim to distort his or her self while attempting to negotiate with the torturer.

However, if the other person's purpose is not that, but to inflict a certain amount of pain or to pursue their own pleasure without killing you, then it is possible to enter a dissociative state. The pain is reduced more than you think when you dissociate. Usually... It is useful in sexual torture, humiliation, and social torture such as solitary confinement. Because there is less need to monitor the situation in real time and protect the body. So, if you are hoping for rescue,"

And if the situation is such that the monarch is captured, there is a high probability that there will be no rescue. Celebrimbor waited. Annatar continued. “I said it was a negotiation and a conversation, but it was also a dance. If the rhythm or flow of exchanging pain is off, there can be catastrophic results. You can intentionally expose a vital point at a time when a strong blow is expected or distort the signal to induce death. If you feel like you can't wait for rescue or me... If the torture becomes prolonged, it is also possible to find a situation where there is no supervision and weaken the body first through sleeplessness, fasting, and self-harm."

"Hmm."

“So, first set the standard. How long will I wait? How much will I disclose? The above strategies cannot be mixed. The purpose must be clear.”

"Oh, then you start. How far will you go to save me? You'll have to stand in line. Even though it looks like this, I'm the monarch, so I have an army to save me."

Celebrimbor said lightly. Annatar was also sarcastic. "There is no army in Eregion. The guards are not an army. Your High-king is far away, and if you are going to use mercenaries and conscripts, then a commander is important, and I am the only commander in Eregion."

"Me? I am a brave Feanorian who survived the First Age. Feanorian was synonymous with brutal warfare throughout the First Age."

"Surviving means you are a fool for a Feanorian."

"I am hurt."

“You don’t want to be a good commander, you don’t in the first place. A commander is someone who ultimately chooses one of many possibilities and closes doors, but you are someone who opens doors. Some people are just not born for that.”

"Oh, after all this talk of torture and death and incompetence, you're finally offering me flattery. Should I accept your cheap flattery now?"

"If you feel this is flattery, then you are a person whose values ​​do not fit the commander's. I praised you by your own standards, so there is no need to flatter you."

"But you should make up for calling me a flaw in our family with flattery."

"You are the strongest Feanorian and The greatest conqueror Feanorian."

“Oh, come now. Is it a little too late to forgive you by flattering.”

"This is not flattery, it is merely a statement of facts."

"I will not give you extra points for using the technique of emphasizing through negation."

he woke up, and if he went to work now, it would be a nuisance to the secretary and others, and he didn't want to get out of bed, so Annatar decided to respond to the soothing look in his eyes. He also wanted to be with him more than in bed. So he decided to start with the easiest thing for Celebrimbor, even though it was usually the hardest for him. Annatar whispered as she kissed Celebrimbor's neck.

"The most amazing and greatest Feanorian, The Not Dispossessed. The greatest conqueror Feanorian."

"You're wrong."

This was a bit insulting because he was telling the truth thinking. “Oh.” Celebrimbor held back his laughter and patted Annatar's shoulder at the tone of provocation that was evident despite the single word. Slowly. Not at all subtle.

"If you want to call me by my full name, you should add my love."

".......the Most amazing and greatest, The Not Dispossessed. Lord of Lords, greatest conqueror with the terror of terrors. Curufin Celebrimbor Feanorian, my beloved, most radiant and darkness covering darkness."

Celebrimbor deliberately raised his head haughtily, smiling inwardly as always at his lover's excessive adjectives. "There's a lot missing, but that's all for today."

"I'm looking forward to it."

Annatar said, her voice slightly hoarse, kissing Celebrimbor’s hair. “I look forward to seeing what you have to offer tomorrow.”

“It’s good. It’s good to have unpredictable tomorrows. If I didn’t want that, I wouldn’t have come here. If I wanted yesterday to be like today, and tomorrow to be like today, there’s no better place than Valinor.”

The voice that answered back was more of a growl full of possessiveness than a voice. “The good place is not for you. You will go mad in a world that was tailored for you. Your kind should never have been there in the first place.” he swallowed, unable to say that It was same as how much he had to fall here. Not yet. As he sucked his lover's neck, he heard his trembling voice through his lips and skin.

“I agree with that, but...” Closing his eyes, leaning his head back, Celebrimbor stroked Annatar’s cheek and sighed. "At the same time, we must go there eventually. Weary and worn-out Elves who cannot die, and yet can live no longer, must go there, and weary and worn-out ones cannot be helped. If we are unlucky enough to die, we will go there all the more through the Halls of Mandos. What will you do when I go?"

"......."

Annatar froze. Quickly, Celebrimbor placed his ear, cheek, and neck against Annatar's chest. Even if it is a beat that he has made up, he wants it to resonate. “It’s okay. It’s a long way off. You don’t have to worry now. At least I’m full of energy now, and you… you’ll be okay. Who knows, maybe I’ll be allowed to come here. Mother won’t bash me in the back of the head with a statue this time.”

Annatar groaned. It was definitely the sleeping potion last time. Celebrimbor chuckled at that moan. “Don’t worry. Either way. You can wait here.”

"........"

Annatar's silence was heavy. If he could not stay here, if he had to go there in the first place, then permission was meaningless. He sensed that Annatar had a dark past, that at worst he might have been a Maia of Morgoth.

Celebrimbor found himself ridiculous. He may not be an elf, but he loved an immortal, and among all these immortals, he is the one who cannot come to Aman with him. In this Marred world, it would be foolish for the one of Eldar to love someone who cannot come to Aman.

And it was truly Feanorian to choose to ruin oneself.

Also, don't regret it.

And to resist fate. Celebrimbor rethought the plan in his head. I, we can do it......

[sunderingstars]

Dice Time! 🎲

✩ ‧₊˚ ⌞ DICE ROLL #3 — A KISS ON THE FOREHEAD ⌝

based on this post!

word count: 1k

what the stars reveal: tamaharu, post-canon (manga), they’re both in college, tooth-rotting fluff, tamaki being dramatic as usual (affectionate), venting my college frustrations through a fictional character, idk if you can tell but i waxed a little poetic near the end 😳

— congratulations on inspiring my first tamaharu piece! :3

In concept, contracts weren’t difficult to understand. They were simply agreements between parties that created legal obligation for one thing or another. However, the difficulty came with all of their branching paths; implied, fixed price, unilateral — they all had slightly different approaches, small differences that needed to be kept in mind at all times. One misstep could lead to less-than-savory reviews at best and a complete logistic, even illegal, mess at worst.

So… what’s the answer to this damn question?

Haruhi tapped her pencil against the corner of her mouth, shifting the workbook in her lap ever-so-slightly. Maybe, if the page hit just the right angle, the paragraph of text would re-word itself into something comprehensible. Maybe.

After a few tries and meager results, she sighed in defeat. She’d known law school was going to be difficult, sure, but her poor high school self hadn’t known the half of it. Strict deadlines, bad professors, incomprehensible class structures — they were an entirely different experience for someone who went in thinking college was supposed to be… well… helpful. 

She sighed. It was just the late hour getting to her, she knew, but she couldn’t help it. Not when this annoying question didn’t even have anything to do with the current—

“—Haruhi?”

She jumped. Hard. In what could only be described as sheer dumb luck, the flash of blond beside her ducked away just in time to avoid being head-slammed.

Shocked, Haruhi turned her body to peek over the edge of the sofa, settling her chin on the back cushion. Below her was a boyfriend-shaped face, looking back at her with just as much surprise. “Tamak—?”

“—Oh, thank god!” Soft tears began to well at the corners of his eyes, violet and earnest. In a movement faster than she could blink, he was tilting up and over to wrap his arms around her half-twisted form. It was nice — warm and inviting and rose-scented the way it always was — but for a worrying moment, she thought something was wrong. Then, he said: “I thought you’d become a zombie. Like in those scary apocalypse movies.”

Haruhi froze, then sighed. Deeply. 

“There, there,” she said flatly, unfortunately unable to pat him on the back due to the workbook and pencil still hanging in her grasp. Then, before he could start rambling on about the logistics of how he would’ve “definitely taken care of her as a zombie by bringing fresh brains from the morgue back home instead of groceries,” she turned swiftly back to her work, letting the guise of study change the topic of conversation.

Sure enough, less than a moment later she felt Tamaki’s soft-conditioned hair brush against the side of her forehead. “What are you working on?”

His voice was softer, this time, tempered to a murmur above her ear, and she could smell the faint lilac of cologne carried on his breath. 

“Oh, you know,” she shrugged. Gave the workbook a wave. “Just… this.” 

Tamaki hmphed. As if on cue, soothing hands came to rest on her skin, pressing gently at the juncture between her shoulders and neck. She was always vague when stressed, and they both knew it.

“Wanna take a break, then?” he asked.

Instead, Haruhi leaned into the faint knead of his palms, eyes still trained on the page in front of her. “You’d make a good masseuse.”

“Haruhi,” he warned, “you know how I feel about you overworking yourself.” Then, somewhat proudly, “And my services are exclusive.”

Haruhi sighed for the umpteenth time that night. There wasn’t much she could do — she was too tired to deflect Tamaki’s stubbornness, and a break did sound nice. However, she also couldn’t avoid one looming fact: the homework was due tomorrow. Eventually, she made a compromise.

“Fine,” she said. “But only for five minu—”

The warmth behind her was already retreating, shooting around the length of the couch to plop down beside her with an enthusiastic “yes!”. Like an overly-attached dog, Tamaki’s face soon found itself bundled into the crook of her neck, pouting as she put the pencil down but refused to set the workbook aside. It only took one whining “Haruhi…” before she was groaning and setting the papers on the coffee table too. 

With that, Tamaki was free to monopolize her space, humming contentedly as his arms shifted to curl around her torso.

“You’re incorrigible, you know,” she said, eyes crinkling with the beginnings of a smile.

“I know,” he mumbled.

“Happy now?”

A ruffle of hair against her chin as he nodded. “Mhm.”

For the first time in a while, Haruhi didn’t sigh. It always ended like this — Tamaki curling up against her like a personal heater, turning inward like she was all he ever needed. It made her wonder why, sometimes; why he cared so much, why he bothered, why exactly he saw what he saw in her. But it was difficult to hold onto those worries when he was holding onto her even tighter. When he was going out of his way to leave her spare umbrellas on rainy days, to buy her favorite giant tuna at the store, to bring home facemasks with cute little raccoons he said looked “just like her.” It was like he catalogued every little thing about her, kept them pressed in the notebook of his mind like flowers he never let wilt. 

When she sniffled, he shifted to look at her. His eyes bore into her like violets, and when his mouth opened he breathed lilac, words landing rose-tinted against her skin: “You okay?”

In response, she ducked her embarrassingly watery eyes against the sunflower strands of his hair. “Yeah…” Then, she nosed her way to his skin, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. Something familiar and warm bloomed in her chest. It unfurled in petals of sunshine and rushing water, and it occurred to her that she must be the luckiest person in the world to feel it.

“…I just love you.”

She didn’t have to see Tamaki’s face to know something was blossoming within him too, curling into a smile on his lips.

“I love you too.”

© written by sunderingstars. do not copy, repost, translate, modify, or claim my work as your own.

[mentally-ill-for-bes]

Blue Eye Samurai Analysis Episode 1

As a clarification, the series of this analysis will be done chapter to chapter, having so many parallels between chapters there will be, spoilers. Many spoilers possibly.

Now, as another clarification, I’m not a Japanese person nor someone related to Japanese culture, therefore this analysis will go around narration and characters arcs and parallels. This being said, everything shown here is my interpretation of the show, I'll be more than pleased to talk about different opinions since it's done with respect.

And the last clarification, I will be referring to Mizu as she/her, since it’s what creators and producers refer to. This isn’t intended to invalidate headcanons or other interpretations.

btw, i don’t know how to do gifs, therefore this will be much less visually pleasing than I would like it to be, sorry!!

Now, let’s start!

The first shot of the show is fire, which will be seen later in the relation of fire with Mizu (and later with Akemi); now, fire acts like a visual opposite of the snowflake on the screen. Fire produces warmth, and snow produces coldness.

We continue showing scenes that show the visual opposites of warmth and coldness.

And the paragraph that set up our story.

“In 1633, Japan closed its borders to the outside world. Completely.

Citizens would never see a white face, nor any face that was not Japanese.

A child born mixed race would be considered less than human.

Pitiable. Impure.

Monstrous.

From these times rose a legend.

Of a swordsman. Of a sword.

Of revenge.”

And the way Mizu is introduced is in the snow. Visually, this teaches us her color palette, which is comprised of different tones of blue. But this also makes us relate her not to the snow, but to its coldness. This is reaffirmed by the style of the title, which is blue. Mizu is blue.

Then, she enters the noodle shop, where Ringo is presented in this lightless atmosphere in gray tones. He has a short and unilateral conversation with Mizu. The fact that Mizu doesn’t answer anything nor raises her head to at least see Ringo reaffirms her coldness. But this interaction shows us how despite his violent father; Ringo enjoys serving noodles, he’s satisfied when Mizu devours all the bowl, he enjoys helping.

However, the catalyst for the friendship between her and Ringo is this scene:

“What are you? A dog? You let a dog serve food!”

“Told you. Round eyes. Like a dog”

Sure, Mizu empathizes with Ringo because he’s shown as this sweet and kind character but also because she sees a lot of herself in him. They’re both ridiculed by being compared with dogs for things they cannot control: Mizu for her eyes, Ringo for losing balance, and spilling soup (due to Hachiman being aggressive to one of the girls he bought). At that moment, Mizu wasn’t strong enough to defend herself, but now, she’s strong enough to defend Ringo (and to get the information she wants at the same time).

The next thing we know is that Mizu has been looking for Hachiman due to his possession of a European gun.

“Of course, I’ve heard of you. Never leaves a village without buying one of its daughters.”

Because Mizu doesn’t just empathize with Ringo, but also with the girls he bought.

The next thing we know is that Mizu cuts Hachiman’s fingers, first the index and middle finger then cut the ring and little finger. First, the fingers used to hold a gun.

Then, the fingers he used to slap Ringo and touch the girl’s face. It’s curious how she cuts all the fingers but the thumb, especially when the one who sold the gun is Heichi and then they’ll introduce us to his collection of thumbs.

+ She cutting the fingers resonates with the scene when she cuts Heichi’s hand, but that’s for later!!

Then, as we know, Ringo follows her, she sees in her someone great, but not for her ability with a knife but for her ability to stand up for others. Sure, Ringo says he wants to be a samurai like her and it that moment, he wants that. But Ringo’s arc goes through being great and how, not being the same that Mizu but for being great by his own qualities and strengths.

However, now, Mizu represents a hope for him, a hope that an outcasted as him as be something great.

But Mizu doesn’t want friendship or anything that can deviate her from her purpose.

She found a temple and her pray is clear:

“To a man lost in the dark, an ember can light the way. Thank you for my ember. I was lost without course so long. Please. Let this ember’s light brighten a path from this Heiji Shindo to the men I seek. Please guide my steps until I find them. Please give me the strength to kill them. Or let me die.”

This helps us to understand her character, she has a purpose in life, and it’s achieving it or death. But she won’t let death reach her, literally is need a stronger one that lets her die, because she won’t permit herself that sacrifice.

We pass to a Mizu’s memory of her childhood, where a bully (we’ll later known as Taigen) and his gang persecutes her around the town while it’s raining, more elements asociating Mizu to water.

Mizu’s wearing handmade glasses:

Nice reference to how the first models of sunglasses were, the first sunglasses were created by the Inuit.

Going back to the memory, Taigen’s wearing an orange kimono, even when his representative color as an adult is green.

Interesting, since in color wheel orange is opposite to blue.

So during childhood, Taigen’s definitely an antagonist to Mizu, but once they’re both adults, he’s represented by green. Green is closer to blue than orange is, so I interpret this change of colors as the ability of Taigen to change. During childhood, he’s an antagonist role, but being an adult, he’s at her side (during battle and in the color wheel, lol). And that’s what Taigen’s arc is about, about changing for the better, it wouldn’t surprise if at some moment he starts getting dressed in blue to symbolize he’s at Mizu’s side. Or going back to orange, symbolizing the opposite.

The next character introduced is Swordsfather.

He’s showed under blue lights, his clothes looking blue. Different from Taigen, he’s at Mizu’s side.

But the next thing is shown about Swordsfather is fire, he’s under warmth lights, his clothes looking brownish.

Swordfather’s home is mix between warmth and cold lights. He’s in the middle of it.

This talks pretty well about the duality of the character, Swordfather isn’t associated with a color or an element but metal, metal can change and be rebuilt over and over again. He’s warm and cold at the same time. The same duality that Mizu will have to learn at some point.

But something to notice is that Mizu’s glasses are yellow/orange, while her whole dressing is blueish, only thing that has a warmth color are her glasses. The glasses she use to hide his identity as a racial mixed person.

And the scene!! This obviously puts a romantic background with the gentle music and the slow-mo, but it’s also useful to establish the opposite color palettes they have. While Akemi is surrounded by golden and warmth, Mizu is under the snow, surrounded by cold.

Even when it’s snowing outside, she’s surrouned by golden lights, dressed all in red. She’s associated with femenity, his kimono has flowers in it and she has butterflies and flowers in her hair, accessories made in gold. Totally different to how Mizu’s shown, dressed all in blue but her glasses, with much simpler accessories than Akemi, even when gold is a metal, Mizu’s shown manipulating silver metal’s. They’re opposites.

She’s talking with Seiki about how to talk to her father:

Even when she dislikes his advice (with fair reason) lilting her voice will be something will see she uses against men, like a woman who intends to get what she wants; when she talks to her father, when she meets Mizu, when she talks to shougon’s son.

“—When you speak to him, remember to lilt your voice.

—So, I should speak like a child

—Or like a woman who intends to get what she wants.”

In the end, she convinces her father to allow a marriage between her and Taigen. Saying how he sees a part of himself in Taigen. (If my father ever said he sees himself in my partner I would honestly run lol)

When Taigen’s presented on screen, he’s dressed in green but the scarf, this reminds me of how during his childhood (when he’s totally antagonistic to Mizu) he’s dressed in orange. In the color wheel, green is opposite to red, Akemi’s color, the only thing in Taigen’s outfit that brings him close to Akemi is his scarf and the comb Akemi gives him; both things that will be taken by Mizu.

But we’ll talk about that in the next episodes, for now, let’s focus on Mizu.

Shindo Dojo has a yellow uniform and all the room is iluminated, contrasting Mizu with her blue outfit.

Before defeating all Shindo Dojo, Mizu has a interesting memory about Swordfather, the lines I think has most impact in the narration are these.

“—What is a sword?

—The soul of a samurai.

—It is a line. On one side of the line is life. The other, is death. The edge we forge cuts the line between life and death.”

And this scene:

“—No man can tame this cursed metal.

—Perhaps it doesn’t want to be a sword.

—All metal wants to be a sword.”

It’s our first introduction to a figure of the 4 white men, and the whole background is blue, being in a castle in the water, which I take as a reference to Frowler’s castle in the water but also this bends the things Mizu’s is associated to her “demon” state. Not by an omnipresent narrator, but by her own narration. She doesn't see herself as half-demon half-human, she sees herself as a total demon.

Ending with the memory, she has the coolest fight with all the dojo, until Taigen appears, literally wearing Akemi’s gift, at this point we know that he’s 1. Proud of being Dojo’s champion, 2. Proud of his engagement with Akemi (in that order in specific). He wears his gift as (in my interpretation) a show of power over Mizu, they’re exactly in the same positions as during childhood, Taigen’s standing up looking arrogant and Mizu’s on the floor. But this time the result is different.

In both moments is Taigen who throws away her glasses.

In another great scene of fighting, Mizu gets the information about Heiji Shindo and she cuts Taigen’s hair. Cutting his hair removes from him his status, identity, and the chance of getting married to Akemi. At the same time, he's turning him into an outcast, now ignored and rejected by the masters who praised him before. He goes from being benefited by the system to being affected by the same system he supported and contributed to.

And as I said, Mizu literally takes the comb that represents Taigen and Akemi’s compromise and throws it.

In a more personal sense, it shows Mizu’s empathy along with women. She understands their struggles and she does what she can for them.

At the end of this episode, even Mizu’s sword has a nice edge that looks like waves. This sword is an important element in Mizu’s narrative, as she said, the sword is the soul of a samurai; and even when Mizu doesn't considerate herself a samurai, others do; Ringo considers her a samurai, even Taigen (even when he doesn't admit it) do it. Otherwise, they wouldn't have had a duel the way samurais.

And her sword is just like her, "no man can tame this cursed metal" is what Swordfather said, as no man can tame (what people consider) a cursed human, "perhaps it doesn't want to be a sword" said Mizu, she doesn't want to be a samurai, she wants revenge. But all people keep perceiving her as one.

What will happen to Mizu's sword is what will happen directly to her soul.

[wolblogsposts]

I Hate You Darling

Chapter 1 : Journalist from South Korea

____________________________________________

____________________________________________

A beautiful woman who had just turned 28 years old had just woke up from a deep sleep, when she heard the sound of her cell phone's alarm. Her hand felt on the nightstand near her bed. After she managed to reach her cell phone, she immediately took it and got up and turned off the alarm.

After waking up, the woman lazily went straight to the bathroom to wash her face, brush her teeth and straighten her hair. She then went to the kitchen to make breakfast. While making breakfast someone called her on her cell phone, and she immediately picked it up.

"Hello?."

"Hello, Mrs. Han Seo-ah. Can you stop by the office for a moment? There is a work you have to do."

The women named Seo-ah only said yes to her boss who was on the other side of the phone. After her boss was satisfied enough to hear that she was going to the office soon, he immediately ended the phone call unilaterally.

Seo-ah continue her cooking activities. After the food was ready, she brought a plate of Kimbab and Gaji namul onto the dining table. When the food he makes will be eaten. Her cell phone rang again, but this time it wasn't from her boss but from her husband. Seo-ah didn't care and immediately rejected the call and started eating her cooking.

After finishing her breakfast, Seo-ah washed her eating utensils. After washing, she returned to her room to start preparing to go to the office.

♤♤♤

After finishing preparing. Seo-ah went to the bus waiting area in the middle of the city, she went to work by riding that transportation. While waiting while playing with his cellphone, a large television on display in the city center showed news about the no.1 footballer named Noel Noa.

Seo-ah stared for a moment at the giant television with an annoyed look then looked back at her cell phone screen, until finally the bus came and Seo-ah immediately got into the bus. While on the bus, a message came in on her cell phone. When she looked at it, it appeared to a message box from her husband.

Cyborg Bastard

•「Dear how are you, are you okay? How is your work? Is everything going smoothly? You haven't reply my message for the past year」

Seo-ah looked at her cellphone screen which displayed the message her husband had sent with an annoyed look. Again, she didn't care and immediately turned off her cell phone.

Not long after, the bus she was riding finally arrived in front of a television station building which usually shows various events in the world of sports. Such as matches in various sports fields or latest news about top sports athletes.

Seo-ah immediately walked into the large building and went straight to her superior room by taking the elevator. When she arrived on the eighth floor, Seo-ah superior room was located. She immediately stepped out of the elevator as soon as the elevator door opened.

Seo-ah then went to her superior's room. Arriving at the entrance to the room, her superior knocked on the door.

"Come in." Said the voice of a man who already fifty-two years old. After getting permission, she immediately opened the door and went inside.

"Oh, Mrs. Han Seo-ah. You finally came, sat in the empty chair in front of me."

Seo-ah immediately sat down in an empty chair without being asked twice. "So what job will you give me?" She ask.

Her boss sipped his coffee for a moment then answered, "The job is quite easy. You just need to go to Japan and start covering the League Neo Egoist, whose match is currently taking place."

"Why do I have to cover that match, the match only tests potential young footballers in Japan. It's better if you give me the task of covering the daily lives of players who are in the best European clubs at the moment."

Her boss just sighed. "Yes, I know. But you know, our TV station's rating is currently being rated as bad by viewers and people. They think that our TV station hasn't been showing matches in various sports fields lately. We've actually been This time the focus is more on highlighting the daily lives of athletes."

"Whatever the reason, I don't want to cover that match" Seo-ah said.

Her superior immediately glared at her. "Mrs. Han. Please, this is for the good name and rating of this TV station. You are the main asset of this television station because of your skills in compiling news reports. So please, I want you to do this. Who else should I ask for help?."

Seo-ah finally gave in and finally she agreed to take on this task. After all she was doing this for a paycheck.

"Good. possibility, you can fly straight to Japan in five days. I will book a plane ticket to Japan for you, and I will also inform the Blue Lock program manager about this."

.

.

.

.

.

After finishing discussing with the boss for two minutes, Seo-ah finally left the room. While walking past where the other employees were working, some of them looked at Seo-ah while whispering. "Is that the woman named Seo-ah?."

"Yes, that's her."

"I heard she married a footballer."

"That's impossible. Moreover, the footballer also denied that rumors."

Seo-ah didn't care about the whispers that came out of the staff's mouths, and continued walking out of the building where she worked. Then Seo-ah returned home to her apartment by getting into a taxi. When she arrived at her destination, the woman changed clothes and took her tablet to search for information about the Blue Lock program and the Neo Egoist League on the internet.

While browsing the contents of an internet site that reported about Blue Lok, she accidentally found a site that reported about professional football players who were selected as coaches. Seo-ah's index finger pressed the screen until the site page opened, When the page opened, her gray eyes saw the names of famous football strikers who were coaches at Blue Lock.

Her eyes continued to trace every paragraph of the site's text, until her eyes saw the name Noel Noa written on it. Seo-ah immediately got up from the sofa with a surprised look.

"So that bastard became a coach? It's better that I don't go there than that I have to meet him. But if I don't go there... I won't get a salary."

Seo-ah threw the tab on the sofa and turned on her cellphone which had been turned off for a long time. When it was turned on, Seo-ah immediately saw many notifications of telephone calls from her husband.

Seo-ah sighed and placed her cell phone on the table in front of her. Then he decided to sleep upstairs to rest after working overtime for three months. While she was asleep, her husband sent her another message notification.

.

.

.

.

.

A man continues to stare at his cellphone as if waiting for a reply to his message. "Is she still in her office?."

"Are you still not asleep yet? Mr. no.1" Ego said, he is the manager and trainer in Blue Lock. He was also Noa's former teammate ten years ago. Or rather his rival.

"No. I'm still not sleepy yet." Noa then turned off his cell phone and put it back in his jesrey jacket pocket.

"Oh, yes Noa. Earlier Anri received a call from the CEO of the TV station South Korea where your wife work. He said Seo-ah would come here in five days."

Noa, who heard that, felt happy when he heard that his wife would come here, but his flat face tried to hide his joy. "When she come you have to show your skills in front of your wife."

Ego patted Noa's broad shoulder then just walked away while waving his hand until he was out of sight. Noa opened his cellphone again, and on the screen lock there was a photo of Seo-ah wearing a straw hat summer on her head, and wearing a black swimsuit.

Noa smiled faintly when he looked at his wife photo. "Honey. I will wait for you" then his finger rubbed Seo-ah's face in the photo.

Next chapter: Meet

[i-only-ever-asked-questions]

Like many others, I have a lot of thoughts about different things in Season 2. So many things that I want to write about that I end up not writing anything at all. So if I am ever going to get things out I should start now. Maybe I am crazy, maybe I am not, but I read the conversation between Aziraphale and the Metatron a little differently.

The first thing we see is the end of that conversation: M: You don't have to answer immediately. Take all the time you need A: I- I don't know what to say M: Well then, go and tell your friend the good news I don’t think this is about taking his time to decide whether he is taking the job or not, Aziraphale already said yes.

That is why the Metatron ends with a confident “Well, then go and tell your friend the good news”. When Aziraphale turns around and walks towards the bookshop, his face is like that of a student going to defend their thesis in front of their committee or an accused going to their trial. It is scary but you can’t turn back.

The “Take all the time you need” is about breaking it to Crowley that Aziraphale is going to Heaven and that “Crowley can become an angel again.” Take your time to have this conversation. Aziraphale doesn’t know it is a goodbye yet; Metatron does. That’s why he comes in immediately after Crowley leaves and innocently asks “How did he take it?” meaning “how did he take the news that you are leaving?” He didn’t ask “Is he coming?” or “did he accept?” or anything of the sort. He knew Crowley wouldn’t come from the very start.

“I don't know what to say” may then be a “thank you, I am so very grateful for your generosity.”

Aziraphale said yes without discussing it with Crowley first, which is a very Aziraphalean thing to do. Remember how he lied to Crowley about Adam’s whereabouts? Crowley and him were not having an argument about it then, they weren’t fighting, in fact Crowley was sure they were on the same page, in the same team. Aziraphale unilaterally decided he was going to tell Heaven because Heaven were the good guys and they would stop the apocalypse if only they knew where Adam was.

At the bench Crowley offers his place and Aziraphale responds “I don’t think my side would like that" He hasn’t forsaken Heaven yet, he still has hope, he still believes Heaven can correct course and become what Heaven is supposed to be because underneath, the core of Heaven is inherently good. He went rogue because he didn’t trust Heaven’s current management, but he didn’t lose faith in the Heaven-that-should-be.

In the first episode of Season 2, at the coffee shop, he sheepishly says "It’s nice to tell someone about the good things you’ve done now that I’m not reporting to Heaven". He misses Heaven, he misses his job, his purpose. He is unmoored and Crowley is not being the supportive friend Aziraphale needs right now. Aziraphale is going through a crisis that Crowley went through and moved on from a long long time ago. Crowley forsook Heaven after they kicked him out and metaphorically forsook Hell very early on ("I'm on my side" in Job’s times already). He's peachy! And he can't understand that Aziraphale cannot just walk away.

Metatron exploited Aziraphale’s doubts, validated and encouraged them. "But Heaven. Well, it’s the side of truth, of light, of good" is a line that Aziraphale would never have uttered if not for the encouragement that the Metatron gave him. “Like the old times. Only even nicer” is Aziraphale’s imagination running wild, after the beautiful picture Metatron painted. The Heaven-that-should-be is the Heaven-that-was before the rebellion, the Heaven that Aziraphale can make happen again. How can Crowley not see that?!

“But… obviously you said “No” to Hell, you’re the bad guys” is also Metatron’s fueling Aziraphale’s doubts. “you’re” instead of “they are”. If Heaven is inherently the side of good, then Hell is inherently the side of evil. Angels are inherently good and demons are inherently bad. Crowley is at heart a little bit of a good person, Aziraphale has 6000 years of proof. His Fall must have been a mistake or something. How can Crowley not jump at the opportunity to go back? To right that wrong!?

Metatron is not stupid, “The name of your establishment Give Me Coffee or Give Me Death. I assume they always ask for coffee [...] so predictable”. He doesn’t say it outright, but in urging Aziraphale to take the post, he is also implying that the alternative is “death”, it’s a threat, bad things would happen to Earth, to humans, to Crowley. See how Gabriel messed up, he was a bad Supreme Archangel, he led Heaven astray, he didn't work out. if you don’t step in, everybody will suffer, you are the angel for the job, only you can bring Heaven back to the light, to what it should be. For Aziraphale it is a bit of a no-brainer. Now he only needs to convince Crowley.

[palant1r]

One trick I've picked up from my dad to be more even-handed in both personal and political debates is the question: is this an area where two reasonable people could disagree?

Whether the answer is yes or no completely changes how I engage with the argument.

To be clear, to admit that something is an area where two reasonable people could disagree is NOT to admit that you are wrong or that the other person is right or that there is no need to vigorously pursue a certain course of action. It simply means that opposition should, until you have reason to do otherwise, be treated in good faith and with the assumption that the other party could have insight that you don't, and that they're acting on information and values that have merit, even if you disagree that those merits justify their views. If two reasonable people could disagree on a topic, it is neither ethical nor productive to unilaterally malign one side or another.

Here's an example of an area where two reasonable people could not disagree: the way that America has historically treated Indigenous people is wrong, and it is wrong to discriminate against them in the present. If someone disagrees with me on that point, I am clued in that there is no productive conversation to be had there unless they drastically change their position.

But two reasonable people could absolutely disagree on the best way to resolve that historical injustice — and other historical injustices — in the present. Is it better to give monetary reparations or land back, or both? How will successful landback movements mesh with current legal frameworks, and is it right to take on the risks of that legal upheaval? What's the most responsible way to ensure that reparation efforts aren't plagued by corruption? Is it right to bomb a pipeline if peaceful protests fail to stop its construction?

Like, I used to think that affirmative action was one of the areas where reasonable people couldn't disagree, but then I read a pretty good article about how affirmative action's underlying legal grounding has been steadily corroded over the years until it now rests far more on the benefits that diversity has for white students than the reparations owed to the historically disenfranchised.

Some of these may be areas I have strong opinions on. But if I meet opposition, I acknowledge that someone's disagreement is coming from a reasonable place, acting on information and values that are, if not Absolutely Right, still compatible with reality and ethics.

I think this is a really important distinction to make in leftist spaces. Something I see far too often is people assuming that, since their position is based on something no reasonable person could disagree with (racism bad, genocide bad, sexism bad, homophobia bad), that means that no reasonable person could disagree with the methods and associated beliefs they've tacked on to their position. And not only is that a very dangerous attitude to take, it's also pretty toxic to coalition building and collective action.

But, honestly, I'm not really involved in activism work, so the main area I use this question is in my personal life. It's a great way for me to step back from personal disagreements and consider: is this really a hill I need to die on, or is this just a disagreement between two reasonable people? It helps me feel assured when I know I need to be assertive, since I know I'm not just reflexively going in guns blazing.

[fincalinde]

nice to see you back on here! if you're answering questions again, i've had something i've been meaning to ask, if you don't mind. do you have any thoughts on the things wwx and jc did for each other?

I'm never truly gone. Whenever you see a fox scurrying about its business in the twilight, I am with you in spirit. By which I mean I'm very busy but I do get a notif if someone sends me an ask.

This one has sat in my drafts for a while and it's still quite messy, but I thought I'd better just get it off the to do list and move on. So, the Twin Heroes!

I've seen quite a bit of negativity towards JC in my time, usually accusing him of all manner of iniquities that aren't actually supported by the text. To make my own position clear: I don't think JC did nothing wrong ever in his life. But I do think he's a capable clan leader and an extremely loyal brother who tried very hard to make things work with WWX.

Let's start with the biggie: WWX gives JC his core. It is an incredible act of love to be sure. Functionally it saves JC's life (he's not going to last long in that state) along with preserving the existence of the Jiang Clan itself. I don't have a problem with WWX making a unilateral decision here, because he knows JC won't agree otherwise and the stakes could not be higher. It also makes sense that the Grandmaster of Impulsive Cultivation conceals the entire thing from JC. He knows the effect the truth will have on JC, and he's just trying to get them through the current crisis and worry about the consequences later. So I think his choices are understandable in a desperate situation where there are no good options.

To be honest, what bothers me is WWX's subsequent dumbassery. My god, man, what is the point of making a monumental sacrifice for someone and then proceeding to fuck shit up for him on a regular basis afterwards?

WWX's behaviour is catastrophic for the Jiang. I understand that he's in his emo goth era and I don't expect him to make perfect decisions at all times, but the way he treads on JC's toes makes my teeth hurt. Quite probably WWX himself was never going to end up in a good place, since his demonic cultivation made him too much of a threat for the Jin (or society at large) to leave him in peace. But that's not particularly relevant to the way he undermines JC. On more than one occasion, JC is doing his best to navigate a delicate political situation and WWX clomps in with his size 13s and makes everything worse for everyone. This, as much as popular sentiment turning against WWX, is a huge driver in why they have to fake their falling out and sever ties publicly.

Meanwhile, JC makes an equivalent sacrifice for WWX—he lets himself be captured, even though it results in the loss of his core and, as far as he knows at the time, the functional extinction of his clan. This is revealed right at the end of MDZS, encouraging the reader to look back at the novel and recontextualise JC's actions throughout. JC put WWX above his own life and the continued existence of his clan. There can be no question that he made as enormous a sacrifice for WWX as WWX made for him. Their mutual ignorance of this fact for so many years is the heart of their tragedy.

But crucially, there remains a difference between WWX and JC. Because JC doesn't only come through for WWX when the stakes are high. Right up until the death of JYL, JC is the one trying to balance his responsibility to his clan with his desire to protect WWX. For a start, they fake the cutting of ties between WWX and the Jiang, when it arguably would be much less risky for JC to cut ties in actuality. JC is also the one taking further risks by allowing WWX to see JYL in her wedding clothes. He even suggests WWX gets to pick her child's courtesy name. These things show a pattern of consideration that WWX simply does not match.

Let's not forget, JC does a decent job as clan leader. He's very young, and unlike NMJ or LXC, he has to build his clan again from literally nothing. Disciples need to be recruited and trained from scratch. Lotus Pier needs to be rebuilt—without Jin gold. He's doing what needs to be done to ensure the Jiang Clan continues to exist, yet still attempting to balance that with his loyalty to WWX even as WWX becomes more and more of a liability. Yes, WWX is being affected by the resentful energy he's cultivating, but his arrogance has been present from the start. It's not that the resentful energy is creating new traits in him, but that existing traits are being exaggerated.

WWX does a lot of very admirable and brave things and he is pretty much always trying to do right by the people he cares about i.e. the Jiang and the Wenmants. The trouble is that he's fundamentally not capable of recognising the damage he's also doing. His altercation with JZX over the soup is one thing—though JC (with JGS) has to pull him off JZX and it makes a bad situation worse, it's an understandable impulse reaction to seeing his beloved shijie being mistreated. But despite the negative consequences of his impulsivity, he never learns to stop and gather more information before reacting (unlike JZX!). He continues to undermine JC by letting the whole world see that he doesn't respect his authority. This really is where I as a reader get stuck: what use is the grand gesture of the core swap when the more everyday consideration is so totally lacking?

I also think it's interesting that in the temple JGY points out to JC that if he'd stuck by WWX, no one could have done anything about it and things might have turned out quite differently. I don't think JGY is being truthful here; or at the very least, if he is being truthful then I don't agree with his assessment. It's a remark intended to goad JC and prod him where he's most sensitive, and it's successful in that regard. I'd be willing to bet that deep down JC does fear that if he'd backed up WWX then everything might have been all right and JZX and JYL would still be alive.

But it's simply not true. WWX's affiliation with the Jiang is catastrophic for them. He openly flouts JC's authority—and of course his demonic cultivation taints the Jiang by association, particularly in light of the Jin smear campaign. WWX's intervention to rescue the Wenmants is the last excuse JGS needs to do what he planned from the beginning: put a target on WWX's back. This isn't a post about whether or not WWX's actions to protect the Wenmants are moral; it's merely an observation that they put JC and the Jiang at risk by association, especially when WWX also deliberately insults the Jin in a public forum. The Jin don't exactly need to work hard to sabotage WWX's reputation: they're merely handing him the rope and he's merrily tying the noose. On a pragmatic level, an actual estrangement rather than a fake one would have been the more better option for JC if his sole priority was the wellbeing of his clan and not also his love for WWX.

On the other hand, if WWX had continued with his demonic cultivation but respected the authority of his clan leader and not undermined him in public, JC might have been more able to effectively protect him. I'm not entirely convinced by that argument, but I certainly find it more plausible than the idea that JC backing WWX would have prevented the consequences of the determined Jin smear campaign.

Essentially, my point is that I'm not splitting hairs about the degree to which JC and WWX love each other. Their love for each other is not in question. Nor is it in question that they have made equally huge sacrifices for each other. But there's the rub. What about the small sacrifices? Who is making those? More often than not, it's JC. JC has the weight of his clan's survival on his shoulders and he still does his best to remain privately loyal to WWX despite the risk it poses to his own position. He only turns on WWX when WWX's actions result in the death of JZX and JYL—JYL being arguably the only person they both love even more than they love each other. (Sorry, LWJ. You only make the leaderboard in Life 2.) Meanwhile, WWX is willing to give up his core for JC but not willing to make the effort to present a united front against political foes who are actively trying to destroy them. He loves JC, but I see no evidence that he respects him.

[this-is-z-art-blog]

Hi, I saw your answer to someone asking about what a Hannuka celebration is usually like and I thought it was really well thought-out and helpful. I was wondering if you might be willing to give me some insight on other Jewish holidays. This was actually inspired by the DP Hannuka challenge. I'm writing a long DP fanfic that's largely from Sam's perspective and when I saw the challenge I thought this was a great time to write some holiday scenes. But when I started researching Hannuka I read that it's not really a major holiday I wanted to know which holidays hold more significant meaning and...well, I went down a rabbit hole and I feel like I HAVE to make sure I do Sam's cultural heritage justice.

The part I'm writing right now takes place in autumn. I wanted to include a little bit about her family celebrating/participating in Rosh Hashana and the ten days of awe. The thing is, I have absolutely no frame of reference; I hadn't even heard of it until a few days ago. Its surprisingly difficult to find descriptions of what exactly people do to observe that holiday besides food. There's plenty to read about the food haha.

I was wondering if you might be willing to share with me your experience with autumn traditions. Your description of Hannuka was so helpful and you seemed open to more questions. But if you're not comfortable please don't feel any pressure, my goal here is to be respectful and I honestly don't know enough about Jewish Culture to know if I'm being rude so please tell me if I am. I live in a predominantly Christian area and the majority of my cultural knowledge on the subject comes from TV which tends to only bring up Judaism when a character talks about Hannuka instead of Christmas so I am basically an uncultured goldfish.

First of all, thank you, and thank you for reaching out. I love talking about this stuff in general, and I especially really enjoy helping people navigate representing characters' Judaism in their works. I know it can be really intimidating to do research on your own- you don't know what questions to ask, or what's a reliable source, or what's unilaterally true vs what varies community to community, and you want to do a good job and not perpetuate something hurtful or harmful- it's a lot! So while I want to be clear I'm just one person speaking from my personal experience and knowledge, Jews are not a monolith and Jewish thought and experience varies a lot, you can always reach out and I'll do my best to help.

Note, the Jewish calendar is lunar, which is about ten days shorter than the solar year, which is why Jewish holidays don't have the same Gregorian date year to year. Every three years (roughly) we have a whole extra 'leap month' to keep the seasons on track, because certain holidays have to be in certain seasons (most notably Passover). Jewish days also begin at sundown and end at about an hour past ('three stars in the sky') the next day, ie Shabbat is Friday evening to Saturday night each week. The high holidays are in the fall, generally, but to know when specifically something is myjewishlearning or chabad are websites you can look up 'what date is [holiday] + [year]'

Rosh Hashanah (literally translated 'head of the year'), New Year's (one of four actually). Kicks off the high holidays, both very joyous and very reflective. Apples and honey is the classic holiday treat, for a sweet new year. Challah for this holiday is often made in a circular shape, for the cycle of the year, rather than the normal Shabbat braided loaves, and sometimes people will make it with cinnamon sugar or raisins for sweetness. You also begin reaching out to make amends to people you may have hurt over the past year, a process that continues throughout the high holidays. A big theme of the high holidays is Teshuva, which is sometimes translated as repentance but is more closely 'return'. It's about making sincere apologies and doing the work to get better and avoid repeating the same kinds of harm. I once texted a non-Jewish friend of mine an apology for a previous fight of ours around this time that for her came kind of out of nowhere, which made her think I was dying. People often have a family meal together. Fun fact, the current Jewish year is 5784. Two days long kinda. Holy

The ten days between Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur, as you flagged, the Days of Awe or Days of Return (or in Hebrew they're the aseret yamei teshuva) are more on this theme of reflection and amends. Many participate sometime in here in a practice called tashlich, where you symbolically release bread crumbs (or some other crumpled foodstuff that may be more suited to your local aquatic life) into the water (typically a river, but sometimes your local Water is a lake or ocean) as a way to release your guilt and regrets and move forward into the new year knowing you've done all you can and you now have a clean slate

Yom Kippur ('day of atonement'), holiest day of the Jewish calendar. One of two major fasts (full day, rather than dawn to dusk). Very thoughtful and contemplative, typically a full day of synagogue services reflecting. We spend most of the day thinking about death. For many communities it's traditional to wear white or to avoid gold. You think about your wrongdoings and how to improve in the coming year, and deeply consider whether you've made your amends and if you've sincerely put in the work to change and improve where you need it.

Sukkot! Rounds off the high holidays, eight day festival that starts five days after Yom Kippur. You build a small structure called a sukkah (you BET there are a hundred specific details) in your yard and take meals in it together, big holiday for guests and visiting. First two and last two days are holy, middle four are still part of the holiday but are more mundane, and you go about your regular life (ie you can use electronics and go to work). Many observe the daily mitzvot of eating something in the sukkah, and shaking the lulav and etrog (a gathering of four plants, the lulav (palm frond), myrtle branch, willow branch are bundled together and the etrog (citron) in your other hand, symbolizes gathering in all the different kinds of our people). At the last days of Sukkot is the holiday Simchat Torah ('the joy of the torah'), where we reach the end of the annual cycle of reading the Torah and begin it anew. VERY joyous and boisterous, big holiday for dancing.

Also, here's an extremely quick and dirty rundown of other the other more prominent Jewish holidays (I'm basically skipping a number of minor fasts and smaller celebrations, but also, hannukkah is on this list, and it is nowhere near the scale of importance as Rosh Hashaha).

Hannukkah. Eight day festival in the winter, lighting a nine branched menorah (the ninth candle lights the others, one more each night ie night one you light one night eight you light eight, once again a THOUSAND little laws and specifics. we are a pedantic people). You have heard of this one

Tu B'Shevat! Late winter/early spring holiday that is the new year for trees. (The name is just the date, the 15th of the month Shevat. Most though not all Jewish holidays are on the 1st or 15th of the month, or, the new or full moon). Big holiday for planting trees or trying new fruits

Purim! Early spring. In a leap year this happens twice (though 'little Purim' is a much smaller holiday). This one is bonkers and criminally underrated. Costumes, giving gifts both to charity and to your friends and family, telling the story of that time a guy tried to kill us all and failed so hard we eat cookies shaped like his stupid hat to this day (hamantaschen or oznei haman, it's just the Yiddish or Hebrew name for them respectively)

Pesach or Passover, you have probably heard of this one. Springtime! Can't eat leavened grains (wheat, spelt, barley, oats, rye) so you gotta clean ALL your stuff out. Most Orthodox Ashkenazim also don't eat 'kitniyot', basically, similar food categories that include nuts, beans, corn, and rice, so if that's your tradition it's pretty thorough. First two nights are the Seder, a large, meandering meal where we tell the story of the holiday (in my family we regularly sit down around seven, don't get to the 'eat the Meal' part until nine, and are at the table til midnight. Many families are a little more effecient but many are even less). First two and last two days are holy, first two days especially are a big time for visiting family

The seven weeks from Passover to Shavuot are a period of time called the Omer, mostly just focused on counting up (not down) the days to Shavout. On the 36th day, Lag B'Omer (name is once again just the day) it's a holiday celebrated largely with bonfire parties

Shavuot (name just means 'weeks', for the seven weeks we count to get here) is the holiday that celebrates receiving the Torah. Celebrated with study of Torah and many have a custom to eat dairy (or just not meat), holy, two days-ish

Tisha B'av is a day of mourning, and the other major fast. Commemorates a lot of various tragedies and traumas. The weeks leading up to it go through a few stages of mourning and mourning practices

Elul is the full month leading up to Rosh Hashanah, and is something of a 'ramp up' to the attitudes and festivities, where you start thinking about your past and coming year

Shabbat. As mentioned this one is every week, holy day of rest from sundown Friday to a little later Saturday. Many celebrate by going to synagogue and/or holding a meal together Friday night and/or Saturday afternoon

Miscellaneous note, safety always comes first. If there is an emergency that would require you to break a rule of the holiday, do it. The principle is called pikuach nefesh, or protection of the soul (life)

Holy days are traditionally (though not everyone observes in this way and specifics vary, it is none of my business, repsonsibility, or interest to tell other Jewish folks what to do) observed by a number of restricitons that I like the categorize as just being part of the world, not trying to create or destory anything within it. The specifics have a lot to do with laws tracing back to not participating in argricultural or textile labor, but most relevant to my life personally is not turning on or off electronics (or fire), and no writing/drawing/fabric crafts.

Again NOT every Jew does full traditional observances of every holiday and that a) is NONE of my or anyone's business b) does not somehow make them 'less' Jewish. Judaism belongs to every Jew and is theirs to decide what to do with. That said, it is a chip on my shoulder when the only Jewish characters I see depicted in media, overwhelmingly written by gentile creators, go over the top to stress how much they hate following Jewish law or how much they love not doing it; feels like people are only interested in having Jewish characters whose Judaism is either a total joke, or it has to be as unobtrusive as possible- which is another reason I try to make myself available to answer questions you might have about how TO include your characters' Judaism