#…i mean yeah technically cuz of that story…

[sunlightfeeling]

Tsuyoshi Chaneru✨

[thinkingrocks]

vox's life: headcannons

im an electrical engineer and i have opinions on this character. moral of the story: don't fuck with CRT capacitors, shits scary

i have a lot of Vox thoughts, or Voughts, and i will be rambling about them at legnth under the cut.

TLDR: he invented zuckerberging. also i see his "canon" death date of 1950s and respectfully disagree. its way funnier if he died the year widespread television became a thing. the fruits of his labor were all for naught etc etc

1928: Vox was in college as an electrical engineer when the first ever live TV Demo happened, and I think he was immediately obsessed with it. Decided he'd do anything to work with TV. He and his friend/roommate at the time went full tilt into learning about TVs and working on them, and by the time they graduated, they had the beginnings of what would be a very profitable company.. together.

1930s: Out of the two of them, Vox has the better social skills(relative), so he's the one who talks to investors and handles that part of the business, though he still works on some tech. He decides he likes talking to people, marketing, manipulating, being a little showman. I like to think this ties into that one trivia fact that he likes watching commercials.

early 1940s: He starts wondering why he's splitting half of this company(HIS company) with some guy who can't even bother to attend business meetings. Tensions start rising, he starts using some of that handy manipulation skill he honed in business on his friends

1945: Tensions break. Through less than legitimate means, he steals the company out from under his partner. His partner threatens to go start his own, since he did the majority of the tech work. We can't have that. Vox doesn't kill him himself, imo, because he is kind of allergic to getting his hands dirty. He revs up that media training and uses it to create a smear campaign so brutal and widespread that his former partner offs himself. Problem solved

Late 1940s: Vox starts getting paranoid about people trying to steal his empire from him, funny that. He starts trying to do everything himself, because he doesn't trust anyone. Starts losing a lot of sleep, getting a little insane but its fine man. Don't worry about it.

1947: Sleep deprived, paranoid, and working on a final prototype model due soon, he electrocutes himself because you shouldn't fuck with CRT capacitors. Wakes up in hell with electricity powers and a CRT head because it's hilarious.

Alastor: Yeah we all know what we're here for. I don't think they ever met in life, but I definitely think Vox knew of him. Alastor was actively broadcasting during the 20s up until his death in 1933, and college student Vox I think listened to a lot of radio while studying and working. I also think in the later years, Alastor was never technically caught as a serial killer, but "hey I think that radio guy was that one killer, cuz he stopped broadcasting right after he stopped killing" was like one of those insane conspiracy statements you'd say to get a laugh at parties, but Vox always secretly kind of believed it, and was VERY vindicated in hell.

I am fully prepared for actual canon to contradict all of this but that's fine because it means they finally had to get season 2 out.

[not-wholly-unheroic]

I remember seeing a bunch of these “what if Hook was the actual hero? The reason he hates Peter Pan? Here are theories that Hook was a Lost Boy?”, when I was younger and it didn’t really make sense.

Okay? Cool? I’m fine with villains having a sympathetic backstory, but not every villain is meant to be some sort of tragic hero.

I may not have read “Peter and Wendy”, but I’m very familiar with most Peter Pan media aside from the Disney originals and Hook doesn’t really need any special reason to hate Peter Pan other than the obvious “That scurvy brat cut off my hand!” I don’t know about everyone else, but I’d certainly hate someone enough to see them as a rival to kill on the spot for something like that.

But overall, Hook is a pirate. Have people conveniently forgotten that pirates would gore, maim, mutilate, and kill people for the fun of it during their whole pillage and ransacking of other ships? If it wasn’t Peter, then it totally would’ve been someone else.

Heck, Smee called Pan’s actions as a “childish prank” and Hook agreed “Aye, but throwing it to the crocodile! That wretched beast liked the taste of me so well, it’s been following me ever since, licking his chops for the rest of me!”

So, it’s not just the hand…although apparently Hook’s gotten used to it. Again, he’s a pirate captain, however and whenever the crew had gotten into Neverland, there’d bound to have been other pirates that they encountered before Peter Pan. It’s the fact that Tic Toc Croc never leaves Hook alone. Now Tic Toc clearly would eat anyone else, but Hook is the main snack of his attention.

It reminds me of that story about a tigress where she literally tracked and stalked a specific hunter.

So yeah, understandably, Hook has a right to be angry. He doesn’t really need any more motivation than that to hate Peter Pan.

I am curious in how and why, cuz I highly doubt Peter’s dagger would be able to chop off a hand in one blow. And I doubt Hook would’ve just been standing around to let someone, let alone a child, do that to him. “Peter Pan” (2003) does a good job in showing the mutilated stump of such an injury.

But I wonder what exactly led up to that point.

I agree with you on the “Hook was a Lost Boy and Peter is actually evil and Hook is trying to save them” trope. It’s been done so many times now and I’m just…very over it. Besides, while it is, I suppose, technically possible Hook could have been a Lost Boy AND an Etonian…it just…doesn’t seem likely to me that he would be both. And most of those retellings just end up leaving Eton out entirely…which…bothers me because it’s a big part of his character. Even if he wasn’t there for long, it clearly left its mark on him with his obsession with “good form.” Also…I like Hook in part BECAUSE he is a villain. I find him fascinating because he is a sympathetic villain with a great deal of potential for redemption. I don’t WANT him to be the hero from the get-go. That fundamentally changes his character and means we don’t get to see the complexities of his emotions and trauma play out as he struggles to BECOME a hero in his own right. Making him the hero from the start just skips over all that and totally ignores canon for both him and Peter. Peter may be a selfish, cocky kid who can be cruel at times…but he’s not some demon child and people need to stop pretending that he is. Like Hook, Peter is a fun character specifically because he is complicated. Don’t turn him into some straight-up villain who is flat and boring and totally unlikable. Barrie pretty clearly meant for us to like both Peter and Hook and have mixed feelings about them. It’s who they are and it’s why his story has stood the test of time—because well-written characters aren’t one-dimensional.

Also…making Hook the hero and Peter the villain completely misses the point… Frankly, the whole issue Peter and Hook have with each other is (ironically) that they BOTH need to do some growing up. In Peter’s case, it’s pretty obvious. He has physically and emotionally stopped aging. Hook may be a grown man, but (and I say this as someone who loves Hook) he is emotionally very immature. He loses his temper easily, holds a grudge against a kid rather than taking responsibility for his part in things as the adult, and generally just doesn’t behave the way a grown-up should. Peter is stunted in his growth, holding on too tightly to his childhood, and Hook grew up too quickly and never really matured as a result. Wendy sees this pretty clearly and finds the balance between maintaining childlike wonder and growing into a respectable, responsible adult. If you make Peter into an often literal inhuman monster and Hook into the perfect hero, then Peter becomes totally incapable of ever choosing to grow up (even just emotionally, if not physically) and Hook doesn’t need to grow anymore because he’s already reached the end goal.

As for how/why things started between them…personally, I think Hook started it. As you said, he IS a pirate, after all. My guess is that he wanted something from the Lost Boys and/or Tink…information about a treasure, perhaps, or even just information about how to get off the island, as in some versions it seems he is trapped there…and Peter saw Hook threatening them and wasn’t having it. The only way I can figure that Peter managed to actually cut the hand off entirely is if Hook had fallen flat on some hard surface (rock?) that had very little to no give and Peter just…dropped like a stone from a great height, letting gravity really do its work and putting all his weight into it. And the only situation where I can see this happening is if Hook had a weapon in his hand that perhaps Peter was trying to knock back. I honestly don’t think it was intentional to cut the hand off. I suspect, knowing Peter’s tendency to make up stories about himself to make him sound more courageous and tough than he actually is, taking the hand clean off was an accident and when he went to pick up the discarded weapon, it was really only then he realized the hand was still attached. He flung it away in disgust and the crocodile just happened to be nearby. When Peter tells the story, though, he changes things up a bit. And Hook is too out of it from the blood loss and pain to really remember all the details so he believes Peter’s version of events that it was an intentional “prank” to cut off the hand and throw it to the crocodile.

[s1llydr3amscape]

Day 5 : Canon Divergence @vanweek2024

Finally talking abt one of my fnaf AU's !!! I try to keep it brief but I cannot simplify for the life off me so yeah have some yapping!! Lots of major stuff and in-between events are not in here but that's what asks are for :] This one is pretty long so buckle up cuz here we go!!!

This au is basically just me taking the fnaf characters and putting them in my oc world!! It started ever since the first FNAF game came out but this story plot started out with Glitchtrap and a few other characters working at an office and shenanigans ensue. When in reality it's a setup because they actually end up killing people and selling off their flesh and pretending that it's organic meat in the market (Like mlp cupcakes + rainbow factory because those were pivotal to my development)

Vanny and all the other workers in a way where technically revived by Glitchtrap as rabbits (Or was already rabbits) making them indebted to Glitchtrap. They can't leave, they have to obey him. Reasons for Glitchtrap needing and starting this business venture is because he needs blood to keep this body I mean his new body alive (Me explaining why they'd have stitching) Because originally Glitchtrap was an entity who took the body of a deceased yellow rabbit and fixed it up enough (like in fnaf sl but this time he just found a fresh corpse) It's rotting the body is failing at this rate, he's going to decay way too fast and he wants to live. (Turning into the black goop like in princess quest)

He paraded as this joyful figure but that's far from the truth obviously. Originally before fnaf sb the body he stole was the father of my own blonde rabbit oc who was dead set on stopping Glitchtrap to let his father's body lay to rest. Even though his father was cruel and left him and his brothers alone, that's the least he can do. He chose to free his body from being mangled worse than it already is because he's a good person I mean better than his father ever was. He doesn’t know if he’s doing it more for himself sometimes.

However, since fnaf sb came out and the movie. I feel like Vanny fits this role better. So yeah to recap Vanny's dad died and Glitchtrap stole his body and made it his own. Vanny knows this later on but she too died in the same vain. Hence, why she ends up having her soul indebted to Glitch as well being the first few workers under him.

At first, she thought she was in hell she's supposed to be dead but she's not and her dad is still here? And he's still the same as ever yet something's not right. He just seems to be acting strange yet it's all too familiar for her.

Vanny ended up posing as a security guard for this residential area. She was tasked to basically infiltrate and blend in so that Glitchtrap had a new source of produce you could say Yet, even after all this Vanny still ended up befriending the Glamrocks. They cared and comforted her even after she wouldn't tell them her sorrows. They were real friends in a way. 

They're nice. In a way.

It felt nice to have friends after moving from area to area to avoid suspicion and ended up making friends. Yet Glitchtrap took this as a sign that she did this for him. Everything she did for herself is for him after all right. Lowering their suspicion on her by being friendly and outgoing, she’s thinking ahead for him. What a good daughter. Making them easier targets if someone were to ever happen to one of these lovely residents. They wouldn't question Vanny now would they! She's just their friendly neighborhood bunny

Her first target was Glamrock Bonnie. It was swift and quick but he put up a fight. Managing to damage one of Vanny’s eyes. The others don't know what happened as the camera feed was seemingly coincidentally cut. Vanny almost didn't make it out and had to leave the body there dead, managing to hide the evidence that she even laid a hand on him. Making it seem like he had fallen down the stairs after a robber tried to mug him. During his funeral, Vanny couldn't even be bothered to look down as he was getting buried. She stood there staring.

She did this.

She was being used as a trojan horse by Glitchtrap to get his supply. She still befriended the others. She shared moments of joy and laughter with them and yet she couldn't help but stare as he was lowered. Glamrock Freddy came to her and cried. This bustling hunk of sunshine weeped at her mercy. She tried comforting him but it left her bittersweet knowing she did this to someone who was nice to her. You’d think she’d be numb at this point but she’s not. 

She never was.

She ended up trying to push them away as the months began to pass. No longer making rounds when she knew they were at home. Deliberately avoiding going to social events and basically just trying to get this job done with. Even when she was doing her rounds and caught sight of the others she answered them rudely or just told them that she was too busy for dilly-dallying.

Roxy tried offering to give her a ride on her bike when she did her rounds but Vanny declined. Chica tried inviting her for lunch but Vanny declined. Freddy tried inviting her over for karaoke but Vanny. Even Monty tried inviting her over to play golf but Vanny declined. 

She's trying to make them hate her. She can't let her dad take them away from her too. She can't. Never again. So she's trying desperately to get them off of his scope so that they wouldn't end up as one of her victims packaged for eating. 

As long as they hate her as long as they don't want anything to do with her they'd be safe. They have to. They don’t need her.

It ended up working for a bit. But Glitchtrap is never satisfied. He never is. Suddenly neighbor after neighbor ended up mysteriously disappearing from this apartment complex. It was more common to see people move in than out and it was happening rapidly.

The residents have asked their landlord for higher security or that they'd move out as even families started going missing. Yet nothing changed. Not a peep gets out here. 

Until one day, Vanny was tasked to kill Freddy. A test by Glitchtrap and she couldn't do it. She tried begging for it to be someone else, anyone but her friend but he didn't like that his worker was testing his patience and took over.

There in the dead of night Vanny broke into Freddy's home. It was a sloppy job. Yet she strutted along. Holding onto the knife with such vigor. Just when she opened the door to his bedroom and tried to take the plunge. She slashed at a child's cheek.

What?

And in that brief moment Vanny regained control and had to face her bearings getting a migraine by the possession by Glitchtrap. She didn't know what was happening until it was too late and the kid fled outside. 

Great.

Basically fnaf sb happened but Freddy was at the pharmacy buying meds leaving Gregory (rabbit) home alone for a few minutes. Vanny, being puppeteered at the time by Glitchtrap, broke in intent on killing Freddy but ended up getting Gregory. Vanny and Glitchtrap didn't and doesn't know Gregory was there or who he was. This was because when Vanny tried to cut off the glamrocks Freddy ended up adopting this kid he found. Hence, why neither party seemed to know about the other because it was quite literally very recent. 

But yeah gist off the AU for now!!! Some parts are being rewritten and whatnot with the ruin DLC and book stuff but yeah!!! Short intro of the AU!!!

Headcanons / Lore :

-Vanny was blonde but ever since her resurrection her furs been turning white unknown if it's because she's technically undead or from stress (I like to think like from blonde bunny with green eyes into those white rabbits with red eyes)

-The workers are some canon fnaf characters and ocs

-Glitchtrap can't mind control Vanny all the time cuz he has other workers he needs to monitor and control, basically spanning a wide network. So he uses fear mongering tactics to get her to obey while he's away.

-Glitchtrap needs the flesh because his body is rotting and he needs pieces constantly to replace it. He only went after rabbits at first but due to his rapid decaying (turning into Burntrap as the story progresses) he went after anything that breathed and lived. I can’t decide if at the end of the story he should turn into Mimic where he’s just a walking skeleton or if he should just permanently die like in the Burntrap ending

-Vanny when she came back had many bald patches on her body after being stitched apart. She's trying to grow out her fur to hide what happened. Just to regain her sense of self. Yet things never change and so she ends up shaving it all off becoming bald like in security breach :[

-She knows that's not her dad but she's still scared of him even though he's much more different than how he was before. Maybe it's the unconditional love of a daughter for her father. Or she doesn’t know what a good parental figure is.

-Glitchtrap originally looked like the black goop version from princess quest, always ever changing, never the same as a being born of malice and hatred. He wanted to be a person like everyone else instead of a blob to be free of it all to start anew but he can't. Unless he acquired a body.

-His workers are only alive after he modified them, giving them life again by giving a part of himself inside off them kinda like a soul contract. Permanent scars literally. (How the enemies in Princess Quest look like rabbit people)

-Workers get sent around areas with dense populations and well acquires inventory from there. Glitchtrap gets money selling the flesh claiming it to be from regular animals. With the money he uses it to keep his body intact and alive. This is to explain how he turns into Burntrap becoming green and nasty.

-Each worker is associated with a smell. Vanny is onion. Glitchtrap is lemongrass. If you look at the sketch Scraptrap’s is garlic. If you’re asking why I did this it is because I just think it’s funny.

-There's more but I feel like I've talked enough!! Currently doing more writing to add ruin into this and trying to do a 2024 redesign for this AU!!! Including Vanny I need to make her more nasty and rotten <33333 

-Also be warned I love bittersweet endings if you fancy this AU

Her stitching and pupils keep switching sides because I couldn't decide 😭 Too embarrassed to show everyone elses design because the start off the story is goofy and the tonal whiplash is killing me. Scraptrap and Glitchtrap cameo tho!!. never realised how squished I made the heads.

I removed the blood due to the fact because being grabbed at the back off your head by an abusive family member still just as scary I should know

[yeehawpim]

What's your process in making comics

And how do you make something so good with such a simple art style!? 🥺

(if this has been asked before could you send a link to the post?)

Alright so ive been sitting on this ask b/c I already know it's a long answer aflskdjf

Write dialogue/text down in my notes app Sometimes it's just me sitting there like hghghg as music plays and I stare at my phone for 10min. Usually it's 12am thinking about stuff while I'm in bed and I type some piece of dialogue down real quick. I'm nowhere near as comprehensive as comic script I've seen online that they give examples for, like there's no direction on what's happening in panels or anyth because it's just for myself and I just sort of remember composition ideas if I have them on the spot

Literally start drawing 😂 As previously said I sometimes go into comics with comp ideas already, like for this one I knew I was going to divide the page going in. Or like I know this is gonna be 4 panels and pretty static. Other stuff I fully wing it sentence to sentence because I can't bother with thumbnailing 😅 sometimes this bites me on the ass because I spend forever drawing smth I have to toss, but I've gotten better at doing stuff fast

I use photoshop, so for vertical comics I've been following this tutorial for years

Vertical comics are a lot easier to structure composition-wise for me, I started out making those because it was less intimidating

The red arrow is your eye direction as you read it. For me it's always the bottom of a page is one less boundary to worry about. You can be less precise if the reader is automatically drawn to looking down b/c they're scrolling and never sees a full page laid out. 😂 Also if I want to pace something slower/further down I don't have to worry about having to cram it in y'know?

This might be a weirdly specific thing to mention but I'm always thinking about it when I make comics because...

lol I gotta make up for being too lazy to spend more than 30 seconds drawing a character

jkjk but yeah my interests are more in slapping the story in my head on the page. I like doing compositions and writing stuff that interests me. I get tired when I spend too much time fiddling with stuff, so if I can get smth across with a rough estimation I'm happy. This does limit the type of stories that can be told cuz certain more rendered styles just work better when you're trying to convey certain things but! there's lots of things you can do drawing simply too!

there's defs more stuff out there that doesn't follow what I'm doing, lots of different styles. Eg American superhero comics are super text-heavy and boggle my mind. This is just what I like to do cuz I like reading way too much manga/webtoons lol

you don't have to be super technical to make comics! go out there and make one if you've got an idea!

if you want to of course haha

hope this explains my process a little (thank you for the compliment it means a lot 🤠🙏)

[britcision]

Alright, it’s time to talk about Lycion and dysmorphia and being a trans allegory

Because… yeah, I think a lot of people can really relate to being scared of mirrors because you hate everything you see in them, and going to extreme lengths to get a body you love

It’s not a complicated allegory

But, and I think this is pretty important and possibly more useful to the trans community than declaring him ours and trans… dysmorphia and dysphoria are not exclusive to trans people

They’re not even particularly related to any part of the body; it can be any part of it

And like 15 years ago when I was learning about trans issues and shit, I went and did a little research, because I eat knowledge. And y’know what fully settled any questions I had?

Found a case about a lady with what is currently being called body integrity/identity disorder, which is basically dysmorphia so severe that people have otherwise healthy limbs amputated to be able to live life in a body they can stand

This lady got both legs fully amputated, got a wheelchair, and became a pillar of her community where before she was almost bed bound

And y’know what, if that’s a thing that can happen and we can all agree that removing her legs was integral to her health, y’know what seems completely trivial by comparison?

Every gender affirming surgery ever

And y’know what is even more trivial?

All the other transition measures that have nothing to do with surgery, like hormones, puberty blockers, and social transitioning

Being trans has become a super political idea for basically no reason whatsoever, but it’s harder to maintain that ideology if you learn about things like dysphoria and dysmorphia as just medical conditions that absolutely anyone can get, and then look at what that means for gender dysphoria

Cuz if peoples’ brains can decide an entire limb has Got To Go then yeah, they’re probably also capable of deciding “that pronoun is Wrong” and we can take that just as seriously; it’s a much easier fix and also free

Basically I’m saying Lycion is our gateway drug cuz if you can understand this elf hates his body so hard he became a werewolf about it, are you really gonna throw a fit over someone getting a packer?

None of this to say you can’t or shouldn’t headcanon him as trans (and unless it comes directly and unambiguously from Ryoko Kui it’s a headcanon, nothing wrong with that it’s what fanon is for)

Just, y’know. Sound folks out on him without mentioning that part right away for your own safety and possibly entertainment ��👉👉

Oh and super important: he’s not canonically cis either. Pretty sure it was just never specified. Enjoy and apply this knowledge across every character ever whose assigned birth gender isn’t brought up in canon

The thing Lycion definitely is in canon is a goddamn furry and an otherkin allegory, and arrested for awoo crimes. He’s one of only 5 characters in the Adventurer’s Bible with a stated gender (the others being Otta, Kaka, Kiki, and Inutade - everyone else has pronouns but no gendered nouns in English at least)

(Lycion’s “definitely a man” - or “definitely male” in the official translation, which technically excludes him from the gendered committee altogether)

You are, of course, welcome to disregard canon in all things you do - I personally encourage it, it’s much more fun to play in the space and do your own thing, and Dunmeshi has deliciously efficient story telling; there is so much empty space to play in

[wiktorianala]

My oc's + characters they were based of in one way or another

I got bored of sewing, maybe gonna continue on weekend, but anyway i decided that it's time to make smthng more with Bouney 'n Handy so there's a lil drawings and if someone is interested in me yapping about them, story, 'n other stuffs then click here \/

Oki, so I'll start with at which point they were based of well, Salad and Madotsuki. Starting from Handy because this will take me less time. She was created waaay later, at moment when I wanted to start working on comic, so I had to make second character just so Bouney wouldn't be only one, well i wanted to make her an object head of some kind to match with the fact that Bouney's head was created out of rotated eye. It is not anymore but that was honestly how I created this little freak. Fine but coming back to topic I wanted to give her some kind of object, and I'm honestly shit when it come to making any decisions myself, so with my friend we just looked throught my entire sketchbook and we found drawing of Madotsuki with hand palm effect (because I was pretty much fixated over this game and bigger part of sketchbook had Yume Nikki drawings), so we just picked hand. Now, with Bouney it's longer story, just like I said, I created him way earlier, so first thing he got after Salad were simple plain clothes 'cuz I'm layzy and absolutelly didn't wanted to bother with drawing anything complicated over and over again (and I picked Salad, because once again, yes it was my fixation at that time, and I want to remind that thos are two different times btw). So at the point when I wanted to start making thos comics and when I already had character designs I had to give them personalities and story, and the story... it was pretty different from what it is now. First vershion of it was too about a empty world and all thos stuffs, this didn't change, but main difference was the fact that in earlier ver Bouney was only living creature in this world. Handy was more of some kind of imaginary friend that appeared in his head due to loneliness there. (this a bit was based out of Salad too, because, ya know, empty weird world, clearly not very sane main creature character 'n thos stuffs) Plot mostly was just like in current vershion pretty goofy 'n just some "everyday stuffs", but at some points it was getting pretty heavy and sad. AND YES I KNOW THAT IT SOUNDED MUCH MORE INTERESTING, honestly at some point even I liked it more in this way, but there were two main reasons why I changed it. First one, fact that Handy wasn't really a physical person caused some technical writing issues that maybe been not that hard to fix, but as once already I said- I'm layzy, so I didn't wanted to be bothered by them. And now second and honestly more important reason (at least for me), it was time when I was making 2nd re-write of "Fragments of Sanity" plot (rn I'm working on 3rd, and I hope last one, because I want to finally make it into comic too) and I mean first version of it was pretty, well sad (I can't really find better word for it), but on second version? Oh boy, let me tell ya this shit is even worse (and main reason for this is probably because I dunno when but Mike ended up being at least in his personality and behavior (not by plot) a bit of self insert). So I didn't really wanted both of my projects to be like that, and I wantd at least one of them to be one with wich I could more goof around, so yeah, I've changed it. Well I guess that's all I wanted to say? I dunno. I know that in 95% no one is about to read this, but anyway I feel at least better when I can yap somewhere about some certain stuffs, and hey, ain't that for what blogs even exist? For people to yap, and do stuffs they like? Damn after writing for such a long time about them I guess I have a need rn to finish this god damned 3rd chapter. So yeah, now that's all.

[littlestkoi-n]

a much too whiny rant about fic icks

I die a little every time pup, cub or Prongslet comes up in a wolfstar raising Harry (together or separately) fic. especially cub - it makes literally no sense????? are you sure it's Remus John Lupin I'm reading about??? it's his evil doppelganger, I'm telling you. I'm not even sure I could stomach that word ironically.

Prongslet is fine in moderation, I guess, but only as an inside joke, only coming from Sirius and only when Harry's a smol bean. but when it's Prisoner of Azkaban compliant I wanna claw my eyes out.

it's even worse when those terms are used not just in dialogue but in Remus or Sirius' internal monologue as if pup and cub are Harry's freaking pronouns or something. my cub, my pup, cub did this, pup did that... just call him boy or kid or his name for god's sake. I once saw sprog pop up and was delighted cuz at least it's actually british slang.

and don't get me started on Hadrian(us) James Orion Potter-Black (which is just... why the fuck would James give his son the name of his best mate's horrible father AND the last name of his horrible family?? and why would Lily agree to that?) who's simultaneously Lord Potter, Black, Peverell and Slytherin (and, sure, I have a visceral reaction to aristocracy wank in general but even ignoring that - the last 3 literally make no sense since "Lord Black" is Sirius until his death; and both Peverell and Slytherin lines bled into other families ages ago. so being a Potter automatically means you're descended from Peverells as well as being a Gaunt - from Slytherin. and the last of those is Tom Riddle Jr. but that wouldn't make any Potters "Lord Peverell"s or any Gaunts/Riddle "Lord Slytherin"s. those last names are dead. smh).

but, uh, this tangent technically has nothing to do with my initial complaints, it's just that at some point I started thinking of this naming stuff in tandem with nonsensical nicknames as they began appearing in fics together. which is a double homicide, truly.

and look, I definitely understand the desire to make Harry's original name something else cuz it fits nicely with POC Potters headcanon and Dursleys being racist dicks about it, but... Hadrian? I mean, it's not really a big deal when the fic mentions it being his full name but both narration and characters still refer to him as Harry for short - that makes total sense. however when after the name reveal Hadrian replaces Harry completely, it feels super weird and uncanny, making it hard to identify Harry's character in the story altogether.

although I guess you should all knock me off my high horse for being the biggest hypocrite ever, cuz I myself have a headcanon for Harry's name, even if it's less elaborate than Hadrian. also less Roman? that's another thing I don't get - if you want to create a better connection between Harry and his roots, why choose a name of a Roman emperor for a desi kid? since he's usually explicitly desi in all the Hadrian fics. so it's not that I have a problem with renaming him, per se, I just don't understand the choice of Hadrian.

for example, I recently read a fic where he was Pakistani and his name was originally Hami, which is a nice idea, actually, and makes sense for such headcanon. mine is Hari btw (हरि in Sanskrit), since I headcanon Potters as Indian, but I didn't come up with that name myself - just saw it somewhere a couple years ago and liked it. I think it's actually a pretty popular hc now? anyway, it's closer to Harry than any other name I've seen and has many beautiful meanings that resonate with what I think James and Lily felt towards their son. now, even though I still prefer his name being Harry regardless of ethnicity, I do entertain this silly headcanon from time to time - so yeah, I'm one to talk, boo me.

now, I probably should shut up since this rant has been entirely too negative already, but while I'm on the topic of icky names/nicknames I should circle back to wolfstar cuz gods know I'll never be brave enough to talk about this particular pet peeve in its own post.

Siri, Remu and Remy make my blood boil. Siri could be kinda cute when it's a silly childhood nickname from Regulus, but if any marauder or Lily calls Sirius that - immediate death. Si and Re are a teensy bit better in moderation and if used ironically, but still stab me in the chest. a couple times for good measure. the only somewhat acceptable short form of any of their two names for me is Rem, albeit with a stretch and only because it's an actual version of the name Remus in Catalan and Russian. I know I'm being way too dramatic about this (just like with all of my previous points) but I just don't understand the need to shorten their names. at all. they're only 3 and 2 syllables long and so mystical on their own that any shortening just makes them simultaneously more nonsensical and less remarkable.

both characters literally have established quirky nicknames in canon that you can play with and even shorten to Pads and Moons if you want. Sirius is not a digital assistant and Remus is not the main character from Ratatouille. stop this madness.

plus James is right there. his name has a ridiculous amount of diminutives - Jamie, Jimmy, Jim, Jam, Jem, Jay and even Jimbo if you're into that. why strip Remus and Sirius' magical names of their charm if you can have fun with common names? but I digress.

at the end of the day, my pet peeves are mine only and I should live with them in fragile peace. this post is a personal rant first and foremost and if you disagree, I'm genuinely happy that you enjoy the things I can't. fandom is a playground and we can all find some fun in different corners. I'd also like to point out that I'm not trying to take a jab at fic writers who use any of the aforementioned terms, names or diminutives. I'm only one person, so if I stop reading your work because of my petty biases, it's only my loss and not your problem. hundreds of other fans will enjoy it instead. so keep doing what you love and writing those characters however you want, it's your right!

so yeah, writers and readers - don't take it personally and have your fun! don't listen to me being mean! I'm just making my fandom experience way too convoluted for my own good.

[randomlywanderingmoth]

FANSERVANT: Caster of Blessings

(picture created in picrew)

SERVANT CLASS: "Are- are you seriously asking that? Go back up the header and read that again." ALTERNATIVE NAMES: Kat. "Kat for the English speakers. Phonetically sounds like Cat. Yes I'm human, these are just a funny blessing." Neko-chan. "Neko-chan for the Japanese speakers, cuz Neko means Cat, heheh." Emma. "Wait, how the heck do you know that? I mean- it IS my name, and I don't mind you using it, but… that's the name of my Pseudo half… I mean, I guess if you're referring to the very normal human me, then that's fine I guess?"

TRUE NAME: "- woah woah woah hold on a hot minute here, I was gonna do a whole song and dance! Lemme have this!" True Name information presently sealed. "Thank you, dossier."

===

"Anyway, let's rip the band-aid off now, I'm a Pseudo-Servant. To make an extraordinarily long story short, I was a Master in a Grail War, and Caster was my Servant. A whole buncha buncha stuff happened, and I ended up inheriting her Saint Graph. Obviously, I didn't have the cat-ears or cat-tail prior to inheriting my Saint Graph. Don't worry about them too much."

"Oh- oh right, I should give a long-form description of what my deal is. Anyway, I'm the Caster of Blessings. I was gonna be cagey and tell you to call me Kat, but since the dossier blew my cover yeah you can call me Emma. I'm a hedge mage- was a hedge mage- that got tangled up in a Grail War. I ended up summoning the original Caster of Blessings, the one that wouldn't have been a Pseudo-Servant. We bonded, as people do, and I learned that she… didn't exactly like being the Caster of Blessings. It almost didn't matter, except that it turned out I was also compatible to hold that Saint Graph."

"Anyway, at one point… well, my memories are a jumble. I blame either the Throne or the Kaleidoscope, maybe both, but either she gave it to me after taking a fatal wound to let me keep being in the Grail War because she found my wish beautiful, or I took a fatal wound and she sacrificed her life to infuse me with her Saint Graph so I could survive, or I ended up waking up to my own potential as a Mage and we won the Grail and her half of the wishes on the Grail was to let go of her Saint Graph and it peeled off her and stuck to me… I'm rambling, sorry. Presumably, every path in the Kaleidoscope that lead to me becoming the Pseudo-Servant holding her Saint Graph merged, hence my jumbled memories. Presumably there's also memories in there of me being the Caster of Blessings that I summoned, but I'm thankful to be deprived of those memories in this summoning- I don't need that existential recursive headache, please and thanks."

"As the bearer of her Saint Graph, I incidentally also inherited her memories. And, lemme tell ya, I get why she wanted to leave. How many years, decades, centuries, millennia, do you think you could spend, trying to help people? How long can you work, in- I was gonna say in a Sisyphean effort, but even Sisyphus would object to this. I remembered all of it. All the effort, to try to help Humanity. To fix the mess I made- er, she made. Erm- disregard that."

"Anyway, as the Caster of Blessings, her job was as the name implies. To travel the world, to impart blessings unto humanity. To help fix the problems of the people, then to flee when they learned those problems were, on some level, her fault in the first place. Before you ask, no, her legend will never make mention of any of this, I wouldn't be saying it all if I thought it would."

"Anyway, she traveled, as you do, blessed people, as she could, and learned that… well, it's remarkably difficult to permanently quash the darker natures of humanity. She would say impossible, but I've a pedantic mindset to say it technically isn't impossible. But anyway. To give humans wealth is to invite greed, to give them talent is to rouse envy. Attempting to reconcile conflict only planted grudges to incite further outrage. Perhaps none of those in the moment, but given time, good things seem reluctant to ever last. The apple will always find its way to rot in the end."

"Eventually, she gave up. Because of course she did. Because you can say that, after seeing every attempt to help people crumble and fail, you would still keep trying, but immortality does not typically include immortal determination and willpower. Those are still very mortal, and, trust me, after thousands of years your resolve would also falter."

"One day, though, she met someone. Or, someone met her… the memories are difficult here. That someone didn't want to be remembered, if I had to guess- but anyway. They suggested a simple idea to her. The living person can retire, and her ever unending self-appointed task can be left to her memories. Engrave her existence on the Throne of Heroes."

"… she had the tiniest sliver of resolve left, and it was enough to do this final deed. To leave her task to a Saint Graph. But the Ghost Liner who held that Saint Graph, for a time, was her. Her memories, given form. Still uncontent. Still left to meekly tend the ever-turning nature of humanity."

"And then she was summoned to a silly Grail War by a silly girl with silly aspirations that were barely alive. And that silly girl wanted… so many things. And the Caster of Blessings had one more blessing that she hadn't ever given before, not in this way."

"And so, the original Caster of Blessings took her final retirement, and her erstwhile Master was stepped up to the line. The Pseudo-Servant, Caster of Blessings. That's me."

PARAMETERS:

Strength: E+ "… what's with that look? I'm a Caster. Base STR is what you get." Endurance: D+ "Wow, even as a Caster I have better than base Endurance. Neat." Agility: C+ "I know I have cat motifs going on but I am also a Caster. Be glad you got this." Mana: A+ "Don't be fooled, I can actually blow through my mana supply in a real hurry if I mismanage it." Luck: B- "My luck is actually pretty okay. That malus? I have a faint-but-constant urge to Test My Luck, and you don't need a bad luck streak to get screwed over, you just need one really bad hit." Noble Phantasm: EX "Okay so we can get back to this if I ever I pull out my True Name but even without it, the Noble Phantasm that I DO make regular use of is also still EX rank. It's pretty buckwild."

SKILLS:

"Now, disclaimer, I'm not giving you the proper names of my Skills. Those are sealed up along with my True Name. Don't worry, you'll still get an idea of my deal from the listed."

Item Construction (B+ Rank): "My primary Magecraft allows me to command, manipulate, and reinforce thread and fabric essentially at will. You'd be surprised how strong and durable cotton yarn is when reinforced by such high level Magecraft. It's a point of note, I can't just use straight fabric like shirts or jackets, but if I can unravel the yarn from like a scarf, I always have a weapon. And yes, the stuff I make is quantifiably powerful. Cool magic swords and axes, suits of armor? As long as I have enough thread, sure. The original Caster of Blessings was a lot more deft with this, but I'm capable enough in my own right."

Territory Creation (A- Rank): "I'm also able to delineate and define a 'home' territory, making it my Workshop- and it's a pretty ridiculously powerful Workshop at that, Temple-grade. The only issue, aside from the ritual to delineate that Temple, is that I can only denote one 'home' at a time. Make a new one? Old one stops being a Temple. Pretty sure there's some mythology somewhere about cats being protectors of homes. That's my excuse for now, anyway."

Presence Concealment (B+ Rank): "Ever seen a cat get sneaky? Yeah, I can do that pretty good. What's funny is, even if I get into a fight, if I just put a bit of mana into maintaining my concealment, I don't lose ranks after entering combat like standard Presence Concealment! Ever tried fighting someone your mind refuses to stick to? It's buckwild."

Golden Rule (C Rank): "Ah, erm… quick come up with something- right, y'know those Japanese lucky cats? Maneki-Neko? Sure, this is totally based on that. Anyway, it's not that I have cash, it's that I have, let's say, a remarkable talent for falling into wealth as needed."

Natural Body (A Rank): "Neat, huh? I get pluses to my STR, END, and AGI stats cuz of this, and my body is way more fit than it was when I was alive! Bonus, hostile effects that would negatively impact those stats don't work unless they can bypass this skill! No half measures were taken in the creation of the Caster of Blessings, and that sure as heck is reflected in this skill!"

Clairvoyance (A- Rank): "A byproduct of my Noble Phantasm, my eyes can even theoretically perceive the future if I try! The, uh, the minus is because… I'll take the blame on this, pretty sure original Caster never had this problem, but I'm not as good at controlling it. I can restrain it, and I can use Mystic Eye Killers on it to basically turn it off so it isn't quite so distracting, but… I'll be honest, I give full props to all the Servants who can use a skill like this on the fly, no problem. Clairvoyance is not nearly the free win that I used to think it was."

Divinity (B Rank): "Oh if I didn't have this it'd be real freakin' funny when I started passing around blessings like candy. The only reason I'm not A Rank is because my Saint Graph doesn't make it to god level, and both the original and I take serious umbrage with that. I mean, after everything she's done, hasn't she earned the right to return to- ah, sorry, nearly spilled the beans there, eheheh."

NOBLE PHANTASM:

Fatal Curiosity: Mystic Eyes of Observation

"Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back. That's the whole phrase, by the way. Bet you've only heard the first half, heheh."

"Anyway, my eyes are capable of completely deconstructing the information presented to it in nearly any situation. A single glance and I can fully discern anything about anyone. Presence Concealment, True Name Concealment, Illusions, and similar effects basically mean nothing to me. I can read off nearly everything about any Servant or similar hostile in a matter of seconds. True Name, Parameters, Favorite Ice Cream Flavor, Skills, Fears and Weaknesses, Noble Phantasms, so on and so forth. It's a matter of seconds and not instantly because I need a bit to process and filter out the junk data from the tasty stuff, but the more mana I pump into it the faster the processing goes. At full power, yeah, it's basically instant."

"Speaking of stuff I can process instantly, the moment I see any sort of hostile action- an attack, a directed curse, a trap, or so on, my Mystic Eyes will instantly process and provide autonomous countermeasures. Oh, and bonus? If it's Magecraft, my Eyes will reverse-engineer it basically automatically. As in, if I see Magecraft used, I can use it too. Sadly, I can't take the information from previous summonings, and it's only the information of my Pseudo-Servant self, so I don't have all of humanity's Magecraft at my fingertips, but it's still a whole lotta lot to work with."

"Oh- that all does take a bit of a toll on mana, but even at rest my Eyes are constantly processing information- just at a slower rate than near-instant. At rest I could tell you the weak spots in the local construction or geography, I could autonomously counter minor Magecraft, I can even read minds. Or- rather, I have to. The Eyes never fully power down. It's… rather distracting at times, so I wear the glasses to turn it off when it's not needed."

"No secrets, no deceptions, nothing may be hidden from my eyes. Let us bear witness, together, to what happens next- FATAL CURIOSITY."

[infinite-ticking-clock37]

Help why is Silved mpreg a new thing on this app- like what started this help me

OH BOY how the fuck do I explain this shit

Ok so basically back in very early January I decided to draw Silver Spoon.. but pregnant. AS A JOKE-

Then my gf (@humanaltarr) posted the pic, and a few of my moots on Tumblr saw it, and at first I was like "Welp this is the end of my Tumblr career" and I think just a few hours later one of my moots (@spiritmander13) wrote the first Silver Spoon mpreg fic called "Silver Suffers With Morning Sickness" with 6 chapters (technically 7 but the 7th isn't involved with the story)

Then Silver Spoon mpreg became a big joke mostly on the oscc discord I believe (I joined it for a few days but left) and then for a while it was quiet, until I started an ask blog called @askthe-iii-shipchildren, on April 5th, and on April 30th I got an ask by an anonymous person where they wanted Candelabra to put Silver Spoon in a maid dress, and I ended up drawing Silver in a maid dress

Now here's were the second Silver mpreg era began. I made a joke with Candle saying "If Silver stays in that for much longer Candelabra is gonna have a little sibling soon" cuz I thought it would be funny (had no idea what it would cause)

Then @spiritmander13 reblogged it and said something like "CANDLE NO-" and I replied back saying "Silver Spoon mpreg part 2 /j" AS A JOKE. She told me not to start it again, and I said "Aw shucks" but in the tags of that reblog, I said "Time to draw Silver pregnant in a maid dress" and that's where I messed up since Spiritmander said they were intimidated.

Suddenly, I got tagged in a post by Spiritmander, and it seemed to be a screenshot of them saying "Don't tell Infinite, my sins shall stay hidden until it is the right time (I scrolled for like 20 minutes on their blog to find that fucking hell)

Then I got a little spooked cuz yk it's not everyday shit like this happens. I then screenshotted it and went into her inbox with the screenshot and asked "WHAT IS RHIS, WHAT DOES THIS MEAN" and she replied with another screenshot and it said "*Casually steals Tumblr mutuals fankid for the story*" and that's when I knew what was happening.

Soon, Spiritmander posted another Silver Spoon mpreg fic called "Little Moth"

Then it was a little quiet after that, with me making an occasional joke about it, always ending it with Spirit saying "HEY YOU STARTED IT!"

There is also this whole thing with "Bab Incest" Spirit did but I wasn't involved with that

Later in to May, me, @spiritmander13 and @mxmc13 formed the "Silver Spoon simp trio" cause apparently we all saw each other as friends so why not

Then the (sort of) mpreg era 3 started again. I'll put this part simply and say that me and a few other people on osc Tumblr got asks in our inboxes by "Anon~Chan" that were basically like a shitty Wattpad story but with II characters, and I personally got a Silverloon mpreg thing.. so fun..

And the most recent thing that happened. There was a Two x Jax post, and me, Mc, and Spirit were basically joking more about Silver Spoon mpreg in the reblogs, until Spirit came along and said "Silver Spoon simp trio canceled." And me and Mc were absolutely DEVASTATED and then Spirit said that me and Mc had to write Silver Spoon mpreg as well, for me as punishment for drawing it and confusing the original poster, and for Mc.. dunno..

And that's what's currently happening, I am working on my Silver mpreg and so is @mxmc13 ..

And yeah that's the whole story pretty much, this was a VERY long post and probably not even was the asker really wanted but meh

Anyways I imma end this off with saying.. I do not regret first drawing the Silver Spoon mpreg, since this is all genuinely fun and it even got me some friends on this site (Spiritmander and Mxmx and their great) so yeah =]

(also this is NO hate to anyone mentioned in this, and the fics that Spirit wrote are actually really good so I recommend checking them out)

[thr-333]

In other news- because tbh this other au holds more meaning in my heart (just cuz of how I relate to Donnie the most out of all of the aus), I genuinely am craving for angst with hurt/comfort for Leo Jr au.

sooo time for THOUGHTS I really am longing for moments with Leo Jr and Donnie, because...hnk- Donnie actually receiving comfort, care, patient understanding and acceptance instead of being told to suck it up or being ridiculed/treated like a ticking time bomb???? Means the world to me????? Idk- I guess my soul just aches for this version of Donnie who didn't get that safe space Leonardo's Donnie did. (i get the au is mainly Leo-centric, but for some reason this version of Don-tron ya created has somehow wormed his way into my heart and he is truly my favorite iteration in terms of aus???)

When I tell you that I felt my heart break over the silly comic where Leonardo says that Leo Jr and Casey Jr are twins, solely due to what that implies to the overall story. In a sense, Leo Jr gets to have variations of the life he would have if he hadn't been kidnapped (by all technicalities Leo Jr IS a victim of kidnapping no matter how wholesome it turned out to be). He gets to know the joys of having a twin, of being able to goof around and laugh, being understood/accepted, being able to make friends and be a kid! Meanwhile...Donnie (the one who was MEANT to have Leo as his twin) didn't get any of that. It hit hard that, even if it wasn't intentional by any means, Don was "easily replaced." (which idk if it's intentional or not, but that seems to be a reoccurring theme for the spiny softshell in this au). He'll never really have that close knit bond, not know what it's like, even if Leo Jr and him do grow close during their teenage years. Because in this reality, the "Disaster Twins" exist, Donnie's just not apart of it. Which is just another way that shows how much of a stranger the kid is to everyone who is supposed to be his family; his father, two brothers, and even the one who was at one point meant to be his twin.

That thought is sorta what led me down the rabbit hole of Leo Jr AU! Don brainrot. The kid's reality is one of neglect, extreme isolation, fear and...probably a deep well of self-hatred, loneliness, non existent self-worth, etc. (we saw how he struggled with in Rise Canon, so i can only imagine it is so much worse in this au). I can only imagine that this also impacts his ninpo and mystics later on, which probably is going to make his self-esteem take a nosedive.

Ngl if Leonardo's twin (who I'm gonna call Tello) is actually watching over his past self, it makes me wonder what he's thinking. His pov would be intriguing consider he'd be witnessing how much pain his twin's actions caused. Idk- I just- when I look at everything from this particular au, it makes me hope that Donnie is allowed to feel his big feelings without people trying to rush him. He should be allowed to be terrified, hurt, angry, etc towards Splinter and Leonardo. Neither of them deserve his forgiveness, because shit- both of them fucked up big time. They both caused complex trauma...and like- really need to face consequences. (apart of me sorta hopes Donnie DOESN'T forgive them) dakjsfsadfas sorry for rambling, not sure if any of that made sense, but I just- I have so many feelings about Donnie in the Leo Jr au, and really want to see more of him!

The sewers were a gross place to live if you asked Junior but Splinter refused to move to the hidden city. Luckily he had his portals meaning he could step into the already cleaned portion they called a home.

“Leo!” Mikey was the first to notice him. Dropping the plates on the table he was setting them vaulting over it, “You came!”

“It’s still Junior,” He reminded for the umpteenth time, “And yeah I said I would,”

Mikey collided into him for a hug. Junior gave a small wave to Raph- or Red, probably Red as the snapper wasn’t meeting his eyes while trying to hide his scowl. Splinter was setting the table in Mikeys stead, making wayyy too much eye contact as he kept staring at Junior. He was placing the plates down carelessly. The one in front of Donnie was placed down with a crack, only Junior caught his flinch.

“Great, he’s here, I saw him,” Donnie pushed away from the table in a frenzied movement, “Can I please leave now,”

“Purple your brother is here, that is more important than some computer,” Splinter snapped. No one took note of the way both Donnie and Junior cringed. 

“Nah he’s just tryna get out of showing me his lab since he promised last time,” Junior stepped forward and away from Mikey.

“I did no such thing,” Donnie scowled at him as Junior came around to his side,

“No use backing out now Dee,” Junior grinned, shuffling towards Donnie so the softshell backed away. Kind of like herding a very liable to bite sheep, “I’m expecting the grand tour, don't wait up everyone! “

But dinner…” Junior pretended he didn’t hear Mikey as he walked Donnie towards his room office lab space.

It was empty, with sections obviously organized out to put things there but with not enough actual stuff to do it. Donnie held himself like a tightly drawn string as they walked in. Not looking at Junior as the red slider circled around to the other's bed.

“What did you want to see?” Donnie asked tiredly as Junior came up behind him, “Most of my stuff is at the old place, or the other old place, or-”

Donnie was cut off by the blanket being draped over his head like a tablecloth.

“Nothing much,” Junior shrugged stepping away as Donnie went very still under the blanket, “Just had to get out of there, think I might sit quietly against a wall for the next half hour, not say anything, not do anything, you know how it is,”

Junior slid down the wall. He would have to go back eventually, or the others would break down the door and pull them both back to dinner. He estimated he had about thirty six minutes before that happened and that he could convince them to leave Donnie be. He’d say he asked if the softshell could make something for him. Something big so Donnie would have an excuse to disappear for the next week or so. They tended not to bother the other turtle as much if they thought he was doing stuff for the yokai.

The blanket shuffled, bunching up on the ground as Donnie sat near him. Only just within arms reach. He was covered head to toe, curled up and completely silent. Junior occupied himself trying to come up with a believable project. Maybe a new mask? That way he could wear his old one and the others would never know, it’s not like Splinter ever let them follow Junior to the battle nexus.

The blanket shifted but Donnie didn’t emerge. A hand poked out the bottom, listing up the cloth and bunching it up while still keeping the soft shell hidden. Junior reached his hand out halfway. Donnie couldn't see it but paused when his searching hand brushed up against it. Junior kept still, waiting, not minding one way or the other.

Donnie held his fingers, squeezing lightly. Junior squeezed back, not taking Donnie’s whole hand but meeting him where he was. It was pleasant, it was quiet. The noise from the others blocked off. A little bubble away from everything where they could just be. 

Junior thought growing up in the sewers may have not been all bad… if he got to do it with Donnie.

[cawdra]

Good question, @avvielalame-blog

GATHER 'ROUND, FOR I HAVE A STORY TO TELL ABOUT MY WEIRD HOSPITAL OPIOID TRIP THAT MADE ME HALLUCINATE NEW GOOD OMENS EPISODES:

Last year I went to the hospital. It was some cyst (idk the medical lingo), and it was painful af. They gave me some sort of strong opioid (again, no idea what the medical lingo is, but I think it was Buprensomethingsomething). Mind you, I was on antidepressants and anti-anxiety meds, but I hadn't taken them for almost a week, cuz I couldn't get out of my bed the whole time (before I eventually went to the hospital). I told them I was off that medication, and because the prescription is pretty old, they gave me the painkillers. TURNS OUT THE FUCKING MEDS WERE NOT OUT OF MY SYSTEM YET!!! So uhhh... yeah.

(If you don't know, mixing these two things can be very dangerous because they can raise dopamine levels too high or something, which is INCREDIBLY DANGEROUS!!! I'm a pretty large person, so this didn't hit me that hard (and also I was off the meds for longer than 24 hours), but if I was slightly less of a fatass and more of a responsible medicine taker, I might have actually been comatosed.)

Anyway, I was riding high that night. I didn't have anything else to do, so after seeing a good omens edit, my first thought was, "That seems gay. I'm in." So I turned on Prime and watched it all in one night. It's not like I was going to sleep in a ward full of screaming people anyway, so might as well make the most of it. The nurses told me to sleep, but I told them I wasn't sleepy, so they just gave me my antibiotics and, whatever else, took my temp and walked out. Did they care about the gay shit I was watching on my phone? No, they've seen worse.

Anyway, I watched the show, ugly cried for like an hour (harder than I did from the cyst that was torturing me for about a week), and then went to sleep at around 2 pm. When I woke up, I, as a responsible queer, decided to rant about it to my friends. After telling them all those things, one of my friends (who actually watched the show with his sister) said, "Are you sure the anesthesia didn't scramble your brain, cuz none of that happened lol."

When I tell you I was DEVISTATED!!! Literally a "You... you serious?" moment. Cried almost as much as I did at the ending.

Also, if you want to know: I had a dream about how the Ineffable Husbands teamed up with some nun (who was as much of a nun as she was a saint - only on a technicality) and they made her carry the Second Coming, which eventually got her kicked off the nunnery of whatever cuz 'These days, if you get pregnant as a nun, you won't be called ‘The Virgin Sarah’ or ‘The Virgin Linda’. You will be called ‘a common whore’. So much for being a virgin.' (Quote from my fanfic (and the weird opioid trip).

I don't know what the rest of the dream was because Mr. Party Pooper (aka my friend JK Juno ily (^з^)-☆) cut me off because I was talking nonsense.

Long story short, the painkillers got out of my system, I took my meds, renewed the prescription, and went on my still-on-going recovery journey.

Did I suffer two heartbreaks in less than 12 hours? Yes. Were they worth it? Eh. I mean, it inspired my fanfic, but wasn't THAT worth it. Did I enjoy my trip? No, I threw up, had diarrhea, and then constipation for two weeks.

I still get an awful surprise when I rewatch Good Omens for a specific scene, only to find out AGAIN that I was just hallucinating.

Moral of the story - don't do drugs and be honest with your doctors and nurses cuz you might actually die.

Anyways, TOODLES!!1!!111!!!

~ CAwdra

[indiestsnake]

Okay the new chapter was AMAZING and so very filled with angst but the last line gives me hope, I am so so so invested in the story so far I honestly couldn’t tell you how much I love it lmao it’s so good

I do have a question though! What does it mean when the cycle “collapses the sky”? What would that even look like? :3

well, there’s kinda an issue with answering that. a lot of what I say about the larger rules of the world and the greater cycle is intentionally vague. it’s the only way to preserve some of the eldritch, primitive mystique the game achieves. cuz like. there is no “explanation” for the void sea, and i think the devs intended that. which is why i try not to explain too much stuff, it keeps with the games theming.

but.

I do have an explain for this one ;)

to put it bluntly, the sky is a physical barrier. there is no space, nothing beyond. the sun and stars theoretically exist in physical space, but not even Saint can reach them. So, if Saint spends too much time dilly-dallying from his task, and no other discipline has worked…

The sky just falls.

Yeah. It just falls. Mountains are crushed, the stars fall, the sun goes out, the moon crumbles and all life is destroyed. If Saint survives this (by going underground or smthn similar), the sky starts to push down. eventually, it meets the void sea… and that’s it. There’s no surviving that, not even for Saint.

Saint wakes up in another cycle, admittedly. technically, nothing is forcing him to do his task, he could just live life as a slugcat and deal with the occasional earth-shattering apocalypse. But I don’t think I need to explain the holes in that strategy.

[what-if-i-just-did]

Guilt & Revenge: Hallucinations

Whumpcember, Day 4: Hallucinations

Guilt & Revenge Masterlist

Awww look it's Amber's very first time being tortured! I loved writing this but now I don't have a buffer anymore... whoops. I hope you enjoy, lmk if you wanna be added to the taglist! I also wanted to say that, although I won't be adding it to the tw's since it's not really noticable in the story, this is TECHNICALLY minor whump cuz at this point in the story Amber is still seventeen.

Taglist: @silentlysurffering98

TWs: captivity (on a boat), hallucinations, sensory deprivation (tied down + blindfold), muzzle, sea sickness, messed up sense of time, off-screen abduction, mention of ADHD and hunger

Amber tried to fight back while they tied him up, but Paul and Eileen were just stronger than him, especially with him being exhausted as fuck. He could barely even struggle when they muzzled, and blindfolded him. He cursed them out and yelled at them, but it made no difference at all. Then, once he was secured to the bed, if you could even call it that, he heard them leave.

His mind was racing. This was sure to be the first of many tortures he would be forced to endure. From what they’d told him, they seemed to be starting easy. Maybe he would get lucky and everything would remain this basic, and everything they’d mentioned had just been hyperbole and bluff. Sensory deprivation was easy enough… for now.

Amber couldn’t tell how long it took time to pass. Everything seemed to be taking an eternity, but any time he tried to think about how long it might have been, it only felt like a few minutes. His thoughts drifted everywhere- movies, things that had been said, his childhood, how fucked up this situation was, his friends. It was almost like normal nights when he got lost in thought, occasionally chuckling at how ADHD his mind was. The rope binding him and the uncomfortably warm leather of the muzzle strapped to his face reminded him that it was not at all the same. He didn’t even know if it was night at all.

He thought of Noah-Elise. He thought of the painting she gave him that he’d been meaning to hang up. He thought of Trevor’s recent idea of adding alcoholic milkshakes and slushies to the menu at Tipped, and how Dave had actually taken it seriously. He thought about how neither of his parents would have ever done that, taken him seriously like that, if they’d even theoretically had a business like that. He thought about the first months after he moved out, how grateful he was, how he could finally start living his own life, how Dave and Zander had supported him in ways his biological parents never had. He thought about his family, his real family, his FOUND family. He thought of Jake. If Jake was here, he would have been able to overpower them. They would be out by now… and Jake would be pissed.

The bobbing of the boat was making him nauseous, especially without his sight. He had no idea where he was- he just knew it was on a boat, which seemed to be home-renovated specifically for him to have a cell. He knew.. actually, yeah, he should put together everything he knew. He knew the boat was bigger than the cell. He could only see the other half of the room he was in, but he knew there was more. He had no idea what body of water the boat was in. He didn’t even know if he was still in the same state- Hell, he could be in Canada for all he knew. 

Suddenly, a sound brought him out of his thoughts. Footsteps, right next to him- but he hadn’t heard anyone enter the boat, hadn’t heard the boat they'd left in returning. Had they actually left? How long had it been? “Who’s there?” He tried to sound demanding, but ended up sounding like a scared little kitten trying to roar. 

Nobody answered. Nobody came close to him. It was silent.

He was sure there’d been a sound. Right? He was sure?

He was sure.

….

He wasn't sure.

What if there hadn’t been a sound? Was he going insane? How long in complete solitude, unable to see or move, would it take for someone to become insane? How long had it been? Thirty minutes, six days? More, less? How could he know? He didn’t fucking know! He was hungry. So, maybe just a few hours. When was the last time he ate? He was hungry when he was abducted, too. Did they give him food? He had no clue. Couldn’t remember.

He heard something, in the corner, like water dripping. He turned his head towards the sound, but it made no difference- the simple fabric of the blindfold robbed him of his sight. 

Was he imagining it? Or might the boat have a leak? Would they leave him here long enough to drown? He tried to struggle against his restraints again, but found his limbs feeling weak and hollow. It was a feeling he knew intimately during his childhood, the feeling you get when you haven’t eaten in a day or so too long. He thought there might be black spots in his vision, which would help him further narrow down how long he’d gone without food, but being blindfolded and all, he couldn’t quite tell. 

Tears formed puddles by his eyes, and he shook his head wildly to try to get them away, since his hands were tied. The movement made his head feel incredibly light.

Amber inhaled sharply as he awoke. What? No. He hadn’t been asleep. 

Shit… 

Shaking his head had made him pass out. Fuck. For how long? 

Seconds? Minutes? Hours?

More?

Time trickled past him, like the water softly finding it’s way from the pile of snow it melted from. Time was thundering past, trying to drown him, like he was stuck in a large waterfall, making it hard to breathe. Time was wind, playing with leaves on the other side of the room. 

Why could he hear wind? There was no wind in the windowless cell in the belly of a boat in an unknown location.

There wasn’t any firewood to be crackling, making him flinch with how close it sounded to his face.

There wasn’t any marble for high heels to click on, and nobody was walking around him.

There wasn’t… he didn’t think there was a clock, driving him mad with the needless precise ticking, but there might have been. 

The last thing he’d been focused on yesterday was if there was a clock or not. He wished he had, even fleetingly, noticed if there was.

There weren’t any animals growling in his ear. There really, simply, just weren’t.

He heard them all anyway.

Amber felt parched. He was so, so thirsty. He was hungry, too, but fuck he needed water. He’d do anything for a glass of water. The tears stopped at some point, he couldn’t tell when. Time was a haze. His mouth felt like a goddamn desert. He wanted to cry.

How long had it been? Two days? Five? Seven? Would they leave him like this to die? How long did he have left if he was left this way? 

What if it had only been hours? Was it possible to get this thirsty, this hungry, in less than a day? Was he delusional? If they came back, would they ever tell him how long it had been? Would he ever know? 

Fuck, he hated them so much. He felt so helpless, tied down to an uncomfortable-as-shit bed. He wanted to beat them up and get the hell out of this place. He felt so seasick, he was honestly surprised he hadn’t thrown up. He wanted the police, or Jake, or Dave, or hell, he’d settle for Lore or even his father,  to bust down the doors, rip off his blindfold, untie him, and get him out. He wanted out.

He heard it, a few times. Voices in the distance that he recognised- Jake, or Noah-Elise, or his friends, or Dave, or some combination. Someone opening the cell door. Sirens. Sounds that indicated he was being saved, alongside the other sounds. The random ones. 

The fire and the clock and the growling.

His whole body felt numb. He was slipping in and out of consciousness, or maybe he was falling asleep. Where was the boundary between excessive thought and dream? It was dark before his eyes either way. He couldn’t move, and it felt like circulation to his legs had been cut off. Maybe they were turning blue and purple and black and falling off. He didn’t know.

Amber didn’t know. He was going fucking insane, and he was stuck. He couldn’t do anything.

He just wanted to go home.

[phoenixcatch7]

Random mdzs headcanons that I don't think interfere with canon:

Though sufficient cultivation cures this, lwj is short sighted. (this is because of that mxtx interview but if he actually was short sighted he would be wearing glasses in canon.) Similarly, so would lxc and lqr is already halfway there lol.

Wen chao is barely older than the main cast. Like a couple years at most. This is is because it took until his poor wife (who shall forever be unknown, rip) being mentioned for me to go 'that's an ADULT?!'. Everything from the voice to the face to the short sighted immaturity and the lying to adults in charge, there's no way this guy is anything over 20.

Lqr isn't a very strong cultivator for all his technical skill is impeccable. I think this because I thought he was young grandparent age when he's the uncle!! It's too much stress! Major props.

He's also aromantic! We know that nothing will stop a lan in love, much to their detriment, but not only does lqr seem to regard the lot of them as idiots for finding the absolute worst choices ever but I feel if he'd also loved and lost it would have been... Relevant.

Jfm was gay, and his unrequited love was wcz. Alternate sexualities (and queerness as a whole) is one of those things that's still so dangerous in many countries, and I guess ancient fantasy China is one of them! Poor mxy. Anyway that plus arranged marriages plus jfm being an only child (to my knowledge) and needing heirs... Yeah I feel like that's one of those things that happens. It's common all throughout history, forcing people into het relationships for any number of reasons or risk social (or even physical) death. I could so easily trace how that would have affected him through the courtship, marriage, his parents, him genuinely trying to love yzy and maybe deep inside knowing it was doomed to fail, her intelligence picking up on that and trying to figure out how she was unworthy, her feeling hurt and disrespected, getting more and more paranoid and sensitive as it wears on, her being so close to the right answer but correcting her would expose him. Him just trying to settle for mutual respect and teamwork and her never getting what she needs to be fulfilled in life, what she was raised and trained all her life in preparation for. The way he's so unwilling to force his kids to do anything miserable and the way he's so quick to call off the engagement when all he's hearing is disinterest and incompatibility. I could make this a whole post on its own but I fully believe this man lived and died like so many other queer people have in the past - never being able to find out who he truly was, and that he wasn't broken for not being the way he needed to be. Wangxian have an easier time of it, but when there's stories like mxy? People keep their heads down. He raised jc the way he was raised, and he turned out fine. It wasn't their fault he was such a failure of a son.

To cheer things up, I firmly believe that wwx is bisexual af. Just because lwj is his soulmate doesn't mean he's not. Are you an mxtx protag if you're simply, straightforwardly gay? I think not.

Though I do wonder if jc being Banned From Women was 100% an entirely whoopsie daisy accident. Sometimes standards are supposed to be impossible... Now I think about it, the certainty lwj hated wwx, the total lack of any partner, the focus on jl, the constant frustration with wwx's flirting and incomprehension with jyl crushing on jzx... I think the women are the only straight ones in the family, cuz he's sounding the aroace bell! Good for him tbh!!! Break the cycle!!!!

Lsh is the child of either wrh, wc, jgs, or two perfectly lovely normal people who died in war/childbirth. He was 100% a village kid, so thank goodness they all stepped up. I feel like one of the wens would have told wwx his parentage either way, so if he hasn't told anyone else I can't imagine it's great.

Each sect is associated with an element. The wens of course were fire, the nie earth, the lan air, the jin water (koi/carp tower), and the jiang are lightning (given we assume yzy and the jiang territory are compatible (her husband is probably water lol oof)). Years of specialised clan training and select marriages have caused the clan members qi to take on movement (at minimum) matching the respective elements. This is based on the anime, where everyone has nice handy colour coded qi, but the twin jades have the prettiest cloud texture that perfectly matches their crest and wwx has an almost lightning spiky red with just enough smoulder to make he sure he's a fire type. This also!!! Matches their fighting styles, have you noticed?? Idk if they did it on purpose or not but it's so cool!!! Wwx and jc are constantly moving, redirection, bounce and flip around; lwj and lxc are very twirly, lots of attacks from above, lwj often lets his sword fly mid battle, and of course the music! And the nie are very... Brick wall lol. I'd say NHS is air? Maybe? Water?

This one's a bit silly, but I like to imagine csr and bsr are mother and daughter from a distant land where people use their surnames last (gasp) and it wasn't really important to bsr cuz secluded mountain but they did figure it was going to be a problem a touch late. 'oh but phoenix they have different spellings in Chinese' csr got asked 'oh so like the immortal?' panicked and changed it on the spot. Her husband's nicknames all use her 'surname', he's the only one who knows about the mix up.

Spinning in the air helps you change an attack or helps you float. Yes this is based entirely on the anime (donghua?) where even the most serious of characters (lwj) do three full rotations before landing a big attack midair. It might be so he has time to get his guqin out lmao.

Jc is left handed, I'm pretty sure that's anime canon at least. Any good swordsman (or dual sword whip wielder!) can do a little ambidexterousness tho.

Wwx can do decent guqin cuz he's the gentleman prodigy of the arts but he probably whittled a dozen dizi out of roadside bamboo on long journeys to entertain himself which is why chengching was such a fine tuned spiritual tool.

The jiangs were a great sect lead by good people in an ehhhh family. Individually they're all actually decent people but they bring out the worst in each other even as it keeps them all in check.

I firmly believe that yzy was holding back a LOT when made to whip wwx in front of the wen wench. That's a whole entire spiritual weapon and she was going at it wildly in a barely stable environment. Compare that to lwj who took the discipline whip not too many more times (if any) and was rendered bed bound if not house bound for years recovering (and grieving) and over a decade later is still a mass of scar tissue. And that was an orderly and structured punishment using materials designed to NOT kill the victim, not a whole entire LIGHTNING MURDER WEAPON. Wwx was back on his feet minutes later sword fighting, rowing, carrying jc on his back... Lwj is the more realistic result, real whips can be lethal, and very, very dangerous. They are excruciatingly painful and if you make a mistake they can easily flay skin and muscle to crack bone. You're not supposed to strike the same patch of skin twice. Yeah wwx and his stupid pain tolerance but I truly believe him and yzy were in full accord in that moment with the roles they had to play (and jc hated every second). She could at least have apologised... in the middle of heated battle for her home and life though....

Lwjs eyes are gold and sunset and stars' YES ALSO BUT I looked at them and my immediate reaction was 'that's a bird of prey'. They're LITERALLY falcon eyes, they're identical, and I've never once seen that comparison :(. He's already piercing/intense/pinning/scouring, (and his anime eyeliner and dark lashes look like the markings) he's so perfect for the metaphor. Make it that wwx is the rabbit prey, come on.

Why is wwx sun coded but moon aesthetic and lwj moon coded but sun aesthetic like how's that fair why does it always happen.

Stop blaming wwx for Suiban he admits he came up with a zillion good names and it was jfm who didn't pick any and named it as a joke. Ngl if that was my trusted person who went and did that I would have been gutted but hey wwx thrives. I do feel like jfm naming the sword that wwx sacrifices to save jc is grounds for some angst at the very least.

Lxc was definitely in some situation with the other two because he does read as a parallel to lwj. Their romantic lives are basically inversions of each other, you could hold a graph up to a mirror. It's just that lwj was so deeply lucky to get wwx back, and he fell in love with someone true to himself. Lxc just got used and left with the ashes, no matter how much true love was on either side. Wwx chose family, kindness and community with poverty and jgy chose greed and power and wealth for total isolation. It was NHS that inverted their fates, but either brother's love could only come at the cost of the other. Poor qiren...

All those fancy huge ribbons in everyone's hair (again it's the anime donghua) are special and ridiculously sturdy ribbons given by the parents they wear in varying styles to tie it all up and as they grow up so they don't trip on it. This is a silly headcanon but I love it cuz those ribbons are stupid long and literally everyone has it. Maybe it's the mdzs equivalent of the guan ceremony?

Wwx has for sure done cannibalism.

Ooh painful headcanon time - his parents died in yiling right? And all corpses get tossed into the mounds for centuries, right? Nonzero chance wwx's parents bodies broke his fall.

Lwj gets wwx a mule for a birthday/festival cuz those guys are basically the perfect mounts humans are ever going to get, they're just v rare and infertile. They're smart and brave as donkeys and fast and strong like the horse, resulting in an animal that is down for mounted parkour with the right training. And then lwj can ride a horse alongside wwx when they go travelling ^^. Idk I just think it'd be super cute.

Wwx only comes up with good names when he's doing real bad. Names when he's doing good: Suiban, li'l apple, rulan (after his bf). Names when he's doing bad: chengqing, yin iron tally/stygian tiger amulet, compass of evil.

[victimsofyaoipoll]

Round 2

Propaganda Under Cut

Amy Rose

WAUGH okay so basically like everyone villainizes her when shipping Sonic with any other character (and 99% of the time its Amy being villainized against a m/m ship ://) but yeah Amy canonically has a "crush" on Sonic and stuff (which is weird in its self cuz age gaps and things but creators smh) and anyways any time people write Sonic in a relationship with other characters they always make her super upset and mad that Sonic isn't dating her etc etc and basically make her a pouting 12 year old because her super hero crush doesn't date her instead of writing her as a supportive best friend to sonic WHICH SHE SHOULD BE WRITTEN AS !!!! and uh yeah if you couldn't tell this makes me so upset because amy is such a good character people should stop ruining her

STOP MAKING HER HOMOPHOBIC!!! SHE WOULD NOT FUCKING SAY THAT!!!!!!!

sonamy isnt even real but people still hate her for her pink girl swag and crush on sonic. amy rose forever victim of girlhatred among sth fans. charm points: big hammer. cute. sillay. constantly in positions of power that make you go how is this 12 year old so responsible.

Mia Winters

she's Ethan's wife and Rose's mother, and I tend to see her villainized in fanfiction (especially chris/ethan and ESPECIALLY karl/ethan) because shes a genuinely traumatized and complicated character, but people turn her into the shitty, abusive wife or the dead wife trope for the sake of her technically getting in the way of their ship. The best I've seen her written while still placing her out of the story was her being casually divorced but like, co parenting. 

people are so mean to her just so they can push Wintersberg (Ethan Winters x Karl Heisenberg). she's not the best all the time but the evil forces r so bad to her. so i don't think it's her fault. Mia Winters haters DNI!!!!!!!! 

Mia Winters is a secret agent, researcher and BOW handler who is married to Just Some Guy. When she accidentally lures her white bread husband to a spooky den of mold monsters, she sacrifices herself to save him from the mess she made (god forbid women do anything). Chronic victim of getting fridged or turned into a third wheel so one or more of a handful of men can play house with her husband and daughter.