#…i mean yeah technically cuz of that story…

[sunrizef1]

The Truth in Pretending

Pairing: Logan Sargeant x Fem!Reader

Warnings: umeployed!logan, Williams racing

Requested: Yes/No

Summary: Logan is on the brink of losing his seat. Maybe a relationship with a famous singer would help him keep it.

ynln

📍New York City, New York

liked by oliviarodrigo sabrinacarpenter and 6,088,987 others

ynln life lately 💕

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user1 my baby

user2 diva core

user3 I am feral for this woman

user4 new music when??????

user5 real 😭

oliviarodrigo beautiful girl 😘

liked by ynln

ynln no, you 🫶

user6 I love her

user7 MY BAEEEEE

user8 I need new music

user9 how can I relate this post to rep tv

user10 that cat is so real cuz I would act the same way if I met y/n

sabrinacarpenter 💕

ynln 💕

user11 looked in the mirror and sighed

user12 need her

user13 Taylor liked

user14 god PLEASE

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sabrinacarpenter

u could say that again 😮‍💨

never taking another tequila shot again 🤮

ynln

It wasn’t *that* bad

I’ve only thrown up twice this morning 🤷‍♀️

sabrinacarpenter

well, don’t look at me for blame

we needed to celebrate your last day of independence

ynln

That’s not what that was

I’m sure he’s wonderful

sabrinacarpenter

hmm

he’ll have to win me over

I’m not convinced

Especially since it’s his team making you do this

ynln

I could’ve said no

sabrinacarpenter

but u didn’t

Cuz u were pressured into it

it’s not hard to tell

I litteraly have a whole song about not being a mind-reader and even I could tell

ynln

wtvr

it’s fine, really

sabrinacarpenter

have u even met him

ynln

We meet today

sabrinacarpenter

Good luck, soldier 🫡

you’ll need it 💋

ynln liked a message ♥️

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ynln added to their story

sabrinacarpenter liked your story ♥️

taylorswift liked your story ♥️

oliviarodrigo liked your story ♥️

logansargeant liked your story ♥️

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logansargeant

who took this?

ynln

lily!

she was walking with Alex behind us on the way out

logansargeant

oh, I didn’t know they were there

it’s a cute picture

ynln

you rly think so?

logansargeant

I like it, at least

ynln

don’t worry

I do too

logansargeant

thanks for coming btw

you didn’t have to

ynln

I mean, technically I was contractually obligated to

but I had fun

I’m glad I came

logansargeant

but I finished p20

sorry I couldn’t make your first race more exciting

I fear it will be a lot of p20 this season

ynln

Logan, it’s fine

I know nothing about f1

I was just having fun watching you race

logansargeant

so I take it you liked your first race?

ynln

I did!

lily might just be my new favorite person

Don’t tell Sabrina I said that

logansargeant

I don’t have any way to do that so I think you’re safe

I’m getting nervous you might like lily more than you like me

I mean, ur not contractually obligated to hang out with her

ynln

lol

we might be a contract but I do like you lo

dw

logansargeant

good to know

ynln liked a message ♥️

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sabrinacarpenter

ew, nerds

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logansargeant added to their story

ynln

hi :)

logansargeant liked a message ♥️

logansargeant

do u maybe have extra shampoo in your hotel room…?

I don’t have any

ynln

oh my sweet angel logan

I don’t use hotel shampoo

You can have all of mine

logansargeant

oh yay

can u bring it over

ynln

yeah I got you

what room are you

logansargeant

4567

ynln

Oh you’re just down the hall

I’ll be over in a min

logansargeant

thank you :)

ynln liked a message ♥️

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sabrinacarpenter

oh my poor baby

stuck in England for American independence day

ynln

I think I’ll survive 🤷‍♀️

sabrinacarpenter

oh?

ynln

yeah

I mean I have this lovely little puppy for company

sabrinacarpenter

who’s dog is that?

ynln

Logan’s

sabrinacarpenter

ugh

not him

ynln

He’s wonderful

sabrinacarpenter

hmmmm

I’m not convinced

ynln

well I am

sabrinacarpenter

oh!

you’re not into him, r u?

ynln

Nope

he’s just rly nice sab

sabrinacarpenter

mmmm

ynln

well I have a 4th of July party to get ready for

bye sab

sabrinacarpenter

don’t think I didn’t notice that ur having a party with Logan when there’s not even anyone around to see it and help your pr

ynln

ur getting blocked

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logansargeant

where’d u goooo ☹️

ynln

lol I’m in the backyard

u good?

logansargeant

yeah, I’m just feeling too patriotic

need to talk to another American

ynln

you’ve been talking to me all day?

logansargeant

well yeah but I can’t go too long without an American or I start to turn British

ynln

lol, come outside

logansargeant

already omw ☺️

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ynln added to their story

sabrinacarpenter liked your story ♥️

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logansargeant liked your story ♥️

logansargeant

❤️❤️❤️❤️

ynln

❤️❤️❤️❤️

logansargeant

I’m so glad u came :)

ynln

I am too

I meant it when I said I was proud of you

logansargeant

thanks y/n :)

for once, I am too

ynln liked a message ♥️

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ynln

liked by taylorswift logansargeant and 12,998,907 others

ynln happy summer ☀️

packing it up out now 🎧

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user15 AHHHHH

user16 y/n l/n returns to Instagram posts

user17 WAIT THIS SONG IS SO CUTE

user18 I spot Logan!

user19 “I came so close to packing it up but then you happened” 😭

user20 waitttt this is lovely

user21 this is her so high school

taylorswift so good!!! 🙌

liked by ynln ♥️

user22 Logan sargeant you have rocked my world

lilymhe I would like photo creds

ynln so sorry guys, lily took the middle photo!!!!

user23 wait the Williams boys vacationed together? 🥺

user24 this is so

logansargeant ☀️

liked by ynln ♥️

user25 BOAF OF EM

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logansargeant

idk can you make the plane move faster or something

ynln

Ur so impatient

logansargeant

sry I wanna see my gf who I love or wtvr

ynln

oh?

There’s a couple big steps in that statement

logansargeant

Delete delete delete

how do u delete messages on Instagram

I didn’t say a word

ynln

oh no, dw, I enjoyed it

logansargeant

r u sure?

cus I just figured out how to delete messages

thanks google

ynln

nope

don’t delete it

as ur gf, I think I should get used to that

(+ I love u 2, so the feelings mutual)

logansargeant

oh thank god

I was worried I’d have to disappear off the face of the planet

ynln

oh don’t do that

I haven’t even seen you as your official gf yet

logansargeant

giggling and kicking my feet

ynln

lmfao, shut up 😭

logansargeant liked a message ♥️ ——

ynln

📍London, England

liked by logansargeant sabrinacarpenter and 21,676,088 others

ynln back where he belongs

tagged: logansargeant

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user26 I am deeply in love with them

user27 as a Logan fan, I am thankful for this sign of life

user28 love that, instead of using a candid, she used a pic of him at Williams just to put an x over the logo lmfao

user29 she’s so diva, I love it

user30 MY SHAYLAAAA

sabrinacarpenter ig he’s alright

liked by ynln ♥️

logansargeant I’m honored

sabrinacarpenter don’t get too cocky, ur still unemployed 🚩

user31 They’re MY Taylor and Travis

user32 I WAS SO CLOSE TO PACKING IT UPPP BUT THATS RIGHT WHEN YOU HAPPENEDDDDDD

taylorswift happy for you!

ynln thanks tay!

user33 HES FREE! WORST EXPERIENCE OF HIS LIFE!

user34 why does my goat look so happy to be fired

user35 if I got to get out of that hellhole and go home to my beautiful girlfriend who writes sweet songs about me, I would also be very happy

logansargeant I love you 😍

ynln lol, I love you too nerd

user36 oh my god they’re so perfect I love them so much

user37 actually let’s talk more about the x over the Williams logo

user38 killatrav liked

user39 ofc he did, this is tayvis 2.0

user40 tayvis this, tayvis that. No, this is my Louis and Olivia.

user41 new albums gonna bang

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tag list: @evie-119 @casperlikej

[nebby-exists]

Meet Black Wolfberry, or well,

This fecking thing.

I don’t got much to do or say with this—

But- uh-

Dis lil thing is Frigid’s kid.

Very lil fella. 

Its name is Black Wolfberry cookie— cuz I’m struggling to find a proper name—

It ain’t exactly like how white orchid was born (no mama),

Mostly cuz the oc I ship with him time to time is literally known as famine, or in some other stories, abyssal sea cookie. I ain’t showing it just yet but long story short she basically this kid’s mom and the literal licorice sea abyss seems to be friendly with her…almost like seeing her as its mom??? Idk just yet I might change some stuff so I don’t accidentally make it weird depending if Frigid cacao is his own thing or possessed by the licorice sea in some monster manner.

Due to how dis fecking thing was born, she’s immune to the frosty touch, though kinda has similar abilities in some way(distress causes frost that leads to drowsiness, lack of energy, but won’t kill you…immediately. The frost can just be broken off or put under water to thaw it off, so less of an issue than her father’s frost).

This ends up meaning she can be picked up by her papa without turning into an icicle. She got a big appetite (theoretically like her dad and mom, depending on what side effects other than not moving or talking much cacao got—), but most often she’s like those little animal videos where the lil guy ‘politely’ eats, or something.

She can form a maw, but it’s rare. 

Like her papa, she originally doesn’t talk much, making small gurgling noises and head movements to communicate. At a certain point she does get abit talkative…as in gurgling like sounds, growls…yeah she can’t speak technically just yet, but she’ll get there.

She kinda acts like a cat at times, and hell even skittered around like a cat, or just slithers. She’s got legs but she doesn’t care too much.

Which the additional canon of Cacao only visiting Midnight Lily, she would find out about the lil guy, and kinda has to deal with the fact he got with a harbinger lady (/j?). Overall she thinks it’s sweet.

I’d say at a point Black Wolfberry cookie might end up following white orchid after realizing some stuff. That, and they kinda done with being kept in the walls all the time. It ain’t their first rodeo somehow getting out and at a point ended up in the desert, so you can guess the stress the poor guy gonna be in.

Height comparison. Chances are she might be smaller but I don’t want to make her ant sized. (I might change her  secondary color—)

She love her papa, but she can’t tell if he care or not. Atleast he doesn’t mind her sleeping on him or messing with his hair—

Or hiding in it—

Anywho,

Beast ancients Au/ Frigid Cacao belongs to @cuppajj

Black Wolfberry aka this little fecking thing belongs to meee :33

[urautismdiagnosis-wistie]

Ships hehe

BOATS (ships)

OK SO I won't tolerate anyone trashing aro ace people or queer platonic relationships or invalidating them, THAT OUT OF THE WAY TIME FOR HEADCANONSSS

barnacles and kwazii 🐻‍❄️💛🐱: I originally shipped them when I was like 12 lol

To me they're going to become a QPR and they mean the world to me.

I need to start actually posting my stories to showcase what's gonna happen BUT CMON GUYS THEY HAD AN ENTIRE EPISODE ABOUT THEM BEING A SYMBIOTIC RELATIONSHIP?!

Like I'm gonna be so real they were octopod POD mates. (Their rooms in the same bubble lol)

Kwazii is his ✨first mate✨

They're a married couple that doesn't realize it yet!I'm going to trauma bond them and no one can stop me. Cuz I've already done it 😎👍✨

They deeply trust eachother! I'm going to make barnacles be horrified that he could've almost lost kwazii after kwazii nearly died! Barnacles loves this silly cat man! Kwazii loves to be appreciated and make barnacles proud! They emotionally support eachother! Kwazii is going to have nightmares about the captain dying in a horrific way that totally doesn't relate to the intens psychological trauma I've given him! Barnacles wants to be useful and have someone to love but also someone to tell him its ok and that he doesn't have to be perfect or brave all the time! Kwazii wants to not be alone and prove himself to someone who truly sees the worth in him while being able to trust that they'd always stay loyal together! They have so many inside jokes and shared moments of near death experiences! Accordian music and shanties!

anyways onto SHELLINGTON AND DASHI AY AY AY AYYYY

Uhhh so I haven't posted their designs and my headcanons but yes Shellington is autistic to me (totally not me projecting but yall see the username. Ill get into why I think he's autistic on my character design post for him) and yes I think yk what? Maybe he was a little lonely and weird as a kid and yk what also? Maybe he does have some chronic pain too I dont make the rules (yes I do)

Anyways like shellington, I'm giving my baby issues and fears relating to not being like part of the group lol. Subconsciously anyways. And yk he found his people, the octonauts who value him and his interests and dont blame him for messing up lol and he likes himself as a person

(BTW he wouls totally try to adopt a cryptid like creature (new species!) abomination and name it Steve I already have an entire plot)

Do yall remember when they were sent to spend several weeks alone together in the midnight zone cuz I do

Regardless i think dashi just casually asked him ayyo wanna date and then he bluescreened LOL

As for dashi well, I'll get into her headcanons when I post her character design as well, but regardless she needs someone who understands and supports her passions without judgement yk?

She is so incredible,like photography, computer specialist, apparently technically a scientist, a surfer, able to pilot deep marine vehicles, got swallowed by a whale, did a flip from the manta ray while diving FRKM SEVERAL METWRS IN THE AIR INTO WAYER THAT WAS ABOUT TO HAVE LAVA POUR INTO IT???, and is a whole pilot now apaprently???

Like holy-

Anyways yeah dashi thinks shellington is an amazing single father with so much kindness and emotional intelligence and many many charming qualities 🥰

Shellington thinks dashi is Like actually a really really awesome person??? Like they both like organizing things!! Shes funny and smart!! They can both talk about eachothers interests and he likes to make her happy!! She's really cool and kind and helps him with stuff and she's super intelligent and charming! He just thinks she's oh so very cool. She's so confident and has kind eyes 🥰

Anyways yes

Btw just wanna say that tweak is like if u were aro ace to the max lolll shes just content with her life and friends lol

now for the penguin(s) in the room

ok so shes gonna be a plot relevant character in a story I've got in the works (The Oil RIg) it'll be a fun ride dw, but we love medic x depressed woman its great and yes I do think peso could pull any gal just by existing like straight up fight me on this fight me fIGHT ME-

ok not fight I'm not like that but I will stand on this hill till I die

but fr tho it was a whole telenovellahow they met omg- I'm talking the drama- thelore- thesoftmoments and the heartbreaking goodbyes- not to worry tho they do meet again and are like long distance(with tons of visiting) lol they have a very healthy relationship tho considering that shes like idk, ig fresh out of a like, very unhealthy environment

i ain't gonna spoil anything rn tho lol but she Gon save his life and he gon save hers and its gonna be beautiful<3 <3 <#

[thinkingrocks]

vox's life: headcannons

im an electrical engineer and i have opinions on this character. moral of the story: don't fuck with CRT capacitors, shits scary

i have a lot of Vox thoughts, or Voughts, and i will be rambling about them at legnth under the cut.

TLDR: he invented zuckerberging. also i see his "canon" death date of 1950s and respectfully disagree. its way funnier if he died the year widespread television became a thing. the fruits of his labor were all for naught etc etc

1928: Vox was in college as an electrical engineer when the first ever live TV Demo happened, and I think he was immediately obsessed with it. Decided he'd do anything to work with TV. He and his friend/roommate at the time went full tilt into learning about TVs and working on them, and by the time they graduated, they had the beginnings of what would be a very profitable company.. together.

1930s: Out of the two of them, Vox has the better social skills(relative), so he's the one who talks to investors and handles that part of the business, though he still works on some tech. He decides he likes talking to people, marketing, manipulating, being a little showman. I like to think this ties into that one trivia fact that he likes watching commercials.

early 1940s: He starts wondering why he's splitting half of this company(HIS company) with some guy who can't even bother to attend business meetings. Tensions start rising, he starts using some of that handy manipulation skill he honed in business on his friends

1945: Tensions break. Through less than legitimate means, he steals the company out from under his partner. His partner threatens to go start his own, since he did the majority of the tech work. We can't have that. Vox doesn't kill him himself, imo, because he is kind of allergic to getting his hands dirty. He revs up that media training and uses it to create a smear campaign so brutal and widespread that his former partner offs himself. Problem solved

Late 1940s: Vox starts getting paranoid about people trying to steal his empire from him, funny that. He starts trying to do everything himself, because he doesn't trust anyone. Starts losing a lot of sleep, getting a little insane but its fine man. Don't worry about it.

1947: Sleep deprived, paranoid, and working on a final prototype model due soon, he electrocutes himself because you shouldn't fuck with CRT capacitors. Wakes up in hell with electricity powers and a CRT head because it's hilarious.

Alastor: Yeah we all know what we're here for. I don't think they ever met in life, but I definitely think Vox knew of him. Alastor was actively broadcasting during the 20s up until his death in 1933, and college student Vox I think listened to a lot of radio while studying and working. I also think in the later years, Alastor was never technically caught as a serial killer, but "hey I think that radio guy was that one killer, cuz he stopped broadcasting right after he stopped killing" was like one of those insane conspiracy statements you'd say to get a laugh at parties, but Vox always secretly kind of believed it, and was VERY vindicated in hell.

I am fully prepared for actual canon to contradict all of this but that's fine because it means they finally had to get season 2 out.

[not-wholly-unheroic]

I remember seeing a bunch of these “what if Hook was the actual hero? The reason he hates Peter Pan? Here are theories that Hook was a Lost Boy?”, when I was younger and it didn’t really make sense.

Okay? Cool? I’m fine with villains having a sympathetic backstory, but not every villain is meant to be some sort of tragic hero.

I may not have read “Peter and Wendy”, but I’m very familiar with most Peter Pan media aside from the Disney originals and Hook doesn’t really need any special reason to hate Peter Pan other than the obvious “That scurvy brat cut off my hand!” I don’t know about everyone else, but I’d certainly hate someone enough to see them as a rival to kill on the spot for something like that.

But overall, Hook is a pirate. Have people conveniently forgotten that pirates would gore, maim, mutilate, and kill people for the fun of it during their whole pillage and ransacking of other ships? If it wasn’t Peter, then it totally would’ve been someone else.

Heck, Smee called Pan’s actions as a “childish prank” and Hook agreed “Aye, but throwing it to the crocodile! That wretched beast liked the taste of me so well, it’s been following me ever since, licking his chops for the rest of me!”

So, it’s not just the hand…although apparently Hook’s gotten used to it. Again, he’s a pirate captain, however and whenever the crew had gotten into Neverland, there’d bound to have been other pirates that they encountered before Peter Pan. It’s the fact that Tic Toc Croc never leaves Hook alone. Now Tic Toc clearly would eat anyone else, but Hook is the main snack of his attention.

It reminds me of that story about a tigress where she literally tracked and stalked a specific hunter.

So yeah, understandably, Hook has a right to be angry. He doesn’t really need any more motivation than that to hate Peter Pan.

I am curious in how and why, cuz I highly doubt Peter’s dagger would be able to chop off a hand in one blow. And I doubt Hook would’ve just been standing around to let someone, let alone a child, do that to him. “Peter Pan” (2003) does a good job in showing the mutilated stump of such an injury.

But I wonder what exactly led up to that point.

I agree with you on the “Hook was a Lost Boy and Peter is actually evil and Hook is trying to save them” trope. It’s been done so many times now and I’m just…very over it. Besides, while it is, I suppose, technically possible Hook could have been a Lost Boy AND an Etonian…it just…doesn’t seem likely to me that he would be both. And most of those retellings just end up leaving Eton out entirely…which…bothers me because it’s a big part of his character. Even if he wasn’t there for long, it clearly left its mark on him with his obsession with “good form.” Also…I like Hook in part BECAUSE he is a villain. I find him fascinating because he is a sympathetic villain with a great deal of potential for redemption. I don’t WANT him to be the hero from the get-go. That fundamentally changes his character and means we don’t get to see the complexities of his emotions and trauma play out as he struggles to BECOME a hero in his own right. Making him the hero from the start just skips over all that and totally ignores canon for both him and Peter. Peter may be a selfish, cocky kid who can be cruel at times…but he’s not some demon child and people need to stop pretending that he is. Like Hook, Peter is a fun character specifically because he is complicated. Don’t turn him into some straight-up villain who is flat and boring and totally unlikable. Barrie pretty clearly meant for us to like both Peter and Hook and have mixed feelings about them. It’s who they are and it’s why his story has stood the test of time—because well-written characters aren’t one-dimensional.

Also…making Hook the hero and Peter the villain completely misses the point… Frankly, the whole issue Peter and Hook have with each other is (ironically) that they BOTH need to do some growing up. In Peter’s case, it’s pretty obvious. He has physically and emotionally stopped aging. Hook may be a grown man, but (and I say this as someone who loves Hook) he is emotionally very immature. He loses his temper easily, holds a grudge against a kid rather than taking responsibility for his part in things as the adult, and generally just doesn’t behave the way a grown-up should. Peter is stunted in his growth, holding on too tightly to his childhood, and Hook grew up too quickly and never really matured as a result. Wendy sees this pretty clearly and finds the balance between maintaining childlike wonder and growing into a respectable, responsible adult. If you make Peter into an often literal inhuman monster and Hook into the perfect hero, then Peter becomes totally incapable of ever choosing to grow up (even just emotionally, if not physically) and Hook doesn’t need to grow anymore because he’s already reached the end goal.

As for how/why things started between them…personally, I think Hook started it. As you said, he IS a pirate, after all. My guess is that he wanted something from the Lost Boys and/or Tink…information about a treasure, perhaps, or even just information about how to get off the island, as in some versions it seems he is trapped there…and Peter saw Hook threatening them and wasn’t having it. The only way I can figure that Peter managed to actually cut the hand off entirely is if Hook had fallen flat on some hard surface (rock?) that had very little to no give and Peter just…dropped like a stone from a great height, letting gravity really do its work and putting all his weight into it. And the only situation where I can see this happening is if Hook had a weapon in his hand that perhaps Peter was trying to knock back. I honestly don’t think it was intentional to cut the hand off. I suspect, knowing Peter’s tendency to make up stories about himself to make him sound more courageous and tough than he actually is, taking the hand clean off was an accident and when he went to pick up the discarded weapon, it was really only then he realized the hand was still attached. He flung it away in disgust and the crocodile just happened to be nearby. When Peter tells the story, though, he changes things up a bit. And Hook is too out of it from the blood loss and pain to really remember all the details so he believes Peter’s version of events that it was an intentional “prank” to cut off the hand and throw it to the crocodile.

[umm-the-thing]

I'm umm the thing, umm.. something, squeaky, or honestly anything!

PLEASE SEND ME ASKS. I BEG OF YOU. I MAY NOT RESPOND IMMEDIATELY BUT I WILL REALLY ENJOY IT!!!! ( @umms-weird-ask-thing )

IM A MINOR!!!!!!!

LGBTQ+

Pangender, asexual and pansexual!! (Woah!! Three things!!)

Please don't ask for donations, thanks!

(attempts to animate horribly)

I do all the arts all the days

(MY TAGS) #my art (or #ummdoesart) #umm has sans oc #ummdoesstuff (talking/doing random non-art things) #umm the thing reblogs #UMM APPROVED (sometimes with !!) for things I approve of. No further explanation.

#underturmoil (my main au ((I have not posted any of the story or many characters yet lol)))

(yeah, there's a few lmao)

Many UT AU'S!!!!!

Asks will probably take 2 days - 98 months for me to answer/hj

I love my online pookies!!!!

AND MY BELOVED WIFE, KILLER SANS

I'm sooooo cross

Love Rick and Morty, sonic, UNDERTALE!!!!, TMNT, FNAF, Pokemon, hazbin, helluva, CJdoesVA (I'm actually not sure about CJ does VA anymore, I've heard some bad things about him and the people he knows, but I'm not sure if they're true) SWIFTMITSUUU, portal, SPIDER-MAN!!!!!, DANDYS WORLD (my max floor is 17 and I've FINALLY SEEN ALL (ONLY BASSIE FOR HOLIDAY EVENTS) MAIN TWISTEDS!!!) and a lot more

LOVE MY MOOTS!! (/p implied every time)

Music is life 🫶

I'm very sloww

DOWN WITH AI ART!!!!!!!!!!

I ship (/PLATONIC)

DNI (when I say dni for certain things I'll make them a color, dni for those things means it's fine, please don't talk about it or show me anything that has to do with it though, it makes me VERY extremely uncomfortable and I don't wish to base your whole personality off of it)

Pro shippers

Sanscest (MULTIPLE PEOPLE HAVE TRIED TO EXPLAIN THIS TO ME, STILL NOT SURE IF I UNDERSTAND BUT THAT OKAY!!!!!) AND I SHIP SANSES. IF SANSCEST MEANS PLATONICALLY, TOO, ITS FINE. CUZ IM REAL DUMB AND I HAVE NO CLUE.

Against the lgbt community

Here to be a hater

Against furrys or therians

(y'all can hate, in SILENCE)

Too 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂 (I am too sometimes dw)

I have an alt account where I'm probably gonna start posting underturmoil stuff and I'll eventually make a reblog one, too

(I DID THIS BTW!!! @underturmoil @umm-does-reblogz )

I'm very awkward when talking to people, but I swear I won't kill ya!! (yet)

SONAS (up is underturmoil characters)

HER DESIGN IS NOT UPDATED. HER TAIL IS RED WITH BLACK AT THE BOTTOM. IT NEEDS TO BE FIXED.

(goop is technically part of my main sona, I mean, sorta. They're a different being who basically lives in her body, kinda like a parasite but not mind controlling or anything like that, just lives there)

(ALSO my (MAIN) sonas name is squeaky.)

IGNORE THIS BIT ALSHSVSJJSHAGSGDGDJDHHSGPAF

THANK FOR READING ALL OF IT!!!! HERE, TAKE MY DISCORD!!!! :3

[letheldosage]

it is 6am (7:30 at time of posting) and I really should be going back to sleep but I have made the impulsive decision to read fic instead and oh my GOSH I am kicking and screaming and SDSVHSDSADGNFHLK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i have never felt more attracted to Subaru in my LIFE. AO3 user stinkyturd i would die 4 u....

Fever Dreams, ch. 7 spoilers + liveblog (maybe I should go back to sleep and continue reading later LOL)

ignoring my big ass font. Possessive Subaru is sooooooo (giggles n twirls hair) I mean this has already been established cuz this fic has changed my perception of subaru Forever and my yandere loving freak ass is having the time of my LIFE each time he acts a little freaky but omggggg it's still so (sighs dreamily)... nothing will get watching him beat the shit out of Taiga out of jealousy

Like, I can't even blame reader for being like awww how sweet. He thinks he can protect me. AVSNDBDMDBM cuz suba is so... innocent(?)-coded? He projects a very submissive (and breedable //shot) image. But TBH the dichotomy just makes it hotter? Plus ignorance is bliss, yay ❤️

ALSO barking at being called good girl????? girl.... same. U get me fr (← guy who set one of the homicipher words to good girl 4 my delusions and had a feral moment in vc when it came up again last night)

i let out an ugly laugh at taiga calling Edward a creep. Edward is such a fascinating character even or perhaps because of his weirdness. Technically I need to grind twxt cuz of new limited cards but I really want to catch up to official tkdb story cuz that Obsc story pics I've seen are sheeeeesh (tugs at collar) (also I need to continue the auction chapter bc taiga calling me a wet cat made me swoon ASDDFSGJK like yeah 🥰 I'm Your pathetic stray cat)

TBH I know I'm a freak but it's a little embarrassing how into the whole blood thing I am now 😭 Ed flexing how much Taiga would have liked my blood should not be as hot as it is

NOOOOOOO NOT THE INSTAGRAM...... YN..... HE'S GOING TO SEE IT YN....! YN!!!!!!! (Read in the tone of the breaking bad Jesse meme)

KICKS MY FEET THE GIRLS ARE FIGHTINGGGGGGGGG (>///ヮ///<) aaa jealous taiga so sexy.... sighs dreamily.....

[littlestkoi-n]

a much too whiny rant about fic icks

I die a little every time pup, cub or Prongslet comes up in a wolfstar raising Harry (together or separately) fic. especially cub - it makes literally no sense????? are you sure it's Remus John Lupin I'm reading about??? it's his evil doppelganger, I'm telling you. I'm not even sure I could stomach that word ironically.

Prongslet is fine in moderation, I guess, but only as an inside joke, only coming from Sirius and only when Harry's a smol bean. but when it's Prisoner of Azkaban compliant I wanna claw my eyes out.

it's even worse when those terms are used not just in dialogue but in Remus or Sirius' internal monologue as if pup and cub are Harry's freaking pronouns or something. my cub, my pup, cub did this, pup did that... just call him boy or kid or his name for god's sake. I once saw sprog pop up and was delighted cuz at least it's actually british slang.

and don't get me started on Hadrian(us) James Orion Potter-Black (which is just... why the fuck would James give his son the name of his best mate's horrible father AND the last name of his horrible family?? and why would Lily agree to that?) who's simultaneously Lord Potter, Black, Peverell and Slytherin (and, sure, I have a visceral reaction to aristocracy wank in general but even ignoring that - the last 3 literally make no sense since "Lord Black" is Sirius until his death; and both Peverell and Slytherin lines bled into other families ages ago. so being a Potter automatically means you're descended from Peverells as well as being a Gaunt - from Slytherin. and the last of those is Tom Riddle Jr. but that wouldn't make any Potters "Lord Peverell"s or any Gaunts/Riddle "Lord Slytherin"s. those last names are dead. smh).

but, uh, this tangent technically has nothing to do with my initial complaints, it's just that at some point I started thinking of this naming stuff in tandem with nonsensical nicknames as they began appearing in fics together. which is a double homicide, truly.

and look, I definitely understand the desire to make Harry's original name something else cuz it fits nicely with POC Potters headcanon and Dursleys being racist dicks about it, but... Hadrian? I mean, it's not really a big deal when the fic mentions it being his full name but both narration and characters still refer to him as Harry for short - that makes total sense. however when after the name reveal Hadrian replaces Harry completely, it feels super weird and uncanny, making it hard to identify Harry's character in the story altogether.

although I guess you should all knock me off my high horse for being the biggest hypocrite ever, cuz I myself have a headcanon for Harry's name, even if it's less elaborate than Hadrian. also less Roman? that's another thing I don't get - if you want to create a better connection between Harry and his roots, why choose a name of a Roman emperor for a desi kid? since he's usually explicitly desi in all the Hadrian fics. so it's not that I have a problem with renaming him, per se, I just don't understand the choice of Hadrian.

for example, I recently read a fic where he was Pakistani and his name was originally Hami, which is a nice idea, actually, and makes sense for such headcanon. mine is Hari btw (हरि in Sanskrit), since I headcanon Potters as Indian, but I didn't come up with that name myself - just saw it somewhere a couple years ago and liked it. I think it's actually a pretty popular hc now? anyway, it's closer to Harry than any other name I've seen and has many beautiful meanings that resonate with what I think James and Lily felt towards their son. now, even though I still prefer his name being Harry regardless of ethnicity, I do entertain this silly headcanon from time to time - so yeah, I'm one to talk, boo me.

now, I probably should shut up since this rant has been entirely too negative already, but while I'm on the topic of icky names/nicknames I should circle back to wolfstar cuz gods know I'll never be brave enough to talk about this particular pet peeve in its own post.

Siri, Remu and Remy make my blood boil. Siri could be kinda cute when it's a silly childhood nickname from Regulus, but if any marauder or Lily calls Sirius that - immediate death. Si and Re are a teensy bit better in moderation and if used ironically, but still stab me in the chest. a couple times for good measure. the only somewhat acceptable short form of any of their two names for me is Rem, albeit with a stretch and only because it's an actual version of the name Remus in Catalan and Russian. I know I'm being way too dramatic about this (just like with all of my previous points) but I just don't understand the need to shorten their names. at all. they're only 3 and 2 syllables long and so mystical on their own that any shortening just makes them simultaneously more nonsensical and less remarkable.

both characters literally have established quirky nicknames in canon that you can play with and even shorten to Pads and Moons if you want. Sirius is not a digital assistant and Remus is not the main character from Ratatouille. stop this madness.

plus James is right there. his name has a ridiculous amount of diminutives - Jamie, Jimmy, Jim, Jam, Jem, Jay and even Jimbo if you're into that. why strip Remus and Sirius' magical names of their charm if you can have fun with common names? but I digress.

at the end of the day, my pet peeves are mine only and I should live with them in fragile peace. this post is a personal rant first and foremost and if you disagree, I'm genuinely happy that you enjoy the things I can't. fandom is a playground and we can all find some fun in different corners. I'd also like to point out that I'm not trying to take a jab at fic writers who use any of the aforementioned terms, names or diminutives. I'm only one person, so if I stop reading your work because of my petty biases, it's only my loss and not your problem. hundreds of other fans will enjoy it instead. so keep doing what you love and writing those characters however you want, it's your right!

so yeah, writers and readers - don't take it personally and have your fun! don't listen to me being mean! I'm just making my fandom experience way too convoluted for my own good.

[wiktorianala]

My oc's + characters they were based of in one way or another

I got bored of sewing, maybe gonna continue on weekend, but anyway i decided that it's time to make smthng more with Bouney 'n Handy so there's a lil drawings and if someone is interested in me yapping about them, story, 'n other stuffs then click here \/

Oki, so I'll start with at which point they were based of well, Salad and Madotsuki. Starting from Handy because this will take me less time. She was created waaay later, at moment when I wanted to start working on comic, so I had to make second character just so Bouney wouldn't be only one, well i wanted to make her an object head of some kind to match with the fact that Bouney's head was created out of rotated eye. It is not anymore but that was honestly how I created this little freak. Fine but coming back to topic I wanted to give her some kind of object, and I'm honestly shit when it come to making any decisions myself, so with my friend we just looked throught my entire sketchbook and we found drawing of Madotsuki with hand palm effect (because I was pretty much fixated over this game and bigger part of sketchbook had Yume Nikki drawings), so we just picked hand. Now, with Bouney it's longer story, just like I said, I created him way earlier, so first thing he got after Salad were simple plain clothes 'cuz I'm layzy and absolutelly didn't wanted to bother with drawing anything complicated over and over again (and I picked Salad, because once again, yes it was my fixation at that time, and I want to remind that thos are two different times btw). So at the point when I wanted to start making thos comics and when I already had character designs I had to give them personalities and story, and the story... it was pretty different from what it is now. First vershion of it was too about a empty world and all thos stuffs, this didn't change, but main difference was the fact that in earlier ver Bouney was only living creature in this world. Handy was more of some kind of imaginary friend that appeared in his head due to loneliness there. (this a bit was based out of Salad too, because, ya know, empty weird world, clearly not very sane main creature character 'n thos stuffs) Plot mostly was just like in current vershion pretty goofy 'n just some "everyday stuffs", but at some points it was getting pretty heavy and sad. AND YES I KNOW THAT IT SOUNDED MUCH MORE INTERESTING, honestly at some point even I liked it more in this way, but there were two main reasons why I changed it. First one, fact that Handy wasn't really a physical person caused some technical writing issues that maybe been not that hard to fix, but as once already I said- I'm layzy, so I didn't wanted to be bothered by them. And now second and honestly more important reason (at least for me), it was time when I was making 2nd re-write of "Fragments of Sanity" plot (rn I'm working on 3rd, and I hope last one, because I want to finally make it into comic too) and I mean first version of it was pretty, well sad (I can't really find better word for it), but on second version? Oh boy, let me tell ya this shit is even worse (and main reason for this is probably because I dunno when but Mike ended up being at least in his personality and behavior (not by plot) a bit of self insert). So I didn't really wanted both of my projects to be like that, and I wantd at least one of them to be one with wich I could more goof around, so yeah, I've changed it. Well I guess that's all I wanted to say? I dunno. I know that in 95% no one is about to read this, but anyway I feel at least better when I can yap somewhere about some certain stuffs, and hey, ain't that for what blogs even exist? For people to yap, and do stuffs they like? Damn after writing for such a long time about them I guess I have a need rn to finish this god damned 3rd chapter. So yeah, now that's all.

[habibisagi]

need your big sae thoughts!!! do you think sae gets around 🫣 since he’s technically a celebrity and professional athlete living abroad. i’d love to hear your take since i’ve seen some mixed opinions 🙏

okay so... TO ME... i don't think he does! or at least he doesn't get around in the way oliver (whore) does if that's what you're implying by "gets around" lmfao... as in does random hookups or casual sex, etc. i don't think sae can be casual about anything as much as he likes to act/show that he is, it only seems that way because he's emotionally distant on the outside.

it's probably surprising because sae is pretty arrogant but i don't think he is that way about having sex. i also don't think he fucks meaninglessly or just has sex to have sex in general. i don't think he cares enough for his pleasure like that (if at all LOL).

(also it's canon that he's not into what most pro-athletes want when they get famous like getting game, girls and all that. i mean he humbled tf out of sendou for that because it's very shallow to see that as an extent to one's career high lmfao)

i really think sae values meaningful relationships (doesn't necessarily have to be labeled) where he will genuinely be of use to the other person in more ways than one (and it doesn't have to be physical btw), even if he won't directly admit that often. he cares for the other person wordlessly and again he's not the type to just fuck solely for his pleasure (yours though? different story).

i think he fucks good regardless though. maybe cuz of like. past relationships where he's had the experience of making someone cum and cuz he's just crazy and naturally good at reading body language on the field as is, during sex it would be no different. if not easier.

and i think he's double good at it because in just making you cum he doesn't have to get emotionally vulnerable/confront anything </3 focusing on making you cum is quite the escape route for sae a lot of the time i fear </3 also he likes being needed and providing in general; it's the older brother in him rip so that is inevitable and just goes double anyway.

i do think he's perfect for fwb though for this reason (if you're into that). except... sae is just a friend there for Your benefit. no benefits for him that he needs otherwise, he doesn't care much to cum at all usually. so yeah he wouldn't mind being someone there for your pleasure. wouldn't mind being used by you, being your... boy toy. whatever you want. if you need it. idk I JUST THINK HE'S A HUUUUGE PLEASER IN THIS ASPECT however the relationship

tldr; NOPE

[britcision]

Alright, it’s time to talk about Lycion and dysmorphia and being a trans allegory

Because… yeah, I think a lot of people can really relate to being scared of mirrors because you hate everything you see in them, and going to extreme lengths to get a body you love

It’s not a complicated allegory

But, and I think this is pretty important and possibly more useful to the trans community than declaring him ours and trans… dysmorphia and dysphoria are not exclusive to trans people

They’re not even particularly related to any part of the body; it can be any part of it

And like 15 years ago when I was learning about trans issues and shit, I went and did a little research, because I eat knowledge. And y’know what fully settled any questions I had?

Found a case about a lady with what is currently being called body integrity/identity disorder, which is basically dysmorphia so severe that people have otherwise healthy limbs amputated to be able to live life in a body they can stand

This lady got both legs fully amputated, got a wheelchair, and became a pillar of her community where before she was almost bed bound

And y’know what, if that’s a thing that can happen and we can all agree that removing her legs was integral to her health, y’know what seems completely trivial by comparison?

Every gender affirming surgery ever

And y’know what is even more trivial?

All the other transition measures that have nothing to do with surgery, like hormones, puberty blockers, and social transitioning

Being trans has become a super political idea for basically no reason whatsoever, but it’s harder to maintain that ideology if you learn about things like dysphoria and dysmorphia as just medical conditions that absolutely anyone can get, and then look at what that means for gender dysphoria

Cuz if peoples’ brains can decide an entire limb has Got To Go then yeah, they’re probably also capable of deciding “that pronoun is Wrong” and we can take that just as seriously; it’s a much easier fix and also free

Basically I’m saying Lycion is our gateway drug cuz if you can understand this elf hates his body so hard he became a werewolf about it, are you really gonna throw a fit over someone getting a packer?

None of this to say you can’t or shouldn’t headcanon him as trans (and unless it comes directly and unambiguously from Ryoko Kui it’s a headcanon, nothing wrong with that it’s what fanon is for)

Just, y’know. Sound folks out on him without mentioning that part right away for your own safety and possibly entertainment 😁👉👉

Oh and super important: he’s not canonically cis either. Pretty sure it was just never specified. Enjoy and apply this knowledge across every character ever whose assigned birth gender isn’t brought up in canon

The thing Lycion definitely is in canon is a goddamn furry and an otherkin allegory, and arrested for awoo crimes. He’s one of only 5 characters in the Adventurer’s Bible with a stated gender (the others being Otta, Kaka, Kiki, and Inutade - everyone else has pronouns but no gendered nouns in English at least)

(Lycion’s “definitely a man” - or “definitely male” in the official translation, which technically excludes him from the gendered committee altogether)

You are, of course, welcome to disregard canon in all things you do - I personally encourage it, it’s much more fun to play in the space and do your own thing, and Dunmeshi has deliciously efficient story telling; there is so much empty space to play in

[xxxnightcorequeenxxxv3]

Details: Barbara Metal: White Gold Gem: Painite Gem Cut: Marquise Flower: Aster X Frikartii 'Mönch'

Details: Cassandra Metal: Palladium Gem: Taaffeite Gem Cut: Heart Flower: Tiger lily

Details: Stephanie Metal: Copper Gem: Citrine Gem Cut: Assher Flower: Carnation ---

Okay, so need to know story-wise, yes, there are going to be 13 of them, that's what we landed on (I got ppl hyping and suggesting this)

One reason is that 13 is a bad number in fairy tales (think Sleeping Beauty, with Maleficent being the 13th fairy), and the 13th princess will be a pain for the rest of them to deal with. (But spoiler on who that is for now.) They are not counted in age order as Princesses, but when they show up in the story. So even though Jay should be the first princess (Crown Princess), as he was adopted first, he's not; he's 3rd. In princess order of the ones I've shown so far, we got 1st Dick 2ed Babs 3rd Jay 4th Tim 5th Stef 6th Dami 7th Cas 8th Duke The others are secret for now, but planned. I will also disclose that I am listing flowers, meanings, and the like because they have a meaningful story about the character and who they are. For example, the height of the crown's middle spike indicates which princess is older than the others. So, traditionally in the isekai story, the crown princess is supposed to have the tallest and most valuable crown. But the King (Bruce), like his counterpart outside the Isekai world, cannot get kids in "normal order." Also, though the staff is calling them all the 13 princesses, technically, not all of them are, but everyone in the kingdom knows they are basically what they are and treats them as such.

Back story for Richael (before Dick took here place in the story) made friends with the Marquess's daughter (hence me giving Babs a Marquise cut gem), and the King is fostering her temporarily. (He just wanted his ward to have a friend.) Yeah, you heard me right, Richael is adopted after Jasolin. But someone on staff (*cough* Alfred *cough*) saw what would happen and had already commissioned a tiara for Richael with a newer metal (cuz you know step up from gold) but with the traditional diamond gem. (Emerald, Sapphire, and Ruby are the next step down traditionally; they are equal) Jasolin, therefore, has a gem that's more traditional for a 2nd, 3rd, or 4th princess may have. (Also, it's a teardrop/pear-shaped and Green, cheeky pit reference, but also because Bruce will have a similar cut but older in style.) Stephanie, however, is Timothya's BFF. Stef's father is now a disgraced (noble) felon, so they devised a plan to get her away from him. (So he couldn't use her as a bargaining chip, etc.) That's why her dress and jewelry are slightly off. Of course, they are all pulled together as pieces to make her look like they were intentional. The dress is slightly too big. No, the cut is intentional, and the ribbons on it are fashionable. Citrine is an older cut; it's not the first time a princess has chosen this stone, and having a classic cut is no shame. Makes it stand out from the rest of the other princesses as it should. They 100% play it off, so it takes (Bruce) a while to notice she's living there, not just visiting, and once he does, it's too late to take it back. Stef is now a princess. Damiana is the King's bio child, so I plan on them having some similarities, such as their flowers both being roses (so yeah, 14 portraits, also the flowers are a call back to personalities). Dami's mother does not live with them, though. But one detail you may have noticed is that Damiana has Pearls (a call back to the late Queen Martha, as she was fond of them.) Some details I hid are more interesting than others, as it's not supposed to be historically accurate. Just some Isekai writer's cobbled-together idea of what would look nice and make sense at a passing glance. Not to mention the isekai gets bat-infused since 5 of the bat kids got stuck in an isekai loosely inspired by the "12 dancing princesses." Dami got in a bulk lot of stuff. So the spell is causing a temporal anomaly. (but hush on that, more on that later, spoiler for the next princesses not drawn yet.)

And I may confirm if you guess the processes 9 to 13 correctly. But for now, this post is getting too long for me to ramble on about them.

[avionvadion]

How does el feel about the boys who did attempted murder in the main story? Riddle, Leona, Vil (technically Jamil cuz he yeeted Kalim and Octavinelle so they can freeze to death?)

I think El’s feelings on Riddle are pretty clear in the fic. El has MANY mixed feelings about Leona, because she wanted to be friends with him since he helped her but then he nearly killed her and then he actually sort of protects her during the dreams by keeping her in one place, so self-aware that he’s stopping her from wandering more memories and consequently preventing the curse from growing, so he’s helping her again, just like he did when they first met, and it’s frustrating. They also just recognize each other. They recognize each other’s depression. They recognize that they’re both so tired.

That’s the first thing Eleanora ever noticed about Leona, his exhausted eyes. Eleanora hides her depression better than Leona does (outwardly, at least, as she keeps most of her negative thoughts to herself, until she zones out and her “bad thoughts face” starts showing) because unlike Leona, Eleanora hasn’t completely given up. And seeing the horrors of his childhood, she’s witnessing how he became this way.

And she clocks why he’s doing what he is. That what he’s attempting during the Inter-dorm Tournament isn’t some actual clever scheme, but a last ditch effort, a final hurrah, before he cuts himself out of the pages of history. He’s so suicidal at this point it’s actually heartbreaking and it’s upsetting that most people diss on Book Two because it doesn’t properly explore that fact.

Leona and Eleanora have the MOST complicated relationship out of all the OB boys.

And, during Playful Land, he is also the only one who takes her warnings seriously and when she points out something is wrong (like the clouds are moving too fast) Leona immediately goes to check it out and takes charge, calling a group huddle and discussing the situation and how to handle it with Vil and Eleanora’s inputs.

Also, I believe I made this clear on many posts, but Eleanora absolutely hates Jamil and has the biggest most unforgiving grudge towards him. (Jamil lovers I promise I mean no ill will I just like making situations SO MUCH WORSE and the Scarabia arc has such prime material to do so) and he actually ends up getting a double edged blessing/curse from Malleus. (Not saying what it is yet mwahahahaha. It’s not really something bad, but definitely will be frustrating for Jamil when or if he ever figures it out)

Azul is forgiven, but just barely.

As for Vil, Vil has done the LEAST amount of harm to El during the battle. He’s also helped her out a few times before. I guess Vil and Eleanora have the third most complicated relationship??? Because he was there at Playful Land, seen El die, and yet cursed the Trey snacks without consulting her about it- which could have KILLED her if she ate them, which only further added to Vil’s stress because he’s realizing how illogically he’s thinking and how unlike himself he’s behaving and how he’s taking some of his frustration towards Neige on Eleanora because she has such a similar face to him and it’s obvious he’s not doing okay but he’s so used to bottling everything up he won’t talk to Eleanora or even Rook about it. Is very complicated.

But El isn’t mad at Vil for Overblotting, she’s just kinda sad. She doesn’t hold a grudge either (except about the Trey snacks, DO NOT TOUCH HER TREY SNACKS) because no one was severely hurt and they stopped Vil before any harm could actually come to Neige, and they KNOW he wasn’t in his right mind because as soon as they stopped him he became so damn horrified with himself, and was also one of the rare few who actually APOLOGIZED for everything.

So Vil is chill.

But YEAH. Is very complicated.

[littlelovelyspiderling]

So I don't technically consider myself to be a part of the CR fandom because I've never consumed any of the source material, but GOD do I love reading CR tk fics 👁👁 I've read enough mighty nein tk fics at this point that I have a general feel of the characters. I had a whole widomauk phase and everything lol. I'll admit Essek is one I'm less familiar with, but I do know and love our dear wizard :)

oh dang i gotta go look through the tags cuz i actually haven’t read very many!! i was so focused on writing my own lol. good to know im contributing to a not totally empty fandom 😅 but yeah let’s just say the short story i threw together is VERY mean to essek 😈and caleb is all 😳💞 anyone that prim and proper & courtly needs to have their shit wrecked sorry i don’t make the rules 🤷🏼‍♀️

[what-if-i-just-did]

Guilt & Revenge: Hallucinations

Whumpcember, Day 4: Hallucinations

Guilt & Revenge Masterlist

Awww look it's Amber's very first time being tortured! I loved writing this but now I don't have a buffer anymore... whoops. I hope you enjoy, lmk if you wanna be added to the taglist! I also wanted to say that, although I won't be adding it to the tw's since it's not really noticable in the story, this is TECHNICALLY minor whump cuz at this point in the story Amber is still seventeen.

Taglist: @silentlysurffering98

TWs: captivity (on a boat), hallucinations, sensory deprivation (tied down + blindfold), muzzle, sea sickness, messed up sense of time, off-screen abduction, mention of ADHD and hunger

Amber tried to fight back while they tied him up, but Paul and Eileen were just stronger than him, especially with him being exhausted as fuck. He could barely even struggle when they muzzled, and blindfolded him. He cursed them out and yelled at them, but it made no difference at all. Then, once he was secured to the bed, if you could even call it that, he heard them leave.

His mind was racing. This was sure to be the first of many tortures he would be forced to endure. From what they’d told him, they seemed to be starting easy. Maybe he would get lucky and everything would remain this basic, and everything they’d mentioned had just been hyperbole and bluff. Sensory deprivation was easy enough… for now.

Amber couldn’t tell how long it took time to pass. Everything seemed to be taking an eternity, but any time he tried to think about how long it might have been, it only felt like a few minutes. His thoughts drifted everywhere- movies, things that had been said, his childhood, how fucked up this situation was, his friends. It was almost like normal nights when he got lost in thought, occasionally chuckling at how ADHD his mind was. The rope binding him and the uncomfortably warm leather of the muzzle strapped to his face reminded him that it was not at all the same. He didn’t even know if it was night at all.

He thought of Noah-Elise. He thought of the painting she gave him that he’d been meaning to hang up. He thought of Trevor’s recent idea of adding alcoholic milkshakes and slushies to the menu at Tipped, and how Dave had actually taken it seriously. He thought about how neither of his parents would have ever done that, taken him seriously like that, if they’d even theoretically had a business like that. He thought about the first months after he moved out, how grateful he was, how he could finally start living his own life, how Dave and Zander had supported him in ways his biological parents never had. He thought about his family, his real family, his FOUND family. He thought of Jake. If Jake was here, he would have been able to overpower them. They would be out by now… and Jake would be pissed.

The bobbing of the boat was making him nauseous, especially without his sight. He had no idea where he was- he just knew it was on a boat, which seemed to be home-renovated specifically for him to have a cell. He knew.. actually, yeah, he should put together everything he knew. He knew the boat was bigger than the cell. He could only see the other half of the room he was in, but he knew there was more. He had no idea what body of water the boat was in. He didn’t even know if he was still in the same state- Hell, he could be in Canada for all he knew. 

Suddenly, a sound brought him out of his thoughts. Footsteps, right next to him- but he hadn’t heard anyone enter the boat, hadn’t heard the boat they'd left in returning. Had they actually left? How long had it been? “Who’s there?” He tried to sound demanding, but ended up sounding like a scared little kitten trying to roar. 

Nobody answered. Nobody came close to him. It was silent.

He was sure there’d been a sound. Right? He was sure?

He was sure.

….

He wasn't sure.

What if there hadn’t been a sound? Was he going insane? How long in complete solitude, unable to see or move, would it take for someone to become insane? How long had it been? Thirty minutes, six days? More, less? How could he know? He didn’t fucking know! He was hungry. So, maybe just a few hours. When was the last time he ate? He was hungry when he was abducted, too. Did they give him food? He had no clue. Couldn’t remember.

He heard something, in the corner, like water dripping. He turned his head towards the sound, but it made no difference- the simple fabric of the blindfold robbed him of his sight. 

Was he imagining it? Or might the boat have a leak? Would they leave him here long enough to drown? He tried to struggle against his restraints again, but found his limbs feeling weak and hollow. It was a feeling he knew intimately during his childhood, the feeling you get when you haven’t eaten in a day or so too long. He thought there might be black spots in his vision, which would help him further narrow down how long he’d gone without food, but being blindfolded and all, he couldn’t quite tell. 

Tears formed puddles by his eyes, and he shook his head wildly to try to get them away, since his hands were tied. The movement made his head feel incredibly light.

Amber inhaled sharply as he awoke. What? No. He hadn’t been asleep. 

Shit… 

Shaking his head had made him pass out. Fuck. For how long? 

Seconds? Minutes? Hours?

More?

Time trickled past him, like the water softly finding it’s way from the pile of snow it melted from. Time was thundering past, trying to drown him, like he was stuck in a large waterfall, making it hard to breathe. Time was wind, playing with leaves on the other side of the room. 

Why could he hear wind? There was no wind in the windowless cell in the belly of a boat in an unknown location.

There wasn’t any firewood to be crackling, making him flinch with how close it sounded to his face.

There wasn’t any marble for high heels to click on, and nobody was walking around him.

There wasn’t… he didn’t think there was a clock, driving him mad with the needless precise ticking, but there might have been. 

The last thing he’d been focused on yesterday was if there was a clock or not. He wished he had, even fleetingly, noticed if there was.

There weren’t any animals growling in his ear. There really, simply, just weren’t.

He heard them all anyway.

Amber felt parched. He was so, so thirsty. He was hungry, too, but fuck he needed water. He’d do anything for a glass of water. The tears stopped at some point, he couldn’t tell when. Time was a haze. His mouth felt like a goddamn desert. He wanted to cry.

How long had it been? Two days? Five? Seven? Would they leave him like this to die? How long did he have left if he was left this way? 

What if it had only been hours? Was it possible to get this thirsty, this hungry, in less than a day? Was he delusional? If they came back, would they ever tell him how long it had been? Would he ever know? 

Fuck, he hated them so much. He felt so helpless, tied down to an uncomfortable-as-shit bed. He wanted to beat them up and get the hell out of this place. He felt so seasick, he was honestly surprised he hadn’t thrown up. He wanted the police, or Jake, or Dave, or hell, he’d settle for Lore or even his father,  to bust down the doors, rip off his blindfold, untie him, and get him out. He wanted out.

He heard it, a few times. Voices in the distance that he recognised- Jake, or Noah-Elise, or his friends, or Dave, or some combination. Someone opening the cell door. Sirens. Sounds that indicated he was being saved, alongside the other sounds. The random ones. 

The fire and the clock and the growling.

His whole body felt numb. He was slipping in and out of consciousness, or maybe he was falling asleep. Where was the boundary between excessive thought and dream? It was dark before his eyes either way. He couldn’t move, and it felt like circulation to his legs had been cut off. Maybe they were turning blue and purple and black and falling off. He didn’t know.

Amber didn’t know. He was going fucking insane, and he was stuck. He couldn’t do anything.

He just wanted to go home.

[randomlywanderingmoth]

FANSERVANT: Caster of Blessings

(picture created in picrew)

SERVANT CLASS: "Are- are you seriously asking that? Go back up the header and read that again." ALTERNATIVE NAMES: Kat. "Kat for the English speakers. Phonetically sounds like Cat. Yes I'm human, these are just a funny blessing." Neko-chan. "Neko-chan for the Japanese speakers, cuz Neko means Cat, heheh." Emma. "Wait, how the heck do you know that? I mean- it IS my name, and I don't mind you using it, but… that's the name of my Pseudo half… I mean, I guess if you're referring to the very normal human me, then that's fine I guess?"

TRUE NAME: "- woah woah woah hold on a hot minute here, I was gonna do a whole song and dance! Lemme have this!" True Name information presently sealed. "Thank you, dossier."

===

"Anyway, let's rip the band-aid off now, I'm a Pseudo-Servant. To make an extraordinarily long story short, I was a Master in a Grail War, and Caster was my Servant. A whole buncha buncha stuff happened, and I ended up inheriting her Saint Graph. Obviously, I didn't have the cat-ears or cat-tail prior to inheriting my Saint Graph. Don't worry about them too much."

"Oh- oh right, I should give a long-form description of what my deal is. Anyway, I'm the Caster of Blessings. I was gonna be cagey and tell you to call me Kat, but since the dossier blew my cover yeah you can call me Emma. I'm a hedge mage- was a hedge mage- that got tangled up in a Grail War. I ended up summoning the original Caster of Blessings, the one that wouldn't have been a Pseudo-Servant. We bonded, as people do, and I learned that she… didn't exactly like being the Caster of Blessings. It almost didn't matter, except that it turned out I was also compatible to hold that Saint Graph."

"Anyway, at one point… well, my memories are a jumble. I blame either the Throne or the Kaleidoscope, maybe both, but either she gave it to me after taking a fatal wound to let me keep being in the Grail War because she found my wish beautiful, or I took a fatal wound and she sacrificed her life to infuse me with her Saint Graph so I could survive, or I ended up waking up to my own potential as a Mage and we won the Grail and her half of the wishes on the Grail was to let go of her Saint Graph and it peeled off her and stuck to me… I'm rambling, sorry. Presumably, every path in the Kaleidoscope that lead to me becoming the Pseudo-Servant holding her Saint Graph merged, hence my jumbled memories. Presumably there's also memories in there of me being the Caster of Blessings that I summoned, but I'm thankful to be deprived of those memories in this summoning- I don't need that existential recursive headache, please and thanks."

"As the bearer of her Saint Graph, I incidentally also inherited her memories. And, lemme tell ya, I get why she wanted to leave. How many years, decades, centuries, millennia, do you think you could spend, trying to help people? How long can you work, in- I was gonna say in a Sisyphean effort, but even Sisyphus would object to this. I remembered all of it. All the effort, to try to help Humanity. To fix the mess I made- er, she made. Erm- disregard that."

"Anyway, as the Caster of Blessings, her job was as the name implies. To travel the world, to impart blessings unto humanity. To help fix the problems of the people, then to flee when they learned those problems were, on some level, her fault in the first place. Before you ask, no, her legend will never make mention of any of this, I wouldn't be saying it all if I thought it would."

"Anyway, she traveled, as you do, blessed people, as she could, and learned that… well, it's remarkably difficult to permanently quash the darker natures of humanity. She would say impossible, but I've a pedantic mindset to say it technically isn't impossible. But anyway. To give humans wealth is to invite greed, to give them talent is to rouse envy. Attempting to reconcile conflict only planted grudges to incite further outrage. Perhaps none of those in the moment, but given time, good things seem reluctant to ever last. The apple will always find its way to rot in the end."

"Eventually, she gave up. Because of course she did. Because you can say that, after seeing every attempt to help people crumble and fail, you would still keep trying, but immortality does not typically include immortal determination and willpower. Those are still very mortal, and, trust me, after thousands of years your resolve would also falter."

"One day, though, she met someone. Or, someone met her… the memories are difficult here. That someone didn't want to be remembered, if I had to guess- but anyway. They suggested a simple idea to her. The living person can retire, and her ever unending self-appointed task can be left to her memories. Engrave her existence on the Throne of Heroes."

"… she had the tiniest sliver of resolve left, and it was enough to do this final deed. To leave her task to a Saint Graph. But the Ghost Liner who held that Saint Graph, for a time, was her. Her memories, given form. Still uncontent. Still left to meekly tend the ever-turning nature of humanity."

"And then she was summoned to a silly Grail War by a silly girl with silly aspirations that were barely alive. And that silly girl wanted… so many things. And the Caster of Blessings had one more blessing that she hadn't ever given before, not in this way."

"And so, the original Caster of Blessings took her final retirement, and her erstwhile Master was stepped up to the line. The Pseudo-Servant, Caster of Blessings. That's me."

PARAMETERS:

Strength: E+ "… what's with that look? I'm a Caster. Base STR is what you get." Endurance: D+ "Wow, even as a Caster I have better than base Endurance. Neat." Agility: C+ "I know I have cat motifs going on but I am also a Caster. Be glad you got this." Mana: A+ "Don't be fooled, I can actually blow through my mana supply in a real hurry if I mismanage it." Luck: B- "My luck is actually pretty okay. That malus? I have a faint-but-constant urge to Test My Luck, and you don't need a bad luck streak to get screwed over, you just need one really bad hit." Noble Phantasm: EX "Okay so we can get back to this if I ever I pull out my True Name but even without it, the Noble Phantasm that I DO make regular use of is also still EX rank. It's pretty buckwild."

SKILLS:

"Now, disclaimer, I'm not giving you the proper names of my Skills. Those are sealed up along with my True Name. Don't worry, you'll still get an idea of my deal from the listed."

Item Construction (B+ Rank): "My primary Magecraft allows me to command, manipulate, and reinforce thread and fabric essentially at will. You'd be surprised how strong and durable cotton yarn is when reinforced by such high level Magecraft. It's a point of note, I can't just use straight fabric like shirts or jackets, but if I can unravel the yarn from like a scarf, I always have a weapon. And yes, the stuff I make is quantifiably powerful. Cool magic swords and axes, suits of armor? As long as I have enough thread, sure. The original Caster of Blessings was a lot more deft with this, but I'm capable enough in my own right."

Territory Creation (A- Rank): "I'm also able to delineate and define a 'home' territory, making it my Workshop- and it's a pretty ridiculously powerful Workshop at that, Temple-grade. The only issue, aside from the ritual to delineate that Temple, is that I can only denote one 'home' at a time. Make a new one? Old one stops being a Temple. Pretty sure there's some mythology somewhere about cats being protectors of homes. That's my excuse for now, anyway."

Presence Concealment (B+ Rank): "Ever seen a cat get sneaky? Yeah, I can do that pretty good. What's funny is, even if I get into a fight, if I just put a bit of mana into maintaining my concealment, I don't lose ranks after entering combat like standard Presence Concealment! Ever tried fighting someone your mind refuses to stick to? It's buckwild."

Golden Rule (C Rank): "Ah, erm… quick come up with something- right, y'know those Japanese lucky cats? Maneki-Neko? Sure, this is totally based on that. Anyway, it's not that I have cash, it's that I have, let's say, a remarkable talent for falling into wealth as needed."

Natural Body (A Rank): "Neat, huh? I get pluses to my STR, END, and AGI stats cuz of this, and my body is way more fit than it was when I was alive! Bonus, hostile effects that would negatively impact those stats don't work unless they can bypass this skill! No half measures were taken in the creation of the Caster of Blessings, and that sure as heck is reflected in this skill!"

Clairvoyance (A- Rank): "A byproduct of my Noble Phantasm, my eyes can even theoretically perceive the future if I try! The, uh, the minus is because… I'll take the blame on this, pretty sure original Caster never had this problem, but I'm not as good at controlling it. I can restrain it, and I can use Mystic Eye Killers on it to basically turn it off so it isn't quite so distracting, but… I'll be honest, I give full props to all the Servants who can use a skill like this on the fly, no problem. Clairvoyance is not nearly the free win that I used to think it was."

Divinity (B Rank): "Oh if I didn't have this it'd be real freakin' funny when I started passing around blessings like candy. The only reason I'm not A Rank is because my Saint Graph doesn't make it to god level, and both the original and I take serious umbrage with that. I mean, after everything she's done, hasn't she earned the right to return to- ah, sorry, nearly spilled the beans there, eheheh."

NOBLE PHANTASM:

Fatal Curiosity: Mystic Eyes of Observation

"Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back. That's the whole phrase, by the way. Bet you've only heard the first half, heheh."

"Anyway, my eyes are capable of completely deconstructing the information presented to it in nearly any situation. A single glance and I can fully discern anything about anyone. Presence Concealment, True Name Concealment, Illusions, and similar effects basically mean nothing to me. I can read off nearly everything about any Servant or similar hostile in a matter of seconds. True Name, Parameters, Favorite Ice Cream Flavor, Skills, Fears and Weaknesses, Noble Phantasms, so on and so forth. It's a matter of seconds and not instantly because I need a bit to process and filter out the junk data from the tasty stuff, but the more mana I pump into it the faster the processing goes. At full power, yeah, it's basically instant."

"Speaking of stuff I can process instantly, the moment I see any sort of hostile action- an attack, a directed curse, a trap, or so on, my Mystic Eyes will instantly process and provide autonomous countermeasures. Oh, and bonus? If it's Magecraft, my Eyes will reverse-engineer it basically automatically. As in, if I see Magecraft used, I can use it too. Sadly, I can't take the information from previous summonings, and it's only the information of my Pseudo-Servant self, so I don't have all of humanity's Magecraft at my fingertips, but it's still a whole lotta lot to work with."

"Oh- that all does take a bit of a toll on mana, but even at rest my Eyes are constantly processing information- just at a slower rate than near-instant. At rest I could tell you the weak spots in the local construction or geography, I could autonomously counter minor Magecraft, I can even read minds. Or- rather, I have to. The Eyes never fully power down. It's… rather distracting at times, so I wear the glasses to turn it off when it's not needed."

"No secrets, no deceptions, nothing may be hidden from my eyes. Let us bear witness, together, to what happens next- FATAL CURIOSITY."