#“who hurt you?” oh COME ONE WHAT SHOW AM I WATCHING.
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r you still open for requests? if so and if you havent done this, stan twins taking care of reader on their period? im on my period rn and i lowkey am craving for it,, /nf!!
❥ Stan & Ford taking care of you on your period headcanons <3
a/n: oh anon this one's for you and for everyone dealing with the struggle right now <333 may ur cramps be mild 🙏
STANLEY
★ “what do you mean you feel like garbage?? you were fine an hour ago! what happened?? who do I have to fight??” and when you explain, he just. OH. THAT.
★ “okay, okay, don’t freak out, but,” he digs around in some closet and pulls out a very old hot water bottle. “this thing got me through some rough winters. i hope this will, uh. . . stop the angry uterus thing.”
★ if anyone (Soos, Dipper, some poor clueless tourist) makes a dumb joke about “mood swings,” Stan will protect you. “oh, you think that’s funny? let’s see how funny it is when I lock you in the Mystery Shack bathroom for a week with no toilet paper!”
★ will not let you lift a finger. so worried about your state he physically shoves you back down if you try to do anything. “nope. nope, nuh-uh, baby, don’t even think about it.”
★ if you're dying from pain and nothing helps, he just holds you close while dramatically saying “oh sweetheart, if only nature was FAIR, it’d be me bleeding instead! why this world is so unfair????”
★ of course he buys you snacks. SO MANY SNACKS. he heard somewhere that chocolate helps, so now he’s bought four different brands of cheap chocolate bars from the gas station
“uh, i got these. one of ‘em’s gotta be the magic one, right?”
★ “old man Mcgucket says bark tea fixes everything. should we. . . should we try bark tea?”
★ once Stanley pulled out a beer and immediately regretted it. “. . . wait, no, that’s for me.”
★ ofc he cooks for you. he’s a big believer that food fixes all things, even if he doesn’t understand the science of it. makes you the heartiest, greasiest, most filling meal he can. you might not even want it but it’s the intent. it's the love. (and if you actually ask for something? he’ll make it with no hesitation)
★ you look even slightly like you’re in pain?? immediate concern. hunched over? “alright, that’s it, you’re going on the couch.” he literally herds you over with his hands on your shoulders, forces you to get comfortable. “c'mon, c'mon, up ya go. feet up. blanket on. there ya go.”
★ lovingly teases you when you cry over dumb stuff, but only a little. “you're cryin’ over a commercial? sweetie, c’mon.” wipes your tears anyway. kisses your forehead after.
★ grocery store trip. Stanley standing in the feminine hygiene aisle, he calls you from the store like, “baby, what the hell is ultra-thin? why are there WINGS on these? you gonna fly away or somethin’? :(”
★ i have a feeling he'll get the wrong ones. Stan comes home proud of himself only for you to be like Stan these are panty liners. he’s FLABBERGASTED. “they were in the same aisle!! they had the same stupid pink packaging!!”
★ eventually, he settles into his caretaking mode, ruffles your hair, makes bad jokes to make you laugh even when you feel awful. if you get emotional from the hormones he panics a little but ultimately just lets you cry on his shoulder and pats your back
★ mutters “alright, where’s it hurt, lemme at it.” then massages your lower back, rubs your stomach clumsily but gently. Stan is determined to physically get rid of your pain somehow even if that’s not how it works
★ makes you rest by putting on a movie and forcing you to stay put. he picks the weirdest mix of old action flicks, crime shows and one sappy romance he swears he doesn’t like. (he totally does.)
★ if you’re in pain he's gonna fix it. but since he can’t punch your uterus, he does the next best thing. distracts the hell outta you. "alright, sweetheart, what’s it gonna be? poker? tall tales? let's watch duck detective?”
you giggle. “Stan, just cuddle me.”
“oh, yeah, you got it, c’mere.” immediately pulls you onto his lap, wrapping his big arms around you, rocking his most precious thing in the world.
★ if you're up at 2 AM, restless from cramps, Stan notices immediately “owwh, doll, let’s getcha comfy.” guides you to the couch, sets you up with a blanket, turns on some quiet late-night TV. he stays up with you, spending sleepless night taking care of you. he sits there, rubbing your back, making sure you’re okay
in some hours more though, he falls asleep next to you, head leaning against yours
STANFORD
★ HE KNOWS BEFORE YOU DO. this man has studied interdimensional quantum phenomena. you think he hasn’t mapped out your cycle like a scientist mapping the tides???? PLEASE
“sweetheart, shouldn’t you be starting your period soon?”
“what? no?? I feel fine“ and twenty minutes later, you’re in pain
“ah. as I suspected.” Ford says
★ literally tracks it like a researcher. has a whole-ass journal with little notes. estimates symptoms, cravings, moods. he says it's because “I want to be prepared for you”.
you catch him writing in it one day. “Ford, what is that?”
he looks guilty and awkward. “a. . . documentation of your menstrual cycle?”
you take it, open it and your eyes widen. it got a whole-ass formula for predicting your moods
“wtf Ford, you made a menstrual algorithm??”
he rubs the back of his neck. “well, i wanted to ensure that i could be fully prepared for any and all symptoms—“
you’re just staring at the notes, not even listening to him. “did you seriously track that I crave sour candy more than chocolate???”
Ford pushes up his glasses. “i prefer to call it an empirical observation, yes.” next thing you do is kiss him senseless, because this nerd is the most devoted man on the planet
★ i assure you, he's already stocked up. you go to grab something and oh . . . heating pad? already plugged in. pain meds? already out on the counter. ur favorite snacks? somehow already bought. tea? brewing
★ of course! of course you'll get his lectures about periods. “did you know that menstrual cramps are caused by the uterus contracting due to prostaglandins? i read a fascinating study on ways to mitigate the pain—“ but let me tell you, he’s rambling because he’s nervous about you hurting. also because he thinks knowledge = comfort
★ his gentle hands, always. adjusting your blanket. rubbing slow circles into your back. fingertips ghosting over your forehead to check if you’re feverish
★ absolutely 100%, without a doubt, Ford takes notes on what helps you. if you ever say something like “ugh, this tea actually helps a lot” he writes that down. if you offhandedly mention “i think dark chocolate makes it better” he’s buying you ten bars of it next time.
★ he tries to keep you distracted. puts on old sci-fi movies and nerds out over them. reads aloud from a book if you want because he knows you love his voice
“did I ever tell you about the time I discovered a species that only reproduces once every ten years?” he just TALKS to you. calmly. thoughtfully. lets his voice carry you away from the pain.
★ he will stay up with you if you can’t sleep. even if he’s exhausted, even if he has research to do. if you’re in pain, he’s right there. “sleep, darling. I’ll stay up for a while. you need to rest.” strokes your hair until you do and presses a kiss to your temple when you finally drift off.
★ Ford can’t stand inefficiency. the first time he hears you complain about normal period products, he rubbed his chin, thinking. you’re uncomfortable??? with a problem that science could potentially solve???
“hmph. there must be a better way.” he disappears into his lab for hours.
★ what he makes depends on what you complain about! hate pads? “ah. they’re inefficient, bulky and uncomfortable. yes, darling, I see the flaws.”
hate tampons? “too absorbent, prone to leaking at unpredictable rates. . . fascinating, but flawed.”
cramps?? “prostaglandin-induced muscle contractions. I can work with this!”
no problem is too small. he listens to every complaint
★ “i will revolutionise menstruation, darling!” you're so proud of him. Ford is proud of himself too
★ normally, he treats you like his equal, his partner, his greatest love. but when you’re sick ohh he secretly loves having an excuse to baby you. he brings you tea and tests the temperature on his wrist before handing it over. he fluffs your pillows, tucks you in way too snug. if you groan in pain, he’s immediately alert. “what is it? what do you need? tell me, dearest, I’ll get it.”
i can't believe i wrote an entire fic from Ford's pov journaling reader's cycle, im going insane
#gravity falls#gravity falls x reader#gravity falls x you#x reader#gravity falls smut#ford pines x reader#stanford pines#stan pines x reader#stan pines smut#ford pines smut#stanley pines x you#grunkle stan#ford x reader#stanford pines x you#stan pines x you#stanley pines x reader#stanley pines#ford pines x you#ford pines headcanons#gravity falls headcanons
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michelle's buddie fic recs: week 5!
i won't lie folks, these rec lists are the only reason i know what week it is. but hey, every week brings us closer to the return of 911! in the meantime, enjoy these fics <3
this is a mix of fics with all ratings, so some include NSFW content. please take a look at both the ratings and the fic tags before reading! some might also contain spoilers for season 8.
if you come across something you like in this list, remember to show some love to the author by leaving kudos and a comment!
am i who you think about in bed? | rarakiplin/@hoediaz | 6.8k | M
eddie sleeps with men that aren't buck until, well, you know. eddie's hoe phase is something so very dear to me <3 i love how this fic captures him (and that phase lol) so much!! and That Moment in the bar... unmatched
and if someone asked me if i love you (i'd lie) | forgetmyname/@kingmieczyslaw | 10.3k | E
Eddie has a concussion. Suddenly he can't lie. It would be fine if he wasn't trying his best to not confess his undying love for Buck. this is such a fun fic <3 i love the firefam's reactions to eddie's predicament!!
and longingly i long | effervescentwolf/@effervescentwolf | 14k | M
Asking for what you want is asking too much of Buck, except it isn’t really. Not when it’s Eddie. i read this fic, immediately clicked the little back to the top button, and still have it open in a tab to reread asap, that's how good this is. the hurt/comfort hits so so hard, truly marvellous!!
bobby versus buddie | songbvrd/@songbvrd | 10.4k | M
Five times Bobby tried to gently hold Buddie's hands and tell them they were in love, and one time they got the picture. i adore how this fic captures bobby and athena and bobby's relationship with buck and eddie and also buddie <3 just a delight to read!!
buck, bothered and bewitched | bellabrady | 5.8k | not rated
Buck gets turned into a Golden Retriever. SUCH a fun fic. i really do think that animal transformation-esque fics are an untapped market... this is a brilliant example of just how good they can be!!
give me a call if you ever get lonely. | dylaesthetics | 7.7k | E
Now that Eddie’s come out as gay, Buck helps him explore his kinks and fetishes. Not in the way you think. And later, exactly in the way you think. truly what a brilliant fic concept... hot and fun and cute <3
i just wanna tell you how i'm feeling | calvingseason | 7.7k | T
healing through shitty memes sure is cathartic. i do love a good crack treated seriously fic <3 eddie in this one genuinely had me laughing out loud!
if you say it with your hands | hammersmiths/@henwilsons | 9.9k | T
Eddie starts casually falling asleep against Buck, and Buck is very normal about it. oh the joy of the literal sleeping together tag!! this is soft and cute and just perfect <3 one of my favourites to reread!
leave the light on (i'll be coming home) | HMSLusitania/@hmslusitania | 44.4k | M
An accident on a call leaves Buck with custody of Chris after Eddie is... missing presumed. While they navigate their new family circumstances -- and fight to stay together, despite Eddie's parents' best efforts -- a John Doe wakes up in a coma ward with no memory of his own life beyond the knowledge he has a son named Christopher and, somehow, he needs to get home. i've been waiting to be in the right mood to read this one - since joining the fandom last year, it's probably the most recced fic i've seen! and, well, having read it, i totally get that. a wonderfully written fic, i loved the OCs but also adored buck and christopher here <3
let me know you (bedhead and morning breath) | burnthatbridge/@burnthatbridge | 6.2k | E
Buck hasn't gotten off since the lightning strike. Eddie watches him do something about it. THIS FIC. holy shit this fic. so good, so hot, so fun, so them!!
love me most | EiraLloyd/@unlifeira | 11.3k | T
Eddie’s not impressed that Buck and Tommy’s first date was supposed to be dinner and a movie. He thinks he can come up with something more creative, and he takes Buck on a date to prove his point. It’s a fake date, obviously. It’s not like he’s in love with Buck or anything.) i'm obsessed with eddie's behaviour in this fic <3 such a wonderful buddie dynamic!!
no takebacks | ever_yours/@ever-yours118 | 4.5k | M
In which Buck accidentally sends a confession to Eddie, lingers in the bargaining stage of grief, and maybe doesn’t end up regretting it so much, after all. love love love buck here, so true to character!! such a fun fic <3
PTA "coup d'état" | Bookworm0303/@insertlovelyperson | 26.5k | T
Buck attends some PTA meetings for Eddie. It goes about as well as you'd expect. this fic has so many funny moments, i can't even count how many times i had to put my phone down just to laugh. i especially loved ravi!! oh, the pta shenanigans... delightful fic!!
#buddie#buddie fic#buddie fic rec#911 abc#911 fic#911 fic rec#michelle’s recs#fic rec list#in exciting fic rec news#i made it onto not one but two rec lists this week!#which is new and delightful yay
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First Time
Han Jisung x fem!reader
Word Count:
18+ MDNI!!
Warnings: pet names, virgin!han & virgin!reader, jealousy, oral (f), unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it 😤), pull out method, nipple play, let me know if I missed anything <3
Not proofread, if you see a mistake, no you didn’t.
You and Jisung have been friend since birth. Your mothers just so happened to be best friends who got pregnant at the same time, so it was hard to avoid each other. It’s a good thing you got along, if not, it would’ve been very awkward.
Now, you two are in high school and the last year of it in fact. This year was one of the more important ones but you also felt the need to relax a bit this year. This includes finally getting a boyfriend and maybe having sex for the first time? Who knows?
Right now, you are sitting on your bed, wrapped up in your favorite fluffy blanket, which just so happens to be the one Jisung gifted you for your 13th birthday. As you relaxed on your bed, curled up and watching a movie, you hear a soft knock on your window.
With an excited squeal you hop off of your bed and scurry over to the window. You open it up and smile brightly.
“Jisung! Did you bring the snacks!?”
He climbed into your room and sighed, “Am I a personal snack collector to you?” he deadpanned.
“Hmm…. Yes.” You tease before padding back to your comfy bed.
With another sigh he follows you to your bed and sits beside you. “You’re lucky I am such a generous friend.” He said while grabbing a bag of snacks out of his backpack.
“Hey so, you know how losing your virginity is a big thing now?” You ask suddenly, looking at him innocently as his movements come to a halt. “Uh.. Yeah? What at about it?” He responded while looking over at you.
“I was just thinking of trying to lose mine this year. But I don’t know yet.” You dismissed the thought quickly and shifted on the bed. Noticing that Jisung was just sitting on the bed without any blankets, you draped yours over the both of you, scooting over closer to share some warmth.
You didn’t notice the way that he had stiffened when you got closer. In fact you haven’t been noticing those little details recently. You used to be acutely aware of every move anyone made around you. But with Jisung it was different. You didn’t need to be so hyper focused on the little things he did. He’s your best friend after all, he’d never try to hurt you so you don’t have to be careful around him.
-❤︎-
You are currently at a party that Hyunjin was hosting. You and the rest of the boys helped him set up and you wouldn’t help but notice how much Minho was looking at you. But little did you know, you weren’t the only one noticing this.
As the party continued, so did Minhos staring. Eventually he walked over to you and offered you some beer, to which you declined. He wrapped an arm around your shoulders while talking to you. You had to admit, you enjoyed him hitting on you. No one had really seemed to show an interest in you.
And, oh, how you were wrong about that one.
Sitting on the couch was a fuming Jisung. He was watching the whole time, seeing Minho basically eye fuck you from across the room, watching as he fucking dared to put his hands on you. He gripped the cup of soda so tight it almost snapped and spilled all over him. After noticing how angry he probably looks, he let out a soft sigh.
For the first time that night he let his attention gravitate towards something, anything else. And what a bad idea that was. He looked back at you two to see that he was leading you to a separate room. “Fuck,” he muttered through clenched teeth.
He knew what was going to happen, you were going to let him fuck you. And Jisung wasn’t going to let that happen. There’s no way in hell that Minho will be your first time. There’s absolutely no way that will be happening. And with his hyung being more experienced in that field, he was sure that he wouldn’t get a chance if you guys did do the deed.
Everything was a blur to you, from getting pulls into the room with Minho, to Jisung barging in and yelling to “not do anything you’ll regret”.
You stared at Jisung as he glared at Minho in anger and slight.. betrayal? “What are you fucking doing, Minho?” He growled at his hyung, while you stood there confused. “Hmm? What do you mean?” Minho asked, feigning innocence.
“You know exactly what I fucking mean,” you could see the pure anger in Jisung’s eyes when he said that. “Get out of here, I need to talk to Y/N,” Jisung spat to the older male. With a scoff Minho left the room.
Jisung watched as Minho left the room, his anger mixing with hurt when he look over at you. “What were you going to do with him, Y/N?” he asked softly.
“Well I wasn’t totally sure, but I was hoping to lose my virginity tonight. But that’s not happening, thanks to you,” you retorted. Who did he think he was to barge into the room like that?
“Oh, it’s gonna happen, thanks to me,” you didn’t have much time to register his words before he was inches away from you and his lips were pressed against yours in a firm yet gentle kiss. You could feel how much he’s wanted to do this, not from the suddenness of the kiss, but from the tenderness, and way it had so much emotion in it.
When he pulled away to look at you, he seemed as if he was about to cry. “You don’t understand how much I love you, Y/N. Please, be my girl, my love, mine. I’m so immensely in love with you it hurts my heart to not be with you,” he said gently while cupping your cheeks.
“Ji, I never thought you would feel the same way I do… I want to be yours too, baby. I want to be yours and I want you to be mine… I was just to dead set that you wouldn’t want me in that way I was willing to settle for less,” your voice broke as you spoke to him. You dreamed of this moment hundreds of times but never did you imagine to turn out like this.
“Y/N, will you let me be your first time?” Jisung asked softly, still cupping your cheeks. You nodded, and that’s all it took to him to press his lips against yours once more. This time the kiss was more urgent, more intense, compared to the first. The first kiss was him testing the waters, this one was a full on dive.
Not even a second later his tongue was delving inside your mouth, tilting his head to the side, to gain more access. The kiss got sloppier this way, the wet sounds coming from your mouths reverberating around the room. As it continued you felt the heat between your legs grow, not only that but you could feel his arousal pressed against your thigh.
You break away to catch your breath and he immediately attaches his mouth to the skin of your neck. His hands reach up to cup your breasts as he leaves hot open mouthed kisses on you the soft skin of your neck, kneading at the skin of your breasts through your shirt and bra. You gasp at his boldness but you’re not at all opposed to it. How could you be when he’s making you feel something you’ve never felt before.
In a blink of an eye he had your shirt on the floor and your bra pulled down so your tits fell out of it, for his viewing pleasure. You were about to open your mouth to speak but all that came out was a moan as he attached his lips to your sensitive nipple.
“Ji-“ you moan out at his tongue that starts to circle around the bud as his hand came up to play with the neglected one. For someone who’s never had sex before he sure seemed experienced. His thumb flicked and played with your nipple as he sucked on the opposite one. Soon he switched and started to suck on the one he had been playing with.
When he finally pulls away he looks you straight in the eyes before lifting you up and throwing you down onto the bed inside of the room. Hyunjin and set this room up just in case anyone wanted to have fun, and you must say; it came in handy.
“God you’re so fucking gorgeous,” he practically growled while slipping off your skirt to reveal your pretty white lace panties with a little pink bow on the top. He traced your slit through your panties, a huge wet spot already on the material. “So wet for me, baby,” he said before slipping off the panties and leaning in to lick a stripe up your slit. He moaned against your heat and began to eat you out, his hands coming up to hold the soft plush of your thighs.
You moan out and grip his hair, threading your fingers through the soft strands. “So good at that,” you whimper out as you feel an unfamiliar sensation build up in your lower abdomen. Soon enough you were both moaning out, him because of how fucking delicious you were, and you because of your first orgasm.
He pulled away and sat up straight, his eyes full of lust as he looked down at you, fully naked. Suddenly you felt hyper aware of every inch of your body but he was quick to make those thoughts go away. You watch as he leans into kiss you again, his tongue dancing with your own.
“Ji,” you say after pulling away, “Can I take your clothes off?” He nods and sits up straight and watches as you follow suit, your hands finding their place on the hem of his shirt and pulling it up and over his torso. You could come again just looking at his toned muscles.
After getting him fully naked your jaw dropped at the sight of him. Holy fuck was he just as hot as you’ve imagined. Your eyes fall down to his cock that looks painfully hard, precum beading at the tip of it. “Oh my fucking god,” you say before lying back down on the bed.
“You’re one hundred percent sure about this, baby?” he asks softly, his body leaning over yours and his tip already aligned with your sopping entrance. “Yes, I’m sure Sungie,” you plead and nod desperately. And with that he slips his cock in you. He moans at your gummy walls sucking him in along with you moaning at the foreign feeling.
He waits for you to adjust before rolling his hips back and forth. On instinct, your arms wrap around his neck, tears pricking at your eyes from the, once painful and now overwhelming pleasureful, stretch.
Once you both got used to the slow path he had set, he picked it up. His hips started to slam into yours at an ungodly rate, the wet noises and downright pornographic moans coming from the two of you were enough to trick someone into thinking it was a porn set.
Not very long after you felt that knot form in your lower abdomen again. “Sungie, I’m gonna come,” you moan out him. “Mhm, me too, babygirl,” he says breathlessly. Once he had said that you let go and came around his cock. He thrusted into you a few more times before pulling out and coming on your stomach.
“Fuck,” he mumbled as she flopped down next to you, his arms pulling you close. “I hope you know that this means we’re dating now,” he whispers tiredly into your ear. “Good, I wouldn’t want it any other way, my sweet boy,” you reply before pressing a sweet kiss to his lips and laying your head on his chest, falling asleep due to the very eventful night.
Tagged: @jeonginsleftcheek
#han jisung#stray kids#lee know#bang chan#seungmin#jeongin#changbin#kim seungmim#hyunjin#lee felix#skz felix#felix#han#hwang hyunjin#han x reader#han x y/n#jisung x reader#jisung smut#jisung imagines#jisung stray kids#chan#lee minho#stray kids minho#skz minho#minho#i.n skz#i.n stray kids#i.n#skz
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tastes like she might be the one
pairing: Astarion x f!Dark Urge · word count: 5.3k
rating: E for shameless smut (MDNI)
tags: blood drinking, period sex, oral sex, face-sitting, vaginal fingering, masturbation, Astarion being a little feral, porn with (some) plot, idiots in love, post-canon, general Durge spoilers
“Well, all of that’s to say that if you would like to… indulge, this might be your one and only chance to do so.” “Oh. I see.” Astarion’s eyes light up at the idea and Eve’s breath hitches when he takes a couple steps closer, his face just inches away when he says: “Then I suppose we better make it count.”
a/n: I did it, I succumbed to the Urge and wrote a period kink oneshot. hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it!
tagging some of my lovely moots who were hyping me up as I shared snippets from this fic: @khywren @nerdallwritey @xxnashiraxx @obsessedwhyyes @verbenaa @bby-bel-art @hellethil @arzen9 (thank you so much for getting excited about this with me. tbh it would have still been sitting in my wip doc if it weren’t for you all ❤️)
the title is from "LUNCH" by Billie Eilish
read on ao3 · dividers
As Eve is leaving the market, she feels her lower abdomen clench painfully in a manner she doesn’t recognize. She winces, tightening her grip on the grocery bags and tries to figure out what mundane malady it could be this time as she hurries back to the apartment.
Soon, she reaches the familiar facade, but as she goes for the handle, the door swings open. Eve startles when she sees Astarion, wide-eyed and visibly tense.
“What are you doing?” she yelps when he pulls her inside, standing just inches away from the pool of sunlight spilling onto the hardwood floors. “Get away from the door!”
She kicks it shut behind her, the room safely dim again. But Astarion seems to pay no mind to the obvious danger, as he grabs the bags from her and puts them on the ground, before turning her around and assessing her body as if looking for something.
“What happened? Where is it? Show me.”
“Where is what? Are you okay?”
“The wound!” he shrieks, voice high-pitched from nerves. “Hells, I can smell your blood, I could smell it from blocks away. Did someone attack you? Who do I have to kill?”
Eve freezes as the pieces connect in her mind. The pain. The scent of blood that was imperceptible to her but obvious as alarm bells to Astarion’s senses.
Eve laughs at the absurdity of it, Astarion’s eyes widening even further as he tries to fathom what in the Hells she’s on about. Bhaal hand-sculpted her for one purpose and one purpose only, designed her to carry out his gory vision most efficiently, and yet he still made her bleed like this…?
“Oh, that petty son of a bitch!” Eve says to no one in particular. After a deep breath, she reaches for Astarion’s hands and explains in a calmer tone: “I’m not hurt, Star. I think I just got my period. It’s as novel to me as it is to you, honestly.”
She watches as Astarion’s expression cycles through a series of emotions, so clear and unfiltered. First confusion, then relief, and finally a peculiar mix of glee and dread.
“Oh. Oh. ALRIGHT.” He takes a step back, frantically looking up and down her body. When his mouth opens again, words spill out in a chaotic monologue punctuated by nervous giggles. “Fear not, I am so prepared for this. Well, truth be told, my only knowledge about half-elves and menstruation comes from Shadowheart and I don’t know how reliable that is, she tends to be a tad dramatic, don’t you think? But let’s think hmmm… A bath! Would you like me to draw you a bath? Wait, no, you must be hungry, let’s make you some food first.”
He reaches for the grocery bags and darts upstairs.
“Are you sure you’re feeling okay?” Eve asks warily as she follows him up to the kitchenette.
“Oh yes darling, I am doing quite SPLENDID myself, I am just concerned about your comfort!!”
Rather unceremoniously, Astarion turns the grocery bags upside down, produce tumbling in all directions across the counter. He grabs a small knife and begins to peel some potatoes whilst aggressively humming Down by the River.
As Eve watches his frantic movements, her stomach drops in realization.
“Star…” she starts, walking up to him.
“YES, my dearest?”
“Is the blood… distracting?”
Astarion’s nervous, high-pitched giggle is enough of a confirmation.
“OH YES! Incredibly so! But do not worry about me, the concern right now should be YOUR COMFORT.”
“Oh gods,” Eve sighs, massaging her temples. “Is this what the next tenday is going to look like?”
“TENDAY?” Astarion stabs the counter, the tip of the knife wedged into the wooden surface. There is sheer panic in his eyes when he turns around and asks: “You bleed for a tenday?”
“I don’t know, this is a first! But as far as I know, people can bleed for anywhere from three to ten days?”
“THAT’S FINE. We will get through this together!” He yanks the knife out and resumes his task.
Eve stands there for a moment, watching him, unsure of what to do with herself.
“Are you hungry, is that the problem? Would feeding on me help?”
For a moment, Astarion freezes. He turns around, knife in hand, his gaze slipping down Eve’s body for a split second.
“What exactly are you offering?” he asks when he meets her eyes again, and Eve can feel her cheeks grow hotter in an instant.
“GODS, ASTARION.”
“I’M JUST SAYING–”
“YES, I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE SAYING–”
“IT COULD HELP WITH YOUR CRAMPS–”
“OKAY, I’M GOING TO TAKE A BATH NOW, BYE.”
“SOUNDS GOOD, I’LL KEEP PEELING–”
“YOU’VE ALREADY PEELED A DOZEN POTATOES, THAT’S TOO MANY POTATOES FOR ONE PERSON.”
“I’M STILL LEARNING, GIVE ME A BREAK.”
“OKAY I’M LEAVING NOW, I LOVE YOU.”
“I LOVE YOU TOO.”
Eve storms off to the bathroom. As she starts pouring water into the tub, she tries to push away the mental image of Astarion’s head between her thighs.
She adds some lavender oil into the water and gets inside, the hot temperature helping soothe her cramps. She leans her head against the edge of the tub, trying to make sense of all this.
Perhaps the reason she doesn’t remember this happening before is because her body put this particular function on hold while she was fighting for her life every day, sleeping on the ground, and eating irregularly. But now in the six months since the Netherbrain fell, she has been able to finally feel safe, giving her organism a chance to settle back into its natural rhythm.
It still doesn’t explain why Bhaal didn’t just skip this part in the design process, but Eve does not even want to begin to understand his sick and twisted ways, so she pushes those thoughts away and tries to relax.
After fifteen minutes or so, there is a light knock on the door.
“Yes?”
The door creaks and Eve opens her eyes to see Astarion with a mug in his hand, looking a tad embarrassed.
“Hello,” he says as he continues to stand awkwardly in the doorway.
“You can come in, I won’t bite.”
He walks up and places the steaming mug on a stool by the tub. Eve can smell the mix of chamomile, ginger, and something else she doesn’t recognize. Astarion kneels beside her, arms propped on the edge of the tub.
“I brewed you some herbs that should help ease the pain. And there’s stew cooking, it will be done in an hour or so.”
“Thank you.” She reaches for his hand and places a kiss on his knuckles, eliciting a soft smile.
“I’m sorry about earlier. It was a lot to process all at once. I thought you might be bleeding out on the street somewhere and I couldn’t do anything about it, I was just stuck inside waiting for you to come back. And then you waltz in here as if nothing happened and once I knew you were safe, the smell of your blood was–” He trails off with an absentminded smile. “Well, let’s just say I’ve gotten somewhat accustomed to it now, but it is still quite distracting.”
“I’m sorry you were so worried, that must have been terrifying.”
“It was. But I also should have known that if anyone was foolish enough to attack you, you could handle it just fine. Anyways, you should drink your tea,” he says, passing her the mug. She takes a sip, the herbal mix blossoming on her tongue, and hands it back to him. “Are you enjoying the bath?”
“Yes, the hot water is helping a lot. But, I’m afraid there is something wrong with our tub.”
“Which is?” he asks, raising his eyebrow.
“It’s missing an elf.”
“Ah, an easy fix,” he says with a smile.
Eve takes another sip of her tea as Astarion slips out of his clothes. She shuffles forward to make space for him, and he slowly lowers himself into the tub behind her, gasping as he touches the hot water. She leans back against his chest, nestling into his open arms.
After a moment of silence, Astarion asks:
“So, we don’t have to talk about him if you don’t want to… But, um… Doesn’t this seem like a design flaw?”
“No, we do have to talk about him, because what in the actual fuck was he thinking? As if my whole life wasn’t bloody enough. And I can’t even justify it in any pragmatic way, because it’s not like I needed to bear more Bhaalspawn. I was supposed to be the last one!”
“Daddy’s special girl.”
“Do not ever say that again.” She elbows him and Astarion laughs behind her.
After her bath and dinner, Eve decides to head downstairs and visit Derryth while the apothecary is still open. She explains the situation and asks for some menstrual cloths and anything that could help ease her cramps. The woman watches her intently as she listens, brows furrowed.
“Okay, so personally this is none of my business of course,” Derryth says, raising her hands defensively. “But as an apothecary, I feel obligated to ask: are you aware that you do not need to bleed every month? There are ways you can stop it.”
“There are?”
“Yes. Well, but first: are you and Astarion trying to conceive?”
Eve just stares blankly ahead as her life flashes before her eyes. It’s not something she ever thought to consider, she just assumed… Well, he is undead, after all.
“Umm… is that even… possible?” she asks weakly. “Given our… situation?”
“Under regular circumstances, no,” Derryth rushes to answer and Eve sighs with barely concealed relief, “but I’ve heard of some rituals… I don’t know, Eve, stranger things have happened. But no, unless you go out of your way to achieve it, you’re safe.”
“Okay. Then no, we are absolutely not trying to conceive. Gods, could you imagine–”
“I’d rather not,” Derryth says curtly. “Now, if that’s the case, then there is absolutely no need for you to suffer every moon. There are different ways you can go about it, the one that seems most popular with my clients is this tonic,” she says as she pulls out a couple of bottles from the drawer behind her and places them on the counter. “It’s fairly easy to use, it comes in these little bottles and you drink one the first night of each tenday. And there you go, problem solved.”
“That sounds… awfully easy,” Eve says as she eyes the medicine before her.
“Well, yes, because it is.”
“Does it have any side effects?”
“Of course it doesn’t. It’s supposed to make your life easier, not harder,” Derryth says with the patience of a parent explaining the most obvious concept to their child.
Eve gets a month’s supply to try out, along with some pain medicine to help carry her over before the tonic starts to work. When she gets back to the apartment, she shows Astarion the bottles and explains how it all works.
“That’s probably for the best,” he says. “I’m glad you won’t have to go through this pain again.”
“Yes, me too, but…” Eve hesitates for a moment, but the memory of Astarion’s frantic energy from this morning is enough to give her the confidence to suggest: “Well, all of that’s to say that if you would like to… indulge, this might be your one and only chance to do so.”
“Oh. I see.” Astarion’s eyes light up at the idea and Eve’s breath hitches when he takes a couple steps closer, his face just inches away when he says: “Then I suppose we better make it count.”
There is a moment of tense silence as they regard each other, Eve’s chest rising and falling heavily at his proximity.
But then the final thread of self-control snaps and Astarion pulls her closer, capturing her mouth in a greedy kiss, swallowing up the gasp that slips past Eve’s lips as she opens up to him. Suddenly, the air around her is all citrus and spice, Astarion’s scent and taste mixing into an intoxicating combination. It could easily sweep her off her feet were it not for his hands digging into her hips, anchoring her against him.
With a firm tug to her lower lip, Astarion breaks away, an undeniable urgency to his movements as his mouth slips down to her neck and he inhales sharply, head nuzzled against her. His voice is low and breathy when he says:
“Hells, you smell divine.”
With bated breath, she awaits the sharp sting of his fangs, wanting nothing more than to give him everything he craves. But instead, Astarion’s hands slip down to the back of her thighs and Eve’s body instinctively follows, like it’s a routine they’ve been rehearsing. She jumps, legs wrapping around his waist as if that’s precisely where they belonged.
Eve sinks her fingers into his soft curls, kissing him with a newfound ferocity. She barely registers the steps Astarion takes until with a loud clatter, he kicks a chair out of his way, and she realizes they’re at the dining table. He lets go of her with one hand to push his notes to the side, pieces of parchment flying to the floor as he seats her on the edge.
Astarion breaks the kiss, pinning her in place under his watchful gaze, the room silent save for the heavy pounding of Eve’s heart.
“Indulge, you say? Don’t mind if I do.”
Astarion sinks down to his knees before her, and the sight of it alone is enough to make Eve’s head spin with need, the overwhelming desire to feel his mouth against her skin, to hear the savory sounds that escape his throat every time he tastes her.
He tugs at her waistband and Eve lifts herself off the table just enough to let him pull her pants down and toss them to the side. Astarion swallows hard when she parts her legs for him and it looks like it’s taking him every ounce of self-determination to not rip off the final barrier between them and devour her right there and then.
His hands reach up to push her back, and she leans away, propped on her elbows, not daring to miss out on a single moment of this hypnotizing spectacle. A low, guttural sound rumbles out of his chest as he presses his lips to her plush thigh and starts kissing up, closer, and closer, and–
Eve winces at a sharp stab of pain that begins to radiate down her thighs and up her spine in a throbbing, dull shiver, the hard wooden surface beneath her doing nothing to soothe her discomfort.
Astarion pauses, leaning away to meet her eyes.
“Are you alright, love?”
“I, um–” she sighs, bemoaning the need to be rational at a moment like this. “I am loving this energy, I really am. But there is no way we’re doing this on a table, my back is killing me.”
“I suppose we can make do with a bed, then.”
He wastes no time as he rises to his feet and scoops her up, and in that moment Eve is convinced that she could get used to being carried like this. Astarion rushes to the bedroom to find Scratch splayed out across the mattress, raising his head curiously as they enter.
“Out,” he orders with poorly concealed desperation.
The dog whines, but darts out of the room obediently, and Astarion kicks the door shut behind him. He lowers her onto the edge of the bed and retrieves some pillows to place under her back.
“Are you comfortable?”
“Yes, I feel quite spoiled, actually. Are you comfortable?” she asks, unconvinced, watching as he once again gets to his knees on the hardwood floor.
“Oh, trust me, I am exactly where I want to be,” he says in a tone that erases any lingering trace of doubt from her mind.
Eve falls silent as Astarion’s hands begin to snake up her thighs, lithe fingers reaching the hem of her underwear, eyes meeting hers for a final confirmation that feels superfluous given their current predicament, and yet he still seeks it. Eve nods slowly, her throat too tight with anticipation to utter a sound, and she watches as Astarion hooks his fingers in and begins to slide the garment off her body with nigh religious reverence.
Once it slips down to her knees, she can finally get a better view and gods damn it, she changed into clean clothes less than an hour ago and already the fabric is ruined, a dark, rust-colored stain blooming along the gusset.
Eve shuffles her legs, helping Astarion slide the underwear completely off her. She expects him to toss it on the floor, but instead she watches, transfixed, as he folds it meticulously before slipping it into his pant pocket.
“Excuse you–”
But her objection dies in her throat at the sight of Astarion parting her thighs with unmatched focus. For a moment he just kneels there completely still, pupils blown wide, watching her like a predator poised to strike. It would be unnerving if it wasn’t him.
He hooks his arms under her thighs and pulls her closer, resting her legs on his shoulders.
Under his scrutinous gaze she becomes utterly aware of the wetness between her thighs, blood and arousal mixing into one. Suddenly, her mind drifts away from her kneeling lover to the softness of the silk bed sheets beneath her, the sheets that they got as a housewarming gift from Shadowheart, the ones that Astarion was so excited about, and however weakly, she whispers:
“Wait– We’re going to ruin the sheets–”
Her words seem to snap Astarion out of his trance and he looks up from the sanguine scene before him to meet her gaze.
“I can live with that.”
And as if to prove his point, he lunges forward, their moans mixing in unison the moment his tongue drags a firm line along her center. His grip on her tightens, surely enough to bruise, but Eve is way past the point of caring. Damn the bruises, damn the sheets, all that matters right now is the inferno raging within her, the ungodly sounds erupting from the depth of Astarion’s chest as he feasts on her like a man starved.
Eve’s elbows give in beneath her and she falls back on the pillows, losing sight of his efforts. Instead she reaches for him, nails scraping against his scalp, legs crossed behind his head and urging him closer. Astarion’s nose presses deliciously against her clit as his tongue enters her time and time again, his groans vibrating through her core.
One of his hands wanders to the hem of her shirt, lifting it up past the soft curve of her stomach. He leans away ever so lightly, lips brushing against her as he pleads:
“I need to see all of you.”
Eve complies, the tempo of Astarion’s tongue hastening the moment the linen slips past her the stiff peaks of her nipples. As she tosses her blouse to the side, she is struck by how completely bare she is before him, all the while Astarion looks as if he might have just come home from work, every button accounted for, every thread in place. A perfect picture of composure, were it not for the state of his curls, dampened with sweat and flattened against the grip of her thighs, nor the blood smeared against every inch of his exposed skin.
His tongue leaves her, but before she can protest this newfound emptiness, his mouth shifts up, lips closing around her clit with a firm suck as a single finger teases her entrance. Astarion slips inside with no resistance, one knuckle deep, tormenting her with how it’s simultaneously overwhelming and not nearly enough.
“Please, Star–”
But before the words fully leave her lips, they blossom into a wanton moan as he sheathes his finger, and beckons her, brushing against the spot that makes her feel weightless, like she is not of this world.
She bucks her hips into him and he moans against her cunt, encouraged by her reaction, and soon enough a second finger follows. He slides in slowly, the stretch combined with the suction of his lips pushing any previous aches and discomfort from her mind, leaving naught but an all-encompassing surrender, delicious pressure rising within her.
Through the haze, she reaches down, fingers teasing the points of his ears, and she knows exactly what she is doing, knows the effect it has on him, how it coaxes the sweetest sounds from his lips she is sure she will never get enough of.
She recalls the first time she did it, over a year ago, back when neither of them knew how to define the curious companionship that has grown between them. It elicited the most unrestrained noise she ever heard from him and Astarion must have been taken aback by it, too, because he tore her hands away from him, pinning them above her head. He told her then that she was playing with fire but she couldn’t help it, couldn’t tear her eyes away from the blaze.
It consumes them both now, eliciting the most obscene sounds from her love, his fingers picking up speed as they dart in and out of her, brushing deep inside with every stroke.
She knows she won’t last long, cannot last long, not with the way he has become fluent in the language of her body, knowing exactly which strings to pull to make her sing.
And sing she does, mouth falling open with praises that get increasingly terser, until the only word she can remember is his name.
She cries it out as she grasps the sheets, the moment the pleasure becomes uncontainable, when it lights up every nerve, every inch of her skin. It’s a trust fall and he is right there to catch her, just as he always is. Just as he always will be.
Astarion’s grip doesn’t soften as she rides out this crest, his mouth and fingers relentless in drawing every last one of her moans, her eyes shut in pure bliss.
But then eventually all of her energy evaporates, her thighs growing slack around him, and Astarion retracts slowly, placing the softest kiss on her clit before getting to his feet.
Eve feels the mattress dip as he crawls towards her and she somehow wills her eyelids to open, only to witness Astarion’s bloodied fingers slip into his mouth, his eyes fluttering shut as he begins to suck. The display is enough to make her throat go dry, skin flaring up with want that never got the chance to subside.
Finally when he salvages every single drop, he lets go, eyes meeting hers as his fingers leave his mouth. Eve takes in the gory state of him: there is blood on his lips and chin of course, but also some on his nose, and is that…? Yes, somehow a bit of it found its way to his brow line. She can’t help but laugh as she tucks a flattened curl behind his ear.
“You look…”
“Happy?” Astarion offers, making a show of licking his lips in a manner that is surely against some moral law.
“I was going to say insatiable.”
“You would be correct,” he admits as he cups her cheek.
He kisses her deeply, his taste a heady mixture of them both, laced with the metallic tinge of her blood. And suddenly their bodies are flush against one another once more, hands wandering, the unmistakable evidence of his arousal pressed against her thigh. Eve’s hand slithers down between them, Astarion’s jaw going slack the moment she palms his still-clothed cock.
Her breath hitches at the feel of him in her hand, but Astarion seems to have a plan of his own because he manages to compose himself, leaning away to ask:
“Can you take more?”
“Try me,” she dares, the attempted edge of her words dulled by how breathless she is.
A wide grin blooms on Astarion’s face, the tips of his fangs glinting in the moonlight when he asks:
“How is your back?”
It takes her a second to register the meaning of his question. Truth be told, she completely forgot about it, the pain pushed out into the far corners of her mind by the overwhelming pleasure.
“It’s better.”
“Excellent. Do you think you can sit up?”
“Yes?” she says, unsure of where he is going with this.
Astarion leans away enough to pull his shirt over his head, and then rests on his back, tapping his shoulders as he says:
“Then sit.”
“What?” she asks, swallowing hard.
“You heard me.”
Slowly, Eve gets to her knees, trying to ignore the way the wetness pooled between her thighs seems to shift with the movement. But the shameless anticipation painted on Astarion’s face is enough to weed out any sprouting insecurities, and so she moves up, caging his head between her thighs and gripping the carved headboard for support.
There is a moment of stillness when she hovers over him, and then Astarion’s gaze travels from her face down to her core and he licks his lips at the sight because of course he does.
Eve rolls her eyes and says:
“You’re ridicul–”
But before she can finish the thought, Astarion grabs her waist and pulls her down, forcing an ungodly gasp out of her and suddenly all she can think about is how overwhelming the feeling of his mouth is in that position. Astarion gives her a slight, encouraging shove, and Eve starts rocking against him, chasing the friction that feeds the tempest brewing within her.
Astarion seems to be completely lost in the feeling, clawing at her thighs and moaning against her cunt in a way that vibrates deliciously up her spine. Eve wants to hear more of those sweet sounds, so she looks back, witnessing the erection straining against his pants and she reaches out to stroke him through the fabric. He groans, the movements of his tongue growing sloppier by the second, as she’s trying to unlace his pants with one hand without losing her balance.
“Need a little– Ah– Help,” she gasps when the task quickly proves beyond her current capabilities.
Astarion lets go of her thighs, nimble fingers moving to unfasten the garment in no time. He pulls his pants and underwear down just enough to free his untouched cock and Eve’s mouth waters as she catches a glimpse of how hard and flushed it is.
She leans back, propping herself with one hand as the other reaches out to spread the bead of precum over the head. As much as she can muster from that position, she starts to stroke him, encouraged by the truly obscene sounds that start erupting from his throat.
But then she feels her side cramp up, her arm giving in beneath her. Astarion’s hands dart to grasp at her waist to keep her from collapsing.
“Bad idea,” she admits as she regains her balance, clutching at the headboard.
Astarion hums a noncommittal ‘mhm’ against her center as he settles back into a rhythm. His tongue is relentless in forcing ragged gasps out of her, but Eve wants to give him more, so in a flash of lust-laced genius, she offers:
“Bite me.”
Astarion’s eyes widen, his pupils dilated to the point where she can barely see the scarlet encircling them. He turns his head to the side and Eve would mourn the loss of his touch, were it not immediately compensated by the deep guttural moan that escapes his mouth the moment his teeth sink into her thigh.
Somehow, in all this time together, they have never done this. The initial sting is much sharper than usual, but as Astarion starts to drink, blood leaving Eve’s body in greedy pulls, she feels the familiar throbbing sensation begin to radiate from the wound, her cunt pulsating with every sip he takes and oh gods–
She watches mesmerized as Astarion reaches down and starts to pump himself and the image alone is enough to push her towards the edge. Her fingers slip down to her center to gather some of her slick before gliding up, tracing circles around her clit, her movements matching the rhythmic groans that Astarion makes with every mouthful of her blood.
Eve knows that he’s close, recognizes it in the timbre of his voice, the furrowed line between his brows, the tension in his muscles as his strokes pick up pace. She swallows hard, wishing for nothing more than to watch him unravel beneath him, to witness–
It sneaks up on her this time, the electrifying shudder that tears through her body. Her mouth falls agape, knuckles white as they grip desperately at the headboard as if it’s the only thing keeping her tethered to reality. Through the bliss, she barely registers the final guttural moan coming from somewhere below, the thick, hot rivulets painting her back.
Astarion’s mouth reluctantly leaves her thigh, his tongue cleaning up any remains of blood off her skin. Eve can feel his hands come up to her waist to steady her, but for now all she can do is just sit there, breathing heavily, head spinning with blood loss and afterglow.
After a couple moments she wills her muscles to move, her legs shaky as she shuffles down Astarion’s body before collapsing on top of him. His arms drape softly around her and they lie there in silence, utterly spent.
Eventually, Astarion slips out from underneath her, and Eve would reach out to stop him if she had any energy left. Instead, she burrows her face into the pillow and listens to the soft clicks of Astarion’s heels against the floor (how did he keep his shoes on all this time?) as he rustles through some drawers.
When he returns, she feels his palm nestle in between her shoulder blades, his voice soft and steady when he utters the incantation:
“Te absolvo.”
Healing magic begins to radiate across her body, lifting the heaviness from her muscles and dissipating the fog clouding her mind. And then there is another sensation as what she assumes to be a warm wet cloth runs gently along her back before slipping between her thighs, erasing the evidence of whatever the Hells it was they just experienced.
Suddenly, Eve feels a pang of disappointment and she voices it by mumbling incomprehensibly into the pillow.
“I don’t speak Ghukliak, love,” Astarion says.
Eve groans before turning her face to the side. She meets his amused gaze, spotting the Amulet of Silvanus that adorns his bare chest.
“I said: ‘are you done already?’ You don’t want more blood?”
Astarion laughs heartily as he grabs another cloth to clean his stomach and chest.
“Oh, and I’m the insatiable one? I always want more blood, dear, but you look like you could use a break, you know.”
“Excuse you, I feel excellent.”
And as if to prove it, she props herself up and sits on the edge of the mattress. She takes a sip from the water cup he left for her on the bedside table before getting to her feet.
Astarion watches her intensely as she approaches. Usually, he’s much more relaxed after he feeds, but Eve can see that there is still some tension in his features, his nostrils flaring ever so slightly as she steps into his space.
She knows he’s holding himself back.
And that just won’t do.
Her arms drape around his neck, and she leans in, lips brushing against his ear as she whispers:
“Take as much as you want, Star. It’s a rare treat, after all.”
Eve delights in the strained gasp that leaves his lips, in the caress of his hands that trail down to her waist before pulling her flush against him.
“How awfully selfless of you,” he drawls, leaning in to kiss her.
a/n: aaaaaand with that, I have officially passed 100k words on ao3. what a glorious way to reach that milestone 😅 I would love to hear your thoughts on this one, especially since I rarely write smut so any feedback is super helpful ❤️
#can I offer you some vampire smut to stave off the sunday scaries?#astarion x durge#astarion x the dark urge#durgestarion#bg3 fanfiction#astarion fanfiction#astarion smut#my fic
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I imagine willels first bonding moment was them just crying together.
They're trying to get used to their life in cali, and everything feels off, El and Will aren't talking because they've never really been close.
Els still grieving, Wills still miserable, but he knows how hard it must've been for El, so he goes into her room one day randomly, they talk for awhile, but it's very scarce. Then Will just hugs El, and El just cries, she let's out all her bottled up emotions and just cries into Wills arms and Will hugs her back tightly and crying too
#“who hurt you?” oh COME ONE WHAT SHOW AM I WATCHING.#i just think theyd cry and hug eachother and feel happy bc when they felt their most alone they actuay had eachother#and then they ebcome the best of siblinngs#willel#willel siblings#will byers#eleven hopper#stranger things
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Call It What You Want
husband!pedro pascal x younger!reader
summary: you and pedro are married, but you've kept it a secret up to the point you sometimes forget there's supposed to be a golden band on your finger. but then you both get cast in your first movie together. the chemistry is off the charts, and it starts to catch upon you: will the lines between shipping and reality finally blur?
warnings: 18+ (minors dni), age gap (ñom), smut, dry humping, oral (m. receiving) while pedro wears the skirt™️ (welcome to another episode of the writer's barely disguised fetish), p. in v., teeny bit of angst because i malfunction if i don't bring sad vibes to the function, the worst ever attempt of comedy witnessed by human kind, they're so down bad it hurts, jealous!reader, possesive!pedro, reader speaks spanish and may or may not have direct/indirect latino blood somewhere, use of spanglish but no translations ☹️ (boo go do your homework, citizens. that's what u get for making my dieter bravo fic flop BYE), i transcripted two real interviews for this so keep those likes, reblogs and comments up in the air where i can see 'em 🪓🪓
word count: 11,706 words
side note: hello! this is me, sliding my cv to become president of the pedro pascal fics. i'm kidding, just on duty to fulfill another request 🫡 believe it or not, i envisioned something like this but for myself IJBOL we have to keep the delusional levels UP!! i hope this meets ur expectations, it was fun to write :)
"Please welcome, the internet's newest darling, Y/n L/n!"
You walk into the set, cameras flashing bright and the band playing on the back. You hug Jimmy Fallon, and when he notices your body trembling he tells you everything will be alright. So did your manager before you stepped inside, but you can't help the nerves. You've never been this big before, and now it's all coming down together without letting you breath.
You take your seat and so does Jimmy.
"Hello, Y/n. This is your first time here, right?"
"Am I being too obvious?" you snort. The crowd laughs with you.
"Don't worry. It happens, especially when you're so young"
"Oh, please" you blush. "I can promise you there are kid actors who could handle this better than I am right now"
"Kid stars?" he lets out one of his famous cackles. "No need to be humble. You are great! Let's just talk about the year you've had: big breakout roles, ascend to fame, you're rocking it!" the crowd cheers, and you again turn into a flustered mess.
"Yeah, I suppose. It's hard to dimension when you've started as an extra for popular shows, to now being, you know, the main face of projects. But I could get used to it" you smile, "it's been a dream. I still can't believe it sometimes, look- I'm shaking"
The camera pans closer to the hand you're showing to Jimmy.
"Oh my God, even big stars like you get nervous"
"Big star? I wish I could feel like a constellation. I'm feeling more like a red dwarf star, baby"
The whole place bubbles in laughter. You feel better, your manager even giving you a thumbs up from behind the cameras.
"So, Y/n" Jimmy says once the laughter dies. "You just got casted in the upcoming Gladiator II movie, directed by Ridley Scott. How does it feel to be on your first big movie, alongside names like Paul Mescal, Denzel Washington and Pedro Pascal?"
You try to steady your heartbeat. "First of all, I have to say, it's such an honor to work with Scott. I grew up watching his movies. Like, Thelma and Louis is definitely my go-to movie. So, like, getting paired with such a talented cast is as awesome as terrifying" you answer with a laugh.
"Talking about that, you see" he leans closer, like he'll tell a secret. "I've heard things about you and a certain future co-star of yours"
You shift your position on the couch, your ring(less) finger itching. You have to avoid breathing in relief when Jimmy pulls out a picture.
"Oh. My. God"
He stiffles a laugh. No way. Has the room's temperature suddenly gotten hotter? Why is your face burning?
"Will you tell us the story behind this?" he asks, the camera focusing on the picture in question. The audience laughs, and you pray to God this is a nightmare, because it's too much embarrasment for a human to bear.
"Okay" you clear your throat, coughing awkwardly. "For my 25th birthday, I uploaded a bunch of pictures on Instagram, including ones where I was a teenager" you begin to giggle, "So. Um, there was this one, you see, that's, me, in my childhood home's bedroom, and my fans were quick to notice the poster above my bed"
"You mean, this one?" and Jimmy points it out. You cover your face with your palms. "It's a... Narcos poster" the audience laughs as you get redder. "A Pedro Pascal's Narcos poster"
"I know" you groan. "Picture this: me 18, and while my friends had posters of their favorite bands and artists, I was so different because I had a whole ass poster of a crime drama show about the world's most famous drug dealer on my bedroom" you recall with a laugh. "It was hard to explain to my mom. I believe she thought I wanted to sign for the DEA or something. When I told her I was going to be an actress, she was so relieved! She said: Oh, well. You'll die, but of hunger! Not a bullet in your head, at least"
"Oh. I'm so sorry. You proved her wrong though!"
"I did! Don't worry, Jimmy. She's my biggest fan now" you look at a specific camera before saying, "Te amo mami!"
"I see you speak spanish. I sometimes forget" he comments. "You've got one thing in common with Pedro, it seems. Think that'll make working with him less awkward?"
"I just hope he forgives me or I'm capable of moving out of the country and changing names" you giggle. "Pedro, lo siento!"
"Well, that's Y/n L/n, everyone! Pedro Pascal's number one fan" you burst out laughing in shame. "More on her lastest movie after the break"
mandoshoney: tell me i'm not the only one who started shipping pedro pascal and y/n l/n PLEASE can't wait to get content of them interacting ㅤㅤann-gell: mandoshoney y/n's pedro pascal's controversially young gf era starts now! i wonder how the press tour for #gladiatorII will go 🤔 unhing3dprincess: i bet my grandma they are dating ㅤㅤstarlightt180: unhing3dprincess ptwt can never tweet like normal ppl…wdym you're betting your grandma?!!!?
You were never a fan of secrets.
But then Pedro waltzed into your life with his charming smile and iconic mustache, and before you knew it, you had married him off in some church in California one random sunday morning ("I love you so much, can't wait to marry you, cariño" "If you can't wait any longer, why not now?")
Flash forward, four years later, and you'd think such event would be plastered all over the internet. But there is a reason why only you, family, a selected number of friends and your agents knew: you kept it a secret.
To the world, he was Chile's most elegible bachelor and you were a young rising star. The public loved both of you for the same reasons: charming persona and acting skills. Yet inside the privacy of your home, he was Pedro and you were y/n, wife and husband; he was yours as you were his.
And of course, no marriage is perfect, and your first real challenge is rather funny: you both get casted in your first movie together.
It shouldn't be hard, but it is. Being inside the Gladiator II set during seven months, so far away yet so close at the same time, was torture. You were Rome's empress and he's Marcus Acacius, yet behind the scenes, the actual married couple were you both.
It was hard to pretend you didn't know what he looked like without clothes when he wore his bathing suit, or that you didn't know his favorite food when Paul asked, or acting like you weren't interested in dating when a local in Malta during your trip at the beach asked you out (he didn't know who you were. You were flattered when he called you pretty in such a hot European accent, but then Pedro appeared from seemingly "nowhere" and you remembered what your real favorite accent was. He immediately called you bonita after that)
It was so hard to keep hands to yourself when he walked by you, covered in fake blood. To not think about licking it all over and under his armour. So was to pretend the thought of dry humping him with his Roman skirt on wasn't tempting. Or that the urge to kiss him got harder and harder to fight each passing day, even getting to a point where you would envy Connie for being able to kiss your husband in the open more, a privilege you didn't have.
You were loosing your mental health here. But Pedro was no better.
It was so hard to see you, the Moroccan sun shining over your features like you were an angel. Otherworldly. That he'd see red when you'd finish filming a scene with Joseph, forcing himself to interrupt the small chat you'd engage in after. He too couldn't keep pretending he didn't want to tear off those silk dresses out of your body, and kiss you out in the open like Joseph did.
He almost failed once, cornering you in the hallway of the hotel you were staying. His hot breath lingered on your neck. I miss you, he had said. You felt his hard brush the inner of your thigh. We can't, you whispered in a dragged out voice.
It was hard.
So you gave him your used panties, and you swear you could hear him jacking off in the bathroom of his room, next to yours. He'd screamed your name, and your hand had found it's way to your dripping cunt, doing what he was supposed to do; touching you the way he did. And you came, drowned out moans against your pillow. But it wasn't like when he did it.
But God has heard your prayers.
For the first time in weeks, you're lucky. You find Pedro sitting alone in the cafeteria, his phone in hand. He's still wearing his armour and skirt, not bothering to change for the break. You aren't God's strongest soldier, but you're trying not to go down on him so badly right here and now.
"Hey" he raises his head when he hears your voice, smile adoringly. It only grows wider when he notices you alone. "Thought you'd never get rid of Paul. He's like, stitched to you"
"Same can be said about you and Joseph" you sit across him, and despite most of his tone being playful, there are still hints of jealousy behind. It arouses you deeply, and with this hot summer day above you, your skin isn't the only thing that's getting sticky.
"In case you haven't read the script, I'm his wife" you wink. "Sorry this is how you find out"
He laughs loudly, and God, how have you missed that laugh. Sure, it's been there when you've been out with the cast together, but it doesn't tingle your chest as when you're the cause of it; it feels like it's for you only, and that's what makes it special.
"I miss you so much" he whispers, his hand sliding across the table, finding yours. His thumb carresses your soft palm, and you melt under Pedro's tender touch.
"I do too" you sigh, but it's instantly replaced by what could only be described as a smug face. You lean closer, whispering on his ear, the warm meeting cold. He shivers. "Wanna know something?"
"I'm all ears"
"I just came back from walking. Guess what?No one is 'round here" you lean back against your chair, shit-eating grin on your face as all his body tenses up. "Made sure of it. The trailer zone is empty too"
Pedro gulps, his adam's apple bobbing as his eyes look at you.
"Y/n" calling your name as a warning.
"What? Can't a girl find ways to have her husband all for herself?" you snort. "Please say yes" you let go of his hand, but the free fingers now travel across his broad chest, taunting him. "C'mon, we both deserve a break"
He can't say deny you anything, can he? You know it, he knows it.
Before you register, his big hand engulfs yours as you run across the set. You giggle at his rushed steps, even more when you stand before his trailer and he's fumbling his slippery hands with the doorknob, sloppy movements erratic.
"But you told me to stop" you tease, and he doesn't even let you add more because he's pushing you inside, forcing you with rough calloused hands to a chair and then you to sit over his lap.
"Fuck, babygirl. I've spoiled you way too much" he groans against your lips. "Lo sabes, ¿verdad? Just can't say no to you"
Your eyes darken dangerously, the hunger on them mirroring his own.
"How could you ever say no to this?"
You press your chest against his broad one as your lip bites into his lower one, teasing. Pedro feels his underwear getting tighter when your tongue finds its way inside his mouth, even getting a glimpse of the taste of the strawberries you had earlier before.
He deepens the kiss, and when you pull away to catch your breath, he doesn't waste his lonely mouth and busies himself with the task of kissing your sun-kissed neck, licking and pressing his lips under your jaw. Pedro goes even lower, down until he's reached your collarbone, making you groan a bit under his wet sloppy needy mouth. He's enjoying how putty you are under his intense kissing, fingers in his curls, that have begun to damp under the ablaze of the small space and pleasure that fills the air.
"Kiss me again in my lips" you whine after a while of him teasing you with kisses that get only rougher. "Pretty please, papi"
You cup his face in your hands, and Pedro's back to kissing you in the mouth, tasting all of your insides as he hasn't had in what feels like a lifetime.
"Of course, baby. Missed this pretty mouth" he mumbles in between hot kisses, his now growing boner pressing into you.
"Baby" you giggle. The skirt he's got on may hide it, but your fingers refused to wait, pulling it up. His bulge presses against the shorts he's got under the skirt, and you can feel your pussy and mouth drool. "We have to do something about this big boy" your hands pull down the short, leaving just his underwear on. He's about to remove the skirt, but your demanding hands stops him. "This stays"
His brown concerned eyes make you laugh, but you don't give him time to think about it, rather grinding against his erection. Pedro's breath hitches when he feels your daring movements, bucking his hips against yours.
The friction is addicting, and he captures your lips once again to make you feel what he can't with words: how fucking good this feels.
You keep moving over his aching dick. Your husband throws his head back, groaning in pleasure at the way your hips move against him, knowingly. His hands find their way to your ass under the flowy almost translucent skirt you chose to change in, gripping the rosy skin tightly, hands almost covering all of it.
"You wore this for me, right, cariño? Knew I couldn't say no" he groans, firm hands on your cheeks, the grinding meeting his hips now harsher. "Less with you walking around with this slutty skirt of yours"
You make little sounds he's obssesed with, dripping out of your filthy mouth.
"Fuck" Pedro groans after a while, "I need to have you, mami. Missed you so much" eager fingers make it to your top. He growls, deep within him―guttural, ready to pull it off as he mumbles naughty wife when he realizes you got no bra on, chastising you for a "rushed" plan that seemed planned all along, when a sound cuts through the air.
You both stop.
The sound gets clearer.
It's a knock. A knock at his door.
A knock in Pedro's trailer.
And you are inside. Both.
While you're grinding him.
With his skirt on.
(It's time to build a bomb and kill yourselves off and whoever is stading behind that door)
"Pedro!" a familiar accent calls. Peudrou. It's Paul. "Hey, man. Just wondering if you are here"
He's debating on speaking up when he sees your red face and rising-falling chest before him.
"Answer" you whisper breathlessly. He tries not to groan when he fills you slip out of the spot in his middle while also trying not to think about murdering Paul as soon as he gets out.
Aside from the order, you're unexpectedly quiet, and Pedro quirks an eyebrow at you. He knows you better―you're his wife after all, and if there's something he's aware of, is your inability to loose.
"I'm here" tone clipped and annoyed. But no footsteps backtracking are heard: the Irish man is still there.
You bite your lip, watching the skirt with his legs spread, a sight too tempting. Also, he was still hard, as hard as the task to not go and keep doing your job.
Oh, fuck this shit.
Your devilish hand equals the grin in your face, fingers making their way toward his unattended bulge.
"What are you doing here?" Paul asks, but Pedro's attention has completely deviated, now focused on how they land right over his clothed dick, skirt pulled up by your other hand. "I thought you were at the cafeteria"
"Yeah?" but it comes out strained, yet the younger man doesn't notice or comment.
His hips raise when your fingers press his member, massaging it.
"Yeah" he uses a tone that equals a duh. "You texted me yourself"
Pedro rolls his eyes, wishing desperately he would go away, annoying him just as much as a fly hovering above fresh food. Talking about food, fuck, weren't you hungry? He tried to warn you, holding your wrist, but all resolve was lost the moment you looked in his eyes: he immediately pulled down his briefs, dick sprouting hard.
"Well, changed my mind" his tone falters in between words, member now free from the confines of his tight underwear.
"Are you tired, man? You sound tired" Paul comments on his tone. "Came to rest?"
You spit on your hand, and he gulps.
"Somethin' like that"
You start to jerk him off, leaving little wet kisses and licks just above his dick. Pedro's eyes are hypnotized, glued to every lick of yours across his girth, the spit making your movements smoother. Sexier. Fuck.
"Well, sorry to break it to you but rest time is over. They want us back on set now"
Your tight needy lips are wrapped around his his length and it's so hard to keep the talk normal when he justs wants to yell at Paul to fuck off. Your hand is there too; you are as of help as much as you aren't.
"I'll be there, Paul, just―Fuck!"
But his attempt to cover a moan doesn't go unnoticed.
"Are you alright in there?" he tries to enter, but Pedro locked the door. He's yelling he's fine, but Mescal doesn't sound convinced. "I can't go inside; it's locked. Are you sure you are okay, mate?"
"Didn't want you to take a picture of me drooling on my sleep" he manages to get out in a monotone voice. A real win if you take into account you've gotten to a point where you squeeze under his cock, massaging his balls.
"Smart move!" he chuckles from outside. "I guess I'll see you there"
Pedro covers a moan with his palm as he's throwing his head back in pleasure. He can feel his orgams looming over, minstrations growing sloppier around his pulsating cock, the need to fill your greedy evil mouth with his seed making him sick. He's a simple man: he just wants his pretty wife to fuck his cock silly and come in her mouth in peace. Is that so hard to get this days?
Paul seems to be finally gone as Pedro can't keep containing his grunts anymore, steps moving: until said steps sound closer again.
"Oh, I almost forgot, have you seen Y/n? I can't find her anywhere" it's coming. His orgasm is coming in the absolute worst moment. He can feel you gagging at his hard rock cock, hitting the back of your throat now. Still, your hands don't loose their grip on his cock and skirt, determination filling that sexy little body of yours. It was rather admirable the effort you were putting in this. "Think she went to the beach? She said she loved it. God, that little rebel. Anyway, if you see her, tell her-"
He leans his head back once again, seeing stars. No one knows him like his wife, truly.
The sight of you drooling from your chin, the wet sounds of him fucking himself onto your mouth as your spit-coated fingers pump his girth, you gulping down the precum from his tip, his fingers holding your face roughly by the cheeks...
"Yes, Paul, yes!" Pedro barks, barely hiding the moan that erupts from his ribcage, thick shots of his hot cum hitting your tongue and deep of the throath. "Fuck off and let me get ready"
"Jesus, mate, chill. I'm sorry. See you there"
And Paul Mescal's hovering fly ass is finally gone.
"Poor Paul" you say as soon as you pull off his length, voice raspy as you huff for air. Pedro lovingly cleans rests of your saliva and his cum from your chin as he chuckles at how much audacity, courage and horniness could fit in such a small young body. "You've ruined the friendship"
"You think?" he licks off some as you sit on his lap again, tongue directly on your face. You feel aroused again, but time's up. "It's your fault. That and this"
He points down.
"Just as you used that pretty head of yours to think of the trouble you just made, think of an excuse for Mr. Ridley about the skirt"
at0michips: wait wdym paul is sick??? ㅤㅤl-u-n-a-m: at0michips he's died vnightx: i'm wondering who'll do now the do you even know me interview with pedro now :( i was so excited!!! hope they don't cancel it :( ㅤㅤunhing3dprincess: vnightx i bet my grandma it's y/n ㅤㅤat0michips: unhing3dprincess why do u keep betting ur grandma omg 😭😭😭
"You know what I think would be fun?" Pedro comments while you wait for the interview's set to be prepared.
Tour press has finally begun. That meant you could go home for a while after the filming wrapped, just to be back for the promotion of the film. You were excited of course, the experience new and thrilling. After much needed battery recharging and husband/wife time, you were ready to take over the world.
But then Paul got sick.
Today's interview was scheduled to be him and Pedro, but since he was unavailable, they paired him with you, since you both spoke Spanish (which felt slightly racist in your opinion), and because Fred and Joseph were already paired up for the other.
You leave your coffee, knowing he's about to say something stupid or endearing, perhaps both, brown liquid probably spilling out of your mouth. Or worst, nostrils.
"Tell me"
"What if we left little hints that we're together?" his smile is one of mischief. "Like you could wear my cap, or I could wear a chain with your initial around my neck, like Ryan Gosling did at the Barbie premiere"
"Or as Taylor Swift sang" you counter. "But Pedro, dear, you're underestimating our fans. You don't think they'll match it sooner than we think?"
"Maybe" he agrees. That's just what I want. "What's funny is we're about to do a type of interview where we could blow our cover"
"Maybe" you repeat, "or maybe you don't know all about me as much as you think, Mr. Pascal"
He fake gasps, feigning hurt. "Is this a dare, Mrs. Pascal?"
"No" you try to be mature for once, cutting the banter as much as you'd like to go on and kiss him right there. "Also, remember to answer incorrectly sometimes, you know..."
"There's no way I'm letting you win though"
"Pedro, no seas necio!"
The producers arrive just in time to let you know it's ready.
"After M'lady" he's back to being charming as he is, not as husband charming but just Pedro Pascal charming. The nerve of this guy to do it in front of the LADbible crew.
"Whatever" you grumble, the nerves getting the best of you as you realize this interview may or may not give away more than you've been allowed before.
"Hello, I am Y/n L/n" you present yourself. Wow, the camera is really close. This isn't going to end well.
"And I'm Pedro Pascal"
Hearing his voice soothes you. It's okay, y/n, you got this. "And this is Do You Really Know Me- No wait, it's do you even know me. Okay, let's start again: Hello, I'm Y/n and this is-"
"I don't even know anymore" Pedro jokes, making you laugh. "Do you even know me?" he asks while looking forward, now making the crew laugh.
"This is Pedro Pascal, that'll do" you sigh.
"This is gonna be sad, she's not going to know any of these" he says, but in reality, he's mocking you, the mischief in his eyes glowing as he only looks at you tauntingly.
"Same can be said about you" you tease, "we're like a million years away"
"That's not true!" he gasps, "I watch your every move" punctuating each word. God, you try not to make a face. "I have Google alerts on you"
If he was gonna play, so were you.
"Glad to know I have you alerted" with the sweetest voice ever, seeing how his friendly façade falters for a bit at the tone you've used. You laugh, and Pedro takes the chance to laugh it off too.
After the introduction, they ask one of you to keep score, and you offer yourself because, well, you don't trust Pedro.
"I'll go first" you say. "Which was my first ever role in the industry? As an extra during an episode of Stranger Things, as a voice actor in A dog's purpose" you can't help but laugh, "or as a back-up dancer in Hustlers?"
"In Hustlers?" Pedro inquires in disbelief. "You're telling me you were in Hustlers?! I didn't even know you could dance!"
Lies. You and Pedro sometimes put some bachata and dance in the kitchen. God bless Juan Luis Guerra.
"Jennifer Lopez and I are practically besties" you answer nonchalant.
You know the answer. He does too. But he chooses the last one for comedic purposes.
"I'll go with Hustlers. Now that I'm looking at you, you do have a... dancer face"
"It's okay, you can say the forbidden word. I'll take it as a compliment" you laugh, "you're wrong, though. The answer is Stranger Things"
"No way!" and it sounds as if he genuinely didn't know. Good lying son of a bitch; Jim Carrey on Liar, Liar would've been proud.
"Yes. If you look in the background of season two, on this one episode where Nancy and Steve appear to have broken up during a halloween party, you can see me drinking from a cup on a corner"
"That's so crazy"
"Yeah, I was twenty already, yet playing a highschooler" you giggle. "Wow, time flies by. Anyway, we're both at zero. Your turn"
"What film did my dad not let me see at the cinema when I was, uh, ten years old?" Pedro reads from his card. "Rambo: first blood, The Breakfast Club, Day of The Dead"
"I'm going to base this in the year you were born. Okay, so 1975. Let's see" one of the things Pedro loves about you is that you're like a film encyclopedia, but right now, that'll cost him a point. "They all came out the same year, and they were also R rated. Hmmh, I'll choose The Breakfast Club"
Your analysis was just mindless bragging really. You knew the answer the moment he started reading the question, because the anecdote came during a time he heard you listening to the movie's soundtrack ("Did you know that my dad...")
"You complain about Paul all the time, but you're just the same" he comments. "She's a real competitor, people!"
You flush in embarrasment. "Okay, that's one for me. Next question" you read the card in your hands. "What pet do I own? An orange cat named Louis after my favorite singer, a fish, or a Shih Tzu named after my brother"
The orange cat lives with you both. You're curious as to how he'll answer.
"You aren't naming a Shih Tzu frickin' Fernando" he laughs, so loud, it ends up catching up to you and the crew. "I'll go with the cat"
"That's correct" you lament. "How would you know?"
As if the damn cat doesn't love him more than he loves you.
"I follow you on Instagram" he defends himself. Clever. "We are, um, what do you call it-"
"Oomfs"
"I'm not gonna try to pronounce your made up language. Okay, my turn. Which of these characters I've played in Saturday Night Live? Naughty daddy, protective mom, or weird uncle who has a creepy sneeze" he reads out loud in a confused tone.
This is easy. It was all over your timeline.
"Protective mom" you answer on a beat.
"This isn't fair, that was really popular!" he complains.
"It's still two for me and one for you" you mock. "Now, what is the nickname the internet has given me? I won't give you clues because it's an easy one"
"Easy? You said we were million of years apart and now I'm supposed to know?"
"Well, you seem to manage Instagram so I think you'll be just fine" you tease, and Pedro just wants to rip that smirk off of you. So he caves in first.
"It's people's princess"
"What?!" your eyes grow comically large, shimmering with betrayal as you shout with an incredulous tone. "I can't believe you know" more like can't believe you said it.
"You're royalty! How am I supposed to not know that, internet darling? Besides, told you: I keep my eye on you" and he winks.
This motherfucker. Oh, he's totally sleeping on the couch tonight.
"Talk about internet darlings" your snarky tone comes out, and Pedro knows he's pissed his competitive wife off. "I guess we have a tie. Your turn"
"What are the initials of my full name?" his brows furrow. "I forget. JBPP, JPBP, JBPP"
"José Pedro Balmaceda Pascal" you recite. "B, of course"
"But that's too easy, everyone with Google knows it!" but then he's leaning into your ear, whispering in a very low voice to make sure only you hear. "I'll let it pass, though. Love hearing you pronounce my name, mami"
Your face grows obscenely red. "I'm back ahead. Let's see if you can keep up. Okay, here it goes" you read the card, "what is the director I've stated I want to work with? Greta Gerwig, Pedro Almodóvar, or Quentin Tarantino"
"Pedro Almodóvar, no? You said you were jealous I had already worked with him" he playfully nudges you. Too much contact, face hot again. Maybe in group interviews you'll do better, because right now, you're doing a rather poor job at controlling yourself, even as an actor; you can already picture your agent pulling her hair behind the cameras.
"It's Greta Gerwig, actually"
"What?! No way, you told me this!" he grumbles. "This game is rigged"
"Don't get me wrong, I'm still jealous. I just think working with Greta Gerwig is peak womanhood, and I gotta live that. So, Greta, if for some reason this silly video gets to you, call me. I promise I'm not that childish"
"She is" Pedro slips in, "don't call her. So unprofessional" in a mocking exaggerated tone.
"Whatever, you sore looser. Me three, you two. Next!"
"Fine. Which of these songs would I have played at my funeral? My Heart Will Go On, Purple Rain, Nothing Compares To You"
He looks at you, silently pleading you to not answer correctly. Your competitive side screams in agony.
"I have no idea. Why do I feel you've already said it somewhere, though? I'll go with Nothing Compares To You, because the first its too corny for you and the second too epic"
He scoffs, amused at the fact that you did obey, but at what cost? Pedro's well aware his princess can get as competitive, if not worse, than Paul.
"You're saying I'm not epic enough for Purple Rain? Too bad, because that's the answer" you grunt, crossing your arms. "That's right, I am cool enough to have it played. I guess we're tied again!"
"No, you don't loose a point. It's still three to two. This just gives you the opportunity to tie"
"W-wait a minute"
"Settle down" you pat his thigh, "you can still try, handsome"
He gulps when your hand meets his skin, despite the layer of clothes. It's still something that gets him on edge, no matter the years you've known each other. And handsome? You came here for blood.
"Okay, here's your chance: what image of me became trending topic on twitter? An image of me eating a typical dish from my country, an image of me watching Deadpool and Wolverine with glasses while Hugh Jackman's shirtless scene reflects on them or C, me meeting Taylor Swift at the backstage of the Eras Tour"
"The typical dish is tempting" he muses out loud, "but I'll go with the Taylor Swift one because that sounds like something that'd trend"
"You're right" you throw your card. "I'm not complaining though. Best day of my life"
"Does this mean I'm winning?" he beams excitedly. "Oh, in your face Paul! I will finally win something!"
"Slow down, cowboy. There's still some left"
He purses his lips. "Let me have this one thing, would you? Guess not. Here it comes" he starts to read his card, "At school I competed in state competitions, in which sport? Soccer, lacrosse, swimming"
"Swimming" you answer hastily, trying not to think on Pedro wearing tight little swimsuits, as you've only seen him wearing swim trunks.
"Okay, that's dissapointing. Please continue"
"I participated in which play while I was in highschool? Hamlet, The Iliad or Much Ado About Nothing"
You doubt he remembers. The only time it ever came up, was when you visited your parent's house and a photography of you during said play was showed to him by your dad.
"The Iliad, right?" you laugh. The answer is wrong: It's Hamlet. "What? I swear it was that one! It's just you have very..." beautiful is at the tip of his tongue but he refrains himself, "...very greek features"
You can't help but laugh.
"Why of course! This is a face people go to war for"
"I agree" your heart skips a beat, "but I don't think I'll make it that far, if we talk about a war"
"You big fat liar!" you slap his arm playfully. "You've played all sort of characters, from soldiers of all nationalities and places, and like, superheroes, f*****g Joel Miller, even a DEA agent. You at least learned something!"
"Wow, slow down, this isn't a filmography recount" he jokes. Liar, you mouth to the cameras. "Okay, last one: I became a viral sensation for eating what type of sandwhich in LADbible's snack wars: BLT, PB&J, grilled cheese"
You remember the video fondly. Even your brother had sent it to you, along a text that said: Isn´t this your husband?
"PB&J, I win!" you cheer, instantly getting off the chair to do a celebratory dance. Pedro doesn't say anything, just throwing the cards away while the fondness of his eyes betrays him.
pyramiidsf: i want someone to look at me the way pedro looks at y/n mybritishstyle: guys they're just friends 😭 he's like that with all his female co-stars ㅤㅤann-gell: mybritishstyle me when i'm delusional af mandoshoney: where's that girl that's always betting her grandma??? SHE WAS RIGHTFLKRGJ
"Hello, I'm Paul Mescal. I'm here with my friends from the cast of Gladiator II" Connie and you both raise your palms to greet the camera, laughing when you realized you'd done it at the same time, "and we are going to play a game about how well we know each other for Vanity Fair" the irish man introduces the interview you're filming today.
"Did they prompt you?" Pedro speaks up, "or did you just make that up on the fly?"
You laugh a bit too loud, hoping they cut it off in the editing process.
Paul goes first, taking up a card with the first question written on it.
"Okay. Question: What's my least favorite day of the week?"
"Tuesday" answers Joseph once Paul is done reading. "Oh, you're writing it down?"
"Yeah" he answers.
"You just wrote Tuesday" Connie points out, Paul's card on his legs. You laugh along the rest.
"Yeah" he repeats laughing. "I actually, when you said Tuesday" Yeah, he said Tuesday Pedro adds on the background of laughter. "I was like...I'm gonna give everybody a point for that"
"I think I deserve a point for being observant" Connie complains.
Everyone gets a point and Paul moves towards the next question.
"What was the name of my character in Normal People?"
"Connell" both you and Joseph answer, looking at each other before squinting your eyes playfully.
"Callum" Pedro answers out loud at the same time, and you laugh. He clearly had slept when you played it for a re-watch last summer.
"No, you're out" Paul pokes Pedro next to him.
"Connel" Joseph repeats, and Fred agrees to the same answer.
Paul then asks Connie what's hers after he confirms you three.
"Connor?" she asks, confused.
"Incorrect. Three points" while pointing you three.
"You got wrong" he tells Pedro, "Callum's a different character"
"See? You just don't pay attention when you watch things" you blurt out, stopping yourself before adding the with me. It would be harder to come back from that, but so is this as everyone looks at you, even your husband, subtle panic in his eyes. Where the cameras this close? How long had you been silent?
"It's just, quick funny story" you improvise. "Pedro didn't know much about Paul's career, and as I am a fan, I took the time to show him and recommend him your stuff" Paul smiles. "Clearly, my fanatism didn't rub on Pedro but a girl can try"
He laughs, before saying "So the answer is Connell" and you try so hard to remain normal like the energy hasn't shifted.
"He only plays characters with the letter C in the name" Pedro jokes, chewing on a toothstick he seemingly pulled out of nowhere. More laughs follow, and you are so grateful for how he's handling your little metida de patada.
"What's number one on my bucket list?" he asks next, "and don't look at my answer"
The marker is the only sound to be heard, and then Pedro jokingly tries to take a peek.
"No peeking" Connie berates as Pedro laughs.
"You're not gonna be able to see that" Paul replies in an anyways tone.
You repeat the same joke, before Fred blocks you. "Not you too!"
Paul finishes after a while, Connie commenting it was long. Joseph raises his hand.
"Yes, Joseph"
"Is it to see the Great Wall of China?" he asks.
"No, but it's in that-"
"It's close, isn't it?" you interrupt.
"...family of thought" he finishes.
"It's to go and see something" Pedro points out.
"Okay. Rajasthan" tries Connie. "Go to Rajasthan, for a tour"
"Travel to South America" Paul interrupts with the correct answer, "I've never been to South America"
"I'm from South America" Pedro comments, never missing a chance to shout out his dear Chile.
Paul jokes about him getting three points while the rest of you laugh.
"I was born in South America. 17 points for Pedro"
"I want points too" you jump on the joke. "I know Spanish, so I can take you there and avoid you getting lost, mi querido amigo"
"But who was born there?" Pedro counters, "you get no points"
"I think Joseph is the only person who gets a point there" Paul adds, "because everybody just jumped on the bandwagon"
"He said to visit the Great Wall of China" Pedro protests, "which is nowhere near South America"
"It really is not" Connie agrees.
"Qué gente tan tramposa" you complain. "That's unfair. I remove my offer"
"Think about bucket list, and he came up with travel to bit" he tries to reason Joseph's point.
"And by the way, where in South America?" Pedro questions.
"Don't fight, don't fight" pleads Joseph, the calm one. Fred just sits there, enjoying the chaos.
"I want, any, I want to do a big tour of everywhere" Mescal defends himself.
Pedro doesn't back down. "'Cause it's very different"
Paul starts to get angry too. Jesus, men. Competitive men of it all.
"I know it's very different" making an annoyed face.
"Well, different is nice" you intervene, a hand placing in Pedro's left shoulder. "If you stop giving points for free, I'll come with you to the big everywhere tour"
"Alright" Paul agrees. "When's my birthday?" is the next question.
"February" all of you say.
Joseph struggles with the date first, saying seventh, then fourth. Fred tries with ninth, Pedro with eight, and then Joseph starts counting from one to two. Fred counts from eleven to twelve.
"Second" Mescal reveals. "Point to Joseph"
"Oh my God, you guys are good" Connie mentions.
"That's all my questions" and it's time to move on the next one: which happens to be your dear husband, Pedro.
"Paul is like" he brings up while the toothpick dances on his teeth, "Paul is motivated to catch up on points. He's coming for you" to pick on his competitive side as Mescal looks deep in thought.
"He's coming. He's coming" Joseph repeats as Fred laughs.
"What is my full name?"
"Oh! Pedro-" Paul tries in a blink. "Something, J? Jose? Juan?"
"Pedro Pascal, something, something" says Joseph.
"Nope"
"No?"
"Pedro Maria, Jose Maria Pascal" Paul struggles.
Pedro is about to answer when your voice cuts through the air.
"It's José Pedro Balmaceda Pascal" you recite.
"It indeed is!" he says, smiling a bit too much. "She gets a point"
"Jose Pedro Balmaceda Pascal" your husband repeats in a more english-friendly pronunciation, looking at the camera while toying with his toothpick.
"I said Jose, I said Jose" Paul protests.
Pedro shakes his head. "You said Jose, but then you put it-"
Connie takes Paul's side. "You did say Jose"
"But then you put it behind Pedro which eliminate- which disqualified you" he replies.
Paul gets angry. That sore looser.
"That's absolute bullshit"
"Don't worry mate, the game has just begun" you joke, making the man more irritated. "Think you can get ahead of me?"
"Joseph is still ahead, y/n" Paul counters, still irritated. "Besides, wouldn't it be cheating? You can speak Spanish!"
"So? Not like speaking a language allows you to know every person's name Paul" you mock. He just snorts, despite still being half angry. Pedro is allowed to continue, trying not to make a face at yours and Paul's banter.
"The question is, who is my favorite actor?" he reads. As the cast members laugh, he uncaps the marker with his mouth, and now you have to try not to make a face, thinking about those teeth sinking into your flesh.
Quinn raises his hand. "It's me"
"That you're my favorite actor?"
"Yeah. You said that to me once" the bald man sounds sure of it.
Paul tries to think in the background. So do you. How can you not know this? he must've brought it up at least once.
"Do you remember?" Joseph insists.
Pedro finally remembers. "I said you were- I said I thought you were special"
"Oh" he sounds rather dissapointed.
"And special can mean a lot of things" he jokes, laughing by himself. Fred laughs with you as Joseph makes a face, your laughter turning even louder when you notice Paul all moody, trying to get this point.
"Who's your favorite actor?" Paul asks, "I think we just have to shoot from the hip here guys"
"Marlon Brando?" Connie guesses.
"Is it Harrison Ford?" Fred guesses.
"Let's go with Harrison Ford just because he's my favorite actor..."
You can't believe you didn't know this. You've re-watched and watched so many Star Wars content together. He gives you a brief look, knowing you're embarrased at your lack of answer.
"As a kid?"
"He's most influent, yeah" Pedro agrees.
"What job did I have before I became a full-time actor?" is next.
"Dancer. You were a great dancer" Paul aswers. Both Fred and Joseph repeat it, adding he was specifically a go-go dancer.
"Oh, he is" you add. "Videos of you dancing are lovely. Ever thought of getting back in the bussiness?"
He laughs, what appears to be a light blush creeping up his cheeks.
"Sure, darling. When you ask me to dance, I'll be there"
Nobody comments on this, too busy waiting for Pedro to say yes or no to the answer they believe to be right. But he isn't saying it is. Now you remember why.
"Come on, come on, come on" Paul begs.
"Can any of you guys remember?" Pedro pleads.
They insist that he danced in Spain, then New York, then settle with Spain again, even Pedro confirming so. But it still isn't the answer written on the card, no matter how much the boys insist.
"Connie?" he tries. She just looks confused.
"The answer in the card is-"
"Waiter" you answer. "You were a waiter"
Now you have three points under your belt.
"Why do you always say the answer at last?!" Paul grumbles. "You are cheating!"
"I'm not" you laugh the accusation off. "You just can't accept I'm better"
"Si que lo eres" Pedro agrees. "Es divertido hacer que se enoje Paul"
"What did you say about me? It's not fair, you're probably sharing the answers!" he's still adamant on insisting with the supposed cheating issue, making you laugh.
Now it's Connie's turn, who starts with: "How many languages do I speak?"
You put a puzzled look.
"You speak seven, eight maybe" Joseph guesses. Pauls says she speaks french, "but most likely seven"
Pedro points his finger at him. "Once he gets going, he's on a roll"
"Joe's got it" Connie agrees.
"Paul, end this reign" Pedro jokes. He looks rather frustrated.
"And the bonus points" Connie offers. "Okay, bonus, what are they?"
"This is an emperor's reign" your husband adds.
Joseph answers: Italian. Danish. English. Swedish. French. Spanish. Norwegian.
Connie agrees she speaks Spanish, making you jump in excitement.
"Oh, I didn't know that!" you beam. "Wait, does that mean you did get what Pedro and I gossiped about you?"
"What?" Joseph asks.
"Nada" you quickly correct yourself. "Yo no dije nada"
"Not that much. I just speak a bit of Spanish. I mostly dominate my own language, German and English"
"You blew our cover!" Pedro nags, hitting your bare leg, yet its devoid of anger.
"He needs a bonus" comments Connie, surprised at Joseph.
"This is horrifying" Pedro says when Joseph gets another point and a fricking bonus on top of that. "This is a slaughter"
"Oh, for which film did I have a gym built in my garage?"
Both Joseph and Paul answer the question correctly, saying Wonder Woman. The latter is quick to state they both get that point.
"That's one for me" Paul says, then looks at you. "And none for you"
You stick out your tongue at him as Connie reads the next card.
"If I were to take this cast on a vacation where would I take you?"
"Ibiza" answers Joseph. Connie agrees in Spanish, with a cute and excited correcto.
Your husband feels the need to crack a joke at Quinn's expense.
"Somebody was paying attention to Connie Nielsen very closely during the shooting of this movie"
"Okay. What is my favorite curse word in Danish?"
"Fuck" Pedro tries.
"No"
"Nobody is going to get that, Connie" Paul bickers.
"Oh, I don't know any Danish" you lament.
"At least now you know how it feels" Mescal drops, making you snort. You playfully kick him on the ribs with your shoe.
"It's very simple" Connie gives as a clue. "It's the same word in every language"
"Shit" Paul tries.
"Satan" she reveals.
Everybody is laughing in confusion at that, saying there's no way you could use that.
"Vos Satan!" Connie curses.
Now it's Fred's turn.
"What is my weirdest on-set habit?"
"I haven't noticed you do anything weird on set" Paul tells.
"I have" Pedro interrupts.
They all get on a small briefing about what could it possibly be, that it was weird, and wasn't part of his character, as you ponder. It was funny before, but now Paul is behind you by a point. So think fast.
"Yeah. I would say being yourself" Pedro jokes, but surprisingly, it works.
"Me! Five points for Pedro" he celebrates as you all laugh. "Love Fred. Oh, Fred"
"Oh, oh, okay" he moves to the next question. "What is my favorite reality TV show?"
Joseph tries with Survivor and Paul with Alone. Truth is, you don't watch any show of said kind, only vagely hearing about Love Island.
"You and I have talked about reality TV" Pedro reveals, "It's just that we never identified one"
They keep guessing shows that sound like a foreign language to you.
"You know what's offensive? That I'm the second youngest of this cast and I have no idea what are you all talking about"
"She's not to be trusted" Pascal quips, "can't trust someone who doesn't appreciate the art of reality TV"
You huff, annoyed.
"Is it A&E stuff?" Pedro asks.
"Yeah, it's the competitive cheapskates" Fred answers. "It's people that really save money on everything"
Pedro gets the point because he mentioned the A&E bit.
"There's like this amazing guy that made a stew out of fish bones, and I just thought it was incredible" he shares. Then, moves to the next question. "What is my go-to crafty snack?"
Nobody remembers eating snacks on set, and Fred gives the clue that it's a drink. Joseph says it's a smoothie, and he does remember it but it isn't the answser.
"I'm thinking of something specific. That Emerge-C that you put in the water"
"Oh, that's very good" you agree, so does the rest, even discussing the best colors
"Who in the cast would I ask to bail me out of jail?"
Everyone even Pedro agree its him. Everyone gets a point, yet Joseph remains ahead.
It's Joseph's turn. "What is my favorite sport?"
"Skateboarding" Paul is so quick to answer, earning him two points for both being correct and time.
"What celebrity do I get mistaken for?"
"Daisy Edgar-Jones sometimes" says Mescal. Of course he had to bring her up.
"No, she gets mistaken for me" Joseph jokes. "Yeah, poor Daisy. But I'm writing it down"
"That was the two letters?" Pedro notices. Still, no one gets it.
It's fucking Justin Timberlake. You'd never guess that.
"What is my favorite film franchise?"
You've probaly named all the existing franchises to no avail. You think fo your dad, a huge geek, trying to remember if there is one missing.
"Oh- Lord of the Rings!" you both answer with Paul at the same time.
"C'mon!" his celebration is short lived when he realizes you tied to him.
"What is my favorite British slang word?"
Pedro says it can't be said, but Quinn insists they can, even adding it's his favorite one too.
"We can say bad words? We can say-?" but the camera beeps over it.
The answer is Bellend. What even is that? Joseph feigns sadness and Pedro keeps apologizing, even as you sit on the chair.
"Okay. I'm last"you wiggle your eyebrows with interest. "Let's see. Okay, first question: what did I take from the Gladiator II set?"
"You took something?" Joseph asks on disbelief.
"Why wouldn't I take something?"
"Is it like an item or memorabilia?" asks Connie.
"It's an item" you uncap the marker, scribbling down the answer.
"It's a short word" Fred points out, but still can't provide a guess.
"You took the rings home" Pedro answers. You snap your had on his way, probably obvious. "What? You told me" he says.
Of course Paul complains. "Hey, that isn't fair! He knew the answer before!"
"Well, if you payed more attention to me, you'd know it"
Lies. Pedro knows because it's sitting in the jewelry box inside your house.
"See? I do pay attention" Pedro playfully hits Mescal.
"I could pay you more attention" he looks at you.
"Alright, then do. Ready? Next question: what is my go-to movie? Oh, this is a good one. I'm always changing it, but most of the time I end up choosing the same one"
They all give you a puzzled look as you scribble.
"C'mon, guys! I've said it on interviews before too. Paul?" the man shrugs. "Thought you said you'd pay me more attention. Heads up, you're doing a terrible job so far!"
"Hey!" he protests. "It's not fair if the answer's changing. Give us a clue"
"You didn't give any clues to yours!" you giggle. "Besides, I don't want you to win"
"Hey, that's against the rules!"
"I'd say it depends on the season" Pedro speaks up. You quirk an eyebrow. "Like, if it's changing, I don't think your Christmas go-to movie is the same as your summer one"
"Actually" you smile fondly, "that is true. On summer, it's Mamma Mia. So I suppose, if you can't guess the one, that'll do"
"No" he smiles, cheeky. "I know it too"
"Yeah?" you challenge, "what is it, then?"
"It's Thelma and Louise" he answers, and your heart beats fast.
"How do you know?" Paul inquires. "Somebody was paying attention to Y/n L/n very closely during the shooting of this movie"
Ah, his joke from earlier. Joseph giggles behind him. Karma, he supposes.
"She said it on an interview, guys. C'mon, learn your sources!"
"Okay" you clear your throat. "What movie got me into acting?"
"Thelma and Louise" Joseph tries.
"No" you laugh, "you're just recycling the answer"
"Is it an old or modern movie?" Connie asks.
"Hmh, old" you pause, "just not... I don't know if you'll ever guess it"
"Is it a Pedro Almodóvar film?" you shake your head. "What? You're always mentioning him!"
Pedro looks into your eyes amid the others' discussion, and you can tell he remembers the conversation.
"There isn't one"
You smile, chest pounding at his soft tone.
"That's correct"
"A trick question?!" Paul yells. "I quit"
"When there's just one left?" you tease.
"Yes, because you've been hiding it all the time but no more" he counters, pointing both you and Pedro. You feel the space getting smaller, breaths going from even to noticeable. "You are sharing answers"
You try to make your breath of relief pass as a chuckle.
"I'm not even gonna win, relax. And drop the charges, please. Loose like a man"
"You didn't explain it though" Connie speaks. "What did Pedro mean?"
"While I have many movies that are inspiration to me, they aren't the reason I chose this path. I did it because I saw an Oscar's ceremony when I was 11" you explain fondly, feeling warm at the memories. "I still remember when they handed the award to Diablo Cody for best original screenplay. I don't know, man, it moved me. What it meant for young artists who came from nothing. I guess I wanted, one day, to be the one standing there, for other dreamers to see it's possible"
"Wow, that's beautiful" Connie says.
"Thank you" you get flustered. "Suppose it was worth it, you know, to do interviews about not really knowing my cast mates" and laugh.
"How does Pedro know, though?" Joseph asks.
"We talk a lot" you clear your throat. "Last one: what indie horror movie did I make a small appearence in? I'm feeling generous because it's the last so I'll give you a clue. It's a Stephen King adaptation"
Paul is the first to speak. "You where in a-"
"Yeah but it wasn't such a huge role. Don't make yourself any ideas"
"I have no idea" Connie surrenders. "Other clue, as in how many words?"
"It doesn't even have any words" you laugh. "You give up? It's 1922. Was an extra as well. Made me think Netflix had my name highlighted in the extra call sheet, because I did so many minor and background roles during that year. Grateful, though, because now I get to be Rome's empress and not fortune teller or highschool #6"
The interview ends, and the camera may or may have not captured the last seconds, Pedro's gaze fixated with you the entire time.
elysyannemimi: we all saw that right? GET PEDRO AND Y/N IN A ROMCOM ❗THEIR CHEMISTRY IS INSANE❗ at0michips: love paul and y/n so much 😭😭 gimme enemies to lovers RN ㅤㅤbobgirllll: at0michips wait what if paul and y/n are secretly dating 😳 ㅤㅤann-gell: bobgirllll quick question are u dumb unhing3dprincess: i bet my grandma they're married. it has to be. trust me ㅤㅤstarlightt180: unhing3dprincess BESTIE U ARE BACK
You arrived in London today. The premiere will be in a few days, and things have been, well, hectic.
Lux couldn't stop talking all the plane ride, but your mind kept going back at the email your manager had sent you before you had boarded the plane.
It's catching upon you, read the haunting message. Attached below, a TMZ article that claimed a regular church attendee had seen you both getting married. It also used a lot of the noise fans had been making on social media, connecting dots or just hyping up the undeniable chemistry. It ended with a little paragraph saying it was obvios, and they're just hoping you'd confirmed it.
You came to realize you didn't care about it anymore. Sure, the pushing around annoyed you, but the thought of still keeping your marriage under wraps feels pointless now. Why wouldn't you shout to the world how in love with your husband you are?
Yet, when you arrive at the hotel, you keep the same protocol of arriving after Pedro, who has already checked in with two keys, claiming its for him and his sister, while you ask for the key to Lux's actual room. After you swipe cards with her, you head over the room you'd be sharing with your husband.
His face appears in your frame, everything happening quickly.
"Get inside. Now"
Your body is dragged inside the hotel room, not even giving you time to swipe the key for yourself.
"Pedro!" you exclaim, between surprised and confused. "What the hell is your problem?"
"Did you read it?"
"What? The article?" your tone is filled with annoyance. "Yes, I did. Why?"
"What do you mean why?" he snaps, voice raising higher. "Don't play dumb with me. You know fans have fuelled the rumors, and tabloids have started digging every corner in fucking California"
"So, what? You're acting as if people finding out is the worst thing in the world" you roll your eyes.
"It is, yes!" Pedro bursts out, caving in to the stress.
It feels like you've been hit across your face.
"Excuse me?" you seethe, hurt etched all across your features. "Would it be the worst thing in the world to admit you're married to the person you supposedly love the most?"
"I love you, y/n. It's just-"
His voice softens, trying to reach for you, yet you pull back, his hand falling to his side in an akward manner. He sighs in frustration, running a hand through his hair as he sits on the edge of the bed.
"I love you" he repeats, sounding much more sure this time.
Your frame seems smaller as your voice comes out hoarse, filled with emotion, appearing to be in the brink of tears:
"Then why do you act like you're embarrassed of me?"
He hates himself for making you feel this way, making you think things that aren't true.
"I don't. Never" he emphasizes. Then, tries to reach once again when you move a little bit closer to him, recognizing that's your way of letting him know you're ready. "You're the most precious thing in the world to me, don't ever think the opposite" then he sighs, heavy. "I'm just scared"
You silently ask him to explain, rubbing his thumb soothingly across his tattoo.
"You're so young, and I'm, well- I know we're aware of it, but people are cruel and the press is ruthless. I don't want to see your name dragged across the mud because you decided to marry me. Your career is starting, and I'd never forgive myself is something happened to you because of me. Not trying to make this about me, yeah? But this industry is fucked up. You've work hard to get to where you are, and it'll be unfair if you'd loose it. I'm scared because us..." he wavers, words trailing off. "I want us to be. I wouldn't want to live in a world without you, i-it would kill me not to have you be my wife"
You desperately want to kiss off the worry on his face, but let him finish.
"N-not saying our love is weak, or anything! That a couple of opinions or tabloids will- you know? Just, I-I don't want them to break us apart. Mi vida, you're the light of my life. Please, forgive me, I-"
He feels his throat closing up, words failing to come out. You sense the grip on your hand to be stronger, immediately letting loose of it.
"Hey. C'mere" your voice is tender, allowing him to bury his face in your stomach as you comb his messy curls with your fingers. "It's okay, I'm here. I'm not going anywhere"
He lets himself melt under your touch, his mind loosing itself in the soft of your digits and your perfume up his nostrils. He's again breathing normaly, hands now hugging your waist.
"There you go. Better?" Pedro nods, still not being able to talk. "That's okay, take all the time you need. We have all day"
"Do we?" he raises his view, his eyes soft yet there is something else to the brown shade.
You hum as to nod. "We agreed to join Lux for dinner. It's barely 1pm"
"Tell me you're thinking it too" his voice cuts throughout the air, boucing off the tapestry on the walls.
You laugh, nervously. "I don't think I do"
"Hmmh, I see" he stands up, towering over you. "You sure you don't?"
"You sure you want this?"
Before you know it, his lips capture yours in a passionate kiss, cutting off all words to be said. What a waste of air, anyway. You are quick to reciprocate, whimpering against his lips.
Pedro picks you up like you're as light as a feather, his arms flexing as he carries you and places you on the bed, frame hovering over yours. He breaks the kiss to breath, but you're pulling him back in, his hold on your hips tighter and the wet spot in your panties wetter.
"Look at you, pretty baby. So needy" he whispers against your face, hot breath lingering above your lips. "And mine. Mía. Only mine"
"I am, yes. Yours only. Need you so bad right now, papi" you answer in a rush. "Now shut up and fuck me"
"Con gusto" he chuckles darkly, "gotta keep the wife happy"
"Happy wife, happy life" you recite, stripping him off of his plain shirt, revealing his toned torso, bulging biceps defined by the movements. You gulp. "Fuck, papi. Gotta thank Marvel for this. I love all of your versions, but I can work with this too" you dreamily stare at him, your hands cupping his face.
He strips the rest of his clothing, but a cute blush adorns his cheeks.
"Yeah, well, it's Scott's fault too"
Your impatient fingers reach the middle of your panties to rub your clothed pussy, letting out a sound that darkens his hazel orbs.
"Fuck that guy" you mutter. Pedro laughs.
"Thought you said you loved the guy"
"Until I learned what he said about your body" you groan, still rubbing. "Connie told me"
His hands now travel to remove your clothes, almost ripping them off.
"Who cares? I just want to fuck you now" he breathes out, practically drooling at the sight of your damp panties. "Lemme take this off too"
He unhooks your bra, seeing the hard nipples. The urge to lick them is so bad, but his desire to fill you silly to the brim is stronger.
You see his hesitation, which is why you grab him by the neck to pull him in for a kiss. He kisses back fiercely, labored breaths as he struggles to focus on your lips, his wet mouth darting to your jaw, neck and collarbones. His hands roam all over your body, needy.
"Gotta be inside of you, mami. Can't wait any longer"
"Then stop waiting" you plead, tugging at his boxers with urgency.
Seeing you so cockhungry, lips parted and pupils blown wide makes his hard dick twitch with anticipation.
He mutters a labored fuck, aligning himself to enter your sticky folds. Pedro enters your tight pussy with a low groan, burying himself deep inside of you, used to his length by now. You're basically begging for it, nails digging and eyes supplicating.
He can't deny you anything, can he?
A messy whine leaves your widened mouth as you adjust, pleasure mixed with pain.
"Mhmm" you moan.
"Mhmm what?" he mocks. "You asked for it. Now take it, cariño"
He thrusts deeper into you, watching in awe how his dick enters your pussy; it was always perfectly, your pussy made for him.
"You're drippin' baby" his rough voice caresses your cheek. He kisses the are, giving a lick to the sweat starting to form. "S'fucking tight too"
You move your hips towards him, trying to augment the friction. The overstimulation starts to cloud your sense, reducing you to a whiny mess as you grip his steady arms.
"I can't think of anything but you, baby" he confesses between grunts, "filling up your pussy to the brim, you dripping with my seed for days"
You moan at the filthy words.
"Love how you take my dick, amor" stretching you as Pedro moves in and out. "S'made for me"
"Yes" you moan, skin slapping sounds bouncing off the walls. "Fuck, I love your dick..."
His pace picks up, and it comes to a point where he's just fucking you silly, his grip on your hips surely to leave a bruise as you keep spilling obscene sounds of pleasure from your lips.
"Your pussy's mine, yeah? No one else gets to have you like this"
"N-no, just you, Pedro. My h-husband" you manage to squeeze, more moans vocalizing the pleasure you felt with each thrust, his big dick inside of you moving in a a steady rhythm, making your eyes roll back further and orgasm closer.
Your breasts bounce with each thrust, and he finds impossible to resist the urge anymore, licking the sensible skin and hard nipples, your hands moving to his back, scratching him harshly, both chasing your release.
"Please!" you whine out loud, not caring how desperate you sound.
Harder. Faster. Rougher.
But your husband knows you, so he indeed starts to fuck you harder, heavy breaths and slippy kiss noises hanging in the spaces between each thrusts. He pants with every motion of his dick, a knot forming on his belly.
"Shit, baby. I think I'm gonna cum. Gonna come so hard"
"Do it. I'm on birth control, remember?" you groan, feeling your high approach as well. "Fill me up, please. Give me all your cum"
Your bodies move as one, precise thrusts hitting exactly that sweet spot of yours repeatedly, chasing your orgasm. For a brief moment, your eyes lock with his and then he's saying:
"I love you, y/n. So much"
Your heart skips a bit, his dick twitching inside as his gaze glimmers with adoration and possesiveness, teeth grazing your skin with marks for him to call you his.
"I love you too, Pedro. More than you know"
A final thrust is delivered. Fuck, feels so good you think you hear him say. Just like promised, he fills you with his release, shots of his thick, warm cum inside your sticky walls. You follow soon, back arching, toes curling, and both head and eyes rolling back. Pedro falls on top of you, his broad body collapsing over yours, as you both pant hard, trying to steady your pulse and breath. He then removes himself and positions you to be the one on top now, lazily throwing the covers over your bare bodies. We need to shower, you said, but he argued you'd do it later before going out.
"I needed that" and you happily hum in agreement at your husband's dragged out words.
Your head falls and rises, with the movement of his chest, silence settling on the previously filled with sex noises room. That until he speaks up:
"One day, I'm gonna fill you up so good until you have my babies, mami" he murmurs, just then realizing what he said. But you snuggle closer, hand and legs drapped over his bare body. You look at him closely, seeing nothing but certainty on his eyes.
I choose you. I'll always choose you.
"Whatever it is with you" your nose brushes his, a small sweet kiss on his lips, "I want"
His eyes shine, probably with tears or the glow of affection.
"Let's do it"
"What?" you look into his eyes for any sign of doubt, bull all you see is love. "Pedro, are you serious?"
He nods. "Wouldn't you want that?"
You feel the corner of your lips pull up.
"Never have I wanted anything more"
poppysplayground: Y/N AND PEDRO RED CARPET DEBUT AT THE LONDON PREMIER OF GLADIATOR II WTF I JUST WOKE UP ptwt is in SHAMBLES mostannoyingbillioner: UM HELLO pedro showing up with two hot women on his arms LUX GIMME A CHANCE pompeiianbollockr: WAIT WDYM THEY ARE MARRIED?!??! ALL THIS TIME?@?#? HOW???! NEED BIGGER CAPS TO SCREAM I'M GOING INSANE at0michips: that article better come out now or i'll burn the TMZ building ann-gell: not me thirsting for a married man 😭😭😭 how they kept this a secret for so long?? we should've noticed ㅤㅤunhing3dprincess: ann-gell i did. knew betting my grandma was the way all along ㅤㅤpyramiidsf: i'm gonna start betting my grandma too
#dilfistwrites#gladiator II#gladiator ii#gladiator 2#pedro pascal#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal fanfic#pedro pascal smut#pedro pascal x you#pedro x reader#pedro pascal fluff#taylor swift#reputation#call it what you want#paul mescal
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hi!! i’ve been searching high and low for fanfic since seeing deadpool and wolverine LOL so i was wondering if you could do either head canons or a small fic (whichever you prefer) about deadpool x reader x wolverine? either a poly relationship or both of them trying to compete and woo reader? maybe it could take place during the movie events? tysm!
Your relationship with Wade and Logan oftentimes consisted of them trying to hog your for themselves, which leads to the other getting jealous and or upset, so much so to the point where they’ll end up squabbling over you preferred more.
This is not new as the pair seemingly have something against sharing but overtime it does get better and they’re less likely to fight over you and who gets your attention.
They’ve even had it scheduled out at one point but that didn’t last as either Wade or Logan would accuse the other of prolonging their time with you to the point it was intersecting with the other pre established times slots.
Logan: Oi scrotum face! You’ve been hogging them five minutes more than established!
Wade, acting coy as he clings onto you; oh am I? I’m pretty sure my cuddle session was 11:30 until 12:30pm-
Logan: it’s 12:35 dickhead!
Wade: *gasps* oh my gosh you’re right! I guess time must’ve slipped my mind when cuddling my pookie here *boops you on the nose*
Logan: *not too impressed*
When they’re not at each other’s throats over who you love more, they’re wooing you as though you’re not already fucking dating the pair of them. Particularly Wade more so than Logan. 💀
You’d find Wade draped across your bed with a rose held between in his hands, buck naked and with nothing but a pillow to cover his dick or ‘the surprise’ he calls it.
‘You can peg me tonight.’ ;) - Wade
‘I am so honoured, ass up baby girl.’ - you (probably)
Logan isn’t use to soft touches of love, he really isn’t and so if you were to ever kiss the places where his wounds once were before they healed, he’d melt. His smile is soft as he silently watched you kiss the knuckles, completely unafraid of his claws popping out and or caressing the calluses on his palms. At long last his soul was at ease, his mind was quiet as all Logan could focus on was you being tender and soft with him as though he hadn’t lived through the past 200 years of pain, trauma and suffering.
You treated him like he was just Logan Howlett and nothing more, not wolverine, not weapon X, just Logan and only Logan for that’s who the man sitting next to you was. You helped numb the pain whilst holding his hand through the nights were he awakes breathless and his claws out and ready.
Logan panics if he were to see that he accidentally nicked you with his claws during his nightmares, for hurting you was the last thing he ever wanted to do, and would try to push you away whenever you tried to get closer to him. He has hurt you and he shouldn’t be worthy of your comfort when all he could see was the really small nick on your arm.
‘Logan-‘
‘Don’t. I hurt you.’
‘It’s only a small cut, I’m fine Logan please.’
‘No! What if next time I cut you badly?’
Your heart broke whenever he got like this, so naturally you had to force yourself into his arms and make him come to terms with the fact that he would never hurt your willingly and grab ahold of his face, resting your foreheads together as you told him to focus on you and your breathing; showing him that you were alive and well.
Wade might as well have whined when you kissed his skin where wounds should’ve been before they healed. They’re his favourite moments between the two of you and would even imitate it back to you, but without the wounds, so it’s just him kissing your skin wherever whenever. He might even blow raspberries to keep the spirit of your somewhat goofy relationship alive and well.
Wade has photos of your dates, movie nights and such kept in somewhere in his room, whether that he a box or album, he has them and will look at them and smile because he’s a sap for making memories that’ll live forever much like him. He cares deeply about you and would even keep tokens or other random things as mementos too.
Some are more weirder than others.
‘This was a ticket when we went to the arcade.’
‘Oh this is that stick we both said looks like a penis when we took Dogpool to the dog park.’
‘This was the bandaid that you tried to use to cover my wounds before you found out either of me or wolvie could heal-‘
Logan and Wade don’t like to share, that we already know, but if someone who wasn’t aware of your polyamorous relationship with the two and decided to shoot their shot, they’d know first hand how much these men don’t play with you as Wade verbally beats them down with his crude sense of humour and Logan hovers over you, glaring as the poor person until they’ve ran away with their tail between their legs.
Remy?
Logan would growl and glare at the man while keeping a possessive hand on your waist, tugging you to his side to show that you were taken, or even have you wear his jacket to further get the point across to Remy.
Wade would just make a big joke out of it all the while having his hand in your back pocket. ‘You cant have our pookie, go get your own magic mike.’
Also when it comes to cuddling at night your either between Wade and Logan or Logan is in between you and Wade, or Wade is in between you and Logan. It changes now and then but when you’re in the middle of them both, it’s the safest you’ll ever be in your entire life, nothing can get to you and you can rest easily knowing that you’ve got two men who’d do anything to keep you safe and secure.
#mcu x you#mcu x reader#mcu imagines#mcu x y/n#mcu imagine#marvel x you#marvel x reader#marvel imagine#marvel x y/n#marvel imagines#deadpool x you#deadpool imagines#deadpool imagine#deadpool x reader#wade wilson imagines#wade wilson x reader#wade wilson imagine#wolverine imagine#wolverine imagines#wolverine x reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett imagine#Logan howlett imagines#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool
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“Easy,” I murmur, “easy.” I show her what a deep breath looks like, trying to steady her growing panic. Her body shakes, her blue eyes wide, sweat glistens across her forehead. I rub my thumb against her knuckles, her hand gripping mine like life depends on it.
“It hurts,” she whimpers, eyes closing with a hard wince. My other hand closes around her jaw and I softly blow hair into her face to cool her down.
“I've got you, darling.”
She shakes her head in refusal, a cry bubbling up her throat, “oh. Oh.”
“Tension isn't helping our baby, please relax.” She gives me a look that makes me want to bury myself alive to recover from it. A hopeless scared gaze that makes me want to claw out my eyes on top of being five feet underground.
“Help me,” she whines, “get him out of me.”
I flash a look at the royal healers around me, their eyes mildly impatient. I give them a cold stern look that has them shifting into action to avoid my ire.
“I'm still convinced it's a little girl,” I smile, brushing her hair that's matted onto her forehead.
“There's nothing little about her then,” she groans and shifts away from me, her body locking up, “no, not again,” she cries and her fingernails dig into me. I have several of these wounds now but I can't even register it with the way I've been watching her so intently.
“Breathe,” I remind her quickly, “breath in and out. Relax your jaw.”
Her teeth are bared to the world, the entirety of her rigid, airless.
“Breathe,” I bark, my worry crawling up my mouth.
She does but the sound that leaves with it is enough to drive me over an edge. My hand leaves her face and falls onto the swell of her stomach, bare to the room, our child begging to escape it. A blanket covers her lower half and I'm tempted to tear it away to see if there is progress. A healer beats me to it, bending my wife’s knee up and opening her legs like a butterfly, blanket falling away.
“That's the sound we were waiting for, your majesty,” the midwife coos gently. “You’re ready to start pushing. It’ll all be over soon.”
Terror strikes me like a hard fist to the jaw and I sit there in stunned silence. My wife on the other hand starts a tantrum, limps a chaos as she tries to leave the bed. None of us expect this but with her so bloated, she barely makes it before I'm holding her still, pinning to the mattress. Her eyes are crazed and dazed with pain and anger.
“I am not pushing,” she hisses at me as if I was the one who suggested it.
“Are you saying that because you're afraid of the pain or because you don't think you can do it?” I challenge, raising an eyebrow. I dare to let my hand travel down between her legs, my fingers breaching the now expanded opening. I almost groan, “darling,” my head slumps towards her with near relief, “you are so close.” I feel the spot of thin hair, the curvature of a baby’s head. Our child.
“Get your fingers out of me,” she groans, whimpering.
“First I've heard that one,” I smirk. She flashes me a warning look that I eat up.
She again seems to be primed with a retort when both hands furiously find the bottom sheet. Giving my hand, wrist, and arm a break from her piercing touch. A terrified little yelp breaks from her mouth and one leg loses grip on the bedding and kicks out.
“Oh please,” she heartbreakingly pleads. So unlike my vicious wife. “Make it stop.”
I instinctively brush my knuckles to her cheek, my other hand resting low on her stomach. “You need to push, darling,” I press on her skin, “and hard. You're going to be just fine if you do that.”
She says something incoherent, a blubbering mess of raw emotion, exhaustion, and pain. Still she does what we all hoped, pushed. Her face tight with determination, chin to her chest, the sound of an animal in full heat coming out of her. She's never looked so beautiful.
“That's it,” I encourage softly and twist, getting a cold cloth for her forehead and neck. She relaxes instantly, tears streaming down her face.
“I can't do this,” she says, voice breaking.
“Of course you can,” I say softly.
She shakes her head in defiance of my words. Head tipping back against the pile of pillows behind her. My wife shrieks, her body shaking violently. “No, please, no,” she begs.
“It comes, your majesty, push,” the healer beckons.
My focus waivers between how vulnerable and how strong my wife is in this moment that I too am breathless for a spell before I am smiling, staring down at the peek of dark hair.
“I see her, darling, push oh please push.” Our ‘please’ is so contrasting that I laugh. She follows my suggestion and cries out again, this time her hand finding my forearm and holding tight. She looks at me, a face full of unabashed fear and loathing, “you did this to me.”
I still can't wipe the joy from my face so my, “I know,” comes out manic.
She whimpers, tears cascading down her face and mingling with sweat. She swears colorfully. That head of dark hair moves forward and now holds her folds open and taut. She's screaming loud enough to break the windows and I'm there, holding her head against mine, getting closer and closer. “Shh, it's almost over, you're doing so well.”
“Small pushes now, blow out, stretch wide,” the healer mimics the breathing she wants to achieve but my wife just lets out the most pathetic of whimpers.
“Hurts,” she mumbles.
“You're amazing. I'm so impressed,” my lips brush into her sweaty hair.
“Don't say that like you're surprised,” she huffs at me.
I chuckle, leaning back to take in her burning blue eyes. “I'm not surprised.”
“Just a few more pushes,” the healer coaxs.
I watch the head pop out with a bit of liquid and a shrill cry from my partner, who now pants wildly, eyes lidded with weariness. “Pull it out,” she demands, narrowing her gaze to menacing.
“You'll push in a minute here,” the healer amends for her.
“Just take it out,” she begs and then groans deeply, eyes closing quickly, “ohhh nooo” I watch in fascination as the baby starts to rotate slowly.
“Hold on, dearie,” the healer tugs the cord up and over our child’s head eliminating a threat against its life already. “Open these legs wider for me, there you go. Push, push, push.”
Thankfully my wife follows her orders. Her face bright red, and voice raising as more and more of the child emerges. Unceremoniously the screaming is replaced by the baby who now flails around in her mother's arms. Her. Our daughter. My wife and I lock eyes, her face split with adorable shock as if she hadn't just gone through all the work to make this happen. I slump towards them both, my adrenaline wearing off and I'm realizing my own hand has left crescent moons into my flesh from concern. I relax my body and take a deep breath.
“Thank gods,” I murmured to no one in particular. I look up timidly to my wife who wipes our baby with a towel and scrunches her entire chin towards her neck to get a better look at the purple screeching face. Our daughter finally has a lapse in annoyance and her eyes open, stormy gray eyes forming a perfect mirror to gaze into. My wife drops back, a lifeless laugh forcing out of her, “all that only for her to look like you.” She sounds both bitter and proud.
I grin, “she will no doubt be a stunner like me then.”
She huffs loudly but matches my smile, content with such a notion.
“The next one will look like you.”
Her jaw drops open. “The next one?!”
#birth#birth fic#giving birth#birth kink#painful birth#graphic birth#fantasy#fanfic#vanilla birth#fluff
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starring: eddie brock x male reader x venom
request: hi!! can i request a eddie brock/venom x male reader smut where eddie finally introduces reader to venom and venom can’t help but let all his dirty thoughts about what he wants to do to reader out. i’m talking bondage, breeding, ass eating (ikyk his tongue goes crazy)
warnings: smut, monster fucking, freaky!venom, HUGE DICK VENOM, unprotected sex, creampie, ass eating, cum eating, ball and dick cleaning i guess
as much as eddie did NOT want to introduce you and venom, the pestering was getting a little to much from the both of you so he decided finally it was time, calling you over to his apartment and slowly letting venom come out from his shoulder, a floating head connected to a tendril coming out of your boyfriends back was weird but you've seen weirder.
"y/n meet venom and venom meet y/n" eddie says "pleased to eat you y/n" venom says without mush of a filet, your ass was nice looking and he wanted that "pleased to eat you to venom" you shake one of his tendrils and immediately wipe the sort of slime on your pants.
"i like him, he has a sort of humor" venom says out loud "venom" eddie tries to stop him from starting to embarrass him "don't worry i think you're kinda cool to venom" you say with a laugh "your lips look really nice can i cum on them" he blurts out unexpectedly "well that's enough talking from you v" eddie tries to get venom back inside his body but he takes over instead.
"well i mean if you want to but im not against it" you smile to show off your lips more the symbiote "when eddie told me about you i thought i wasn't going to like you but now that you're here i want to do so many things" he says and eddie already knows what this is going to turn to so he tries to stop him but venom is just to strong, staying in control for just a little longer.
"oh pray tell more" you scoot closer to him "well i want to eat your delicious looking ass, i want to fuck you till you cant think, i want to cum all over your pretty face, and i want to make you my boyfriend" he says all in one breath with a complete smile through it all "well we could do some of those things today" you say getting on his lap.
who would've thought you'd be so open to getting fucked by an alien but hey who am i to judge (you people would let a fox fuck you aka nick wilde but hey i would too) you're quick to start making out with him, his long tongue exploring your mouth and making it's way down your throat, he was surprised to see you had no gag reflex which had his mind running.
eddie watched from inside as you lubed up venom fat cock with your saliva and slide all nineteen inches into you "haha i told you the human could fit me eddie" venom cheers as you bounce up and down on his long shaft, an obvious belly bulge poking out from your stomach and sort of in your chest, but venom still knew you were a puny human so he took it slow with you.
letting you rock your hips back and forth of his cock until he could feel himself cumming, and listening to your moan about how you love venoms' big dick so much had him aching to fill your pretty ass up but the things is, is this safe like symbiotes can cum a lot and like i mean A LOT so like will this hurt you?
meh i guess there's only one way to find out, unloading his pent up cum into your stretched ass that was unable to hold his cum in you for to long before it was spilling out, you looked a little out of it but you were a live so that counts for something "now how about we try that other thing" you ask with a weak grin on your face.
venom flipping you over and shoving his long tongue down your hole to lick the excess cum out while you cleaned` him up down below, lick the cum from his fat balls and making sure his cock was all nice and shiny, eddie just had to watch as you slutted yourself out to the alien but he's not gonna lie he was kinda turned on by it all.
"can we keep him eddie" venom asks still face deep in your ass "id love to stay plus i cant really walk so" you chuckle and for some reason just hearing you laugh made venoms cock throb, he doesn't know why but maybe it's a sign to go again
taglist:@mailmango @spermeboy @ghostking4m @gayaristocrat @addictedtomalepits @staarb0y @crispysoup318 @its-ares @gargoylesworld09 @znerac
#venom#venom x reader#venom x male reader#x male reader#x male y/n#gay smut#x male smut#gay#x male#male reader#bottom male reader#venom symbiote#venom x you#eddie brock#veddie#eddie brock x reader#eddie brock imagine#eddie brock x you#eddie brock x venom
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DISTRACTION — TOP MALE READER X DRACULE MIHAWK
synopsis. mihawk's having a shitty day, and frankly, he needs you to comfort him. perhaps you could give him a . . . distraction of some sort. wc. 2.3k
tags. needy! power bttm! mihawk, service top! reader, food play (concerning wine), fingering, anal sex, cumming untouched, slight praise kink
“I am not your father, nor will I ever be.”
What had started as a simple joke had escalated into a topic of matter with a depth that none of them—Zoro or Perona—could fathom. After Mihawk spit out those damaging words and strode off to his private quarters, the two had sat in silence for the remainder of their dinnertime, before Zoro had gotten up and said he wanted to train some more, and Perona said she needed her beauty sleep.
They were excuses. Distractions. Because it had hurt, and none of them could figure out why—the belated realisation that perhaps Mihawk did not associate them with familiarity, did not acknowledge their presence as a part of his life. They were strangers, still. Strangers who had spent every day for two years together in an abandoned castle.
The sharp knocking on your door of your study had caught your attention, and you frowned. Your husband wasn’t one for such an impatient feat, and rarely would Perona or Zoro come to you for something.
You unlocked the door.
“Who is—oh.” A pleasant surprise, and you allowed yourself to relish in the slightly dishevelled appearance of Mihawk without his plumed hat, his piercing golden eyes a little more tired than usual. You grinned. “Hey.”
“Y/n,” he said, rather stiffly. “I would… like a diversion tonight.”
You stilled.
A diversion. Were you misinterpreting his words? Was this his way of propositioning you? Him, really? Dracule Mihawk?
“Did you train too hard with Zoro today, love?” You laughed, but you didn’t miss the way his expression hardened at the mention of the other swordsman.
“No. If that is too much to ask for, then I will take my leave.”
“Wait.” You gently wrapped a hand around his wrist, tugging him back to you. “I’m sorry for laughing. And if… a diversion is what you want, then I suppose I can’t afford to disappoint my husband, mm?”
Your hands slid to his waist, pulling him into the room before closing and locking the door behind you. You knew something was on his mind—the way he would suddenly seem distant, eyebrows furrowing, his grip on your shoulders turning rigid as you kissed him languidly, trying your best to distract him from whatever.
Mihawk pulled back, somewhat breathless, and gave a single tug on your shirt. You bit back a smile at his casual display of need, taking the hint to undress yourself, but afterwards immediately surging back to continue the kiss, helping him remove his coat. He was way more touchy than usual today, one hand cupping the back of your neck to deepen the kiss while the other rested tenderly on your bicep, securing your hold on him.
Before long, the two of you had ended up on the made bed with him sprawled beneath you, naked and pretty despite having solid strength embedded into his very being. As your hands slowly kneaded his thighs to get him to relax, his golden eyes scrutinised your every move, still unused to showing vulnerability after all those years.
“I suppose you don’t want to talk about it.”
“No. I do not.”
“Does it concern the children?”
“Do not speak of them as if they were your own.”
Ah. So that was what it was about.
You pressed a lubed finger to his entrance, easing one in. You decided you wanted to rile him up. “They’re not my children, naturally. But they might as well be yours.”
Mihawk’s eyes had widened a fraction, almost in anger, but then you had pressed your finger directly into his prostate, and he had shuddered with a sharp hiss of your name, all words lost. You continued to lazily rub the spot you knew too well after years of practice, watching as he bit his lip to stop the small breathy moans from spilling out.
“Y’know what, love? I have the perfect thing for this occasion.” You pulled out your finger, and his gaze had immediately snapped to yours with a deep frown, silently questioning why.
“I do not wish to indulge in any of your shenanigans—”
You reached into the cupboard to pull out a bottle of fine wine, one you had made yourself since your stay at Kuraigana Island. “You were saying?”
Mihawk cleared his throat, looking away. “I will indulge you this once.”
You grinned triumphantly, settling back between his spread thighs and shamelessly staring at his hard-on, which rested on his stomach with a pretty flush. You pressed one finger back into him carefully, adding one more for the stretch before popping open the cork, taking a swig of the wine as the smallest sip drenched your mouth with a taste so bitter and divine.
Distracted, you hadn’t realised when Mihawk had begun rolling his hips back against your fingers, wanting to take it deeper, but his ego forbade him from asking.
“Patience, darling,” you muttered, curling your fingers and enjoying the way his breath stuttered.
“I’m ready. Put it in.”
You chuckled at his stubbornness, knowing he was nowhere near ready before taking another drink and leaning down to capture his lips. Mihawk parted them without much thought—a result of conditioning over the years, maybe, and the wine trickled from your tongue into his mouth.
He made a little noise of surprise before swallowing harshly, tongue lightly pressing against yours, subtly asking for more. You allowed it, letting him explore you as he wished, but keeping the pace slow and languorous as your fingers continued to scissor and stretch him open.
Mihawk looked dazed when you finally parted, a light blush riding high on his cheekbones, his lips red and kiss-bitten.
“How is it?”
“Horrible,” he muttered, and his tongue briefly darted out to lick the corner of his mouth, as though he wanted to chase the aftertaste.
“You seem to like it enough.”
His bottom lip pressed up, and if you didn’t know your husband any better you would have thought he was sulking. You shared another wine-drenched kiss, adding a third finger before he started to get impatient, wrenching his mouth away from yours.
He grabbed your wrist. “Put it in,” he demanded breathily.
“Aye, sir,” you teased, slathering your length with lube before lining up and pushing inside.
Mihawk had made a noise between a gasp and a mewl, fingers fisting into the bed sheets as he looked up at you with half-lidded eyes. His hole stretched deliciously tight around your cock, warm and wet with the squelch of lube, and you stifled a groan, stopping to let him get adjusted to the size.
What you didn’t expect was how strong legs suddenly locked around your waist, forcing you all the way in in one go. “Mihawk—!” White hot pleasure surged up your spine as your knees trembled from how hard you were trying not to hold back and not blindly thrust into him.
“Be quiet,” he rasped, and you looked down to see him with his head thrown back to bare his pretty neck, body trembling in an arch, face flushed and heaving with breath. No matter how many times you had done this before, it was always a sight to see the Greatest Swordsman in the World being reduced to a debauched mess at your touch.
You felt a smug grin creep onto your face. “Too much?”
“No. Move.”
“Fine with me.” Throwing his legs over your shoulder, you rammed back into tight heat, making him throw out his arms for balance with a yelp.
“Reckless, hn, as ever—”
“That’s why you married me, love.” The soles of his feet dug into your neck as you set a punishing pace, driving little noises out of him as you railed him into the mattress. "Playing safe is rather boring, don't you think?"
He narrowed his gaze with disapproval, but made no further comment, only able to suck in quiet shaky breaths to keep up with you.
And yes, this was good, but it wasn’t enough. Didn’t feel like real sex. You wanted to hear more.
You stopped all of a sudden, and Mihawk let out a frustrated growl, his hips bucking back against your cock as though trying to fuck himself on it. Pressing a hand on his stomach to force him to stay put, you retrieved the wine bottle from the nightstand and poured it all over his chest, the liquid messily splashing onto skin.
“What are you—!”
You leaned down to take a nipple into your mouth, lips wrapping around it to suck hard while your tongue licked up the sweet, puckery wine. At the same time, you started to grind your hips against him, the blunt head of your cock massaging places inside him that sent stars clouding at the edges of his vision. Mihawk tightened around you, letting out a whine—an actual, unrestrained one.
It was music to your ears.
You continued to lick and suck at his chest until every single drop of wine had been cleaned from him, and he had fisted a hand into your hair, grasping at the strands painfully, whether trying to press harder or pull you away—you couldn’t tell.
“Haah, that’s enough!”
“So pretty,” you murmured, ignoring him as you bit into his chest, making him cry out. “No one’s seen you like this before.”
“I’ll slit your throat, y/n.”
You simply smirked. “Did I ever tell you that dishing out death threats in the middle of sex is a huge turn on for me?”
“Not threats. They're promises if you keep this up.”
“Alright, fine.” You reeled back only to start fucking your cock into him again, head turning to kiss at his sensitive inner thigh hooked over your shoulder. It started off with lazy grinding, until you started to angle your hips to hit a mouth-watering spot inside him, harder, faster, better.
Mihawk glared at you weakly as he endured your thrusts, letting out breathy whines as you took and took and took from him, every piece of the wall he had built around himself slowly crumbling down to nothing.
You started to pound into him even harder, arms wrapping around his thighs to thrust his hole back against you, the filthy, loud slapping of skin against skin echoing in the room. Mihawk had seized up with a choked whine all of a sudden, eyes wide as he realised that the kids might hear, but you ignored him, knowing far too well that Zoro and Perona were at the other side of the castle and in their respective rooms.
“They won’t hear. Now louder.”
Mihawk only shook his head weakly, knowing that only moans and other desperate noises would come out if he opened his mouth to answer. He was barely able to focus on you now, his eyes blinking half-open and closing, mind-blown with pleasure.
“You asked for a diversion. I’m giving you one, but not without payment,” you mumbled. “So let me hear you, love.”
This was enough to make his lips part, and you drove forward to nail directly into his prostate, making him whine your name, wrecked.
“More,” you gasped, drinking in the noise. “I want more.”
“Touch—touch me.”
“No. Want you to cum on my cock only. Can you do that? Please?”
Mihawk only gritted his teeth together, otherwise too tired to fight your demands, and the alcohol—although only a few sips—was getting to his head, making him looser, less defiant. He was now panting openly into the air, almost drooling, too fucked out to stifle his moans or straighten his lewd expression, only able to lie there and take it, the distraction that he had asked for.
You were getting close, and by the way his hole spasmed around you with every thrust, you knew he had already been a long time ago.
Leaning forward to almost bend him in half, you mindlessly muttered praises into his ear, “So fucking good, gorgeous, you’re so strong, so good f’me—”
That did the trick, and then he was cumming and falling apart in your arms, back pulled taut like a string and eyes rolling back with a rare shout of your name. His hole tightened around you like a vice, making your hips stutter to a sudden stop. You choked on a moan, pivoting your hips to drive against his prostate one last time before blinding white utterly consumed your vision.
When you came to be, you had collapsed on top of him, no longer inside, and it took a hand carding through your hair to pull you back to reality. It was dirty, with ropes of cum smushed against your cheek and sweat clinging on to every inch of your bodies, but Mihawk was there, his heart beating warm and alive underneath you, and it felt so right.
“Thank you,” you heard him whisper faintly.
You stopped his hand, bringing it to your lips to press a kiss to the ring there. “You don’t have to thank me for anything. I didn’t do it out of obligation.”
“I know.”
You hummed. “And I understand that maybe you aren’t ready to recognise that you have become… some sort of parental figure to them,” you breathed, choosing your words carefully, “but I do wish that you could see how much they value and trust in you.”
“I know,” he repeated. And then a more quiet, “They’re yours, too.”
Oh.
You raised your head to look at him in question, only to find him facing the side, pink dusted on his cheeks.
“I… am inebriated. You are taking advantage of an inebriated man.”
“I didn’t even say anything!” you protested.
Laughing at his embarrassment, you leaned down to press a kiss to his lips, finding a taste not even the sweetest of wines could replicate seeping into your body, of finely-aged love. masterlist! # getting his characterisation right was the hard part. @/anon who wanted a needy mihawk, hope this suffices <3
#✧ blood of reptile.#top male reader#dom male reader#mihawk x male reader#dracule mihawk x male reader#dracule mihawk x reader#mihawk x reader#one piece#one piece x reader#one piece x male reader#top reader#dom reader#male reader#x male reader#bottom character#dracule mihawk#bottom male character#one piece smut#sub one piece#no beta we die like ace
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Could I request the Itoshi brothers and Bachira with a ballerina reader?
“You can’t possibly be serious.”
Rin didn’t know a lot about relationship and girls, but he still knew when he said that, he crossed a line.
“Oh really.” [Y/N] snapped back at him. Arms crossed across her chest. Glaring at him with that fiery determination Rin usually respected, but now was a little scared of. “So you admit you think my training is BS compared to your training?”
The two of them had been on very intense practice schedules as of late. Rin training up to prepare for his next match and move up, and [Y/N] training for their upcoming performance and hopefully be scouted for prima in a company. They were stressed out, fried, and exhausted. And what do exhausted people do when they are exhausted? Compare their exhaustion so they make sure that their complaints are justified as they are the only one, in the whole wide world, who could be this exhausted.
“I didn’t say it was ‘BS’. I’m just saying you can’t possibly compare what I have to do to what you have to do. The weight training. The cardio.”
“The stretching. The vaults.”
“The practice matches. The strategy management.”
“Learning every step in the performance, even if it isn’t yours, to memory. Being lifted almost 8 feet in the air and hoping your partner can hold so you don’t break your leg, or your neck.”
“The ice baths.”
“Pointe shoes.”
“Having to deal with Isagi!”
The couple growled at each other before [Y/N] finally snapped. “Fine! You think it’s so easy, you do it!”
“Fine!”
Rin would live to regret that.
The next day, to foolishly prove a point, Rin went through [Y/N]’s whole workout schedule with them. The stretching, the vaults, the practice, the lifts. He wouldn’t let himself be lifted, nor wear pointe shoes, but by the end of the day his body hurt in new ways he didn’t even know were possible. “Still think it’s so easy?”
Rin looked up from the floor he was laying on up at [Y/N]. “Fine. I take it back.”
She smiled and knelt down beside him. “Well, I appreciate that. People think because ballet is all pretty costumes and fluid movements that it’s calm & easy. They don’t appreciate the work that goes into it.”
“I’m sorry.” He realized he was doing that. Belittling their hard work.
Rin sat up and took a sip out of his water bottle. “Are you going to do my training tomorrow then?”
“Sure. What’s fair is fair.” She agreed. “But no weights. I can’t bulk up anymore of Madam Costume Maker will murder me.”
Rin scoffed. “We’ll just do an easy day for you then. If you can’t handle it.”
She punched him in the shoulder, but Rin was too tired to even feel it.
One thing that people don’t tell you when you become a professional athlete is that it’s not just about the games anymore. It’s the press.
Sae sighed as he came back to his hotel room. Completely drained from having to deal with people all day and answer their silly questions. He just wanted to play football. Why did he have to tell everyone about his fitness strategy or what brand of saltines he liked?
As he was taking off his coat his phone rang and Sae answered it. “Hello.”
“Thank you for the flowers.”
A small smile tugged at Sae’s lips as he heard [Y/N]’s voice. “Of course.” With his game coming up, he was not in town for [Y/N]’s opening night. He felt bad about it, which was strange, but being professionals in their art sometimes they had to make sacrifices. That didn’t mean he couldn’t make an effort. “How was the show?”
“Good. Early critic reviews seem to be positive.” Of course they were with [Y/N] as the prima. “I wish you could have seen it.”
“I will.” Sae explains that he paid someone to film their performance. He had gotten special permission and everything from the company; with a hefty donation. “I’ll watch it later.”
“You sound tired.”
“I am.” He confessed.
“Poor baby,” [Y/N] cooed. Even though she was the one that went through the grueling physicality of dancing, she still seemed more concerned for him. “Why don’t you take a hot bath and get some sleep then?”
“They don’t believe in baths here.” Or at least his hotel room didn’t.
“A shower then. I’ll see you next week?”
“Of course.”
Sae hung up the phone and sighed again. Still tired, but a little refreshed from talking to [Y/N].
He showered and went to bed as suggested. Getting a goodnight sleep for another press tour tomorrow before the game. When he woke up that morning there was a knock at his door and a delivery from room service. A hearty breakfast of an egg white omelet, fresh fruit, and salty seaweed tea. The kind of breakfast he needed but would never get for himself. After accepting delivery, Sae noticed a card on the silver tray and quickly read it.
:Do your best: was all it said, but Sae knew who it was from.
He sat in his hotel room and ate his breakfast in silence. Watching [Y/N]’s performance on TV. Just because they had to make sacrifices didn’t mean that they couldn’t make the effort.
Bachira had been obsessed with ballerina’s ever since his mother took him to see a show once at Christmas.
The bright costumes. The spins. The music. It always excited him.
Dating [Y/N] was almost like being in the show. Helping them with their choro. Coming to rehearsals to see them practice. Bachira had probably seen the show a hundred times before actually opening night, and yet he was as nervous & excited as the actual dancers.
“You’re going to do great [Y/N]-chan~!” He whispered to her backstage.
“I don’t know…it’s a much bigger crowd than I expected….”
“That’s ok.” Bachira told her. “They’re all just faceless blobs in a crowd. Don’t focus on anyone but me in the first row. Unless…I get removed for cheering too loud. That’s gonna be hard for more….”
[Y/N] chuckled, then kissed Bachira’s cheek. “Thank you. I wouldn’t have made it this far without your support.” The music changed, coming up on [Y/N]’s cue, and they get into position to dance out. “Don’t get kicked out.”
“I’ll try~!” Bachira promised, then went to his seat to watch the performance from the audience. In awe & rapture of the beauty of the show and his partner.
#;ask and ye shall receive (request answers)#blue lock#blue lock scenarios#blue lock imagines#itoshi sae#sae itoshi#sae x reader#sae x you#sae itoshi x reader#sae itoshi x you#itoshi sae x reader#bllk#bllk x reader#bllk x you#bllk scenarios#bllk imagines#bllk sae#rin itoshi#itoshi rin#itoshi rin x reader#rin itoshi x reader#blue lock manga#blue lock x reader#blue lock x reader smut#bllk manga#blue lock x you#bachira meguru#bachira meguru x reader#bachira meguru x you#bllk bachira
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Could you store something with jun-hee (player 222) x f!reader plz🙏
Nothing's Gonna Hurt You Baby
summary - it may sound a bit cliché, but you were in love with your best friend. even though you always wanted to tell her, you strongly doubted that she could use your love - you didn't know that she thought the same. you two were really stupid, huh?
pairing: kim jun-hee x fem. reader
word count: 1.1k
contains: wlw, angst w/ comfort, arguing, fluff, pre squid game au, hidden feelings
a/n: i went to a cas concert a few months ago and it was insane. this was the song that just stuck with me since then and i thought about her when i listened to it again after watching the show! hope u like it ;p
"Oh man, they forgot our spring rolls." you realized disappointed after you went through each package of food one by one until there was nothing left but napkins in the bag. You looked at your best friend as you said. "Should I go to the store and get them? I know how much you like them, and I think the owner likes me, who knows, maybe we'll get an extra portion or something, huh?"
Jun-hee just shook her head with a gentle smile on her face. "That's all right. I want to eat with you and by the time you come back, the food will be all cold and mushy." she said, reaching for the chopsticks after opening her box of fried noodles.
You sat down on the opposite chair of your little dining table in your small kitchen. "I guess, I can't argue with that." you gave in and reached for a spoon to mix your fried rice a little.
You had turned on the radio a while ago and the music it was playing accompanied the pleasant silence between the two of you. You could hardly stop yourself from thinking about how homely this all felt right now with her, as you often did in the last few days. It was sudden and you were definitely caught off guard when Jun-hee suddenly appeared at your doorstep with a packed bag in tow. You didn't know exactly what happened, but you didn't need to because you could imagine that it probably had something to do with her parents or something - it didn't matter. She would tell you when she was ready.
"I heard that this one popular show is getting a second season soon, you know..." you started to tell her and then tried to think of the title when you suddenly heard a soft howl. You immediately stood up when you saw Jun-hee sitting huddled up with her arms covering her face. "Hey, what's wrong..." you asked worriedly, not used to such an emotional reaction from her since she was usually such a collected person. This was a very rare occurrence.
She interrupted you before you could say anything else. "I'm pregnant!" she cried out, feeling the lingering guilt inside her finally take over her entire mind as she uttered those words. A few minutes passed with you just holding her like that and Jun-hee clung tightly to you, sobbing. She was worried that you might let her go - in fact, she expected you to, which is why she didn't tell you for so long.
I can't blame her for anything, I really am the worst. She thought to herself when she still couldn't bring herself to let go. No matter how selfish it might be of her.
"Is it from that Mingyu guy?" you finally asked her and she nodded vaguely, but it was enough for you to understand. Jun-hee didn't even bother to correct you when you said his name wrong.
You just sighed and even if you didn't say it out loud, she could feel how angry you were with her - how disappointed. "You're mad at me," she stated while you continued to stroke her back reassuringly, even when the position you were holding her in was a little uncomfortable for you. "Of course I am, the guy's an asshole and you're only in your early twenties," you answered her honestly, comforting her with your own broken heart. "Does he even know? Last I heard, all his fans were sending him death threats because he stole their money or something."
She didn't even want to think about it. "He's not answering my calls and I have no idea where he is."
You let out another heavy sigh. "You're really stupid sweetie, I knew that guy was like this from the beginning, really," you spoke up before looking confusedly at Jun-hee after she lifted her head from your chest and met your gaze with a furrowed brow. "Can you stop rubbing it in my face? I already know that I fucked up!" she exclaimed, completely exhausted as she continued to rub her reddened eyes.
So she wants to keep the baby, her parents probably kicked her out as soon as they found out. You massaged your forehead, exhausted. "So, what now?" you just asked her, elaborating on your question when she looked at you with a confused look. You just wanted to kiss her right now and tell her that everything would be okay again and at the same time, you wanted to smash your head through a wall and cry. "What are you going to do now with a baby on the way? Do you have a plan for how you're going to look after it?"
I don't have a job or any money. I don't know what to do. She didn't answer you right away and just avoided your gaze, embarrassed, so you reached for her hand to get her attention. "If you don't know what to do and you want me to help you, then you have to tell me," you finally said and you were probably the stupid one this time.
Jun-hee looked at you in surprise and took a few seconds to really understand what you meant. "Are you sure? You don't have to do something like that for me..."
You interrupted her relatively quickly. "I want to do this for you because -" and your love confession was almost half hanging from your lips when you stopped yourself from saying it out loud in the last second. What am I doing? This is completely the wrong time for this. "- because you can always count on me, even if no one else does."
Oh, that's right. Jun-hee thought to herself as she held her pounding heart and smiled a little forcedly. I thought she was going to say something else, how stupid of me I mean you're pregnant with another man's child right now Jun-hee, wake up. She brought herself back down to earth. You already gave her more than enough. "Please, help me."
You spread your arms out again to catch her in a hug. "We'll work it out, don't worry..." you tried to reassure her further, any unspoken feelings remaining as you both made the decision to keep them a secret.
#x reader#x female y/n#x female reader#fanfiction#x fem!reader#squid game#squid game x reader#squid game fanfic#squid game 2#squid game season 2#squid game player 222#kim jun hee#wlw#lesbian#bisexual#lgbtq#squid game netflix#x you#squid game x you#fanfic#kim jun hee x reader#player 222 x reader
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Aelwyn is sixteen and preparing for midterms at Hudol. Uniform pressed and starched, head full of incantations and spell components. She doesn't mean to bump into Adaine and get orange juice all over her shirt but today isn't the day she's going to start showing weakness.
"You know, you really should watch we're you're going," she says archly, playing off the clumsy mistake as a purposeful jab.
Playing it off a bit too well because, the next thing she knows, Adaine is flipping her off and a bolt of queasy looking, green energy is coming towards her. Ray of Sickness. And she can't spare the spell slot for Counterspell because she needs it for her exams.
"You little bitch!" Aelwyn says once she's emptied the contents of her stomach down the front of her shirt.
"Good luck with your exams," Adaine says sweetly.
Aelwyn is eighteen and the oldest, mangiest cat she's ever seen in her life has just vomited on her shoes.
"My," she says, casting a shield spell around her ankles to stop the cat from clawing at them. "You weren't kidding. He is a little bastard, isn't he?"
The shelter volunteer looks mortified. "Oh, gods! I am so sorry. I tried to warn you--I mean, not that I'm blaming you but--"
"No, it's alright. I did ask you to show me stragglers."
The shelter worker gestures to another pen on the other side of the room. "I can show you the kittens we just got in or there are some very well behaved older cats as well if you'd--"
But Aelwyn cuts her off, scooping up the old cat--though she holds him at arm's length for now, just to be safe. "No need. I haven't changed my mind. I'll take this one." She looks at the tag on his collar. "Hector."
Aelwyn is three and, as of a month ago, no longer the youngest Abernant.
She's had baby dolls in the past but never a baby sister and this is exciting new territory. She's full of questions. When is she going to be able to walk? When is she going to be able to talk? When will she be old enough to have lembas bread instead of formula?
Her parents seem less fascinated by the new addition to the family than she is but her mother is amused when she slaps away the hand of a colleague of her father's who tried to touch Adaine before sanitizing his hands, standing between the much larger man and her sister.
"So defensive. Perhaps she'll be an abjurer."
When Aelwyn asks what that is, her mother says that it's a kind of magical protector and she likes that a lot. That sounds like a good thing to be.
At night, Adaine cries. Except, she doesn't hear it because the mobile above her crib is etched with runes that cast the Silence spell.
"But what if she gets hurt?" Aelwyn asks.
Her father brushes her off. That's what the Unseen Servants are for. But she thinks that's what an abjurer might be for too and even though she isn't one yet, that doesn't mean she can't start practicing.
So, every night, Aelwyn waits until her parents have put Adaine down for bed and then tiptoes into her room. She checks to see if Adaine is silently wailing and if she is (and even sometimes if she isn't) she presses her face between the bars of the crib and sticks her little hand over Adaine's face.
"Don't cry," she says, even though the Silence spell mutes her words as completely as the tears. "Mum said I'm an abjurer. Nothing will get you. Don't cry, baby."
Adaine grabs her hand with impressive grip strength for something so small and, within a few minutes, she's trancing peacefully.
Aelwyn is seventeen and her sister is off to save the world again. This time from a Night Yorb--whatever that is.
It feels cruel that Adaine should have to go risk her life again so soon after she just almost died--not almost died, she did die before being raised by her cleric.
She wants to come with, to help in some way. Surely she could be helpful--last quest they brought Gilear for Helio's sake!
But Adaine doesn't ask her and she can't bring herself to say the words she needs to have the conversation she wants. So, instead, she lightly whaps Adaine on the shoulder with her spellbook as she's packing for the quest.
"I know you haven't done much studying lately what with your grades being based on how many hobgoblins you kill or whatever ridiculous system Aguefort has cooked up," Adaine rolls her eyes at that, "But if you don't mind a little cram session before you leave tomorrow, I can show you how to cast Teleport like I said. Might help you stay a touch less dead on your quest."
Her tone is light but her eyes betray her: Please, please, please don't die again.
Adaine's expression softens but then she scoffs, playing her half of their game. "I don't know what a Hudol dropout who's been in jail for the past year is gonna teach me but do your best."
Aelwyn is seven and her father is cross with her.
"Really Aelwyn," he says and even though they're talking via crystal she can feel the frost of his glare. "You thought it was appropriate to call me at work for no good reason? How many times have I told you and your sister to not bother me while I'm working."
She hates the word bother. She doesn't want to be a bother. She tries very hard not to be. Maybe she just didn't explain herself well enough.
"I know, father. But Addy got really scared and panicky on the playground. She was breathing really hard and--"
Her father makes a noise of disgust. "I don't have time for this. She is in primary school now. Stop coddling her. And her name is Adaine, not Addy. Please speak properly. I'm raising you better than that."
He hangs up before she can say anything else.
Aelwyn is eighteen and most of the claw marks on her arms have healed, which is nice. On her lap asleep is Hector who has apparently decided he likes her enough to use her as a radiator but not enough to submit to medical treatment without using her arms as a scratching post.
"You little heat vampire," she says as she slides her thumb across the screen of her crystal, searching for a video that will help her out. Eventually she finds one that looks promising and she calls it up.
On the screen, a halfling is standing next to a cat who is actively shredding her sweater with its claws. "You're going to be tempted to use some kind of a shield spell when applying the ointment," says the halfling. "But cats can smell abjuration magic and they don't love it. You won't get close enough to do the job. Isn't that right my darling?"
In response, her cat hacks up a hairball.
"Darling indeed," she says under her breath.
But even laced with sarcasm, the word is sweeter against her tongue than she anticipated.
She sinks her hand into Hector's fur and scratches his back for a few moments before tentatively speaking aloud. "Sleeping well, my darling?"
Hector says nothing--he's asleep and a cat. But warmth blooms in Aelwyn's chest--more than enough to make up for what Hector is leeching from her.
Aelwyn is seventeen and her father has just given her the most horrible command she's ever received in her life--and she's counting being made to sink a ship full of people in that calculation.
She knows her father doesn't expect her to delicately extricate the knowledge he needs from Adaine's mind. He expects her to get it at all costs. To ransack and pillage the memories if necessary with no heed of the consequences on her psyche. He'd probably prefer it that way--the more broken Adaine is, the easier it will be to mold her into a version of herself that is more useful to him.
Aelwyn is usually a smooth talker and a convincing liar but now, she stumbles all over her words, babbling out a stream of deflections and pleas as her heart squeezes tighter and tighter in her chest until she can't hold back the truth that she's been suppressing for years anymore.
"Adaine's just…she's a baby."
Aelwyn is eighteen and her apartment is full of cats.
She's always thought that the phrase, "One thing led to another" was a bit of a cop out--clearly there were key steps between point A and point B being glossed over--but in this case, there is truly no better way for her to articulate how she went from zero cats to ten cats in such a short amount of time.
She's sure that if she was still living with Jawbone, he'd have something to say about it but that's exactly why she isn't currently living with Jawbone.
She portions out food for all of the cats, saving Hector for last because he likes to eat curled up next to her.
"My darling baby boy," she says, lifting him onto the couch with her because the jump up is a bit much for him and his old bones. She kisses him on the top of the head and then pulls out her crystal. She scrolls mindlessly for a bit before checking her messages despite the fact that there's conspicuously no notifications.
Not that she has many people to expect texts from but she hasn't heard from Adaine in a few weeks and it's unsettling. When they weren't getting along, they were still living under the same roof. She was able to keep tabs on her, more or less. Now, they're closer than they've been in ages but barely talking.
I'm the older sister, I suppose, Aelwyn thinks. I should take the initiative.
She pets Hector with one hand and drafts a message with another: Are you alive, bitch?
She's about to press send but then she frowns and deletes the draft. After a few moments of thought, she taps out a new message: Can't believe I'm gonna say this. Miss my little sister. Everything all right?
Aelwyn is seventeen--though she doesn't feel like it.
Her mind is telling her that she's sixteen and that she was just been broken out of a jail cell in Solace but Adaine is telling her that she's just been broken out of an entirely different prison after being tortured for months even though she doesn't remember any of that.
But her body feels frail and Adaine says she's been in her mind which means she must have used the hard reset.
She's suddenly feeling very vulnerable--not because of the disorientation or the of the levels of exhaustion she can feel weighing on her like leaden chains. No, it's because of the fact that Adaine using the reset means that she must have read the treacle-y note that she left there for her to find.
It was just an insurance policy, she tells herself. There was wisdom to buttering up your savior to make sure she'd do what you needed her to do.
She manages to mostly believe it. But the small, truthful part of herself that knows how deeply she meant the words is so uncomfortable that she antagonizes Adaine until she's annoyed enough to hit her with a spell, sending her into blissful unconsciousness.
Aelwyn is nineteen and she's going to kill her mother.
Well, not alone of course. Adaine deserves the kill at least as much as she does if not more. It'll be a group effort.
It's a strange mix--the cold fury at her mother mixed with the warmth she feels for her sister, sitting across the table from her. She summons a flame to her palm, a preview of what their mother has waiting for her. She watches Adaine's eyes harden with resolve and she sees the face of her baby sister, left to wail alone silently for hours, soothed by her presence. "Let's get her."
"Yes, my dear," she says, the endearment coming freely as if this has always been their dynamic. "We'll get her."
But there will be time for that later. Right now, it's time for ice cream and seeing Adaine so content in such a simple pleasure causes the warmth in her to surge so suddenly that it would be startling if it wasn't so pleasant. The urge to voice it is so powerful that she doesn't know that would have been able to stop it at any point in life, let alone now.
"I hope we get to eat ice cream and cast magic forever," she says, words that would have been impossible for her to say one short year ago and impossible not to say now.
And, to her delight, Adaine agrees.
#fantasy high#fantasy high spoilers#dimension 20#d20#spoilers#aelwyn abernant#adaine abernant#i wrote this for two reasons#the first reason is that I'm obsessed w/ how verbally affectionate aelwyn became in jy and I wanted to explore that#the second is that tumblr user catartac wanted more cats in a previous meta/fic I wrote about aelwyn and she was so valid#it didn't fit in the last one so I put it here#i watched a video about how much vocabulary three years olds have for this lol#abernant sisters#edit: i tweaked a bit in the last section bc i was reminded during clip watching today that it's actually aelwyn who summons a fireball#in the middle of basrar's lmao#whoops#honestly should have remembered#aelwyn is nice now but she's still a drama queen
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How would the batfamily react if they found out that the singer/influencer reader was dating one of the villains?, imagine the reader has friends with benefits from the villains
(What kind of jokes do you like?)
Batman is so scary, even bullets are afraid to hit him. That's why they aimed for his parents. (sorry)
anon 🦌
Note: 🦌anon please send more jokes. After the Solmare announcement regarding the Obey me series, I am one push away from drinking every wine in my fridge.I’m gonna need more jokes (˃̣̣̥ᯅ˂̣̣̥) I don't give permission to have my fics posted to other sites, copied, or fed to AI. Thank you.
Masterlist
divider by: @strangergraphics-archive and @strangergraphics. Please do support them ♡
You heard that? That’s the collective sign of every Batfamily member sighing in disappointment and collective glare towards Bruce. Like father like child, of all genes to be inherit you inherited his taste (ಠ_ಠ). Getting entangled with a villain is not something new in the Batfamily because they are either related to one (Cassandra, Stephanie, Damian) or romantically involved with one (Bruce with Talia, Poison Ivy, Catwoman and sometimes Harley. Dick with Catwoman II. And Jason with… you know what let’s not talk about Talia and Jason. That one is weird on all levels).
If you’re romantically involved with someone who does not know Batman’s real identity then it’s not much of a problem. The family is just going to visit said enemy and scar them for the rest of their mortal life. It will be so bad they will just quit being a villain and leave Gotham all together. If you’re romantically involved with someone who knows Batman’s real identity, then it will be a chaotic event. Bruce is already fighting villains and now he’s fighting his blood pressure too.
Riddler would be so smug about it. He would rub it in every Batfamily member’s face and would constantly drop your name in fights like ‘How would they react if you hurt me?’ or ‘Oh they will be mad if I come back bruised!’. Riddler would be so insufferable like the madman he is. If you’re dating Harvey Dent, you’re technically dating two persons (in most media depictions, Harvey is the same age as Bruce so let’s go with that one). His incorruptible part is basically filling every space that Bruce neglected to fill. He’ll teach you about legals and laws, tell you stories about their days and he protects you from those who dare to come close. His corrupted part, Two face, is kind of mean. He will never miss the chance to remind you of the potential parental issues you have.
Headcanon that Harley will make it her mini mission to keep you away from Joker because let’s face it, Joker will not love you. He will only use you and break you like how he did to Harley.
Honestly, it doesn’t matter if the relationship you have is good or bad. To the family it’s a parasite that needs to be terminated immediately before it grows. You’re grounded. You’re not allowed to go out alone. If you don’t live in the estate anymore, you will just randomly find your apartment sold to someone else and you’ll be taken back to the estate. No metahumans in Gotham rule but Damian already has the permission from Bruce to have the Titans stay for a while as reinforcements. Even Jason is patrolling more and everyday now he will make a report to the estate.
During those days they were full on babying you to the point of infantilization. They’ll give you ‘the talk’ especially if you’re in a friends with benefits relationship with a villain and sometimes they’ll go so far into showing you every other person they had been with. They are not above poisoning the relationship too. They’ll show you expertly doctored photos showing their ‘infidelity’. Guilt trip you into reading old cases and gaslight you. You’re not in love with them, you were just manipulated into thinking that you are.
But of course, what is a Wayne if not stubborn? Month of being grounded and being in heavy watch and you’re done. You already have their shifts memorized down to who checks on you at night. After hours once you’re certain that everyone is now asleep or busy on their patrols (or finished checking your room), you start acting out the plan of running away. You passed each security detail without triggering them, passed every room without alerting anyone, and passed Titus without waking him up. However before you can even reached the doorknob, you heard Dick and Jason behind you:
“Looks like someone took lessons from Catwoman”
“You know we saw your lover today. We were going to let them go but I guess no one’s picking you up anymore”
The next time you wake up, you are greeted by the fresh warm breeze and the sound of water hitting the shore. As you descended down the stairs, news about a villain going missing was on the headlines along with the date on the screen saying ‘Thursday’. It has been three days since you got caught by Jason and Dick and Tim just entered the door carrying take outs from Mad Yak cafe. You’re in Happy Harbor, far away from Gotham and your lover is missing. Was the no kill rule violated? You can only pray it’s not.
#yandere batfamily#batfam x reader#batfam x neglected reader#neglected reader#male reader#batfam x female reader#female reader#batfam x gender neutral reader#gender neutral reader#yandere dc#yandere jason todd#platonic yandere#yandere#yandere batfam#platonic batfamily#platonic dc#platonic batfam#platonic batman#platonic batfamily x reader#dc x reader#yandere bruce wayne#yandere damian wayne#yandere tim drake#yandere dick grayson#batfam imagine#batfam x you#batfam x batsis#batfam x batbro#batfam x male reader#neglectful batfam
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✩₊˚.⋆ YOU'RE FORGIVEN ! - hawks/keigo takami / 10.10 / kinktober
CW: he's sexually frustrated ofc, oral sex (he receives), tiny argument for plot, snowballing kiss, she/her used, not anatomy specified when it comes to reader, petname used ("pretty"), thats all :)
Word Count: 2.2k
Author's Note: hi guys! i forgot what number kinktober post this is...lol. i think it's the 6th but anyways, i hope you enjoy reading! ily guys and appreciate the love <3. leave a like or reblog to show support.
hawks had been in a sour mood lately. he wasn’t the type to lash out or act cold, especially not toward y/n. usually, he was all smirks and feathered winks, always pulling her close, teasing her with that warm, cocky charm. but for the past few days, he’d been distant, barely speaking, his touch cold and detached. it felt like she was sharing space with a stranger instead of the man she loved.
being the number 2 hero weighed on him, and she knew that much. the constant pressure, the relentless expectations—it had him on edge. but still, that didn’t make it any easier for her to watch him shut her out, day after day, without so much as an explanation.
one evening, y/n had finally had enough. she found him in the kitchen, leaning against the counter with his arms crossed, eyes focused on some distant point. she stormed over, her voice tense as she spat, “what the hell is your problem, keigo?”
his eyes narrowed, but he didn’t answer. that only made her blood boil more. “seriously, this is getting old. if you’ve got something to say, then say it. stop acting like a complete jerk.”
he finally met her gaze, his eyes hard and unrecognizable. “maybe you should just leave it alone. i’m dealing with a lot of crap that you wouldn’t understand.”
she let out a humorless laugh, shaking her head. “oh, so that’s it? you just get to walk around, treating me like crap, and i’m supposed to act like it’s fine? newsflash, kei, i’m not putting up with this. you’re not the only one who’s got things to deal with.”
they stood there, glaring at each other in silence, until he muttered something under his breath and stormed out, slamming the door behind him. the sound echoed through the empty space, leaving her standing there, fists clenched, anger and hurt simmering under her skin.
---
later that night, y/n heard the door creak open. she was still awake, curled up on the couch with her arms wrapped around her knees, staring into the dark. she didn’t look up as he walked in, but she could feel his presence fill the room, heavy with the weight of his regret.
hawks stepped closer, his movements slow and tentative, like he was afraid to get too close. when she finally glanced up, she saw his eyes, red-rimmed and glassy, like he’d been holding back tears. he hesitated, hovering a moment before sitting down beside her. he looked down, his hands fidgeting in his lap, as if he wasn’t sure he deserved to touch her. after a long silence, he let out a shaky breath, his voice barely more than a whisper. “i’m sorry,” he began, each word thick with emotion. “i shouldn’t have treated you that way. it’s just… it’s been rough. all this pressure, all these expectations, they’re eating away at me. but that doesn’t make it right. i took it out on you, and i hate that i did.”
he glanced over at her, his eyes searching hers, hoping for a sign that she could forgive him. slowly, he reached out, his hand closing gently around hers. “i don’t want you to think that’s who i am or who i want to be with you.” he moved closer, his gaze softening, filled with remorse. his other hand came up to brush a tear from her cheek, his touch so tender it nearly broke her heart. then, he leaned in, pressing his lips softly against hers.
the kiss was hesitant at first, a silent apology, his lips moving slowly, as though he feared she might pull away. but as he felt her respond, he deepened the kiss, his hands trembling as he held her close. he broke away just long enough to whisper, “i’m sorry,” the words spilling from him over and over again, a quiet mantra of regret and longing. “i’m so, so sorry…”
she felt the tension between them melt away, and her arms wrapped around him, pulling him closer. his lips found hers again, and the kiss grew more intense, a desperate attempt to bridge the distance that had come between them. his hands cradled her face, his thumbs tracing gentle circles along her skin, as if he was trying to memorize every detail, every curve.
he held her like he never wanted to let go, his touch tender but fierce, his kisses a blend of need and apology. with each soft, murmured “i’m sorry,” he poured out all the words he couldn’t seem to say, hoping she could feel how deeply he regretted the hurt he’d caused. and as they stayed there, wrapped up in each other, it felt like the pain was finally fading, leaving only the warmth of his embrace and the quiet promise that he would try to do better.
hawks pulled back just enough to look into her eyes, his breathing ragged, his gaze clouded with an intensity that was impossible to ignore. he cupped her face, his hands trembling slightly as he held her close, his voice a rough whisper laced with desperation.
“i need you, y/n,” he muttered, frustration thick in his tone. “god, you have no idea how much i missed you… your touch, your warmth. it’s been driving me crazy.” his hands slid down to grip her waist, pulling her flush against him, as if he couldn’t stand the thought of any space between them. “these past few days… i thought i could just push through it alone, but i can’t. i need you.”
his lips crashed against hers, the kiss rough and hungry, filled with the pent-up longing he’d tried so hard to ignore. his hands moved over her body, desperate to feel every inch of her, like he was trying to make up for all the time he’d lost. he kissed her with an urgency, almost frantic, his fingers pressing into her skin as if grounding himself, anchoring himself back to her.
“i’m sorry for shutting you out,” he whispered hoarsely between kisses, his voice thick with emotion. “i missed you so damn much, y/n. i don’t ever want to feel like that again, like i’m just drifting without you. you’re all i need.” his lips traveled down her neck, his touch rougher, more desperate, as if he was trying to make sure she understood just how badly he needed her.
“you have no idea what it’s like,” he said, voice strained, his words spilling out in a low, frustrated growl. “i can’t take it. i need you like this, close to me. i need you, now.” he pulled her back into another kiss, fierce and passionate, his hands exploring every curve of her body as if he was trying to imprint her into his memory. his touch was needy, almost frantic, like he was trying to make up for every second he’d spent apart from her, and he held her like he never wanted to let go again.
y/n pulled away, muttering something underneath her breath before pulling a string from his sweatpants, loosening the waistband. she pulled it down in one motion, his breifs coming down with it as well. his length was hardening with every second that passed, making him glance over to look at her. her hands gently gripped his erection and hawks let out a soft moan.
the arousal that was already leaking down his length gave her enough slip to begin slow stroking motions. "f-fuck. please don't tease, pretty. I've been waiting so long already." he muttered, his head leaning back against the couch. "i should for payback."
"i said that i was sorry."
y/n's grip around him tightened and her stroking movements sped up immediately. "don't do it again, kei." she frowned, a small pout on her lips. "i wont, pretty. i promise." his voice sounded strained. he was trying to speak properly, but y/n's hand alone was driving him insane.
it'd been well over a few weeks since he got anything close to this kind of affection with y/n, so now that he's gotten this despite it not being much, it was still enough for the time being. "can you use your mouth?" he asked, pleading eyes with dilated pupils staring directly at y/n. she held his gaze, in thought as she contemplated what to do.
"please? i wanna feel you."
"i'm still mad at you." she huffed before shifting in her seat. "i know, beautiful. I'll make it up to you i swear." hawks' voice sounded like pure vulnerability and so did his body language. he was tense in y/n's her hold, but he allowed the entirety of himself to remain on display for y/n’s eyes.
"promise?" she questioned. hawks knew that she was only trying to drag it out, but instead of calling it out, he remained 'oblivious'. "mhm." he nodded, another moan escaping from his throat.
y/n moved back just a bit before leaning down. her tongue ran a strip over the tip of his length. a shaky moan was heard from him and he bit down on his bottom lip when her lips wrapped around him completely, her hand still around the base. his breathing went in and out with sharp breaths through his nose and his hands wrapped around y/n's as he aided her to fit a pace more comfortable them both.
the sounds that filled the room was nothing short of lewd. y/n's occasional moans around his length, hawks trying to hold back, but the pleasure being overwhelming, and the quiet sounds of her gags when she'd take too much of his length in.
the saliva and arousal leaking down their hands and his painful erection. when hawks decided to take a glance at the sight after having his eyes shut tightly, he couldn't fight the shiver that ran through his body. "this is so pathetic." he groaned, feeling that familiar sensation approach.
y/n looked at him, a questioning look in her eyes. "close." was all he said with a look of embarrassment on his features. y/n was taken aback by this. her boyfriend was never the type to not be able to hold out for long periods of the time, so she could understand why he'd feel embarrassed about it now. "it's been so long that even if you stared at me long enough, i could probably get off too."
y/n attempted to hold back a laugh, but the vibration made hawks tighten his hand around y/n's, forcing her grip to be firm. "can you take more of me? just for a minute? you've done it before. " he pleaded. y/n pulled her mouth off of him, heavy pants falling from her breath. "you don't even deserve this much." she rolled her eyes, trying to ignore the small smirk on his lips.
"i'll do whatever you ask of me later, pretty."
"anything?"
"anything. i have all night."
with another wary look, she let out a huff. "okay, fine. jeez, i need to learn how to tell you no. you're so spoiled."
hawks leaned down, tilting her chin up and placing a kiss to her lips, a string of his arousal connecting them when he pulled back. "who's fault is that?" with a groan of annoyance, she leaned back down, taking him in whole. y/n shut her eyes, trying not to focus on the fact that the tip of his length met with the very back of her throat. hawks drew in a sharp breath, his breathing quickening in just seconds
"please dont stop." he moaned, hand gently cupping y/n's nape as she lifted her head before taking him in once again. the warmth of her mouth was all too familiar yet he couldn't get used to it even if he tried. y/n tightly shut her eyes when she gagged around his length and hawks felt a bit of pity for her but his selfishness didn't want her to stop. afterall, he was so close.
his climax approached when the tip of y/n's nose met his abdomen. she held that position for a few long seconds and in no time, his high rushed throughout his being. ribbons of white coated the inside of her mouth as she collected every drop of his arousal.
y/n stood up, holding the warm liquid behind her lips, watching as hawks's gaze fluttered open. "what is it?" he asked. y/n rolled her eyes since she couldn't talk. hawks squinted his eyes at her when she shifted to straddle his thighs. she pointed at his lips and then her own. "you want a kiss?" he lifted a brow.
she nodded and he was about to retaliate until y/n glared at him. he knew her all to well which is why he could almost curse himself when he remembered his words from earlier. he let out a long sigh. "anything." he muttered, rolling his eyes as he quoted himself.
"you better forgive me after this."
she rolled her eyes, a smile on her lips when she placed them against his. her lips parted and her tongue traced his. his arousal fell onto his own tongue and he wrapped her lips with his, the taste of his arousal coating his tongue. y/n let out a small laugh into his mouth before pulling back. "you're forgiven." she smiled, watching as he wiped his lips with the back of his hand.
"that was by far the most disgusting thing I've done." he muttered, reaching up to y/n to wipe away at the corner of her lips with his thumb. "guess that makes you a weirdo for enjoying it." she smiled, glancing down at his erection that was growing once again.
"fuck off."
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#hawks x reader#mha hawks#bnha hawks#hawks#hawks smut#hawks smau#takami keigo x reader#bnha keigo#mha takami keigo#keigo takami#keigo x reader#keigo tamaki#keigo takami x reader#keigo takami x y/n#keigo takami x you#keigo headcanons#hawks headcanons#hawks mha#anime smut#kinktober masterlist#kinktober prompts#kinktober 2024 masterlist#kintober 2024#2024 kinktober#kinktober 2024#mha#hawks my hero academia#boku no hero academia#mha keigo takami#mha keigo x reader
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Be warned. I wrote this at midnight. I have no clue what im talking about. Do you get it?
"Why doesn't this wolverine teach history? Other wolverine did"
Well, because THAT Wolverine had a Charles. Let me remind you just how fragile Logan's mental state is and just how quickly his brain can throw him into a temporary amnesia due to shock and / or panic that is triggered by his CPTSD.
The thing is, this Wolverine has a Wade. Not a Charles. Sure, Jean could probably do something to him if things got too crazy but you know just how dangerous of territory that would be. Yes, Charles doesn't have a healing factor but it was his confidence and perfect reassuring words that helped him, plus If something did happen Im pretty sure he wouldn't blame him much anyway. He knows what hes dealing with. This isnt to say that jean doesn't but I can see her panicking too much and Logan would feed off of that fear and panic and become worse.
Wade, on the other hand, is neither calm nor says the right things, BUT he can't die :D Which is a massive YES when it comes to dealing with a panicking 3+ time war veteran with knife hands. And is known to attack first ask later.
Trying to teach the kids about 'Nam, a thing sets him off. He stares off into space for a bit, Backs up and his breath gets heavy. The hairs on his arms are raised up and his pupils dilate, they widden and its as if he doesn't even remember he's a teacher.
When he starts the whole "Who are you? Where am I!?" Thing, a student (probably the oldest or one that's been dubbed most responsible) slowly just gets up and leaves to tell a trusted adult.
"Mrs. Munroe?"
"Yes?"
"Mr. Howlett is acting funny again."
"Okay darling. Go fetch Mr. Wilson for me? There's a dear."
She, calm as ever walks into the class room, standing away from the door so not to make him feel trapped, and very clearly shows her hands as she gestures the kids to leave.
Backing himself into a corner, he watches them one by one leave, Gripping at the chalk boards ledge and the windowsil, trying to balance and ground himself.
"Come now children. Quietly and slowly please. Good job. Go next door to Mrs. Summers please." Sending them to the next class room so to leave this one empty.
She stands off to the side of the room. Hands in front of her, smiling softly. "Hello Logan."
"What? Who are you?" He almost hisses but can't help but to feel not so threatened. He always did have a sweet spot for women. Maybe its their scent difference, but like most reactive animals, he's a little calmer for women. A little more trusting.
"Im a dear friend of yours. My name is Ororo. You are in no danger here." She states this practiced sentence with the same whisper of a voice.
"Where the fuck am I. How did I get here!? Did you bring me here!?" At this point he's growling.
"Logan, I assure you that no one forced you here. This is a school. You're a teacher."
"A teacher..?" Just a tad he softens, as if you had just told someone who wanted to be a vet when they grew up that they actually would become a very good vet, except the look in his eyes was as if questioning why they would ever him do that. Be a teacher I mean.
"Yes. If you would like to leave that is okay." She slowly sits in a spare chair, her leg crossing, not knowing how long she will need to play baby sitter but she hoped someone soon would alert the other staff of this. It IS a safety risk after all and Ororo knew that if he hurt anyone at all he'd immediately regret it terribly so when he woke.
"You.. you told her to go get someone. Why? Who are you getting? For what!?" Another snap, as if he thought she was trying to trick him into letting his gaurd down.
She smiles. "Your husband."
"What the fuck do you mean my 'husband'!? What are you sayin' lady!?" The venom in the way he says this makes her giggle a bit. Oh, goodness. He really did lose all of his memories, didn't he? How was the same man who once was so dastardly in love with scott to the point of shredding his heart into a gazillion pieces and is married to the silliest man alive, so internally homophobic? The irony of the thought made her laugh.
"And that kids is how you slice someone into sushi. Rice not included-" His weapons tatics and saftey class is interrupted.
"Mr. Wilson?"
"Oh hey, squirt! You wanna learn how to disconnect someone's joints without even leaving a puncture wound?"
"Maybe later.. uhm...Mr. Howlett's scared again..."
You just see Wade running out on these kids like "I'M COMING WOLVIE!"
"What, you think it's funny!? I ain't got a husband lady! Now, Im leaving! And there's nothing you can do to stop me!" He goes to walk out the door only to run into said husband, who immediately hugs him.
"Babe!! Hi! They told me- OUCH- okay yeah I deserved that- no tocuhy I forgot."
And is stabbed.
"What the fuck is wrong with you!? Get off me! Freak!"
"D'aawww!! Did you see that? He called me a freak! I hate to tell ya cupcake, but you're married to this freak. Now, what's wrOOW- Mad kitty are we? Woah there tiger! Easy boy!"
Logan looks at him, confused, stabs him again, and is trying to figure out why Wade's not dying. He goes to slash him in the head and wades like "WAITWAITWAIT NOT INFRONT OF THE KIDS-"
Mrs. Munroe, by now, has gotten up and left, closing the door and letting out a big sigh, wondering what shade of red they were going to paint the room this time.
She does a little clicky on her walkie and infroms all the staff about the situation and so for the next half hour or so, Logan's kids get to skip class and said classroom now needs a deep scrub.
And this ladies and gentlemen is why this Logan doesn't teach history anymore.
P.E. is SOOOO much easier on his mental status, and sometimes Wade joins, and he puts the whole class against him to make them work on their team building skills. Plus- it's funny to watch your husband get slapped in the head with 20 dodgeballs.
#deadpool and wolverine#poolverine#logan howlett#deadpool#wade wilson#deadpool 3#finding home au#worst wolverine#is the best#ororo munroe#storm xmen#storm#Headmistress storm#jean grey#xmen jean grey#charles xavier#professor x#charles xavier was for real Logans handler for the longest time#and now thats wades job#very scary#vietnam war#living with cptsd#x mansion
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