#“i fight monsters for a living”/ “oh yea? well i fought Death!”

[cowboybrunch]

Ohhhh shiiiiit it's STS and I have recovered from reading "attention span." JFC that was so good.

I want to rotate two of your blorbos (specifically Theo and Callan) next to each other with this question. For the purposes of not having someone's head explode, let's say the events of the story/first episode remain largely the same.

What would they do if they were in a time loop? Would they have someone to act as a constant (the Hofer to Sullivan or the Gott to Royston, e.g.) or would they have to do all the work themselves? Is there a win condition or is the time loop an infinite punishment?

oooo >:) lets put these men in a time loop! essay incoming <3

i'm imagining Callan is working a case alone (say Hoot and Lee are on a holiday to get em out of the way for now). it's going smoothly, he's putting the pieces together, nearly solved when he steps out into the street and a bus is barreling towards him, horn screaming, etc. at the last moment, he looks up and sees Theo staring at him from the other side of the road. they reset just before impact.

Theo realizes they're in a time loop first, but he wouldn't know why or how to stop it. there would be lots of blame tossed around. Theo assumes that Callan did something to cause the loop. Callan doesn't trust supernatural entities at all so he accuses Theo of sabotaging their efforts to close the loop (even tho Theo isn't sabotaging anything, he's just a teeny tiny bit incompetent inexperienced with solving mysteries)

basically, it's an uphill battle to get them to cooperate with each other. i see a big blowout fight where Theo is getting more and more agitated and Callan is listing off every time that Theo did something to undermine their investigation (very calm and rational in true Callan fashion) and then Theo just snaps. throws out a bit of honesty, maybe about how his whole life thus far has felt like a time loop because he keeps making the same stupid mistakes, and that vulnerability is what makes Callan think, oh. this guy really isn't the problem. he's as trapped as i am.

they don't have a Gott or a Hofer in that someone else is aware that time is looping, but the only person (not including [redacted] but we're talking post-botrd so that's not an option) Theo would go to for help would be Marcella. she doesn't believe that he's in a time loop BUT she helps him anyway. "he's finally lost it... but, fine. what can i do?" he has to rehash the situation every loop which frustrates the hell out of him so by the fifth or sixth loop he's got his concise explanation down flat. knows exactly what to say and how she'll react to the info. sweet.

(Marcella thinks Callan is cute in like, a condescending way. she pretends to curse him/threatens to become the monster beneath his bed just to see him squirm. Callan thinks Marcella and Lee would be peas in a pod, so his emotions towards her are... complicated)

probably around the 8th or 9th loop, Theo gets discouraged and figures this is just his life now, he's done, there's no escaping, typical Heir of Death melodrama. Callan's gotta pep talk him, which Callan isn't very good at. and somehow this convo leads to the realization that the win condition is Callan recognizing his own fallibility, that he's unfortunately a human being and can't possibly know or control everything. it's a lesson about hubris!

also i really like the idea that the bus shows up at the same time regardless of where they are. so they try to run from it, end up in the middle of the desert or somethin, not a road in sight and BAM! out of nowhere. bus. reset. in a restaurant? bus. in callan's apartment? BUS!

this was a ton of fun to think abt :-) Theo just might be an honorary paranormal investigator once they get this loop closed. thank u for the ask!!! <3

[yodawgiherd]

End of an Era

It was fun while it lasted guys :)

>>>Read on AO3<<<

And one night, without any warning, the last piece of the puzzle came. The dream told her everything, ran over the entirety of her life, and when the old and wrinkled soldier Mikasa closed her eyes for the last time, she woke up with unshed tears brimming in the corners.

Next to her, the devil she decapitated slept peacefully, with no marks or scars under his eyes. She didn’t want to wake him yet, as there was another person Mikasa needed to talk to right now, so getting out of the bed carefully she located her phone.

“M-Mikasa?”, a yawn, “It’s four in the morning, why are you calling me?”

“I’m sorry Armin, I have to ask you something.”, Mikasa whispered, keeping her voice low not to wake Eren, “please…”

“Sure, just…” another yawn, this time even longer, “Give me a second so I can collect my brain from the dreamland.”

Mikasa could hear the phone being put down and then the rustling of bedding on the other side as Armin was most likely stretching and fully waking up. She waited patiently until he picked the device up again, speaking in a much clearer voice.

“Ok, I guess I’m functional now. What’s up?”

“In the book you are writing, does the main pairing gets a happy ending? Do they get together?”

“I… Uh… Is that why you woke me?”

“Armin, please. It’s important to me.”

In truth, the blond had no idea why Mikasa was suddenly so interested in the ending of his story. Sure, she read it during development and said that it was good, but there’s a difference between that and calling at four AM to grill him about the ending she didn’t get to see yet because Armin finished it about a week ago. Then again, her voice was completely serious and while Mikasa did like some fun pranks from time to time, this didn’t sound like one at all. So, following her wish, Armin gave her an honest answer.

“No, they don’t. The girl is forced to kill her love interest to save the world from him, but it's sort of bittersweet because their friends get to live a happy life after.”

There was a gasp on the other side as if he confirmed some of Mikasa’s suspicions.

“Why?”

“Well, people like angst, and giving everyone a happy ending is a bit of a cliché, no? I mean…”

“Why her though, wasn’t she the heroine?”

“Yes, but she can move on in time you know, forget about him and whatnot.”

There was a bit of silence on the other side before Mikasa spoke again, this time in a small and sad voice.

“Could you change it? Please, for me.”

“How?”

“Just make her happy…”

Running a hand through his sleep-tussled hair Armin puffed out air, turning the possibilities in his head. It wouldn’t be that hard to make Mikasa’s wish come true. He had a lot of supernatural going on in his book, monsters, and gods, a simple resurrection wouldn’t break the story. Plus it was rare to hear Mikasa beg like this, she was usually the “cool and stoic” type, and it tugged at Armin’s heart.

Hell, why not.

“All right, I’ll do it somehow.”

“You will?!”

“Yeah, but you’ll owe me one.”

There was happy and relieved laughter on the other side.

“Of course, I’ll do anything Ar, thank you so much!”

With a click, the call ended and Mikasa let out a long breath, rubbing the unshed tears from her eyes. It would seem that Armin wasn’t writing a story, more like remembering it, but unlike the one that happened this one would get a different ending.

Mikasa told Eren everything over breakfast, hugging a warm cup of coffee with both hands. He didn’t say anything while she spoke, just listened, his green eyes taking all of her in, both words and gestures. Only when she finished did he let out a long breath, one that felt like he was holding in for an eternity.

“This is a lot to take in.”, he said, “Especially at once.”

“I know…, you don’t have to believe me but…”

“I believe you. Every word.”

“Just like that?”

A firm nod.

“You believe it, and I see no reason why I should not. Past lives and other-universe memories can exist, it's not like the entire human psyche has been mapped.”

He looked away for a second.

“The Eren you described, he is so different than me, yet so terrifyingly similar in some aspects. I can sit here and say that I would never cause the apocalypse but in his place…? I just can’t know for sure.”

“I guess we are lucky that we don’t have to find out.”, Mikasa offered, “This life is so much better than whatever they went through...”

“For sure.”

“And that’s not all.”

“What do you mean?”

“I… I think I married someone… Jean maybe? Had kids with him too.”

“Oh my god.”, Eren threw an arm over his face dramatically, “Out of all people, why him?”

“I… I don’t know if it was him but….”

“Please Miki, I get that I died, and you wanted to move on, but didn’t your past life have any taste ?”

“Hey! Jean is nice.”

He peeked at her from under his arm.

“Nice huh?”

“Yea, nice. You know what, if you die I’m going to marry him here too.”

The fingers that were till now peacefully resting on her hip curved and dug into her flesh, a dangerous flash in the emerald that stared at her.

“You’re just trying to rile me, is that it?”

She fought the grin, not wanting it to reveal the joke.

“Maybe…”

However, Eren’s grip weakened as his face grew distant, the classic “philosophical” look entering his features.

“Would that be fair to him though? Jean is… okay I guess, and you treating him like an afterthought, a second choice? Not nice.”

Mikasa’s smile faltered when she realized that, and Eren was not even done with his speech.

“Then again, if I’ll be dead then I guess I have no agenda in telling you what to do. Plus I think I’d be happier if you moved on and had a family instead of mourning me forever. You are too young for that.”

These words hit way too close to Mikasa’s dream, and she could feel the sadness rising in the chest again. To battle it, she took hold of Eren’s chin and tugged it down until their lips were touching.

“Hey, not more talk about death, okay?”, she ordered, “I had enough of that while sleeping.”

“Yes ma’am.”

When she kissed him, Mikasa’s sadness melted away again, chased away by Eren’s warmth against her. Maybe her other self had to settle for something else, but not her. She was here and she had the love of her life right in her arms, in her bed, and she couldn’t be happier about it.

Eren mulled the facts over for a time, putting them together in his head. It was a nice day outside, and while he did all the math Mikasa simply watched him with a faint smile on her lips. It was almost noon when he came to her with a new question.

“So let me get this straight – I didn’t achieve anything In the end? My island was still nuked and the monsters…”

“Titans.”, Mikasa corrected him.

“Right, titans. Those are still around? Man, I guess I was turned into a clown at the end.”

She didn’t know how to disagree with any of those points.

“And the point of it all was nothing? That no matter how hard you struggle to save something you hold dear it will end up destroyed anyway?”

“It does sound hopeless when you put it like that.”

He snorted.

“Guess I was a certified clown then – oh well, now you see what zero pussy does to a motherfuc…”

“No, no, oh my god.”, Mikasa interrupted him, “Why do you keep making fun of it, I swear you are such a kid and…”

“W-What?”, Eren had trouble speaking because of the laughter, “It’s true! I died for nothing in your dream, I was a joke.”

“No… It wasn’t like that.”

“Take it as you will, but all my nightmares became reality and…”

Eren tapped the table a few times, most likely trying to wrap his head around it all.

“…you married Jean.”

“Well… yea, that was a bit weird.”

“Was it? I mean, the guy had a crush on you.”

She blinked at him.

“It was just a tiny one if there even was one at all.”

“Oh c’mon Miki,”, Eren’s grin was wide, “You couldn’t be that dense.”

“I-I mean…”

Jean? A crush? It reminded her of that night, not that long ago when she found out that most if not all of her female friends would like to have some sort of intimate experiments with her.

“Doesn’t matter.”, she blurted, “He’s a good friend, and I like him a lot, but not romantically!”

“He will be heartbroken…”

“He will?”

“Nah,”, Eren chuckled, “Jean got over it, he and Hitch are happy together, as far as I know.”

“That’s good, a crush is hardly a good base for a real-life relationship.”

“Then I guess we can be happy that you guys married in a dream only.”

“Indeed.”, she reached over the table to gently touch his face, “Here I have you.”

Eren mirrored her gesture, letting his thumb stroke the scar on Mikasa’s cheek.

“And I have you.”

“Forever.”

“Sadly.”

“What was that?”

“Oh nothing baby…”, a devilish grin, “Yes, forever.”

With her dreams done and finished it was time to return to civilization, to leave the cabin life behind. Eren told her that he got this, very courteously, most likely still worried about her mental state.

“Just take it easy,”, he said, kissing the top of her head, “I’ll pack.”

He did as he said, fighting with the baggage to the best of his ability. Mikasa was left to wander around aimlessly, and for whatever reason her steps took her to the big tree sitting there, overlooking a vast plain of grass. Taking a deep breath of the fresh air she leaned on the tree, but then her eyes caught sight of something that almost made her jump out of her skin.

There was a ghost sitting there, a ghost of her, dressed in a simple skirt and shirt, the scarf still around her neck. The apparition was about the same age Mikasa was, maybe a bit younger, but they looked almost the same. Her hair wasn’t short, it was long and pulled into a ponytail and there was no red highlight decorating it. The ghost looked up, her eyes meeting Mikasa’s, and a faint smile crossed her lips.

It was her perfect copy, down to the scar on the cheek - albeit the ghost’s was even more faded than hers, long years washing over it. She must have gotten her cut as a teenager. And there was also something about the eyes – it would be a lie to say that Mikasa had an easy life, but what she saw in the ghost’s eyes was something different altogether. The sitting girl saw hell and more, and it showed in her face.

“You are me.”, Mikasa finally pushed out.

The ghost looked at her curiously, tilting her head to the side.

“You… you can’t speak, can you?”

The ghost shook her head.

“I wonder why….”

The sitting girl shrugged, not understanding this any more than Mikasa did. She was just about to question her further when something else caught her attention. The ghost wasn’t sitting there on her own, there was something next to her – a tombstone with a very familiar name written on it.

Eren Yeager

Mikasa already had a suspicion, but this confirmed it – the sitting girl was the other Mikasa, the one she had dreams about, her past life. Following her eyes the ghost saw what she was looking at, her smile replaced by a look of deep longing. Gently, she caressed the stone, her eyes shining with tears.

“So the dreams were right, huh? You had to kill him.”

The ghost nodded solemnly.

“You saved the world, everyone, but you had to give the love of your life up.”

The apparition didn’t react, eyes trained at the cold tombstone.

“They say that if you love something, you should let it go.”, she told the ghost, “But I can’t do that….”

Looking over her shoulder at the man she loved so much, Mikasa let the words spill freely.

“I guess I’m selfish but I don’t want to lose this love we have, no matter what kind of symbolism it is. I want to wake up next to him every morning and spend ten minutes getting out of his hands because he holds me so tightly when we sleep. I want to see him yawn and wish him good morning and share a cup of coffee. I want him to be there for me when I come back so we can talk about our days and cuddle on the couch together…”

Her hands intertwined on the abdomen, gently stroking the fabric of her shirt.

“I want to have children with him, family, kids that will combine my and his looks and attitude. Is that selfish? Is that too much to ask? Is that…”

Lost in her speech Mikasa stumbled over the words and fell silent, letting out a short laugh after.

“I’m selfish and I don’t care. I’m never letting go simply because I don’t want to and damn everyone who disagrees with me. I deserve this, I deserve to be loved.”

As soon as those words left Mikasa’s lips she realized how insensitive those were towards her other self, the poor girl who, for all her bravery, for the act of saving the world itself – got nothing.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you feel bad.”, she apologized to the sitting copy of herself, “I know that you never got to experience any of that with him.”

The ghost’s face fell and she buried her face to the scarf, eyes moving towards the headstone next to her. Seeing the longing written in her features, Mikasa couldn’t help but wonder.

“Did you… did you learn to let him go? Did you come to terms with his death?”

The pain in the girl’s eyes was all the answer Mikasa needed. It resonated within her, the suffering because she could imagine how it would feel. Maybe it was because she experienced it in her past life, maybe it was because of all these strange visions but she could do it and the pain and emptiness were terrible.

“This is not fair,”, she blurted, “You did everything you could, you saved the world and this was your reward? You’ve sacrificed… everything… and….”

She was crying now, Mikasa realized, her tears matching the ghost’s. Falling to her knees next to the girl she tried embracing her only to realize that she can’t touch a figment of her imagination.

“I’m so sorry for how the universe treated you, you deserved more, so, so much more….

More flashes- this time of a child, a faceless husband, grandkids too.

“This, all that… Did it make you happy?”

The ghost girl gave her a small enigmatic smile, and Mikasa realized one thing. It wasn’t for her to know – maybe she was happy with the other family, maybe she wasn’t, that would remain an enigma.

“But still, you kept visiting his grave,”, Mikasa’s eyes moved over to the headstone and the flowers there, “You never let his memory fade.”

A nod from the other girl.

“Still, it wasn’t fair to you. You could have been, no, should have been so much more…”, this time the raven’s eyes moved to where her Eren was, “You deserved to have a happy future with him too.”

“Yet you didn’t, and I did – you got the pain and I have the rewards you fought for. I swear, I will not let it go to waste.”

Standing up, she offered her hand to the ghost.

“Please, come with me, experience all that you bled for, struggled for so much. Let me show you how the love you wanted feels in full bloom.”

But the girl didn’t move, simply looking at her. And that was when Mikasa realized….

“… you don’t have to come with me because you are already here. You are me, I am you, we are the same person.”

It was strange, realizing that this was her- this old, tired soldier, a woman broken by a war Mikasa couldn’t even comprehend. A tragic hero who sacrificed her greatest love for the greater good, being left with nothing but a memory. A girl who was thrust into a cruel world and treated unfairly, no matter how hard she tried to change it, to save those she held dear. Tears in the corners of her eyes, Mikasa clenched her fists.

Not anymore.

Now there was no war, no titans, no apocalypse over their heads. Eren wouldn’t go to commit a global genocide to save his country, only to have it destroyed anyway. She wouldn’t marry another man and have children with him, bring her family to his grave, and plant flowers with pain in her heart. No.

Mikasa wasn’t a soldier anymore – she was an MMA fighter, a professional athlete, a model. Her life wasn’t filled with a constant struggle for survival. It was dreamy- filled with everything she could wish for, whatever it was spending her time with friends, goofing around with Eren, or training her pole dancing. She didn’t care for horses or sharpen her blades.

Eren wasn’t a hopeless maniac, driven to war by the sheer necessity of survival – he was a doctor, a surgeon, helping people in need not killing them.

Most importantly they were together – an engaged couple that loved each other so much that they couldn’t put it into words correctly. No tragedy would befall them.

Keeping her hand outstretched, Mikasa talked to the ghost again.

“We are one, but I am the lucky part of us, of me. I am love, I am the nights and lazy mornings spent in bed, I am all the kisses and hugs. You are my sadness, my sacrifice, my longing and pain, my unfulfilled and tragic fate.”

She stretched her fingers closer to the girl.

“Please, take my hand and experience it all with me, learn that there is beauty in this cruel world.”

Not hesitant anymore, the ghost held her hand towards Mikasa.

When their fingers made contact a chill ran down her spine and she gasped, blinking several times. The girl was gone, so was the grave, only the tree remained and gently swayed in the wind. And in her heart, in her soul, Mikasa felt different – different yet same because now she knew everything and the pain in her heart resonated.

It would always be a part of her, or rather it always was, but Mikasa wasn’t feeling down because of it. Now she knew that she had to feel everything, every touch and happy emotion that she experienced with him because it was what her past died for. If anything the full realization of her suffering made Mikasa appreciate it even more – she was living this life not only now but for the past too.

He was her Eren, she was his Mikasa, and in this world, nothing would tear them apart. And the tears the began to appear in her eyes did nothing to deny that fact.

“Miki? Why are you crying, what’s wrong?”

Refusing to answer Mikasa crossed the distance and hugged him, burying her face into Eren’s chest. Understanding that she didn’t want words now he stroked her back patiently, waiting for her to come back to him.

“Eren, you won’t ever leave me, will you?”

“Never.”

“I mean, I couldn’t do it even if wanted to.”

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t think I love you anymore, it’s more like fascination, adoration maybe.”

“…Eren…”

“Hell, I’d do anything to stay with you, you want me to bark for you? Cause I will..”

Despite her sad mood, Mikasa felt the smile tugging at the corners of her lips.

“Stop, come on.”

Ignoring that, he pressed his face into her hair, a quiet bark leaving his lips.

“Woof.”, he nuzzled her gently, “There, I did it.”

She giggled at that and Eren smirked, glad that he made her smile because that was his mission in life – making the beautiful angel he was, for some reason blessed by, happy.

It made her reflect on the whole story, now that she had it whole. Eren kept silent while Mikasa was deep in thought, his fingers gently stroking her hipbone in small soothing circles. In her mind, she recalled as much as she could, brought it together and….

Mikasa took a shuddering breath.

“It makes no god damn sense.”

“What doesn’t?”

“The whole story, It… it doesn’t add up at all. You dying for nothing, me moving on so quickly I… The whole world….”

She was pouting now, that adorable expression that made Eren want to kiss it right off of her face, but he held himself back. Mikasa was talking.

“It had such a nice build-up, but in the end, it collapsed completely. I don’t understand why….”

“Well, that is the thing with dreams.”, he mumbled next to her, “They often don’t make much sense once we wake up.”

“But still..”

“Mikiiiiiiiiii…”, unable to resist her cuteness anymore, he pressed a string of soft kisses all over her face, turning that pout into a breathless giggle, “Stop overthinking dreams so much.”

Grabbing her hand he intertwined their fingers, raising it so the sun slid over their skin. It highlighted the contrast between them, how his tanned shade complimented her pale one, just as perfectly as they completed one another in life.

“This. This is important.”, he said, “This is real. You may be a broken titan slayer in your dreams, but here you are… well, still a titan slayer but one that is happy… I think.”

His voice got even deeper when he directed his question right at her.

“Are you happy with me?”

Mikasa was nodding her head before she even realized what was happening.

“Yes. Gods yes, I couldn’t be happier.”

“See?”, the flash of white teeth revealed his grin, “Then focus on that. Here, in this world, I’m not going anywhere, and I’ll stay with you as long as you’ll have me.”

“That might be a very long time Yeager, are you sure that you want to do that to yourself?”

“As if I had a choice.”, his fingers danced over her hip, “You bound me to yourself with black magic, remember?”

“Good to see that you remember that. My Dark Knight.”

The kiss Eren gave her was interlaced with a smile, and it was one of the sweetest Mikasa ever got in her life. He was right, after all, her dreams, past self, it was a tragedy that befell her, but it was so jumbled at the end that she had a hard time taking it seriously. The “ending” of her past didn’t make sense, no matter how much she tried to see the point of it. It all looked like such a tragedy, but in the end…. was it maybe a comedy? A twisted image where all the sacrifice and pain they went through amounted to nothing? Where several characters were made to be worthless, and their struggle amounted to nothing? A parody of a terrible conflict that couldn’t be solved by anything else by an annihilation?

But... why dwell on it?

She had this- this life, this Eren, and this happiness that they built together, and she loved every second of it.

And there was nothing else that the past could show her anymore.

“Let’s get out of here.”

“You sure? Didn’t forget anything?”

Mikasa looked at the tree where the conversation with the ghost took place, smiling. Tightening her hold on Eren’s hand, she felt more content than ever before, finally having an explanation and ending for her nightmares. It all made sense, and she would live her life to the fullest with the love of her life – not only for herself but for the other Mikasa too. She deserved to experience it, every second of it. After all, they were one and the same.

“Yes. I have all I need right here with me.”

[perseusjackson-jasongrace]

I see your annabeth in tartarus alone and I raise you jason and percy in tartarus. Idk why those two would be but like imagine percy and jason both unleashing. The power. We saw potential dark percy but like jason could easily manipulate the air in the bodies cells. The nervous system has electricity in it (I think I dropped pe health biology oops) so like your whole system is fucked so yeah jason and percy just going full psycho almost ahhhh. Bruhif some1 wrote smthng like this I might cry

ANON, HOW DARE YOU MAKE ME FEEL THINGS??? Anyway obviously I had to write a lil something something because oooooo I love our boyyysss and I loovvveee it even more when our boys go dark so here have it!

Here’s the post referred to in the ask

Here’s the picture below

Masterlist

Jason Grace grinned flinging a hand out to wrap around a lean, corded arm.

"Thought you weren't gonna catch me for a sec Grace,"

"The only falling you're doing is for me Jackson,"

Percy laughed, eyes twinkling with mischief, "Save it for after we're out of this hellhole... literally."

"Oh I plan to," Jason purred.

They slammed into the ashen floor, dust and debris crunching under their feet.

"Just have to make it past this river and we're home free." Dark eyebrows creased in determination.

"I have never been so excited to get into a body of water before." The blonde shuddered.

"Hopefully I have enough strength to keep it from touching us," Percy's voice cracked.

Jason grabbed his hand, intertwining their fingers and squeezing softly. "We have gotten this far Pers, we will make it through. Together."

"Yea I know, I know," The half-blood shook his head, returning the reassuring squeeze.

Without letting go the two walked towards the Archeron. This crossing would be the hardest by far. The one that could end them. The river called to the miserable and who could be more miserable than two demigods who have fought their whole lives to stay alive and know they will fight even after this. The River of Woe. It was fitting that it'd be the last stop in this hellscape.

"Hello ssssweeetheartsss," A hissing started from behind them.

The demigods stiffened, clasped hands as white as sheets. Slowly they turned around, swords swinging aimlessly.

"Well well well I was starting to wonder when the dogs would bark," Percy smirked.

"Shut it ssssson of Poseidon," The thing spat.

"Hey that's no way to talk to people. Didn't your mother raise you to have some manners?" Jason chided, a gleam in his eyes.

"It will be ssssweet to kill you,"

"It'll be sweeter if you shut up," Percy snapped.

The thing smiled and it looked like dying. But what all these monsters failed to understand is that the half-bloods they faced did not fear death. The Son or Poseidon and the Child of Greece embraced it like an old friend, like a warm hug. They watched death smile and grinned back.

"Jase, I've been meaning to ask you," Percy mused, twirling his sword in his hand, "Have you figured out how to manipulate the electricity that controls our nervous system?"

Jason's eyes glittered, "Oh yea, I actually figured it out a couple of hours ago. Your blood-bending really had me thinking,"

The creature, with its serpent tail and fanged mouth, its ugly leathery wings and uneven scaled skin, glanced between them. Without warning it struck that spiked tail into Percy's side.

With a resounding clang the poisoned end bounced back, and slammed into the ground. The demigod looked up from where his now dented sword had been covering his side, green eyes glowing.

"That wasn't very nice,"

The monster let out a vile screech and pounced. Jason had a split second to bring his sword over his head before the rugged underside of this thing fell over him.

Before it could claw at the through skin and bone, the blonde was rolling onto his feet and slicing his sword into a charcoal wing. He could see Percy sawing at the other side and couldn't help the smile that graced his features. Percy's hair was curly and wild, his sea green eyes so bright they were luminescent, and the muscles in his torn shirt sleeve rippled as he worked through the wing.

The monster beneath their blades shrieked and thrashed but before long its wings were twitching on the floor. But with the pinion sliced off the demigods didn't have anything to keep it down so they were both unprepared when it swiped its tail across their legs, slamming their bodies into the ground.

With a groan Percy rolled over, "Fuck that hurt,"

"The next time I wanted us to be on our backs it involved much more fun activities than this," Jason growled.

Before either of them could get up, the heavy weight of cold, bony feet pressed them into the dirt.

"Not sssssoooo arrogant now," It cackled.

"Do you ever stop talking?" The black-haired boy sighed.

The creature hissed, claws protruding to rip out their throats, "I will kill you Percy Jac—"

It froze, eyes wide, claws stiff, sides leaking some variation of tar.

"If you ever," Jason’s voice was low, seductive with the promise of malice, "Ever threaten him again I will slaughter you so violently you will not even be remembered by history. I will scatter you so far the world will have to fold in on itself to put you back together. This is a warning."

And with that the monster contorted, limbs bending at awkward angles. It gave a disgusting shuddered, twitching and shaking, before falling to the floor and crumbling to dust.

"Damn Grace, is it weird that I am horribly turned on right now?" Percy threw a heartbreaking smile his way.

"You are such a freak, let's get out of here so I can explore it," Jason returned the smile.

"I'm holding you to that Lightning-Boi"

"Just get your ass over here so I can hold you." His voice was shaky as he held his hand out for Percy.

"Hey," The Son of Poseidon frowned, brushing golden hair back softly, "Hey, it’s okay. I'm here. I'm safe. You'd never let anything happen to me."

The blonde put a hand to his chest, feeling the steady heartbeat underneath.

"You aren't allowed to die on me. I will hunt you down and kill you again." His words were rough, stern, but the softness in his eyes melted Percy to the core.

"Only if you can promise me the same,"

The Son of Jupiter nodded, letting his forehead drop to rest against Percy's.

"Ready to cross the River of Misery?"

"One step closer," The black-haired boy sighed.

And with a final brush against a golden cheek, they intertwined their hands once more and stepped into the river that would take them home.

[slashingdisneypasta]

Hi, could you consider? Jason Voorhees x reader thing where the reader was Jasons friend before he died and now they visit the camp every year to pay their respects on the aniversity of his death and they sorta rekindle their friendship after a while?

I tried to go with big events or staples in Jason’s life ^^ But my knowledge of Friday the 13th movies is… a bit limited… my bad.  I hope you like it anyway!! I hope its what you wanted ^^

1958 (Reader and Jason are like, 12 here): 

When I… saw him, I was scared. At first. Not of him exactly, I don’t think at least, but of the entire situation. He was supposed to be dead, and things that are alive after that are never showed in a sweet light. Vampires, zombies, ghosts.

But then he held my hand like he always would and gently lead me to his old cabin, where apparently, he was still living. I felt happy, I gave him the picture I drew him, and he smiled at me. I thought he could come home with me now, and everything would be okay! But… something was different about it all. His hands were always cold, but now they felt freezing. He spoke even less then he used to, as well. And the cabin was dirty, and he couldn’t possibly live here comfortably.

And then, I asked him to come back with me and mum. “Its okay! Jason, now we can go back home, and you won’t have to live here! We can still be friends! I’ve missed you.”

He gives me a tiny smile back, but awkwardly pulls his icy hand away from me. Shaking his head, he steps back and sits on his mother old bed. Which is mouldy and where the sheets to be white, are brown now. So, I don’t sit with him. “I… can’t go… “

My heart sinks, because of something worse than disappointment. “But… you can’t live here!” There’s no food, or clean water, or proper shelter! And… no parents. The idea is insane!

I watch while his fingers clench into the mattress his mother used to sleep on, and feel a dull, slow realisation dawn on me. Like when you’re three days from having to go back to school after a wonderful holiday. “M-my… my mum… “ I look up him with wide, furrowed eyes while thinking about all his changes. He died, even though its hard to believe, looking at him. The cold isn’t bothering him, in some places moss from the water still clung to him in some places, he was comfortable in this place that I couldn’t ever stay in no matter how much someone paid me. He’s changed so much… to the point where, weirdly, he fits here. And I can’t think of a thing that I could say or do to change his mind.

For the first time in my life I feel completely, wholly helpless. There’s nothing I could ever do, to… save him. His eyes are duller than they were when… we were friends… and he’s not him anymore. Even though it look, and feels like him. My friend Jason is gone.

He’s gone somewhere I can’t follow him.

1983: 

Awkwardly, I purse my lips, looking around at the forest while Jason carves into some wood, bored himself. I think that’s the piece of wood he was working on last year. “Okay… well, bye Jason.” I have been waiting for this all day! I want nothing but to leave Jason and get back to my family, the people I chose. It no longer feels like a choice to see Jason, even if it only once a year.

Its not like he makes me, its more that I force myself to come because I have my whole life since he died and if I couldn’t handle the guilt if I left him alone on his anniversary day one year. It used to be nice, when once a year my mum would drive me up and here and I would get to see my friend, even if it was different and weird. But soon enough, somewhere between high school and getting married, it became a burden. Because, really, what do we have in common?? Nothing. Why are we dragging this on, when all we have in common is history? History means very little when theirs no good memories to give it substance.

Oh… shit. Even thinking that sentence in my head felt bad. Of course, there were good memories… but its been so long since we’ve made a new one that I’ve forgotten what it felt like. What little I do remember, from when we little, feels made up. That’s how little it surfaces now.

As I pat his shoulder and get up from the porch where we were sitting for 4 hours -Four long, painful hours, - I accidentally wobble a bit and get a glimpse of the back of his head on accident. For a moment I keep going, getting to my feet and turning to walk off to my car, before I realise that what I just saw was not normal. People do not have dents like that in the back their head. Well, I mean, some people with the same condition Jason has sometimes do, but he was not born with this particular depression. I whip back around, surprising him and look shocked at him. “What the hell is that!?” He grunts, and shifts uncomfortably at that because he doesn’t talk anymore, and I soften my look a tiny bit in apology, knowing he doesn’t like swearing. “Right, sorry.” I roll my eyes. “But what is that crater in the back of your head Jason?!”

He sighs, deeply and shrugs.

“No, don’t you give me that. What is it? You bang your head on a branch or something??”

Not sure how a branch would make that kind of dent, but, it works to get the ball rolling. Maybe he’ll think the idea is so ridiculous that he communicates to me what it was just to set me straight. He does think I’m kind of ridiculous.

Yea, because he’s a hobo recluse who lives in the forest all alone, so he’s wiser apparently.

I watch him roll his eyes, before thumping on away from the cabin, leaving me alone abruptly, before coming back with an axe which is… not comforting. I glance from it to him and back again a few times, and he just rolls his eyes and shakes his head again.

Then he holds it up to thoroughly show me, causing me to notice the blood on it, then touches it to the dent. Finally, he grabs my hand -his is still cold as fuck, -, and holds it to his chest. Where there’s no heartbeat.

“What?” At first, I don’t get it at all, scrunching up nose in obvious confusion.

Then… slowly… it dawns on me. I gasp. “Who hit you in the head with an axe??!” He was already pretty dead, but this is new. Can’t say I feel surprised at all that he can live without a heartbeat, seeing as he survived drowning when he was 11, but this is new, at least.

Now he’s really gone somewhere I can’t follow. And can’t relate to.

2003:

I don’t know how long I’ve been out for, but it can’t be long when I open my eyes -the word a little blurred at first. The only things I can make out being a giant dark looking thing that could be a rock looking very still and another, brighter coloured one jumping on it.

Eventually those figures turn into Jason and that fucker that slashed me, - because they’re both still there near me. As far as I can see from the fight, as I get up from the earth and leaves and little twigs and dirt drop off my clothes and the wounds across my abdomen hurt like hell, is that Freddy’s doing most of the fighting, but Jason isn’t taking much damage. Good… okay… what can I do… I think, as I look around for a weapon.

Gadzooks! It’s my lucky day. Behind them, near me, I catch sight of Jason’s machete. He must have dropped it… Works for me.

On my way over to them, watching to see if either of them notice me back up on my feet, I pick up the weapon. Luckily, I’m pretty sure they both think I’m dead. So, it’s that much sweeter when I reach them and tighten my grip on the very long, sharp sword thing. Then I grit my teeth and ram the disagreeable thing into someone even more disagreeable.

Jason watches with a sense of surprise that I’m only just able to pick up on, because I know him so well, and a tiny flutter of a smile crosses my, probably terrible looking at the moment, face. “You couldn’t get rid of me when you died, and you certainly won’t just because I do.” I say, out of breath. These two may be immortal with the freaken stamina of 30-year old’s but I, am an old woman now. And kicking ass takes a bit out of me. Being too smart to drop the machete, instead roughly pulling it out of the sweater-wearers spine and walk with a slight limp, away from the scene. God, fucking… I really, almost died just then. And it feels like it. Where’s my phone? I need a goddamn ambulance.

Freddy, still alive I’m sure - a stab in the back is not going to keep him down, but I figure it’ll handicap him enough for Jason to take a good lead, - slips to his knees and I listen to the sweet melody of him groaning in pain as I hobble over to a considerably clearer area of earth, to sit down on and assess my injuries. “Bitch… “

Serves him right, the bastard. There are three deep scratches in my stomach, thoroughly ruining my one good white shirt, and making me a little woozy due to the blood loss. I look up from them to Jason, who’s staring at me in worry instead of finishing the fight. To reassure him, I flash a bigger smile and nod, gesturing for him to go on. “I’m fine, Jason. It’s okay. I’ll be waiting right here when you’re done.”

“Yeah- Hockey Puck -Fight hard for your girlfriend, heh heh,”

I look back down at my wounds and start thinking about what I need to do about them, ignoring the goblin completely. I hear a terrible, raspy gasp and then some screaming, and I know Jason’s thrown Freddy somewhere again.

An hour later, I’ve watched the teenagers leave, the group now cut cleanly in half and wait patiently, anxiously for Jason to come back too. The longer I wait, the worse I feel. dread fills up every part of my body that isn’t already full with pain from my wounds and a plain, dull, aching fear and I’m suddenly struck in the face with the thought that maybe Jason won’t come back. Maybe he’ll really lose this time.

He’s never fought someone like him before. This whole time I thought he was some invincible, super monster but, what if by monster standards he’s not??

I’ve never really felt the worry I’m feeling now. Not since he drowned, the first time. All these years after I’ve just coasted along with him, visiting once a year and forgetting about him the rest. It was like a chore, like something I had to do.

But now I’m afraid to death that he’s actually gone, and I’m stuck, stewing in the fact that I care about him. He’s an old friend, I love him. He can’t… he can’t die first. I’m the weak human!

I can’t believe I’m only realising this now. What an absolute idiot.

Just as I’m pushing myself up to my feet, to go searching in the direction he went in, I hear familiar, heavy footsteps and nearly damn well cry suddenly with immense relief. I sit back down, heavily and hide my face in my knees once I’ve seen him, trudging towards me. He looks so bad, but… animated. And that’s the main thing.

Ohhhh my god…

I feel the behemoth of a zombie, familiar to me in every sense of the word, like childhood, teenage, young adult, middle aged, and every other kind of memory put into one sit down on the grass with me. I peak up at him and can’t help the smile on my lips, tugging at the corners of my lips as the sun starts to come up over Camp Crystal Lake.

Sighing in relief, I explain my reaction to his return. “You’re okay?”

He nods, and raises 5 thick fingers to my stomach in question. I take his hand in mine, instead of leaving it to hang, and it feels good. “That’s fine. I’ll be okay. Thank you for asking, Jason.”

He curls his hand around mine in turn, as I lie down on the lush green grass, and try to rest. Finally, things feel alright again.

My eyes fall gently closed. Now I’ll go somewhere he can’t follow me. He’s never been good at death.

[waitimcomingtoo]

In Case You Don’t Live Forever- Chapter Five

Pairing: Peter Parker x Venom! Reader

Warnings: none

Authors note: thank you so much for the positive feedback! It means the world to me. I’m so glad you’re enjoying the story.

Masterlist

“Why are you in such a mood?” Ned asked his best friend. Peter had been grumpy all morning. Ned was quick to notice the change in Peters behavior. He usually came in exhausted but eager to share the adventures from the night before.

“I got my ass beat last night.” Peter grumbled. Ned should’ve known his sour mood was related to his superhero duties.

“By who?” Ned asked.

“I don’t even know. I think it was some kind of alien.” Peter said. He shuddered at the thought of his encounter with the monster.

“What’d it look like?” Ned asked. It wasn’t uncommon for Ned to ask a million questions after being told something Spider-Man related. After all, he was the guy in the chair.

“Like nothing I’ve ever seen before.” Peter said. He swallowed and tried to push the previous night from his mind. He’d rather focus on this morning, and the moment he and Y/N had shared. Peter felt such a strong connection to her. He would’ve stayed on that rooftop all day if he could.

“Describe it to me.” Ned pleaded, tearing Peter from his thoughts.

“I don’t know. It was like eight feet tall, black, and bald. And it was super veiny.” Peter grimaced. Ned’s eyes widened.

“Oh my God you fought Shaquille O’Neal.” Ned gasped.

“Keep your voice down. I did not fight Shaquille O’Neal.” Peter whispered harshly. Ned always seemed one step away from blowing Peters cover. Peter gave bashful smiles to the students around him who gave him weird looks upon hearing Ned’s words. Ned didn’t seem to notice.

“Terry Crews?” He continued. Peter rolled his eyes at his best friend and starting walking to class.

“No. This is serious.” Peter said, his voice heavy with annoyance.

“I know it’s serious. You got beat up by The Rock.” Ned remarked. Peter fidgeted with the strings on his backpack. It was still crushing him that he got beaten so easily by Venom.

“The Rock is Samoan, not black.” Peter corrected.

“I know. But I heard “bald” and I just automatically envisioned The Rock.” Ned defended.

“There’s another thing. It had this huge, gaping mouth with rows and rows of teeth. I keep thinking about it. It came so close to me. And it’s tongue was super long. It was like a frog, but on hella steroids.” Peter did his best to create a vision for Ned.

“So a ninja turtle? You got beat up by a ninja turtle?” Ned asked. Ned’s questions went from joking around to sounding genuine. Peter worried his best friend actually thought he fought a ninja turtle.

“It wasn’t a ninja turtle. It was black, remember?” Peter said.

“So an emo ninja turtle.” Ned deadpanned. Peter was barely listening at this point. He thought for a moment.

“And it kept saying “we”. “ Peter remembered.

“What do you mean?” Ned asked.

“There was only one of them, but they only referred to themself as “we” as if there were

multiple of them.” Peter explained. Ned furrowed his brows.

“Do you think there could be more? Like an alien army or something?” Ned asked incredulously. Peter hadn’t even thought about that.

“Maybe. I remember something else, it’s name was Venom.” Peter recalled. He distinctly remembered those words coming out of the creatures mouth.

“Venom?” Ned inquired.

“Yeah. And it knew who I was. It-uh they- called me Spiderman and I never even said my name. They must’ve recognized me.” Peter said. It haunted him knowing the creature knew who he was. He wondered if it knew both of his identities.

“They probably saw you on YouTube.” Ned said. He gasped suddenly. “Does that mean they have YouTube in space?” He asked.

“I don’t know, Ned. I’ve told you all I know.” Peter said. They took their seats at their lab table and absentmindedly began working on a lab. Neither boy paid too much attention to their work.

“Actually, wait. One more thing happened.” Peter whispered, suddenly remembering something.

“What?” Ned whispered back.

“Venom was about to eat me when it started talking to itself. It sounded maybe like it was having a conversation with someone but I could only hear one side of it. It put me down, well it threw me down, and let me go. But before it left, it said something about a girl. I don’t really remember. I was too focused on catching my breath.” Peter said. Ned looked confused.

“Oh yea. It choked me.” Peter said. He had forgotten to tell Ned that part. Ned smirked.

“Kinky.” He said. Peter hit him with his paper.

“That’s gross. Did I tell you about this morning with Y/N?” Peter asked. A smile broke out on his face when he remembered their special encounter. She took his mind off Venom.

“No. Tell me.” Ned said. He wasn’t disappointed in the change of topic. He was glad Peter had moved on on from Liz, finally. Peter recounted the discussion he and Y/N had that morning. Peter could barely get through it without blushing and laughing at certain parts. Ned smiles as he watched his best friend get flustered over a girl.

“I really like her Ned. More than I’ve ever liked anyone. She’s so amazing. I barely know her, but I can tell already. I want to know everything about her. I want to hear her full story. And most of all, I want to be a part of that story.” Peter sighed. He frowned suddenly.

“What’s wrong?” Ned asked.

“After our talk, we just kinda sat there staring at each other for a while. She kinda leaned in, and I did too, but then this seagull flew by and scared us half to death. We laughed about it but the moment was gone.” Peter said.

“So you almost kissed her?” Ned asked. “Why is that upsetting you?”

“Because what if that was our chance and I blew it? What if that seagull was a sign from above that I was in way over my head? Like God was asking me who I was to think I could just kiss the most perfect girl in the world? She’s such a gem, Ned. There’s no way anything could happen between us. She used to be engaged and I’ve never even kissed anyone.” Peter slumped in his chair.

“If it’s meant to happen, it will happen.” Ned assured him. Peter looked at him sadly.

“Or, the same thing that happened with Liz will happen. I won’t tell her how I feel and then she’ll be gone forever.” Peter said quietly.

“Then don’t let that happen. Tell Y/N how you feel. Do it tonight, before you go on patrol. And if she doesn’t feel the same, then at least you’ll know. Isn’t it better to know?” Ned asked. Peter smiled at his friend.

“When did you become such a love expert?” Peter teased.

“Since I started dating Betty. She’s opened my eyes to what love really is. Have you ever seen The Notebook?” Ned asked. Peter shook his head.

“Then you’re an empty shell of a man.” Ned deadpanned. Peter laughed, but Ned didn’t.

“Tell her tonight. Then tell me how it goes. I’m here for you either way.” Ned patted Peters back. Peter nodded and gave Ned a thankful smile before turning back to his lab.

Peter saw Y/N walking to her apartment after school. He remembered what Ned said and took a moment to build up confidence. It was now or never.

“Hey, Y/N, wait up!” Peter called. I turned around and smiled.

“Hey Parker. How was kindergarten?” I asked in my phoniest mom voice. Peter rolled his eyes at me.

“Alright alright. I’m only two years younger than you. Relax. I don’t want you to have a heart attack on me, grandma.” Peter dished back. I shook my head at him.

“Nice one, sonny. Just for that, you can have a candy from the bottom of my purse. You’re lucky too, it’s from the Cold War.” I retorted. Peter and I cringed at ourselves.

“We’re…gross.” He said. I laughed in agreement.

“We really are. Couple of gross ass orphans.” I replied, referring back to our conversation from that morning. Peter laughed at the memory. I balanced the laundry basket I was carrying on my hip. I had run out of clothes and could only find some bike shorts and a black tank top to wear. Peter gulped nervously at the sight of my outfit. I pretended not to notice, even though that was the exact reaction I hoped to get.

“Look, Y/N, I really enjoyed our talk this morning. I really enjoyed all our talks so far actually. I guess I just like talking to you. ” Peter began. He looked nervous all the sudden, like he lost his stamina. I didn’t want him to retreat, though I feared he might be. I could feel my heart beginning to race. There were only so many ways this conversation could go.

“I like talking to you too, Peter.” I said honestly, hoping he’d continue. Hoping he’d ask that question. My answer seemed to give Peter the confidence he needed to go on.

“Really? Um, that’s great cause I really like talking to you too. I already said that. Oh god. I’m crashing. I-“ he began to flail and I calmed his down by taking a few steps closer. We were almost touching at that point. He stopped talking immediately and looked at me with wide eyes. I stared into his with innocent ones.

“Is there someone you wanted to ask me, Peter?” I asked. Please say yes. Please make me yours.

“Yes, actually. I, um, will you…would you maybe want to-“

“Hiya kids!” A gravely voice came from behind me, completely cutting Peter off. Peter looked up and angrily rolled his eyes.

“Don’t turn around. It’s Henry.” Peter grumbled. Henry was the creepy neighbor with the foot fetish. I stayed where I was.

“Oh Dear God.” Peter said in a low voice.

“What?” I panicked.

“You’re wearing flip flops.” He pointed at my black painted toes. I felt the color drain from my face.

“Run!” He whispered harshly. I bolted into my apartment and Peter ran into his. Once inside, Peter blew out an angry breath. He and Y/N had been interrupted twice in one day. Peter worried that it was a sign.

Back at the apartment, I sat on my bed with my headphones in. I was writing down some questions I wanted to ask Cletus Kasady when I interviewed him in a few weeks. It was hard figuring out what to ask a serial killer. I looked at my notepad and sighed. All I had written down was “but why tho?” in sloppy handwriting. I tore out the page, crumbled it up, and threw it at the trash can. I went to write something else down when I noticed the paper ball still stuck to my hand. I shook my hand but it wouldn’t come off.

“What the hell?” I asked.

“Oh. This might be my fault.” Venom said.

“What might be your fault?” I asked as I tried to shake the paper off my hand, but to no avail.

“I sort of went inside Spider-Man when we were talking to him yesterday.” Venom said timidly. The paper ball dropped from my hand.

“What?” I demanded. Venom was silent.

“Come out here.” I said, like an owner to a dog.

“I’d rather stay inside.” Venom said softly.

“Get out here now. You need to explain yourself young lady.” I said sternly. Venom slowly manifested and looked at me with sad eyes.

“I’m 600 million years old, by the way. You can’t call me young lady.” Venom said sheepishly. I gave her a pointed look. She looked down in shame.

“What do you mean you went inside Spider-Man?” I asked.

“When we were choking him I put one of my tendrils inside him and swirled around. He didn’t even feel it. I did though. He’s very squishy on the inside.” Venom explained. I couldn’t believe my ears.

“You...what?” I didn’t even know where to start. “How does that explain the ball sticking to me?” I asked.

“I’m pretty sure we absorbed his powers.” Venom said. “I used to watch videos of him on YouTube after you went to bed. He can stick to walls and stuff. I think that’s why the paper ball stuck to you.” Venom said. I looked at her with wide eyes.

“Since when can we absorb powers?” I asked.

“I’ve never had a host before Y/N. I don’t really know how it works. But back on Klyntar, my home planet, the Grandmaster used to tell us we could absorb the powers of superhuman beings. I wanted to test it out on Spider-Man. Judging by your newfound stickiness, I think it worked.” Venom explained. I looked at her for a long time.

“What else can Spider-Man do?” I asked. “Since you’re such a big fan.” I added.

“He can shoot webs out of his wrists. And he can return lost dogs.” Venom said. She sounded almost annoyed.

“Do you have something against Spider-Man?” I wondered.

“I just hate what he did last night. He thought we were the bad guy, and he let the real bad guy get away. He judged us before he had the full story. We’re not a bad guy.” Venom defended. I was surprised to hear how passionate she was about this. I gave her a soft smile.

“Let’s not worry about Spider-Man right now. I want to test out our new abilities. Let’s rock and roll, baby.” I said, complete with rock and roll hands. But the second I touched my middle finger and my ring finger to my palm, a black, web-like tendril shot out from my wrist and stuck to the ceiling.

I couldn’t even speak I was so shocked. I could only make a small squeaking sound.

“I guess that’s one of our new abilities.” Venom said. I looked back and forth between her and the gooey web coming out of my wrist.

“Oh my God! What’s happening?” I screamed. I took my fingers off my palm and the web retracted back into my wrist. I looked at my wrist incredulously. I made the rock and roll hand again and the same web shot out from my wrist, this time grabbing my ceiling fan. I pulled the web where it connected to my wrist and it came unattached with ease.

“V-Venom?” I asked. I didn’t know what to say.

“Try to aim it at something.” She suggested. I aimed my wrist and the lamp across the room and touched my fingers to my palm. The black web shot across the room and grabbed onto the lamp. I quickly yanked my arm back to pull the lamp towards me. The lamp flew across the room, smashed me in the face, and gave me a bloody nose.

“Ow.” I cried, gingerly touching my nose.

“I see this as a absolutely win.” Venom cheered. I shot her a look and went to get cleaned up.

After about a week of practice, and very little work on my questions for Cletus, Venom and I had mastered our webbing ability. We worked on our aim day and night. Soon, we were grabbing things from all around the apartment without moving from the couch. Of course, the week also consisted of long talks with Peter on the roof, late patrols of New York, the occasional run in with a criminal, late night FaceTime calls with Peter, and beating the shit out of Spider-Man, twice. Venom and I grew bored of using our powers around the house. It was time for the final test.

We stood at the rooftop ledge and looked down.

“It’s a long way down.” I commented.

“Yep.” Venom replied.

“We could die.” I said.

“Yep.”

“Ready?” I asked.

“We’re ready.” Venom grinned.

“Here goes nothing. Mask!” I yelled.

“Copy!” Venom answered. We turned into Venom and jumped off the roof.

Venom and I fell freely for a while. I screamed the whole way down.

“Stop being a little bitch! Shoot a web!” Venom yelled. I aimed a web at a building and began to swing. I was too close to the ground and ended up knocking over a bunch of tables at an out door restaurant. People ran away in fear. A few people took out their cameras and recorded.

“We’re not here to hurt you! Peace and love!” We yelled as we continued to swing through the steers of New York. People began to cheer.

“Do you hear that, Y/N? People are cheering. They love us.” Venom said happily.

“I love us too.” I said. I was even happier. I knew how much it hurt Venom to be seen as a monster. It’s why she hated being called a parasite. I also knew it was why she hated Spider-Man. He was praised for stopping bad guys while we were seen as one of the bad guys he needed to stop.

“Hey, what is that thing?” A man called from the street. Venom stopped swinging and landed on the street. We proudly turned to the crowd of people, a massive grin on our face. There it was, our favorite question.

“We…are Venom.” We growled. People took pictures and videos of us from a distance.

“You can come closer. We won’t hurt you.” Venom said. People didn’t listen. They kept their distance. I could feel how it hurt Venom.

“Are you like the anti Spider-Man?” Someone asked.

“Spider-Man is a joke. He can’t protect this city like we can. We are no Spider-Man. We are Venom.” Venom roared. A few people took a step back. I began to feel uneasy.

“Hey, King Kong. I want a word with you.” A sassy voice quipped from the crowd. A man in yellow sunglasses and a suit stepped forward. I nearly fell over.

“My name is Tony Stark. Would you mind coming back to my tower with me?” He asked. The people in the crowd slowly dispersed. We stood there alone with Tony Stark, freaking Iron Man.

“Be nice. Say yes.” I told Venom.

“Who is this guy?” She asked.

“I just said my name.” Tony said, slightly annoyed.

“He’s a really famous inventor. I’ll explain later. Just follow him please.” I begged. Venom gave Tony a once over and followed him to a limo.

“Yea, you’re gonna ride up top big guy.” Tony said, patting the roof of the car.

“Girl.” Venom growled. Tony looked surprised.

“My apologies ma’am.” He said. We rode on top of his car all the way to his tower.

The inside was huge. Tony lead us to a lab that was bigger than mine and Peters apartments combined.

“I’ve seen videos of you on YouTube. Seems like you and Spider-Man aren’t the best of friends.” Tony remarked.

“We will crush his bones and snort them like cocaine.” Venom growled. Tony was just as surprised to hear that as I was.

“Now that’s a visual. I’ll have you know, Spider-Man is a friend of mine. He’s not your biggest fan either but from what I’ve seen, you’ve done this city some good since you’ve been here. How long has that been?” Tony asked.

“Two weeks.” Venom answered.

“I thought so. I’d never seen you before then. And since your arrival, petty crime has dropped significantly in Queens. Criminals are too scared of getting eaten to do anything. Don’t get me wrong, I love Spider-Man and I’ll kill you if you tell him that, but no one fears him. He gets the job done, but there’s always another job to do. With you, on the other hand, your mere presence is preventing crime before it even happens. You’re scary, is what I’m trying to say. But you’re a good guy. It’s rare. I want it to stay that way. I want you on my team.” Tony exclaimed. We cocked our head.

“Team?” We asked.

“We’re called the Avengers. We had a bit of a falling out but the name still stands. We fight bad guys together. Really, really bad guys. I think you could us some good. You’ll be taken care of for life and we’ll only call you in for serious threats. But I need a few things from you first.” Tony bartered. We nodded.

“Like what?”

“Your story. How does a giant, anthropomorphic alien wind up in New York City?” Tony asked.

“It’s a long story.” We said.

“We can trust this man, Venom. I’m gonna come out okay?” I said. Venom hesitated. Tony looked impatient to know more.

“Are you sure?” She asked. Tony looked confused.

“Am I sure?” He asked. Venom shook her head.

“Not you.” She said. Tony looked around for who else Venom could be talking to.

“I’m sure. This guy is one of the good guys. We can trust him. I promise. I’m coming out.” I said. Venom went back inside, leaving me standing in front of a very wide eyed Tony Stark. Venom stayed in her snake-like form and rested on my neck.

“Hello, Mr. Stark. My name is Y/N L/N. This is Venom. We want to help.” I said. Tony’s face shifted from shocked to impressed.

“Alright, flubber. But you have to talk first.” Tony said. I nodded and told him the story of how we became Venom.

After my story, Tony let out a light chuckle.

“I gotta say, I did not except such a nice kid to be inside that scary monster.” Tony said. It hurt to be called a monster by a man you admired.

“We’re not a monster, Mr. Stark. We want to help people.” I reminded him. Tony smiled at me.

“I can see that. That’s why I’ve been developing you a suit.” Tony said.

“When did you do that? We just met.” I pointed out.

“Oh, I know. I’ve been designing it while you talked. I want you to have it incase you and Venom get separated. That way, you’ll be protected until you’re back together.” Tony explained as he showed me his little notepad. Sure enough, it had a drawing of a suit on it along with details from my story.

“I’ll get started right away. I just need a little piece of Venom. If I make the suit using her skin, you’ll have the total protection you need.” Tony said. I looked at Venom for consent. Venom nodded and extended a tendril towards Tony. He snipped a piece off and put it in a container.

“When will the suit be ready? A few months?” I asked. Tony stopped looking at the container and laughed.

“Y/N, I’m a genius inventor. Go get lunch. It’ll be ready when you’re done.” He said.

And he wasn’t kidding. An hour and a half later, Tony presented us with a suit. I ran my fingers over it slowly, not wanted to disturb a single things. I looked at it in awe, completely speechless.

“Go on, try it on.” He winked. I rushed to the bathroom to put it on. I came out with tears in my eyes.

“You like it?” Tony asked. I looked at my covered hands in amazement. The suit was jet black, like Venom was, and hugged my body like a second skin. There was a big white spider symbol on the front, the complete opposite of Spider-Mans small black one. I figured it was a nod to being called the anti Spider-Man. It was perfect.

“Well?” Tony was still waiting for an answer. I looked up at him just as a few tears fell down my cheeks.

“We didn’t celebrate my birthday growing up because it was the anniversary of my moms death. I used to be so upset every year.” I blurted. Tony looked like he didn’t know what to say. I couldn’t blame him. That was something deeply personal and I had only just met him.

“What I’m trying to say is, I get it now. All those missed birthdays were for a reason. I didn’t get gifts those days because I’m getting the ultimate gift right now. This is the most amazing thing I could’ve asked for. I cannot thank you enough Mr. Stark. I’ll never take it off.” I promised. Tony looked pleased with himself.

“You can’t take it off anyway. When you don’t want to wear it, it absorbs back into your skin like Venom does. And it’s equipped with Venoms essential abilities. It’s bullet proof, knife proof, taser proof, spork proof and so on. And you can still shoot your webby things. You just won’t have super strength, super speed, or that Venus flytrap mouth of yours.” Tony explained. I tested it out and shot a web towards his desk. I grabbed a pen and caught it with ease, then looked at Tony for approval.

“That’s the best I could do. It’s no Iron Man suit but it’ll suffice.” Tony said casually. I couldn’t take it anymore. I rushed towards him and hugged him tightly.

“Thank you.” I said into his chest. Tony patted my back awkwardly and I let go. I adjusted my suit and stood in front of him.

“I don’t know how to thank you.” I admitted.

“Eh. It’s nothing. You can thank me by not eating Spider-Man. I know he’s annoying but he doesn’t mean any harm. Now go forth and do good.” Tony requested. I agreed, much to Venoms protest.

We swung back to the apartment and landed in the roof. I turned back into myself and made my way down the steps to my floor. I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face. After this mornings conversation with Peter and the incredible suit from Mr. Stark, I was having a great day. For the first time in years, I couldn’t wait for tomorrow.

Tag List 🏷

@monimiin @truthdaze @honeyccoated @constellationswithapurpose @condy-wants-a-cookie @zipp0flare @vxidnik @maddie-laufeyson @bubblegumholland @the-blindwatcher @pmvelez97 @lunalustrix @strangemaximoff

[sillylittlewritings0]

Leaving Normal

Bucky Barnes x reader

• Peter Quil x reader (platonic)

-ENDGAME SPOILERS

-Go no further if you have not seen Endgame and don’t want it to be spoiled

Warnings: Angst but only for a second/ mentions of sex and kind of smutty but nothing R rated

Y/n lost Bucky in the snap, and during the final battle, finally got him back by her side. Now they are trying to pick up the pieces of the aftermath, together.

———————————————————————

*flashback*

Struggling to get back up after being knocked down countless times by the Titan, you look up toward Steve. His eyes are fierce, yet fearful at the same time. He straps on his broken shield, a bad omen it seemed, and held his hand out for me to take. You grasped his hand as he pulled you up to your feet. The two of you looked at each other, and nodded. Steve was right, this was the fight of your lives, and with Thanos’s approaching army, it seemed like it would be your last. You both knew going in to this, the odds would be against your side, heavily. One thing for certain, is if you couldn’t protect the Earth and its people, you will damn sure avenge it. You readied your weapons and held a fighting stance to get ready to attack. As you did, you said what you thought would be your final thoughts. ‘Bucky, I love you. See you soon.’

“Wait!” Steve held you back, as he held his communications closely to his ear. Confused, you were about to ask him what the hell was going on, when T’Challa and Shuri appeared out of an orange portal, along with Okoye by their side. With them came all of the Wakandan tribes and their armies, emerging and ready to fight. You were in such disbelief and awe, as more and more orange portals opened up all around us, as everyone we thought were dead came back to us, and more we did not know yet. Tears in your eyes and a swelling in your heart as you saw all your family, old friends and new, surround us and ready to stand together. You suddenly remembered Bucky, and froze. Does this mean all who disappeared have returned?

You turned around and ran, scanning the large crowd looking for him. As you pushed yourself past the others, you ran into Wanda.

“Oh Wanda, you’re back!” you said overjoyed and wrapped her into a tight hug.

She smiled and returned my hug back, “I missed you so much. We’ll have to catch up later, Thanos has something to pay for” she let you go, and let her powers take over. But not before she turned around to look at you and say, “he’s back a little farther.”

You thanked her, and continued your search. Finally, you stumbled upon him, his back toward you, as you gazed upon his beautiful brown long locks. He had just taken down a monster from Thanos’s army, and turned around as soon as you walked up beside him. You both had about 7 feet of distance between you, as you stared at him, in disbelief. He finally took a step forward.

“Ya gonna come give me some love, or just keep standin there, doll?”He said smirking.

You ran up and jumped into his arms, wrapping my legs around his torso, and sobbed.

“Hey there, sweet girl. I’m back.” Bucky said, as he soothingly stroked your hair and kissed the side of your head.

You continued bawling, “oh god, I missed you so much, Buck. You have no idea how long it’s been-I-I love you so much.”

He started tearing up, and smiled. “I take it that it was longer for you than me, but anytime apart from you is too damn long. I love you too doll, thanks for fighting for me and the rest of us.”

You smiled at him and kissed the hand he was cradling your face in. “I never gave up, I’ll always fight for you and be right here by your side.”

He pulled you in for a hug, and then held your face closer to finally press his lips against yours. Five years. It had been five years since you felt his soft lips on yours once again. You wanted to cry again, and savor the moment, but soon remembered the battle still taking place.

You put our reunion on pause, and took on the rest of the attack side by side, like you were always meant to be.

*Shortly after the battle*

You wiped away all the grime, blood, dirt, and fresh tears away from my face. You couldn’t bear to see Peter and Piper mourning over the death of Tony. You felt your own face wet with tears over the man who saved the universe. Tony has always been there for everyone, and you knew all he ever wanted to do was protect all the people he loved and the everyone else on Earth. It broke you, knowing that he left the love of his life, and little girl behind. He died a hero, no less, but the loss was greater than any other. You sat down on the ruins, Bucky wrapping his arms around me as you cried.

He kissed your cheek and squeezed you tight. “I’m so sorry, y/n. All of you, that didn’t give up hope, sacrificed, and did your part to save us and the whole goddamn universe, you’re the true heroes. That sure as hell includes Stark.”

You wiped my tears, and sniffed. “You gave me a reason to fight for the good of all. We all did, Buck. It just breaks my heart that Tony had to give up his reasons to win the fight. The world and team is never going to be the same without him.” You quietly cried more as he continued to hold me.

All you wanted to do was stay wrapped up in his arms, and never leave again. Hold him close, and whisper how much he means to you, in case he disappears again. But as we held each other, you looked up and saw Quill standing behind you and Bucky. You looked up toward Bucky. “Hey, I’ll be right back. I have an old friend I need to catch up with.” He gave a small smile, nodded, and gave you one last quick peck on the lips. You stood up and walked over to Quill.

You both embraced each other for a second before telling one another your sides of where you were and what happened to you in the snap. He informed you that he was a victim to it, alongside Drax and Mantis. You felt tears well into my eyes as he described what became of Gamora. You knew what they meant to each other, and it broke your heart to know he lost someone he loved again. You informed him of the five years it took to finally get everything in motion for the plan to work, and how risky it was going back in time to retrieve the stones.

“You’re a real life saver, you know that? I wouldn’t even be here if it wasn’t for you and your fellow teammates, what’s it called, Avengers? That what that guy in the getup called it?” Quill said jokingly.

You smirked at his ability to still find humor in horrible situations. “Yea, we’re the Avengers. It was a team effort, thank you for dropping in at the right moment, I literally thought I was going to die. As far as I’m concerned, we’re all Avengers now” you said nudging his shoulder lightly.

He shook his head in approval, “Hmm, that means I can add Avenger alongside Guardian of the Galaxy to my resume now” Quill said as he chuckled. But you sensed a heavy sadness weighing in on him.

You looked him up and down. “What’s going on with you, Quill?”

He paused for a moment, frowned and said, “Technically, Gamora is alive now but...”

You closed your eyes and nodded. The inter crossing of different timelines in quantum physics causes different timelines to be able to meet. You sighed and walked closer to him, “she’s not your Gamora, is she?”

Quill started to tear up. “She doesn’t know who I am, y/n. All those memories and moments we shared, gone. I thought if there was ever a chance to win this battle that I might somehow find her again, but... I still lost her.”

“I’m so sorry Quill” You embraced him into a hug.“But you still have a chance. She can be the Gamora you once knew, this one just hasn’t met you yet. In a way, you get to fall in love all over again.” You mentioned the silver lining in it.

He scoffed, “yea cause I’m sure after hitting me in the nuts, she’s totally ready for all my boyish charm and flirting.”

“Come on, no one can resist the charms of the likes of Peter Quill” You said playfully pushing him.

He smiled sadly, “yea, I’m sure you’re right. Just sucks all those moments are gone and forgotten.”

You pursed your lips, tears sliding down your face. “I understand, Peter. We all lost important people to too. I’m not sure how I can even go on without Natasha and Tony. She is one of the biggest reasons we were able to win, and we were so close. Now that she’s gone I... I feel so lost. And Tony, he had so much on the line but he still did it. We were all a big family, and now it will never be the same as it was before.”

Quill wrapped you into a long hug. “I’m so sorry for your loss. I fought alongside Tony when we tried taking down Thanos on Titan. He was so brave and brilliant, I am proud to have known and fought along side that guy, not once but twice.”

You and Quill stood side by side, watching all the survivors and studied the ruins from the fight. As I stood by Quill, you looked over to Bucky, who was talking to Steve and Sam. He gave you a smile, and gazed back at you with a heartfelt look. Quill noticed this look you two shared with one another.

“Anyone you want to introduce to me?” Quill said smirking.

You rolled your eyes playfully at him. “Yea of course, but later. I think we all need some time to adjust for a second.”

*Present*

You began to stir as you start to wake up. Glancing at the clock, it read 6:17 am. This is about the same time you keep waking up for the past few weeks. Mostly to call Quill, and due to time in space being so wacky, of course it was ass early on your end. You two agreed to call and video chat at least once a week. Ever since the battle, you sensed such sadness in him. You knew that you got lucky with getting your loved ones back, but still, you knew not everyone else did. Quill being one of them. The time with the Guardians were some of the best times in your life. They were the ones to bring you to Earth and find the Avengers, where you met your family, and of course, Bucky. You got a lot to thank them for. Of course you got especially close with Quill, due to your shared love of old music. You felt so awful for him since the last stand against Thanos and losing Gamora again, since you saw the beginnings of the love between Quill and Gamora blossom. You felt lucky to have witnessed the loving banter between them all, you could tell they were a family. So you know how much the snap must have scarred them. Quill has lost so much, they all have. The least you can do, is to be there as an old friend.

Before you got up, you glance down at the warm body in the bed next to you. Bucky. Your Bucky, sleeping peacefully. His long gorgeous hair strewn about on his pillow, with his head turned facing you as he snores quietly. The first week after the battle, it felt so strange. Not because everyone came back from the dead, but because things are so different now. That first week felt like being in a sort of strange limbo. But after that first week of adjusting, and finding a new place for an Avengers facility, things slowly got back to some kind of normal. Normal being that you and Buck could not keep your hands off each other. Five years is a long time to be without the love of your life. Everyone finally had to give you two an entire wing floor to ourselves because they kept walking in on both of you celebrating victory, well... everywhere and anywhere. It was so good to have him back to yourself. Feel his touches and kisses, his skin against yours, and to know that he is really and truly back. That it isn’t a sad nightmare, from the years before. You kiss his head softly, and rise from the bed.

You set up the communications device for a video call in the office room of our wing, and dial Quill’s current coordinates. Finally getting an answer the 3rd ring, and it was Rocket.

“Hey! Whattya know, it’s little Y/N! Looking for doofus?” He asked. You laugh and shake your head, “Hey Rocket, it’s great to see you too! Yea I am, is he in?”

“Is that Y/N? I’m here! I’m coming” You hear the voice of Quill in the background alongside loud crashes of him tripping over things. You say a quick hello to the rest of the gang, Mantis, Drax, Groot, Nebula, and the newest edition of Thor. It was great to see him taking the next step after the final battle. Finally, Quill appeared on screen.

“Bout time! Been waiting for awhile now for this call” Quill teasingly said. You scoff playfully, “My bad Pete, time is a little different here when you’re light years away.”

He laughed, and settled in a seat comfortably. “Alright kiddo, I finally got some down time. Shoot!” 

You rolled your eyes at his nickname. “You know we’re only a year apart right? Whatever, let’s get down to serious business!” you say clasping your hands together. Pulling out your phone, you make sure it connects to the blue tooth speaker and pull up a playlist. “Now, I know your fondness and love for 70′s music,” you begin. 

“A bond we both share” Quill said smugly. 

“Right, but I think it’s high and time to get a little caught up, because man, are you missing out on some underrated 80′s gems” you say, as the shuffled playlist started the song, Out of Touch by Hall & Oates. 

Peter began nodding his head, enjoying the beat and rhythm of the tune. Which soon turned into dancing, that you soon find yourself joining in with him. It was nice, to be able to just catch up and have fun and enjoyment with an old and longtime friend. It was a process, the start of finding the way back to normal. With Tony’s death and Steve’s retirement, normal seemed like such a long shot feeling that would never return. But it’s moments like these with Quill that help coax normal back into your life, and everyone else’s. 

So it became routine. At least once a week, or sometimes once every two weeks with Quill’s schedule as a Guardian, you would try to find time for these moments. Music moments for musical buddies, as he dubbed it. Even going as far to make Quill a send able playlist of the new music you are showing him. It truly was therapeutic for the both of you. Quill is truly one of your dearest friends, he means the world to you. You couldn’t wait for the right day to finally introduce him to Bucky.

*2 months later* 

Three weeks had passed since Quill was able to call. It worried you initially, but you were a part of the Guardians of the Galaxy for a brief moment. so you knew there was nothing they couldn’t handle. Still, you couldn’t help but worry for old friends. 

As you had them on your mind, you were also trying to relax on the couch with Bucky, for some quality time. The two of you were cuddled into each other, on the comfy couch, enjoying a movie together. There was finally a routine and normalcy between the two of you. In the first few weeks, it was the fresh shock of him coming back to you, which was only hours of rough and raw sex. Just to feel, actually feel him and knowing he was here with you again. After the shock wore off, it was the reality that settled in. Bucky was gone for five years. You had aged five years ahead of him while he was gone. You had to live for five years in a world without him. 

He notices your furrowed brow, and nudges you. “What’s troubling that beautiful mind of yours, darlin’?”

You jokingly frown and inform him. “Just thinking about how I actually aged and got super old as you were gone.”

Bucky gave his hearty laugh and kisses my hair. “Y/N, doll, I hope you know your five years still don’t got nothing on me.”

“Yea, but you still got your looks, Sargent.” You grumble. 

“Oh doll, you don’t look a day over 50″ he says with a sly grin. 

You softly and playfully smack his arm. He kisses your lips in return, and what starts as a small peck, deepens quickly. You twist your fingers into his long brown locks, as he pulls you onto his lap, while slipping his tongue in my mouth, which you gratefully grant him access to. You give a small hum of pleasure, as he begins to grind you down onto his crotch. He gives a small moan, and puts his hands on your hips to deepen his thrusts. The hot and heavy makeout session was about to escalate further, when the communication beacon signal turned on. Quill was finally calling. 

“God, as much as I want this to continue, you said, trying to not give in to the kissing and sucking Bucky was doing on your neck, do you mind if we take a 20 minute break? I gotta call to take.” 

Bucky smiles a devious smile. “Are you sure you want to postpone this? You can always call this Quail person back” he said as he continues to grind on my clothed groin. 

You frown at his hostility. He knows Quill’s name, you mentioned him before. “First of all, his name is Peter Quill, and second of all, it will just be 20 minutes tops, I swear. When I come back, I swear I will make it worth your while” You promise and wink at him before getting up from his lap. 

Bucky sighs in annoyance as you get up to answer Quill’s call. “Always run to that boyfriend’s beck and call, s’ept mine” he mumbles sourly. 

You stop in your tracks, before turning around. “What? Buck, you can’t be serious.”

He crosses his arms. “Just seems like he can get your time of day whenever he wants, and more often than not, I am put on the back burner for him.” 

Sighing, you turn to walk toward the beacon and shut the signal off. You would have to call Quill back later. After the signal turned off, you go to sit back on the couch with Bucky. 

“It really sounds like we need to talk. Do you want to go first? Tell me what’s been going on in your beautiful mind, Buck.” 

He gave a half grin, and puts his hand on your thigh. “Look Y/N, the last thing I want to be is controlling of you. Hell, I’d know you’d kick my ass if I tried to dictate who you can and can not talk to, man or woman. But this Quill guy, I barley know em’. Fought alongside the guy and I barley know him. But all the calls, the dancing and laughing, I know you know him well. I guess I just can’t help but feel jealous is all.” 

You sympathetically gaze at him, and put your hand on his that rested on your thigh. “That’s where my fault in this comes in. I should have told you Bucky, my history with Quill goes a long way back. Now, I just need you to listen for this part, can you do that for me please?” 

Bucky nodded and lovingly squeezes your thigh.

You turn to him and began your story. “You know how I mentioned I am originally from Earth, but lived in space with Quill, for the majority of my life?”

“Yes, of course. With the blue guy, and the thieven’ with Quill and all of em’.  You don’t forget a beautiful gal being from space, kind of” he says jokingly. 

You laugh and continue. “ The blue guy is Yondu, and yes, well, I also knew Quill here on Earth too. Our mothers were best friends, and in turn we became best friends too. I was born the year right after him, and then we were pretty much inseparable. He leaned on me a lot when his mom started to get sick, and I have always been there for him, and he has for me too. Then the night she died, I was there with him. I ran after him when he ran away, and that was when the both of us were abducted from our home here on Earth. Thus started our new lives together as thieves with the Ravengers. Soon after breaking from them and finding our other friends, Drax, Gamora, Rocket, Groot, Mantis, and Nebula, we formed our little outcast family of the guardians of the galaxy. Then you know the rest, I got separated in battle from them, and found myself here on Earth where I found Steve and The Avengers, which during that time was when he and Tony were fighting. Then that’s about where we first met, as you know.” 

Bucky looks you intensely in the eyes. “I didn’t know you two were childhood friends, I’m so sorry doll. I didn’t mean to be such a jackass.”

You kiss his cheek, and stroke his hair. “It’s okay Buck, I should have told you, But you also need to come to me if you’re ever feeling jealous or unsure, You can come to me for anything.” 

“Yes doll, of course” Bucky says. 

“The reason why I am so adamant on having these calls with Quill when I can, is because not only do I miss him and value the normalcy of our friendships in the aftermath of the battle, but because he lost someone he loved, except he can’t get her back.” You sadly remark. 

“What do you mean he can’t get her back? I thought the snap brought everyone bac-” Bucky began, but you cut him off. 

“Quill’s girl, Gamora, she was murdered by Thanos, not dusted. The way he killed her, it was irreversible. But with the time travel we did to bring everyone back, that time’s Gamora IS still alive, but she is not the Gamora we knew. All the memories she shared with Quill, with me, and the rest of them, they never happened. This Gamora doesn't know us, and I’m not sure if she wants to.”

You begin to tear up. “I watched them fall in love, Buck. I watched them fall for each other more and more each day. I saw as their stubborn big ego selves be too scared and unsure of their love for one another, and neither one of them admitting it till it was too late. We got lucky, Buck. We got our happy ending, and if Quill can’t find a way back to his, then maybe all the lame dancing and catching up with him can substitute as his till he finds what he needs.”

Bucky pulls me into a tight hug. “No need to explain anymore doll, I understand. I know the importance of being there for a true friend. Quill isn’t just your friend Y/N, he is your family. The same way Steve and Sam are mine. You’re right, we both did get so lucky in the end. I’m going to start appreciatin it more. I love you, darlin’.”

You smile into his hug. “I love you too, James.”

As you both stay there, and hold one another, the beacon begins to ring again. 

Bucky smiles at me. “I’ll let you get to it. Don’t leave him waitin too much longer.”

An idea pops into your head, before you go to answer it. “Say Buck, why don’t you come along? I think it’s high time my best guy meets one of the most important people in my life.”

He nods and smiles. “I would be honored, doll.” 

You hold out your hand to him, and he takes it as you two make your way to the communication device. You finally pick up on the 4th ring.

“Hey! There you are! You had me worried there for a second. I’m sorry I took awhile to call, its been a crazy three weeks and I can’t wait to tell you all about it- oh! Is this him?” Quill rambles on before noticing Bucky next to you. 

You giggle, and intertwine your fingers with Bucky’s. “Yea, Pete. This is my guy, and I think now is the right time for you two to finally meet.”

“About time Y/N! She goes on and on about you all the time, but here we are finally face to face, well as close as we can. Peter Quill is the name, or Star-lord to some, but nice to meet you, man” he introduces himself to Bucky.

You groan at his excessive need to be called his superhero name, and Bucky laughs. “James Buchanan Barnes, Mr. Quill. You can call me, Bucky” he introduced himself to Quill. 

“Oh c’mon now, Quill is fine. Anything really, for taking good care of my dear and oldest friend here. Emphasis on the old part” Peter joked. 

“Quill!” you yell. 

Bucky gives a deep laugh. “Same to you Quill, thank you for taking care of her for so long. I appreciate everything you have done for her.”

Quill smiles at the both of you. “I mean yea sure, she’s family to me and all of us. It’s nice to see she still has a great family down there on Earth, you two look really good together.”

You notice that he sadly looks down at your intertwined fingers, and realize he was probably thinking of Gamora.

Bucky took notice of his sad mood, and put the effort to change the subject. “So, now that we’ve met officially, got any embarrassing stories about Y/N and her days in space?” 

Quill lightens up at this prospect. “Oh man where do I begin! Maybe all the times she nearly got kidnapped during our days still as Ravengers, or how she threw a frickin hairbrush at an intergalactic giant alien monster- or hey, does she ever happen to still wear those Pac-Man feetie pajamas? I swear she wore them well after childhood.”

“Quill, I swear I’ll kill you!” you jokingly yell, as Bucky laughs hard at our bickering. As embarrassing as it was, you still feel your heart swell at the prospect of two of the people you care most for in this world finally met and got along. Normal was finally returning.  

     “       

[moe-lazyeye]

Hel vs. Odin (Botgd 1 material that is now technically a flashback due to lost threads)

The two deities crashed into one another, once again sending earthquake vibrations through the earth. Hel had been none too pleased getting tossed halfway across the continent, nor a fan of the swipe Odin had made at Haddock and Stonegit as a result. Now the two were back in the same place, fighting ferociously to end it all. 

Hel’s closed, three toed fists came up to slam repeatedly into Odin’s natural armor, the strikes scarcely causing the god to lose his step. Her opening attack had been good, but now things did not look so certain. Odin rose up on his back legs and fell down onto her hands, pinning them as his jaws came around to close on the back of her neck. “Ah, now ay see why yoo focus so eh’vaily on your use of trickery there girly.”

With a grunt her tossed her off to the side, and then struck her with his massive paw. “Aye ye may be strong...but meh shield’s don’t crack for anyhi’n. Snitchin souls and pullin tricks were all ye had for cultivating a hope of winnin ey?”    

Hel reeled as she was struck again. The last fight she had was with the witch monster, and her hands could fit around that things neck. Now she was doing battle with a member of her family that she was only half the size of. Her paws dug into the ground, creating great gorges and ravines in the earth. She spat once off to the side, and then bullied into him again, shoving him back a few paces. Odin snarled as he pushed back, feeling his feet shift, and then he hit her with a swing of his tusks. 

Hel hit the ground again, a gash in the side of her head. Odin reached down and grabbed her by the scruff. “Ya know I don like doin this lass...but all of ey rocked the boat. Ye thin I won take care of the souls? I know the mistakes we made. I’ll do better. Ya know the others aren’t cut oot for this. But what makes ey thin yed do any bettah than me?”

With a snarl Hel shoved away from him, throwing more punches which Odin blocked. ‘Because I know you! All of you and your idiotic clubhouse treatment of souls!’ Hel was momentarily hoisted up before getting slammed on the ground. She caught Odin’s following attack however, and got back up. ‘Oh hel’s so terrible. Hel is where all the bad people go. Well only because the rest of you lot would have just as soon tossed them away like dregs or pretended they didn’t exist! Face it! You’re elitist dicks! So of course I took all the people you deemed bad.’

Odin shook his head. “Ya can’t blame me for honorin tha brave lass…”

‘Oh yes I can!’ Hel snapped back. ‘You act like they aren’t part of us!’

An uppercut knocked Hel into a snapped, ridgid position and Odin plowed into her. “Well las I checked there...so were you lass…” He struggled with her. “Ye tricked me plenty but I saw yeh enough. The cocky attitude, the demands, the belittling. Why yer a right prick to those wee bastards.” 

Hel stared at him wide eyed, and then angrily got out from his hold, and threw another flat sounding punch into his blocking arm. ‘It’s not my fault they can’t read between the lines or see the big picture!’

“Eh...sounds like an exscuse ta be a bitch. Ya always liked acting like that Hel, ye said it yourself.”

‘Well that’s better than giving them enough details for them to exploit loopholes to an abhorrent level! Which is what you allowed your man to do!’

“We all cheated in our own way Hel...that’s just ow it was. But stay on point. I know ye were thinkin you were better than them.”

‘Well duh-!’

“Yeah well thin is I saw ye after that stunt with...les see...Greg yea? Ya got lectured by one of yer own wee souls in light of that fiasco. And ye could barely hold the tears back. A God put in place by a human.”

‘My pride isn’t fragile enough for that to hurt gramps.’ 

Odin leaned back with a serious look. “Aye, maybe not for what I said...but what they said to yeh fo sure.” 

He suddenly burst forward, one of his tusks catching her shoulder. “Ya thin I can’t see it?! How yer heart aches for them constantly!? How any word they speak against you stings, as if you’re a child?! How ye have no idea how to get through to them?” He shoved her back, beginning to beat Hel with his monstrous paws. “You act one way but yer heart is all in for those wee souls! But they’re gon hurt yeh! They gon defy yeh! Blame yeh! And only say it was for yeh when it was the exact opposite of what yeh instructed! Face it Hel, humans are fookin MEAN!”

Hel was once again thrown off to the side and Odin faced the battlefield. “I know how tah deal with it already Hel. Yer green...ya won get this right.”

‘They deserve...a better chance...than a mere sectioned out fate…’ Hel gasped, ink like blood trickling from her head and lips as she, once again, pulled herself back up. ‘I don’t know if I’ll get it right...but at least I’ll try...when I know you won’t. Rewards for the good...chances for the bad...the right to choose how they live that doesn’t involve a checklist a hoops just to avoid getting tossed into a cold black sea!’

“Like ah said...I’m gon do better.”

‘And equal...no...favorites…’

Odin paused, and then scoffed, his tusks beginning to glow with a warm, sunlight like power. “I won get into that with yeh...but lemme make another point instead.” He opened his mouth, a smiting blow beginning to charge and boil in the back of his throat. He looked down at the rebels. 

‘NO!’ Hel bellowed, blindly rushing forward and catching him around the neck. ‘I won’t let you harm them!’

Odin’s claws caught around her skull, blood flowing like rivers from the injury. He stared down at her with withering eyes, the charge still increasing in heat, and strength. “Ya see!? Yer not actin like this because me getting a bunch o ya souls with this blast will make me stronger and you weaker! Yer acting like this cause yer overly attached! Even a leader knows when to let go of a soldier who is going to pass in glorious and honorable battle!’

‘They’re not soldiers! They're not SOLDIERS!’ Hel weakly struck against him with her hands, her own blood nearly blinding her eyes as Odin gripped her head. ‘They not toys! Or buddys! Or disposable tools! They’re children they’re CHILDREN!’ Her hands came up, attempting to close Odin’s mouth, the pads of her paws starting to singe on the heat of his jaw and neck. ‘I…’ she stammered, almost with a whimper. ‘I can’t let you...they’re my babies…’

Odin looked down at her, set his jaw, and then, without another word, slammed her to the ground. With a roar he rolled her harshly, dropped onto all fours, and then thrust his tusks into her side.

Hel’s mouth opened in a wordless scream, her body going rigid stiff, and then she flattened onto the earth. Odin raised his body up to look down at her, and then tilted his head back with a roar. 

As the clash of the battle raged on below him, he turned to face it once more, the smite cooling in his throat. He waited to see the fighting falter, as it would in the event of a god’s death. He waited to see the rebellion souls become his own. His people had fought and served him well. Their bravery had enabled this victory.

The cries and ringing of steel continued…

And Odin frowned…

What is...this…?

The image of Haddock, fighting, believing, honoring the god he fought under flashed in his mind. A boy dressed in a green shirt lay blooded in the snow, he didn’t seem to like Hel a whole lot...but his faith…

Odin frowned deeper.

There was a small halfbreed missing her ears, and agent, fighting for all she was worth. Her father, a long time follower of his granddaughter. A leader, who disagreed, but was standing by her family. A traitor who changed his mind. An older man, who had read between the lines. They were all…

Holding her together!? 

He looked back at Hel’s still form, and saw her twitch. 

This isn’t even her full numbers! A comparable handful of souls is doing this much!?

One of Hel’s feet raised steadily into the air, and then pressed into the ground with a resolute grip. Coughing once with a stream of inky blood escaping her lips, Hel craned her head around to look at him. ‘Alright…’ She admitted. ‘So I go out of my way to be a dick. Even though I let my feelings get easily hurt. You were right about that...but don’t you see now...what I see?’

Odin looked in some bafflement between the rebels and Hel. He saw alright, but he didn’t understand. His numbers were greater. More power was going to him. And he knew for a fact that so many of the rebels detested Hel despite being contracted by her so… “But...” He managed to breath. “My soldiers...my numbers…”

‘Those men...are here for Valhalla…’ Hel breathed as she got up, clenching her fists. ‘But I have children...who are here…’ Her eyes flared as she surged forward. ‘For ME!’

Seeing the attack coming, Odin brought his arms, sending a surge of power into his natural, scalley armor.

Hel’s fist made contact, and then split Odin’s forearm, a great gash going straight down the middle. Odin bellowed as he reared backwards. WHAT!? HOW?!

He didn’t have time to deliberate the question rushing through his mind, as Hel came around again and socked him squarely across the jaw. The impact actually knocked the god off his feet and he rolled once before getting back up.”Hel!” He roared. “Ye cheatin again!” Odin caught her fist as he drew back his own. “I know ye are! You-!”

Odin’s head was shoved back as Hel smashed an open hand into his face, golden streams of blood flying from his nose. ‘No!’ Hel snarled at him, grabbing his tusks and bringing one of her knees up to strike him directly under his jaw. ‘No more games! No more lies! This...Odin!’ She drew back other hand and Odin hastily brought up his arms again. ‘Is the reality of faith!’

Odin bellowed as his arms were split apart from one another, and the fist slammed into him again. Now blood was in his eyes as well. His roar shook the ground as he locked hands with Hel. He attempted to pusher her back, shove her down, but she didn’t budge. “It can’t be! It isn’t!” He snarled. “It’s not how this works! Whether some are just here for my fields or not! You couldn’t have gotten this powerful from that handful I felt down there! There’s even someone, many someones, who don’t even like or believe in this fight at all! So why, how are you…” His rant began to slow, realizing that his arms were steadily getting pushed back, Hel’s gaze blazing into his. “Becoming...this...strong…”

‘Because.’ Odin gave an involuntary gasp as Hel’s grip began to crush his hands. ‘I realized...that no matter how much they may disappointment me, or hurt me. No matter how much I get wrong!’ Hel gritted her teeth, and slowly began to lift Odin off his feet. The older god’s leg scrambled at the ground, looking in wonder down at his granddaughter, his expression baffled. ‘They don’t need to believe in me! Because I, believe, in them!’ 

Odin let out another yell, and then his face was planted solidly into the earth with a mighty crash. Almost immediately he was hauled back up, and Hel proceeded to beat him to the brink of deliriousness. Her strikes were harder than anything Odin had experienced. Only the clamping jaws of Fenrir could have demonstrated greater physical might. His head snapped back and forth as Hel pressed into him, the great wounds in her sides still pooling dark blood around her feet. 

Faith in humans too...!? I’ve never hear...of such a thing...

Another strike, this one caused the eyes in his sockets momentarily roll from the impact. 

Could there really be so much to living in such a way...for a god?

His teeth rattled and he felt his form tipping over sideways.

But I believe in my soldiers too, they’re brave, they’re skilled!

Odin’s back hit the ground and Hel straddled him, raining fists down into his face in rapid succession. Then there was a twinge. Despite the pain of his body, Odin felt the pull in his heart. His whole army adored him as their leader. He adored them as his finest warriors. But he could feel the power and will radiating from Hel. It then clicked. At the end of it all...he was fighting for himself. Hel was fighting for them. He never would have imagined such a way would have yielded any results, much less this. 

The back of his head sank a little into the ground as Hel dropping another straight punch into him. “Eno-!” He choked out, interrupted by another strike. “Enough-!” He yelled again, fighting against her. But Hel pressed on, redoubling her attack. A glow warmed up in Odin’s throat as fury filled his system. “I- said- Enooough!” 

A streak of fiery sunlight erupted from his mouth, engulfing Hel where she stood over him. Hel withered against the flames, her form curling in on itself, but her hold on Odin’s neck remained. Odin’s eyes narrowed as he kept up the stream of fire, intent on driving her off, or desintergrating her. Skin peeling as burns spreading over her form, Hel leaned in, yelling angrily as her fist came up again. Eyes widening, Odin’s neck puffed out as he forced an explosive burst of the sunlight to burst out of his mouth like a cannon. The second before it hit though, Hel’s hand darted over, and slapped around one of his tusks. 

The blast threw Hel backwards, but her grip was true, and Odin was hurled forward before his tusk was forcefully ripped from his jaw. Roaring in pain as he slid on his belly in blood and soil, the cry faded from his mouth, and the battlefield went quiet. 

After several tense moment, Odin and Hel pulled their respective, mangled, forms back up onto their feet. They looked at each other from across the plain, and Hel slowly hung her head. Her skin looked light parchment, and blood seeped from nearly every place on her body. ‘I’m tired…’ she admitted.

Odin heaved great breaths of air, his jaw hanging loose, blood gushed from his mouth and his face was swollen. “So...am I...grandchild…”

‘And…’ Hel gulped, shaking her head. ‘Odin, I will never, ever let you win or have my babies. They’re mine.’

“Heh…” Odin chuckled. “Well...not all of them...not anymore. Although it looks like you got my head Judge-”

‘They will all!...be mine…’ Hel snapped, and the area went quiet again. 

Odin regarded her, and then gave a low exhale through his devastated nose. “I see...but…?”

Hel blinked thickly, hesitant with her next words. ‘But...but I don’t want to kill you grandpa. Not at all...and at least not today…’

Odin lowered his own head in thought, and then spat on the ground to clear his mouth for speech. “Neither do I little one...neither do I…”

Hel sighed. ‘Then it’s time for this day...to end…’

Odin nodded, letting his will to cease the fight to become known to his army while Hel did the same. “Some would call us fools...for not finishing what we started.” He observed the battlefield. He took note of how alarmingly well Hel’s rebels had done, not that the results of his own soldiers had been anything to sneer at. “We’ve both lost today…”

‘I think we can afford one last mistake of compassion...for family’s sake.’

Odin looked back at her to meet her eyes. For a moment, he understood where Hel was coming from, when it came to loving despite odds, and despite sense. “I think so too child…” There was a rumbling in the earth, and Odin’s mind recalled the image of the great wolf. He closed his eyes. “Goodbye granddaughter.”

Hel somehow knew that he meant it. ‘Bye gramps…’

And with that, the fighting came to a stop.

[buckyscrystalqueen]

Don’t Judge a Book By Its Cover

Pairings: Bucky x Reader

Warnings: Swearing, angst, fluff

Word Count: 7,556

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Silent tears fell from your eyes as you watched the security footage from December 16th, 1991. It was like a train wreck you didn’t want to look away from. A soft, squeaked gasp left your lips as you watched the Winter Soldier murder your father; your mom’s cries partially covering the crunch of his bones. The sound of your mother choking to death ripped through your heart.

“Play it again.” You said softly as the Winter Soldier grabbed the briefcase he had come for and drove off. Tony didn’t take his eyes off your 1 month old baby girl as he reached back and played the video again for you. You were only 8 when you lost your parents, 13 years younger than the only family member you had left after their mysterious deaths. You were raised by a nanny as Tony could barely take care of himself at that time. But unlike Tony, you sought help and by your early twenties, you had come to accept what had happened. Despite being heartbreaking, this just closed the last door for you.

“So this is the man that was the Winter Soldier?” You asked as you flipped the screen you were looking at over to live feed of the the jail cell like bedroom Bucky Barnes was in. You tapped the screen with your acrylic nail as you used your foot to push your sleeping newborn daughter back and forth in her stroller. Your older brother turned around and nodded.

“That would be the bastard.” Tony spat as he grabbed a chair and sat down next to you. You nodded as you studied the man. He was sitting in the middle of the bed, starring at the wall in front of him. He looked so lost and despite what you just saw him do, your heart broke for him.

“I though you said they cured him.” Tony rolled his eyes as you glanced over at him.

“Once a monster, always a monster.” You looked back at the live feed and shook your head.

“Tony, that’s not the same man...” You started.

“Oh, not you too.” You looked back at Tony as he got up from the chair angrily. “He killed mom!” You shushed him as you glanced at baby Brenna.

“Tony, you just told me they cured him because he was brainwashed. Would you say the same thing to Bruce after one of his Hulk fits?”

“(Y/N), this is totally different…” Tony said as he pointed at the screen to make a point but you interrupted before he could continue.

“Have you even tried to get to know him? Or are you condemning him before…”

“He killed mom!” You stood up quickly and pointed at the screen.

“This man didn’t kill mom! Reverse the situation and put Banner in his place. If Banner Hulked out and killed mom and dad and came back after as our Bruce, would you blame him? It’s the same Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde theory here, Tony…”

“You grew up without a mother because of that monster and you’re asking me to, what? Invite him to Thanksgiving dinner?”

“I’m asking you to get to know the person that was tortured…”

“That’s not happening, (Y/N).” He said as he crossed his arms over his chest. Knowing how stubborn your brother could be, you nodded and grabbed your phone off the desk.

“I’m not having this fight with you, T. I have bigger things to deal with.” You quickly tapped into the compound’s computer system and put in your own little hack to shut him out of the system for five minutes so you could get yourself and Bucky out before you locked the compound down. You looked up at your brother just before you enacted the hack and pointed at the monitor.

“I’ll be taking him with me” You said as you shut Tony out and unlocked the door to Bucky’s room. “Someone needs to give that man a chance.” Your brother shouted your name as you stepped through the door of his office and locked him in. You ran through the compound, pushing the stroller in front of you as you fought to keep Tony from overriding you. He may be smarter than you when it comes to science, but you were a better hacker in the long run. You knocked quickly and threw open the door to the room.

“Bucky Barnes?” The broken man looked up at you and nodded. You smiled at him and called him toward you with your finger. “(Y/N) Stark. You have about three minutes to come with me. I’m breaking you out of here.” The man leapt up off the bed and grabbed his jacket.

“Is Tony gunna be mad?” He asked as you both dashed through compound toward the front door behind your stroller. You laughed and nodded.

“Oh yea. But I’ll get the little sister forgiveness sooner or later.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Welcome home, Miss Stark. Mr. Stark has been attempting…”

“Yea, I know. Call him back, FRIDAY.” You called out over your daughters crying as you lead Bucky into your house. “Honey, there is a pink blanket on the rocker in that room. Can you grab it for me?” You asked as you pointed into the nursery on your way past. You kept walking toward the living room to get to your laptop and the phone as fast as you could.

“(Y/N)!” Tony roared from your phone in your living room. “The hell do you think you’re doing?!” You smirked to yourself as you dipped around the couch and set your car seat down on the coffee table.

“I think I’m trying to feed my daughter, Tony. I assume that’s what you’re supposed to do when they cry.” You remarked sarcastically as you picked Brenna up out of the car seat.

“Let me out of my room!” Tony screamed as Bucky handed you the blanket with a laugh. You shushed him as you threw it over yourself as a cover.

“Are you gunna try to come here to capture Bucky?” You asked, stalling for time so you could lock your house down before you let Tony out.

“You bet your ass I am! I don’t want him out of the compound, and I absolutely don’t want him around the only family I have left!” You made sure your daughter was latched on before you snapped at Bucky and gestured him toward you.

“Well, as a grown woman, I’m pretty sure I can make the call on who I associate with.” You said as you had Bucky stand with his back to your front door. You gestured for him to stay there as you continued. “And I am the only person that has a say on who can and cannot be around my daughter.”

“You don’t even know him!” Tony screamed as you ran a scan to catalog Bucky into your security system. This way, when you locked down, your house wouldn’t think he was an intruder that made it past your steel doors and lock you down in whatever room you were in if he moved around. The only way you’d be able to get out then was if Tony showed up.

“And locking him in a cage is the best way for anyone to get to know him.” You said as the scan finished. You walked back around your couch and pulled back a picture by the front door, revealing a hand scanner and retina scanner. “Tony, you and I both know…”

“I am in charge here!” Tony shouted as you reached over, grabbed Bucky’s hand, pulled him toward you and laid his palm flat on the scanner. “I’m the Avenger. I’m the one who knows the truth behind what that monster is capable of.”

“And you’re being narrow minded about it.” You said as you scanned the first hand and gestured for the metal one. “Look, what’s done is done. He’s gunna stay with me for a bit until you can cool down. Then he can come back to the compound and you can work out your issues.” You stood on your tiptoes as you pointed at the scanner. “Don’t blink.” You whispered to Bucky as you gestured his eyes toward the camera.

“(Y/N). Let me out of my compound and then we will talk about this.” You glanced back at your laptop screen and smiled at the green light that told you Bucky was added to your security program.

“If I let you out, are you gunna try to come get him?” You asked, knowing full well Tony was going to lie to you.

“No.” You nodded as you tapped Bucky and pointed to the chair by the fireplace.

“So you’re not gunna jump into a suit and fly here as fast as you can?” You asked as you sat down on the couch and glanced at your daughter under the blanket to make sure she was still latched on.

“Damn it, (Y/N)!” You smirked as you hit a couple keys and started the lock down of your house.

“Fine, you win. I’ll let you out.” You said as you looked up at the window of your living room. “But I can tell you now, I’m on internal lock down so…” Tony started shouting obscenities as the missile proof steel doors slid into place; encompassing your house from the ground to the roof in impenetrable steel. You hit a couple more keys as Tony continued to yell at you.

“OK, you’re free! Bye Tony.” You said as you reached over and hung up your phone. “FRIDAY, please ignore all incoming communications from Tony for the rest of the day.” You sat back in your spot with a victorious smile at the same time that Brenna stopped eating. “So, welcome to a little more freedom. Sorry I had to move you from one cage to another but I promise, this is only temporary.” Bucky looked over at you as you leaned back against the couch and laid Brenna across your chest.

“Is her dad going to be mad I’m here?” He gestured to your daughter and you shook your head.

“She doesn’t have one. Long story short, ever since Tony became Iron Man, I have almost lost him a dozen times. He’s the only family I have and the idea of being alone was just overwhelming. So I did the whole sperm donor thing. Took a few years but I wouldn’t trade it for anything.” Bucky nodded and you looked down at your pride and joy with a smile as she spit up on the blanket with a small burp. You wiped her mouth and wrapped her in a clean blanket from your diaper bag.

“How old were you?” Bucky asked softly. You looked up at him and gave him a small smile. You knew what he wanted to know and you knew it would tear through him to hear the answer.

“I was eight.” Just like you expected, the news hit him hard. He let out an audible choked gasp and you shook your head. “Don’t. I know it wasn’t you. I wouldn’t have locked you in my house with my one month old daughter if I thought it was. I won’t tell you not to beat yourself up for it because I can already tell you are going to but move past it.

You are not that… thing any more. Now, you just have to figure out who you are. I believe you are gunna have a better chance of doing that here over at the compound especially if you are around something positive that came out of a tragedy the Winter Soldier caused.” You got up from the couch and walked over to Bucky with a smile as you shifted your daughter in your arms.

“If brainwashed you hadn’t killed my parents, essentially I wouldn’t have had Brenna.” You said softly as you moved his metal arm into a cradle and laid Brenna down in it despite his attempts to protest. You took a step back and handed him the spit up blanket with a smile. “You got it. She’ll sleep until she poops and then she’ll sleep again once she’s changed until she’s hungry again. Circle of life for a baby. I planned on making sandwiches for lunch, that OK?” You could see tears rolling down his cheeks as he nodded his head. He brushed his fingertip across her cheek as he sat back in the chair; his eyes glued to the little girl. For the first time in seventy years, Bucky didn’t see his metal arm.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Sorry about all the bells and whistles, Steve.” You said as you guided your guest into your house. “Keeping Bucky away from my brother is proving to be tricky.”

“Yea, I can see that.” Steve said with a laugh as he glanced into your living room. “Where is…?”

“It’s nap time.” You said as you gestured for him to follow you. You both walked quietly down the hall to the guest bedroom and paused in the doorway. Bucky was laying at an angle across the bed with Brenna tucked protectively against his chest behind his metal arm. Even though neither you nor Steve made a sound and you were at least 30 feet away from the bed in the massive bedroom, Bucky’s eyes flew open when you stopped in the door way. His metal arm shifted on the bed as a protective shield as he took a moment to figure out who was walking into the bedroom before he relaxed.

“She’s his saving grace.” You said softly as Bucky glanced down at Brenna while he slowly sat up to make sure he didn’t wake her up. He made sure he was completely up right before grabbing a swaddling blanket to move her into the nursery. “He’s been here three weeks and I don’t think she has left his sight once.”

“He was like that with his little sister, too.” Steve said as Bucky tucked Brenna into a swaddle like you had taught him and picked her up. Your daughter fussed a little bit at being moved as Bucky laid her on his shoulder but she settled down instantly when he started to sing softly to her. You smiled as he came over and nodded to his friend.

“Well there’s something you don’t see every day.” Steve teased as you moved past him to head out to the living room.

“What?” Bucky asked as he pointed Steve into the nursery. Steve laughed as you went back out to your living room to go back to work; Stark Industries wasn’t running itself with Pepper on a long ‘temporary’ leave and you in hiding. You caught the rest of the conversation on the baby monitor on the side table.

“You with a baby. I gotta tell ya, I never thought I’d see the day.” Bucky laughed over the soft creek of your changing table.

“Shut up, punk.” Bucky said to his friend as he changed Brenna. You smiled to yourself as you partially tuned out their conversation.

“So what are you doin’, Buck? You gunna come back to the compound soon? We can start training together again; maybe I can show you a thing or two this time around.” Steve teased.

“I don’t know, Steve. Being here… it just makes sense to me right now. Did you know, (Y/N) said this baby wouldn’t be around if it wasn’t for me killing her parents? Wait, not me, the Winter Soldier; my therapist says I have to separate the two. (Y/N) showed me that this is something good that came out of my torment. And she’s been helping me with all the shit swimming in my brain, I talk to my therapist once a day and (Y/N) is… man, Steve, she is amazing. She’s smart and kind and beautiful. She was right, I’m better trying to find myself here than in whatever jail cell Tony has me in.” You stopped working and sat back a bit on the couch with a small smile on your face as Steve hummed in response.

“Well I’m glad you’re making a progress. I stand beside you one way or another. I just don’t think Tony’s going to be OK with you claiming this as your home…”

“It’s not his choice.” You called out as Bucky and Steve walked out of the nursery. You turned around on the couch to look at them and pointed at the baby monitor as you continued. “This is my house. Like I told my brother, I make the decisions on who lives here and I make the call on who is around my daughter. Yes, I listen to him sometimes but I’m way more level headed than he is. If Bucky wants to stay, he stays. He’s been told what to do for years. It’s his chance to make his own choices. Not Tony’s.” Bucky pointed at you in agreement as he sat down in his chair by the fireplace and laid Brenna on his chest.

“Hey, I’m not telling him what to do. I learned as a kid you couldn’t tell that man what to do.” You giggled as you settled into your spot on the couch and crossed your legs.

“Well, while I didn’t know him back then, I can tell you now. I tried to tell him he didn’t have to carry that baby around all the time. That lasted about two hours before he picked her up again. I just gave up on tellin’ him.” You smiled over at Bucky who flushed red and looked down at Brenna to hide his face behind his long hair. “I will have to say though, I love my kid but having him around is a Godsend when I’m working. I used to find myself jumping up at every little noise she made but now, I hardly notice I have a kid unless she wants to be fed.” Steve nodded as he looked over at his friend. Bucky was once again watching Brenna sleep as he lightly brushed his fingertips up and down her back.

“It’s just been a long time since I have seen something so perfect.” Bucky said softly as he brushed his fingers across her soft brown hair with a smile.

~~~~~~ 5 YEARS LATER ~~~~~~~

“Uncle Tony!” You smiled at your little girl as she ran toward your brother with her arms wide open. Tony stopped in your living room and feigned a look of shock as he looked at his niece in her Cinderella dress. You had to wonder how a kid could have so much energy at 4 am.

“Who is this little princess? Surely it’s not my little Brenna!” Tony bent down and stuck his arms out at the same time that your 4 year old daughter launched herself into his arms with a squeal. “God, when did she get so big?” He asked as he glanced over at you with a smile. You laughed as you set your backpack down in the living room.

“You saw her last week.” You teased as you gave your brother a hug. “So are you ready for Disney?” Your daughter cheered right in Tony’s ear and he cringed.

“Not at all.” Tony laughed. He glanced over at the sound of a suitcase hitting the doorframe of your bedroom.

“Jesus baby doll, what did you pack?” Bucky asked as he held up your 50 pound suitcase like it was a feather and looked at it. You shrugged as he looked over at you.

“Not enough shoes.” He rolled his eyes as he looked over at your older brother.

“Hey, Tony. How are y…”

“Bucky.” Tony spat as he turned his back on your husband and put Brenna on the floor. “Let’s go get your bag, princess.” Your daughter ran down the hall to her room with a laugh and you whacked your brother’s arm hard as he passed.

“Not this week. It’s your niece’s birthday.” You hissed as you looked at him. He simply rolled his eyes and headed toward your daughters room. You sighed and looked over at Bucky with a weak smile. “You know he’s stubborn.” You said as he grabbed your backpack and slung it over his shoulder.

“It’s been five years.” He said as he looked at you. You nodded as you wrapped your arms around his waist.

“Yea, but he doesn’t see the man that I do.” He sighed and rested his forehead against your.

“Keep me sane this week, OK?” You nodded as he gave you a chaste kiss.

“So are we ready to go to Disney?” Steve asked as he walked into your house with a sleepy smile. You smiled as you pulled away from Bucky and looked at him.

“Ask the birthday girl. We haven’t heard anything but Disney since someone gave away the surprise.” You called out at your brother as he came down the hall with Brenna’s bag in one hand and your daughter held upside down in the other. He looked at you with mock innocence and shrugged.

“I don’t do secrets well, you know that.” You rolled your eyes as you grabbed your purse and your park bag off the couch.

“You’re such a pain in my fucking ass.” You told him as you followed Bucky out the front door to the Quinjet.

“Ooo! Daddy, mommy said a bad word!” Brenna called out between her giggles as Tony followed after you. Steve grabbed her from Tony and swung her up onto his shoulders.

“That’s a quarter word, mommy.” Bucky said as he headed up the ramp.

“Mommy put ten dollars in at the beginning of the week.” You said as you dropped your bags behind the netting on the side.

“What word did you say?” Nat called out from the pilot seat. You looked at her with mock annoyance as you pulled out the net to help Bucky and Tony put the suitcases behind it.

“The F word.” You told her with a roll of your eyes. She nodded as she turned back to the dash and closed the ramp.

“Yea, that one gets me too.”

“I’m gunna fly with Auntie Nat.” Brenna said as she tried to wiggle out of the seat Steve was putting her in.

“Is that how we ask?” Bucky asked as he grabbed a seat and looked at his daughter. She sighed, ever the drama queen and looked at Natasha.

“Please?” Nat said yes with a laugh as you grabbed a seat next to Bucky.

“Such attitude, missy.” You said as your daughter ran up to sit on Natasha’s lap. Tony laughed as he grabbed a seat on your other side.

“She’s a Stark. Of course she’s gunna have an attitude.” You nodded in agreement as Steve took a seat in the co-pilot seat and Brenna and Nat lifted the Quinjet into the air to head to Orlando, Florida.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

“The castle!” Brenna screeched as she jumped up and down between Steve and Bucky, her little hands held in theirs. “Daddy, look!” She giggled as the six of you headed down empty Main Street for breakfast before the park opened.

“I see it, princess. That’s where we are having breakfast.” Brenna dead stopped in the road and looked up at him with her blue eyes wide in shock.

“Like a real princess?” He nodded as he picked her up and put her on his shoulders with a smile.

“Just like a real princess.” She cheered; throwing her hands up in the air as her long, light brown hair fell down her back. The moment was captured forever with the simple click of your camera.

“You did good, kid.” Tony said softly as you took another picture of Nat and Steve walking hand in hand with the castle in the background of the picture.

“I couldn’t have done it without you. All of you.” You glanced over at your brother. He sighed as he draped his arm over your shoulder.

“How am I supposed to just pretend I’m OK with this?” He asked after a moment as he pointed at Bucky’s back. Your husband had switched from carrying his daughter on his shoulders to playing an impromptu game of hide and seek around a short Indian statue. You shrugged as you took a picture as Natasha snuck up and tagged Bucky before darting off and grabbing Brenna’s hand so the pair could go ‘hide’.

“You have to give him a chance, Tony. I’ve been telling you that for years. See that he’s not the monster you keep telling yourself he is.” You pointed at Bucky as he pretended to look for the girls with Steve. You smiled and took another picture of them and the girls where they were hiding behind a tree. “Does that look like the same man that killed mom?” Tony sighed as he watched the two men jump onto the curb and tickle the girls, causing them to scream laughter and run off again.

“I just can’t get that video out of my head when I look at him.” He said as the two of you watched Brenna look for her daddy and Uncle Steve behind a trash can. You took one more photo of the surprised look on your baby girl’s face when Bucky popped out at her before looking at Tony.

“That, big brother, is something I can’t help you with. But you need to let this hate go. It’s over, Tony. Talk to Bruce. Or I’ll give you the name of my therapist…” Tony scoffed as Brenna came running over and hid between your and Tony’s legs.

“Don’t tell Uncle Steve I’m here.” She said as she held on to one of each of your legs as you walked down the road. You paused and looked down at her with a big smile.

“Brenna, why don’t you want me to tell Uncle Steve you’re hiding behind mommy?” Steve came out of no where and grabbed Brenna.

“I got the princess!” He shouted as he tossed her up in the air. She squealed with laughter as he caught her in his arms. He gave her a kiss on the cheek before putting her back on the ground. “Come on, you two. We gotta find Auntie Nat before breakfast and you guys are slacking.”

“And daddy, too!” Brenna said as she took off to find the other two people in your party with a laugh with Steve’s fingers clutched tightly in her hand. You looked over at your brother and laced your arm with his.

“Just let it go for this week. We’re here for Brenna.” He nodded as the two of you watched Steve and Brenna find Bucky. You saw Nat’s red hair out of the corner of your eye and a smile spread across your face. “Come on.” You grabbed Tony’s arm and pulled him off toward Nat to keep up the little game of hide and seek in the last few minutes before your breakfast reservation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Daddy…” You looked down at your daughter and could tell just by the look on her face and the tone of her voice that she was about to have a melt down. You couldn’t blame her; you had been at the park all morning and she was ready for a nap. “… I wanna get on the ride!” You smirked as Brenna dissolved into tears in the middle of the line for the Little Mermaid. Bucky instantly picked her up and propped her on his hip.

“Princess, we have to wait our turn like everyone else.” He said softly as he looked at you for direction you never gave. It was only the three of you from your party in the Fast Pass line at the moment; the other members of your group had opted to ride the Snow White Mine Train instead of Little Mermaid for the third time that day. “We’re almost there.”

“But I wanna go now!” She sobbed as she bashed her face on his shoulder dramatically. He smiled as he brushed his metal fingers through her hair.

“Brenna, I would love to let you go now but we have to wait. We have to be fair to everyone else who wants a turn, too.”

“Nu uh!” She cried; her voice muffled by his shoulder and her sobs. You looked up at your husband as the two of you moved up a little more in the line.

“It’s nap time.” You said with a laugh and he nodded in agreement. Brenna wailed even louder at the word ‘nap’ and Bucky turned his head toward her ear.

“Brenna, cry with your eyes, not your mouth.” He told her as you moved up a bit more in line. “You know you don’t get your way faster when you cry like that.” She buried her face in his shoulder and cried harder, but the sound was now almost minimal. “You know, with all that crying you’re doing, your missing how close we are to the front.” Brenna didn’t stop crying as she turned her head to look at the front of the line as you walked up a little more. She moved her face back into his shoulder as her crying turned to simple sniffles. “You gotta stop crying if you wanna get on the ride. You don’t wanna scare off the fishes.” She nodded her head in agreement but didn’t move her face.

“Man, I gotta know how you do that.” The man standing behind you in line said. You and Bucky both turned and looked at him as he looked down at his son that was about the same age as Brenna. By the look on the boys face, he was at the same point of the day that Brenna was.

“He’s the baby whisperer.” You said as you continued up in line. “I can say the exact same thing to her and she wants none of it. She’s just daddy's little girl.”

“Can I trade you husbands?” The woman joked. You laughed and shook your head.

“Even if I agreed to it, you’d have to fight our daughter for her daddy. He’s all hers.” The woman nodded in understanding as you finally moved to the front of the line.

“You have a beautiful family.” With a smile and a thank you, you were shuffled into one of the clam shells for the ride. Bucky slid in first and sat Brenna down next to him and by the time you slid in next to them, your daughter had fallen asleep against his side.

“So you would trade me for another husband?” Bucky teased as he twisted a little so Brenna could sleep more on his stomach and not his ribs. You smirked as you reached over and laced your fingers with his metal fingers.

“I would never, ever consider giving you up.” He smiled as he pulled your hand over and kissed your fingers. He tilted his head a bit and pointed at Brenna.

“Think you’d wanna do this again?”

“What? Ride Little Mermaid with our sleeping daughter?” His face dead panned as he gave your hand a little squeeze. You giggled and nodded. “Have another baby with you? Absolutely.” His face lit up instantly.

“Really?” You nodded again as you played with his fingers.

“Of course. You’re an amazing father, Bucky. If you wanna have another baby, I’m on board.” His smile got impossibly bigger as he kissed your fingers again.

“I love you.” He said as he continued to kiss your fingers since he couldn’t get to your lips at the moment.

“I love you, too.” You reached your finger up and brushed it along his nose as you tilted your head to the side. “You’re not carrying this one around the house with you all the time, you hear me?” You joked. Bucky bit your finger gently and growled in response.

“You can’t tell me what to do.” He said as he let go of your hand at the end of the ride. You hummed and nodded as you pointed to Brenna.

“Carry her back to the hotel for me.” He rolled his eyes as he picked up his baby girl and exited the ride after you.

“OK, so you can’t always tell me what to do.” He said as he leaned over and gave you a kiss. You laced your fingers with his and headed out of the ride to find Tony, Steve and Nat for a mid-day break.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Where’s Bucky?” Steve asked as you walked out onto the private deck of your bungalow at the Polynesian resort. You pointed over your shoulder with your thumb as you closed the back door behind you.

“Making sure Brenna is comfortable. I know that man loves me but I swear, he loves her more.” You joked as you walked down the stairs into the plunge pool with Nat and Steve. Your brow furrowed. “Where’s Tony?” The words had barely left your mouth when Tony in his Iron Man suit landed on the deck behind you.

“What did I miss?” You looked over at your brother as he stepped out of the suit in his bathing suit like it was no big deal and rolled your eyes.

“Really? The suit?” He shrugged as he walked into the pool as Bucky walked out onto the deck from the living room.

“Didn’t wanna walk all the way over here.” Tony said as he propped his arms on the wall behind him in the corner of the pool.

“It’s like, right there!” Nat said as she pointed toward the main hotel.

“That’s is what you get for refusing to stay here with us.” You said as you sat down on Bucky’s lap on the stairs of the little pool next to Steve and Natasha on the bench seat.

“Yea, well I’m not sleeping on a sofa bed.” Tony said as he hit a few buttons on his watch and collapsed the suit to the size of a suitcase. You shook your head as you grabbed two of the drinks Nat had made and lined up on the side of the pool and handed one to your husband.

��So, um… did you get the castle room settled for tomorrow night?” Bucky asked tentatively. You looked at your brother with your eyebrows raised, knowing he wanted to ignore Bucky’s existence like he usually did. Tony sighed and looked over at Bucky.

“Yes, the castle has been confirmed.” He kept eye contact with Bucky for a moment before looking over at Nat and Steve. “I love how I make the donation and I don’t even get a chance to stay in the room.”

“Because you totally wanna spend the night in Cinderella castle.” You said sarcastically as you squeezed Bucky’s hand under the water. Getting a reaction from Tony at all was progress for Bucky. Usually, you had to whack your brother or re-ask the question for him to get an answer.

“I mean, who wouldn’t?” Nat said as she looked over at you. She and Steve gave you the same knowing look as Tony grabbed the last drink off the side of the pool.

“Even I wanna see the room.” Steve said as he looked over his shoulder at the castle in the distance. “But then again, this entire park blows my mind. It’s amazing how much I missed in the ice.” He said as he absentmindedly dragged his fingers across Natasha’s stomach.

“I second that.” Bucky agreed. “I have to admit, having a kid is great when it comes to a 102 year old coming to Disney World. I don’t think I would have enjoyed this as much without ours.” Steve verbally agreed as Tony rolled his eyes.

“She’s not your kid.” He said, partially under his breath, without thinking.

“Tony!” Nat shouted. In the blink of an eye, you reached out an slapped your brother across the face. He looked at you indignantly and you simply stared at him in shock. You shook your head as tears welled in your eyes.

“How dare you. He is absolutely her father and she is his daughter. You know good and well he adopted her the day he signed our marriage license. I’m sorry you can’t seem to get your fucking head out of your ass to see that. But if you can’t even be civil, I don’t want you here or near my family again. It’s been five fucking years, Tony. Five. Get over it already because I’m done. I’m absolutely done.” You stood up off Bucky’s lap and took his hand as you got out of the pool. You wiped the tears off your cheeks as you headed toward the door, but you paused and looked back at your brother.

“Just so you know. If it hadn’t been for you, he would have been her biological father, too. And yea, we do plan on having more. I was basically alone my entire life; that’s why I had Brenna. If you have such a problem with the decisions I make with my life and our daughters life, maybe you should have been around to raise me instead of letting a fucking nanny do it. He stepped up to be a father when he didn’t have to and he knocked it out of the park. When I needed a parent, the only family I had left me with a nanny because drinking and pussy were more important to you. You’re the last person to say who is and isn’t a father.” You pulled open the door to the bungalow at the same time Brenna sleepily walked out of the bedroom.

“Mommy, why are you yelling?” You shook your head as you walked over and picked up your baby girl.

“I’m sorry, honey. Mommy just got a little mad.”

“How about we watch a movie before we go to dinner with Auntie Nat and Uncle Steve?” Bucky said as he closed the bedroom door behind the three of you; effectively drowning out the shouts of the three people out on the deck still in the pool. Brenna nodded as you set her on the bed while Bucky grabbed two towels.

“Mermaid?” Brenna asked softly as she laid down on the pillows, still waking up from her partial nap. You nodded as you pulled up the free movie listings and scrolled through to find her favorite. After a moment, Bucky reached over and took the remote from your shaking hands.

“Go take a shower.” He said softly with a gentle look as he turned on the movie. You looked up at him and dissolved into tears.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” You said as he pulled you into his chest. He told Brenna you’d both be right back as he walked you backwards out of the room and into the bathroom next door. He picked you up, stepped into the shower and turned on the water. You could feel him tense at the blast of cold water a second before the cold spray hit your legs.

“It’s not your fault, doll.” He said softly as he set you down in the shower. He kept one arm wrapped around you, holding you to his chest as the other fiddled with the water temperature. You nodded weakly as you held onto his waist. He took a half step to the side so you could get hit with the warm water as well as he wrapped his arms around your shoulders. With a heavy sigh and a few tears of his own, he rested his chin on the top of your head. You both just stood in the shower spray and forced yourselves to let the water spray wash away the pain.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

You sat in the plunge pool late that night as Bucky tucked Brenna in for bed. You couldn't stop the ache in your chest at your brother's words. You knew Tony didn't like Bucky but to tell your husband of 4 years, the man that raised your baby girl that he wasn't a father? It was heartbreaking. You heard the door open behind you and you stood up and waited. Without a word, Bucky got into the pool, took a seat on the little bench and pulled you back on to his lap.

“I feel like I’m losing part of my family.” You said softly as you pulled his arms around you. “But I can't keep doing this anymore.” Bucky nodded with his chin on your shoulder.

“I love you, (Y/N), but the next time he tells me I’m not a father, I will kill him.” You nodded in understanding as he kissed your shoulder.

“I'm sorry, Bucky. I thought he could change.” Bucky shook his head as he rested his chin back on your shoulder.

“You don't have to be sorry, doll. It's not your fault your brother is an asshole.” You huffed a humorless laugh and nodded as you leaned your head against his. You sat there quietly for a while and stared at the castle in the distance as your fingers dragged up and down the metal ridges of Bucky’s arm.

“What am I supposed to do here?” You asked. Bucky shook his head as his arms tightened just the slightest bit around you.

“You don’t want my answer.” Your brow furrowed as you moved in his lap to look at him. With a deep sighed, knowing you weren’t gunna drop this, he put his hands on your hips and spun you around so you were straddling his lap. “I can’t do this with him anymore. I’ve tried for five years, doll and I’m at the point where even seeing his face makes me want to kill him. He’s a monster on missions, he’s tried to get me killed a few times, and now he’s hurting my wife day in and day out… I can’t take it anymore.

I’ve been civil for you, but for him to continually attack my fatherhood.” He shook his head and licked his lips. “I love you, (Y/N) but I don’t want him near my girls anymore. Because next time he says some of the things he’s been saying to you or me…” His sentence trailed off and you nodded, knowing exactly where he was going. Tears stung your eyes as you wrapped your arms around his neck and buried your face in his neck. He held you close as you cried.

“Why does he have to be such an asshole?” You sobbed. Bucky shook his head and hugged you tighter.

“I wish I could give you an answer, doll. I really do.” You tightened your arms around his neck, so grateful that you had him in your life. “Hey, how about after Disney, we go on a long vacation. Pepper can handle the company without you and Brenna’s not supposed to start kindergarten until September so we have like 8 months.” You nodded in agreement as you sat back and looked at him. He gave you a weak smile as he brushed away your tears with his thumbs.

“You and Brenna are the best things that have ever happened to me.” You said softly as you ran your fingers through his hair. He smiled as you moved your hands to his scruffy jaws.

“I could say the same thing about you two as well.” He moved his hands forward on your hips and brushed his thumbs across your stomach. “Maybe our saving grace right now could be number two?” You laughed and nodded as you put one of your hands on his and moved it to the middle of your stomach.

“What do you think, boy or girl?” He shrugged as he rubbed his hand against your flat stomach.

“Another girl. I’d be the luckiest man in the world with three girls.”

“That’s a lot of boyfriends to be scaring off.” You teased with a smile. Bucky lifted his arms out of the water and looked between the massive muscle on his right and his metal left arm. He looked back at you with a laugh and shook his head.

“I don’t think I’ll have a problem there.”

“Lookin’ a little flabby there, baby.” You joked as you poked at his arm with a smile. He tickled your sides and you yelped. He wrapped his arms around you to keep you to him as he continued to tickle you.

“Flabby? Did you just call me flabby?” He asked as he flexed his muscles around you. You laughed and poked at the back of his hips.

“Look at these love handles!”

“You’re so mean.” He said as he grabbed hold of your hips and pretended to move you away. You quickly wrapped your arms and legs around him.

“No!” You whined as he scooted forward on the bench seat to give your legs a little more room. “I don’t care if you’re fit or flabby, I still love you.” He grabbed your hips and pulled them forward toward him.

“Good. Because you’re stuck with me. No matter what happens.” You nodded as you leaned forward and gave him a gentle kiss.

“Thank God for that.” You said softly against his lips.

[topazshadowwolf]

The Door (chapter 8)

An Undertale Fanfiction by: Topaz Shadowwolf Undertale is owned by: Toby Fox Setting: Post neutral run when Papyrus dies with chapter intros being before the child fell. Relationships: Sans and Toriel is the main focus, with a little bit of Undyne and Alphys Rating: I’m thinking Teen? Heads up: There is some depressed thoughts, feelings of worthlessness/wanting to die, mention of major character death, and the occasional bad word. Oh, and flowey being flowey, so you know, psychological/physical trauma. I really don’t want to say much more since I really don’t want to spoil anything further down the road…

You can read it on AO3! Here is  Ch 7 Ch 6 Ch 5 Ch 4 Ch 3, Ch 2, and Ch 1 on Tumbler.

Random thoughts from the writer about this chapter:   HERE! Take it! If I look at it again I will just end up adding more to it.

The Door

Chapter 8: Watch Your Step

He was crazy for doing this. She won't be there, why would she? It is late, and she is most likely in bed, sleeping, like a normal person. And yet… And yet he felt he needed to try. He had to try. No, that’s not right, he didn’t need to. He just wanted to.

           Sans paced in the snow in front of the door, “i should just go back home and not bother her.” He then stopped and looked at the oversized double doors. Why were they that big anyway? He heard some monsters used to be a lot larger in the past, before being trapped underground. But he never figured any of them grew that large. Were they meant to impress someone? And in that case, who?

           With a sigh, he turned ready to head back home. Coming here was a dumb idea. No sooner did he take three slow steps away did he turn around and walk back. He knocked on the door, “knock knock?” He asked, though it came out sounding more like a plea. How desperate could he sound. Sans sighed, “never mind, it's stupid. you’re sleeping like you should be; like i should be. heh, but you see that’s the thing, i can’t. not tonight. i tried and failed because the dream i had when i… well, it was bad.”

           A bitter chuckle surprised him, and he noticed it was coming from him, “here i am, talking to a door. i’m such an idiot to even consider doing this. and yea, i know, you asked me not to talk bad about myself but the fact is i am.”

           “No your not,” Came a soft reply from the other side, which startled him and he stumbled back.

           “lady? ah geez, please tell me i didn’t wake you,” Sans rubbed his head, feeling bad now that he finally heard her voice.

           “You didn’t, my sweet friend. I was upstairs reading when I thought I heard something and came to check. And I’m glad I did. What’s wrong?”

           “uh,” he paused, unsure if he wanted to say now that she was here. It felt pathetic coming to someone because of a bad dream. Everyone gets nightmares. Though he gets a lot of them, and they are getting worse. The frightening thing about them is he knows that they aren’t really nightmares, they are more than that. But still, he didn’t want to burden her.

His foot shuffled in the snow as he thought of what to say. She was giving him time, clearly, as she has yet to say something about how long he was taking to reply. His body trembled a little before he shrugged, “it’s nothing, really, just not sleeping well.”

           ‘Sans, you idiot. You come to her for support and then back down. Why the are you even here?’ he berated himself while sighing and rubbing his head.

           “Oh, well, we can talk until you are ready to try sleeping again.”

           “uh, thing is,” when will he be ready to sleep again? Sans shifted nervously, “i’m not sure how long that will be.” He cursed under his breath and leaned his head against the door with a soft click, “i’m sorry, i shouldn’t be bothering you with this. i’m sure you’ll be ready to go to bed soon yourself. i don’t want to keep you up.”

           “A-actually…,” She said quietly. Her voice was heavy, sadness weighing down the usual happy tone he loved to hear. Within his ribcage he felt his soul ache as he desired nothing more than to hug her.

           “what’s wrong?” He placed his hands on the door, as if trying to get as close to her as possible.

           She was silent for a moment then she sighed, the heavy sadness still there “I am being haunted by bad memories tonight and I won't be getting any sleep.”

           That was something he could relate with, and he closed his eyes. When he spoke his voice was strained by a lump in his throat, “want to talk about it?”

           “If you don’t mind listening,” She said softly.

           “of course i don’t,” Sans was able to say with more ease than before.

           From behind the door he could hear the lady move and he heard a tapping, “Could you sit around here?” She was quiet while he moved to where she had tapped. Before he started to sit she said, “I know we can’t really, but, it would be nice to think we are sitting side by side.”

           After situating themselves, and making sure they were facing the same direction Sans wondered for a moment then asked, “when you lean on the door, where does your head come to?”

           “Right here,” She replied tapping on the door. He looked up, hearing the sound above him and he grinned weakly.

           His skull clunked against the door and he tapped where it was, “i’m here.” Why did he have to be so short? “anyway, if you’re ready, i’m all ears,” that was a good pun, shame she won’t get it since they were keeping who and what they are a secret.

           “I was thinking of one of the human children that passed through here many years ago. Her name was Shaniqua. She was the sweetest and most patient child one could ask for. A beautiful girl with her dark skin and eyes that glowed with compassion.” She then sniffled before sighing, “To think, someone hurt her, abused her, before she fell down here because she was different than them. They thought her less than them and treated her as such… she had scars...” She sobbed, her voice full of anguish. Regaining control, she then said with bitterness, “when she walked through these doors I hoped with all my heart he would show compassion for her. But he didn’t, he never does. He killed her.”

           Sans didn’t know what to say, what could he say? It’s okay? How could it be okay? It is never okay to hurt a child like that. And this was the first time he was actually putting any real thought into the killing of the humans. It was just the way things were. They needed the human souls to get out of here. Not once had he, or any other monster for that matter, bothered to think about who the humans were, what their lives were like, or even why they fell down here.

Patience, the cyan soul. Memories of when he used to work at the Lab started to filter back. He didn’t remember why, but the soul was in a glass jar that he was monitoring. Every detail of that memory was fuzzy at best. But still, it made him shiver with guilt as he looked at the door, “i-i’m sorry…”

“It’s not your fault,” She said quietly, “I’m just happy to have someone to finally talk to about it. But, now I’d rather talk about something else… why were you up again?”

Sans paused. He remembered saying he wasn’t sleeping well, and he doubted she just forgot that. Was she fishing for details? Did she know he lied and is seeing if he’d say something different or if he would tell the truth this time? After what she just said, what was his nightmare in comparison. True, it was bad, Papyrus was killed in front of him. He fought over and over again until finally feeling himself die. But they are back now. Alive and well.

Actually, his bro was well. Sans, though, felt jumpy. This was the first dream he ever remembers feeling death. Whatever was messing with the timelines has figured out how to win against him. That knowledge terrified him, chilling his soul more than the snow ever could.

“Dishes?” she asked.Normally she called him ‘friend,’ but she used the nickname for him based on the first joke he told her. She generally only uses it when upset or very concerned; and, judging by the sound of her voice, he’d guess the latter.

He couldn’t burden her with things that no longer happened, not after what she has been through, “just, not sleeping well. which is odd, ya know, since i’m usually so good at it i can do it with my eyes closed.”

She was quiet for a moment before saying in a stern tone, “I don’t believe you. There is a slight difference in you voice when you try to pass something off as nothing. That and you try to distract with a pun or joke. What is really wrong?”

How did she get so good at reading him? Rubbing the back of his neck and thought quietly, then sighed, “i don’t want to bother you with it, just was hoping for some company.”

“Please, bother me,” She replied quickly.

“it’s… it’s nothing.”

“Well, if it truly is nothing then you should have no problem telling me.”

This woman was very stubborn. With a sigh he finally said, “i had a nightmare. i have nightmares fairly often, really, but this one got to me.”

“I’m so sorry to hear that. What happened in it?” He could hear her concern.

“don’t worry about it,” he sighed, leaning his head back against the door.

Silence falls between them before she speaks up, “I am your friend, right?”

“of course, you’re my best friend, really,” Sans replied in earnest, lifting his head off the door and looking at it.

“Then please, as a friend, tell me what you dreamed.”

Lowering his head he felt a little shame before finally speaking. He goes over all he remembered. Coming to the door to find it open and dust. Looking for the dog patrol and not finding them. Finally, locating his brother. He recounts how he arrives just in time to see his dear, little brother battered and in pain before he dies to some assailant he can’t remember. He remembers fighting over and over and over again. He shivers and hugs himself as he tells her about how he felt his body just fade away to dust.

“What a horrible dream, no wonder you couldn’t sleep. My dear friend, that was definitely not nothing, and I’m happy you finally told me about it,” She said after listening to him, “I wish this door wasn’t between us so I could hug you.”

“y’know, I thought the same thing when you were talking earlier,” he suddenly got an idea. “hey, close your eyes.”

“Okay, now what?” She asked, sounding intrigued by what he had in mind.

“alright, now imagine me sitting in front of you. add a foot or two of height if you want, i won't mind,” He grinned, listening to her giggle a little at that.

“No, I think I’ll go with your actual height the best I can. And my, are you handsome,” she said in an almost singing way.

“uh, heh, think your imaging my brother, he’s the handsome one,” his face felt warm and he was happy for once there was a door between them. “but, moving on, image me extending my hands and taking yours in mine, then holding them.”

“I hope you're imaging the same. And thank you, I feel so much better doing that,” she said. Her voice had a small sense of happiness returning.

Smiling he said, “i am, and same here.”

  Things had been nice since telling Tori about Papyrus. It had an affect on their relationship. Not the way his darker side had hoped for, but he was enjoying what he got instead. It was clear that Tori was happy Sans had opened up to her, and he could tell she was waiting patiently for him to say more. That will be difficult, but he knew he had to, he did promise. Even if it ruins all of this, a promise is a promise.

Sans looked over at his hand, warmly engulfed in Tori’s paw, his phalanges peeking through as their fingers are entwined. Noticing his thumb was free, he moved it along her hand to feel the softness of her fur. Even though he had felt it before, it still was new to him, and almost addicting.

Feeling watched, he glanced up at her and noticed she was looking down at him. A wave of embarrassment washed over him, and he felt his magic creep into his face as he looked away. Instead, he looked down at the path they were walking on, the same path they took every day. As he did, he felt her squeeze his hand in an affirming manner.

He was as trapped emotionally in this relationship as his hand is trapped by her’s. Even the aspects of his life that were free desired to be a part of her’s. As much as the dark part of him wanted to sabotage this, he couldn’t. No matter how much he just wanted to run away and give up, he couldn't.

It still was baffling that she would spend time on him. What did he really have to offer her? Companionship? According to her that was enough, but it didn’t feel fair. From what he could tell, he just happened to be the lucky one. The one who happened to have a sentry station so close to the door. Who decided to go looking for cameras, found a door then decided to practice knock knock jokes.

He should of tested that luck at a casino.

One thing did bother him about her. For all the worrying about his sleep habits and tendency to hide his emotional garbage, she sure seems willing to overlook her own troubles. He wanted her to talk about it, but she never provides a chance. It didn't take him long to notice that she stays up late, is easy to wake, and up early. He sometimes wonders how much sleep she gets. Even when he is trying to be as quiet as possible after a nightmare, most of the time he can hear her moving around in her own room.

Considering their past talks, he wouldn't be surprised if this problem had anything to do with the children. Which, other than the last child, she has not mentioned since he met her in person. There was no way that burden just disappear the moment they met.

Most likely, she is hiding it. The only reason he could guess was that she doesn't want him worrying; which, made him feel like he was extra baggage. She didn’t need or deserve having someone around who is just more trouble than they are worth. And from his angle, he was definitely not worth much. But perhaps he could raise that value if he could help her.

Thing is, she is more ‘motherly’ than he could ever be; thus, she finds a way to get people to talk about their issues. Meanwhile, Sans generally didn't like people prying into his business; so, he never stuck his nonexistent nose into other people's lives. But that doesn’t mean he doesn't care or won't notice a problem. What he had done with Alphys is hint at it nonchalantly in private conversation. But he mostly waits. When they want to talk, they will talk.

But Tori seemed different.

 For a moment, he paused his thoughts. They had arrived at the room where the humans fall, the room with the flowers. He had overestimated himself. He could stand in the room with the flowers, but he no interest in being near them. Halfway through the room he started to pull his hand free, but Tori didn't let go.

No… no no no!

Sans continued to walk with her, but he wanted to stop. He didn't want to be near them or look at them any closer than needed. He outwardly acted calm, but inwardly he was trying not to panic. Again, he tried taking his hand back, this time with more effort; and, thankfully, she surrendered it.

No sooner was it free did he stick it in its jacket pocket. As much as he wanted to leave the room, he forced himself to stay. To take his mind off of what that one flower did, he watched Tori while considering the nature of astrophysics, primarily focusing on the formulas for the movement of galaxies.

As he worked through the numbers, he started to relax. It also created a new perspective of how insignificant those little weeds are compared to the vastness of the universe, and especially the all-but-confirmed multiverse.

Once she was done tending the flowers and ready to go, they started walking side by side again. Her hand was there, open and welcoming his, but he hesitated. She must have noticed, she glanced down at him with a concerned look. It wouldn't be a lie if he said he felt a little betrayed when she didn't let go when he first tried to free his hand. Yet, as he already knew, he was in love with her. So he removed his hand from his pocket and placed it in her’s. Again, her soft fingers enclosing his metacarpals and phalanges in her warm, safe hold.

Now his mind tried to remember where he was in thought before. After a quick review he remembered.

 Tori more than seems different, she is different.

By wrapping herself up in other people's problems, she ignores her own. In fact, she may use them as an excuse to downplay her own. A sort of “I don’t have it as bad as so-and-so; therefore, I shouldn’t complain.” When in truth, she's had it far worse, and is only letting it fester to focus more about helping someone else instead.

And, boy, does he know about letting emotional crap fester. Of course, it does help when you have built up a callus. He had a really thick emotional callus before Tori started working on it. Not that it still isn't thick, but some things that didn't faze him before now do.

Perhaps, that is what happened with her. After all, she had been here, alone, for very long time before now. Isolation is not easy on the soul or mind. She may have kept herself busy, but she was deprived of real contact unto a human fell. Then she would take them in, care for them, watch them leave, and hear of their death. Over and over again.

How powerless she must of felt; a feeling he knew well.

“hey, tori,” Sans finally said.

“Hmmm?”

He rethought the possible wording, but then figured he should just go with it, “ya know if you ever need to talk, i’m, heh, all ears.”

To that she giggled, “I do believe between us, I've got more ear that you.”

He chuckled, “that's true, tori, but still. you do know, you're free to talk, vent, or whatever, right? that i’m here for you?”

For a while she just stared down at him. Then she smiled softly, “thank you, Sans, but I’m fine.”

“i expect to see me credited in the bibliography or i’m considering that plagiarism.”

Well, that got a reaction out of her, just not the one he wanted. She looked shocked, and even a little angry. Really not what he expected, but he can work with it. He looked ahead while giving her paw a reassuring squeeze. He doubted it had anywhere near the same effect compared to when she does that to him, but it was worth a try. With her full attention, he tried again, “i’m no more blind to your distress as you are to mine. and just like you wanna help me, i wanna help you. just wanted to make sure you know, that if you ever need or want to talk i’m here for you.”

“Sans, you don't-”

“‘need to burden yourself with my problems?’ or something to that extent, right? If so, i’m again considering it plagiarism.”

She stopped walking and so did he. It was difficult looking up at her, as she was clearly annoyed. Still, he wasn’t going to shy away. He wanted her to know how important this was to him.

“I have been thinking that and saying it far longer than you have been alive,” she said sharply, “you should be citing me.”

“so, then you do need to talk,” Sans said, and hoped that cornering her doesn’t backfire.

The look she shot him was one he’d have hoped to never see. There was no doubt, she was mad. Her grip on his hand tightened and loosened as she decided between letting it go or hanging on. When her hand started to move away, he held on.

“Sans, you have enough to deal with,” Tori said, as she continued trying to pull her hand away.

“your point,” he said, keeping a firm grip.

She sighed, “let go and think about this. I’m not the one with nightmares keeping me up half the night.”

“true,” he said, tightening his hold a little, “but how did you know that unless you were already awake? kinda hard to dream if you don’t sleep.”

“I sleep!” She snapped. “Not everyone needs to sleep as much as you.”

“papyrus didn't sleep much either, but he also seemed to be hyperactive. why don’t you need the daily recommended 8 hours of sleep?”

“Sans, stop,” she said, again trying to pull her paw free.

“NO,” he kept his hold, “it is not alright for you to ignore your pain to focus solely on mine.”

“What bothers me I can live with, I have lived with. And it doesn't disrupt my daily living,” she huffed.

“except for your sleep and other things,” he looked up at her, “you can’t tell me you don't get anxious when i leave for errands.”

“Of course I do,” she threw her free hand in the air, “it is hard not to worry when you had a panic attack at the-”

She may have cut herself off, but he knew what she was going to say. Sans felt his eye lights go out and he looked at the ground. A part of him was ready to give up on the argument, dropping his point as well as his hold on her hand. His grip started to loosen as he chuckled dryly.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn't have said that,” Tori sounded apologetic but also a little exasperated.

“no worries,” he put on a smile, “it is true, after all. and you're right, i hadn’t considered how hard it would be not to worry about some, heh, ‘one’ who lost it at the sight of flowers.” ‘Probably because that idiot is me,’ he added to himself.

“No, it was wrong of me to say that,” Tori said, sounding softer in tone.

This was a reminder of why giving up is so easy. When he does try he fails or messes up in some way or form. Before though, a reset was around the corner to clean up his mistakes. Now, he had to live with them. Sans looked at his hold on Tori’s paw. “i just,” he sighed. Is it really so hard to do more for someone? “i’m sorry.”

“There is nothing for you to be sorry about,” she said.

And yet there was a lot for him to be sorry about. Failing at nearly everything he did, upsetting her, his unorganized self, and let's not forget about breaking the promise. Thing about that last one, if he was in that situation now he’d do it again. Hard to say you’re sorry if you would just repeat it.

He let his grip slip, to take his hand back and let her go. As his hand moved from her paw, he felt her try to hold on. Even though she tried to keep his hand in her paw, she just wasn't fast enough. Which is good, she doesn’t need him clinging to her. The words ‘smiley trash bag’ echoed in his head. He knew where he heard them from, and that the source should not be trusted. Yet, he currently felt it couldn’t be truer.

Tori placed a paw on each of his shoulders, as if trying to make sure he stays still. In fact, he wouldn't of been surprised if that was purpose. Then, once again she said, “I am sorry, I never should have said, let alone think, that.”

“it’s alright, to-”

Before he could finish, Tori startled him by throwing her paws up. “That is it!” She then lowered her left paw to her hip while the right covered her eyes, rubbing them tiredly, “I know you hate making promises, but I propose that neither of us use the words ‘fine’ and ‘alright’ to describe ourselves, or a situation, to each other ever again.”

“what?”

“If you want me to be more honest about how I am feeling, you need to as well. And we can start by banning ‘fine’ and ‘alright’ since we both hide behind those words. This is a two way promise, so we both have to agree to it. And I agree to keep it.”

Well, it seemed fair, and it would mean that she would potentially talk to him about her own emotional scars. But it would also mean he would have to share more. After all, it really wouldn't be honoring the purpose of the promise if he just started using words like ‘ok’ and ‘well’ instead. She was already willing to make it, and he still can’t really say ‘no’ to her.

“sure,” he replied.

Calmness spread across Toriel's face, and she let out a breath that Sans didn't notice she was holding. “Alright,” she then closed her eyes, appearing to gather herself.

When she opened them, she looked him in the eye sockets. Judging by how he felt, he didn't have much in the way of eye lights. Most likely just two dim spots for her to look at.

She placed her right paw on his shoulder, while wearing a concerned expression. “Now, earlier, you said you were sorry. I still feel you have nothing to apologize for; but, it was wrong of me to overlook your apology. After all, if you felt you have wronged me, and wish to make amends, I should acknowledge that. So I forgive you.”

Annoyed at the burning sensation of tears gathering in his eye sockets, he struggled to keep his sorry self together. Even worse, he was sure the lights dimmed to nothing as Tori went from a concerned to a disheartened expression.

Here he was, making everything worse, just by standing here. In an attempt to salvage this he said, “same, about your apology. i, uh, shouldn’t've tried brushing’ it off. so, i forgive you, too.” While inwardly he amended that he deserved it, and it was just a wake up call to remind him of how things are.

That turned out being the right choice as a smile, though small, appeared on her face. “Sans, remember when you asked me this morning if I was feeling okay? And I said I was alright?” He nodded in response, then she continued, “I lied, I’m exhausted. Physically and mentally.”

Unsure of what else to do he just shrugged,  “same.”

Toriel offered him her paw, “how about we head back, relax, have an early dinner, and night.”

Pulling a hand free of the jacket pocket, he took the offered paw. “sounds good, tori,”

It slowly started to sink in that he actually succeeded. That, in a very roundabout way, the end goal he wanted was achieved. She was going to talk more about her own pain.

And, while he still felt like garbage, he just no longer felt normal garbage. Oddly, it was as if he somehow became a step above the normal refuse. Like recycling that hadn't been recycled yet.

Well, at least that was a new way to look at himself.

  Hours later and Sans is in bed, rubbing his tired eye sockets. At this point they were so worn that lighting them was starting to hurt. How many times did he fight the kid that he was still seeing images of that hallway on random nights?

If only the memories returning were more consistent he would of been done with that series of loops. Though he was sure that ending would still haunt him. How could it not? He won't easily forget the feeling of fighting over and over and over, putting everything into each attack, bending the code to break the rules to make things harder, only to be cut down by something lurking within the kid.

Sans quietly slipped out of bed and over to the dresser. He didn't really use it except for a few of his favorite socks from his collection and to store the notebooks. It also was where Geode, the rock, sat. But that is on top of the dresser, so he wasn't sure if that really counted as using it versus just being a convenient spot for a pet rock to sit. While his tired mind would have been happy debating this to himself, if it meant staying awake, that wasn't the reason he got up. He grabbed both notebooks and climbed back in bed.

Noticing he didn't have anything to write with, he quickly glanced around. On the night stand was the small notebook he uses to record current events. Next to it is a pen that will suffice.

First he wrote what the flower, or first anomaly did, which wasn't that bad compared to other times. With a yawn he ripped it out and slipped it in near the beginning. It seemed to be about then, before the flower became more brash, cruel, and violent. Looking at the page, he sleepily chuckled, over half of it was in skeletal alphabet, “hands.” In the morning, when he is more awake, he’ll try being precise with “when” it occurred.

In the second he simply wrote “more loops with the kid in the hall”. He paused for a moment, thinking before adding “X5, did not see end this time. did not see trick.”

With a sigh, he opted out in putting them back, figuring he should try to go to sleep. For now he slid them both into the pillowcase on the underside of the pillow he primarily used. Settling back, he closed his eyes and tried drift off to sleep.

 He stood in a hall, bathed in golden light that is broken up with shadows. Across from him stood a small figure, holding a knife, and wearing an expressionless face...

 Nope. Sans’s eyes sockets flew open and he took a few deep, calming breaths. Sitting up, he slowly let out a long sigh.

Welp, sleep was out of the question. In this worn out state of mind, this seemed funny to him. Him, lazy Sans who could fall asleep anywhere, can’t sleep a full night in a bed. He covered his mouth after a couple of sleep deprived, hysterical laughs escaped. If he hadn't somehow woken Tori before, he did now.

He got out of bed and took a shortcut, so when his metatarsals hit the floor, it was in the kitchen. Flipping on the light he thought quick.

With how tired he most likely looked, Tori would flip if she caught him trying to make coffee again. Glancing at the tea cupboard, he wondered if she had any black tea, or any others that typically had a high caffeine content. He could try passing it off as an herbal tea if Tori asks.

Now for the annoying part. He started climbing up on the countertop, since he was too short to reach otherwise. When he nearly fell backwards he struggled to hold back the hysterical laughter again, letting out an odd sounding chuckle instead.

Unsure of how much longer he had before Tori will come, if she does, he started to search quickly. Thankfully most of her teas were the easy to use, already in a bag, kind. They were all in tins, some labeled on the outside of what the contents were, others had a label inside.

As he took out the last tin and looked in it, he sighed. All she had were herbal teas, all naturally caffeine free. Holding the tin, he considered just going with one and hoping for the best. But he really did not want to go to sleep.

That’s when he saw light glinting off something in the back of the cupboard. Looking in, he saw it was a bottle of wine. There were actually four bottles just sitting there. His index finger tapped on the tin. Right now, he would love to be numb to how he was feeling. But, he knew there was no way he could hide that from Tori. Still, it was tempting.

He was so transfixed by the bottles that he didn't know Tori had arrived at the kitchen until she said, “making tea?”

Startled, and feeling like he just got caught with his hand in the proverbial cookie jar, he nearly fell from the counter again. After catching himself, he turned to face her, “geez, tori, i think i just jumped outta my skin.” He laughed at his own joke far more than it deserved.

She laughed too, but there was a look on her face. One of her “I know something is up” looks to be exact. In response to it he eased back on his laughter and tried to calm down.

“but, uh, yeah. was thinking of making…,” he forgot what was in it, “this one.” Well, that was anything but convincing.

“Sure you weren't thinking of something stronger?” She said while walking closer.

“uh, well…,” his finger tapped the tin again. Normally he would've said something like, ‘naw, this is fine’ but he promised that away. “i, uh, did think about it.”

“And?” She reach into the cupboard, shifting the teas. “Do you want any?”

Was she really offering him alcohol? Was this a test? Maybe it was just her current mood. If he asked nicely, maybe she would let him have coffee? Honestly, between the two, he’d prefer have the latter and not sleep for the rest of the night. Though he doubted she would.

“well, actually, if i had a choice, i’d rather have some coffee,” it didn't hurt to try, he figured.

“Sans, it is the middle of the night,” she said as she pulled out a bottle.

That made him snort as he struggled not to start laughing, “so alcohol is a-ok but coffee is out of the question.”

“Yes,” she said while playfully sticking out her tongue.

He looked at the wine bottle then sighed. Sure, being numb to all this would be nice; but, drunk Sans doesn't know how to shut up most of the time. And currently, he wants to maintain control over what he says.

“i’ll stick with, uh, whatever this one was.” Opening the tin again, he looked in at the piece of box, which she must of torn off to label the tea bags. “camomile…”

With a shake of her head and a small giggle, she teased, “don't sound too excited about it.” She got out her tea pot and a wine glass. She then filled the pot, lit the stove with her magic, and place the pot to heat up.

“sorry if i woke you,” Sans said, watching her as she popped the wine cork with a claw.

“You didn't, I was awake,” she sighed.

“wanna talk?” He offered.

“Do you want to talk about why you are up?”

He winced slight, “not particularly.”

“Then you have your answer.”

Awkward silence fell between them until the kettle whistled. She grabbed a mug for him and he place a tea bag. While she poured the water he put the tin back. He was about to hop down when she gave him the mug.

With the skills that only a mother has, or someone who has worked years in a field with similar requirements, she put the wine bottle under one arm, grabbed her glass in the same hand, and grabbed him off the counter in the other arm. What made this a feat was the speed she performed this and the fact she looked like she could easily carry more.

Needless to say, he was impressed. Though, truthfully, the feeling was a bit stronger than that. Actually, “a bit” doesn't really explain how he felt. Let's just leave it at: he feigned interest in smelling the tea to use the mug as an excuse to hide his face.

Tori carried him over to the sofa and set her glass and bottle down. She started to pick up a book when she glanced down at him. He could have sworn he felt his soul quiver the moment her eyes met his sockets. “Want anything to read?”

“i’m…,” he paused before saying ‘fine.’ He really was just fine, but he didn't want to say ‘i’m fine, really.’ He was more than fine, actually, but he didn't know how to express that. So he started again, “i’m not in the mood to read.”

The look she gave him was understanding, and she picked up her book before sitting with her back to the where the back and arm of the sofa meet. Doing this allowed her to sit at an angle that gave her the ability to lean comfortably into the sofa cushions, while it also allowed her easy access to her glass and bottle. But that position also created a gap between her and the back of the sofa. A gap he was now trapped in, not that he was trying or even wanted to escape.

Sans sipped at his tea, taking this feeling in. This wasn't the first time he has found himself stuck between the sofa and Tori; but, unlike then, he wasn't waking up and worrying that staying meant he was taking advantage. She placed him here, she wanted him here. Why? He’d never know.

He felt his magic trying to build up within him, which caused a small shiver and rattle. In response, Tori put an arm around him in a half hug.

From her he felt something. He has felt her magic before, but the more expressive part of it always felt hidden. Much like himself, she has locked that part of her magic away. But it seemed like some of it was seeping through. There was a feeling that seemed foreign, and it was causing his soul to feel weird.

Or was it the other way around. Thinking back, he was feeling this way when she picked him up and carried him out here. He wasn't feeling anything from her then. So…

It was him, she was responding to him and not the other way around.

This realization caused a wave of panic. How much of his emotions was coming through, and for how long? And now, was she feeling his worry? He tried pulling back, to hide his emotions like normal.

Soft, tender, and slightly prickly hairs tickle the back of his skull as she nuzzled him. “Just relax,” her voice whispers.

Looking back at her, into her rich burgundy eyes, he felt his soul and magic stir again. There was a look of safety and peace in her gaze. And he felt the wall, that acted as a damn to keep his emotions in, melt more.

Love enveloped him in return, and he leaned into her. Slowly, they were both opening up more to each other. And he was starting to understand that was leading to their love deepen.

He could feel her weariness matching his own. While it is possible to explore this magic deeper, both were content with this embrace. With her physical and magical warmth, and the feeling of the hot tea, turned to raw magical energy, within him, he started to feel drowsy…

 The hall is filled in a golden glow. According to the old timers, it is meant to simulate the sunset on the surface. When he was young he marveled at it, he felt at awe at the beauty. Many years later, after letting his views became jaded, he can't help but wonder if it is accurate.

Really, there is no reason to care if it is or not. He lost interest in going to the surface a long time ago. Instead of reminding themselves of what they don't have, shouldn't they be happy with what they do have?

Not that he didn't long to see the stars and feel the sun, but what's the point if the kid resets. And they will reset, in fact, monster kind might have already seen the surface only to have it stripped away. All memories of the night sky robbed from him… from Papyrus. And for what? Changes in dialog?

Sans was leaning against a pillar, which blocked the bright light coming in through the window. Each column created sharp contrasting shadow, which seemed eerie. While he was using one to wait in, he couldn't shake the feeling someone else was here, hiding in the shadows with him. But when he looked, no one was there.

His paranoia was cut short as the sound of footsteps interrupted his thoughts. How many times has it been now? He finally lost count at 30 even though he stopped trying to count after 11; but, that was a long time ago. And the painful truth is that they haven't even happened.

Paradoxes: fun to theorize, hell to live through.

Stepping out in front of the kid with a shortcut, he was surprised. Out of all the times he had seen the kid they never looked like that. The look they gave him chilled his bones. But the human was ready to fight, he had to say something.

Heh.

And there was the joke. His life, his existence, was nothing but a game to this anomaly. They already won. What was the point now other than entertainment?

He failed. The fight hadn't even happened yet, and he knew he lost. He will fail again as he desperately struggles to stay alive, to force the kid to reset. What tricks did he use? What order was his attacks? No matter, he became predictable. The kid knew his tricks, his attacks.

There was only one thing left to do. He had accepted the fact he had no control of his life for the longest time. Resets destroy what you make. Anomalies kill what you love. Memories of what you did disappear. But a part of him held onto a thread of hope that perhaps he could do something. That he could keep the anomaly from destroying everything.

“... that expression that you're wearing… ...well, i won't grace it with a description.”

He was such a good comedian that he didn't notice, till now, that he played the biggest prank on himself. Hoping.

 Sitting up, Sans put a hand to his chest. He felt his shirt was wet and sticking to his ribs. Looking down, he saw red on his chest and hand. Red…

“heh,” he uttered before trying to move from wherever he is currently located. He wasn't sure when or where he was. Currently, his vision was unfocused and blurry because his magic refused to cooperate. Which, considering magic is an expression of oneself, meant he was a mental and emotional disaster. Well, more so than usual.

Something stopped him, wrapping around him. He hadn't expected that and his mind raced, trying to decide if this was friend of foe. There was only one he could think of that has ever bothered him as he slowly dusted.

The flower.

Why couldn't that weed just let him be? He struggled against it, fighting to free himself from its vines. His magic felt like a tangled mess as he tried to summon up a wave of bones to defend himself with. The magic is so unstable he couldn't even summon one bone, let alone a wave.

Luckily, he was able to wiggle free, but hit the ground as the flower must have lifted him. Sans started to curl up, waiting to dust when the flower started to grab him again.

“just let me die in peace,” he said the best he could. Magic is how he speaks, and pretty much do anything including moving. As long as he was a mental and emotional wreck, any use of magic is an internal fight.

Unable to clearly see, he had no idea where he was. Which meant, even if he could get his magic working long enough, trying to use a shortcut was out of the question.

This time the flower wasn't trying to lift him, as it put some weight on him as if holding him in place. He could barely move, and where his bones touch the floor was starting to hurt.

Floor, not ground, this feel like wood flooring. Grillby’s perhaps?

He felt something petting his skull, offering comfort. It was not unlike the flower to do that, offer false compassion before doing something cruel. But that was done soulless, without the feeling behind it. A cold act that indicated that thing were about to go from bad to worse.

In comparison, this sensation he felt was truly comforting. Each stroke, from the frontal to occipital bones, offered warmth and peace. He closed his eye sockets, wanting to ground himself to that feeling.

Eventually words started to filter through as his fears died down. The voice was soft, sweet, but carried a hint of uncertainty, “it's alright, Sans. You’re safe here. You’re,” there was a pause and the voice sounded on the verge of tears, “You’re not dying.”

He open his left eye to look, knowing that voice. Tori. How could his idiotic mind confuse this glorious woman for that horrible weed?

She was pretty much laying on him in her attempt to hold him still. Embarrassed it came to that, he started to speak, to apologize. As the words started to form a wave of nausea traveled through him. Any attempt to speak now would not have good results.

When he struggled against her, the magic he tried and failed to use must have tangled into unusable knots. It has happened before, and generally the rest of his magic can break it down to be safely radiated off like body heat. In those cases he suffers mild nausea for a few hours, and then everything goes back to normal. This, though, felt like an excessive amount of wasted magic that needed out.

He closed his eye socket, cutting back on any unnecessary magic use. If only he could get control of this feeling long enough to get to a trash can, sink, outside, or something.

“Are you alright?” He heard her ask, and he dared to shake his head in response.

That action caused some of the wasted magic to start traveling up. He fought to keep if down as he was scooped off the floor. Even with his sockets closed, and vision cut off, the world whizzed past him, adding to his sick feeling. By the time he could no longer hold it back, he was at what felt like a trash can.

He couldn't remember the last time he had ever opened his mouth, or if he ever did. Marking this a special occasion, his teeth parted to allow the wasted magic out. Once done, he sat back, trembling from a mix of exhaustion, embarrassment, and displeasure at the new sensation, that didn't feel new.

There is not one memory in his head of throwing up; and yet, he knew and recognized all of that. Which means the memories must be tied to his past, the part he can't fully remember.

He could hear Tori was talking but it took a moment for the words to make sense.

Wine? On him?

He glanced down with his left eye, waiting for the magic to focus enough. Red on his chest. He closed his eye socket again, bad memories of events that had, yet never had, happened poking at him from the back of his mind. But it is wine, not… that. She said she drifted off while holding her glass and accidently got wine on him.

Once that was sorted out he noticed she was still apologizing. Right now he didn't feel like trying to speak. If she knew ‘hands’ he would reassure her that way. Instead he just offered her a thumbs up before leaning against the trash can.

He was fine there, but Tori must not have felt the same. Her movements were slow, as if trying to avoid anymore upsets. Lifting him from the floor, she moved him to a kitchen chair. One of her paws settled on his head for a moment, before she pushed the chair closer to the table. She tied up the garbage bag and replaced it with another. Not wanting her to have to clean up after himself, he started to turn to get up.

“Don't you dare move from that chair. You feel warmer than normal and should rest,” she said in a tone that could be taken as harsh.

He could hear the softer, caring aspect within. All the time he knew her by voice alone was helpful now that he couldn't see her; or, more accurately, can't see her clearly. What he mostly saw was a tall, white and yellow-green (from her snail pajamas), unfocused blob moving around a blurry space; which, he recognized as the kitchen strictly by the fact that he is sitting at the kitchen table.

Still, there she was, the beautiful blob that she was, cleaning up after him yet again. Nothing could convince him he was worth all this trouble. Tori was clearly getting a raw deal.

With a sigh, he let his vision darken and closed his eye sockets.

  Toriel took out the garbage, leaving Sans leaning on the table with his head resting on his arms. There was a spooky stillness about him now that he is not mimicking the movements of breathing. She figured he was so tired that even that act, which he performs in his sleep, is too much.

On the way back, she stopped at her bathroom to grab some things to clean him up. What happened was something she could not have possibly predicted. And now that it had, she felt guilty. It was her carelessness that seemed to have triggered the reaction.

Thinking back, she remembered a feelings right before he woke her up by moving. Before that moment they were still sharing a magical embrace. Through that bond came feelings that were so painful. Worthlessness, emptiness, fear… and a hopeless acceptance.

She had started to wake from them, when she felt him move. And by then, the damage was done. Toriel had learned something about him through observation that, she doubted, he would have willingly gave. He didn't behave as if any of those feelings were new. While she may have felt them before herself, it was never so strongly. Even the night she heard him knocking on the door, during one of her darkest moments, she didn't feel like that. And while she was waking up due to those emotions, inadvertently, she sent him spiraling deeper into those dark thoughts.

Then there was what he said. That plea to be left alone while he dies haunted the back of her mind. It sounded like he had said it before. He was behaving so calmly, despite the fighting against her, it was easy to believe he had done this all before. What she witnessed felt like some morbid routine.

Grillby’s assessment of Sans’s behaviour, as if he had been through a war, was right. Even she had nights like that after the last war. But over time, and with the help of others, she healed. But Sans was born underground, so what possibly could be the cause of this?

Sighing, she turned to his room to get him a clean shirt. After looking around she found he only had three shirts, one of which he was currently wearing.

Toriel’s hand first moved to palm her face, as she should have suspected this; but, she ending up holding back a sob. From what she could tell, he didn't bring much at all with him. And what he did bring was hardly worth him, yet she was sure he didn't see it that way.

It hurt knowing he didn't see his own self worth. To know he was willing to just die alone. And how was she going to help him when she was also so hurt. Since their walk, she thought about what he had said. He was right in saying that she needed help.

In quiet contemplation, she wiped the tears from her eyes and face. Though some may say it is not the business of the injured to heal others, she remembers healing from her own emotional wounds before. It was fellow veterans, who knew and understood what she went through, that helped her more than anyone else.

Toriel was now hurt by the loss of her children, all nine. Years of self isolation didn't help anymore than the loss of her ex. These were different than what Sans is going through, but that didn't matter to her. They can heal together.

Already, since that promise, Sans has been opening up more. That was progress. Everything had to be done slowly with him, in his own time. Same thing with her. So, they will walk the healing path together, leaning on each other as they go.

She stepped out of the room and moved to her own. Looking through her shirts, she found a clean one that he could use. Tomorrow, they can get him some more clothes.

One last time she stopped at the bathroom and quickly washed and dried her face. Looking in the mirror she saw herself, her face far younger than the light behind her eyes. The things these eyes have seen. Tales her tongue could tell.

She has lost so many in her time, family, friends, loved ones all the same. There was no way she was going to sit by and watch another disappear. Not again.

Walking back she found Sans where she left him. She thought he was asleep until his left socket opened slightly. His smile widened briefly in an attempt to welcome her back.

“I brought your toothbrush, so you can clean out your mouth, among other things,” Toriel said, and watched him sit up, slowly.

She offered him some water but he ignored it, putting some paste on the brush and opening his mouth for the second time since arriving. It wasn't until he was done scrubbing did he grab the glass she gave him and got up. She watched, admittedly curious, as he tilted his head over the sink to rinse out his mouth; using the stool she provided for comfort and ease.

And now that made sense. His mandible isn't closed at the bottom, plus he doesn't have lips. Unless it is magical in nature or converted to magic, it would just flow out one way or another.

Before he could walk back she met him at the sink. “May I set you on the counter?” She asked as she started to fill a basin with water, which she warmed with her magic.

“i can climb up if you want… but, uh, why?” He sounded so tired.

“I want to help you clean up,” she offered with a smile.

He shrugged slightly, “i got it, tori.”

“Please, Sans?” A part of her felt bad asking, as she has not yet heard him turn her down.

Sans just nodded and started to climb up. As much as she wanted to help him, it seemed like he needed some independence right now. He was half way up when he ended up looking at his left hand and paused. As if frozen by the sight he stopped his climb onto the counter.

With a quick glance, she noticed it was also stained with wine and moved to assist him. When he was up on the counter she pulled him into a hug, then took the left hand into a free paw. Hidden from his sight, she felt her dear friend and love relax.

Starting with the offending hand, she took a washcloth over it to rinse it before applying soap. The soap was one she bought for him, figuring it would be good for his body type. Gently scrubbing his hand, she marveled at all the tiny spaces dirt could hide.

“tori…,” Sans started as she rinsed off his hand.

Checking his palm over she smiled seeing the stain was gone. She grabbed a towel to dry his hand. Releasing it, she watched as he looked at it, then back at her, “tori, you don't need to do that.”

“I know,” she smiled, “but I figured wash’s the harm?” He chuckled at the pun, and Toriel noticed him relax a little. She placed a hand by the side of his face and ran her thumb under his eye socket. The socket closed and his head leaned into her hand, “besides, you look as tired as I feel, if not more. And I soappose I want to do this, because I love you that much.”

She then washed the other hand, before changing washcloths and water and washing his face. Toriel smiled as he closed his eye sockets, clearly enjoying the feeling of the warm cloth around his tired eyes. Seeing how much it put him at ease she took her time, and giggled softly when she noticed he was starting to drift off.

“Sans, we should change your shirt before you fall asleep again,” she said while giving him a friendly nuzzle on his nasal bone. He snorts a little, trying not to laugh and she can’t help but smile.

“ok,” he says, and starts to take the shirt off. She helps to make sure the wine stain doesn’t touch where she just cleaned. Though it seemed dry enough to not get on anything else, she wanted to make sure. Especially considering his reaction.

She set the shirt to the side and looked at him, wondering how much got through the shirt. Sans was looking at his sternum and ribs also. He was handling it better, even though his eyes were dark again, at least his behavior was normal. It was interesting watching his ribcage expand and retract, as if sighing. Air whistled out past his teeth, and he looked up at her.

“I’m sorry,” Toriel still felt bad about her carelessness. How could she have done that to him.

“no worries, tori, i forgave you a while back,” he replied.

How he could stand dealing with her silliness and overbearing behaviors, she will never know. It could not be easy dealing with her tendencies to act like she is still queen of the underground. And then she will do something like this, showing an ineptitude that only she seemed capable of achieving.

“tori?” Sans was looking at her, seeming confused.

“I’m al… I…,” She wasn’t sure what to say.

There was a snort from Sans as he grinned, “not easy, is it. s’okay, take your time.” She wrinkled her snout as she tried not to laugh, happy he was taking a light tone about her almost slip up. “while you figure out what you want to say, can i have a shirt or something. i feel like you can see right through me like this.”

With that Toriel laughed, putting a paw to her head, “oh Sans, I would of thought you would be too bone tired to be telling puns.”

The laugh he made in response was tired, but strong. It made her feel good that he was already doing better, but they both needed sleep. So she settled down and smiled sweetly at him. This kind skeleton, what was she to do with him.

She held up a shirt that had a bear on it and said “hibearnating” and he chuckled, then rubbed the back of his neck. “i don’t know tori, that looks, uh, a little big. i can just grab one from my room,” he suggested.

“Nonsense, all your shirts need to be washed,” she said, though her tone was friendly, he still glanced away. She didn’t want to upset him, “but I think this will work well. What about your sternum and ribs?”

Sans glanced down again and shrugged, “i’ll take a bath tomorrow.”

“Alright, then arms up,” she said as she helped him get the shirt on. It fit him like a straight dress, luckily, it was a short sleeve so it doesn’t completely hide his arms.

Looking down at himself, Sans chuckled, “this should be bearable.”

“Oh, enough, we need to sleep,” she said before kissing him quickly.

Two hands cup each side of her face, keeping her head close. His teeth touched her snout softly but there was magic behind it. She could feel warmth, love, passion, and the magic that made him. A feeling as though there was no need to rush, that this moment was to be enjoyed slowly. It was addicting and she wanted to be completely surrounded by this sweet tenderness. There was another form of magic that was strong in him, that took her a moment to recognize. It was objective, precise, and fair. She never knew justice was a strong trait for him.

There was only one thing she could think of doing; and, she kissed him back with the strong affection she had for him. His hands moved through her fur, ruffling it in a way that now edged on sensual. In response her own hands started to explore what she can of him with the over sized shirt on.

As Toriel moved her hands over his ribs to under his arms, he started to snicker. This caused her to look at Sans as he squirmed a little, “sorry, that tickled.”

She felt her nose wrinkle again as she struggled not to laugh, “I don’t know about you,” she finally said, “but I’m ready to sleep.”

“heh, definitely,” he smiled up at her and she helped him down.

They walked together, hand in hand, down the hall. Toriel held tight to Sans’s hand as they reached her room, “Sans, please, stay with me tonight.”

He paused for a moment then looked up at her and nodded. They walked into her room together and climbed into bed. It was comforting to hold onto him, doing so reassured her he was still there. Toriel felt Sans bury his face into her neck fur, and she noticed her ear fell over the side of his head. As they embraced physically, she felt the magic made hug begin again.

And for first time in a long time, she slept, really slept. Not that light sleep that still leaves her feeling tired in the morning, but a real true sleep.

              Written in one of the notebooks, below the simple notes about the dream from the night before, was written “the brat killed me and came back to kill me again.”

              A few days had past, or he believed it was a few days. He was sleeping better now that he was sleeping in Tori’s warm arms, but that didn’t keep the memories from messing with his perception of time. Not that it really mattered anymore to him. After all, there was no longer a count down to reset, or count to see how many days before the next reset, depending on the quality of the ending.

It is a grim thought that there are timelines that leave the Sans wanting a reset. As far as his understanding, time ends when the reset occurs for that line, and that Sans becomes part of his consciousness; but, in a way, it was just him. A him that is not him. Living his life that he will not live. Making his decisions that he never gets to make.

Realizing he lost his place in the book, he yawned and tried yet again. Sans was cozy on the sofa, resting on his back with his head on Tori’s legs. She was absentmindedly petting his skull while they were reading. The feeling of her soft paw against his head was causing him to doze off, and to read the same line at least five times now. Even though he had read it multiple time it still didn't make sense, his foggy head read different words that weren’t even on the page each time.

Giving up, he closed the book and rolled to his side before curling up closer to her, prepared to snooze. That is when he felt Toriel run two fingers down his spine to the middle of his back. He straightened back out, enjoying the massage of his vertebrae, “tori…”

“Yes, dear?” Tori replied. Her voice as soft and pleasant as usual. His mind swimming in the sweet, smoothness in her tone.

“did i tell you ‘i love you’ today?”

“You have, and you know it,” She chuckled and lightly tickled his ribs, making him laugh. He tried to defend them since he wasn’t fond of being tickled; yet, was enjoying this moment too much to really make her stop, “I love you too, Sansy~.”

Well that just ruined the mood. Grabbing Tori’s hand, he holds it up and away from himself as he rolls to his back to look up at her, “ok, that needs to stop.”

“What does?” Tori asked, looking back down at him.

“i’m not fond of that nickname,” he couldn’t help but think of Bunny whenever he heard it. And he didn’t want to think of that constant flirt when he was with Tori.

“Is that so?” Tori took her hand back and tapped lightly between his eye sockets, “Well, I’m really not fond of the messes you make.” She had him there. He had become laxed on how well he kept his disordered self in check.

He shrugged, closing his right eye as he did, admitting defeat in that argument, “welp, ya got a point there, t.”

“T?” She gave him a puzzled look.

“yeah, a new nickname i thought of for you,” He grinned, thinking this might just work.

“Sans, T is a letter, not a nickname.” She was frowning slightly.

“mmmm,” he looked away as if in deep thought before looking back at her, “naw, it can be both.”

“Please don’t call me T.”

“i don’t know,” He shrugged and winked again as he looked up at her, “keep calling me ‘sansy’ and i may just keep calling you ‘t.’”

He watched as Tori struggled not to laugh, her face scrunching up in the most adorable way, “Fine then, Sansy~.”

“ok, t.”

How long has life been like this now? Happy. There was still that nagging feeling of guilt for feeling this way without his brother. Yet, he knew Papyrus wouldn’t want him feeling bad, Tori reminded him of that. Papyrus like finding the good in everything and everyone.

Keeping his right eye closed he continued to look up at Tori. He still didn't deserve her in his life. But his bro would be glad to see him this happy.

Right now, his biggest problem was with the memories of other timelines coming back. They messing with his understanding of what had occurred during this one. To make matters worse, he was sure Tori was starting to notice. She has been giving him this concerned look when he forgets something or brings up events in stories he thought he already told her.

It wasn’t all bad, since some of the memories are pleasant; but those he didn’t remember much of. And, to top it off, the details were fuzzy at best; leaving him with the notion that at one point things were ‘alright.’ And while the bad ones have gotten worse, a nagging feeling told him there were more to come. It made him nervous about what he will see.

Overall, the most annoying part was how the present becomes slurred together. He was losing track of how many days it had been since he moved into the ruins with Tori. How many weeks it had been since he confessed to Tori. Had it even been a week? He was certain it had been more than a week, so month? Two months?

However long it has been, he has had enough time to see a difference in the anomalies. Reading over the events in the “dream” notebooks, it became pretty clear that the kid was pretty straight forward with the way they killed. They didn’t toy around with people like a cat does with a mouse, unlike the first anomaly.

While he still has nightmares, they don't seem as bad waking up in Tori’s arms. Last thing he wanted her to know was how often he woke up at night. But it seemed to help her sleep having him there. Before she was such a light sleeper, he was sure he would be keeping her up half the night. Now, when he wakes from the mild ones she hardly stirs. And the bad ones, she comforts him back to sleep when before he couldn't.

Tori closed her book and grabbed Sans up in a hug, so tightly it caused him to grunt, “As much as I would like to stay here all day, we have things to do.” He made a disappointed groan to let her know his feelings on the matter, “None of that. There are library books to go back and there is a list I made of things they don’t sell in the store here, that I am hoping you can pick up.”

“ok,” Sans said with a yawn. He got up, slipped on his slippers while grabbing his jacket from off the sofa. Tori had neatly stacked the books to go back for him, which he picked up and carried into the kitchen with himself to get the list, “this shouldn’t take me too long. Might stop by grillby’s and say ‘hi’ while I’m there.”

“That’s fine,” Tori replied from the other room.

  “Oh, and Sans?” Toriel said as she walked into the kitchen. She sighed when she found Sans had already left with one of his shortcuts, “What am I to do with you.” She turned and walked down the hall, grabbing a laundry basket on the way.

Today she had been planning on cleaning and changing both hers and Sans’s bedsheets. She was going to ask Sans to gather his sheets for her before he left, but it was too late now. So, she will just do it herself. First she stripped her bed, taking the sheets and putting them in the basket.

As she worked, there was a nagging feeling. Something in her mind was telling her she should have also told him to stay safe. Though, she shook it off, informing herself that wasn't necessary.

She then walked to the room Sans still used, even though he slept in hers.

Perhaps it was a good thing that they didn’t share rooms yet. She looked around with a sigh. It could be worse, at least there was some form of organization to the madness. Still, she wouldn’t tolerated her own room being like this. For now, she will start with the bed, and ignored the rest.

This was something they needed to work on together. She did, after all, give him this space; and she wanted him to feel like it is his, even when he fully moves in with her. By having his own area, she hoped he’d consider the house his home. She wasn't fully convinced he does yet.

Even though he was no longer sleeping amid this mess, did not sit well with her. And she will need to convey that to him without taking over his room. The best way to start, she figured, was clean sheets for the bed he no longer uses. If he ever needs a night alone for any reason, it will be ready.

Picking up a pillow she took off the pillowcase and two note books fell out, one landing on the bed, the other bouncing off and landing on the floor. The writing on the cover of the notebook on the bed was unlike any she had seen before.

No, she had seen it before. She had no idea how to read it, but she was sure she had seen it before. But no matter how much she thought about it, she had no idea where.

Memories that wanted to resurface tickled the back of her mind like an itch she couldn't reach. It was like something was holding them back and fragmenting others. The feeling was almost unbearable, as she felt whatever these memories were were important.

Bending over to pick up the one on the floor, she saw that some of the papers had been torn out and slipped back in. In the fall a few spread out around the floor. As she picked everything up she looked over the words.

Reading it didn't feel right; yet, she couldn't look away. It didn't completely make sense, and it didn't help that he occasionally switched from letters she knew to the odd symbols mid sentence.

She sat on his bed, trying to understand what she was reading. The best she could figure is these were his nightmares, and what she understood ranged from sad to terrible.

Curious, she opened the other notebook. At first she thought it might be a journal, as it recounted the events leading up to their life together. She considered getting him an actual journal when she quickly flipped through and saw this was not that different than the other note book.

There were entries about one or more people in his life dying. They were killed by an “anomaly”?

She thought for a moment and flipped to the entry of what was going on in their life. To Toriel's surprise the word “anomaly” was used there as well. The word seems to be used to address the human child.

It would be easier to make sense of all of this if he hadn't kept switching to the symbols and used code words. In the end, she figured these had to be his nightmares. Though a nagging feeling told her they weren't just dreams, at least to him. After all, that first entry had current events.

Remembering her conversation with Grillby, and how angry she got with the fire elemental, she started to feel guilty. As she idly flipped through, no longer paying attention to what was written, she considered writing Grillby an apology letter. That's when she saw something different than the other entries.

“more loops with the kid in the hallX5, did not see end this time. did not see trick.”

Then below that, written hastily.

“the brat killed me and came back to kill me again.”

Seeing those sent a shiver down her spine. This was something Toriel hoped Sans would want to discuss with her. If it meant what she thought it did… well, she wasn’t sure what it meant.

Closing the note books she set them on the dresser, placing them in the open so he knows she saw. By doing this, she hopes he will come to her to talk and not the other way around.

Turning back to the bed she finished stripping the sheets off and took them out to wash. After hanging them to dry she gathered clothing, washed and hung them to dry. All the while, that nagging feeling that she should have told him to stay safe gnawed at the back of her mind.

Toriel walked back inside, expecting to see Sans, but he wasn’t there. This was the longest he had been away. “Well, I’m sure he just lost track of time talking to friends,” she consoled herself as she tried to think of something else to do.

Walking into the kitchen, she noticed she was ringing her paws and forced herself to lower them. She then started to bake a pie, cinnamon butterscotch since the child was on her mind. Once it was in the oven to bake she started dusting in the sitting and dining room.

This was definitely too long. “No, no Toriel, you’re being silly. Sans is an adult. He can take all the time he wants.” A grown up who is clearly frail. “He can handle himself.” Who generally moves around quickly with his mysterious shortcuts, so he usually doesn’t take long. “Honestly, he falls asleep anywhere and time, plus he seemed tired before leaving. So he might have passed out mid tasks.”

The feeling of something being wrong haunted her as she took the pie out to cool. Again the thought came back, she should of told him to stay safe. “No, stop, you're being silly. What good would that have done.” While she gathered the clean laundry, and made the beds, her mind tried to convince her that he would of been more alert had she told him to stay safe.

Should she go on her walk? Toriel hadn't noticed she was biting her lip until the feeling of warm magic trickling down her chin caught her attention. Deciding to go, she wrote a note for Sans to let him know.

Of all the walks she has taken, this was definitely the fastest. All she really wanted to do was get back home and see Sans there. She didn’t spend long at the flowers, knowing they won't wilt if she skims over taking care of them for one day.

On the way back she hears gossip from monsters she passes. How news gets through her barrier, she will never know. As far as she knows it should be impossible considering her magic. Yet, that is how she learned of each child's death. And now, she learns of a commotion in Snowdin. Her soul sank and the icy grip of fear chilled it upon hearing this news in passing. Her body started to shiver as she tried to figure out if she should wait, run to Snowdin, or something else.

When she turned to ask for more details, the monsters fleed. It is no wonder, really. She asserted herself long ago, and made it clear she was to be left alone. Since then, all the monsters give her as much space as possible and avoid her the best they can.

Her stomach twisted in knots as she hurried home. “Sans?” She calls out, but received no reply.

Worried, Toriel grabbed her old cell phone and called Sans’s. Both rarely use them as they only really have each other to call. But Sans did say before that he would do his best to make sure it was charged and on when he was out on errands. But it just rang before going to voicemail. That didn’t put her mind at ease at all and she started to pace trying to figure out what she should do.

Feeling the need to do something, she walked downstairs and stood in front of the door. A nervous shiver crawled through her. Something was wrong, and she knew it. Yet if she leaves she could cause a lot of trouble if she is caught. But Sans should have been back a long time ago. If she was careful she could travel to Grillby’s unseen. She sure hoped that he had simply lost track of time talking with the elemental.

Before she could open the door, there was a knock…

  Nice view from this cliff, huh?