#“HEY SO I WAS ACTUALLY THE ONE WHO MADE MOST OF THE WIKI”

[rwbyuser24]

I think that I'm somewhat late. But I'm responding now because I used to be shy in responding. But hey! Better late than never.

I will start saying, well, isn't what the Wiki presents of her, truth?

"Even then, his flaws are folded in to his (alleged) positive traits; he is not afraid, extremely loyal, and has genuinely good intentions, despite the fact that the show has now proven that Ironwood’s flaws greatly outweigh these."

Let's consider that Ironwood have been for most of the part of show a hero. I guess that can influence. That and, isn't it truth what the wiki says about Ironwood? And even when his flaws end up outweighing his good traits, that was at the end of his life.

"These writers love Robyn, and have explored and extrapolated on her character to marvellous degree. Yet, at no singular point have any of these flaws ever been written quite as strongly as the wiki implies they are, nor have I seen much evidence of them myself in the show."

Well, I can think some works of fiction where Robyn shows negative traits. There was a rewrite by The-tired-bisexual-agenda who seems to be queer too. Anyway, the point is that since are fans, they probably are biased too. And about not seeing evidence of those traits in the show... Well, let's see about it!

"Her brashness is blamed for the outcome, but in reality, this outcome could have been avoided together if Clover had not chosen to follow his orders and bring in an innocent man. "

Well, Clover didn't initiate the fight. Clover said peacefully to Qrow that he was under arrest. And even Qrow said that they should wait till they arrive to Atlas to talk with Ironwood. Robyn initiated a fight in the manta. The problem isn't initiate the fight, the problem is the place. Is a closed space flying in the air. What if something end up happening and the ship falls? And even when it wasn't her fault, the fight end up resulting in the liberation of Tyrian. Again, she should have assumed that bad things were a risk. She could have wait till arriving to Atlas to talk to Ironwood or initiate the fight there instead of do that in a dangerous place.

"Also, she didn’t crash the Manta! That was all Tyrian!"

The article didn't say that she crashed the manta, it says that the fight initiated by her lead to that outcome.

"Yet, the people who enjoy her and the Happy Huntresses often perceive those same flaws to a significantly lesser extent, or even see those flaws as actually being boons of her character; for instance, reading her alleged arrogance as passion."

Again, also the fans are biased. About the arrogance, it's for celebrating her victory before time for example. She was so sure of her victory that she made a party, even Weiss and Ren point out how strange that was. There is also her saying: "Looks like he underestimated me. Again."

Like if she was such a great threat.

"I have a suspicion it’s to do with her character at large; she’s a bold socialist politician who believes in equality and fairness for all, who refuses to stand for incompetence and obedience towards evil causes."

Is she a socialist though? I mean, she believes in equality but I doubt she ever declared socialists ideals. I'm not sure either that the CRWBY is socialist, so I doubt that they wanted to present a socialist in such good focus.

"Likely, I’d rephrase a lot of it to be less damaging to her character; she isn’t hostile, she holds people accountable."

Except that she was willing to steal from the military truck even BEFORE losing the elections and Ironwood supposedly trying to kill her: "I think you've misjudged the situation. One way or another, these supplies are going to get where they're supposed to go - Mantle."

And again, initiating a fight in the wrong place.

"She isn’t quick to jump to conflict, she is familiar with how Atlas responds to anti-authority with violence. "

That still doesn't mean that she isn't quick to jump to conflict. And how exactly was Atlas dealing to anti-authority with violence in the past? I mean, Atlas let opposition appear in both Atlas (Jacques) and Mantle (Robyn). All the people that were arrested were people responsible for crimes: Stealing a manta, throwing a brick to a military ship, initiating riots. It just now that Ironwood was arresting people who oppose him.

"She isn’t arrogant, she believes in the power of the people as being the right thing to fight for."

Again, party and overestimating her capacities.

"not a fan of Robyn

not a fan of a new female character

not a fan of a new female character in a position of power

not a fan of a character with socialist/communist/antifa ideals

all of the above and then some???"

I guess that the first one. I mean, assume that someone doesn't like female characters due to the dislike to ONE female character... And again, when it was said that she is socialist/communist? And Antifa... maybe? I mean, Atlas was never fascist.

Well, that would be all!

what is going on with all the bias on robyn hill’s wiki page, anyway? - an aside

As someone who uses the RWBY wiki with some degree of frequency - often because I’m looking for art references, or Semblance and weapon names - I’m used to… some amount of bias in the articles for different characters? Like, let’s be real, it’s not a perfect wiki! Community-maintained stuff isn’t easy to all keep on the same track! But, generally, it gives the facts well enough and doesn’t do too bad a job keeping all the balls in the air when it comes to new information from all four corners of this franchise.

Well, until you open the article for Robyn Hill, and realise it’s an absolute disaster. Like, really; the impartial voice just plain doesn’t exist for her, and almost all of her wiki is written in such a way that she reads as being an absolutely insufferable, hostile, hard-to-like character. Even if you aren’t a fan of Robyn personally, you have to admit that if you hadn’t seen the show yourself, you might very well come away from her article presuming she’s a major antagonist of Volumes 7 and 8.

Like, for instance, let’s take a look at the first paragraph of her Personality section:

Robyn has a direct and confident personality, having no trouble being confrontational with Atlas personnel, including the Ace Operatives. Robyn also seems to suffer from overconfidence and arrogance, shown in her encounters with Ruby and celebrating her election victory before it was verified. She is aggressive and hostile in nature, quickly jumping to conflict without thinking through consequences. However, she is also shown to be reasonable when the situation calls for it.

And, for good measure, here’s another paragraph from the same section:

In ��With Friends Like These” Robyn displayed a rather impulsive side of her personality, when upon hearing that James Ironwood’s plan to abandon Mantle and arrest those against him, she started a fight between herself, Clover Ebi, and Qrow Branwen onboard a Manta with Tyrian Callows in custody. Despite the fact, there was no order or her arrest. Her brashness led to Tyrian breaking free and crashing the Manta as well as her becoming unconscious.

(Taken from Robyn’s RWBY Wiki page. Bolding is mine.)

Seguir leyendo

[youkaigakkou-tl]

Yohaji Character Survey 2024

With the release of the anime and the end of cour 1, I figured I'd do the character survey again! You can see last time's results here, which was in Oct 2022

I'll tally the results in about 2 weeks, before cour 2 starts (Jan 7), but the form will still stay open after that

Since last time, over 2 years ago, this blog's gone from around 100 followers to 600+, and I've made a twitter (which now has more followers than this blog. u guys r still my fave tho <3) so I wanna see if I can get a bigger sample size

Some funny numbers under the cut if you like numbers too

The 2022 poll had 22 responses at the time I tallied the results, but I never closed it and it now has 32 responses

Of which, the most recent responses are from.... THIS MONTH????? WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE WHERE DID U COME FROM

Takahashi stan who answered this month i respect u so much. me too same tbh

I don't actually remember how many followers I had at that point, the only milestone I know is 300 because I made this post. I was going to make this same joke for twitter too when i hit 300 there but it jumped from like 300 to 600 in like 2 weeks and I missed my chance lol

But anyway I think it was around 100 because at the time I tallied the results I remember thinking "hey 1/5 of my followers responded! pretty nice ratio!"

Some kinda irrelevant stats: Because I set up google SEO for the wiki, I get to see search trends and stats for it and yohaji in general!

Impressions (purple) is "how many people see the wiki in their google search results", which roughly equals "how many people are searching yohaji-related keywords" because the wiki is almost always on the first page of results anyway

Clicks (blue) is "how many people clicked on the link to the wiki in google search", or rather "how many people clicked on the miraheze wiki over the fandom one, either because google put it above or ppl already knew its the active one"

(Don't actually know what's going on on the fandom wiki nowadays, I don't check on it regularly, and a few weeks ago fandom staff revoked my admin and removed all the links to the miraheze wiki when they haven't cared for most of the year, presumably because the anime is driving up viewcounts for the fandom wiki too)

So sort of unexpectedly, it's actually trending upwards week by week!

For the spike on Nov 26, I have to assume that's because of one of those tiktoks that blowed up

The most searched character (that brought them to the wiki, at least) after Haruaki is..... RANMARU?????

After that, it's Ebisu, Miki, Sano and Oota, in that order, all roughly tied in clicks. Massive spike for Ebisu last week and then this week of course

For a long while pre-anime, 2 of the top queries that showed the wiki were Seiryuu and Suzaku, probably because they snuck into searches for those names from other anime lmao

[youling-the-ghost]

decided to check out the sfth discord for the first time in forever and came across several conversations about the fandom wiki and like. I got so happy for some reason lol. like yes hi there's a fandom wiki now yes I created it I'm glad you guys like it :D

[brooklynisher]

Hey all, you ever hear of Jaunty?

[x]

Do you WANT to learn more about Jaunty?

Well I dug deep, and found some things I never thought I could find. I'm really excited to share what I've found with y'all. This post is sort of a little journey of how I found Jaunty.

There's a few sections to this.

Skip to But where does Jaunty come from? If you just want answers

Is Jaunty even a real character?

Jaunty, from what I originally found, is SUPPOSEDLY a Steam Powered Giraffe character. But where have we seen this character before? Was it the comic? Was it the timeline? Maybe in a song cover? Does the band ever talk about Jaunty?

And to answer all of your questions, no! At least not that I knew of. The only source of Jaunty’s existence is here.

The Steam Powered Giraffe Wiki

So that makes this whole thing pretty complicated right? The wiki has info, and it’s not too inaccurate most of the time, but some of the lesser known/more nuanced information tends to get scuffed.

It really doesn’t help knowing that David has mentioned before that the information on the wiki wasn't that accurate.

What I’m saying is, the only proof we have for the existence of this character is on what might be one of the more unreliable sources of SPG information.

But despite that, this page is special in the fact that SUPPOSEDLY it was uploaded by Steam Powered Giraffe themselves!

[x]

However, there isn’t really much of any information on this user at all. All we know is that they founded this wiki, added a few characters and a bit of information, and then became inactive. Really our biggest reasoning for believing that this was an actual SPG member is the fact that they are the founder and have been around for a very long time.

Okay, suspicions aside, let’s see what I found about this thing.

What the wiki tells us

One, this image was touched by the founder of this wiki twice, it was uploaded in 2011, and in 2014 they protected the page, which means only the administrators can edit the page.

[x]

Both are pretty major years for SPG being the year Upgrade left the band and the year Rabbit transitioned, but there’s not many connections you can make with that.

This user was first active in 2010 and last seen in 2015 [x]

Cool dates to have, but not a lot to work with. It mainly gives us a clear vision of what SPG was looking like at the time of the creation of this page. I can see this thing being used for a special, slightly themed show.

Of course, the information the wiki alone offers is very limited, but we know two things for sure. One, this character is a robot being under the category of robots, and two, these photos were taken by Cineria.

[x]

So, here's the problem, you'd think that by having the name of the photographer, we could get far with that, but unfortunately, it is such a vague name, that there is just no way we could figure out who Cineria actually is. It really doesn't help that they don't seem to be a professional photographer. The only page I could find that connects both the name Cineria and Steam Powered Giraffe is this one.

Useless information

I started searching for stuff by reverse searching it. It wasn't really successful, as I was expecting, but I did find one thing.

A different source.

This source doesn't go anywhere must you know. The ORIGINAL site, florist.buketbunga.com is still up an active serving as an Indonesian site for selling flowers, but this very specific link is broken, and the Wayback Machine doesn't know a thing about it.

The good news is, the link title alone gives us a ton of stuff to work with! Appropriately, the last part of this link translates to "Flower Bouquet Florist Shop Address Nearest 24 Hours Online", which makes sense.

What DOESN'T make sense is everything else coming before it. Specifically the Team Fortress 2 Wiki. This made me believe that someone used these sites to create a scam link, but it's weird because somehow, it's relevant?

Yandex was able to match these images of Jaunty to this site, and what's crazier, Jaunty is in the title of the link! But it's not just Jaunty, it's the Jaunty Explorer.

I did some searching, and discovered that the Jaunty Explorer originates from a TF2 livestream charity event called Tip of the Hats! Donations can earn you medals known as the Jaunty Explorer ($10 Donations), the Jaunty Ranger ($30 Donations), and the Jaunty Mountaineer ($100 Donations). They can come in many different color variations, but here are the main ones.

[x] [x] [x]

There are TWO connections between this and SPG. One, the shared name of Jaunty, and two, hats. Steam Powered Giraffe is pretty big on hats. But, bad news, these are completely unrelated. Main reasoning? The image of Jaunty was posted to the wiki back in 2011, while Tip of the Hats as an event started back in 2013. Can't even take the "SPG was inspired by TF2" route with that.

Okay, but what even IS it?

Now we get into the visual aspect of this!

I tried to see if there was at least any way to identify what this is, but that solely relies on observational skills. There are two images of this thing, but the image with the blue background is much easier to make out.

[x]

There's a lot that's going on with the design of Jaunty. Unfortunately, I'm not smart enough to identify what half of the doodads are. This machine, whether it's an actual machine or just a prop, is definitely a one of a kind as I couldn't find anything like this.

I talked with @boneinator about this, and he was able to read the text: "STAND CLEAR!" on the top of the doors of this machine which lead him to believe that it might be a time machine of sorts.

What we both managed to agree on when it came to the design of this thing however, was that it looks like a cabinet.

Now, like I said, this thing has a one of a kind design, so it's not going to look exactly like one thing or another, but it has similar features to other things such as to this cabinet

[x]

Two longer doors on the upper half, and two smaller doors/drawers on the bottom. Is that actually what it is? I didn't know, but there is a resemblance.

One thing that's REALLY interesting about this machine is the intense amount of steam it lets out.

[x]

So it's definitely a very active machine.

But where does Jaunty come from?

Something I've been wondering is how much of this is actually connected to SPG.

Is it theirs? Is this a part of a bigger thing? Is it just associated with them?

A bigger thing. There is one example of a big SPG show that comes to mind, and it was not just them.

During their 15 Year Anniversary Livestream, the band was asked about their favorite memories. Bunny mentions that one of her favorite memories was at a show called Clockwork Vaudeville. This was one of the band's first time having a massive audience. According to her, this was a time traveling show, and they performed alongside others.

I looked into it and found that the full name of this performance is called Clockwork Vaudeville Circus Cabaret. And there, I found a little advertisement for it as well!

The Kickstarter for this show started in late 2010

I did some more searching and realized there is a bunch of video from this show out there though all these clips are recorded at random intervals. Assuming that the uploader posted these clips close to the date of the actual show, we can see that this show took place in February of 2011!

About one month after this show, this page was added to the wiki.

I checked the clips, and guess what.

[x]

Right there in the corner, there was Jaunty.

But that's not all

Not only have a found a video that contained Jaunty, I found a video that contained Jaunty in action!

[x]

Unbelievably enough, it was a video of the band performing Honeybee alongside a pole dancer. And thanks to the title, we now know that this show took place February 19, 2011

Which all this confirms 100% that Jaunty IS a time machine.

Now with all things considered, Jaunty is not necessarily an "SPG character" as in they didn't create it. It's hard to say if Jaunty is even a character at all at this point! But it does exist in their world and they actively interact with it!

Who cheered? I cracked the code!

[relaxxattack]

you are so very homestuck knowledgeable. when you have the time and should inspiration strike, please tell all your headcanons about oliveblood trolls.

ooo what a great question! for this one i think first we'd need to break down current stereotypes about olivebloods. there's actually not much that we're given about them tbh

according to the homestuck wiki, which is based on info from both the comic and more dubiously canon things like friendsim and hiveswap, the olive caste's two singular traits seem to be "wild animal" and "romance liker". both of these, obviously, are traits pulled from our wonderful main girl nepeta, who was the singular representation of the olive caste for a long time; alongside her dancestors. which is quite cute, who doesn't love nepeta?

the thing is though that i am one of those nitpicky people who likes to say, "well, hey now, nepeta isn't actually representative of her caste at ALL." in fact, none of the beta trolls are. i honestly feel like it should be assumed that just like the beta kids, the beta trolls are weirdos, and not really the 'norm' in their society.

nepeta lives out in the wilderness very specifically away from society in a way that is remarked on as being unusual even for someone of her color; and she does not even understand what role her caste would have given her in normal society. and i mean... considering aradia tavros and sollux are LOWER than nepeta, it doesn't really make sense for them all to have nicer houses than her unless she's unusual in her situation.

^ nepeta is in fact NOT a good representation of olivebloods.

which means... no, i don't think all olive trolls are romance obsessed wilderness girls, actually, sorry, hiveswap friendsim, i have to shelve you from my alternia analysis for now.

luckily, there ARE other olivebloods in the series!

first of all, the other leijons. unfortunately, none of them are really "good" examples either. meulin is from an entirely different planet, and disciple is from an ancient history perhaps even less representative of "normal" life than nepeta is. all we really get from them is stuff we already knew from nepeta-- the wildness, the relationship interest. with an added fact that both meulins seem to be somewhat bookish.

and so who does that bring us to? the final canonical oliveblood.

that's right.

troll will smith.

troll will smith is canonically an oliveblood. not only that, but he's a famous actor, which means he is basically a "model" for society- for what it looks like once you "have it all made". i would imagine this goes even more for alternia, supposedly a very movie-geared society.

the two troll will smith features that canonically exist on alternia are Fresh Prince and Hitch. in both of these films, will smith plays a character that is self-made and clever, a regular guy who is just skilled. it should also be noted that while a "threshecutioner" is a job with a heavy blueblood populous, greenbloods can also be one, and it's common enough that a show about it wasn't cut by the alternian dictatorship.

so therefore, what traits can we pull that all of these olivebloods (and equius lol) display to us?

olive trolls are lower class, but they're capable of working up through their connections

likely due to this, olive trolls are often clever and self made. they're likely quick-witted and sharp

they're good at their jobs! most olive trolls that are seen in the comic are very good with their respective practices (be it drawing, writing, bookkeeping, or melee fighting)

it's possible that olive trolls have a good intuition, and are fairly in touch with their own instincts. this would explain why some of them seem to fare better in the wild or in fights, and also why they are stereotyped as having a natural inclination for relationships. i think this is also a good transition ground between the impressive physical psionics of the castes lower than olive, and the emotional/mental psionics of the highbloods above them.

so, there we go. these are my olive headcanons! they're not comfortably well off or anything, but they're not wild animals either-- they're hard workers and skilled at what they put their minds to. probably usually working a nine to five and doing their best in life hoping to move up with a good quadrant or promotion. at least, in my headcanon anyway- no need to take this as fact!

[seelestia]

— ❝𝐎𝐇 𝐌𝐘 𝐆𝐎𝐒𝐇, 𝐘𝐎𝐔'𝐑𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘 𝐌𝐘 𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍!❞

SUMMARY. "oh my gosh, you're literally my dream person!" here's a list of red flags for you, honey. (inspired by a tiktok trend! the one with the soundboard, iykyk.)

CHARACTERS. wanderer, alhaitham, albedo, childe + GN!reader.

GENRE. full-on crack, some fluff, not-so serious and light-hearted character slander.

CW. has heavy refs to albedo's story / 2.3 event and wanderer's story, brief mentions of blood in childe's part (not detailed/graphic), one brief mention of kissing in wanderer's part, light cussing and terrible humor. + read the alt text on the headers for extra captions, hehe!

THOUGHTS. this is my most unserious work yet and for that, i apologize if this gets too unhinged or inaccurate at some point LMAOOO. red flags are fine, red is my fav color anyway (it's actually light purple) <33 can you guess who's the favorite here 🧍‍♂️

✰ masterlist.

[ WANDERER ]

❝Dream person, huh? That's oddly fitting because the day you win me over is only gonna happen in your dreams too.❞

Has some abandonment and mother issues. ...Yeah. These issues may result in emotional walls as strong and firm as the Great Wall of China but when you break through them, he's never ever gonna let you go (unfortunately). I'd tell you to start running but this silly guy can float and zoom in the air, so best of luck.

You'll only hear crickets if you fall asleep on his chest. On the very rare occasions where he allows you to, that is. If you're into that romantic "falling asleep on your lover's chest while listening to their heartbeat" stuff, you're not getting it with Wanderer here. But if you listen hard enough, maybe you'll get to hear termites or something because he's canonically made out of white wood. (I'm joking, I love him too.)

Terrible with feelings. He'd rather jump off a cliff than start talking about his feelings. ...Okay, fine. Harboring humane emotions is an annoyingly blurry line that he has vowed to stop caring about after regaining his memories. It doesn't mean he doesn't cringe at himself every now and then, though — knowing that he has talked about his feelings to someone else (only you and Nahida) keeps him up at night, as embarrassing as it is to admit. ("Hey, do you remember that one time when you told me—" "I don't.")

May prioritize his pride over you sometimes. Let's take a rainy day as an example. It's pouring cats and dogs which means that the risk of catching a cold is high as ever... thus, as the rain begins to soak you, you turn to your companion (whose clothes are saved by the hat on his head) with puppy eyes. His reply comes in the same speed as a lightning strike; "No," he says. Beg and cry if you want, he is not letting you under his hat because it's "not a damn parasol". Fine, maybe he just doesn't care about your well-being and that's totally fine (sarcastic) — but the very next second, as he grabs your wrist and starts dashing to a nearby inn with you in tow — you can't help but let a small smile slip. Maybe he does care? Pride just gets in the way sometimes.

Might accidentally suffocate you when you two kiss because how the heck is he supposed to remember that humans need to breathe when your lips are just so soft for no reason? Ugh, humans and their ridiculous needs (derogatory but he still loves you simp).

Has a long list of crimes and felonies that we don't talk about. Ah, yes, the courtesy of being a previous Fatui Harbinger, indeed. Irminsul may have forgotten about this list, but the Wiki sure as heck hasn't.

[ ALHAITHAM ]

❝So, you consider me someone who fits your type? I see. Unfortunately, knowing whether or not I fit into another person's ideals doesn't have much value to me.❞

Books > people. Is that really a flaw? He doesn't think it is. Books are a source of knowledge and aren't they supplements that enrich the minds of those who read them? Not to mention, there is no need to cater to whatever social standards with inanimate objects unlike when you're around people. ...But apparently, Kaveh told him that this mindset "makes him look like an absolute loner with no social skills and no friends whatsoever" to which he'd usually bite back with an "at least, I have a stable housing." TLDR: books are Alhaitham's closest friends and that's a little sad (he doesn't care about other people's opinions, though).

Unreachable when his soundproof headphones are on. Shush, he is in his official (but not-so-official) 'Do Not Disturb' mode. Sorry in advance, he may or may not accidentally ignore you when his soundproof headphones are on. If you want to have a few words with him, either be patient and wait or make sure they're of absolute importance lest you risk being given the deadliest, emptiest stare ever known to mankind. If looks could kill, you would've keeled on the spot. Instant unintentional (??) homicide, so true of him.

Awkward with small talks. Alhaitham is good at talking about topics that really matter and he very much prefers it that way too. But that's the thing; when the discussion of that particular subject ends, that's it. He often dodges the silence in a 'cool' way, though; either by taking an early leave or bringing out a book if the situation there still needs him present. (In his defense, if no one wants to start and carry the conversation, then isn't it a bit hypocritical to count on him to do that too?)

Physical affection stupefies him (it'll take time). Alhaitham doesn't hate it, no, but something about it just doesn't align much with his sense of familiarity. He usually keeps his distance; even with new acquaintances, shaking hands has never been his thing and it's been a long time since Alhaitham has had someone he feels comfortable enough to receive physical affection from or to give some of it to (his grandmother was the last, maybe). By all means, this isn't meant to be a sob story — it's just brought up to explain that physical affection is a thing he's not familiar with, so it'll take some time to get used to. Good luck to those with physical touch as a preferred love language (me), this feeble scholar who may turn into a stiff log when you hug him is in your capable hands!

[ ALBEDO ]

❝Is that a compliment of some kind? I must say it's certainly not one I hear very often, thus I feel inclined to appreciate it all the more. Thank you.❞

Has a lab located in Dragonspine. Yes, this is a red flag because look me in the eyes and tell me you would realistically travel up that death trap of a mountain every single time just to spend time with him. He comes down from the mountain at least twice or thrice a month, so you'll still get to see his pretty face regardless, just not as frequently — so, it's either you exchange letters every week or you go trekking up Dragonspine to see him yourself. (There is a better place to die on than that wretched mountain, but I digress.)

His mother caused world destruction and he has a twin brother that is out for blood (Imposterbedo). ...Seriously, what the heck is going on in this family? We need to keep an eye on them like they're fascinating wild animals on National Geographic, for real. If you don't mind crazy in-laws that might commit felonies against you (also looking intently at Alice as I say this, by the way), then you're all good to go! Aha, just watch your back and be safe out there, comrade.

Babysitting Klee comes as a 2-in-1. If you're good with kids, great! If you're not, good luck! You know what they all say; a child's curiosity is only limited by the skies (and a guardian's supervision), so be prepared for when Klee starts tugging you around to go fish blasting or exploring with her. Being with Albedo means you get to see her a lot and she's such an adorable ball of sunshine! But the way she innocently hands you a little bomb like it's a slice of Fisherman's Toast and not a weapon is certainly something to remember, huh? (At this point, this is basically an extra to my previous point about questionable in-laws.)

Eats spiders (not often, but has eaten them and that's concerning). Granted this only applies to a specific type of large spiders that can be found at the roots of Petrified Trees in Domains (in the words of the Chief Alchemist himself), but there will definitely be a time where he goes: "Are you hungry? If I remember correctly, there are still some smoked spiders left from the other day. Fortunately, the temperature here in Dragonspine aids in the preservation method—" Spiders can be cute to some and a nightmare to some, but the fact that he has a whole recipe for it really makes you want to know the how and most importantly, the why. Does he sprinkle parsley on them or some stuff like that, ayo? (at least, if you ever get stuck in a domain one unlucky day, this recipe might help you survive? thanks??)

[ CHILDE ]

❝Oh? I've never been called a dream person before. ...Heh, that sounds new, I like the sound of that!❞

Thinks combat and battles are a better substitute for oxygen. Okay, that may be somewhat of an exaggeration — but it isn't an understatement to say that the thought of challenge rushes the blood into Tartaglia's veins. Not one for the secretive schemes most Harbingers do, this man would even go charging ahead if that guarantees he'll encounter a good fight. Like seriously, if he and a fellow Harbinger are heading to a place where there is a good opponent, you bet Childe is about to speed there first. You could say he is speeding towards uncertain death, essentially.

Might have come home with blood on his cheek once or twice. And what's worse is that this guy probably doesn't even realize it's there. Sorry, he was just too caught up in the moment to properly notice any leftover 'trophies' from his previous fights... Aha, don't worry about it! ("I'm home!" Tartaglia cheers loudly as he, quite literally, throws open the front door to your shared home — only to be greeted by that dumbfounded look on face. "Please tell me that's just juice on your cheek," you frown. He scratches the side of his neck awkwardly, "Uhh. Things didn't go particularly well when I was collecting debts.")

A warrior in the streets, also a malewife who can make you treats. Why does he have that double side for, huh? For other people to swoon over and fall for? No way someone can be a househusband and a good fighter simultaneously. What do you mean he can cook and clean then beat up anyone who threatened you the next? And you're saying he is genuine about it too? I say deception, deception, deception! Sue this fellow for fraud this instant. (This might actually be a green flag in disguise, but you didn't hear that from me.)

No good with saving money. He's stinky rich and most of it might be from the Fatui. You have to wonder whether each Mora he gives goes on the Fatui's tab or something like that... You don't find the idea of owing something to the Fatui fun, but it's so ironic how you're more worried about this than the Eleventh Harbinger is. Welp, at least, you don't have to worry incessantly about saving money now...? ("There's that thing you said you wanted to buy the other day, right? Here you go, honey!" "Tartaglia, why is this Mora pouch heavier than a toddler—")

Has a long list of crimes and felonies that we don't talk about #2. You could definitely argue that Childe might have the least mind-boggling list of crimes amongst the Harbingers all, though. (And does he slay for that? Who knows.)

─ ⊹ ⊱ ・・・・・・☆・・・・・・・⊰ ⊹ ─

© SEELESTIA, mar 2023. do not repost, plagiarize, translate nor claim as your own.

✰ TAGLIST: @meimeimeirin @hcikazu @tsuk4sa-yug1 @catcze @semi-orangeapple @yuuki4646 @d-a-r-k-s-w-a-n @daisydkj @omgscaramouche @coquettemaiden @lemontum @herdrops @lleoll @xiaosonlybeloved @chiisananingen @irethepotato @ainescribe @blooodyvampy @starlightaura @jihyuniepark @duhsies @maybemiko @lordbugs — [ bolded names are unable to be tagged (check your settings!) + register here to be a part of my taglist! ]

[lowkeyrobin]

QSMP ; how much their eggs like you

includes ; tubbo & sunny, wilbur & tallulah, charlie & juanaflippa, quackity & tilin, jaiden & empanada and philza & chayanne

warnings ; language, mentions of parental neglect

AN ; I'm not like super into qsmp yet, so bare with me, ik most of them have like multiple parents/caregivers but I picked the ones I know the most about and the qsmp wiki is currently my life saver. the eggs are so cute so I can't not wrkte a little something about them 💔💔💔💔 I apologize bc this is gonna be so ooc... also ik juanaflippa and tilin died but ignore that

masterlist

TUBBO & SUNNY

Sunny is very iffy about you at first

"pa, who is that?"

"uhhh... that's y/n" Tubbo answers, "my partner"

she stares at both of you for a second like 🤨😒

they think their dislike of themselves of others is totally unfair and only relies on a select few people so trying to get used to you in a whole story in itself

tubbo, charlie, lenay, and polispol do their best to try and tell her "Hey they're cool, sunny, it's okay, they love you!!" but she won't budge

takes her a long while to accept you into the lil family but she ends up loving you

money is the way to their heart

if only anyone had told you sooner...

WILBUR & TALLULAH

tallulah instantly loves you

she's very quiet around you at first and hides behind will but quickly gets used to your presence

she's just a little anxious at first yk

"I love pa's new partner :3"

she loves playing the flute for you and talking about star wars with you it's the cutest thing

like you'll just be watching over her for Will or Phil and she's just so comfortable talking about her passions with you

Tallulah loves reassuring your builds and likes helping you as well, if you're unsure of how something looks, she's quick to reassure you that it looks good!

she gets you little gifts and shit it's the most adorable thing

her desire for validation mostly drives her kindness to you but she does actually appreciate you a lot

you seem to be there when no one else is and she frequently gives you 'I love you's and little flowers and stuff

she has abandonment issues so you make sure to always check behind yourself to make sure she's still following you

you refuse to leave her anywhere

always looks at you with a 😊 or 🤩 no explanation

she always refers to you as 'ma/pa' or a special nickname. like a syllable of your actual name or smthn, like something special for you two lol

you constantly tell and reassure each other that you're so awesome, great dynamic honestly

CHARLIE & JUANAFLIPPA

She's very quiet and reserved, but obedient

that automatic obediencey grew as a part of her and she just automatically accepted you into the family

although charlie and mariana were very negligent parents, she still trusted them and did as they said

you were the total opposite

it was what she wanted with you two, she has the freedom

you constantly argue w charlie over being a neglectful parent (character not irl)

she's very brave and courageous, and knows how to stay positive

you have personal beef w her parents bc they're such asses to her /hj

she loves guns.

she teaches you how to use guns as well

bonding time in the enclosure 🤞🤞🤞

she lived a short life but she's literally a part of you now

QUACKITY & TILIN

very sweet and caring but also chaotic and edgy

you showed her love and she CLUNG to you

"y/n is my favorite person, not you, pa"

they were always looking to give and receive love to/from everyone but quackity made it so hard for them

even after expressing being mad at quackity for not paying attention to them, they still loved him

shit broke your heart

he literally died bc of neglect from quackity bruh

constantly fighting w quackity over them being neglected :( (character not irl)

all they wanted was love man

you did your best to show her love and make memories with her since quackity clearly barely wanted to

quackity promised he'd be a better dad but uh...

towards the end of their life, they started getting depressed and stuff, you obviously noticed

you just laid on the floor with him, listening to all he had to say, just being there for him

anyways this is getting sad

they love you so much, tells you constantly that they love you and appreciate you

cutie patootie

JAIDEN & EMPANADA

em is very loving, instantly accepts you into the family, although a little cautious at first

you make her sweet foods all the time

absolutely loves you sm

always repays you with flowers or little treasures

"I got you flowers, ma/pa!"

she has a passion for baking with Niki, so sometimes you three (Niki and Em + you watching or burning the house down) have little baking days

jaiden just watching you guys be silly and do dumb shit like "I think I won with this one, guys"

you and jaiden spoiling the hell out of her LMAO

PHILZA & CHAYANNE

used to be more quiet but now talks a lot more

very energetic, your energies match perfectly

very responsible, looks over you if anything

he's always eager for adventure so you guys go explore often while phil and missa are busy

teaches you combat tricks and tips

literally a walking 'top 5 best combat tips and tricks' video I swear

he's very confident as well, likes to pvp with wooden swords with you

he always wins

you aren't even trying to let him win, he's just a god

I mean he's being raised by Phil and Missa so it makes sense LMAO

"I want pvp with y/n :("

"chayanne, they're not online, I'm sorry"

[survivalove]

debunking lies zutara shippers say about the atla creators & writers

disclaimer: this is in no way an endorsement or defense of bryke or anyone mentioned. literally just debunking false statements i see spread throughout and outside the fandom as it pertains to kataang

1. that bryke made kataang endgame because the nice guy should get the girl

this is something I see often usually linked with this video of a man ⬇️ who they claim to be bryan/mike echoing this sentiment.

this man is in fact john o’bryan, one of the three known zk shippers in the writers’ room (we’ll expand on this in point 5) talking about how he saw aang. not the creators. so of course it shouldn’t surprise anyone that he doesn’t even like kataang in the first place.

2. that bryke made kataang endgame last minute and zutara was the original pairing

bryan and mike (notice how i’m using both of their names separately. this too will be important in the next point) have talked about how kataang was planned since they originally wrote the show.

they have also talked ad nauseam in a video (which I will not share here cuz it made a lot of ppl angry) about why they do not like zutara and its shippers, so this entire point is bogus.

++ the reason why they say zk was the original pairing is because of one of the zk writers (joshua hamilton) wrote this in the atla fun facts that used to run on tv. (we’ll get into him later) those atla fun facts contain a lot of inaccurate/non canon “facts” which you can check and verify on avatar wiki if you know what i’m talking about.

3. that aang is bryke’s self insert (specifically mike)

yeah, here’s where the separation becomes important. bryan (L) and mike (R) are two different men. mike has never said that aang was his self-insert, nor has he directly talked about relating to aang. bryan, however, constantly talks about how much he relates to zuko. even, going as far to say he tries to think like zuko when he writes characters and shows.

the only time mike has come close to saying he relates to aang is when dante said he thinks mike is more like aang while bryan is more like zuko, and they, mostly bryan, agreed. (mike has actually said he relates to korra more than aang but hey) bryan also is the one who drew mike’s beard on adult aang because he considered it a nice reference to his friend. this is the main reason why shippers ran with that self-insert narrative because half the time, they think bryke is actually one person ☠️

++ in fact, aang’s original character design is based off the mixed black-chinese son of sifu kisu

4. that atla was supposed to have a season 4 where katara and zuko got together

this is mostly something that has come out of a fabricated interview by the head writer, aaron ehasz. he was allegedly asked what he would have liked to do if given the chance to write a fourth season of the show and talked about an azula redemption arc among other things. zutaras then made up a whole fake interview including that he wanted to make the two characters endgame.

ehasz then came out to say that most of these “interviews” were faked and that he has never talked about having a preference for any ship. if you go on his twitter, you will see him talking about an azula redemption arc tho.

as for atla having a 4th season at all, it was never intended. the creators, the music composers have all said at various points in time, the show was written and pitched as three seasons, three elements.

5. that most of the other writers shipped zutara and bryke’s authoritarianism shut it down

as I said above, only three writers on the original show have come out to say they preferred zk at some point. atla has had a total of 21 staff writers. 3 out of 21 is not most if you ask me.

as for bryke (yes now i’m using the shorthand cuz i proved my point earlier) being authoritarians, no writer or staff that has worked with them on the show has said this so…? idk where that came from but i’m not here to back them up just mention facts.

6. that all the women who worked on the franchise shipped zutara while only men shipped kataang

atla has very few female staff as it is:

5 writers (elizabeth welch: zk; others: unknown)

1 director (unknown)

5 storyboard/character artists (lauren montgomery: ka; elsa garagarza: ka; angela song mueller: zk; others: unknown)

1 comic writer (faith erin hicks: ka)

2 comic artists (gurihiru: ka)

++ mae whitman (katara’s voice actress) has expressed her like for both ships throughout the years.

so i’m not sure what defines all and only for some ppl but those definitions are not in my dictionary. disclaimer: i’m not declaring anyone here as a shipper in any official sense. this is just based off statements they have made that you can google!

7. that katara is written poorly in post-atla content because of kataang/bryke

I mean the first part isn’t really a lie, more of an opinion which I can agree with to an extent.

why I mention this here is because zks will not only go on a tangent and link the misogyny in the writing to a m/f ship and say the other m/f ship would have been more feminist…

but they also refuse to hold all the men involved accountable. like I said, 3 known atla writers shipped zk and 2 of them (joshua & john) were men (who would’ve thought men could like a ship and it could still be considered feminist 😃). they were also 2 out of only 4 atla writers that came back for legend of korra, outside of the creators. (19 to 4 ☠️ no comment). these shippers very well know this and instead of holding these men accountable for the misogynistic writing, they instead brag about them shipping it and ask them about zk whenever they have the chance.

another example is gene luen yang, a comic writer who again shipped zk (another man GASPPPPP) responsible for the first 5 comic books. everyone knows his comics suck in terms of characterization, particularly katara’s. in fact zutaras have made multiple threads on how poor the writing is. funnily enough, they always fail to mention that gly was the script writer or acknowledge his part in this mischaracterization, while bragging about him shipping zk in other posts. ironic.

meanwhile, bryke have never offered writers’ commentary on any of gly’s comics besides the search - mike (because they were mostly writing legend of korra during his run.)

basically these shippers don’t care about misogyny or holding male writers accountable if they ship zk which is funny because I thought it was… for the female gaze? why are you hyping men shipping it anyway? confusion.

[slugtranslation-hypmic]

Hello,

Is there any way you could translate Samatoki's newest solo, Rinka/Blue Flame? I've been looking for a translation everywhere, but cannot seem to find one.

Best regards and thank you very much.

Oh my God I am desperate slug-san, please please pleaaasee tell me you know where to find a translation of Samatoki's Rinka/Blue Flame!! OTL I was so surprised a translator wasn't already linked in the wiki which is where I usually look first & then I couldn't find anything by searching on twitter or google or tumblr and I just really wanna know what his song is about!! T°T I can't believe I found a translation of Honobono's song but not of Samatoki's song?? I must be doing sth wrong.. Help :')

Hey slug-san! A follow-up of the Rinka/Blue Flame message. I've searched some more, and I think there's actually no translation of it so far anywhere.. T~T Would you be willing to translate it? A standard/literal translation with a lil clean-up like you did with Akuma no Hana would be totally alright!! Thank you so much for giving us the opportunity to engage with Hypmic in a way the official creators haven't made possible yet! :D <3

Sure. Under a cut for length.

I'm running at a speed faster than grief, going so fast I leave even the smallest bad feelings behind me. I spit on my dead-end future, spit in the dirty puddles. Now I'm clinging to the guardrail, tears tracing scribbled lines down my cheeks. I bet it looks pretty comical. C'mon, laugh at me, why don't you? Let's start somewhere around the unhappy ending. Why not? Works for me. The clear, blue sky waits for sunset; but to hell with that. I don't need that crap! Let's do whatever we damn well please, here in this vacant city. Just the thought of them makes me light up a cigarette. Look, I don't wanna tell people we gotta fight each other to get what we want. I just think we have to, because there's things out there that're worth keeping safe. There's a stray dog baying at the rain streaking down the glass, and that SOB won't shut up. Hey, fuck your umbrella. Who needs that kinda crap? Throw it away and let the rain drench you too. The beat's entrenched in my soul, a stupid requiem for this unfair world we live in, lying on its sickbed. C'mon, get in there and pay your respects to it. You don't have the time to sit around feeling sorry for yourself. You know lashing out's the answer, right? You'll be okay. And I'm not gonna tell you you're running from your responsibilities. So c'mon. Quit your sniveling and come ride with me. The brakes don't work; those emotions never get any slower. And we're burning ourselves out, but don't let that stop you from coming along with me for the ride. Ride with me through thick and thin. Ride with me all the way to the grave.

A few final notes:

Sunset is a metaphor for melancholy. When Samatoki rejects that in the third verse, he's rejecting sitting through his feelings of loss. He uses this image again later in the line I wrote as "sit around feeling sorry for yourself."

The gender and plurality of the "them" Samatoki thinks about isn't specified. While it's most likely referring to his family, the verse immediately afterward sounds like a direct reference to Ichirou and Samatoki battling to save their siblings in the TDD breakup.

"We're burning ourselves out" could also be written like "We're burning ourselves down to ash" which connects with the cigarette image.

Given the prevalence of stray dogs in hardboiled/yakuza fiction and their recurrence as an image in Samatoki's other raps, the stray dog should be understood to be Samatoki himself.

[sillyfudgemonkeys]

Hei-Ran Analyst: "In defense of Hei-Ran?"

So like....Not to EXCUSE Hei-Ran of killing her cousin or other people in Agni Kais........but like....I dunno why but it feels like her talk about honor in SoK might paint a damning picture as to WHY she did that. And I REALLY need myself a Kuruk novel or something TT0TT

(under the cut because it gets long, also sorry I'm all over the place/word vomitty but ahhhhh Hei-Ran!)

Between her being cleared AND her words in SoK, it makes me wonder if there was more stuff at stake than her being "headmistress".

Huazo mentions that Agni Kais have been fought to the death before, so I wonder if there's different levels (where they agree on death or not). Maybe that played a role in Hei-Ran's bad reputation? She agreed to no "out right kills" but "accidental" kills were allowed. (the wiki says they are rarely fought to the death pre-Sozin's rule....so maybe death is just the most extreme?)

I wonder if Junsik had anything to do with it? Of course they don't say if that's when she became headmistress, or if she was just a teacher. There's also the flashback chapters with Kuruk, I don't think Hei-Ran was dropping relatives and countrymen like flies (at least at the rate to get that rumor about her) when she was traveling with him. It'd kinda go against his whole "my friends were so good and bright." It had to have happened after they fell apart.

There's also this, to be fair it's the Earth Kingdom, but IMAGINE if it was the Fire Nation:

Like, Jianzhu baby, I don't think she resisted any temptation, at least in her OWN country. I think she very much scorched holes....but into people's eyeballs, not into the ceiling. TT0TT You know, the same country where "they fight at the smallest slight to their name and family?"

Combine that with the Sei'Naka's being so small and being an exporters of people('s talents):

I dunno. I feel like it's a perfect storm of an absolutely horrible situation. TT0TT I dunno if Junsik is a distant relative within the Sei'Naka clan OR if he married into it, but I'm pretty sure they heavily hinted that Hei-Ran is the one from the Sei'Naka clan (Kuruk's first flashback in SoK mentions his original firebender companion being a Sei'Naka man and that Hei-Ran was his "younger relative."

So combine Hei-Ran being raised in that "do or die" clanhood, and mix it in with people being RIGHT FUCKING CREEPS to her (and later her young daughter, and lord knows she's been dealing with it since SHE was that young). In a nation where the smallest slight can put you in a burn match that could sometimes result in death. And then combined ALL OF THAT, with the "sometimes you gotta lay down your own honor for what's right."

I can totally see her "accidentally" killing someone in an Agni Kai if it meant protecting herself or someone else. Maybe not ALL of them, but I thin it's more interesting to have it be grey with a lot of them. I mean it's the only thing that makes sense, esp if her "honor was still kept intact!"

....I was gonna end it there but one last point that's kind of a side tangent (that kinda loops back to this). She's def a hardass but I don't think she's as cruel as she's portrayed most of the time. Like she has this moment:

Which, to loop back around, makes me go:

"Hei-Ran what the fuck did you go through growing up????"

But then we get to the end of the chapter:

For all the talk she made about maiming students she 1) held the fuck back from doing so, only warn him with her words. 2) when it came down to it, she was obviously NOT down for Jianzhu maiming Yun. She was complicit, but she obviously showed discomfort for it.

If not for Jianzhu, I don't thinks he would've done it. She's all talk, she's not the type to actually maim students. And I think Rangi is the perfect example. If Hei-Ran was really that horrible, someone who would kill family members and maim students..... then why isn't Rangi marked up? Kyoshi makes special mention (from what she's seen of Rangi) that Rangi has no marks.

"Rangi's her daughter" And yet Hei-Ran killed a cousin. Rangi was also her student. Rangi also has a horrible temper, like throwing furniture kind of temper. To the point Hei-Ran isn't surprised/phased when it happens. (considering the BS Rangi's gone through, and since it's more so played for laughs, I don't blame Rangi kjfdlsaj TT0TT)

It's just, if Hei-Ran is really that horrible, Yun and Rangi would be a lot more worse for wear.

Again, this isn't to fully excuse Hei-Ran, she's done horrible things (aka not stopping Jianzhu and other stuff). She very much acknowledges her own shortcomings, and even goes about to do what she can to fix her own sins. But I think there's just a lot of interesting grey area stuff just....hidden under the surface. And I think that makes her a really interesting character.....And I really want that explored.

Tldr; Can I have a Kuruk novel please? 0w0

[emerynn]

MAX 🥺🥺🥺

(double exposure spoilers under the cut)

I knew episode 5 was gonna be a nightmare sequence but i still ate that shit up what can i say it's fanservice and im the fan lol

genuinely did get a bit emotional at the end like okay im HAPPY FOR HER

post credits scene was wild?? Not sure how I feel about them just handing out super powers like halloween candy but...okay? and MAX CAULFIELD WILL RETURN HELLO ???? part of me is sceptical and part of me is like yay more max hehe (fanserive, fan, etc.) - either way, guess im gonna be insufferable for a while then whoops

'will you ever go back to arcadia bay' 'one day' 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺girl i'll cry

lowkey the journal entries were nerfed. i mean i dont really care but still.

amanda max flirting scenes gave me major flashbacks to my own lesbian situationship so 10/10 points for accuracy on that one

i really enjoyed all the characters ngl!! and safi was so good and so intriguing i love that they let her be morally dubious oooo

'our lady of the storm' iconic. shes my fucking GIRL.

okay but is safi creating the lis avengers. like what is her plan. im concerned

how many endings were there because i strongly suspect there might have just been one and if that's the case that's hilarious but also like, come on

they kinda baited me with the "two maxes" bit at that one point i was like YES time travel bullshittery and max being a bitch to her alternate self EXACTLY WHAT I ASKED FOR and then i figured out the twist like 10 seconds before it was revealed and i was like well thats cool but.....i just wanna see max bully herself is that too much to ask for.....

'text from: chloe' like okay my heart did skip a beat lbr

okay so did max actually kill safi or what because that was never clear. like i think the polaroids were from the original timeline and then max shoots safi in that timeline leading to timeline 2 which is OUR original timeline i.e. the dead timeline and then...the living one happens asw? or was it like a pre-emptive timeline split did max ever actually shoot safi? i mean someone had to right? maybe this will make sense in the morning. or on the wiki. who can say

knew there was gonna be darkroom shit in the nightmare sequence fuck yeah (lowkey wanted more but hey im just being greedy now)

another tiny criticism but the krampus party did not feel like a college party lol like the vortex club end of the world party felt intense it felt dramatic it had stakes - krampus i was like oh this is giving me dead freshers week vibes guys just animate in some more extras please i know you can do it

music was amazing ofc

man i had this whole theory going on where max died in the "living" timeline at the same point that safi died in the "dead" timeline and that was why there was no alternate version of herself and it was some safis trying to save max while max is trying to save safi thing - obviously very wrong but i still vibe with it

i just really like max okay <3

To form something of a coherent conclusion: Really solid game, with some great scenes (the end of chapter 2 and start of 3 were def the standouts to me) and (in my opinion at least) really really good development for max - she was so clearly the same max as the original game but also she's grown up and she's grown into herself and ahhh it made me so happy to see!

I found some of the twists more effective than others and I think there could have been more build up to the storm (like in the original lis you KNOW it's coming for so long and there's this feeling of dread throughout whereas it kind of felt like we rushed to get to it here), but overall i had a good time, i really enjoyed getting to know the characters, and most of all, i really enjoyed getting stupidly attached to Max Caulfield again <3

7/10 looking forward to going down the rabbit hole with this one and i guess we'll see where we go next...??

[joe-willow]

New version of my theory abt kinger with more details (actually I thought that the og version wasn't published thank you for the likes and reblogs everyone !!!!!! 💙💙💙💙

This version might be even shittier than the first one 😬

Hey. "7 years of computer science for this". Hey what if. What if ok kinger has a wife ok but what if. What if when he's under all his pillows he's actually trying to remember what happened before. Before the amazing digital circus. How to get out of it. Trying to find a way. Just think about it, like darkness makes him get back to normal, and I don't think he would have said "7 years of computer science" just like this if he only remembered his wife.

Like that's a bit sad to think about it because I know that a lot of people likes kinger including me, but I think that he will MAYBE abstract. I know he is there since much more time than the others but I don't know, i feel like it could happen.

Remind yourself before insulting me or whatever that I'm not a super mega fan of tadc like some of you so I might have missed some infos about kinger that goosework dropped here and there, and I havent checked the wiki, I'm just writing this because I WANT THIS THEORY TO LEAVE MY BRAIN ARGGHHHHH

Kinger is pretty unstable, not really in the way that he could abstract at any moment like, but he has lost his mind, and does not seem to remember anything when he's with the others, even if he is able to go in the dark sometimes in their presence. In the hell it's diferent IT'S COMPLETELY DARK, so he was able to be in his normal state with Pomni. He tries to reassure her and all, because he is at that moment aware of what is tadc, which he wasn't really the moment before ???????? OK and so my idea is that (I think) he probably is one of the ppl who created tadc (I mean that's a bit obvious) and that seeing that being in the dark makes him go normal, he stays in the dark as much as he can so he can try to remember what happened BEFORE, his wife has existed for sure but he would be KINDA using her a a cover to avoid the others to be anxious because of him when they see him in his normal state, I think that doing that kinda make him go crazy, explaining his state when he goes out of the dark. The more he tries, the darker he has to go in to remember. See, he had to be in HELL to remmeber. So it drives him crazy. He almost remember something but in the end just forget it. Kinger is going to abstract . I'm warning you guys.

He's trying to find a way out of tadc, goes in the dark to be able to remember, does not succeed, it drives him even more crazy than he was before, he gets out of the dark and goes back to his crazy-CRAZY state in which he immediately forget everything he just did. It hides to the others the fact that he's trying to find a way out, that he's actually REALLY going crazy and probably not so far from abstracting. (And so when he goes back in the dark he remmebers the others things, but mostly his wife because it's a tadc thing, the other things are harder to remmeber but he gets some sort of weird flashbacks that he has a hard time interpreting or just remmeber and mostly ignore completely because he's remembering his WIFE and cuz he's still half let's say in his crazy state but if he picks up on a memory he starts kinda remembering the other things and realizing, AND SO BEGIN THE INNER FIGHT like "wait what's that oh hold on i KNOW that but what is it oh my god i know it's important but i can't understand what it is oh my god " yk like when you remember a dream YOU KNOW it's happened but you CAN'T describe even to yourself what it is. You don't even know if it's real or not or if you're just going crazy. or something like this and because there is most of the time not enough darkness.)

PLUS !!!!!!!! If we folliw what I've said, being able to talk with pomni in his normal state probably made him realize how crazy he has become since the last time this has happened so like he's kinda "SIGHHHHHHHHH dammit". It will just accelerate his abstraction, and reduce the chances of getting out of tadc for pomni, jax raghata gangle and zooble. Double bruh. (Like I mean If you you were since a lot of time unconscious of your acts and suddenly you REALIZE and remmebr, like imagine how would you feel.

I'M SO SORRY IK THAT'S AN HORRIBLE AND SHITTY THEORY BUT IDK i I I DON'T WANT KINGER KINGER TO DIE WHAT DO YOU THINK 😭😭😭😭 BUT LIKE ????????,,??? AND THAT'S WHY HE WOUKD HAVE SAID THE THING WITH COMPUTER SCIENCE. HE REALIZED. HOW CRAZY HE HAS BECOME SINCE THE LAST TIME HE WAS ABLE TO BE LIKE THIS IN FRONT OF SOMEONE OR IN GENERAL. I'M DUMB. I'M CRAZY. IM GPING CRAZY 😭.

Idk I that make any sense, english isn't my first language but I swear if this become a reality I WILL CRY 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

The whole thing with his wife is absolutly adorable

HONESTLY ?? I think that my own theory is straight up SHIT but hey I tried

[itsevanffs]

give us some headcanons on slowly! would love to...

i feel like your sentence got cut off there, so let me know if you meant something else, i can yap about slowly for days.

are they headcanons if it's my story? things to think about

anyway, i aim to please, so here are a few that i do not consider spoilers (sorry, i really want to keep some stuff close to my chest for now, as you may have noticed). they're more trivia than headcanons but hey we ball:

tyler stone died of lung cancer in 2001 or something (slowly is set in 2018). fuck that guy he sucks. if you don't know who he is you should read miguel's original comic run, they go really hard. or you could read the wiki i guess but it's less fun

technically a headcanon--i think?--for canon, but miguel's daughter is called gabriella. i'm strangely really attached to her (fanon) name, i hope it's either never said out loud if it's something else or that it's confirmed in canon. that'd be fun

gonzalo and miles' dynamic is heavily based off me and my sister's dynamic, especially when we were both younger and dumb tweens. gonzalo also isn't really based all too closely on miles g. aka 42, he's more like... if canon miles were to split into two people and you put more of the anger into one and more of the longing into the other, you'd end up with slowly's gonzalo and miles

if this were a different story, aaron, jeff and miguel would be in a complicated love triangle tbh. too bad miguel's a creep and a weirdo (radiohead intensifies)

idr if it's been confirmed in-fic but miguel is one of the richest men in the united states, he just kinds of larps as a peasant (comfortable middle class bachelor if we're gonna be accurate. but i digress) because it feeds his whole despair schtick. the only reason he hasn't given miles actual gold-threaded clothing yet is because miles has made it quite clear so far he's uncomfortable with being sugar babied in any capacity

wish i could drop more lore about miles and miguel but mark my words it will all be incorporated into the fic one day. and into the prequel. did i mention i was writing a prequel? i'm writing a prequel btw

and a fun other headcanon i have which is strictly for canon so i'm dropping it here as a bonus:

i have decided in my infinite wisdom that miles, gwen, miguel, hobie, aaron and miles 42 are all trans. probably others too but i had an exam today and my brain is fried so i can't think of them right off the bat. what flavour of trans? idk. they're all definitely trans in some form or another though. i deserve them all in my little hoard corner so they're all trans now. infecting all the characters i love the most with the Trans. just for me

i hope that was kind of something in the direction you wanted to hear about :] have a good timezone

[e-the-village-cryptid]

Hey, I was curious if you knew anything about the Yuuzhan Vong from Star Wars legends? I'm currently writing a fanfic that includes them, but the wiki was slightly confusing about their descriptions. Also anything you know about Mgnaa-Mgnaa or whatever its name is. If you want to answer, of course.

Also, just to have something that includes the interest from your description, what about Andor sets it apart from other Star Wars properties? I've heard it being talked about as one of the best currently out, but don't quite understand the hype (I haven't watched it yet).

sorry anon I don't really know star wars besides andor lol. I watched andor having only seen the original trilogy once when I was very young, and having read a detailed (spoilery) synopsis of rogue one for context. I don't know how you found this blog in a non-andor star wars context haha because I really don't know anything more than I've absorbed by having andor friends who also know other star wars (pssst @chipthekeeper mayhaps you know the answer to anon's question here?)

as for why I love andor. well. I can and will talk about this for hours so I will hold myself to just three bullet points:

the writing has such a depth to it. sci-fi can sometimes struggle to get through exposition in an engaging way, but andor ensures that every single conversation forwarding the plot/worldbuilding also carries a lot of weight as far as characterization and implied history of the characters and their relationships to each other goes, too. a lot is left unsaid but very much present in the implications of the way characters speak to each other. I notice something new every rewatch and it's delicious. in relation to this, the acting is also brilliant for just. every. single. character

visually it's STUNNING. most of the sets and effects were practical and it SHOWS. the droid is an elaborate puppet and so his body language and everything just feels so full of life. they built 8 full city blocks of ferrix, including many detailed interiors as well as exteriors. it's just GORGEOUS it feels SO REAL. they're attentive to what the extras are doing and actually making them part of the city, not just people wandering around. you could just reach out and touch it. they filmed on location in the scottish highlands they jumped off an actual dam they just. it's beautiful.

the MUSIC. it's brilliant. again, there was a vision and there was a heart to it and it SHOWS. the composer was on board from the very very beginning and so the music is beautifully woven into the diagetic soundscape of the show (klaxon alarms, clanging of metal, actual diagetic music, and more) in a way that is just so emotionally impactful and makes my little band kid heart dance around in glee. I won't spoil the show for you but there is a moment towards the end of the season that made every single former band kid jump out of their chairs losing their entire goddamn minds

*shuts mouth with visible effort* like i said i could talk forever but. i love it. i love the characters i love the story i love the visuals i love the music i love the way it makes you think and the questions it poses and the way it rewards digging deeper into motivations and implications i love the endless things there are to discover. i hope you decide to watch it :)

[lulu2992]

Hey there!

After reading your great insight on what to keep in mind when, say, writing the Seed brothers in fanfiction, I was wondering if you wanted to cap things off on what to keep in mind when writing Faith?

You don’t have to do it immediately, just when you have the time.

Hi! Sure, let’s conclude this “series” with the last member of the family, Faith Seed :)

First, while she’s referred to as a/the Siren by Dutch, a couple of NPCs, and in promotional material, this isn’t her official title in the Project. And as you probably know, Faith Seed’s real name is actually Rachel. However, unlike what the Far Cry Wiki claims, I’m quite certain her full name was never Rachel Jessop. Unfortunately, the biography on her Wiki page is partly made up and based on that incorrect assumption, so I really don’t recommend trusting it. This advice goes for all Far Cry characters, and I don’t think the Far Cry 6 Season Pass is a good reference, either, since the DLCs were written with the help of the Wiki.

In Far Cry 5, in addition to the story cutscenes, she has three sermons (here, here, and here), four answering machine messages (here, here, here, and here), and can also be randomly encountered in the Henbane River region as a “specter” (term used in the files). When she appears, she either hums the song “Oh The Bliss” (here and here) or talks to the Deputy. I think what she says really is worth listening to and adds a lot to her character. @teamhawkeye has done a tremendous job recording and compiling all her appearances in 9 videos (1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9)! As for Marshal Burke’s “apology video”, in which Faith also appears, it’s here.

I wrote a summary of what other characters say about her here (masterpost here), and all the NPCs’ comments about the Seed family are available here and here.

Faith isn’t in Far Cry Arcade and doesn’t have the same “combat lines” as most other characters, but you can still listen to everything she says during the final fight against her here.

Her deleted lines are here, and she has even more here. Most of them probably aren’t relevant anymore, but they’re still interesting and make me wonder what they originally had in mind for the character!

If I’m not mistaken, there’s only one note in Far Cry 5 written by Faith: the “Note for Tracey” (Hope County Jail). The note “A Confession” (Throne of Mercy Church) was also written by “Faith”, but it seems to me the author is one of Rachel’s predecessors.

Indeed, in-game evidence indicates Rachel wasn’t the first woman who took on the role of Faith Seed. There were at least two others before her, Lana and Selena, but we barely know anything about them or why they were replaced. Two letters, written by people who knew and loved them, can be found in the game in the Horned Serpent Cave and the King’s Hot Springs Hotel, but that’s pretty much it.

There was another note written by Faith, apparently cut from the game but still available in oasisstrings. It was supposed to be in her bunker, Faith’s Gate:

To my guardians, Because we have each other, we are already strong. But when the Collapse comes, this gate will need to be the heart of our strength. Guard it with your lives, knowing that any sacrifice you make will be for the future of humanity's greatest ideals and dreams. Jacob and Joseph have chosen you to guard this gate. You should be very proud. I know you serve me with love, but never forget that this will be your home, too. If you falter from this purpose, remember the bliss is there for you. With love, Faith

It’s worth noting that, in the game’s files, Faith (or the Henbane River) is sometimes referred to as “Selena Seed”. To me, this suggests that her identity and her backstory went through many changes during the development of Far Cry 5, and that might explain at least some of the grey areas surrounding the character.

Since she isn’t the Seed brothers’ biological sister and they weren’t raised together, The Book of Joseph doesn’t give a lot of information about her life before Eden’s Gate aside from what the game already tells us: she was a broken person, addicted to drugs, and was “adopted” by Joseph as his sister and Herald. When she joined the cult, since drugs are forbidden by the rules, she first had to overcome her addiction, and the book says she succeeded with the help of scopolamine (basically Bliss). It’s also explained she then worked with a geneticist named Peter, probably on developing Bliss. That said, in the game, he’s never mentioned, cultists never use the word “scopolamine” (always “Bliss”), and nothing clearly indicates it can be or has ever been used as a substitution treatment, so I’m not sure what’s still canonical...

Faith also appears in the short film Inside Eden’s Gate (not entirely canon to me but still good) where she’s played by Mackenzie “Kenz” Lawrén Johnson. I must admit Faith is my favorite Herald in the film; I really like Kenz Lawrén’s interpretation as well as her opinion on the character, which she gave in this interview!

Weirdly, Faith has often been referred to as the “half-sister” by the game’s main writers (such as here or here) even though she isn’t related to the Seed family in the game. It’s possible that she used to be but that was changed at some point. According to the Lead Writer, “Maybe she isn’t liked by the other two brothers as she didn’t grow up with them” (which is hinted at by NPCs and John himself in Far Cry 5). In a now-deleted interview for GameCrate, he also described her as “more of an outsider” and “probably the most fervent believer in Joseph”.

Greg Bryk, who co-created and played the Father, said he believed he needed Faith because “the maternal aspect of the feminine energy is missing” in his life even though it’s something “essential for Joseph to have”. He thinks there have been several Faiths because “when [Joseph] would lose faith, [he] would find another Faith.” And according to him, “she doesn’t need to have a specific energy because there’s something of an essence that [he needs] as opposed to a person”, and she almost has a “mother earth energy”.

While she does give a bit of information about her past life as Rachel in the game, saying she was “ostracized by her community”, “bullied by friends”, “abused by her family”, and “wanted to die”, it’s not always easy to know what’s true and what’s not when it comes to Faith because she’s known for being a master manipulator; lying is canonically part of her modus operandi. In a way, because Faith Seed is a role, I would say she’s also always performing. Unlike what a few NPCs claim, I don’t think that means she never tells the truth, but she’s still undoubtedly “very skilled at twisting the facts and turning any situation to her advantage”, as the game’s Narrative Director put it.

Although the details are unclear, I believe it’s true Rachel was “lost” and “broken” before she arrived in Hope County and joined the Project. It’s also true that, as Faith Seed, she’s now powerful, dangerous, and not innocent anymore, as her former best friend Tracey Lader, who knows her very well and witnessed her transformation (but was unable to stop it), warns the Deputy. I neither mean nor think the situation Faith is in is normal, healthy, or the best thing that could have happened to her, but I do think saying she’s unhappy with it, helpless, in danger, or that she only wishes she could run away from the cult really is a misunderstanding of the character. Faith knows what she’s doing, and she’s very good at doing it. To me, she’s the most powerful Herald.

Since the lore is a bit inconsistent, we’re not entirely sure how the Bliss works and who created it, but we know it’s an almost magical, hallucinogenic and pacifying drug made from “bliss flowers” (heavily inspired by Datura stramonium) that Faith is immune to, can control, and uses to brainwash people. “The Bliss” is also a place, but once again, the details are unclear. It could be her bunker, or maybe just a distorted version of reality that individuals who are exposed to the drug “live” in. Wherever or whatever it is, most people never truly come back from it or fully break free from Faith’s influence, as seen with the Marshal in the game…

In the Project, Faith’s role is to lure (hence the nickname “Siren”) people into the cult and convince them to follow the Father, often with the help of Bliss. If they keep resisting or are “too full of fear and doubt”, high doses of the drug can be administered to them and turn them into Angels, who are comparable to zombies according to some characters. Bliss irreversibly damages people’s brains, and those who become Angels unfortunately can never be saved. Faith and her followers seem to think they’re beautiful creations because they’re faithful to the Project and unable to sin. It seems she has the power to control them (at least partly), and the cult doesn’t hesitate to use them as “shock troops” or “slave labor and beasts of burden”, as NPCs say. They’re indeed very docile and resistant... as well as hard to kill.

Again, there are some discrepancies regarding what happens to potential converts in the Henbane River region, but it seems people first have to walk along the Pilgrimage path and, at the end of it, take a literal leap of faith from the statue of Joseph, just like Faith explains she did (even though whether or not the statue already existed at the time is a bit uncertain). As unbelievable as it sounds, NPCs confirm it’s entirely possible to survive the leap. After walking the Path, some pilgrims become Angels, some simply join the Project, and others don’t survive, either because they don’t make it to the end or die when they jump (maybe because their faith isn’t strong enough, I’m not sure how that works).

In the Family, Faith can be described as “the favorite child” (and I think that makes John jealous), who saw Joseph as her savior when they met and wants others to experience the same feeling, by force if necessary. Just like her brothers, she basically weaponizes her trauma and makes people relive a sublimated version of her life story: she targets the most vulnerable individuals, gives them drugs to ease their torment, and sometimes takes their minds away from them. Even though Faith is fully capable of thinking for herself, isn’t mind-controlled, was a drug user before she joined the Project (not after), and left her old self Rachel “in the darkness” willingly to be reborn as Faith Seed, she still became a new person for the Father and expects the same from anyone she converts, even if that means she has to completely brainwash them.

In conclusion, we don’t really know much about Rachel and her backstory, simply that she was broken, saw Eden’s Gate as a chance to start anew, and happily took it. Since she was young, desperate, and therefore suggestible when she met Joseph, one can wonder if Faith is simply a manipulated, brainwashed victim; a poor, helpless soul devoured by a cult. But although that situation is far from ideal or normal, she and other characters confirm that she too has teeth, and she doesn’t hesitate to use them. Rachel should theoretically just have been a victim, but as Faith Seed, she’s transcended this status. She’s found purpose, power, and is committed to her beliefs. Not everyone in Hope County precisely knows who she is, but now, she does. She’s a multifaceted mystery whom people tend to underestimate, and it’s something she likes to cultivate because that’s how she gets them. She’s a Siren, but in my opinion, also a Phoenix, who was consumed completely and rose up from her own ashes to be born again. Rachel was broken, but Faith is strong. Rachel lost herself, but Faith was found. Rachel was nothing; Faith can be anything.

[secret-engima]

Shinobi Economics 2: Warring States Boogaloo

RIGHT IT’S TIME FOR NINJA ECONOMICS 2: WARRING STATES BOOGALOO.

Link to my previous 3k tumblr rant on canon era shinobi economics here , and a casual reminder that I do not study or research economics a whole bunch outside of a casual interest for fantasy worldbuilding. Most of this is just- trying to logic out some semblance of sense inside the Naruto setting.

But to summarize the stuff I think is relevant to jumping into this one, in the previous ramble I established that:

1. Peacetime is actually Really Profitable for shinobi villages of the Nidaime to Boruto eras, because that’s when the lower classes (Merchant and Worker) can afford to pay shinobi for jobs that are ultimately the most money for the least amount of risk.

2. Shinobi villages set the prices of missions, not the clients (as seen in the premise of the Wave arc, where the bridge builder lied about the risk so that he only had to pay for a C rank instead of a B or A rank mission), and that whatever prices they have set for missions, it allows even a single parent shinobi with an active child to live comfortably in a city. Not wealthy necessarily, but clearly able to feed, clothe, shelter, and spend time with their child on top of work and training.

3. In all of canon, all the movies, even in Boruto (up to the point I’ve watched so far anyway), there is not a single shinobi that suggests going back to the warring state era. Not even the missing-nin. Not even Madara, who was more than happy to plot the downfall of every shinobi village and the world at large, tried to get them to go back to warring states (admittedly he was more interested in brainwashing everyone with an overgrown weed, but hey).

In that previous rant, I also made an offhand mention that Hashirama and Madara ending the war between their clans and making peace was them essentially inventing a ninja union, and I kind of want to come back to that in this rant by talking about what the Warring State Era ninja economy was probably like, considering what little we know in canon (ie the anime flashbacks which YES COUNT AS CANON since it makes exactly as much nonsense as the rest of Kishi’s worldbuilding), 

Okay so. What do we know about the Warring State Era?

1. We know it was a very bloody time of frequent clan on clan fighting.

2. Medical chakra techniques/medicine in general were not as advanced (because Tsunade is infamous for her contributions to the world of medicine and she doesn’t exist yet) so fatalities or crippling injuries were definitely more common, and most shinobi wore samurai style armor which tells me:

2a. The armor was likely a response to how much easier it was back then for a shinobi to be crippled or killed through blood loss and infection (especially infection).

2b. It could also be a hold over from the Samurai era, since we honestly never get a straight answer from Kishi on where the heck Samurai fit into his swiss cheese timeline. There is, according to the Naruto wiki, a mention of them having split off from shinobi back when chakra use was still called ninshu but that makes … about as much sense as most of Kishi’s timeline and therefore is suspect at best and garbage at worst.

3. Child soldiers were even more of a thing than they are in the village era. For comparison, Kakashi was considered a prodigy for graduating and becoming a genin at 5, and Itachi was exposed to death at age 4, but that flashback is structured (in the anime at least) in a manner that implies that this was not the norm (thanks Fugaku) and that Itachi should not have been anywhere near the battlefield since he hadn’t even enrolled in Academy yet (canonically enrolled at age 6 and was allowed to take the graduation test a few months later). However in the Warring States Era flashback, Hashirama’s and Tobirama’s brother Kawarama died at age 7, and their father makes comments that imply Kawarama was considered at least enough of an adult to be a shinobi, which means he *probably* didn’t die on his first mission? Their other brother Itama, who we do not have an official age for but is clearly younger than Hashirama and Tobirama (who are drawn to at least appear 12 or younger) also dies young, probably around the same age as Kawarama did. We also see Izuna, during the river confrontation between Madara’s and Hashirama’s families, wielding a sword that is clearly *sized* for a child. Unlike Tobirama in that same scene who’s out here with an adult katana held on his back like a buster sword, Izuna is using a sword that looks like it was forged with a child his age in mind. Which … yeah. Not good. Hashirama and Madara also directly reference a desire for ending the deaths of children on the battlefield when they are discussing their dream of a village. So clearly children becoming shinobi at 6-7 and up was Not Uncommon.

4. Going off the continued existence of a Daimyo and his court in canon era, there were a lot of feudal lords in this era, hiring shinobi to do their dirty work. Not just Daimyo against Daimyo like we see in the village era Shinobi Wars, but likely neighboring lords hiring one shinobi clan or another to heckle, sabotage, and assassinate each other. Especially considering the Naruto world Warring States is clearly supposed to be reminiscent of the Sengoku period of Japan.

So, with those things in mind. How did shinobi economics in this era work and why was Konoha so revolutionary in more than just “hey the Senju and Uchiha aren’t killing each other!” way?

Well first thing is that the shinobi clans would have been at the whims of the various lords and the Daimyo rather than able to establish their own prices for missions, and the vast majority of the clan on clan conflicts would have either started or been fueled by the nobles of the era out of convenience. There are over 16 clans listed on the wiki as being “Konoha” clans, while we can discount a few of them (namely the Lee clan because that’s just Rock Lee, the Uzumaki who were from their own hidden village, and the Hoki family who I think immigrated in from Suna? If I’m reading the wiki right?), and those are just the clans that actually survived to the canon village era. That is a lot of competition for shinobi work in an era where most of those jobs would have come from the rich lords, the Daimyo himself, or a few very wealthy merchants would have been able to afford to both hire a shinobi clan and would have felt it worth the risk of gambling that their competitors wouldn’t also hire a shinobi clan to retaliate. The working class would not have been able to afford a shinobi’s services, and they also definitely wouldn’t want to risk going near a shinobi, because this era was when the clans would’ve had their bloodiest, most inhuman rumors and reputations as remorseless killers.

The staple/most common jobs for shinobi clans of that era would likely have been the violent ones that in the modern era get regulated to ANBU, because again, the Worker class can’t hire for D-ranks and the Merchant class probably either also couldn’t or wouldn’t want to unless desperate or trying to threaten their competition with the reputation of shinobi. These “common” jobs would have been assassinations of adults or children, kidnappings, sabotages, blackmail gathering, spying, and open battlefield conflicts (every Senju-Uchiha conflict we see in the flashback arc, not counting Itama’s death or the river confrontation, is on an open battlefield with both parties in varying levels of armor actually). And of course the other side of those common jobs would be missions from rival lords who are hiring a clan to prevent all the previously listed missions. Which is probably where a good chunk of clan animosities started, opposing contracts that got out of hand and started an all out blood feud. 

If a wealthy merchant hired a clan to guard their product/caravan, it was probably because some competitor or a lord who took offense to them for some reason had already hired another shinobi clan to sabotage said caravan and product. If a lord hired a shinobi to kill a rival or his family, that rival had either already hired shinobi bodyguards or was going to in response to this. Which, on top of fueling a lot of clan on clan grudges from being repeatedly on opposite sides of a job, means that shinobi clans couldn’t really demand a specific mission prices. A little bit of haggling over the price, yes, especially in the case of the more powerful/sought after clans, but if a shinobi clan tried to push for “too much”, the prospective client could simply leave and hire another clan. Likely a rival clan that had a blood feud with the first clan just to spite them. Any failed missions or missions that were refused because of the pay or risk involved would also definitely lead to the client spreading word against that clan to any allies, which would lead to less missions and valuable income down the line.

The clans with the most ability to haggle, at least in Land of Fire, would *probably* have been the Four Noble Clans Kishi mentions; The Uchiha, The Aburame, the Akimichi, and the Hyuuga. We never have it explained why they are noble clans or why there is only four, but basic logic says that they were clans who actually held positions in the Daimyo’s court, and having that position would have helped them set at least *some* level of wage standard for shinobi work they took on so long as they were careful not to annoy the Daimyo in the process. But even then, there was only so much they could demand before there was a risk of the client leaving and taking any future business from them and their social circle with them.

The Uchiha-Senju conflict was said to last for generations. According to Kishi it lasted since Indra-Ashura thanks to Black Zetsu specifically, but that is stupid on multiple levels that I won’t fully cover here. It’s much more likely that the descendants of Indra and Ashura clashed a few times and mostly tried to avoid each other until the Warring States Era actually started, by which point those descendants were the Senju and Uchiha (and Uzumaki but they’re canonically a neutral party in that whole deal iirc). The blood feud *probably* started when a noble lord spotted the natural avoidance/borderline animosity of the Uchiha and Senju and hired the Senju to sabotage either an Uchiha job or even to attack the Uchiha themselves if the Uchiha held a position in the Daimyo’s court at that point. And because Uchiha do not react calmly to basically anything, the response was very bloody and over the top, to which the Senju also reacted poorly and… *gestures at the blood feud*. After that, warring lords would have started to intentionally hire the Uchiha and the Senju to pit them against each other because neither clan would haggle too much over the price of a job for fear of it being thrown to their enemy instead, and with both clans so eager to get revenge on the other as the years went on, they were guaranteed to give their all on the battlefield regardless of the mission pay. Which is a technique that would have been used against most of the clans to keep them from getting too powerful or too uppity about the pay for their jobs, but especially the dangerous ones with kekkei genkai.

With the inability to really dictate the prices of their shinobi work, the civilians of shinobi clans likely would have sought to provide some other form of goods and services to help bolster the clan (the civilians not busy trying to keep the clan fed anyway). This has been explored by other fanfic writers in this fandom (shout-out to Umei_no_Mai’s series “the Compass Points North” for being really great at this), but of course depending on the size of the clan and their access to resources that don’t immediately go to either Feeding the Clan or Providing For Shinobi Work, how much money this actually brought in for each clan is entirely variable.

So there’s the Warring States Era cycle of shinobi work. Lord A hires Clan 1 to Do Thing, Lord B hires Clan 1’s most hated rival if possible to Stop Thing, both lords sit back and watch the two clans fight it out for far less than their work is actually worth. Wash, rinse, occasionally repeat with clans that are not hated rivals but are still going to fight it out viciously because if they don’t do a good enough job then they will lose any further work from that client and the client’s associates.

And then the Uchiha-Senju Alliance happened, and did not disintegrate within weeks or months as outsiders would have anticipated.

And this one thing. This one alliance. Completely destroyed the “comfortable” cycle the lords, Daimyo, and wealthy merchants had for their shinobi dealings up to that point. Because now, not only are the two most powerful clans in Land of Fire no longer available to hire against each other, but they also have two clans’ worth of civilian trade and shinobi revenue to keep them from starving the first time they said “no” to a client, and any client they do say yes to has the pick of Senju shinobi, Uchiha shinobi, or a mixed team of the clans’ respective powerhouses.

What do you think the response was the first time a client approached literally any of the other clans and tried to hire them to go up against both Hashirama and Madara, or, just as scarily, Senju Tobirama with a grumpy Uchiha or three following on his heels.

The answer was no. The answer was heck no. The answer was we would literally rather starve rather than choose that flavor of suicide. 

Because while other clans have clashed with the Senju and Uchiha before during this era thanks to it being logistically impossible for someone to hire a Senju to fight an Uchiha and visa versa every time, those clashes would still have been comparatively rare but memorable. Similar to the nobles funding these blood feuds, the other shinobi clans of Land of Fire would have grown accustomed to “your chances of dying via Tree Man or Angry Fire Cat Man are statistically low” and being able to kinda sit back and watch the Senju and Uchiha tear each other apart from a safe distance, with only minimal risk of running into far less skilled Uchiha or Senju on a job rather than the guy who gets named the “god of shinobi” and his frenemy rival. They’ve seen the damage either clan can do, and now you want them to go against both? Without the guarantee of Madara and Hashirama (and Tobirama and Izuna pre the latter’s death) being too busy trying to kill each other to bother with you and your squishy clanmates? Hahahaha no.

And now here’s where the Shinobi Villages are a Union thing really starts to kick in. Because the Senju-Uchiha alliance grinding the Warring States cycle to a halt would have been temporary if it had just been between them, if Hashirama’s and Madara’s dream had gone no further than peace between their respective clans. If it had remained just the Senju-Uchiha alliance, even with fear of Hashirama and Madara, the other clans would have eventually been prodded into fighting them, likely even being hired by enough lords who were all unhappy with this shakeup to the routine to temporarily band together in fighting the Senju and Uchiha and overwhelm them (or at least badly cripple the manpower of the Senju-Uchiha).

But Hashirama’s and Madara’s dream wasn’t just about their clans. And suddenly here’s Hashirama “my smile is photosynthesizable” Senju and Madara “consider my wrath as your alternative” Uchiha approaching the other clans and offering to let them join this alliance. To not have the risk of fighting either of these terrifying men or their clans, but rather to pool their resources together to make missions safer. To be able to turn down missions without starving thanks to the combined revenue of multiple clans and their civilian specialties (and the backing of the Uzumaki, who are generally accepted by fanon to have allied with the Senju by this point via Mito’s marriage), and to have other clans be extremely wary of taking any job against their combined might, which will make the jobs they do take a whole lot safer.

Not every clan jumps on board right away of course, canonically the first ones to join the alliance were the Sarutobi and the Shimura (fanon assumes that these two had connections to the Senju and Uchiha clans before this but I … couldn’t find mention of that in the wiki?), which means suddenly any job this alliance takes means that a rival will be up against a roulette wheel of anywhere from “maybe four Senju like normal” to “combined wrath of a Senju-Uchiha-Sarutobi-Shimura team that are working out their collective new-alliance stress on your hide”. The other clans would have chosen to jump aboard the alliance very quickly once it became clear that this wasn’t going away or splintering. Which means more and more clans are saying “no” to jobs that they feel aren’t worth the prices being offered, and less and less clans are willing to go against the alliance for fear of being stomped on. Suddenly the clans who are in the alliance can not only say no but can say “I want to be paid this much for this job” and the lords who once had the option to just take their business to another clan are stuck. They had to either pay up or not have the job done at all.

Tobirama comes in, probably somewhere very early on in the village founding with the start of what will eventually be the universal shinobi mission ranking system, and with that comes the ability for shinobi to have a set minimum wage for each level of risk. There’s an Academy for their children to learn skills from multiple clans and sources now rather than being forced to take to the field just to help pay for food/armor/resources for the clan.

In the real world, this kind of change takes … way longer on average. But in the Naruto world the options from the get-go were “be under Hashirama’s and Madara’s protection” or “be a potential enemy against them and their clans on a mission”, and none of the shinobi clans who survived to that point did so by being stupid. After they saw the Sarutobi and Shimura join without negative consequences (or subjugation as vassals), the clans of Land of Fire would have started joining the alliance faster than the nobles who used their blood feuds as a handy leash could keep up with or compensate for. Canon says something along the lines of the village negotiating with the Daimyo for permission to be there but realistically by the time the Daimyo realized this was not just a passing treaty, that the Ninja Union was not going away, it was already far too late to stop it. Trying to starve the alliance into compliance by cutting off their trades would have only meant that every shinobi clan now on board with Konoha’s existence (read; the majority of them) would overthrow the Daimyo and install a more cooperative leader in his place. Heck, for all we know that’s what happened, it’s not like Kishi bothers to keep a coherent history or timeline. But considering the Daimyo does have a say in who the Hokage of the village is and they are enough at the Daimyo’s beck and call to fight in the future Shinobi Wars, it is more likely that the budding Konoha did successfully negotiate with the Daimyo for a “our loyalty and your nominal supervision over our village in exchange for extra land and free reign over our internal structure” kind of deal.

The clans being united was also an advantage for the Daimyo, once he got over the “can no longer charge whatever he wants for assassinations”. Because with all the Land of Fire clans unified, suddenly any upstart lords looking to depose him or wars he might get up to with other Daimyo look a lot more winnable. The other major Elemental nations, seeing this and realizing it’s not going away, probably scrambled to get their own clans to unify, which is one reason why Kiri is … such a disaster in canon. Rather than being a willing endeavor by the various clans to unite for their own benefit, the Daimyo of Water basically threw all his feral clans off their respective islands and territories and said “you all live here now and you all do what I tell you or else the Land of Fire will wipe us out”. Which, as you can see, went swimmingly for them (sarcasm). That or the other shinobi clans in the various nations did actually unionize of their own will once they saw it worked for Konoha, but Kiri never got the memo of “actually make peace with your rivals” and instead just clustered together in a feral knot of “we hate each other but we hate outsiders MORE so we’re going to pretend we actually function as a society”. Which lasted… Not long.

And there you go, another shinobi economics ramble. I feel like this one is even less structured than the last one but hey at least it’s like. 100 whole words shorter.