#‘what if red robin never happened’ and what if we centered that plot in red robin on the person it happened to instead of acting like it

[lonniemachin]

this disability pride month im escaping into my post-red robin mind palace where the new 52 never happened and lonnie had a recovery period from his gunshot wound + chemical paralysis + is disabled and the ulysses plot is focused back on how it affected him and his further development as a person and his identity/relationship to heroism et cetera.

[bluegalaxygirl]

I'm ready to Fight God or become him (Zosan X reader) P1

Plot: Zoro, Sanji and Luffy all fight Cthulhu while Reader and the crew try and stop the cult who summoned him.

The creature is based off Lovecraft stories and thank you to @being-worthy for the suggestion <3. Zoro X Sanji X Reader, poly relationship, established relationship, Reader is GN.

Warning: Cult, Violence, Blood, Bad language and Luffy being Luffy.

Part 2

It was just a coincidence that you all ended up here. The sunny docked on an island for supply's, you were all only supposed to be there for a few hours but things never go to plan where your a member of the straw hat crew. One member starts trouble and the others step in to help. This time it was Zoro, he got lost again and ended up walking into a building he shouldn't have, people in robes performing a ritual near the sea. Thinking he was there to stop him they attacked and of course Zoro fought back taking them out and distorting the building in the process catching everyone attention. The whole village started going after your crew you all meeting up with Zoro to find out what on earth is going on. The hole village is a cult trying to summon the god like being known as Cthulhu and Zoro just happened to walk in on that ritual. Now you were all trying to fight your way back to the sunny only for one of the cult leaders to summon the creature, Its large body coming out of the water caught everyone attention, the fighting stopped as everyone watching this thing stand up tall and step onto the island. It stood hundreds of meters tall, a large human body with wings, long claws and webbing on feet and hands. Its head like an octopus, tentacles where its mouth should be, its skin was wet and slimy and its large glowing red eyes looked down at you all.

Luffy's smile widened at the creature and you felt your heart drop, you know what your captain is like, he wants one of two things, for it to join his crew or to fight it. Either one didn't please you but when the captain decides something there's no stopping him. "Luffy, what do we do?" Nami asks stepping back away form the creature. Luffy laughs not taking his eyes off the creature "You guys deal with these guys, i'm going to talk to it" The crew tries to stop him, but he runs off anyway "We'll look after him. Try and stop the leader" Sanji yells running with Zoro after their crazy Captain. The cult turns to the rest of you and starts trying to attack you again. "How?" Usopp yells out not knowing where to start as he fires a shot at a group. "We should split up in groups" Franky yells punching a member away form him. "Right" you all yell running off in different directions. Chopper and Brook headed North, Nami and Usopp headed west while you and Robin headed east which just so happens to be the direction of Cthulhu. Franky stayed behind to protect the ship keeping the cult form trying to sink it.

Running through the cracked streets you and Robin fought off the cult heading soon seeing something that looked like a church, running in you close the door behind you keeping it closed as the Cult banged and pushes on the door. Robin moves some church pews in front of the door making it too heavy for the cult to break through. Luckily there doesn't seem to be another way in so for now your safe to look around. "I'll check the back" Robin nods walking down the center and into some back rooms. Looking around you see stain glass windows all depicting the sea in different weather conditions, long rows of pews and a stand on a stage with a door behind it that Robin went into. Looking up you notice there's a walk way, its think but there seems to be a few doors dotted around, looking around you pull a large curtain back revealing a ladder leading up into the walk way. Climbing up the banging on the door gets louder but it doesn't seem to brake or be moving too much so you keep climbing making it onto the walk way. All the doors look the same so you just look through them one by one, The first was a store room, full of chairs, tables and boxes, the second room was empty and the third wouldn't open, with a smile you lean back and kick the hand braking the door and making it open.

Luffy skidded to a stop near the beach looking up at the massive creature not taking any notice of the cult leader under it yelling up a strange language at it. Zoro and Sanji stopped next to their Captain getting ready to fight. Luffy laughs loud catching Cthulhu's attention looking down at the boy with its red eyes as the captain starts walking closer "So your Cthulhu hu?" he laughs holding his hat to his head as he looks up so it doesn't fall off "I want you to join my crew" he yells the god like creature starts to laugh, it sounds like a male booming laugh but with a inhuman grumble almost like a dragons roar. Luffy kept smiling though the cult leader turning around and yelling at the boy "You should be bowing child, he is a god a manifestation of kayos and destruction that will bring an end to this world" He laughs a crazed look on his face. Luffy laughs louder the cult leader staring in shock at the captain, Cthulhu stops laughing tilting his head to the side as the boy wipes his nose "I'M MONKEY D LUFFY, I'M GOING TO BECOME THE KING OF THE PIRATES AND I WANT YOU... TO JOIN MY CREW" Luffy yells out shocking everyone who can hear him. Cthulhu growls loud almost defining as it swings a webbed clawed hand at Luffy hitting him and sending him flying through a building and into another. "LUFFY" Zoro and Sanji yell before turning their attention to the angry creature.

It slams a hand down at them, but they manage to dodge both running up its arm, Zoro getting all his swords out while Sanji kicked up spinning to light his leg on fire and kicking down at the other creatures hand that tried to squish Zoro "Diable Jambe, Concassé" he yells the monster's hand being kicked away slamming into the ground the Cult leader jumping out the way just in time. Zoro Jumps off the arm up to the creatures face raising his swords as a blue aura surrounds his body and swords before spinning in the air and bringing them down on the god like entity "Three-sword style, 108 pound Phoenix" The creature sequels taking a step back before, another arm grows out of its side slamming the swords man down and into the ground. "GUM GUM... Jet Bazooka" Luffy yells jumping in, his skin burning hot as he uses gear two, keeping his hands close to his sides before punching them out hitting Cthulhu in the stomach. It squeals again the force sending it back a few steps becoming unbalanced.

Zoro sits up using his swords to help him stand as Sanji drops down next to him "You ok?" The cook asks smiling down at the swordsman who simply nods "Yea, that thing doesn't hit too hard" Standing up and cracking his neck Zoro watches Luffy land on the ground in front of him a big smile on his Captains face. "Well if he doesn't want to join, then.... lets fight" Luffy laughs, Zoro and Sanji moving to stand beside him. The cult leader pants moving towards them "You... your just a child, you stand no chance against a god" He yells only for Sanji to kick the man in the face sending him flying into the streets rolling until he hits a pole. "Nice one" Zoro laughs as Sanji pulls out a cigarette and lights it "He was getting on my nerves" Taking a puff Sanji fixes his jacket watching the creature get its balance back "Lets take this thing out" Luffy runs in followed by his two crew members ready to take down this god like being.

Walking through the door the dark room is only lite by candles on the floor. A statue in the back of the room depicts a cloaked man with no face, his hands holding out an open book. Next to it are two octopus tentacles on each side almost reaching the ceiling. In the middle of the room is a large stone circle with a bowl and several books in the middle looking down at the bowl there's some weird green liquid shimmering under the candle light. It smells very metallic but you've never seen a metal like this. "Robin, i think i found something" you call out from where your standing "Bring it down" The woman's voice calls back, grabbing all the books and the bowl you head out of the room, the banging on the door gone as you look over the edge calling out for the black haired woman who walks out of the room. Holding out the bowl she uses her devil fruit powers to take it off you and bring it down to her so you can get down the ladder. Holding the books to your chest you manage to get down and walk over to Robin as she looked over the bowl stopping in front of her and telling her about the room. "There's art in the office of the same man in a cloak" she comments putting the bowl on a nearby pew and taking the books of you to flip through.

"So what do you think the green stuff is?" you ask looking at the bowl again. "Well there aren't many metals that smell and the ones that do need something else in order to smell like this. Im guessing Copper or brass mixed with probably blood" she explains making you look confused at her "Blood isn't green" you comment only for the woman to smile and put a book in your hands, the page open to show depictions of sea kings "Its very rare but there are a hand full of sea kings out their that are rumored to be descendants of gods, and they bleed green" Looking over the pages you see what she's talking about, it takes you a minute for your brain to process but it soon hits you. "Cthulhu is a god like entity so... you need a descendant of gods to summon him right?" you ask earning a nod and smile from the black haired woman "Im thinking the same, i also think the book that cloaked man is using in every depiction is the answer but i haven't found anything like it" thinking for a moment you both get an idea only to be interrupted by a chair flying through the church window and cult members starting to climb in. "You'll pay for making us break these sacred windows" One man yells before you kick him in the face sending him out the window, while Robin grabs the bowl. The two of you jump out and run through town as the cult chases after you.

Making your way through the town you both fight your way to the distorted church, there isn't much left thanks to Zoro but it is where the ritual started. Robin uses her powers to protect you and hold the bowl behind her as you push through the rubble looking for the book. Pushing bricks, wood and body's out of the way you soon find it holding it close to your chest "Robin, lets go" you yell before punching a woman in the face who runs at you getting past Robin's arms. Robin runs up to you taking the book of you and giving you the bowl before running off to where Cthulhu is. Robin reading as you run through the streets, Your job now was to protect her and the bowl, it wasn't easy but you did it soon making it to the edge of town the cult stopping not wanting to get too close to the ongoing fight. Looking up you smile seeing Zoro, Sanji and Luffy fighting the creature, burning it, cutting limbs off as it regrows them and punching it hard enough to make it step back. Your boys and your Captain are amazing watching them take on a god like being while smiling and laughing. Managing to pry your eyes away from the fight you notice a cult member on the ground as you made your way over you see his cloak, it looks just like the statue.

Robin walks over to you looking down at the man "This book mentions a portal made of the sea kings blood, we have to get Cthulhu back into it and close it, but we need this guy to do it" she sighs looking down at the man "I sure we can make that happen" you smile grabbing the man with your free hand and dragging him along the floor "The portal must be at the beach, you head there and get things set up while i find Brook. He can help make this one do what we need" Robin nods putting the book under your arm giving you instructions before running off to find your skeleton crew mate. Dragging the man you walk down the street avoiding any rubble that comes your way thanks to the fight still being close by, the inhuman noises Cthulhu makes sends shivers down your spine and makes your body want to freeze but you don't let it, you have a job to do. The beach isn't too long and in the sand there's the same green liquid in a circle with strange symbols drawn into the sand, letting the man drop to the floor and putting the bowl down you flip through the book finding the page you need.

As the fight continues Luffy gets more and more excited, even though their all cut up, bruised and battered they never stop going at Cthulhu, every arm that gets cut off or broken regrows and the more hits it takes the more angry it becomes, growing more limbs out of its torso. With six arms the battle become harder for the three, but they weren't deterred. Jumping up high into the air managing to get above the creature Sanji forces himself down kicking the god like creature in the face before kicking off "Mouton Shot". Its then he sees you standing on the beach a book in hand, his eyes widen getting distracted as a hand slaps him to the ground "Sanji" Luffy yells getting Zoro's attention just managing to avoid another hit. "Y/N's up to something" Sanji yells looking up a Zoro running up one of the arms and nodding back at them seeming to say he'll check it out. Pushing off the creature as its hand comes down to slap him, a blue spiky aura forms on his swords crossing them over his chest he kicks off the hand slicing through the creatures chest and getting behind it "Purgatory Onigiri" the creature screams, ear-piercing as a cut forms across its chest leaking a little big of green blood.

With you stepping back Zoro lands almost in front of you, taking his sword out of his mouth as he stands up "What are you doing here?" his voice full of worry and anger "Me and Robin found a way to get rid of it... Robin went off to find Brook, so we can close the portal we need that thing in the water when where ready" With a sigh the swords man looks up at the creature, Luffy and Sanji keeping it distracted "Why don't we just kill it?" he asks turning back to you only for you to shake your head "It can't be killed, your doing a great job at fighting it but, I'll never get winded and no matter how much it bleeds it wont die. Cut its head off and I'll just grow a new one... it's a God like being the only way to stop it is trap it" Zoro groans at your words but gives in nodding to you "Fine. I'll tell Luffy and Sanji, stay out of harms way" before he leaves you rub your hand over his cheek getting some dirt off his face before leaning in to kiss him. He leans in too gripping his swords as you move closer "I know you guys can handle it. I'll call for you when where ready." you smile pushing him back with a smile watching him put his sword in his mouth and head off "Wrong way babes" you call watching him curse before he heads in the right direction.

Jumping back into the air Zoro uses Haki on his swords hardening them and creating a dark purple aura around them. Spinning his swords he fly's through the creature creating a hole in his shoulder as he pushes through "Three-sword style secret art... The billion-fold world trichiliocoms". It squeals gripping its shoulder and stepping back as Zoro lands on the ground Luffy and Sanji joining him "They ok?" Sanji asks keeping his eye on the creature "When their ready we need to push this thing back to the water. They'll be able to seal it away" Luffy groans at Zoro's words, but he trusts his crew so decides to go along with the plan. "I am not taking that thing towards Y/N" Sanji yells only for the swordsman to give a look, the look tells him everything, that they have to do this and that you'll be fine. Sighing the cook takes a long drag of his cigarette "Fine" The creatures hand slams down on them the three managing to get away as it continues to swipe at them or stomp on them.

[findingjoynweirdstuff]

Dream SMP Recap (July 6/2021) - Prime Path Renovations

Ponk experiences a setback. He and Foolish discuss Plan 69 together. It’s only a matter of time.

Tommy decides to clear some of the crowded area along the Prime Path by working with Foolish, Antfrost, Ponk, Sam and Bad to tear some unused buildings (and Pride decorations) down. 

After Puffy discovers that her L’Targay was one of the builds destroyed, she decides to retaliate.

---

VOD LINKS:

Ponk

Foolish

Tommyinnit

Captain Puffy

Michaelmcchill

---

- Ponk tests out his TNT launcher and attempts to fly

- After one of the test runs goes wrong, Ponk dies in an explosion and loses all his items, including the trident. Sammy Wammy is lost forever

- It may be time to activate Plan 69. As Ponk says, it’s all about leverage...

- Ponk retrieves some items, puts on the creeper head and grabs Warden’s Will, Sam’s sword, from his underground base 

- Later, Foolish comes online and Ponk meets him at the bank, doing his best Sam impression in the creeper head. She informs him that the plan is coming together, but there is a setback (Ponk claims she was testing the security system on the bank with Sam’s voice)

- The time is soon for Ponk’s arm plan. They show Foolish a chest. Foolish opens it and looks at the contents -- the leverage -- with his screen hidden. He’s shocked

Ponk: “Foolish! It was never in vain! I am twenty steps ahead, Foolish! I am a master of chess! I am the master!”

Foolish: “Do you realize that thing -- that is nuts! Does anyone else know about that?”

Ponk: “No! No one knows, Foolish! No one knows!” (laughs)

Foolish: “And that was like -- I guess I may have to ask you later to explain where you got it, but...”

- Foolish gives Ponk some resources

Ponk: “Our time will come. We will meet again. Very soon, hopefully.”

Foolish: “But you realize -- like, what you have, though -- there’s more than just the thing that we could do, like there’s a lot more--”

Ponk: “Foolish! I am a self-centered person, Foolish. It is only for my gain! And maybe yours!”

Foolish: “Yes, but we could also do it for other gains!”

Ponk: “No! No, Foolish. No, Foolish...Some people are meant to be, in the places they are meant to be. Okay? Alright. I will see you -- I’ll see you later, Foolish.”

- They part ways

- Tommy establishes Spud Lore

- He meets Foolish on the Prime Path and asks about BadBoyHalo’s promo codes. Tommy takes down the charity sign

- He gets Foolish to take off his armor as they continue. He has figured out that no one likes rich people

- They make it back to Tommy’s house. Tommy takes his riches out of his Ender Chest and puts them in a chest

- To clear out some room, they start taking down the gingerbread house and Antfrost logs on, telling them to get away. Ant meets them at the house and they talk

- Tommy informs Antfrost that it is no longer Christmas. Ant is willing to help them take down other things, and Tommy claims partial ownership of the gingerbread house

- Next, Tommy sneaks into the Targay. They decide it’s suitable to bulldoze

- Mario interrupts. Tommy informs him that Targay has been “opening soon” for half a year. Yoshi arrives as well, but they quickly start taking it down

- Technoblade logs on just to suggest they tear down the prison

- Tommy asks Ant about his love life and how it’s going

- Tubbo joins the call and informs him of the copious amounts of TNT in his possession

- Tommy cleans up the Definitely Not Blood while Tubbo pokes Ranboo

- He also wants to make a trapped Freebies Chest

- Sam logs on while Tommy burns down the rainbow wall. Since Antfrost is there, it’s allowed

- The biggest challenge is the flag above the Community House, which is immensely prideful and an unfortunate image to destroy. Tommy takes down the Pride Flag. Antfrost simply watches

- They put the blocks in the Freebies Chest

- Next, they go to inspect the prison. Tommy hates the prison. Antfrost states that it would be a conflict of interest for him, since he works there

- Sam appears at the prison entrance and tells them to stop. Foolish tries to bargain with scaffolding

- Foolish puts on Sam’s head and they face off with Warden Sam. Tommy puts on his own creeper head and proclaims that they should get rid of this prison, as the prison system is flawed! 

- Foolish brought pot. Antfrost brought weednip

- Tommy and Foolish go through the prison entrance portal and it gets deactivated by an explosion

- Tommy has a flint and steel and Sam begs them to try and re-light it. Tommy has leverage. Sam says he has something on him that Tommy would like. Tommy takes the deal and they go back through the portal

- Sam gives Tommy stacks of TNT and the group heads off again to the obsidian Nether Portal cube

- They start deactivating it and Ponk logs on

- Tommy takes down Dream’s honeymoon resort (the iron door structure)

- Sam suggests they take down Ninja’s house, but Tommy protests. This is iconic. He tries to call Ninja

- Foolish starts taking it down to test how it feels. They explode the rest and Tommy keeps the bed for good luck

Tommy: “i’m not gonna Gaslight Gatekeep Girlboss Ninja Fortnite Blevins, Sam! It just wouldn’t work! I’m no girlboss. I’m merely a manloser.”

- Tommy goes to mine dirt in sorrow. Ponk speaks to them, arriving in his Robin outfit. They explore the invisible staircase

- Next, they go to take down Ponk’s pumpkin trap

- Foolish wonders what would happen if they tried to kill the dragon. He says if you kill the dragon, you get “XD” in your name and get Creative mode. Tommy doesn’t want to risk it

- Foolish kisses himself on his elbow. Self-love

- Antfrost’s eyes turn red from the weednip and he hands some to everyone. Foolish gets high and turns into Batman

- Tommy towers up and gets rid of the last of the Y:7 sign. They start talking about Tinder

- Tommy gets Phil to join VC, asking him to tell them about Big Russ

- He calls Bad to ask about the YouTooz codes. Bad says to ask Sam. Sam does not know

- They go to the Hall of Fame and debate killing Drista’s dog. Drista’s dog dies

- Everyone goes to the graveyard by Punz’s backyard and stand on the grave. Foolish says it would be very spiritual for Tommy to blow up his own grave

- Tommy suggests they bring back the Socializing Club. Ponk says it’s the essential oils shop

- Sam runs over to blow up Wilbur’s ball (owned by Tommy) but Tommy refuses, saying he would kill Sam if he did

- Tommy leaves the group to go get some more dirt

- Ponk tells Sam that he lost the trident today as well as all his things

- They chat some more and Sam tells Foolish that Bad is "on grinder.” Foolish asks him if he’s verified on it. Sam asks if he’s spoken with Skeppy about it

- Tommy joins the VC again with a “’sup, bitches.” Sam tells Tommy that Bad is “on grinder for the experience”

- Tommy says he wants more people to be on the server more often and Foolish and Sam start comparing their server statistics. Tommy has 13 days on the server. Sam has 95 days

- Tommy concludes that he must be Foolish’s father figure and calls Foolish “son”

- Once Tommy leaves, the three go to destroy the ball but Phil joins VC to tell them that if they did that, Wilbur would cry, so they don’t 

- Bad tells Ant they should go to Foolish’s summer home to destroy the things that aren’t being used there. They discuss what to destroy and destroy a red tulip

- Then they destroy Ponk’s essential oils shop 

- Bad and Ant argue over who gets claim to Alyssa’s house. They go around various areas debating what to destroy

- They go to L’manburg and take down Fundy’s election whitehouse

- Afterwards, they go down into L’manhole and clear the Blood Vines off of the flag

- Foolish and Antfrost go back to Las Nevadas

- Puffy has heard that some damage has been done. She’s been told that there were several people there, including a certain muffinhead, a furry, and most importantly, a child (and also Foolish and Sam)

- Puffy turns on the slow Able Sisters Theme and logs on, immediately seeing the cleared-out L’Targay plot

Puffy: “What in the corporation is this shit?!”

- She walks down the Prime Path, surveying the damage, until she sees that they got rid of the flag as well

- There is now room for retribution. This seems to have been targeted at her

- Puffy goes to Tommy’s house. She could either destroy Tommy’s base, or cover it in rainbows...or...

- She spies the Big Innit Hotel in the background. They could take it a step further...

- She pulls up the stream footage for receipts. She sees Tommy start to destroy the gingerbread house and learns that Antfrost stopped it. Puffy is enraged

- She wonders what Tommy’s favorite tower is and makes her way to the Disruption Tower

- Puffy gets disrupted by the Disruption Tower and then takes part of it down. She gets Disrupted for a few minutes mining before finding out that it was the wrong tower, and it was the Power Tower that was Tommy’s favorite

Puffy: “Blackstone? I thought Tommy hated blackstone.”

- After walking past it several times, Puffy finally identifies the right tower as the Power Tower

- She gets some TNT and explodes Tommy’s house. While storing the dropped items in chests, she notices that Tommy has Schlatt’s bones

- She still remembers when she was living out of a turkey and the turkey was destroyed. While others helped, Tommy was the one who incited it. The others will get repercussions as well though

- Puffy builds Tommy’s house into a mini L’Targay so that when Tommy uses his house, he will finally be using L’Targay as well

- Next, Puffy takes down Antfrost’s gingerbread house and comes across the bathwater chamber 

- She goes to Foolish’s summer home to put mustaches on all the statues, but is disappointed to find that they already have mustaches. She starts putting a brown hat on the sphinx when Quackity joins VC

- Quackity asks why Puffy is putting hats on all of Foolish’s builds, and Quackity tells her to leave him alone. Puffy informs him that Foolish is her son. They go back and forth about Puffy’s full name (Puff Big Daddy)

- Quackity is not BadBoyHalo’s mistress

- Puffy tells him about Tommy blowing up all the rainbows, so she blew up Tommy’s house. They chat a bit

- Foolish logs on, Puffy asks him why he helped in the destruction of Targay and Foolish says it was character development

- Then Quackity tells Puffy about how Tommy got exiled. Namely, that Tubbo betrayed him (he does an impression of Tubbo). Foolish sneaks around behind them

Puffy: “Do you think it would be wrong to kill my son on the server?”

Puffy: “Like do I pull a Philza?”

- Quackity says not to even think about touching Foolish. Puffy invites Foolish to the call and Quackity tells Foolish that he is Quackity’s beloved and then starts talking about metabolism articles

- They continue chatting. Puffy shows Foolish the top hats and Foolish says they actually used to have hats not too long ago

- Foolish shows off his Batman skin and Quackity becomes the Joker. They roleplay until the Joker suggests they have a threesome and abruptly cease the bit

- Foolish and Puffy head over to Las Nevadas. Foolish shows Quackity the progress he’s made on the sand and the hotel. They keep doing the Batman impressions, now with an added Bane impression

Quackity: Imagine Bane and the Joker kissing

Foolish: Can we do that?

- They talk quite a bit about Wattpad

- Foolish changes into his Superman skin

- Quackity leaves and Foolish and Puffy continue to talk in Las Nevadas

---

Upcoming events remain the same.

[cold-heart-warm-writings]

“Watch this!”

Note: Right at 1.7k. Part 2 of 3. Hanma x reader midway till the end. More fluff and fun times at the daycare center. Honestly, not much plot. Just mild what *I* consider flirting, so if it’s not... my bad. The kids looove showing off their tricks. Want to see one?

---

“Ma!... Ma!... Ma!” 

“Whaaaat is it, Luka?” Hanma asked, exasperated, looking up from his lesson plan to a boy standing on the first step of the playground equipment. Luka stared blankly at Hanma, blinking an excessive amount. Hanma sighed. “Yes, Luka. What do you need?”

“Watch this!” Luka called excitedly. He took the singular step down from the equipment and flailed his arms like a noodle, then looked back at Hanma expectantly. 

“Wow.” Hanma deadpanned. “Is that one of your new tricks?”

“Uh huh, uh huh!” Luka nodded his head vigorously, going back up a few steps for another “trick”. 

Noticing that Hanma would actually watch the tricks, the natural response was for five more children to call out his name repeatedly, demanding that he watch trick after trick, of various actual trick-ness. Normally, Hanma could play along better and at least manage a smile at the silliness of the kids. He also did feel a bit of pride at being the only teacher the students called for to show off a picture or demonstrate a trick, but he was having an off day. He’d gone riding bikes the night before with Kisaki, and may or may not have done a few “tricks” of his own. Hanma could feel the exhaustion desperately trying to pull his eyes shut. 

“Ma!... Ma!... MA! MA! MA! MA!” Luka shouted repeatedly. 

“Luka!” Hanma finally snapped, “I need to get this done, can you please wait?”

“Look!” Luka pointed, ignoring the edge in Hanma’s voice. “The Owl class is here!” Sure enough, a group of 12 heartbreakingly tiny 3 year olds made their way out of the back door of the school towards the playground. The teacher that would be watching over playtime while the other teacher worked on class activities was… y/n. Instinctively, Hanma sat up a little straighter. 

“Hey.” Y/n called, walking towards Hanma. “Mind if I sit down next to you? I need a bit of a break before running around.” She smiled, a slight tiredness in her eyes.

“A-absolutely.” Hanma stuttered, quickly shoving his lesson plans to one side of the small table, mentally cursing at the way his voice failed him at the impossibly simple word of “absolutely”. “Are you okay if we stay outside for a bit longer?” 

“Of course!” Y/n nodded her head, taking her seat.

“Okay… hold on…” Hanma muttered, more to himself than anything. “Hey, Robins! Gather round real quick.” He called, standing up. Once his class had all gathered around, he looked at them sternly. “Which class just joined us outside?”

“The Owls.” The students said in what could not be considered unison in the most generous of circumstances. 

“And how old are the Owls? Some of you just joined our class from that one. So how old are they?” Hanma asked.

“3!” The students answered.

“You’re right. They’re 3. So that means you need to look after them, alright? Be careful when you’re running around, make sure to take turns and share the toys, and treat them kindly, got it?” The kids made vague sounds. “Got it?” Hanma called sternly again. 

“Got it.” Came the reluctant reply. The kids trudged off, and Hanma headed back towards y/n, shaking his head. The sweetest of smiles lit up her face. 

“Aw… thanks, Ma.” She said, “I’ve never seen you so stern.”

Hanma rolled his eyes, hoping that the blush creeping across his cheeks didn’t look as red as it felt hot. “Yeah well… they haven’t been listening very well today, and the last thing we need is for them to bulldoze one of your kids down.”

Y/n was quiet for a moment. Then, she leaned towards Hanma, holding up her hand so that the side of her face that was towards the kids was hidden. “Between you and me… some of them might deserve it today.” She winked at him and drew back. Hanma bit the inside of his cheek to keep from grinning too widely. 

“Yeah? What happened, y/n? I love hearing all the latest gossip.” He said with a wiggle in his brows. As soon as he did that, he regretted it. Wiggling my eyebrows? Really? Jesus, Ma, that was fucking stupid.

Y/n burst into a short and loud laugh. Never mind… worth it. 

“What’s so funny, y/n?” Luka called. 

“Nothing, Luka, go play.” Hanma and y/n said at the same time, waving him off with an identical flick of their wrists. The two looked at each other with matching amusement on their faces. 

“Uh, yeah so anyways… what’s the latest gossip on your 3 year olds?” Hanma asked, mock reporter style, leaning ever so slightly closer to y/n.

“Well!” Y/n exclaimed, adjusting her entire body to face Hanma, and leaned in over the table. Hanma tried, and quite possibly failed, at keeping his face steady and fixed on her face. Y/n looked at the students, and then back over at Hanma. “You know Hanna? The girl over there with the pigtails?” Y/n nodded her head ever so slightly in the direction of a girl who was full on picking her nose. 

Hanma nodded. 

“Yeah, during cutting practice with scissors, she decided to cut her own hair while I was telling Henry…” She nodded her head at a boy who was talking to a wall, “to stop cutting his shirt and to inspect the damage that he’d already caused.” Y/n shook her head. “Her hair is supposed to reach her waist. It barely reaches her shoulders now. Her mom is gonna freak. Rightfully so, but…” Y/n buried her head in her hands. “I’m sooo in trouble for that one. Yesterday, she couldn’t even hold the scissors!” Y/n said exasperatedly. “How the hell did she manage to cut off that much in such a short period of time? Thank God the hole in Henry’s shirt is small. I’m still debating on just not saying anything and praying his mom doesn’t notice.” Y/n rolled her eyes, her smile slipping.

“I accidentally sort of punched a kid in the face today.” Hanma said slowly, his voice low. Y/n’s head whipped up, her mouth dropping open, and eyes widening. “I was talking about something with another student, and flung my hand out, and it hit a kid, boom” Hanma slapped his right hand over his left palm “right in the middle of his face. His nose got all red, and at first I was worried there might be blood, but there wasn’t. The boss saw it too. I haven’t gotten a look that stern in a looong time.” Hanma was relieved to see that y/n was contorting her face cutely in a trying not to laugh sort of way. “So believe me… it happens to the best of us. Gotta keep fighting the fight, ya know?”

“I guess…” Y/n trailed off, not entirely convinced.

“Ma! Ma! Watch this! Hey, Ma! Watch this!” A girl called.

“Alright, show me!” Hanma called with more enthusiasm in his voice than had been there previously. 

The girl jumped and twirled around.

“Wow.” Hanma and y/n both responded. Hanma eyed y/n suspiciously, only to find her doing the same thing. 

“Hey, we’ve gotta stop this. And technically, I started three days before you did, so I was here first. So… change your speaking habits.” She playfully commanded. She was joking. Hanma knew she was joking. But if she wanted him to change his speaking habits, then girl, get out some quarters, cause he was going for a change. 

“Ma! Ma! Watch this!” A boy called.

“I’m watching.”

The kid hopped on one foot one time then stood still.

“Oh my God!” Hanma yelled, jumping up, causing y/n to jump as well. “Incredible, amazing, outstanding!” He yelled, face up towards the sky. Y/n gave him an “are you shitting me” type of facial expression, while all the kids on the playground cackled with laughter. Soon enough the chorus of “Hey, Ma! Watch this!” sounded from every corner of the playground.

Superhero tricks, somersault tricks, spinning tricks, freeze ray gun tricks, and more were shown off again and again and again. After 10 minutes, Hanma was feeling overwhelmed by all of the trick-ness, and tried to settle the kids down.

“Go play, kids, go practice more tricks to show off tomorrow.” He said shooing them away. 

“Ma! Ma! Ma!” A new voice called. Hanma turned to see y/n standing a few feet from the table, standing up from tying a girl’s shoe. “Ma! Watch this!”

“I’m watching.” 

Y/n spun around twice, flailing her arms about, almost knocking a kid down. She gasped and overcorrected at her almost mistake, and Hanma laughed hard.

“Heeey… I thought you weren’t watching anymore tricks.” Luka said from next to Hanma suspiciously, looking between him and y/n.

“LUKA, GO PLAY!” Hanma said, gently pushing Luka back towards the other kids.

“Ma! Ma! Ma!” 

Hanma turned back to y/n. “Yes, y/n?” She stood frozen for a second, and then jumped to strike a pose. “I’m Batman!” She said in a fake gravelly voice. 

“Y/n, Batman’s not cool anymore. You’re really old. We like Spiderman now.” Henry said, popping up out of nowhere. Even though he knew this wasn’t too serious, the look of absolute devastation on y/n’s face made Hanma’s stomach drop. 

“Henryyy…” Hanma drawled out. “You be nice to Y/N!” Hanma yelled, raising his hands in a pretend monster way, and started to chase Henry around the playground. Hanma was satisfied to see y/n’s devastated face turn back into a small smile, and she too began chasing the kids. 

The chasing continued on for the next 20 minutes. Hanma and y/n finally collapsed back into their chairs, exhausted from the wild game of tag, capture, and even more “watch this”s. 

“Hey…. hey, Ma.” Y/n said a bit breathlessly. “Watch this!” Hanma raised his face to look over at her. She grinned, and held up her hands, her pointer fingers and thumbs crossing each other. “Look.” Y/n giggled. “I can make a heart.”

“Wow… so impressive.” Hanma deadpanned to y/n’s amusement. No need to make more hearts when you already have mine. 

No matter how silly and ridiculous each “watch this” was… Hanma sighed knowing that he would always “watch this” for as long as y/n called for him.

[bigskydreaming]

I agree with everything you said in the last post but especially the Damian part.

Like I don’t know why people treat it like Dick had to choose between two toys and he chose the shinier model. He was in a situation where a 9/10 year old child was going to go back to a murder cult if he didn’t find a quick way to sure he stayed. And no option was good if Damian left. It was either Ra is going to steal his body or would become a powerful supervillain who would resent the whole family and between that is a whole lot of child abuse. It not like Dick had all the time in the world to figure out a different way for Damian to stay he had maybe like a day. 

Also we never actually got to see Dick’s view on the situation only Tim’s because the only time we got to see that conversation was in Red Robin ( which might be wrong but I’m pretty sure I’m right). Tim was having a slight mental breakdown so maybe not the best narrator. 

Like, the ONE thing I'd love for people to keep more centered in the varying discourses about Dick, Tim, Robin and Red Robin, is that like.....

The writer himself had Tim and Dick reconcile and work together in the aftermath of Tim leaving because he was upset.

It really doesn't get mentioned enough IMO that at no point in the actual canon stories was Dick ever oblivious to Tim being hurt, uncaring of this, nor did the canon ever try to claim on Dick's behalf that he DIDN'T hurt Tim, y'know?

I talked earlier tonight about the importance of remembering that these are fictional characters who can not CHOOSE any actions for themselves, but rather are ruled entirely by what the writers choose FOR them.

And the thing is.....for all that Dick is often characterized in fanfics as being oblivious or uncaring to having hurt Tim, or say that he kicked Tim out of the house and the city, or that he called Tim crazy or that he chose Damian OVER Tim or all these other things.....

None of those things say anything about Dick or what kind of character he is, despite the fact that fanon and fics have made a huge deal OUT of running with the idea that THOSE acts in fact say a LOT about Dick's actual character or whatever.....

But like, the point is not just that none of those things say anything about Dick simply because they're not how the canon went....

JUST as important, IMO, is the fact that none of those things are even in the BALLPARK of saying anything about Dick's actual character.....

Because the actual canon was written the way it was for the sake of TIM'S story. It was never about trying to make Dick look good, the events played out the way they did because the writer INTENDED there to be conflict between the brothers about it! Dick didn't find some magical way of ensuring that he delivered the news to Tim in the absolute right way possible because he just didn't care enough about Tim's feelings to do so....Damian delivered the news to Tim in the absolute worst way possible BECAUSE the writer WANTED the chasm between Dick and Tim.

THE CONFLICT WAS THE STORY!

And just as importantly.....the same writer who caused the conflict also RESOLVED the conflict. In his own same stories. Tim and Dick may have never hashed over every single detail of Tim's issues with Dick, but there was CLEARLY a reconciliation. Tim showed his forgiveness, his understanding of why Dick had done what he'd done and the fact that he'd made his peace with it, in a variety of ways from telling Dick he still had his trust, joking with Dick in SPECIFIC ways that called back to personal in-jokes that they'd had since the 90s -

(and that in fact were originally written by the same writer....like, the Brady Bunch jokes are a SPECIFICALLY Fabian Nicieza thing, as in he's the only writer who has EVER had Dick and Tim having that particular in joke between them, and he established it when he first wrote Tim, when he and Dick were great during Tim's time as Robin in the 90s. Tim calling back to those jokes during Red Robin and specifically reinviting memories of some of his favorite moments with his brother HIMSELF, like was as clear a peace gesture as you can get, IMO.)

But point is....the conflict happened the way it did, because it was MEANT to happen. There was supposed to be conflict, so by that very token, Dick wasn't MEANT to find the perfect way to handle the Robin situation that made sure Tim didn't suffer any negative feelings about it.

The reason its lasted so long as discourse in fandom was that regardless of the fact that the writers and characters both showed a resolution to the conflict that was deliberately sown to BE a conflict in the first place....

Fans of Tim decided this resolution wasn't adequate enough.

And so the events of it have been tweaked endlessly, as has the fact that the brothers reconciled itself, in order to keep this conflict extended far beyond the parameters or duration of the ACTUAL canon conflict its based on....with Dick further exaggerated into this uncaring instigator because the conflict FANS wanted was one in which Tim was Dick's victim in a way that he was never intended to be by the initial source conflict, which wanted BOTH characters to be somewhat sympathetic but now turned into a one-sided thing where only ONE character is 'deserving' of sympathy.....

But the problem is....that wasn't the story. And this wouldn't BE a problem, due to it being fanfic and fanfic being innately transformative, if not for the fact that people keep trying to point to canon actions as the proof of conclusions they're drawing about Dick's actions in the FANON conflict.....when the only thing the canon actions are meant to serve as the foundation for, is the conflict which ACTUALLY happened AND was resolved in canon!

And the thing is, a lot of fandom have done a lot to compare this situation to Dick losing Robin in the first place, but without actually leaning into that comparison in order to examine how Dick truly felt about that then, and ACTUALLY make it the comparison they're raising it as.....

(people can't claim that they've done this if they themselves are calling the situations parallel and yet clearly holding Tim and his feelings as innately more sympathetic and deserving of understanding than they're willing to even retroactively apply to Dick in the very situation they themselves have invited comparisons to....like if you're STILL calling for Dick's head for what he did with Robin here in a way that you're not having any characters anywhere, even just in reference or passing say that Bruce deserves being chewed out for to similar degrees.....your comparison is rigged from the start, it just is)....

But ultimately at the end of the day, there IS an answer for why Dick wasn't more careful and studious in his handling of the Robin situation....and that answer, for better or worse, is that he wasn't MEANT to be. The handling exists the way it played out, because it was meant to engender a specific conflict, one that was then resolved to the satisfaction of the story's writer.

If that wasn't to the satisfaction of fans, that's understandable! No story ever satisfies all fans!

But the problem is, the transformative nature of fanfic cuts two ways. And this is what people so often conveniently overlook when they cite that you can do anything with fanfic and that its subject to everyone's personal wants and agenda.

Like this is all perfectly true. But what people CAN'T do, is forbid others from drawing conclusions based on what decisions you do and don't make with fanfic.

And the problem with the Red Robin discourse, is we have a conflict that was engineered from the start, and negatively impacted a particular character aka Tim.

And the resolution the canon offered didn't satisfy the itch a lot of Tim's fans had for that particular conflict.

But the thing is.....there's two entirely different ways to tweak a conflict with fanfic.

You can make it BETTER.

Or you can make it WORSE.

And nine out of ten times - with this being especially obvious when you keep in mind that the canon itself DID CREATE RESOLUTION TO ITS OWN CONFLICT - its very apparent that a lot of fans just were not interested in making the resolution of this conflict even BETTER than what we got in the canon.

See, because the reason it happened in canon at all was NOT in fact because Dick was just as uncaring and neglectful as FANON of this conflict makes him out to be....since the reason it happened that way at all was ONLY because the writer needed it to happen in SOME way that sowed conflict between Tim and Dick and sparked Tim's solo journey of self-discovery.....

The only real way to BETTER resolve the conflict of the Robin mantle transition...

Would be for Dick to specifically approach Tim in such a way as to take his feelings about the matter into account and make his argument for why he felt Damian needed this now.

And that's something that's ABSOLUTELY easy to do, because the only reasons things DIDN'T happen that way in the first place, was circumstantial! Because the story was PLOTTED to have Damian spill the beans before Dick even had an opportunity to talk to Tim one on one. Changing a story's direction born of circumstance is one of the easiest things to do with fanfic since all you have to do is write different circumstances! Nobody's character even needs addressing there, because no character is inherently flawed for that story happening the way it did....that's why the story WORKED, in canon! Dick just circumstantially wasn't given even an OPPORTUNITY to be as conscientious about the matter as we would have liked him to be.

Easy, EASY fix with fanfic.

But that's not what fanfic tends to do with this particular story point, is it?

Instead, we get constant worsenings of Dick's motivations, Dick's choices, Dick's reaction to Tim's response, etc, etc.

The slant is entirely one-sided, aimed at making Tim not just more sympathetic, but Dick LESS sympathetic. Making it a nuance-free example of not even two brothers fighting in the face of their mutual grief, but one being VICTIMIZED by the other's willful ignorance of their feelings and loss, while simultaneously demonstrating none of the same himself.

And that's a choice that tons of fanfic writers have made, and they GET to make that choice, but what doesn't get to happen is making everyone else pretend that this was the only way the story COULD have gone, the TRUE resolution it deserved and the thing that ACTUALLY said something indicative of Dick's character.....

When not only were there these other opportunities to resolve the conflict in ways better for BOTH characters....the resolution of the actual conflict is considered irrelevant even though creating a conflict that could be resolved in story was the ONLY reason for the characters making the specific choices they made in the first place!

The discourse is literally all just born of people using the slight against Tim's character as an excuse to make Dick's character look worse. IMO to distract from the fact that this happened at all, because the real gripe was with Tim not being Robin anymore but there was no way to unilaterally decry that WITHOUT making the case that Damian should never have been Robin, and most fans I think recognize that would have been a nonstarter, discourse wise. There’s no rolling the clock back on a new Robin EXISTING, that’s been proven conclusively in the past. Once a character has been a Robin, you can’t argue away their right to ever be one period. If it couldn’t happen with Steph, despite the shortness of her Robin tenure and the smaller size of the girls’ fanbases relative the various Batboys (and let’s not pretend a disparity doesn’t exist there), then it wasn’t going to happen with Damian. So fans made their displeasure known in another way - venting it on the character that precipitated the changing of this particular guard.

And the thing is, ultimately, for all the comparisons made to the Bruce and Dick Robin debacle, they all fall short of being valid given two fundamental differences:

1) Canon has one hundred percent refused to ever fully address the conflict Bruce created in story when he fired Dick or just gave Robin away to Jason, with the only time its ever really been addressed in the comics being when Dick came to confront Bruce about it and Bruce made no form of actual apology or recourse, but instead ultimately just yelled at Dick about missing him and then told him to go. Which umm. Yeah. Oh, the resolution of it all.

2) The other key difference being that while there are certainly fans who have used these story points simply TO make Bruce look worse, the same as I'd argued happened with Dick in the Red Robin scenario.....it is still undeniable that there are a sizable number of fans such as myself who have always insisted we only raise this particular story element because we WANT to see better or actual resolution of the conflict raised in story - aka Bruce firing Dick or just giving away Robin - AS WELL AS being very clear on a perfectly easy way TO showcase better resolution: just having Bruce fucking OWN HIS ACTIONS AND APOLOGIZE FOR THEM.

So even with the awareness that while ultimately both Robin turnovers only happened because the writers chose that conflict happen, they remain incomparable in my mind purely because only one of them was ACTUALLY resolved or treated as resolved in canon, and like.....the other one is the only one that actually has fans continuously making the point of what story actions can actually be taken in meta, headcanons and fics, TO create the resolution we want.....whereas the other conflict will never be resolved any better than it is in canon, because the people who keep raising the conflict don't even want to acknowledge that it even WAS resolved in canon at all, because that would defeat the entire purpose of continuously worsening the conflict specifically TO create reasons for a continued grudge against Dick's character.

And you flat out just can't ever resolve a conflict that people ultimately WANT to exist.

[sohotthateveryonedied]

My ideal YJ season 4, because SOMEONE can’t follow directions and stop making unnecessary time skips that no one wants

(This is written with enough salt to fill the fucking Pacific, I swear.)

First off, no time skips!!! Why, you ask? Because we don’t fucking need one, that’s why. I didn’t turn on Young Justice because I was hoping it would be about a bunch of thirty-year-old has-beens who aren’t even in the superhero game anymore because they can’t throw a punch without shattering their hip. For every year that this show skips, my patience thins just a little bit more.

HOWEVER!!! The introduction of the Legion of Superheroes means we’ll be getting some time travel shit, right?? Some good ol’ time fuckery?? Some timeline shenanigans?? Then how about we get some flashbacks between the past and the future?? Pretty please??? There is no better opportunity to bring back all of the phantoms (literal AND figurative) of the Team’s past than to do it in a season that is LITERALLY titled “Phantoms.” Show us big milestones from the five years between seasons one and two like Dick becoming Nightwing, Wally and Artemis quitting, when all of the freshmen joined up, etc. Have the season center on linked conflicts between the past, present, and future because this is seriously the PERFECT season to do that! Connect Jason’s death to his resurrection! Connect Wally and Artemis quitting the hero gig to Wally’s triumphant return! The possibilities are limitless! And if the writers don’t take this golden opportunity for whatever reason, then guess what!! They’re dumbasses who just missed a huge opportunity that we’ll probably never get again!!!

(Also, let me just say real quick that if Artemis is in a relationship when the season begins, I’m gonna lose my fucking mind. This is an opinion thing so you don’t have to agree, but if she is dating someone to try and “fill the void” after Wally which leads to a whole love triangle thing when he comes back, I will break things. Buildings will fall. Trees will be uprooted and yeeted across nations like goddamn Paul Bunyan. Don’t fucking do it.)

This one goes without saying by now, but Wally West is going to come back. That’s happening. That’s gonna be a thing. I’m almost positive about it, unless of course all of the hints at his return in season 3 were just Voltron-level baiting, which is highly probable at this point. Still, I’m sticking with my faith that Wally will be back before the season ends. Have him be stuck in the Speed Force. Have him be stuck in the Phantom Zone. I don’t care where he comes from, just bring him back home and reunite him with his friends and family, please. Maybe then I can finally rest. (Bonus points if he’s got boosted speed and/or a red and silver Rebirth-style suit!)

Bring in Inertia, AKA Bart’s clone Thad!! I know I had a super good reason for this when @damthosefandoms​ and I talked about it weeks ago, but I honestly forgot all of it. Regardless, I think it’s an excellent idea because Bart deserves the screen time, PLUS he’s already our resident time traveler so why not give him some spotlight in a season all about time travel? And while you’re at it, introduce a wonderfully crafted character who could make the season SO much more interesting, whether he takes Bart’s place in an echo of the mole plot from season one or just as a wild antagonist who is ACTUALLY a teenager like the rest of them. (Looking at you, Lex Luthor and Deathstroke and all of you bad guys who already have gray hair and aren’t remotely interesting anymore.) (Okay, that last part was a lie because they are pretty interesting, but still. Give us some younger villains.)

Also I would really like Bart and Ed to be official because. I mean, did you see their interactions in season four?? The whole “Virgil being a seventh wheel which implies that Bart and Ed are a couple” thing?? Come on, man.

The Phantom Zone!! It’s a thing!!! Use it!!!

This one is more wishful thinking than anything, but I would really dig a huge final battle on Apokolips in the season finale. As wild and shocking as the season three finale was, I was expecting a cool battle sequence between those who were under the influence of the anti-life equation and those who weren’t that never happened, which made the ending seem a bit...empty. What better setup for a battle sequence than the entire Justice League, Team, Outsiders, and Legion fighting together against Darkseid and his minions? It would be incredible.

JASON TODD!!! OUR FAVORITE PHANTOM WHO IS ALREADY REVEALED TO BE ALIVE!!! In my ideal “Under the Red Hood” arc, they would give us a ton of flashbacks (see??? it fits in perfectly with what I said earlier about bouncing between the past and future!!) to Jason’s death which probably happened during a Team mission instead of with Batman and Joker since it’s a Young Justice-centric show and all. Then we get to see the Red Hood operating with the Light as their secret weapon or maybe even their new enforcer until, after a whole season of watching the Batfam struggle to bring their wayward son and brother home, he switches sides and fights alongside them in the final battle. Fucking splendid you funky vigilante.

Additionally, a Red Hood arc gives perfect reasoning for some Batfamily content! Let us know what Cass is like and how she joined up as Orphan before season three. And while you’re at it, let Tim get some spotlight too?? Please?? Maybe even give us some Tim/Stephanie content because the writers wouldn’t drag out a whole boring breaking-up-but-not-really-because-nothing-actually-happens-there-and-they-get-barely-any-screen-time thing for Tim and Cassie if it wasn’t for a good reason. They could show Barbara training Steph to take over as Batgirl, or at the very least have her last scene in the season be of Steph opening a present from Barbara that turns out to be a purple suit with a bat symbol on the chest. It would be spectacular.

And lastly, this one isn’t really relevant even though it is, but. I am more than okay with Damian Wayne not being present in this season. It’s not that I don’t love him, which I do. But the kid was an infant last we saw him, and the only way he could become Robin anytime soon is if Dick were like thirty and I’m Not Here For That. Save Damian for future seasons when you actually need new characters, rather than cramming in a million easter eggs for no reason when you already have a perfectly good main cast right there.

Seriously, Grandon. I’m fucking begging you here.

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Psycho Analysis: Lucifer/Satan

(WARNING! This analysis contains SPOILERS!)

Please allow me to introduce this villain. He’s a man of wealth and taste...

Satan, or Lucifer, or whatever of the hundreds of names across multiple religions, folk tales, urban legends, movies, books, songs, video games, and more that you choose to call him, is without a doubt the biggest bad of them all. He is not just a villain; he is the villain, the bad guy your other bad guys answer to, the lord of Hell. If there’s a bad deed, he’s done it, if there’s a problem, he’s behind it. There’s nothing beneath him, and that’s not just because he’s at the very bottom of Hell. He is the root cause of all the misery in the entire world.

And if we’re talking about Satan, we gotta talk about Lucifer too. They weren’t always supposed to be one and the same, but over centuries of artistic depictions and reimaginings they’ve been conflated into one being, a being that is a lot more layered and interesting than just a simple adversary for the good to overcome when handled properly.

Motivation/Goals: Look, it’s Satan. His main goal is to be as evil as possible, do bad things, cause mischief and mayhem. Rarely does anything good come from Satan being around. If he is one and the same as Lucifer, expect there to be some sort of plot about him rebelling against God, as according to modern interpretations Lucifer fought against God in battle and was then cast out, falling from grace like lightning. When the Lucifer persona is front and center, raging against the heavens tends to be a big part of his schemes, but when the big red devil persona is out and about, expect temptations to sin, birthing the Antichrist, or tempting people to sell their souls.

Performance: Satan has been portrayed by far too many people over the years to even consider keeping count of, though some notable performances of the character or at least characters who are clearly meant to be Satan include the nuanced anti-villain take of the character Viggo Mortensen portrayed in The Prophecy; the sympathetic homosexual man portrayed by Trey Parker in South Park and its film; the hard-rocking badass Dave Grohl portrayed in Tencaious D’s movie; Robin Hughes as a sneaky, double-crossing bastard in “The Howling Man” episode of The Twilight Zone; the big red devil from Legend known as Darkness, played by Tim Curry; the shapeshifting angel named Satan from The Adventures of Mark Train who will make you crap your pants; and while not portrayed by anyone due to being entirely voiceless, Chernabog from Disney’s Fantasia is definitely noteworthy in regards to cinematic depictions of the devil.

Final Thoughts & Score: Satan is a villain whose sheer scope dwarfs almost every other villain in history. It’s not even remotely close, either; Satan pops up in stories all around the world, is the greater-scope villain of most varieties of three major religions, and his very name is shorthand for “really, really evil.” Every other villain I have ever discussed and reviewed wishes they could be a byword for being bad to the bone. Even Dracula, one of the single most important villains in fiction, looks puny in comparison to Satans villainous accomplishments.

Satan in old religious texts tended to be an utterly horrifying force of nature, until Medieval times began portray him as a dopey demon trying to tempt the faithful (and failing). Folklore and media have gone back and forth, portraying both in equal measure – you have the desperate, fiddle-playing devil from “The Devil Went Down to Georgia” and the unseen, unfathomable Satan who may or may not exist in the Marvel comics universe who other demons live in fear of the return of. Satan is just a very interesting and malleable antagonist, one who is defined just enough that he can make a massive, formidable force while still being enough of a blank slate that you can project any sort of personality traits onto him to build an intriguing foe.

One of the most famous examples of this in action is the common depiction of Satan as the king of hell. This doesn’t really have much basis in religion; he’s as much a prisoner as anyone else, though considering how impressive a prisoner he is, he’d be like the big guy at the top of the pecking order in any jail for sure. But still, the idea of Satan as the ruler of hell was clearly conceived by someone and proved such an intriguing concept that so many decided to run with it.

I think that’s what truly makes Satan such an interesting villain, in that he’s almost a community-built antagonist. People over the ages have added so much lore, personality, and power to him that is only vaguely alluded to in old religions to the point where they have all become commonplace in depictions of the big guy, and there really isn’t any other villain to have quite this magnitude on culture as a whole. It shouldn’t be any shock that Satan is an 11/10; rating him any lower would be a heinous crime only he is capable of.

But see, the true sign of how amazing he is is the sheer number of ways one can interpret him. You have versions that are just vague embodiments of all that is bad and unholy, such as Chernabog from Fantasia, you have more nuanced portrayals like the one Viggo Mortensen played in The Prophecy, you have outright sympathetic ones like the one from South Park… Satan is just a villain who can be reshaped and reworked as a creator sees fit and molded into something that fits the narrative they want. I guess what I’m trying to say is that not only is Lucifer/Satan one of the greatest villains of all, he’s also one of the single greatest characters of all time.  

Now, there are far too many depictions of Satan for me to have seen them all, but I have seen quite a lot. Here’s how Old Scratch has fared over the millennia in media of various forms, though keep in mind this is by no means a comprehensive or exhaustive lsit:

“The Devil Went Down to Georgia” Devil: 

I think this is one of my favorite devils in any fiction ever, simply because of what a good sport he is. Like, there is really no denying that Johnny’s stupid little fiddle ditty about chickens or whatever sucks major ass, and yet Satan (who had moments before summoned up demonic hordes to rip out some Doom-esque metal for the contest) gave him the win and the golden fiddle. What a gracious guy! He’s a 9/10 for sure, though I still wish we knew how his rematch ended…

Chernabog: 

Chernabog technically doesn’t do anything evil, and he never says a word, and yet everything about him is framed as inherently sinister. It’s really no wonder Chernabog has become one of the most famous and beloved parts of Fantasia alongside Yen Sid and Sorcerer Mickey; he’s infinitely memorable, and really, how can he not be? He’s the devil in a Disney film, not played for laughs and instead made as nightmarishly terrifying as an ancient demon god should be. Everything about him oozes style, and every movement and gesture begets a personality that goes beyond words. Chernabog doesn’t need to speak to tell you that he is evil incarnate; you just know, on sight, that he is up to no good.

Quite frankly, the implications of Chernabog’s existence in the Disney canon are rather terrifying. Is he the one Maleficent called upon for power? Is he the one all the villains answer to? Do you think Frollo saw him after God smote him? And what exactly did he gain by attacking Sora at the end of Kingdom Hearts? All I know for sure is that Chernabog is a 10/10.

Lucifer (The Prophecy): 

Viggo Mortensen has limited screentime, but in that time he manages to be incredibly creepy, misanthropic… and yet, also, on the side of good. Of course, he’s doing it entirely for self-serving reasons (he wants humanity around so he can make them suffer), but credit where credit is due. The man manages to steal a scene from under Christopher Walken, I think that’s worth a 10/10.

Satan (South Park): 

Portraying Satan as a sympathetic gay man was a pretty bold choice, and while he certainly does fall into some stereotypes, he’s not really painted as bad or morally wrong for being gay, and ends up more often than not being a good (if sometimes misguided) guy who just wants to live his life. Plus he gets a pretty sweet villain song, though technically it’s more of an “I want” song than anything. Ah well, a solid 8/10 for him is good.

Satan (Tenacious D):

It’s Dave Grohl as Satan competing in a rock-off against JB and KG. Literally everything about this is perfect, even if he’s only in the one scene. 10/10 for sure.

Robot Devil:

Futurama’s take on the devil is pretty hilarious and hammy, but then Futurama was always pretty on point. He’s a solid 8/10, because much like South Park’s devil he gets a fun little villain song with a guest apearance by the Beastie Boys, not to mention his numerous scams like when he stole Fry’s hands. He’s just a fun, hilarious asshole.

The Howling Man: 

The Twilight Zone has many iconic episodes, and this one is absolutely one of them. While the devil is the big twist, that scene of him transforming as he walks between the pillars is absolutely iconic, and was even used by real-life villain Kevin Spacey in the big reveal of The Usual Suspects. This one is a 9/10 for sure, especially given the ending that implies this will all happen again (as per usual with the show).

The Darkness:

While he’s more devil-adjacent than anything and is more likely to be the son of Satan rather than the actual man himself, it’s hard not to give a shout-out to the big, buff demon played by Tim Curry in some of the most fantastic prosthetics and makeup you will ever see. He gets a 9/10 for the design alone, the facty he’s Tim Curry is icing on the cake.

[dcomicsficrecs]

Got any good longish casefic recs? Got a loooong trip and I need something to keep me occupied. Thank you so much!!

First of all, thank you for sending this ask! I love case-heavy stories and long fics, so that was an opportunity to re-discover some of my favorite stories. I am going to re-read half of the list now, as well!

Here we go - top ten recommendations for long(ish) case fics!

1) detective stories series by prismatical starting with bad signal (38K)

The rescue mission went well. Nightwing is safe. Everything should be alright.

Right?

It’s a really gripping story that will keep you on the edge of your seat till the end. Features all of Batfam with Dick as a focus but other boy Robins play significant part too.

2) For Those Who Can't  by  GoAwayOlivia (8K)

They don’t understand him at all. There is no setting him off, that’s not the way it works. And he doesn’t go on violent sprees. Jason kills when the situation demands. That’s it. Plain and simple. He doesn’t lose his temper and murder any asshole that pisses him off. Every kill is a decision that he makes, and every decision is carefully weighed and measured with a cool head. He only ever kills because the person deserves to die.

Red Hood!Jason conducts investigation into a sting of murders that happened on his territory. I have a lot of feelings about this story and I’m sure you will, too.

3)  Raisin Delight  by  LemonadeGarden (8K)

A year after Jason Todd dies, Tim Drake and Bruce Wayne take on the case when they notice strange occurrences in Gotham city. This has disastrous consequences, but so do most things that Tim gets caught up in, so what's new, really.

It’s not only a case fic but also a time travel fic which is, imo, a double treat! The ending is very powerful even if I expect you’re going to have mixed feelings about it.

4)  Little Wing and Big Bird by Airawyn (16K)

When Bruce attempts to murder Jason in his sleep, the young Robin goes to his predecessor for help. Nightwing and Robin must work together to find out what happened to the real Bruce Wayne.

Fic featuring Robin!Jason teaming up with Nightwing!Dick. The boys save Bruce and Alfred and have a heart-to-heart in the process. Superb.

5) Some fics from More to Being a Father than Having a Kid by Romiress:

We Don't Raise Heroes (70K), Don't Call It Revenge (58K), Legacy's Sway (107K)

While technically not a case fic but include a big mysteries that Batfam investigates so I think it counts. I highly recommend the whole series. First fics are gen!

6) The Bat's Crest by livierambles (200K+)

Tragedy strikes the hero community when Bruce Wayne commits a crime so heinous even the best start asking for blood. However, as the heroes try to recover from the hit and carry out justice for their friends, a random assortment of people start acting oddly, including the current Speedy Tim Drake, a child hostage in Gotham, and a young man from an unremarkable circus amongst others. All of them seem intent on saving Bruce Wayne from the grasp of the Justice League for no apparent reason, going as far as betraying their previous allegiances.

Unknown to the Justice League, these people are equally confused. Clearly they're stuck in another dimension, but how do they get back? How did they even get here? Who else is stuck in this world? And how long will Tim's patience last? Back home, the Bat was a planetary symbol that struck fear in the hearts of criminals. In this new world, it has no meaning, save for the handful of stranded souls.

All Batfam is featured. While this is also technically not a case fic but adventure/dimension travel fic, its plot has a mystery element to it and characters have to investigate a lot as far as I remember. It’s probably the only WIP here on this list but god, is it worth to read and bookmark it. You know what? I’m even going to go ahead and subscribe to the author, too.

7) The Volatile Verse (117K) by BlackFriar, starting with Volatile (47K)

After a transdimensional mishap, Batman and Robin are faced with a murderous Joker rampaging through Gotham and an anti-hero who is determined to remove Robin from the crime-fighting business. Can they strike a balance before it all ends in tragedy and the Joker has the last laugh?

It’s a dimension travel case fic (series of fics, actually!) set in Young Justice with Robin!Dick and main universe!Red Hood!Jason. It’s a great story that doesn’t shy away from darker themes, can and probably will make you cry, but it also has hopeful ending. This Jason is going to be okay with these Bruce and Dick, and at the end of the day, after the case is solved, what else do you need?

8) I saved one of the best till the end, and it’s basically anything by Mikimoo

Fair warning, most of their fics are jaydick. My favorites are:

8.1 Between The Bars (48K)

A number of suspicious deaths at South Haven Penitentiary are being ignored by the authorities, but have attracted the attention of various other parties.

OR:

That one time Dick and Jason accidentally ended up undercover on the same mission and started a riot.

8.2 And If I Recover (33K)

Officer Dick Grayson is captured by a criminal group that makes it's living from torture and extortion. Half the family are forced to watch as events unfold, while the rest franticly try to track down the culprits.

8.3 That Awful Bitter Taste (30K)

Roped in to find out what has happened to Dick on an undercover mission, Jason finds himself faced with situations that challenge his personal identity. Meanwhile, Dick is having to face demons from his past, and Jason is not sure if he is helping or hurting.

But of course, the best time to have this particular existential crisis is while trying not to die in the desert, and being chased by angry men with guns.

8. 4 This Night (33K)

The Red Hood and Officer Grayson are on the same case.  A small misstep has far reaching consequences for them both.

All those fics are tagged as jaydick, and most of them have high rating but it’s for graphic description of violence so read the warnings before reading.

Even if you aren’t a jaydick shipper, those fics are plot-heavy and case-focused. The relationship dynamic and its progress would be natural and heartfelt as well.

Also, if asked to choose only one fic from the author, or only one jaydick, or only one case fic, I probably would have chosen Between The Bars, just so you know.

9. Two Birds on a Wire by  empires, pentapus (20K)

Dick asks Jason for help on a case. Jason should have never agreed.

It’s so popular you probably read it already. Still, just in case, I will include it too because it’s such a great undercover mission fic.

10)  Crimes at Night by empires (16k)

It's summer in Gotham, and the city is experiencing a record breaking heatwave and a rash of violence centered around a strange new drug circulating through the city's youth. Robin is determined to locate the drug's source and put an end to the distribution before things get worse.

Young Justice verse, Robin!Dick and never adopted!Jason, jaydick. It’s a great AU and well-executed case fic and if you’re into Jason/Dick, their relationships are very cute also.

[damianwaynerocks]

Zuko & the Waynes - Chapter 3

Batfam/ATLA au

Description:  Prince Zuko, pre-finding Aang, falls into Gotham City. After being adopted by Bruce Wayne, Zuko finds himself enjoying life in this strange world. Zuko Wayne has a family who loves him unconditionally. Zuko Wayne is a hero, saving the innocents of Gotham City every night. But Zuko soon finds himself at the center of a plot that threatens to destroy not only this new world he's come to love, but also the world he's trying to leave behind.

A/N: okay, so the members of the titans and young justice team are different in this au.

Young Justice: Tim Drake (Red Robin); Cassie Sandsmark (Wondergirl); Kon/Conner Kent (Superboy); Bart Allen (Impulse)

Titans: Dick Grayson (Nightwing); Koriand'r (Starfire); Garfield Logan (Beast Boy); Rachel Roth (Raven); Jaime Reyes (Blue Beetle); M'Gann M'orris (Miss Martian)

Chapter 2 | Masterlist

Chapter 3:

"So, you remember the plan?"

"Yeah, we got it," said Cassie into her earpiece, having to raise her voice to be heard over the pouring rain outside. "Don't worry about us, we're fine."

"Good to know," Tim responded into the comlink.

It was the night of the auction. Zuko was wearing a black suit while Cassie was wearing a red dress. Both had their masks on. Kon, also known as Superboy, was sitting in the driver's seat. He was acting as their chauffeur, and was there as backup in case anything went wrong. Zuko rolled his eyes as he heard a slurping sound in his com link, presumably from Tim taking a sip of coffee.

 "That was gross," Kon sighed. "Don't do that." 

Tim ignored him. "Proud of you both. Remember, if the wrong person gets their hands on the magyntite, not even Superman will be able to stop them." He paused. "No pressure, though.”

"Wow, you're great at pep talks." Zuko adjusted the mask on his face, making sure it hid his scar. "You ready, Cassie?"

"I was born ready," Cassie responded with a grin. "Now, let's go, Henry."

"After you, Larissa." Zuko grabbed an umbrella and stepped out of the  self-driving black limousine they'd borrowed from Bruce. He went around to her side of the vehicle and opened her door for her. Cassie looped her arm through his, muttering a thank you as Zuko raised the umbrella above both of them. They walked into the casino.

 Just inside, a bouncer stepped in front of them. "How tall is the eagle's wingspan?"

"That means do magic," Tim said through the coms.

 "Uh," Zuko's mind raced as he tried to think of a spell on the spot. "Fire Dragon Iron Fist!" he finally said, and a ball of fire appeared over his closed fist. The bouncer nodded, and unhooked the red rope, allowing them to step inside.It was bright and loud and flashy, and Zuko had to stop for a moment to get his bearings.

 "You good?" Cassie whispered, placing a hand on his chest to steady him. "It's okay. Let's just go downstairs, follow me." She gently led him towards the back of this casino. Tim had told them that there was a staircase behind the bathrooms, and the basement was where the auction was taking place.They walked past the doors that said 'men' and 'woman' and opened the third door, revealing stairs going down to a concrete basement. "You okay now?" Cassie asked as they began to descend. 

 "Yeah," Zuko grunted. "I'm fine." They walked down a dark and damp hallway, a stark contrast to the bright lights and clean floors of the upper floor. The reached a huge room with a wrap around balcony overlooking the bottom floor. Many people, all wearing masks, were crowded together. 

"It's about to start, Mr. Henry," Cassie said. "Let's go sign in." The pair walked through the people until they reached the stairs leading to the bottom floor. Arms still linked, they walked down the stairs. 

"There's a ton of people here," Zuko mused. "I wonder what they all want to buy." 

Cassie shrugged. "Drugs. Artifacts. Who knows." 

They made their way to the middle of the throng of people and sat down in two of the chairs. The auction started soon after, and the words the auctioneer was saying sounded like white noise to Zuko. Finally, twenty minutes in, Tim's voice in his ear made Zuko flinch. "Magyntite is next," he said. "Be ready."

Sure enough, the man held up a silver briefcase. "Magyntite!" he yelled. "This drug is like Kobra Venom! Bulk up your muscles, lady and gentlemen. Do I hear... two million?" Zuko raised his hand and the same time another man did. The man glared at Zuko, who did the same.Back and forth this happened, Zuko and this man trying to get the magyntite. In the end, though, Zuko and Cassie got it for $45,000,000.

 "Holy crap," Cassie breathed as they walked back up the stairs. "That man wanted to kill you." 

Zuko hummed. "He isn't the only one." 

Cassie gave him an amused look."Is that so, Sir Henry?"

"Indeed it is, Lady Larissa."

Golden eyes gazed into blue for a second, both having small smiles on their faces.

  "Yo, you guys get it?"

"Uh, yeah," Cassie replied, breaking eye contact. "Yeah, we're heading back now." 

Zuko's face reddened. He hadn't felt any feeling similar to that since Mai, when he was thirteen. He shook his head to clear it. Don't be stupid, he told himself. Don't even go there. No chance of that happening.

"You good?" Cassie asked, raising an eyebrow under her mask. Zuko cleared his throat and nodded a little too quickly.

"Me? I'm great. Splendid. Never been better!" he babbled. "Oh Agni, I bet Kon is going crazy! Uh, let's go see him!" He linked his arm with Cassie's and half-led half-drug her through the club and out the door.

"And the lovely couple returns!" Kon cheered as Zuko opened the door for Cassie. "I missed you! Tim told me I couldn't listen to my podcast because I had to stay alert so I've been bored out of my mind."

"Oh, poor baby!" Cassie mocked. "Do you need a massage and a nice cup of tea?"

"I do, actually."

"Too bad, Superbrat."

 Zuko looked out the window. He missed his uncle's tea.

 Only 11 more months. 

___

The next morning, Zuko, Duke and Damian were at the table eating breakfast. Zuko was about to put a piece of bacon in his mouth when he felt eyes on him. Looking up, he frowned as he met Duke's eyes. "What?

Duke's eyebrows were furrowed in disbelief. "Dude, it's 7:00 in the morning. Why are you already dressed?" 

Zuko blinked. While the others were in their pajamas- Duke in an old t-shirt and shorts and Damian in his silk robe -Zuko was in jeans and a Ralph Lauren button-up, his hair in a topknot. He would've put shoes on, if it weren't for Alfred's no-shoes-in-the-house rule. "I'm used to getting up at dawn and getting ready. It's what I've done for three years."

Duke shook his head. "You're making me feel like a slob, Zu."

 "You will not feel that way for long," Damian spoke up. "For I hear Drake coming down the stairs." 

Sure enough, Tim walked around the corner, staggering to the table. He was in an over sized black Superman shirt and his boxers with a blanket wrapped around his shoulders. His long hair was a mess, and the circles under his eyes made it look as though he had been punched in the face.  Alfred pulled out a chair beside Zuko, a cup of coffee already in his hand. Tim stumbled towards the chair, looking as though he was about to pass out. He sat down in the chair slowly, and Alfred immediately put the cup of coffee in front of him. Tim blinked slowly, before picking up the coffee and bringing it to his lips. 

"Well," Duke chuckled. "I no longer feel like a slob." 

Damian wrinkled his nose, scoffing at Tim. "You are a disgrace, Drake. Have some self respect." Tim stared at him owl-eyed in response.

 "Just give him like ten minutes," Duke said. "Anyways! So I heard you went on a mission last ni-"

"Master Duke!" Alfred interrupted him sharply. "Might I remind you the rules of breakfast?" 

Duke seemed to shrink into himself as he answered in a small voice, "No vigilante talk at the breakfast table." Alfred nodded in approval before going back into the kitchen. Duke turned back to Zuko. "Later."

Zuko hummed in response. 

--

As soon as breakfast was over, Duke ran to Zuko excitedly. "So!? How'd it go?"

"It went fine," Zuko replied. "I mean, we went in, got the stuff and got back in the car."

"That's it? No fights?"

"No fights."

"What about Cassie? Any emotions?" 

Zuko coughed, his eyes widening. "What!? No! Don't be stupid!"

Duke laughed. "Dude, you're gonna have to get better at lying if you want to join the business."

"Which could start right now, if you want." Zuko and Duke whirled around to see Bruce holding a cup of coffee. "You've been here for a month. You can fight and you're smart. You're welcome to start training today, if you want."

Zuko's jaw dropped. "Uh, yeah! That'd be great!" 

Bruce smiled."Fantastic. Go get changed into something comfortable and we'll start."

Zuko practically sprinted to his room, but before he could change, his phone chimed.

Cassie Sandsmark: good morning doofus

.Zuko grinned in spite of himself.

Zuko Wayne: good morning!

Cassie Sandsmark: how'd you sleep?

Zuko Wayne: great but i don't know if tim slept at all he's barely alive right now

Cassie Sandsmark: sounds like tim

Cassie Sandsmark: so when u joining the hero business

Zuko Wayne: right now,, I'm about to start training

Cassie Sandsmark: YAY TELL ME HOW IT GOES

Zuko Wayne: of course

__

Training, Zuko decided, was difficult. It'd been a month since he'd started, and while he was improving, he was sore and sick of computers. 

"If I have to break another one of Tim's codes, I'll kill myself," he groaned, flopping on to the couch beside Damian, who nodded. 

"Every time Drake speaks, I want to kill myself." Zuko eyed him wearily.

"That's harsh."

"Such is reality." Damian flipped to the next page of the book he was reading. "So, your first patrol is tomorrow?" 

Zuko grinned."Yeah. I'm so excited." He sat up, cracking his knuckles. "Gonna be a blast."

"Are you finally adequate at lying?" 

Zuko winced. "It took me a while but yeah, I got it."

 "Good. We cannot have you exposing our secret." He looked up from his book. "Christmas is next month. Pennyworth instructed me to inform you that he needs a list of what you wish."

Zuko groaned. "I have no idea what I want."

"Well, figure it out," Damian replied. "Because if you do not, I'll have to listen to the complaining."

__

It was the night of his first patrol. Zuko turned to the mirror. His suit was a black kevlar lined jumpsuit with an obsidian utility belt and combat boots of the same color. There was a blue bat symbol across the chest, and a demon-type stage mask of the same color on his face. He looked at the blue gauntlet on his wrist and flexed his arm.

Dick whistled lowly. "Lookin' sharp, Zu."

Zuko grunted in response, but he couldn't stop the corners of his lips from twitching upwards.

"Good to see you suited up," Bruce said as he saw his son. He turned to the Bat Computer and typed something in. "Alright. Nightwing and Robin, you take the east side. Red Hood and Black Bat, you take the west. Red Robin, you take south. Blue Spirit and I will take north."

"You got it, boss man," said Jason with a mock salute. At that, the vigilantes headed out.

"Remember," Bruce began as he and Zuko got into the Batmobile. "Code names in the field." Zuko nodded.

"I won't forget, Batman."

"Good to hear, Blue Spirit." 

After a few minutes if driving, Oracle spoke. "Croc is robbing a store on the corner of North and Order," she said. "Blue Spirit and Batman are closest."

"We're on it," Bruce said, and sped up. 

They reached the corner in five minutes, and jumped out of the car. "Croc!" Bruce yelled.

A huge reptilian humanoid turned toward the voice, and smiled. "Batman!" he chirped. "And who's this?"

"Blue Spirit," Zuko said stiffly. 

Killer Croc chuckled."New kid to destroy? I love that." 

Croc rushed him, snapping his jaws viciously. Zuko jumped into the air, doing a flip over the creature. Fire blasted out of his elbow and he punched Croc in the snout as he turned. 

Croc stumbled back. "Igniting your elbow to increase the force of your punch? Smart. Not smart enough." He ran towards Zuko again, claws outstretched, moving at inhuman speeds. Zuko ducked under his claws and gave an uppercut with the same advantage into his stomach. Croc was thrown into the air by the force. Before he could land, Zuko sent a blast of fire at him, engulfing him in flames. Croc screamed and fell to the ground, charred and smoking.

 "He's still alive," Bruce said gruffly. "Not bad. I'll call Gordon." Zuko's chest swelled with pride, but he simply nodded. 

"There's a robbery at the R&D center of Enterprises," Oracle said suddenly.

"Blue Spirit and I are going to check it out," Bruce answered.

"10-4," Dick replied. "Call if you need backup." Bruce grunted in response and, gesturing for Zuko to follow, jumped back into the Batmobile before speeding off.

"R&D?" Zuko echoed what Oracle had said earlier. "What's that?"

"It's the Research and Development Center," Bruce replied. "It's where we store Batman Inc. tech that's still in production."

"Oh."

“That's right. If anyone succeeds in getting their hands on what's in there-"

"-They'll get their hands on everything." Zuko bit the inside of his cheek. "It's fine. We can do this."

A hint of a smile ghosted across Bruce's lips, so small that Zuko wasn't sure if it'd even been there in the first place.

__

The Research and Development Center of Wayne Enterprises was primarily used to develop advancements in technology. These advancements ranged from more effective cancer treatments to new engines for vehicles.The blueprints listed the building as being eight stories. Unbeknownst to the majority of WE's employees, there was a basement. A basement hidden far below the actual building, so far below than an express elevator was needed. This basement was where the technology for Batman Inc. was developed.

Unlike the secret basement of Falcone's club, this basement was in pristine condition. It had a hospital feel to it, with white flooring, walls, and ceiling. 

Bruce and Zuko had just grappled down the elevator shaft was landed at the end of one of the basement's hallways."The only alarm that's been triggered was the entry alarm," said Bruce. "The rooms where the... merchandise are kept have separate alarm systems. Can you tell me what this means, Blue Spirit?"

"The intruder either doesn't know what exactly is down here, or they just haven't managed to get into the rooms yet." Zuko frowned. "Wait, if they figured out this place was here then that means they definitely know what's down here. So then they haven't found the location of the 'merchandise.'"

"And you believe that to be the most probable scenario?"

"Well... yeah. I mean, unless they managed to bypass the alarm system. But that's impossible, this place is un-hackable ever since that incident with Ra's al Ghul. The security system is invincible. Right?"

"Rule of thumb, Blue Spirit," Bruce grunted, raising his arm closer to his face to he could activate his gauntlet. "Nothing is invincible. Everything has a weakness. Some are harder to find than others, but the only thing that is truly invincible is God Himself. And I don't think He would have any reason to break into Wayne Enterprises."

"Okay, but they tripped the alarm when they came in," Zuko pointed out. "So they must not have been able to hack the system."

"Unless they want us here."

Zuko sucked in his teeth. "So that's what you think? This is a trap?"

"It isn't a trap if we know about it," Bruce countered. "Here, I'm pulling up the motion sensors." Sure enough, the holographic screen coming from the gauntlet showed motion in room 121.

"Is that one of the rooms?" Zuko asked. 

Bruce nodded."Yes." He and Zuko started to run in the direction of the before mentioned room. "There's very dangerous technology in there. We need to stop this intruder now." The two were sprinting, taking twists and turns through the winding hallways until Bruce stuck his arm out, signaling for Zuko to stop. In front of them was room 121, the door ajar.

"Holy crap," Zuko whispered. "They hacked us."

"They hacked us," Bruce echoed. "And now they're going to pay. Manuever 13. Be cautious." Bruce rolled a metal ball into the room, and it exploded into smoke Using the smoke as cover, Zuko and Bruce dashed into the room. 

Using the heat signatures to see through the smoke, Zuko jumped forward, swinging down his broadswords in arc. His eyes widened as they hit air; the person had disappeared."What-" he broke off as someone landed a hit to his spine. Zuko whirled around, kicking out at his attacker, yet his foot hit air as the assailant dodged again.

"A teleporter?" he muttered. A laugh hit his ears, and the assailant landed another hit to the back of his head. Zuko tried to return the hit with one of his own but, of course, he missed.So far, Zuko noticed, they were teleporting closely around him. They were staying in close proximity with him. It would be hard to deduce where exactly they would strike, unless he limited their options.

Zuko stomped on the ground, and a ring of fire flared up around him. The attacker led out a gut wrenching scream as they were caught in the flames.He caught a glimpse of a person in a black suit clutching their arm before they teleported above his head, aiming a dropkick above him.

 But Zuko had anticipated this. He grabbed their leg from above and slammed them on the ground. They landed with a crack and coughed.

"You just broke my spine, you asshole," the person wheezed. They were still now, and Zuko could see she was a girl with long brown hair in a wine-colored robe. 

Zuko gulped, forcing down the rising panic at the girl's words. "Maybe you shouldn't have tried to break my skull."

The girl shrugged. "Just following orders."

"Who are you!?" Zuko snarled. "Tell me! Who are you and what do you want with this technology!?"

"Well, if you must know," the girl said, pain evident in her voice despite her calm tone. "I am but a servant of The Lady of the Dual Skies."

"The Lady of the Dual Skies?" Zuko echoed. "What does that mean?"

"Nothing's taken," Bruce said as he crossed his arms from where he stood behind Zuko. "Nothing has even been tampered with. You clearly weren't looking for anything here. So what did you want?"

"The Lady does not permit me speaking with anybody but you." The girl was speaking directly to Zuko, not sparing Bruce a glance. "She has something she wishes you to know."

Zuko narrowed his eyes behind his mask. "And what would that be?"

The girl grinned wickedly. "She says she'll see you soon."

With that, a portal opened up under the girl and she disappeared in a flash of purple light.

[vivian24l]

New Young Justice~Part 1

“Superboy, Tornado Twins! Get the citizens to safety!” Robin called out.

“On it!” the eager Twins and Superboy answered in unison. 

The son of Superman flew into the building and dashed through as many rooms as he could, carrying the residents to safety. The twins of the Flash ran from room to room, removing far more people out of the building.

“Red Hood, any traces of the one who started this?” he asked through the comms.

“No, there’s no sign of anyone or anything. It could just be an accident,” she suggested. The daughter of Red Arrow landed next to Robin.

Robin pushed that problem out of his mind and focused on how to put the fire down. It was past midnight in Happy Harbor when the fire suddenly erupted. The Team had boomtubed to the burning hospital a few minutes after the fire had started. 

“We need to put the fire out,” he said, looking for a source of water.

As soon as the words left his mouth, the building glowed with purple light. 

“AZARATH . . . METRION . . . ZINTHOS” The words boomed from the center of the hospital. 

Robin ran towards the hospital, wanting to find the source. It sounded female. Perhaps she started the fire, he thought. 

“Robin!” Red Hood called.

Don dashed towards him. “What are you doing?” he asked.

“I’m finding the source,” Robin answered. His eyes widened as he saw the fire around him start to diminish into nothing.

“Whoa! Look, the damage done by the fire is also gone,” Don pointed out. There were no signs of burns on the doors and walls, everything looked neat and orderly.

The rest of his teammates joined them. They marveled at the sight of the building’s interior. 

“What happened here?�� Superboy asked.

“Don’t know, bro. The fire just disappeared and everything fixed itself,” Don replied.

“Hey, guys! We have company,” Dawn said, gesturing to a figure in a dark cloak.

The person was on their knees and breathing hard. 

Being the leader, Robin approached the being, who looked up to face him. He immediately knew the person was a girl. She had big purple eyes and a pale skin. Under her cloak, she wore a navy leotard and black boots.

“What are you doing here?” he asked, with his usual harsh manner.

“Saving your lives,” she answered, glaring at him while she rose from her position. “A ‘thank you’ would’ve been nice.”

Superboy interceded before any more words could be thrown. “I apologize for our teammate. Thank you for helping us. I’m Superboy. That’s the Tornado Twins-”he gestured to the twin speedsters, “Red Hood-” he pointed at the archer in red, “And lastly, this is Robin,” he gestured to their leader.

“I know who you are, but thank you anyways,” said the girl, her tone taking a kinder turn when she spoke to Superboy. “I’m-”

“Raven!” Zatanna ran towards them. She reached the younger girl. “Are you hurt? What happened? Why are you here?” she bombarded Raven with questions.

“I’m fine Zee. I felt Clarion’s presence and tracked him here; He decided to set this place on fire as a last attempt to get away,” explained Raven. “I caught him, though. I teleported him to Dr. Fate.”

“Well done, Raven,” the magician praised her protege. “But next time, please let me know before you head off, it worries me.”

“Sorry, although I did leave a note on your door,” Raven apologized.

“Your notes are never clear,” joked Zatanna.

Robin, getting impatient, cleared his throat. “Apologies for interrupting your precious moment, but would you like to explain to us why Clarion is in the city?”

The older magician turned to the Team. “We don’t know why, but I assure you he is being contained this very moment. It’s very late. You guys should probably get home and rest. We’ll see you again tomorrow,” she said.

Before Robin could pose another question, Raven raised her arm out in front of her. They were engulfed in black magic and disappeared. 

~For @rana-writes  Thank you for the plot ideas.

[astyle-alex]

[Fanfic] Museum Mishap | the BatFam

I’m posting an older fanfic to kick off my attempt to be more involved with the Tumblr Fandom community!

Museum Mishap  |  Chapter 6/6

Fandom: the DC Universe, Batman & co. Pairings: Jay x Tim Characters: Jason Todd, Tim Drake, Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson Rating: Gen Audiences Warnings: None

Total Word Count: 38,590

Summary:

Middle-School Tim Drake is on a field trip to the Science Museum, but with a WE exhibition of top-secret new technologies being staged in the basement, Tim separates from his classmates and breaks into the staff-only areas by using the skills he's developed over years of stalking Batman and Robin.

Current-Robin Jason Todd catches him in the act, but he's not there to confront Tim for trespassing or truancy - he's there because there's a rumor on the street that Tim Drake knows Batman's real name. And the rumor's gaining ground, quick, drawing in the wrong kind of attention.

When a Drug-Lord decides to take the rumor seriously enough to kidnap the little genius, Jason jumps into the crossfire. It all goes downhill from there. Fast.

(Jason is 14, Tim is 12)

||  Read on Ao3 | Read on FF.net | Follow my updates on Patreon  ||

Museum Mishap Chapter 6: Safe

           It’s five weeks after Jason disobeyed Batman’s orders to drop the idea of investigating the rumor that a random rich kid knew the vigilantes’ secret identities.

           Five weeks since Jason let himself be kidnapped by the upstart drug lord Lorenzo Sabini in an attempt to protect the kid who was Sabini’s real target – the kid rumored to know impossible things about Batman and Robin.

           Five weeks since Jason’s leg was broken – in the line of a duty he never should’ve been asked to shoulder, never should’ve been allowed to feel bound to carry – and Bruce Wayne rediscovered the impossible duality of being responsible for the life of a child that he’d somehow managed to forget. That had faded from his mind when Dick had grown up enough to go off on his own – without his Guardian having any legal say in stopping him.

           Batman has been able to bury the raging concern, the guilt he bears for introducing Jason to such a dangerous lifestyle – for not doing more to discourage his interest. Batman is able to silence the voice that says Jason acted honorably, if stupidly, by insisting that Robin needs to do better, to be better, so that he can keep the boy inside the costume safer.

           But Bruce is having trouble letting Jason heal.

           ‘Suffocating’ Jason calls his attentions, merely ‘stupid codling he doesn’t need’.

           Jason submitted to three weeks of strictly bedrest – a godsend if Bruce could ever believe in such things. He’d offered only mild resistance to being benched for six weeks – to rigorous and thorough PT, and light, careful exercise and a slow return to the training regimen that kept shaping Robin’s growing body into something more heroic than the average simple human.

           But there was no point in even trying to bring up the idea of retiring Jason’s pixie boots for good – of trying to convince him to stand down from the Vigilante fight.

           Bruce knows that, but he still tries it – once, in a terse conversation that gets shut down before he even makes it to the first point of reasoning – and then he swallows the rest of the worry and buries it in silence alongside his fury at Jason’s constant reckless disregard for his own safety. Bruce knows he can’t stop Jason, can’t force him out of the cape, so Batman vows to train him harder, push him further, make him stronger, make him faster, more durable, more prepared – keep him safer.

           It’s a compromise.

           And it has to be enough.

           Because Jason is already back on his feet.

           He broke his own way out of the cast almost a week ago – refused to apologize or sit for another casting – and though Alfred’s managed to somehow force him into a sturdy brace, guilted him into maintaining his use of the crutches… Jason’s been back inside the Cave twice already while Batman has been out – at least twice.

           The Cave’s security cameras have caught him on the Salmon Ladder the last two nights in a row – going through two sets his first night back, and four the next. So that was two nights, at least, that security footage showed Jason working out inside the Cave, but it was possible there were nights he wasn’t tagged on the Cave’s security footage. Dick had certainly learned to sneak down without being caught on camera. Bruce doubted that Dick would share his secrets with Jason – but it was not beyond possibility.

           Bruce kept meaning to add more cameras, to ensure that every inch of the cave was covered by an unblinking eye equipped with filters in Starlight and infrared, but that project kept getting sidelined somehow. He kept getting distracted.

           Because his kids kept getting hurt.

           But it’s been five weeks since Jason got hurt.

           He’s getting better, and his bullheaded determination is just the same as it was before the injury – the stubborn streak still apparent, now even more so if anything had changed.

           But there’s something else about Jason that’s different.

           Bruce almost can’t see it – almost convinces himself it’s not happening, because he’s so damn hopeful that it is happening that his chest constricts with this strange kind of joy or pride or something and he doesn’t know what to do with it.

           Because Dick and Jason are talking.

           Not fighting, talking.

           Alfred’s caught them playing video games. Together.

           They were supposed to be doing homework – Jason’s been back at school for three weeks and while Dick’s purposefully selected freshman college classes don’t require constant attendance, they do give assignments that need to be turned in online – but still…

           Dick and Jason are getting along.

           His adopted sons are becoming brothers.

           Bruce notices.

           And wants it to be real so badly that it hurts.

           Batman notices, too.

           But Batman notices other things, as well.

           Batman notices how the Wayne Boys have befriended the kid Jason got himself kidnapped alongside.

           Batman notices how Nightwing volunteers to swing off on his own every night for a cursory once over of deterrence through Coventry and around the area in the Upper West Side where Sabini’s gang and the rumors they’d acted on had run amok – had being the operative word, seeing as how the entire area had been scared so straight there hasn’t even been a purse snatching in over a month.

           Batman notices how quiet the supposed-civilian kid at the center of those rumors is when he’s home alone – which is often – how the only thing he talks about out loud, in range of Batman’s listening devices, is how much he admires the caped crusaders and how much he wants for their ramshackle team to work together as brothers and sisters in arms – to work through their issues and be a kind of family.

           Batman notices.

           And he watches.

           And he’s concerned by what he sees.

           So tonight, as Nightwing swings off towards Coventry – with a big smile and a wholly unnecessary flip – Batman decides to investigate the kid firsthand.

           The civilian’s name is Timothy Jackson Drake and he is twelve years old, enrolled as a sixth grader at Gotham Preparatory Academy Primary Campus. His parents are Jack and Janet Drake, famed globe-trotting researchers and archeologists, and the second generation of Drakes to head up Drake Industries – a leading Wayne Enterprises competitor. The Drakes reside in the mansion that neighbors the Wayne Estate – another statement of how DI both complements and competes with WE.

           Timothy Drake seems mostly unremarkable.

           He’s skipped two grades, and his teachers say he’s got a remarkable mind, but he lacks significant social skills and spends most of his time alone – tinkering with some project or other. He’s never demonstrated a particular drive to be anything when he grows up, but he’s applied to the Wayne Tech summer camps three years in a row – despite being under the age requirement – and his bedroom is littered with DI equipment and half-finished robots he’s clearly engineered himself in the hours and hours he spends unsupervised.

           Lucius Fox likes him.

           In the way that some people like puppies.

           Bruce isn’t even entirely sure how Lucius Fox discovered the Drake kid, but it’s in his files in the Batcomputer – Fox has his name on a recruitment list, circled in red sharpie with a smiley face next to it.

           So, Timothy Drake is a smart kid.

           But he’s just a kid.

           According to all of Batman’s information, Timothy Drake is just a kid.

           A civilian who happened to have a bad stroke of luck and got his name wrapped up in a rumor founded on nothing more than a junkie’s word and some evidence that the kid in question was a vigilante fan.

           Is still a fan, somehow, despite the circumstance that admiration landed him in.

           Timothy Jackson Drake seems like nothing more than a dedicated fan – a child, not a threat. But the evidence is so peculiar – there are ridiculously strong indications that the rumor carried truth, and yet… the notion that the child knows nothing is so convincing that Dick and Jason agree on it… which in and of itself makes the evidence seem suspect…

           Thus, Batman is set on investigating the matter further for himself.

           A twelve year old civilian would be in bed at this time of night, tucked safely into the labyrinth of the Drake Mansion.

           So as Nightwing peals away to the west, Batman plots a course northward.

           He’s planned this carefully. His choice of direction does not immediately alert Nightwing to his intentions. He’s been rotating where he patrols after splitting off from Nightwing, moving counterclockwise by a dozen blocks every few days. Now he’s pointed right towards the Robbinsville area, where he’s stashed one of his getaway vehicles – a rather bland, all-black motorcycle that’s nothing special, but is quick and maneuverable enough to get him to the Drake Estate and back before Nightwing realizes he’s deviated.

           He even has Batgirl prepped to back Nightwing up if something happens – Barbara is visiting her father this weekend and doing research for her own case in Chinatown. She might not be actively patrolling, but Batman had been sure to give her warning of his activities.

           He trusts her discretion, and he knows she would be as worried as him about Nightwing's probable – and possibly willful – oversight of the threat posed by Drake. Batman does not want to think Nightwing would be so foolish as to dismiss a threat simply because it doesn't seem actively threatening – or worse, because he wanted to curry favor with his adoptive brother – But it’s always better to be safe.

           So, Batman is tracking north – from slightly further east than he’d originally planned, drawn off course by what seemed to be a mugging, but quickly resolved as Batman ID'd a drunk man resisting as his friend took away his keys – and he’s determined to get to the bottom of Drake’s capabilities and influence.

           He’s about to swing down to the last tall building before the midrises and family homes of Robbinsville take over Gotham’s footprint when he spies a figure huddled on the rooftop.

           Had Batman been approaching from his planned route, he wouldn’t have seen the figure until he touched down on the roof – within easy knife throwing distance of the stranger, with no chance to react if an attack was imminent.

           Carefully, Batman swings around to the far side of the building and climbs silently up to roof level after landing on a balcony. He creeps close enough to ascertain that the would-be assailant is small – even with a massive jacket attempting to keep out the late January chill, the figure is miniscule… a child.

           Concern leaps, unbidden, into his chest as he wonders what could possibly bring a child onto a freezing cold rooftop in the middle of the night. The apartment building is not the lowest rent residence in the region, but it has its fair share of alcoholics and abusers. It would not be unheard of for a child to sneak away for what respite they can get and the Bat knows that this situation takes precedence to his Drake investigation.

           Batman is just about to announce his presence – From far enough away to hopefully prevent the kid from falling off the roof in fright, though he has his grapple gun ready just in case – when the kid shifts.

           An eerie blue glow lights up the crouching figure’s face as his phone flares briefly to life.

           It's Timothy Jackson Drake.

           Batman frowns, continues to silently observe.

           Drake curls more tightly around his knees. He huffs – breath turning instantly to steam that catches in the city's light – And mutters, “He should be here by now... There’s no sirens, no breakouts, nothing to keep him away… unless he’s not coming this way tonight… but he should be… he’s been moving north… but maybe I miss-counted the interval, or maybe I’m too far north… but this is the best vantage to check on Robinsv-”

           His mumbled monologue – which Batman is certain he is not intentionally speaking aloud – is interrupted by a sneeze.

           “Bless you,” Batman says, stepping from the darkest shadows.

           “Thanks,” Tim returns.

           A beat passes, and then Tim whirls around with a string of oddly pronounced Chinese curses spilling from his tongue.

           “Batman,” Tim breathes, awestruck and a little bit fearful.

           “Timothy,” Batman returns, “I hear you’ve been looking for me.”

           It’s true, the kid had just mumbled as much. There was no one else he could possibly be waiting for here, not with the details he’d murmured about having tracked to find him.

           “Um, kinda,” the kid admits.

           He’s not as surprised by Batman’s recognition of him – of the Bat using his name directly – as Batman would’ve thought. He is nervous though, antsy. Batman scans him for weapons, but nothing notable shows up in any of his cowl’s filters and the coat is too cumbersome for any shapes beneath it to be positively identified.

           Tim does have something in his hands, though – something he’s clutched close to his chest. Bare fingers glow ghostly in the night, tremble in the freezing air.

           It’s not a weapon that he’s holding, or a camera – like might be expected and acceptable from a fan. It’s a set of note cards. Note. Cards. Like he’s practicing for a speech.

           On an ice cold Gotham rooftop in the middle of the night.

           Bruce Wayne is thrown by that. Far enough to make Batman pause.

           Batman regards the kid standing before him in the darkness.

           Timothy Drake stares back.

           “Did you have a reason?” Batman asks eventually.

           “Huh?”

           “To be looking for me, did you have a reason?”

           Timothy looks down at his hands, at the half-crushed note cards he’s holding. “Yeah,” he says slowly, quiet with the kind of resignation Batman knows is guilt.

           “Well?” Batman prompts when Timothy offers nothing more.

           The kid flinches, and Batman fights a wince of his own.

           The obvious reasons Nightwing has for underestimating this kid assert themselves plainly. He is a child, small for his age and easily frightened. There seems no reason to suspect him of anything – except that he was waiting on a rooftop for Batman, intentionally. A rooftop even Batman didn’t know he would be visiting until about a week ago.

           “I’m worried about Robin,” Timothy admits. “And Nightwing, and Batgirl, for that matter, but mostly Robin.”

           “Why?”

           Another flinch. Bruce Wayne consciously tries to reel back the Batman ‘grr factor’, as Dick has termed it. And yet… Timothy clearly knows more than he should. Perhaps the gravel and growl is worth it to extract that information.

           “Because they need you to listen to them – that’s why you fought with Nightwing to begin with, right? You, um, you passed his mantle on without letting him explain why he didn’t want you to?” Tim’s actively struggling to make eye-contact.

           Batman doesn’t verbalize a response.

           He’s evaluating how this kid could possibly know what he does without knowing the names beneath the masks – it’s possible, he supposes, but extremely unlikely.

           “I get why you didn’t, he was still a kid and not very good at making his important points clear, but when he went to California, he didn’t want you to let him go, he wanted you to bring him home,” Timothy rambles, losing his battle for eye-contact.

           Batman scowls.

           Timothy swallows dryly. Consults his notes.

           “They need you to help them,” Timothy says.

           Batman’s scowl deepens, and he must make some sound because Timothy doesn’t just flinch this time, he yelps and curls into himself. His cards get squeezed so tightly they pop out of his hands and scatter across the rooftop. Timothy dives after them, but the roof is wet with the afternoon's snow shower and the antifreeze that keeps it from becoming ice.

           There is no recovering the careful presentation Timothy clearly had planned for this meeting. But Timothy isn’t willing to admit defeat immediately.

           “Timothy Jackson Drake,” Batman says as the kid in question scrambles with his wet paper, frowning at the smudged and ruined ink like he should have been able to plan for that – like he should’ve had a contingency.

           At Batman's voice saying his full name, Timothy freezes and stares up at him like a frightened deer.

           “Tell me how and why you have come to know so much about the relationships between the Gotham masks.”

           “That’s not important,” Timothy says. Quick, dismissive, like the point truly doesn’t matter in his world-view, or to his understanding of his place in it.

           “It’s not?”

           “No. What’s important is that you’re not letting them do their jobs,” Timothy accuses.

           And then he promptly freezes and stares up at Batman like he just then has realized not only what he said, but how – how direct and confrontational it was.

           “They don’t have jobs,” Batman replies, level and calm. “They are children.”

           “Not when they're wearing masks,” Timothy snaps back immediately. “When the masks are on, they’re vigilantes. Nothing else.”

           Batman narrows his eyes at Timothy's temerity.

           And fights himself to keep from agreeing with Timothy’s point. But his disagreement doesn’t make it any less true. No matter how much he wants to remember that under the masks the heroes who have joined his crusade in Gotham are children, he can’t ignore the truth of Timothy Drake's words: when the masks are on, they’re not children – They can’t be.

           Batman cannot ignore that – can’t pretend it away.

           But he can insist on one smaller truth. “They do not have jobs.”

           Timothy glared – actually glared at Batman in full cape and cowl and scowl – and said firmly, “Their job is to make sure you remember why is it that you do yours.”

           Batman blinked behind the lenses of his cowl.

           “That’s not how it works,” Batman defends. Weakly – he knows.

           But he’s not entirely sure what to do with this child, this strangely mature tiny human with hope and sweetness and innocence – and uncomfortably valid points – lecturing him like Batman is the errant child here.

           “You can’t possibly be that stupid,” Timothy says – a moment later looking wide-eyed and horrified by his words, yet still going on with speaking as if his mouth had detached itself from is brain and was running on a will of its own. “They care about what happens to you, which makes you care about it. They need you alive, and you – on some level, at least – recognize that need. It keeps you safer. And it makes you be a better person, in trying to set a good example for them to follow. And that’s important.”

           Tim pulls more air into his lungs, enough for another leg of his tirade, and goes on, “Without Robin, Batman is too violent, too aggressive… like Green Arrow starting to gain ground in Star City; you’re too much like the criminals you hunt to make a genuine, lasting difference. Without Robin, you’re just scary. Robin tempers you; makes you an inspiration – makes people believe that you aren’t just hurting bad guys, but also protecting good ones.”

           Tim manages to close his mouth and keep it shut after that – if only by the simple force of his clear mortification sealing off his words.

           “Timothy.”

           Terrified eyes peer up at Batman.

           “What do you know about us capes? There was a reason Sabini had an interest in you and I’m not convinced it was just a junkie’s word and evidence that you’re a fan,” Batman lays out simply – calmly, regaining control of this discussion.

           “I know that you’re necessary,” Tim replies in a squeak.

           Eyes narrow behind the lenses of the cowl.

           Tim ducks his head, fully aware that he has not answered Batman’s question.

           “I know that Gotham needs you,” Tim reiterates. “I don’t know who you are beneath the masks, and I don’t want to know. I just want to help you keep Gotham safe. Because I’m not a mask, I’m just a fan… but I can still help.”

           Batman regards the young civilian carefully. He has Jason’s spirit and determination, Dick’s unyielding sweetness, and Barbara’s practical acceptance of humanity’s flaws.

           “You don’t know our civilian identities?”

           Tim shakes his head. “I don’t care about them.”

           Batman does not believe him – does not believe that he doesn’t know, or that he doesn’t care. Timothy Drake knows more than enough to be dangerous.

           Dick has always been a terrible judge of character – in some ways, he always sees the best in people, in their potential – so his support of Timothy Drake as a non-threat means little.

           But Jason is the most astute observer of humanity Bruce has ever encountered – he can read a person’s entire psyche in a gesture, find their cracks and weaknesses and apply just the right leverage to break them. And he’s never thrown from thinking that a seemingly innocent person is capable of doing a great deal of damage – would never underestimate a threat like that.

           Case in point: how he hadn’t let go of the potential threat Tim posed to begin with.

           Jason had decided Tim was safe.

           Batman decides to trust his Robin’s judgement; Bruce puts faith in his son.

           Batman heaves a sigh.

           “It’s time to go home, Timothy,” he says. “This is no place for a child to be, and you shouldn’t be out at this time of night.”

           Timothy frowns.

           “It’s my city, too,” he mumbles.

           Batman takes no quarter and as soon as he gets a nod of permission – Jason’s taught him how to work with children who aren’t like Dick, with an insatiable desire for physical contact – Batman hoists Timothy up and settles him on his hip. Batman holds tight to the child and shoots his grapple gun to carry them down to street level. He sits Timothy on his motorcycle and speeds across the city to Drake’s own door.

           There is no one home.

           Concerning in a very different way.

           Batman knew the Drakes were away. Bruce didn’t realize the implications of that beyond how Timothy was left unsupervised – hadn’t until right now.

           “Do you want me to come in,” Batman asks, awkward and uncertain of whether it would help at all to walk the kid to his bedroom. Batman should not linger – should not even consider the idea of tucking this neglected child into bed – but Bruce cannot quite bear to drag himself away just yet. He needs to know that Timothy is safe.

           Timothy is staring at him like he’s shown up as Batman to a career day at school.

           “Why?”

           “No one’s home.”

           “No one’s ever home,” Timothy replied blankly, adding. “I don’t need a real babysitter, let alone Batman. But Nightwing probably needs backup.”

           Batman nodded. Accepted that he needed to push the Bruce in him down until they finished with the night’s patrol.

           Tomorrow he could look into Timothy Drake’s circumstances.

           “Be safe, Timothy,” Batman fare-wells. “Stay off the streets, and be careful, or this will not be our last conversation.

           “You be safe, too,” Timothy replies. “Or I’ll just have to find you again.”

           Batman almost chuckles. He waits until Timothy locks the door behind him, and then he takes his motorcycle back to where he’d stashed it across the bridge from Robbinsville.

           He meets up with Nightwing and finishes patrol.

           If he’s more reticent than usual Nightwing doesn’t comment.

           The teenager is still wearing the blinding goofy smile of his, broader now after a successful sweep of Coventry – no new rumors of Tim Drake. And he’d saved a cat from where it had gotten stuck on a gargoyle after it had slipped out of its apartment and ventured off an inopportune ledge beside the balcony.

           And because that’s the kind of hero Dick is, he chatters on incessantly about the cat and how it wailed and scratched him at first and yowled as he swung around the building, but then it purred and refused to let him go when it realized he’d brought it home.

           Beneath the cowl, Batman almost smiles.

           When he and Nightwing make it back to the Cave, Jason is not down there – the only evidence that anyone has been down there since he and Nightwing left is the snack left out for them by Alfred. Jason is in bed, asleep and dead to the world when Bruce slips in to check.

           Jason is safe.

           And Dick is safe.

           And Alfred and Barbara are safe.

           His family. Safe.

           And Tim is… safe enough for the moment.

           Tonight, Bruce will sleep.

           Tomorrow he will reevaluate the child and his circumstances.

           But tonight, Bruce Wayne basks in the truth that has a Family.

           And his family is home, and safe.

           It’s a foreign feeling.

           But a good one.

||  Read on Ao3 | Read on FF.net | Follow my updates on Patreon  ||

[takaraphoenix]

Hi! What are your thoughts about OUAT.

That’s a complex, layered answer because my feelings for OUaT are very complex. The short of it is that, obsession and love level wise, this was my Shadowhunters before Shadowhunters existed as a show. I completely loved and adored this show, I watched every episode as soon as it came out, with a single-minded focus (as in: normally, when watching TV, I use the show as a background noise to my writing. There is only a select handful of TV shows that ever managed to get my full, undivided attention of me turning all else off to only focus on the show).

I love OUaT to bits and pieces. However, much like Shadowhunters, it was far from a flawless show. Very, very, very far. Seriously, it’s an absolute mess in many aspects but damn do I love it.

It appeals to many of the things I love. For one, classic Disney movies. For another, fairy tales - but the very specific niche genre of fairy tale crossovers, which is just... my biggest weakness, possibly. Thirdly, characters you can get invested in and love to bits and pieces.And fourth, shipping.

This is one of the incredibly small, tiny pool of shows where I absolutely adore the canon ships, not just in a “daw it’s cute enough” way that makes me accept that it is The Canon Ship That’s Happening, but in a way that has me actively invested in and rooting for those absolute dumbasses. And. Not just one ship, usually it’s like “huh I am surprisingly invested in this one ship”, but - Rumpel/Belle, Hook/Emma, David/Snow?? Yes, please, inject it into my veins.

Though also just as attached to my non-canon ships - REGINA/EMMA FOR LIFE, Ruby/Snow, Hook/David. And that duality of being really invested in the non-canon ships but still absolutely loving the canon ships? That is... completely and entirely unique to OUaT for me. Never happened outside this show.

I adore that this show did one of the things that I complained Descendants didn’t - it respects Snow White, the very first Disney princess, and puts her front and center. Never-ever made sense to me that Descendants just went “uuuh we at random picked Belle to rule all the kingdoms because I dunno the head writer loves Beauty and the Beast the most”... Snow White was Disney’s very first and I do think she deserves more respect.

The things they did with her! They made her an actual active heroine. Not a little girl hiding out in the woods. They explored possibilities and turned her into a total badass, who never lost the main qualities of Disney’s Snow White though. Her nurturing, loving, gentle soul. That is what I adore about her, because very often when trying to portray strong female characters, media removes their softness, makes them hardened to make them a badass.

Regina and Emma have such a brilliant canon dynamic - even beyond the fanon ship. The way they mended and grew together and became friends. The growth, the softness, the shared custody. I love them.

And with both Regina and Rumpel, I love the day they gradually progressed from “main antagonist from season 1″ to “part of the family”. This show is a found family feast.

It wasn’t flawless. It had some pacing issues, in my opinion. Like the Peter Pan arc was too long. They went hiking for like 12 episodes. That one still sticks with me as having bored me. And I also do think it was a huge mistake to make Peter Pan, one of Disney’s heroes a villain. He was a great villain and his actor absolutely killed it, don’t get me wrong, but in the context of Disney canon, it was a bit jarring.

The same is to be said about Arthur. Don’t take King Arthur, of all people, and turn him into a jackass. That didn’t sit right with me and I think that could, and should, have been handled differently.

As a huge fan of Wizard of Oz canon, I have mixed feelings about Zelina. She was kind of a joke most of the time, her raping Robin was not good at all (beeecause that’s what it is when you shapeshift into the person the other one loves and then have sex with them under pretense to get yourself pregnant), but in the end it - and her - fit relatively well into all of this.

Was completely wasted for the entire Frozen arc, but even I, someone who loathes that movie with a burning passion, genuinely enjoyed the way the show was trying to fix it? Answer all the unanswered question the movie left and actually tie it into the Snow Queen fairy tale? Like, that was a feast and I love that they did that. Also Ingrid was hot and checked all my boxes so there’s that.

In the same way, I adore what they did with Ursula. That they took the scraped canon of Ursula being Triton’s sister and worked with that and that they in the end decided to redeem her too - though I am still very disappointed that we never got to see Ursula actually interact with Ariel at all. That’d have been so interesting. (Also, I admit, they went really overkill with having three Ursulas. Regina pretending to be Ursula, Ursula the ancient golden statue goddess and the actual Ursula, daughter of Poseidon).

I love Hades. I love Greg Germann’s take on Hades. He absolutely killed it. The whole underworld story was incredibly awesome to me personally - though I know others didn’t like that half-season as much. But I really dug that.

I think that it started to fizz out after that though and that after the underworld storyline, they probably should have drawn it to a close, because... after everything, after five whole seasons of watching redemption and working hard to make up for the things you did in the past, they really just decided “and now Regina is gonna physically split off her Evil Queen”... and made that Evil Queen the villain. That felt insanely repetitive of season 1 and like a set-back for Regina.

(The second half of that season didn’t go better because honestly that whole nonsense with “not only is Rumpel the son of Peter Pan, nope, now we bring in his mom the Evil Fairy”, featuring the very overused trope of “baby is magically aged up to be a character who can contribute to the plot”... Not the best.)

Also I refuse to acknowledge the existence of that reboot season. It’s bullshit is what it is. The show had the perfect ending. And then they immediately slapped a reboot onto it... why? If they had taken their time, wait ten years until nostalgia for the show kicks in and the actors all need work again, and do a proper “now Henry goes through shit”, that’d have actually been interesting, but... the moment I saw “so... we keep half the main cast, break up some OTPs, don’t age the adults up but age Henry up and also there is now a second Cinderella”, I knew that’s not gonna be good.

Seriously, the second Cinderella is what really fucked it over for me. What I loved about OUaT was that it gave very specific rules to its universe.

The Author documents the tales. The Author gives them their spin. But they are still the same tale. Be that the Brothers Grimm, who documented Cinderella, or then Walt Disney, it was still Cinderella, from the Enchanted Forest. Their stories were simply written down.

That they then, in the reboot season, went “well, actually There Are Many Cinderellas!!” completely contradicts the previously established rules of this world? Because yes, the concept very similar to Cinderella actually exists in many cultures - and that was the cool thing of OUaT’s take, because pressumably that is because the Author was in said culture at said time and documented the tale, as is the Author’s job.

Especially since it was so... unnecessary? I mean, they gave Rapunzel one half-assed episode in the past, they never tackled Gold Mary, they could have shown what became of Hänsel and Gretel now also grown up, etc. There were other unused characters that could have been brought in instead of throwing the rules out of the window.

But moving on from that; I love that they didn’t limit themselves to Disney movies - that they did prominently put Red Riding Hood (my favorite fairy tale character) in there, that they worked with mythology as well as books.

One thing they absolutely fucked up was their spin-off though. Once Upon a Time in Wonderland. They made that. They decided that, out of everything touched upon in the series, Alice’s tale should get a spin-off... and then they didn’t use any of the actual characters?

Alice herself never got an appearance in OUaT, not prior or after the spin-off (only very much later in the reboot season, with a different Alice)

They had the Queen of Hearts on OUaT, but they didn’t use her as the main antagonist, or at least a huge deal, on Wonderland

They had the freaking Mad Hatter on OUaT, but he doesn’t even have a single cameo on Wonderland

And don’t give me “Seb Stan was too busy!”, because... even then, they could have recast. The Mad Hatter is kind of a big part of Alice in Wonderland, but... they ignored the majority of what is important in AiW in general, so there is that

They named the Red Queen Anastasia and very heavily implied that yes, the Anastasia who was the stepsister of Cinderella - but when OUaT’s original Cinderella got her stepsisters introduced, they suddenly had entirely different names than the Disney stepsisters and of course it wasn’t the same actress either

They introduced Jafar (for some reason) in Wonderland. And then recast him when Aladdin was tackled on OUaT and never addressed any of the things that happened on Wonderland, especially not how Jafar was the son of the sultan which would technically make him Jasmine’s brother

It was nearly dumb to move Will Scarlet to OUaT after the spin-off was axed, because at that point they legit just ignored Wonderland as a whole so this acknowledgment felt very off. But then it’s Michael Socha and I love him so I ain’t gonna complain about that.

So yes, I have mild issues with how they made a spin-off that had basically no inpact on the show, despite many elements that should have crossed over and carried significance in both shows.

Lastly, because we’re on the topic of spin-offs, I still would absolutely kill for a spin-off about Mulan, Merida and Ruby. Those three, exploring the Enchanting Forest together, training together, being gay together, it was the best thing. Which does force me to mention the gay. Because... Mulan was canonically in love with Aurora and when they set her up to find Ruby and journey with her, it came really off as them trying to make Mulan/Ruby happen. Then they introduce Merida, a very famously single princess, and you start to wonder. But in the end, it’s Ruby who ends up with Dorothy, aka two characters not associated with Disney. And it makes you wonder. (It doesn’t. We all know Disney is hugely homophobic. We all know OUaT most likely had some Disney executive yelling at them for even implying one of their characters may be gay. So they backtracked to give the wlw storyline to two characters that weren’t Disney property.)

Ah, I don’t like ending things on a negative note so one last positive - as weirdly as the Dark Swan arc was handled at parts, I absolutely love that Emma’s name being Swan really did pay off in making her the Swan Princess in the end and giving a nudge to Swan Lake with the Dark Swan. That was such a cool pay-off of something as small as a last name.

So, to sum it up, there’s some flaws in the writing, some things I wish would have been explored more, but overall good gods do I love and adore this TV show.

[currentfandomkick]

Miraculous Team and the Batboys- Mundane Monday and Plot is Connecting Maybe

HEY so thank you all for waiting, puppy plus work being mobbed is hell, so this took forever to get brain power to write... oh well.

--

Marinette was on guard when she came into class. Her meeting of the “End Gabriel Agreste” Club with its core four members—herself, Chloe, Nino and Sabrina—went well. They were now 15% away from their goal.

Apparently Felix snatched up 3% on his own and gave it to MDC while she was away. Apparently it was his way of a peace offering… or a bribe not to kill him on sight. She wasn’t sure which… yet.

Properly awake and with her favorite drink (blend of dark roast, cream and a tiny bit of Energy Mayhem Special) she was good for the day. Everyone had their usual orders in their seats.

She raised an eyebrow when she noticed a text from Red Robin on her phone, currently a rose and bird emoji label.

RR: So, scale of one to ten, how bad is it if I accidently figured out your partner?

Marinette took a deep breath at that, checked the classroom (Nino was off with Kitty Section debating how to fix the ‘off’ bit of the rift in Rose’s latest song—something about it not ‘punching right’ and Luka being busy with his other band, Chloe and Sabrina were currently fighting Bustier in her office, Alya was conspiring with the Girl Squad on Lila’s end since she wasn’t in, Max and Kim were obviously eavesdropping on that conversation while Nathaniel was off in his own world). Damian still hadn’t come in, and Adrien wasn’t in yet… she wondered if her Chaton was going to sleep in for once.

LB: Please tell me you haven’t told your team

She kept her breathing steady, not letting panic overtake. That would alert people she didn’t want knowing, to looking, which leads to suspecting and rumors and theories and she’d like to avoid that entirely—especially since she still can’t really lie.

RR: I have a feeling you would kick us all out if I did, so I haven’t.

Marinette sighed, tension leaving her shoulders.

LB: Good. Keep it that way as long as you can, okay?

RR: They’re detectives, once they have the pieces they’ll put it together… also, why is your team so easy to figure out?

Marinette winced at that.

LB: Dumb Magic Rules.

Like the one that training a wielder young will prevent corrupting them to use it for personal gain. Like the one where a Guardian cannot be a True Guardian until they connect to the entire Box or Set of kwami. Like the one where Fu can’t give up being Guardian until she’s fully fledged… and that means until she can reclaim the Nooroo and Dusuu and heal Dusuu’s miraculous. That when she does—when she does Fu is gone.

She kept her breathing steady. nothing that they wouldn’t see as Typical Marinette Fretting Over Orders… not that they knew she had those cleared for the month.

“Good morning Dupain Cheng.”

She put her phone away easily, quick to keep up Typical Marinette (no plotting or superheroing here, just Typical Marinette, Baker’s Daughter and Keeper of Secret Drink Menu).

“Hi Damian, how was your weekend?”

“Annoying.” She winced at that. He didn’t exactly have friends here, and time differences are a horrible strain on them… Maybe Ladybug should keep an eye on him… just in case. “I hope yours was adequate.”

She was really wondering who taught him French today… he was being less him and more… stuffy than usual.

“I just needed some time away...” Honestly, she needed a lifetime away from Bustier and Hawkmoth… Lila was manageable (now).

“I am glad you were able to then.”

She was wondering where her deskmate went and why he wasn’t looking at her… Maybe she overdid it last week? She—no. She is stopping her analysis brain from going off and---

“Hello Marinette,” grinned obviously Not-Adrien. Seriously—how did they all fall for it back then? Body language, facial tics, accent—its all wrong.

She narrowed her eyes, not aware that Damian was doing the same beside her.

“Aw, didn’t you miss me?”

Nino came over then, scrunching up his nose as they both could tell Fake Adrien Agreste from the real one with ease now.

“What are you doing here,” Nino was definitely tired… He was not applying his sleep schedule quiz results at all. She was so lecturing him… lunch. She could pencil it in for lunch after wrecking Felix for taking Adrien’s place for the day.

“Oh, good to see I-Love-You Girl isn’t the only one that grew a brain since I last saw you all.” Felix raised an eyebrow at Damian, lingering. Plotting. “You’re new.”

“American Transfer, leave him out of whatever’s going on in that thing you call a brain.” Marinette was not going to deal with an akuma over this. Nope. She was not dealing with that again—or a series of Akuma… God she was going to kill Felix personally if he did. Chloe was untouchable as the Mayor’s daughter, but him? She could take him down again.

“And where’s my bro?”

“Your precious Ladybug,” He sneered, “didn’t cast whatever she did last time, and he’s home sick since his allergies are acting up. I figured it’d be as good a time as any to pull our old switcheroo to keep his Father-Farthest away.”

Marinette twitched at that. She knew she was forgetting something… She sent a quick text to Red Robin.

LB: Why didn’t you tell me it was Mr. Pigeon irl, not video!

RR: …you thought I figured it out from a video?

Marinette rolled her eyes openly at her phone, ignoring Nino as he threatened Felix with his own brand of Bro Shovel Speech.

LB: detectives, most of our battles are caught a decent amount on video, and most of Paris knows that Mr. Pigeon makes him sneeze. Really not a hard recon.

RR: I think you are overestimating my willingness to watch amateur video at length when I can outsource.

Marinette huffed at that.

LB: So you trusted them to not miss major clues when you were all working on different things and would miss key connections?

RR: we’re on the same page as a team. Plus, I get better info filtered with my apps

LB: Magic Fucks Things Up

RR: I’ve noticed.

She looked up to see Damian staring ahead, and wondered if she did something, or didn’t or—NO! Bad Marinette—no going down Rumination Ruin until its time to sleep. She needs daytime for Plotting, Nighttime for Anxiety and Regrets to run wild.

She kept her attention forward when class began, pointedly Not Talking To The Gremlin but not busting him either—she wasn’t going to get Adrien in trouble. Bustier may not notice the abuse signs, but a few other teachers had, and were given the ‘heads up’ by Nino and Chloe and Sabrina.

Lila was the only one unaware of the switch when she left during lunch to drop off a few deliveries her parents asked her to handle when the rush hit. Mostly to one elderly home, and one to her favorite Rescues Only center.

(if she was seen cooing at Lord Murder—yes she knows that’s a Bad Name but the giant kitty amputee was named that years ago before she was found and stubbornly refuses all other names. So, Lord Murder (Never Lady, she hisses at that) it was.)

She blinked when she saw Damian walk in on her checking the Lord Murder’s prosthetic.

“Hey Damian.”

“Dupain Cheng.”

Marinette nodded in acknowledgement and hoped he didn’t catch her calling Lord Murder “the lord and master of murder, the most deadly kitty in existence, and yes, clearly the most cunning of kitties to manage to scratch Mean ol’ Jean with the new paw when it doesn’t even have claws, because you are The Lord Murder, kitty of cuteness and wrath to all unwanted bath times.”

He was watching her then. “Lord likes you.”

Marinette raised an eyebrow, as yes, her favorite rescue (sorry Chat) likes her. She’s the one who argued them into letting them try out prosthetics and handled the funding (officially as MDC) and may have gone overboard on checking everything from the fits and materials and… yeah, okay, she could admit that the giant fluffy Norwegian Forest home in a millisecond if it wasn’t for the health code violation (soon… Gina mentioned she might stop renting out her old house soon as the current group was only a quick temp and she didn’t want someone else living there that wasn’t like family… and something about her Lost Son using it for the moment. Maybe she could convince Maman and Papa to let her do house sitting is she breaks out the Kitten Eyes.)

“Yes. Yes she does.”

Then Lord slow blinked at Damian. She wasn’t sure if she sould be offended or worry her favorite might be adopted by someone else, or glad that it was a serial pet adopter that actually took care of their pets and would be just as nuts as her about making sure Lord Murder was happy and healthy.

“I see she likes you too.”

She could feel Tikki dying in her bag… yes, she was being… awkward. She got it…

“Anyways, I should get going, still have a delivery to do and all so…”

She didn’t, she just really had no idea how to broach the Awkward that was Damian Greyson at the moment.

“See you tomorrow.”

That got him to pause. “Tomorrow?”

“Uh, gymnastics for the rest of the day, making up for what I missed so…”

“If you see the Other Grayson, tell him he is not to hug you.”

Marinette raised an eyebrow. “I…” Brother, father, maybe cousin or legal guardian or friend of his father’s. Too many possibilities, too much to spiral on that she can’t right now. SO.

“O. okay then.”

“Good.”

Marinette waited for him to leave the room, looking at a Too Amused Lord Murder.

“Don’t you start with me, I know I’m a mess on a good day. And no, I’m not overthinking this time Lord, I’m planning, there’s a difference… And no, its not an Alya Plot.”

Those went sideways too fast.

She left with ease and froze at the text from Red Robin.

RR: Can we meet up tonight? No traces that way.

She sent a time and place and –If no akumas happen.

--

THANK YOU ALL FOR WAITING. it has been a hellish time at work and extra shifts and war-zone lately on top of Precious Puppy Bonding and Care. As always, edits when I can get there and any comments or things you'd like to see expanded on more, leave a comment and I'll try to work it in if it flows.

As you can see, Plot Lines are converging soon.

Big Question though--what kind of Lila Exposed By Class do we want/are angling for? I can go legal or social backlash, blacklisting from Agreste brand, or some combo, or keep it a background element as I don't like how cannon Lila is written and the characters altered to make her bad lies work, so...

Other inquiry--do we want Dick to see Marinette take down someone (probably trying to rob her) on her way out of her gymnastics place on her way home using a few Obviously MIxed Gymnastics and Specific Brand of Martial Arts that feels oddly familiar to Nightwing who tells Red Robin and for him to groan as 'Coffee Angel, Why!' and then the next day its 'oh. Coffee Angel is also That Woman's Granddaughter. It all makes Sense now.' (as i hc Gina as probably busting a few drug, weapons, and human trafficking rings on occasion as how she met Jason back in the day) OR for him to only see the end as Nightwing and stare as she took them down and used her earbuds as 'makeshift handcuffs' while she's calling Sabrina as "I'm fine, no dodged their hits and yes i didn't get gassed this time... yes I'll let the medics look me over and no i'm not going to vanish before they get here unless Akuma, Yes if that happens i'll go to the hospital after--Look, i think i saw a shadow just move. I'm going on Akuma-mode now so... Thanks!" before running to meet up with Red Robin and have it take meeting Gina and looking between Gina and Marinette and how she responds to Jason trying to spar with her and then it clicks? I can go either way, but... Tim figures them out quick and straight up says at one point "I mean, Queen Bee after Style Queen, inverse colors... I've seen the multiverse, I had her pegged after seeing her in the bakery last week." All while Not Telling The Bats as Marinette's team doesn't even know and he has a feeling (correctly) she'll react Badly if she isn't the one to tell him before he comes clean, and ears her bolting as 'no support, team leader, and often absentee and likely disabled mentor, civilian life was a wreck for two years and her civilian safety net is only JUST reforming... hm. That's Famil--Oh.... well... wait until trust is there and let her move on that front, try not to set her off and offer help in what she'll allow--or risk pissing off the demi-goddess of creation and his Coffee Angel. Which he'd like to avoid, please and thank you.

Yeah, Tim is definitely going to Project on Marinette in this.

Also, I see Jason or Dick as Getting Marinette is InvolvedTM next... and Damian being the one to confirm the suspicions.

Prefer Jason Big Brothering or Dick "New Sister Mode Engaged" to suspect she's a temp hero? (Jason via Have You Seen Her in a Spar--and it's Gina's Granddaughter vs Dick 'Her Moves are Too Familiar, Maybe Ladybug uses her as a Body Double and trains her?' as the first Suspicion Arisen among the Bats.

[wordssometimesfail]

An Extremely Belated and Unasked-For Dissection of the HIMYM Finale

So, I recently hung out with a teenage cousin of mine. He told me that he had just discovered How I Met Your Mother on Netflix, and was a couple of episodes away from the series finale. Since the show’s been finished for a while and the internet fallout was so prolific, I asked him if he’d been spoiled for the ending. He said no, but then began insisting that I tell him what happens. 10-15 minutes of begging later, I finally relented and gave him a bullet-point summary of the finale. 

He burst out laughing, said I was a bad liar, and asked for the real ending. 

Instead of digging in my heels, I shrugged and told him he’d just have to watch it, so, y’know, that’ll be hilarious. But it got me thinking. 

I, like everyone else, felt so fucking betrayed by the ending of HIMYM. Because it affected me so much, in fact, I became a bit obsessed with it. I went back to the show not long after the finale aired, just to watch old episodes again. This was partially because it had been a “comfort watch” for me for so long, and partially because I felt a deep-seated need to dissect the show as a whole. 

And the thing is, if you rewatch the show with the ending in mind, it is very easy to see that they kept the ending in their heads the entire time. It’s decently, if subtly, foreshadowed. While the characters’ behaviour in the finale is frustrating, it is actually fairly consistent with their established personalities. And the misogynistic subtext of the finale was, unfortunately, a mainstay of the show long before that point. We gave C&C a lot of shit at the time for the ending coming out of nowhere, but outside of a few minor timeline/continuity issues, honestly? It didn’t. The groundwork was laid, and the clues were there all along.

So... why did it feel unearned? Why did almost no one see it coming, even avid, weekly watchers? Why does it sound so much like a bad lie? 

I think the main problem came in when the showrunners realized that they were likely not going to be cancelled until the story was done. If you look at the first 4 seasons, you can see where they left themselves lifelines to complete Ted’s story if the plug were preemptively pulled: 

Cancelled in Season 1 - Victoria becomes the Mother. Robin and Ted have feelings for one another, but because of timing and circumstance, they never pull the trigger. The audience was (presumably) rooting for them all season, so seeing them end up together years after Victoria’s death is satisfying, and feels like the resolution of years-long tension. You CAN love again after losing a beloved partner! (In hindsight, considering the ending they went with, I kinda wish the series had ended here.) 

Cancelled in Season 2 - Robin and Ted break up earlier than they do in-show. Ted meets the Mother at Marshall and Lily’s wedding, which also happens earlier than it does in-show. While in this timeline the audience HAS seen Robin & Ted as a couple and there is less UST to resolve, the toxicity of their relationship has not yet been explored, so seeing them get back together has more of a “they’re finally ready for each other” feel. 

Cancelled in Season 3 or 4 - Stella becomes the Mother. The “Shelter Island” wedding ends in a reception and a honeymoon, and the pacing is drastically altered. Again, Robin & Ted have not really relapsed in this timeline - they broke up and are both miserable about it, regretting what they did but both being too proud to admit as much, until it’s too late and Ted has fallen for someone else. The Barney/Robin hookup in S3 makes this a bit messier, but basically works. The rift caused by their hookup (+ Robin begging Ted not to marry Stella before the ceremony) kicks off the dissolution of the gang, and either...

Barney doesn’t catch feelings in this timeline and that’s the end of it.

Barney doesn’t catch feelings, but they continue a FWB relationship that eventually implodes as Robin realizes she wants what she had with Ted again, she can’t do casual anymore. 

Barney does catch feelings, but upon accepting that Robin will always be pining for someone else, “relapses” and goes for the Perfect Month. (This one works whether they do the FWB thing or not.)  

Ultimately, the tragedy of poor timing strikes again, and there is still some narrative satisfaction to the Ted/Robin endgame. 

Barney’s finale plotline (unplanned daughter changing his life) would’ve worked if the show had ended at any of these points, since Barney’s secret desire for romance & family wasn’t really explicitly explored until later. Marshall & Lily’s finale plotline (ascent into picket-fence bliss at the expense of their beloved status quo) works no matter what, mainly because that was their overarching plotline for the entire show. 

While the original ending concept was showing its wear as we approached the end of the actual S4, there was still some time to salvage it after this. The death knell came, not when Barney expressed romantic interest in Robin, but when Robin returned that interest. 

And this isn’t about to turn into a screed about how Swarkles should’ve been endgame! Upon rewatching the show, I actually like Swarkles a lot more in theory than I do in practice - the showrunners went out of their way to make the pairing seem great, but act toxic. They have FANTASTIC moments, but those moments are strung together by poor communication, self-destruction, and Robin at her most insufferable (her desperate attempts at getting Barney to like her again in the first half of S8 were... *shudders*). They, much the same as Ted and Robin, are clearly shown to Not Work. 

Even so, from the S4 finale onward, the show began to build toward Barney and Robin’s wedding, and that killed the planned ending. I say this began at the end of S4 because, as I said before, it isn’t until Robin explicitly returns Barney’s feelings that Swarkles becomes a threat to Ted/Robin - or, at least, a threat as perceived by the audience. Beyond the fact that this inadvertently turned Swarkles into a fan-favourite pairing, and was a large part of why the ending was poorly-received, it effectively changes the story. 

Before canon Robin/Barney, no one other than Ted was really presented as a viable romantic option for Robin. She wasn’t interested in getting serious with anyone else, she didn’t have that electric connection with anyone else. In S1′s “Zip, Zip, Zip”, Robin turns Barney down (despite him offering the casual, fun fling she purports to want) because she’s hung up on Ted. In S3, Robin sleeps with Barney but is uninterested in doing so again, and her attentions are quickly back on Ted (though at this point it’s more unspoken). No matter who Robin hooked up with, even when it was another principal character in the ensemble cast, the primary tension was always between her and Ted. But as soon as she develops real, romantic feelings for Barney, that tension is gone. 

And it... never really came back in the same way. 

Other than their FWB arrangement in S4′s “Benefits” and a couple of near-misses later, Robin and Ted are not involved again until the end of the series. In fact, in “Benefits”, neither Ted nor Robin are interested in taking their relapse further - they only want casual sex, and are so romantically disinterested in one another that Ted ends the arrangement for Barney’s sake in the same goddamn episode. Though Ted does express that he still has feelings for Robin as early as S5, at no point does she reciprocate in any meaningful way. All of the romantic tension between them after the fact is one-sided. Robin is no longer romantically interested in Ted by approximately the midpoint of Season 4, her attentions are firmly on Barney (and later, other serious romantic interests) by the end of Season 4, and she isn’t interested in Ted again until the final episodes of the show. 

The problem here isn’t that Robin had other serious romantic relationships, but that Ted was no longer a serious option in her mind for so much of the show’s run. Starting in S6, the wedding build starts in earnest, meaning that for four whole seasons (S6, S7, S8, and S9), the audience knows that someone is getting married. We’re told that Ted meets the Mother at the wedding, so there’s Zero chance of any of his relationships working out during that 4-season period - the tension is gone from his love-life, because we know that we’re waiting and we know what we’re waiting for. Suddenly, Robin and Barney are the center of the romantic tension of the show, and... Robin hasn’t been interested in Ted for a year. She and Barney are involved in a love quadrangle plot of which Ted is only an observer. By the time it’s confirmed, it’s painfully obvious that Robin is the bride at the foretold wedding, even with Barney’s red-herring girlfriends tossed in the mix. We spend all of Season 8 building up to the wedding. We spend all of Season 9 on the wedding weekend. Barney and Robin actually address the more toxic aspects of their relationship, and resolve to work on them (something Ted and Robin never actually did). We meet the Mother, and spend a season gleefully building up to the Mother meeting Ted. 

Remind me... why are we supposed to want Ted and Robin to get together in the end? 

There are other issues with the finale that bother me, but are not the focus of this rant as I don’t think they’re the Biggest Problem:  

The gang was always going to drift apart, but they seem to stay in frequent contact with one another in flash-forwards that we see earlier in the show. This is... not super supported by the finale. (Ex. If [roughly] kindergarten-age Luke and Penny drew pictures of times they hung out with Aunt Robin, why does the finale imply they barely got to know her until after their mother passed?)  

We knew for several seasons that Barney DID want a wife & kids, he was just afraid to admit it or pursue it because he thought he was too far gone. Yet we’re supposed to believe that his “relapse” after his breakup with Robin was him going back to the “real Barney”, and that despite having had 3 meaningful, serious romantic relationships throughout the series, one of which led to a marriage, he could not be arsed to so much as learn the name of the mother of his child. Despite getting 4 seasons of significant character development re: vulnerability, love, and relationships, he is supposed to have learned nothing, and changed not a whit. (NPH’s stance on this, that you may “want” Barney to change but some people don’t change, is... lame, imho, since we didn’t just want Barney to change, we were told and shown that he was actively changing, even if he wasn’t fully there yet.) 

On that same note, the fact that Barney didn’t “really” change until his daughter was born implies that things might’ve worked out with Robin if she’d been able to bear him children. Also, implies that his speech to his mom about how Robin means more to him than the possibility of having children was insincere or at least misguided. Gross. 

We all know about the Mother = Uterus shit, and while I don’t necessarily dislike the idea of the Mother having been dead all along, the idea that Ted and Robin couldn’t be happy together either until some other woman bore Ted’s children is also gross. 

In general, super sexist, and it’s not a twist when you directly contradict what you have told/shown your audience. It’s bad writing. 

But with all that said, if the show had ended somewhere between Seasons 1-4 (with minor to major tweaks - *reluctantly salutes*), the planned ending would have been fine. At least, it would’ve been fine with regard to Ted/Robin (and Barney’s character). The tension between them was still there, they still had audience support, and it made sense that, after all that buildup, Ted’s kids would be hoping for some closure to his tumultuous relationship with their Aunt. The problem is that, in the show as written... Ted and Robin do get closure. Ted, just like Tracy, is able to let go of the love that has consumed him and arrested his romantic development for so long, and that is what finally opens him up to meeting the love of his life. His relationship with Robin, even the unrequited mess it became later, not only led him to the Mother, it made him ready for the Mother. When he shuts Robin down in the penultimate episode of the show, Ted closes the door on that chapter of his life. That’s the closure. That’s the resolution of the Ted/Robin tension.  

And that’s a huge part of why the ending feels flaccid. They attempt to resurrect a dynamic that no longer holds any narrative weight - Robin pining after Ted in a happy relationship, lamenting what she’s lost, is not only something that we’ve seen before, it’s something we’ve seen Robin get over before. She didn’t realize “too late” what she had with Ted, or what she could have had. She had it, lost it, mourned it... then decided she didn’t want or need it again, and found something new with someone else. They wanted to throw the audience off the scent, but by killing all the tension between their endgame couple, and spending literal years building up relationships between other characters, they destroyed any momentum that that storyline had in the first place. They told a will-they/won’t-they story, and while there were moments where they subtly hinted that “they will”, more than half their text was dedicated to showing their audience, “no they won’t”. 

In the Season 2 episode “Something Blue”, Barney hears that Ted and Robin have something to tell everyone. When he begs them to tell him, they give him a story piece by piece detailing what happened. With each part of the story he gets, Barney guesses how it ends. Every time he guesses, Ted smiles wryly and tells him, “the story’s not over”. This implies to Barney and the audience that each of Barney’s guesses is wrong, because he doesn’t have all the information yet. 

Except... Barney does correctly guess the end of the story. He guesses that Ted and Robin broke up, Ted smiles wryly, says “the story’s not over”, and proceeds to continue to tell it, only for the story to, in fact, end with his and Robin’s breakup. 

This plot is emblematic of the problem with the end of How I Met Your Mother. One of the biggest running themes of the show is that until a story is over, you can’t turn it into a narrative. You don’t have the full picture, you don’t know who the bad or good guy is, you don’t know what story you’re living. Barney doesn’t know what story he’s being told until it’s over - except he does. And because Ted isn’t finished telling the whole story, he implies to Barney that he’s wrong. He throws him off, so he can end the story on his own terms. That’s what the showrunners of HIMYM did, too. They wanted so badly to tell the story as they conceived it, but in order to keep that ending as a twist, they couldn’t telegraph it too obviously. This, to them, meant throwing the audience so far off the scent of their plan that they obscured their plan, that they deflated the central narrative, made it look like there was no way it would happen, because we were being made to look in another direction. No, we clearly didn’t have the whole story. But we had the story that was unfolding before us, one where Robin didn’t want Ted romantically anymore, one where Barney was trying so, so hard to be better, one where Ted needed to let go in order to be happy. And that story doesn’t feel complete when it ends the way that it does, because the ending we got is the end of the story we saw in Season 1. 

The story we saw in Season 1 was of a man who hopelessly pined after a woman who loved him back, but wasn’t in a place to reciprocate the way he wanted. Years later, they reconnect and are finally able to make it work. That’s the story that HIMYM thought they were telling. But, because they never got cancelled and got free reign to tell this story for as long as they wanted, and because they didn’t want us to guess that darn twist, they gave us a whole whack of misdirections, plot threads, and character growth that ultimately gets nullified to make way for the ending of the “real” story. There is no momentum carrying us to the finale as planned, because the finale as planned was meant to be the ending to a much shorter tale. 

Everything else was just filler. 

[bigskydreaming]

Okay so I freely admit this is way long even by my standards, lol, but like, obviously I didn’t have a ton of time to like...think about superhero stuff, lmao, but that didn’t mean I didn’t still have Very Important Thoughts, so I kept adding them throughout the week and then I woke up and was like oh hey, actually this is done. And also, oh hey, that shit added up fast. Whoops. C’est la vie. Such is me.

ANYWAY. Here. I give you a Mega Meta. A Master Meta. A...shut up, me.

Okay. So. 

Thing is, to be perfectly clear....the problem many of us have is not with people writing Dick getting angry. Nobody’s saying he never gets angry, nobody’s saying you should never write him losing his temper.

The problem lies in so rarely writing Dick’s anger as sympathetic. 

Meanwhile, you have Jason punching him left and right in fics without ever apologizing or with readers even expecting him to or saying he should...because he has issues. Hell, almost every fic I can think of off the top of my head where Jason punches Dick for some reason, even when Dick didn’t actually do anything wrong or Jason jumped to conclusions...Dick ends up apologizing to him, more often than the other way around. He sheepishly volunteers that he probably deserved it. That’s. That’s not good, guys. And then we have Tim holding a grudge for years and finally erupting at Dick, with people cheering in the comments, validating it, validating Tim. 

Or we have Bruce being cold and dismissive in order to protect himself and his own feelings, but that’s just Bruce, people say, sighing as if exasperated with the character for doing the things that he only does because he’s written doing them. Because people have long since accepted seeing Bruce engaging in this kind of behavior with his kids, and more often that not...again, with Bruce they validate this behavior instead of calling it a flaw that needs fixing or needs spotlights shone on it. They don’t condone it, necessarily, but they accept that its just who he is, that its integral to him, that to change that would be to fundamentally change him, and thus, its not even so much a flaw at this point as just a fundamental touchstone of his character. That’s just how he is.

So again...its not that we think its out of character to write Dick being angry or losing his temper or yelling at someone. Its that his anger is almost universally treated as a flaw, specifically, instead of ever being framed as a merited reaction to something fucked up.

Whereas everybody else consistently has extenuating circumstances or explanations or justifications or bigger issues or whatever, any time they lose their temper in fics. When Jason, Tim, Bruce, Babs, Steph laying into Dick because he did this or that or didn’t do this or that, all of this is fine with everyone in the comments, its deserved, oh sure it sucks that the other characters had to be so blunt but the truth bombs needed to be dropped about Dick’s bad behavior or whatever, etc, etc....

But turn back to the vast majority of fics that make a point to write Dick getting angry or losing his cool at someone...and Dick’s anger at a friend of member of his family, by comparison, is practically never upheld as justifiable, understandable, sympathetic. Instead its more commonly framed within the narrative and agreed with in the comments, that it was simply him being selfish or self-centered, inconsiderate or spoiled or short-sighted or hypocritical.

Disregarding stories where Dick has no real storyline of his own, the ones where he’s there to support and further the plots and emotional arcs of his family....that aside from those, in stories or even just in scenes where Dick takes center stage, where he and his conflicts are front and center.....

Is it wildly inaccurate to say that except for fics that are clearly written by authors who are Dick stans first and foremost, that in a sizable majority of other fics, just about the only time you will see Dick portrayed as truly sympathetic....is when he’s inarguably a victim, specifically spelled out and acknowledged as such by the other characters themselves? In Tarantula or Mirage fics, injury or illness fics or ones where he’s been tortured, Court of Owl fics or ones where he’s been targeted by Deathstroke or adapts the Apprentice arc from TT...

That the only time a large part of fandom actually sympathizes with Dick, is when the narrative clearly and undeniably centers him as a victim in need of comfort and support, almost always from some external threat outside the family (with the exception of Bad Dad Bruce Wayne fics as well, to be fair).

Whump fics or when he’s being tortured or is sick or injured....often specifically scenarios in which he has very little agency of his own and his siblings and/or Bruce are stepping up to protect him. Which in theory is great. But in reality, it highlights the fact that the only time Dick securely has readers’ sympathy, is when everyone or most everyone in the fic has already offered it to him first.

Any other time though? Dick’s reactions to things are hardly ever framed as sympathetic, understandable. Not when the conflict is with other main characters. He’s always too extreme, too over the top, too heedless of how his words and actions affect others. He’s always described in comments in ways like “I understand Dick being upset here, but he went way too far” and even when he did absolutely nothing to incite a conflict and merely reacted to what other people did first, somehow it ends up being “well both of them are in the wrong, if Dick would just stop fighting”....again...even when he was the one in the conflict who undeniably had less agency, less power, less initiative, and thus him ‘stopping the fight’ is actually more accurately described as letting whatever was done go, so they can all make nice, even though he’s the only one who actually has to compromise.

In comparison, would Jason fans be comfortable with the argument that if Jason would simply stop fighting with Bruce, he could come home and they’d all get along fine? Would Tim fans be comfortable with the stance that if Tim would simply come back to Gotham during the events of Red Robin and make peace with Dick, they could be a united front and be all the stronger for it?

Or would the response to those takes be hell no, because Jason is RIGHT to stand by his convictions, to stand up for himself against Bruce? That Tim is RIGHT to stay absent from Gotham and keep ignoring Dick’s attempts to reach out to him, because anything else would just be letting Dick off the hook and he doesn’t deserve to have it that easy after what he did?

Meanwhile.....even in narratives where the take being used is that Bruce unequivocally fired Dick, forbid him from being Robin...its Dick who’s being stubborn and selfish for not forgiving Bruce, even though Bruce hasn’t actually put forth any actual effort to apologize or acknowledge what he did to hurt Dick or ask how he could make it better. 

Because also, the other factor in all this...Dick’s never just allowed to exist for himself. Because there’s always someone else who needs him, who by extension is being hurt and neglected by Dick’s focus on his own conflict and holding out for the conclusion to it that he secretly hopes for, the one where the other person apologizes and puts effort into fixing things. With it thus being deemed that the longer Dick’s conflict with someone else lasts, and keeps him from helping whomever else needs his attention, the more Dick is actually the one hurting that other person, by refusing to simply cave and settle and let go of his hurt. 

And when his conflict is with Bruce, notorious for never budging on things, the implicit understanding is Bruce is never going to be the one to cave, so Dick is never going to get the resolution he really wants, and thus trying to insist on it anyway, at the expense of not focusing his attention on that third party and prioritizing their needs....well, this, ultimately, becomes viewed as Dick being selfish. Because he’s insisting on holding out for something nobody believes will actually happen, and thus he’s just being stubborn and heedless of how his stubbornness is impacting others. 

So even when Bruce was the instigator of a conflict, when Dick was staying away with reason, because he was hurt, because he shouldn’t have to be the one to make things right......

Suddenly, the frame shifts, in ways it never does with other characters. Well, forget about Bruce for a second, readers argue. Because Dick’s still being selfish, see, because what about Jason? Maybe the fight was Bruce’s fault, maybe he did do something wrong, but Dick was still wrong for not putting Jason first, centering him, even though at the time Dick was a nineteen, twenty year old with his own life to live and no actual obligation to the boy his father figure took in all while making no effort to repair the damage he’d caused in his relationship with Dick. Instead just dedicating himself to being ideal for Jason, who got the adoption Dick had long wanted, the name and mantle that he created and Bruce treated like it was his to give and take...

No, none of that was ever Jason’s fault, and he definitely shouldn’t have been targeted or penalized by Dick for any of that. But the thing is, he wasn’t. All that is wholly a fanon creation. While meanwhile, by the same token, it was never Dick’s responsibility to buck up and get over his own hurt for the sake of someone who was at the time a complete stranger to him and who had no real connection to him yet, because it was Bruce’s responsibility to make a case for that connection existing. Because Bruce was the only connection between them at that point. Bruce was the reason there was any possible tie between Dick and Jason at all....but at the same time, Bruce was also the reason for Dick’s unwillingness to simply return to Gotham and play one big happy family. Because Bruce had fucked up, Bruce had overstepped and hurt him, but showed no willingness to actually take responsibility for that, and take any actual steps to fix what had been broken by his own actions and stubbornness. 

I mean, when Bruce took Jason in...Dick literally had NO ties left to Bruce at that point. His wardship dissolved at eighteen, Bruce held no legal responsibilities towards him, nor legally established bonds...Dick wasn’t living at the Manor anymore, hadn’t in a long time. He lived with the Titans, his teammates that Bruce had never truly approved of...as far as he could tell, he had no real presence in Bruce’s life anymore....and then Bruce takes in this new kid, adopts him, full legal ties for life, no aging out at eighteen...makes him Robin, gives away Dick’s mantle that he took from Dick in the first place when it was never his right to do so...fire him as his partner sure, but take away the mantle, specifically? No.

So here’s Dick, having gotten reluctantly used to Bruce, his father figure, being pretty much a non-entity in his life by this point...and then Bruce goes and gives every possible sign of recognition and family and WANT to this new kid...thereby establishing that he wasn’t just emotionally incapable of making those declarations, he wasn’t just utterly unwilling to ink permanent, undeniable bonds of family because of his own issues surrounding his parents’ death....

He just, for reasons born of thought processes Dick wasn’t privy to due to Bruce making no effort to contact him since their fight either...as far as Dick could tell, he just showed no interest in putting forth any kind of similar effort in Dick’s direction. In reconnecting with Dick, or establishing in the kinds of ways he’d quickly volunteered to establish with this shiny new kid, that he did in fact still want Dick in his life, in his family. That no matter the current lack of legal ties between them, he wanted to say or indicate otherwise now, change that, the way he had with Jason. To make clear that even though he was no longer obligated to Dick in any way, bound to him, he still wanted to be.

And I mean, its not like its impossible to see or consider Bruce’s headspace at the time. I believe in all likelihood, Bruce’s unwillingness or hesitation to reach out to Dick and try and rebuild their relationship was essentially just a fear of rejection. That he was afraid he could give it his all, dedicate everything to trying to fix what he’d fucked up...but Dick would reject it, reject him, and say it wasn’t good enough, or it was too late...because that was Bruce’s own assessment of things. That deep down, he didn’t believe Dick would be willing to work things out, to try, that he would ever truly forgive him, because Bruce didn’t believe he SHOULD be forgiven. 

I think Bruce absolutely came to regret everything he’d said and done, and realized too late just how badly he’d hurt Dick....and while I’m never shy about expressing I believe Bruce has major entitlement issues...his guilt complex is equally vast. I do think that often times Bruce’s refusal to apologize or express remorse is a stubborn insistence that he made the right choice or that at the time, his choice was valid...but I also think that just as often, Bruce’s unwillingness to apologize for hurt he caused a loved one comes from the sheer depth of his guilt, and the self-loathing that accompanies his awareness of the hurt he himself caused. He doesn’t apologize not because he isn’t sorry, but because he believes no apology could ever be good enough to make it right, that he could never truly be forgiven because what he did didn’t deserve forgiveness. And in the process, he so often makes that lack of forgiveness a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Because understanding that headspace of course does not actually absolve Bruce of anything. His feelings of remorse mean jack shit if he kept them bottled up inside instead of ever expressing them to Dick, the person who needed to see them, who needed a reason to believe Bruce knew how he’d hurt him and was sorry and wanted a chance to rebuild a relationship and vow to never repeat the same mistake. All the guilt, self-loathing and remorse in the world, if not turned into actual words or actions...does nothing to move the needle on the responsibility that was still Bruce and Bruce’s alone, to account for his own actions, his own choices, that affected both Dick and Jason in ways they had no equivalent power to re-order everyone’s lives with their own choices, as Bruce’s heavy handed edicts resulted in.

And yet...people constantly insist that Dick was selfish back then for not stepping up and doing MORE than he already did with Jason, because he was mad at Bruce....as though it was some silly little spat he should have long since gotten over, rather than because the heart of the entire issue lay in Bruce’s ability to demonstrate he could still be for Jason the kind of father he once was for Dick....but had seemingly decided to just abandon all effort to reach out and try and rebuild the connection with Dick that he was at the very same time quite happy to build with Jason.

So even when its all but impossible to frame a specific conflict between Dick and someone else as being Dick’s fault....people simply shift the ENTIRE CONFLICT to a new angle wherein Dick is still managing to be selfish, for not adequately performing the role and tasks their father should be taking it upon himself to do....since ALL OF THIS, his fight with Dick, his willingness to let their estrangement last as long as it did with no effort to even ask Dick to come home, to express that he wanted Dick to...and then his taking in Jason, adopting him, making him Robin...

EVERY SINGLE CHOICE IN ALL OF THAT WAS BRUCE’S. THE POWER, THE AGENCY, THE DECISION MAKING, THE CAUSES THAT RESULTED IN EFFECTS...THEY WERE ALL BRUCE’S AND NO ONE ELSE’S.

And yet somehow, Dick gets stuck with half the blame, half the responsibility. All while skipping straight over his own hurt and the repercussions of him being the one most directly and negatively impacted by Bruce’s choices and their inevitable ripple effect on his life. Disregarding the fact that he was FAR more wounded by his conflict with Bruce than Jason was by proximity to said conflict...and instead refocusing all that sympathy straight on Jason, for being the target of Dick’s resentment at being replaced. An angle that had to be wholly created by fanon in the first place, since that wasn’t how Dick actually treated him in canon. 

Dick gets cut entirely out of the middle in order to allow most reader sympathy to miss him completely...and somehow at the same time he gets pasted back into the frame parallel to Bruce, where he’s thus regarded as equally at fault, equally stubborn. Yet the reality remains that at no point did Dick ever have equal the power Bruce had when unilaterally making the choices that affected both Dick and Jason. Dick’s only real power lay in whether or not he settled for burying his grievances without any actual apology from Bruce, or an attempt by Bruce to take the initiative in repairing their relationship. 

People levy undeserved responsibility onto Dick’s shoulders in all of that, most likely to make up for the parts of all that mess that Bruce wouldn’t take responsibility for, not out loud. Because people just take it for granted that well, its Bruce, that’s who he is, that’s not going to change...so since we don’t expect him to do everything that needs to be done, we put that on Dick instead, because he’s more likely to take on more responsibility than should be his in the first place. He’s that kind of character. 

Its just easier to keep heaping narrative and emotional responsibilities on the character who’s established as being willing to keep taking on that responsibility, no matter how much you add and how much it isn’t his...than it is to do the legwork of trying to measurably change the character who’s established as being most stubborn about resisting change.

And so Dick keeps over and over getting backed into a corner where the only choices are take responsibility for the very actions someone else did to hurt him, or be the scapegoat for everything that continues to go wrong anyway. Because he makes for an easier target to blame than Bruce, who its deemed pointless to try and get to do anything he’s not already willing to do.

And that pattern repeats, across the board, with pretty much everyone. Its always a one-way street when its Dick’s actions or words that have hurt one of his siblings or Bruce. The responsibility for their conflict is ultimately his and his alone, and there’s never any excuse for what he did or how it hurt someone, never any mitigating circumstances. But each and every time the narrative presents a situation where someone in the family did something that hurt Dick, upset him, made him angry, made him leave....suddenly, it somehow always in those cases manages to be a two way street. Well technically both were at fault, or there’s two sides to every story, etc.

In fics, whenever the family is mostly in harmony or being brought together by some tragedy...Dick’s often cited as the emotional glue that holds the family together, the heart of it....but the second conflict erupts between him and one of his siblings, its equally cited that for some reason, the family’s emotional glue just can’t seem to stop himself from fucking up with one of his siblings, mistreating them, misjudging them, misunderstanding them....in ways that nobody else is guilty of. Its just him, the lone holdout that’s causing friction. From emotional glue of the family to the only one who can’t seem to get on board with what everyone else is perfectly fine with....in two scenes or less.

Which brings me to my ultimate point:

The only times Dick’s anger is considered justified, when its validated and approved of by writers and readers, is when that anger is on behalf of someone else. Then he’s allowed to be as cruel and cutting and as vicious as possible, and readers celebrate it.

Meanwhile, like I said earlier, Dick is only deemed truly sympathetic when he’s hurt and traumatized and shaking…then he can receive soft words of comfort, expressions of sympathy and support, and ‘aww, poor Dick’ in the comments. But anything else, lashing out because of his trauma, and he’s being selfish and not considering the effects he’s having on others (again, I point you back to how many times Jason hits Dick in fics with it not even getting a shout out in the comments).

Should he get angry on his own behalf and express resentment and bitterness towards his own family’s treatment of him at times, then he’s being cruel and inconsiderate of their own circumstances, his response is disproportionate or somehow just happens to cross the line up til which readers were willing to see his side of things, and shifts them firmly ‘back’ in the other person’s camp (again, I point you back to how many times Tim is celebrated for lashing out with years of pent up resentment at Dick, or even cutting him out of his life entirely. With readers cheering Tim on and saying Dick deserved it to degrees I have never seen readers validate or vindicate any amount of hurt or resentment Dick has towards Bruce’s firing of him as Robin).

It all adds up to creating this trap where he can be angry for others, but never himself. He can be sympathetic, but only to a point, and only if it costs no other main characters anything. He can be a victim, but not one with agency, not one with a full spectrum of emotions and reactions that might potentially be upsetting to others. And he can be an antagonistic foil or aggressor, but never one with understandable cause or justification behind his actions, unlike Bruce, Jason or Tim for whom there’s always a reason underlying why they do or say the things they do or say to Dick in canon or fics. Its complicated and they’re only human after all. Dick however, is pretty much always cast as just being unreasonable, hypocritical, spoiled and stubborn or all of the above.

Fandom has gradually over time eroded Dick down to only his opposite extremes, allowing no room for nuance or shades of gray in anything he says or does in canon OR in fiction. Its either or. He’s the most perfect or he’s the most flawed. He’s the solution to the story’s problem, his family’s problem, or else he is the story’s problem, he is the one causing the family conflict. He’s the best brother anyone could want or he’s the worst brother for anyone to be stuck with. He’s a supportive, everpresent son or he’s a resentful, absentee son. He’s eternally pining for Kory, Babs, Roy or Wally, or he’s flighty and promiscuous and with a sexual history longer than Deathstroke’s body count. He’s a helpless victim with too much trauma to act on his own agency or he has no trauma period, and thus no understanding of anyone else’s. He misses his parents too much to ever truly want or think of Bruce as his dad, or he never thinks of them or references them at all. He’s so perfect he exists as an unreachable benchmark that everyone resents him for being, or he’s not really that smart or talented beyond his acrobatics and only significant because he came first, with the others all having long surpassed him in skills and intellect. He has platonic, romantic or sexual relationships with practically every mercenary and antihero in the DC universe, or he has no flexibility whatsoever on his moral stances and is completely incapable of seeing the POV of even his own siblings when they disagree on these matters.

And any and all attempts to paint within these polarizing opposite extremes, to fill in the in betweens with shades and nuances…results in these things almost universally being deemed ‘Flaws’.

Any time he gets angry on his own behalf, so much as raises his voice at a member of his family or someone he’s in a relationship with, even if its only as a response to something they did to hurt him, a fight they initiated and pulled no punches in…this isn’t him being angry, experiencing a normal human emotion characteristic of every character at one point or another…this is his temper on display, we’re told, and this is a Flaw.

The fights always end with him having the last word, the parting shot, because he’s just that stubborn. And by total coincidence, this means the takeaway from all fights he’s in is always that he’s the one who refuses to finish...what he usually never wanted to begin in the first place.

And the thing is...Bruce is infamously angry as well of course, as is Jason, as are many, many others within and outside of the Batclan. But you see, its different with them, because they use their anger, they make a tool of it, it fuels their fights for others, it drives them forward even when they’re frustrated with how much is stacked against them or how unreasoning their opponent is being. They’re angry, yes, but their anger has purpose, their anger accomplishes things. Their anger is another tool in their utility belts. Their anger helps.

Dick’s anger, however, being a Flaw (with the exception of when its ignited in protection of his family), is pretty much at all other times a hindrance. His anger is unreasoning. It’s blind passion. It clouds his judgment and makes him behave irrationally. It can’t be harnessed, its too primal for even him to ever consciously control or put a leash on, and thus it is in all instances dangerous. It is destructive to both himself and those around him; once ignited, it will consume anything in its path, regardless of who or what it comes across. It puts up obstacles between him and the people who love him and just want to help him and be with him but he won’t let them, he and his anger and his stubborn refusal to see past it just keeps wedges between them for years, until someone smacks some sense into him. 

(Curiously, every extended canon conflict I can think of between him and Bruce or him and someone else…almost always seems to end with him being the one to come back, reach out, extend the olive branch, etc.)

Similarly, any time he prioritizes himself or his own circumstances over what a member of his family wants him or needs him to do or be…this isn’t an understandable conflict born of the fact that even in co-dependent families, siblings still have a right and a need to live their own lives, and its unrealistic to expect one to eternally put their own life on pause to settle everyone else’s emotional conflicts or needs….this is him being selfish and inconsiderate, we’re told, and this is a Flaw.

I mean, you get what I’m saying, right? Its not that Dick is a flat, two dimensional character who needs flaws to make him more interesting. Its that Dick is a fully three dimensional character the same as everyone else, but people keep calling anything except his most two dimensional characterizations a Flaw, and then they just point to his two dimensional characterizations as proof that he’s boring without these things….

Even though nobody’s disagreeing with that, we’re just disagreeing that all these other things that keep being called flaws are actually flaws! As opposed to just human, three dimensional characteristics that are repeatedly hammered down to their most flat and singular presentation before having a spotlight shone on them and captioned as an eleventh hour addition intended to give depth to his character...

When ironically, these flaws that are supposedly highlighted in order to flesh him out, make him more realistic, human, relatable...are almost always presented in a very shallow way themselves, with very little depth or context to them or Dick’s expression of them, usually intended to only be interpreted in very specific ways. 

You want him to be fully fleshed out and three dimensional, not static or unchanging or too unrealistically perfect? You want him to be like every other character?

Well…he already is. All those nuances that are so detectable in everyone else are already there in his core characterization, his canon. Nobody needs to add anything to make him compelling, to make him a partner in a narrative rather than an obstacle to be overcome…because the problem is not with Dick or his characterizations or his emotions, not really.

Its how everyone around him is written reacting to those things, or not reacting, as the case may be. Its this bizarre form of fictional gaslighting where people look at a chapter where Bruce instigated a conflict by bulldozing over everything Dick expressed he wanted or felt, and just issued an edict that Dick objected to…and people somehow come to the conclusion that well, if Dick didn’t want to fight with Bruce, he should simply have not objected to Bruce overriding his wants or needs, or at least gotten over it after a week or two. Hence, really, the fault is Dick’s.

Its Dick having trouble interacting with Jason when he first finally starts trying to reconcile with the family, with Dick written being cautious and wary and watching Jason like a hawk when the readers all know that Jason is trying here, he’s doing his best, he’s changed, why can’t Dick see that, why is he still hung up on….those times Jason almost killed their other brothers. Its like, why is he keeping distance between him and his brother…because of his narratively stated concerns for his other brothers, that are born of that first brother’s canon actions (and referenced within the fic itself) that hurt them. He’s vilified for not caring about his brother…when his caution and distance is literally born of caring about his brothers. Instead of garnering reader sympathy for being thrust in between a rock and a hard place while he works his way towards trusting that maybe nobody is going to hurt each other again and this could actually end well for all of them....he’s condemned for not reaching that point fast enough. 

For having to work his way there at all instead of instantly intuiting that Jason has changed and Dick can trust their brothers’ safety around him now...even though had he encountered Jason right before Jason started enacting his big plan in UTRH and welcomed Jason home with open arms and brought him straight to the manor and vouched for him because he wanted to believe this was a happy ending for all of them...at that point in time Tim very well might not have  been safe at the manor with Jason, and that could have ended horribly, and how could Dick possibly be expected to just know that Jason had truly changed and something like that was not a possibility at all...without the benefit of reader POVs or without being allowed the time to get to know Jason as he was now, rebuild trust that even if it primarily had been broken by external factors like the traumas that so drastically changed Jason or the effects of the Pit on him...that didn’t mean that even without assigning blame, there was still trust that need to be rebuilt, or built again. On all sides.

But meanwhile, Jason’s inciting actions contributed nothing to this conflict, because he had context for his actions...context that is rendered sympathetically by most narratives, and he’s past all that now and changed. So really, as far as most readers are concerned, the problem that needs to be fixed in this story is getting Dick to pull his head out of his ass and figure out what everyone else already knows, that he should somehow be able to just….sense Jason’s new trustworthiness. That Dick’s flawed for not accepting it at face value because of previous interactions, and being stubborn and judgmental in insisting on proceeding with caution at first instead.

You really want Dick to be three dimensional? He doesn’t need you to add anything to his character to put him on an even playing field with everyone else, or emphasize specific flaws in order to bring him down to anyone’s level.

It literally just requires…treating his character the same way you treat every other main character within a narrative.

Like…just let him be angry for himself at times, without painting him as the worst ever for daring to do so. Like everyone else gets to be, such as when they’re mad at him instead.

Let him put himself first at times without calling him neglectful for not constantly being at his brothers’ beck and call, like everyone else gets to be when they go off and have their own stories and adventures and no one calls them while they’re in Europe and says hey you need to come home and play mediator between Bruce and Damian, or Damian and Tim, or Jason and Bruce.

Let him need time alone not because he’s flighty or flaky or has commitment issues but because he has things he needs to sort out in his own head and that’s impossible to do when he keeps getting pulled in to everyone else’s fights to play peacemaker or expected to take sides.

Let him have inconsistent views on things like killing not because he’s a hypocrite, but because peoples’ views on charged matters can and do change over time, or they take into context specific situations they hadn’t previously considered, or they’re applied differently to other people who have other motivations than this previous instance he expressed a different stance on.

Let him have issues with how Bruce raised him, not because he’s ungrateful or inconsiderate, but because Bruce has trouble expressing how he truly feels about things a lot of times and Dick is someone who happens to really need actual open affection or else doubts start to creep in when he’s forced to rely on reading between the lines. Let this actually be acknowledged as part of the conflict between them, instead of offhandedly mentioned in passing before all focus is honed in specifically on Dick and his ‘part’ of the conflict.

Let him retain his own identity outside of Bruce taking him in, instead of acting like the second he moved into the manor, he became more of a spoiled rich kid than even Bruce is ever accused of having been. As if his identity in his eyes, the whole time he grew up with Bruce, wasn’t far more that of Robin, Batman’s partner, than it ever was of Bruce Wayne’s Ward, the newest Prince of Gotham. Y’know, like how Bruce taking Jason in didn’t magically turn him into an upper class snob, or Damian coming to live with Bruce didn’t magically make him the same as all his peers instead of constantly at odds with them because of his different childhood and how it shaped him in very different ways than theirs did.

Let him constantly hug and touch people and initiate bodily contact with people not because he’s inconsiderate or unaware of boundaries, but instead keeping in sight his own history of being touched without inviting it, and of having things assumed and insinuated about him by virtue of his heritage or simply from being taken in by a bachelor. And thus exploring how perhaps him so often taking the initiative in making or at least offering bodily contact first, lets him set the tone and degree of that contact rather than ever leave him caught unawares. A defense mechanism against people initiating unexpected or unwanted bodily contact with him - if he does it first, and on his terms, then he can never be surprised or disturbed by it, the way he’s so often been subjected to in canon and fics.

Let his family come to HIM sometimes, rather than just waiting for him to always come to them and saying well that’s just how he is. Instead of ever considering maybe that’s just how they’ve always made it be and he never was actually given a whole lot of choice in the matter…it was either accept the status quo or be deemed stubborn and neglectful for refusing to always come when called. Or labeled petty for pointing out that they could just as easily come to him when seeking his help. Or, y’know. Just to drop in and say hi or check up on him or behave like an actual family that acts like they WANT to be around him rather than having to tolerate his presence.

(’Everybody loves Dick Grayson’, most of the Batfamily cite as a source of resentment in some fics, accompanied by an eyeroll. Because despite that supposedly being a truism, almost every actual character in those fics seems irritated or annoyed by him merely walking in the door).

Let his family put in a little effort to seeing behind the mask they all know he wears at times. Let them take the initiative to try figuring out what’s bothering him rather than point to that mask as proof he just doesn’t want anyone to know. When there’s no acknowledgment that their own reactions to his attempts to air grievances in the past quite feasibly gives him a lot of reason to doubt they even want him to take off that mask around them. Given how, as mentioned previously…the vast majority of his canon conflicts with them end with him being the one to cave and get over it, even if he had nothing to do with initiating the conflict. Constantly being told that your reasons for being at odds with a family member aren’t Valid doesn’t exactly inspire confidence that opening up about your current hurts will end any better this time.

Let his family WAIT to hear his reaction to things rather than just presuming they all know exactly how he’ll react based on their own specific views of him, and then jump straight to reacting off of that while he has to play catch up and ends up boxed into the position they assumed he was going to take, rather than ending up there because it was where he WANTED to end up.

Let his family apologize to him for shit they do or say, as often as they expect and demand apologies for every little slight he makes - not to mention a number of ones that weren’t actually his.

Let his family hear and validate and understand and sympathize with his anger, rather than deeming it a flaw and disproportionate and over the top. While at the same time expecting him to always validate and understand and sympathize and get over them killing people because of their own anger, nursing grudges for several years because of their own anger, saying cold and cutting and cruel things to him and telling him to get lost because of their anger, etc, etc.

Let his family be understanding and protective of his childhood mementos of his first family - as in his literal name and his mantle of Robin and the costumes inspired by his family - I’ve said it before and likely will a hundred times again, but I will never understand why this is such a sticking point for people. Why is it not abundantly obvious that if you actually want to delve into the emotions and thoughts and opinions of a character who was orphaned at a young age, your narrative priority should probably not be to first and foremost make sure you find a place to sneak in your latest penis joke about his name. We get it. His name is another word for cock and that’s weird and silly to you. But so much so that you just have to find a way to sneak it into literally every fic about him, even at the expense of your narrative tone or your other characters’ characterization?

Because hate to break it to people, but when you have Jason ready to pound someone into the ground for disparaging Catherine in his earshot, but then write him turning around and two scenes later making a sport out of coming up with new and clever ways to weaponize his brother’s refusal to give up the name he associates with his dead parents, like…you just made Jason a hypocrite and an asshole there, for the sake of a penis joke at Dick’s expense. That’s what that actually was. The dick jokes don’t actually say or do or change anything about Dick whatsoever, in any story I’ve ever read. They only ever actually make everyone making those jokes seem a little less likable to any reader whose first reaction isn’t to giggle. Like, is reusing the same basic handful of jokes over and over really worth that? Are we all five?

Honestly, I think the reason I keep coming back to this specific trope so often is like…I constantly hear fans of other Bat characters say they have trouble connecting with Dick or empathizing with him because he feels less real, they have trouble understanding or relating to what makes him tick, there’s too much shiny and not enough actual depth to his character.

But to be perfectly blunt…when someone’s priority in a scene is coming up with jokes about Dick’s name rather than putting themselves in that character’s headspace and trying to come up with angles for why he would keep that name, despite all the jokes and ridicule he gets for it…like. The problem there is not with Dick’s character or lack of depth or being too hard to relate to or understand. The problem there is they simply don’t care to examine that character’s depth and emotions and motivations and what makes him tick, because they’re having too much fun using him as the butt of every other character’s jokes. And I mean, hey, you do you, but people being unable to move past the penis jokes about a character whose name has been that for eighty years, like…that’s about reader/writer priorities, not an absence of character material.

But anyway, moving on. Again like, try having his siblings actually respect his ways of honoring of his parents and childhood, rather than expecting him to placidly accept being the eternal butt of everyone’s jokes but also to never ever be inconsiderate or absent-minded about their own origins or childhoods.

Let his family respect and appreciate his contributions to their family, the superhero community at large, and their own lives, rather than only ever pointing to his time as Robin or his central place in the superhero community or in their family as a reason to resent him or somehow deem him completely unworthy of any kind of respect. But again, nobody better catch him ever disrespecting one of the later Robin’s skills or contributions to the mantle and community, because how dare he, only they’re allowed to resent or disrespect his time as Robin.

Let his family express actual gratitude for all the times he shows up for them and puts them first, rather than only ever pointing out the times he fails to do so, or doesn’t do so precisely in the ways they expected or wanted him to.

Let his family actually acknowledge his sacrifices on their own behalves, rather than simply expect them to exist, and thus deem them not worthy of notice or recognition.

Let his family be mindful of his traumas and as careful and considerate about them as they expect him to be about their own, rather than forgetting he has any at all, or handwaving them away as not that big a deal and deciding he’s incapable of understanding or relating to anything they’ve been through because he’s had such a better life in comparison.

Let his family remember that he spent his entire childhood with Bruce out on the streets fighting crime and trying his best to save people, often at the expense of normal childhood milestones and accumulating all sorts of injuries and traumas and witnessing just about every horror man can heap upon each other in the process, rather than scoffing at him as spoiled and sheltered because out of all of them, he spent the most time living in an actual mansion.

They wear HIS mantle after all, follow in HIS footsteps, not Bruce’s. Why do people concentrate so much on writing Jason and Tim and Damian’s conflicts over Robin and fights born of its importance to each of them....when judging by every scene they share with Dick in the same fanfics, the three of them often dismiss him as spoiled, shallow, indulged, out of touch with the ‘real world’ or just generally have no respect for...their predecessor....whose mantle still nevertheless means so much to them, they come to blows over it?

Just…let Dick be what he already is, rather than acting like he only exists as one of two opposite extremes and needs everything else rewritten or reframed as a character flaw or else he can’t possibly be deemed compelling or interesting.

You really want a three-dimensional, interesting and compelling Dick Grayson, rather than just a golden retriever on two legs, a source of comedic relief, a humorous punching bag, a handy dandy family therapist, or the Designated Asshole?

You don’t actually need to do anything to his character…other than give it the same courtesy you give to every other character around him.

Just let him be freaking human.

[queenmorgawse]

transmigration for dummies

chapter four. mdzs scum villain au. concept credit to @lee-luca. read on ao3 for end notes.  previous | first | next

About halfway ( according to his questionable sense of direction, anyway ) to Mo Village, Lan Fan catches up to him, hovering about five feet away. Jingyi sees her lips moving, but her words are lost to the whistling wind. “What?” he screams back.

She makes a face and shouts at him, in defiance of at least three Gusu Lan rules, “Mom came back yesterday, she told me to tell you you’ve got to look after me and also share your food!”

“Mom?”

“Yeah! Just because I see her more than you do doesn’t mean you don’t need to listen to her!” She points a threatening finger in his direction. “I’ll tell her if you bully me!”

Jingyi’s only half listening to her. His head is reeling. Since when does the original have a little sister, or a family at all? Whose headcanon is this?!

Lan Fan is still looking at him expectantly, though the effect is a bit ruined by the way the wind keeps whipping her long hair back in her face. “Got it,” he manages to garble out after about thirty awkward seconds of silence. Satisfied, she pours another load of spiritual energy into her sword, willing it to go faster. She catches up to her friends in the front in no time, leaving Jingyi to his existential crisis.

Come to think of it, it’s not that weird for him to have an entire sister he didn’t know was his sister, even though they’d only met about four days into his new life. They don’t look that much alike - he and Lan Fan must take after different parents, even if he doesn’t know who they are either. Plus, with the way the Lan clan literally has the girls and women living in an entirely separate part of the Cloud Recesses, the two of them probably never spent much time in the other’s company outside of training.

The thought makes Jingyi’s stomach churn with unease. Up until now, he only had to worry about not looking too suspicious in front of his fellow disciples. He can probably manage Lan Fan too, if the way she acts towards him is any indication. It’s relatively safe to assume he doesn’t have a father either : if they live in the same part of the Cloud Recesses, they would have run into each other by now, right?

He can fool his friends. He can even fool Lan Sizhui, who knows him best out of everyone here. But can he really look a mother in the eye and pretend he’s her son?

They’re not real, Jingyi tells himself. They’re just people the System created. But even as he repeats this mantra, he knows he’s not convinced. Everyone is too fleshed out, even compared to their novel counterparts, for him to treat them like they’re disposable.

It doesn’t matter, he ultimately decides. He won’t have to get used to having a dad, at least. Lan Fan, though ⎯ he can’t just brush her off. They have a mother, even if he doesn’t know her name yet, and she’s counting on him to protect Lan Fan.

Well, in light of their comparative fighting prowess, she might have to be the one doing the protecting, but it hopefully won’t come to that.

Jingyi spares a thought for Nie Mingjue’s dismembered arm waiting for them in Mo village, and silently revises that statement.

-

Within five minutes of knowing her, Jingyi can safely say this : Madam Mo reminds him of his least favorite middle school teacher. Granted, Mrs Robin didn’t dress this fancy, but she certainly sneered down her nose at people a lot and never pronounced Jingyi’s name right, despite it really not being as hard as it could have been. About halfway through the year, Jingyi had given up and started calling her by her full name, Mrs Robin-Banks, which had earned him about a month of scraping the undersides of tables clean of bubble gum.

Exactly like he used to do in class, he tunes out of her speech about how her son definitely has the potential to be a cultivator, if only a great clan - any of them, of course not theirs specifically - would notice him and take him under their wing…

On his left side, Tao Ming rolls his eyes so hard they actually go white for a second, right before Lan Fan discreetly elbows him in the ribs. It takes all of Jingyi’s self-control not to do the same.

He may have been watching the door for Mo Xuanyu’s arrival, but it still doesn’t prepare him to the chaos that erupts when the man himself barges into the hall.

Jingyi isn’t sure how much of the effect can be chalked up to his own knowledge of the character, but Wei Wuxian is a riot from his very first moment here. While the other disciples look on, half fascinated and half appalled, he leans forward, following the other’s movements. Energy runs through Wei Wuxian like a wire, whether he is scampering about the room to escape the servants or taunting Mo Ziyuan and his parents. Saying he can’t stay still would be an understatement.

As entertaining as the situation is, it is also highly awkward, especially when one of the girls reaches for Mo Xuanyu to help him to his feet, revealing the red footprint at the center of his chest. Despite knowing this beforehand, the sight makes Jingyi sick.

“Did everyone see that? Did you? The burglar is also beating someone up! How heartless!”

While he was lost in thoughts, Wei Wuxian dusted himself off, and is now pointing an accusing finger at his ‘cousin’. Before Jingyi can remember his mission or say anything, Sizhui’s calm voice cuts through the commotion. “Please calm down. Words are more powerful than weapons.”

Yeah, but it’d help a lot if I could punch this guy in the face. If he thought watching or reading about Mo Ziyuan going on his mama’s boy spiel, the entire thing pales in comparison to real life. Jingyi is itching to leap across the tea table and throttle him with his bare hands so he’ll just stop talking, but that might be an infraction unforgivable even for the most un-Lan Lan to ever Lan.

Sensing the shift in atmosphere, Wei Wuxian stays behind Sizhui, peeking out from behind his shoulder with all the offended dignity of a jilted maiden.

Madam Mo’s smile looks plastered on, like the smallest tug would be enough to peel it off her face. “This is my younger sister’s son. He’s not so bright here ; everyone from the Mo Village knows that he is a lunatic, and often speaks strange words that shouldn’t be taken seriously. Cultivator, please…”

“Who said that my words shouldn’t be taken seriously? Next time, try stealing anything from me again. You steal once, and I cut off one of your hands!” Wei Wuxian interrupts. Jingyi winces. Of course, no one here can possibly know the weight these words carry, but let him cringe in peace, okay?

Lan Fan chances a glance towards Sizhui. “Shixiong, should we…” In an attempt to be subtle, she glares towards the fuming members of the Mo family, then schools her expression into a serene one when turning to their leader again.

Sizhui clears his throat. “We will borrow the West Courtyard for the night. Please remember the things that I’ve talked about—after nightfall, close all of the windows, don’t come outside, or worse, walk toward the courtyard.”

Nice try, dude.

To be fair, Jingyi feels a little mean, just letting things happen. Plot-essential as they are, this night did result in the death of four (he thinks?) people.

【Canon events must proceed as they were written,】the System pings, sealing the debate.

-

Things cool down after that. Their little group files out of the hall in their usual orderly fashion and gets to work, evacuating the last of the servants from the West Courtyard and unpacking their supplies. It’s almost pastoral.

Trouble finds them all the same, while Jingyi is checking on the position of the last of the Spirit Attraction flags.

He spots Mo Xuanyu’s ghastly makeup from a mile away. Telling the protagonist off is useless, he knows, but a good little Lan disciple would have to enforce the most basic of the instructions they gave. “Hey, you! Go back, alright? No one’s allowed here until we’ve dealt with the corpses!”

As expected, Wei Wuxian ignores him, hopping up on the roof and making a grab for the nearest flag. Even if Jingyi wanted to catch him, he couldn’t have ; for someone who was dead twenty-four hours ago and received a nasty beating since, the man is surprisingly nimble.

“Give it back!” he still shouts, chasing after him. “Weren’t you a cultivator once? You should know better than to mess with that!”

“I’m not giving it back, I’m not giving it back! I want this thing! I want this!” Wei Wuxian sing-songs back, sticking to his role as the local madman. Where’s the guy’s Oscar, huh? This is Amy Adams all over again.

Fortunately, all his flailing about gives Jingyi time to catch up. He grabs him by the arm, shaking the flag out of his slackened grip. “There!”

“Jingyi, don’t hit him. He’s not feeling well.” Sizhui must have been drawn in by the ruckus, leaving his own side of the flag formation.

“I didn’t hurt him!” Jingyi protests. “He was the one making a mess first!”

Sizhui gave him an understanding look, then turned back to Wei Wuxian. “Young master Mo, it’s getting late, and we’ll start capturing the walking corpses soon. For your own safety, please return to your room. The flag…”

“It’s just a flag, so what’s the big deal?” Wei Wuxian cuts in with a huff. “I can draw way better than this!” Before the other juniors’ astonishment can manifest, he’s sprinted off, leaving the discarded flag lying in the dust behind him.

Lan Fan and a few of her friends giggle from their own positions on the roof, while Tao Ming glares at the direction Wei Wuxian disappeared in. “What a maniac! Why can’t these people even follow simple rules?”

“It’s all right, A-Ming,” Sizhui soothes. “We still have time, so let’s just fix it up before sunset. As long as he doesn’t come back, everything will be fine.”

“Back to work, everyone!” Jingyi adds. It earns him a 【Uncharacteristic willingness to follow orders : -5 points.】alert, which he responds to with a classy middle finger behind Sizhui’s retreating back.

The OOC function really can’t come a second too soon.

-

The rest of the evening goes by uneventfully. Once it’s clear that Mo Xuanyu will not be coming back before dawn, their group wastes no time fixing the flag formation and preparing their weapons. When dinner comes around, Jingyi dutifully shares half of the veggie buns the Mo family servants bring them with Lan Fan.

To his relief, it doesn’t prompt any family bonding for them. Not that they would have had much time to talk, since his little sister spent most of the meal trying to fit as many baozi into her mouth as she could, which would surely not be as tolerated in the Lan clan dining hall.

The handful of corpses that do show up, hooked in by the flags, are more than easy to dispel. Even Jingyi, who can admit he chickens out easily, feels almost bored chopping the slow, clumsy undead to pieces. It’d be a peaceful night, if not for his knowledge that sooner or later, they’d all be summoned to the main hall again to be witnesses to a murder.

-

Bingo, Jingyi thinks when a young serving girl bursts into the West courtyard, shaking like a leaf. Her sobs wake up the few disciples who dozed off following their watch schedule ; they reach for their swords in no time, expecting another wave of corpses. It does nothing but scare the poor girl further.

Jingyi reaches her first. “What happened?” he asks, knowing full well what just went down.

The girl sniffles. She’s really a child, possibly younger than Lan Fan. “I-Madam Mo told me to call you because, because…” She cuts herself off with another sniffle, curling into herself.

“Breathe,” he advises her. “With me, okay?”

She follows suit, obediently inhaling and exhaling in sync with him, until her shaking has subsided enough for her to form a coherent sentence. “Cultivators, Mistress wants to see you as soon as possible. She said…” Another hiccup. “She said the lunatic killed her son!”