#‘we meant at my birth’

[heyyallitssatan]

I thought tumblr would enjoy this

So recently my mother and a very good friend of hers went to a soft ball game together

This is totally normal behavior however

They went on the inauguration day for the new “lovers field”

My mother, the poster child for bisexuality, and her friend, who looks like if lesbianism had a spokesperson, went to a softball game together on the inauguration day for lovers field

My mother didn’t understand at first just how gay they looked, and apparently more than one person, in particular several older ladies and gentlemen, commented how cute they were together

I love my mother dearly but she can be a bit oblivious

[wonder-worker]

Thinking about Elizabeth Woodville as a gothic heroine is making me go insane. She entered the story by overturning existing social structures, provoking both ire and fascination. She married into a dynasty doomed to eat itself alive. She was repeatedly associated with the supernatural, both in terms of love and death. Her life was shaped entirely by uncanny repetitions - two marriages, two widowhoods, two depositions, two flights to sanctuary, two ultimate reclamations, all paralleling and ricocheting off each other. Her plight after 1483 exposed the true rot at the heart of the monarchy - the trappings of royalty pulled away to reveal nothing, a never-ending cycle of betrayal and war, the price of power being the (literal) blood of children. She lived past the end of her family name, she lived past the end of her myth. She ended her life in a deeply anomalous position, half-in and half-out of royal society. She was both a haunting tragedy and the ultimate survivor who was finally free.

[lgbtlunaverse]

I have been thinking on the nature of mdzs as a deliberately vague text that leaves many things up to interpretation, and how i've slowly come to understand "up for interpretation" less as "there is One True version of this story i must find" and not even as " Everyone has a different One True Version of this story inside their head be based on their interpretations and the differences don't make one wrong and the other right" but as "There is no One True Version. Even in my own subjective interpretation of the text multiple things can be true at once" specifically, in regard to Jin Guangyao and the many things which are left up in the air as to whether he did them or not, most notably killing his son.

There's evidence for this, but it's non conclusuve (jgy saying he killed him while also saying he killed Qin Su, who very much killed herself. The speculations on how he'd have killed him being sect leader yao just saying shit. ) it is, esentially, just up in the air enough that if you decisively fall on one side of the debate is probably says more about you and your general opinion of jgy than it does about the "true" events of canon.

I have, as a proud apologist, always fallen on the "he didn't kill him but felt in some way responsible for his death." Side but recently have become more okay with the interpretation that maybe he DID kill him, and that at the very least, that when he tells Qin Su their son "needed to die" he is being genuine. Which, once you look at it beyond. "Is jgy a poor lil meow meow who it is Okay to Like or an irredeemable baby murderer" becomes both INCREDIBLY tragic and deeply interesting. Because here is a man condemned for who his parents were and who wants nothing more than to live, saying that it is possible to be so cursed by your heritage that you need to die. There is no existence for you. The exact same thing that has been said to him.

Of course being born out of wedlock to a sex worker and being a product of incest are different things, but that begs the question: where is the line? What crimes of the father can mean death for the son? How cursed can you be until your existence is so incompatible with society it is you who needs to give? And if there is... where is it? Qin su clearly thought she was past it. Was his son really past it? Is he?

[plaguedoctormemes]

I’m not smart or well-read enough to give a ton of examples but after learning that fantasy (as a genre) originated as more of a sci-fi setting with some aesthetic familiarity to the real-life medieval period my patience for people talking about “historical accuracy” ranging from justifying the lack of women and minorities in their settings to bitching about highly-specific nitpicky details of ‘medieval’ clothing and culture (once again, applied to a FANTASY setting) has plummeted to 0%

Yes, you heard that exactly. Fantasy nowadays is its own defined genre, but at its core, ‘fantasy’ as we know it is derived from an essentially classic sci-fi perspective. With all of the uses that people use for sci-fi as well: a creative vessel where someone created a whole alternative world with the means to comment on or criticize our current world.

[punmster]

being ace means i don't get giggly or horny about omegaverse aka abo but instead become painfully obsessed with details in anatomy and world building

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

btw :) you know how I wrote a book called moth work :) and feeding habits :) and body back :) and hallowed bodies :) and changing states :) and many, many more? well :) the parent series of all those books TURNS NINE TOMORROW!!!

to celebrate… would anyone wanna send me asks about the series??? and we can chat about it!!!

[damianurl]

mother's day ...... hmmmmm .....

a lot of people dunk on father's day (as they should if the circumstances are fitting) but tbh my dad is the reason why i have great relationships with men and don't hate them entirely (yet lol there is still time 😉) he has done a complete 180 of his whole entire being spiritually and physically he is my champion of change he has set the bar SO high for me in regards to male friendships and partners my mother on the other hand is still stuck in yesterday which is now 20 years ago atp i have shown grace and know she was also "just a girl" i have met her where she has been at always and it has never been reciprocated on my end when i have been in need like going through your 20's as a young woman without a more "feminine" or motherly figure to guide you about absolutely anything really can warp a woman i have definitely taken charge and self ownership to be a mother to myself and to those around me who need that as well but damn it's not talked about enough daddy issues are so openely talked about in society because it is easy to talk below of men but how dare some of us talk about having not so sweet mothers or simply the absent/deadbeat parent happening to be female mostly goes ignored 🙃 don't get me wrong i get why it is more rare for women to do that to their children in the deadbeat department but they do exist and i see every young woman out there going through that as well and am sending all of the love and healing "energy" to them anyways I am at peace I will never have a relationship like that with my mother it doesn't have to define me and I can still be the woman of my dreams without her

[druidgroves]

people who have to write out my full name & then decide not to capitalize the L even with the correct way sitting right in front of them will taste my blade

[ninja-yogurt]

Thinking about how as a kid I was pretty convinced my cat was kind of apathetic to me because I would pick him up and drag him to my room when I wanted to cuddle with him and he didn't approach me on his own very often, especially compared to his brother who would happily demand attention from anyone and everyone. And how my brother and I got little rubber mice one Halloween and I lost mine and was devastated and kind of bratty about it, and went to cry on the floor of my room for reasons I don't really remember. And my cat, who never approached me in his own, comes up to me with the mouse in his little mouth and drops it next to me.

And I don't think he understood why I was upset but the fact that he saw me upset and decided to bring me something to cheer me up, and came up to me of his own volition, I was convinced for the rest of his life that he was one of the most emotionally intelligent cats I'd ever met, and that he loved me more than anyone else in the world. I swear nearly every expression of love he had was something he picked up from me. He loved being picked up like the person petting him was too impatient to wait for him to approach them. For years he'd come running at the sound of my fingers rubbing together in an attempt at a snap, but when I figured out how to actually snap he ignored it. I wasn't very good at petting gently, and his favorite thing was when somebody used all their strength to push against his head while they pet him. I read a book on cat communication when he was still a kitten and spent an evening headbutting him because it said that's how they say hello and communicate affection, and I don't remember him headbutting everything and everyone in sight before that but he sure did enjoy it afterwards.

When I came home from college he would frequently be standoffish towards me until I, allergic to him, would sneeze for the first time, and then he would demand attention like it took that to be sure I was who I said I was. He would get cuddlier when I sneezed, probably because I would frequently turn to him after and say in a sweet, fond voice, "yes! This is all your fault, yes!" Sometimes he'd make eye contact with me before he sneezed. I think he thought the sneezing itself was affection. Once when I came home I cuddled with him until he was half asleep on my lap and at 1 am I started trying to move him without waking him up, or annoy him into moving himself, because I didn't have the heart to just abandon him but I needed to go to bed. He must have been more awake than I thought because when I fully lifted up one leg so it was next to him instead of under him he just readjusted on the other one, and then did the same with the other leg. It was pretty impressive for a cat who once accidentally rolled off a couch because I was standing across the room and he got too excited about trying to convince me to approach him that he forgot where the edge was.

I took so many pictures of him and asked my family to take and send so many pictures and videos and video chats with him that he also got excited by smartphones, because a camera pointed at him meant he got extra attention. It was so hard to get good pictures of him; if he noticed the camera he got very wiggly.

He had a fang taken out when he was starting to get older, because it was infected, and he figured out how to eat without it but he never quite figured out how to close his mouth consistently. He's always had a remarkably expressive face; i swear he used to smile when he was happy and I never needed to see the rest of his body to tell when he'd been startled. But for a cat who frequently looked confused before, sometimes having one lip snagged inside his mouth really improved the look. My mom started saying he had an Elvis face now.

Losing the tooth did not stop him from stealing a piece of toasted turkey ham from a plate on the table once. I was walking back from the kitchen, trying to help my dad prepare breakfast, and as I approached he decided the best thing to do when caught red handed with a piece of meat about a full quarter of your size is to sprint off with it, which might have worked better if it wasn't a quarter of his size and he didn't have a missing tooth. He made it most of the way across the room with it hanging from his mouth, somehow swinging slightly and dragging on the floor at the same time, before he gave it up. I wish I'd gotten it on camera, because I was the only one who saw the whole thing.

He stopped meowing as much and couldn't really purr by the end. What he'd do instead of meowing was squeak like a rusty wheel if he wanted food and wail like he was dying if he wanted attention and nobody was in the room with him. Occasionally he'd go into my parents' room when there were people around and wail because nobody was in his extra special cuddle spot. For about fourteen years of his life the only time I heard that meow was when he had bladder crystals and had to be rushed to the vet, and when he got stuck once hanging from one of those scratching posts that could hang from a doorknob, flipped his head back so it was upside down in relation to the ground and he was staring at me, and gave one of the saddest meows I've ever heard in my life. (Unfortunately for him it took me a few seconds to stop laughing my head off to actually come help, but he was fine). I came home when he was older and suddenly he'd realized that that wail meant immediate attention, and why not abuse it in exchange for more cuddles.

I miss him a lot. It was my first birthday without him this past week. Last year my favorite present was handmade by my brother, and when it arrived I got extra pictures of it before it was shipped out lying on top of him (cat, not brother). I dreamt about him a lot, for a while, but I haven't since a dream where I spent a bunch of time cuddling with him and he purred like a motorboat. I like to think it was him telling me he'll be ok, even if I don't dream about him again for a while.

[spotsupstuff]

2 shrimps down 13 more to go! Runner and Aid you guys have quite the work cut out for you! Go big or go home sjhsjsj

i mean...

the man might have backed out a wee bit

[bookwyrminspiration]

Confession: I didn't realize your pfp was a skull until now

Well, to be fair pfps display rather small, so it’s incredibly easy to see something that isn’t quite right in that tiny square—I incorrectly see my mutuals pfps all the time, I just get the general vibe and accept I’m not seeing the details right

But yeah! It’s a cracked skull with a mildly glitching lotus flower growing out of an eye socket :)

Out of curiosity, what did you think my pfp was, if you have an answer to that?

[alien-girl-21]

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[rosereign]

My brothers aren’t here but being surrounded by my family just reminds me how much I love them. They are much more than the evil voices in my head 🫶🏽

[lovecrazedpup]

cont.

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

actually it's so evil that I'm listening to "harrison (1983)" while trying to write changing states

[sixth-light]

I have had these thoughts bubbling away in my head for like...eighteen months or so now (it will become very obvious why shortly) but the discussion in this post has pushed me to write them down: I think societally we HUGELY underestimate how motherhood for primary caregivers, particularly first-time motherhood, can be a source of vulnerability to radicalisation.

There is obviously huge cultural variance here, but for a lot of cis women becoming primary caregiver to an infant in a capitalist Western society represents a time of immense vulnerability because in general you are:

Incredibly sleep-deprived (which has well-documented knock-on effects for your judgement, mental health, etc)

If you gave birth, recovering from a significant challenge to your physical health (even in the best-case scenario)

Isolated from your previous networks and communities of people in full-time work

Completely separated from the context of your prior career goals and achievements

Under huge amounts of stress to learn how to care for an infant (don't get me started on breastfeeding)

And on top of this, you are also be experiencing a huge amount of messaging about how all this is natural, wonderful, something you're meant to do, something you should love doing, and something that you must do for the welfare of their child. It's a huge amount of pressure and life change even when everything goes right and there's very little cultural space to express negative feelings about it.

Any group of people who offer community, support, and affirmation to cis women in this situation are going to have a really good shot at radicalising them into some very weird and dangerous headspaces and in fact we see this happen all the time - think antivaxxers and TERFs. It flies under the radar because of the hazy positive glow that associates with motherhood and babies and also because we don't take the radicalisation of women seriously I guess because they rarely shoot anybody, but...yeah. It is such a vulnerable time!