#‘so i will wait for the next time you want me like a dog with a bird at your door’ YOU WILL DO NO SUCH THING BITCH I FORBID IT !!!!

[goatgoesmbe]

When you're divorced to Price, you're not divorced to the team

Johnny still tried and invite you to everything they're doing, whether it is some kind of celebration or simple hangout.

And you felt rude to deny it, just because you're divorced.. doesn't mean you should stop having mutual friends with your ex-husband right?

Kyle still texted you from time to time, asking if you baked anything today. Making not so subtle hints of him- and the others, missing your baking.

Out of the corner of your eyes, you saw John walking past the door. You didn't know why, but you did save one cupcake. So as the others were occupied, you snuck away to put it on his desk.

So you visited their base, carrying a box of cupcakes in the rec room as you watched them demolish your work- oh god the cupcake wrap isn't edible Johnny.

And Simon?

Well.. before you were divorced, John used to make him keep an eye on you since he was too busy with work. Being your guard dog when you hang out around the base, or to take care of stuff if you have any trouble at home.

Like right now.

"Simon, i'm so, sorry about this- i already called a plumber and for some reason they canceled last minute, and I just can't wait another day to get it fixed-" You rambled as you watched him look at what's wrong with your washing machine, days worth of laundry piling up near it.

"It's alright" He simply responded. "Don't bother calling them next time, you have me" he added.

Then there's Laswell.

You've always got along so well with her, so it wasn't a surprise when she invited you to a ceremony where she would renew her vow with her wife.

It's been a while since you doll up properly and wear a dress. But you try to not feel self-conscious as you stepped out of your car. You didn't want to give your ex-husband the satisfaction. You wanted to look fine, more than fine, like the divorce didn't affect you.

It was easier said than done with the way you could feel his eyes from across the room as you tried to ignore him and focus on your conversation with Kate and her wife.

Goddamn, can he stop that, he's really making you nervous.

Sighing, you took a sip of a champagne that was served. Maybe the alcohol would help.

...

You woke up with a throbbing headache and turned your head to groan at the fluffy pillow. Fuck, you drank too much.

Opening your eyes slowly, you blinked when you saw a figure lying beside you.

John.

John?!

Your head throbbed even more when you sat up too fast. Looking under the blanket, you sighed when you see that you're clothed at least. Even though it wasn't the dress you wore last night.

Sighing, your gaze shifted to the man beside you and took in the scene that was too familiar to you once upon a time.

Against your better judgement, you laid back down. And for some reason, you didn't move away when a pair of strong arms wrapped around your waist.

Why did you divorce him again?

[gothamite-rambler]

Batman and Jim faced a woman who has the flu, her boyfriend was on the floor crying with a knife in his thigh.

Liz: I have the flu, not that 'flu', but regular flu. I am not feeling well. I just wanted to have my broth and relax in bed until my flu went away. Then… that motherfucker!

Liz pointed to her soon-to-be ex-boyfriend who glared back at her.

Liz: Was like, "Let's cook together! Let's cook together!" Like a damn Muppet!

Kyle: I don't sound like Kermit the Frog!

Jim: Maybe don't keep talking.

Liz: Thank you! Anyways, he said if I went to the store to shop, he'd make me a meal that I could digest, because you know I'm sick! So I relented, we got the stuff, went home and I couldn't 'cook together'. I couldn't stand… I could barely walk! Kyle sucked his teeth in denial

Liz: I went to bed and thought he would leave me alone, maybe bring me some Campbell's soup. He came in the room with a cutting board, a bell pepper and a knife.

Batman (pointing to the knife in the man's thigh): The knife that's in his thigh?

Liz nodded, hands on her hips.

Liz: Oh yeah, I lost it. I'm not proud to admit it, but "cooking together" with that man is me doing ninety percent of the cooking! He does this with all his family and I can usually let it go, but not when I'm going through the flu!

Kyle: Oh my God, I had a cold at ten and it wasn't even that bad. You're such a—

Liz tossed the bell pepper she had been gripping in her hand directly at Kyle's head, making him grunt and interrupting his whining for a second.

Kyle (whining again): I just wanted to cook together!

Jim: You keep saying that, but that doesn't mean anything. Especially since she's sick. Why would you want her to cook when she has the flu? Also you lied to her, you promised her a dinner you'd cook.

Kyle: There is a knife in my thigh!

Jim (jokingly): You're alive. I got stabbed once and could still work so that means yours can't be that bad.

Liz: He's done crap similar to this. One time he did that stupid TikTok challenge where the guy says 'what's for dinner, bitch?' and I let it slide, but what he did was uncalled for! Batman has said anything, but I'm ready for my scolding.

Batman covered his mouth, unintentionally laughing. He turned to Jim, placing his hand on the man's shoulder.

Batman: This is fucking wild!

Jim nodded, rubbing his eyes and laughing as well.

Batman: I'm sorry, I just keep picturing you grabbing the knife and jabbing it into his thigh and he shouts "I just wanted to cook together!"

Jim: This fucking guy. He's like the dog that keeps bringing the ball back and I just want to rest.

Liz started laughing next, still pissed but glad two other men were on her side.

Liz: Dude, agree. I couldn't take his nonsense anymore.

Kyle: I'm right here!

Liz scoffed rolling her eyes.

Liz: Look I know I overreacted, but he promised to make dinner and give me my medicine then brought me a cutting board!

Batman: Which is the worst task to give a sick person. Bringing a knife and cutting board in bed. You're going to prison, but I don't blame you.

Jim: Yeah, you overreacted, but he's alive. We just have to wait for the EMTs to take him away and then take you in for questioning. Honestly you might not get jail time.

Kyle (defiant, whining): I'm suing her either way!

Liz: I'll pay half of your medical bills douche. This was a good reason to dump him at least. Kyle, pack your shit later and leave. We're through.

Kyle: Fine! I'll find another—

Batman and Jim: STOP SAYING COOK TOGETHER!

Kyle pouted, resting on the ground with his arms cross while Liz sat down to blow her nose.

Based off a reddit story I saw on smosh pit that angered me so much I had to write a what if. In the AITA post OP is the boyfriend who brought in the cutting board and she didn't stab him (I would've hit him with the cutting board at least). I can only hope she dumped his ass.

[lightsoutmatthews]

We listen and we don´t judge - Mitch Marner

summary: you convince Mitch to do the "we listen and we don´t judge" TikTok trend

pairing: Mitch Marner x female!reader

word count: 1.5k

warnings: none, just banter and sweetness

authors notes:

I wanted to wait to post the next thing, as to not run out of stuff by next week but I remembered this exists and that it´s one of my favorite pieces so I just had to share

---------------------------------------------------------

“Please baby… It´s fun, I promise!” you begged your boyfriend for the third time in probably 30 minutes. “Babe…” He sighs playfully annoyed. “Please, I know you have some stuff to say, this is your chance to say it.”

You had been trying to convince him to do the “we listen, and we don’t judge” trend from TikTok after you had been seeing it all over your for you page. Even though you usually weren’t really one to post your relationship on you TikTok.

Your account was more about “day in the life of an NHL girlfriend” or “get ready with me for my boyfriends hockey game” videos which the small following you had acquired loved, Mitch only showing up in the background occasionally, but this was something you really wanted to do with him.

“I´m bad at coming up with tings on the spot.” He tried as his next excuse. You rolled your eyes. “We both know that is not true.” A funny sounding scuff leaving his mouth, almost like he was offended by the accusation.

“How about we film it, but you can decide after if I post it?” A last attempt to convince him, not wanting to bother him with it for too long. A sigh left him again and you knew you got him on the hook. “Fine. But you have to give me five minutes to come up with a few things.”

You practically ran around the kitchen island and wrapped your arms around his neck in excitement. “You´re the best.” He rolled his eyes acting fake annoyed but placed a sweet kiss to your cheek.

He retrieved to the living room with his phone to write some stuff down while you searched for the perfect place to film. Zeus, ever the loyal dog, stayed by your side, his tail wiggling in excitement for no reason at all. “We´ve got dad wrapped around our fingers and paws, Zeusy.” The lab barked in agreement.

“I heard that.” Mitch shouted from the living room. “You were supposed to!” You shot back immediately. Laughter filling the air shortly after.

A few minutes later you followed Mitch into the living room, Zeus hot on your heels but immediately jumping next to his dad when he saw him sitting on the couch. “Oh, now I´m good enough for you.” He chuckled and softly petted the labs head.

“Are you done?” He nodded. You placed your phone against a vase you grabbed from the kitchen and put it on the living room table. “Is this angle good enough for you?” Mitch huffed, mischief glinting in his eyes.

You knew he had nothing to really truly complain about, your relationship one built on trust and open communication, when something was bothering either of you, you mostly just talked about it, but this showed you there was something up his sleeve that you didn’t know about.

“Are you ready?” He grabbed his phone, opening the notes app again. “Let´s go.”

You pressed record on the device and held back laughter when Mitch looked at you with the most serious expression. “You go first.” You said, curious about what he came up with.

“We listen and we don’t judge, sometimes when I tell you I didn’t answer your call because I didn’t see it, it´s actually because I ignored it because I didn’t want to answer it in front of the guys.” Your eyes widen in surprise, laughter immediately bubbling out of you. “How dare you.” You threw in between two breaths, still laughing.

“You´re scared to answer the phone in front of the guys, that´s so sweet, honey.” You leaned over and softly patted his cheek, knowing this clip would be sent to the girls group chat later so they could show it to their partners.

“You´re not the one getting chirped.” He mumbled which led to another fit of laughter bubbling up. “You´re acting like you´re the only person on the team with a partner.”

He rolled his eyes and waved you off. “I thought this was we listen, and we don´t judge. Let´s hear yours.”

“We listen and we don’t judge, one time I threw away one of Zeus favorite toys, because it was really past it´s living time, and told you he probably lost it.” He ripped open his eyes and grabbed his chest like he just had been shot right in the heart.

“How can you do this to our child.”

“We don’t judge, Mitchy.” He raised his eyebrows, silently accusing you of doing the exact same just a few minutes ago.

“Okay your turn again.” You rushed out before he could say anything else. “We listen and we don’t judge, you once asked me to do laundry while you were on a girls trip, and I had to call Aryne to tell me what temperature and program to use.”

“Oh my god, Mitch.” You clapped your hands over your mouth. He chuckled, rubbing his neck. “I´m giving you a crash course on our washing machine as soon as we´re finished here, I can’t believe this.” You almost shouted before breaking into a fit of giggles.

“Let´s hear your next one then.” He interrupted you, not wanting to talk about this any longer. “We listen and we don’t judge.” You said, holding your hands in front of your mouth, before whispering: “Sometimes I cheer for the Flames when you´re not here.”

Mitch ripped open his mouth and turned further towards you with wide eyes. “Baby… please tell me that is a joke…” When you said nothing, he looked even more offended. “You cannot put this on the internet… what will the people say if my own girlfriend doesn’t root for the team I am playing for. That should be a punishable offence.”

“We don’t judge, remember? And what can I say, I will always be a Calgarian at heart no matter if I’m living in Toronto now. Or if my boyfriend plays for the Leafs. And it´s not like I´m rooting for them when they actually play you.”

He continued to look at you as if you had kicked his dog. “You´ll live, baby.” You said as you pat his cheek like he was a child that was upset about nothing.

“Okay, last one I could come up with in the five minutes you gave me.” He grabbed one of the decorative pillows and placed it in front of him like a shield. You raised your eyebrows at him but said nothing urging him to continue.

“We listen and we don’t judge. I use your face wash regularly and that´s why it´s always empty so much faster.” He gripped the pillow and held it in front of his face right as you swatted him in the shoulder with the back of your hand.

“Mitch, that´s expensive skincare, you can afford to buy your own.” Teasing was clear in your voice. It didn’t actually matter to you that he was using it. Especially, since most of the time he ended up being the one to pay for it. But acting fake outraged was fun. “I will go and buy you skincare for men next week when you´re on the road.”

He lowered the pillow again, hoping you were done attacking him, but you ripped it right out of his hand and smacked it into his face. The offended look on his face that waited for you when the pillow fell down on the soft carpet of your living room made you burst out in a loud belly laugh.

“You´re the worst. I´m breaking up with you.” He pouted, his voice making you laugh even harder. “Okay, it was nice knowing you. I´m taking Zeus.” You teased. Which made him pout even more.

It took you five minutes to calm down after that, whenever you remembered the look on his face you broke out in another set of giggles.

You would have to edit that out later but would keep as a memory because the pained look that slowly turned into an incredibly loving and soft glance as you kept laughing was something you wanted to keep forever.

“Okay I have one last one. When you´re done pouting.” He sat up straight, giving you his full attention again before you continued. “We listen and we don’t judge, sometimes, when you play on the West Coast, I go to bed before the game even starts because I´m so exhausted from work.”

You expected him to be fake outraged again, but he just looked at you with the sweetest expression you could imagine, you heart immediately melting. “That´s okay, honey. I know how exhausting your job can be.”

You were overwhelmed with the sweetness this man gave you sometimes. “Oh, Mitch.” You said quietly scooting closer to him to wrap your arms around his shoulders.

“What? Did you expect me to be outraged about that? I know how hard you work, there´s 82 games a season that you can watch, missing one is not the end of the world.” He placed a lingering kiss to your cheek.

The tender action having you get up and startle his lap before leaning down to capture his lips in a soft kiss. “You´re the sweetest.”

When you backed away again, remembering that the camera was still rolling in the background he grabbed your chin and pulled you down into another kiss.

“You might have to edit that out.” He brushed hair, that fell into your face while kissing, away and smiled. “So, you will let me post this?”

He chuckled. “As if I could ever say no to you.”

[cowboyshadows]

Babytrapping FWB Soap send tweet cw: dubcon creampie

He's young, he's drowning in pussy, and he sees John's under eye bags and decides that is NOT a life for him

Besides, he once killed a cactus plant someone gifted him. Bro is not being a good father LMAOO

So in principle? He doesn't wanna be a dad. He just wants to fuck around for as long as he can.

Enter you, a little obsessive about him. He eats pussy so well, and he fucks you like he's trying to kill you. That's exactly the kinda energy you need

Good ones never wait. He may not know it, but he wants to be locked up. What man doesn't wanna see (one of) their bird(s) all swollen and round with their baby? 🥺

At first you'll be normal about it. Like, you'll show him cute movies like Baby's Day Out, send him TikToks of fathers and their children giggling, and introduce him to your nieces and nephews. Anything to give him baby fever

He's good enough with them, but every time you mention even in passing that you want children, he immediately stiffens up. He'll ghost you for a few days, thinking you'll mellow down soon enough

The next time he sees you, you decide there's no other option for you but to go big. Dick appointment turned breeding appointment.

He's still a man. He has his kinks. He shows up to your place, and you wait until his tongue is between your legs to tell him that your condoms have expired.

'I'm not ovulating, I promise :)' and honestly? He's too hard to think straight. He mutters something about pulling out before sinking into you completely

When he tells you he's about to cum, you just look into his eyes with big puppy dog ones of your own, all 'I want it in me pwease :(' and he just goes stupid. Primal and animalistic at the thought of filling you up with his pups

You lock your legs around his waist, pushing him further in you as he shoots his load. If it doesn't take this time, you can always try again next month :)

[musings-ofthe-unamused]

Love and Deepspace Headcanons: Denial

A/N: My bestie is forcing me to try this game again... So I might as well make some stuff for it!

There's a surprising lack of gifs I can find on here, so I went ahead and made my own headers :3

Warnings: 18+

Ask Box: Open

Masterlist | Ko-Fi | VGen | Patreon

Xavier:

I personally think he isn't the type to be too into denial

Sure, I think he gets angry or annoyed

But it clears pretty quickly

And once he sees how much its affecting you… immediately stops

Apologizes instantly

Puppy dog eyes 

Your hand is pressed firmly against Xavier's abs. You bit your lip, trying to keep in your cool. It's not easy. You had already worked yourself up by kissing him senseless and pulling back when he tried to go further. But he had taken control quickly, taking off his clothes and going for your weak spot: your neck. 

No matter how much you apologized or told him to keep going, he just gave you a soft glare to shut you up. But you had enough. Your hips moved against his bulge. You frowned and tried to push him back against the bed.

"Xavier, I can't take it."

He blinked, his head raising to meet your gaze. "Huh?"

"I want it."

"O-Oh." His face flushed as if he realized what he was doing. His eyes softened. "S-Sorry."

"Come here."

Rafayel:

Him and his teasing

Fleeting kisses, barely touching you

That fucking smirk

He loves seeing you get frustrated

But it backfires 

And suddenly, he regrets denying you

Rafayel let out a huff as you pushed him down onto the couch. One moment, he was touching you in all the spots that were so close to where you needed that heat. The next, you had his hands pinned above his head as you straddled his hips. He stared up at you. He wasn't expecting this.

"Woah, there. Getting feisty?"

You smirked. "I don't think you're in the position to judge."

"No. But I like this position."

"Really?" You leaned down, nipping at his neck. "You won't like it for too long."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It's your turn to get frustrated."

Zayne:

I also feel like he isn't super into it?

The type to do it accidentally

Long nights working, barely paying attention to you

The occasional text or two

Not even sending a suggestive photo gets a big reaction

So imagine his surprise when he finally gives you the time of day

And you're waiting there like a feast waiting to be devoured

"You're finally back."

"Sorry. Work has been-" Zayne paused. He gaped at you. "What are you-"

"This? Just got comfortable. Is there a problem?"

There was a problem. Zayne had suddenly realised how much he craved you. It had been too long since he last touched you. He was denying you and himself of a pleasure that needed to be filled. 

He dropped his bag to the floor. His shoes and coat soon followed. His eyes were glued on your scantily clad form as he slowly walked over to you. You hid a smile as you watched him loosen his tie. This was the exact reaction you wanted. To make him so hungry for you, he wouldn't be able to resist.

"Do you have work tomorrow?" His husky voice sent a shiver down your spine.

"No." You shook your head.

"Good."

"Do you?"

"I'm calling off."

"Good."

Sylus:

Oh my god, nothing brings him more joy than denying you of what you want

He loves seeing you squirm 

The sweat dripping down the side of your face as he hits in just the right spot

You're teetering on the edge of pure ecstasy

But he just keeps pulling you back

Wants to see you beg

Sylus knew how to make you writhe in pure pleasure. He knew where to touch, kiss, bite. He knew he had you wrapped around his finger. And right now, you were so tightly wound, you were about to break. He drank in the sight of you arching your back, on your hands and knees for him. HIs thrusts were languid and relaxed. The two of you had been at this for hours.

He reached out, his large hand moving over the expanse of your bare back. "Look at you. A complete wreck."

"Please, Sylus." Your voice was hoarse. "I can't take it anymore."

"What did I say? You have to be clear when you beg."

You whimpered and gripped the sheets tightly in your hands. "Please make me cum, Sylus. Please…""Since you begged so nicely…" HIs hand wrapped around your head and tugged sharply. "I'll give you what you want."

Caleb:

He does it for one reason only

To see if you still need him

And boy, do you need him

Constantly asks you to tell him how you need this

Tell him that you need him

That you'll never stop

He'll keep denying you of it until you're almost in tears

And then he gives you what you want

"Tell me…"

Caleb's voice is soft against your ear. Your back arched as his fingers moved inside of you painfully slowly. Your face was flushed, lips parted as you hung onto him. Your body quivered in pleasure at just the sound of his voice. You wanted to be pushed past that peak.

"I need it."

"And?"

"I need you."

"You do?"

You nodded, swallowing thickly. "Please. I need you so badly, Caleb."

"I need you too."

Caleb kissed you deeply, his fingers plunging into you once again. The speed was faster this time. He curled his hand and sent you over the edge with just that one movement. You let out a cry that was swallowed by Caleb. He pressed against you. His heart was hammering in his chest. He never wanted to leave this moment. He wanted you to need him forever.

[lvnleah]

Roo’s drum kit

For weeks you had been begging Beth and Viv to buy you a drum kit. It was just a few weeks until Christmas and they’d taken you to Smyths Toys superstore and that’s where you’d gotten the idea from.

“Mamma!” You called out to Viv as you rushed straight over to the drum kit, “Look! It’s a drum kit!”

“Oh wow, look at that, Roo!” Viv smiled, side-eyeing Beth as they both knew what was coming.

You sat yourself down at the drumkit and grabbed the two sticks before bashing each drum with all your might, the sound echoing through the store. Viv winced slightly at the loud noise, but Beth just laughed, knowing there was no way to stop you now.

“I want one for Christmas!” You grinned, bouncing on the seat, completely undeterred by the noise.

Viv crouched down beside you, “Well, you definitely have the energy for it, don’t you?” she said, ruffling your hair. “But we’ll have to talk about it, okay?”

“Please, please, please!” You pleaded, eyes wide, trying to use your best puppy-dog eyes.

Viv glanced over at Beth, who shrugged. “We’ll see,” Beth said, “Let’s just finish up here, okay? How about we go look at the doll you want!”

You nodded eagerly, jumping off of the seat before rambling on about the new baby Annabell doll you wanted. Your little mind completely forgot about the drum kit until a few hours later when you started going on about it again.

For the next two weeks, you didn’t stop flaming about the drum kit and how you couldn’t wait to have one. Beth and Viv were both praying that by the time Christmas rolled around you would have completely forgotten about it.

It was around a week before Christmas when Steph had offered to take you out for the day while Beth and Viv spent a bit of time together. When you found out that your Auntie Steffy was taking you out for the day you were practically bouncing around.

“Mummy!” You screeched as you came running into the living room with your shoes, Myle and Calvin following at your feet. “Can Steffy take me to the toy shop? I can show her that drum kit!”

Beth chuckled as you flopped on the floor for her to help you put your shoes on, “Maybe if you’re good and ask Steffy nicely she will.”

“Ask me what nicely?” Steph said as she came out of her bedroom. She was currently living with you which you found fun.

“If we can go to the toy shop!” You smiled, jumping up from the floor and rushing over to Steph.

“Oh well, I’m sure if you’re good we can fit it in!” Steph agreed.

You let out a loud cheer and ran off to grab your coat, yelling, “I’m gonna show you the drum kit, Steffy! You’re gonna love it!”

Steph laughed and turned to Beth, who was leaning against the kitchen counter with a mug of tea. “A drum kit, huh?” Steph raised an eyebrow.

Beth groaned, shaking her head. “She’s been on about it nonstop for weeks. Viv’s ready to ban Smyths Toys from our outings.”

“Well, good luck saying no to that face,” Steph replied, ruffling your hair as you returned with your coat.

“Help me with my coat please?” You asked Steph politely who happily helped you slip it on and zip it up.

As Steph zipped up your coat, Viv appeared from her and Beth’s bedroom and you were quick to tell her about your plans for the day with Steph.

“We’re going to the toy shop, Mamma! I’m going to show Steffy the drum kit, and then maybe…” You paused, thinking hard, “Maybe we can even bring it home!”

Viv’s lips twitched with amusement as she knelt to smooth your coat. “Oh, is that so? Are you going to convince Auntie Steffy to buy it for you, Roo?”

You nodded, a big grin plastered across your face. “Steffy always says yes!”

Steph chuckled, shaking her head. “Don’t set me up like that, Roo. You know your mums are the bosses here.”

Beth chuckled, leaning over to kiss the top of your head. “Alright, cheeky monkey. You two have fun. And remember Roo, it’s not Christmas yet, so no sneaking any drum kits home today.”

You pouted dramatically but quickly perked up when Steph grabbed her bag and keys. “Ready, kiddo?”

“Yes! Bye, Mummy! Bye, Mamma!” you shouted, already tugging Steph towards the door.

Beth and Viv exchanged knowing looks as the door closed behind you and Steph. “You know she’s going to make Steph play that thing in the store,” Viv sighed.

Beth grinned. “Serves her right for offering to take her out. Let’s just hope Steph doesn’t give in and actually buy it.”

At the toy store, you practically dragged Steph straight to the drum kit aisle, your little legs moving as fast as they could.

“Here it is!” you announced proudly, pointing at the very same drum kit you had seen weeks ago. You climbed up onto the tiny stool and grabbed the drumsticks like a professional. “Watch this, Steffy!”

Steph crossed her arms, watching you with a mix of amusement and dread as you started banging away. The noise was even louder this time, echoing through the store and turning a few heads.

Steph winced but clapped when you finished. “Wow, Roo, that was… very loud.”

“It's so fun!” you beamed. “I’m really good! You can get it for me, right?”

Steph crouched down beside you, doing her best to keep a straight face. “Well, kiddo, I think your mums would have my head if I came home with this.”

“But why?” you pouted, giving her your best sad eyes.

Steph sighed, knowing full well she was no match for you. “How about we take a picture of you with it, and I’ll send it to your mums? Maybe that’ll help convince them.”

You grinned. “Okay! Take the picture!”

Steph snapped a quick photo of you grinning proudly behind the drum kit and sent it off to Beth and Viv with the caption: “Look who’s ready to start a band! 😅”

Beth replied almost instantly: “DO NOT buy that.”

Viv’s response came seconds later: “We’re begging you, Steph.”

Steph chuckled, showing you their messages. “See? Your mums aren’t ready for all that noise just yet.”

You frowned with a little pout, “But I really need it, Steffy,” you said, your bottom lip trembling. “It’s all I want!”

Steph sighed, already feeling herself caving. “Roo, I can’t just—”

You didn’t even let her finish as you made your pout even more dramatic. “But Steffy…” you whined.

Steph groaned, glancing at the drum kit and then back at your hopeful little face. “Okay, but only because you’re the cutest kid ever,” she muttered, already regretting her decision as you let out an ear-piercing squeal.

“Yay! I love you, Steffy!” you shouted, throwing your arms around her in a tight hug.

Steph paid for the drum kit, wincing at the price tag but unable to resist your excitement as you skipped out of the store, holding her hand and humming to yourself.

When the two of you got back home, Steph tried to sneak the drum kit into the house without Beth and Viv noticing. She managed to make it as far as the hallway before Beth’s voice rang out from the kitchen.

“Steph, is that what I think it is?” Beth called her tone a mix of pretend annoyance and amusement.

Steph froze, clutching the box like a guilty child. “Uh… surprise?”

Viv appeared next, her eyes widening when she saw the box of the drum kit. “You didn’t.”

“She did!” you announced proudly, bouncing into the room. “Steffy got it for me! Look!”

Beth pinched the bridge of her nose while Viv crossed her arms, glaring at Steph, trying to be stern but clearly holding back a laugh at Steph’s sheepish expression.

“She gave me the puppy-dog eyes!” Steph defended, setting the box down. “You try saying no to that face!”

Beth and Viv exchanged a glance before sighing in unison.

“Fine,” Beth said, crouching down to your level. “But, Roo, if you’re going to play the drums, you have to follow some rules, okay? No playing early in the morning or when anyone’s on a call or sick. Deal?”

You nodded eagerly. “Deal! Thank you, Mummy, thank you, Mamma!”

“And Steph,” Viv added dryly, shaking her head at the grinning Aussie, “you’re on drum duty when she drives us all crazy with that thing. I already don’t like it and it’s not even out of the box.”

“Fair enough,” Steph said with a chuckle, ruffling your hair.

You spent the rest of the day gleefully banging away on your new drum kit, filling the house with chaotic noise. Beth and Viv exchanged looks of mock regret while Steph sat on the couch, trying not to laugh as she watched you live your best life.

It was safe to say you were enjoying your little drum kit.

[polo-drone-110]

Who You Gonna Call

Part 4 - Mirror Mirror

Coach tightened the strap on his gear, rolling his shoulders like a boxer stepping into the ring. “We’re going back in.”

Ross hesitated, shifting his weight from foot to foot. “Already?” His voice carried the distinct tone of someone hoping for at least five more minutes of not dealing with a haunted death trap.

“We don’t have time to waste,” Coach said, double-checking his supplies. “If we’re getting Trevor and Chevy back, we need to find whatever’s keeping the ghost here. Spirits don’t just float around aimlessly—they latch onto something. The room with the highest activity will tell us where.”

Before Ross could respond, Coach snatched the EMF reader from his hands, gave it a quick wave through the air, then shoved it right back at him. “So start looking.”

Ross gripped the device like it was the last thing tethering him to sanity. “And if we see anything weird, we run, right?”

Coach was already walking toward the house. “We’ll see.”

Ross groaned under his breath, dragging his feet as he followed. He cast a quick glance back at the van, where Brody sat comfortably in the glow of multiple monitors, looking far too at ease. Brody met his eyes and gave the smallest nod, the universal gesture of Better you than me, before taking a sip of his coffee. Ross muttered a curse and hurried after Coach.

Inside, the house felt even heavier than before, like stepping into a thick fog made of pure dread. The silence pressed in on them, each floorboard creak sounding like a gunshot in the stillness. The air was stale, and the deeper they moved, the more Ross felt like something was waiting.

“Keep that reader up,” Coach said, voice lower now, like even he didn’t want to disturb the quiet. “Let’s find this thing.”

They worked their way through the hall and back into the bedroom, where the EMF reader immediately went berserk, beeping erratically in Ross’s hands. He nearly dropped it, cursing as he struggled to adjust his grip. “Oh yeah, real subtle haunting. Totally not obvious at all,” he muttered.

Coach’s flashlight swept across the room, but Ross’s beam found something first—an ornate mirror hanging on the far wall, its gilded frame dulled by dust and age. The glass, however, was pristine. Too pristine. It shimmered unnaturally, the surface rippling like disturbed water.

“There,” Ross said, taking an instinctive step forward. “That’s gotta be it.”

Before he could get any closer, Coach’s hand clamped down on his shoulder, yanking him back with enough force to make him stumble. “Don’t look into it.”

Ross blinked at him. “What? Why not?”

Before Coach could answer, Brody’s voice crackled through the radio. “Uh, guys? That mirror just lit up on the cams. And I don’t mean, like, caught a glare. I mean it glowed. That’s—yeah, that’s not normal.”

Coach gave a firm nod, his grip still locked on Ross. “Because it’s a trap, that’s why. You stare too long, and you’re next.”

A shiver ran down Ross’s spine as he forced himself to look away. “Okay, great. Fantastic. So how do we not end up like Trevor and Chevy?”

Coach exhaled through his nose, fingers tightening ever so slightly. “That’s the part I haven’t figured out yet.”

As if in response, the mirror pulsed, the light within shifting like something beneath the surface was pressing against it. Watching. Waiting. The temperature in the room dropped, and Ross instinctively stepped closer to Coach.

Brody’s voice came through again, quieter this time. “I don’t think it wants you to figure it out.”

Coach’s eyes never left the mirror, his expression set like stone. “Brody, grab the salt and the extra incense from the van. We’ll need them to deal with this.”

The radio crackled with Brody’s immediate response, his voice utterly devoid of hesitation. “Yeah, that’s gonna be a no from me dog. Not stepping one foot out of this van.”

Coach sighed and rubbed his fingers along the bridge of his nose. “Fine. Ross, go get it.”

Ross’s head snapped up. “Wait, why me?”

Coach didn’t even look at him. “Because I’m not leaving this thing alone, and Brody’s apparently cemented to his seat.” He gestured toward the door. “Now move.”

Ross groaned, already backing toward the hallway. “If I get grabbed on the way, I’m haunting both of you.”

Brody’s voice crackled through just as Ross disappeared from sight. “Just don’t screw it up like the incense.”

All Coach heard was Ross scoff as he disappeared down the hall. Without warning the air in the bedroom grew heavier…colder. The dim overhead light flickered softly, casting shadows that seemed to move with a will of their own. He exhaled slowly, gripping the EMF reader tighter, steeling his nerves. He couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong. The silence stretched, heavy and unnatural.

Movement out of the corner of his eye caught his attention and he inadvertently found himself gazing directly into the mirror. Before his own warning was able to ring through his head, he found himself staring at his reflection, unable to place something about it being just slightly…off. It stood rigid, just as he was—but then something shifted, his boots started to darken. The worn leather rippled, smoothing over into something sleek, something glossy. He could only stare as the change spread upward, the fabric of his pants melding into the boots seamlessly, molding around his to his legs tightly.

He closed his eyes and shook his head, it was clear the mirror was playing tricks on him but a warm, almost pleasantly tight feeling spread through his feet and legs. His eyes shot open and he looked down to see his familiar pants and leather boots. A brief, uneasy sigh escaped him at the realization that it really was just a trick, but that as cut short when he felt the tight embrace of ghostly rubber advancing higher still.

His gaze snapped back to the mirror. Wide-eyed, he saw that transformation was progressing with or without him looking into the mirror. The rubber had flowed over his thighs, his waist. Even worse was the sensation was starting in his fingers and hands now too. The skin on his hands darkened next, wrinkles and blemishes smoothing out into a perfect, seamless black rubber.

The tightness continued its spread, pleasure creeping over his skin. He took a deep breath. It was all a trick. If he could get away from the mirror he would be ok. Despite the rubber being confined to the reflection, his body resisted him moving towards the door, almost like it was trying to keep him from fleeing.

The rubbery feeling advanced further and further up his arms and around his waist as he struggled towards the doorway. The creak of rubber filled the room right as he was within reach of the door as it forcibly swung closed, sealing him inside the room. "Because of course that would have been too easy." he whispered to himself.

The pleasant tightness crept over his chest and back now and he couldn't help but feel his steel resolve waver slightly as a moan slipped from him. It felt good…too good. He ran a hand over his chest, feeling his rubber covered hand gliding over his now tight, rubber chest. Another moan slipped free as it slid down his slick abdomen, lower and lower until….

The sound of screaking latex pulled him from his daze, and his attention back to the mirror. The mirror that now reflected his now almost entirely rubber covered body, now just his head uncovered standing near the supernaturally locked door to the bedroom staring back at him. He could feel the tight rubber around him and couldn't deny how good he looked with it reflecting in the dim lighting.

A shimmer in the reflection drew his attention and in an instant he saw that there was dark black rubber gasmask gripped tightly in his hands. Coach's breath quickened as he stared at the gas mask in his hands. He didn't remember picking it up, yet there it was—its glossy black surface gleaming under the dim light. His fingers gripped the material tightly. A cold dread settled in his stomach as he looked down at himself, and the air in his lungs escaped in a sharp gasp. The transformation wasn’t just in the mirror anymore. The snug embrace of rubber was real, sealing him in from the neck down, hugging every muscle in a perfectly sculpted sheen. His boots, his pants, his jacket—gone. All replaced by the seamless, inescapable rubber.

He staggered back, hands trembling, but the suit held firm. It felt right, perfect, but his mind rebelled against the unnatural sensation. His fingers twitched against the mask, a thought creeping into his mind…to put it on. The thought sent a jolt of panic through him, and he clenched his jaw, willing himself to drop the mask. But his body refused.

The warmth pulsed again, curling up his arms, across his chest. His reflection had changed even more now, fully coated in gleaming rubber from the neck down. He could only stare at it—at himself. His stance had shifted, straighter, more rigid. His body looked powerful, sculpted beneath the smooth surface.

The mirror pulsed again, the reflection tilting its head—not in mimicry, but in observation, as if watching him struggle. Coach’s fingers twitched, still wrapped around the gas mask, and his breath quickened as he tried—tried—to let go. But his body refused. The smooth rubber encasing him hummed, the tightness sinking deeper into his muscles, his bones. His reflection lifted the mask to its face, and his own arms obeyed, bringing it closer, the scent of rubber filling his senses. He clenched his jaw, resisting, but the moment the edges of the mask touched his skin, a warm, tingling pressure surged through his head. A sharp gasp escaped his lips as the material moved, creeping over his head and sealing itself around him entirely.

It was like a second skin sliding into place, fusing with the rest of the suit, cutting off any trace of his bare flesh. The rubber tightened around him, molding to him, smoothing away any last sign of individuality. His breath came hot and heavy through the built-in filters, the soft hiss of air cycling in and out setting a steady, controlled rhythm. His thoughts swam, his resistance fading beneath the suffocating pleasure of the suit’s embrace. The pleasant tightness wasn’t just external anymore—it was in his mind, sinking deeper, soothing, silencing. His name, his purpose, his will—distant echoes swallowed by the rubber. He belonged this way. He had always belonged this way.

The mirror pulsed one final time, and the lenses of the mask darkened. No hesitation, no lingering defiance. The figure in the reflection straightened, standing tall, motionless, obedient. The struggle was over. There was nothing left to fight. Just the silent, perfect stillness of black rubber.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Do you want to join? Contact our recruiters: @brodygold , @goldenherc9, or @polo-drone-001.”

[your-greatest-queen]

One of my biggest hater moments in middle school was when my 4th grade teacher had us play Just Dance every day to get us to loosen up and get refocused and every day we would do 1-4 dances before going back to work. She let us pick the songs and I waited WEEKS for my turn to pick a song and I was SO excited to eventually choose Michael Jackson's Ghost of Jealousy.

Finally my turn came and I happily told my teacher my choice and she put it on. And then, she turned it off 30 seconds in because, and y'all will never believe this, the 9 year olds were not vibing with it. And I literally have never recovered from that betrayal

[jutsomethoughtsihave]

sometimes i consider making silly little posts being sad about no content but then i remember the last time i thought of doing that it turned out phil was in the hospital because of ass

[orionadrien]

feeling normal (lying) (gay) (dilf lover) (reluctantly coming to terms with the fact that pirate tales are typically tragedies)

[abirddogmoment]

An excerpt from training for directed retrieves during my coffee break!

Directed retrieves are a really fun gundog exercise where a dog fetches multiple birds or bumpers in a sequence that you (the handler) ask. They can be marked retrieves (where the dog sees where the bumper fell) or blind retrieves (where the dog doesn't see the fall and you have to guide them with your voice and hands). I'm teaching this mostly as an enrichment activity, but it's an important piece for irl hunting retrievers to ensure birds aren't wasted in the field. I started teaching this exercise by throwing kibble in two different directions while she stood in a heel and then releasing her to them one at a time. This was our first try with directed retrieving of bumpers!

In this video I'm asking Rory to get into heel position (and rewarding that heavily because heel position = best place to be), asking her to stand steady while I throw two bumpers, and then directing her to pick up the first bumper I threw.

The duck bumper (the second one) is her preferred bumper so I chose to throw the paint roller to my left - when I put my hand out to line her up, it sort of blocks her view of the duck bumper so she's more likely to go to the one I want even though she likes the other one better.

Because this was the first time we practiced this exercise with bumpers, I wasn't looking for a perfect retrieve to hand - when I sent her to the duck bumper (not in the video), she dropped it at my feet instead of waiting for me to take it. That's no big deal, we can work towards a tighter retrieve after she gets more confident with the game.

We're going to keep practicing indoors for a while and once she's looking confident (and assuming things don't get too icy) we'll start working outside so we can build distance and speed.

I will also keep practicing lining her up (using my hand to guide her line) so we can start working on send-outs for blind retrieves and commitment to running out in a straight line! I have some ideas on how to use very small pieces of food to start this indoors and then we can move it outdoors in the spring.

She's doing awesome though! I'm really happy with her steadiness and her ability to think through puzzles. It's gonna be a fun winter working on these skills!

[ratatatastic]

have you ever felt more tightly held back tension than ekky patiently waiting for his turn to congratulate forsy on his ot goal

and then doing the chest bumpies...

[caruliaa]

do you ever listen to a song you used to relate to someone and go what the fuck was wrong with me

[e77y]

I am addicted to internship applications

[prettydumbmutt]

.post hookup yapping in tags.

[siilverfang]

quick wip!