#‘i was you know touched in the head’ !!!!!!!!!!!

[ministarfruit]

lucky star because I was feeling nostalgic

[crabsnpersimmons]

a little wip for a little thing i'm working on!

[cordspaghetti]

thinking about um joan gerard

[strangersteddierthings]

The thing is, Steve has learned, that becoming untouchable isn't all he wants it to be.

People were too quick to try and reach out for him, ask for more than he was willing to give. He hadn't wanted to give up his first kiss to some random girl at some random boy's twelfth birthday party because of spin the bottle. He hadn't wanted to play Seven Minutes in Heaven with Jenny Jackson or Linda Simons at Tommy's birthday party the following year. He did want to take Mary Linscott to Snow Ball, but she just wanted to make out behind the bleachers instead of dance with him. He didn't want to do that but then Brian called him stupid for not wanting to, and asked if he was queer. So, Steve had turned right back around and dragged Mary back under the bleachers, kissing her until it was time to go to prove Brian wrong.

(Even though Steve knows Brian isn't wrong. That Steve had wanted to ask Brian to the dance as much as he'd wanted to ask Mary but knew better than to do that. He saw how they treated Eddie Munson last year for the suspicion of liking other boys and Steve wasn't going to let that happen to himself.)

Brian had congratulated him after and asked what base he got to. Steve didn't want to get to any bases, but he couldn't say that, so he just punched Brian in the arm and said 'more bases than you' which was true because Brian's date didn't kiss him even once.

Then Carol Perkins approached him at lunch, shortly after Snow Ball, and asked if Steve would be her first kiss. Not because she wanted to kiss Steve, but because she wanted to kiss Tommy H, but didn't want to be bad at kissing. Steve agreed because he liked Carol. Not in the way she liked Tommy, but mostly because she'd asked.

No one had done that yet.

She came over to his house on a Saturday because she didn't want Tommy to catch them and think she didn't like him. They made out in his room because, despite his parents being home, they didn't really care who was in his room with him or if the door was open or shut. Probably didn't even notice he had someone over. She leaves an hour later.

By Tuesday Tommy and Carol are an item and by Friday they were Steve's best friends.

However, for reasons Steve doesn't understand, more girls keep asking him to be their first kiss. And maybe it's because he's already got a reputation, or maybe Carol let slip he'd said yes when she asked, but Steve finds himself kissing a lot of girls he doesn't want to. He doesn't know how to say no. Can't find a reason too. Brian's words play in the back of his mind every time he thinks about saying no.

(Are you stupid? Are you queer? He doesn't want to be either of those things, and given his grade in biology and pre-algebra, he's really only got a hope of avoiding the queer label. His father would tolerate a stupid son. He doesn't think he'd survive if his father had a queer one.)

There are a few girls he's been crushing on that ask him and that was nice. One, Alice Baker, even becomes his girlfriend for a month. His first relationship.

Soon eighth grade gives way to being a freshman and Steve, who has always been handsome and cute, catches the eye of upperclassmen now.

And Steve's not sure how it happens, but he ends up moving past first base with another girl whose name he can't remember, or possibly never knew. He doesn't remember asking her for hers when she led him into one of the bedrooms at the house this party was at while he was way too tipsy.

And then it just grows. The reputation and what people expect from him, and he doesn't want it, but he's never said no before so can he start now? Doesn't he need a reason to say no? If he doesn't have a reason, does that make him queer? He should be wanting this. What boy doesn't want this?

And maybe he does want it. But not like this.

He doesn't want to be slightly drunk at yet another party, following the first girl that grabs his wrist and pulls him after her into whatever secluded area they can find. He doesn't want to keep saying yes when he wants to say no.

The summer between freshman and sophomore year he confides in Carol. It's a risk. Carol can be cruel, quick with her words to tear you down, to spread the rumor that will ruin your life. But she's also fiercely loyal.

He tells her he's tired of kissing people he doesn't want to.

Carol is quiet for a long time, and Steve almost thinks he's made a mistake. But then she speaks.

"Okay. Let's make a plan."

And they do. Then suddenly Steve is untouchable. Carol teaches him how to see the weakness in people and call it out. How to wield his facial expressions as a weapon and a shield. How to put on the air of being the most important person everywhere you go so well that everyone else begins to believe it. How to fall back on the fact his parents are rich, gone often, and, almost most importantly, well known in the community. It gives Steve's name a weight to throw around.

More importantly, all of that culminates in people no longer asking things of him. Instead, they look to him to take the lead, they wait to be asked. It makes Steve feel in charge of his life for once.

But now.

Now, years later, having survived a spring break from Hell and averted the apocalypse, Steve watches Eddie hang off Argyle with ease, fling an arm over Jonathan's shoulder while laughing at a joke, easily pull Dustin into a headlock or wrestling match.

Easy touches that Steve should be able to do, too. A jealousy wells inside him almost as much as the unease he feels in his stomach at the mere thought of letting them know they're allowed to reach out and touch him, too. That Eddie's allowed to reach out and touch.

But then he remembers what happened when he let people have that power over him and he can't bring himself to do it.

It settles in Steve, then, the realization. When you become untouchable, you're unable to touch.

-

@nburkhardt @i-less-than-three-you adding my own lil bit of angst into the mix now (:

[vaggieslefteye]

HUSK, Hotel Bartender & Concierge | 1x04 - Masquerade

"Oh, I FORGOT — you're the wise-old bartender who's seen it all! Get the fuck over yourself and pour me a real drink."

[cardo-de-comer]

Hey! The way you drew Mr. Qi makes me feral, thank you. I love that man in a way one would love their neighborhood cat. Mysterious, I wish to know more of where he comes from, who he is, yet it's better to be kept secret. Again, thank you for drawing him in such a nice way, loved it, will continue to love it, and once I've sent this ask, I shall continue to stare at it like the feral animal I am over that man. Thank you.

thank you anon! <3 i miss him lots lately so here's some sketches

[bogkeep]

mannnnnn now that i've actually started medical transition it seems that i will, hopefully, someday, get through to the other side of the limbo tunnel and can hopefully explore more permanent masculine attire. which is as exciting as it is daunting. like, i'm under no illusions that there's a tangible cutoff point where i will Suddenly be out of the limbo state (though top surgery will certainly help if i can get it), and there's no one thing holding me back from exploring this space *now*, but it's. Difficult ,

the List of challenges i must navigate:

- men's fashion is on a surface level very sad and boring and i crave whimsy :( i know knowledge and experience will help but it's like playing on hard mode compared to being a Weird Girl (tm). i am currently gnc against my will and i desire to be gnc Intentionally and on my own terms

- hashtag short king problems. masculine attire was never made with me in mind. almost every time i observe an aspirational example of Men's Fashion it's on a tall lanky guy and that will never be me and that's okay but throw me a bone pleas

- the Autism Sensibilities. collars too close to the neck depletes me of HP. wearing accessories for too long depletes me of mana. if a button up is made of a slightly too stiff material it will give me rashes. i cannot wear binders because i value my ability to breathe comfortably. i can only do so many layers at once before i hit a game over screen. i MUST be comforble

- the restrictions of my circumstances, such as the safety rules of the watchmaker workshop or the mercy of scandinavian weather gods

i'm sure i will figure things out with time. i'm going to need patience. i'm probably going to have to learn how to tailor trousers. i will need to Observe how others dress. but it's so much!! ahh!!!!

[rainybyday]

I like to think Hatake's sees hair as a sort of sign of affection. Like, anything with hair is a sign of affection to them.

Head pats, fondness. Brushing hair, close relationship. Doing your hair, you are their closest person.

Like, they see playing or caring for your hair as a sign of affection through caring for you.

To touch your hair is like a cautious sign of fondness to see the person's reaction to the touch. If they are positive they keep doing it until they can card their fingers through your hair. If you respond negatively they would be slower and respectfully of your space and ask you if it's fine to pat your hair or hover a hand over your head before you lean into it.

Playing with one's hair means that they are putting trust in the person that they won't ruin it nor that you will damage it. A show of trust that Hatakes take to see if they have any form of malice or tension based on the person who is playing with their hair seems to care for them. If they pull or tug harshly and keep doing it then it means you don't care for their well being. But if you apologize and learn to be more gentle then it shows that you are being considerate of the person.

Styling or doing one's hair is like the ultimate show of claim a Hatake can make on a person, letting someone touch or do their hair is the second stage of trust before they do it themselves to the person they care for. Because then it shows that you are allowing them to care for you and love you in a personal way. To let a Hatake do your hair, whether that's brushing it or doing a complicated style is a show of a claim or sorts.

Of course, a Hatake will judge you by how well they care for your hair. The best hair care is usually shiny or silky, even fluffy or soft on the claimed, and a well-cared-for Hatake can be seen in the same way.

I just thought of this as Kakashi doing Sakumos hair a lot into a simple ponytail since that was the only style he learned to do correctly and Sakumo always loved it. But when the mission happened and Kakashi was coming home less, Sakumo's hair became loose and unkept which he took as a sign his pack didn't care for him nor trust him anymore.

I imagine Kakashi seeing Sakumos body with his silver hair spread all over the floor when Sakumo cut chunks of it off before killing himself. The person who found Kakashi and Sakumo saw Kakashi brushing out the tangles of the messily cut hair on his dads dead body.

Then I like to think of how Kakashi would pat his student's heads from time to time and I smile.

If we go the Hatake Tobirama and Hashirama route I like to think Hashirama always had his long soft and shiny hair due to Tobi brushing it daily. Even styles it for important events or for practices. Tobirama use to have long hair to but saw how much his brother struggled with it so he cut it short to help him with caring for it. Hashirama was devastated and felt guilty so he would work to make plant oils like rosemary lavender or coconut and almond oils to make his brothers hair shiny and smooth.

Anyways, hair care! Hair care the love language.

[lovesickeros]

now that natlan is out it's tsaritsa yearning hours again because i am one nation closer to either being horribly disappointed or foaming at the mouth!

creator!reader w a little side of conflicted tsaritsa is such good food I can't not yap about it. a woman who has dedicated so much of her life to severing herself from "love" of all kinds and succeeding and. just being so confident that when she meets you she's bitter and angry and mean. because she can't stand you. she isn't supposed to love yet you worm your way into her heart anyway and you don't even know it.

especially in smth like an imposter au. she tells herself your just a tool for her to use but your treated like the Divine you really are, pampered and spoiled every step. tells herself it means nothing when she indulges you – let's you hold her hand in private, eventually let's you move aside the veil, just a little.

and she hates it. hates how easy it is to let you break down the ice she's built up for years.

all you do is smile and she feels like she can't breathe. because despite how violently she rejects love in all aspects, it always bleeds through eventually. she despises it but the way you brush your thumbs over her cheeks makes her bitter and warm and it infuriates her to no end.

she hates you and she loves you and she can't stand you and if you were ever taken from her she'd destroy every inch of teyvat if she had to go get you back.

and ironically enough I think she'd also be the one to initiate any first kiss. maybe she's still trying to convince herself it's just a fluke and itll make her realize it meant nothing, it means nothing. desperate to fix whatever you've done to her and instead it just makes it worse.

a horrible mess of a woman who gave up on love just to be confronted with it when she finally accepted it's absence.

[inexplicably-spookified]

Lea… do you remember what a clear sky looks like at night?

Out in the countryside, no town or city nearby?

I hope one day you will…

[vani-ash]

What if Damon can't see/ there's something with his eye sight and this isn't like him being crazy and trying to choke Anawin what if these are all just him tying to see what Anawin looks like/feels like?

[sandflakedraws]

Hey y'all, happy friday! It's formal update time for The Touch of Sunlight Kickstarter ^^/

I wanted to take a moment and better showcase the treats you've all unlocked~ (no more 175 pixel previews) Featured above, we have the updated book cover, which will be hard cover this time! Everybody who backed for the book will get this sturdier version, no paperbacks. And, oh goody-

-it shinessss. It will have some pleasing gold foil for framing.

Next we've got the mini print, this time with rose gold foil. I'm particularly delighted about this one, as I'd had it as an old print idea back when I was first making the story in 2020. It's nice that I got to revisit it for this and really polish it up ^///^

After that, we've got one of the more popular items in fan merch these days: an enamel pin!! For this, I went for something different. Some moon flowers and implied harp notes make for a subtler reference to ttos.

And lastly, we've just unlocked a bookmark! For this one, we've got Nulo on their well chair(with accompanying thread), so you can make them descend and ascend from any story of your choosing.

Or, swing them around like a bola. I won't judge.

If you decide to back for a physical book or higher, all of this comes for free!! As well as a pdf featuring some concept art and a bit of my original, janky notes for this story.

So to say it again, with feeling - thank you all so much for your support. This is going to go a long way to helping me make more stories like this.

the kickstarter will run until may 28th

[turtleblogatlast]

I’ve gone on and on about how Leo wants to be who Splinter finds is the ideal person (which just so happens to be Splinter’s ideal version of himself) but I have yet to really touch upon how Donnie is the one who most directly parallels Splinter himself to an honestly shocking degree, Raph’s taking from Splinter’s teachings and parenting has resulted in an unhealthy mixup in the different dynamics of a family versus a team, and Mikey is the one who is simultaneously the most focused on family and the most intrinsically himself which both leads to his better grasp of mystics and honestly what just might be the healthiest dynamic with Splinter.

[suguwu]

when aventurine masturbates—which he doesn't do often—he doesn't really think of anything. he just gets himself off with quick, almost perfunctory strokes. a means to an end.

then he meets you.

he still doesn't get himself off often, but there's a difference the next time he does. suddenly, you drift through his mind, and his strokes slow to something a little sweeter, a little more luxurious. he leans into the pleasure; lets it spark beneath his skin, kindling to flames. it's only for a moment, just a breath of indulgence, before he banishes the thought.

the time after that, though, he thinks of your tongue, wet and pink as it peeks out between your lips. he pushes into his own touch, his back arcing like a cathedral nave of muscle and bone. imagines that the pad of his thumb, wet with pre-cum, is the tip of your tongue lapping at his slit.

he cums hard.

after, he leans back into the opulence of his bed and stares at the ceiling. there's still pleasure dancing along his nerves, the quiet reverberation of a plucked string. he thinks of you curled up next to him, sweat glimmering on your skin like ocean spray, and rolls over with a groan.

you're going to ruin him.

[purgetrooperfox]

[taps mic] Ghost's touch starvation and repression vs Roach's mindless casual touches. Ghost swinging from gritting his teeth to so used to shoulder brushes and knee bumps and taps/pats/slaps for attention. craving them even. Roach not expecting Ghost to ever be touchy, besides the occasional very hard slap on the back or medical/tactical necessity, happy enough that he doesn't object to contact. then freezes up when one day Ghost Squeezes His Shoulder ("good work today"). then one day Holds His Hand briefly after pulling him to his feet ("give 'em hell, bug"). then one day Touches His Face ("you got a little something... just here"). who wins in the end

or: Ghost falls first and Roach takes a hot minute to figure it out then falls With Force

[dj-wayback]

Nwb i think Sep is just... trying too hard to figure out how to get along with you (which makes it 100% more awkward)

Welp……….now it’s definitely awkward. hah