#‘ she’ll never be the same no matter how much she wants to be ’
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demigod-shenanigans · 3 days ago
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Okay but. Hear me out. Platonic m/f soulmates specifically in a heteronormative society.
Soulmates are understood to primarily be a romantic thing by society, because they’re meant to be the most important person in your life, and a lot of the time that person is your partner, but not always.
Reyna who grows up with Jason’s name on her wrist. Who gets through her shitty childhood partially through thinking one day she’ll meet her soulmate and he will love her and things will get better
And then she does meet him and he does love her, but it’s not how she expected it to be. He loves her, but it doesn’t seem to be in the same way she loves him.
And then even the goddess of love tells her she’ll never find love with her soulmate, and Reyna can’t help but wonder if she’s fundamentally broken in some way.
Jason who grows up just wanting to be loved, no matter in what way. Who has Reyna’s name on his wrist and is delighted when he meets her and knows they were meant to be friends. But he’s not sure he loves her in the way he’s supposed to. And he’s overjoyed that he has her, but sometimes he feels sad, because maybe that means there’s something wrong with him.
Leo and Piper who grow up with each other’s names on their wrists. Who find out during the meteor shower and kiss exactly once only for them both to immediately realize this feels off, but if that means they’re broken somehow, at least they can be broken together.
But then something shifts. Hera mixes up their memories and they no longer remember. Leo is stuck thinking his soulmate has a boyfriend, and maybe he’s one of the unlucky few people who is soulmates with someone that has a different soulmate. But then he looks at Jason and Piper together. And sure, he jealous, but it’s not Piper he wants to kiss, and he’s so confused. She’s the one who’s meant to be his soulmate. So then why does he think about what it would be like to brush his fingers through Jason’s hair?
Piper who doesn’t properly remember wilderness school but does realize her love for Leo isn’t what it’s supposed to be. She loves him so much, but she’s not in love with him like she should be. But surely Hera and her mom put her with Jason for a reason. Maybe there was a mistake with her tattoo. Maybe she was supposed to have Jason’s name written on her wrist. Maybe she’s not broken.
Except Jason’s tattoo says Reyna. And it’s clear that he misses whoever Reyna is. He says he doesn’t think he liked her like that, but she’s his soulmate, so surely he does. The name is burnt into Piper’s mind before they ever meet.
And when they do, she wants to hate Reyna. Wants to hate her for what it will mean for her relationship with Jason that Reyna exists. Wants to hate her for being proof that there is something fundamentally wrong with Piper.
But Reyna is beautiful and strong and a natural leader. Jason is lucky to have a soulmate that awesome. (And sometimes Piper kind of wishes Reyna was her soulmate instead of Jason’s.)
Reyna who wants to hate Piper because she’s the girlfriend of the guy who was supposed to be her soulmate. Who might be the reason Aphrodite looked at her and said she wouldn’t find love where she wanted or expected. But Piper is gorgeous and brave and stubborn, and Reyna doesn’t hate her. Sometimes she thinks it might be the opposite. Sometimes she wonders if that’s what her prophecy meant.
Jason who is loved in so many different ways after a lifetime’s worth of feeling unloved. Who is so confused how romantic love is supposed to feel in comparison to platonic love. Who loved Reyna and Piper but never like he was supposed to.
Who holds Leo in his arms and wonders if that’s what home feels like.
It’s Leo who figures it out eventually. He’s venting to Hazel about the whole situation after the incident with Nemesis and Hazel looks at him dumbfounded because “what gave you the idea soulmates had to be romantic??”
“Please tell me one example where it isn’t. You can’t.”
And Hazel just stares at him, then slowly rolls up her sleeve to show Leo the name on her wrist is literally her brother’s (which makes a lot of sense because obviously without Nico she wouldn’t even be alive right now. He changed her life in a way no one else could have)
And. Yeah. That one is kind of hard to argue with
And there’s nothing wrong with the way any of them love each other. They’re not what society expects soulmates to look like. But they’re all so very loved, and being loved platonically isn’t less valuable than being loved romantically just because it’s different. It’s not what they expected looking at the names on their wrists for the first time. But it’s still love, and maybe that’s the only thing that matters.
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quietlyblooms · 8 hours ago
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ummm someone help me think of a legitimate villain/criminal/etc au or an au in which chiyo’s changed and hardened bc i’ve listened to that loop of “when does a man become a monster?” from epic one too many times and i need to write some tragedy i fear
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halfmoonaria · 6 days ago
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what i can’t say
pairing: tara carpenter & female reader
summary: tara wants the only person she can’t have, but she’ll do whatever it takes to change that —even if it means risking everything.
word count: 10.7k
author’s note: yall don’t forget to wish me a happy birthday this friday on the 22nd!
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Tara wasn't used to hearing the word "no."
Growing up, she'd mastered the art of getting exactly what she wanted, whether it was a toy, a treat, or just a little more attention.
All it took was a well-timed look, a hint of a pout, or a small scene in a public place—not that she ever felt bad about it. After all, it always worked, and it always felt worth it.
But more than any toy or treat, Tara always seemed to have what she wanted most: you.
Her best friend since... well, since you both were small enough to think scraped knees were the end of the world. You'd been there from the start, the friend who laughed with her, who stood by her through every phase and whim.
Tara didn't have to beg or throw a fit to keep you close. You just were. It was like you were woven into each other's lives, and if anyone asked, she'd say you'd always be there—like you were something she'd managed to keep just for herself.
If anyone asked, Tara couldn't quite recall a time before you.
You were there in every memory that mattered, the friend who understood her quirks, finished her sentences, and knew every dream she'd ever had.
You were inseparable, not just in the way kids cling to each other, but in the way people do when they know they'll never quite find someone who gets them like this again.
You shared everything with your clothes, midnight snacks, and every embarrassing crush you'd ever had.
You laughed together about the silly things you thought were love back then, sharing conversations about who you'd marry someday and who had the best smile.
Although. Tara was always a little quieter during these talks, listening more than sharing, and you never thought much of it. That was just Tara, after all, always keeping a bit of herself back, tucked away in her own mind.
But when it came to your middle school crush, she never missed a chance to tease you, brushing him off as if he wasn't as special as you seemed to think.
She'd laugh and tell you he wasn't as funny as you made him out to be, or that his smile really wasn't anything to write home about.
To you, it was just typical Tara, always finding a way to poke holes in the things you liked.
You didn't notice how her smile faltered when you gushed over him or how her gaze turned a little sharper, though even she didn't fully understand why.
It left her with an uneasy feeling, the kind she could never quite explain, that made her want to change the subject whenever she could.
And as time passed during this time, it seemed like your crush only grew, and so did the way you talked about him.
No matter how many times Tara brushed off your comments or tried to steer the conversation elsewhere, you still lit up whenever his name came up.
Brian.
Brian slipped into conversations almost daily, whether it was about the way he made everyone laugh in class or how he'd held the door for you that morning. And each time you brought him up, Tara felt a pang of irritation she couldn't quite explain.
She never told you how much she despised Brian, but the feeling ran deep. It gnawed at her whenever you mentioned him, and even though she tried to brush it off, she found herself disliking him more and more.
The worst part was, she couldn't understand why. It wasn't like you weren't allowed to like a boy—that was just part of life, after all.
Whenever she hinted at her frustration with her mom, she'd hear the same thing: it was normal, fun even, to have a crush, and Tara would experience it too someday.
But she hadn't. She'd never felt that way about any boy in your grade, no matter how many times she tried to convince herself she should.
It confused her, and in a way, it confused you too. You'd always laughed off the fact that Tara never seemed to "crush" the way you did, teasing her about how she'd figure it out someday.
But whenever you'd gush over Brian, Tara would just sit quietly, trying to ignore the strange knot in her stomach that seemed to tighten with every word you said.
Time went on, and those middle school crushes never quite faded.
Brian only seemed to grow more attractive, transitioning from the shy boy you liked to someone who was effortlessly charming, with a confidence that made everyone notice him.
Back then, you'd have called him "cute," but now, there were new words—hot, gorgeous—terms that made Tara roll her eyes every time they left your mouth.
But you still felt that rush of excitement when he was around, that same giddiness you'd had since you were ten, only now it felt a little more real.
Tara, on the other hand, hadn't changed much when it came to relationships.
While others around you both dated, broke up, and fell in love, she stayed quietly distant, brushing off questions and teasing about why she never seemed interested in anyone.
The truth was, she didn't really know why herself. There was a part of her that felt left out when you gushed about Brian, when your other friends talked about crushes or brought dates to dances. She tried to tell herself that she just wasn't interested yet, that maybe someday she'd feel what everyone else seemed to.
But as the years went by, Tara started to realize that maybe she was different—and she couldn't shake the strange sense of frustration that came with that realization, especially whenever Brian was mentioned.
Somewhere along the way, as high school turned into something more serious, so did her thoughts about you.
Tara didn't want to admit it at first—not to herself, not to anyone. The idea crept up quietly, unexpected and unwanted, like some shadow she couldn't shake.
The way you'd laugh at something silly, the familiar warmth of your hand in hers, or the way her heart would skip when you'd throw an arm around her shoulders. It all made sense now, but it was a sense she desperately didn't want.
When the realization hit her, it was like she couldn't breathe.
There was this tiny voice in her mind that whispered, almost cruelly, You're in love with her. Tara's immediate reaction was to shut it down, to deny it with everything she had. This couldn't be right. She wasn't in love with you.
That wasn't what best friends did. She told herself she was just confused, that maybe it was normal to feel this strongly about someone you'd known your entire life.
But every time she saw you look at Brian—every time you said his name with that sparkle in your eyes—it felt like a punch to the gut, and there was no denying it anymore.
The more she tried to reason with herself, the clearer it became. And that terrified her.
She couldn't let herself feel this way about you. You were her best friend, the person who knew her better than anyone else.
The idea of telling you—of you finding out and looking at her with pity, or worse, disgust—made her stomach twist. She could already imagine the awkward smile, the way you might back away, laugh it off, or even leave her behind. It would shatter her, and she knew that.
And so, she decided then and there that this secret would stay with her.
She'd lock it away, bury it so deep that even she could forget about it someday. Telling anyone—even her parents—wasn't an option.
Not only did she fear their reaction, but she knew they wouldn't understand. To them, you were her friend, nothing more, and the thought of losing you, or of anyone making her feel like her love was wrong, was enough to keep her quiet.
But keeping quiet wasn't easy. The secret felt like it was burning a hole through her, consuming her thoughts and leaving her frustrated in ways she couldn't explain.
She wanted to be around you, but every moment with you felt like a reminder of what she could never have, and it only made the ache grow stronger.
She was angry, scared, and hopelessly in love with the one person she could never tell.
So she became skilled at hiding the depth of her feelings, putting on a mask that had somehow become part of her daily life.
She played her role well, acting like nothing had changed between you both.
At school, she kept her gaze casual, listening to you talk as if she didn't want to lose herself in the way your lips moved.
During sleepovers, she'd lie next to you, forcing herself to focus on anything but the warmth of your arm just inches from hers.
And at parties, now that you were both old enough to go, she'd laugh and dance alongside you, all while pretending her stomach wasn't in knots from the way you looked at her under dim lights, a playful grin lighting up your face.
It was like living with a constant tug-of-war inside her, balancing between wanting to be near you and needing to keep her heart steady.
She'd perfected the art of nonchalance, even when you made it nearly impossible. When you got excited about something—eyes wide, laughing about some small victory—Tara would have to swallow down the urge to reach out, to brush a strand of hair from your face or lean in just a little closer.
The hardest moments were the little things, the 'normal' things, like when you'd give her an easy, carefree compliment, your eyes warm and sincere.
She'd feel the blush rise to her cheeks, and she'd quickly look away or laugh it off, hoping you didn't notice the way her voice wavered.
And when you held her hands, like you always did, squeezing them to give her a little boost of courage, she'd act as though it didn't send her heart racing, as though she wasn't fighting the impulse to hold on tighter.
Every smile you threw her way, every moment you lingered too close, she had to act like it didn't make her insides flip.
She trained herself to respond with that same easy smile, to pretend she didn't feel like the air had been knocked out of her whenever you looked at her like she was the only one in the room.
It was a constant game of pretending, a battle against herself that she had to win every single day.
And as much as she tried to hide it, each touch, each laugh, each simple, familiar look left her more tangled in her own emotions.
She tried to tell herself that these things were just... normal. Friends did these things all the time, she told herself, even if everything in her felt far from normal.
But no matter how many times she told herself that, her resolve was starting to crack. She couldn't help but notice her jealousy flare up when she saw you talking to other people, especially Brian.
Then, one Tuesday at lunch, you dropped a bombshell that flipped her world just a bit more.
She leaned back, half-focused on your conversation with the others at the table, when she saw you walking toward her with a grin so bright it felt like it could light up the whole room.
Tara felt her heart jump at the sight, her thoughts immediately swept into the excitement that was clearly radiating off of you.
You barely took your seat before bursting with excitement. "Tara!"
Tara's smile matched yours, though a part of her already felt a small pang of unease. But she pushed it aside and leaned in eagerly, mirroring your excitement. "What happened?"
You practically glowed as you told her, "He sat next to me in class today." Tara's chest tightened, but she held her expression steady, keeping that casual, easy smile.
She already knew who you meant—you didn't even have to say his name. It was in the way your voice softened, how your eyes sparkled with excitement she rarely saw except when you were really, really happy.
She couldn't stand the sight of it. Seeing you so... in love, so giddy, felt like a punch she wasn't ready for.
You practically glowed, your whole personality seeming to shift as if you were that younger version of yourself again, like back in middle school when every new crush filled you with wide-eyed excitement.
Except now, it wasn't an innocent schoolgirl crush; it was real, and you were already slipping further from her reach with each passing second.
Tara kept smiling, but inside, every bit of her was tangled up in knots.
You'd never look at her like that. Never talk about her with that bubbly, uncontainable happiness. The thought clawed at her, a reminder she could never push away.
She was your best friend, sure, but she'd never be the person who made your cheeks flush or your heart race. And somehow, knowing that made it even harder to keep that same easy smile on her face.
"And?" she asked, hoping her voice didn't betray her, even as she felt a knot forming. She listened as you recounted every word, every laugh you'd shared with him in that class.
Then you dropped the real news, your eyes sparkling. Your grin only widened. "And then, right before class ended, he asked me to go with him to that party next weekend."
Tara's heart sank, yet she barely let the smile slip. She forced herself to open her mouth in surprise, eyes wide, like she was just as thrilled as you were. "Really?" she said, trying to sound as shocked and happy as you seemed, her voice just a bit too bright. "Did you... did you say yes?"
Of course you did. Tara felt stupid for even considering asking you that question.
But you didn't seem to mind, you just nodded eagerly, your whole face lighting up. "Obviously!"
"Oh, wow. That's... that's great, actually," she said, her voice a little too steady, but it was the best she could manage.
Inside, though, she was unraveling. You were actually going with him. It shouldn't have been such a shock—after all, this was what you wanted, right?
But knowing that you'd be there, dressed up, all smiles and laughter... with him... felt like a lead weight sinking in her chest.
She could already picture it, the two of you in some dimly lit room with music thumping, Ethan leaning in close to say something to make you laugh, you smiling up at him like he was the only person in the world.
The thought of it made her throat tighten, her mind racing with feelings she didn't even want to name.
"Are you excited?" she asked, her voice coming out just barely above a whisper. She hoped you wouldn't notice how strained it sounded, how much effort it took just to ask.
You nodded, your smile impossibly bright. "Yeah, I mean... I didn't think he even noticed me like that, you know? But now... maybe he does."
The way you said it—hopeful, almost in disbelief—cut deeper than she wanted to admit. Maybe he does. Those three words stayed in her head, echoing louder with each second.
She was supposed to be happy for you, and maybe part of her was, but mostly, she just felt hollow.
Because even though you'd never know it, she'd been looking at you the way you were looking at him, longing for that same chance to mean something more to you. And now she was faced with the awful reality that she might never get that chance.
Swallowing down the bitterness, she forced a tight-lipped smile. "You'll have a great time, I'm sure."
But even as she said it, a part of her was already wondering if she'd do something she'd regret. The thought of watching you fall for someone else—someone who wasn't her—was more than she could stand.
And as much as she hated to admit it, she knew she'd do almost anything to keep you from slipping away.
Your eyes brightened again. "You should come with us!"
Tara's heart twisted at the invitation, feeling both flattered and devastated. Of course you'd want her there, being the good friend you were—unaware of what it did to her to see you light up over someone else.
Forcing herself to stay casual, she shrugged, managing a small playful smirk. "I'm not exactly great at third-wheeling."
Her voice sounded steady enough, but inside, it felt like she was clinging to the last threads of composure.
She couldn't stand the thought of watching you fall for him right in front of her, yet the idea of saying no, of letting you go without her... that hurt, too.
Maybe if she was there, she could stop whatever was beginning to grow between you and him. Just maybe, she thought, she'd find a way to keep you by her side, where you'd always belonged.
Her mind spun, the smile on her face frozen, all she could focus on was the sinking realization that she might actually lose you.
Until now, she'd convinced herself that her feelings for you were something she could handle, something she'd eventually learn to live with. But now, with Brian's name hanging between you, that quiet acceptance shattered.
She could see the way this might unfold, each painful step already clear in her mind.
She'd watched enough romance movies to know how these things went, and as much as she wanted to push the thoughts away, they crept in, vivid and unrelenting.
First, you'd go to the party together, and maybe he'd make you laugh so much that you'd find yourself leaning in, your hand brushing his.
She could already picture the two of you on future dates—sharing secrets over a quiet dinner or standing too close on some sidewalk, your face lit up in a way that made her stomach twist with envy.
And worse, she could imagine what might happen after those dates, how one day soon he'd reach for your hand, and you wouldn't hesitate to hold his back.
She didn't want to picture it, but the thought seeped into her mind anyway, filling her with a fierce, unfamiliar ache.
The image of you wrapped up in his arms, whispering into his ear, or—even worse—laughing with that same joy you always shared with her, but this time meant for him, made her chest feel hollow.
The thought kept spiraling, her mind betraying her with scenes she couldn't bear to picture.
You, with Brian, alone, closer than she'd ever be, maybe even leaning in for a kiss.
She imagined his hand brushing your cheek, the two of you getting so lost in each other that you forgot everyone else around you—including her.
The jealousy was sharp, hotter than anything she'd felt before.
She hated the way it took over, the way it made her feel small and powerless, like she was losing something that had never even been hers to begin with.
And then, a terrible, aching thought hit her: she might never get to be close to you in that way.
She might never get to be the person who held you, who kissed you, who made you laugh like that.
It wasn't just about watching you fall for someone else—it was the crushing realization that you might never look at her the way you looked at him.
Maybe it would be better if she came along?
The idea took a root in Tara's mind, an unexpected, half-formed plan that both excited and unsettled her.
If she went to the party with you and Brian, it might give her a chance to keep things from moving forward between you two.
She could play it off as tagging along to "keep an eye" on you, to make sure you had fun—and stay close enough to step in if Brian tried anything. It was risky, maybe even a little desperate, but what choice did she have?
At least if she was there, she'd know exactly what was happening. She wouldn't have to lie awake later, imagining him whispering things in your ear, pulling you close, stealing the attention she wanted only for herself.
She could keep you safe from all that, and maybe, if she was careful enough, find subtle ways to draw your attention back to her, where it belonged.
In her mind, it sounded almost justified. A "protective friend" sticking close to make sure you were all right. But the truth simmered beneath that excuse—she knew this was more than friendship, that she wanted to keep you to herself in ways you might never understand.
If Brian was going to try to win you over, he'd have to do it with her there, watching his every move, ready to swoop in the second things started looking too cozy.
And maybe, just maybe, she could find a way to make sure that night ended with you still hers—still looking at her with that easy, trusting smile that had always been her anchor.
Her chest tightened at the thought of it, the chance to stay close to you a little longer, to stave off the reality she dreaded.
If you didn't have the chance to fall for him—if she could prevent that—maybe she'd finally have the time and courage to make you see her the way she saw you.
You nudged her lightly, snapping Tara out of her thoughts, leaning in with that familiar, hopeful smile that always made it so hard to say no to you. "Come on, Tara. It'll be fun—just this once. Please?"
Tara's chest tightened at the way you looked at her, like her answer actually mattered to you. It made something inside her ache, the way your face lit up with excitement, completely oblivious to the storm brewing in her mind.
She should've said no. She wanted to say no.
But the thought of watching you leave without her—without knowing what might happen between you and Brian—made her stomach twist painfully.
And now, thanks to the idea she'd let herself entertain earlier, the thought of staying home didn't feel like an option anymore.
That plan, desperate and reckless as it was, had already taken root, and no matter how much a small part of her whispered it wasn't right, she couldn't let it go.
What if she stayed behind and missed her chance to stop something from blossoming between the two of you? What if she sat in her room, alone, while you fell for him right in front of everyone? The mere idea made her skin crawl.
But going wasn't any better. If she went, she'd have to watch you fawn over him, maybe even see you with him. And that thought was enough to make her want to bolt from the room. Yet here you were, looking at her like her presence actually mattered.
But why? Did you think she needed convincing, or was there some part of you that truly wanted her by your side? Her stomach churned at the thought.
She hesitated, her fingers brushing the hem of her shirt as she tried to keep her expression neutral. If she said no, you'd go without her, and that stung more than she wanted to admit. But if she said yes...
Her mind spun with the possibilities. She didn't even know what she'd do if she went—how far she was willing to take this twisted plan of hers. But what she did know, with a growing certainty, was that she couldn't stay behind. Not when the thought of Brian pulling you closer was enough to make her chest burn with jealousy.
Your face shifted slightly, your brows knitting together when she didn't answer right away.
"Tara," you pressed gently, your voice dipping into that teasing tone you always used when you were trying to coax her into something. "Come on," you pressed again, your grin widening when she hesitated. "You have to come. It won't be the same without you."
It won't be the same without you.
Those words sealed it, though not in the way you meant them to. Something twisted and desperate bloomed in her chest, making her pulse quicken.
You didn't even realize it, but you were giving her exactly what she wanted: a reason to stay close. A reason to be where she could see you—and control what happened between you and Brian.
"Fine," she said at last, forcing a smirk that didn't quite reach her eyes. "But don't complain when I tell you it sucks."
The way your entire face lit up at her answer sent an ache through her chest. Her stomach fluttered against her will, a mix of longing and guilt tangling together in a way that made it hard to breathe. She hated how much it affected her, how happy you seemed just because she'd agreed to go.
She looked away quickly, pretending to focus on something across the room, anything to avoid the way your joy sent another wave of guilt and longing through her.
She knew it wasn't right—none of this was. But she couldn't let it go. Not when her plan had already started to take shape. Not when the thought of Brian having you was enough to make her reckless.
Because no matter how hard she tried to tell herself this was just a party, just a stupid night out, deep down, she knew she wasn't going for the music or the fun.
She was going because if Brian thought he was going to win you over tonight, he was dead wrong.
___
"What about this one?"
Tara looked up from where she was sitting on the edge of your bed, her gaze drawn to the shimmering fabric you held up against yourself. It was a short, fitted dress, one you'd clearly been saving for a moment like this.
The way Tara sat there, watching you flit around the room, sifting through piles of clothes you'd pulled from your closet.
It reminded her of when you were younger, back when the two of you would raid your moms' closets, parading around in oversized heels and dresses that pooled around your feet. You'd giggle uncontrollably, striking exaggerated poses in front of the mirror.
But this wasn't dress-up anymore.
Now, the clothes were your own—real, grown-up outfits that fit you perfectly, accentuating curves and edges Tara wasn't sure she was supposed to notice. It wasn't just playtime; this was your life now. And tonight, you weren't dressing up for laughs or pretend tea parties.
You were dressing up for him.
Her eyes flickered briefly over the dress before settling on your face. You were beaming, the excitement practically radiating off you as you turned to the mirror, holding the dress against your body.
She should've said something. A simple "looks great" or even a teasing "a bit much, don't you think?" would've worked, but the words caught in her throat.
It wasn't the dress—it was the way your whole body hummed with energy, the way your smile was just a little too wide, your movements a little too quick. Tara saw it all, and it was like watching you wear your feelings on your sleeve.
The way you twirled the dress in front of the mirror, the way your hands moved restlessly as you smoothed down imaginary creases—it was all too familiar. She knew exactly what you were feeling, even if you didn't say it out loud.
Did Brian? She doubted it.
He didn't know the little things, like how your voice got higher when you were nervous or how you couldn't stand still when you were excited. He didn't know the way your lips pressed together when you were thinking too hard about something or the way your shoulders tensed when you wanted something to go perfectly.
He didn't know you, not like she did.
"What do you think?" you asked again, snapping her out of her thoughts. You turned, holding the dress out at arm's length, giving her a better look. "Too much? Not enough?"
Tara forced a smile, her heart twisting as she watched you. "I think it's... nice," she said carefully, her voice steady even as her stomach churned.
Nice. The word felt like a betrayal. It didn't come close to how she really felt—how beautiful you looked, how much she wished those bright eyes were sparkling for her instead of someone else.
"You think Brian'll like it?" you asked, your tone innocent, but the question struck Tara like a punch.
She swallowed hard, her fingers curling into the fabric of your comforter. She wanted to tell you Brian didn't deserve you, that he wouldn't know how to appreciate all the little things that made you you. But instead, she kept her tone casual, masking the storm inside her.
"I mean... yeah," she said after a pause. "It's hard not to like you in anything."
Your grin widened, lighting up the room in a way that made her stomach flutter. You didn't notice the tightness in her smile, the way her eyes lingered on you for just a second too long.
"You're the best." you said, turning back to the mirror.
Tara's chest tightened, a quiet ache settling beneath her ribs. She glanced away, forcing a small smile as she leaned back on her hands.
She let her fingers dug slightly into the comforter as she watched you move across the room again, this time heading toward your closet. You sifted through the hangers with an almost frantic energy, pulling out one piece of clothing after another until something caught your eye.
"This," you announced, holding up a sleek black skirt and a tiny top with delicate lace accents.
Tara blinked, her focus shifting from the faint hum of her own thoughts to the outfit in your hands. The skirt was just short enough to grab attention, and the top would clung to the curves in all the right places—your curves, she couldn't help but think.
Her stomach twisted again, but not with the same bitterness from earlier. No, this was something else entirely. She couldn't stop herself from picturing you in it, couldn't stop the way her mind immediately conjured the image of you standing there, all done up, looking effortlessly hot and completely out of her reach.
She swallowed hard, tearing her gaze away. "You're not wearing the dress?" she asked, her voice steadier than she felt.
"Oh, I am," you replied with a grin, holding the outfit closer to her. "This is for you!"
Tara froze. For a moment, she forgot how to breathe, her chest tightening as your words sank in.
She had been so caught up in watching you, so wrapped up in her own spiral of emotions, that she had momentarily forgotten she was actually going to this party.
"Me?" she echoed, her brows furrowing slightly as she tried to act like the idea of dressing up didn't make her stomach drop.
You laughed softly, stepping closer to hold the outfit up against her frame. "Yeah, you! Come on, Tara, you can't just wear that." You half-pointed to her attire.
Tara's eyes darted to the mirror, catching a glimpse of herself in her usual hoodie and jeans.
She had planned on blending into the background tonight, just another shadow in the corner, but now you were holding out a version of herself she wasn't sure she wanted to confront.
"It's... a little much, don't you think?" she murmured, her fingers brushing over the fabric.
"Not at all," you said, undeterred. "Trust me, you'll look amazing.
The way you looked at her, so excited, so hopeful, made it impossible for her to argue. The truth was, she didn't want to blend into the background—not really. Not if it meant letting Brian win.
"Alright," she said finally, forcing a small smirk as she reached for the outfit.
You grinned, clearly thrilled, and the sight sent her heart fluttering all over again.
As she stood up to take the clothes in you, the weight of the night ahead settled on her shoulders again. She knew this wasn't about the clothes or the party. It was about you—about keeping you close, about holding onto the part of you that still felt like hers, even if it wasn't.
And as much as she hated to admit it, she was willing to do whatever it took to keep it that way.
Tara pulled the clothes from your hands, her fingers brushing yours for just a second longer than necessary before she turned away.
She hesitated only briefly, her eyes darting to the bathroom door, but then she decided against it. It wasn't like this was anything new. You'd seen her change plenty of times before.
Slipping off her hoodie, she pulled the top over her head, the soft lace brushing against her skin in a way that felt oddly delicate, almost foreign.
The skirt followed, the fabric snug around her waist and flaring slightly at her hips. When she finally turned back toward you, she caught sight of herself in the mirror.
It was strange. She didn't recognize the girl staring back at her right away—not entirely. The clothes fit her so well, so effortlessly, that she felt a flicker of something unexpected: pride.
She looked... pretty. Not in the same way you did, with your radiant energy that drew everyone in, but still. Pretty enough.
Her heart jumped a little at the thought of you seeing her like this, of you noticing her in the way she always noticed you. She didn't know why she wanted that so badly, but the hope curled tightly in her chest, warm and persistent.
You looked up from where you'd been smoothing out your own dress, and your reaction was immediate. Your eyes widened slightly, and then your face lit up in that effortless way that always made her stomach flutter.
"Tara, oh my god, you look so good," you said, your voice soft but genuine, carrying none of the over-the-top excitement you sometimes used when joking around. This was real.
Tara felt her cheeks warm under your gaze, her fingers automatically reaching to adjust the hem of the skirt, as if she could somehow shield herself from the weight of your words. She tried to play it off, shrugging casually. "It's just a skirt," she mumbled, but her voice lacked its usual bite.
"It's not just a skirt," you countered, stepping closer. "You look amazing. Seriously, this is perfect for you."
Your words were kind, almost too kind, and Tara wasn't sure how to process them. There was no teasing, no playful edge, just an earnestness that made her chest feel tight and achy.
She glanced away, pretending to focus on her reflection again, but the warmth of your approval lingered, sinking into her skin like the lace of the top.
She wanted to feel good about it, to let herself bask in the way you saw her, but the nagging thought that this wasn't for her—that it was all part of your excitement for Brian—kept her grounded.
Still, the way you smiled at her, so unreserved and so entirely you, made her feel something she hadn't in a long time: seen. She wished, just for a second, that you were saying all of this for the same reason she wished you would.
You spun on your heel, nearly tripping over the pile of discarded clothes strewn across the floor in your excitement. Tara's breath caught for a second, her hand twitching instinctively like she was about to reach for you, but you caught yourself, laughing it off as if nothing had happened.
"You need to clean your room before someone gets hurt," Tara muttered, though her tone held more amusement than annoyance.
You ignored her, too caught up in the moment as you reached your makeup table, rifling through your collection with a kind of chaotic precision.
Pulling out a palette, you held it up, the colors catching the light as you grinned at her. "What do you think? Want me to do your makeup?"
Your voice was so full of unfiltered excitement, your smile so wide it made her stomach flip. Tara hesitated, her fingers brushing the hem of her skirt as she glanced at the palette in your hands. She wasn't really the makeup type—not like you were—but the way you looked at her, like you were just waiting to make her feel special, made it impossible to say no.
"You don't have to," Tara said finally, though her voice lacked conviction.
"I want to!" you insisted, stepping closer, the palette still in hand. "Please, Tara? I promise I'll keep it simple. Just a little something to go with the outfit."
She sighed, feigning reluctance as she sat back down on the edge of the bed. "Fine."
You grabbed a chair and pulled it in front of her, gesturing for her to sit. "Alright, let's make you even more stunning."
Tara rolled her eyes, though the faintest smile tugged at the corners of her lips as she leaned forward.
___
The buzz of the party hit you as soon as you stepped through the door.
Music pulsed through the house, the bass vibrating in your chest as voices overlapped in a cacophony of laughter and shouted greetings.
People crowded the space—groups gathered near the kitchen, couples pressed close against walls, and a few brave souls danced in the living room, already letting loose despite how early it was in the night.
You glanced over at Tara, catching the way her shoulders stiffened slightly as the noise and energy enveloped her. She'd been quiet on the drive over, her fingers drumming against her thigh in a way that let you know her nerves were kicking in. But she'd never admit that, not to you.
"See?" you said brightly, bumping her shoulder with yours as you stepped further into the house. "I told you this would be fun."
Tara gave you a look, one that was half-skepticism and half-amusement, as she tugged at the hem of her skirt. "Yeah, we'll see about that."
Your laugh was warm and easy, a sound that somehow made the chaos of the party seem less overwhelming. You reached back to grab her hand, pulling her through the crowd as you made your way toward the kitchen. The feel of your fingers around hers made something in Tara's chest twist uncomfortably, though she forced herself to ignore it.
The kitchen was just as packed as the rest of the house, but you managed to snag two drinks from the counter, handing one to her with a grin. "Alright, party rule number one: stay hydrated."
Tara raised an eyebrow, glancing at the cup in her hand. "This is definitely not water."
"Details." You waved her off, your playful smirk making her stomach flutter in that maddeningly familiar way.
Before she could respond, a voice called out from across the room. "Y/N! There you are!"
Tara's grip on her cup tightened as she followed your gaze, her stomach sinking when she saw him—Brian—making his way toward you. His smile was wide and easy, the kind of grin that would make anyone else swoon.
But Tara wasn't anyone else.
"Brian!" you said, your face lighting up in a way that made Tara's chest ache. She stepped back slightly, letting go of your hand as he drew closer, though her eyes never left you.
He didn't deserve that smile.
Brian's gaze flickered to her briefly, his smile faltering just a bit. "Tara, right?"
She nodded, her expression neutral as she took a sip of her drink. "That's me."
If he noticed the edge in her tone, he didn't comment on it, turning his attention back to you instead. "You look amazing," he said, his eyes raking over your dress in a way that made Tara's jaw tighten.
You beamed at him, clearly pleased by the compliment, and Tara had to look away, her hand gripping her cup so tightly she was surprised it didn't crack.
This was going to be a long night.
And it most definitely was.
As the night went on, the party only grew louder and more chaotic. People drifted in and out of the circle you, Tara, and Brian had settled into, friends of his joining the conversation with easy smiles and casual jokes.
You made a genuine effort to include Tara, always pulling her back in when she started to fade into the background, but it was clear who held your focus.
Brian.
He stood close to you, his arm brushing yours as he leaned in to talk over the music.
You didn't seem to notice—or maybe you did, and you didn't mind. Either way, the proximity between you two only seemed to grow as the minutes ticked by, and Tara couldn't stop watching.
Every time you laughed at something he said, her chest tightened just a little more.
You weren't doing it on purpose. Tara knew that. She knew you didn't notice the way her jaw clenched or how her fingers drummed against her cup.
You were just being you—kind, bubbly, and effortlessly charming. But watching you with Brian, seeing how much of your attention he was soaking up, felt like a slow, relentless sting.
She hadn't expected it to bother her this much.
At first, Tara tried to play along, chiming in when she could and taking small sips of her drink to distract herself.
But then Brian's friends started joining the conversation, their loud energy making it harder for her to keep up. You were still trying to include her, turning to her every so often to ask her opinion or flash her one of your brilliant smiles, but it wasn't enough.
Not when you lit up like a damn firework every time Brian said something that made you laugh.
Tara tipped back her cup, finishing it quicker than she probably should have. She wasn't much of a drinker to begin with—she never really liked how it made her feel—but tonight was different. Tonight, she needed the edge taken off.
"Want another?" you asked, noticing her empty cup.
She hesitated, but before she could respond, Brian offered. "I'll grab her one. Be right back."
She opened her mouth to say she didn't need another, but he was already walking away.
You smiled after him before turning back to Tara, your expression so full of effortless warmth it made her stomach churn. "You having fun?"
She forced a small nod, her grip tightening on the plastic cup. "Yeah. It's... fine."
You didn't notice the strain in her voice, too caught up in the energy of the party to catch on.
By the time Brian returned with her drink, she'd already decided she wasn't going to overthink it. She took it with a quiet "thanks" and drank just enough to feel the buzz set in. It wasn't much—maybe two drinks total—but Tara was short, and she always felt the effects quicker than most.
The alcohol didn't drown out her frustration, though.
Every laugh you gave Brian, every time you leaned in to whisper something to him, only seemed to magnify it.
And you? You were oblivious. Still trying to keep her in the conversation, pulling her in with the same ease you always had. But she could feel the gap widening.
Tara's foot tapped against the floor as she shifted her weight, her eyes flickering between you and Brian. She should've left, should've wandered off to another part of the house to escape this torturous little triangle, but she stayed.
Because if she left, she'd have to admit to herself why she couldn't handle this.
So instead, she took another sip of her drink and plastered on a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes.
"You okay?" you asked, your voice cutting through her thoughts.
"Yeah," she said quickly, her words sharper than she intended. "I'm fine."
But she wasn't. And as the night wore on, that became harder and harder to hide.
And after an hour, or maybe even more.
The alcohol was definitely working its way through Tara's veins. She could feel it, the familiar warmth spreading through her chest, making her limbs feel looser but her thoughts louder.
The edges of the room blurred ever so slightly, but her focus on you was sharp as ever, almost painfully so.
You were giggling at something Brian said again, your hand brushing his arm like it was the most natural thing in the world.
Tara had been watching you both like a hawk all night, trying to play it cool, but the subtle touches, the shared smiles, the way your eyes sparkled when you looked at him—it was getting under her skin.
She clenched her jaw, tipping back the rest of her drink as if it might drown out the frustration bubbling inside her. But it didn't.
It wasn't just the alcohol making her feel reckless, though it didn't help. Tara was desperate.
Desperate to do something—anything—that might shift the balance back in her favor. But how? She wasn't like Brian. She didn't have easy jokes or effortless charm. And she wasn't like you, all soft laughter and open smiles.
So she sat there, stewing in her own silence, searching for an opening she couldn't find.
Then she turned her head for just a moment.
A distraction—a loud burst of laughter from somewhere across the room. She glanced over, barely processing the source, and when she looked back...
Her heart stopped.
You and Brian were kissing.
It wasn't shy or hesitant. It was full and unguarded, like something out of the movies. His hands rested lightly on your waist, your fingers clutching the front of his shirt as though you were afraid to let go.
Tara's first thought wasn't sadness. It wasn't heartbreak or even surprise.
It was rage.
Her body went rigid, the plastic cup in her hand creaking under the force of her grip.
Because of course this wasn't a problem.
Why would it be?
You weren't hers. You'd never been hers. You were allowed to kiss boys, especially the boy you'd been crushing on for as long as she could remember. It wasn't like you were breaking some unspoken rule. She had no claim to you, no right to feel betrayed or blindsided.
But God, it felt like a betrayal.
Her rational mind tried to reason with her, repeating the same useless mantra: This isn't a problem. This isn't a problem. This isn't a problem.
But the other side of her mind—the side that had been clawing its way to the surface all night—was screaming the opposite.
It was a problem. A huge one.
The anger burned through her like a wildfire, consuming every rational thought as it spread. It started in her chest, hot and heavy, before curling into her throat and setting her teeth on edge. Her nails dug into the soft plastic of her cup until it crumpled under her grip, a sharp crack breaking through the buzz of the party.
And still, she couldn't look away.
She hated it. Hated the way his hands touched you so easily, like he'd earned that right. Hated the way you kissed him back like you'd been waiting for this your whole life. Hated how he got to have what she wanted so desperately without even knowing how much it mattered.
Her breaths came quicker, each one catching in her chest as if she couldn't quite fill her lungs. The alcohol amplified everything, stripping her bare of the filters she usually relied on. Every raw, unspoken feeling she'd buried for years was rising to the surface now, and there was no stopping it.
She wanted to scream.
To grab you and pull you away, to tell Brian to get his hands off you, to do something.
But she didn't.
Because no matter how angry she was, no matter how much she hated what she was seeing, there was a part of her—a small, quiet, agonizing part—that whispered:
You're not supposed to feel like this.
So instead, Tara sat there, her body tense and trembling, her nails biting into the palms of her hands. She didn't even realize she'd crumpled her cup until the sticky remnants of her drink dripped onto her lap.
And still, she couldn't look away.
Eventually you pulled back from Brian, cheeks flushed and eyes slightly glassy from the alcohol coursing through your system.
A small, almost dazed laugh escaped your lips as you glanced at him, then turned to find Tara in the crowd. She hadn't moved from where she'd been watching, her posture stiff and her eyes fixed on some indistinct point on the wall—anywhere but you.
When your gaze landed on her, your smile widened, bright and unrestrained, like you hadn't just set her entire world on fire.
Tara's chest tightened, the molten frustration inside her bubbling hotter with every passing second. She couldn't stop her thoughts, couldn't silence the storm brewing in her mind.
You stumbled a little as you reached her, still grinning like a fool, your energy infectious to everyone but Tara. You leaned close, tipping forward on your toes, your voice loud but slurred enough to betray your tipsy state.
"I think he kissed me," you said, as if it hadn't been entirely mutual.
Tara felt something snap.
Her fingers curled into fists at her sides, her nails digging into her palms so hard she half-expected to draw blood.
She couldn't speak, couldn't trust herself to even try. If she opened her mouth, she was sure she'd yell or say something she couldn't take back. Worse, she might cry—and that wasn't an option.
Her silence stretched on, but you didn't seem to notice. You were too lost in your own world, your thoughts spinning with the buzz of the alcohol and the remnants of Brian's touch. Tara's silence didn't matter, because you filled the space with another easy laugh, leaning closer so she could hear you over the pounding music.
"I need to use the bathroom," you said, your lips brushing near her ear. The warmth of your breath made her stomach twist. "Wanna come?"
Tara's mind scrambled for an excuse, her mouth dry as she fought the urge to say something reckless.
"No," she said finally, forcing her voice to sound casual, detached. "I think I'm good down here."
It wasn't true. She wasn't good down here, or anywhere else in the universe at that moment.
You gave her a light shrug, your expression still full of that easy joy that made her want to scream. "Okay! Be right back!"
You disappeared into the crowd, weaving your way toward the bathroom, leaving Tara standing there alone.
The second you were out of sight, she exhaled sharply, her hands shaking as she reached for another drink she didn't need.
She wasn't sure if it was the alcohol, the anger, or the ache of jealousy threatening to overwhelm her. Maybe it was all three, swirling into something she couldn't control.
But one thing was clear—she couldn't keep this up. Not tonight. Not with you and Brian. Not with her chest full of feelings she couldn't name and didn't want to face.
Tara's eyes burned as they landed on Brian, standing not far from where you'd left him. His posture was easy, relaxed—too relaxed.
He stood there like nothing had happened, chatting casually with a couple of his friends, his hand lifting a red cup to his lips like this was just another night. Like he hadn't just kissed you.
The most beautiful girl on the planet.
Tara felt her stomach twist painfully, her grip tightening around the drink in her hand. How could he be so unbothered? So unaffected? He wasn't grinning ear to ear, wasn't puffing out his chest or gushing about how lucky he was.
He wasn't laughing with joy or smirking proudly like any sane person would if they'd just kissed you.
How was he not telling everyone in earshot about what had happened? How was he not reeling from the fact that you—you, with your blinding smile and endless energy—had given him even a second of your time, let alone your lips?
Her jaw clenched, teeth grinding together as she stared at him, her anger bubbling hotter with every second he stayed calm. Her hands itched to grab him by the collar, to shake him and demand he act like he understood the weight of what had just happened.
Did he even realize how lucky he was?
Did he know how many people in that room—how many people in general—would kill to be in his place? To have even the tiniest fraction of your attention, let alone that?
Her vision blurred, and it wasn't from the alcohol. Her chest felt like it was about to implode, like something inside her was trying desperately to escape, and she didn't know how much longer she could keep it together.
Brian's laughter snapped her out of her spiraling thoughts. He was laughing at something one of his friends said, his expression light, carefree—unbothered.
Tara nearly saw red.
She downed the rest of her drink in one go, the sharp burn doing nothing to dull the fury roaring in her chest. How could he be like this? How could he act so normal, so indifferent, after kissing you?
How could he not be overwhelmed by the fact that you'd chosen him, even for a fleeting moment?
It was insulting. Infuriating.
She wanted to march over there, to grab him and make him feel the way she was feeling. She wanted him to hurt, to ache, to boil with jealousy the way she was.
But she couldn't.
Because none of this was his fault.
The real issue—the one she didn't want to admit—wasn't Brian. It was the simple, heartbreaking truth that he could kiss you without consequence.
He could have you.
Tara wasn't sure what happened next.
What she was thinking when it happened, or if she was even thinking at all. Maybe it was the anger—burning hot and uncontrollable—making her body move before her brain could catch up. Or maybe it was the alcohol, buzzing in her veins and drowning out every voice in her head that might've told her to stop.
All she knew was that one second she was standing there, glaring at Brian like he'd committed some unforgivable sin, and the next, she was storming toward him.
His friends noticed her first, their chatter faltering as they shifted awkwardly under her sharp glare. But Brian, oblivious as ever, didn't see her coming. He was mid-sentence, that stupidly calm look still plastered on his face, when Tara grabbed the front of his shirt and yanked him down to her level.
The movement was forceful enough to knock the air out of both of them, and before he could even process what was happening—before she could process what was happening—she pressed her lips against his.
It wasn't soft.
It wasn't sweet.
It was messy, rough, and fueled by a cocktail of rage and desperation. Her hands fisted his shirt tightly, holding him in place, her nails biting into the fabric. Brian stiffened for a second, shocked, but then his hands hovered awkwardly near her waist, unsure of what to do.
Tara didn't care. She didn't care about his reaction, about his hesitation.
Because this wasn't about him.
It wasn't about his stupid, clueless face or the fact that he'd kissed you without giving it a second thought. It wasn't about him being unbothered or unaffected.
This was about her.
Her anger, her frustration, her absolute inability to sit there for another second and watch him act like kissing you was nothing.
The kiss deepened as her grip on his shirt tightened, pulling him even closer. She wanted to erase the memory of you from his lips, to replace it with her own. To make him feel something, anything, the way she was feeling.
But it wasn't working.
If anything, the kiss only made it worse.
Because no matter how hard she pressed, no matter how desperate her movements were, it didn't feel right.
It didn't feel like you.
And that thought was like a punch to the gut.
Brian made a soft, surprised noise against her lips, his hands finally settling on her hips, but it only made her angrier. How dare he hesitate now? How dare he act so unsure, like he didn't know exactly what he wanted when he'd so easily taken you from her just minutes ago?
Her chest heaved as she pulled back slightly, her lips still brushing against his, her heart pounding in her ears.
His wide eyes stared at her, confused and more than a little alarmed. "Tara—" his voice laced with bewilderment, but she silenced him with another kiss, pressing harder, needing to cut him off.
She didn't want to hear his voice. She didn't want to hear him try to make sense of this, because she didn't have an explanation. This wasn't about him.
It wasn't about you either—not entirely, at least.
It was about her. About the way she felt like she was unraveling, about how every smile you gave Brian felt like another thread being yanked loose, every laugh you shared with him felt like a blow to the chest.
She didn't know how to make it stop, and the only thing her mind could come up with was this. She didn't have to think when she was kissing Brian. Didn't have to feel the jagged ache of watching you be so happy with someone else.
This wasn't about him.
But it was all she could do to stop herself from falling apart completely.
And Tara wasn't sure what was happening anymore.
Brian hadn't pushed her away. He hadn't stopped her, hadn't hesitated for even a moment after that first surprised noise.
No, he'd leaned into it. He'd kissed her back with the kind of intent that only made her angrier, made the fire in her chest blaze so hot she thought she might combust right there.
Because it wasn't supposed to go like this.
His hands slid from her hips, pulling her closer, pressing her tighter against him, and she hated it. Hated the way he responded like this was exactly what he wanted, hated the way he kissed her back like she wasn't just a replacement for you.
And worse than anything, she hated herself for not stopping it.
His hands moved lower, gripping her ass, pulling her even closer, and she felt herself clench her fists tighter into the fabric of his shirt.
She didn't know if it was the alcohol buzzing in her veins, numbing her better judgment, or if it was the anger still consuming her every thought, but she didn't do anything to stop him.
She should've.
But she didn't.
Because in this moment, it wasn't about him. It wasn't even about you. It was about the chaos she felt boiling in her chest, about the way she felt like she was spiraling further and further out of control.
Brian murmured something against her lips—she didn't catch it, didn't even try to—but his hands stayed firm on her, guiding her, pulling her toward the stairs.
And she let him.
Every step felt like she was wading through quicksand, her mind shouting at her to stop, to push him away, to pull herself together. But her body wasn't listening. She didn't know if it was the heat of his hands on her or the fog of alcohol clouding her better judgment, but she let him lead her.
Because stopping meant facing the truth. And Tara wasn't ready to do that.
Not yet.
She'd barely registered how they ended up in the room. One second, she was being pulled up the stairs, Brian's hand gripping hers tightly, and the next, they were in a dimly lit bedroom, the door clicking shut behind them.
Her heart was racing, but not from excitement. There was no thrill, no anticipation, just a gnawing sense of wrongness she couldn't shake. Yet she didn't stop it. She didn't stop him as his hands found her waist, as his lips trailed down her neck. She didn't stop herself from responding, from letting this spiral further than it ever should have.
It was mechanical, empty, and every moment felt like it was happening to someone else. Brian's touch wasn't unpleasant, but it wasn't what she wanted. His lips weren't the ones she craved, his hands didn't spark anything but an aching hollowness inside her.
And yet, she let it happen.
Because, for a fleeting second, it felt like power. Like control. Like maybe, just maybe, if she could take this from him—take you from him in some twisted, nonsensical way—it would hurt less.
But it didn't.
Every touch, every kiss, every whispered word she barely heard, only drove the knife deeper into her chest.
When it was over, the silence was deafening. Tara lay there, staring at the ceiling, her body still and her mind racing. Brian shifted beside her, saying something she didn't hear, and the sound of his voice made her stomach twist. She felt nauseous, disgusted—not with him, but with herself.
What had she done?
Her chest tightened as she fought to keep her breathing steady, refusing to let him see the tears threatening to spill over. It hadn't helped. It hadn't made anything better. If anything, it had only made everything worse.
Because no matter what she did, no matter how far she went, it would never be enough to make her stop wanting you.
Afterwards Tara laid still, the dim light of the room casting shadows that felt too heavy, too oppressive.
Brian was beside her, breathing evening out as if nothing monumental had just happened. As if this was just another casual moment in his life.
Her mind, however, wouldn't stop.
It wasn't Brian she was thinking about—not the way he'd touched her, not the way he'd looked at her. No, every thought clawed its way back to you.
She pictured you in the bathroom, probably still staring at yourself in the mirror, giddy and flushed. She could almost see your smile, so wide it was infectious, and the way you'd probably tilt your head, trying to relive every second of that kiss.
You'd been dreaming of that moment since second grade, scribbling his name in the margins of your notebooks and lighting up every time he was near. Tara could already imagine how you'd be practically glowing, heart racing with excitement as you ran your fingers over your lips, trying to make the feeling last.
She wanted to hate you for it. But she couldn't. She never could.
You'd come out of that bathroom with a smile so bright it could light up the whole house, your hopeful eyes scanning the crowd as you made your way back to the spot you'd all been standing. And what would you find?
Nothing.
Tara wasn't there. Brian wasn't there.
She could imagine how your smile would falter, confusion settling in as you looked around, searching for the two people who were supposed to be waiting for you. How long would it take for the excitement to drain from your face? How quickly would hope turn to disappointment?
The thought was like a knife twisting in her gut.
And yet, she still couldn't make sense of why she'd done this. Why she'd let it happen. Because it didn't feel like she'd won anything. She hadn't taken Brian away from you. If anything, she'd stolen something from herself—something she could never get back.
Her chest tightened as the realization hit her like a freight train. She hadn't wanted him. She hadn't wanted this.
She'd wanted you.
And now she'd ruined everything.
445 notes · View notes
sageworld · 2 months ago
Text
NSFW alphabet • Paige Bueckers
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A • Aftercare
paige is usually pretty sleepy after, considering her busy schedule sex is almost always late at night, if she has nothing to do the next morning she’ll either stay up and cuddle you or you guys will split screen some fortnite.
B • Body part
paige loves your body but your ass holds her heart, she loves the way it jiggles when she smacks it, the way you look while she’s giving you back shots with her strap, she’s obsessed.
C • Cum
she does not care how long it takes, you’re cumming😭. her favorite is when you cum while you ride her face, juices going all over her.
D • Dirty secret
she wants a threesome with another fem so bad but would never ask!!! if you brought it up though she would be 100% down
E • Experience
by the time you met paige she had already slept with what feels like a percentage of the girls at uconn but she puts it to good use.
F • Favorite position
paige could never decide what was her favorite, she always said you have a face built for missionary and a ass built for back shots, but she does love when you can both get off with 69 at the same time.
G • Goofy
this girl teases you so bad during sex, mocking your moans, slapping ur clit with the strap until you’re screaming while laughing her ass off.
“what’s wrong sweet girl? too much?” paige laughs, slapping your clit like a mad man with the strap. “mm stop.” you cry, tears pouring down your face clearly overstimulated. you try and sit up but she just shoves you back down “mm stoppp” she mocks you. “yeah yeah baby, shut up and take it.” she grunts before plunging into you
H • Hair
bsffr this girl does not care and 99% of other lesbians don’t either, you both do as you please.
I • Intimacy
while she can have her goofy moments, there’s other times where she locks in. you riding her thigh and her infamous stare glazing you. one hand in your hair and the other on your ass helping your motion, her back pressed against the head board & while you’re naked as the day you were born she’s clothed in her sports bra and shorts. “just like that pretty girl, ride mommy’s leg.”
J • Jack off
she has to be away from you for at least a week before she cracks, & when she does she facetimes you to help. she loves watching you play with yourself over the screen.
K • Kink
SIZE KINK, she loves making you feel smaller than you really are, you’re smaller than her 6’0 muscular frame and she can’t get enough. it doesn’t matter if you’re 5’0 or 5’9 she loves treating you like her little baby.
L • Location
the riskiest you’ve done it was on a hotel balcony, she had you bent over the railing, knuckles deep inside you. besides that and the normal thrill of her team mates constantly being around you guys keep it in the bedroom, yours guys’ or the hotels.
M • Motivation
it doesn’t take much to get her going it could be the simplest thing like you tying your hair back and she’s all over you. when she’s drunk she’s a hornball, pulling you out of the party to go home and strap you up.
N • NO
paige will not let you strap her up, as many times as you’ve asked she simply will not. she says it’s your job to take strap not hers. she does love your tongue and fingers though.
O • Oral
she loves giving and receiving, she can’t choose which is why most nights end up in a 69, you licking her hot pussy while yours is shoved in her face, sucking all on your clit, massaging your ass.
P • (pesbian jk lol) Pace
depends on what she’s doing. if she’s eating you out it’s slow and sensual, spitting in your hole and licking it up, tongue running laps on your pussy. best believe she’s a head shaker. if she’s strapping you she’s fucking the life out of you, backshots sounding like gunshots just egging her on more.
Q • Quickie
while she prefers taking her time she’s had moments of weakness where she just needs your pussy shoved in her face of hers shoved in yours. once when she was leaving for a game she just needed one out so, she pulled down her pants in your living room, put her back against your wall, shoved you on your knees and put your face in her pussy.
“fuck just like that mama.” she moaned, shorts at her ankles, shoes on. she didn’t have much time but she needed this. her hands wrapping your hair into a ponytail, nodding your head as she thrusts into your tongue. “shiiiiit.” she throws her head back, humping your face as you admire her beauty from below.
R • Risks
like i said, you guys keep it private, not really daring to go outside of your shared space. she’s the most talked about name in women’s basketball right now and isn’t trying to have that ruined by some sex scandal.
S • Stamina
you guys will go for hours. i’m talking red swollen clits, irritated nipples, sore tongues and swollen jaws. there’s been times when paige strapped you for so long you cursed her and her cardio.
T • Toys
you guys have a drawer filled. dildos, straps, vibrations, hand cuffs, maybe a butt plug. she loves using them on you.
U • Unfair
while she loves being a bully, she’s not gonna deny you an orgasm if she feels like being mean or like you need to be punished she’s overstimulating you until you’re crying. swollen, pussy, irritated nipples and she’s still fingering you and biting your nipples and all you can do is cry.
V • Volume
she’s so vocal. the first time you rode her strap she moaned so loud you would’ve thought it was actually apart of her. the phantom dick is bad in this one i fear.
“you feel so good on my cock baby, come on. don’t stop…fuck.” she cries out, leaning up to suck on your nipple, both hands on your ass as you ride her like no tomorrow.
W • Wild card
she’s a spitter, you’re mouth, pussy, nipples, asshole, she’s spitting in it. she also loves making out, tongues swirling, saliva all over eachothers mouths.
X • X-Ray
coochie meow meow 😸
Y • Yearning
she’s horny 100% of the time you’re around. she’s constantly feeling you up, if you’re in public she tries to be slick with it.
Z • zzz (sleepy)
like i said in the start, she’s usually pretty sleepy after sex but sometimes she’ll stay up. depends on what’s going on but for the most part she’s knocking out.
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arieslost · 7 months ago
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lando looking after his gf when shes coming down with a fever. she’s all dizzy and nauseous but he’s by her side, holding her up with his hand on her waist to guide her around the house so that her dizziness doesn’t take over and she flops onto the floor. i just think he would be such a sweetheart when his girl is ill
the way this was exactly how i felt on my birthday a couple weeks ago bc i had covid…
TW illness/dizziness!!!
he seems like the type of guy to be very attentive to his girl no matter what, but especially when she isn’t feeling well. he might panic internally, because he can’t immediately come up with a solution that will make her feel better, but he won’t let her see it.
he’ll be sitting with her on the couch, her legs resting over his lap, gently combing his fingers through her hair because she’d mumbled, “feels nice,” the words barely discernible as they passed through her pale lips. and he wants to do everything in his power to make her feel better.
“d’you want to go back to bed?” he’ll ask eventually, after watching her adjust her position on the couch a few times.
“i’m so dizzy,” she whispers, a hand coming up to press at her eyes, her forehead. “even just laying here, i’m so dizzy.”
“let me help you back to bed,” he suggests, slowly sitting up as to not jostle her too much. “i’m gonna put your legs down, okay? i’ll help you sit up and we’ll go from there.”
she lets him guide her with utmost trust, and he’ll bring up how special and loved that makes him feel another time when she’s feeling better. eventually he gets her on her feet, holding her still for a moment so she can get her bearings.
“don’t let go,” she says, voice monotone.
“never,” he promises, one hand firm on her hip and the other tightly grasped in her own. “i’ve got you.”
she doesn’t express her thanks until he has her gently laid in bed, a cool cloth resting on her forehead. he straightens up for a moment in order to figure out how to best join her without disturbing her newfound peace, and she reaches for his hand again.
“lan?”
“yeah?”
“thank you for taking care of me,” she says quietly.
his heart melts at the sight of her, some color returning to her face as she holds onto him.
“always, baby.” he replies, kissing the top of her head.
and she knows that, when he inevitably ends up in her position a few days later, she’ll say the same exact thing to him.
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sugrhigh · 8 months ago
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THE BOY IS MINE - ( m.s )
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REQUESTED**
summary- after years of friendship, you’ve seen matt date people before, but none of them have been as bad as this new one. you’ve never interfered with any of the girls in the past, but one night she takes it too far and your true feelings come out.
warnings- cursing, unprotected sex (pretend ur on birth control but also wrap it before you tap it), choking, cheating, dom!matt, it’s smut with a plot guys are we surprised (read at ur own fucking discretion PLEASE!)
a/n: thank you @stonermattsgf for the request!! i fucking loved this concept and the song eats down i hope i did u some justice <3 the touch it chris fic will be coming too cuz im fuckin with that song as well (if you weren’t tagged it wouldn’t let me tag you, i’m sorry!!)
@fawnchives @teapartyprincess4two @sturnioloco @mattinside @l9vesick @sturnsblunt @ev3rgreenxtrees @wh0resstuff @matthewsmocktails @cherrypostsposts @bxbynyah7 @seababehh @sturnsfav @mattsluv @sturniolossss @melanch0lybby @sturniolos-blog @lustfulslxt @sturnioloobssesd @ginswife @amypull @vivianalovesmatt @st4niolos @sturnioloobessed @sturnlova @bigbeefybitch @minhyucks @iheart-zegras @vicsguitarr @melonjollyranche @hearts4matty @vickyzloserz @user8000000 @xoxo4chrisss @unfilteredassmf @mattsbiggesthoe @chrisstopherfilmed @st3rniolo @goldengrapejuice @luv2matt @vsangel-starbies @mikaelabutterfield @mattnchrisworld @bluesturniolo333 @wurlibydominicfike @kp07on @hayleyreadsblog
in no universe did you expect to be pining after one of your best friends.
it had always been strictly platonic between you and matt, aside from a little harmless flirting over the years. you loved him and his brothers so much that you never wanted to mess anything up, or complicate things when the dynamic was already perfect.
but as much as you’re close with each of them, you know you’ve always understood matt on a deeper level. you share the same goals, the same fears, even the same taste in music and movies.
he’s always been the first person to check in, the only one who can read your mood like the back of his hand, the guy who cheers you up and lets you cry on his shoulder when things are shitty.
despite these sweet gestures, you’ve both had your fair share of relationships and flings while being best friends. none of them have ever bothered you before, and you’ve always tried to be respectful and kind to whichever girl he picks.
that is, until now.
matt is sitting across from you on the couch in their living room, slight frown etched on his face. his girlfriend, maya, has her legs sprawled across his lap comfortably, arms linked like she’s claiming him.
her eyes are practically locked on you. you don’t blame her; she’s well aware that you’re not her biggest fan.
all she does is complain about all of the things she doesn’t like about matt. last time she hung out with you guys, she was bitching about the fact that he kissed her in public at a party, as if she was worried he was scaring off other guys.
when he buys her flowers, they’re the wrong ones. if he takes her to dinner, she whines about the food. she’ll even criticize his clothes, demanding that they match and he hides the tattoos. to her, he can’t do anything right, even though he’s incredible just the way he is.
so it drives you absolutely insane watching the way she walks all over matt, all over his brothers, even you. it’s been two months of this agony, and you can’t believe it’s even lasted this long.
you spend nearly every day thinking about how much better you could treat him. every time he touches you, no matter how briefly, your skin burns in desire. it’s selfish to want someone who’s taken, and you’re well aware of that.
but you just love matt, you know him. and he deserves better. maybe it’s you, maybe it’s not. but it’s certainly not maya.
“give it to me, fuckhead.” chris’s voice rips you out of your trance, and you snap your head toward the middle of the U-shaped sofa.
he’s currently fighting nick for the remote, who slaps the side of his arm rather hard. chris lets go, only to pull his brother into a headlock seconds later. nick lets out a yelp of surprise, jamming an elbow into his side to get him to stop.
in all the commotion, you decide to grab the remote for yourself, a wide smile settling across your features as you take it into your palm.
they both notice quickly, groaning in protest as you wave it at them tauntingly.
“too slow! now i get to pick, idiots.” you tease.
“c’mon, i just went to war for that thing.” nick complains, kicking your leg half-heartedly, but you just shake your head.
“snooze you lose.”
you scroll through your options, trying to pay no mind to the way maya is whispering to matt for so long she could be reciting the bible. then your eyes land on a title that makes you pause, chuckling a little to yourself.
“oh no way, they have fucking cocaine bear on here?” chris cackles.
nick looks rather amused himself, raising his eyebrows like he’s intrigued. “i mean, i’m game.”
you glance over at matt, who’s already looking at you with a grin on his face. he mentioned the movie to you a little while ago, and how he just had to see how stupid it was eventually.
“why would we waste our time watching this shit? isn’t it supposed to be awful?” maya chimes from beside him, and your gaze narrows in on her.
“it’ll be funny, you know, ‘cause it’s so bad.” you reply, trying to keep your voice light and friendly.
she tilts her head to the side slightly, studying you with disapproving eyes. “yeah, i’m not so sure about trusting your taste. i mean, that god-awful outfit is just one example.”
the air seems to be sucked out of the room as you grip your sweats self-consciously. nobody moves, nobody speaks. you feel the anger flare up in your veins as you look at matt, wondering if he’s going to step in like he should.
but he doesn’t. in fact, he’s avoiding your gaze altogether. so you square your shoulders and turn your focus back to the girl you dislike so much. you’re done with the passive aggressive comments, with all of the bullshit glares and insults.
you’re done letting her bulldoze you. if matt wants to go through that, fine. but he doesn’t have to take everyone down with him by subjecting them to maya’s presence.
“well, you seem to be the only one who has a problem with my taste, so maybe you should just leave.” you say calmly, smiling sarcastically at the end because you can’t help it.
her mouth pops open, and you can hear chris and nick trying to stifle their gasps and chuckles. even the corner of matt’s lips turn up, which makes you wonder.
maya turns to look at her boyfriend, completely astonished. “are you seriously going to let her talk to me like that?”
he seems conflicted as he briefly looks your direction, clearing his throat to buy some time. you tilt an eyebrow, crossing your arms like you’re just waiting for him to pick his side.
she may have asked the question, but now you’re dying to know the answer.
“maya is right. and, uh, i think you should apologize.” matt fumbles with his words, unable to speak to you directly.
you feel the fury work its way up your face, and you force yourself to blink away the burning sensation of frustrated tears. maya looks far too satisfied, and you want to slap the smirk off of her face.
but you know you can’t lay hands on her, so you decide your words will have to be your knives.
“you know what, i am sorry,” you begin, raising your hands in surrender.
they’re both a bit surprised by this change in direction, so after a brief pause, you continue.
“i’m really sorry that you’re dating a stuck up bitch. i’m sorry that she’s constantly taking advantage of your kindness. i’m sorry that she treats you like shit, that she talks down to you like you’re a child, that she’s never satisfied with the things you do. and i’m especially sorry that you continue to let her, because you can do so much better.”
if maya’s eyeballs could pop out of her skull, you would imagine it would be exactly like how she looks right now. matt is also slack jawed beside her, and you can’t be near him any longer.
so you stand up, turning to leave the boy you love so much without another word.
the fresh night air of spring is a relief once you step out the front door, and you try to let it calm you as you hustle toward your car. you can already feel your phone buzzing in your back pocket as you move, presumably nick and chris.
you hope they’re not angry. it’s bad enough knowing that you’ve royally fucked things up with matt, but you couldn’t bare it if all three of them hated you.
you practically toss yourself into the drivers seat, slamming the door closed with a force that shakes the entire vehicle. you’re peeling out of the driveway before you can even reflect on the consequences of your actions, speeding home as if your life depended on it.
your ringtone continues to erupt as you drive along the backroads, but you force yourself to ignore it for the time being.
only once you throw the car into park in your own driveway do you check the messages, scrolling through the numerous notifications. unsurprisingly most of them are from nick and chris like you presumed, wondering if you’re alright and applauding you for finally standing up to the wicked witch of the west.
for a brief moment, their kind words make you feel better.
but then your eyes catch a contact that you actually don’t expect; matt’s. you stare at your device, throat going completely dry. a missed call and two texts.
matt
i’m coming over
don’t bother saying no, im already on my way
that was five minutes ago, which means he’s not too far behind you. you tear out of your car and across the yard, throwing the door open carelessly.
your heart is still slamming against your ribcage, and fear crawls up your throat as you press your back to the wood, kicking your flip flops off in the general direction of the coat rack.
your mind flashes to the idea of him yelling at you, which you suppose would be somewhat warranted. you’ve seen matt angry on a couple of occasions, and you can’t imagine he has anything kind to say to you right now.
you pace the foyer as you wait for his arrival, picking at the beds of your fingernails anxiously.
and then it happens; the loud knock on the front door, followed by another series of harsh slams.
impatient motherfucker.
you straighten up as your palm wraps around the knob, sucking in a breath before pulling it open to reveal a rather disheveled matt.
he’s breathing heavy, hair messy as if he’s been tugging at it for the entire drive. his earrings glint in the porch light as he stares at you like he’s trying to commit every feature to memory, wetting his lips hungrily.
“matt—”
you barely get his name out before he wraps his ring-clad fingers around your throat, pulling your mouth to his harshly. he molds against you perfectly, his other hand traveling to your hip to hold you flush against his own body.
he just couldn’t help it. he was so desperate on the entire ride over, replaying your outburst on a loop in his mind as he drove further and further away from his girlfriend. there’s been only a few occasions he’s seen you that upset, and your comments had been a necessary slap in the face.
plus, watching you fight for him when he was too much of a bitch to do it himself was a bigger turn-on than he’d like to admit.
all he’s ever wanted is you. and it shouldn’t have taken this long to admit it to himself.
matt guides you backwards, hand still squeezing your neck as he blindly kicks the door shut with one foot. you feel your back bump against the kitchen counter, and you’re trying to register what the hell is going on, but his kiss is so fucking intoxicating that it’s impossible to think clearly.
his tongue slides against yours passionately, and the flavored chapstick you’re wearing is driving him insane. you can feel him growing hard against your thigh as he toys with the elastic waistband of your pants suggestively.
you have no idea if this means it’s officially over with him and maya, but you find that you quite frankly don’t give a shit.
in this moment, he’s yours.
his fingers finally dip into your sweats a few seconds later, traveling down to brush against your clothed heat as he moves his mouth to your jaw sloppily. a breathy moan escapes before you can stop it, involuntarily rutting your hips against his cold rings in search of more friction.
one of your hands goes to grip the hair at the nape of his neck while the other claws at his back, desperately wrapping your knuckle around the cloth of his muscle tee.
“you like that?” matt grumbles against your throat, nipping at the skin as he begins to apply real pressure to your cunt in little circular motions.
your back arches and you tilt your head to the side so you can give him full access, silently hoping he’ll leave a mark behind.
“you’ve been thinking about me touching you like this, haven’t you? wishing i would come fuck you instead of her?” he questions further, moving his head slightly so he’s speaking directly into your ear.
the hand that was choking you slides down so he can grope your chest, his thumb running over one of your hardened nipples through the thin shirt you’re wearing. the combined pleasure has you whining in his grasp, a submissive sound that you wish you weren’t making.
you can feel him grinning as he presses his mouth to that sweet spot below your earlobe, his tongue darting out to wet the area.
“you want me just as much.” you manage to find your voice, though your claim is muttered with no conviction.
matt pauses his movements and brings both hands to your waistband again, which makes you whimper as you clench around nothing. his mouth finds yours briefly to swallow the sound, and he bites down on your bottom lip as he pulls away.
“you’re not wrong. so are you gonna give me what i want, baby?” he asks as he teases your sweats and panties just a little lower on your hips.
“keep going.” you plead.
you let go of your grip on his body so he can tug both items down to your ankles, helping you step out of their grasp before discarding them a couple feet away.
matt doesn’t immediately stand back up; instead he takes his time, kissing the side of your knees as his hands slide up the outside of your thighs. you feel so exposed, so on-display that you clench your legs together before you can help it.
he immediately pries them apart, shaking his head slightly with a little smirk. “don’t be shy now, you had so much to say earlier.”
his words spur you on, so you spread yourself wider, opting to grip the counter as he reattaches his lips to your inner thighs. matt inches closer and closer to where you really need him, taking his time to nip at the supple flesh that comes before.
he pulls away right when you think he’s finally about to put his mouth on you, letting his hot breath fan across your soaked center. it makes you shiver in anticipation, and you’re getting a little too needy now.
“quit fucking teas—oh shit.”
you throw your head back as his two fingers spread you apart, tongue coming in contact with the middle of your cunt as he laps at the wetness that had pooled there.
he slows his pace slightly after a moment, making sure to pay attention to the whole area, working his way up until his nose bumps against your clit. you spit a curse out, letting one hand go so you can grip his soft hair.
matt continues on, his lips closing around the sensitive bud so he can apply more pressure and suction. your gut flips at the sensation and your grip on his roots tightens as his mouth works.
he grumbles, loving the way you’re pulling at him so desperately. the noise sends vibrations through your core, which only makes the experience more enjoyable.
“fuckkk, matt, feels so good.” you praise dumbly, your words slurring.
the vocal admiration makes his pulse quicken, and at this point he’s straining against his jeans. he just can’t believe he’s got you like this, grinding your cunt against his face as if he’s the best you’ve ever had.
he can tell you’re growing closer just based on the little gasps and moans leaving your mouth, and your legs begin to shake ever so slightly. but he won’t let you finish just yet.
“want to be inside this pretty pussy.” he pulls away to say it, pressing one more wet kiss to the delicate area before he gets up.
you’re craving more, so you decide to take initiative, reaching for his belt and fumbling to undo the buckle. you tear it from the loops and toss it away, moving to his zipper as he reaches behind his head to tug his loose tank off.
his pants fall to the floor, leaving him in only his tented boxers. he’s quick to kick his shoes off, followed by his jeans right after.
then his hands go to your waist, fingers digging into the smooth flesh.
“up.” he instructs bluntly, helping lift you onto the end of the marbled countertop so he’s standing between your legs.
he lifts your shirt up next, and you help him out by throwing your arms above your head so he can fully remove it. his eyes train downwards, admiring the way your sheer bra hugs your tits. it hardly leaves anything to the imagination, and matt finds it extremely hot that you’ve been wearing it all night without him knowing.
before he can make a move, you surprise him by reaching back confidently to unhook the garment yourself. you let it slip from your shoulders before throwing it to your side, revealing your bare chest to him wordlessly.
he pulls his lip between his teeth as he exhales, gently guiding you downwards so your back is pressed flat against the cool surface. matt looks intimidating standing over you, his dark eyes drinking in every inch of your body.
“you’re so fucking sexy.” he says in awe, leaning down to give you another real kiss, a salty mix of sweat and arousal on his lips.
then he finds his way down to your collarbone, staying there shortly before traveling between the valley of your breasts. without warning, he presses his tongue flat across one nipple, flicking it back and forth.
you push your chest further into his face with a moan, both hands in his hair this time. he moves to the other perky bud, sucking on it as his teeth graze the tissue ever so slightly.
you’re practically writhing underneath him, and you can feel the pit growing in your stomach again. so even though it feels incredible, you yank his head back off of your chest by his hair.
“need you to fuck me.” you mutter, pushing his hair out of his face with both of your hands.
matt nods once, straightening so he can slide his underwear down. his erection finally springs free, pink tip glistening with precum. you watch as he spreads the wetness around, pumping himself in his hand a few times.
he’s bigger than you expected, and your mouth is watering just thinking about how much you want him to be pounding into you already.
“wrap your legs around me princess.” he commands gruffly, and you do just as you’re told, hooking your ankles behind his back.
his dick presses against your heat, and you buck against it to try and feel more. matt is quick to steady your hips roughly, holding you down against the edge of the counter as he teases himself into your entrance.
you both moan, his low and rumbling, yours high-pitched and greedy. you use your thighs to pull him closer, forcing him to drive into you fully so you can feel that pleasurable stretch.
“mmmn—fuck, you’re so tight.” he sighs, giving you another moment before he begins to drag his cock in and out at a steady pace.
you rock with him as best you can, finding the perfect rhythm so that he’s plowing his full length into you, filling the house with the sound of skin slapping skin.
matt lets one hand wrap around your neck again to choke you, tattoos on display as his muscles flex, and the pressure traps your lewd cries in your throat. his other fingers continue to toy with your nipples, which makes you arch off the counter, head rolled back as your eyes screw shut.
“look at you, taking me like such a good girl. just like i knew you would.” he compliments breathlessly.
he starts snapping his hips harder, enjoying the way your tits bounce as you slide slightly against the slick counter. you look so fucking beautiful, mouth partially open, barely able to squeak out a moan.
never in a million years did matt think he’d get the opportunity to fulfill all of his shamefully dirty fantasies about you, but here you are, completely naked and spread out in your own kitchen.
you’re squeezing around him now with every stroke, and he somehow keeps getting deeper, hitting your g-spot in a way that makes you jerk.
the familiar feeling of your abs tightening occurs as you get closer to your orgasm, and you swear you’re seeing stars at this point. he’s right there with you, a groaning mess as your fingers reach up to dig into his bicep.
“yes, matt, right there! m’gonna—” you fumble over your words, unable to finish the thought as the satisfaction builds.
he uses the last of his strength to drill into you, moving both hands back to your waist quickly so he can slam you down on his cock a few more times.
“come all over this dick baby, don’t hold back.”
you’re practically screaming his name as you hit your high, releasing all over him as his hot cum spills into you at the same time.
he slows his movements as you look up at him with bleary eyes, enjoying the last moments of being inside you before he pulls out. you feel your mixed arousal dripping out onto the counter, and you don’t even care that you’ll have to clean it up later.
that was completely worth the mess.
your chest continues to heave as you relish in the come down, dropping your thighs from his hips so he’s free to move around.
but matt stays between them, leaning down to capture your mouth with his one final time. it’s brief, but it means more than either of you truly understand.
he’s the one to break it first, pressing his forehead against yours before he speaks. “you’re incredible, you know that?”
you smile weakly, pushing against his chest to put some distance between the two of you. reality is creeping back in, reminding you that this was probably a one time thing.
“help me down?” you ask, and he complies.
matt lifts you a bit as you slide off the countertop, setting you back on real ground a second later. you’re not sure what to say as you stand before him, completely fucked out and terrified of whatever is coming next.
“so, um…i should probably get cleaned up.” you try to sound casual, even though you’re feeling anything but relaxed.
he immediately notices the switch in tone, the way you’re wrapping your arms around yourself like you’re trying to shrink away and hide. he’s also pretty sure he knows where this insecurity is coming from.
his fingers go to grip your chin gently, demanding that you look him in the face. your eyes widen as he brushes his thumb along your swollen bottom lip.
“i’m cutting things off with maya. i just…love you. and i’m sorry it took me so long.” matt finally admits.
it takes a second to click in your brain, but when it does a wide grin spreads across your face. butterflies erupt in your stomach, and you kiss the pad of his finger as he moves it along your mouth.
“i love you too, but i think you knew that already.” you tease playfully.
“yeah, maybe. but i like hearing you say it out loud.”
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sugarandspicewriting · 5 months ago
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Jealousy, Jealousy!
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Summary: You're approached by someone at the bar. How do they react?
Warnings: 800 words. Mentions of insecurities on Marcille's part.
A/N: These were starting to rot in my google docs so enjoy!
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Laios
girl
Congratulations on getting this man to understand that you are interested in a monogamous romantic relationship with him and got him to agree. The hardest part is over.
If he sees you having a conversation with someone it’s unlikely he’ll care. Unless they’re beastkin or some type of monster hybrid then he’ll care.
Even if he’s standing there with you and blatantly hitting on you he’ll probably say something like “yeah aren’t they so cool :) “
Sighs
It’s far more likely that you’ll be the one experiencing jealousy in the relationship since he's just as oblivious about people flirting with him than he is people flirting with you.
Marcille
She is the one who gets jealous in a very obvious way but at the same time is the one who will most vehemently deny it. 
You're having a polite conversation with an adventurer about your respective experiences in dungeons and you can almost feel her pouting at you.
When you turn to look at she has the same face she makes when Laios has a meal recommendation.
Disgust and general upsetness.
Marcille hates that she feels this way, but her insecurities always get the better of her, especially if you're a short lived race.
She already has so little time with you in this world, and she's loath to share it.
As much as she wants to, it’s unlikely that she’ll interrupt the conversation. If she sees that whoever you’re speaking to is making you uncomfortable she’ll step in but she’ll most likely just sit and pout into her food.
When you go home, she’s unusually quiet.
Unless you’re the kind of person that’s completely oblivious to other people's feelings, you’ll understand what’s going on.
The best course of action is to gently remind her that you love her and that you want to spend your life by her side, no matter how long it is.
Kabru
Somehow turns it into an opportunity to gain information
You’re chatting away and all of a sudden he’s sliding next to you and putting his hand on you somewhere and he’s doing that smile he does at the other person that tells you that he’s about to get this person's life story
If you’re introverted this could be a blessing, because he can honestly just take over the conversation from there. Kabru will buy you a drink for your troubles and you can sit there and sip while they yap.
If the person is actually interested in you the interaction will become hostile but only in its undertones.
Kabru has invested too much time and energy into being seen as kind and charming and he doesn’t want to wreck it.
He’ll start saying things like ““It’s very crowded here. Do you think anyone would notice if someone disappeared?”
“I think red is your color. Would you want to wear some soon?” 
Okay weirdo (affectionately) 
Hopefully the person he’s talking to gets the hint. If they don’t he’ll make up some excuse to remove both of you from the situation. 
Mithrun
He leans more towards possessiveness rather than jealousy.
If someone is talking to you and he doesn’t like it he will simply grab you or the offender and teleport away.
Which one he grabs depends on how aggressive he deemed them to be
If it's just a normal conversation he’ll teleport you away outside the bar. It’s pretty irritating especially if you were enjoying yourself or you were getting good information. Threaten to make him sleep on the couch. He’ll say he’s sorry but he will absolutely do it again. 
If he decides your conversation partner is being flirty with you, you’ll sense his anger without even seeing him  just before he disappears with them.
When he makes his way back you angrily ask what he’s done. He tells you he just gave them a stern talking to. Yeah sure. That person is never seen again and he receives a strongly worded message from Pattadol everytime it happens.
You should probably actually make him sleep on the couch.
Thistle
Thistle does not get jealous because he has no reason to.
No one in the Golden Kingdom is dumb enough to try and invoke his wrath especially when it comes to you.
You’re all he has left after Delgal disappeared.
Similar to Mithrun, he’s more possessive than jealous.
If he is spending time with you, he expects to have 100% of your attention.
He took a break on searching for Delgal to come and see you because he loves (is dangerously obsessed) with you! Don’t you appreciate it! Love him!
Even before the mess with Delgal when he was still a jester, I can’t imagine him being jealous.
He’s got such a one track mind, focusing on your happiness and Delgal’s, he wouldn’t really notice anyone else.
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theragethatisdesire · 1 year ago
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aot men as dads - headcanon!! some 18+!!
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includes: eren, jean, reiner, & levi
i'm still working on some full-fledged one-shots and parts of my series', but i'm nannying for the summer and have BABY FEVER. please enjoy my little headcanons of my fav aot men as dads <3
DISCLAIMER: some of this post contains MATURE CONTENT that is intended only for those over 18. if you are a minor, please do not read below the cut.
Eren
ok but eren is such a cringe dad lol
buys himself all of the #1 Dad! merch. he’s got mugs, tshirts, hats, all of it, and all of it went on his credit card.
10000% a girl dad. loves all the little dresses and bows; he puts your daughter’s hair in its first bun, nearly tears up when she points at his matching hairstyle and babbles “like da-da!”
you have to parent eren as much as the children. when you turn the corner into the living room where he’s supposed to be having “quiet time” with your toddler only to find that they’re buried in a pillow fort and eren’s signed his own name in crayon on the wall next to your daughter’s scribblings. “babe, we can just repaint it! she’s being creative.”
loves when you’re pregnant. after your first, eren keeps a calendar on the wall marking off the days until it’s safe for him to fuck you again, fuck a baby right back into you. already has a breeding kink before your first. develops a lactation kink after.
TERRIFIED (and i mean terrified) of hurting your little angel. has absolutely zero concept of “cry it out”; if he hears his baby crying, he’s sprinting into the next room, kissing a nonexistent boo-boo.
refuses to admit it but he has no backbone when it comes to your daughter wanting literally anything. she wants it, she gets it.
favorite thing in the world is matching outfits. favorite. “babe, where’s her green hoodie? i’m wearing mine today for the park!” “of course it matters, we have to match! on that note, where’s yours?”
lets your daughter use his hair to learn how to braid. usually has a few pink hair ties or glittery clips sticking out of it when you come home from a mom’s night out.
really big on your baby getting to see the world. drags you on vacation to any place he can think of, even as you try to explain to him that she can’t form any long term memories yet. “but baby, she’ll have pictures. how many kids in her class can bring a picture of them at the eiffel tower to their first show-and-tell?”
accidentally ruins santa and the tooth fairy for your daughter. cries harder than she does over it.
aggressively vets babysitters. ends up settling for a nursing student in the labor & delivery school who’s the oldest of seven children and probably more knowledgeable about child development than both of you combined, but he’s still suspicious.
wants to watch while you push, watch his baby come into the world. you’ve never seen a sweeter sight than eren in his scrubs, crying while holding your baby girl.
Jean
most people picture eren as being the roughhousing dad, but it’s jean, and i will die on this hill.
freaks out every time he drops your first boy while throwing him around like a ragdoll, but he’ll never stop because “listen!! he’s laughing!”. when it comes to the rest of them, he’s experienced enough now to tell the difference between a real booboo and an imagined one, and he simply brushes their little pants off caringly before shouting “now you tackle me!”
jean’s got no gender preference for your first, or the rest of your little brood for that matter. he raises them exactly the same, regardless: tough.
it takes him awhile to get used to the concept of babies’ minds. you’ve walked in on him having full-blown arguments with your shrieking toddlers several times. “what’s not making sense? if you let your goldfish ‘swim’ in the toilet, it dies, simple as that.”
plays “bad cop” for you because you’re terrible at it, but he’s always having to turn around and snicker into his elbow in the middle of scolding because your babies get the same little throbbing forehead vein as you when they’re mad
wants a big family, and gets it. you practically have to drag him to get his balls snipped after your fourth, him reminding you that “it’s reversible!” the entire way there.
the newborn phase is his favorite. he’s rarely home for any longer than ten minutes without scooping your most recent addition into his arms, squishing their little cheeks and marveling at their gurgling noises.
the kids never give him anxiety, but when you’re pregnant??? jean’s a wreck.
“do your feet still hurt, love?” “what do you mean you have indigestion? that could be the baby coming!” “of course we can’t have sex, what if we poke its little head?”
definitely the dad that’s got a delivery bag and a backup bag and an emergency third backup of the backup bag in his car at all times. the first week of your third trimester, he starts watching you suspiciously for any signs of labor, even though this is your fourth together. you think you’ve got it down by now, you tell him, but he won’t listen.
always gets the kids to work together on little surprises for you. every mother’s day they wake you up with breakfast, every valentines day your dining room table is covered in handmade cards, every birthday your kitchen is coated in flour from jean and four little ones attempting to bake
SO HARD to drag him out for a date night. he wants to bring them everywhere: the fancy restaurant, the couples' get away trip
jean's that dad standing in the bar, watching the game, beer in hand, with an occupied baby carrier strapped to his chest
wants to watch during delivery, but he passed out the first go-round, so now he’s content standing up by your head, trying not to turn white as you squeeze his hand hard enough to break.
talks you into just one more on your fourth’s second birthday. “they’re all so big now. don’t you miss it, babe? my baby in your belly? c’mon…” turns out he reversed that vasectomy without telling you
Reiner
another girl dad. hardcore girl dad.
buys his little princess all number of dresses and barbies, is confused when she’s more interested in the baseballs her classmates have.
accidentally raises the most tomboyish, toughest little girl. still babies her, and she hates it.
cries more than you do on your first date night out when you leave her with your mom. forgets to order his entree at the restaurant because he’s watching the baby monitor app on his phone.
definitely the best at splitting baby duties with you. reiner’s up before you most nights when she wakes, grabbing a bottle and cooing at her lovingly even as she screams. you always try to stay awake to watch him on the baby monitor, though, heart melting as his massive arms rock the tiny bundle back to sleep.
all the neighborhood kids love him because of his size. at every cookout, reiner can’t help on the grill because he’s buried in the grass in a little army of toddlers, led by your daughter, shrieking with joy.
always taking pictures. literally always. unflattering ones when you fall asleep breastfeeding, candids at the zoo, eighteen identical pictures of the lock of hair from her first haircut clogging up his camera roll.
can’t be the bad cop. literally ever. he just can’t say no to his little princess, can’t break her precious little heart by telling her that throwing her food onto the floor is bad.
takes your daughter to mommy & me classes with him
DILF DILF DILF. all the moms in the classes swoon over him and gossip about him when he’s not there; much to your annoyance, reiner never notices, insisting that they’re his “mommy friends”.
always sporting a little bit of glitter on his face or a sticker on his back from your daughter
coming from a fatherless background, reiner nearly kills himself trying to be a constant presence in your daughter’s life (you have to remind him that he has to rest too)
never misses an open house night at school, even if it nearly gets him fired. coaches all of her sports teams. literally almost cries when she makes her first soccer goal. actually does cry when she tells you the boy sitting beside her in class called her his girlfriend. full-blown breakdown on her first day of school, so bad he has to stay home from work.
the absolute BEST through your pregnancy and delivery. always cooking your craving of the week, constant foot and back rubs, stays up all night with you for the three days before the birth when you’re just too swollen and miserable to sleep.
holds your hand through the entire delivery, gets in the doctors’ way when they’re performing checkups because “i’m her father, i need to know what’s going on”
Levi
levi never pictured himself as having children, but when your little surprise arrives, blinking up at levi with his own grey, owlish eyes, levi can’t believe he hadn’t thought of it sooner.
very easily irritated with anyone asking questions about your home life.
when his coworkers ask for your newborn’s name, levi simply says “child.” are you two trying again? “why the fuck do you need to know?”
super overprotective. your baby waves at someone in the supermarket, and levi’s leaning down to explain (in words your eight-month-old can’t yet understand) stranger danger.
totally one of those parents that goes half-crazy trying to get their child into the top-notch, snobby preschool in town.
“we’re not wasting his intelligence on the public school”
levi grew up with basically nothing, so he goes all out buying the best baby products on the market. $2,500 strollers, researching “best baby toys for development”, the whole nine yards.
100% spends months trying to get your child to make a game out of picking up his own toys after playtime, but it never works.
has a meal plan for your child to “optimize nutrition” that you have to sneak around to give your baby little chocolates and junk snacks.
“why are there pringles in his playtime bag? they have no nutritional value.”
vets anyone that comes around your child, even other children. “no more playtime with that evan kid. he’s always got a cold or something.”
he’s always been a light sleeper, but once you have your child, levi snores beside them watching kids’ cartoons on the tv like you’ve never seen him, even drooling as his head lolls, arm tucked tight around your little one.
learned everything he could about labor and delivery beforehand
you almost killed him in the delivery room as he explained each medical detail of your labor symptoms to “reassure” you. he finally got the hint when you threatened to decapitate him.
he thinks it’s shameful, but watching you be a mother turns. him. on. 
wants to take you right there when he catches you breastfeeding, watches you read a bedtime story, spin your child around laughing. you’re just so naturally good at it and it makes him love you all the more, all that love going straight between his legs.
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hauntedjellyfishwitch-blog · 3 months ago
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Famous Last Words
Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader (No use of Y/N)
Summary: She'll never let him believe he isn't loved, even when he doesn't deserve it.
TW: None.
“Be careful. I love you”
She hears the snort of derision he lets out and resists the urge to roll her eyes at him lest she makes things worse. He’s like a cornered animal when he’s upset, all consuming anger to cover the vulnerability he doesn’t want to acknowledge exists. She’s worried the wrong move will make him tell her to ‘fuck off an’ then fuck off som’ more’ like he had the night before.
“Though’ ya were mad at me” He grunts, scuffing the toe of his boot in the pebble-dashed dirt, other leg poised to keep moving further away from her and closer to the run he’s supposed to be going on.
“I am mad at you, you’re mad at me too” She raises an eyebrow before scanning her eyes down, taking note of the way he’s picking at the skin of his thumb; a nervous habit he’s had the whole time she’s known him. He’s nervous, as if one fight will make her leave him, as if she’s going to suddenly realise he isn’t worth the effort. She huffs a small, understanding smile at him “I still love you, and I’m never going to risk that not being the last thing you hear me say”
He pauses at the gate, tilts his head to the side and looks at her properly, sees the way she’s looking at him wide eyed and concerned, the way her shoulders are tense. Whenever they fight he convinces himself he’s being left, talks himself into thinking she doesn’t care and here she is, mad at him, fighting with him and still refusing to let him believe she doesn’t whilst being scared he won’t come back for different reasons.
He strides forward suddenly, twisting his body to close the gap between them and slings an arm around her shoulder, bringing her in to press his lips to the top of her head. He lingers, lips against the hair he loves so much.
“I love ya”
“Be careful. I love you” She repeats, knowing the words have sunk in when he raises one side of a lip fleetingly before opening the clanking metal chain.
-
It was a stupid fight, in hindsight, the kind they probably wouldn’t have if anyone had eaten a full meal for dinner rather than whatever percentage of rabbit there was split between twelve people. Or maybe they would, because they could have twelve rabbits and Daryl would still give his up for someone else, and it would infuriate her just the same that he sacrifices his own wellbeing for them at every opportunity. She suspects it’s only half about taking care of others, and maybe a solid thirty percent just not thinking he deserves care; the other twenty percent she is entirely unwilling to examine.
It was a fight though, one that ought to have been kinder than it was. One that she wishes she could have kept her cool in, but she’ll be fucked if Daryl is the only one who gets to be angry. She stews on it, sitting perched on the solid prison cot, playing it over and over in her mind until she hears heavy footsteps outside the makeshift door. She’d recognise them anywhere, his distinctive gait and well-worn shoes that always scrape on the second step when he’s not trying to sneak. The consideration, even in his unconscious actions, is part of the reason she loves him as fiercely as she does.
She doesn’t get up, doesn’t allow herself to follow the overwhelming urge to rush towards him when he opens the bars and lifts aside the curtain. He bites the inside of his lip.
“’M sorry”
“Me too”
She moves then, coming to a stop in front of him to run her hands over the solid muscles under his shirt, checking him for cuts and scrapes, feels him exhale underneath her palms. He’s always taken by the act, no matter how long they’ve been together or how often he goes out. He remains captured by the tenderness and care she bestows upon him. He is, still, so unused to the kindness, so out of depth when the only gentleness he’s known has been a cover for malice, false sense of security so quickly followed by pain.
“Ain’t sure what I did t’ deserve ya love” He mumbles into the same spot on the crown of her head. The spot he kisses when he fucks her, the place his chin rests when he hugs her after a long day, the spot he’d patted condescendingly when he was too embarrassed to admit he liked her but needed an excuse to make contact.
Finally, after almost twenty four hours of not making contact, at least twenty three too long, she kisses him, presses her lips firmly to his, relishing the way he instantly responds. When she pulls away it’s with a smile, an always fucking present smile he’ll never get enough of, the smile that’s his.
“You don’t have to deserve it, you don’t have to earn it, its just there”
He eats more that night, sitting by the fire running a thumb soothingly on her knee as he takes a well earned swig from a bottle of water. He wants her to see it, wants her to know he's trying; and if he has to trick himself into it by thinking it's for her, caring for himself because she needs him to, then it'll have to do for now.
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ariariari-freehounreal · 1 year ago
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GLaDOS is not Chells mom, she’s not LIKE a mom to Chell, I swear to god this is the dumbest fucking theory/headcanon ever bc it literally just disregards EVERYTHING Chell and GLaDOS went through together and their development.
GLaDOS hated Chell because she was a human and humans made her and hurt her and even if she didn’t have her memories of Caroline she hated them for what they did to her as GLaDOS.
In portal 2 GLaDOS slowly realizes how much they have in common and how their goals are similar.
GLaDOS wants to test, she wants control, she wants to do what she wants. She’s never had that freedom. When she was alive she worked for a male majority company that took advantage of her and worked under a man who was like the fucking embodiment of evil. She admired him and he betrayed her and took away her autonomy and he didn’t care at all. When she was woken up as GLaDOS the scientists attached tumors to her to try to make her behave so that they could control her. Everyone was always trying to control her.
Chell wants to be free to live her life the way that she wants to, no matter how uncertain or how dangerous, all she wants is to live on her own terms. She’s been tested on like an animal by an omnipotent murderous computer since she woke up, forced to do intense laborious activities with no break. Then she’s betrayed by the only motherfucker that didn’t try to kill her. She’s betrayed by a man, who tries to take away her autonomy for the sake of self fulfillment (sounds familiar).
Throughout the game GLaDOS realizes this and by the end she understands that by forcing Chell to stay with her and test she’s doing the exact same thing as her oppressors. They’re both trapped in the facility, forced to carry out tasks against their will. They both just want to be free.
So GLaDOS lies about Caroline being deleted and let’s Chell go. Even if it means she’ll still be trapped, and now alone in her suffering. She gives Chell the chance she’s never had despite her own feelings.
Also it’s mega, incredibly queercoded like the entire time. All of the songs are mega gay. ALL of them.
Okay sorry if this literally made 0 sense I just woke up okay byeeee
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brittle-doughie · 7 months ago
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Hello!! Im new to this blog and I really wanna interact ;3
So, I kinda remembering this request....
So I was thinking,
What if the (other) Ancients (and maybe even legendaries) also break/took off pieces of their body to make the desert and gave it to Y/N too?
You can do this if you want of course!! :3 (I hope Tumblr doesn't eat my request AGAIN)
Dessert Report (The Ancient Cookies)
Warning: Cookie Cannibalism
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Customer: Pure Vanilla Cookie
Treat Gift: A cake slice dabbled with vanilla frosting.
Result: Portions of hair missing, hat has to be angled to hide the missing parts.
Pure Vanilla entered the cake shop one afternoon after leaving with White Lily Cookie the other day. He talked about seeing White Lily’s gift to Y/N Cookie and thought it was a wonderful idea. Questions raised about his odd hat angled were dodged or given no answer, unusual for the Ancient.
What Y/N Cookie doesn’t know won’t hurt them, right? They would still be close to Pure Vanilla no matter what, right?
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Customer: Hollyberry Cookie
Treat Gift: Berry cluster cookies.
Result: Parts of the arms missing, outfit helps to obscure the cracks.
Hollyberry was among the first of the Ancients to give a tasty delight to her very good friend, Y/N Cookie. But just any dessert wouldn’t do for Hollyberry’s liking. It had to mean something, that it truly came from the bottom of her heart. She had an idea…
Y/N Cookie will surely love it…..
They would surely love her….
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Customer: Dark Cacao Cookie
Treat Gift: Box of chocolates made from pure cacao.
Result: Missing small extremities such as parts of the hands or legs. Like with Hollyberry, his outfit can cover up the missing portions.
Loyalty, something that is earned and deeply valued to Dark Cacao Cookie. Y/N Cookie’s loyalty to him as an ally means a lot to the king. Dark Cacao Cookie felt like he needed to return the favor to Y/N Cookie, to show how much he valued their relationship.
No length is too great for the sake of those you care about, as he entered the cake shop with the chocolates showed…
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Customer: Golden Cheese Cookie
Treat Gift: An array of cheeses with a cheesecake made by Golden Cheese herself.
Result: Portions of the arms and legs missing. Bandages are used to hide the missing parts, excused as just her protecting her dough from getting too stale.
Golden Cheese was never the same after the fall of her kingdom. She held onto anything she held dear, fearing they’ll crumble to dust before her eyes. Y/N Cookie was one major example, she treated them as if she’s known them all her life..and someone she wishes to know for the rest of her life.
She wants to live knowing that a part of her will always remain within Y/N Cookie forever when she floated through that cake shop door…
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Customer: White Lily Cookie
Treat Gift: Lily Cobbler.
Result: The loss of the lower arms, part of the waist, and small portions of the head and hair. The cobbler had traces of a powder-like substance emanating from it.
White Lily Cookie cared about Y/N Cookie. She cared about them very much. She feels like they understand her more the average cookie, it’s no surprise why she’ll often seek their company. When she spotted them enjoying a gifted treat one day, she had a wonderful idea on how she wanted to express her feelings to them.
It was quite the extensive process, but she was able to complete her gift. The loss of her parts can grow back, it would all be worth it when Y/N Cookie enjoyed the cobbler, with White Lily knowing that a part of her will always be with Y/N Cookie.
White Lily went further than Golden Cheese though. More than just physical pieces of dessert that will eventually disappear in time. White Lily placed a little more thought into her treat…
Life Powder, what makes up a cookie’s soul…
A part of her will always be with Y/N Cookie…
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celuere · 1 month ago
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I don't know if you have done this already, but could you do hc of vampire Arlecchino? I literally can't stop thinking about this.
Been on a Vampire!Arle brainrot for the last days and UGHHHHHHHHHHJJ DMMNKANDNQND the way she can suck me DRY. Like in my poll I did a few weeks back about what I should write next, I mentioned the option of a Vampire!Arle x Hunter!reader and let me indulge you in my scheming and what you can expect.
Most Vampire Hunter works I’ve read, they somehow always end up being human. Barely a match for a vampire BUT what speaks against another mythical creature hunting for the blood suckers? A Fae for example?
Now, Fae‘s are- well, Faeries just without the wings. Possessing over the same supernatural abilities of a vampire along with a wide range of elemental powers, light/shadow manipulation etc. and over a VERY long lifespan. Known to be unnaturally beautiful beings and their blood-
Their blood is known to be absolutely delectable.
So there is the Hunter Organization of the Fae and the Fatui Clan. The oldest and most dangerous Vampire Clan with its eleven Fatui Harbingers, Arle being a human-turned-vampire through the Tsaritsa and NOW I can get to my headcanons. I sadly can’t go into much details or else I would spoil the plot of my Vampire Arle work💔
slightly suggestive, MDNI
Still hosting the HotH, the orphans being either Vampire fledglings or human children which she had to turn in order for them to survive. She helps them accustom to their life for example how to control and manage their bloodthirst, how to choose their prey correctly and feast on them without killing them accidentally.
Now, since Vampires age completely different than humans, I’d say Arle would have the physical appearance of a 35 yo old woman while already being +1000 years old, meaning she counts as an ancient Vampire already
Actually rarely goes hunting for human blood and prefers animals, but since their blood isn’t as nutritious as human blood, she has to drink way more often than her colleagues. Sometimes if she DOES get hungry for something other than animals she goes out and snatches the first pretty thing on the street she can find.
She‘s a good drinker. Making sure the victim is passed out and buries her fangs into a spot that’s less hurtful, she might be a monster but that doesn’t mean she has to act like one.
Oh but when she gets her hands on the pretty hunter fae that’s been on her ass for the past decades… she may never want anything else. (I don’t wanna spoiler too much😌)
Vampire‘s have their own laws. Some of them for example is that they have a STRICT hierarchy and I mean STRICT. Like an ordinary dude disrespecting her out of nowhere? That‘s a dead man. That also means that the head of the Fatui Clan - the Tsaritsa - has utmost authority. Her word IS the law. That’s not even something Arlecchino wants to defy… well maybe she’ll make an exception for you.
She is possessive of her prey. I mean that with all my heart. Once a Vampire claimed ownership over a certain individual, it‘s by Vampire law their very own property. Any inappropriate approaches by someone else of her kind is deemed hostile and she IS allowed to get rid of them, no matter their status. And she will.
I think I’d be funny to see her turn into a cute little bat. She‘d be so adorable.
She does frown at Childe whenever he just takes a drink in front of her, like no- she doesn’t wanna see that.
But on the other she could not care LESS if Columbina is sitting in front of her and drinking her third man of the day dry. Nuh uh, she doesn’t drink from pretty ladies, she thinks they’re too precious.
A teasing little shit when she gets to have a taste of you. Having you neatly seated in her lap, bare neck exposed to her- goodness you look beautiful when you wait for her to get a drink of you.
Her hands CANNOT stay in one place once she sunk her teeth into your skin. Grabbing onto your hips, then the next they’re running through your hair, opening up your ponytail so she can grab a better handful to tug your head back.
She‘d never just drink from one spot. After your neck she‘d take your hand gently into hers and guides it up to her lips before she buries her fangs into your wrist. Crossed-pupils always watching you, analyzing you before you eventually grow limp from her intake of blood, that’s when she‘ll stop.
She‘d get a drink by biting straight into your tit or your inner thigh but maybe that’s just me.
Afterwards she‘d clean up the bloody bite marks and gently lay you down on your bed, filling you up a glass of strawberry juice (lots of iron, good for your blood) and place it with a bowl of oatmeal on your nightstand. She is caring like that.
If you can’t tell I’m very obsessed with the idea. Sedate me please.
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shaunamilfman · 7 months ago
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Dating Vault Dweller Lucy MacLean
never written anything but yellowjackets before but her girlfailure energy and complete lack of skills has entranced me
insists on giving you a tour of her vault. you could see everything interesting just from standing and turning in a circle, but she just has to show you all the “best spots”. it's just corners with interesting cracks in them. 
takes you on little picnic dates because she read about them in her book club once. sitting around in the field eating canned tuna while people work around you but she's having a great fucking time. you've never seen her smile more. 
big-time yapper. can talk for hours about the most niche topics if you let her. by the time she's done you can name almost every major player in some small skirmish 300 years ago. she gets so excited when she notices you're paying attention to whatever she's talking about. The girl just lights up and talks so fast you've got to ask her to slow down
if you didn't like reading before you'd better learn to love it because you will be joining that bookclub. by the time you've gotten around to reading it Lucy's pretty much spoiled the whole thing by accident. she just wants someone to talk about the exciting bits with and gets ahead of herself. sheepishly avoids eye contact when you put the book down and sigh. 
she likes when you're good at things but lowkey resents when you're better at something than she is. you beat her out in riflery and she has such a strained smile when congratulating you on it. she hates not being good at something so much that she feels guilty for it. 
definitely said “Golly!” after your first kiss
loves to sit around on your bed and watch you get ready. it takes all of five seconds to get your outfit on but she insists it's one of the best parts of her day.
insists on showering together to “save water”. always gets a little handsy but still rushes you out on time because she feels bad at the idea of wasting water. 
Lucy wants to do anything and everything she can for you. she wants to impress you and show you how much she brings to the table, and the habit kind of just stays even after your relationship is well established. She takes a lot of pride in her skills and what better use for them than making life easier for her partner. 
So easily won over by praise. No matter how sad or upset she is, you can always cheer her up at least a little by telling her how smart or good at something she is. 
cannot be suave or subtle no matter how hard she tries. and she does, a lot. tries to hit you up with a one liner and tells the punch line first. tries to lean against the wall and stumbles face-first into it. makes you dinner and trips over the edge of a rug and drops it on your shoes. you just make her so nervous.
she's so blunt that it leads to the most awkward situations, but you almost prefer it to the havoc she brings when she purposely tries to be charming. 
cannot lie to save her life. she’ll definitely try if it means sparing your feelings but she's so obviously lying that it doesn’t matter much. all “wow… you did such a good job!” but she’s choking it out and cannot meet your eyes.
she's so attached to you. would follow you from room to room all day if she could get away with it. she needs such constant affection and gives so much in return that it's a little overwhelming at first.
definitely the type to lick her thumb and try to rub the dirt off your forehead with it. she's so embarrassing, honestly. fiddles with your clothes to make sure they're presentable. you're going to dinner with 20 other people all wearing the same outfit, but god forbid yours is a little wrinkly. 
you can always tell when she wants you to do something romantic for her because she'll leave out your nicest jumpsuit for you to wear as a hint. 
catches you watching her fix pipes and assumes you want to learn instead of just ogling her. tries to explain it and you're like “yeah? that's crazy…” till she finally gets the hint. always looks so proud when she realizes you find her attractive, even after you've been together for a while. 
lowers your guard with the most innocent-looking smile and then suddenly says “we should have sex” with all the subtlety of a train wreck. that awkward bluntness rearing its head again. can always trust Lucy to say the quiet part out loud. 
loves to flirt with you but she is so bad at it. doesn't recognize the fact that she's bad at it either. hits you up with the worst fucking line known to man and looks so quietly smug about it. 
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the-oblivious-writer · 8 months ago
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Too Sweet
Wednesday Addams x Reader
Drabble
Summary: You and Wednesday were simply night and day, contrasting personalities preventing any chance of pursuit
Warning(s): No dialogue, pining!Wednesday, & no pronouns but the word 'goddess' is used once
Notes: Based off of 'Too Sweet' by the lovely Andrew Hozier, this song feels wenclair coded - hopefully I get the energy to edit them to it one day. This is my first time writing for Wednesday, so constructive criticism is more than welcome, and much appreciated! 🙏 (as it always is)
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Wednesday despised you. She loathed every fiber of your being, every word you spoke, every path you chose. Yet no matter how deep her hatred for you ran, it was all out of pure spite.
You were close friends with Enid, so inevitably that meant you and Wednesday often found yourselves in the same atmosphere. Sometimes you and Enid would have sleepovers and it did not take long for Wednesday to discover you were an early bird opposed to her late night writing sessions. 
You always looked so peaceful while resting. How do you sleep so well? Wednesday wondered. What do you dream about? It’s silly and utterly ridiculous, she knows. But her mind can’t help but stray when it comes to you. You have shown your own concern when it comes to the Addams’ erratic sleep schedule, if you could even classify it as one. You have always said to others—including Wednesday—to live right, to go to bed before the daylight. 
You wake up to watch the sunrise;  it was repulsing how rottenly pure that is. You were drunk on life, a poet—but far from Wednesday’s brand. You had a bright perspective; it was naive, yet wholesome. Your poetry revolves around the optimistic, steadfast side of life—while Wednesday’s consists of more realistic themes such as death, betrayal, and eternal heartbreak. It was a drastic contrast.
Wednesday could never bear such a naive way of life, so she simply doesn’t understand how you do. It was such a frustrating thought, the way you went about. Don’t you just want to wake up dark as a lake, smelling like a bonfire, lost in a haze? You lived such a reserved life in her eyes; treating your mouth as if it's heaven’s gate, your body like it’s the TSA. 
She wasn’t oblivious to the glances you spared her; it was an internal battle refusing to meet them. But there were consequences. Wednesday has seen horrific things, things she believes would force a person like you into abandoning their wide-eyed outlook on life; she refuses to be the one who corrupts you. She wishes she could go along, don’t get her wrong. You were a goddess on earth, inside and out; bright as the morning, as soft as the rain, pretty as a vine, as sweet as a grape. Tooth rotting was what you were, but Wednesday did always deem herself a masochist. 
If you can sit in a barrel, maybe she’ll wait. But until that day, she’d rather take her whiskey neat, raw as the honey in your tea, and coffee black as the ink you use to craft your sugar coated poems. Your sweetness was too overwhelming for her to carry, the looks you gave her alone were laced in your perfection. 
Everything pointed to the evident conclusion; you’re too sweet for her.
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A/N: I feel eh abt this one, but I need to experiment with Wednesday more if I wanna get used to writing for her
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angelanderson · 1 year ago
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DOM!ABBY ANDERSON HEADCANNONS
cw: dom!abby (soft & mean), both receiving, fluffy too :) u mostly decide if au or not. minors dni. 18+ under cut
── ⋅⋅⋅ ────꒰ ୨ ♡ ୧ ꒱──────────
♡ dom!abby who loves causal dominance.
she’ll gently redirect you when you’re not paying attention to something important. “pretty girl, i’m talking to you.” a kiss on the forehead ensues if you whine out of embarrassment.
night out with drinking? she’s keeping her eyes on you. she definitely grips your chin as she pours water into your mouth. ”don’t need you hungover tomorrow.
refuses to let you grab anything off high shelves after an incident involving glass. “just need someone bigger, don’t you?”
♡ dom!abby who doesn’t care if you call her mommy, daddy, or just abby. she just loves to hear you call out and moan for her. she swears your voice sounds like honey to her ears.
♡ mean dom!abby who definitely loves it when you cry. she’ll coo and wipe your tears away as each thrust of her strap feels bruising. she doesn’t think she’s fucked you good enough without tears when she’s in that mood.
♡ soft dom!abby who loves to have you in her lap while she overstimulates you, shushing your whines with gentle kisses. “oh, baby, you’re doing so good. gonna cum again for me?”
♡ dom!abby who rarely puts up with any bratty behavior. three strikes and you’re out. she knows you can be sweet again once she’s done with you— even if it takes all night. she’s always proven she’s not afraid to punish you.
soft!dom abby will edge you until you’re in tears, begging her to let you cum. she’ll tell you to apologize and then maybe she’ll let you cum. “gonna apologize now, yeah? gonna be good for me?”
mean dom!abby will smack your ass red before she’s fucks you from behind with your least favorite strap— it’s not thick or long enough to really get you there. “you wanna cum? then this strap is all you get. bad girls don’t get what they want, so get to it baby.”
♡ dom!abby shoves her fingers in your mouth when you won’t shut up. “baby, i’m busy. suck on my fingers and shut up.” she’ll shove her fingers in further if you try to respond to her.
♡ dom!abby’s strength kink goes hard. being a gym rat pays off in more ways than one. she likes to fuck you against walls, holding all of your weight up with just her arms. she’s the kind of woman to bounce you up and down with her hands on your hips when you whine about being tired while riding her.
♡ dom!abby pulls your hair when you’re eating her out before shoving your face in more. she loves to watch you get all messy as you become more and more pussy drunk. “my messy girl. doing so good for me.”
♡ dom!abby likes to have you on your knees while you eat her out. she loves the way watching your on your knees makes her feel. abby swears the orgasm is ten times better when she has you like that. you also get ten times the praise.
♡ dom!abby loves to tie you up and stick a vibrator in you. especially when you’re pleasing her; she likes to see if you can cum at the same time.
♡ dom!abby loves teasing you. lazily teasing your bud with her fingers, making you beg her to do more. she knows you like it based on how much more wet you get when she does it. “good girls are patient. patient girls get good things,” is all she’ll tell you before she starts up again.
♡ dom!abby knows how to make you feel good like she knows the back of her hand. she’s sure she could have you cumming in under five minutes if she didn’t enjoy the long game as much as she does. she usually has you cumming at least twice every time. “not a good girlfriend if i don’t have my girl completely blissed out after every. single. time.”
♡ dom!abby who whispers how much she loves you into your ear as she slowly takes you apart with her fingers, tongue, and toys. she always tells you how much she adores you no matter what mood you’re both in. she can never hold in a coo when you tell her the same things back.
♡ dom!abby who drops the role the second it’s time for aftercare. she always kisses you on your forehead before she gets you water, a washcloth, and your favorite fuzzy robe. she holds you in her arms, one arm arm rubbing your back on the days you need to be lulled to sleep afterwards.
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lemonlover1110 · 1 year ago
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𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐬
Satoru Gojo
[Chapter 9] Tantrum
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Pairing: Satoru Gojo x f!Reader
Discord +18 - Twitter - Ko-Fi
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You’ve known Satoru ever since you were five years old, and yet you’ve never realized just how spoiled and entitled he is. Sure, you knew that his parents would buy just about anything he wanted and he never had to face any consequences but you never really notice. Nor did you care. Not until he’s right in front of you, in front of your desk, and he tells you,
“You’re fired.”
It catches you off guard. You’re completely confused, and you don’t gather your thoughts in time. When you’re about to question what he means, he’s locked in his office. You knock on the door, and when there’s no response, you knock much harsher. He ends up opening the door, a brow raised as he asks, “Did you not hear me?”
“You can’t fire me.” You tell him, and he hums as he pretends to think about it. You’re about to call his mother to tell her about the situation, but Satoru slams the door shut which startles you.
“I want you to pack your shit up and leave this building, you’re fired.” Satoru says. You’re opening and closing your mouth, trying to think of what to say. A comprehensible sentence isn’t forming in your head. “You’re not doing your job properly.”
“I’m not doing my job properly? Last time I checked, I was. I’m just not fucking you like you want me to!” You raise your voice and his eyes widen at what you say. He didn’t realize how outspoken you’ve become, but hearing you say that is a reality check for the man.
“How dare you say that?” He responds, making you roll your eyes. You unlock your phone and look for his mother’s contact. Meanwhile you tell him,
“You’re a fucking horrible person. Why are you trying to take my job away from me when I’ve excelled at my job? Because we have a past together? I’m sorry for dating you, I guess.” You finally find the contact and when you’re about to call her, he takes the phone from your hands.
“Are you trying to call her? What business do you have with her? Why is she employing you?” He asks the questions that remain unanswered. You’re also not giving him an answer. He scoffs at your silence before saying, “Reason doesn’t matter. I’m the boss, and you’re fired.”
“You’re an entitled son of a bitch.” You take your phone back. You’re about to call his mother but you pause. You take a deep breath before you say, “You know, I’m glad you left me. If we had gotten married we would’ve gotten divorced within a year.”
“So suddenly you can remember we have a past together.” He says, making you click your tongue against the roof of your mouth. You chuckle, rolling your eyes.
“You were the one who told me to forget about our past while we worked together, why are you mad that I wasn’t bringing it up!” You argue, and he’s gathering his thoughts while you dial his mother. You put the phone on speaker, and he says,
“There’s no way you’re calling her.” And when she picks up the phone, he hears her voice. There’s no way his own mother would side with you of all people. He’s holding back a smirk, waiting for you to say something, to ridicule yourself.
“Hey, Mrs. Gojo. I’m with your son right now and he’s trying to fire me.” You inform her, and you both hear her sigh. Satoru is waiting for it. She’s going to tell you off, she might be putting up a tough act with him but when it comes between you and him, she’ll obviously side with him.
“I’ll talk to him. Don’t pack your stuff up, he’s just throwing a tantrum.” And she hangs up on you. You smile at Satoru, batting your eyelashes before you tell him,
“I’ll let you handle her. Have fun.” Just as you speak his phone rings, and he sees his mother’s name on the screen.
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You’re not sure what you’re expecting that same day when Mrs. Gojo texts you to meet up at a restaurant at lunch. Maybe she wants to talk about Satoru’s awful behavior with you and apologize– You doubt that she’s apologizing, that’s certainly the last thing she’s going to do. You’ve known the woman so long, and you don’t remember her ever apologizing.
You get to the restaurant, and luckily for you, it isn’t something that’s high-end. It’s nice, but nothing extravagant that’ll make you feel bad about how you look. You walk into the place, and tell the hostess the name that the reservation is under, and she leads you to the table. A sigh escaping your lips when you see her and who she’s with. Of course.
“Mrs. Gojo… Gojo.” Your eyes shift from the mother to the son. You know there’s no way you can escape from this, so you might as well sit down comfortably. “What’s the reason for this meeting?”
“I can’t have you two working together while you bicker like children. I need you two to make up.” She says, and you click your tongue. You clear your throat before you tell her,
“Mrs. Gojo, I think it’s best to hurry up with hiring another secretary for your son. As much as I try to ignore it, we have a past together and we simply can’t get along even in a professional manner.” You try your best to be honest with her. You would’ve gladly been demoted back to Shoko’s secretary, but not fired by him. Especially since you know that he did it without his mother knowing.
“I didn’t ask for your opinion, dear. I put you as Satoru’s secretary because that’s what I think fits best.” She responds. Satoru pinches the bridge of his name while your nails dig into the cloth of your skirt. Right, your opinion doesn’t matter. She’s the one that makes all the decisions around here. You stare at Satoru, waiting to see if he’ll actually say something to her.
To no surprise, he bites down his tongue.
She takes a sip from her water before she clears her throat. “I should get going, you two figure it out. I told the waiter to keep his eye on you.”
This reminds you of when you were kids and Satoru would snatch a toy out of your hands which would ensue an argument. You were always forced to make up, of course Mrs. Gojo wouldn’t be the one to force you because at the time she didn’t want her son to be friends with you. It’d always be your mother.
You’re tempted to leave when she leaves, but you stay in your seat. You’re hungry, you might as well order something. He doesn’t seem like he’s going to leave either. When the waiter comes around, you both order something.
You sit in silence, awkwardly looking around the place. After around a minute or so, you take your phone out. You open the couple of messages you have from the nanny, and smile as you see your son. He’s playing with the toy cars that his grandmother got him, and you take this opportunity to glance at Satoru and then at your son. You hate how much they look alike, and as you look back and forth you realize they look more similar than what you had in mind.
“How’s Ren?” He asks, and you nearly drop your phone. You furrow your brows as you take a big gulp from your glass. Can he read your mind? He awkwardly looks around before he asks, “Is that not the name of your cat?”
“Yeah.” You laugh. It takes everything in you not to burst into a fit of laughter. You completely forgot that your son is now a cat. You take a sip of water before saying, “He’s good.”
“Maybe we can make up if you show me a picture of your cat.” He says, and you roll your eyes as you shake your head.
“I decide when we make up, after all, you tried to fire me.” You point out. He really can’t argue with that. You tap your finger against the table before you tell him, “I guess you can talk about what you wanted to talk about so badly. Remember when you asked me to dinner?”
“Yeah… I’ve thought about it and that won’t end well.” He confesses. He can’t get rid of you, he doesn’t know why his mother is insistent on you two working together. “I guess… How have you been doing the past five years?”
“I’ve been…” You take a deep breath. You found out your boyfriend got married months after breaking up with you, you had a baby alone, have been raising him alone, overworking yourself to ensure Ren has the best possible upbringing. You’re tired. You sheepishly smile, “Fine. I’ve been fine.”
“You look tired.” He says. You have no idea why his words make your eyes fill up with tears. You chuckle, standing up to use the bathroom.
“That’s what happens when you work for your mom.” You respond. He doesn’t know what else to say, but it’s fine, you walk away to use the bathroom. He bounces his leg as he waits for you. He has to think of what he’s going to say to kill the awkwardness that goes on at your table
There’s a vibrating sound on the table, and he sees that you’ve left your phone. Satoru gets a great idea, you might not want to share much about your life but you’ve left your phone behind. He doubts your password has changed. He holds back, it’s an invasion of your privacy. But if the phone that’s across the table were to magically land in front of him and light up, it wouldn’t be an invasion of your privacy if he just glanced at it.
He’s fighting back on grabbing the phone and checking everything that you have there. His hand lands on the table and he slowly moves his hand. And just when he’s about to reach the phone, you’re back. You ask, “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah.” He tries to play it off, his hand going to his side of the table and he puts his elbow on the table before his head rests on his hand. You try to act as if you didn’t see him reaching for your phone. You came back when you noticed you had left your phone and you feared this would happen. “So um… Are you seeing anyone?”
“I don’t have the time.” You share. Your food finally gets to the table and you get your utensils to begin stuffing your face. “I was about to ask you the same question.”
“Right.” He awkwardly chuckles. You both begin to eat, and his eyes can’t stop looking at you as you try your best to keep your tableside manners. Satoru can’t eat, his appetite goes away. His stomach growls, wanting food but the thought of eating makes him want to puke. He wipes his mouth with a napkin before he clears his throat. “I apologize for firing you… You are doing a great job and I just–”
“Got in your feelings.” You finish his sentence for him. He ends up sighing. You’re right. You shrug, “As long as you don’t let it happen again.”
“I won’t. I promise. Next time around it’s up to my mom.” He responds.
“So we’re stuck working together forever.” You joke. He ends up laughing. He watches you eat, and you feel awkward since he watches you like a hawk. When you swallow the mouthful of food, you ask him a question that keeps bugging you, “Are you and Sayo thinking of having kids?” 
“Kids! Kids… Um, we haven’t talked about it. Don’t think she wants them.” He answers, and he sounds unsure about it all. You find it odd considering that’s his wife of five years, but it’s none of your business. You know Satoru wants kids but perhaps he’s changed his mind. “So um… You and Suguru.”
“What about us?” You slightly tilt your head to the side. Satoru doesn’t want to bring it up. He doesn’t want to give you ideas, but he already mentioned Suguru.
“You two seem… Friendly.” He asks, and you know what he’s insinuating. 
“I wish… I don’t think he’s into me.” You confess since he hasn’t bothered to contact you ever since he found out about Ren, and Satoru won’t mention the past. He won’t mention it because if he hears that you’ve started dating Suguru, he just might lose his mind.
“How could he not?” He says, and you feel your face get warm.
“Let’s not.” You reply, and he bites his lip. He ends up nodding in agreement. He would have talked to you for hours a couple of years ago, but he doesn’t find a topic to talk about. You don’t know each other anymore.
You keep eating quietly since neither of you want to talk more deeply about the past, and when you’re finished, Satoru calls the waiter to cover the bill. To your surprise, Mrs. Gojo got it covered. You both stand up and exit the restaurant. 
You don’t bother saying anything else as you begin to walk to your car, and you assume that Satoru begins to walk the other way until he calls out your name. You come to a full stop and you turn to look at him. You sweetly smile at him, before you ask him, “What’s up?”
You don’t know what to do when he wraps his arms around you. He hugs you so tightly that he sucks the air out of your body. You’re not sure what to do– Whether you want to hug him back or just awkwardly stand as the man that you’ve loved for so long hugs you. He’s been waiting to do it for five years. 
And he’s waiting for you to hug him back, but you’re not budging. Until you feel a droplet on your shoulder. His head rests on your shoulder and he sniffles. You finally hug him back, “Don’t cry, Toru. You have no reason to cry.”
It’s muffled but you’re sure you hear an,
“I’ve missed you.”
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