#{{ put under a readmore because i feel like this answer is so long.

[acoldsovereign]

Hi, Guillotina! I know you're still in the midst of setting up your blog and all, including new rules for followers (as you've said already), but I hope it's okay for us anons to still send you random IC & OOC asks! If not, you can delete-- I'll understand. ;w; I won't comment on recent dash stuff but I just wanted to check in and see if you/the people involved were okay???? I know you care about Saiyans a lot. Like, a lot, a LOT-- maybe more than anyone I know or seen so far. (In case I sound like a creep, I swear I'm not!) I was here when you first had Google Docs and had a really cute section about relationships/shipping stuff with Bardock. (Was also here when you first set up your Sites page and had an even *cooler* section about the diversity of the Saiyans' gene pool, explaining why Maiz looked so different! Not to mention your cultural & biological headcanons as well but that's neither here or there). So, I just wanted to check in on you. 🥺 I also say this because of your recent Toriyama post (didn't know he said that about female Saiyans omg! Everything makes so much sense now, haha. I was confused for years man 😭 ). Point is, I see how much Saiyans mean to you overall and I think it's rad to see as a fellow female fan of the series! Can you explain more of your muse choice to me? Like, what went into making her? I know you said she came from a fanfiction but I remember on your old blog, you also said she predates it?? Sorry If I'm misremembering! I just think you and your blog are cool! Keep on trucking!

{{ Heyo! Yes, that rule is still in place, anon! I will ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS enjoy receiving random asks (IC or OOC) from mutuals and anons. Though I'm private nowadays, I will extend this courtesy to non-mutuals as well! (How else am I supposed to know we're a potential match as writing partners if I don't extend that olive branch, y'know?). With that said-- awwww, you were here for all for that?! 🥺 My pre-Sites days too and during them?! That means you've kept an eye on me ever since I stepped onto the RP scene here.... You're an OG, you know that right?! I didn't expect this sweet and heartfelt message, so thank you so much for taking the time to write this out. I'm smiling so much like a goofy goober. This means the world to me. But yes, I'm okay. I got two new good friends out of said dash stuff (though we were mutuals already, anyway/had already been interacting). Anyway, yeah, I'm good! They're good, too! Thanks for checking in with us!! I'll tell them you sent good wishes, granted if they don't see this beforehand. :3

About Saiyans meaning a lot to me-- yeah. I wish I could remember the interview it was revealed in, but he was asked about it at some point to where he said something to the effect of "I didn't know how to design them/couldn't figure out their appearance", something like that. It stuck with me because like I've mentioned in my Toriyama post, many toxic (as in sexist/misogynistic fanboys and overall creepy ass people) tried to make DB a thing I wasn't allowed to participate in, all because I was born a girl which was and is-- bullshit. Women aren't a different fuckin' species, man. We like the same shit as men sometimes and that's alright. Trying to put me into a girly girl box is what made me into a rebellious ass tomboy (much like Videl who I somewhat related to, growing up). Only in my late teens/early adult years did I embrace my femininity (yes, I was vain and shallow like Bulma at times. I was also a bit too loose with money when I had some, so I understand her casual attitude regarding her wealth, but that's neither here or there). Point is there was and always have been room for female fans of the series, so when I heard that from the horse's mouth himself? Yeah, it was a wrap. That was it. Nobody could tell me SHIT. That's one thing about me: If I learn something is true and it makes my life easier, I will not listen to anything else. I'll do my own thing. I'm a bit stubborn like that but trust me, it's a good stubborn. Otherwise, I'm very open-minded about many things and I'm a good listener.

As I stated on more than one occasion, I started RPing in a chatroom of an anime-pirating website, while I watched DBZ Kai. After I finished the anime (and lost my original RP group of friends), I coped by scouring the Internet for more RP forums and platforms, of which eventually led me to Facebook. I ran into some mishaps here and there in the DBZ RP space but that aside, the highs were worth it and I stayed for a long while. I mostly specialized in Android/Cyborg OCs and Saiyan OCs. So yes, you are right by saying Maiz (as in RPC!Maiz's template) comes from my 2018 fanfiction but also predates it by SEVERAL YEARS because every female Saiyan I had from the age of 12 and up was essentially a prototype of who Maiz would become. Long story short, Maiz grew with me, even when her names before were: Rayearth (my og username on the chatroom/anime website), Beats, Serori, Celeri, and later Jinjā. Rayearth was able to go Super Saiyan and she was the angry-punchy type. She was closer to Vegeta in temperament and haughty as all hell. Beats was a bit more humble with a hint of cockiness. This was around the time I started playing around with morality and all that, so she was less of a Vegeta type but still rough around the edges. I think I implied she could go Super Saiyan but can't remember if it happened in any threads. Serori was much more humble and quiet-- introspective. However, she could be hostile if approached too quickly or suddenly. She was the first low-class Saiyan I ever made. Celeri was a jump off of that because someone had the same name as my OC so I changed her around*. She was extroverted, but not too much. I guess you could call her a quasi-Goku type, if Goku was Mid-Class and a woman. I changed the rank because I wanted to explore the classism aspect of the Saiyans and my OC's relationship between her and her inherent power. She was morally gray, if I remember correctly.

*A bit petty of me, I'm sure-- but I was immature and a moody teenager who only had her creativity to express herself with. Anything too similar to me back then felt like an attack on my personhood and individuality. Thankfully, I'm a mature adult who's grown past that trauma response from childhood.

Jinjā came in 2015. I was 16 going on 17, about to enter college. Stopped RPing some time before this, because well, I had to focus on school and life stuff. This is what she originally looked like:

She has no story, because she wasn't made with one in mind. I just missed having a female Saiyan to think/write about. She was truly random, a burst of inspiration that heavily looms over Maiz's current design. Jinjā has red, short, choppy hair because Seripa/Fasha was her base design. I wanted something different to make her stand out, or else she'd just look like a clone or twin. That's all. Fasha being the base is also where the earrings comes from, since she had them. (This was just before I started embracing cosmetics and accessories). While she didn't really have anything to her, the basic idea was to go back to my roots: a rough-and-tumble Saiyaness who can pack a mean punch and rock your shit even if it kills her-- even if she fails. Hence my attempt at blood and making her look badass/intimidating. Muscles and female anatomy was hard for me, still is slightly-- but I'm getting the hang of it. Anyhoo, I believe my intentions-- if I fleshed her out more-- would've been for her to be a Bardock-type. Fun fact: Battle of Gods came out a month before this redesign did, so I got some confused looks when asked if this was SSG (Red) and I said no. I wasn't a huge fan of the movie so I didn't really see it until later. Only clips and such on YouTube. I warmed up to it eventually.

While going back to college for the second time (2018-2019), I got into Super properly with the introduction of Broly in DB Super: Broly. I enjoyed the Future Trunks/Goku Black Saga but the narrative nightmare within the anime's climax (and the manga's middle part) was a tough pill for me to swallow. The movie though-- despite the minor grievances I have with it-- hit all the right spots: Saiyan lore! Saiyan culture! POLITICS!!! Space-Opera! Sci-fi!!!!!! Around this time, I was finally inspired to do something else for this fandom I've had a tumultuous relationship with-- write a fan fiction. Jinjā's redesign was imminent:

She got renamed in reference to her mom, who was now Seripa/Fasha's older sister as a nod to the latter being a design base. Karne comes the Japanese spelling of karnels (kaneru, if I have that correct) because she's frustratingly slow to anger like popcorn-- the pun she's based off of. (Fasha in other media, such as the games has always been described as the opposite: short tempered, fierce and feisty. She's staunchly loyal to her crew too, as implied in the movie and in those same games if you pay attention to her dialogue). With this, it only made sense to have the updated version of Jinjā follow the pun as:

To summarize: Maiz became Maiz in 2019, in the wake of DB Super: Broly. (It came out that year in the U.S). In the fanfic she originates from, she is the last female Saiyan, and that weighs on her all the time. Incidentally, Story!Maiz is much more sympathetic while remaining a frosty a--hole. Her trauma is much more apparent and while she's not exactly the nicest person in the Galaxy, it's much more clear to see why: she has attachment issues, which makes getting to know her difficult, she has trust issues, anger issues from surviving a bloody and rather violent/sudden genocide of her people at a young and tender age, she can't remember the last time she slept well, has frequent nightmares of being abandoned by her mother (she was the one who shoved her into an escape pod). She thinks there's no value to her life because she's been traveling through outer space with Turles for six years consecutively and there were several planets/galactic sectors who didn't even know what a Saiyan was. They were lucky to find remains. (Cut tails, boots, bones, dust/ashes, name tags, etc etc. The sights were very, very grisly. And she kept seeing the same things for six. Years. Straight). All of this turned her into a very bitter, negative person who became a straw nihilist. She kind of just wanted to pass away quietly in some corner somewhere, not because she felt remorse for being a Saiyan/the effects of her kin but because she had her entire life upended on a sadistic whim. There was nothing to live for in her eyes. She thought Turles was stupid for having hope after a while and became jaded. While she was stronger than Turles in terms of raw power, she had a issue with not wanting to preserve her ki for important situations. He constantly had to watch over her like a big brother and she absolutely resented him for it (misguided anger, anyone?). It didn't help that he remembered more of Saiyan life than she could. All in all, she was tragic and a bit too edgy probably, but she would grow out of her frosty shell with the introduction of Broly. She reluctantly bonded with him over time on their ship as Saiyan Squad (what I called them out of text) made their way to Earth to settle the score with Vegeta. Paragus didn't do anything for her but make her angry at first-- all this time she's convinced herself there were no more Saiyans and then she sees this old man still kicking somehow? Of course she'd be livid. (Paragus, over his short presence in her life until his death at Vegeta's hands proved to be effective; he became a makeshift father figure and imparted some words of wisdom of which she'd take to heart, post Broly fight. Turles was pretty devastated too and they would finally be the brother-sister duo he's always known they could have been. It's bittersweet and sad, tbh).

Anyway, that's the evolution process. As for why she looks like this in universe-- I'm gonna be honest and say I got it from Father of Goku. There were different looking Saiyans in there, two women have blue hair. Super Saiyan has green eyes and blonde hair. Who's to say there aren't natural green eyed Saiyans who existed? Or blondes? Dark hair can mean black and/or brown, so why not both? Same with dark eyes! Make them brown, hazel, chestnut, almost black or straight up black. Etc etc. (As a reminder, Fasha has purple eyes! PURPLE). If you look at official artworks/some colored manga covers and whatnot, Goku's actually tan. Hell, Future Trunks is basically apricot or a peachy skin tone. If you want a triple whammy??? Read the manga. No, seriously. There are OFFICIAL scans that has Trunks with red hair instead of the Super Saiyan blonde. And those are mistakes from Toriyama himself. Look at Z Broly and all his in between stages-- blue hair, greenish-yellow hair, etc. It's really not that hard to create a unique looking Saiyan, or justify it-- so I feel like the whole dark hair and dark eyes should be overlooked/not a big deal. I also just don't like how restrictive it is from a narrative/in universe standpoint. It's not fun to play with.

Anyway, thank you so much. I know this was long. 😭 My bad. I enjoy talking about Maiz very much and her concepts.

[smallnico]

durge desensitizes to casual positive affection and friendship compilation

also known as real feline durge hours. esper's companions look at them and say Is Anyone Gonna Manhandle That Murderous Twink and then not wait for an answer. contexts/explanations under readmore for the curious

lae'zel and esper do morning exercises and meditation together. most of the time they pass the time in silence, but sometimes they're joined by the local wildlife. esper is a great fan of showing their friends things they might find interesting as a form of affection instead of words, especially with lae'zel, since they have a common discomfort with small talk.

esper doesn't like looking at themself in the mirror, so their makeup is always ancient and haphazardly applied, a fact that distresses the more image-conscientious shadowheart. she and esper have a sibling-like relationship fuelled by mutual amnesia and goth solidarity, among other things, but sometimes a sister has to take it upon herself to fix her stinky sibling's wings.

i already expanded on wyll and esper's dynamic a bit in this piece and i didn't feel like drawing the same thing twice, but suffice it to say, they have absolutely no idea how to talk to each other, but still look out for each other. the joke here is about how i've done a couple of long rests in-game with just alcohol i've found. hey 5 camp supplies is 5 camp supplies

jaheira unearths esper's forgotten mother issues. no real things to add here. no thoughts only cub.

gale said way back in act 1 that esper reminded him of tara, and esper isn't leaning into that on purpose per se, but as i said for lae'zel, they like getting their friends things those friends might enjoy. they also love chaos. show your evocation wizard some love by bringing him extremely destructive spells to play with. show your durge some love by casting chain lightning and letting them watch

i have no justification for this one lmao. esper isn't a Huge fan of being picked up and hefted around like a sack of oats, but maybe they should've thought of that before being small and scoop-uppable. socially, esper and halsin don't click especially well, but esper is fundamentally a creature, and therefore pretty easy for halsin to understand. obviously they don't mind that much :J

esper and karlach voted two most touch-starved nerds in faerun, they help each other cope by sleeping in a cuddle pile like cats. karlach runs warm even after getting her engine tuned up, but esper doesn't mind. she's cozy

astarion is by far the person esper is the most verbal with, probably because he's the only one who really thinks the durgeisms that slip out are funny and #relatable. everyone else errs on the side of caution with esper, but astarion knows he's allowed to take liberties with them, and he does. they have the same sense of humour. these two freaks are completely insufferable together because they're vibing so hard on a level incomprehensible to everyone around them, but astarion can put a stop to esper's self-destructive internal stress engine, and esper can drag him into helping and working hard. the others have no choice but to tolerate them as a couple because no matter how unhinged they are as a unit, they're so much worse for society on the whole as individuals. do not separate them

if you read all this, hope you enjoyed this illumination of esper's party dynamics, i love you <3 enjoy

[dunmeshistash]

Greetings, Mr. Meshi!

This is perhaps a bit of an unorthodox question, but one that has been bothering me for an unreasonable amount of time.

Now, here's the thing: I OBSESS over Marcille outliving everyone she holds dear. It's a theme very close to me, but even beyond that I just find it to be one of the most interesting elements of Dungeon Meshi's story for me personally. I've written an embarrassing amount of lengthy essays on it that will never see the light of day - that's how obsessed I am over this specific element of her character. But, there's something that bothers me...

A lot of poignant stories and artworks that tackle this topic get comments on 'em whenever Falin is the subject of aging, each one some variation of "Everything points to Falin having an extended lifespan after her revival!" which... Seems weird to me?

I don't know why this bothers me so much, but setting aside my personal annoyances, I don't remember anything pointing to this at all. At least, nothing concrete.

I don't know if this is a question you'd want to answer or not, but since your blog is a hub for all sorts of opinions and headcanons, I'd love to know where this line of thought could originate from.

I really wouldn't blame you if you didn't answer this question, though. Part of me feels I'm just asking this because I want to see if others share in my confusion or not.

Rrrregardless, though! Lemme take the opportunity to say that your blog is delighful. Love it! Also, that mushroom man with the funny face that sometimes responds to you with lengthy essays is also really cool. Everyone is cool. At least here on the northern hemisphere! It is smack dab in the middle of fall, after all! Coolness all around! Stay frosty! Or don't! Maybe warm up at a fireplace. I don't know!

Hi there! Thank you for the kind words, I love reading other's opinions on what I post so I also love the additions by the mushroom <3

It's quite hot over here in northeast Brazil, send some coolness my way please I'm dying.

Your question isn't strange at all! And I don't mind answering anything (unless it's rude or sounds like shipping war bait) so don't worry.

(Decided to put the rest under a readmore, TLDR: Kui said "maybe so, right?" about Falin having a longer lifespan but I have arguments why I don't think this actually confirms it. Anyway if you're someone who likes the headcanon you might want to skip this post)

To be honest those type of comments bother me too because I also LOVE Marcille's struggle with mortality and sometimes "Falin will live much longer!" feels undermining of the lesson she had to learn. I don't mind it in the headcanon sphere where everything is allowed and happy endings grow on trees but when it becomes intertwined with canon it starts to make me a little disappointed.

Just a reminder of the lesson she has to learn

She has to come to terms with the cycle of life and death, that something she wants (everyone to live longer) shouldn't be forced upon others just because it causes her grief. So, to me at least, Falin being made into something that will end up outliving other tallmen would undermine the message? In a canon sense ofc, if you're writing a wish fulfillment story then her living longer would have a different meaning, I just wanna be clear I have nothing against it in that sense, it all depends on what story you're trying to tell.

Anyway, actually answering your question that idea comes from the fact she was fused to a Red Dragon, and the fact her body has been affected by it, her sight was fixed and she grows feathers for example, so people theorize maybe her lifespan has been affected too. But we don't really know how long dragon's live so it's hard to say how much it would have been affected if at all.

It also comes from this answer Kui gave in a QnA

Q: Would Falin have an extended lifespan after the whole chimera thing? A: Maybe so, right?

To me this reads as the usual non-answers Kui gives, like, "I'll leave it up to your imagination" but for other people this read as a confirmation of the headcanon, in another questions she answers "I hope so" about Thistle leading a happy life after having his desires eaten and it's even debatable if Thistle survived at all so I don't think those comments indicate much of canon (I'm that way about most QnA answers tbh, unless it's something inconsequential like confirming Mithrun's Brother's name or stuff about very minor characters)

Another argument I have against her having a different lifespan is Izutsumi, Izu has been mixed with a monster but continues to age at the same rate a Tallmen would, even tho she also has different biology because of the Great Cat she's fused with (ears, reflexes, eyes etc etc) she is still a tallman

Falin isn't really the same thing as Izutsumi tho, I understand, but it's the closest example we have, if we believe the AB descriptions and demi-humans are really mixes between humans and monsters that's also another argument about it not affecting lifespan, since all of them are short lived and have an average lifespan of 55.

All of this *can* be dissmissed tho, the other demi-humans and beastmen are all mixed with mammal monsters and nothing nearly as powerful as a Dragon, so there is arguments to be made that Falin is different and that she *might* have an extended lifespan, all I'm saying is that there's no solid confirmation of it, it's fine to believe it but going around "correcting" other people saying it's a fact wouldn't be right I don't think, especially if you're saying that in a conversation about Marcille journey of death acceptance.

Death is a touchy subject and everyone is at different stages of their own journeys with it so I really don't want to judge those who would rather have Falin or even Laios live longer. I'm not really sure how to talk about this in the proper way, but I hope I didn't make anyone upset!

[eowynstwin]

Obviously if your asks aren’t open then feel free to disregard this- (love your work btw I just- I cant- 🥰)

Do you think they keep the dog tags *ON* during sex? How do you think they’d wear them during it? Would they have you wear them?

You don’t HAVE to answer for each individual character obviously if you would rather just do it as a whole or just one that’s fine! Whatever works for you 💕

*cracks knuckles* I’ll do ‘em all. (Sorry for the long post, I’ll put it under a readmore when I get home 🙏)

Do the Tags Stay on in Bed?

Ghost wears his tags because, like the mask, they just don't ever come off. He is two people when he is with you--Ghost is the creature that can protect you, that can do the things Simon Riley would have been too weak for when it comes to your safety. But Simon is the man that could have loved you properly. Simon is the man Ghost believes could make you coffee in the morning, could rub your neck at the end of a long day.

It isn't initially why he wears his tags when he fucks you, but it is now--Ghost holds you in an iron grip, looms over you as he thrusts into you hard enough to bang the headboard against the wall, and feels the tags with a dead man's name clink against his chest. They remind him that you deserve whatever is left of the man who would have been far better for you than Ghost ever could be.

Soap wears his tags fully out of pride. The SAS is his life, is a massive part of his identity, and while he knows not every mission he's sent on is wholly for the good, he holds onto his conviction to act with integrity and compassion no matter what. The SAS might not always do good, but he will, as much as he can.

He wants you to be proud of him, too--he's really doing it all for you, after all. When those tags hang between you as your legs are wrapped around his waist, as they come to rest on your chest when he leans down to kiss you, he wants you to know that when he wears them he's thinking of you.

Gaz has no preference, but more often than not they stay on because he forgets to take them off. Usually, it's because the moment you're both free with enough time to actually have sex, he isn't going to bother with silly things like getting completely undressed--he wants you, now.

So, they've whacked you in the face a couple times as the two of you have gone at it. It's too funny to get mad at, and Gaz always uses it as an excuse to "make it up to you." Sometimes he'll take them off, too, and put them around your neck instead. "Keep 'em safe for me, eh?" he says with a grin.

Price takes his tags off. Over 20 years of service have left him wanting something that exists apart from violence and bloodshed, and every moment he spends with you is that something. He doesn't want to be the Captain with you, not unless he has to be--putting his tags aside gives him permission to just be John with you.

Besides, they'd get in the way. John does his very, very best to please you, to satisfy you beyond any expectation you may have of him, and sometimes that leaves you needing to bite down on his neck to keep from screaming. You’d probably not prefer to break a tooth on the tags’ chain.

Alejandro also takes his tags off, although it’s less about keeping work and pleasure separate and more about the annoyance they can be. When he is with you, Alejo is focused wholly on you, and does not appreciate distractions of any sort. He doesn’t want to have to fling his tags around to get them out of the way, or let them hang to be caught on an errant foot or wrist.

He does, however, love to see you wear them. It’s totally a possessive thing, but in the best way—Alejo worships the ground you walk on, and seeing his name around your neck inspires the same awe usually reserved for the divine. He thinks you could have anyone you wanted, and is humbled daily that you continue to choose him.

Rudy doesn’t care either way if the tags are on or off, and if the topic ever comes up he leaves that up to you. It’s an attitude that is very in-character—Rudy’s satisfaction comes from ensuring that you are satisfied, no matter what. Rudy’s love language, hands down, is acts of service.

Similarly to Alejo, however, he does enjoy seeing you wear his tags. “They belong to you anyway, mi vida,” he’ll tell you, lining your neck with gentle kisses. “All of me does.” (He has been known, however, to forget where he puts them if they do come off. So it’s probably better if they stay on.)

Bonus: Valeria gave hers to you a long time ago. She asks very frequently to see them, to make sure you keep them with you at all times. She promised herself she would never, ever carry their weight again, but she also can’t quite bear to throw them away, so now they stay with the only person in the world that she trusts.

If you wear them to bed, it will inspire a frenzy in her that will leave you limping the next morning. Those tags are a past version of her, a version she emerged from like a snake shedding its skin. While she is never sure how to feel about that previous self, seeing you take care its vestiges satisfies an ache in Valeria that she will never acknowledge.

Bonus: Graves has mixed feelings about his tags overall, being that he is technically not required to wear them anymore. They don’t mean the same thing to him now that they used to. That doesn’t mean they aren’t always on him, of course—he keeps them tucked into his boots. So you never see them.

If you were to ever find them, bring them into the bedroom? It could go one of two ways. On the one hand, you could end up benefitting short-term from the frustrated agitation those tags inspire, with Graves using your body to relieve an old, invisible hurt you never knew about. He will withdraw from you afterwords, though, too caught up in himself to really connect with. On the other, he could just withdraw immediately, recede from you, and the tension of that encounter will linger for days. It’s best not to involve his tags at all.

[jounosparticles]

this feels really odd to ask but but what do you think the hunting dogs' thoughts are about death? specifically if they die and how? cause I feel like all of them share a variation of "I will go down guns blazing and with glory"

fukuchi definitely feels it and I feel like jouno as well. they've both had rough and violent lives so I feel like they've always thought death was just right around the corner.

I don't know about the rest of them though. teruko I feel shares the thought but not as intense as the other two, and I dont know about tecchou and tachihara.

anyway. it's a neat thought to me :3

ohhh i’ve been thinking of the best way to answer this for DAYS. this analysis will be long so ill put it under a readmore.

the hunting dogs and death - analysis

overall, it is shown that they can die. i assume due to their abilities and bodily enhancements that they do not die of injuries very easily. it makes me wonder how disease hits them? partially mechanical bodies may not respond to illness as well as natural bodies would? or maybe the opposite and they can heal more so internally? anyways here's my thoughts on how each hunting dog perceives dying!!

fukuchi

i see fukuchi as fairly self-preserving up until the end. he can't die in battle because he needs to make sure the decay of angels plot carries out.

remember that he was warned of this at nine years old. he had to spend his life preparing for this. he likely grew very wary of living recklessly and became great at fighting very fast and young; i assume that's why he went through dojos to fight as a child.

under no circumstances could he die until the world was safe.

i imagine he put on a selfless face and was willing to take serious harm in order to protect the peace, but i highly doubt he was ever willing to sacrifice his life until his plan worked out.

here we see his thought process and how things need to fall into place. his participation was essential because in no other situation would fukuzawa be the one able to get access to the one order. if fukuchi had died beforehand, the war would play out as the amenogozen warning claimed.

he had to leave the world to fukuzawa, the man he could trust most before facing his own demise.

of course, at this point in the series he has been killed since that was the final goal of his plan. a noble death for a fantastic hero.

jouno

im actually a little conflicted on his perception of death. i believe jouno is willing to sacrifice his life if absolutely necessary but is probably more self-preserving than the others. i believe he likely uses his confident and slightly arrogant attitude to hide this self-preserving mindset. someone who comes off as intimidating or nonchalant during battle is more likely to throw off the enemy whereas appearing nervous or angry will make them seem vulnerable. i believe jouno also sees himself as very strategic and able to get out of situations easily if needed. he's a quick thinker from what we've seen thus far.

lets look at when he confronted fukuchi.

he starts off very confidently accepting the offer. we know this is a facade but him immediately trying to throw fukuchi off guard seems so show he's pretty confident in his next move.

but when this doesn't work, he immediately tries to flee. this is fairly unique for a fight in bsd, many characters will often fight until they either get what they wish or they're too injured to move. despite jouno having an ability that could dodge fukuchi's, he still chose to try and escape instead of continuing to fight. this is a very normal human reaction to have but not one you see as often.

and at a disturbance, he begins to panic and needs to ground himself by reassuring himself instead of fighting back. he's not willing to put his life on the line to stop a global terrorism and his own escape is seen as a victory, which i see as him being more self-preserving. this all took place before the sword was set on fire, so it wasn't as if he had that threat to escape yet.

however, there's a chance he just didn't know how to fight the amenogozen; but his ability was definitely one of the best to fight against fukuchi with.

still, he's smart and made sure to plan adequately in case he was injured in the battle against fukuchi. he wants to keep himself safe, but he's still smart enough to take precaution.

i think jouno has probably been through a lot in his life and wants to spend a while living happily, making him more afraid to die than the others. this is even shown when he took teruko being angry as a threat while fukuchi laughed over it.

(as a small note, fukuchi's line in the anime was "haha. it seems our gremlin is angry today" which makes more sense in this context).

so tldr i think jouno would only go down if absolutely necessary and otherwise is fairly self-prioritizing.

tecchou

i believe tecchou would sacrifice himself if it brings justice.

however, he seems to see himself as one responsible for judgement, so i imagine he gives every single fight his all.

regardless of him acting as judgement, it's been shown that tecchou is willing to die if he fails at his work.

here he promises that if he were to fail he would commit seppuku (killing oneself via slicing through your stomach--an honourable death for a samurai fighter (which lines up with irl tetchou coming from samurai lineage)), which is an incredibly agonizing way to die. regardless, he is fully willing to do it if it is for peace. this shows a confidence in death and commitment to his sense of justice to an extreme manner.

and when he found himself in a situation where he was in the wrong, he immediately admitted defeat and asked his opponent to kill him.

he admits defeat, says his wrongs and is willing to accept the consequences.

he even jumps to the harsh conclusion that he isn't worthy of his title as a hunting dog. the stark white in his eyes show that his mind isn't corrupted and that he is doing what he believes is proper justice. incredibly noble.

luckily he was spared-and likely learned a lot about justice not always being as black and white as things appear.

overall, tecchou is a very noble fighter and is willing to put his life on the line for justice. he doesn't seem to fear death and will embrace it if he feels it is earned or deserved.

tachihara

i have less to say about tachihara than the others. i see him as the type that will go down over what's right and that's shown during his fight with fukuchi.

he isn't willing to fear death or beg for forgiveness. he will go down if it is worthy.

we also see that he keeps a argumentative spirit towards the enemy despite the circumstances. he will put down his opponent even in the moment of death, he just has the confidence to.

this panel also shows that he's more willing to die than to be defeated. he doesn't want to harm anyone and be controlled so he tries to kill himself first.

overall, he's a strong fighter who isn't afraid to sacrifice his life for what he believes in. his orders make him who he is, and if the orders are to win he either will or he will die trying.

(of course that last part doesn't really count when he was posing as a mafioso because he couldn't blow his cover by easily surviving everything).

teruko

much like tachihara, teruko seems to be very willing to put herself on the line to keep people safe. this is shown almost immediately in her introduction.

if ordered, she is willing to die. she's incredibly dedicated to her job and would go down if it saves people.

she's willing to go to drastic measures to keep herself alive as well, destroying her eardrum and continuing to try and fight sigma despite being under the directed resonance guns (which were made to destroy people like her). she didn't run, and she did absolutely everything she could have done in order to win.

she seems to also pride herself in fighting and being hurt in battle, likely to show her resilience and ability to do whatever it takes if it saves people.

she even goes on to call the hunting dogs "society's servants" and refers to the enhancement surgeries as "searing order into their own bodies."

this immense dedication makes me strongly believe that she would have no problem sacrificing herself if it is for the best. she killed fukuchi despite really caring for him, so i can see her being willing to put herself into that situation as well.

tysm for the question!!!!! this was super fun to read through the scenes again and try to piece together a logical guess on them all.

[shaanks]

Hii, i wanted to ask what ur favorite detail of body/ personality about shanks?

oh lord, i. collapsing falling down the stairs that's a hard one to narrow down, I think every inch of him is beautiful and find him endlessly fascinating BUT I also yammering about him so okay lets try. Putting this under a readmore bc it got long LOL

Favorite part(s) of his body: Probably his scruffy jawline, his chest/tummy/and his hand(s). Just like.

like. do u see what I am saying.

like that divot between his wrist and thumb also I--honorable mention since it's so intrinsic to him people address him using this but also his hair is SO PRETTY. The color, the texture, the way he lays around the nape of his neck.

Anon I'm sorry I think that man is so gorgeous idk how to narrow it down to just one trait lmfaoooo

Okay though moving on!

Favorite personality trait:

This one's getting a couple of things too lmfao.

I really enjoy it about him that he's both funny goofy silly as like. a genuine core pillar of his personality, and also as a conscious choice that he makes so a) the people he cares for feel comfortable around him and b) he can pay attention to situations from a lot closer than he could if he was being A Big Scary Emperor all the time. (plus the bonus reasoning that he knows how powerful he is and how different from other people he is, and has put a lot of effort into being really difficult to provoke because of this).

I love that he's a little shy!!! Like, we've only seen it in small, select situations, but the way he gets kind bashful and giggly when people are gushing about him or being super sweet to him is so lovely and endearing, it feels like such a personal little reaction he has and it makes me wanna wrap him up in my arms every time I think about it.

His propensity for kindness and compassion, and how those things and loyalty to his friends are the most likely emotions to drive him to action. Don't get me wrong, he can absolutely revoke those things if sufficiently provoked, but like. Him talking about how it's okay to cry, how he takes care of the funeral arrangements for Ace and Whitebeard bc despite the fact that the WBP were technically his rivals/"enemies", they're pirates, and people he knows, and they were all in such dire grief that he stepped in to take all that off their plates. The way he entreated Whitebeard to call Ace off the hunt so he wouldn't be killed, the way he stepped in not only to save Koby, but to highlight his bravery and legitimize his need for rest. There is a LAUNDRY list of stuff he does like this, hell the way he interacted with Luffy as a child could be its own long ass post lmfao.

This got so out of hand LMFAO I hope these kinda answered your questions though!!! Thank you so much again for asking, I love and jump on any chance to talk about him. ; u ;

[marclef]

What inspired you to make Eyhm?

..... y'know since i don't have to spend several hours putting more effort than necessary into drawing a Cat for this i might as well answer it already lmao 😅

but, well, i KINDA have gone into it before, long story short she's an OC i've had for a long time that i really like putting into other media i like, just for the fun of it really! plus i'm just a really big cat person so, of course i'm going to make an OC based off of my favorite animal 🤗but Pizza Tower's kinda the first time i feel like i've really made her fit into the universe she's in, so much so that i've basically shoved the non-AU version of her off to the waywide, and now the Pizza version of her IS her, more or less! plus i'm just really proud of the design i made for her, i feel like there's a lot more personality than the simple design i had for her in the past.

there's been a lot of changes and other stuff i've made for her over time as well, of course, i'll share a couple silly things here just because i feel like it. (putting under a readmore because, eh, i don't feel like bothering people who couldn't care less heh 💧)

well, i do have what i think is the second(???) time i ever tried drawing Eyhm in Pizza Tower's art style, you can tell the original design i had for her was a lot different though 😅 (also behold one of my first times drawing Peppino, i still didn't know how the heck i wanted to draw this Italian Man yet)

(... and yeah, some old backstory stuff i had for her that's a lot different than it is now, mostly the fact that she KNOWS that she used to be human more than anything. but i won't get into all that here 👍)

speaking of backstory stuff, fun fact. i was inspired to change up the lore and backstory ideas i had for her a while back, partially because i didn't like it, and also in part because i had a weird-ass dream with her in it. i barely remember much about it, besides one very important detail: it had Pizzahead running Eyhm over in a car.

no, i don't know why this is important. but i did make an edit of it. here you go.

is this important to her backstory at all? no. but for some reason it inspired me to change her. thank you Pizzahead Hitting a Small Cat with a Car Dream.

..... okay maybe i got a little off track here. but that's the price you pay for asking me about my Funny Little Guys 👍👍 anyways, back to trying to draw other people's Little Guys for the rest of the month, so long 👋

[aq2003]

because nobody asked here is some deranged rambling/commentary about bbc3 audio drama twelfth night bc i listened to it again to jot down the timestamps and i am annoying (sorry). this is sort of long so i have hidden it under the readmore

going off the point i made in the previous post about rearranging 1.1 to be after 1.2 but the delicious foreshadowing in "will you go hunt, my lord?" "what, cesario?" "the hart" that occurs when it's viola/cesario talking to orsino rather than curio

also by rearranging 1.1 and 1.2 this means the audience is first told that both olivia's father and brother are dead, and then we see valentine reporting on olivia shutting herself in just to grieve her brother. almost like everything orsino knows about olivia is secondhand, incomplete information from his messengers

viola forgetting to make her voice deeper when talking to orsino for a second before catching herself is such a great detail. i like how you still get the sense of "disguise" without any visuals to accompany it

her voice gets a little higher when orsino is up close to her anyway

funeral bells ringing when we first meet olivia. she lost her family!! leave her alone guys!!

this may just be me but i feel like olivia's and malvolio's voices complement each other soooo well. they both have this "serious mature grounded" vibe when they're introduced + they're talking to feste. and of course this is true to the text cuz of olivia's line in 3.4 "he is sad and civil and suits well for a servant with my fortunes"

this also means that olivia and malvolio feel like a more proper match for each other. they sound like they're about the same age, their personalities gel w one another. it makes malvolio genuinely thinking that the letter is real + he has a chance w/ her a lot more believable (and sad)

"what kind o’ man is he?" "...why..... of mankind?" "what manner of man?" just trust me on this one when i say the way this is played makes me truth for autistic malvolio. malvolio being confused by what she's asking but trying to give her an answer anyway, and olivia emphasizing the clarification like this kind of miscommunication has happened a bunch of times

viola and olivia in 1.5 have chemistryyyyy. viola/cesario is putting on The Moves for her, and i think is EXACTLY how this scene should always be played. pulling open the curtains and opening the window!!! lifting olivia's veil!!! letting in the light!!! (what a metaphor). making her laugh by poking fun at toby and malvolio!!! swooping into her life and leaving her breathless w their sheer audacity!!!!!

basically, shoutout to naomi frederick who so clearly plays viola as being Very Into Olivia Herself rather than just being a mouthpiece for orsino and doing it for him. i can REALLY believe why olivia falls for her

the fact that "malvolio has to outrun viola on horseback" is explicitly not how 2.2 is staged in the text it's just they want to emphasize that this version of malvolio is so committed to doing anything for olivia no matter what

"you might have saved me my pains to have taken [the ring] away yourself" is now SO much more funny lmao

the fact malvolio gives viola the ring, viola throws it back, and THEN malvolio throws it down on the ground (as opposed to him just throwing it down on the ground like in the text) pleaseeeeee he doesn't get paid enough for this

the satisfied way viola says "i am the man" like she takes pride in the fact that she won olivia over and her only regret about it is "but we're both girls.... :(" mx bisexual disaster.......

i did make a bunch of "what the hell is wrong with you maria lol" posts but i will say that her actions do make more sense with how she's played here in 2.3 ie when she comes up to tell them that olivia/malvolio wants them to quiet down she's laughing and joining in with their singing anyway bc they're having such a good time (rather than like. she and malvolio are both fed up with them but malvolio is meaner about it and this suddenly makes her decide to plot his downfall)

it makes that bit where malvolio is like "maria if you care about olivia at all you will stop fucking tolerating this nonsense" hit that much harder bc he's extending his threat to toby towards her too. i don't think he's just making it up, i think he's putting his foot down for olivia bc she doesn't have the heart to do it herself but Lmao he really IS the kid that reminds the teacher that there's homework due today

viola suddenly stopping the music as she stares straight at orsino and goes "of your complexion". i can Hear the look in her eyes as she says this.

like godddd i love this viola so much

orsino going on his whole tirade about how women don't have the same capacity for love as men do, to viola's face, while the ocean roars in the background?? saying "[my love] is all as hungry as the sea?" OUCH.

because when viola says "i know too well what love women to men may owe", she isn't just talking about her love for orsino. she's also talking about her grief over her brother

and this makes SUCHHH a great segway into viola/cesario talking about their "sister". she's still grieving sebastian!! the memory of him is haunting her and she's tried to push it down but the (indirect) accusation that she had nothing in her heart for him is bringing it all back

AND THIS IS WHY THEY MOVED 2.1 TO RIGHT AFTER THIS... TO SHOW BOTH VIOLA AND SEBASTIAN GRIEVING THE OTHER BACK TO BACK... AUGHHHH IT'S SO PERFECT

i have yelled about malvolio in 2.5 in the tags here already but my god. can someone please help him

"'tis but fortune, all is fortune" he says after immediately tripping and falling on his face. it suddenly makes the line sarcastic and malvolio is dwelling on his general unluckiness lmao. and then he says that part about olivia potentially being in love with him to make himself feel better

"revolve... revolve? no." He exists in an audio-only format and he cannot do a little spin. this is so sad

the fact you can HEAR the happy tears streaming down his face by the end esp from the breathless way he says "i thank my stars, i am happy!!!!" truly hilarious and embarrassing and heartbreaking all at once!!! i am being killed to death listening to this!!!!!

"a ring in chase of you... so did I abuse myself, my servant, and, i fear me, you" olivia girl whatever you're paying malvolio it isn't enough

THE WAY THEY PLAY THE WHOLE "THEN THINK YOU RIGHT I AM NOT WHAT I AM" AS VIOLA ASSUMING THAT OLIVIA KNOWS SHE'S A GIRL AND EXPECTING A CONFRONTATION BUT INSTEAD SHE CONFESSES HER LOVE IS SOOOO LMAOOOOOOOOOOO

viola vs her internalized homophobia coming off as cesario going "sorry olivia i am gay" kills me every time. this isn't a commentary on the adaptation i think this is probably one of the funniest moments in the play just in general

3.4 makes me want to hit my head against a wall btw get them both out of there

the sound effect after malvolio says "yellow in my legs" makes me think he pulled up a chair and put a leg up on it. which would be super funny if i wasn't trying to not listen to what's happening rn

the "sweet roman hand" was originally malvolio talking about olivia's handwriting but here he says it after she slaps him djhgwjhgjwfbwmfw

malvolio struggling to pronounce the word "slough" has made ME forget how the word is supposed to actually be pronounced, btw

"souls and bodies hath he divorced three" "THREE??" "three!"

THE FUCKING FENCING SOUND EFFECTS KILL ME SO MUCH 😭😭😭😭😭

the only real complaint i have w this adaptation is that antonio is not nearly as down bad for sebastian as he should be. they even cut out his "beauteous evil" lines. this is so sad

andrew: i should fight cesario [gets beat up] damn cesario got hands

why did they do that to malvolio man

my heart cracked in two at the first "sir topas?" and genuinely every line delivery david did after that made me want to cry. i have a problem

they had to cut out feste and malvolio arguing about pythagoras because this malvolio is nowhere There enough to do anything but scream and beg for help like he keeps repeating it's so dark and i'm in hell and i'm not crazy and please give me candle pen ink and paper bc He's Been There Long Enough That He's Losing His Perception Of Reality And Feste's Gaslighting Is Not Helping

really like how malvolio and sebastian are contrasted by splitting 4.2 into two parts. something something class difference

sebastian is thinking to himself "what the fuck is happening, am i actually just insane" and then there's an immediate cut to the second part of 4.2 where we know malvolio is feeling the same way. But like. in an "exact opposite nightmare situation" kind of way

sorry the way malvolio says "ay, good fool". i need david to pay for my god damn emotional damages

we now cut from this horror scene to sebastian getting it on with this woman that he just met

the genuine pity in olivia's voice when talking to malvolio…….which obviously does not make the situation better for him in any way…………

sorry it is so fucking crazy to me that malvolio made the (true!) observation that feste can't do anything unless people laugh at him and give him money and feste takes it SO personally that he decides to psychologically torture him

potentially a weakness of the adaptation in itself for doing all this but i was not lying when i said that at the end of listening to it i couldn't feel anything except for abject despair at what happened to malvolio. none of this is funny!!!! oh my fucking god!!!!!

However what i did gain from this is that malvolio is my bleebo blorbo and i have several more emotions about him

anyway

[adyophene]

Hello ! I just have a little question, how do we start drawing ? I want go draw but idk how to start- any suggestion ? Or, if for starting it's better to do it with tutos, any tutorial to recommend ?

Have a great day !

Oooh, this is a tough question to answer! I suppose one the best pieces of advice I have is to figure out, before anything, what you are hoping to draw. What style, what tones, what media.

I have a feeling this might get long, so I will throw the rest under a readmore.

For me, when I started taking my art a little more seriously (I never went to art school or anything) I just focused on finding both tutorials on the fundamentals, and finding tutorials that focused on the aspects of art that interested me, which were animation and cartooning!

They go hand-in-hand, after all, and you'll find you end up honing in on the tutorials that coincide with your interests! IE- I ended up doing a lot of figure, and expression drawing because they would help me express emotion and movement better! I also spent so, so long just training my hand to be a bit more confident with drawing steady lines just because I loved the look of clean line-work!

So try to identify what your personal draw towards art is! By doing both something you like, as well as focusing the basics, I found that, at least in my personal experience, it put me in a positive feedback loop where I could keep seeing results in exactly the type of art I was interested in! And, once you start to feel confident, that is when you start adding in little bits of study from fields you might struggle with! A 90/10 split on what you're comfortable with and then what is new is usually a good way to go about it! Weirdly enough, though I don't watch him, I saw that the youtuber pewdiepie actually had a really good set of videos where he started from being a complete beginner and improving his art over 100 days. I believe its an absolutely great watch for a new artist, because he really does a great job in showing what a brand new journey into art can look like, and explains what he thinks each day. I think my favorite line was, 'after 24 days, I was finally having fun' because that can really sum up the new artist experience. It will absolutely be a slog at times, and can be really disheartening, but when you start to see progress, becomes so, SO fun.

Here is the link to the first vid, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMLEudGbxQk and his second https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MJDtQTTAogk

ALSO- this was just the first video that came to mind because I watched it recently. I would recommend finding other videos about people learning to draw, or doing 30-100-365 day challenge videos. As for my personal favorite channels for art tutorials (though keep in mind, I haven't watched them in a few years ;-;, I need to study again);

There were a number of others that I wish I could link as well, but I am struggling to remember them. I hope any of that is helpful. My own art journey has been very long, and non linear, and I have to say, I'm not even satisfied with my own art! Its a endless mountain to climb, but it is so worth it to do! And lastly, I want to say thank you so much for sending this ask, you've made me dig back in to artists I used to study, and made me want to really focus back in on my own improvement!

[huntershowl-moving]

SHIPPING INFO // ANSWER THE FOLLOWING FOR YOUR MUSES SO PEOPLE KNOW HOW SHIPPING WORKS ON YOUR BLOG.

WHAT IS YOUR OTP FOR YOUR CHARACTER(S)?

i don't have one particular otp — big ships change depending on the Era hellhound is in!

HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE?

nothing illegal obviously — other than that, aside from long-lifespan characters whose mental maturation is slower, i generally stay away from with 10+ year age gaps when the younger muse is under 20. just feels like a weird power dynamic i guess?

ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING?

yes! ships on this blog cannot be pre-established — i tend to lose interest fast if they don't build up naturally, either through lots of ooc plotting or through writing. on top of that, seph is ... piiiiicky. she has very specific Types. generally, ships with very gentle, soft, mentally well-adjusted characters are possible, but transient — seph falls out of love after a point, but remains staunchly protective of them.

the long and short of the matter is she's a freak, and you kind of have to match that to be compatible as a long-term partner. but even then they don't always line up perfectly! idk. seph's weird. simultaneously very easy to ship with and very hard to ship with.

WHO ARE OTHER CHARACTERS YOU SHIP YOUR CHARACTER WITH?

oh i've got lots of good ones going on right now!! pls forgive me for gushing. focusing on currently heavily-plotted and/or written ones for this bit bc otherwise it will be pages and pages!! if i forgot someone you have full permission to impale me on a pike i am SO SORRY. (all of these will be under a readmore at the end of the post for length!)

there are more sort of beginnings/potentials for ships that haven't been explored yet which i haven't included here, but i'm truly excited to see where each and every one of them goes!!!

DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU?

yes absolutely hahaha — at least communicating ooc about it is necessary! i'm much more comfortable shipping with partners i mesh well with as a mun and have an easy time talking to.

ARE YOU SHIP-OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS?

LOOK I. LISTEN. LISTEN... IM FERAL FOR SHIPS. FERAL. even though seph is picky about them — and i promise it's not personal if it doesnt work, it truly is just her dumb creature ass being unable to normal.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SHIP IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM?

N/A for this blog, but as a fun trivia fact, i'm deep in satosugu hell rn

FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU?

it's all vibes babey. we just start writing their non-romantic dynamic buildup, and if it clicks (or even if u just think ur character would have a crush!) we talk about it ooc and plot some more, then plot some more and before u know it, the angst hammer looms over ur head

Tagged by: @bearratic (thank youuuu!!) Tagging: (points) do it

ship gushing below. <3

@vsagis' villain izuku— i had to put u first bc u kickstarted this shipping renaissance. seph and izuku clicked instantly and started a long-term trajectory that i don't think either of us writers expected. they're just freak enough to match each other, just soft enough to genuinely care. we're really putting these two through the horrors(tm) and watching them fall hopelessly, horribly in love. <3

@spiritcrown's pasha — how could i not mention pasha!! i was so happy to see you back, because pasha and seph's relationship was soooo formative for seph's development wrt romance. seph is absolutely, completely and utterly devoted to pasha. they worship at the altar of her. they would bend heaven and raise hell for her.

@crowshoots' jesper — UAHGHGBBHBH INCOHERENT CRYING NOISES. the first thing seph noticed about jesper was extremely respectable fighting skills, but even then they were definitely uhhhh touch and go for a while there before they started to simmer down and. pin each other down and — one thing led to another and jesper's being antagonized by her antagonists and they're too deeply in love to go back!! i love them. i l

@crowgreeds' kaz — HHHHHHHHH god. hi siri i know ur not around the dash much but idc im writing u into this. kaz and seph both have such a darkness in them that the other recognizes and not only feeds, but when necessary, balances. they're ruthless and violent and mean but at the same time, they have such a softness for each other that they both thought was dead. also, you're the recipient of probably the best rp reply i've ever written (that fucking. hellhound kill description. my GOD im feral for seph protecting him)

@tewwor.... goose is2g we really have the creatures ever. litho — FIRST SHIP!!!! FIRST SHIIIP i still cant believe it took 4 irl years for them to finally admit their stupid feelings. now they're soulmates and there's no turning back. he's the reason seph likes poetry in every verse. the softest snarkiest ship. probably the closest to a true YA-style soulmate seph has. she hasn't forgiven him for all the twilight jokes though tough luck jie & ricochet — the boys... the absolute chaos trio... i never expected seph and jie to fall for each other but honestly i should have. he falls so neatly into her "equally feral" type. ricochet is so calm and seph is kind of intoxicated by that. sheathed claws kind of vibe. just love these three their dynamic balances itself so well

@spungolden's dio — two femmes raised as weapons with deeply suppressed emotions, chillin in a murder alley, five feet apart cause theyre not g— (theyre gay. theyre so gay) these two are so sweet they sometimes make me tear up. they skipped the trauma stage and went straight into lesbian domestic fantasy with only occasional murder.

@chaoslulled oh boy(s). toji — brutally in love. they saw and embraced each other's monster, refused to shy away, and now they somehow revolve in this strange orbit of violent and incredibly soft with each other. i think he's the first of the current ship lineup that seph has in-thread said the L-word to. this ship was so easy to jump right into, the chemistry was like lightning in a bottle. satoru — one of the most genuinely unexpected slowburn ships i've stumbled into. these two read each other for filth INSTANTLY as lonely motherfuckers who, in some way or another, had loved and lost. they haven't even gotten to the oh-shit moment in the slowburn yet but i'm lookin forward to it yakuza sukuna — THE PAIN. THE SUFFERING. AUHHHGHGGGG HOL YOU'RE FUCKING KILLING MEEEE. these two are mirrors in the worst possible way. they've got their throats stuck under their boss' boot heels; they've been disfigured, they've had their siblings used as leverage, they've been made into muzzled dogs. despite hating each other at the start, they can't not recognize that, and it's led to this fierce protectiveness that isssss whoops evolving into feelings. i'm sure nothing will go wrong

@eraserisms' shota — AHHHHHHH god okay most of this ship has been pure plotting vibes and responses to memes, but i truly cannot wait to get into writing more of them because they own my heart and soul. i think they know each other to the marrow in a way that's not super common for seph, and the gentleness and caution with which they're starting to explore revisiting their care for each other is heartbreaking in the best way

@sasouken BEE!!!! ok chronologically(??): deku — so precious and wholesome from the start. your honor he's just a little guy with a big dumb crush. when i tell uuuuuu some of our plotting has literally made me tear up a little??? the absolute bleeding heart on this boy??? HURTS ME??? one day they'll hold hands casper — slated to be our angstiest dynamic, i just Know it. two motherfuckers who love their siblings, inextricably involved in a tangled web of crime and violence. two people who have lost so much and don't want to lose anyone ever again. i will die i WILL satoru — such... a different vibe than i was expecting in an amazing way?? his dynamic with seph is so fuckin sweet? so much physical touch born of trust and comfort. also again: her first ever fwb (for now), which is truly a wild thing to experience. sukuna — i .. . dont even know what to say about this one. (affectionate). he unlocked an entirely new dimension of freak in seph's psyche and attraction style that i couldn't comprehend before we started writing them but retrospectively makes so much sense. what the fuck is going on with these two i have no idea but i am OBSESSED with it. also writing them getting down nasty has been extremely fun, i'm enjoying it a lot

[wavebiders]

what do you think about campaign 2? is there anything it does better than campaign 3, and vice versa is there anything campaign 3 does better than it?

Interesting question! Gonna put the answer under a readmore since it'll probably get long and also bc my feelings on cr2 aren't all that positive so superfans of that campaign have a heads up to keep scrolling

So, I'm just gonna be completely honest up front and say I never finished cr2 so my judgement is gonna be very flawed. At the time I was younger and very caught up with the toxic positivity aspect of this fandom, so I stamped down basically every issue I had until it all spilled over and I was left feeling so negative about it I had to go complete cr cold turkey until tlovm aired.

I know that's oversharing, but I just don't feel right commenting on cr2 without being upfront about how my personal feelings on it come from a weird place. I try to be more objective about it these days, but I'm afraid I'm not entirely objective.

Anyway cr2 and cr3 are really two entirely different kinds of stories. The former I consider to be most like an open-world video game, while the latter is more like an ongoing comic book. It's hard to tell which one does things better because they're not really doing the same thing at all

In terms of pacing they both struggle in opposite directions. Cr3 has had too much going on for a long time with very little breathing room while cr2 was 90% filler. We haven't had balanced pacing since cr1 so for these two it's more about what you personally prefer. For me the difference would be determined by my connection to the characters.

Which brings me to the characters. This is of course the most subjective thing of them all. I'm not going to pretend I don't prefer the Bells Hells by a mile, but there is also a reason the Mighty Nein are so popular on social media. It's the party of NPC's vs the Be Gay Do Crimes party. The latter may has well have been built in a lab for tumblr queers. Hell it's what drew me to the show in the first place.

I think cr2 was more experimental for most cast members, with them really going outside their comfort zone(Travis playing a more serious character, Liam going more morally questionable, Travis and Ashley dipping into romance) and the results really resonated with a lot of people. Personally I struggled with most of the party for a few reasons. What they were trying didn't suit me, Ashley being gone for most of the early days, a party member dying before they could really get started, etc.

With cr3, I think it's clear they took the lessons they learned from the past 2 campaigns and really played into their strenghts while still exploring new ground. The fact that the players have lived in Exandria for so long now also allows them to craft backstories more tailored to the world around them which gives them a very unique feel. I also personally just find myself resonating more with the themes they chose to explore.

Honestly I could do a whole breakdown of each character and which ones I think work best for their campaigns but this is getting long enough so I won't.

Cr2 did spend more time digging into characters backstories but for me that had the massive downside of the gap between which characters got focus being incredibly blatant. I know people like to complain about main character Imogen, but that's nothing compared to how badly cr2 sucked at balancing narrative focus amongst the party.

That's not say I'm not bothered by cr3 not taking more time to explore things specific to the pc's backstories, but with the way most of them are tied to the main plot it still works. I do think it does a much better job at balancing focus, even if Imogen obviously has the strongest plot connection.

And finally, I think cr2 is best at being a more typical found family fantasy experience(cr1 is too but a very different flavor) in that you have a bunch of assholes slowly learning how to trust each other and help each other face their demons. The bond between the Hells is just as believable and more compelling to me personally, but it is not gonna scratch the itch a lot of people are looking to scratch with an actual play show.

What cr3 excells at is deconstructing tropes, posing ethical dillemas, really making you think about the world the story takes place in and considering different point of views. This is why so many long-term fans struggle with it so much. It's also why I think, especially if all 3 campaigns get adapted, cr3 will be the most memorable one with the biggest impact.

[chaseprice]

hi!! hope i’m not a bother. i just came across u and i wanted to ask something,,,

basically, i joined the life is strange fandom in 2018 so i never got to experience the pre-bts era, meaning i didn’t get to experience what rachel was like to the fandom back then or see the different interpretations of her.

i did some digging and i found some fan content of her from 2015-2016 & i’m absolutely infatuated with all aspects of the fanon version of her, especially her personality & how she looked. i totally wanna embody her. also the love is strange vn was so interesting to play, i love how she was written. i’d love to know more!

i stumbled across ur blog while i was doing my digging and i saw an old long post of urs saying how bts didn’t live up to the fandoms expectations, as almost everyone perceived her differently.

sorry for all the yapping LOL but what i basically wanna ask is,,, how *exactly* did the fandom perceive rachel back then (2015-2016). what were some popular headcanons for her? things you guys even considered to be canon? what were some of your own *personal* headcanons? (can be silly, realistic,,, just anything you thought resonated with her)

do you have any favorite arts from that time period that you thought really captured her? what were your hopes for the prequel/rachels character before it was released? what did you want to see in terms of story? was rachel’s style, appearance, & personality extremely different than what you expected? what did you expect?

i assume that rachels treatment in the fandom was different then than what it is now. whether it’s better or worse, i’m not sure. i was hoping u could answer that too😞. recently i’ve just been seeing constant hatred or lack of care for her character so i’m starting to think that if bts was written differently and based on the fandom’s interpretations instead, the hate now wouldn’t be this bad.

from my digging it seems like you guys had alot of fun sculpting rachel’s character on your own, and the interpretations were probably more realistic than what decknine put together.

anyway i’m sorry for the yapping essay on this random saturday, most old lis accounts are dead & i didn’t know who else to ask☹️. just trying to relive what you guys experienced the best i can. hope i’m not bombarding you with this. thank you so much if u respond !!

hiii u def did not bother me, i am not in a position to answer all of these questions, but although it makes me feel ancient, it's cute to see so much passion for rachel and pre-BTS fandom opinion, so i'll try answer some and for the rest (art, hcs, etc.) im just gonna have to direct you to my archive* (will continue under the readmore)

*(tumblr archive is so broken on mobile so you gotta go on pc for this, but also there's so many gifs from that time so it will Definitely slow down your browser). i was insane and 17 years old so like, just excuse all of the cringe content i guess. you can click tag and filter it by either #lis #rachel amber #amberprice or whatever to try and find stuff like art. and i got into lis sept 2015 so that's like, as far back as it will go, but i was fully lisbrained from 2016 through 2018)

to be honest, in alignment with pre-bts thought lmao, rachel is whoever you want her to be. there was less of 'this is a correct objective fact about her personality/history' and more 'yeah, this is an idea the fandom really likes and has become fanon, most likely because it is a nuanced and entertaining and realistic interpretation of what we have seen of her character in lis1' which means people whose opinions conflicted with that might've be contested/laughed at/unpopular, but they weren't wrong per se. there were plenty of people i'd criticise (and ridicule) back then for implying that this teenage girl was evil, and being a teenager myself back then, i'd call them morally reprehensible and cancellable and whatever, but tbh, as an adult now, i can just see that it was simply a boring interpretation of her character informed by misogyny

i'd disagree with the notion that fandom treatment of rachel's character was better before bts, back then there were plenty of people seemingly excited to characterise her as emotionally manipulative, a cheater, deserved what she got, etc. as well, bc tbh, the story did leave room for that interpretation, but it left room for so much more as well. i feel like bts just really locked in on a certain story they wanted to tell plot-wise, and didn't choose to explore a lot of the questions fans had about rachel as a person. it's hard to turn the ambiguity of a friendship turned situationship over a period of 4 years into a playable experience for an audience - so they didn't. regardless, it got people thinking about rachel more, putting a spotlight on her, hence increased attention both positive and negative. i feel like there's just a fundamental difference between what lis1 fans enjoyed about the potential for her character and how she related with chloe and the world around her, and what deck9 wanted to portray in bts (yes they hit the astrological headcanons, the charmingness, her rebellion, the emotional conflicts... but it personally felt hollow, contrived sometimes, i suppose). but there were a lot of people who loved bts (i enjoyed a lot of parts of it!). just, in my opinion, some of those were quite different people from who loved lis1, and with that wave it brought a lot of emotional immaturity to the fandom (like... ship wars, really? that was an insane change to fandom dynamics for me lmao, but maybe i was just spoiled by surrounding myself with people whose takes i respected)

anyway i highly recommend also that if you're hungry for that kind of content, read fanfiction on AO3 by the old fans - by Mogatrat (TON of rachel centric ones there), explosionshark and tippytypewriter, chicknparm (though Cusp is written post-bts, it's informed by pre-bts characterisations), vicepoint (me hehe), def many more good ones out there those r jus my friends so they come to mind first, e.g. i liked homecoming by kriegersan back in the day, but you could def find some more by sorting the lis ao3 page by kudos and reading the older ones that are highly rated featuring rachel. and lastly, my gf wrote a beautifully worded blog post called "The Assassination of Rachel Amber by the Cowards Dontnod and Deck Nine" which gets into some of this from a media crit perspective (not about fandom) in a very eloquent way thru comparison w twin peaks and i highly recommend that

rachel hcs that def started way before bts: skater rachel, stoner rachel, punk music listener rachel (but also like, fleetwood mac cranberries cocteau twins grungy hippy stuff rachel too), rachel's parents being distant and still living in california, curvy thick rachel, things that i've accepted as canon but were def created by diff people: bri explosionshark hc'd that rachel paid for chloe's sleeve, mogatrat (i think) hc'd that rachel initially went to get her nips pierced with chloe (that's a longtime fan hc now idk who started that one) but chickened out at the last minute, i think she also hc'd that chloe made the earring for rachel which is cute too

[milimeters-morales]

chapter 2 of my transfem miles fic under the readmore, and our fav spidey's undiagnosed anxiety disorder is more prevalent here too

Chapter One / Chapter Three / Chapter Four / Chapter 5 / Chap 6 / Chap 7 / Chap 8 / Chap 9

Wordcount: 4k+

Warnings: Piercing ears, but nothing graphic, just Miles being sensitive to the pain.

Gwen places a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, take a deep breath, it’ll be over before you know it,” she tells him in a calm and soft voice. “The worst part will be the itching. That’s it.”

“But what if-”

“Whatever your brain is telling you will happen is 100 times worse than what could happen. Lay it on me, lighting round style,” she moves to grab the needle and sits next to him on her bed, “and then we’ll do a countdown.”

“What if my earlobe rips?” He asks.

“That won’t happen, the earring isn’t strong enough, and your body is extra durable from our powers.” She answers easily, turning the earring in her fingers.

“What if I toss in my sleep, and pierce my face or neck? What if the holes close up from that too?” His fingers start to stick to his jeans, and he tightens his fist against the material. The scratch makes him focus on his leg rather than Gwen cleaning the needle.

Gwen frowns and nudges his leg with her foot a bit roughly. “Well, that won’t happen as long as you keep the backs on, and if that ever did, you’d feel it enough to wake up and handle it. It’ll heal up nice and easy, and you could take medicine for the pain if you get a headache. If the earrings come out completely, and the holes close, we can just do this again.”

Miles tries to get his thoughts in order to ask his final question. He turns to her and meets her eyes. “It’s… it won’t be stupid-looking, right?”

Gwen smiles, the warmth flooding her features and the colors of her room, and says, “Miles, you are literally one of the only people who I can say, with my whole heart: you could rock any piercing. We’re going to be using some different earrings that I know how to clean though, these look really expensive and I can’t really tell what they're made of.”

She finishes cleaning her needle and grabs the earrings she intends to use. “Ready? Three,”

“ SSS —” Miles sucks in a breath through his teeth as a sharp stinging pain hits him, “hhuhh…”

“Does it still hurt?” Gwen asks.

“About an eight out of ten… I thought you said you were doing a countdown.” He grumbles, roughly gripping his wrist to stop his hand from reaching up and cupping his throbbing ear.

“Yeah, but then you’d be too tense. Sorry.” She admits a bit sheepishly. “I really didn’t think it’d hurt that bad. I’ll numb your other ear with some ice.”

Gwen gets up and leaves the room, presumably heading to the kitchen.

Won’t that mess up the marker, he wants to point out, but he really just wants to rest his head on something cold. He can probably use the ice when she’s done and put it on his forehead or something. Would Ganke like it? How’s he even going to explain this to his parents?

What is he talking about— he’s worrying about nothing again. Both Uncle Aaron and his dad had pierced ears when they were kids, and his mom wears earrings almost every day, and Ganke literally has double piercings in each ear. Stop it, Morales.

He will need to explain how Gwen pierced his ears, though. He can always just lie about that, say she dragged him to an actual professional and paid for it. Or he can pull his, “At least it wasn’t with Hobie” card, but he’s felt really bad the last few times he’s used it.

God, he wants to scratch his ear so bad. He uncurls his fist and harshly scratches his hand to try and redirect the feeling.

“Okay, hold this to your ear for a minute,” Gwen says as she re-enters the room with a bag of ice, quickly shoving it in his hands. “Where’d you get those earrings anyway? That looks like diamonds.”

“Oh, some lady. She gave them to me after I found her dog,” he says, very carefully not mentioning the dog’s name because he knows Gwen would find it hilarious rather than anything else.

“So what made you want to keep them? Coulda gave them to your mom,” Gwen asks.

Miles looks away. “I don’t know. Guys sometimes have earrings.”

Gwen holds her hands up, “Yeah, I didn’t mean to imply anything else, it was just a bit out of nowhere. We should give you a piercing like mine next.” She snickers and Miles rolls his eyes.

“Oh toootally, because my parents would love that. No heart attacks and disappointment at all,” he laughs.

“Hey, better to ask for forgiveness than permission,” Gwen said with a shrug. “We can ask Hobie if he knows anybody who can tell if this is real diamond.”

Hobie seemed to always know a guy who knows a guy, and that guy happens to know a few other guys. Nobody really asked how he knew all these people because as a spider-person you’re bound to run into all types of them, but it didn’t stop Miles from wondering.

“Alright, time to countdown. For real this time,” Gwen says, grabbing her needle and pulling his hand and ice pack away, “Three,”

Miles takes a deep breath.

“Two,”

The pain is the most obvious answer, but why does this feel so much bigger than it actually is?

“One.”

That same stinging pain happens again, making tears prick at his eyes as he grits his teeth and tenses up.

“You’re done! Do you think you’ll need some painkillers?” Gwen says, quickly moving everything and herself away from him so he can stand up.

“Nah,” Miles shakes his head and tries to open his eyes, but the pain is dialing all of his senses to a hundred. Squinting, he shoves his twitchy hands into his jacket pockets. “I’m cool. Thanks though.”

“You are cool,” Gwen laughs, “Alright, get out, I gotta get ready to go out tonight.”

——

Miles isn’t nervous about what people will think about him with earrings. It’s more about them knowing he doesn’t really know how to take full care of them, and sensing his fear about them falling out, stabbing him, stabbing someone else, melting in his ear if there’s a fire, being yanked by a giant magnet a villain has and tearing his ear, the holes closing, the usual fears people have when they get a new piercing.

He’s kidding.

He knows his anxiety is pretty irrational, he looked up what the actual usual fears were for this just to calm himself down, but it didn’t really help. He trusts Gwen’s reassurances, but he just can’t help himself from double, triple, and quadruple-checking.

At least a few girls actually complimented his earrings, saying how they liked how “elegant yet chic” they were, whatever that meant. They were simple studs with no special shape or color, just a shiny silver. But Ganke liked it, he made that very clear when Miles stepped into their dorm and the boy stood up and started turning his head in his hands, smile growing bigger and bigger the longer he observed the earrings.

“Ganke,” Miles laughs, “let me put my stuff down man.”

Ganke turns his head to the left, and Miles sighs as he lets the other boy manipulate his head. “Who did these?”

“Gwen did. I was gonna use some other ones, but she said she didn’t know how to clean ‘em, I think,” Miles answers as Ganke then turns his head to the right, “we’re gonna go to Hobie’s soon to get them checked out.”

“They make you look even more beautiful,” Ganke says, not seeing Miles’s bashful smile but knowing what his compliments do, letting go and walking back to resume his homework, “you should totally keep them.”

Miles laughs shyly, tapping one of his earrings. Beautiful, huh? Ganke hasn’t used that one before.

——

“Miles? What’s— you got your ears pierced?!” His mom exclaims, nearly dropping the plate she was washing. “Jeff!”

Oh, great.

His dad walks into the kitchen, “What’s wrong? Hey Miles—“ his dad does a double take, “—WHAT are those?!”

Better to ask for forgiveness than permission my ass, Miles thinks. “Um… they’re… earrings?”

“And where did you get those? When did you get those? Huh?” His dad’s voice slowly got louder as he put his hands on his hips.

“Uh, Gwen took me to get them done yesterday,” he mumbles, shrinking under the gaze of his parents. Sweat starts to coat his palms. “...Sorry?”

“Ohhhh, he’s sorry,” his mom says, dramatically widening her eyes and turning drying her hands on a towel.

“Why didn’t you ask us?” his dad demands to know.

“I…” Shoot, he doesn’t actually have an answer for that!

His mom slaps down the towel and turns to face him fully. With her pursed lips and narrowed eyes, and his dad’s piercing glare, they make a furious duo that could rival the villains Miles fights any day.

“I… I can take them out—” he begins weakly, shoulders slumping in defeat, but then his mother raises a hand.

“Ah ah ah! No, you got them, you take care of them. You’re gonna do everything you have to do, since you can obviously handle it,” his mom says with her eyes closed as if she couldn’t stand seeing the piercings.

“Exactly what your mother said,” his dad agreed.

“They’re just earrings—”

“Aht!”

“—and I heal easily—”

“Miles,” his dad warns.

“—I’m just saying, it’s not that big of a deal.”

His mom huffs frustratedly, “Miles, this conversation is over. You’ll keep those earrings in and take complete responsibility, ¿entendistes?”

Miles looked between his mom and dad, mouth open as he fumbled for an answer. After he could think of nothing he just turned his gaze to the floor. “Yes, mami.”

——

Pavitr toyed with his own earring as Miles recounts yesterday.

“They were pissed,” he groans. “I’m never listening to Gwen again.”

“Dude, it was your idea!” Gwen exclaimed from upstairs.

Miles flopped back onto the basement floor, grunting as his head met hard concrete.

“I don’t know bro, they sounded more mad that you didn’t ask before you did it. That’s what some kids at my school complain about all the time,” Pavitr suggests, “did you sleep okay with them?”

“Yeah, it was fine. I don’t know why I was so worried.”

“Oh, that’s good! I was a baby when I got mines pierced, so I never had to really worry about that,” the other boy laughs, “so how long before you can switch them out?”

Hobie chooses that moment to stomp down the stairs with a small shoebox tucked under one arm and a bucket in his hand. “Might take six months. That’s how long this one took,” he said while tilting his head up and flaring his nostrils. Gwen followed down the stairs soon after. “But you heal faster than anybody I know.”

“Let me see those earrings,” he offered a free(?) hand to Miles, who pulled the black box out of his pocket and handed it over.

Hobie whistled as he put everything down, bringing the earrings under a small lamp he had in the corner. “These don’t look like real diamond.”

“Aren’t they heavy?” Pavitr asked, twirling a finger in his hair.

“Well, we wouldn’t know if they were,” he responded.

Gwen sat down next to Miles. “I’m sorry I got you yelled at by your parents, I genuinely didn’t think they’d be that mad.”

Hobie made a noise of intrigue. “Mad?”

Oh no, Miles can already tell what Hobie was thinking. Escape plans. Extra food. An extra room wherever he lives right now. “They didn’t yell at me, Dad just got a little loud, and I just have to take full responsibility, which I was already gonna do,” he explains with a roll of his eyes.

“Well, at least they were fine with it,” Hobie said with a click of his tongue, “not that you’d care if they weren’t, right mate?”

Miles nods before remembering that Hobie can’t see him. “Yeah, yeah.”

He wouldn’t care.

——

“But yeah, he was such an asshole, you’d think dying once would teach him to appreciate me a little,” Peter says to him on the balcony of an office building that they were most definitely not allowed to be at. He said it’s not illegal if they weren’t actually doing anything other than sitting and eating, and Miles didn’t feel like pointing out how that wasn’t true because Peter definitely knew that already, and how Peter was the only one eating. He honestly wasn’t listening to a word of what the man was complaining about, he had more pressing matters on his mind that caused him to visit in the first place. “Peter, if Mayday got earrings without asking you, would you be mad?”

“No? What? What does that have to do with this?” Peter’s brows furrowed as he dug around in a bag of McDonalds. “See, they forgot my nuggets. They always do this. Can you go down there and ask for some? Here, take this in case you need to pay,” he said as he handed over slightly damp dollar bills (ew). Miles was grateful for the suit gloves protecting him from the no doubt highly radioactive Washingtons the older man decided was okay to spread to others.

“Oh you’re being dramatic, it’s just sweat. You’ll get over it bud.”

Miles huffs and jumps off the balcony, scaring a few citizens who were trudging along the sidewalk, and walks into the McDonalds. It’s when he’s finally at the register that something peculiar happens.

“Hello ma’am, what can I get for you today?” The cashier mumbled, before yawning into her fist.

Maybe it’s because he’s wearing a pretty oversized hoodie and baggy pants on top of the suit, and maybe it’s because his mask is hiding his face, but could she really not tell? He’s never gotten called ma’am, not even as a joke or tease, but he feels like he should… feel. Something. Anything about it.

“Yeah, I’ll just take a four-piece nugget, thank you,” he says.

The cashier simply nods (or maybe she was just trying to pick her head up from falling asleep) and walks off. Is she supposed to do that? Isn’t there supposed to be someone at the register at all times, or is that just a thing in his universe?

She comes back quickly, handing over the little carton and accepting the cash. “Have a nice day, uh…” for the first time since Miles has stepped in here, her eyes focused on him.

She doesn’t know which word to use, he realized, nice.

“…sorry. Cosplayer,” she finally decided on, which somehow left him feeling more confused than her for a second. She really couldn't tell, even after he spoke?

Hey, hold on, he thought, nice? You mean funny?

“You too!” he said happily before exiting and returning to Peter. “You owe me eight dollars,” he told the man.

“That’s not how that works, you know that— ah. Well, I guess I should have specified how many nuggets,” Peter sighed annoyedly, “did you make any new friends down there?”

Miles ignores the question and asks his own from earlier. “So, if Mayday got earrings—”

“I already said no—”

“Okay, but what if she was a boy, and she came home with earrings? Would you be mad?”

Peter stops chewing, “No, what kind of— kid, if you got earrings and your parents are mad, then it’s probably—”

Miles waved his hands. “No no no! I know why they’re mad at me. Probably. I’m just asking because you know you’re like… their age and all.”

“Ohhh, you just wanted a different perspective. Well, I’d be disappointed in myself if she felt like she had to hide it from me, obviously. Buuuttt, if it was like, a belly button piercing or a nose ring when she’s… 16? Is that the age you can get them alone? Whatever,” Peter waved a hand, “I’d at least like to know beforehand. Any younger than that is… I’ll admit, I didn’t really ever think about this. But our healing doesn’t really make that a problem with a ton of sh— stuff.”

“You can curse around me.”

“I’m practicing for Mayday, have you considered that not everything is about you?”

“Aaaanywayyy,” Miles says pretty loudly, scaring away pigeons that were getting closer and closer to the bag, “the cashier called me ma’am a few minutes ago.”

“We’ve all been there,” Peter says quietly, as if laughing at some sort of inside joke. “Honest mistake, they must’ve been tired.”

“Well,” Miles picked at his shoelace, “even after she kinda woke up, she still didn’t know what to say, so she just called me a cosplayer.”

Peter hummed, waving Miles on to continue.

“And that was it,” Miles says. “I thought it was kind of…”

He thought nice earlier, and he felt happy when he told her bye, but now he doesn’t really feel anything. It’s like it never even happened, and the only proof he went down there at all is the now empty carton of nuggets balancing on Peter’s knee.

“… I mean, it wasn’t a big deal.”

Peter hummed again, wiping his mouth on some napkins.

“It wasn’t,” Miles felt the need to defend, “she looked super tired anyway, and she left the front counter. Is she allowed to do that?”

“Bud, they could spit in my food and I wouldn’t give a dam- darn. And I wasn’t saying it was a big deal. I even used to get called ma’am a lot when I was younger.”

Miles didn’t really believe him.

“Did you hate it?”

“Hate’s a uh, a pretty strong word for it… Sometimes I did, sometimes I just didn’t care, sometimes it felt only a little uncomfortable. Once I started growing facial hair though, that all stopped,” Peter explained, stroking his chin. “God, I need to shave.”

“I shaved. My um— my legs. A few days ago.”

Miles had no idea why he told Peter that. Peter didn’t care about Miles shaving for the first time, he didn’t care about how smooth and light he felt.

“Ooh, any cuts?”

“Nope,” Miles replied, a smirk tugging on his lips.

“Heck yeah bud, that’s what I’m talking about,” Peter replied and high-fived him.

They sit in silence for a bit on the balcony, watching people mill about to their destinations and birds fly by hoping to sneak a fry Peter hadn’t managed to inhale. Time always felt like it passed so much quicker in Peter’s dimension than anyone else’s, even Pavitr, and he was an entire day ahead of Miles.

Miles was going to shave his legs again tonight.

——

As Miles cleans his ear and piercings with some saltwater spray (the one from Gwen’s dimension was probably currently glitching out of existence under his bed), his dad passes by the open bathroom door.

“Good on keeping them clean,” he told him with a nod, suddenly stopping to ask, “…did you shave your legs?”

Miles felt like a few rocks were suddenly in his stomach and growing heavier with each nanosecond that passed with his father still in the doorway. “Um,” he swallowed hard and kept reminding himself why he did it in the first place. Nobody would care, he was curious, and it would grow back anyway. “Yeah.”

He doesn’t look to see what his dad’s expression is. He keeps staring at the mirror, willing for the rocks to go away.

Why are you so nervous, his reflection asks him.

Nobody would care, he was curious, and it would grow back anyway.

“You didn’t cut yourself at all?” his dad asks.

Nobody would care.

“Nope,” Miles said, popping the p to add to the faux-casualness. Because he was just curious.

“Huh. Good job. But we can get you your own razor, you don’t have to use ours.”

“Thanks, Dad.” It would grow back anyway.

“Oh, Miles?”

“Yeah?”

Nobody would care. He’s just curious. It would grow back anyway.

It’s just Dad, his reflection pointed out. He loves us. Why are you so scared?

“Don’t be lying to me about those cuts. I know you heal fast, but infections can happen faster.”

“Yeah Dad, I hear you.”

“I’m serious Miles. Don’t believe me? Ask your mother!”

His mom passes by the door as his dad says that. “Don’t drag me into this, I’ve already got my gown on,” she tells Jeff.

His dad huffs with a fond smile on his face, taking off his glasses and rubbing his eyes. Before he leaves to also go to bed, he turns to Miles one last time. “Miles, you know you can tell us anything right? We were just upset that you didn’t tell us about the earrings. I need you to know that,” he says softly.

Miles stops cleaning his ears and looks down at his legs. Bare legs. He can tell his parents anything. He knows that. He has always known that. But there’s nothing to say. He’s confessed to being Spider-Man, he’s confessed to going to different dimensions and his friends being from different dimensions, he’s confessed to how depressed he got after Uncle Aaron died and the true extent to how complicated those feelings got— basically he’s confessed a lot. There’s nothing else to really say.

Looking back into the mirror, his reflection doesn’t seem convinced. Nothing else? But you’re so hesitant about something, it points out.

“Yeah, I know Dad. Thanks,” he says, giving his dad a small smile.

——

He lies awake later that night, after a short patrol to try and calm his nerves, and stares at the ceiling. It’s normal for boys to shave. His dad shaves. Uncle Aaron shaved. Peter said he needed to shave earlier today. The boys at school shave. Almost everyone shaves at some point in their life.

There are still rocks in his stomach, and he doesn’t even know why. He could possibly blame the feeling earlier being caused by his dad questioning him so soon after he got in trouble, but that doesn’t explain now. He knows his anxiety tends to linger and be worse than others about things that aren’t really serious, but this is just ridiculous.

Some people shave. Some people don’t. Nobody cares. It’ll just keep growing back, and you can keep doing whatever you want to it, Miles tells himself, curling up and squeezing his eyes shut. Nobody cares, you shouldn’t either. You didn’t care before, don’t ruin it now.

——

Come Saturday morning, Miles is ready to throw himself out a window if it meant the constant stream of anxiety going off in the back of his head would shut the hell up.

He barely slept, and he’s sure it shows, because when he gets up to go get an apple for breakfast, his mom gives him a questioning look.

“Itching kept you up, baby?” She asks him, quickly putting her hair into a tight bun.

“Yeah,” he sighs. There’s no need to tell her about all… that, when she’s rushing to get to work.

“Don’t worry, it won’t last forever. Just don’t scratch, and keep cleaning them!” She calls out as she leaves through the front door.

His dad must have already been outside waiting for her. They usually drive to work together, with his dad dropping his mom off at the hospital and going to work himself, and then picking her up if his shift ended before hers. It’s a bit like how he and Ganke go to class— Miles will drop him off at his homeroom and scurry back to his own (almost always directly at the bell), go and grab him for lunch in the courtyard (or Miles would sneak them out to go get actual good food) and they’d grab the other at the end of class, depending on who got let out first. Of course, there’s the issue with the teachers not letting students from different classes in the room when the dismissal bell hadn’t actually rung yet, but that was an argument for Monday that Miles would inevitably have with Ganke’s history teacher.

Miles opens his eyes, not even realizing he closed them. Then he noticed the quiet, the lack of worries that plagued his mind, and how empty the house was.

Ganke probably wouldn’t mind coming over just to fall asleep again. Hopefully.

A/N: i hope i got across that Miles loves Ganke a lot and gets ramble-y when it comes to him because you will see it often #yaoiyodeler. Anyway when I wrote this it was a bit hard to capture the awkwardness that comes with an overly anxious Miles interacting with Peter, especially when he's unknowingly seeking validation for what he'd subconsciously deem non-masculine, without giving too much information so it could still fit once BTSV comes out (fuck that movie already), if you get what I mean? I hope it got across though

[normalestenstars]

do you have any personal favorite responses? ones that make your brain itch? or responses that make you go "they are SO wrong"

i'm going to assume you mean overall, so i will stick to the form responses for the sake of simplicity. though, i will say i found the responses to least normal form more interesting as people tended to be more opinionated/divided about their answers

this answer got a bit too long, so i put it under a readmore

Favorites from normal

i made a post about this some time ago, but whoever wrote "He's just a closeted gay teenager" for tomoya killed me

Favorites from not normal there is a lot

Tied btween Ibara and HiMERU tbh because HiMERU is doing something deeply insane and caused all of his own problems and made several other people's problems worse in the process. However, Ibara is a teen business major and that alone signifies he has issues.

Wataru instills a fear in me that the other characters do not. Yes, Mayoi be in the vents and stuff but like, hell stay there. when i go to piss at 4am in the morning and its pitch dark and i see something go by in the corner of my eye its wataru.

do you think i would be a shuP if he were normal in the slightest?

Honestly my choice was based entirely on the fact that I can put a name (or multiple) to everyone else's problems but when I think about Tsumugi all I can do is just hold him up and go "there's something wrong with him"

look i think himeru will win but considering how much mamas completely unwillingness to cope with anything ever has impacted both double face and just about every other story shes in i like had to. like at least himeru is capable of having friends without having a complete meltdown over the idea

he freaks me out. a little too willingly weird ((about himeru))

The other characters have their quirks, but Tsumugi clears the "says things that have made me audibly go 'what the fuck?'" bar. For everyone else, their freakiness might as well be Tuesday, you know?

He’s very interesting to me personally ✌️ like you cannot be in his situation and be very normal, i thinks. Hope he gets worse or better, either would be fun to watch ((about himeru)) ^^^ really like this one. lol

something is wrong with him like. deeply. unfixably i fear ((about madara))

honestly. let me preface this by saying crazy:b is my favorite group, but if you called himeru some sort of freak you probably got a chuckle out of me. like genuinely, what's wrong with this guy

Favorites specifically from the who should be on the least normal poll section

eichi is the only one who can truly contest tsumugi’s weirdoness and honestly he takes the cake. all the cake. every last slice. and others may try, but none truly hold a candle to these goobers. a match at best. maybe a sparkler if we’re feeling festive. eichi’s weirdo behavior is natural and genuine. his lack of normalcy has no pretense and is integral to his existence. he is the ensemble star and hes soooo weird about it. he should sweep the whole poll. every poll. weirdest in every unit.

Brain itchers all coming from the least normal form

apparently natsume once told sora that he's making bombs??? when he was clearly baking??? and that he'd have tsumugi give out the "bombs" so his reputation doesn't get ruined??? what story is this 😭

WHOEVER WROTE THIS ↓↓↓ YUZURU RESPONSE... CAN I GET THE ESSAY I'M BEGGING PLEASE where are you i only read gang 🥺🙏 LISTEN!!!!!! YUZURU FUCKING FUSHIMI!!!!!!! IS INSANE!!!!!! as a wataruP I am so incredulous that he won over Yuzuru. Because Yuzuru is SO MUCH LESS NORMAL!!!!! I already left an essay I wasn’t expecting to leave in this response… so consider yourself spared the Yuzuru essay given that he wasn’t one of the main options and that…. I am planning to scream about Yuzuru fushimi’s insanity in my own post bc HE MAKES ME INSANE. But just know. He should be here

a handful of people keep/kept mentioning whatever happened in raison d'être with the graves AND I DON'T!! KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS!!! I'VE ONLY READ NEVERLAND 🥺 IT'S MY ONLY VALK STORY OTHER THAN STEAMPUNK MUSEUM AND ANTIQUE LEGEND 🥺🥺🥺

Misc. thoughts because it looked weird if i didn't indent this section

as for responses i didn't agree with, this is a hard question to answer because i don't know enough about a third of the cast to strongly disagree. not to mention, i personally think that even if i knew it would be extremely rude of me to share and pick apart people's responses in front of a sizeable audience, so i will not. the last thing i want is for people to feel judged and ostracized over some silly enstars poll, and i personally do not enjoy how hostile this fanbase is to casual fans

like for example, i personally think chiaki is the weirdest ryuseitai member, but many people would disagree on that, right? and it's really not that big of a deal, because i understand why/how people come to that conclusion. some of these questions are really subjective, and are ultimately up to interpretation. just because i understand the text differently doesn't mean that another fan's opinion is inherently wrong. i think that's partially the fun of enstars in that there really is no explicit answer to some things, and it's up to the reader to draw their own conclusions

it hasn't come up often enough to address it, but i only feel bothered by people's responses when they overlook writer's biases and how that bleeds into the writing of some characters, like the amagis and adonis, somewhat mayoi, etc.

anyway, my sincere apologies if this feels like i'm personally lecturing you 🙇 i understand your interest in wanting to know this, but i do not want people to feel bad over mostly subjective opinions. on top of my own understanding of the text versus theirs, yknow?

i guess i could address the polls? for the normal unit polls i personally think hiiro, shinobu, hinata, and nazuna should have won their respective polls. i don't think niki should have won either but i'm not sure who should take his place 🤔. as for the least normal polls i think tatsumi should have won. but outside of these opinions, i do not wish to address actual written responses

[scummy-writes]

finally, FINALLY finishing @xxsycamore's ship chart after what? over a month? I didn't write out the fillables for longer answers due to CSP making the text unreadable, so it's in the post! I'll put it under a readmore, especially since I'll start rambling vaguely. @dododrawsstuff is who drew Constance's portrait in this!

Constance:

Green flags -> Patient, Tries at least once,

Red flags -> Will get drunk at times when unable to handle emotions, Stubborn, will hide issues

Gilbert:

Green flags -> coaxes her to think on her own, encourages her not to become like him, deeeeeep underneath his layers of clothes he does very much care about a lot of people enough to {*long winded rant*]

Red Flags -> Look at him.

How did love change them? Gilbert was willing to put his plans for a damn revolution on hold, due to*waves*, but him. For Constance she gained more confidence and self-love in a very odd way. Found a voice again, so to speak.

How do you imagine their bad end? Together or separate? Separate... Gilbert -> ⚰️, Constance forcing herself into a life she didn't much want in the way of quashing hopes and dreams to be 'normal'. ...Ok ok it's not that creative, but sue me. Constance's whole thing is about how she lets others step on her all the time until she can't take it anymore or learns better. She's not fleshed out and won't be for another year.

Together? hm... I am unsure. I feel like it would be a simple thing of her not living up to expectations, something that would kill them both quite literally.

What is the perfect story event for them? One where Constance can get away from the palace and people who know Gilbert a bit to learn more about him in a 1:1 setting and without a crazy amount of judgement. So like an island event- ashjbfsdfs kidding, but there are a few events about Gilbert strongarming Mc into a date, so.

If the other didn't exist, who would they end up dating? Gilbert -> ⚰️, Constance... I want to say Rio but also don't because it seems like a mean answer. I think she would either live alone or get with someone who seems decent enough and isn't crazy important to her.

i had this in my drafts for so long and Im tired of it being intimidating... orz the reality is that I haven't given Constance a coherent storyline, but this was fun to think about. Maybe in a year I can redo it.

[shaanks]

Hii! How are you? I wanted to ask if you could share some of your personal headcanons about shanks, i love that man soo much and i feel that i found my people on your blog

Awwww man hello!!! M8 first and foremost thank you so much for this message, this is gonna sustain me for literally ever probably. I love Shanks so dearly too, he's so easy to adore it's crazy ; u ; I'm so honored that you feel like you've found community here I'm just rambling about him and reblogging people that do words better than I do ; uuuuu ;

Here are some thoughts!!! They're not in any like particular order, just me tryin to retrieve something actually coherent out of the centrifuge I have him in in my mind lmfaoooo. I'm gonna put it under a readmore after the second one bc it got a lil long.

I think this one is pretty popular but it's also really important to me, but I do think that man is the sweetest, sappiest loverboy to ever be. He's so affectionate and indulgent and if he's in love with you, he's all-in 1000000% in love with you, really revels in everything you are separately and everything you've made together.

I think he's really, REALLY good at things. Cards, guitar before he lost his arm, honestly I think he is gifted and burdened with being able to pick up and become proficient with anything he takes any great interest in. That's fun for him to a degree, and would have made childhood REALLY fun, but he's sort of learned that it's hard to have fun with people and enjoy card games and whatnot if he wins every time and dominates the board. So he kicks his feet back and cheats casually and poorly at cards and plays slight of hand tricks and acts like a dork because he WANTS to have fun with his crew and his friends and the people he cares for. He's come to value losing for a joke and a laugh over winning just for the sake of it.

I think he pays a lot more attention to things than he gets credit for, and is a lot more emotionally aware and intelligent than he gives the impression of being. Part of how Shanks operates is in this kind of carefree ambient role, even in situations he feels a great deal of investment in. He'll stand back, and act silly, and play a little scatterbrained and flighty because it's a lot safer for everyone if that's how he acts. Plus, I think he's had to spend so much time sublimating his own personal wants and needs that he sort of lets situations dictate how much of his real feelings and vulnerabilities get involved. There's just too much at stake to act without careful consideration and responsibility, at least that's how he seems to me.

I think he's pretty decently well-read, though I think this one's pretty against the grain for popular fanon with him lmfao. He's a Yonko, and he's chosen the like kingmaker/steward/diplomat route as such. He has to travel around, he diffuses situations, he has to be able to communicate with people and understand the situations he's walking into, so like. I do think he has some understanding of philosophy and history (given his travels with Roger probably to a degree that'd likely be forbidden if it was well-known about), I think he knows several languages, I think he's able to keep conversation and find common ground through things like music and literature and things like that.

Steering back into less like somber-serious waters I also think he's soooooooooooooooooooo clingy (affectionate). Definitely with his significant other but platonically too, I think he drapes his lanky body all over people and rolls around and lays in laps and wants scritches, he's very affectionate and he loves affection in return!!!

Okay I'm gonna stop here for now, I could ramble about that man for literally ever. I have no idea if this is what you were asking for but if not, lemme know and I can answer from a different direction!!