#[it's the one achievement i have in my life]

[lorithescrump]

Hell yeah get ready for the info-dump of the ages, folks!

Cadaver Backstory Dump Let’s Go

Cadaver absolutely misses his adoptive family. This retired ranger and his wife adopted and raised this freak of nature left on their doorstep one night as their own son with unconditional love and support (something Cadaver doesn’t come by easily) and Cadaver will always despise himself for destroying that. He especially grieves his mother.

Cadaver was a very angry and impulsive child around the time his Dark Urges started to manifest, constantly getting into fights with the local children and even adults on occasion. He kept quiet about this when he’d come home to his family, keeping it a secret refusing to elaborate on how he got those scratches and bruises.

If they did take on any jobs it was orders from Bhaal. Cadaver was something of an assassin for Bhaal, but there were times when he would “hunt for sport” going after recluses and other civilians living in the wilderness surrounding Baldur's Gate who wouldn’t be missed. He became something of a "monster in the woods" scary campfire story/legend because of this.

Cadaver tends to speak in a stoic matter for the most part, being taught to be imposing and charming to demand respect and control, but when he is more on the casual side he uses profanity regularly and is a bit of a lovable douchebag. His charisma is his highest stat and his intelligence is his lowest followed by his wisdom and he’s one part chaotic good other part lawful evil so do with that information what you will.

Sceleritas job boiled down to three main demands: Keep him alive, keep him in line, and assist him when demanded. Cadaver had a very short temper and patience with Sceleritas (he did with just about anyone) believing him to be babying him and shit at his job but a part of Cadaver knew he'd get himself killed if it wasn't for hs butler.

Cadaver lives by the motto “loot everything” so he absolutely inherited some money hunger, pocketing all of the riches he'd loot off his sacrifices. He likely rolled his eyes at any merely extravagant gifts or offers but hey, it’s odd to look a gift horse in the mouth, right?

Not that I can think of or come up with off the top of my head, no.

The two treated each other like really shitty siblings, taking out their Dark Urges on one another. Orin loved getting on Cadaver’s nerves to get a reaction out of him and get a reaction she did with Cadaver going so far as to nearly strangle her to death (backstory of the scar on his mug). Orin loved tormenting and taunting her elder brother and Cadaver hated his infant sister sine her birth when he was a teenager.

Cadaver and Gortash sticking by and backing each other up in just about any conversation and Orin being her chaotic unpredictable self irritating Ketherick and Cadaver who are equally as desperate to get her to stfu so they can deal with the situation at hand.

Cadaver and Gortash actually met briefly in their late teens, becoming good friends after Cadaver accidentally saved his life (I like to think the reason Gortash was so fond of Karlach was because she reminded him of the other beefy Zariel Tiefling who fought for him and saved his skin as a boy). Later on upon being reunited in their adult years Gortash admired Cadaver’s drive and hunger for power and control and how far he was willing to go to achieve his goals and ambitions.

Cadaver was absolutely addicted to the praise and attention and was constantly drunk on the amount of power and influence he had over his fellow Bhaalists. He never acknowledged any of the cultists as people however, just things to exploit, fill up space, and live as proof of his worthiness of his father’s praise and attention. He was honored as more of a murderous emperor or feared gladiator rather than a celebrity among the cultists.

Having spent his boyhood raised by a loving lower class household and being shown love and sympathy from them has given Cadaver a subconscious sense of sympathy and pity for the needy.  During his years as a Bhaalist Cadaver would shame and scold himself for even considering showing mercy to the worthless and desperate, but he did have the occasional moment of weakness and sympathy. He claimed it was a one time thing, but this brief encounter would stick with him long after in the corners of his mind.

His beloved ranger companion, Lupus, served as his guard dog as well as his battle buddy and comrade. Any attempt at getting so much as a drop of blood from Cadaver would result in some wolf fangs to the neck (or crotch if you’re really unlucky).

A bit of both. Any targets assigned to him directly would be handled with some kind of tactical approach while any hits assigned by himself were absolutely impulsive and on a whim, being out for nothing but blood and whatever's left on the corpse.

As a child Cadaver was definitely mocked and made fun of for his appearance, looking too much like a human for a tiefling and vice verca. He did have an act of rebellion as a teenager when he got a rose tatted on his neck as a way to modify his “hideous and unnatural” appearance into something more presentable. In his adulthood he has grown to appreciate and honor his own body, showing it off and viewing as a weapon and a symbol of his endurance and strength. Bud lives by the barbarian “tits out guns out” philosophy.

As I am procrastinating and crafting backstories all in one go, I shall share a sheet of questions with you to share or answer yourself.

Past Life Dark Urge Asks - 1st Edition:

Do they miss their adoptive family? Why or why not?

Did they keep anything from their old family and home? A memento or a skill perhaps?

When Sceleritas fetched them from their comfortable home, what did they do on their journeys? Did they take on any jobs?

Do they speak casually or do they try to adorn their speech with frills? Do they maybe even dare to curse?

What was their relationship with Sceleritas like? Did they like their ever-adoring butler or did they try to run from the most wretched mother hen?

Bhaal loves money; did your Durge inherit that trait? Do they enjoy luxuries or try to live a frugal life, giving their all for their temple?

Did they have any connections or companions outside of the local underworld? If so, what were those connections like and if not, why?

What was their relationship with Orin like? Did it change at some point?

What would a typical meeting of the chosen have looked like when your Durge attended?

Gortash seemed to have admired Durge, what did they do to deserve this admiration? Did they have any notable personality traits or did they impress him in some other way?

The other cultists. How did your Durge view them? Did they enjoy their following or did they dread being idolised?

Durge gave a gold coin to a beggar once; why did they do it? Did this occur regularly?

Orin has her faithful group of changelings. Did your Durge have a similar 'personal guard' or task force at their back and call?

Durge famously acted as an assassin in the last decade or so. What was that like? Did they plan everything out meticulously, or did they act spontaneously and on whims?

Bhaal handcrafted Durge. Do they enjoy and worship their appearance, or did they have a rebellious phase, trying their best to change their Lord Father's grand design?

[astrosouldivinity]

Full Moon: Journal Prompts (Taurus) ✴︎♉︎✴︎

There will be a Supermoon on Friday, November 15th which will be in the sign of Taurus. ☘︎ ♉️ ⚘

This is a good time for cultivating stability, embracing sensory pleasures, and planting the seeds of your future and desires. 🪻✨

⋆.⋆ ⭒ 🪴 ⭒ ⋆.⋆ 🌱 ⋆.⋆ ⭒ 🪴 ⭒ ⋆.⋆ 🌱 ⋆.⋆ ⭒ 🪴 ⭒ ⋆.⋆

⛰️ 1. How can I create more stability in my life? What routines or practices can help me feel more grounded? For instance, establishing a daily self-care practice, creating a consistent routine, or dedicating time each week to connect with nature could beneficial. In other words, What small changes can I implement to cultivate a sense of security and balance?

⛰️ 2. How can I tap into my creative side to express my desires and innermost values? What creative practices bring me joy and fulfillment? For example, I might explore different forms of art to visually convey my feelings and values. Additionally, I could engage in crafts that allow me to create something truly meaningful that I’m proud of, and I could share my creativity with others to deepen my connections and inspire.

⛰️ 3. What self-care practices make me feel nurtured and secure? How can I incorporate more of these into my routine? For instance, I could set aside dedicated time to relax and unwind, journal my thoughts and feelings to gain clarity, or schedule regular check-ins with myself to assess my emotional and mental state.

⛰️ 4. What are my core values? How do they align with my current desires and goals? For example, if one of my core values is authenticity, am I pursuing relationships and opportunities that reflect my true self? Are my current goals in harmony with what I genuinely value in life?

⛰️ 5. What achievements can I celebrate that reflect my hard work and resilience? Consider both big milestones and smaller victories that have contributed to my growth. This could include completing a challenging project, overcoming personal obstacles, or even making progress in my self-care journey.

𝔁𝓸𝔁𝓸- 𝓚𝓲𝓴𝓲 💚

𝓜𝔂 𝓢𝓱𝓸𝓹: 𝙳𝚒𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚎 𝚂𝚘𝚞𝚕 𝚅𝚒𝚜𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜 💜

My Etsy shop will officially open this Friday! While I'm still in the early stages of my business, I'm looking forward to its ongoing evolution. Creating is a true passion of mine, and I’m excited to grow alongside all of you as I embrace this journey. ☺️

[ahmedfreepalestine]

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[lazy-sixteen]

Daniil why would you say that???

Watching Pathologic (classic HD) while on break from suffering in Pathologic 2, and it really struck me how different the first meeting with the Bachelor was in each game.

Pathologic 1, well, only a screenshot can do it justice,

(Yes . . . far be it from me to call myself a person of mystical inclinations. However, when I look at you, I get the feeling that nature is playing jokes on us. It is as if both the left and right hand have clutched the head to realize for the first time they are two parts of a single whole.

>Why?

>I get that feeling too. Does that mean that we are alike?)

That's like the first thing he says to the Haruspex, and while yeah everybody in Pathologic talks like that to a degree, even in game, in character that's a wild thing for Dankovsky specifically to say.

We just spent an entire playthrough as this guy mocking and/or having breakdowns over the existence of the supernatural - especially precognition. And in strolls this 6'2 resting murder-face dude with half-a-medical degree, widely thought to be a serial killer (kinda true), and Dankovsky's like,

"BTW, my heart is telling me we're kinda two halves of the same whole.😊❤️"

Absolutely hilarious. Even funnier is that the Haruspex, grumpy at baseline and currently having the worst day of his life (so far), can agree with him. Great first impression all around!

Then over in Pathologic 2, the Bachelor is high-key fumbling, like fumbling so hard you can get an achievement for it.

Carpetbagger - Remind a colleague of the Hippocratic Oath -- and fail

Not to meme on the guy (who is of course, multi-faceted and at his core deeply altruistic even if he often seems to have trouble expressing that on an individual basis), but initial Pathologic 2 Bachelorencounter is Daniel at his most prickly prick.

He gets Artemy's name wrong (possibly on purpose and definitely twice),

condescendingly demands the Haruspex be his errand boy,

basically calls himself the smartest person in a room of 2,

and can accidentally imply that he left a couple of orphan children to die because he doesn't treat mutts (he actually refused to treat the orphans' dogs).

Yikes - no wonder Artmey spends the first couple of Days taking cheap shots at the guy.

I mean in both Haruspex routes eventually he ends up very friendly with the Bachelor, which makes senses on a thematic level given the some of the Haruspex's major themes/ideals are connection and community. You could say their first meeting was changed to be funnier ("Vorakh") or more in character for the expected tension between two people under a lot of stress who can both be difficult to get along with at baseline

However, what about if we look at it from a meta-narrative level?

While you can play Pathologic 1 as either the Bachelor or the Haruspex on your initial run, it's pretty common knowledge who you are supposed to play first.

"Daniil Danokovsky's Fun Steppe Vacation was just the tutorial for Artemy Burakh's Tormentous Nightmare" - HBomberguy in Pathologic is Genius and Here's Why

This means that the player in Pathologic 1 has already been introduced to Daniil - even if Artmey hasn't - and the game reflects that! You the player know the Bachelor, you've been him, and you probably got really attached after keeping him alive for 12 horrible, horrible days.

Even though you know he can be a bit sanctimonious and dismissive, the player knows he's rational and compassionate and thus already used the evidence at hand to figure out Artemy hasn't killed anybody!

Of course one of the first things you (the player) would want to do as the new protagonist is check on your former avatar, and the game rewards you for it! Talking with the Bachelor on Day 1 as Artemy can raise your reputation - which is super critical. It might be the increase that keeps you from getting hunted in the streets or starving as shops refuse to sell food. What a great first (Second?) impression!!

Daniil's unprompted "hey are we soulmates or is it just me?" line is funny, but meta-narratively it is also true. They are the player's first two avatars, taking turns being puppeted by the same you as protagonists through the same overall story to two opposing conclusions. They are (your) right and left hand. You've played Dankovsky, (you) know this and having previously been the protagonist this new Dankovsky seems to subliminally know this too.

Meanwhile over in Pathologic 2, the only route is the Haruspex - disregarding the Marble Nest (worst day of Dankovsky's life [so far, ad infintuum]) which has enough time fuckery going on that I shall disregard it for this analysis - you can only be Artemy Burakh.

Either under the assumption that the player of Pathologic 2 hasn't played Pathologic 1 or that they've played all of Pathologic 1 including Changeling' Route's extended murder hide and seek between Dankovsky and Burakh, We (the player and Artemy) don't know Daniil when we meet him in Pathologic 2 as anything but the broken man we saw in the depressing into.

Is he our friend this time? Is he our enemy? Whatever he is, he's certainly a sanctimonious prick.

(Today's tragedy won't be the last. I was blessed with a naturally high intelligence, and my observations indicate that a very deadly visitor has come to this god-forsaken town. That's all I can say for now.

>...I don't like you, Bachelor Whatever.)

In Pathologic 2, both the player and Artmey meet Daniil Dankovsky at at his worst, and slowly work-up from there because both of us are meeting, getting to know, and building a relationship with him for the first time.

This is actually parallel to how you first meet the Haruspex in Pathologic 1 as the Bachelor!

If you are playing in the intended order, both the player and Daniil don't know anything about Artmey besides the serial killer rumors, and likewise you meet him at his worst - (in prison and later he murders a young woman to get Daniil the infected heart he needs to try and develop a vaccine). Much like we see the worst of Daniil's classism, arrogance, and inability to connect beyond quid pro quo (hehe, latin) in our Patho2 intro; in Patho1 we initially only see Artemy's standoffishness, brutality, and stubbornness.

Interestingly, following Daniil's themes/ideals of transcendence and rationality we (the player and Daniil) don't actually end up connecting much with Artmey on the Bachelor's route. The player is influenced by the puppet, and why would Dr. Daniil Dankovsky - whose route is plagued by betrayal, manipulation, and the difficulty of connecting to even people who do selflessly care for him (like Eva) - make friends with a violent, possibly dangerous guy who practices a sort of medicine Dankovsky doesn't believe in?

(I couldn't find a good screenshot for this, but mentally insert a picture of Artemy doing a roadside dissection)

Basically if Daniil is the player's protagonist he won't reach out, because in-character why would he?

If Artemy is the player's protagonist, Daniil will try to be friends in Patho1 (because of the player's previous actions affecting both avatars) or in Patho2 Artmey will eventually connect with him because that's in-character for him.

Overall, I suppose this means that Danii's instant and uncharacteristic buddy-buddy attitude with Artemy on the Haruspex route Patho1 is completely justified from a meta-textually narrative, as is his horrific fumbling in Patho2.

And it is also very, very funny.

[lagunapoint]

I've been thinking about something. Lavellan is the only woman in Solas's life who knows his contemplative, serene, and solitary-melancholic side. That part of him that outwardly yearns for peace and love, isn’t it? A woman who never manipulated him but simply listened (or didn’t) to his advice and sought his help. She didn’t know about his past, and he could present himself to her as he wished. It was a big opportunity for Solas to remember something forgotten about himself. Of course, he loves Lavellan, and the phrase about a "rare spirit" takes on a deeper meaning. Lavellan believes in the best in him, while everyone else around him sees only a brilliant strategist for achieving their ends. And this plays so well in contrast to his relationship with Mythal, who saw him as a means to an end, no doubt. She led him down the path of war. She nudged him, approved, and let him make choices leading, at the very least, to genocide.

Solas’s phrase, one of his regrets, when he asks Mythal to leave the Evanuris. Could it be that Solas admits he has doubts about what he’s doing and is ready to turn back? But then Mythal hooks him with the word love and he melts again. If she approves, then everything’s okay.

And here he is, left without his power, without his people, in a world where no one knows him, and where he knows nothing. And he meets a woman who is, for many, a symbol of faith, a deity. She begins to build her own order, faith around her strengthens, the power of the Inquisition grows, and I think Solas might have felt a sense of déjà vu in many ways here. However, this woman doesn’t choose the path of "achieving her goals through death." Perhaps it wasn’t only Lavellan herself who served as an example for Solas that there are other ways to overthrow a false god obsessed with the blight (hello corypheus, hello evanuris), but also the entire Inquisition, with all its advisors, companions, and the final victory, showed him that goals can be achieved differently. Maybe in moments of silence, he wondered how things might have turned out if Mythal had been like Lavellan. Maybe they wouldn’t have touched the Titans at all, and nothing would’ve happened. Or if instead of Mythal, it had always been Lavellan? I like this version better. Solas would have had an entirely different path. I don’t know, just an idea my head is such a mess.

And I can't shake the thought that Mythal wanted to remain the supreme deity, and that the true god of betrayal and deceit is her. This fits the logic of the updated lore good gods = bad gods. And if that were true, how cunning one would have to be to deceive wisdom itself.

Thoughts?

[movisual]

Jinx and Viktor have always been my favorite characters, but there is something in particular that I find so intriguing about their juxtaposition.

Jinx - She is Arcane-coded. Blue hair and eyes, the same blue as the Arcane. Heimerdinger describes the Arcane as “dangerous. A force of nature, science cannot control it.” This is a similar principle that people have about Jinx as well. Power and control. She first comes into contact with the Arcane as a child. Grew up to be around Shimmer. then when she is dying, she is given Shimmer to survive, changing her but keeping her alive. She has become the devil in people’s eyes. A face to place all evil in the world. Arcane, changed by Shimmer.

Viktor - He is Shimmer-coded. He is associated with purple the same way Jinx is associated with Blue. When Silco first talks about Shimmer, he talks about how power is for those who will do anything to achieve it. The ambition in his words surrounding Shimmer, the way people like Huck used to have their own power. Viktor’s arc in season 1 is about progress, power in making change, and he understands Singed when he says that people sacrifice love and legacy for progress. Vikto first came in contact with, what I imagine to be, a beta version of Shimmer. Then switched to working with the Arcane. When his life was at stake, Jayce used the Arcane to save his life. Shimmer, changed by the Arcane.

Jinx and Viktor were both supposed to die. Both have become a combination of Shimmer and the Arcane in their experiences and worldview. Both have been changed by it. Both are engineering geniuses from the Undercity, one became the devil in Piltover’s eyes, and one became the savior in the Undercity’s.

[itsnotbird]

On the Run

Civil War! Bucky x Fem! Reader

Non-canon imagine

Warnings: Language, acts of violence, mentions of Winter Soldier Bucky.

Summary: Your domestic life was good with Bucky, that’s because the two of you were skilled in knowing when it was time to move on. Now, Steve Rogers is here to ‘save the day’, and it isn’t what you two needed.

You used lay awake for hours on end at night, staring at the ceiling, listening to any faint noises in the distance.

That was different now.

Your body knew rest, it knew a sense of comfort. Though it took you awhile to achieve it, and though it wasn’t perfect, the peace was all you needed.

Well, peace and him by your side.

The mattress wasn’t necessarily something to rave about, it was small and springy, but it was a bed and it was suitable. The sheets weren’t pillow soft, but none of those small things mattered when you’re twisted together with a man who made you feel secure no matter what.

You wake to the sun shining in from the kitchen window and the sound of the street of Bucharest outside. Eyes opening, you’re face to face with the picture in front of you. He’s painted golden by the sunlight, face relaxed. No night terrors came for neither you nor him so rest was the only thing in the air.

Hair falling across his forehead, you reach to push it back, then trace the bridge of his nose with the tip of your finger. You gently smile, your teeth sink into your bottom lip.

“James.” You whisper, trying to softly stir him. “Bucky, the sun’s up.”

You’ve learned that there has to be a gentle approach to how you wake him, anything too hasty sends him into a panic. So that’s why you whisper to him before pressing your kiss to his face.

It’s a gentle kind of love, one that both of you have never experienced before. And after everything, all the things the two of you endured, it still makes Bucky wonder how it could be so easy for you to be so soft with him, to him. In his corrupted mind, he doesn’t deserve it, he doesn’t deserve to be roused by you nuzzling against him. But you reassure him every single time that he will never know violence from your touch if you never have to know cruelty from his. Maybe that’s why the two of you are so content in the way you are. You spent your life under the thumb of abusers, now the slice of freedom you have feels like cool water.

Refreshing.

Bucky stirs awake, letting out a soft groan as you kiss the corner of his lips before pushing the covers off yourself.

Those blue eyes open to watch you stand from the bed and stretch your arms over your head, causing the hem of the shirt you’re wearing, his shirt, to ride up past your thighs and flash your underwear to him.

He smiles to himself.

“I have a job to get to in thirty minutes.” You tell him, wandering off into the bathroom. “Nothing illegal this time…I think.”

Bucky rolls onto his back and chuckles to himself.

“It’s still illegal even if no one gets hurt doing it” He reminds, voice groggy.

You lean against the door frame as you brush your teeth, the toothpaste is foaming in your mouth as you mutter.

“I’m simply an undercover…intel associate who makes her living off of knowing things.” You say before going back to the sink to wash your mouth.

“You’re a spy for hire.” He states as he sits up, rubbing his eyes.

“So are you.” You argue, washing your face. “Don’t be the pot to my kettle, James.”

He rolls his eyes and comes to join you in the small bathroom, pulling sweatpants on as he does so. ���To be fair…it’s not like you could go work at the coffee shop.” He says, grabbing your hips as he slides you out of the way so he can grab his own toothbrush.

You hum and pout as you reach for the hairbrush, the one the two of you share because that’s how life is now, sharing things.

“I did apply for the barista position, they rejected me because of my lack of people skills.” You joke.

Bucky looks at you in the mirror, giving you a shrug. “You win some, you lose some.”

You study his expression, then turn to face him with a small, hopeful smile.

“Good day or bad day?” You ask, making him stop and face you.

Bucky nods. “Good day.”

One thing you’ve come to learn is bad days for Bucky are common, more common than bad days for you. Every day, the two of you ask each other the same question just to gauge each other’s mood.

And if Bucky said it’s a good day for him, then it’s a great day for you.

You kiss his cheek, making him give you a sideways grin before you go search for clothes of your own. Buttoning your dark cargo pants, you tie up your boots and go to the dresser drawer that should be housing socks and underwear.

Instead, multiple weapons look back at you as you open it.

You place a pistol in your concealed holster, then pull a jean jacket on.

“It’ll take an hour, two at most.” You say, coming over to Bucky as he watches you.

Reaching for his watch on the counter, you set a timer for how long the job should take and then hand it to him. It’s something the two of you learned to do when separating from each other, something that eases anxiety.

Bucky takes the watch and fastens it to his wrist, then tilts your chin up to meet his eye.

“Don’t get hurt.” He states.

“I promise.” You say, searching his nervous look.

“Don’t…lose control.” He adds.

You swallow the scared feeling.

“Never again.”

With that, he kisses you meaningfully.

Intimacy was something the two of you took a painfully long time to get used to. The idea of letting someone that close was a nightmare, and it took weeks and months after the two of you got away for you to determine what feelings were what. So nothing was ever casual, not when the only relationship you have was each other. In Bucky’s mind, once he figured out how to function it, you were the only thing in life that mattered. He can’t express fear or worry or love in words properly, but he knows if he locks his fingers with yours or kisses you a certain way, you’ll understand.

You always understand.

It makes things easy, you do the talking when he can’t and he expresses feelings in ways you aren’t too sure how to sometimes.

“Be smart.” He says when you finally pull away.

At that, you scoff. “I’m always smart.”

- - - -

He’s found that people watching is calming, like it helps reconnect wires in his brain by learning strangers habits.

Walking through street vendors, he enjoys the fact that his mind has taken the day off on torturing him.

As he goes through the produce section, he stops at a kind man’s booth and looks at fruit in front of him.

Plums.

Your favorite.

He remembers all the stories you used to tell him to get him to fall asleep, how you grew up on an orchard, how you spent days wandering through the plum trees, picking the fruit and laying in the sun while sucking the juice.

He has a brief conversation with the kind man and purchases four plums, just because he knows you’ll look at him in adoration when he presents them to you.

Today was a good day, he slept dreamlessly, he woke up to you, he’s out in public and doesn’t feel on edge-

There.

Just there.

Across the street at the news stand.

Bucky sees the man running the stand look at him a certain way, a way he shouldn’t be looked at. Crossing the street, Bucky approaches the news stand in confusion, and just as he makes a few moves forward, the man flees.

The headline on the papers instantly ruins the previous good mood.

The Winter Soldier, accused of a major bombing.

As he rereads the paper over and over in disbelief, the watch on his wrist beeps.

You should be arriving home.

He heads for that direction.

- - - -

You shut the door behind you and toss the keys onto the counter, walking into the bathroom with the intention of taking a hot shower to wash away the stressful job you just completed.

It all went okay in the end, and a wad of cash is in your pocket, making you feel successful, but it was a harder job than anticipated.

You pull the shower curtain back and just as you reach to turn the water on, the energy around you shifts.

Immediately, you pause, holding your breath and trying to listen carefully.

There’s the sound of boots in the kitchen, and you would claim them to belong to Bucky but you know the sound of his footstep, you know the way his energy feels, you know the feeling you’d have if he were on the other side of the door, and it’s a feeling you do not have.

Steve Rogers looks around the small space.

It’s minimal, a hideout he’s imagined in his head with newspaper on the windows and a serious lack of personal touch. He looks at the made bed, then reaches to pick up something that confuses him a little.

Once he realizes it’s a woman’s bra, he instantly drops it in shock.

He moves into the kitchen, and picks up a notebook laying on a shelf next to vanilla wafers you eat when you’re overcome with nauseating headaches and can’t seem to eat anything else.

Just another lasting side effect from HYDRA.

He opens the notebook and immediately notices Bucky’s handwriting. Flipping through pages, he finds a photo taped to a page free of journal entries.

It’s of a woman.

You.

It’s from when the two of you first found the apartment, you’re taping news papers to the glass, looking rather unamused as your picture is taken when you’re just in a pair of boxer shorts and a band t shirt that falls off your shoulder.

You’re effortlessly gorgeous.

Your name is inked under the photo with the date, almost like he put it there to ensure he doesn’t forget you.

A common fear of Bucky’s.

Steve shuts the book with the intention of taking it back to Sam so they can look into who you are and why you’re in the journal. Sam warns him through the earpiece that german special forces were soon approaching, and he responds, saying that he understood.

You pull the gun from your belt and take a deep breath, slowly twisting the door knob to peer out of the bathroom.

Steve hears a sort of rustle, though it doesn’t come from the bathroom, it comes from behind him wear Bucky has joined the scene.

Standing silently, he looks at Steve with an unsure eye, then looks to the keys on the counter and knows that you are hiding out somewhere.

Steve turns to face his once best friend and lets out a shaky breath.

“Do you know me?” He asks him.

Bucky’s heart pounds in his ears as he pushes through brain fog and tries to run through plans in his head. If Steve Rogers was standing in his kitchen, and the headlines say The Winter Soldier bombed the UN, that means he had to flee fast.

“You’re Steve.” Bucky says. “I read about you in the museum.”

You listen closely to the conversation, trying to run through your own plan.

“I know you’re nervous. You have every reason to be…but you’re lying.” Steve says, still grasping the journal in his hand.

That’s making Bucky twitch.

“I wasn’t in Vienna, I don’t do that anymore.” He says, and out of his peripheral vision, he sees you open the bathroom door just a crack more.

“Well the people who think you did are coming here, and they aren’t going to take you alive.” Steve says in a serious tone, taking a step closer.

“That’s smart, a good strategy.” Bucky agrees, making Steve roll his eyes.

“Where’s the girl?” He asks.

Bucky’s jaw clenches. “What girl?”

Steve shakes his head at the lie, then rips open the journal and points to your picture. “This girl, Buck. Be smart about this, I can help you.”

Breathe.

He has to remind himself.

“It would be helpful if you left right now before it’s too late.” He says, setting his things down and taking off his gloves, flexing his metal hand.

Above you, you can hear heavy boots and your heart stops. You push the door open wider, sneaking your way behind the soldier that’s telling Bucky it doesn’t have to end in a fight, that he could leave with him right now and everything would be fine.

That’s when Steve hears the defining click of a gun being loaded.

“Did someone fail to tell you that this isn’t a task for Captain fucking America?” You say lowly, aiming the gun right at the man. Your heart pounds in your ears, adrenaline and anxiety make you feel sick.

Steve gives Bucky a look, then sighs.

“You had to pick a crazy one?”

Bucky shrugs.

You circle Steve, coming to his front to let him see the angry look in your eye. “You want to see crazy?”

Bucky hooks a finger around your back belt loop and pulls you to him, muttering something in Russian that Steve doesn’t understand. Whatever is asked of you, you look up at him with a slightly scared look. Bucky just stares back at you, giving you a slight head nod, encouraging you silently. That’s the only reason you turn your back on Steve and rush to the closet, grabbing your back pack.

“Buck, I came here to help.” Steve reasons once he’s recovered his shock.

“Leading special forces here doesn’t seem like helping.” Bucky states.

“It wasn’t me who did that.” Steve reasons.

That’s when agents invade the apartment.

It’s a fight, rough and seemingly never ending, and the entire time that you’re trying to escape, Steve is there, trying to reason with Bucky.

“James.” You shout as you’re struggling to hold your own against the three officers you keep dodging.

Immediately, he finds you, ripping the men away from you. Once free, you’re trying to make it down the stairs of the apartment building, but there’s no escape from the troops that are after you.

Barely processing what’s happening as Bucky breaks the glass of the stairwell window, he’s gripping your hand tightly and coaxing you to jump, falling a very far distance to a rooftop. It probably would hurt a whole lot more if Bucky didn’t break your fall.

Eyes squeezed shut as you roll off of him, you pant with gritted teeth. “This is going to bruise.”

“Walk it off.” He says, helping you up.

As the two of you start running, Bucky suddenly falls behind. You look over at him, only to see him battling a…

Cat?

Panicking, you shoot just above the figure, startling it enough to refrain from clawing Bucky’s throat out.

Jaguar hero? Panther man?

“Here kitty kitty.” You call, gaining the enemy’s attention, drawing it to you instead.

“Jesus, who is this chick?” Sam asks Steve as they start to join the scene.

Steve jumps from the window you did moments before. “That’s what I’m trying to figure out!”

Adrenaline is pumping through you, blocking out the crippling fear that this could end badly. There’s a sliver of hope that this would be like the times before on the run, where you find some place new to be from. You and Bucky dodge all the threats, having a shared mindset on just keeping the other alive.

You’ve been in bad situations, but as the two of you end up surrounded by agents and police on the freeway, you think this is far by the worst ending to come of things.

So much for a good day.

And now everyone is being handcuffed, including Steve and the man-bird he has as a sidekick.

Why are all the jungle animals after you today?

Your knees are kicked out from behind you, a man grips your hair and shoves you to the ground, causing you to yell out.

“Let her go!” Bucky shouts from beside you as he himself gets detained. “She had nothing to do with this.” He argues, desperately trying to get them away from you.

“James, what did you do?” You grunt, cheek pressed to the ground, looking at him in the same position.

“Nothing!” He argues. “Just do what they say, it’ll be okay, baby.”

“He bombed the UN.” An officer says, tone angry.

“He can’t even make toast without burning it- ow! I’m really not into hair pulling.” You seethe.

The adrenaline that was once keeping you going has worn down and you’re shaking on the inside as you’re shoved into the back of a military truck.

Your leg bounces up and down, and if his hands were free, he’d stop the motion.

It’s silent, the two officers sitting in front of the two of you stare.

“You still having a good day?” You ask Bucky.

He looks over at you with an irritated look, not irritated with you of course, just in general. “No. This is a very bad day.”

“Don’t speak to the prisoner, ma’am. He’s a threat.” The younger officer says to you.

“This guy’s a threat? He puts spiders outside instead of killing them.” You say with a tone of disbelief.

Bucky says your name as if to tell you to not waste your breath.

You don’t listen of course.

“Hey, why am I not a threat?” You ask.

“You didn’t bomb the UN.” The man reasons.

They’re still stuck on that.

“Maybe I did. You’re not an expert, you weren’t there. Now, I’m not gonna admit it because I know how you narcs work, but I’m going to make you wonder.”

Bucky starts to laugh before the second officer orders the both of you to be quiet.

- - - -

Of course they separate you.

Of course they lock Bucky in some kind of inhuman looking box to make sure he can’t escape and of course they throw you into a room with nothing but a table, two chairs and a surveillance camera.

You try to get out of a good twenty minutes, then scream at the camera for answers, shouting questions.

Steve stands in the office and watches the monitor, eyes flickering back between your live meltdown to Bucky who sits still in his confinement and doesn’t do anything.

“Who’s she?” Stark asks, curious at the scene.

“That would be the side kick.” Sam answers, chuckling as you lunge one of the chairs at the camera.

Natasha joins the men with a file in her hand.

“This is all I could find on her.” She says, handing the folder to Steve.

He reads the information, then gets some sort of clarity.

“I want to talk to her.” He says.

“Absolutely not.” Shannon immediately says.

“She’s how we get through to him.” He argues.

There’s a moment of uncertainty, because the last thing they need is to get into more trouble.

But they do it anyway.

You’re sat in the corner, head in your hands, trying to keep your thoughts straight.

You weren’t a huge fan of being locked in small rooms, probably because a life of confinement is pretty much all you knew.

There’s a sound of the doors electronic lock being opened, and in comes the man you’d rather not see.

Immediately, you stand with your guard up.

“You going to try and shoot me?” Steve asks.

“You took my guns.” You simply say.

Shanon stands guard as Steve comes closer.

“I know we got off on the wrong foot, but believe me when I say I just want to help.”

You laugh, looking at the floor as he continues to talk.

“Is there anything you can tell us that will help his case? Where was he today? Yesterday?” Steve asks, and you glare.

“You want the play by play? Seriously?” You scoff. “Fine. I woke up at eight o’clock, I went to work and left him in the apartment that your guys ruined-”

“They aren’t my guys.” He clarifies.

“-and my guess is he went into the city. I came home and found you rudely invaded my home.” You say sharply, taking a step away when he comes another foot forward.

“I came to warn you that they were after him. To be fair, I didn’t know you existed.” Steve tries to reason, but you just laugh.

“He must’ve forgot to include it in his letters to you, sorry, he’s been a little busy trying to piece his mind back together.” You spit. “The entire point of laying low, is to not let people know you exist, and we were doing a pretty good job at it.” Your anger rises, and your eyes keep flickering back to the woman at the door and wondering if it’s locked.

You could take her, she’d be easy.

Steve grunts in frustration. “Clearly not well enough that special forces found you.”

You lash out. “Wouldn’t be the first time we’ve been found, but we could’ve had a plan if you didn’t butt in. We could’ve already been on a train in the time it took you to try and reason with him.”

Steve huffs and rubs his temples. “If you would’ve come with me, you wouldn’t have had to run. I could’ve helped you.”

“That’s what you don’t get!” You shout. “We have been fine for two years, we had a life, we had a plan for every situation and we didn’t need you. Now look what you’ve done! He’s getting psychologically evaluated, when everyone knows he’s not going to pass whatever test they have for him.”

Your chest heaves as you try to not let your voice crack.

You’re deathly afraid. All the images of lazy mornings and creative dinners flash before you and there’s that overwhelming thought that you’ll never know that peace again.

“I know you’re scared.” Steve says a little softer now. “But if you cooperate-"

The power goes out.

Just like that.

Emergency lighting flickers on lowly, and there’s a moment of silence before the walkie Shanon wears goes off.

“Everybody, get eyes on Barnes, now!”

Wordlessly, Shanon turns out of the room, causing Steve to follow. Though they shut the door behind them, they fail to realize the lock mechanism isn’t going to work now that everything’s fried.

“Idiots.” You huff, flinging the door open.

You run down the halls until you come across the office where they took any belongings you and Bucky had.

You were going to find him and the two of you were going to find a way to get out of this hell. Grabbing both back packs, you try to go towards the direction everyone is fleeing from, knowing that’s where he’ll be.

Maybe that’s the same agenda Bucky has, or more like the agenda the winter soldier has as he’s triggered to take over. He should have known better, that man claiming to be good knew all the right words to get his brain to switch over into some kind of kill mode. He fights his way past everyone who tries to stop him, overwhelmed by a feeling of loss, like he’s supposed to be searching and finding someone. You. That’s it, that’s what he needs to do next.

He stops anyone who comes after him, on a mission to retrieve you.

You burst out of a door, looking around for any signs of him.

There’s many bruised people on the ground, trying to get up and recover.

He had to be close.

Your heart beats loudly in your ears, backing up, you go to turn and run, but his large figure stops you.

“Bucky.” You gasp in relief, immediately handing him his pack. “We have to go, I think we can-”

He grips your wrist, not tight enough to harm, but tighter than he would ever grab you.

You meet his dark eyes and your face pales.

No.

This can’t be happening.

“James.” You speak, though he doesn’t answer, just stares right back at you.

The word is hot on your tongue and it tastes like anguish as you say it. “солдат?”

Soldat.

That, he answers to. With a tug of your arm, he tells you to follow, giving you no time to process anything. Though Bucky has told you many times that he isn’t to be trusted like this, you can’t help but feel like he isn’t going to harm you, not when he’s shoving anyone out of the way and guides you to the roof top helicopter pad.

He sits you in the passenger seat of the air craft.

“пребывание.” He orders, then goes to the other side and somehow manages to get the helicopter roaring up.

You watch Steve rush onto the pad just as the two of you pull away, he runs after you, trying and failing to stop you.

You look down as you get higher and higher, and no time is wasted, you’re being flown far far away.

He doesn’t utter one word, and you aren’t sure if you should either. Trusting him is all you can do.

About an hour later, when you’re far enough away from city limits, the helicopter is being landed in a clearing.

Even as you’re being pulled out of your seat and he grabs his backpack, he doesn’t talk. Walking fast to keep up with him, you follow him for a mile until you stumble upon a bus stop.

He sits you down, then tells you to stay.

He stands and sweeps over the surroundings.

“Soldat.” You say, clenching your hands at the odd place you are put in.

You didn’t think you’d have to experience this version of Bucky again.

Now you have to figure out how to make it go away.

He turns to look at you, blankly.

With a calming breath, you command him to sit. When he does, you try to ignore the ill feeling it gives you, a cruel remembrance of how perfectly trained they had him.

“You have to go away.” You say and it confuses him.

“I will stay with you.” He says.

“You don’t need to.” You reassure.

His brows furrow. “You are my mission.”

“Your mission is complete, well done.” You encourage, grabbing his hand in yours.

He looks at the contact like it’s so foreign, and your heart aches.

“Do you understand? Your mission is complete, your service is no longer needed.” You say, searching his eyes for the light that slowly returns as this soldier sinks back into hiding.

He takes a large breath and shudders.

Then his eyes are frantic and a little confused.

“James.” You speak, reaching to hold his face in your palms. “Hey, it’s okay.”

“What- what happened? Did I- what?” He frantically says, trying to process everything.

“You didn’t do anything extreme.”

He tries to manage his breathing, then examines you fully, making sure there are no cuts or bruises on your skin.

“Hey.” You coo softly, hand on his cheek. “I’m alright, you didn’t hurt me.”

There’s a sense of relief in his eyes, that’s when he pushes his forehead to yours in a painfully human embrace. You push his hair behind his ears, breathing in when he breathes out.

“I’m sorry.” You say, meaning it. “I shouldn’t have let that happen.”

He tucks his hand under your hair, bracing on the base of your skull.

“This isn’t on you…we just have really bad luck.”

You laugh, nuzzling your nose against his. “I guess we really aren’t done with being on the run.”

The two of you sit just like this until the bus pulls up beside you. Then you find a seat in the back and lean against the window while Bucky leans against you and keeps a watchful eye of the bus.

“What about the Netherlands?” You offer into the silence, twisting your fingers into his.

“You’re wanted all over the country.” He reminds.

Sometimes the world just wasn’t big enough when your face is on ‘be on the lookout’ posters.

“Norway?” He suggests.

“You really want to go back there?” You raise a brow at him.

“…Scotland?”

You think for a moment before nodding. “Yeah, Scotland will do.”

[five-rivers]

Listed in order of nomination. Descriptions of each fic are under the cut. Feel free to reblog and include propaganda!

Snow and Song - Danny has to participate in the school musical to graduate on time, while coping with new vocal powers. DP.

The Caterpillar Does Not Know - Due to his unique biology, Danny's body needs help from Clockwork to take on the form it was always meant to have. DP.

Pilgrimage - Sam, Tucker, and Jazz travel across the Infinite Realms to achieve enlightenment complete a rite that will ensure they become ghosts when they die. Sequel to Mortified. DP.

Cult Division - In which Danny is kidnapped by a cult for the purpose of sacrificing him to... himself. Yeah. His life is stupid. Also, his body's been stolen. Part of my Exhumed series. Corpse AU. DP.

Doorways - After a run-in with a monster posing as one of Jack and Maddie's college occult club buddies reveals Danny and his interesting relationship with the portal, the family goes on a road trip to check in on other former club members. DP.

Ancestral - Maddie is a memeber of the royal family of Avlynys. A family whose members are being murdered. Danny will need all the help he can get from family both living and dead to keep everyone safe. DP.

Danger First - What if the first quirk Izuku got from One for All wasn't super strength but Danger Sense? Featuring the undead peanut gallery. BNHA.

Long Night in the Valley sequel - Izuku and Toshinori are on the run after an ill-advised attempt by the Hero Commission to reveal Izuku as the traitor. Featuring alternate early One for All users because they weren’t all revealed when I started it. BNHA.

On Obsession and Free Will - How a relationship between Danny and Clockwork might look in an AU where Obsessions are absolute. DP.

Changeling - Jack and Maddie bargain with a strange Fae. Fertility, in exchange for their future second-born. They don't intend to ever have a second child. But then they do. Their attempts to get out of the deal have unintended consequences. DP.

Loved - Eldritch AU with aggressive adoption tactics. One of my few M rated fics. DP.

Take Me Higher - Danny explores the upper, rarified reaches of the Ghost Zone. Part of Kingdoms of Fish. DP.

[feuillesss]

how is the other riize members seeing seunghan's situation? are they planning something too?

How The Other RIIZE Members Feel About The Situation

***DISCLAIMER***

I do not know these idols personally! This is just my interpretation of the cards that I pulled, please take this reading with a grain of salt. For entertainment purposes only.

( day/month/year - 12/11/24 )

How do the other Riize Members feel?

Wonbin: (Death/TheWorld/2pentrev)

He wanted to go first, his energy was very open with this, though he didn't have much to say. It seems like Wonbin saw this as a period in time where a lot was changing, he was struggling to accept these changes and put them into action. He feels hopeful that after this situation, they can make a new beginning for themselves, there's a lot of hope here. There's some anxiety for the future, like will he be able to achieve his dreams and his goals. He's been feeling overwhelmed and exhausted by this situation, there's a lot to work through, a lot on his plate.

Shotaro: (7ow/10os/Kiow)

This situation has made Shotaro more determined to fight for what he wants, I get the feeling that he admires the effort that people are putting into this, the way they're standing their ground. He's working extra hard to maintain Riize's position and success as a group. "There's nowhere to go but up." is what I got from this. He really feels like they have nothing to lose, this is making him bolder, more stubborn and assertive. I think this situation hit Shotaro pretty hard, and it's been an exhausting period of time mentally, physically and emotionally. There was hopelessness, like his hands were tied, he didn't have a say in anything. He's being very bold now, a lot bolder than he was, like I said, he doesn't think they have anything to lose, so he thinks why shouldn't he be? He's looking at the big picture, he has a vision of what he wants Riize to be and he's taking the steps to achieve that. He feels like they're at the end of a long, difficult journey, their hard work is about to pay off, good things are around the corner. There optimism here, Shotaro's got a plan, and he's implementing it.

Sohee: (8pent/6ow/4ocrev)

Sohee believes that Riize will come back stronger after this situation. He's been throwing himself into his work, practicing his skills and really focusing on bettering himself. With the four of cups, I got such a strong feeling that it's toward Seunghan, 'get up, stop moping, work hard and come back'. I feel like Sohee was encouraging Seunghan a lot during this period. This situation maybe made Sohee realise the bad sides of being an idol, it broke his illusion in a sense. He felt like his life and career were turned upside out, just a general period of chaos and uncertainty. The six of wands was a little difficult to interpret since it came out sideways, but I got the feeling that he receives a lot of praise, like he should be feeling confident and happy and proud about everything, but he doesn't?

Eunseok: (Kiocrev/8oc/10os)

I think Eunseok was really being hard on himself during this period, like beating himself up over his mistakes or something. This affected Eunseok a lot, he really bottled up his feelings and withdrew into himself. I think he was just creating a lot of distance between him and the fans, there was a lot of pressure there. like pressure of making a mistake? He's very frustrated, like his heart's not in it anymore, he lost a lot of his passion for being an idol. He felt like people were being overdramatic and doing too much over Seunghans scandal.

Anton: (Kiocrev/6ocrev/6osrev)

Okay, I got all reversed cards in this reading, so I think Anton was one of the members that was more affected by this. I think Anton also lost a lot of his motivation and passion for being an idol, this situation made him realise the bad parts of being an idol. Like Eunseok, he thought people did too much about the scandal, and did too much with the funeral flowers. There's a general sense of annoyance, he's just done. He could be being colder towards people, and just a general moodiness and anxiety. He seems to be holding onto the past, missing how things used to be. He's realising that being an idol isn't all it's made up to be, not what he thought it would be like. The rose coloured glasses are coming off, and he's seeing it for what it really is. He feels like they have unfinished business, he does not want to move forward without Seunghan. He feels like they were forced into this situation, they had no say or control, he's resisting this change and is pretty annoyed by it.

Sungchan: (TheEmpress/2osrev/2oc/5osrev)

I think Sungchan is feeling hopeful! I got a huge optimistic vibe, he's looking forward to the future. I definitely think Sungchan was also encouraging Seunghan to come back during this time, he seems very in touch with his feminine, nurturing side. He feels like they've reached a stalemate, likely referring to this current situation with the boycott. They can't move forward, and they can't move back, neither party is giving up. He believes that they can only put this decision off for so long, eventually they will have to make it, I'm interpreting this in regards to SM's decision on whether they will bring Seunghan back; since in my reading of whether we would hear anything soon, I got that they were still deciding. I'm kind of getting the vibe of like, 'can't please everyone', and it's creating this stalemate of who they will choose to please. He's very confused about this, there's a lot of anxiety here, he knows there will be negative consequences either way. They're stuck between a rock and a hard place. He feels like now is the time to take action, to stop being passive and make moves.

Are they planning something?: (Kiofwa/Kiopent/2ow)

They're definitely stepping up right now, being bold. A huge theme that I got when doing this reading was their boldness, they won't be complicit. I definitely feel like they're working behind the scenes as well. They want Seunghan back, they want to be 7, that's clear. 2 of wands is all about planning, they're taking risks and working out what they want and how to get it. There's a lot of determination here as well, they won't stop until they reach their goal.

Are they going against the company?: (Knioc/3oc)

They're being very diplomatic right now, they're all planning and discussing, though it seems to be a positive environment. I'm just getting a vibe of optimism and positivity, a celebration, I think it's a good sign, I'm lowkey excited guys.

[genderhexed]

The most radical act of liberation you can do first and foremost is to gently care for yourself and your body. This on its own is an act of revolution.

When faced with the hatred in the world, especially toward you and those you love, the most radical act to counter that hate is to make the choice to care intensely (or at least, to work toward caring) about your own worth and ability to feel good, regardless of your perceived success, relationship status, ways you were parented, mental health, or any other benchmarks.

Sometimes the best way you can fight fascism is noticing you're thirsty, and getting up to get yourself a drink. Noticing you're holding tension, and breathing into that tension with compassion. Noticing it's pretty out, and going on a little walk to look at some leaves. Noticing you're lonely, and reaching out to a loved one to ask for connection. Noticing you're angry or despairing, and getting up to shake and move your body to help the energy flow through you instead of getting stuck. Doing whatever little acts you can to find feelings of grounding, safety, and joy.

Why?

Because bad shit is going to happen. Bad shit was already happening. Things are going to be scary. Life is an endless ride of both positives and negatives, and there have been a lot of big scary negative threats in our lifetimes. But you can either be confronted with these threats already in a state of fight/flight/burnout, or you can confront these threats in the most resourced state you're able to achieve for yourself.

We can't control what events occur, but we can give ourselves the best chance of being able to roll with them. There is so much strength and sense of control we can gift ourselves simply by deciding that we deserve the best possible choices we can provide ourselves in terms of comfort and safety. I can't control whether a natural disaster hits my hometown again. But I can decide to give my future self the best possible chance at coping with such a threat by building so much love and care into my daily routine that my body believes in a baseline of safety. So that when something happens that makes my body feel unsafe, it has less far to go to get back to that safety.

And these can be really small acts. Small moments of joy add up. Small moments of choosing the kinder option for your future self. Small moments of giving your body the kind of care it deserves; adjusting your seating position, having a nourishing meal, taking a shower, seeking out a hug.

The people that hate us want us to feel despair, feel hopeless, feel unsafe, because it gives them power over us. I rebuke that power. I'm going to feel taken care of and safe as often as I can regardless of what they do. I choose to give that gift to myself. And so I choose a quiet revolution.

[mer-acle]

i hold all the power (evil laugh, evil laugh)

Give me...

The big athena hcs

I desire knowledge and inspiration (evil laugh, evil laugh)

Haha

You kinda put me on the spot there. Not bc I don't have big headcanons but bc I'm like how do I phrase this without being like "here's the plot of that fic I wrote" yk? And now I'm unsure what constitutes a big headcanon... so I'm just gonna give you some more random ones and maybe you can help me out with what you were thinking of? (O.O)

For Epic specifically: Her owl form is a dark barn owl, bc they're really pretty and rare and have ginger feathers that match her hair

She dislikes Poseidon so much because he's so much like her father but her perception of him isn't softened by the love she has for Zeus.

Prometheus really saved her after Pallas's death. He kinda filled the void that losing Triton as a paternal figure had left more so than that of Pallas herself, but he took her along for his little creation projects (like the humans whoops) and they really match each other's freak. Yk. Until Zeus takes Prometheus away and definitely forbids Athena from visiting. I will literally murder him one of these days.

Speaking of Zeus taking people away, Athena was STRUGGLING after Pallas. Unsurprisingly, but still. Nobody but Hephaestus knows her from when she was still pretty openly mourning, they're all too young, and he never really asked why, but my girl was so depressed and lonely. She spend IRL HOURS in Quick Thought rewatching that battle and trying to figure out the moment where she went wrong. She knows Zeus intervened, but it doesn't matter to her, it's her spear, it's her kill. He was all like "for a nymph?" when she asked to take Pallas's name. "well, if you think that is a title worthy of your status..." It was her most open rebellion against his wishes for a while.

Her favorite domain is wisdom, but it's followed by crafting, not war. Don't get me wrong, she enjoys a good fight, but if she had to choose and wasn't worried about Zeus's opinion, she would choose crafting over war any day. The reason in my hc is how the domains are assigned, she was basically born with Wisdom, her powers are all about thought, and Zeus later assigned her with warfare which her powers work well with, but weren't technically meant for it. Meanwhile crafting is her "Passion domain" meaning her power in it literally stems from her intense enjoyment for creating. Imagine "What else can I do" from Encanto, but it's her discovering making clothes for the first time. The angst factor of this obviously being "My life has one mission, create the greatest warrior" Why is that her one mission? Is it the crushing weight of who she has to be?

My favorite bigger concept has to be her relationship with truth. In other words, Athena lies and manipulates her way through life, she is smarter than her father but knows he holds the power, so her council is whatever works in the moment, if she knows it's hopeless, she'll tell him what he wants to hear. Life has become a game for her, a game where she sells her soul for approval, bc she's lost those who loved her unconditionally, and can't trust those around her bc they're all trapped in the game with her, she doesn't want to be the favorite, she needs to be the favorite, it's the only way to survive, the only way for some semblance of safety and control, and yes, she gets along with mortals better than gods because they hold no power over her, they can't threaten the position she's worked so hard to achieve. Until Odysseus compromises a part of her that she hadn't thought she still had. Attachment never felt like danger with Pallas, but it does now, because what does it matter if you're more powerful when you respect the other person too much not to honor their wishes, should they tell you to leave them alone? If asked, she will have to leave, and that's terrifying (None of that would be overly conscious before My goodbye but for me, that breakup deep down always will be Athena being scared of her own feelings and trying to stop it before it goes too far and being at least 15 years too late.)

Woah that got dark lol I just wrote the last section and was like 👀fuck I am projecting SO bad. Like... gods I am so not okay. Jokes on me I thought I had headcanons all I have is trauma lmao

Anyways lol

Hope you liked it, and do let me know if you had something else in mind, I'll do my best :3

[bird-inacage]

The Heart Killers: Character Interviews (Kant/Bison Focus)

So this proved to be super interesting. Let us see what can be gleaned from these brief little interview segments with Kant and Bison.

Immediately, I'm struck by how serious and stoic Kant comes across. He has a very mature aura, and is quite hard to read (which I guess is a plus considering what he gets up to). I didn't expect this, based on how flirty and forward he appeared to be in the trailer, and that makes me wonder if it's all part of a persona he's playing. That the real Kant is more measured and introspective, or whether Bison brings it out of him.

A notable trait that gets mentioned repeatedly is Kant's care for his brother Babe. I believe Khao has made a similar comment about him being family-oriented. It makes a tonne of sense to me as to why Bison would be drawn to a 'family man'; someone who has strong family values, when Bison's essentially been rejected by his own.

"My goal in life is to make sure my brother grows up into a good man. I want to make sure he doesn't feel like he's lacking anything. We're all we've got right now." "I just live day by day, just keeping with my goal which is making sure my brother grows up well." This is so telling of Kant's mentality. Not only does it suggest that Kant is a stand-in parent of sorts, but that he doesn't live for himself. (Which could be something of a parallel to Bison - who is unable to live by his own rules). His goals centre entirely on his loved ones' needs being met and supporting them. This definitely gives provider with self-sacrificing tendencies.

"I feel like my goal is just to make sure my loved ones get to live their dreams. For now, I just want my brother to have a good life. But one day, if someone comes into my life and I love them, my goal would be to make sure they get to achieve their dreams." This again is such a selfless, touching sentiment. The desire to aid your loved ones to actualise their dreams, possibly before or over your own. I expect Kant will be a very doting, nurturing soul. (Lucky Bison).

I wonder if Kant and Fadel will empathise with one another over their respective little brothers, and the sense of responsibility that comes with it. Bonding opportunity perhaps?

The most mysterious thing Kant says is "One more thing I'm not a big fan of is the beach." (The reason is personal). Curious. First has specifically talked about filming on the beach, where they were able to do a lot more improv. Any speculations on the above are wide open.

Now let's move onto our resident Murder Kitten. Bison comes across as a real sweetie-pie based on everything we've seen thus far. He's very animated and expressive. Khao very deliberately uses a softer, lighter vocal register as Bison, which just accentuates this darling image. A real child at heart who wants to make up for a life he didn't get to lead. "I go out, I'm just trying to live outside the burger shop." His childhood dream about seeing the northern lights is just another example of a boy who has daydreamed of escape, and welcomes any excuse to be as far away from his actual life as possible. He also mentions being fond of a stray cat who resides near their burger bar, who he enjoys feeding and playing with. (Note: I need to have scenes of this in the show PURR-LEASE).

Everything about Bison as a person is so at odds with his violent lifestyle, which seems to be a pivotal conflict of Bison's character arc. It does beg the question of what if Bison had never been adopted, what kind of life would he be living instead? And I think this correlates to Kant's desire for Bison to have a new start.

Another note that's we've heard before in the pilot is "I also don't like liars", no doubt foreshadowing the fallout when he finds out Kant did exactly that. I do think it's likely that whatever drives Kant to take the detective job has reasons to do with his brother. He may wish to clear his record of anything untoward for his brother's sake. Based on this premise, when Bison does find out Kant's underlying motivations for doing this, I think that will help soothe any hard feelings.

On a side note - I've seen a comment mention that Kant apparently calls Bison 'kitten' in the novel. ERM HULLO?!! I will allow one spoiler, and that is whether this is true or not. And if so, I DEMAND that it is a featured pet name in the show, because why on earth would you miss an opportunity like that?

[finexbright]

grief to me comes in waves, some soft, some harsh. almost a month later and i'm still finding it hard to grasp the reality that he is actually gone. that one day, i was making coffee for him which he drank on his birthday and then the next i had moved a whole continent away and was sat in a completely different job reading about his death that happened a country away from me. and i think what hits me the most is that i was so disconnected from him in the past couple years and yet my whole identity was, is and will always be so intertwined with him and the band. i remember the exact moment i made his coffee during the last week of my previous job and i remember the exact moment i heard about his death during the first week of my new job, only a month apart, but how very different. i think about how in that one month's time my entire life changed and how he also deserved to have that, how he also deserved to change, to get better, to overcome his inhibitions, to seek help and to understand his faults and apologise for them and grow from them. how his child deserves to have a father attending his birthdays and graduations and other achievements. how at the end of the day, he deserved to live, not just become a headline that said that his story, his life, ended tragically.

[maxwell-grant]

I'm seeing several popular react to the Penguin show with "God I wanna see Batman kick his ass in the next movie". Which, for a show about a Batman villain, is probably an indication of succeess

Are you kidding me it fucking rules, there's no "probably" here, the show couldn't possibly have achieved what it set out to do harder.

I've talked with people, as Episode 7 was coming out, that they've managed to strike this perfect balance between making Oz the fun engaging protagonist to watch, and making him a villain that we'll want to face justice, opposite Sofia who tread the line between his Batman Villain arch-nemesis as well as the closest the show has to a hero. The camera loves her, the costume designers and hair stylists love her, the showrunner calls her the hero of the show, production folks who go on the podcast talk about how she was their favorite character to work on, while Oz, the protagonist, only grew darker and more despised and more fucked-up as the weeks passed, as we sit through 8 hours chipping away at all of his fun and charm and wacko comedy antics and motivations and all the scruples and principles that he turns out to have less and less of, that become less and less useful to him, until he butchers them all in the very end along with the heart of the show.

As I saw it around week 6, by the time this thing was over, Sofia would demand to be received with tragic applause and heartbreak and whooping cheers and love, but Oswald would have the children of the world booing and hissing and throwing eggs and tomatoes at him, and then asking him to come back so they can do it again. AND I WAS RIGHT, and also I WILDLY underestimated the degree to which that would be warranted, and I certainly didn't expect that, for the first time in my life, I would be unconditionally and enthusiastically on the same side as everyone who posted that Arkham scene, where Batman picks up Penguin and smashes him against a mirror, as something Battison has to do in the next movie. I couldn't believe what a stab to the heart that last episode was.

I'l get into the specifics of why this worked more on the Episode 8 breakdown and, granted, it's a lot to conciliate still, it's genuinely a strange feeling to be onboard with everyone else who wants Penguin to be flattened and crushed and humiliated, to truly hate him as a loathsome monster for the first time ever even as I love him in so many new fucked-up ways. This is, make no mistake, the good version of the Joker's Asylum one-off, Pain and Prejudice, Bullies, all those modern stories that are ultimately about nothing more than reminding you of a super-duper serious evil bastard this funny little man is, stories I generally just find too dumb and reductive and ugly and tasteless and trying so very damn hard to be scary without working for it. This was Lauren LeFranc slam dunking everyone who's picked up this character since Jason Aaron in 2007, including Jason Aaron himself, and wherever they take him in the next movie, or if they can justify another season of this, they've fully set him up more than ever as a guy we will want to be exploded by the Batmobile, that he not only fully deserves it, but must, be defeated for good.

Beyond impressed, don't think I could have ever anticipated how much I wanted this.

[redvexillum]

Hey there my sweetest, beloved Vexi ♡

I just wanted to share something personal with you that you can then share with others because I know that they feel the same.

Writing has always been my passion. It's been the one thing that has kept me afloat in my life. Regardless of whether people love my writing or hate it, I would continue for the sake of continuing because it is my life.

But when I rejoined fandom spaces, I was terrified after hearing stories of how the culture had changed significantly. Interaction is lower, and hate has unfortunately always made its home in these communities. Given I share fanfiction solely to share with the aforementioned communities, I found myself afraid that I would get hate messages. I was afraid I wouldn't have a community that would stand up for me if that were to happen. While it would never deter me from what I love, I was scared that friendships and positivity were long dead in this space. Fandom felt lonely.

You know what though? I have met wonderful person after wonderful person. And then I met you too. There you are, getting some of the most horrendous messages I've ever seen sent to another human being, and you continue to push for positivity - smiling and laughing with us about how much you just want to see people happy.

Then you went on to start share some of the wonderful messages you recieved throughout that ordeal, only to begin writing positive affirmations and thoughts for us. Once upon a time, I struggled to accept this sort of positivity, I will admit that. When I was having a rough time, I would often see messages like that as 'hollow' for a lack of better words. I would be angry or bitter that others could think like that when I struggled so much to feel like those words should have meant something to me.

While time has passed since I was that person, I still remember the feeling of hopelessness, yet that doesn't deter from the fact that people like you - and countless others - single handedly restored my faith in these communities.

People like you remind me why I cling to my ideals of treating everyone with kindness no matter what. To try to understand other people. To help others. These are all things that bring us closer together. People like you, @silva-daemonium, @fraugwinska, @macabr3-barbi3, @chrisemrysfics, @melodyonthewireless, @dewdropdinosaur, @xalygatorx, @kewpikayo, @jurijyuu, @jalicecookie, AND SO MANY MORE do so much to support those around you.

All of this came about because I wanted to say thank you for posting those short little messages of encouragment. I know that I have appreciated them. Sure, they might seem a little cheesy to me on a morning when I'm tired - but they really make me smile, and prepare me to tackle whatever the day gives.

You're the beating heart of positivity.

It's a fairytale ending to the horror stories I expected.

I know that other people will see this too, so I just wanted to wish everyone that sees this a relaxing morning, afternoon, evening - timezone in general! You're here, and you've worked hard to be here all this time. Everything you've needed to do to achieve that, you've done. That's huge. I'm so proud of everyone, and my DMs are always open to anyone who might be struggling or just wants to talk. I'll always aim to help my community in the same way that Vexi has demonstrated.

Love to you all, and again, thank you for your messages, Vexi!

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Cirice, I honestly don’t have the words to fully capture how much your kindness means to me. You are truly one of the most thoughtful, beautiful souls I’ve ever had the honor to meet, and I can’t thank you enough for your words. Knowing that something I’ve done has made even a small impact on people like you is still so surreal to me. I’m just deeply grateful that you’re part of this community.

You and so many others are the reason why I’ve stayed here longer than in any other fandom. It’s been the most heartwarming experience. This community, especially people like you, has genuinely transformed my perspective on what fandoms can be: a space filled with compassion, creativity, and connection.

Thank you for sharing your story, for giving me (and others) a piece of your heart. I hope your words reach others, inspiring them to create, to feel they belong, and to understand how wonderful it is to be part of something like this. Knowing we’re all here together, finding meaning in these connections, it makes the world feel a little less lonely and a lot brighter. 💖

Also tagging the people that didn't get properly tagged because tumblr is broken: @dewdropdinosaur @xalygatorx @kewpikayo @jurijyuu @jailcecookie

[comfybirdie]

5 REASONS WHY I REFUSE TO BELIEVE THIS IS JUST ABOUT A TOUR

I don't think I'm smart enough for plausible theories, so this is just a vent of a long time fan. I also have not read many posts, because I've been busy with life, so sorry if someone also said these points.

1. The concept.

I hope this is an album, but I wouldn't pledge my life on it. What I think, however, this is going to be something that brings all the storylines together from previous albums. At least from the Black Parade and Danger Days definitely, but I'm also thinking a bit about Conventional Weapons, too. This is because while yes, the tour does carry the Black Parade name and comes right after everybody spent time crying about not being in the select few to attend the WWWY Fest, the Secretary was not part of the Black Parade storyline. The closest thing we had eas the Director of BLI in Danger Days. And I think we all knew who this woman was the moment she popped up on the screen:

So what if Gerard's costume for the tour was the now undead Director, who became the Secretary of the Dictator?

2. The storyline itself.

I know every word to every album, from the singles to the B sides to leaked ones. But there may always be a chance that I misinterpreted the whole thing, maybe we all did, but the Black Parade is about the afterlife. Whether you got there because of illnes, war, it doesn't matter, you become part of the Black Parade when you die. I believe it to be a celebration of life, or carrying on even after the end.

What the Black Parade has never been, was a personal celebratory National Band, which is exactly what the post writes as the story. I'm going to insert a screenshot with the story.

I saw a theory that the entire concept is going to be revamped, which it might as well be, but even it doesn't make sense.

3. Because that's not what My Chemical Romance is.

And right now I'm thinking about the captions under the pictures.

After seeing the Secretary, my first thought about these captions was that we - The Black Parade - originally must have answered by wanting to be killjoys, the rebellious ones, but eventually we broke and stood in line, becoming the Dictator's beloved National Band, to which the Secretary replied: "Good boy."

However, My Chemical Romance never stood for that. They would never reward us with a tour for standing in line and shutting our mouth. They would never become the corporate machine they stood against since the very beginning. They would never lead the Black Parade in this manner and for this purpose.

And maybe it's just my naivety, the long lost teenager somewhere deep in me saying this, but I still believe they would never do that.

4. Foundations of Decay.

Has it been 2 years since this song came out? Yes. Am I going to bring it up? Absolutely.

(This is definitely overthinking on my part, but I was a history major and with the current events, the parallels are unmatched.) So the thing about wars is, you need people to fight it for you. You need soldiers and military leaders and all of them have to be loyal and obey the orders. The easiest way to achieve that, is by building an ideological foundation you can use to sway their judgement and decision making. The mustache man started with the theory of the back stabbing of the nation. During the middle ages, Christianity provided this foundation for the crusades in the middle east. If you give people something to fear or you give them something to idolise, they will be willing to fight against or for what you want.

And this is the Foundation of Decay.

"you must build an altar where it wells"

"Take his body as a relic to be canonised"

"You stumble through your last crusade"

And is you ask me, this is why this one song came out so much earlier than the rest of the project. Because they lay the ideological foundation first, and you need people to absorb it and truly believe before you can lead them with it. So you tell them again and again and again. Play it at every show on a tour. And so that reunion tour is when the Black Parade became the National Band, instead of the Killjoys. Because we sang along to every word, we absorbed it and not just believed it, but lived it as we attended the tour and sang when they told us to, cheered if they just came on the screen. We became conditioned to follow Gerard's orders as he walked on the stage, just as we will follow the order to play for the Dictator, instead of standing against him.

5. But empires and dictatorships never last, do they?

Rome fell apart. There is a reason there was a Third Reich, because the first 2 also fell. The Ottoman Empire also eventually weakened and fell apart. And just because the Communist Party always said that life is great and everyone is happy "In the Concrete Age", everyone who has lived in a ex-soviet occupied country (hello to my fellow Eastern and Central European MCR fans), we can all tell you, it was everything but true.

And so it is only a matter of time before Dictator's reign has to see its end? Perhaps maybe even bought on by his beloved band, put together from the misfits who the Secretary had to break to stay in line.

But, this is all just my theory. Thank you for clowning with me and my tinfoil hat if you read it this far.