so much happened in this whole episode but i’m still on fig infiltrating ruben’s dream, making it look like the place where his friend was murdered, and then disguising herself as kipperlilly & repeatedly saying different variants of “somebody needs to take the fall for this, and it’s not going to be me. it’s going to be you.” while adaine as the elven oracle shows up next to her. can you imagine waking up from that, the idea of a horrible truth being pinned on you by your friend to save her own skin while the personification of fate and destiny stands there, almost as a promise that this is GOING to happen to you. we don’t even know if this kid is guilty. my god.
if life is categorized by Before Loss and After Loss then I exist in the before but with a countdown to the after. and the countdown is always always present and debilitating. the loss will be debilitating too but i cant help myself. i will always suffer twice.
Thinking about that time when a popular artist was a prick to me personally (claimed that I "baited" them for a conflict when all I did was pointing out something in lore contradicting their claim, without any rudeness or condescension, and basically told me to go hang out with other autists instead of bothering them) but the reason I blocked them was not that, it was the fact that they've admitted on not even caring about the source material and just using scraps from it to do their own thing. Priorities hfngkfngj
Shout out to the max in my boyfriends system for not only watching thr first 3 episodes of 9-1-1 with me. But also for not asking me if I'm "okay" with what's happened to chuck. Because no I'm not okay. I am angry I can't do anything for him, I'm upset he's lost potentially one of the only things he loved more than me. I am mourning alongside him and I don't have the physical or emotional means to help because I'm fucking trapped in a body that isn't mine because of trauma. It's making me want to self harm and no I'm not taking this "too seriously" you wouldn't fucking say that to someone whose lost their husband to war or a fire or whatever, I'm feeling shotty because it's shitty. I watched a singular interview of chuck and spent most of it on thr verge of tears because maybe I am fucking allowed to be upset. Maybe just a fucking little because we're married. Is everyone happy now?
You will get you fanfics and your fanart and the moodboards. You'll get dumb posts and stuff still. Eventually but fuck let me feel things!
I’m enjoying FF7 Rebirth more than Remake so far (I was so sick of being in that uglyass city), but as someone who is not familiar with the og FF7 the sudden party member affection system absolutely blindsided me
Hiya! I hope you're doing well today! I love your characters and how you've structered their bios! Since Chuusday is listed first, is she technically your official WOL or is it someone else? Do you canonically have a WOL in the first place?
Also, I find it SO sweet that you and one of your partners both play FFXIV and have characters paired together ;w; Did you meet ingame or long before either of you started playing? Either way I wish you both the best!!! <3 - gardenofballads 🌻
Awaaaah! Im doing pretty ok!!! Taking time to answer this as a wind down from Emerald Weapon Ex Brain Soupage. And I’m so glad! ;W; I think I butchered one of those “Get To Know An OC” thingies- uhh… oh [this one] actually! I chopped a lot out and I think added a couple different thingums instead because there was so much to that that it felt overwhelming to try to look at let alone fill out LOL but it was a really good jumping off point uvu;
And!!! Hilariously Chuu was my First XIV Character, so she’s dear to my heart for being the first one- but she very quickly made it known being the WOL even as an AU was something of a Joke (Her character showed great reluctance and even frustration at having to do So Much World Saving, maybe a side-effect of me rushing through MSQ to catch up with my other spouse [Who plays Talia, though they’ve got less time for XIV these days ;0;] and the rest of my friends who were all EndGame already at the time in Shadowbringers fhdjfjsjfs.) So I made…… many alts. Throwing spaghetti at the wall but I have SEVERE side-character/NPC brain and kept making “supporting cast” types =w=; it actually took me like. 3? Alts before making an ACTUAL WoL with my husband (Ishi’li and Kizuna) (as of Right Meow, they’re in post ARR, but we’ve been working on Keathan and Tuesday together because Keathan was… Keathan’s first character in xiv XD so we’ve been jaunting through the story together and experiencing every inch of it so we can pick and choose what The Boys™ get up to when we wanna focus on them x3)
🥰 I knew both speece during at least high school- but I actually knew Keathan as early as Elementary school hehe 😌 tho the speece didn’t proper marry until… i’unno, 2017? (For frustrating legal reasons, I’m not legally married, but. As it goes. Someday we’ll have money to visit the one state that has legal poly marriages. Also I struggle to remember our wedding year 🫢)
Since managing to make a Co-WoL with my husband I’ve managed to make one other Alt meant to be a Solo-WoL (Mochiie) but I have to really wrinkle my brain to sink time into playing him, since I’m trying to take screenshots throughout the story at what I find to be inspiring beats xD And even still he has an alt-universe where he’s just a side-character for the ‘Main Timeline’ (where there’s a bunch of spaghetti and like 8+ confirmed WoL’s and the Msq entourage looks HILARIOUS in canon, someday I’ll get all the data together and take pictures, but I think it’ll cook what’s left of my brain x’3) [it’s less concrete than anything I’ve posted about before or I’d try to explain it ;v;’ it’s just interesting mostly to see how the story gets stretched to fit around a larger community of heroes than a solo guy shouldering the whole burden lmfao.]
🌸🌸🌸…. I also hope you’re having a lovely week @gardenofballads !!!! I am tossing flower petals into the air around you !!! Thank you for the ask and well wishes n kind words 🥺💖 🌸🌸🌸
K'in can easily be driven to putting blood on their hands. Early stages of their father's scheme, he needed to know how far he could push them. To see if he could make them work. So he'd set up connection banquets. Pretty faces, old and new, and let rumours run that he was looking for a new face of the modelling agency.
It took time.
Started out just as bad looks or petty squabbles to scare spme girls away. Some needed sprained ankles to miss audition days or make-up trails. Nothing K'in couldn't throw money at to soothe their guilt or forgive themselves for in a weeks time.
Until a certain woman, Anastasia.
She was just like K'in. Bright eyed and bushy tailed. Everyone loved it. She was a breath of fresh air. Didn't ask for anything. Accepted if it was offered with a pretty grin. Everyone was in awe.
They were, too. Sure. A pretty face. They got along well. Passed compliments to each other easily, genuinely. Shared fears and ideas for shoots they'd have together if Ana impressed the right people.
She did. The right people were impressed. She got a spot.
They had celebrated. Drank and giggled together over it. K'in threw it all up when they got home afterwards.
A peek into their father's office left them sick. Ana's face plastered over every inch of it. Their pictures on the floor make room for Ana's designs. Their schedule on a table their father rarely uses in favour of her own.
They had to fix it. It took some weeks to come to term with it. Hang outs were recent in the days leading up to her debut. Cuddling late at night, whispering fears and insecurities into the night.
They promise to never share them.
The big day hits. Flashing lights and articles everywhere. The debut picture. Both of them posed together. Matching grins and complimentary outfits. K'in showing off their toned legs and Anastasia centuring her pose around her chest.
It was a truly beautiful picture. K'in wishes that Ana hadn't already succumbed to the poison before the picture had been released. Sometimes they imagine how she'd look. How she would jump and scream at it. Over how beautiful they looked together.
Together wouldn't have lasted. One of them would have been devested in the long run.
Can I be honest here. Finally accepting that I am an introject both explained so much and has been very healing for me. Like after being in denial for 5+ years finally just going "ok fine yeah maybe I am JD from heathers the musical" was like taking a massive weight off my shoulders. Me when I finally accept myself!!!!!! 🐬🌈✨
