#<-I happen to have adhd but this is just ANYONE who stims :D

[dootznbootz]

There's something really special when you don't have to worry about your stims bothering others because you're with people who don't mind your stims or bother you about it! 🥹

Shout out to people who let others stim freely and don't make a big deal about it. You have no idea how much that means!

[thornyboi]

I just realized it's disability pride month so I'm gonna talk about mine ^^

I am a diagnosed autistic person and have diagnosed ADHD. Throughout my life I've struggled with various things. When I was little, I had no filter. I would talk to anyone and everyone (to the point my daycare was worried). After the *Big C* happened, I became quiet and closed off to others. For around a year, I was alone. But then I was put with my best friend in class and then a few years later, I'm here ^^ eventually my mom noticed me stimming and ticcing (will talk about later) a lot. Along with the fact that I refuse to eat any fruit or touch various things. Eventually I had brought it up to my therapist who had thought I was autistic. I got tested and am now diagnosed.

now onto (technically) undiagnosed things, tics. I...don't know why I have tics. They just kinda started. They usually happen due to extreme temperatures or thinking about tics in general. For example, I've had to stop multiple times writing this due to tics and since it feels like a million degrees in my room and I insist on having a thick blanket, I was ticking earlier. Most of my tics will be physical (hitting my head/chest, my hands jerking around, my head jerking to the side, etc.) but I will occasionally get verbal ones.

Happy disability pride month! :D

[anemonay]

2023 wrap up ( thanks @spaceoperetta for the idea, hasn't even considered doing one!)

-very long, been a big year for me-

tw: d/ru/g usage discussed positively

- also worst depression since college, but at least it's not the manic-depressive mixed state I was in for most of those 4 years

- BUT I also found the first ever antidepressant that works for me a couple months ago! I've been on a mood stabilizer that's "worked" for me for years in terms of controlling the hypomania, but I would still sink into low, low depressions. Now I just feel capable of happiness, but I need to rebuild those neural pathways since they haven't been used in so long

- my husband and I's relationship is much, much better. Once we moved things got really not great, and he is a lovely and great person but I think he'd never had to /actually/ deal with anything or question himself before and being in a new place, with someone holding him accountable, who wouldn't just ignore any of the ineffective things he was doing or any of the negative things occurring freaked him out a bunch, especially because he had no distress tolerance skills. I have my own stuff to work on too, but his refusal to accept what he doesn't understand really exacerbated my emotional reactivity and now I have to unlearn all of those habits.

- I found a therapist who works with my brain!

- my best friend moved to my city, and it was only supposed to be for like 10 months but she met her boyfriend and is blossoming and getting opportunities in her field like crazy so she's staying longer which means we can hang out more!

- knees got worse, but I finally went to physical therapy (because I maxed out my insurance OOP with the name other medical things I had to do this year) and it helped a bunch!

- a ton of drama with my husband's family. His youngest sister randomly decided that I am abusive (not even during like any interaction or anything, she just randomly started having an attitude with me 2 weeks before their annual (white, well-off people) family vacation), and then was cold to me during the vacation, and went on a walk with my husband where she essentially tried to convince him that I AM abusive. (Husband also handled it poorly - he's the "everyone is right in some way" type and didn't tell her she was completely out of line, but that has also gotten better thanks to couple's therapy). Then over Thanksgiving she decided to create drama with the older sister over her own poor behavior when older sister was doing absolutely nothing mean or wrong. It's been really stressful, we didn't even do a zoom call for Christmas this year which they normally try to make happen no matter what.

- I lost my job at a startup (blessing in disguise) and got a new job. The company is great, but I hate the work. It's not what I applied to do, it's way more technical and I would like that if ANYONE had the time to train me. But they lost a ton of people going from fully remote to hybrid, so everyone I work with has less experience than I do actually. I'm also struggling to do it because of how lost and flustered I feel.

- I picked up journaling and that's been so great and helpful.

- I went to Portland! I adored it very much. Though towards the end something about it felt vaguely threatening/heavy/scary. But I definitely want to visit again.

- I reconnected with my childhood best friend! We definitely grew in different ways but the foundation is still very much clicking. I'm going to stay with her and her husband in Seattle and visit again in May. She's so, so wonderful and I missed her so so much I'm tearing up writing this. We've continued to message frequently since, and once Baldur's Gate's cross play feature is out (fingers crossed) we're going to play together.

- I learned that stimulants don't work for my brain. ADHD stims caused anhedonia, coffee just triggers migraines, and Modafinil semi kinda maybe works but not well. I've managed to quit coffee for a week or so now. It's definitely an addiction. But chai tea lattes are filling the void. And the void also means that I'm getting back into tea! A childhood Internet friend is the one who got me into tea, and it feels very heartwarming to remember them through it.

- I lost my first cat together with my husband. You will be missed dearly forever, little man.

- I found my favorite d/ru/g! Technically I think it's 2-fdck that's my favorite favorite if my testing was correct, but basically ke/tam/ine and its analogues in general. It's so amazing and it checks all my boxes. I haven't personally experienced any negatives from it, though if you ever try it please read up on appropriate doseage, periods between use, and all that. It's helped me a ton with figuring stuff out, feeling motivated, and rewiring my brain. I'm weird and drugs have never worked the same for me as other people now have I ever had it impact my life negatively so please don't take my experience as advice or normal.

- I tripped for real for the first time in forever over Christmas break! My meds make it really, really difficult. Most people can't trip at all no matter how much they take on these meds. But I just kept raising my dose and bam, finally! I also had my first ever LSD epiphany and I feel like I can really move forward with my life. Tripping has also always helped my brain reset - like turning a computer off and on instead of just locking it or hibernating. I always feel so refreshed.

- I generally just feel more compassion for myself and more capable of being the person I want to be. Sometimes it hurts because it feels like I was on such a good trajectory, and then a ton of negative things happened to me with no support system and everything in my life just stopped. And then I was getting better and then COVID really broke me - at least when the bad stuff was happening I had stimulation, but COVID liked my brain. I think I still have it in me to be happy in the ways I want.

I hope we live in unprecedented times where history is made! Precedented times and the continuation of the normal just means the rich get richer and people die at the hands of oppressors. I hope things change for the better, greatly and permanently.

[that-tall-queer-bassist]

My personal Pros and Cons of my ADHD

Pros

-noticing all the little details and appreciating them in the fullest

-Emotional Dysregulation, because when I get a new plant, or find that one oddly shaped metal marble I lost a while ago, I am so excited it’s pathetic, but I love that feeling of pure joy.

-hyperfixation of the week/day/hour (i know some people describe it differently, let me be pls) . I usually switch between art mediums, and/or a few video games/social media sites. for example, I’ve been on tumblr for 3 hours as i write this, after not touching it for, i think a month?

-nuerodivergent friends. They’re just better.

-the ability to completely drown myself in information to ignore reality. Is it healthy? no. But i simply cannot handle another existiential crissi rn, so i will instead play minecraft while listening to alt rock playlists on youtube because getting spotify sounds like a lot of work.

-my ability to retain absolutely useless information, from either my, or my other nuerodivergent friends hyperfixations/special interests. I can explain to you in terrible formatting if it’s out loud, the evolution, history, training, anatomy and roles of the horse in our world, and how ao3 works, and what makes or breaks a fanfiction.

-Object Impermanence. When i literally hide myself a treat or surprise and forget about it, then get so excited when i do find/discover it again. I hide google questions, and/or song lyrics in my tabs :) its so fun. Also, hiding away stressors. Again, healthy? no, but i don’t feel like having anxiety all day, so whatever.

-Emotional Dysregulation, again. I can switch from sad or angry to happy and excited/content in a few seconds. It’s also great for getting my siblings out of their funk. ex., my sister is mad at me. I make a silly voice repeating what she said or cross my eyes at her. she laughs, then we can talk and have constructive conversation about why she shouldn’t get that upset about me “cutting off her reading time” when we share a room and I want to sleep, and know that she will be very tired tomorrow if she doesn’t also go to sleep. (We have this conversation almost every single night, i’m not even joking)

Cons

-Emotional Dysregulation. When i get upset, I’m Upset. Like, big time, ruining friendships and familial ties if i let it get out of hand, Upset. Yeah.

-Time Blindness. Constantly late, or early, or under or over estimating the amount of time it takes to do a thing, not eating til 4 because you forgot but you also should just wait til dinner, but now its 9 and I still haven’t eaten-

-Executive Dysfunction. I can’t do the things needed to function. Don’t have the mental energy to explain this one, so google it i guess? There’s a whole checklist of things you need to be able to do to function, and i can do like, three on a good day.

-Sleeping Trouble. People with adhd have trouble falling asleep, staying asleep, and waking up. So, sleeping trouble. So I’m constantly tired.

-Internal Clock is SLIGHTLY OFF. Nuerotypicals have that normal sleep schedule. Adhd ers have it shifted forward by, i think, 2, 3 hours. So we go to sleep later, and wake up later, and that’s the only way to get a healthy amount of sleep. My entire family also eats dinner super late, which might be because we’re weird, but I suspect the inner clock thing cuz we all got adhd.

-Object Impermanance. I hid my math homework one time. I failed that class. 

-Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria. Never trying, or starting cuz I’m so terrified to get a bad reaction. Constantly masking around certain people to appeal to the few of my Nuerotypical friends. Or, y’know, majority of my extended family. They’re ableist. and homophobic. And transphobic. And racist. and sexist. The list goes on, but, yeah. Never coming out to them! :D

-Masking. It’s exhausting and I can only handle so much of it.

-Not Masking around nuerotypicals. The shoot down after finally revealing my true thoughts, urges, feelings, stims, etc. just sucks. Super disheartening. 

-Squirrel or shiny jokes when they’re made by people without adhd. Yes, I do get distracted by squirrels, and shiny things, and dice. Stop pointing it out, and/or putting me into yet another box of your labeling. 

-saying that I’m lazy, worthless, or a disaster when really it’s not helping. I already have that internal monologue, you adding to it and giving it some truth/extra ammunition is not. helping.

-Emotional Dysregulation. Again, because mood swings. like, I’m trying to be rightfully angry with you. Stop making me laugh with you’re silly faces or pointing out of a weird face someone made in a picture you took. 

-the stigma about the hyperactive subtype. I’m inattentive. I have No Energy. Ever. Sometimes i have restlessness, but there is still no energy. Stop portraying me as bouncing off the walls, especially with caffeine. Caffeine just catches my body speed up to my brain speed, settling me down a bit, at least mentally. 

-people not getting when i say I’m overstimulated, or need some time alone to process or re-energize, and following me, or continuing to do the overstimulating thing. I will literally. lose. my. mind.

-when people shut me down after I share something that is really important to me, or make fun of me for liking something an “abnormal” amount. Flashbacks to overnight camp, when whenever I said anything about horses, they said I had to do five squats, and when i got really excited about discussing the differences in riding styles/types with another person who really liked horses, but rode english, they said that it was obnoxious, when i was just.. excited to finally find someone to talk to and who felt the same way after, basically, years and years of no one getting it or wanting to listen or talking with me about the thing. To this day I don’t discuss horses with anyone, cuz it hurts so much remembering that, and the fear of it happening again is still there. 

-seeing other people be ashamed about their adhd and hesitant to mention until i talk, like, super openly about having it, in like, the first 5 minutes of knowing each other. It just.. hurts.

-I’m super empathetic, not in a way that’s helpful though. Like, wincing, or limping myself because I saw you drop something on your foot, and am imagining it so vividly that it feels like it happened to me. Reading a fic about abuse or depression, and it hitting too hard and hurting me almost physically, and on a personal level because I simply cannot handle it. Feeling someone else’s pain so vividly that i can’t comfort or help them in any way, because I am so preoccupied with  feeling their pain. 

-never being able to finish things without starting something else. All the WIPs in my google docs, istg, i will be driven insane by it. 

(y’know, this was kinda fun. As a rant, but also as a way for me to identify things about myself and my adhd that i like. Like, I know its so much shorter, but I have a hard time with positive self affirmation, so it was kinda nice. I might do it again, but just the pros part cuz the cons are kinda depressing ngl.)

(OH, Y’all should reblog with your own personal pros added on! You can add cons if you’d like to :) I’m just interested in seeing how your experiences/feeling differ from mine :) )

[beauty-grace-outer-space]

your tags on my post slapped me across the face. yes fucking yes. the fall from academic grace hits a whole lot harder when you've been excessively built up and built up for years and then come crashing down. i constantly feel like im letting everyone and younger self down. the whole thing about IDENTITY is so true too! x adhd-vibes

Well, your post came into my house and punched me in the gut, so...

But no, I really genuinely appreciate posts talking about the gifted child + neurodivergence duality because it’s... a lot. And I feel like I’m only just starting to understand-- well, my entire life, basically. 

My entire life past the age of ~13 has been a constant up and down of thriving and burnout, a lot of self loathing and doubt over my perceived failure, and a lot of depression and anxiety. And I just found out last year that a fair portion of it can likely be chalked up to the fact that I’ve had ADHD my entire life, my parents found out when I was four years old, and no one told me. 

I started kindergarten at four. I was already reading chapter books. I’d finish reading the assignments before the teacher even finished handing them out, and be up and causing distractions because I was bored. They talked about bumping me to second grade, but I was already the youngest in my class and they didn’t want to create more of an age gap. 

I did first grade half in English, half in Japanese to keep me “challenged”. The Japanese teacher hated that I was so young, and after a while refused to teach me. 

My second grade teacher made a rule that I could sit any way I liked, or move around however I wanted, so long as I could touch my desk. 

My third grade teacher set up a play area for students who finished their work early, and I spent most of my time there. 

My fourth grade teacher recommended fantasy novels and read to us during downtime. 

My fifth grade teacher helped me and my friends start a writing club, and she’d read our short stories and give us notes so we could work on our drafts when we were done with our schoolwork. 

And then sixth grade and algebra happened and I could not for the life of me do the assignments well. I worked with friends in a study group. I had three different math teachers try to help me, in case one clicked differently. They’d watch me do the work, step by step, and one of two things would happen: 

1. Either I’d do the work perfectly, but the answer was entirely wrong and they couldn’t figure out why 

or

2. I’d do the work all wrong, but get the right answer every time. 

But since you had to show your work for full credit, I went from a straight A student to mostly A’s and a C in math, no matter what I did. 

My self esteem tanked. Most of my memories from middle school are of sitting alone at the dining room table sobbing because I felt stupid, and like a failure, and I just wanted to die, and sitting at a table focusing on only one thing with no background noise or stimulation was torture in and of itself. I finally got my mom to let me listen to the radio while I worked, and it helped a little, but night after night I’d sit there, sob through my math homework, and wish to disappear. 

All of the self-loathing and stress manifested into extreme anxiety. I started washing my hands constantly, because that I could control. My hands cracked and bled. I kept washing. 

I started self harming, and my mom found out and took me to see a therapist (who is still my therapist to this day), and I was diagnosed with OCD and Major Depressive Disorder, as well as Seasonal Affective Disorder.

By the time high school started, the handwashing had mostly stopped but still flared up again occasionally, and I was on track to graduate with highest honors following the “College Prep Honors” curriculum track. I made the National Honor Society, and did student government as well as zero hour choir and drama. I took Honors English and excelled. 

But to complete the degree, I’d have to take Algebra I freshman year, Algebra II Honors sophomore year, Algebra III/Trig junior year, and Calculus senior year. 

I got a C in Algebra I. I lost my National Honor Society status because of the GPA drop. I quit student government because I was ashamed. 

I was told to drop Algebra II Honors two weeks in, because I was going to fail the class. This meant I would not get the diploma I wanted, but the secondary “College Prep” diploma. 

I fell into a deep depression, decided I was stupid, and stopped trying. My report cards after that for the rest of high school were an assortment of A’s, B’s, C’s, even a D or two. I hated myself for not living up to my potential, for being a disappointment to my parents, for being so stupid. 

I went back to therapy. I graduated high school. I went to college. I burnt out. 

I took a gap year because I was suicidal and didn’t know what to do. I went back to therapy. 

I transferred to a university. I burnt out. I dropped out, because I was suicidal and didn’t know what to do. I went back to therapy. 

And when I was 27 years old, I found a box of old school stuff from elementary school, and as my mom and I laughed about it she told me that an administrator who specialized in identifying attention deficit disorders had observed me in kindergarten at the request of my teacher because I was causing distractions, told them that he was entirely certain I had what was at the time called ADD... and not to have me officially diagnosed in order to keep it out of my school record and avoid any “challenges to my desired educational path”.  

Teachers were told, and chosen specifically to work with me and not against me, which I appreciate greatly. 

I was never told. 

On the one hand, I can see how my parents just didn’t want me to go through life believing I had something “wrong” with me, didn’t want me to be held back from pursuing any classes I wanted to take because of my “diagnosis”, and didn’t want me to be “unnecessarily medicated”. I appreciate the time and care that went into trying to guide me along and give me safe environments to be my authentic self without being told it was a hindrance or a “problem”. 

But the more I learn the more I can’t help but wish someone had told me. 

Because I spent the last 16 years of my life thinking that somewhere along the way I had “lost” something, or “failed”, and really it was a pretty predictable and manageable sequence of events. 

I’ve since learned that a lot of the things I’ve always done that I’ve felt uncomfortable or “odd” about... are stims. Minor ones, but stims, nonetheless. 

I’ve since learned that I was bullied pretty severely for being “weird” in elementary school, but I have no memory of it. 

I’ve since learned that dyscalculia is thing, and very well could have contributed to my ongoing struggle with math. 

And for the rest of my life I will wonder if knowing would have changed anything. If my depression is a side effect of this thing I didn’t know about myself, or a separate piece of me. Who I might have been if my entire identity wasn’t tied to my perceived sudden loss of intelligence and potential. 

Anyway. I’ve rambled quite enough. If anyone wants to talk about any of this, or vent, or ask questions, feel free. This is the post we are referring to, by the by. 

[rottenrodentruby]

And now... Pinky Suavo headcanons because I can~ <333

While purple is his favorite color, he also loves red and pink.

Valentines Day is his favorite holiday

Likes the lovecore aesthetic

Wears both cologne and perfume (mostly the ones with a rosey fragrance)

Would definitely wear makeup (I can see him using eyeliner and purple eyeshadow for his lavish looks)

Suavo sleeps with a pair of purple satin silk pajamas on with a matching eyemask. The top is long sleeved and buttoned loosely with black frills at the end of the sleeves. The bottoms are shorts also with black frills.

Suavo wears his usual purple robe loosely because oooo seggsy aaaAAAAAAAAAA-

Loves to read angsty romance novels. And ones that are steamy don’t @ me-

Bisexual chad like all Pinkies

Theater kid (totally did not steal that headcanon from Sil-)

A very dapper gentleman who respects women. Take it or leave it.

Strawberry is his favorite ice cream flavor

LOVES alcoholic beverages. Mostly likes champagne, fancy liquor, wine (especially Rosé), vodka, cocktails and even alcohols that are considered “girly”.

Suavo likes to decorate things with roses despite Brain’s allergies.

Wears nail polish 💅

Is a good singer and would definitely do karaoke, love songs, and sing you serenades.

Suavo is a big ol’ softie for someone he loves inside and out and is very good at making the first mood and flirting.

Can dance very well. Not only do I imagine him being a disco man, I can also see him doing ballet and stuff like that.

Suavo purrs when he’s being fluffy with you and it’s the most soothing thing to listen to. You’re practically play dough.

Certified fashion icon he will rock any outfit he wears

His fur is silky smooth and soft~. It even smells good with whatever cologne/perfume he’s wearing.

A top. That is all. /j

Loves doing photo ops for magazine covers, albums, etc. he especially does pinups too~.

Bathes with bubble bath and rose petals in his water and candlelight because yes

Suavo would enjoy listening to smooth jazz to relax, even when he’s spending time with you.

Despite being skinny AF, he also has a little bit of muscle too! He can look like a twig and you can still grate cheese on his abs-

I just imagine Suavo doing tango with you

Likes to have latte and a croissant in the morning because French

Suavo will not tolerate anyone not pronouncing croissant as “kwason”

Not only can he sing he can rap 😎

I imagine that Pinky Suavo is an expert in therapeutic massage

Flexible AF

A very sassy boy

Okay, now I’ve recently seen people complaining that Pinky Suavo does not have his verbal tics and doesn’t show any neurodivergent qualities. My ADHD having ass begs to differ. Pinky is still neurodiverse even when he’s Suavo! So here’s why, along with some neurodiverse headcanons sprinkled in.

“Yeeeees~!” is his main verbal stim/tic.

He slicks his hair and ears back as a stim.

Dance, fashion, and music are his hyperfixations.

Suavo twirls his mustache like it’s a fun little fidget toy! <3

He’s hyper empathetic, especially towards someone he loves like you <3

Definitely would be the type of man to imagine badass andsexy music videos of himself to some music.

I can just imagine Suavo having texture issues when it comes to certain articles of clothing

Mumbles incoherent French to himself when he’s feeling overstimulated

Would definitely dance and/or sing as a stim

Wrist flicks as a stim

Still says narf, zort, poit, etc. but doesn’t do it in public very often because he fears he’ll be frowned upon for doing so.

Pinky Suavo does masking because he fears that nobody would like to see a celebrity being openly neurodiverse when that isn’t true.

Off topic but it pissed me off when the fangirls became disgusted by Pinky Suavo being neurodivergent and rejecting him. It shows how hurtful ableism can be, especially when it comes to media and the entertainment industry.

Suavo’s facial expressions would sometimes stay as one expression like some ND people have. Like his bedroom eye look for example.

Has no need to mask when he’s around you because he knows you love and support him

Now it’s time for some self indulgent simpy fluff headcanons so don’t throttle me I just love him a lot

Pinky Suavo loves it when you sit on his lap (he’s very comfy)

Pinky Suavo loves soft silky textures, even ones like your smooth warm skin. He loves to kiss it when he’s all cuddly and fluffy with you.

He will wrap his tail around your waist like it’s a belt of love

His body is so warm and snuggly and it’s perfect for cuddling

Suavo’s heartbeat is super soothing and it makes it fun for you to listen to

Suavo loves to give you neck kisses

Affectionate and passionate towards you at the same time

Playing with his mustache makes him a blushy and flustered mess

Loves to carry you and just hold you in his arms~

You and Suavo will discuss hyperfixations together with no end and no problems

Suavo loves to play with your hair. He’ll also style it all up, make it pretty and decorate it with rose hair clips (or better yet, flower crowns).

Pinky Suavo will not hesitate on pampering you. You’re like a little Barbie doll and he loves you a lot.

You would also flirt with him too. His charisma has rubbed off on you. And whenever you do flirt with him, he becomes all gushy and lovey doveyyy~.

To tease you, he says “narf” in a prolonged purring tone. Your legs become jelly and your skin is shrouded with goosebumps each time you hear it.

H A N D H O L D I N G

Calls you fluffy pet names like mon amour, mon cheri, rose blossom, baby, deary, darling, etc.

You would also give him pet names too. He LOVES that.

Cuddles and hugs you like a koala when you and him sleep together. He wants to be as close and snug to you as possible.

He will become H Y S T E R I C A L if anything bad happens to you, even when it’s a minor injury, like a paper cut.

If you’re ever having a bad day, Pinky Suavo will make the effort to comfort you until you’re feeling better again. Whether it be cuddling in a blanket and exchanging nuzzles and kisses, or a slow dance session alone with him in his bedroom.

Tummy is soft pillow,,,, S O M F T

Pinky Suavo wants to make every date with you impressive as possible when he really doesn’t have to. All that matters is that you love him and spending time with him. And him hearing you tell him that makes him so happy that he hugs you and kisses your face all over and AAAAAAAA-

cw // suggestive ................................................................................................................... Makeout sessions with Suavo are *chef’s kiss* c'est magnifique

Duets with Suavooooooooooo

He would definitely be the kind of man to feed you snacks on dates

Now I just imagine you and Suavo becoming so affectionate for each other you happy stim together~

Okay I think that’s all the headcanons I have! If there’s any more you would like me to add here, leave a reply under this post! Thanks and I hope you love this!

[joyfully-it-devours]

A collection of semi weird/niche headcanons inspired by my friend soy let’s go

Leonard Burton has eight eyes on his face, one on his neck, and one on the back of each of his hands.

Earl Harlan died on his 19th birthday. His 19th birthday was in November of 1983. missle launch and the unraveling of all things nerfed his age and got him in a time loop

Leonard is also non-binary (he/they) and bi. he is not excluded from the ‘nobody in nightvale is cishet’ rule just because he fucks.

Kevin had half of his hair dyed black pre strex

Lauren loves bees and will buy any bee themed accessories she can

Carlos sewed Kevin’s third eye socket shut in the d/o, as it was taken out very roughly unlike the other two, and left a nasty gash that wasn’t doing anyone any good

Donovan doesn’t have any extreme powers that his dads know of, however he can teleport and will be found in the snack cupboard after Charles told him no

CHARLES HAS BIG HANDS. Almost like paws but not quite! they’re heavy and good for holding

Carlos’ lab coats are equally as ridiculous as cecils outfits. He will buy or paint the weirdest patterns and images, bedazzle them, put an entire pin collection on the lapels, the whole works

Once you become a citizen™️ of Night Vale (or db) you will get something to show for it. It could be small. A flash of the eyes in a different color when you’re excited, stronger teeth.. or, it could be bigger. Who knows!

If you have a weird relationship with death in night vale (like earl or leonard) people can tell. You will have permanent marks on your body relating to your death, and whatever else the universe decides.

The Smiling God is alive and well, fuck you.

Vanessa and Kevin used to love to sing together. It was their favorite thing to do. They’d have karaoke nights, dance, the whole works. They were really close friends.

Kevin has a ridiculous amount of semi useless skills. Tap dancing, piano playing, shark taming, this mans got it all. For some reason.

CARLOS!!! STIMS!!!!!!!! WHILE HE TALKS, WHILE HES WORKIN THIS MAN IS ALWAYS MOVING

I have adhd authority [bonks Kevin on the head with the adhd wand] you sir now verbally stim by humming and narrating what you’re doing like a broadcast

Strex Kevin did not look human in the slightest. I mean Kevin isn’t human but strex Kevin? Hoo boy he was 80% wounds and blood

Lauren.. big knife hand... hold mine.. protect me....

Kevin used to swear all the time pre strex

Cecil, too, has adhd but he wasn’t really treated for it for a long time so he’s kinda. yknow Like That

AUGH Kevin has super long sharp nails and yes he does paint them gold very carefully

Leonard was cecils father figure when he interned fuck you that’s exactly what happened

There is hope for Lauren there is hope for Lauren there is hope for Lauren there is h

there’s so much more but that’s off the top of my head! @the-void-and-the-valley in case ur interested:}

[smallblueandloud]

hi essbie!! you seem super awesome❤️❤️ if you would like to talk to me about the west wing i would love that! i’m watching for the first time now and i’m in LOVE with it- tell me all your thoughts! otps, favorite episodes, arcs, characters... anything!

oh my god, this is my FAVORITE ASK THAT I HAVE EVER RECEIVED EVER. i’m so happy to talk about the west wing because the fandom that’s still alive today seems to be TINY (although high-spirited!!). thank you for asking!! i will endeavor to talk a lot.... which isn’t hard for me, lol.

(psst, before we begin, can i recommend you check out @donnajosh, who posts gorgeous new gifsets of tww pretty regularly [and also has gifs tagged by episode so you can find the right post to reblog when you’re liveblogging, shh], @etraytin, who’s written some AMAZING multichaps that have gotten me through this very stressful week, and @cassiesinsanity, who’s just plain genuinely amazing?? okay. now that that’s out of the way.)

i tried to figure out from your blog where you are in the show, but i can’t find anything more detailed than “probably has finished in the shadow of two gunmen”, so i’m just gonna keep things anti-spoilers. there are some really, really cool plot developments in tww, and i don’t recommend you spoil yourself for things on purpose! but also like. i DEFINITELY spoil things for myself all the time. so what the hell, don’t listen to me lol.

(i tried to put this under a cut, but tumblr glitched. sorry, peeps who don’t care about the west wing. also, WATCH THE WEST WING.)

my ALL TIME, dearest headcanon is adhd josh. i just. i love my boy so much. i love my impulsive, ridiculously-sensitive-to-perceived-rejection, loud, hyperfixated boy so much. i don’t know everything about adhd, but from what i know josh is TEXTBOOK. or at least he’s a lot like me! and i’m reasonably sure i have adhd. so. i’m REALLY, REALLY into that headcanon and everything about it. (i actually wrote a fic in which i wrote him the way i see his adhd presenting, because i love him so much. hmm, i should write a fic about josh being adhd. what kind of stims would josh like??)

i love and adore josh/donna, like many many other people. i like zoey/charlie, just because i think they make each other happy and both of them deserve that. i... like cj/danny? sorta? i think they’re adorable, and they have some REALLY good moments (no spoilers but. oh my god. danny really out here chugging his respect women juice and i love him for it). but also i am EXTREMELY ATTACHED to cj/toby and more specifically cj/toby/andy.

HEAR ME OUT. cj has EXTREME wlw energy and cj and toby have A LOT of married energy but then toby and andy... love each other so much, it’s so clear, in literally everything they do, i don’t know if you’ve gotten to the end of s5 yet but i cry. so like?? obviously, because i am who i am, polyamory is the answer! basically the rundown is: andy and toby are a typical couple except that they fight a lot. cj is kinda in the middle. if gay marriage had been legal / socially acceptable in the 80s (because god knows this ot3 has been thinking about optics since they graduated college), cj and andy would’ve gotten married and toby would’ve come and gone depending on who he’d pissed off recently, and everything would’ve been perfect. instead, andy and toby got married and it didn’t work because they really just couldn’t function as a unit, especially since their getting married meant that cj isolated herself a bit more. definitely cj and toby have a couple of SCREAMING arguments about the whole relationship. idk.

but just like. imagine with me, if you will, cj and toby... not dating, while working in the white house, but being exes. friendly exes. friendly exes who are still in love with each other and know it. please imagine that and then think about “i love you desperately / i know” and “you wanna make out with me right now, don’t you? / well, when don’t i?” and “we had it good there for a while / yeah, we did” and then join me in the pit of sadness.

(sidenote i have a sense8 au for the west wing and the second story is just me being emotional about their cluster for 5k. i have another story vaguely planned that i’ll probably never write about the development of the ot3 and about their cluster and how it functions. but don’t read that story until you finish... the first half of s7? or thereabouts? actually probably you should finish the show before you read the sense8 au in general if you’re avoiding spoilers.)

(when i say “i’ll probably never write”, i mean “until the next time i get obsessed with the west wing”. which will probably be years from now. oh, well, we can all hope the muse actually does something efficient for once.)

so yeah. those are my ships. i know a lot of people shipped josh/sam, but i don’t really see it? sam always seemed Way Too Straight for that to work lol, although i DO like the idea of sam pining tragically for josh for years just like donna does. (can you tell i read such a winter’s day a few days ago? it’s amazing. i haven’t left a review yet because i have not been a human being recently, but go read it!! it’s awesome!!)

also, i love the idea of bartlet/abbey/leo, although i can’t really visualize it lol. but there’s some amazing fic for them out there. maybe one day my stupid brain will realize the angst potential and actually let me write something for them, hopefully within the sense8 au. (sam also has a cluster! and i would love to write about them! .....but my brain doesn’t do what i tell it to. ever.)

my favorite arc.... i don’t know. i really loved the early seasons, which were a little more episodic, but ALSO i actually really liked the tone after aaron sorkin left after s4? it takes some getting used to, but it’s WAY more emotional, and i am ALL HERE FOR THAT. i definitely have a least favoite arc, or at least a least-favorite way-that-they-handled-a-storyline (spoiler alert: i hated how they handled the end of bartlet’s presidency in the white house. like. SHE’S ALL ALONE IN THERE- anyways. trying not to give detailed spoilers!)

favorite episodes: hmm. i love the thanksgiving episodes. i loved any episode with the ainsley-and-sam dynamic. noel is a phenomenal episode. 26 could make anyone weep. the flashbacks are the best. the fucking- the fucking what’s next motif.

honestly, probably i’d have to say my favorite episode is either 4x20 (evidence of things not seen, for “stupidly noble cluster” reasons and cj/toby reasons and bartlet & charlie reasons. also i feel like there’s some good josh/donna there too but i can’t remember exactly?) or 7x21 (institutional memory, because i’m pretty sure the writers reached into my id and pulled out EXACTLY what i needed from them to be okay with the show ending. jesus CHRIST i have never felt so satisfied after an episode. literally everything i ever could have wanted happened in that episode. i’m STILL reeling. it’s a perfect episode.)

my favorite characters are... literally everyone? i know that’s cheating but i love them all SO MUCH (except mandy and amy, of course). josh is my favorite, always and forever, but i love cj more than words and sometimes i can’t breathe for love of toby. leo and bartlet and charlie and sam and donna- here i was thinking i was gonna resent will forever but i LOVE will. ainsley is an amazing woman. abbey is such a good character, god, talk about a flawed woman who’s allowed to be a good person.

AND THEN THEY MADE ME ROOT FOR A REPUBLICAN. again, i doubt you’ve gotten to s7, but the republican nominee in the last election... jesus christ. i love that man so much. arguably, i’m very biased, but also how D A R E they expect me to root against him. how DARE.

(i swear this will make more sense once you meet him. i just love the actor a lot, okay?)

anyways. this got ridiculously long. i would LOVE to talk about the west wing with you, feel free to reblog this with your own thoughts or tag me in your own post or message me or something. i would love to hear your reactions!! it’s such a good show, and such a smart show, and every character is so mcfreaking good at what they do and i adore it. enjoy the ride because there’s nothing as perfect and as quality as the west wing. if you’ll please excuse me, i’m going to go cry about 7x21 again.

[kissingarthurclaus]

All emotional ask with BeeJ~

Guess I’m doing all of them then!! :D Thank you so much, and thanks everyone else who sent emojis, @space-sweetheart, @ruby-flame, @nomournerzz , @the-storyteller-and-her-soldiers and @spectrumselfshipping! 💚 ily all so much!! 

😨 How does your f/o act when they’re scared? Do they cower behind you or act even more bold? Beej doesn’t get scared of things in the normal sense, he’s a demon who actively enjoys scaring the wits out of people. I think what would scare him the most would be going back to being invisible/alone, especially now that he knows that it feels like to be wanted and loved and supported. He knows that I love him too much to ever send him away again, but sometimes anxiety is really loud and when he gets really upset he likes to hold onto me and squeeze me a little too tight and nuzzle me a little too hard. I’ll run my hands through his hair and whisper soothing things to him until he feels better! 

😰 Alternatively, how do they act when you’re scared? Ok this is especially relevant now after what happened last night, but on the flipside Beej becomes livid and fiercely protective when I’m scared or threatened! I’d like to see someone try to keep their composure when faced with a fiery-haired pissed off demon!😘 How does your f/o flirt? Beetlejuice’s default state is flirting, and it’s not always super effective! It’s mostly really bad puns and poorly disguised innuendos, and no he does not stop flirting for even a moment after we’re officially together. He loves when I blush or scoff at him when he makes a particularly bad joke, and sometimes I react to it by kissing him because he’s an idiot but he’s my idiot.

😍 How well do they react to flirting or affection? Are they easily flustered? *rubs me widdle hands together* so more than a few times I’ve discussed this with friends (cried about it is more accurate but w/e) but he definitely can’t take what he dishes out! He’s used to being the one making advances and even more used to them being rebuffed, but when I react positively to them, or even more when I flirt back or give him affection he just completely forgets how to function!! Suddenly he’s at a loss for words and he’s the one blushing like crazy!

😭 How do they cheer you up when you’re sad? And vice versa? Beej will stop at nothing to see me smile again when I’m feeling down, there’s no lengths he wouldn’t go to, no joke too cheesy, he will not stop until he gets a laugh out of me! Actually, when I was first started listening to the album irl and I wasn’t sure whether I was feeling platonic or romantic for him, the thought of him trying to cheer me up was really what made me fall for him! 💚 When he gets sad I like to lay the praise and physical affection on even more than usual, I tell him that he’s the biggest baddest handsomest demon there ever was and that I could never love anyone more than I love him all the while peppering his face in kisses!! 

😡 What are your f/os pet peeves? I wouldn’t call it a pet peeve per se but I hc that Beej can’t stand people who drink or smoke! It’s a whole thing, reminds him too much of his mom. :(

🤒 Oh no! You’re sick - how does your f/o take care of you? Are they good at it? I feel like he would try his best but ultimately he’s not very good at the ‘taking care of’ bits. The dead don’t get sick so he doesn’t have a lot of experience with it outside of what he’s seen in movies or tv shows, and his soup ended up being completely inedible so I inform him that the best way to recover from being sick is some good rest. Since he’s not in danger of getting sick himself he’s happy to just hold me and let me snuggle up to him (he makes a very effective cooling pad for fevers) and though he’s still a bit noisy he eventually just watches me sleep and makes sure nothing gets in the way of my rest except for him! 

🤧 How do you take care of them when they’re sick? I actually never considered this before now so it was really fun to think about!! After we get married and he’s getting used to being alive, he also has to get used to things a living body does, like get sick. He’s soooo dramatic about it too, he would be whining and moaning about how he thinks he’s dying again, and I have to remind him that it’s only a cold and will clear up in a day or too. I make sure he rests enough, though it’s a chore and I basically have to knock him out with cold medicine at some point, but he loves being doted on! 

😔 What do you and your f/o like to do when you’re bored? I mean,, among other things, we like to browse the internet for funny tiktok compilations and complain about the ones that are bad, and on multiple occasions he’s had me film him doing something stupid in hopes of also getting tiktok famous. So far it hasn’t happened but he’s holding out hope! He likes to watch me draw or try to cook together, and after we’re married we try to make time to experience something new as often as possible, especially since almost everything would be new for him! 

😂 What is your f/os sense of humor? How do they feel about puns? It’s NONSTOP jokes with him, especially puns, and really morbid ones most of the time afhsflal. I really like his sense of humor though, and he always keeps me laughing! 

😴 How cuddly is your f/o when they’re asleep? He is the biggest cuddler ever!! He isn’t happy unless he has an arm or three around me, he just wants me as close as possible and to be able to nuzzle into my neck and smell my hair. It soothes him to the point of being able to sleep, and he likes to be cuddled in bed too! He’s not scared to be the little spoon and loves when I shower him with the same kind of affection!! 

👿 Does your f/o get nightmares? How do you help them with it? Once in a while! They’re mostly about the one thing that scares him, again, being invisible. When that happens I go about comforting him the same way as when he’s having anxiety about it, squeezing him tight and kissing him and reminding him that he’s not going anywhere. That I love him and want him around! 

😤 What is your f/o passionate about? Lots of things! Being the ghost with the most, loving his new family, being super handsome and sexy being a few of them. 

😶 How good is your f/o at keeping secrets (such as a surprise party)? He couldn’t keep a secret to save his life! He just gets way too excited and careless with his words and always manages to let it slip. Only when it’s something fun and frivolous, though, because he’s not really thinking about it. If it’s something more serious then he’s much better at keeping it secret.

😊 What makes your f/o happy? Aside from screams of terror or bad horror movies, being made to feel like he’s wanted! He’s spent so long longing to be seen and heard, all he’s ever wanted was to be included and feel like he’s allowed to take up space and that people want him around. I want to make him feel that way and I wanna make sure he never feels unseen again! 

Bonus for my autistic/ADHD folks - 😝 How does your f/o engage with you and your special interest/fixation? Do they help you infodump, learn as much as they can about your interests? Do they buy or make you things related to them? Ok literally tho my favorite thing ever is when ppl hc Beej as being autistic because I am too!! and I love the idea of him listening to me infodump about things I like or the way I talk about little fun facts I know, just him listening makes me really happy! and when he gets super excited he kinda stims through it and I like the idea of happy stimming with him and just relishing in the feeling ajhkfa,,