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the-fiction-will-knit-the-real · 2 years ago

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I love hearing about people's experiences figuring themselves out. Thank you for sharing.

TW: Catholicism, queerphobia, depression

I grew up in a strictly Catholic household, went to Catholic school through 8th grade. The only concept of sexuality and gender I had was straight and cis people. I think I heard about the concept of being gay one time in late high school, and it was in the context of friends saying "hate the sin, not the sinner."

In college, I gravitated towards people who were queer in some way, but I didn't understand why. These people also didn't seem to feel safe coming out to me for years, either, and that hurt, but I did not understand at the time how much my upbringing still affected my worldview and the things I would say. I still even identified as Catholic until I was 24, a few years into grad school.

I learned of the concept of asexuality late in college, and immediately knew that I fit on that spectrum. While I am still a very "hopeless romantic" type who wants to find "their person" eventually, I'm very ambivalent towards sex. I'll have it or not depending on the preference of the person I'm with. Unfortunately being ace led me to judge people when I was younger, when everyone around me was condemning premarital sex and that felt fine to me because if I didn't feel any interest in having sex, surely it can't be too difficult for other people to abstain.

I didn't realize trans people existed until I was 21 and met a trans man, and didn't meet another trans person until I was 25, when I was in an inpatient unit for depression. This second person absolutely changed my life. They showed me that it's okay to not fit into a particular gender box, that being genderqueer not only existed but could be a life I could have. It took me less than a year to come out publicly and change my name/pronouns.

I am happy with who I am for the first time, possibly ever. And yet I still feel that guilt for not getting it earlier, for saying and believing queerphobic shit for years just because I never met any queer people to challenge me.

I don't necessarily know the best way forward for me to get rid of this guilt, but I am doing my best now to be out, publicly, among my [still heavily Catholic] family and community, in the hopes that I can be the queer person I never met, in the hopes that just knowing a queer person can change people's views, as it did mine.

You are valid as you are. Not everyone will understand that, but you better believe it.

Growing up, I loved being a girl. I loved dresses and skirts and the plastic high-heels and wearing mums makeup and wearing nail polish. I loved being a little princess and being a little girl.

When I was 12, I met my best friend. They then identified as a trans boy. They introduced me to the idea of being queer.

I came out as bi shortly after, thinking I had a crush on them. My parents were incredibly supportive and even supported looking further into my sexuality and my coming out as a lesbian.

But my friend also introduced me to the idea of being trans. I was 12 when I was looking into a mirror and deciding I hated my breasts. I didn’t know what to feel. I was scared of being a boy and everything that came with it. I decided I was nonbinary.

The four years following involved me exploring my sexuality and gender. Bi, pan, lesbian, aromantic. Nonbinary, demigirl, demigender, genderfluid, genderqueer. Never truly accepting that I could be a boy.

It hit me in the middle of a dream. My brother called me his brother and I had this “oh” moment. Oh, I’m a trans man. Not transmasc, not sometimes a boy. A trans man. And as a trans man, the lesbian label no longer made me comfortable. I looked deep into myself and found myself unable to authentically see myself dating a man or a woman. Aroace.

I’m an aroace trans man.

It’s taken four years of confusion, name changes and experimentation to come to this conclusion. For some it can be a couple of months. For some it can be years longer. Some people never figure it out.

No matter how long it takes you to come to terms with your identity, you are valid. It doesn’t matter if you keep changing your name every couple of weeks or months, I know I did, and I still might. It doesn’t matter if you change your label every day. It doesn’t matter if you never label yourself.

You are valid. Your experience is valid. Your identity is valid.

I see you. And I love you.

#tw catholicism #tw depression #tw queerphobia #personal growth #you are valid #greysexual #genderqueer

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denialcity · 2 years ago

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Any more thoughts about your OC brothers of Madara? From whom is Sasuke and Itachi descended from?

Sorry about the delay Anon! As it happens we have SO MANY thoughts about the brothers

Since Sasuke and Itachi exist in canon though they've got to be descended from either Madara or Izuna, since we have the OC brothers dying too young to have kids. Which would mean that in (the future of) ELAU, Itachi and Sasuke will end up just random Uchiha (though powerful, and possibly with the rinnegan) and not part of the head family. So Itachi at least will probably be much happier growing up with less pressure on him. (And, you know, no massacre so Sasuke will be happier too.)

As for the brothers! (warning Kunimi’s story includes a su*cide attempt)

Takami and Meguru:

They're a unit. You can't separate them; they don't function well at all without the other, and any opinion/decision/etc you get from one has for sure been discussed with and approved by the other.

Takami is a fantastic singer, one of the best in the Uchiha clan (and an 'average' Uchiha is already amazing by any other standards). People will stop what they're doing to linger nearby and listen to him (and then try to hurry away before he can notice them)

Meguru is also a very good singer, but he doesn't like to sing where anyone except Takami, sometimes the rest of his brothers, and eventually Kawarama can hear

Takami becomes the second Hokage, with Tobirama as his "assistant" aka mostly-secret co-Hokage. (Hashirama was the first Hokage, with Madara as his assistant/co-kage.)

Takami's and Tobirama's working relationship is a lot more... explosive than HashiMada were, but they're also terrifyingly effective, and sincerely dedicated to the long-term good of their people. Konoha was already a political power because the Senju and Uchiha both were, but Takami and Tobirama ensure that Konoha will remain one of the top political powers in Fire Country (and the continent) long term

They also have backup plans for conquering any or all of the rest of the continent, should said rest of the continent cause enough problems to make war worth it. This hasn't happened (yet)

Meguru (and Kawarama) takes over more of the work running the Uchiha clan while Takami is Hokage, although Takami still does as much as he can

Takami retires from the Hokage position about when his first grandkid is born, because he wants to spend time with them (and his kids, most of whom are fondly exasperated about their dad having more time to follow them around nagging about grandbabies and eating healthy)

We haven't named any of the next generation, but we call the oldest TakaKawa kid Princess. This is because as a kid she realized that some of her cousins (the HashiMito kids) were called princesses, and complained to Takami that she wanted to be a princess too

Takami's response to this was to immediately start researching which small nation would be best for him to conquer in order to make his daughters actual princesses. Luckily for all nearby small nations, Princess was appeased by everyone agreeing to just call her a princess

Meguru and Kawarama got back together in part because Takami resorted to literally locking them in a room together to make them talk. He then tried to anxiously listen through the door because what if it doesn't work and Meguru gets hurt again?

This has been mentioned before but it's worth bringing up again that Meguru's first boyfriend had a fairly similar personality to Takami, especially in the way of being an arrogant asshole. Meguru didn't mind until the guy started causing problems and expecting Meguru to fix things and get him out of trouble, at which point Meguru dumped the guy and began dating the guy's uncle (the golden retriever blacksmith)

Takami and Meguru trade memories of Kawarama, although most of these are just alternate POVs on things they both saw

In a soulmate AU (assuming soulmates aren't necessarily romantic/sexual), Meguru and Kawarama are both Takami's soulmates, but not each other's. They just end up loving each other anyway without destiny

In an ELAU/BSAU fusion, TakaKawa's fourth kid (the first one born after Takami's Realization that he loves his kids) is albino aka a Blessed Sacrifice. He is delighted to have one kid that he can dote on as much as he wants and will never have to send on a mission. She grows up even more thoroughly spoiled than her sisters but still sweet, and spends a lot of time benevolently bestowing her attention on other Uchiha. The Uchiha are honored and everyone else is very confused

Kunimi:

Kunimi's goal/dream was always to be a shinobi. That's what main house kids DO, nobody ever considers any alternative

Except there's absolutely no way that Kunimi can be a shinobi when he can't stay awake or keep himself from knocking out his own clanmates. So he has to be a civilian even though main house kids are only supposed to retire when they marry (women, to have kids) or if they're unlucky enough to be injured in a way that prevents them from fighting (and they survive said injury)

Kunimi sort of technically fits that second category, since his nightmare hell mangekyou developed when he was protecting Izuna from bloodline thieves that kidnapped them both. This does not make him feel better

Since he can't fight, Kunimi apprentices to one of the Uchiha's master coatmakers, which means he learns to make and repair the special armor that all Uchiha shinobi wear for battle. This is slightly traumatizing for the coatmaker teaching him, because hanging around Kunimi means regularly getting unexpectedly stuck in nightmare hell. But Meguru specifically requested that the coatmaker teach Kunimi, and no Uchiha willingly turns down a request from Meguru, and since they're in the compound they're both safe

When he's not learning coatmaking or stuck in nightmare hell, Kunimi spends a lot of time gardening or raising chickens. Initially he grew whatever plants were easiest and available, but once he's more experienced he starts growing mostly spices. Spices are more expensive and it's much more feasible for him to grow a significant portion of the spices the Uchiha use, so it's a better contribution to the clan finances. He also likes the idea of other Uchiha using the spices he grew in their meals and thinking about him, because it makes him feel less isolated

Once Kunimi has learned some basics of working with fabric, he and Izuna team up to make a fan as a gift for Meguru: Izuna does the forging/metal blades, and Kunimi does the silk and painting. It's like, decent quality, not fantastic, but Meguru loves it and likes to bring it with him to events and show it off to whoever he's just met

Kunimi and Izuna both find this very embarrassing, especially once they've had some more years to gain skill and Meguru still carries around and shows off their first attempt. They've made more fans for him! Much better fans! Why are you still showing off their middle school art project, Hako-nii PLEASE--

Meguru will not be stopped, so the twins just have to live with eternal mild embarrassment every time Meguru meets someone new that he can show the fan to

Kunimi's goal is to make all of the fancy clothes that are also weapons which Meguru likes to wear. By the time Konoha happens he's provided a significant part of Meguru's wardrobe (and a few things of Izuna's and Madara's too) though not all of it

The Senju get ahold of Kunimi, who attempts suicide while he's a prisoner, both out of Uchiha pride and to prevent the Senju from using him against the Uchiha. Itama finds him and keeps him alive while yelling for Hashirama, who is able to heal him fully

Meguru, Madara, and Izuna are horrified when they learn about this (and fully ignoring the fact that Meguru and Izuna would both have done the same thing). Takami's response is something along the lines of 'good decision, that was the proper shinobi thing to do, but you're back now so don't do it again.' Kunimi kind of appreciates Takami's reaction but is also very bitter about never getting to be a real shinobi

Meguru on the other hand is furious with Takami for it. It's one of the very few real disagreements they ever have

Takami would have ransomed Kunimi back from the Senju anyway purely because Meguru would have been sad if he didn't, and the Uchiha wouldn't have resented him for it (also because Meguru would be sad if he didn't) but Kunimi being a coatmaker would have been more than enough justification even if Meguru hadn't cared

Meguru, Madara, and Izuna insist on Kunimi living inside the compound once he's been ransomed back, and everyone else can just cope with the nightmare hell when necessary, lest Kunimi be kidnapped again

Kunimi has extremely complicated feelings about this, and also about peace in general, the medicine Tobirama makes for him, and prettymuch everything that happens as a result of him being kidnapped and ransomed back

Kunimi is very bitter and angry and emo when Konoha is established. Meguru, Madara, and Izuna are the only Uchiha that actively want to spend time with him, and they're all fairly busy, so he's still pretty isolated. He hates Itama for kidnapping him but he doesn't like anyone other than his brothers. He puts up with Itama's initial attempts to befriend him mostly because Kunimi is extremely bored, and Itama is weird therefore interesting

By "Itama is weird" Kunimi means "Itama is not actively trying to avoid me"

Most Senju have a large collection of plants, so when Kunimi starts to like Itama, he initially expresses this by going out into the forest, picking a plant he likes, digging it up, and leaving it (without a pot, just roots and dirt) on Itama's windowsill when Itama is away, so that Kunimi won't have to (horror) say things like 'I like you' or 'here have a gift.' A lot of the plants he chooses are variegated

He then gets very mad when he learns that the plants Senju keep usually produce very potent medicines, sometimes produce poisons, and the remainder are excellent herbs and spices. Itama then takes him through every plant Itama owns and lists when/how/why he got them and who from, which is mostly stories like 'this is the first cutting from a plant Hashirama bred' and 'Kawarama brought this one back from Wind Country (I kept almost killing it before we figured out that it hates both water and decent soil)' and 'Tobirama gave me this for successfully completing my first solo mission'

This takes significantly longer than Kunimi would have liked, but he does get the 'I like these because of who gave them to me and why, not because they're useful' message

A handful of years after Konoha was founded, Kunimi's medicine has been refined enough that he hasn't (unintentionally) fallen asleep in a few years, and Tobirama has stopped making constant tweaks and 'yes that works fine but I had a new idea that might work BETTER' adjustments. Kunimi therefore goes to ask Takami if he can go on a mission and (finally) be a real shinobi

Takami says no

Kunimi has Prepared Arguments. He's been training for this all his life. He hasn't fallen asleep accidentally in years. He can take a month's supply of medicine on a two-day mission. He can go on the easiest mission available and go with an experienced shinobi and--

Takami asks him how many shinobi the Uchiha clan has. Kunimi isn't sure

The Uchiha have just over 200 active shinobi. Konoha, in total, probably has over 3000 shinobi by this point

In contrast, the Uchiha have five coatmakers, and that's only if Takami counts the apprentice who started last year

There is no mission Kunimi could ever possibly go on that would be more valuable than the battle coats he could make or repair in the same time. Therefore, Kunimi is never going to go on a mission and never going to be a shinobi

Now go cling to Itama or something but get out of Takami's office, he has work to do

Itama finds Kunimi lying in a pile of shredded fabric and Having Emotions. It takes Kunimi a long time to process this, and he's never happy about not being a shinobi, but he does eventually end up emotionally steadier about himself and his life

In an ELAU/BSAU fusion, Kunimi goes to live in the Spring House. He's not a yomotsu-shikome, his job is to take care of the house (+ shrine, grounds, etc) but it keeps him both safe and out of the Uchiha compound. His family visits regularly, and he starts keeping chickens, so by the time Izuna becomes yomotsu-shikome it's a much less isolating place. (They still aren't allowed to talk to each other, but Izuna can talk to himself or the crows while Kunimi talks to the chickens, and they can work together, hug, etc.)

#Itama was not prepared for the concept of An Cactus #a literal cactus that is #prickly spiky I-need-nothing-and-no-one Kunimi he can handle #plant that doesn't want water? Itama is lost #tw suicide attempt #replies from the city council #everybody lives au #im lazy to tag everybody #will do it when my personal desktop blocker runs out

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hamliet · 4 years ago

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The Girl Who Gets to Have It All: Buffy Summers

So with @linkspooky‘s encouragement, I have binged Buffy the Vampire Slayer and relived my childhood culture. And, it's a 10/10 for me. Not that it doesn't have flaws, but it's genuinely one of the best stories I've seen, with consistent character arcs, powerful themes, and a beautiful message. It's also like... purportedly about vampires and demons and superpowered chosen ones, but it's actually all about humanity.

Buffy was able to be a teenage girl, allowed to like the things teen girls are scorned for (boys, shopping, etc), to be insecure about the thing teenage girls are insecure about (future careers, dating, school, parents), and to be a superhero with its good and its bad aspects. The story wasn’t afraid to call Buffy on her flaws (sometimes she got in a very ‘I am the righteous chosen one’ mode) and to respect and honor each of her desires (to be a good person, to be loved, and more). The story listened to what she wanted and respected her desires, giving her the challenges needed to overcome her flaws while also never teaching her a lesson about wanting bad boys or romance is silly or any manner of dark warnings stories like to throw at teenage girls.

It respected teenage girls--nerdy girls like Willow, jocks like Buffy, lonely wallflowers with trauma like Dawn, and popular/snobby ones like Cordelia, girls gone wild like Faith. It never once reduced them to the stereotypes that were lurking right there: each character was fully rounded, human, flawed and yet with respected interests and goals. This is so rare for a story that I’m still in awe.

The story as a whole follows Buffy from 15 to 21, of her as she grows from teenager to adult. She acts like a teenager and grows to act like a young adult, wrestling with loneliness and duty. The adults, like Giles, Joyce, and Jenny, are not perfect either, but neither are they “bad parents” or “bad mentors” necessarily. Joyce in particular says something terrible to Buffy, but she tries to do better, and it’s rare to see a parent in YA stories shown with such nuance. Basically, it wrote the long-lasting adult characters as human beings, too.

Speaking of growing up, I appreciated how Buffy’s love interests mirrored this. Angel was someone Buffy loved and admired, wanted to be like, but who was always either extreme good or extreme bad, and combined with Buffy’s own tendencies towards black-white thinking, made for a beautiful relationship to help her grow, but didn’t necessarily form a foundation for a long-term partner. Spike, on the other hand... they both saw each other at their worst and were drawn to each other even then, and were inspired to become better because they couldn’t bear to be a person who treated the other person so wrongly. They pushed each other to become the best them they could be, and believed in each other. Also, Spuffy is an enemies to lovers ship for the ages.

(Also, most of the other ships were well-done or at least can be understood. Riley was very obviously wrong for Buffy which paralleled Harmony and Spike in being 100% wrong for each other. Cordelia and Xander were a fun ship even if we all knew it would never last, and Willow and Oz were beautiful and cute. But Xander and Anya and Willow and Tara? OTPs. As were Giles and Jenny, the librarian and the computer teacher.)

That said, it’s not a perfect series. No story is. All of the characters and ships had problematic aspects to them worthy of critique, and the writing is very 90s in a lot of ways. It’s a product of its time, and in many ways it’s good society has progressed beyond some of the tropes/metaphors used in the show. In other way, though, the show was ahead of its time, and in a good way it wasn’t bound by the fear of purity policing with its takes on redemption (many characters would never fly today).

So, in order of seasons ranked from my very favorite to my “still enjoyed it very much” (no season was actually bad, imo), here’s my review. I’ll also review my top 10 villains in the show, because Buffy does villains very well in terms of the redeemable and irredeemable.

Season 7: Yep, the final season was my favorite.

Overall Opinion: Buffy's finale is literally "f*ck them men, our power is ours" and while it seems cheesy it actually works (also, f*ck in both a literal and figurative sense). The series strongly hit all the themes: love as strength, and redemption. Buffy consistently shows love as her strength--*all* kinds of love. Friendship w Willow/Xander, familial with Joyce/Dawn, romantic with Spike/Angel. These types of love are also never pitted against each other as is so often the case in current-day media. It's beautiful. Also, Spike’s confrontation with Wood was so powerful in terms of exploring forgiveness, redemption, and reconciliation: where they overlap and where they don't, and what it means to move forward.

Unpopular Opinion: I have seen a lot didn’t like the inclusion of Potential Slayers, and while I agree they could have been better incorporated/characterized, it was a great way to show Buffy’s final stage of growing up to be ending her chosen one status and projecting/multiplying her powers over the world.

Biggest Critique: Kennedy was female Riley--the anti-Tara to Riley’s anti-Angel (by ‘anti’ I mean opposite in every way). Kennedy was annoying and immature. Her role, like Riley’s, was less about exploring her as a character and more about her just being stamped as “love interest: lesbian.”

Favorite Episodes: Beneath You, Lies My Parents Told Me, Touched, Chosen

Season 6:

Overall Opinion: I said this on Twitter, but I felt like this was Buffy’s The Last Jedi or Empire Strikes Back moment. It is polarizing and dark, deconstructing the tropes it stands on--but by digging to the core of these tropes, it actually makes what’s good about them shine brighter. Everyone’s enemy was the worst versions of themselves. Giles left Buffy, Willow's struggle to relate to the world led to her trying to destroy it, Buffy hurt everyone through her anger, Xander abandoned Anya at the altar, Spike... yeah. It ages well as an integral part of the story, and the Trio were eerily prophetic.

Unpopular Opinion: Dawn is a great character with a good arc. A traumatized teen acting out and struggling to come to terms with loss and identity? She wasn’t whiny; she was realistic.

Biggest Critique: Willow’s addiction coding (I’ll discuss this below) and Seeing Red as an episode. I see the argument for both of its controversial scenes from a narrative perspective: Willow starts the season not grieving Buffy but instead being determined to fix it with magic and needs to learn to grieve, but. Still. Bury your gays is not a good look. For the Spike scene... he conflates sex/passion and violence (”love is blood, children” is something he said way back in season 3), but like Tara’s death, it had more to do with Spike (as Tara’s death did for Willow) than with Buffy’s arc, and as for the actual execution... they really botched that. Did it like... have to go on that long or go that far? No. Also, the framing was good, but inconsistent with the rest of the series (Xander to Buffy in the hyena episode, Faith to Xander and to Riley, etc.)

Favorite Episodes: Once More With Feeling, Smashed, Grave

Season 3 (tied with Season 5):

Overall Opinion: The opening continuity of Buffy meeting Lily/Anne after saving her life in Season 2 was sweet. The Witchhunt episode had really powerful subtext: stories of deaths that aren’t even true are actually demons that possess the town and convince them to turn against their children in the name of protecting the children. It’s a good commentary on, oh, everything in society. Faith’s character arc was fantastic, and her chemistry with Buffy was off the charts (look, I may be Spuffy all the way, but Fuffy has rights). The finale was satisfying in so many ways, seeing the entire graduating class unite to destroy the Mayor and the school with it, symbolizing Buffy et al’s readiness to move on to college. Oz's relationship with Willow was very sweet and meaningful for a first romance for Willow.

Unpopular Opinion: I actually don’t really have one. Maybe that the miracle in Amends was earned? I think you can make a decent case that Season 3 is the best written of the seasons, but can only truly be thematically appreciated to its full potential in the light of subsequent seasons (which finish Faith’s arc and deconstruct Buffy’s).

Biggest Critique: It forgot Buffy killed the hyena guy in Season 1, making her continual insistence that she can’t kill people very ?????

Favorite Episodes: Lovers Walk, Amends, Graduation Day Part 2

Season 5, which ties with Season 3:

Overall Opinion: The entire season is about family and what it means, from Tara’s to Buffy’s to the Scoobies. I loved Glory aka Enoshima Junko as the Big Bad, I loved Dawn’s interesting meta commentary on retconning (like, the fact that she’s retconned in matters), and most of my ships are still alive. Joyce’s relationship with Spike is one of the most heartwarming aspects, and Spike’s arc’s desire is clearly highlighted: he wants to be seen as a person. The episodes after Joyce’s death are the most honest portrayals of grief I’ve ever seen, and absolutely brutal to watch.

Unpopular Opinion: Buffy’s choice at the end seems a deliberate inversion of her choice at the end of Season 2 (sacrifice a loved one to save the world), but it actually isn’t: much like at the end of Season 2 where Buffy skips town because she’s devastated after killing Angel and doesn’t want to sort out being expelled, her mom knowing she’s the slayer, and her own trauma, Buffy’s sacrifice here was as much about her wanting the easy way out of relationships, family, college, etc. as it was about saving Dawn. Buffy’s death is coded as a suicide, which Season 6 emphasizes as well.

Biggest Critique: Like Season 3, I don’t have a lot to critique here. I wish the suicidal coding had been a little more obvious in Season 5 itself, but also I’m not sure it could have been more obvious; it’s pretty apparent if you pay attention. Maybe also that Buffy and Riley’s relationship failing should have been more squarely blamed on Riley, you know, being insecure and cheating.

Favorite Episodes: Family, Fool for Love, Intervention.

Season 2:

Overall Opinion: Heartbreakingly tragic but exciting and revealing at the same time. It asked the viewer interesting questions about redemption and forgiveness and atonement through Angel being honest about his past, and then decided to show us his past now reenacted, challenging us. And still, we saw them save him in a parallel to saving Willow in Season 6 (but Season 2 was tragic because it wasn’t enough, while Season 6 was not). Jenny’s death was agonizing, and the scene were Angel watches Buffy, Willow, and Joyce get the news through the window was powerful. We didn’t have to hear them to get the grief.

Unpopular Opinion: Jenny’s death isn’t a fridging; it works for her arc too when you consider her history. She worked to save the person whose life she was tasked to ruin, and it cost her her own--yet she still succeeded, because Jenny brought joy and wisdom to the show. Kendra’s death, on the other hand... was because they needed the stakes to be high--but we already knew that before she died. So, her death was useless.

Biggest Critique: The subtext was Not It. It was essentially “do not have sex. Your older boyfriend will lose his soul, kill your friends, you’ll lose your family, your school, your home, and have to kill your true love or else hell will literally swallow earth.”

Favorite Episodes: School Hard, Passion, Becoming Part 2.

Season 1:

Overall Opinion: I really liked it; it’s just lower on this list because the others are just better. It’s a great introduction to the series and to its characters, from Giles to Buffy to Willow to Jenny to Cordelia. It has great subtext a lot of the time (for example, Natalie French as She-Mantis is a literal predatory bug who engages in predatory behavior with students). Additionally, it subverts the typical YA trope of two guys and a girl, in which the girl is usually the least interesting character. Buffy and Willow were both fully fledged characters from the beginning with distinct strengths (even before Willow became a witch, as she wasn’t one in season 1 yet), while Xander was the more ordinary of the group.

Unpopular Opinion/Biggest Critique: Xander’s arc showed its first flaws that unfortunately continued throughout the series: his writing was either very good or very indulgent in ways it never was for other characters. (cough, the hyena episode, cough, in which he gets to skirt responsibility--and acknowledges that he is skirting it--for something the show will later hold others to account for). Xander’s just kind of inconsistent, which weakened his character over all. (Which is why both his love interests--Cordelia and then ultimately Anya--were good for him: they did not indulge him.)

Favorite Episode: Witch, Nightmares.

Season 4:

Overall Opinion: it’s still a good season. It’s a good portrayal of college and the growing pains of branching out, the strains of college growth on relationships (romantic and platonic). It shows us the first hints of Spuffy, giving us some serious Jungian symbolism between Spike and Buffy early on, and does well in establishing Xander/Anya and Willow/Tara as beautiful OTPs. Faith and Buffy’s foiling is fantastic. The Halloween episode was very fun as well. However, it suffers because its Big Bad, Adam, is not all that compelling thematically--yet, he could have been. See, the final battle pulls off the Power of Friendship in a really strong way but notably the season does not end there. Instead, it ends on dreams of each character’s worst fears, continuing what we saw in Nightmares in Season 1. Why? Because it shows us that the characters’ wars aren’t against monsters, but monsters of their own making: their flaws. Adam, as a literal Frankenstein, exemplifies this, but it wasn’t capitalized on as well as it could have been.

Unpopular Opinion: Beer Bad isn’t a bad episode, at the very least because Buffy gets to punch Parker. It’s not one of the series’ best, obviously, but it does give Buffy an arc in that she gets her daydream of Parker begging her to come back, but she has overcome that desire and her desire for revenge. If we wanna talk about bad subtext in Season 4, Season 2′s Not It sex subtext continues in the Where the Wild Things Are episode in this season; it’s a powerful callout of abusive purity-culture churches, until the fact that the shame creates a literal curse undermines the progressive message it’s supposed to send. Also, the Thanksgiving episode (Pangs) is a nightmare of white guilt and Oh God Shut Up White People.

Biggest Critique: Riley is awful. Like Kennedy, he had “love interest:normal” stamped on him and that was it. The thing is, he could have worked as an Angel foil, representative of the normal-life aspect of Buffy to Angel’s vampire/supernatural aspect, but the writers never explore this and seemed to even try to back away from that later on. They threw all the romantic cliches at the wall to see what sticks, from klutzy “I dropped my schoolbooks, that’s how we met” to cliché lines that had me rolling my eyes. Do you know how bad a romance has to be to make me dislike romantic tropes?

Favorite Episodes: Fear Itself, Hush, Restless

Villain rankings:

Dark Willow, the only villain to be truly sympathetic. While the addiction coding was insensitive and, while unsurprising for its time, aged extremely poorly. That said, Willow’s turn to the dark side after Tara’s death worked well for her character and the story: it was believable and paid off what had been building since Season 1's “Nightmares” episode (Willow’s inferiority complex).

Glory managed to be genuinely terrifying, and humorous/enjoyable too. Her minions and their numerous nicknames for Glorificus were hilarious, as was her intense vanity. Her merging with Ben--a human being who genuinely wanted to be kind and good--added complexity and tragedy to her role.

The First. A really good take on Satan. The seventh season as well as the First’s first appearance in season 3′s “Amends” had kind of blatant Christian symbolism, and so the First being essentially Satan works. Their disguising themselves as dead loved ones and the subtle manipulation they used to alienate people was really disturbing and well done.

The Mayor, who was a terrible person but a truly good father. He provided an interesting contrast to the normal ‘bad dad’ bad guy character, in that he provided Faith exactly what the other characters refused to: he saw the best in her and offered her parental support, while the heroes didn’t and wound up pushing her away.

The Trio, who were villains ahead of their time: whiny fanboy reddit dudebros, basically. The stakes seemed so much lower than fighting Glory, a literal god, the previous season. But that’s why they worked so well for Season 6′s human themes, and were especially disturbing because we all know people like them. I also appreciated the surprisingly sensitive takes on Jonathan and Andrew, who got to redeem themselves, but Warren did not, and I don’t think he should have either.

Angelus + Drusilla. I’m ranking them below the Trio because Angelus was just sooooo different from Angel that it was difficult for me to feel the same way for him. He was still Angel, so it wasn’t possible to enjoy his villainy, but he also wasn’t nearly as sympathetic as Dark Willow, had no redeeming qualities like the Mayor, and wasn’t as disturbingly realistic as the Trio. However, the emotional stakes were excellently executed with him as the Big Bad, in that you were never quite sure how to feel and it just plain hurt. Also, Drusilla was a favorite recurring character. She was sympathetic and yet batsh*t enough to be enjoyable as a villain at the same time.

The Master, who was just completely camp and really worked as an introductory villain. He was scary enough to believe he was a threat, and was funny enough to introduce the series’ humor as well. He was, like Glory, an enjoyable Big Bad.

The Gentlemen, the one-off villains of Season 4′s Hush who were genuinely terrifying. It’s not as if they got a lot of explanation or any backstory, but they didn’t need it.

Caleb, the misogynist priest. Fitting with the First’s Christian symbolism, Caleb serving as a spokesperson of all bad religious beliefs felt appropriate. He was also a good foil to Warren--being actually supernaturally powered instead of a wannabe--and to Tara’s family in being full-out evil. I despised him.

Snyder. Okay Snyder is not a Big Bad like Adam is, but let’s face it: Adam is lame compared to the other villains. But Snyder as a principal? He was so irritating and yet really well used in the series to critique overly strict, hypocritical teachers. Like, we all know teachers like him. I loved to hate him, and his ending was so satisfying.

#buffy the vampire slayer #btvs #spuffy #buffy summers #dawn summers #spike #angel #cordelia chase #btvs giles #willow rosenberg #tillow #tara maclay #anya jenkins #xanya #xander harris #jenny calendar #kendra young #faith lehane #hamliet reviews

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chavahlahdraws · 2 years ago

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ok, here are my thoughts now that i’m not sobbing over these recs (real, omfg why) :

sophie and howl stepping out of their bits and quarrels and just loving each other in its purest form is so incredibly comforting that if it could be done in the right balance i would write it into everything i ever wrote about them. Cleaning Lady does this so incredibly in the first chapter that i’m thinking of doing a few little exercises on this topic myself :) i think what kept catching me on writing their wedding and/or their proposal was trying desperately to capture sincerity without it being ooc! (and that’s why although chapter 2 of cleaning lady was so scrumptious i didn’t enjoy it as much as the first)

as for their wedding specifically, i’ve always wanted to explore some of their escapades to wales but didn’t want to force it too much (especially concerning megan) and oh my god @thatfoolsophie your fic exemplified it so perfectly with the mundane details like howl calling her ‘darling’ in the midst of a ridiculous situation — ITS SO PERFECT I CANT EVEN BELIEVE IT

and oh my god, A Certain Sort of Magic was at some points reminding me of my own struggles with writing these two accurately, but GOODNESS was that argument scene so so jarring and real. it is entirely possible for high stress situations to bring out all those emotions and how the author wrote the whole argument, along with the magic and casual spells intertwined throughout it is just so character. it brings me into their romantic relationship more deeply than the book does (because that’s not necessarily it’s focus) but the language makes it so apparently clear that it’s THEM. i am a bit of a stickler for writing large weddings (which is a bit odd considering my nearest and dearest oc marries into a royal family 💀) and i think it’s really hard to balance so many people and characters in one space, so focusing in on our dear pendragons/jenkins does wonders for the story.

all this in mind, i really think we should all unite and write some sort of little master fic of all these ideas😭😭i’d be so down for that

also i’m so sorry but i wouldn’t know if you’ve read my fics either bc im self conscious and i always delete them after a few months so you could have read them but i probably took it down 😭😵‍💫

guys can we start a howl and sophie wedding brainstorming session bc i am patiently waiting for my copy of cita and somewhere in between that and hmc they got married. what was it like?? did he bring her back to wales??? how did he propose??? or how did SHE i guess????? I NEED THE DETAILS RAHHH

WHAT IS THE IDEA HERE GUYS

#thank you so much for the recs lula i can’t even express #a certain sort of magic was so INCREDIBLY BEAUTIFUL #I CANT DO IT #RAHH #if u guys could see my instagram story i was broadcasting my tears😭😭#they are actually the light of my life #PLEASE

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iimpavidwrites · 4 years ago

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Benzaiten Steel and the Fragility of Perception

or: reasons why setting boundaries is important #1283

I’ve figured out a reason why Benzaiten Steel stayed with his mother instead of doing the “sensible” thing and moving out. I think that it’s possible, too, that Juno has always been aware of the answer but, in the scope of Juno Steel and the Monster’s Reflection, he isn’t able to face it head-on because it contradicts his black/white, either/or sense of morality.

TL;DR: Despite Juno Steel’s unreliable narration we are able to see clearly the enmeshed relationship Benzaiten had with their mother Sarah and the ways in which that unhealthy family dynamic shaped Juno Steel as a person.

Sources: 50% speculation, 20% lit crit classes, 30% my psychology degree.

Juno’s perception of Ben is shallow and filtered through the limitations of human memory. We all know by now, too, that Juno’s an Unreliable Narrator™. In light of this, we need to ask ourselves why it is that Juno remembers Ben as happy, supportive, and only ever gentle in the challenges he poses to Juno. Throughout the episode, Ben’s memory is clearly acting as a comforting psychopomp: he ferries Juno through the metaphorical death of his old understanding of his mother (and also himself) and into a new way of thinking. He does this through persistent-but-kind questions, never telling Juno what to do or how to do it. This role could have been played by anyone in Juno’s life (Mick and Rita come to mind first) which makes it telling that Juno’s mind chose Ben to fill this role.

Juno’s version of Ben is cheerful, endlessly patient with Juno and Sarah, and above all he is compassionate. He acts as a mediating presence between Juno and Juno’s memory of Sarah and he doesn’t ask a whole lot for himself. If this is Juno’s strongest memory/impression of Ben’s behavior and perspective, then we can draw some conclusions about the roles they each played in the Steel family unit: Juno was antagonistic to Sarah and vice versa, and Ben was relegated to the role of mediator for the both of them.

Juno: She’s just evil. Ben: That’s a big word. Juno: “Evil”? Ben: No, “Just”.

We can see in this exchange that Ben is a vehicle for the compassion Juno needs to show not only to Sarah but to himself, too, in order to move on and evolve his understanding of his childhood traumas.

This is not necessarily an appropriate role for a sibling or a child to hold in a family unit.

In family psychology, one of the maladaptive relationship patterns that is discussed is enmeshment. Googling the term you’ll find a lot of sensational results (e.g. “emotional incest syndrome”) that aren’t necessarily accurate in describing what this dysfunction looks like in the real world. This is in part because enmeshment can present many different ways. So, in order to proceed with this analysis of Benzaiten Steel’s relationship with his mom, I need to define enmeshment.

Enmeshment occurs when the normal boundaries of a parent-child relationship are dissolved and the parent becomes over-reliant on the child, requiring the child to cater to their emotional needs and to otherwise become a parent to the parent (or to themself and/or to other children in the family). This is easiest to spot when a parent confides in a child as if they’re a best friend, disclosing details of their romantic life, expecting the child to give them advice on coping with work stress, and similar. Once enmeshment occurs, any kind of emotional shift in one member of the enmeshed household will reverberate to the others; self-regulation and discernment (e.g. figuring out which emotions originate in the parent and which ones originate in the child) becomes extremely difficult for the effected child and parent. When an enmeshed child becomes an enmeshed adult they often have issues with self-identity and interpersonal boundaries. For example, they may struggle to define themselves without external validation and expect others to be able to intuitively divine their emotions. After all, the enmeshed adult could do this with their parent and others easily due to hypervigilance cultivated by their parent and they may not understand that such was not the typical childhood experience. These adults are often individuals to whom the advice “don’t set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm” is often relevant and disregarded. They may perceive their own needs as superfluous to others’-- and resent others as a consequence.

Another layer of complication is added when the parent in an enmeshed relationship is an addict, as Sarah Steel was. The enmeshed child often times becomes the physical caregiver to their parent as well and must cope with all the baggage loving an addict brings: the emotional rollercoaster of the parent trying to get clean or the reality of their neglecting or stealing from their child to support their habit or their simply being emotionally absent. Enmeshment leaves children with a lot of conflicting messages about their role in the family, how to conduct relationships, and how to define themself.

We only get an outside perspective on this enmeshment in the Steel family. It’s clear in the text that Juno’s relationship with his mother was fraught. He jokes in The Case of the Murderous Mask that she didn’t kill him but “not for lack of trying”, implying that Ben’s murder wasn’t the first time Sarah Steel lashed out at Juno-- or thought she was lashing out at Juno but hurt Ben instead. During the entire tenure Juno’s trek through the underworld of his own trauma, Juno asks the specter of Benzaiten over and over, “Why did you stay?”. This is a question that Juno himself can’t answer because Ben, when he was alive, probably never gave him an answer that Juno found satisfactory. There are a few possibilities, which I can guess from experience, as to what the answer was:

Ben may never have been able to articulate that his relationship with their mother left him feeling responsible for her wellbeing.

Or, if he ever told Juno that, Juno may have simply brushed off this concern. After all, as far as Juno was concerned, Sarah was only ever just evil. To protect himself from his mother’s neglect and codependence, Juno shut down his own ability to perspective-take and think about the nuances that might inform a person’s addiction, mental illness, abusive behavior, etc.

It is likely that Ben thought either his mother needed him to survive or, alternatively, that he couldn’t survive without her-- as if often the case with children who are enmeshed with their primary caregiver. It was natural and necessary for him, from this perspective, to stay. Enmeshment is a very real psychological trap.

It is often frustrating and hard as hell to love someone who is in an enmeshed relationship because, from the outside, the damage being done to them seems obvious. See: Juno’s assertion that Sarah was just evil. Juno is, even 19 years later, still angry about Sarah Steel and her failures as a parent and as a person. His thinking on this subject is very black-and-white. He positions Sarah as a Bad Guy in his discussions with Ben-the-psychopomp and the childhood cartoon slogan of “The Good Guys Always Win!” is repeated ad nauseum throughout Juno’s underworld journey. This mode of thinking serves two purposes:

First, it illustrates the role Juno played in the household: he was opposed to Sarah in all things and Sarah did not require any compassion or enmeshment from Juno. Juno was, quite possibly, neglected in favor of Ben which would create a deep resentment… toward both Sarah and toward Ben. This family dynamic would reinforce Juno’s shallow moral reasoning and leave him with vague, unachievable ideals to strive for like “Be One of the Good Guys” or “Don’t Be Like Mom” -- ideals that he can’t reach because he is a flawed human being and not a cartoon character, creating a feedback loop of resentment toward his mother and guilt about resenting Benzaiten. That guilt would further bolster Juno’s shallow memory of Ben as being infallibly patient, kind, loving, etc.

Second, Juno’s black/white moral reasoning is an in-text expression of the meaning behind Juno’s name. When “Rex Glass” points out that Juno is a goddess associated with protection, Juno immediately has a witty, bitter rejoinder ready about Juno-the-goddess killing her children. Juno was named for a deity who in some ways strongly resembles Sara Steel and he resents that he is literally being identified as his own mother. Juno-the-goddess has one hell of a temper, being the parallel to Rome’s Hera. Juno is not a goddess (detective) who forgives easily when she (he) knows that a child (Benzaiten Steel) has been harmed. This dichotomy of “venerated protector” versus “vengeful punisher” causes psychological tension for Juno that is only partially resolved in The Monster’s Reflection. The tension is not fully resolved, however, because Juno never gets a clear answer for the question, “Why did you stay?”

The answer is there but it is one that Juno doesn’t like and so can’t articulate: Ben is enmeshed with Sarah who named him, of all things, Benzaiten and that is why he stayed. We’ve already seen that names have intentional significance in the text. Benzaiten is hypothesized to be a syncretic deity between Hinduism and Buddhism, is a goddess primarily associated with water. Syncretic deities are fusions of similar deities from different religions/cultures; their existence is the result of compromise and perspective-taking and acceptance. Water, too, is forgiving in this way: it takes the shape of whatever container you pour it into... not unlike a child who is responsible for the emotional wellbeing of their entire family unit. Not unlike Benzaiten Steel.

Ben stayed with his mother because his relationship with his mother was enmeshed, leaving him little choice but to stay, and this ultimately led to tragedy. Sarah Steel’s failures as a parent are many and Juno still has a lot of baggage to unpack in that regard, especially where Ben is concerned. It’s unlikely that we’ll get the same kind of “speedrunning therapy” episode again but I know that The Penumbra is committed to a certain amount of psychological realism in its character arcs so I am confident in asserting that Juno Steel isn’t finished. Recovery is a journey and he’s only taken the first steps.

#juno steel #benzaiten steel #meta #the penumbra podcast #benten steel #sarah steel #psychology #enmeshment #bad parenting #iimpavid writes #chatter #the monster's reflection #the case of the murderous mask

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daniclaytcn · 3 years ago

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Hey, i love your blog and reading your thoughts on all things Buddie and there’s something i would love to have your input on. I don’t know if you saw posts like this, too, but there is an ongoing trend of people stating that there are two ways the show can go on with this, and that’s 1) keep on developing Buck and Eddie’s relationship (essentially leading to them becoming canon) or 2) untangle and distance them from each other and build up other love interests as the most important person in their life, leaving their friendship to be only referred to and rarely shown. And while i absolutely get where they are coming from and have seen mainstream tv taking that second path many times (don’t expect it from 911 though, i have faith in those writers)i think it’s simply not true that these are the only ways to write Buck and Eddie’s relationship going forward.

It absolutely is possible to keep their relationship as it is and still write different love interests for them. There will be less scenes with them together and I sure won’t fucking like it, but there is no need to have them become less important to each other. I hate that so many people seem to be not only of the impression that the most important person in someone’s life always HAS to be the romantic partner, but also that this place can’t be shared with someone else, like a best friend or some other platonically beloved person. I hate that people seem to be convinced that this is some kind of popularity contest that the love interest wins by default and that getting in a relationship with someone automatically makes your bond with others less important, automatically makes you invest less in those relationships. Not saying that that can’t happen, it sadly does quite often, but in 98% of those cases it’s because of a severe lack of trying from one party. It’s truly not in the nature of friendships that they deteriorate when not the sole focus of a person, you just have to be willing to put a little work in.

Anyway, rant over, would love to hear your thoughts on that matter.

hi, nonnie! first off, i'm so glad you like my blog and want my input on this! i do have a lot of thoughts on this, so here we go!

i have seen these takes going around, and while i don't necessarily disagree with them, i do agree with what you're saying. i don't know if buddie will go canon, but even if they don't, i highly doubt the show will shove their relationship to the side to prop up their new love interests. because look. the show has had every—and i mean every opportunity to take a step back from them since s2. they could've kept them at the place they were in the s2 finale, cute and shippable but not necessarily something fans would get invested in. they did not have to go as hard as they did with the tsunami and lawsuit arc. they didn't have to take every opportunity possible to cement them in each others' lives. these were all conscious choices, and this relationship is clearly too important to the writers to throw away just because both of them have new love interests. putting the rest under a cut:

onto your main point, while i don't really care for buddie staying platonic since they don't behave like other platonic relationships on the show and we have enough of that in media already, if they were to stay completely platonic, i don't see their relationship being diminished or undervalued by the writers and idk why people think that. it's like you said, just because you enter into a romantic relationship with someone else, doesn't mean your friends become less important. platonic love is only a different sort of love, not a lesser form. the writers have put way too much work into developing the buckley-diaz family unit, at the expense of buck and eddie's respective love interests, for them to suddenly sideline them completely in s5, regardless of whether they stay platonic or not. eddie was dating ana for about half a season and his relationship with buck never wavered, it only got stronger even. a bunch of the big buckxtaylor moments were overshadowed by buddie completely. whether you want to read buddie as platonic or not, their relationship with each other isn't gonna become any less important just because they have different love interests (who are side characters to boot, and won't even get as much screentime as either of them do. and this is assuming ana even shows up next season.)

It’s truly not in the nature of friendships that they deteriorate when not the sole focus of a person, you just have to be willing to put a little work in. this is so true, and in buck and eddie's case, both of them have always put a lot of hard work into their relationship and fought for it, in one way or the other. it hasn't been all sunshine and roses (contrast that to eddie's it's easy being with her in reference to ana). they're definitely not gonna forget about each other just because they're dating other people, especially in light of the finale.

i think a lot of this thinking ultimately boils down to heteronormativity. people are quick to assume that the m/f ship will automatically 'win' and receive better treatment than the bond between these two men, whether these people are buddie shippers or antis. people were (and still are) so hesitant to refer to buck, eddie and chris as a familial unit, but instantly jumped on the bandwagon after a couple of cute scenes with eddie, ana and chris. and i'm not trying to dunk on anybody—everybody is entitled to their own opinion and i respect that—it's just that its very telling that two men can go through so much together, form an unbreakable bond over three whole seasons, be completely devoted to each other, form a sort of a family unit along with one of their's son, have the other one who's not a parent yet even so fill in a parental sort of role, and people will still insist that seeing anything more is delusional, while automatically accepting that two women who have been on the show for about 6 episodes are gonna be there indefinitely and that the m/f ships are definitely endgame, and the bond between these two men will be sidelined in favor of that. it's all a very black and white sort of thinking, people need to understand that the story is deeper than that.

thank you for sharing your thoughts, nonnie!

#buddie #otp: you two have an adorable son #neethu answers

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c0smicheaux · 5 years ago

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Synastry House Overlays-Sun in the houses

Synastry is the compatibility between two birth charts. Compatibility is much more than our sun signs, it’s also about where they land in our chart and how it affects us and how you affect them.

First House-

Having someone’s Sun in your first house can make house person feel like their life has lighten up, the house person is proud of Sun person that they want to show them off. There is just something about the Sun person that makes House person so energetic. Sun person really likes the house person over all including their style and appearance, they hype up the house person and can give them a inflated ego and encourages spontaneity. Both people have the same level of energy and behavior style, and with that can come some level of competitiveness between the two. And even with the competition, these two can bring out the best in each other. This is a common synastry for marriage.

Second House-

This synastry overlay can be beneficial for house person, as the Sun person can give the house person fuel to become successful. Even with that energy from the Sun person, the house partner can still get a feeling like the house person wants something even though the Sun partner wants to help house explore their creativity and with achieving both of their goals. There is risk of becoming financially dependent on one another as both partners can be generous with each other. This isn’t necessarily a romantic synastry, but it can work. If there are negative aspects, there may be a more focus on material things and there could be resentment for material gain on either partner.

Third House-

Up late all night with nothing but talking. Having someone’s sun in the third house over lay brings stimulating conversations. There’s a similar intellectual interests and both partners could talk about trivia things all day and never get bored of each other. A strong mental connection comes with this over lay, unless badly aspected there is not many miscommunication between the two. Sun person makes the house person feel understood and appreciated and gets their gears going with debates. The Sun partner sees the house person as someone with good common sense and finds them to have some brilliance to them. They see the house person doing certain things right and they can find them a little predictable but they’re comfortable with that. A good synastry for writing partners. Romantic relationships are achievable with this overlay.

Fourth House-

There is an instant connection when someone’s sun lands in another person’s fourth house. Sun person reminds the house person of someone they know or comfortable with and ends up providing some sort of safe place for the Sun person to be able to talk freely about deep family issues and such. These two can feel like they’ve known each other their whole lives, even just having met, there is a deep sense of familiarity that can’t be ignored. Sun person can feel like they are meant to be together and can become protective of the house person. The house person can feel the same way and just from being around the sun person they feel a sense of security. The feeling of home is what these two people feel like. This is a very strong overlay for marriage/long-term relationships, there may even be a strong desire to move in together quickly and build a home.

Fifth House-

A very active, fun-having, and very social overlay. Having someone’s sun in the fifth house can push each other to have more fun than the other, hanging out all night whether its with just each other or at social events both partners will enjoy. They enjoy playing and hanging out each other and there is a genuine care feeling for one another. There is a risk of burn out or feeling frustrated with each other if other aspects don’t normally work out. Sun partner see house as a source of enjoyment and pleasure and they can wear rose-colored glasses and over look the house partner’s flaws. ’Beauty’ is what the house person thinks is when they see the Sun person, and the Sun person adores all the praise and admiration from house and has so much love for them. Both are able to enjoy each other romantically and sexually. A strong romantic and marital overlay, couple may even talk about having children together.

Sixth House-

There is a submissive feel when it comes to someone’s sun in the other person’s sixth house overlay, and no not what you think as in sexually. This is more of a boss/assistant type of relationship. The sun person gets weird feeling about how the house person goes about handling their daily tasks and tries to show them how to do things in a better way of handling them. Even though there is a chance for either partners to become the more submissive one, it’s usually the Sun person who becomes the submissive one. The house partner can micro-manage parts of the relationship even if they are enjoying the relationship with the sun. Having this overlay isn’t bad for a romance, but it is the best to have for a work relationship. If this is a work relationship, the house person could have hate towards the Sun person if they are a bad boss.

Seventh House-

Seventh house Sun overlay makes an opposite attraction between partners. The Sun person is opposite the house person’s ascendant, and if it’s not badly aspected, these opposites complement each other. The Sun person feels like there is a lot in common with the house person and can become very supportive of them, while the house person sense more that there is truly something deep going on between each other. There is a deep movement of feelings within each other that these people are meant to be together, like a lost part of you has been missing and this person makes you feel whole and united as one person not just simply a pair. A very yin and yang type of relationship. The danger of this synastry is that the two people can become so lost in each other, losing balance, that there is a loss of personal identity and there could be rebellion against each other trying to find themselves again. A very strong commitment synastry for marriage.

Eighth House-

If there is an eighth house over lay with the Sun in synastry, this is not a good synastry for faint-hearted people. A fear to be together that it almost feels bewitching. There is a deep mystery for the Sun person who is so captivated by the house person and even though the house partner can make the Sun person feel so unsettling, like something is telling them that the house partner is disturbing or too mysterious, the Sun person has a hard time trying to gain the will to leave. The house person awakens something in the Sun partner, something that not even the Sun person knew about, and wants to try to transform the Sun partner for the better, not everyone one surrounding the situation is going to be pleased by this. For the house partner, there is such a strong need for the Sun person that if the Sun partner wanted to leave, the house person may refuse to let go. There is an emotional dependency with these two people that it is scary for both partners.

Ninth House-

Similar world views and philosophies on a wide variety of subjects, novelty subjects and even deep religion views, there’s an expansion of knowledge and ideas when someone’s Sun is in another’s ninth house. The house partner stimulates new creativity in the Sun person with their own knowledge, while the Sun person helps the house partner open up to a whole new view of the world. There is a rise in adventurous attitude, a want to try new things with each other, even if there is a bit of risk to it, both partners feel like they have a whole new zest of energy they get from each other. This is a great synastry for educated friends and traveling synastry, even marriage.

Tenth House-

With having the Sun in the tenth house in synastry, this can be great for a couple who work together or even a political relationship. Each person admires the other’s looks and talents, and being with each other just feels more confident in the relationship. There is a chance that each other are able to help one another in their jobs. The Sun person helps the house be inspired with their career or creative work while the house person helps with lighten the work burden fears and limitations of the Sun partner. Even though this is not a very romantic overlay, one or both partners can look up to the other in awe and admiration.

Eleventh House-

These two can talk for days and share pretty similar ideas and can seem like they have a two-of-a-kind friendship. Even as lovers, they are both that and best friends, having the Sun in the eleventh house in overlays brings much support from both partners. The Sun partner shines and inspires the house person to go out and reach goals and become somewhat of a social asset for them, while the Sun partner feels comfortable around the house person and can feel at ease knowing they are with someone who can create this non-judgemental space for them. Even though this is not a deep emotional relationship synastry, still is a good aspect to have.

Twelfth House-

A mysterious house synastry with someone’s Sun in another’s twelfth house. There’s a mystical feeling about the house person, the Sun partner sees something in the house person may not realize, even if it’s against better judgement there’s a strong attraction. The Sun is just totally fantizied by the house partner. The house person can help the Sun discover hidden talents as well as help them use them depending on their intentions, sometimes they aren’t well. This is not a very public synastry for relationships, but both are comfortable enough to confide in each other about things they wouldn’t normally mention to anyone else. There may be a chance of intuitive connection between the two, this synastry has been considered a karmic connection from a past life that still needs healing. If this person came into your life at a certain point, it’s possible one or both needed some healing or helped in some way.

#astrology #astrology post #astrology fact #astrology placements #astrology posts #astrology facts #synastry #house placements #synastry in the houses #sun in the houses #sun astrology #synastry astrology

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spockandawe · 4 years ago

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Hi....If you don't mind me asking, who are your favorite MXTX characters (top 5 from each novel)? And why? I'm sorry if you've answered this question before.

It’s absolutely no problem at all!! I don’t think I’ve been asked this before, but hey, I also have zero object permanence, so it keeps things fresh and new. And it’s interesting to see how my answers change over time! Lemme see, I think I’m going to go in reverse order, because I feel like then I’ll be doing the worst agonizing up front.

TGCF

Fifth favorite: YIN. YU. I know that he’s a minor character and him even making it onto the list is pretty solid performance, but I do feel guilty that he isn’t higher than this. He came out of nowhere in my first reading and punched me in the stomach with emotions. I find his sections so hard to read, and I was DEVASTATED when he died and BEYOND stoked to find out he was still alive in the extras. His story hurts so much! I am weak against characters who have relatively modest goals and still see them snatched away (see also: my next entry) and have to struggle on. I wish wish wish I had a way to see more of how he made his peace with things after being thrown out of heaven, and the nature of the (distant) relationship with Hua Cheng and what happens with Quan Yizhen now that he died in his arms, and still came back anyways, my god!

Fourth favorite: He Xuannnnnn. I have a hard time articulating particulars, but. I love him a lot. I love a character with a grudge, with a deep, painful grudge, where the grudge is hurting him almost as much as it’s hurting the people around him, and setting the grudge aside would also hurt, and then what has any of this been for-- I've used this metaphor for other characters, but I don’t care if I’m overusing it, because I love it. He feels like a character caught in a thorn bush, where simply being there... hurts, but trying to escape or move in any ways is going to hurt worse, and there’s no path forward that doesn’t involve pain. And like... I don’t love the way he hurt Shi Qingxuan (who didn’t quite make this list adfasgdafsd I’M SORRY) but I wouldn’t have liked to see him swallow back down all that pain and set aside everything that happened to his family and fiancee either! I’m always, always soft for characters who have no good path forward and who grit their teeth and set out anyways.

Third favorite: MU QING!!!!!!!!!! I have done... extensive screaming about him. And I love him veryvery much. I can already tell that this list is going to have a lot of mean boys on it, and like... no regrets. Especially since this is one of my FAVORITE flavors, an unapologetic mean boy who is rarely (but sometimes!) soft for the people around him, and who regularly tries to do decently by people, but who consistently gets shat upon and misunderstood and accused of acting in bad faith. I screamed when he and Xie Lian finally got to talk their friendship out in the book. I also screamed when I realized how immediately after Xie Lian’s return he started looking out for him again, and how sincerely, despite his horrible attitude about it. I still want to write more fic for him so badly. I love him so much.

Second favorite: Xie Lian! What a good boy! The best boy! He’s so sweet and gentle, but also the best fightboy this world has ever seen, and also so gently snarky with the people he loves! I just... really love me some traumatized characters who have trouble recognizing that they can be Loved, and I’m not going to write this whole essay right now, but I think in some ways, he’s the most... passive about his romance, out of all the leads? Shen Qingqiu is aggressively oblivious, but Xie Lian kind of gently shrugs off the idea that he might be Hua Cheng’s special someone, until he finally gets hit with the cluestick. I generally shy away from the idea of a character “earning” love, but he’s maybe the mxtx character who moves me most with ‘you deserve to be loved’

Most favorite: Hua Cheng. HUA CHENG. Oh my god, gotta love this boy. Gotta love this devotion. I love a mean boy who is soft for one person, and he EMBODIES it. I mean, I love Shen Jiu, but he barely manages to do the soft thing at all, while Hua Cheng is over here like ‘if I could only be the stone beneath your feet--’ It’s hard to talk about him separately from Xie Lian, because they’re a unit in my head more than just about any other characters on this list are. I don’t want to get this list to get out of control, so I’m not going to scream for too long, but... I could just watch him go forever. I want to write him forever, and that’s a huge aspect of what draws me to some characters.

MDZS

Oh god, I think I lied, I think this book is going to be hardest. Making these choices is AGONIZING.

Fifth favorite: .....Lan Wangji. Oh god, I feel bad about how low he is. But this story is just packed SO full of wonderful characters, and I’m already consumed with guilt over all the characters who aren’t going to make it. I don’t love them less! But my love for characters in this particular story is very evenly distributed. And I think that Wang Yibo’s acting is possibly scoring points with me that the book might not have earned all by itself. Microexpressions and subtle body language add SO MUCH to a character with such flat affect, and I would be drawn to such a closed-off character anyways, but it really helps. And I love, like... the combined subtlety and intensity of his relationships. It’s not that subtle once you know what to look for, and the brother/sworn brother network makes for varying degrees of how much other characters understand of the things he chooses not to explicitly express, and it gives a really interesting character to the way he interacts with the people around him. Also, love me a man with intense separation anxiety.

Fourth favorite: Jiang Yanli? I think it has to be Jiang Yanli, but these rankings are hard. So. I just talked about how much I enjoy the flat affect and closed off nature of Lan Wangji? Well, guess what, I also love it when m’girl is just very GENUINELY AND OPENLY an absolute sweetheart of a person, and I love the contrast between her genuinely kind nature and the uncomfortable pressure that her family’s dynamics put on her to start parenting at a very young age. It’s not necessarily a happy situation, but she adores her brothers so much and they adore her so much! And it’s... a very understated element of the story, but after her parents died, her baby brothers went off to war, and one wreaked havoc as a straightforward commander and one of them disappeared for months and returned as a creepy-ass zombie puppeteer. And she STILL dotes on them like before, despite knowing what they’re capable of. Like, yes, Wei Wuxian just raised an army of corpses and forced a man to eat himself, but I shall still boop him on the nose and feed him Soup. How can I not adore energy like that?

Third favorite: Wei Wuxian, I think. I do adore him a lot. He gives me some of the same vibes that make me ache most with Xie Lian, where he is trying his best, and is struggling to hold on in the face of lots of suffering, and I find it really interesting that when the suffering peaked, Xie Lian was forced go on because he couldn’t die, while Wei Wuxian... expired. That line about ‘he thought that no matter how large the world was, there was still no place for him’ always sticks with me, and hurts me deeply. Xie Lian had most of his personal attachments stripped away, and was left to wander on his own, while Wei Wuxian still had a number of strong connections left, but abruptly exited life. And that informs their respective trauma so interestingly! The way Wei Wuxian bounces between high energy chaos and drained exhaustion is really fascinating to me, and was the thread that held me attached to the book through a very confusing beginning. And I’m still very drawn to how intensely he loves, whether it’s Xiao Zhan’s fantastic acting, or it’s him busting out with how much he wants Lan Wangji in the middle of the Guanyin Temple scene. He’s a fantastic character, honestly, I don’t think such a convoluted book would have held together very well without a protagonist this strong.

Second favorite: Xue Yang :X Look, he’s a good boy and I love him. Who among us hasn’t done a few mass murders that we are completely unrepentant about, but that we would really like to keep hidden from our current boyfriend, actually? Anyways, as always, love me an angry boy who makes terrible decisions for understandable reasons. And I do love a character who is consumed by agonized ragrets (see my next entry), but I DO also love me a character who has no regrets at all and doesn’t even have much interest in trying to justify himself to anyone else around him. Just look at that confidence! Look at him go!!

Most favorite: Jiang... Cheng....... I knew he and Xue Yang were going to be at the top, but those were the only parts of this list that were easy. I mean. Love a self-sabotaging angryboy who is also super super sad and keeps hurting himself in his own confusion. And while I love the romantic thread in all of the mxtx books, the agonized family thread in mdzs is one of my favorite parts, and something that I don’t really see echoed in any of the other stories. I need ten million jc+wwx reconciliations, at LEAST. He’s so sad! And so angry! And I want to see him becoming less of that thing, and for Jin Ling and Wei Wuxian to demonstrate very firmly how much they love him, because they do. I am invested in his happiness in a way that goes far and beyond any of the other non-main characters, haha

SVSSS

Fifth favorite: Tianlang-jun. I think? Oh god, but moshang. THIS IS REALLY HARD, I HATE THIS ;-; But especially since writing my fic, Tianlang-jun has really won me over. And like, he already hurt me good in the novel, just thinking about how he was an innocent young guy, just! Trying to have a girlfriend! And instead got trapped in sensory deprivation, body-rotting-hell for twenty years, when he didn’t do anything wrong!!! He suffered, so much! And I live for his intensely strained relationship with Luo Binghe, because it’s! Perfectly understandable and painful, from both of their perspectives! And he wants to hate humans so badly, but in the end, when he’s told that Su Xiyan never betrayed him, he starts helplessly asking the people around him, ‘really? is it really true?’ and then in the end he loses the only family member he has left who cares about him, and it’s just! Everything is terrible! I have a su xiyan au brewing in my head because I can’t stand it! Someone just give this man a loving partner!!!

Fourth favorite: Shen Qingqiu. But... moshang??? Goddammit. Anyways, this dumbass. I find him so endearing, in his dumbassery. I sometimes get a bit frustrated with Wei Wuxian for being oblivious, and Shen Qingqiu is just asking for me to react the same way, but I... don’t, for the most part? Because he thinks he has good information, and he’s slow to react to a changing playing field, and I still haven’t read another transmigration novel that strikes the same balance of hypercompetence and intense incompetence :ppp It’s a funny book, and he’s a funny character! And I really vibe with him, in most parts of the story, which covers a pretty darn wide emotional spectrum. Plus, the running internal commentary is choice.

Third favorite: Liu Qingge. Look, I’m a woman of simple needs, and sometimes I just need a high-quality fightboy who clearly cares deeply and is absolute garbage at expressing his emotions. I can’t articulate it much better than that. I absolutely howl at the succubus extra, when Shen Qingqiu is talking to Madam Meiyin about his future partner, and Liu Qingge is like ‘oh my god, sHE IS CLEARLY DESCRIBING ME’ and Shen Qingqiu is like ‘haha, liu-shidi, i thought you thought this was stuupidddddddd’. They’re both so dumb. I love them so much. But stupidity plus war god fighting energy has a narrow lead over stupidity and internal commentary track.

Second favorite: SHEN JIU. GOD. I’m still arguing with myself over whether he should go first, but Luo Binghe hurts me consistently through the whole entire story, so I think he wins. Shen Jiu just stabs me in the heart at strategic moments. This is it. My ideal mean boy who is soft for one (1) person, and who BOTH does unconscionable things for terrible reasons (someone just. give him a pile of girls to teach, it will be much more pleasant for everyone involved), and who ALSO gets blamed for things he didn’t do even when he tries to act in good faith. It is the best of all painful worlds. And even at the end, when he has a powerful person who wants desperately to protect him, he still tries his hardest to shove that person away, to keep him safe. I’ve got like four aus where he gets to live. I’m so invested in this character, I love him so much.

Most favorite: Luo Binghe. He was.... made for me............ Like, the overwhelming amounts of childhood angst were baked in by Shang Qinghua, but the in-story pain and suffering is PRECISELY my jam. I love a character with separation anxiety! I love a character with massive anxieties over being unwanted! Over nobody ever, EVER just choosing him! I love a character struggling with the idea that the person he loves most in the world thinks that he’s intrinsically Disgusting! I love the kind of stubborn determination that leads him to preserve a corpse for five years, desperately hoping for a way to revive it, constantly cooking fresh food, in case, in case he someday wakes up. The way Hua Cheng loves is overpowering, but he’s had time to like... learn to be mellow when he needs to be. Luo Binghe doesn’t have a chill bone in his body, and if he’s acting chill, it’s probably because he’s done some mental math and decided that being more clingy right now will probably get him pushed away harder. I love the combination of manipulative tendencies and a very, very genuine fear of rejection and being unwanted. There is nothing I don’t love about Luo Binghe, including his worst decisions. I love him so so much.

#spock replies #long post/#svsss #mdzs #tgcf #thanad-zid

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vickyvicarious · 4 years ago

Note

what do you make of Eliot's pre-show reputation for working alone? it makes sense for Parker and Hardison, who've always worked that way, but Eliot has a history of working as part of a team in various contexts

Yeah, it's definitely interesting! Really, Sophie never gets that label of 'always working alone' (and in fact later we see her bringing in Tara, which supports that she has friendly contacts still). It's just Parker, Hardison, and Eliot. And like you said, it makes complete sense for Parker, and even Hardison's hacking is just typically more suited to be done alone even if he is a social guy on a personal level. Eliot is different, given his history.

One thing I noticed a while ago, which is also interesting, is that Eliot's job by its very nature depends on other people. Sophie, Parker, and Hardison all steal what they want - as retrieval specialist, Eliot had to be hired. That's not to say he never just took something he wanted, necessarily, but his role majorly depended on people a) knowing of him in the first place, b) trusting his reputation enough to hire him, and c) being able to get in touch with him to hire him. I highly doubt he was handing out business cards left and right, so he had to have a network of contacts to at the very least pass his name along as an 'I know just the guy for the job' kind of thing. In fact, we see him bring in a friend on a con early in S1, and he is in contact with/does jobs for old military contacts throughout the show. (Once again, in the first episode Parker and Hardison were successfully recruited for someone else’s job, so it's not like that never happened for the others. But the general trend was that they picked their own heists; Eliot was hired on by other people.)

So we have a guy here who has a history of working on teams, a reputation as a loner, and yet still actively works for people who he has to keep on good enough terms to keep hiring him. How did that happen? In my opinion, it all comes back to Damien Moreau.

Eliot's timeline goes through some distinct phases:

Rural teen with a relatively poor family, I think they mention he played football; very all-American.

Joined the army with "a flag on his shoulder and God in his heart" or however that quote went.

Highly trained military operative involved in very classified operations.

Working for Damien Moreau.

Working solo as a retrieval specialist.

Leverage.

It's easy to track him through 1-3. He was recruited into the army with promises of heroism and glory, excelled at what he did, was eventually disillusioned. Getting from there to Moreau is a bit more of a jump, and likely didn't happen immediately. Given how protective Eliot gets over people he's working with, and how vigorously he hates betrayals of trust from his team, I think it's not unreasonable to assume that part of the reason he left the army had to do with whatever unit he was in getting very hurt. Likely in a way that made him feel he failed to protect them; maybe he was the only one who made it out of one specific situation. Maybe just a bunch of people he worked with got whittled down, or maybe it wasn't anything so deadly but he saw how little their lives mattered in the grand scheme of those in charge, saw how amoral the missions he was given were, and it was more of a gradual slide into illegality. There's also the detail that as he got into more and more classified work, he might be less and less likely to have a large group of people he could talk to/be a regular team with. Either way, I think Moreau didn't completely hire him straight out of the army, but there probably wasn't a tremendously long time between him leaving that group and joining up with Moreau.

*I originally thought Eliot didn't meet Toby until after he left Moreau, but a helpful anon corrected me on that! 'In the French Connection Job he says to Nate "I was out of the service and working for my 2nd PMC", doing wetwork.' He 'should've' killed Toby but instead stayed with him for months, 'learning how to cook and how to feel'. It certainly seems like he had gone some degree of numb after his experiences in the army and even since leaving it. His second private military contract/company... still implies he was working for organizations of some sort, though I get the impression he wasn't sticking around for terribly long times. Still, even if he then works solo retrieval type gigs for a while, I don't think he was nearly as insistent on working alone/had such a clear reputation about it, not yet.

Eliot no longer believed that he was doing good. He'd lost his naive patriotism and seems to have lost his religion for the most part as well. He didn't trust the system, but for the most part he still seemed to have faith in individuals. He still kept in touch with some old colleagues, he'd learned from Toby; he still wanted to be a part of something, even if that something couldn't be the US Army. He's a self-motivated criminal now but he still isn't averse to working with others.

Then comes Damien Moreau. Whether you read their relationship as romantic or not, it was undeniably important and personal. They knew one another well. Damien even still liked Eliot years after he'd left. There's good evidence for them having an emotionally abusive relationship where Moreau took advantage of Eliot's tendency to do things for those he cares about (I reblogged a great meta on this a little while ago). But essentially what we see here is that in all his time working for Moreau, no one else made such a strong impression on Eliot. Moreau definitely seems the type to play favorites and emotionally distance Eliot from other goons - Eliot isn't just another goon after all, he's the best. He's worthy of Damien's time and attention and specific assignments that only Eliot can be trusted to get done right. Whatever process of estrangement Eliot's superior skills may have begun, Moreau quickened until there was only one person who was the most important to him. Eliot didn't just work for him as a part of some vast criminal network by the end - no, he worked directly for and with Moreau himself. He was part of a team of two for all intents and purposes, regardless of how often he may have cooperated with others on specific jobs (though I suspect that got less frequent over time as well).

And when Eliot realized how deep he'd gotten, how terrible he'd become? He left, and left Damien Moreau specifically behind. Maybe he took a break for a while, went underground... it certainly doesn't seem like he had a conversation with Moreau and resigned so much as he just ran. And when he returned it was as a solo act. What this tells me is that not only did his time with Moreau break Eliot's trust in himself, it broke his ability to trust others. Not everyone necessarily, but in a working capacity. It probably was not the first time he'd experienced betrayal (in some form or another, his time in the army definitely qualified) but it was the most personal. Eliot trusted and liked Moreau - and he did the worst things in his entire life for him.

He couldn't repeat that. He couldn't leave himself open to getting sucked in like that again. And what's more, at this point he really didn't need to. His skills were such that he could get the job done himself (and had perhaps even honed those more solo skills while working for Moreau), and doing so meant that he never had to leave himself vulnerable to someone else like that again. He didn't have to be responsible for someone else getting hurt, and he didn't have to accept that he'd put someone else in charge of who he hurt. Eliot starts being more careful not to permanently injure or kill people, starts getting more selective with his jobs, and makes it a requirement that he works them alone. He still has to accept jobs from others, yeah, but he has ultimate control over what jobs he does accept, and if he operates purely on a freelance basis without getting too involved with any one client, then he can avoid the emotional entanglement that lead to such horrific loss of judgement in the past. It's hard, because he is naturally drawn to other people... but Eliot thinks that letting no one in is by far the safer option for everyone involved. He still builds relationships with others in order to get his name out, and may do repeat work for certain people, but no one is going to own him anymore. He is good enough that he can afford to set the terms like that; when he keeps getting the job done the word will spread that even alone he is worth the money. Eliot relies only on himself and any relationships he has are necessarily shallow. Professional, brief. This extends even to friendships (that seem to involve infrequent contact for the most part) and romantic relationships (he has plenty of sex but doesn't get emotionally close to anyone, does not fall in love). He is alone - in fact he is emphatically and outspokenly alone, because he doesn't want anyone to get their hooks in him like that ever again.

(*Doing jobs like this also limits the likelihood, especially in the beginning, that he's going to end up working for Moreau again in any real capacity. As time passes and Moreau doesn't attempt to bring him back too hard, that may become less of an issue in his mind, but it could certainly be a perk at least as the start.)

Then of course we eventually come to Leverage. It's been a while since Moreau. Eliot has built a solid reputation for himself - and he is being offered a LOT of money for a job that promises to be fairly quick. At this point, he probably feels like maybe he can trust himself as part of a team again without getting too sucked in - he will just keep it to one job and go his own way afterwards. It'll be fine.

...And then he immediately gets sucked in, bonds right away and wants so badly to stay. But even then, it's because of Nate. Eliot knows Nate, trusts him to be the 'honest man', is certain enough of Nate's moral compass that it's okay to get drawn in if Nate is the one making the plans. If it weren't for him, Eliot would have walked right away. Eliot was never going to allow himself to be ruled by others again... but Nate isn't like any of those people, he is a good man. Eliot can trust him not to lead him into anything too morally wrong, and in fact the work with Leverage is a way to bring some good back into the world. Not redeem himself, that won't ever happen, but under Nate's leadership Eliot can do something good for once. He doesn't want to stop.

By the time he moves past trusting Nate's judgement so much, he already trusts and loves the whole team. Parker and Hardison especially, so now he has to stay to keep them safe... even from Nate's plans sometimes, when he gets drunk and reckless. Eliot is secure in his role as part of a team again - and he probably was very lonely without one for all that time. It's not really in his nature to work alone long-term. And a key difference this time is that everyone else gets just as invested as he, and there's a good balance of power and respect unlike all of the more hierarchical teams he was in before (army, Moreau, they would have clear command structures - hell, even high-school football has a captain and a coach). Nate is nominally in charge but they talk back to him and lead where they have the most expertise. They dedicate themselves to him as much as he to them, they change together. And they change for the better, together.

#leverage #eliot spencer #leverage meta #my meta #anonymous #replies

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elumish · 4 years ago

Note

Is being able to reconcile only after saving them from an injury bad writing? They never had much of a healthy relationship fyi. I won’t go into it but it’s because they hold too much power over each other.

Without knowing more about your story, it’s hard to give a more detailed answer, but I will say, with an caveat, that it is not necessarily bad writing. Experiencing a major event will often cause a shift in a relationship, good or bad, and this can certainly be an example of that.

My caveat is this: it’s really common for relationships (esp romantic relationships) in stories to rely primarily on external factors: the circumstances they find themselves in drive the relationship rather than their own chemistry or reasons for liking each other. It’s easy to say that two people who find themselves together for some reason end up together; it’s a lot harder to say why beyond the general amatonormative assumption that romance is the inevitable final stage of a relationship.

So if one of them saving the other from an injury is the only reason they reconcile, it’s probably not great writing. What else has changed to make their relationship more functional or feasible than it was before they reconciled? Are either/both of them in a different stage of their life where they’re more open to a relationship? Do they have a healthier relationship with themselves that would make them more suited to a stable relationship? Has something changed about their opinion of the other person or the circumstances that caused them to separate in the first place?

Or is it more functional now? Maybe they still won’t work out and will become separated or estranged again. But if you intend for these people to stay together following this reconciliation (as romantic or platonic partners, or as part of a familial unit), there should be something different internal to the state of their relationship and not just this one external shift of the prevented injury.

#relationships #romantic relationships #reconciliation #Anonymous

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dweemeister · 3 years ago

Text

2021 Movie Odyssey Awards

With the 2021 Movie Odyssey Award for Best Original Song in the books, the 2021 Movie Odyssey Awards are the latest they’ve ever been. As you might know, this is the annual awards ceremony to recognize a year of films that I saw for the first time in their entirety in the calendar year. Every single one of the films nominated below - with the exception of those in the Worst Picture category nominated for nothing else - are worth seeing.

The full list of every single film I saw as part of the 2021 Movie Odyssey can be seen in this link. Those are the films eligible for the below.

Best Pictures (I'm naming ten, I'm not distinguishing one above the other nine)

The Bad Seed (1956)

Chess of the Wind (1976, Iran)

The Devil and Daniel Webster (1941)

Elmer Gantry (1960)

The Father (2020)

Intruder in the Dust (1949)

The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp (1943)

Los tallos amargos (1956, Argentina)

So This is Paris (1926)

Yi Yi (2000, Taiwan)

You either had to be rated a 9, a 9.5, or a 10 to get up here in Best Picture. Not easy to do. In this slate, you have two psychological thrillers in the form of The Bad Seed and Chess of the Wind - the former arguably innovating the evil child trope and the latter a social commentary on class and gender in pre-Revolutionary Iran. Religious tenets and fidelity are tested in The Devil and Daniel Webster and Elmer Gantry. The former a Faustian allegory in nineteenth century America; the latter an adaptation of Sinclair Lewis’ satire on evangelical Christianity in the United States.

You’ll not find many better films on aging than The Father, and not as many Southern Gothic dramas as darker or as incendiary on racial relations than Intruder in the Dust. Los tallos amargos, like a handful of films in this lineup (Chess of the Wind, The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp, is lucky to have received a recent restoration taking the current print to its pristine visual glory. And it’s a reminder that sometimes non-American film noir could be better than the nation the subgenre originated from. So This is Paris is premier Lubitsch romantic farce, a wonderful comedy of manners.

And in The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp and Yi Yi, you have two sprawling epics. The first from Powell and Pressburger on the justifications and justness of British wars, what it means to fight wars justly, and the idea of warfare as a “noble” exercise. For Yi Yi, it is a beautiful domestic drama following a Taiwanese family into the twenty-first century, as they all wrestle with others’ foibles and conflicting perspectives, the unknowable,. the misunderstood, and unspoken human truths in a place at once unmistakably Taiwanese,. but also rapidly Westernizing.

Best Comedy

Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein (1948)

A Chump at Oxford (1939)

Clue (1985)

The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T (1953)

Follow That Dream (1962)

Hairspray (1988)

How to Steal a Million (1966)

The Mitchells vs the Machines (2021)

Monkey Business (1952)

So This is Paris

Not necessarily the best film, but usually the one that I found the funniest this year. Sure, I laughed out loud more during The Mitchells vs the Machines, but there was a bit too much humor dating it in the 2020s for me. For simple wit and situational humor, I found Peter O’Toole and Audrey Hepburn simply a delight to watch as they attempted to steal a forged artwork.

Other honorable mentions include Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein (a terrible Universal Monsters movie, but perhaps the best A+C movie) and the manic, Tim Curry-starring Clue. The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T is here and in the next category as Seussian nightmare fuel.

Best Musical

Carefree (1938)

Down Argentine Way (1940)

The Five Pennies (1959)

The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T

G.I. Blues (1960)

In the Heights (2021)

Oklahoma! (1955)

Orchestra Wives (1942)

Romance on the High Seas (1948)

West Side Story (2021)

Oh what a beautiful mornin’ / oh what a beautiful day / I’ve got a sunshiney feeling / everything’s goin’ my way. And certainly it did for the adaptation of Rodgers and Hammerstein’s Oklahoma!. A lush, CinemaScope adaptation of the R&H musical, Gordon MacRae is brilliant, as is a young Shirley Jones in her film debut (Jones was the only person ever personally contracted to the duo). Close behind were The Five Pennies (Danny Kaye as jazz cornettist Red Nichols in a musical biopic), Orchestra Wives (be still my ears whenever Glenn Miller is playing), and this year’s edition of West Side Story.

Best Animated Feature

Batman: Mask of the Phantasm (1993)

Encanto (2021)

Luca (2021)

The Mitchells vs the Machines

Raya and the Last Dragon (2021)

Very meager pickings in this category compared to the usual slate of animated features I do get to see. This one wasn’t even close. A sort of spin off from Batman: The Animated Series, one could really not ask for a better animated film to add to the Batman mythos. A stunning, haunting work from those creatives at Warner Bros. animation.

Best Documentary

Berlin: Symphony of a Great City (1927, Germany)

City Hall (2020)

Đoạn trường vinh hoa (The Glorious Pain) (2020, Vietnam)

Freedom on My Mind (1994)

Jazz on a Summer’s Day (1959)

The Kids are Alright (1979)

Les Rivières (The Rivers) (2019, France)

Paul Robeson: Tribute to an Artist (1979 short)

16 Days of Glory (1986)

Tex Avery, the King of Cartoons (1988)

Jazz on a Summer’s Day is a concert film showcasing the 1958 Newport Jazz Festival in Rhode Island and contains performances from the likes of Louis Armstrong, Mahalia Jackson, Dinah Washington, Thelonious Monk, and Chuck Berry (not a jazz musician, but undoubtedly jazz influenced). I also considered Frederick Wiseman’s City Hall and the official 1984 Summer Olympics documentary 16 Days of Glory for this award.

Best Non-English Language Film

Adoption (1975), Hungary

Chess of the Wind, Iran

The End of Summer (1961), Japan

Giòng Sông Không Nhìn Thấy (The Unseen River) (2020 short), Vietnam

Limite (1931), Brazil

Los tallos amargos, Argentina

Loving Couples (1964), Sweden

Tomka and His Friends (1977), Albania

Woman in the Moon (1929), Germany

Yi Yi, Taiwan

Best Silent Film

À Propos de Nice (1930 short, France)

Berlin: Symphony of a Great City

Fanchon, the Cricket (1915)

Limite

Madame’s Cravings (1907 short, France)

Pardon Us (1931)

The Patsy (1928)

The Red Lily (1924)

So This is Paris

Woman in the Moon

A brief shout-out to Fritz Lang’s Woman in the Moon as his second film after Metropolis. Lang’s sci-fi movie introduced a lot of ideas that would be adapted for sci-fi (and real life) later on. The movie is a bit of a drag, though, during its Earthbound scenes.

Elsewhere, Lillian Gish is amazing as the title character in Fanchon, the Cricket. Alice Guy-Blache’s short film Madame’s Cravings was one of the funnier things I saw all year, and Berlin: Symphony of a Great City is a fascinating tone poem of a documentary, and of a place in between the World Wars.

Personal Favorite Film

Clue

The Devil and Daniel Webster

Dream Horse (2020)

Evil Under the Sun (1982)

The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp

Minari (2020)

Murder Ahoy! (1964)

Silverado (1985)

To Each His Own (1946)

Yi Yi

Yeah, I’m a sucker for the Western genre. Silverado had somewhat of an offbeat cast for a Western (Kevin Kline, Danny Glover, Scott Glenn, Rosanna Arquette, Jeff Goldblum as the villain, Kevin Costner and John Cleese), but holy hell was it so much fun. And having the year’s best film score does not hurt!

Elsewhere, Dream Horse was simple but it was the first film I saw in a theater after being doubled-vaccinated. Evil Under the Sun and Murder Ahoy! are Hercule Poirot and Ms. Marple movies adapted from Agatha Christie’s books, respectively. Both treatments and performances - from Peter Ustinov and Margaret Rutherford, respectively - were immaculately done. And To Each His Own ripped my heart out and sewed it back together in two hours. What an emotional rollercoaster that was.

Best Director

Mohammad Reza Aslani, Chess of the Wind

Fernando Ayala, Los tallos amargos

Richard Brooks, Elmer Gantry

Clarence Brown, Intruder in the Dust

William Dieterle, The Devil and Daniel Webster

Ernst Lubitsch, So This is Paris

Michael Powell and Emeric Pressburger, The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp

Frederick Wiseman, City Hall

Edward Yang, Yi Yi

Picking up their first ever Best Director award here are the duo of Powell and Pressburger, whom you may know better for Stairway to Heaven (1946) and The Red Shoes (1948). The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp always tends to be relegated in conversations about the duo, but it a highwire balancing act that earns them their win here. Close behind are Edward Yang and Mohammad Rezas Aslani.

Best Acting Ensemble

The Bad Seed

Belfast (2021)

Elmer Gantry

Intruder in the Dust

The Joy Luck Club (1993)

Licorice Pizza (2021)

Man on a Tightrope (1953)

Minari

Take a Giant Step (1959)

Yi Yi

No standout performances, but on the average... the best-acted movie I saw all year. Subtle performances reflecting the loneliness and attempts to muddle through life of all of its characters involved. Challenging Yi Yi most closely were The Bad Seed, Intruder in the Dust, and The Joy Luck Club.

Best Actor

Riz Ahmed, Sound of Metal (2019)

Carlos Cores, Los tallos amargos

Anthony Hopkins, The Father

Burt Lancaster, Elmer Gantry

Roger Livesey, The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp

Fredric March, The Dark Angel (1935)

Ganjirô Nakamura, The End of Summer

Gregory Peck, The Stalking Moon (1968)

Paul Robeson, The Emperor Jones (1933)

Wu Nien-jen, Yi Yi

From my review:

For his turn as the eponymous lead, Burt Lancaster, known for his vigorous performances, provides Elmer Gantry with vigor aplenty. Modeling his performance off of the behavior of baseball outfielder-turned-evangelist Billy Sunday, Lancaster struts around the tent during revival meetings, his upper body animated in conversation and salesmanship outside those meetings. Even in stillness, Lancaster’s physicality swaggers, brimming with euphoria – his most private moments abound in sexuality molded by what his character might call the love of God. Even Lancaster’s haircut appears to be defying gravity more than usual in Elmer Gantry. The sweat on his brow, within the 1:66:1 frame, feels as if it is about to seep through the camera. As he delivers his lines, Lancaster masters the complicated beat – accelerating with certain turns of phrases and strategic pauses for emphasis – and wildly varying volume of Elmer’s sermons. “Love is like the morning and the evening stars,” he intones as Gantry (that is his signature quote), somehow making us believe in such bromides and other simplifications he sells to the revival’s attendees.

Hopkins was the only other performer I was consdering here.

Best Actress

Enid Bennett, The Red Lily

Katalin Berek, Adoption

Olivia de Havilland, To Each His Own

Nancy Kelly, The Bad Seed

Fakhri Khorvash, Chess of the Wind

Merle Oberon, The Dark Angel

Mary Pickford, Fanchon, the Cricket

Diana Ross, Lady Sings the Blues (1972)

Eva Marie Saint, The Stalking Moon

Jean Simmons, Elmer Gantry

Also from my review:

Over the course of the story’s three decades, Olivia de Havilland must transform from a naïve young adult reveling in her attractiveness to men to a hardened, middle-aged spinster who has all but put her past behind her... Everything de Havilland has done up to this point in her performance – her witticisms and pointed requests, wordless joy and sorrow – suffuses the final half-hour with Jody’s regrets and desire to be the mother she never could be. All of Jody’s frailties and inner strength pour through in the end and we, the viewers, feel every hint of embarrassment, fortitude, desire, and self-doubt. This is a masterclass leading performance from Olivia de Havilland

De Havilland was in a class of her own this year.

Best Supporting Actor

Jonathan Chang, Yi Yi.

Soumitra Chatterjee, Teen Kanya (1961, India)

Ralph Fiennes, The Dig (2021)

Juano Hernandez, Intruder in the Dust

Walter Huston, The Devil and Daniel Webster

Vassili Lambrinos, Los tallos amargos

Frank Langella, The Trial of the Chicago 7 (2020)

Arthur Kennedy, Elmer Gantry

Paul Raci, Sound of Metal

Anton Walbrook, The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp

Walbrook, an Austrian actor working in Britain who was often saddled with playing “continental European” roles, plays an unlikely character in a British film at a time when Britain’s existence was under existential threat. Here, he plays a “good German”, who is the best friend of Roger Livesey’s protagonist, who is torn between two lands and his duties as a soldier and that of a friend. One of the performances of the year in my book.

I was also considering Juano Hernandez and Walter Huston here as well.

Best Supporting Actress

Eileen Heckart, The Bad Seed

Estelle Hemsley, Take a Giant Step

Shirley Jones, Elmer Gantry

Deborah Kerr, The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp

Patty McCormack, The Bad Seed

Olga Merediz, In the Heights

Beah Richards, Take a Giant Step

Aparna Sen, Teen Kanya

Gyöngyvér Vigh, Adoption

Youn Yuh-jung, Minari

Aparna Sen appears in the third part of Teen Kanya (Three Daughters), an anthology film from Indian filmmaker Satyajit Ray (who worked in Bengali cinema). Sen stars as an arranged bride in what is a starmaking turn for her. It was only her second film role, one to launch a lengthy career in the film industry (mostly nowadays as a writer/director). I was also considering Shirley Jones and Estelle Hemsley here.

Best Adapted Screenplay

Francis Searle, Cloudburst (1951)

Dan Totheroh and Stephen Vincent Benét, The Devil and Daniel Webster

Richard Brooks, Elmer Gantry

Florian Zeller and Christopher Hampton, The Father

Harry Kurnitz, How to Steal a Million

Ben Maddow, Intruder in the Dust

Amy Tan and Ronald Bass, The Joy Luck Club

Sergio Leonardo, Los tallos amargos

Richard Wright and Pierre Chenal, Native Son (1951)

Wendell Mayes and Alvin Sargent, The Stalking Moon

Best Original Screenplay

Paul Schrader, The Card Counter (2021)

Kôgo Noda and Yasujirô Ozu, The End of Summer

Heidi Ewing and Alan Page Arriaga, I Carry You with Me (2020)

Paul Thomas Anderson, Licorice Pizza

Michael Powell and Emeric Pressburger, The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp

Ava DuVernay, Middle of Nowhere (2012)

Lee Isaac Chung, Minari

Darius Marder and Abraham Marder, Sound of Metal

Charles Brackett and Jacques Théry, To Each His Own

Edward Yang, Yi Yi

Best Cinematography (TIE)

Houshang Baharloo, Chess of the Wind

Joseph H. August, The Devil and Daniel Webster

Lionel Lindon, Grand Prix (1966)

Georges Perinal, The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp

Ricardo Younis, Los tallos amargos

Sven Nykvist, Loving Couples

Erik Messerschmidt, Mank (2020)

Meek’s Cutoff (2010)

Robert Surtees and Floyd Crosby, Oklahoma!

Yang Wei-han, Yi Yi

Couldn’t make up my mind here. How could I choose between the elegance of Baharloo’s cinematography amid those gorgeous sets and the nightmarish film noir camerawork from Younis (a Chilean trained by Gregg Toland, who shot Citizen Kane)? Far too difficult for me, this category.

Best Film Editing

Lasse Hallström, Malou Hallström, and Ulf Neidermar, ABBA: The Movie (1977)

Walter Ruttmann, Berlin: Symphony of a Great City

Robert Wise, The Devil and Daniel Webster

George Amy, Doctor X (1932)

Yorgos Lamprinos, The Father

Fredric Steinkamp, Henry Berman, Stewart Linder, and Frank Santillo, Grand Prix

Myron Kerstein, In the Heights

John Seabourne Sr., The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp

Carol Littleton, Silverado

Uncredited, Woman in the Moon

Best Adaptation or Musical Score

ABBA, ABBA: The Movie

Victor Baravalle and Irving Berlin, Carefree

Emil Newman, Down Argentine Way

Joseph J. Lilley, G.I. Blues

Alex Lacamoire, Lin-Manuel Miranda, and Bill Sherman, In the Heights

Leith Stevens, The Five Pennies

Morris Stoloff, The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T

Robert Russell Bennett, Jack Blackton, and Adolph Deutsch, Oklahoma!

Leigh Harline and Alfred Newman, Orchestra Wives

Ray Heindorf, Jule Styne, and Sammy Cahn, Romance on the High Seas

Matthew Rush Sullivan, West Side Story

Quite simply, the most fun musical score I heard this year. This category advantages original musicals over musical adaptations and scores that borrow heavily from existing music. If not Orchestra Wives, I might have gone for The Five Pennies here.

Best Original Score

Bruce Broughton, Silverado

Bernard Herrmann, The Devil and Daniel Webster

Germaine Franco, Encanto

Lee Holdridge, 16 Days of Glory

Fred Karlin, The Stalking Moon

André Previn, Elmer Gantry

Miklós Rózsa, Jungle Book (1942)

Shirley Walker, Batman: Mask of the Phantasm

John Williams, How to Steal a Million

Hans Zimmer, Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)

Those horn rips. Those horn rips, man (to all other instrumentalists, a horn rip is a glissando). Silverado was a delight to watch but especially to listen to. Bruce Broughton is a perennially underrated composer and one who truly lets his themes develop in such a natural, beautifully flowing way.

Of special mention are Herrmann’s experimental, modernist score for The Devil and Daniel Webster and Shirley Walker becoming the first woman ever nominated in this category (there are not enough female composers in cinema and it’s a major problem).

Best Original Song

“Am I Blue?”, music by Harry Akst, lyrics by Grant Clarke, On with the Show! (1929)

“At Last”, music by Harry Warren, lyrics by Mack Gordon, Orchestra Wives

“Đàn Chim Di Cư (Migrating Flock of Birds)”, music by Phạm Hải Âu, lyrics by Lê Minh Hoàng and Đỗ Hoa Trà, Saigon in the Rain (2020, Vietnam)

“The Five Pennies”, music and lyrics by Sylvia Fine, The Five Pennies

“The Greatest Love of All”, music by Michael Masser, lyrics by Lila Creed, The Greatest (1977)

“(I’ve Got a Gal in) Kalamazoo”, music by Harry Warren, lyrics by Mack Gordon, Orchestra Wives

“Lullaby in Ragtime”, music and lyrics by Sylvia Fine, The Five Pennies

“The Name of the Game”, music by Benny Andersson, lyrics by Björn Ulvaeus and Stig Anderson, ABBA: The Movie

“No Time to Die”, music by Finneas, lyrics by Billie Eilish, No Time to Die (2021)

“Thank You for the Music”, music by Benny Andersson, lyrics by Björn Ulvaeus and Stig Anderson, ABBA: The Movie

Thank you to all those who participated in this year’s edition of MOABOS!

Best Costume Design

Michael Whittaker, The Black Rose (1950)

Howard Greer and Edward Stevenson, Carefree

Anthony Powell, Evil Under the Sun

Jean Louis, The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T

Malgosia Turzanska, The Green Knight (2021)

Ray Aghayan, Norma Koch, and Bob Mackie, Lady Sings the Blues

Trish Summerville, Mank

Motley (Sophie Devine), Orry-Kelly, and Charles Arrico, Oklahoma!

Gaston, Philippe, and Zanel, Princess Tam-Tam (1935, France)

Kristi Zea, Silverado

I was mulling between this and Evil Under the Sun for a long time, but which one was more memorable? Of course it had to be the film with the ludicrous “Happy Fingers” hat and whatever the hell else the cast wore in this film!

Best Makeup and Hairstyling

Mel Berns, Carefree

Ruth Pursley, Ray Romero, and Perc Westmore, Doctor X

Rey Medrano and Eileen Buggy,The Green Knight

Van Smith and Christine Mason, Hairspray

George Blackler, Dorrie Hamilton, and Stuart Freeborn, The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp

Ivar Hällqvist, Sture Höglund, and Gullan Westfelt, Loving Couples

Gigi Williams, Kimberly Spiteri, and Colleen LaBaff, Mank

Paulo Carias, O Ébrio (1946, Brazil)

Heba Thorisdottir and Janine Thompson, The Suicide Squad (2021)

Uncredited, The 3 Worlds of Gulliver (1961)

The two-strip Technicolor (an early form of Technicolor which brought out the reds and greens) really made Doctor X’s makeup look terrifically creepy. Outstanding work.

Best Production Design

Uncredited, Chess of the Wind

Anton Grot, Doctor X

Rudolph Sternad, Cary Odell, and William Kiernan, The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T

Vincent Korda and Julia Heron, Jungle Book

Alfred Junge, The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp

Arthur Schramm and Fritz Seyfried, Man on a Tightrope

Donald Graham Burt and Jan Pascale, Mank

George W. Davis and Lyle R. Wheeler, People Will Talk (1951)

William A. Elliott and Ida Random, Silverado

Emil Hasler, Otto Hunte, and Karl Vollbrecht, Woman in the Moon

Achievement in Visual Effects

The Black Rose

Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)

Grand Prix

Jungle Book

Malignant (2021)

No Time to Die (2021)

The Suicide Squad

Tenet (2020)

The 3 Worlds of Gulliver

Woman in the Moon

Worst Picture

Cult of the Cobra (1955)

Daleks’ Invasion Earth 2150 A.D. (1966)

Kissin’ Cousins (1964)

The Monster (1925)

On with the Show! (1929)

Plan 9 from Outer Space (1957)

Sanders of the River (1935)

The Senator Was Indiscreet (1947)

Two Rode Together (1961)

Honorary Award:

Paul Robeson, for his uncompromising artistry on and off camera

FILMS WITH MULTIPLE NOMINATIONS (excluding Worst Picture... 58) Eleven: The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp Nine: Elmer Gantry; Yi Yi Eight: The Devil and Daniel Webster Seven: Los tallos amargos Six: Chess of the Wind Five: The Bad Seed; The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T; Intruder in the Dust; Silverado; Woman in the Moon Four: ABBA: The Movie; Carefree; The Father; The Five Pennies; In the Heights; Mank; Minari; Oklahoma!; So This is Paris; The Stalking Moon Three: Adoption; Berlin: Symphony of a Great City; Doctor X; The End of Summer; Grand Prix; How to Steal a Million; Jungle Book; Loving Couples; Orchestra Wives; Sound of Metal; Take a Giant Step; To Each His Own Two: Batman: Mask of the Phantasm; The Black Rose; City Hall; Clue; The Dark Angel; Đoạn trường vinh hoa (The Glorious Pain); Down Argentine Way; Encanto; Evil Under the Sun; Fanchon, the Cricket; G.I. Blues; The Green Knight; Hairspray; The Joy Luck Club; Lady Sings the Blues; Licorice Pizza; Limite; Man on a Tightrope; The Mitchells vs. the Machines; No Time to Die; The Red Lily; Romance on the High Seas; 16 Days of Glory; Teen Kanya; West Side Story (2021)

WINNERS (excluding honorary awards and Worst Picture; 29) 4 wins: Yi Yi 3 wins: The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp 2 wins: Chess of the Wind; Elmer Gantry; Grand Prix; Intruder in the Dust; Los tallos amargos; Silverado; So This is Paris 1 win: The Bad Seed; Batman: Mask of the Phantasm; The Black Rose; The Devil and Daniel Webster; Doctor X; The Father; The Five Pennies; The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T; Godzilla vs. Kong; How to Steal a Million; Jazz on a Summer’s Day; Malignant; No Time to Die; Oklahoma!; Orchestra Wives; The Suicide Squad; Teen Kanya; Tenet; The 3 Worlds of Gulliver; To Each His Own; Woman in the Moon

100 films were nominated in 26 categories.

#My Movie Odyssey

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luciensfox · 4 years ago

Text

ACOSF Thoughts...

Don’t read unless you wish to be spoiled! Here are some things I can’t get out of my head after finishing the book...

Well first and foremost, I absolutely adore Nessian (as I always have but now it’s even more so) and I’m incredibly pleased with the direction it seems that SJM is leading Nesta’s character development! I’ve always wanted a badass warrior Nesta and I got way more than I figured (short of her growing wings at any time as I think some Valkyrie myths depict, this is amazing/ especially with all of the parallels people drew with her and Enalius). She’s going to make for an interesting character in the coming books and dare I say...commander Nesta. Oh, yes.

Of course I’ve always been obsessed with Lucien and nothing has changed on that front, but I’m even more intrigued now because we still need so many answers. When will it be revealed that he’s the heir of the Day Court? What’s the standings between he and Tamlin? With Vassa and Jurian? With his mother/ brothers? His mate? We literally got only two or three scenes with Luc involved so I knew nothing would be resolved in this novella, however I’m even more excited to see how Eris will play into his character arc come the next story (because you cannot convince me that SJM would put more emphasis on Eris than Lucien in this book and not intend for some brotherly angst in the future). Eris is also an anomaly and maybe it’s because I’m obsessed with the mysterious nature of whatever the hell is happening in the Autumn Court, but I really can’t wait to see what’s up with him and the rest of his family. (Also....the ballroom scene with Nest and Eris dancing to what is supposed to reflect Black Swan was one of my absolute favorite scenes.) Does Eris secretly desire peace and wants to take over Autumn not for power but to make amends and heal/ bring back glory to his home? And what exactly happened with Mor? SJM put so much emphasis on that too and we still have no idea.

I LOVE Gwyneth and Emerie. The triad of Valkyries was honestly the best part of the whole book for me. I know everyone is quick to match up characters with potential romances/ mates etc and it sounds like that’s what will happen with these two...but let’s not forget that they’re incredibly strong characters on their own terms and I hope whatever comes about their arcs isn't entirely placed on their romance status. However, they both seem to want to find someone to be with which leads me to believe that Emerie and Mor will very likely end up together (if only for the fact that we got one sentences indicating Em finds Mor gorgeous....I guess we’ll have to wait and see what happens) and that Gwyn is going to be a potential interest for Azriel.

I love Lucien so much, but my soft fox boy needs to heal and stop forcing himself to find romantic love when all he really needs is some self love. (So perhaps that will be his final journey....Lucien finally coming to terms with his trauma, settling ties with everyone from his past, and taking up his mental as Helion’s son and the future of the Day Court.)

Elain seemed a bit OOC...and yet not at all? We’ve only got the chance to see the “sweet/ innocent” side of her, but it makes sense that she’s going to be a super complex character (SJM wouldn't have set her up so mysteriously if the intent was to leave her as a mere gardener) and that her journey in following books will show us a side of her we’ve never encountered. The Elriel ship has always been a confusing one for me, not because I don’t ship it but because there’s so much happening all the time that it’s hard to get a proper read on clues when SJM throws characters like Gwyn at us...coupled with the fact that Lucien seems to still be in love with Elain (or at least he’s just lonely and doesn't know how else to react, never mind whatever is happening with Vassa and Jurian), and that Az seems intent on getting with Elain....but Az also seems to be the type of character who falls in love deeply without considering a number of things. He’s driven by his desires and often hurt by them, hence his love for Mor. Notice how shortly after he started drifting from his desire for Mor, he started to desire Elain? Part of me wonders if it’s because he found the person he’s meant to be with...or if he felt attracted to her and she was a distraction to his pain and a means to help him get over Mor. Like I said, I don’t know which way I lean just yet but these are all possibilities!

Then there’s the Gwynriel ship--totally didn’t see that coming but I can’t say I don’t enjoy it. I love how Gwyn teases Az in a way that many others usually don’t dare, and that she’s another character with a history outside of the IC. While there’s a lot to consider, like the fact that Az’s shadows shy away when Elain is around but “dance” and seem to be overjoyed when Gwyn is nearby, I think a truly noticeable parallel to the pairing could be this:

Azriel is no stranger to unrequited love. In fact, that seemed to be his overarching characteristic for the first two books. Now that he’s found Elain and she also reciprocates their shared desire, it would be easy to pair them together. However, Gwyn seems to be interested in Azriel and Az can’t seem to figure out his standings with her other than being enticed and not realizing what’s in front of him because he’s so determined to be with Elain since “she’s the third sister and he the third brother” etc so it must make sense somehow even though Elain is mated. But Gwyn, to that extent, is no stranger to unrequited love either.

Just imagine: Azriel finally cracks in the following book and shows a rare display of emotions to either Gwyn or the IC (or both) and Gwyn decides to confront him about facing his fears (his past with Mor, his current standings with Elain, his desire to have someone) by claiming that she knows exactly what unrequited love feels like because every day she stares at him and feels precisely as devastated as he did/does whenever he sees Mor or Elain. Az will probably be shocked to all hell and maybe it’ll snap him out of his misery enough to think clearly on the whole matter.

The Rhysand and Nesta friendship was something else I wasn’t expecting, didn’t necessarily think I’d want, but now am excited to see bloom. They definitely do share traits and I can’t help but remember how Rhys once compared Feyre to Cassian and how Nesta and Rhys might be the opposite counterparts since they’re both haughty and respond to things with incredibly heightened emotions because they love fiercely.

This post is much longer than I’d intended but oh well, some other things for your consideration.....

A Varian/Amren x Nessian double date.

Nesta taking on a similar military role as Cassian and either leading a female unit of Illyrians/ Valkyries or sharing the brunt of Cassian’s job (plus come on... those two training together is essentially their respective version of foreplay and I’m so here for warrior Nessian bonding).

I hope we get to see that mating ceremony scene!

Also....does anyone remember Balthazar--the Illyrian who showed up for one scene and fell asleep on Nesta’s shoulder during the Blood Rite while he helped them find shelter? There’s no way SJM would’ve written in a character like that without intending for him to show up again in the future....

Koschei the deathless? Wonder what will occur there.

Damn, if you’ve made it this far give yourself a pat on the back.

#I honestly was going to write one sentence #ONE #but then...this happened #I guess I just felt very strongly about this book and didn't realize it until now #god there are so many unanswered questions #time for fanfic i guess lol #nessian #a court of silver flames #acosf #acosf spoilers #sjm #elriel #gwynriel #lucien vanserra

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