#; but thank you anon that was a very interesting question!!!

[heesimp]

tasty (teaser) - heeseung

summary: it’s not your week and it doesn’t seem like the semester will ease up on you as time flies by, but your best friend is here to help in more ways than one.

word count estimate: 5.6K (891 for the teaser)

notes: let me know if you want to be tagged :) this is based off of a request an anon sent, so thank you anon! I’ll probably post it tonight or tomorrow. xx

warnings: reader touches herself, porn mentions, vibrator mention, phone sex, oral (f. receiving), dirty talking, mentions of heeseung with other girls, multiple orgasms, unprotected sex.

posted!

Heeseung isn’t shy about physical touch with you or anyone else. He’s the kind of guy girls feel comfortable around with just a few words spoken and you’ve always envied the way Heeseung can talk his way through anything. People love him, girls want to fuck him, and guys want to be like him. There’s a part of you that wishes you could exude the same aura that your best friend does but, unlike him, you cower at any chance of interaction and can’t seem to get anyone to be interested in you the way you’re interested in them. Heeseung has heard your fair share of love debacles whereas it seems like romance is presented to him with the snap of a finger. 

It isn’t that you haven’t had experiences with sex and dating, but they haven’t been worthwhile. So far, nobody has been memorable enough to keep in your backpocket for days like this, when you need a hot and erotic memory to come in an instant. It feels impossible to find guys who know what they’re doing when a woman is presented in front of them. Guys are so lucky because it takes next to nothing to get them hard and get them off. 

And like, your best friend has had his fair share of hookup stories that leave you wetter than a goddamn fountain. He’s not shy about skimping the details because he’s seen you cry snot since kindergarten and you’ve seen him eat shit on bicycles since elementary school. Sex isn’t off the table. You just don’t have anything to contribute and he doesn’t judge you for it. You aren’t really keen on telling him about all of the bad experiences you’ve had when he talks about how mind blowing sex for him is. Part of you is envious that your best friend has never had one bad day of sex in his life. Allegedly. 

Still, this frustration bubbles up and there’s nothing you can do to quell the way you feel. Perhaps it’s a mix of general life stress and the events leading up to this very moment. The entire day felt like a test to your patience as minor inconveniences piled up on top of one another before your breaking point. You thought your vibrator sitting uncharged was your last straw but it seems like your mind isn’t clear enough to focus on getting off. You recall a few unread text messages from Heeseung and open your shared text thread with him and watch all of the funny TikTok videos and tweets he sends you. You’re missing him right now. 

Heeseung answers after one ring. 

“Back from the dead, I see. What’s up?” 

You huff. “Nothing.” You hear him laughing from the other line. The faint sound of his keyboard clicking echoes in your ears. 

“Can’t be nothing. You always call me when you need to tell me something.” 

“Not true.”

“Y/N, you and I both know you prefer to talk on the phone when you have something important you need to say so neither of us ends up sending long voice memos.” Okay, he’s got you there. “So begs the question: What’s up?”

“Well I called you because I’m bored. Happy?”

Heeseung laughs again. You’re sure he can hear your disdain. “It’s a good thing I know how to deal with your attitude, huh? Since you’re bored, I’ll have you know you’re calling me while I’m playing with the guys.”

“What, no girl to hook up with?” 

“Not tonight, princess.” 

“How sad.” 

“If you must know why, I had a pretty long day at work but I’m fine now. Jake’s ass keeps dying so that’s pretty funny.” You don’t say anything, not right away. Not when you realize you called him in a haste and that you’re naked except for a tank stop and dainty white socks. The realization makes your cheeks heat up as you think about it, even though Heeseung can’t see what you’re wearing. “You good? You’re unusually quiet, especially when you give me attitude.” That makes you roll your eyes.

“You know, it’s unfair that all you have to do to get off is brush your hand against your dick.”

“Where’s this coming from? You don’t really talk about sex. Is everything alright?”

“It’s unfair!” He hears you groan in frustration. You’re somewhat annoyed he’s still typing away on his gaming keyboard.

“Y/N…Are you okay? What’s gotten into you?”

That question alone seems to ease your mind a little as your irritation bubbles over the surface. You couldn’t stop yourself from talking even if you tried. You tell Heeseung everything, good and bad, and he won’t relent until he knows you’re okay. But even this is treading into new territory. It isn’t that you haven’t noticed just how attractive your best friend has gotten since you met him for the first time as kids, but it’s the first time you’ve ever acknowledged it while talking to him. 

“I can’t get myself off.”

Your voice is barely above a whisper. You don’t hear the sound of his keyboard anymore.

“What?”

“Heeseung…”

“No, say it again.” 

Suddenly, you’re starting to regret calling him to complain about something like this. You feel like you might as well be diving into the depths of your secrets.

“I can’t get myself off.”

[itsrlymine]

Totally unrelated but, what's your ethnicity/nationality? There's literally 54 countries in Africa, this continent big asf.

Don't take this serious, but I just have an irrational annoyance from people saying "africa" like it's a country.

I'm from Mozambique, it's pretty rare to find people from African countries interested in new age spirituality. The only other African loa bloger that I know it's @konniesreality, who is from Cape Verde.

Also, how stressing is it to run a blog? Sometimes I feel like bloggers are wasting their precious time and efforts, the repetitive basic questions are beyond annoying and the hateful and rude anons don't help. How many times will they ask "can I manifest ...?" 💀, I swear to God, I just KNOW this question has been asked at least a 1000 times. AT LEAST!!

Amazing posts, by the way, I kinda like how you don’t follow any methods or techniques. At the end of the day, we only need our awareness and our abilities to choose what we want and decide that we have it.

(If you're not comfortable, you don't need to answer, these are personal questions, so I respect your privacy ♥)

Hello babe! I definitely understand you and don't like when people do that either. I just never felt like it wasn't important to specify since it doesn't have anything to do with manifesting. There is a youtuber by the name of Manifest It Finesse it and I'm pretty sure she is West African, though I don't remember which country. I'm from Nigeria. I'll check out her page.

For me, it hasn't been too stressful bc I decided it won't be lmao. I have gotten a thousand and one questions just like that and it's like omg you just want to complain fr. I manifested my blog going the way I wanted it it so it has been good aside from the very bored trolls. They don't mean shit tho. I cleared out my inbox for both reasons.

Thank you my love. I try to get people to understand that all you need is yourself and nothing else. No one else but you! Literally techniques don't matter bc you are the law itself.

[fortuneforsaken-if]

If 👏 you 👏 don't 👏 like 👏 it don't 👏 play 👏 it 👏

No one here is forcing you to omfg.

Jesus. What exactly is the point of coming onto a blog you very RUDELY state you aren't interested in... to tell us you aren't interested in it?

Do you want a medal?!

Ffs.

If people want an anti-hero, IF there are a lot of them, they can go search on interact IFs log. people can stop whining jesus christ.

I get it, really. It's frustrating MCs who have no control, but it's a journey MC won't be like that for the entire book! 😒 my main issue with books like that is only that for most of them, MC has no ally's, and some writers are like heavy on the MC abuse. I can think of two books off the top of my head i dipped out of because 6 chapters in and everyone is still horrible to MC including the ROs and MC is just a fucking doormat being ridiculed and punched down. In those instances, i don't blame the writers if thats the direction they want to go, but it makes me very uncomfortable, especially with immersion.

This, however, isn't that. IT'S NOT EVEN REALLY OUT YET. Anon wrote this to a writer with another blog where MC is going through some deep shit but not once have i felt that uncomfortable feeling because MC has hope and people that love them and i enjoy reading about their growth and pain.

Can we not judge things that has not even had a blog for 24 hours

Sorry for my rant, Tol... I'm just tired of seeing this shit constantly.

Promise i had a RO related question when i started this.... 🫣🤦🏻‍♀️

sometimes i think people forget that they're sending a message to a real human person, and it's pretty sad. if i ever acted like that towards anyone my grandma would come back to life and smack me over the head.

thank you for the sweet message!

[randomfoggytiger]

I did ask this to another blogger because I respect both of your viewpoints. I like hearing your analysis. I don't mean to send this to you also out of any disrespect.

OK..are Gillian and David really Mulder and Scully? Lack of communication that could clear up how they felt back in the days? He is like a little puppy and she is cold hard fierce who tries to shut off the world so she doesn't get hurt? No wonder they played those characters so well:) Thank goodness that THEY controlled the narrative to this discussion instead of having some kiss ass pompous interviewer trying to get them to truly talk about the tension so that we get "it was moist". Granted, that was a fun answer and brought out an interesting dynamic between the 2, but their frank and honest discussion is more true and loving. I love that D shared in the discussion and didn't take the interviewer seat like he has in the other podcasts. He actually participated in the real conversation and let it somewhat go in some areas naturally. Now, please, D or G, release the video so that we can see those lovely smiles and gazing eyes and, you know it happened, reaching out and touching each other.

I understand that completely, anon-- I used to (and still do) go to each inbox and ask the same question, even ones I'm principally against. Just want to know what they think, y'know?

Release the Gillian cut! XDDDD I don't think there is one; but maybe someone has clips on their phone of the two of them talking that day? That'd be fun.

You have a point, especially in the early days. David and Gillian were such young, green actors that Chris really had to cast for type.

But I WILL add: Half of the very close loved ones in my life are Gillian's (Gen X) generation, and the other half(ish) are David's (Boomer) or older. Each and every person I've talked to has said the same thing about the past: no one, and I mean no one, talked. Ever. Even in functional families; but especially in dysfunctional homes, with fragile mothers-- not without (varying) consequences. Communication was wired around what could be acceptably acknowledged without the whole house of cards tumbling down. Chris Carter slipped that into the themes of his show, too; and no wonder: his own childhood was turbulent, and communication a compoundingly fraught issue.

And I will also add, though I don't know how salient this point is: I have a Gen X mother who took one look at David, one look at Gillian, and a couple looks at their past interviews, and read them like a book. (So much so, that everything they admitted to in the podcast wasn't surprising, just confirming, for me.) I fed her bits of the Fail Better interview afterward, and she was nodding along to their interruptions and admittance that they had a hard time getting along-- she'd called that Gillian likely (accidentally) hurt David's feelings over the years unconsciously; and that DD grated on GA's nerves as much as she on his... and low and behold. But more importantly, she was nodding along to the communication issues section particularly: "Yes, that's how it was."

In short: I think Chris picked the people who could embody his characters' characteristics effortlessly. (But I also know, per his own words, that he cast for chemistry.) So, I agree¬.

What do you think, anon? :DDDDDD

Edit: Also agree concerning the pompous reporters. It was great to hear them without a third party trying to spin a narrative.

[bloggingboutburgers]

i hope that i'm not making any terrible cultural assumptions here, but i'm curious about your experiences as aro/ace in france in particular. the states are often very culturally conservative but especially when it comes to sex in particular. i don't know if it's just an incorrect cultural assumption on our part but the french are stereotyped as being a lot more open and in your face (?) about sex. is that true? does it make it harder for you to deal with people pushing the expectation of sex on you?

OK, so, I'm not sure I can 100% answer this one accurately because... Well, I've never properly LIVED in the States, only visited for a while each time, so I don't have a proper point of reference.

What I WILL say though is that most of our modern culture comes from us from the US. Movies, series, musicals, songs, social media conversations and stuff... And those ABSOLUTELY push the expectation of sex on people regardless of how conservative the States probably are on a daily basis.

I think it's like... The way I experience it, it kinda feels like the large majority of people regardless of the country or culture ARE kinda obsessed with sex anyway, so it's more about how overtly it's admitted in society or not. French people WILL definitely bring up sex in random conversations including at work or with people they've just literally met from the first time. (Depends on personality of course but... Yeah.) But I dunno. Maybe people in the US do that too. In terms of what I see in the exported culture though? The omnipresence of sex is definitely still felt. Heck, look at fandoms that are for a big part comprised of US people and how quickly they'll gravitate to shipping and sexual shipping or thirsting for a character too. That's definitely not just a thing I've observed in France.

The main difference I see is that most conversations of this type seem to start in the US and my country tends to "behind" in lots of ways, so it's definitely harder to talk about how you're an asexual in France still, at least I'd assume. Here we're still at the point where the odd mainstream media will write an article introducing asexuality as a revolutionary concept in a "can you believe this exists?" and "🫴🦋 is this a new trend?" kinda way. It's... A bit embarrassing, though it's way better than nothing at this point, progress is progress.

PS: The obsession with romance kinda seems to be everywhere in both cultures, so that at least doesn't make much of a difference. Except that I guess France being stereotyped as "the country of love" (read: ROMANTIC love ONLY) doesn't really help at all but meh.

[nightwonder7]

I run an IDV x reader writing blog and I wanted to ask, since you're someone I look up to, for tips regarding portraying the characters.

Oh gosh, I'm really flattered! ;A; It truly means a lot to hear that! O////////O I try my best to learn about the characters and their lore and use that to portray them in my work to the best of my ability. Of course, I'm by no means perfect, and I'm probably wrong about some things. I'll slip in my own interpretation and headcanons every now and then. Even exaggerate for comedic effect.

But enough rambling, onto the question! The best tip I can really give is to read up on lore; everything from B-day letters to deductions to diaries to trailers to descriptions on skins, accessories and stories; every piece of information gives a bit of insight to a character, and together they can create a picture (albeit not always complete. That's where headcanons and theories come in to fill in the blanks). I find even events can tell a bit more about a character. Just soak it all up. The Wiki has been my best friend in learning IDV lore, even though I've heard it might not have all the info there is, but you can come a long way with it.

Analyses and theories people put out can also give great insight and provide different points of view. They have been really helpful for me in learning more about the characters, especially with trailers since I find them to be a little too poetic for me to understand sometimes ghfjdskgfds it's also good if you have someone to discuss these matters with.

Of course, the more invested you are in a character, the easier it is to learn about them. It is totally okay to stick with only a very few you like; the most important thing is that you're having fun! And you can always ask friends who are invested in other characters to help you out writing those. From my experience, they're usually happy to talk about their blorbos. Combined we are experts XD

And once you've gathered information, use it to answer questions like "What would they do in such and such situation?", "Do they prefer X, Y or Z?", "How would they interact with this character under these circumstances?" etc etc. Depending on what you're writing. Often times for me, however, my brain just comes up with scenarios by itself fdshjfgdsj

Gosh, this got a lot longer than I expected pfff But yeah, this is how I go about portraying characters; read about them and then apply what I've learned. I hope this helps! And like I said, the most important thing is to have fun with it, so don't worry about not writing a character perfectly. Every interpretation is different, and that's totally fine!

[inkykeiji]

Ehmm hello! I don't know if I can ask this but how do you see akutagawa in a romantic relationship? What kind of boyfriend would he be hehe. I'd just like to hear your thoughts and headcanons on him , I guess. Thanks in advance and sorry for my English, it's not my mother tongue

hi hi!! you’re totally allowed to ask that! i don’t take requests, but i do welcome suggestions/prompts, and while i don’t answer all of them, any of the ones that make my brain n heart go !!!!!!!!!! get stashed and stored safely in my drafts hehe c: 

AH okay i am in love with this question!!! i have many, many thoughts on this topic hehe <33

warnings: toxic traits/relationship, mention of rough sex and kinks at the end (marking, dom/sub dynamic, dacryphilia, degradation + dumbification, etc).

words: 1.9k of me literally rambling about aku

akutagawa in a relationship is very interesting because i think there’d be multiple layers to the whole thing; it would be quite complex! i also don’t think a 100% healthy relationship is possible with him, for reasons i’ll get into below! 

and of course, keep in mind, these are just my personal opinions and interpretations of him!

𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐢𝐧 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥: 

- at the beginning, he is awkward, clumsy, and standoffish. these are all very new, very intense feelings for him, and while he likes them—likes the way warmth seethes pleasantly in his chest whenever you smile at him or call him baby, likes the way his ribs expand with bubbles of sunshine whenever you gaze at him with such pure, potent adoration—they do still frighten/unnerve him to an extent, and he does not know how to properly express + process these emotions of lust and love and compassion. as such, he truly doesn’t know how to act in a romantic relationship, and will most likely end up unintentionally stepping on your toes or hurting you with his actions and his words, purely out of ignorance. he’d feel horribly guilty for these mess-ups, and would learn from them extraordinarily quickly (could also see him researching relationship things on like, google or something lmao). 

*a side note here: i believe when akutagawa feels, he feels very intensely; he is apathetic towards a lot of things, but when his emotions sprout, they fucking surge, they take over his body and invade his mind, they are extremely powerful and he cannot ignore them, though he can sometimes reign them in enough to get shit done and momentarily dull them to a constant tugging at the back of his mind

- the possibility of him unintentionally hurting you with his words is particularly large, considering he is incredibly blunt and says exactly what he thinks and means without any regard for the feelings of others. he is extremely honest, and he doesn’t ever sugarcoat his words. the fact that he is quite logical and technical in his thinking patterns only adds to this and his emotional ineptness.

- he is selfish! he feels very possessive and protective over you, well past the point of normal or healthy. it almost bleeds into yandere territory; he’s greedy with you and will get jealous extremely easily, extremely quickly. he likes to know where you are at all times, whom you are with, and when you’ll be back, and you can expect constant texts from him while you’re out. 

- on that note, once he finally comes to terms with his feelings for you and fully accepts them, he will be incredibly clingy in both the literal and metaphorical sense of the word. 

- he doesn’t like your friends. in fact, he doesn’t like anyone who gets to spend time with you and takes you away from him for even a few moments. he is generally cold towards the friends he plainly dislikes and downright hostile towards the ones he hates, the ones who cause his envy to flare and sprout talons and claw at his ribs, the ones he disapproves of, as well as previous exes, if you have any. he genuinely does not see anything wrong with this behaviour and truly believes himself to be doing the ‘right’ thing and what’s best for you (and he knows what’s best for you better than you do, duh).

- he’s touch-starved, and at the beginning any sort of skinship makes him flinch—not because he doesn’t like it (he very much does), but because it’s quite new and unfamiliar to him. he wouldn’t be incredibly interested in PDA, partially because he’s shy and partially because he thinks that’s special and private and just for the two of you to experience, but you can expect his hands on you, or his body touching you, somewhere, someway, all the time when you’re out and about. this could manifest as a hand resting on your lower back, just above the swell of your ass; or an arm twined tightly around your waist, large palm resting on your hip, wrist curled around you; or his thigh slotted up against yours at any event; or his ankle linked with yours beneath the table at a dinner; or your pinkies intertwined; etc.. he just likes to be touching you in these small, soft, subtle ways; it makes him feel calm, it makes him feel grounded, and it makes him feel like he’s visually staking his claim on what’s his for everyone in the immediate vicinity to see without drawing too much attention to himself.

- his starkly defined black-and-white philosophies are immovable and unbreakable, and he holds steadfast to his world views. to me, this steadfast devotion would bleed into other important areas of his life, such as a romantic relationship, which means that he would be incredibly loyal and faithful to you. he’s with you for life, through thick and thin, no matter how angry you make him or how many fights you have, he will not let go of you, and he will always, always defend you against others (aka he’s the only one allowed to criticize you lmao). he may be the mafia’s dog, but he’s your fucking dragon (ew cheesy as heck i know!!! but it’s true!!!).

- he definitely gets in Moods. sometimes you’ll be able to offset these Moods or dispel them (ie. the way gin did with tea n figs), but there will be times where you just have to accept that he’s in a Mood and leave him be. 

- on that note, he genuinely does value his space and his alone time. this is of utmost importance to him and he needs you to understand that, as well as understand that it’s nothing personal. he is an introvert in all respects and doesn’t really enjoy being in big crowds or conversations, or loud and hyper spaces. this is just another inherent trait to who he is; he needs his own space to recharge, even from just you. 

- his moral compass exists in some vague form, but it is extremely weak. he will take disproportionate revenge on anyone he believes has wronged you. 

- he most definitely holds heavy respect for you and holds you in high esteem, but i don’t think he’d think of you as his equal, necessarily. he’d probably consider you to be ever-so-slightly below him; someone who is strong, but needs his guidance and control. someone who would do satisfactorily on their own, but does even better with him. it is because of this that he doesn’t feel inferior to you, irregardless of the fact that he feels inferior to those above him (and, deep inside, himself). 

- he’d hate you trying to take care of him when he’s sick or when he’s experiencing a particularly acute flare-up of symptoms, because it makes him feel weak. as far as he’s concerned, it should be him taking care of you, always.

𝐢𝐧 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐬’ 𝐟𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬:

- he has a hair-trigger temper, and you will have to learn how to expertly avoid not tripping it up at any given moment, not accidentally snapping that thin thread. this will take some practice and trial and error, but the thing about akutagawa is that while he is quick to anger and give into the sharp flashes of fury in his chest, he is also fairly easy to calm, as long as the offense wasn’t a serious one. this may just be me thinking wishfully HEHE but i do think that his temper would be subdued by and dulled down in your presence because he truly doesn’t want to get angry at you, hates hurting you over inconsequential things, but has severe difficulty controlling his wrath. this is something i think he’d attempt to work on for you.

- he is extremely stubborn and resilient, especially when it comes to his own personal views, beliefs, ideals, and opinions, and this makes me think he would be absolute hell to be in a fight with because of his sheer willpower; he just absolutely will NOT give up. if he genuinely and wholeheartedly believes he’s right about something, his belief will be unshakable. he’s right, you’re wrong, no ifs, ands, or buts about it. as such, he won’t let things go, especially if you haven’t given into him yet and agreed with him, meaning he will continue to pick at and pull at and press the issue until you really snap, break into pieces and allow him to put you back together his way, the right way. 

- he holds grudges. he will, without a doubt, bring up your past mistakes committed against him—things he knows you feel awful about—and wield them as emotional and psychological weapons in a fight, irregardless of how long ago those mistakes were made, irregardless of if you thought the two of you had forgiven and moved past the issue. he plays dirty, and he doesn’t care; it’s all about him winning, him coming out on top, him proving that he was correct all along. he’ll use anything at his disposal to do so. 

- he won’t compromise, either. i genuinely think this is just one of his toxic traits, a flaw inherent to who he is as a person, and it’s pretty much non-negotiable. it’s a harsh truth you’d have to accept if you were to date him.

- on the contrary, very rarely, he may back down if his views on the topic or issue at hand have not yet been fully solidified. but once they are, there’s no changing them. 

𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐝𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐦:

- he fucks viciously, hips pounding hard and rough and fast, with such force that they shove your body up the mattress with each snap, his hipbones slapping your skin so hard it causes your flesh to ripple. he’s always leaving marks across your body, too; with the harsh drag of his teeth over your neck and collarbone and shoulder, or the sharp sinking of his nails and fingertips into your hips and thighs, marring your skin with crops of red streaks and rapidly developing smudges of navy and violet. there’s definitely an element of sadism here but it isn’t nearly on the level of, say, dazai’s sadism.

- i think akutagawa is a dom-leaning switch. he doesn’t like to be told what to do unless it is from a VERY specific person. otherwise, he likes to be in charge, not because he necessarily has those dom caretaker urges but simply because he likes to be The Boss; he likes to have all of the power and the control over you and your body.

- we know he isn’t fond of meaningless torture (which is why i don’t think he’s as sadistic as dazai), however i think his sexual punishments would be absolutely fucking brutal (because these are not meaningless; these have a very important, very specific purpose, in his mind).

- he really enjoys praise and admiration; he wants to hear how good he’s doing, how good his cock feels, how pretty it is, how much you love it, etc.. such compliments tug the most gorgeous little whines from the back of his throat, and are often followed by a jagged growl of more or again.

- his favourite kinks include: marking, bondage, breathplay, cumplay, impact play, dacryphilia, degradation + dumbification (HEAVY), discipline/punishment, cock worship, praise, dry humping, power play (bdsm dom/sub dynamics), orgasm control, and humiliation!

[triglycercule]

I need to ask the mtt expert, do you think any of the murder trio would be religious?

ooooof this is a hard question to answer because personally i dont practice any religions specifically so i cant exactly offer the best answer to this DXXXX but i'll TRY. take everything i say with the fattest grain of salt. imagine the grain of salt is a salt lamp because i genuinely dont know that much about religion and belief

so i guess the first thing to consider is sans undertale since he's the one that all the mtt originate from. i dont think sans canonically is religious like at all. so if i wanted to take the easy route i COULD just says sans doesn't worship anything so its unlikely that any of the mtt would. but i wont because i have honor. i doubt that any of our surfaceworld religions wouldve made it into the underground since theyve been seperated from humanity for a long ass time. and i think undertale has its own belief based on the delta rune anyways so im gonna stick to that since it seems more plausible than just saying that dust is a hardcore buddist or something

for horror my answer like hell no. he mightve prayed for the angel described in the delta rune to save horrortale or something but i think those are just like desperate times call for shitty tries for ANYTHING to work. he literally describes horrortale as "living in a place like this is like living through an eternal hell" and i think that being in a place like horrortale would kill anyone's hope for some sort of angel to save them. plus i think he's too aware of the issues going on in horrortale to try and put his faith into something that doesn't exist AND also he wouldn't use religion as a moral guide. considering that he literally said in the horrortale flash game that he's "given up on figuring out what's right and what's wrong" (my king with an absolutely terrible moral compass LET'S GOOOOOO) (i love the horrortale flash game. i even have the quote saved because its such a good and important line for horror)

as for dust i think there's more of a possibility of him being religious (undertale delta rune based religion not any of the real world ones). the delta rune says that an angel who has seen the surface will descend from above and bring us freedom OR a harbinger of destruction as the angel of death, waiting to free monsterkind from this mortal realm. mostly gerson's words i stole this from the wiki because i cant be bothered to play undertale more than once. when translating dust's canon fics SPECIFICALLY the one called "a true hero appears" the topic of dust "liberating" the monsters of the underground and "granting their wish" to be free (even though he himself doesn't believe in the underground ever being free especially while hes in the middle of his "mad time") comes up. i dont think dust views himself as an angel at ALL like described in the prophecy but he could view himself as a "savior" type of person. it could be a really coincidental coincidence or it could be dust deciding to take up the role of the angel except a really really shitty one out of a desperate try for something to help like i mentioned with horror earlier. if we're going this route then him taking up the role of the angel could provide a sense of comfort that religion does and also shape his moral compass (i keep bringing these 2 things up because idrk why people worship. so i researched why so i can better support my arguments!!) with all the salvation liberation bullshit. personally i dont think that dust would exactly believe in himself as THE delta rune angel but more of just some sort of rouge savior but the possibility of going in a more delta rune religious way IS there

killer is in a completely different situation than dust and horror here (i'm not like the rest of yall ahh. get back in the original fishbowl you goldfish fuck) because he's AWARE of what arguably could be considered god in an utmv context. and obviously that's US the creators (players in his eyes. smh dont you know i havent played undertale in forever. i needa go back and do a true pacifist run. i did neutral because im shit at dodging attacks. but call me a CREATOR you second dimensional FUCK. you are a lower concept than me call me by a name i DESERVE) because for some reason and i completely forgot why he's aware of the creators. i think this could go in maybe two different ways where since killer is very much so aware that there are millions of gods(/creators. every one of us that creates something for utmv is a god in their multiverse LMAOOO) out there that he could completely just avoid religion itself since the usual reasons of comfort and moral alignment are completely debunked and pointless once you know that the gods that you could believe in just view you as code or characters to play around with. no comfort or morals to align with there. OR it could go in another direction where since killer is aware of the creators that he actually does end up worshiping SOME sort of us-based religion??? (what would that be called. do you think that theres a religion for all the self aware utmv characters who believe in creators. creatism. creationism. idk but would ink be the leader of that??? prophet type ass guy for creatism. this would be a cool concept someone else steal this from me and make a cooler story with it.) anyways i got side tracked. doesn't killer already believe that he has to do things that the creators want or something??? which COULD provide the moral compass part of religion. its definitely not a good moral compass but whatever killer believes his god wants of him he'll do. and also it might provide some sort of nihilistic depressive comfort knowing that everything is out of his hands and predetermined by a higher being. he already has that whole "lowly servant who'll do whats ordered of him" type shit going on. not unlikely that that could apply to the creators (or chara possibly. that relationship would be interesting if killer viewed them as a god and worshipped them as such. HM.)

anyways those are my thoughts on if i think the murder time trio would be religious. this was actually way longer than i expected but maybe thats just because i ramble a lot and have a lot of side thoughts. PERSONALLY i dont think any of them would worship a god just because i dont practice any religion and it makes it easier for me to characterize them without the religious barrier there. but also i do think there are possiblities of the trio all believing in a god (with horror maybe hopelessly believing the in the delta rune, dust becoming a delta rune esque figure, and killer's entire schtick with knowing about creators) but everyone has their own fanon interpretations on these characters!!! so if you wanna make them believe in religion or something then go then ahead and do that. maybe those possible points i brought up where they could worship a god will inspire someone or something idk. triglycercule OUT (off to reread horrortale for the 20th time today)

[zhongrin]

being from dragonic lineage, do your kids age differently/slower than other kids? do they live longer? do they have any particular affinity for geo like their father?? augh i love ur kids (that sounds a little odd but i mean it in the normalest way possible, i swear-)

- sachie

hmm.... technically, their 'human' form is them shapeshifting (they still have full dragon noodle forms but i'd like to think shifting into human forms came to them naturally because they do have human blood from my side). hence, i think they would 'grow up' at a normal rate in terms of their human appearance because 1) zhongli teaches them to and 2) they do go to school and play with other kids their age, meaning they would observe their peers and notice their growth, so they'll unconsciously do the same to their appearance.

but yes, they do live longer ;w; ....... when i feel evil i imagine a future where i die of old age and them having to cope with that kind of impactful loss for the first time. bonus imagine of zhongli having to bear the burden of me passing away AND the making sure the kids deal well with grief ˙ᵕ˙ /smacks myself

as for geo element affinity, i answered it here but tldr version is: yes i believe they would be able to wield the geo element :3

[hadesknockedupintheunderworld]

Oh ho ho what a highly interesting question, anon👀

(Answered under the cut because it's a bit long)

ㅤ

Before I give my proper answer, allow me to explain a bit of my interpretation of Tails. I actually see him as a sort of naturally jealous person with some innate possessive tendencies who has grown used to curbing these tendencies of his, which he had to do due to a number of factors.

One major reason is due to Sonic himself. To me Sonic has always had a complicated relationship with different kinds of love or attraction (and I do see him as on the aro/ace spectrum). So, when absolute strangers (or those he doesn't particularly like) obsessively pursue him for clear romance/possessive reasons, he tends to react with strong rejection or indifference, in contrast to how he welcomes ego stroking and praise from those who can be merely categorized as "fans" (or those he does particularly like). To me, Tails' initial admiration and pursuit of joining with and becoming like Sonic very well parallels how Amy Rose began to admire and pursue a romantic relationship with Sonic. Even if we consider that Sonic did save Tails that one time from being bullied (according to Sonic Prime and a new animation for Sonic 2 present in Sonic Origins), his pursuit of trying to work together with his hero (which is detailed a bit more in the jp manual for Sonic 2, and includes Tails going so far as to follow after Sonic everywhere and modify Sonic's plane) really isn't any more "normal" than how Amy begins to pursue a romantic relationship with her hero after Sonic saves her from Metal Sonic. The only real differences here were that Amy was explicitly pursuing romance, and that Sonic rejected Amy's advances but eventually took Tails on as his sidekick/little buddy.

This is also not to mention the implications here and there in what we can find of Sonic and Tails' backstory that Sonic would continue to run away and pretend he did not care, while secretly keeping an eye out for Tails.

And beyond that, as one of Sonic’s oldest friends, Tails gets to spend a lot of time around Sonic, and gets to see firsthand how he reacts to romantic prospects, his complicated relationship with "love" as a concept, and is present as Sonic’s group of friends steadily grows.

With all of that, I at least see Tails learning to deal with his innate jealousy and possessiveness so

Sonic doesn’t reject him

Because he doesn't want to keep Sonic from pursuing relationships with others

And for the sake of one's image/being a good person

If Tails has learned that confessing and making his romantic intentions clear could lead to Sonic rejecting him or it ruining their friendship (since he's seen first hand how Sonic has reacted in certain cases to love confessions or overt romantic affection), it makes sense to me that he would try to hold his feelings back (both those that are not squarely platonic and are explicitly romantic and/or sexual). And when it comes to Sonic, there's a guilt factor and an impossibility factor when it comes to keeping him from other people. Not only would Tails feel at least a little bad for restricting him, but Sonic does not respond well to being controlled. Now of course, how he reacts does depend on the time of his life and who it is, but there is nevertheless a futility in trying to control Sonic "I have no master except the wind that blows free" Hedgehog. And finally, my view on both Sonic and Tails, well... I believe that image and visual alignment is a big thing for these two, and that the two are secretly more...in the gray (or at least, that they're surprisingly immoral so to speak). In their origins to me, Tails is just a kid, minding his business, who does not inherently seek to hurt others (though his faith in those around him does matter), and Sonic is just a kid, free as the wind, who doesn't particularly care about being a good guy, but loves the attention. Essentially, though he does save some people on whim, the idea is that Sonic originally fights Robotnik simply because the Doctor, his machines, and his pollution have such a negative effect on his home. So beyond this point, he fights as a hero both out of interest of having his home intact/being alive, and because (simply put) he likes what comes from being considered a hero (all the praise and perks). And so because Sonic is someone that Tails admires, because Sonic has to uphold a baseline image or reputation so he can still be considered a hero/good guy, Tails becomes accustomed to doing the same. That's a bit of an oversimplification (how I see them and why is the subject of a proper essay about that), but the point is that Tails is also conscious that trying to overtly control or manipulate Sonic would not objectively be considered "hero or good guy behavior", especially if it goes too far.

And so with all of that plus the fact that Sonic has never seemingly accepted anyone's romantic inclinations or dated anyone, Tails curbs his natural inclination towards jealousy and possessiveness so he can be content enough to be at Sonic's side. Perhaps there are more friends Sonic is going to get, people he's going to show an interest in, but Tails can put stock in the fact that it's unlikely that Sonic will date anyone. Plus, even if that somehow does happen, Tails is largely fine as long as he's guaranteed to be by Sonic's side no matter what. So as long as he can be with Sonic forever, no matter their relationship, he's as content as can be.

ㅤ

But then Sonic starts dating Nine, right?

And hahaha don't get me wrong here. Tails is pretty practiced. He's not gonna blow up or anything.

But once he gets past the initial shock of that being true, I think he just feels jealous and conflicted by default. I mean, he's just been accepting that there's no hope of ever being in that kind of relationship with Sonic. And not only has someone gone and done it, it's not just anyone.

It's a version of him.

And if a version of himself managed to do it (a version of himself who once lashed out at and fought against Sonic no less), then what does that mean about him? Does it mean that there's something about Nine Sonic likes better? Does it mean that he's had this entire situation wrong? Does it mean he lost his chance and he'd been so afraid for nothing? Does it mean that he could have had that this whole time?

And that's not to mention navigating this. Even if I believe Sonic is very very capable of having multiple best friends or even partners, it's only natural for Tails to get a little afraid of being replaced (especially if he learns that Sonic also considered/considers Nine as a best friend also)

But Tails is the type to not want to burden Sonic with all of this while becoming increasingly more worried. And although he would naturally have a complicated relationship with Nine, I still think he would generally like him and not want to take out his feelings on him. So with that being said, I think he'd sort of try to hold it in and act normal while really not acting all that normal, because though he could hide his feelings better if he wanted to, he still kind of lets it slip because he kind of does want to talk to Sonic about it or let his feelings be known.

I think that whenever Sonic eventually does see that Tails is acting a bit off he'll eventually talk to him about it or try to get him to, but, honestly, even if Sonic could say things (true things) that would make him feel better, I don't think Tails could be as content as he would be if it was idk... Knuckles or Shadow or what have you. Because if it was anyone else, Tails could be more content knowing that his relationship with Sonic is special and that he'll always be by his side, even if he's dating someone else.

But with the fact that the person that Sonic has chosen to date is another version him—a version of him which Sonic has also kind of clearly developed a similar "best friendship" with? I feel that even if Sonic tries to reassure him, Tails will forever be plagued with bitter and jealous feelings. Even if he'd never force Sonic to stop dating anyone, much less force him to date him, I don't think he can even really feel content here unless Sonic chooses to date him also if that makes any sense.

So, yes. That's my answer. Tails would try to be really good about it, but he's still bitter and annoyed and jealous and wondering if he's enough or has been doing something wrong. He's wondering why it couldn't have been him. And he won't be able to just be content at Sonic's side if he can't also be with Sonic. So while I can't say how long it will take, something will have to give eventually. I think at some point in their future, Sonic will have to tackle his specific feelings for Tails and they'll have to talk about their specific relationship, especially if he's dating Nine right in front of him.

[muppetminge]

May I ask what do radfems think about men wearing makeup? Or alternative subcultures where makeup is considered androgynous? For example goth and emo come to mind as quite common ones?

(I know you can't speak for everyone, but I've seen you post about makeup before)

i don't really have much opinion on men wearing make-up tbh (much as i don't re any individual women). the mechanisms behind it aren't the same, so it's not really comparable. there's no widespread social push for men to wear make-up, they're not being considered unprofessional or nonformal or underdressed for not wearing it. no one's arguing with a guy that he has to wear make-up for this and that occasion. men aren't being marketed it constantly. you don't have to look far and wide to to find a barefaced man in media (or, indeed, on the street). any obstacles a man might face due to wearing make-up is an entirely different (and here largely irrelevant) conversation (though of course still linked to misogyny + homophobia). in theory degendering make-up would be a positive, though i don't see that happening any time soon - and even then it would have to be achieved by more women actively not wearing make-up, not a handful of guys doing it.

i do think there's a certain disctinction to be made between 'everyday'/natural make-up and alt make-up, but not a giant one. it's still not particularly healty. it's also a misnomer to call make-up androgynous in most (if not all) of these subcultures imo - both the extent and styles differ, and it's still more women wearing it than men. the average emo guy is not spending the same amount of effort on make-up as his female counterpart. natural make-up is definitely worse in this regard, but i still think there's something inherently alienating about covering up your own face near-constantly.

it does discern itself slightly in that alt culture is obviously about rejecting social norms (while beauty culture is about following them), but it's naive to act like beauty culture isn't still influencing alt norms to a big degree. nothing exists in a vacuum. just because you're not following the trends doesn't mean you're not taking the ideas behind them in. alt makeup can still be about covering up 'blemishes', trying to achieve the appearance of a certain facial structure, etc - striving after a certain beauty norm, in short. cultural norms in alt spaces are still influenced by general cultural norms (i'd also argue that a lot of the trends aren't actually that different). they're not particularly less mysogynistic. (there's also something to be said about the commodification of alt cultures, but i won't get into that here.)

i'll acknowledge that the expression is different, though, and i do think there's more weight to the self-expression angle here. overall i do actually prefer seeing more 'out-there' as opposed to 'natural' make-up. there's something more active about it, in that you're not just playing along with the expected. no one's being coerced into doing corpse make-up or whatever. it's more conscious. i am a big fan of originality, of breaking norms, of not playing along, and of breaking trends. take that how you will.

tl;dr i don't think either have big enough societal influences to really matter in the big picture. while interesting, all of this is a minority of cosmetics use, and a fringe group of beauty culture as a whole. they're truly a drop in the ocean. thank you for the question.

[decidedly-not-heterosexual]

Do you Will changed Hannibal more than Hannibal changed Will? I ask this because Hannibal got Will to open up his person suit after s2 but Will made Hannibal so much more human especially in s3 . That man went to prison for the first time, he took a bullet for someone, he made a human heart, did a massacre for Will 😭😭😭

Hi Anon!

Yes, I totally think Will changed Hannibal more than Hannibal changed Will.

At the start of the show, Will enjoys killing, doesn't admit it to himself, and doesn't want to be a killer.

At the end of the show, Will enjoys killing, does admit it to himself. and doesn't want to be a killer.

By the end Will has killed for pleasure when unnecessary (and defiled corpses, lmao). Yet Will still doesn't want to be a killer. He's partially submitted to his nature, but he kills himself and Hannibal rather than embracing his full "becoming.

I agree with the interpretation outlined in this delicious meta post. Will's internal conflict is about him enjoying killing and being capable of killing innocents, yet not wanting to be a killer.

Hannibal, meanwhile, has prized his freedom and artistry above all else. He's always been chaotic and risk-taking. But he truly cares about Will, like he truly cares about Mischa. These are the two people who change him, whether or not he admits it to himself. (By saying "I love Will. I have to eat him," Hannibal admits that the change is too big and terrifying for Hannibal. Hannibal has to love Will in a way that Hannibal understands).

*Note that I've only seen the show once so I'm sure there are aspects I've missed that would impact this question.

Thank you for the question!!

[violinist-rachel]

Hi so Rachel whats your thoughts on kurt cobain? Singer of nirvana and guitarist

"I haven't listened to a lot of their songs, but I know many people who really enjoyed them, and I think it's very sad how he passed. As someone who never got fully comfortable being in the limelight, I can understand how stressful it can be."

"Loss like that can be extremely difficult for everyone around them, though. More than anything, I hope they were able to find some peace with it overtime."

[voidzphere]

what are your opinions on Underlust?

the au itzelf, big nnooo. no. juzt. no. the characterz suck too but i 'preciate the gang out there revampin em 🙏🙏

[sportsthoughts]

Sorry if I missed this lore drop previously, but how'd you get into the Pens? I love your gifs and positivity that you bring to the lb!

Buckle up anon. I thought about one line answering this but I enjoy the phrase 'lore drop' so much I think you deserve the deep dive. It'll take a while to get to the pens but you asked for lore so...

I have been sportsthoughts on tumblr since 2015 ish - maybe slightly earlier - and this has always been a sportsblr/sports rpf-y type blog in various iterations.

This blog was originally used for liveblogging UK Premier League and La Liga football matches. I have always been a huge football fan (my childhood team is Arsenal - north London forever ❤️ etc etc) and when I moved away to university at 18 none of my new friends were into sports and I really missed watching games with my family.

Finding other likeminded fans online who were also watching games and liveblogging them was such a beautiful experience and I have amazing memories of 2015-2018ish when I was a very active football blog, spent a lot of the time in the Arsenal/FC Barcelona communities here and had some beautiful trips to Barca.

I do have a sideblog where I still dabble in that space but in truth I very rarely liveblog football anymore because nowadays it's returned to being something I watch with friends and family so I'm not on my phone during games.

Here's where the pens come in - sort of. I've scrolled back through my AO3 bookmarks and can see in 2015 I also got into sports RPF for the first time. There are some incredible football RPF fics out there (let me know if you'd like some recs!). Somehow - probably through raiding people's bookmarks - in early 2015 I ended up reading a Sid/Geno fic called And Never Been Kissed and I was absolutely hooked. At the time of reading this I had:

1. Never watched a game of hockey in my life (side note, I don't think I can understate how little hockey coverage there is in the UK. Even the most ardent sports fan would probably not be able to name a single NHL player or team. Not even Sid! Not even Gretzky!)

2. I had no idea, nor any desire to look up who these people actually were. It was just like reading really well written original fiction.

For the next 7 years I thoroughly enjoyed hockey RPF and created (in my mind) entire personalities and appearances for Sid and Geno, along with all the other 'characters I came across regularly in hockey fic. Sid, I got pretty close to the mark. Geno, not so much. One day I will try and find some reference pictures for what I thought they looked like because it’s quite hilarious. When I re-read fics I love from during that time I laugh because I remember my Sid and Geno and how different they were from reality.

So, hockey was sort of in my life from 2015 but exclusively in the form of fics. I would scroll through the actual hockey bits of works because I didn’t understand the rules and why every single fic was an AU where professional sports people were allowed to fight each other mid game.

At this point I’d left university, and because I no longer liveblogged football games, I found I really missed sports fandom. Another sport I grew up watching and loving was Formula 1 so when lockdown hit in March 2020 I started liveblogging F1 races to pass the time (and still do sometimes - now over on @vroomlive). I loved/still love F1blr, but it didn't quite fill my fandom itch because:

1. We joke about it, but F1 is a deeply unserious sport run by a dire organisation (Liberty Media). They change the rules every week and it's managed badly to the point of being comical. There have been a few major cock ups over the years (including the 2021 championship literally being taken away from the rightful winner and given to someone else. To put this in hockey terms: imagine a completely valid goal being overruled in the last 5 minutes of the Stanley Cup final and then the ref deciding to give the other team a 5 on 3 powerplay Just Because) all of this is quite disheartening for long term fans - and has resulted in quite a fractured and angsty fandom.

2. There are only about 20 F1 races a year - so it's just not a sport that's on regularly. I love sports, and I want to watch sports all the time - so a sport that only gave me content every third weekend or so just wasn't really enough for me.

At this point, when I was feeling rather sports fandom bankrupt, the wonderful work of Sid/Geno writers and the influence of the tumblr dashboard converged. I worked this out by scouring my AO3 bookmarks - in April 2021 I read a Sid/Geno fic called Game Plan that I fell head over heels for. I’m still not quite sure what about this fic grasped me so deeply but I started reading a lot more hockey RPF.

Around the same time an F1 blog I followed started posting about Mat Barzal All. The. Time. I had no interest in this man and did not know he was a hockey player but over the course of about a year I became vaguely exposed to hockey content on Tumblr through that blog, and at some point in early 2022, saw Sid on my dash for the first time. I don’t remember the exact post but I remember seeing the name, doing a double take and thinking oh Shit! That’s Sidney Crosby from fanfiction! I was flabbergasted because in my mind Sid was in his early 20s tops, so seeing this early thirties, bearded, fat bottomed man on my dash and realising that that was Sid was such a shock. 

My hockey lurker era lasted from mid 2022 to early 2023 and I spent a lot of time, um, lurking. That sounds so creepy. I suppose I had never thought about actively joining a fandom before because my fandom engagement (one direction > football > f1) had all happened really organically so actually choosing to join a space as an adult was quite an interesting process.

By summer of 2023 my husband’s job changed again meaning he works away from home most weeknights and suddenly my late nights were extremely free because I’d hang out with friends and then go home at 10/11 to an empty house which I hated. I really found myself wanting to make fandom friends and have an at home hobby I could do late at night before going to bed so taking on a sport that happened 12am-2am (timezones!) seemed like a good fit. 

Alongside this on a totally separate track was my longstanding interest in fandom - most of my professional work/research is pretty standard psychotherapy stuff but I’ve done a little bit of work over the last few years looking at sex therapy (not as sexy as it sounds) and I have a real interest in the role that fandom and especially shipping/fic plays in shaping and expressing sexuality. It’s a bit of a back burner research topic for now but I suppose over the years researching fic and expressions of sexuality via fandom and shipping has just made me fall in love with fandom itself a little bit.

Plus having lurked around the edges of hockeyblr for a while I was just like, yeah, I really want in on this, this seems like an awesome community. The reason why I chose the pens was pretty straightforward - I felt like I knew Sid and Geno and after exploring the real life hockey, I, like most of us, was quite struck by who Sid is as a person and was just completely enchanted. Another side note - hilariously, when my husband first saw a picture of Sid last year he immediately said “Oh, he looks like me!” - do with that information what you wish. 

I really eagerly awaited the start of the 2023 season and without sounding too soppy, had already fallen in love with you guys before I ever watched a live hockey game. Every fandom has its difficult corners (pensblr included!) but I can honestly say - especially after the chaos of spending my teenage years knee deep in 1D fandom and my early and mid twenties in various parts of sportsblr - being part of this space has been the most lovely, fun, friendly, lighthearted, positive and beautiful fandom experience I’ve ever had. I feel like it’s the goldilocks zone of all the previous fandoms I’ve been in and I love it.

So yeah! That is the extremely long winded answer to your question, anon. I hope this is the ‘lore drop’ you were looking for lol

TLDR: I stumbled my way through sportsblr until I accidentally ended up here and I’m never leaving.

[nightwonder7]

If you were transported into Identity V, would you be a survivor or hunter? And what would your ability be, or just the concept of it be?

Hmmm that's a very interesting question >0> Honestly, I think I'd be a survivor. I'm more likely to run away from people than go and chase after them gfdhgjkd /hj

As for abilities, perhaps something that would keep me hidden. Invisibility? Camouflage? If so, I think I'd be a decoder and that would be my one kiting tool. But I'd have bad vaulting and palette drop speed.

I could also see myself as an assist type. Not a harasser, but maybe one that gives buffs to teammates. What that would be exactly, I'm not entirely sure 'XD