#//this is so cool have I not reblogged this before?

[philistiniphagottini]

Flustered

Hiya, I wanted to do a little writing practice for Sunday so I wrote some fluffy little piece. I know it has probably been done a hundred times before but I also want to tease his wings a little. Positive feedback would be appreciated if you want to see me write more for Sunday.

Comments/reblogs highly appreciated

cw. fluff, established relationship, gender neutral reader, chubby reader, minors do not interact with me or any of my works

Sunday didn’t expect you had ulterior motives when you beckoned him to move closer to you. You were sitting side by side in the parlor car, a respectable space between you both yet close enough orbiting in each other’s company that you were clearly something more than just friends. You were completely alone with each other, late into the evening while the other crew members had retired to bed only a short time ago. You could speak freely without having to lean in so close but Sunday decided to indulge you. 

The book Sunday had been reading closed with a soft thump as he placed it to the side, beckoned closer to you by the crook of your finger. You were bold enough to scoot closer to him, your plump body almost squished against his side as you leaned closer. Sunday tilted his head to the side as you cupped your hand around your mouth, signalling you intended to whisper something in his ear. Your plump lips puckered softly as you leaned in close, until you could smell the scent of his cologne invading your senses, before you blew a puff of cool air against the small bend in his wing. 

To say the Halovian got flustered was an understatement. His reaction was instantaneous when he felt the air you produced ruffle his feathers, the unexpected huff of air sending tingles to run straight down his spine and make the base of his skull tingle from the unexpected jolt against his wing. He immediately wrenched himself away from you like you had stung him, the feathers of his wings puffing up in sordid content. He slapped his hand over his mouth, hoping to stifle the pathetic noise that tried to crawl out of his throat. His attempt failed and the sudden sharp rasp of air that whistled through his teeth cut through the sounds of your delighted snickers. Your ears perked up to the sound and you stopped laughing, blinking at Sunday with wide, doe eyes as he continued to shrink under your gaze. 

“What was that?” you questioned. 

Heat crept over Sunday’s cheeks, the tips of his ears burning red hot as the heat even started to creep down his neck. The collar of his shirt suddenly felt too tight and he continued to burn under your inquisitive stare. You suddenly scooted closer to him once more, now invading his personal space as you continued to poke and prod him for answers. He vehemently tried to fight off the cherry red tinting his cheeks as he twisted his head away from your view. 

“What was that just now, Sunny?” you questioned again. 

He averted his gaze, trying to hide his flushed expression behind his hands but being thwarted when you grabbed his wrists and pulled them away. 

“Please, don’t call me that” he mumbled. 

There was no malice to his words and he was finding it harder and harder to fight you off as you practically crawled into his lap by now, your plump body perched on his knees as you grabbed at him with soft hands. Your soft giggled made his ears ring and head feel dizzy as you tried to get a closer look at him. He refused to look at you, his wings coming to cross in front of his face and hide his flushed cheeks when you leaned in closer. A small pout tugged on your lips when you wrestled his hands away, only to find another obstacle in your way. 

“Come on, I just want to have a peek~” you cooed playfully.

“Why?” Sunday asked, chancing a peek at you over the soft flutter of his wings. 

You continued to smile down at him, fingers intertwined with his as you gently squeezed his hands. 

“Because I never see any expression on your face other than passive indifference” you complained with a soft whine. “Pretty please? I promise I won’t laugh.”

Pools of molten gold stared back at you. Sunday was quite endeared to you. He found it hard to deny any request you made when you spoke to him in such a sickeningly sweet tone it made his head feel a little dizzy. Many thoughts crossed his mind and it took a long moment for him to gather his composure before he decided to indulge you for the second time this evening and adhere to your request. His wings slowly lowered from his face, the soft, white feathers brushing against his hot skin as they revealed what lay hidden beneath them. His lips were pressed into a tight, thin line, red cheeks almost glowing in the dim lights of the parlor car as his fair lashes fluttered over his cheeks. You had never seen such a flustered look pulling at his soft features before and you couldn’t help the smile that tilted your lips. You leaned forward, kissing the tip of Sunday’s nose and causing the Halovian beneath you to fumble and stutter in a flushed mess. 

“Wh-What was that for?” Sunday asked. 

You continued to smile. “You’re really cute, Sunny~”

Sunday hadn’t been called cute since he was a child. He thought the word was a little childish, if he was being quite honest. But hearing the words fall from your parted lips? He liked how it sounded, his heart beating a little faster as the feathers of his wings puffed up in content. You traced the movements of his wings with your eyes, only for your gaze to be drawn to his mouth when you saw his lips twitch with a ghost of a smile. 

“Thank you. You certainly know how to flatter me.”

His gaze was still shy and it was slowly dawning on you that perhaps you had teased him a little too much for one evening. A soft hum stirred in your throat as you leaned forward and kissed his nose again, noticing how he leaned up and into your touch this time as he squeezed your hands close. 

“You should smile more often too” you mentioned. “Frowning will give you wrinkles.”

A soft huff breezed past Sunday’s lips., the heat in his cheeks dying down yet still making his skin simmer with warmth. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

[gallifreyriver]

Reblogging again for the above addition (I had forgotten to add it with the first bit it due to still recovering from the realization the bit I did add hadn't been Ai) and also to include the following from the notes:

because both are relevant to what I'm going to say next, which is that we need to have a conversation both about doublespeak and gaslighting.

To just jump right in, Trump did indeed describe Elon Musk's knowledge of voting systems as the reason he won Pennsylvania. (Timestamp) And yes, Elon very much did the hitler salute, not once, but twice, after his speech. (Video) (Also the shooting a person bit- Trump said that too, but I'll bring that back up later.)

I bring those two up first to address how the first set of tags mention that the bit about Trump talking about rigging the election could indeed actually be meant about his delusion that Biden rigged the election in 2020- but it could also be doublespeak.

(Before I start tho, the first set of tags obviously mean well and this is in no way an attack on them. I'm not even saying they're wrong- I'm just saying this opens up a conversation that needs to be had)

To explain what I mean, I need to again mention how that before he says,

"...and we got the World Cup too- and you know it's only because they rigged the election that I'll be your president representing you there. You know I got both of them. I got the Olympics, and I got the World Cup. Then I said, 'You know it's too bad- one was in 2026 and the other was in 2028," and I said, "I won't be there, I won't be your president!" ... but then they rigged the election and now we won so I'm going to be your president for the Olympics, and for the World Cup."

the comment about Musk, the voting computers, and Pennsylvania was already mentioned, where he said:

"...and then he journeyed to Pennsylvania, where he spent like a month and a half campaigning for me in Pennsylvania. He's a popular guy- and he was very effective- and he knows those computers better than anybody- all those computers, those vote counting computers- and we wound up winning Pennsylvania like in a landslide, so it was pretty good. It was pretty good. So thank you to Elon!"

Clearly, due to his massive ego, he wants so badly to brag about what he did, but can't.

His comment about Elon was pretty damning- possibly the closest we'll get to a confession. However, because he never outright says the words, "Elon tampered with the computers," that leaves just enough doubt for it to be said that he's was just complimenting Elon on being "cool" and "smart" and that the "landslide" just so happened because people obviously just loved Elon so much (barf)

And because he's never shut up about claiming the 2020 election was rigged, it's also very easy to come to the conclusion that, "Well, when he says "they" rigged the election, he must really mean Biden in 2020."

And I can agree to a point- he very well might have meant Biden! However, this just as easily could be doublespeak as well- another confession said in just such a way that it's very easy to claim he meant something else.

And it's kind of time, due to everything else he and his supporters have said/done yet gotten away scot free with- like people trying so hard to brand that nazi salute as literally anything else, and how his supporters tried to brand the insurrection as tourists visiting the capitol, and the fact that Trump has shown that he can say and do whatever he pleases with no consequences to the degree that he committed 34 felonies yet still was allowed to not only run but also be elected president- that we kind of need to stop giving him that benefit of the doubt.

Again, I agree that he could have meant Biden- it is possible. But also the exact words he used were "but then they rigged the election and now we won," which is a weird way to say it if he meant Biden in 2020, and combined with the fact that he made no effort to specify 2020, or Biden, anywhere in that whole paragraph it took him to say it- I'm reminded of one reporter, Zachary Wolf, who had been covering Trump back in 2017, who said "What does he mean when he says words?" (You may remember the line from an episode of John Oliver's Last Week Tonight about Trumps copious lies)

I fully understand not wanting to possibly spread misinformation- because that's what "they" do and we don't want to feel like we're as bad as Trump supporters or fall into pulling their tactics-

But I also say it's time we stop giving him the benefit of the doubt- because look where that has gotten us.

Doublespeak and gaslighting are designed to confuse and to make you not want to call out what you hear or see because you're afraid to look stupid or "crazy", and it's also designed so that people who are afraid to make waves will default to either believing the more innocent possible meaning or ignoring the problem altogether, because it's easier than fighting back- especially when you see those around you staying silent, downplaying the harm, or even outright denying that the less-innocent meaning is even a possibility. (eg: "It's just locker-room talk" or "It's not a hitler salute- he's just awkward! He was throwing his heart to the crowd!" or "They were just tourists")

All of which only emboldens those who are engaging in the harm and their supporters because it means there are no consequences for that harm. To the point that even when there are people calling out the behavior, many people, even prominent people, it still doesn't matter- because there's just enough doubt that the supporters will happily give the benefit of said doubt and fight for them, or at very least not oppose them.

And it works so well that there's now a chance we might never have another election again.

Again, maybe he really did mean Biden and 2020. But there's also the chance, given everything we do know and have seen, that he really didn't.

Did Trump just admit to rigging the 2024 U.S. Elections????

LIVE????

ON. NATIONAL. TV??????

@drawing-dinos82

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Try, Try, Try 2

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics including adultery and trying to conceive. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Character: husband!Andy Barber, friend!Thor

masterlist - to be added

Summary: your husband puts high expectations on you but you don’t think you’ll ever be enough for him.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️

You’re not entirely enthused for the cooking class. The taint of Andy’s intentions follows you down to the community centre, that echoing reminder that you’re inadequate. There is a part of you that cherishes the distraction, the moment outside the house when you’re not mopping or tittering around to make sure everything is perfect. Even so, it’s only to make sure that you don’t give your husband another reason to rant. 

As you enter, you’re greeted by the rather bouncy instructor. She introduces herself a Barb. She’s plump and her pixie cut is died a shade of purplish red. You give her your name and she checks you off the list. 

You look around as she sends you off to find a work station. You’re drawn to a familiar face. You smile and cross the room. 

“Hey, Porsha,” you approach your neighbour. “I thought you’d be home with the twins.” 

She turns to preen at you. Her perfectly highlighted hair ripples in soft waves and you wouldn’t guess that she’s three months postpartum. She greets you with a tilt of her head. 

“Oh, hi, how are you?” 

“Um, okay. How are you feeling? How are the boys?” You ask. 

“A lot. Timothy’s still on his business trip so the nanny’s with the tots. I needed a break,” she explains with a sigh. You see her live-in nanny often; dark-haired woman often dragging out the garbage or schlupping round the stroller. “Mandy’s on her way. We signed up together.” She looks behind her at the counter, “I’m saving her a spot.” 

You glance over and realise each station is made only for two. You take the hint with grace. Her and Mandy were always close. In fact, all the women in the neighbourhood knew each other better than you knew any of them. You’re still the new one and your family is still incomplete. 

“Right, well, I hope you enjoy the class,” you smile. 

“Oh yes, I pumped before I came so I can enjoy some wine. You get a glass to cook with,” she chimes. 

“Ah, that’s... cool. Well, I’ll go find a place,” you point over your shoulder with your thumb. 

You turn and a squeal erupts across the room. Mandy taps furiously over to Porscha, passing you without notice, and the two bounce and hug. You could use some of that wine but you’re not drinking. You promised Andy. 

You find a station in the corner, far from your neighbours. You feel left out even if they don’t mean to exclude you. It’s hard not to when every time you see them, you’re just sort of there and more interested in each other. 

Barb’s full voice fills the room as she welcomes the newcomers. You focus on the counter top, taking in the sink, the cooktop, and the various pieces set out for your work. You’re not so sure about this anymore. You’ll go home and try it on your own then prove to Andy that you will always be mediocre. 

“Pardon,” a thunderous timbre pulls you from your self-pity. You raise your chin as you bat your lashes at the rather large man at the corner of the counter. He smiles. He’s familiar but you don’t think he’s from the neighbourhood, “do you mind if I share? Barb says we should have a partner and my brother declined my invite.” 

“Oh, um,” you look around. The other stations are full. You shrug, “sure, that’s okay.” 

“Wonderful,” he booms in his boisterous voice. You narrow your eyes at him and tilt your head as you try to pluck out where you know him from. 

He’s tall and broad, blonde hair past his shoulders, the front strands pulled back into a runic clip, and he wears a button-up that threatens to split as the buttons strain over his chest. He turns to stand parallel to you and grabs the tongs, clacking them contently. 

You sense the attention of another. You lean to see around the man as Porscha and Mandy whisper behind their hands and stare. You frown and teeter on your toes. 

“Forgive me,” he snaps the tongs again. “I’ve not introduced myself. Thor.” 

“Thor...” you repeat then give your name as his snags in your head. “Thor... you’re not...” you squint at him. 

“Hm, I hoped I’d not draw suspicion,” he tries to make himself smaller in a rather comical way for someone so big. “It is I, yes.” 

“What...” 

“I found this place on a map. I thought perhaps somewhere smaller might afford me some discretion,” he turns his head as he continues to toy with the tongs and he glances around at those peeking at him. “Your planet is rather small and reputations do spread far and wide.” 

“Right, uh, well, yeah, it must be awkward.” 

“Mm, it is not something I’m unused to. I am known across the nine realms and beyond.” He turns back. “But, since I have chosen to reside here for a time, I thought I might learn the customs. The food. I’ve been eating a lot of pizza and well...” he looks down and pats his stomach, the fabric just as taut there. “It’s accumulated.” 

You can’t help but laugh, “mm, pizza. I haven’t had any in ages.” 

“No? In New York, it is everywhere. I find myself inundated.” He declares. “I understand we are to cook... alfr-ee-doo.” 

“Alfredo,” you correct him. “Looks like we’ll be making our own pasta too,” you point at the press. 

“Pasta. Mmm, yes, I do enjoy the dish.” He nods as he scratches his beard with the tongs. He can’t seem to stop his fidgeting. “And what brings the lady to the cookery?” 

“Oh, uh, my husband signed me up,” you say, tucking your hands behind you.  

“He did? And he did not accompany you?” He inquires. “How unfortunate. Were she still speaking to me, I’d have asked my... former acquaintance Jane, but she is far too busy and wise for me. I must admit I was hesitant to attend alone.” 

You nod, “I’m sorry. That’s too bad.” 

“Not very bad. I’ve met you. A lovely young lady,” he proclaims and gestures to you with the tongs. “I can already see you will be a partner preferable to my brother. He is not very skilled at collaboration. I would need to mind the knives.” 

You chuckle again. It feels good to laugh. You only realise then, how long it’s been since you’ve done so genuinely. 

[harpieisthecarpie]

looking at how Goro Akechi became a foil of Akira Kurusu thru their childhood (attachment styles)

(Content Warnings for discussing all the stuff in Akechi's childhood specifically, bad parenting, neglect, mental illness. Take care of urselves)

waking up to the tags @1derpu2 added on another post of mine about Akechi ("#I don't think I could survive in his position") had me thinking of a 15-16 year old Akechi, and how survival even feels to him.

Because arguably Akechi has been in survival mode since he was born. Even with a mother doing her best to provide, poverty fundamentally rewrites the brain especially at such a young age−

(Tangent: Akechi's dessert blog actually reminds me of Brennan Lee Mulligan during the d20 Misfits & Magic actual play discussing his character [Evan Kelmp, an unhoused orphaned kid] ordering from desserts at restaurants in order to maximize caloric intake for his money bc stuff on the dessert menu actually tends to contain the most calories– ANYWAYS)

–and he also can feel the underlying tension in how his mother is treated, how he himself is treated, how there is no support network for them. I can imagine that's part of the lure of an ensemble kid's show like Featherman: reliable companions who take your hand rather than slapping it away.

I've done a lot of reading into attachment styles and attachment trauma (bc it's interesting and also haha ;] trauma) and it is a really cool lens to view the differences between our two Wild Cards Akechi and Akira.

adding a reblog with an attachment theory rundown! actual discussion of akechu attachment stuff below cut

There is no better fit for Akechi than a Disorganized Attachment style after finding his sole caregiver and financial (his mother) dead by her own hand after years of her focus being split by the work she needed to do for them to afford survival, before being passed around by distant relatives who viewed him with contempt, if they acknowledged him at all.

The world treated him and his mother like vermin, so of course no one else is trustworthy, of course the people who take advantage are evil. Of course everyone takes advantage. Just like his father, who is the root of this whole horrible thing (the thing being Goro's life, the thing being Goro)

His mother left him violently, voluntarily (from his pov, suicide & mental illness are complicated), so he must be someone repulsive. Incapable of being loved. If he wants others to love him, and he must in order to get close enough to his father to kill, then he must be anything other than himself.

One of the symptoms of disorganized attachment and attachment trauma is the inability to regulate emotions, leading those with it to feel things with an intensity they can't control, soothe, or explain that can fluctuate between emotions rapidly.

And doesn't that markedly fit with a kid who has awoken such disparate personas that are both him? His entire relationship with the world (there must be justice but there is no such thing as justice) and his inner psyche does explain why he brings up Hegel. If you have both Loki and Robin Hood inside you, thesis and antithesis, then isn't it a comfort to know their existence somehow makes sense? That you are synthesis rather than just chaos and pain.

Meanwhile, from the little we hear about Akira's parents and how Persona 5 frames the adults around him, the Avoidant attachment style fits best. He is fiercely independent, with such a strong sense of identity despite with the masks he wears for others that he has the true Wild Card ability. He stands his ground with his morals, even when everyone around him is telling him his life would be easier if he gave up.

He has a strong internal moral center because he was never attached enough to his caregivers that they'd be able to influence his cognitive assimilation. Why trust someone's moral judgment when you can't even trust them with your vulnerability?

This is why Akira and Akechi are so fascinating as foils, as rivals, and as people who know each other better than anyone else could. Akechi walks around as a fake, appealing version of himself that Akira sees through clearly. And Akira likes the bitter, vicious, angry version of Akechi because it's honest. That is the underlying intensity of people he knows is hidden behind the masks adults are convinced are their faces. (Where's your rage? RISE RISE RISE)

Akira and Akechi match so well not because they have a hidden ugliness, but because they view the pleasant masks people wear to excuse or ignore injustice as what are truly ugly. And their difference lies in Akira's belief that there is good in people while Akechi's upbringing has him convinced that humanity is rotten to its roots.

And Akechi wants Akira's beating, caring heart between his teeth because there is still a lonely little child in his own chest who loves Featherman and just wanted a better life for his mom. And who won't fucking die, no matter how Akechi tears the world apart to match his perception of it.

Akechi has spent years trying to kill his heart, which has done nothing but soaked his masks in his own blood.

Akira looks Akechi in the eyes, straight through those masks, and steals his heart from off the chopping block. And he keeps it close even as Akechi turns the blade on him in a rage borne of fear.

They're gay as hell thanks for coming to my ted talk. might improve after work

[mercurymacaroons]

arrives 15 min late with a latte

......sup

[quillsandblades]

Thank you for the tags @starshower1215 and @storiesofaot!! I just realised this is the same post I rebloged months ago, it came back to me in a full circle lol. Well I've done it before but there's no harm in doing it again

Three Ships You Like: Levihan of course, love it so much, you can pry this obsession out of my cold dead hands. Other than this... well I've never been much into shipping so there's only a handful of others i could pick from. So that would include Eremika and Damianya

First Ship Ever: I'm pretty sure it was Locklyle

Last Song You Heard: "Wolf in Sheep's Clothing" by Set It Off has been going on repeat for a long while lol. I found a random animatic on it that was so cool and then I couldn't stop listening

Favourite Childhood Book: Never can choose. There's just so many lol, Harry Potter cuz maybe it was the first proper novel I read (and began one of my own soon after - child me was ambitious), or His Dark Materials was an amazing read too. I'm still in awe of how that trilogy was written. "A Wrinkle in Time" was also one of the unforgettable ones. I know I'm naming a whole list here, but the point is I can't choose 😭 they've all been precious to me

Currently Reading: My notes lmao. Or the fic I'm writing.

Currently Watching: Nothing in particular

Currently Consuming: Loads of fresh air and freshly squeezed orange juice 😋

Currently Craving: A bonfire, a game of badminton and a nice picnic - in short all the things i can't have right now lol

Tagging if you wanna

@sunflowersunite @dont-f-with-moogles @this-is-krikkit @wanderlustqueen-writes @youre-ackermine @seamsterspell and anyone else who'd like to join!

Thank you for the tag @thistlecatfics :D

3 ships you like: Sirius/Severs is a very loved favourite. Fenrir/Alphard is a personal headcanon, and for some non-Harry Potter: Niki/Joe from The Old Guard will always have my heart

First ship ever: Niki/Joe brought me to writing fanfic, before them I mostly did OCs.

Last song you heard: I'm all shook up from Elvis. We are in our "teach the kids some good music fundamentals"phase.

Favourite childhood book: Astrid Lindgren's Ronia, the Robber's Daughter - such a beautiful book to teach kids about tolerance, acceptance and about making their own decisions

Currently reading: Terry Pratchett - the collected books :)

Currently watching: I am a bit in between because I just finished "The law according to Lidia Poet" a beautiful Italian series - obscure but absolutely worth it (give it a try if you can)

Currently consuming: lemon white chocolate cookie, super unhealthy but good for the soul

Currently craving: the next ball room dance. I will have to wait a whole year and it was so perfect yesterday

I tag @squintclover , @soloorganaas, @tracingpatternswrites, @metalomagnetic AND @meteoralinart

[smile-files]

nickel and balloon stuff from spring on the breakfast!!! i'm keeping in mind that in the previous episode, both of them were under the impression that their friendship wasn't real...

in a way, ii3 balloon is a lot like late ii3 cabby. of course, balloon did something indisputably immoral (manipulate and exploit others), and cabby only did something thought to be immoral (keep and use files about her fellow contestants) -- but both did something wrong and had to subsequently undergo a disproportionate amount of abuse and malignment for it, ending up with them being apologetic and submissive to avoid any chance of being framed as bad again. the biggest difference is that cabby has internalized the guilt others have attributed to her, while balloon largely hasn't -- he understands the concept of rolling with the punches for the sake of keeping good connections, but he doesn't believe he deserves it.

nickel brushes off ii2 a LOT this episode. to rid himself of his guilt regarding that time, he necessarily has to delegitimize the hatred he felt towards balloon then, thus also ridding balloon of his guilt. he expresses this all vaguely, choosing to remember ii2 fondly and saying off-hand that its baggage should be laughed off -- implying that balloon has been forgiven. reasonably, balloon is happy that nickel seems to actually believe he's changed for the better, so initially this makes him happy.

of course, though, it becomes clear that nickel just wants to shove his own actions under the rug, and balloon reasonably gets pissed off. nickel treated balloon and suitcase like complete garbage in ii2, and balloon clearly hasn't forgotten that.

"it keeps things easy." it keeps things easy to roll with the punches, to endure nickel's abuse and accept his sudden friendship. note, also, that nickel is still placing the blame on balloon: he's saying that balloon didn't want to "make things better", as if nickel and balloon ever having a rift was entirely balloon's fault, and his problem to fix.

and as we can see, nickel still hasn't fully forgiven balloon for ii1. as i've discussed before, nickel seems to secretly feel incredible guilt about how he treated balloon in ii2 (which is why he goes to such lengths to repress the whole memory of it) -- but that guilt is about the way in which he expressed his disdain and distrust of balloon, not those opinions themselves, nor the motivations for them. this is all very interesting, then -- if he still believes balloon can't change from his old, bad self, why did nickel start being friends with him at all?

i think a large part of it is his projection onto balloon. nickel sees himself in balloon: someone who screwed up big-time and isn't able to become a better person after that (according to nickel). we tend to gravitate to people similar to us, after all. i wouldn't be surprised if nickel was also trying to overcompensate for his hostility towards balloon in ii2 by being very friendly with him in ii3, thereby helping him forget that he was ever hostile to him at all.

the most fascinating thing to me about balloon and nickel's relationship is how impersonal it is for balloon. he seems to value what nickel's affection represents rather than nickel himself -- and it represents that he's been forgiven. anyone who saw balloon and nickel's conflict in ii2, which was a product of balloon's nastiness in ii1 and nickel's subsequent inability to forgive that nastiness, would likely come to accept balloon and forgive him themselves if they then saw nickel being friendly with him -- because nickel is the epitome of the ii contestants' anger at him, and nickel of all people (seemingly) forgiving him would imply that he's really changed. the relationship is almost entirely a symbol in that regard. i don't think balloon has much residual guilt about is actions in ii1 -- he feels like he's adequately addressed them and changed -- but nickel having a positive relationship would be helpful in affirming that stance and proving to himself that he really has changed.

i wouldn't say it's cruel of balloon to keep this relationship going on under that pretense, but it is backhanded, and it helps explain why he was ever willing to accept nickel's friendliness unchallenged. he wanted his crimes to finally be laid to rest once and for all, and keeping nickel on good terms with him would let that happen. people would finally shut up about it. up until now, nickel wasn't explicitly denying his past cruelty towards balloon anyway, so balloon would be able to ignore that he neglected to ever bring it up; now, though, nickel is denying not only what he did to balloon but also to suitcase, which balloon is not able to tolerate. now that he's confronted nickel about that though, nickel snaps back with his condemnation of what balloon did in ii1, thereby uprooting the social stasis balloon had been able to maintain precisely because nickel refused to bring anything up before. in a way, then, balloon is purposefully shoving the past under the rug, just like nickel is.

we can't forget, though, that nickel has his own complex about fearing that he's incapable of change and incapable of forming positive, genuine relationships with people. balloon is essentially revealing that, in a way, he wasn't really friends with nickel -- at least not in the way nickel wished and fooled himself into thinking they were. if balloon truly were friends with nickel like that, then that would mean that balloon had forgiven him for his cruelty in ii2, and perhaps that he really has changed... but no. balloon hasn't forgiven him. why should he? nickel never apologized -- and given how he never apologized, it's impossible that he could've changed anyway: nickel doesn't want to apologize because that means addressing his guilt and allowing himself to feel it. he wants the forgiveness to be handed to him on a silver platter, without him having to do all of the painful work, and he's incredibly upset when it isn't. he wants to not be a bad person, but in order to do that, he has to feel like one, and he really doesn't want to. he hates who he was and doesn't want to associate with it at all.

(note how it's the suitcase robot who says "you can say sorry" when nickel says that nothing can be done about making things better...)

there's clearly an immeasurable amount of resentment these two have been harboring for each other throughout this season, which they'd only been hiding for the sake of fooling themselves into thinking they've changed (nickel) or thinking that others think they've changed (balloon). and now that they've let themselves explode with anger, partly related to the lies they'd been telling themselves falling apart, they yell at each other and balloon drops nickel down a hole!

ah, balloon and nickel's relationship... it's bizarre, it's toxic, it's convoluted, it's shady, and it's incredibly sad. i'm glad i'm revisiting ii3, especially this episode -- i used to be utterly baffled by nickel's writing, particularly in spring on the breakfast, but now it makes complete sense to me. also, i used to think balloon was entirely the victim in this relationship, while now i know that he has his own faults and own baggage in that regard. it's weird -- they hate each other, but at the same time they're dying to be liked by one another. god i love these freaks...

[thunderstomm]

“she’s gonna blow!!”

Alt Versions (red eyes and w/o text):

Speedpaint will be on my insta (: ❤️

[velvetvexations]

I wasn’t totally fine with it, I thought it was weird but trusted her enough to think she had her own reasons.

Such a brave stance against transphobia. If someone misgenders trans women you're going to be understanding if I continue to say I respect them and reblog their based transfymynysm? If someone was he/himming you and I said I trusted them to have a good reason for it, and continued to pal around with them, that's fine, yeah?

Also what’s with all this hostility? I thought we had a positive interaction a bit ago and were like at least a little cool with each other now?

Were we? When I had you blocked you continued to go through my blog complaining about my takes and getting worked up about how everything I do vexates you. Our last conversation was me getting you to correct [name withheld] because it apparently got confused on something you told it and to your credit you did that and [name withheld] did delete the post. Funny as it is I think [name withheld] actually has surprisingly consistent morals as far as yall go. The bar is truly underwater, but relatively speaking, you know.

My point is, I feel like you've been consistently polite in DMs even to the point of expressing sympathy when I got really worked up and anxious, but then immediately go and trash me in really petty ways, and continue to go along with accusations of me believing things I manifestly do not believe. You yourself made a post about how I "call trans women groomers" because I think a niche on a dying social media website is unhealthy for them and could lead to them being abused like the last group that tried to reclaim 'baeddel.'

And, I mean, really, the audacity to go all "I thought we were on better terms now? :(" after you reblogged Talia having a meltdown over a post from months ago where I very briefly mentioned practicing Hinduism and she went on a rant about how Hinduism needs to be done away with because it's an inherently evil religion. (see here before anyone tries to say that's not what she was saying)

But beyond that, you believe and support really horrible things about others, so I'm not sure why you're expecting us to be super cordial. I am, right now, being a lot nicer to you than a lot of my engagements with people in your camp. Like you're good and cool with a woman who misgenders trans men and tells people to send them harassing messages to "demoralize" them, that alone is pretty bad, let alone all the lateral aggression you prop up.

I don't know why I'm getting so defensive about this. Be a kinder person if you don't want me to be "hostile" lol? I'm not calling you a moron, for the sheer size of the gulf between us I think that's relatively polite discourse by my standards. If you want to sincerely be my friend be a kinder person. I'll invite you to D&D games.

Seriously, Flen. I told you in DMs I was going to leave you unblocked again to hold a door open if you ever want to get out of this bullshit and be a kinder, better transfeminist. I would love nothing more for us to be pals, genuinely. I've literally helped a TERF deradicalize and retransition with this approach.

But you're going to have to stop calling people dehumanizing slurs like "th**fab" and maybe consider misgendering something worth taking a firm stance on even when it's not trans women.

This stuff is also barely related to what I asked. That being, what are TRFs (supposedly me) saying about bi and pan people?

I don't know, I said I didn't know in the OP, that's why I was only responding to the tags. Which is to say that yeah, maybe you never had problems when you identified as aro yourself, but you were totally behind a woman going "all the transandrobros are the same people who were pro-ace during the ace discourse" just recently, a spinelessness that fits considering how quick you were to fold on your objection to Thicc misgendering people.

Imagine my shock (actually not shock at all) when I found out that trans radfems are also exclusionists towards ace/aro people and bi/pan people

lmao the fuck are they saying about bi/pan people

[commandertartarsmoocher]

*trundles into your askbox* guess who dug through this entire blog! Hellar it makes me so insanely happy to see more people enjoying this cringe phone I've been on this grind for five years now all alone. Some of my older drawings are in here too I used to be stobotnik :} cheggout my BAG

Holy moly guacamole, that is an amazing Commander Tartar ita bag you got there!

I am so in love with the blender-thingamajig... ohhh look at Agent 8 in there with the lil memcakes... And Tartar on top of the blender... It's so creative!

Yep, this is the best thing I've seen in a long time.

Super duper mega awesome stuff, thank you for showing this to me 🫶

[stardestroyer81]

Can I offer you a nice transfem sheep in this tryin' time? 💙🏳️‍⚧️✨

[helielune]

powder keg (full under the cut)

[eightwholebreads]

Long and immediate explanatory reblog!

The cardigan was made in about a month for the 2022 taskamster picnic from this tutorial here. It wasn't quite finished on time (I ran out of black literally the night before while doing the edge at the front) so it was first worn at the Horne section TV show premiere

The pin on the collar of the cardigan was made by @call-me-tk for this trip. It's the TM wax seal but the letters are NY and a tiny 2025

My tshirt was gifted to me by @just-a-leech-boy (riz) for christmas and printed on it is backhair friday

The ita bag itself was also a gift from riz.

The postcard in the window is from when greg and alex were selling signed chesham united shirts back in late 2023

The red house pin on the top of the postcard and the winged TM pin on the bottom of the postcard are from the taskmaster live experience shop

The various TM pins up the sides of the postcard are ones I got made and are for sale if you ask about them (I can't take any orders until March though because I'm in the US until then)

The golden trophy key chain on the side and the TM wax seal key chain on the other side (not visible here) are from the taskmaster live experience shop

The dolls are from a pattern from/based on one by Crafty Estonean on lovecrafts. The alex one was a gift to riz when they were in the UK last year. The alex one is from directly following the pattern as it was written, and the greg one is modified to make his body shape and hairline more accurate. I consider both of these prototypes and was planning to make another copy of both of them with more modifications but didn't have time because my current crochet project is really holding me up. (I consider both of these cool-downs between bigger projects). I'm slightly glad Greg didn't see them because the hairline situation looks really bad compared to alex's, even though alex's hair is so inaccurate (especially at the back) that it really bothers me

Also I was wearing these pineapple socks (but you couldn't see them due to the big boots I was wearing that day)

Someone who knows how to take a nice photo took a photo of my ita bag!

[chaos-potat]

I feel like being mutuals means so much less than everyone makes it seem

You literally just follow each other, that's it

Most of my mutuals probably don't even remember who I am after I stopped drawing for them

Edit: the rant in the tags is more about being annoyed with people who tell me they like my art and follow me, but that's it, no art support at all

[spark-circuit]

woe,

[autopotion]

Reblog this if you want, it would be cool to see a broader set of opinions