#//at least i'm trying to feel good about myself
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I've been thinking about this song a lot again since yesterday, and if you'll indulge me in being overly wordy and a bit sentimental, I kinda wanna share some of my thoughts here:
so I alluded to this a bit while rambling on bluesky earlier, but early in the process of composing this song I REALLY wanted it to have lyrics. I tried writing some, and having looked at them again this morning, frankly they're kinda garbage and I stand by my decision to scrap them and let the music just speak for itself. but I only really wanted to write lyrics in the first place because I got ONE specific line (and subsequently a chorus, or at least one version of it) stuck in my head and wanted the rest of the song to kinda revolve around it.
the scrapped verses were sorta loosely about how, when you're younger, you tend to have a very straightforward and simple sense of optimism and justice - kids generally believe that things WILL just work out somehow, and often have surprisingly obvious and on-point responses when they learn about societal issues, but adults will often talk down to them and tell them they just don't understand how the real world works yet. and as you get older, that optimism gets conflated heavily with childlike naivety and kinda gets metaphorically beaten out of a lot of people over time, until they're just kinda consigned to the status quo and thinking of societal problems being too large/permanent for them to fix or influence.
this song was meant to embody a sense of rebellious optimism - a stubborn belief that we have a say in the kind of world we live in, and furthermore that our inner child would never forgive us for shrugging and giving up now that we're finally Adults and Adults are supposed to be the ones with the power to actually Fix Things. it was meant to evoke some nostalgia too, sure - thus the title "Grass Stains", which came from the scrapped first verse about childhood, and also just the general musical style being reminiscent of pop punk music I really liked as a kid and still tend to associate with summertime and old video games from that era. but more than that, I wanted to convey the idea that, sooner or later, we have to stop waiting for the Adults to decide how to fix things and get a hand on the ball ourselves; the idea that growing up should empower us, not make us cynical and detached and too tired to care anymore.
anyways, I will spare you most of the unfinished lyrics because I really do promise they're not interesting or good at all, but here's the chorus part and the specific last line that I was really fixated on back then and (for reasons that are probably not hard to imagine) thinking a lot about again now:
you keep pacing
so sullenly facing
away from the task left to you
why can't you see it?
if you want hope, then be it
those gears aren't just going to move
you gotta change the world, before it changes you
so yeah. shit's rough out there right now. shit's been rough for a while and it's gonna continue being rough for the foreseeable future. like I mentioned in the original caption, i wrote this song when I was feeling pretty awful (both mentally and physically, actually - I'm pretty sure I had covid for the second time when I made this lol) and needed something to perk up my mood, and it... kinda worked honestly? and now when I listen to it again I still kinda get a boost from it, especially if I let myself think back to the original message I was trying to imbue it with. it's hard for me to feel totally hopeless or unmotivated while I'm listening to it, and I hope that energy sorta comes through for other people too (though I would obviously be just as happy that people like the music I made anyways, without deeper context or ideas attached to it).
I guess i just wanna say this: remember that the world's gonna change one way or another, but your contributions to it are never meaningless, and their absence would be felt. and you also have the power to embolden and support those around you to become a stronger force for good together. the only real way to fail in all of this is to give up and lay down and let whatever happens wash over you, to believe them when they treat you like you're too small to be a threat or a challenge. and even if you don't believe your efforts matter to anyone else, let them matter to you. if you want hope, then be it. strive to be a force for good in spite of all opposition, and that goodness will in turn continue to propel you forwards.
ok I think that's about as sappy I can stand to be, I'm going to bed lol
hey i finished a new song!! check it out!!
my prompt for starting this was essentially "i'm in a bad mood and i want to make music that'll fix that". apparently what that translated to was whatever genre "music that would make 9-year-old me think they could do a backflip off the swings at the park" is, but like... it DID cheer me up? so, mission accomplished? i hope you enjoy it too!
♫ made with OpenMPT! ✎ cover art by me!
#look at it again#buny text#feeling very self conscious about posting this addition honestly but it was literally preventing me from falling asleep til i got it out#it's past my bedtime so i am going to go ahead and use that as my excuse if this turns out to be corny and insufferable
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do you have any advice, resources or practices you recommend for making your art more expressive? I adore how you push expressions and body language, and the way it keeps its weight is phenomenal! I wanna learn how to do that, too!
hey thank you so much <3
one of the most important things that i've learned on my way and that i've kept in my mind ever since is what makani states in [this post] sometimes i go into a drawing and just try to construct it bit by bit, only to realize that the eyes don't fit the mouth etc... then i remember to treat it all as ONE expression and (second very important lesson incoming) i erase everything and start anew (i know it feels bad to just delete a sketch of a head (you don't have to delete it right away, you can always just take another layer) but believe me it not only saves you tons of time, you also learn more when you just start over from scratch. the thing i do is as follows, i keep the bad sketch open and try to figure out what i don't like about it, and put extra focus in those areas in the new sketch. like i think the eyes were too dull in the first try? the solution is to draw them open even wider, turn up that expression a nodge, try to "bend" it). i know this sounds exhausting, you might think isn't it easier to just try to fix the first sketch? i thought so too for many years, but believe me, if you don't like it, start a new one. you will always be amazed on how good it can turn out (and, as said before, the benefit of analyzing your own art and trying to figure out what went wrong and fixing it in a new attempt is HUGE.)
third thought on this is "don't be afraid to push the boundaries". like i grew up being a huge ren & stimpy fan as a kid, i love classic cartoons, i love exagerated expressions so much, eyes popping out, sweat drops flying around, over the top visualisation of feelings. that's my shit (pizza tower i'm looking at you). then on the other hand i also love things feeling palpable and real, hence the weird mix of my style i guess... what i want to say is: don't be afraid to push your expressions a bit. not only is it fun, with the right balance it really adds to it all (in regards of body language and facial expressions likewise).
and last but not least, so important: use references. i often take photos of myself doing weird gestures just to see how the mouth or the eyes would look like for a specific expression, how the nose wrinkles, how the shoulder come up when trying to visualize that someone is tense etc etc. use ref, please, not only photos but also drawings, try to figure out how other artists translate certain gestures in their art, how can you stylize this (everything ofc without copying directly from them... like for personal practice everything is cool and chill, but respect the rules of the artist community)
it is hard to pinpoint down how everything we do in our art lives comes down to what we draw at the end of the day, like everything i post, how it looks, is the result of almost 2 decades of drawing with a purpose, but i hope this helps a bit.
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Nam-gyu NSFW headcanons
A/N: Things are about to get NAYSTY. I'd like to apologize to god, and whoever isn't into this man for what i'm about to say.
SIKE
Alright let's get started shall we?
(^me getting ready to ruin my own life by being with a man like him)
꩜ This man is and always will be a freak in my mind. So hard hitters first. This man is a panty sniffer. I'm sorry someone had to say it but he just seems like the type of CREEP that would be, this is literally the first thing that came to mind when I saw him. I don't make the rules (yes i do, i'm literally the one writing this).
꩜ He likes being in control most of the time, but sometimes that facade will falter, small little whimpers and moans slipping from his pretty lips. Eyes fluttering in pleasure, lip trapped between his teeth, the whole nine.
꩜ Loves choking and being choked. He loves the power he has when his hand is around your throat, your pulse under his fingers. The way it brings a smirk to his lips... But vice versa, he loves the light headed feeling, the way it literally takes his breath away when you're kissing, he almost instinctively brings his hand up to make you tighten your grip on him.
꩜ LOVES having his hair pulled when you're kissing, good GAWD, it drives him crazy. This is the quickest way to make him crumble, a few tugs at his hair and he's going feral.
꩜ Don't get me wrong though, this man can make a night romantic enough, draws a bath yada yada, then fucks you into the sheets until you can't feel your legs. Kisses you, cleans you up.
꩜ Favorite position? Face down ass up, he loves that he can reach down, grab you by your throat or your hair, force your back against his chest as he fucks into you. OR he'll lay himself down on top of you, trapping you underneath him as he slowly, torturously, thrusts himself inside you. Drawing it out. He loves hearing the whines come from your mouth.
꩜ He has a FILTHY mouth. and he WILL call you a bitch, no matter your gender. But he also uses a fair share of other loving pet names to shower you in "You like that don't you, bitch?" "Baby you're squeezing around me so tight... fuck." "Don't be shy now, bitch, tell me how much you love it." "You can take it, honey... shit."
꩜ Absolutely loves cumming inside, you're on the pill or can't get pregnant? Even better. This man is a risk taker. But he loves how messy it can get when he comes on your stomach, back, or face. God it's like he's claiming you as his in his mind.
꩜ I don't want to touch on him eating pussy, only because if we were thinking REALISTICALLY this man does NOT know how to eat pussy, but that doesn't mean he won't at least TRY. But since he's fictional and I like to indulge myself, he at least knows enough to make you squirm, gripping onto his hair, crying out his name, etc etc. And it makes him so fucking hard.
꩜ (If I REALLY wanted to be self indulgent though) On those nights where he'll cave just enough to let you be more dominant, he'll call you mommy. Moan it so breathlessly into your ear to the point where you're light headed, god and he would sound so pathetic while saying it, voice almost cracking, cheeks flushed, eyes lidded. He'd look so beautiful, neck covered in hickeys, lips wet from hurried kisses.
#nam gyu#squid game#nam gyu x reader#nam gyu smut#nam gyu reader insert#nam gyu x you#squid game x reader#squid game reader insert#teehee#violet writes#violets headcanons
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#why no one told me that trying to get in the “grown up life” is so stressful when you have zero experience in a real work#All the skills you have are not enough#At the same time you didn't have rest at all after graduating because of the outside pressure#And I feel like I became deadly annoying#Let me complain a little bit I swear to god this is like 2 time after college when I want to complain at something I'm not that strong#What do you mean there is no sign “We want YOU as our worker!” ahagsha funny#I have to learn about 2 new programms on a basic level at least#Learn new things on Toon Boom#Prepare different portfolios when turns out I barely have something I can show#I was thinking too little and now I barely can think and I start being irritated at myself yet can do nothing since my brain rebels#Okayyy just 2 more months to see if something will turns out good out of what I will be doing
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POTES GETS TRAUMATISED BY KOTOR!
i was gonna part 2 of this when I got to the end but i got to That Bit™ this morning and i need to tell everyone ever (im aware im probably towards the end of the game now but still plz dont spoil i assume theres more insane shit to come!!)
without further ado, sessions 7-9:
seven rhymes w revan so they better show tf up now
this game is so pretty esp when you land the ship
CARTH HAD A WIFE AND SON?????? CHRIST POOR GUY SAUL SUCKS
omg they never found the son that feels potentially relevant
'they didnt send a master bc itd draw too much attention' bastila, malak is obsessed with u rn i think that mission has been failed
wow so the council sent juhani with me just bc my vibes are so great
i might sound completely batshit insane for this but with all these redemption themes/talks i keep thinking abt 1. the fact i was so certain u played as revan 2. that revan is never given pronouns like ur supposed to pick their pronouns and 3. i have amnesia and im good at being a jedi (+ they clearly know smthn i dont). im not gonna say it bc i will look incredibly stupid if im wrong but do u pick up my theory. do u pick up what im putting down
ok that feels like the biggest reach in history PLEASE IM CLEARLY GOING CRAZY JUST SHOW ME REVANNN PLEASEEEEEEEE
i don’t even know if i have amnesia tbh but nobody’s given me a chance to prove i don’t
they could just be trying to make revan extra mysterious w the pronouns. i think im talking to carth too much, him not trusting anyone is making me not trust the game now im worried the lack of pronouns is there to hide their identity for some betrayal LMAO
oop i thought bringing zaalbar would be a good idea but apparently hes an exile. great
is stopping slavery even the jedi way cause qui-gonn sure as shit didnt do that in tpm
ZAALBAR'S DAD IS CHIEF??
i should bring Mission on this meet-zaalbar's-dad thing but shes 14 and i dont want to bring her into active combat scenarios ok
ok zaalbar's dad WAS chief. odds on him being this 'mad-claw'
A JEDI?
a grouchy hermit jedi!!!
why am i allowed to use the computer what previous user would make it usable for ME?????? SUSPICIOUS
what if im a wattpad character and revan is my older sibling or cousin
this is star wars, The Family Drama Franchise, im not ruling out that theyre my dad. my woke nonbinary dad
I LOVE THIS BUILDERS MYSTERY WHO TF WERE THEY. THEY MADE KASHYYK A FOREST!!! THEYRE SO COOL!!! I LOVE AN ANCIENT PEOPLES MYSTERY
was the builders my evil dad is this like assassins creed (everyone else has parental issues i'll feel left out if i don't have any)
big fan of how creepy the forest mandos are
im fighting little beasties and a massive beastie. this is just like jfo
well we dealt with a planet of slavers and helped with Zaalbar's daddy issues, now it's time to go to a new planet of slavers and help with Bastila's mummy issues!!!
DARTH BANDON (ill call him brandon out of disrespect) SHOWED UP AND IMMEDIATELY THREW A RANDOM GUARD INTO A TERMINAL INJURING 2 OTHERS. AND HE LOOKS LIKE AN EVIL SIMS 2 TOWNIE bet hes lowkey mid
malak you will never replace your best friend revan with this brandon fucker. and revan is going to be MY best friend soon when i find them
massive fan of how imperial tatooine looks near the same as it did in kotor 4000 years ago. this planet is the true no.1 shithole ever
btw the 8th fast n furious was called f8 of the furious
im still so scared that revan's pronoun sitch means they're gonna be someone i know like what if revan is already my best friend CAN SOMEONE JUST TELL ME I DONT HAVE AMNESIA SO I CAN RELAX AND AT LEAST RULE OUT THE CRACK THEORY OF ME BETRAYING MYSELF
whatever let's think about the fact i'm on the sand shithole. fuck this star map bastila where's your mum i want some soap opera drama
WHY DOES EVERYWHERE CHARGE ME 100 CREDITS
tatooine used to be a lush green planet??? arrakis who?
omg this guy knows carth does everyone on tatooine know my friends
HIS SON IS W THE SITH??????
'he must be a man by now' how old are you carth i thought you were like 30 at most. carth were you a child bride
when are we gonna run into someone who knows ME so i can dispute the amnesia allegations
AH! BASTILA'S BITCH-MUM JUST ASKED ME IF I TALK TO MY MOTHER LIKE THAT AND I GOT OPTIONS!! IS THIS EVIDENCE AGAINST MY AMNESIA???? AM I A REAL CHARACTER??????? GET IN!!! I HAD A MOTHER
i love how bastila n her mum havent seen each other in presumably like 20 years and yet their reunion was so immediately hostile
or more than 20 years who knows how old any of my companions are carth apparently has an adult son!!!
the only person i can trust is mission who is for sure 14 and the old men who are old man aged
thank god there was a guy who immediately told me the nonlethal option for the tuskens i thought i was gonna have to search for it
just did baby's first savescum cause i accidentally picked a dark side option and my friends were sad LOL
THE WAY HK47 SAID "shall i kill something for you? (:" LMAO IM IN LOVE W IT ALREADY
LMAOO HK IS ALMOST ALL THE WAY INTO THE DARK SIDE METER
having bastila and hk at the same time feels like having an angel and a devil on my shoulder every time they chime in on dialogue
i love them
MEATBAGS
"would you rather be caught with contraband that is very illegal or just a little illegal" "whats the difference" "about 20 years, master" HE IS MY FAVOURITE
love getting the murderdroid to do peace negotiations
hilarious that we're negotiating in our underwear
tatooine really makes you realise that this game is a walking simulator
LETS GO FIGHT A DRAGON
but respectfully. bc im a jedi
fun fact if you walk straight into the cave without using the hunter guy's mines then you will die and have to reload your save. not saying i know this from experience bc i just did exactly that and died or anything it's just a random fact i know
dragon: exploded
DARTH BRANDON??!??!?!?!
NOW TELL ME WHERE REVAN IS YOU SHITBRICKED SON OF A BITCH ok hes dead he cant tell me anything
bastila is drawn to landmines like a moth to a flame she loves getting exploded by them
BASTILA'S MUMMY ISSUES: SOLVED
i should be an intergalactic family issues counsellor. my character could've solved vaderkin and luke's whole thing in less than one film
bastila just PAID ME A COMPLIMENT INSTEAD OF NAGGING ME! CALL THE UH-- i guess star wars doesnt have the vatican just uhhh idk tell yoda when he's born
i love this game bc you get a very distinct feeling that they pulled '4000 years' out of a hat and didnt think about how the buildings or technology would be different. in 4000 years all that's changed on tatooine is how many towns there are but i guess it's the law of diminishing returns or whatever
WE’RE BEING TRACTOR-YOINKED???
why are we in our underwear. saul you pervert
what history between us
WHAT HISTORY SAUL. WHAT HISTORY
WHAT HISTORY?!!!!!!?!!????
what does he MEAN my loyalties are switching WHAT FUCKING HISTORYY
LMAOOO you can say the academy was on alderaan instead of dantooine thats such a good anh reference
THE JEDI ON DANTOOINE HAVE BEEN KILLED?!!?!!!! WHAT IM NO LONGER LMAO-ING
WHAT THE HELL CAN I HAVE A SECOND TO PROCESS EVERYTHIN
sorry carth i got you soooo electrocuted it was for the republic tho
seriously WHAT THE DANTOOINE JEDI CANT BE DEAD LIKE ??????? what????? no??? master tortimer???
LMAOOO HALF NAKED JOLEE IS GONNA KILL A SHIP
NAKED OLD MAN RAMPAGE LETS GOO!!
this is good we should get out of here but also can we ask saul and malak what the fuck he meant by history
presumably?? i was a sith before?? my amnesiacs??? like that seems certain going off saul's comments
god if the crack theory was right im gonna cry i dont even want to think abt the implications of that
at least my amnesia has been semi-confirmed. or i have an evil twin
LMAO JOLEE HAS NO ARMOUR PROFICIENCY ALL HE CAN WEAR IS HIS UNDIES. NAKED OLD MAN RAMPAGE CONTINUES!
“i have an army” “we have a naked old man”
rip naked old man times i have my equipment back
bastila thinks we can't fight malak but i literally have grenades we'll be fine
also i want to talk to him what the fuck did saul mean we had history. is MALAK my evil dad??? (i dont want 2 think abt the alternative option)
IM IN SPACE!!!!! IN A SPACE SUIT
what the hell do they put in these star wars games man, kotor is reaching jfo/js levels of "basically coke for me"
i cant think of a session nine pun i just wanna play it
CONTINUING ON FROM BEING IN SPACE LETS GO PUNCH SAUL IN SPACE
the crack theory can't be right its just a crack theory i'm not. like im just a normal woman i cant be ya know. i dont even wanna say it
SAUL PLEASE TELL ME I DONT HAVE AMNESIAAA
omg YES WE GET TO KILL SAUL!! GAME OF THE YEAR!!
HES ALIVE WHAT THE FUCK DID HE TELL YOU CARTH. WHAT THE FUCK DID THE WHOLE JEDI COUNCIL KNOW
CAN YOU GUYS TELL ME
WHY IS THE ONLY DIALOGUE OPTION LET'S MOVE ON. I DONT WANT TO MOVE ON TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK YOU GUYS ARE TALKING ABOUT
ah! malak! you bitch!
REUNION? VENGEANCE?? OH GOD NO
NO
ITS SHOWING ME THE EVIDENCE
OH IT WAS CARTH WHO SAID ABT THE MEMORY WIPING IT WASNT A LOADING SCREEN TIP
NO
WHAT
NO??????????? NO
IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A CRACK THEORY IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A CRAZY REACH I WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BE RIGHT
OH MY GOD OH MY GOD
wow revan (my???) eyes are fucked up
AGH HE CALLED ME REVAN
OH MY GOD
I WAS ALWAYS PLAYING AS REVAN
THIS WHOLE TIME. I WAS NEVER PLAYING AS SOME RANDOM CLOWN WHO IVE GROWN TO LOVE AS A CHARACTER. I WAS ALWAYS PLAYING AS REVAN
WHY IS THERE NOT A DIALOGUE OPTION TO HAVE A PANIC ATTACK I NEED TO HAVE A PANIC ATTACK
FUCK MAN ILL HAVE ONE IN REAL LIFE AT THIS RATE THERES NO WAY
i dont feel like im abt to cry but i kind of want to cry anyway what the HELL MAN
IT GETS WORSE EVERY TIME HE CALLS ME REVAN IM IN MROE AND MORE SHOCK
LIKE IVE BEEN PHYSICALLY GASPING ON REPEAT N SAYING NO OUT LOUD. IF I WAS HOME ALONE I THINK ID BE SCREAMING
there has got to be a speneva (space geneva) convention against this this seems so illegal
i literally cannot work out if this is better or worse than death. tbh it is death like the body lives but they stole my fucking brain man what the hell BASTILA I THOUGHT WE WERE FUCKING FRIENDS
oh my god she said "to capture revan… to capture you" WHY DOES IT HURT MORE WHEN MY FRIEND BASTILA CALLS ME REVAN
STOP CALLING ME REVAN MY NAME IS LEALA MACHAI THATS THE NAME IVE HAD FOR THE LAST 16 HOURS THATS MY NAME SHUT UP SHUT UP
NO STOP CALLING ME REVAN BASTILA!!!!
malaks a fuckin pussy he keeps running away
WHAT NO BASTILA DONT SACRIFICE YOURSELF DONT DO THAT STOP BASTILA WE CAN TAKE HIM IVE BEEN BEATING HIM 1V1 HES FUCKING EASY TO FIGHT COME BACK
NO I DONT WANT TO LEAVE HER!!!!!!! THATS;. SHE LIED TO ME BUT SHES STILL MY FRIEND BASTILA NO CARTH I DONT WANT TO LEAVE HER I NEED TO TALK TO HER
jesus mary joseph and the little donkey im revan. what the hell. im revan
this whole time
JOLEE IS STILL NAKED LMAO
yes mission! yes i love you yes it just matters who i am now yes exactly
CARTH DONT CALL ME REVAN I WILL START CRYING
thank you mission and zaalbar youre real ones
THANK U CANDEROUS
jolee knew but im not pissed off he wanted me to find out on my own and it wasnt his place to say, candy-o respects my/revan’s defeating his ppl and is the first person to make revan not sound like a slur
HK WAS MY DROID THIS WHOLE TIME?? HE WAS MY ASSASSIN DROID???????? LMAO AMAZING ok i feel less bad i can be revan if it means hk was mine all along
omg yay that means i DID run into someone i knew on tatooine just like carth and bastila!
tatooine must be crazy to do as the last planet lmao like does hk immediately go WADDUP MASTER and you cant even solve bastila's mummy issues bc shes not there. good thing i already did it
LMAOO CANDEROUS BEING LIKE girl its the force anything can happen its not just convenient
am i the force's specialest girl
yay carth listened to everyone and UNDERSTOOD THAT WHATEVER SHOCK HES FEELING I AM FEELING IT MUCH MUCH WORSE GODDAMNIT
agh no what the hell i just have to go about my day now?? i just have to work now????? until i can play the rest later?? when that just happened???????? i need bereavement leave
ive closed the game but im just blankly staring at my computer screen. what the hell. what the hell man
i have never felt so violated and traumatised by a bunch of pixels
somehow it feels worse that i basically clocked it but then was immediately like nahhh thats an insane reach, anyway! like somehow that feels worse than if i'd just never thought it was a possibility
what the fuck man what the fuck
POTES SEMI-LIVEBLOGS KOTOR!
ive been writing my thoughts in the notes app but due to popular demand (one person asked for it) i'm posting my liveblogging DO NOT SAY/TAG/COMMENT SPOILERS PLEASE i read tags
warning im a yapper, im 10 hours in and theres a lot already (separated into sessions):
SESSION 1
whos this clown i thought i would be playing as revan
ive been too spoiled by dragon age origins this character creator sucks ass
only human???? ): fr?? ill just imagine her different in my brain or some shit
my life is being mansplained to me. is this bad writing or do i have amnesiacs
hes meta now??? hes talking abt the screen controls?????
omg a jedi and an evil jediii
omg their asses suckedddd they both died immediately
i <3 bringing a sword to a gun fight
WHY R THERE SO MANY SITH WHERE IS TJE RULE OF TWO
i clicked a workbench and it said lightsaber so either i get a lightsaber or i get a jedi friend whose lightsaber i can steal if im careful
I assume u play as revan in kotor2 so im gonna buy that now so i can play it when im done playing w this clown
i got light side points im getting a good grade in game morality which is something both normal to want and possible to achieve
everyone keeps saying revan is dead but thats my friend revan from tumblr hes clearly alive. or they???
my characters ass is distractingly present onscreen
huge fan of the way everyone collapsed drunk what the FUCK was in that wine
ok these sith ppl might be the bad guys but their armour is DRIPPY AS FUCK
ideologically i dont agree w the sith but they kinda went off w the fits
googling how to become a sith without being evil cause they have Drip
SESSION 2
i paid £1.19 to see revan he better show up in this game at some point
all these sith n i still cant find one revan….. stop faking ur death rn come out n talk to me babygirl this isnt like u….
why can i be light/dark side if im not a jedi. give me a laser sword
maybe this jedi gyal will know where revan is faking his death. or give me a fuckin lightsaber PLEASEEE
was just thinking 'does this game have romance' and then carth called me beautiful. i dont think im gonna romance anyone until i get this amnesia sorted
why is carth questioning me so much abt the crash im pretty sure i have amnesia
why tf did the jedi lady have me transferred to this ship are we in lesbians with each other???
carth's not wrong it is suspicious but i lowkey have amnesia so i coulda done that i coulda not
a lot of clone wars voice actors in this. was lucasfilm so broke in the 2000s that they could only afford the same 3 VAs for every project
mission is 14??????? we need to get my girl back in school
SESH 3
tale as old as time i fucking suck at racing games
ok i didnt realise you had to mash click i won
REVAN!!! REVAN!!!!!!!!!
why am i dreaming abt revan tho. real as hell but ?????
lmao cringe revan getting blown up. i thought the jedi beat rev-meister in a fight but no. accident
"such visions are often a sign of force sensitivity" COOL YAY GIVE ME A LIGHTSABER
BASTILLE LOST HER FUCKING LIGHTSABER??
CARTH IS RIGHT THATS LIKE DAY ONE JEDI SHIT. ok i still love her even tho shes a bit of a bitch and also doesnt have a saber
if we find a lightsaber im taking it first tho
whys carth getting weird abt me being weird that he doesnt trust me. i just wanna be friends mate
SESH IV: A NEW HOPE
'i mean no disrespect, but perhaps one of the male slaves could serve you better' i went in here to start a slave revolution and instead got called a lesbo
LMAO THERES A SPICE LAB???? WALTER WHITE WHERE ARE YOU
thats insaneee they blew up BILLIONS of people to get to one jedi?????? these sith arent fucking around theyre scary
UM THIS IS CRAZY GRAPHICS THE LIGHTING IS CLEARER/DARKER WHEN I COVER THE SUN W THE SHIP EDGE?? 2003 IS THE YEAR OF THE FUTURE
someone just called me padawan i kinda assumed i was in my late 20s do i just have baby vibes
all the jedi in the movies are so chill but every kotor jedi i've met so far has been a bit of a bitch
YO THEY HAVE A YODA!!! its not THE yoda but
cool so these guys are just the regional managers at best. your asses are not the council
why can everyone smell my force juju so strong
THATS STRAIGHT UP YODA'S CLONE WARS VA
why does fake yoda not blink both eyes at the same time. im calling him master tortimer he reminds me of the animal crossing mayor
bastila there was no need for such a fancy bow
malak is like evil aang
revan is so much shorter than malak omg
are me and bastila sharing dreams. are we both obsessed w revan
poor mission ):
WHAT WAS MASTER TORTIMER ABT TO SAY????????? EVER SINCE WHEN??? DID WE KNOW EACH OTHER BEFORE MY AMNESIACS????? DID BASTILA TELL U SMTHN MORE WHEN I WASNT IN THE ROOM???
im intrigued i like this whole hidden jedi shtick its very compelling. so is whatever theyre hiding from me
kinda surprising no jedi found me before tho given my force juju is so strong
IM A LEGIT JEDI NOW??? SICK!!!
does revan rlly not have pronouns i thought that was a tumblr thing but they straight up are a nonbinary icon ive never heard a single pronoun used. revan's pronouns are revan/revan's
damn revan seems so cool in these stories (charismatic war hero that convinced their troops to join them as conqueror?? julius caesar) and yet all we've seen them do onscreen is get blown up and die by accident
A YEAR AGO? the way they were talking i assumed revan died like. a week before the game started
master uh i forgot his name he has martin scorcese vibes said revan was a paragon of the jedi so what im getting is that all jedi gifted kids turn evil
even if i didnt know revan as a tumblr darling id KNOW revan has to be alive somewhere they way everyone talks abt them is too cool for a character who exploded and died. i think. i hope. I PAID £1.19 TO MEET REVAN
'only you and bastila can stop malak' seriously????? just us two?? ive been a jedi for like, 6 minutes and you guys keep calling bastila young???? do you guys not wanna help??
omg im getting carth to traumadump! <3
HE WAS ON REVAN'S ARMY>??
i totally knew the jedi code and did not have to google it whatsoever
they rlly said fuck going to illum heres a crystal from the bin
he told me id be a great sentinel and i was like i know but i want blue cause i dont wanna be matchies with bastila
OGH!!! I HAVE A LIGHTSABER!!!! THIS IS GAME OF THE YEAR!!!!
omg i made my lightsaber perfectlyyy which is rare <3 getting a good grade in jedi
maybe i was a travelling lightsaber salesman before my amnesia
seriously though WHO was i everyone's kinda stopped acting like i have amnesia since the first mission BUT IVE PLAYED DRAGON AGE THAT GIVES YOU OPPORTUNITIES TO RP UR PAST. THIS DOESNT. EITHER THIS GAME IS BAD (but i love it so its not) OR I HAVE RETROGRADE AMNESIA
also everyone keeps being like "Oh ur force juju is so strong" AND NOBODY FOUND ME TIL NOW??? suspicious. did getting a really bad concussion activate the force in me
im too confused and amnesiac'd to think abt anything except the fact i have a glowing stick now
FSESH FIVE:
big fan of using aliens to avoid having to get VAs to read every line
oh so carth's boyfriend saul betrayed him and became leader of the sith fleet so he has trust issues
well he needs to calm down. i can't betray him cause i dont know what the fuck is happening
yooo i love the design differences on the mandalorians
oh my god this lady wanted to fuck her droid cause it was her husband's. and then it killed itself. wtf. game of the year tho
wtf they jebaited this juhani person into going dark side but then i talked her out of it. that seems a bit mean of them
i hope she can join my party she looks too unique to be a random npc
ive been thinking and I might be going crazy but there was a loading screen tip ages ago that said jedis could wipe ppl's mind and all i thought at the time was 'fuck the shitshow acolyte didnt make that up'. but what if one of them wiped MY memory and i used to be a jedi or smthn ????????
cause they keep being like ur weirdly good at this??? did bastila steal my memories??????????
I KNOW I HAVE AMNESIA!! EVEN IF EVERYONE DOESN'T BRING IT UP BC THEYRE PROBABLY TRYING TO SAVE MY FEELINGS
if i dont have amnesia and im just deeping the fact the opening had my life being mansplained then im gonna look real stupid
anyway time 2 go to the fuckshit ruins cave where r-dog and malak went to
"it must be referring to revan. the dark lord and malak--" revan's pronouns are revan/thedarklord
bastila said theres no mention of the Builders in the archives. does she just know every text off by heart
THIS DROID IS 20K YEARS OLD ???
omg i can equip 2 lightsabers at once. game of the year
OK I TAKE BACK EVERYTHING I SAID ABOUT THE AMNESIA BASTILA IS ASKING ME QUESTIONS ABOUT MY BACKGROUND THAT I CAN ANSWER. I REPEAT I DO NOT HAVE AMNESIA
ok i didnt get choices and i didnt really uh… say anything that i didnt already get told im still not ruling out amnesia
also booo i didnt get to find out how old i was
master tortimer rlly looks like the ultimate ketamine yoda
LMAO THERE WAS A DIALOGUE OPTION 2 CALL JUHANI A CATGIRL
omg kashyyk from jedi fallen order!!!
I CAN UPGRADE MY LIGHTSABER THIS IS JUST LIKE JFO
omg this ship is fun i wish everyone had personalised bunk spaces like hfw… a game which came out 19 years after this i should probably just take what we have
im gonna start w manaan cause im p sure thats what B-dog said n its the same language the droid was speakin
omg hyperspace from star wars
THE GUY THE BUILDING FELL ON???
am i having dreams abt revan bc bastila killed revan and im connected to her this is so roundabout
maybe i'd sleep better if my ponytail wasnt clipping into the pillow
[kiwi accent] six
carth needs a xanax every time i think we're friends he stops trusting me
also lmao he actually pointed out how wild it was that a day one padawan is being sent on this uber important mission and HES RIGHT IT IS WEIRD!! i thought it was main character logic but he's calling it out
i really really like the sense of unease that's setting in like at first i thought it was just cause im not used to 2003 games but no this is on purpose bc carth my friend carth keeps calling it out
THERE IS A CHILD ON MY SHIP ??????????????????
lmao the representative for menaan is roland wann. its like poetry it rhymes
there are no cameras in the sith hangar <3 rookie error i can commit crimes now
bastila's favourite hobby is getting shot and walking into my grenades
this isnt a combat system this is a missing system
I GOT ARRESTED???? IM JUST A GIRL
nvm i had a datapad that said the sith were evil so theyve let me go free and we're besties
why do i feel like ive just walked into an underwater horror mission
this suit waddles at the speed of a penguin on fentanyl
i tamed the beastie this is like how to train your dragon
MALAK FIRED ON REVAN?????? WERENT THEY BEST FRIENDS???????
but maybe revan escaped when bastila wasnt looking THEYRE FINE THEYRE OUT THERE SOMEWHERE. I BELIEVE
so hopefully when we run into revan they'll be like agh i changed my ways cause of the being shot thing and they'll be my bestie
great news i successfully communicated w the ship child and gave her back to dantooine. my girl has shockingly good linguisitics skills
bastila is so dour "oh watch out for the dark side" GIRL I AM. I NEED TO GET THE BEST GRADE IN GAME MORALITY
ok OFF TO KASHYYK i hope cal kestis is there… thru the force i guess… bc he wont be born for another 4000 years but its whatever
omg you'll never guess what. another vision. wow its one of the thangs. cool this is a tomorrow me problem
#going off the comments and the fact im at what i assume is the third act i think this playthrough will be less than 29 hours lmao#cause im 16-17 hours in and i assume korriban and whatever comes next wont take me 12 hours total LOL#i always finish games quicker than how long to beat says its my one single gamer skill#kotor#knights of the old republic#swkotor#talk is cheap
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i've been so miserable lately but at least i still enjoy music and learning
#i actually don't think i can put up with people rn#and that's more on me#but some of it is also frustration with other peoples attitudes#mine might not be good but at least i'm trying to still have compassion#i'm really trying rn and i feel like i'm stuck#thank god for being an academic weapon#but i genuinely feel like i'm undergoing too many changes at once and it's scary and i don't want to be around people!!#i feel like i've lately been concerning myself with others a lot#but all of a sudden now i'm worried about MYSELF and how i'm changing and i'm not the same person as i was even a few minutes ago#i don't rly know who i am#the fact that i still have the same values is very very comforting but otherwise i feel like shit#i've been happy but there's like an underlying melancholia throughout me this week it's so lame#ugh ok shutting tf up now#ceri.txt
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depression is really weird actually wdym i spent 2.5 years of my life in bed
#and wdym that lifestyle changed so quickly into being out and about and an active member of the world??#very proud of myself#and i mean it wasn't that quick of a change#it was like 1.5 years primarily depression bedrotting with occasional school -> primarily depression bedrotting ->#primarily depression bedrotting with 3-9 hours of work weekly -> straight into 31+ hours school+9-12 hours work weekly#so there was somewhat of a gradual progression#but still#also wowza i wake up 7-7:30am every morning now. 1pm was an early wake up for a not so insignificant amount of time#i mean of all fundamental growth years to miss out on the ages like what 12/13-15 aren't too bad? they would suck in a different way if i#had been socially involved#anyway it's just. yea i'm proud of myself but it is a crazy lifestyle change#and even when i was deeply depressed in a horrible routine i feel like i learned a lot. how to regulate my emotions and cope well and find#the joy in everything. bc if i stayed in bed all day then i would at least be happy about the sun or whatever#and for the while of being not at school at all i WANTED to be at school i just could not find one bc our school system is so cute like tha#(basically every school is at capacity and the local school that has a guaranteed place for me would have been an all boys or girls 😭)#but i miraculously found and got into this school and miraculously made it work so well for me socially and now academically#it's also a good time to get back into school for my education bc any later and it woulda been pretty bad for all my certifications and uni#ive missed out on so much maths that its not worth it to me to try and catch up but my teacher knows that#but ive always hated maths regardless i only ever understood it for the first half of yr 7 then my attendance dropped#and after my recent exam i decided to try harder at school. but i still got an A on the exam i didn't study for!! academic weapon fr#i'm just idk thinking back to myself in the past few years#and how hopeless it all felt. but i got out of it!! i beat the depression and social anxiety and found a good place and made the most of it#and during the peak of my depression i remember i went out someplace near my old school and panicked so so badly about seeing#kids from my old school. and the friends at the time didnt really check on me when i went to shake and cry in a side street lmao#i kept the best of that friendgroup and have better friends now. but anyway now i take a bus each morning with some kids from my old school#and you see these hands? they look like they're shaking to you?#anyway yeah it's just cool i got to this point :) i really had no hope for so long but now i have a life i'm living and a future i'm build#--ing towards#which is funny i just decided some random day last november after watching some better call saul 'huh actually lawyer would b pretty cool'#and will i get there? we'll see but i do have hope now
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I should have been born a frog. I should have been born a frog. I should have been born a frog. I should have been born a frog. I should have been born a frog. I should have been born a frog. I should have been
#us elections#us politics#election 2024#i talked to an older friend today and he helped a lot#being with people helps#reminding myself that people care helps#47.5% of people in the usa care#which is a minority but at least it's close enough of a minority to a coin flip that i can always find good people#i am trying to be positive and not live out these last two months of peace in despair#being alone hurts more and i spent too much time today doomscrolling but i need some time to prepare for what i might see in the future#i do not want to make plans i do not want to make plans i should not NEED TO HAVE PLANS FOR A PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION#when i was 15 i had a whole plan for a novel i wanted to write. it was a whole carpe diem/memento mori about living life before it's over#it was going to be a good book. but now i'm not sure i believe in what i am saying enough to write it.#and i am not sure if it would be what the world needs.#but it would have been a good book. it would have been an amazing book and i didn't want to start because i didn't know how#and i wanted to wait until i had more writing and life experience to do it justice#and now i just don't have the OPTIMISM to do it justice and now it may never be written#moral of the story is write the thing NOW edit later make the thing now while you are still passionate about it existing#contrary to the contents of this post i am actually doing much better than i was this morning.#today an irl friend held my hand as i cried under a couch and an online friend reached out to make sure i am okay and i am not alone.#a lot of it is cold comfort. but at least i am regaining some faith in humanity. not all of it. i will never again have all of it.#but i will have enough.#i am a little more afraid of dying young than i was this morning and that is good. that is good.#i am not the only one who has lived through a historical event.#i will do a lot more tiredposting in the near future#especially as inauguration day comes up#but for now in the tags i feel at least a little better.#seraph rambles#seraph originals#side note: the content of the actual post is reminding me of otherkin back in like the 2010s lol remember when that was a thing on tumblr
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So this ask is genuinely unreadable so forgive me if I struggle with the following translation. I will mention here that, while I can go looking for sources on a lot of what I'm about to say, that would take a lot of time and effort that my dyslexic ass does not want to do. Feel free to look it up yourself. I'm already taking more time than I need to with this. Sorry about that. Hope it's all good that I did this.
TW: politics, gun violence (including schools), and I'm sure you can tell the rest from the above ask.
First off, I am an American citizen, so you, gloomwalkers, can't claim that I don't know because I'm not from the US. I learned the way you did, I just took it upon myself to listen to someone other than right-wingers who have everything to gain from my ignorance and stupidity.
Point one: I believe you're trying to say that Elon did not do the Sieg Heil? And also that our previous leaders have done the same - which was not a Sieg Heil but was worse than what Elon did because it makes you look better. I must say that I have no idea as to the context of the other photos (I guess you only wanted to provide Elon's?) And I would go searching for it but I do not know where to start with that and I don't feel like it so we're going to leave those accusations untouched as I am not doing my proper research.
The second one, however, we are going to talk about. Elon, at the very least, did an act that looked close to a Sieg Heil and then attempted to scrub it from the internet, not address it directly, and agree with multiple posts about how we should not be labeling people as Nazis, while having supported things that have been labeled akin to Nazism for years.
So I'm sure we can make a guess here. Not to mention that your context literally supports the claim you're arguing against. I suppose I should thank you for that. Makes my life easier.
And just to mention the "But he has autism" claims - so do I. And y'know what I do when my autism creates a situation in which I accidentally respond in a very bigoted manner? I apologize. I acknowledge my mistake and carry that around with me so I don't make it again. I do not go online and get mad about the fact that people are calling me out on my bullshit. I understand that all autistic people are different, but we are not incapable of learning or self-reflection and implying that we are is infantilizing and ableist.
Point two: do you... do you think that's a good thing? Do you think it's good that we allow hatred that will very likely end in violence fester and grow until it seeps into our laws and comes out as the situation we're dealing with now? Are you kidding me? Hate speech kills people. You realize that, right? You're good with that? Okay.
But onto our proof otherwise. A lot of people have been jailed for words. I know this is an old one, but the Sedition Act of 1918 literally made it so you could be jailed for up to twenty years for so much as denouncing a war. Also, for a more recent example, Briana Boston is currently jailed for telling a healthcare company "Delay, Deny, Depose, you people are next." Despite there being no proof that she would've done anything.
There are others, however I can't remember them and don't feel like research as I mentioned earlier so. Sorry.
Point three: did you like... get worse? With the grammar? Are you good? Do you need a doctor? That was genuinely concerning to read. Anyway, I guess I'll stop being condescending and respond. I'm trans. Hi! It's nice to meet you. That means that I Know Things. For example, I know that I have never been pressured to be trans. I have, however, been pressured to be cis. Do you care as much about that? I've had teachers ignore my pronouns - I'd say that is pushing an agenda. I've had a teacher tell me - to my face - that I should not be allowed in bathroom or sports - is that not pushing an agenda? Do you care about those?
The only agenda people using my correct pronouns are pushing is something called basic human respect and decency. It's a wonderful concept that you should look into. One of my favorites.
You would be correct. I can't force people to use my correct name or pronouns. It's not practical. But I believe that you're missing the part where this isn't a disliked nickname - something that is harmful and if you think that disregarding someone's wishes isn't a bad thing then, once again, are you good? Because this is concerning. Have you heard of empathy? I urge you to look into the basic human respect and decency I mentioned earlier. But more than that, this is that other concept that you don't believe in. Hate speech. That thing that literally kills people.
"[N]ext part of this is [you] wanting tax payers to fund trans medical issues that are not life threatening[. That] is not our way[,] not because they [are] trans but because they have no right to my money."
So we shouldn't pay for yearly check ups. Or X-rays, if we aren't positive the person will die without it. Also ear infections and appointments from them - that probably won't kill anyone. Dentistry. No one needs mental health help - yeah, my res stay was life-saving but we can't be sure that's the case with everyone and we need to run it by you, specifically, before we can be. Obviously those surgeries that greatly increase quality of life are useless. Our tax money is not to help the American people! Obviously. (/S, if it wasn't clear.)
"[A]lso th[re's] proof [that] this has been forced on kids ie people under 18 which is[,] in fact[,] grounds to remove and sue a teacher for forcing their views on kids at school."
So... I notice that you didn't source this? I actually did look this up (not in great length, I will admit) and I found two of ten articles discussing this point. One of them was from the POV of a mother, and the other was from known transphobic site Transgender Trend from the POV of a fourteen year old. This supports everything that I have both heard and experienced during my time at ten different schools. Four of them being on the west coast, tyvm. This also lines up with what my friends from different schools in different areas have experienced.
I'm trans because I'm trans, not because my teacher forced me to shave my head and do man things. In fact, I was a very feminine child. And yet... I'm still trans. Interesting.
I'm also confused as to the 180. I thought, at the beginning, you were talking about medical procedures - something that is almost exclusively done when it is abundantly clear that it will vastly improve quality of life for the minor. And if we're talking about that, then we must talk about how some people have joint surgeries or brain surgeries "forced on them" so we should definitely ban the use in children for those. Some children get their ears pierced without their permission! We need to stop this madness!
Or maybe you only care about trans people. Maybe you're just transphobic. Would you care to admit to that? It would make this conversation much shorter.
Point four:
"[Y]ou clearly listen to USA media[. W,]ell d[id] you know that ABC[,] NBC, CNN[, and] MSNBC all paid out 100s of millions of dollars in just 3 lawsuits for openly [lying] about the story and people in it. ABC even had pay Trump 15 million for a lie they told about Trump. [S]o frankly trusting them is not really an option[. E]ven [] liberals have had to admit they [were] wrong[.]"
I didn't even have to quote this one. I just needed to rewrite it because I physically could not understand it without doing so. I don't like to judge or shame people for literacy, it does nothing but make people feel bad, and this is genuinely painful. There are free grammar checkers online. The grammar makes this feel like a troll.
Anyway, you realize that there are more news sites than these? Again, I don't know anything about this besides that the lawsuits existed at some point. I do, however, know that Fox News has had lawsuits of the same caliber.
On a different note, allow me to just put this right here (https://app.adfontesmedia.com/chart/interactive - imbed wasn't working) for all your validity and bias checking needs.
Point five: Are we being legit right now? My right to my body without having to go through a legislature is a right. My right to my body without having to go through you is a right. My right to my body not being used as a political ploy is a right. And before you say shit about religion: I'm not religious. Keep religion off of my body when I am not religious. Okay? I have a right to religious freedom and taking away my rights based on someone else's religion isn't religious freedom.
And for your gun control point: Please, I beg you, set foot in a school the day after a child brought a firearm in his backpack. Set foot in a school the day after a child has been murdered. Set foot in a school and know that that could be you. That's not even mentioning mass murders by firearm or murders by firearm or the amount of children who accidentally shoot themselves or others because people can't be bothered to lock up their firearms.
When I was in in-person school, I had at least one threat to my school each year from first grade onwards. I had teachers stand at the front of my class and tell us their plan for if someone broke in. I had them tell us to shove books in our backpacks to protect ourselves if it ever happened.
I had a person literally come to school with a firearm in his bag.
Please. Tell me why we need more of these. Tell me why you won't listen to the easiest solution to our biggest problem. Tell me why I had to go to school, scared out of my mind, day after day, because you wanted your rights so badly while denying us ours'.
It is my right to go to school and come home in the afternoon. If your right to owning a literal death machine is invaded because of that, then maybe you shouldn't have had it in the first place.
This is proven to work. This would work. And yet you people act like it would never work and so you just send us your thoughts and prayers while we get to sit in our schools and wonder if we won't come home that night because we all know that fence and those locks won't protect us.
You were nothing but disrespectful that entire ask. I am not OP and I cannot speak on that part of it, but I can say that I understand your takes. The picture really showed where they come from.
You think that you are the center of the universe. Everyone outside of Texas doesn't need to be acknowledged or known or respected.
Your love of the country does not negate the hate you just spewed. You say no hate and yet you sent this. You read this. You think this. You say no hate and yet you just spoke against so many people.
No hate doesn't dispute this. You realize that, right? You can't say no offense and have something not be offensive.
I hope this helped you understand the points. No hate.
Thank you for your time.
Howdy, let me start off with no hate for you just here trying to help clear up a few things it seems from your post you dont know which is normal since you no a US citizen. again just trying to help you understand not an attack just trying help. 1 on the whole nazi wave https://www.tumblr.com/busterballsblog/773398848248987648?source=share also post is not the full clip here https://youtu.be/5e5Dz2EvuOY?si=NPvB0sq5Qjk2NHDK these should help you better see the whole story and facts. 2 UK, CA, GR,FR all have hate speech as a legal thing in the USA its already been ruled by highest court and even liberal judges agreed no such thing as hate speech in this USA. where each of the nations i listed have jailed people based on their words some where even jokes on stage. but in USA we have the right to say anything but a DIRECT call to action. but just as we each have the right of free speech means all sides have a voice to say as they wish. something that very different our rights listed out in black and white cant be taken away by government for any reason where yours and UK, FR and GR can and have been in name of "Greater Good". in USA its about the 1 not the Greater Good when it comes to rights. 3 on whole trans topic here the the issue its illegal to force someone to talk a set way in the usa. just as your name is Erica you cant force people to call you that they can say HEY YOU or they can call you E all they want and no law is broken in the USA. next part of this is wanting tax payers to fund trans medical issues that are not life threatening is not our way not because they trans but because they have no right to my money. also their proof this has been forced on kids ie people under 18 which is in fact grounds to remove and sue a teacher for forcing their views on kids at school. 4 you clearly listen to USA media well do you know that ABC , NBC, CNN , MSNBC all paid out 100s of millions of dollars in just 3 lawsuits for openly lied about the story and people in it. ABC even had pay Trump 15 million for a lie they told about Trump. so frankly trusting them is not really an option even for liberals have had to admit they wrong. 5 you bring up removing of rights https://www.archives.gov/founding-docs/bill-of-rights-transcript please take a look at our rights and can you link abortions to any right you see listed. ( i am assuming this is right you talking about due to your words. mind you while your looking at our rights look at 2A and then notice how liberals seek to remove rights on guns. i use this as example of how the very view that the right seeks to take away rights is not based in any logic and in fact the left is seeking to remove a right openly. again i hope this helps you understand our system in a fair and balanced way. btw i been from quebec to toronto i will say being that im Texan i understand qubec people the best in CA i have a number of pals up their and yea. to give you idea why people like me love your snow is my city just got 3 inches of snow that all the snow we gotten since 2018 and my summers are 110 F or in the 40s C in the shade with 100% humidity. anyway hope this helps you understand better again no hate just trying to help and i will leave you with how Texans see the rest of north America LOL hope you enjoy the fun joke again no hate just trying help you smile. and if you have any question here or DM me is fine just trying share some help.
^^ I give you, the American education system
Look, I disagree with everything you are saying.
If you want to talk about taking rights away, I'll give you this. A lot of pregnant women have died recently because the hospitals are not able to perform abortions. Today, there was a school shooting in Nashville that killed a 17 year old and injured another. If abortions were legal, and you have gun laws in place that weren't written in the 17th century, many people would still be alive. This isn't opinion, this is fact.
Deaths in Canada caused by guns in 2023: less than 300
Deaths in USA caused by guns in 2023: over 43,000
There's honestly too much wrong with your entire message. I don't think I'm the right person to respond so I will leave it to everyone else.
Also, just so you are aware, your "map" did not make me laugh. It offends me. Canada is my home and I would much rather live here (with free healthcare, gun laws that weren't written over 200 years ago, the right for me to make a decision on my own body, and a place where my transgender friends are free to be who they are) than live in fucking texas.
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Colleague called me a Luddite today because I wrote the abstract for a book chapter submission by hand without using ChatGPT
#I just sort of let him talk about AI for awhile and why he thinks it's the future of academia#He ended up saying it's because he wants to keep working at uni but he has no publications#And get this: doesn't like writing. So.#I guess of course AI seems like the holy grail for people who don't know how to write#Like it just really struck me that the root of his AI obsession is insecurity#He even made a joke that I'm skipping journals and going straight to book chapters#I guess since it's my first year?#And he's been there 3 years and has no publications. Same with the other guy in our conversation#But it's like. Idk. I like trying new things. I never said it was a GOOD abstract and I don't know if it'll be accepted#But at least I'm trying. With my own words.#Personal#I *like* writing things with my own words. It makes me feel powerful#I don't want to use AI to produce 100 papers about the same batch of research (his fantasy)#I want a handful of papers which I can be proud to say I wrote myself#And most of all? I want to enjoy my work. I enjoy my research#I don't want my job to become an internet content mill#So I'll probably remain a Luddite
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Regardless of the strange formatting of the bullet points (for which you already apologized in the tags, I noticed), this is a very good justification!
I'm especially convinced by the "convoluted plan is a trial" part. It's embarrassing that I didn't notice it myself, because when I first watched episode 15, I remember thinking that following the beggars was very risky for Grabowski. But somehow, I never considered that this was the whole point — a filter meant to scare away anyone without the right conviction.
And you make fair point with how the homeless were probably much more socially marginalized and ignored back in those days. I'm not too educated on history, but at least from the way they're depicted in Orb, the beggars seem like pariahs.
I did wonder whether Badeni was hoping that the tattoo's would survive a long time and be discovered much later, but I think that's too much of a long shot. Like I already mentioned, shorter life-spans and higher mortality. But then again, it was always a far-fetched plan, so maybe Badeni really was counting on a miracle.
The only thing that still irks me, I guess, is why rely solely on the beggars? I feel like if a plan has such low chances of working, why not enact multiple plans just to be safe? He could have hidden a paper copy as a backup, hoping that somebody other than Grabowski finds it accidentally. It would be even less likely than Grabowski following the beggars, but it doesn't hurt to try.
Hubert (or Rafał - actually, it was probably Rafał) did something pretty similar when he carved the constellation into the rocks. He hoped that a discerning astronomer would coincidentally find his writing - and it worked. That's how the information passed from Rafał to Oczy and Gras.
I guess the lack of paper copies is less an issue with Badeni's plan, and more a fundamental problem in the premise of the show itself.
In theory, if the concept + evidence for heliocentrism were boiled down to their barest essentials, they could probably be summarized in a short pamphlet of less than 10 pages, which could then be copied by hand dozens of times. Those pamphlets could then be hidden in all sorts of places: ones where they're likely to be discovered (inside houses, studies, libraries, etc.) and ones where they're not so likely to be discovered (in stone chests out in the wilderness). Hopefully, this would help the idea spread in the short-term, while keeping it safe from extermination in the long-term.
Even the inquisition (at least the way it's depicted in Orb) would be tricked by this strategy. If you're captured, you can just lead them to one of the copies and destroy it, while pretending it was the only one.
I feel that this simple idea - "simplify the theory into a short text, then make lots and lots of copies" - is so inherently overpowered, that the mangaka had no choice but to ignore it, and draw as little attention to it as possible. Though, I guess they have to address it now with Draka, as she gears up to make Oczy's book available to the masses. She even points out how copying the manuscript by hand would be too laborious — which is fair for a 60 page book meant to be read by thousands, but would be much less convincing if it was a 4 page pamphlet that only needs to be copied, say, 20 times.
Anyway, I'm not gonna harp on about this. It's not worth losing sleep over, even if it's a slight contrivance in an otherwise great show. And it's not like other aspects of Orb aren't contrived - I just thought this contrivance was particularly damaging as it makes these otherwise smart characters look slightly incompetent.
Thanks for your exhaustive and detailed reply!
Ok, maybe a controversial opinion, but I don't understand how Badeni's tattoo plan was in any way clever or practical.
Functionally, how is it any different from simply making a paper copy of Oczy's diary and hiding it in a safe place, then leaving behind directions to find it? If he trusted Grabowski enough to lead him to the beggars (making the assumption that he wouldn't report the blasphemous tattoos to the church), then I'd say he could equally well have left the entirety of Oczy's diary with him directly.
Worse, tattooing the pages on 60 different people causes a bunch of unique problems that a paper copy doesn't have.
Firstly, life expectancy wasn't exactly fantastic in those times, especially for a beggar. By the time Grabowski discovered them, half the pages could be missing from them dying — or hell, just moving to a different slum. I'd say it's very lucky that all of the people Badeni tattooed both survived and stuck together long enough for the plan to work.
Secondly, that's at least 60 people who have witnessed/experienced Badeni tattooing something weird on their heads. They may not know how to read, but they should have at least some idea of what writing is. So, again, it's an immense stroke of luck that none of them, at any point, got curious or suspicious enough to go to a clergyman and ask "hey, what the hell did this guy write on my head"?
And remember, that's 60 people we're talking about. Whatever chance one of them has to accidentally or deliberately reveal the plan — multiply it by 60. Plus, if even one of them was discovered, catching all the others would have likely been fairly easy for the church.
So... what exactly was the point of the whole plan? If you think about it, it's an immense amount of work for seemingly no reward. I'm genuinely curious what Badeni thought the advantage was in doing things this way.
[2025-01-15 EDIT:]
On further reflection, the only two possible reasons I can think of are:
Badeni was hoping that his sheer audaciousness would create an emotional effect on whoever finds the writing. The plan was proof of his devotion to the cause, and a plea for the next person not to squander all this effort. Though I seriously doubt this would be enough to sway anyone devout to the church, so it's a bit of a stretch.
The 60 tattooed beggars were essentially hostages. Badeni was expecting that if the church found them, they would be accused of heresy and executed. So he put 60 human lives on the shoulders of whoever finds the writing. Reporting the tattoos would mean condemning 60 people to death, which I bet even devout believers would hesitate to do.
But these are just guesses based on imperfect information. If the beggars explained how they were unwittingly roped into the plan, maybe they wouldn't be executed. So it's unclear if they'd even work as hostages.
#Thank you for the great response!#orb: on the movements of the earth#chi: chikyuu no undou ni tsuite
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Red Eyes and Evil Time, practically the same thing right (Patreon)
#Doodles#Villainsona#Just Desserts#Sona double feature!#Red Eyes and Evil Time /are/ different for the record lol#There's overlap and they're both eye details but they're different#Mmm Red Eyes feels so niiiice <3 And I've been pacing myself so it's Just Red Eyes!#No red shines :) Which can happen even on Red Eyes#In fact it's probably more common - the red shines on Blue Eyes was something of an oddity#No one knows the lore except me I'll explain someday lol#For now it's just fun to be in Red Eyes! :D And the occasional Evil Time as well lol - all the overlaps!#I somehow accidentally made a like?? Cotton Candied Popcorn themed outfit for Eli for the first one lol that wasn't my intention#I mean it's cute I'm not about to fight it lol I'd love for my sonas to have other clothes inspired by each other haha#Eli's eyes are still quite fun to draw as well haha those bright pops of colour - Red Purple or Blue they're all so stark and shaped#Back to their classic feminine outfit good for them uwu#Silly lad#They're also still a scientist first and foremost - it's all chemicals there's gotta be a way to recreate it externally!#Local vampire scientist creates mood stabilizers more at 7 lol#I'm quite pleased with the three-red two-purple one-blue gradient as well hehe - the decay! :D I like it as a visual#Charm tiiime <3 <3 Happy Charm time in Evil Time! Usually better than bad mood Evil Time lol - at least for those around her#Still chaotic to be in it haha - but happy chaos is happy! Lol#Again more fun with eyes the light bounce in the one where she's holding the melt is so cute and looks so nice on my paper too <3#I had a silly comic idea for her for the next time I get into Red Eyes as well - if I remember lol#Big Love is hearts! It just makes sense#Also I am Really proud of the cleaning job I did on that last one lol - from original to this? Night and day ngl#Guess that goes to show how little cleaning I do on-page lol#For some I do! Others...#Still thinking up outfits - you can probably just make out ''Hero Charm'' in her hair lol trying to think around different themes#Something that could become something else! Add or subtract an element and it changes the ''meaning'' of the outfit#Kinda like her initial caped design that Kaiein rejected hmmm
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Yesterday I've been doing some proper physical exercise for the first time since last year and I'm just imagining how proud my f/os would be of me🥹
#it was just a 20 minute beginners home workout and I can feel every muscle in my body now but I think they'd be so happy I pushed through!#I've had particularly Heinz and Maximilian on my mind I think they would be sooo happy that I'm trying to take better care of myself💖#Heinz because he's always there anyway of course but I kind of imagine Max is probably overall the fittest out of my f/os#he seems like the kind of guy who'd want to be an example for his soldiers and always hold himself to the same standards as them#he'd be so supportive and cheer me on and be proud of me every time I get myself to do something😭💖💖#I've never particularly enjoyed doing sports (aside horse riding but in the past year I didn't have time anymore for that bc of uni😭😭)#so I didn't really do anything anymore after I finished school#I started doing simple home workouts last year but in winter my mental health went a little📉 and then I had no motivation to keep going#dunno how long I'll go through with it this time but better than nothing I guess#again with the home workouts lmao bc driving to the nearest gym ain't worth the time for me and I'd need some basic fitness first anyway#I'm doing it mainly for health reasons but this time I'm also motivated to actually get a bit stronger#I don't mind looking like a stick figure and I'm overall content with my body (maybe it could help me to look a bit more masc tho?👀👀)#but I know especially for my posture and such it would be good if my muscles were just a tad bit more developed#my mum was proud of me too when I told her about it hehe :) she works in healthcare she's always a little concerned#she's just a little worried about me getting health issues when I'm older that could be avoided by taking proper care of my body now#I get where she's coming from but it's not easy but at least I'm motivated to try again now :)#selnia talks
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I fucking hate being traumatized because why am I bawling the hardest I've bawled in god-knows-how-long because someone I didn't even like that much berated Me. gasping wailing trembling and snotting over this for several minutes.
#personal#sanism#abuse mention#child abuse mention#I'm still not entirely done crying really. I'm just trying to stop and calm Myself. not doing well at the moment#because someone on the discord server mentioned trump's inauguration and I basically said 'I don't like trump either#but it's still important to keep pushing for change. who's in office doesn't change that' and he just. immediately escalated the situation#accused Me of not caring about oppression. I explained Myself further but he told Me to go fuck Myself and capped it off with#'you already admitted to being a fucking narcissist so why would i want to be around you' (exact quote BTW)#and I just can't stop sobbing. I don't know if I've cried this much since I was 13. I keep having to pause My typing because I start crying#I didn't hate him but I wasn't attached to him either. it's just that I have so much fucking trauma along these lines#so many instances of My mom putting words in My mouth. getting short-tempered with Me over benign remarks that I didn't understand#because I'm autistic. dismissing My opinions. making Me hide My feelings and issues from her#because she's made it clear that she doesn't trust people like Me#it's made Me have so much trouble handling even friendly social interaction. I've only just learned how to do that#I just can't handle having that same mistreatment forced onto Me by anyone else. especially with so little warning or build-up#and what makes Me break down even worse is the fact that I know I'll have to deal with him again#he wasn't even punished while this was happening. despite the server owner and other mod being online. the owner just said 'stressful day'#and the other mod started talking with a regular user about how it was uncalled for once he had already left the conversation#nobody even checked in on Me. even though I stayed online for a good half-an-hour afterwards. I only just logged off a few minutes ago#because the notifications from unrelated conversations started overstimulating Me#regardless. I don't even want to see him again. I don't want to be in the same server as him I don't want to talk to him I don't want to#but it's not a real formal server. it's a 'friend group.' and they've shown before that they prioritize keeping the peace#over actually punishing hostility. just a week or so ago I told them I wasn't comfortable with them using the R-slur#and someone freaked out over My complaint being 'politically correct' and left. he was brought back just a few days later. and before that#he had already derailed a previous discussion I tried to have about the word by sending gifs featuring it and redirecting the conversation#that sucked but at least it wasn't outright triggering. but I just can't stand the thought of having to be around someone#who treated Me so much like how My abuser has. that's the most I've ever had to relive My trauma because of someone else#that's the most anyone has ever mirrored it to Me. I just can't stand it but I know I'll have to be around him#I don't even know if he's gonna apologize. he's made it clear how little he thinks of Me as a human being. PLUS
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yes it's just me whining about the same thing for the billionth time, pls just scroll past nothing new to see here 👋
#i just want to enjoy the summer but i feel like i don't deserve to if i'm not constantly trying to become employed again 😭#''apply for jobs then? problem solved'' uh-huh yes but!! i also hate applying for jobs#job seeking can be so incredibly humiliating#first i have to send them a letter BEGGING to be invited to an interview#and then i have to try and convince them that i am actually competent and good at my job even though you have my cv right there#and then afterwards they call me to tell me they found someone who they liked better than me#(or rather someone who was more competent than me judging by their work history etc.)#it's like ''yes we are hiring but not YOU specifically lol''#like. at school if you take a test you get the grade you deserve based on how you did in the exam.#it's something you can actually directly affect yourself#but if someone who's applying for the same job with me has more work experience or whatever they will get hired over me no matter what i do#(at least that's how it usually works on my field)#in which case it doesn't matter if i do well in the interview or nah. bc the other person was always going to be picked for the job anyway#and yes one could say i can then be satisfied if i did my best but it's little consolation when i'm still unemployed!!#and so every time i apply for a job and get rejected it feels like a personal failure#and to avoid that feeling of failure i want to avoid applying for jobs altogether#so yeah. being active in job seeking is more likely to relieve me from this misery but job seeking is ALSO misery. so 🤷♀️#that on top of the fact i don't even _want_ to apply for all the open positions on my field#but i feel obliged to because it's what i have a degree on. and when i'm unemployed i don't have the luxury to choose which ones i apply fo#i can't afford to be picky#I DON'T DREAM OF LABOUR I JUST NEED MONEY TO LIVE BUT I ALSO DON'T WANT TO DO JUST ANY JOB! I AM NOT STRONG ENOUGH FOR THAT!#i don't want to come home crying from work every day because i hate every single aspect of my life INCLUDING my job 😭#when this semester i actually HAD a job i didn't mind waking up to every morning 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#it's not fair it's not fair it's not fair#to conclude i don't deserve to enjoy myself in the summer because i'm not doing enough to fix my unemployement situation#(just like i don't deserve to feel sad about being lonely because i don't work hard enough to maintain deep friendships#but that's a crisis for another day! stay tuned ✌️)
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this would be torturous if it weren't so funny :)
#translation: i am focusing on the funny part because if i dont it WILL feel torturous#it is like one of them 1930s comedies where a girl who's doing her best (me) is doing her best to NOT run into boy#because you know you DO have to take measures to guard your heart when things are going off the rails. (i'm not happy about this but i know#it's good for me to at least not seek out every opportunity to see him.)#but who KEEPS running into boy because she keeps trying to not do it#today was the third or fourth time this week i think. Lord help meeeee#i had a >:O moment last sunday when i was congratulating myself on avoiding a 'coincidental' meeting i usually seek out#and was opening the door to leave and bam he was on the other side. i could've wept with hysterical laughter.#the waiting room chapter
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