#& still nobody double-check me lol

[lupine-trees]

humility

[ for @microficmay day 14. drarry | rating: t | word count: 254 | part 12 | part 1 here | read the full story here ♡⋆˙ ]

— — —

After a morning of broom maintenance and more testing on his (as-yet-in-progress) training wheels charm, Harry finds Draco in the tertiary lab. It’s small and unadorned and the one McGonagall set aside for Draco to complete his Owl-post potions mastery program.

Draco sits at his scattered desk, flipping through envelopes and scribbling into his notebook. The work table is a stark contrast, organized carefully, neat as a pin. A small pewter cauldron bubbles over the low simmer of a charmed hearth stone.

“Wolfsbane?” Harry murmurs, finally catching Draco’s attention.

His gaze snaps up, a smile flicking over his face before falling away.

“The mod I’ve been working on. I’m trying to imbue some of the elements of a Pepper-Up, so the characteristic crash isn’t quite so abrupt, but the bicorn horn and the occamy egg powder are counteractive— I mean, obviously. I thought I could use dried occamy as a substitute, but it doesn’t perform as efficiently alongside the necessary dosage of Sopophorous beans.”

He taps his fingers across the desktop, thoughtful.

“I’m wondering if I could supplement the dried occamy with porcupine quills, but there have been limited studies on their interactions, and nothing that’s gone to the clinical stages, and I don’t really have time to start from scratch, at least not right now, but I thought— what?” Draco falters.

“Nothing,” Harry says, lopsided grin unchecked.

Draco frowns.

“You’re remarkable,” Harry huffs, approaching his desk.

The tips of Draco’s ears go pink.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” he says.

“Don’t be modest,” Harry answers.

[daman19942]

TSR CC Recommendations: TS2 Lot Builders

Nobody asked for this but I have a little time on my hands and I said I might do it, so here is a list of some TSR lot builders who I recommend checking out. A few notes under the cut before we get started (all details under the cut, as well, in case you aren't interested in my preamble):

This is not meant to be paid promotion for TSR. I believe TSR asking users to pay for their CC is ridiculous, especially for a 19 year old game they haven't supported in 7 years. But I spent many years uploading there during the peak-TS2 / pre-TS3 era and know there is great CC in their archives that newer players may not know about. And unlike TheSims2.com, which has sadly shuffled off this mortal coil, TSR's content is still available to freely download (assuming you can stomach the pop-ups and wait times)

This post will only be about lot builders because that was what I was primarily uploading and downloading in this era. I was friendly with some of the creators I am about to list, but none of them are still active members of the TS2 community.

The preview pics might be a little rough and the architecture styles will likely feel very dated compared to the most popular styles these days, which are more colorful, cluttered, and use 3t2 and 4t2 conversions. Re: the previews: too many of us were using free trials of PaintShopPro back then, and TSR limited us to 2 previews, so we did our best. Re: the styles: unlike pre-2010's CAS CC, which was full of hand painted and "realistic" textures (LOL), these are the same objects you can find in the game today, just being used in different ways! Sometimes for the first time! And, yes, while some of these creators used CC, it was mostly Homecrafter walls and floors, as you'll see below.

This was also the hey-day of CFE lot building, which has certainly fallen out of favor to more traditional builds (in part because graphics cards have improved and these types of builds don't look as good in 2024, and also because the great CFE experimenters, builders, and tutorial writers are no longer part of the community and their original discoveries are gone as well - I am happy to go down a massive rabbit hole on this piece of TS2 history if anyone else cares, but trust me, you don't have to care).

Alright that is enough caveating, here are some recs! (Links are in the creator's names and they take you to their Lots, though many of them have other creations, too).

Lord Tiko Speaking of great CFE builders! Lord Tiko built spaceships, boats, pagodas, domes, windmills and bridges, oh so many bridges before retiring mid-TS2 because of health issues. He was one of the first builders to take Daihtnaoz7's single and double bridge tutorials and apply them to really big lots. I'm still not sure how he built the Venice Rialto Bridge, or his other European water lots. Overall, a massive inspiration to me when I was prioritizing CFE builds.

Hatshepsut My favorite "traditional" home builder, and someone I considered a friend. She specialized in English and American builds, and I had many of Hat's houses in my old saves and was impressed by her range and decorating style which was (for the time) more varied than many of her peers. Knew how to take great preview pics of her houses, too.

Tigerblue Another builder I corresponded with, Tigerblue was probably the least prolific uploader on this list for sheer number of uploads, but she also crossed a range of styles. Her builds leaned way into specific styles (see the previews, these were all part of consistent sets of 3,4, or even 10 lots), but this was also what happened when a new EP dropped and everyone raced to uploaded builds using as many of the new objects and styles as possible. Tigerblue just happened to be better at it than most of us.

Cyclonesue Do current TS2 players know Cyclonesue? Because it's hard to think of someone who had a bigger impact on building and decorating of the era, first with her English and Tudor builds and later with her extremely distinct grunge creations. Seriously, check out her Urban Renewal series and the corresponding objects. Iconic stuff that surely now feels frozen in time. I probably only played 20% of her lots that I downloaded, but they still make for great hood decor. Like Tiko, someone who happily experimented with CFE.

Illiana The creator who inspired me to make this list is, ironically, the one on it who I know the least about (she is a Featured Artist but not in the Hall of Fame, whatever that means). I just started playing her Tri-Annyas fraternity house and have a few other lots floating around my game. She built in a range of styles, from classical to modern to Twikki Island to grunge. Revisiting some of them in-game, the TSR previews do not do them justice.

*EXHALES* If you made it to this point, kudos to you. I'm sure there are creators I've forgotten, and houses I haven't linked to, but this is a good starting point for digging into some of the eclectic builds the TSR(chives) have to offer (I just coined that, is it clever? It is not). Maybe I'll do a Part 2 if people like this.

If you have any favorites of your own, let me know what I missed! And as I do with my old Exchange re-uploads, I am tagging @sims2packrat and @oldasscustomcontent for general TS2 history awareness!

[sgiandubh]

The door faces North

This has been, by far, one of the most complex investigations I have ever done in this fandom, and I am truly sorry for the long wait I had to inflict on many of you & for the uncharacteristic radio silence in DMs and comments. During this peculiar journey, I checked, double-checked and cross-checked as many details as I could and I carefully considered at least two different theories, of which I still think they do not exclude each other. I am now confident enough to make not only an educated guess, but also a daring bet on SRH's next whisky move.

Also, sorry for the length of this post. Truly sorry - think of the completely pulverized night sleep I had to give up, in order to bring this to you.

But first, a word on Marple's obvious PR tip on the Hopetoun Estate refurbishment and distillery old/new project. I am fair game enough to tell you the obvious: her overall recounting of the principals is roughly correct, spare perhaps one or two minor details. Correct, but dry - she limits herself to the technical documentation submitted by Golden Decanters and The Hopetoun Estates Trust to the West Lothian Council for approval. She correctly points out that S is not a visible part of the deal, at this point in time and she does a decent summing up of a very, very, VERY plethoric amount of bureaucratic information. She concludes, and I think she is partially right, that he might be interested in becoming an investor (I am taking things a bit further, though). But in doing so, she focuses on the development phase of the project only: the possible connections with SRH and his own spirits business are less, if at all, obvious.

I am going to give you my view of all this charade and, if I am going to mention (and probably repeat) some things already found by her, I am going to focus on the people: this is where the whole story starts to become remarkably interesting, at least to me. After all, I remember promising you some more clarity. Here's an honest, fair play take.

Little did I know, when I started to write about that (now defunct) company, Midhope Castle Distillery, Ltd (https://www.tumblr.com/sgiandubh/748597198794670080/the-info-provided-above-is-correct-but-outdated?source=share), that my investigation would turn to this:

... for it was to be just an almost random layer of a juggernaut matryoshka of defunct or still active companies, featuring roughly the same people and no less than 6 different name combinations centered around Midhope, Hopetoun, etc.

The following pics will give you an idea - feel free to open them in a separate tab, for clarity . I preferred this synthetic approach, because otherwise you will curse the shite out of me. But it had to be done, with or without Depon, Advil's Greek cousin (and before you ask a graphologist, this is my handwriting, and nobody else's 🙃):

The only explanation for the whole almost frantic Midhope/Hopetoun crisscross/hopscotch (LOL) combos I can think of is two people trying to secure one (several?) credit lines or to attract significant investors for their project and ultimately failing to do so. But I might be wrong (although I doubt that, thank you). Out of this entire maze ( I swear I now have a migraine), there are only two active companies remaining: Golden Decanters Ltd (renamed GD Spirits Ltd, in April 2022) and Midhope Ltd (renamed Skosk Ltd, in July 2023). It is on them I am going to focus my gaze.

GD Spirits Ltd was incorporated in Berwick-upon-Tweed, England (just across the Scottish border), probably for tax reasons, on March 11, 2015, the nature of its business being listed as 'wholesale of wine, beer, spirits, etc.'. It started with a team of two women: Julia Mackenzie-Gillanders and Ann Medlock, whose names we are going to see over and over again in all the eight corporate avatars. Later down the timeline (LOL for three decades and a half), on January 30, 2018, they were briefly (until July 19, 2018) joined by two very interesting professionals: Mrs. Margaret Boswell, an attorney at the very prestigious international law firm Gide Loyrette Nouel (Paris and London offices)...

...and Ken Robertson, former Corporate Affairs Director at Diageo Whisky, a subsidiary of the international Diageo group, one of the major players on the world spirits' market:

The second company, Skosk Ltd, was incorporated in August 2021, in Perth, Scotland, its nature of business being listed as 'distilling, rectifying and blending of spirits', with the clear intention to align with the exacting criteria prescribed by the 2009 Scotch Whisky Regulations:

[ Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scotch_whisky - sorry, I don't have time to wax lyrical on this, and neither do you]

This time, we only meet again the two distillerettes, Gillanders and Medwick. Up until now, at least, nobody else (attorney, former sales executive, whisky expert) has joined the platoon - TBC? I would not speculate and leave all options open.

There is little to 0 transparency on Skosk's financial situation, at the moment and to be honest, it looks very much like S's co-star (hehe)'s Irish business venture...

... but I was a bit more lucky, and the numbers more chatty, as far as GD Spirits was concerned:

Paging all shipper chartered accountants out there, but to me, it doesn't look great, at the moment. Cash is ridiculous, the net worth is hemorrhaging and the current assets are negligible, compared to 2020, when I think they managed to secure one or two credit lines, but not nearly enough for what they needed. Just enough to pay themselves and their external consultants and cover the operating costs, if you ask me.

The revised Planning Statement, of 8 February 2024, posted first by Marple, echoes my initial guess (COVID blew it up, see link to the first post) and the above assessment:

Mark this: 'Discussions are now proceeding with investors and there is a realistic prospect that work will begin in the near future (2024/2025) to implement the permission.' Given that they will start with the road and parking rehabilitation and upgrading, probably overlapping with the distillery building, it would make sense to begin this autumn at the earliest, with the most urgent: access to the site itself.

The initial Planning Statement, dated 9 July 2020 and re-posted on March 21st, 2024, tells a more detailed story. This is part and parcel of the current project as well, since the revision is just pointing out the changes operated, not the entire rest, which remains unchanged. You be the judge:

Also keep in mind this tiny, tiny thing: the Business Plan is 'submitted (...) under Private and Confidential Cover'. See where I am looking?

The initial plan was (and still is) for GD Spirits to produce their own booze, using Midhope's own barley (this is very important for the rest of my theory!). They even offer an overview of the real impact of their project on the local economy:

20 to 38 initial new job creations for a £ 15 to 30 million investment is not 'huge', madam Marple. Cumbernauld is huge. This? This is rather modest, if you ask me. But hey, what do I know about the labor market, right?

That initial Statement tells also the story they want to tell about the genesis of their idea, the scouting for the right location and a couple of other interesting details:

So they are telling us they started to look for the perfect location in 2018 and oh, hello, they found the Hopetoun Estate rather quickly, already starting the pre-planning application consultations as early as July 2019 (don't get me started, please):

If so, then why did they incorporate not one, but two different companies clearly linking them to the Estate (Hopetoun Estate Distillery Ltd and Hopetoun Estate Whiskies Ltd) the same day and as early as May 23rd 2017 (and both dissolved in December 2022), as my above penciled timeline (LOOOOOL) shows? Who is really behind this project and why this entire ballet? It's like me pre-emptively looking for rental properties in (let's randomly guess) Lisbon, when it's just wishful thinking, heavily projecting and with 0 guarantees I will be posted there, right? I mean, I adore and deeply know Lisbon and I would be thrilled to go there. But I am not currently looking for any rental property, just like that, because that would be a #silly, rookie mistake. In their case, I think there's a different situation - again, you be the judge.

A first answer, as to who is really behind that project, was given by the UK media, back in 2020:

How odd, when we know that both Mrs. Boswell, the well-traveled attorney and Mr. Robertson resigned from GD Spirits in July 2018. Do they still say hi to the two distillerettes? Do they quietly keep an eye on the project? Are they silent partners? Business angels? Shareholders? Time to remind you that under UK law, there is 0 visibility on the shareholder's structure of a company. You just see the officers (Director, Secretary, etc), on the Company House website. On an umpteenth, last- second cross-check, it became apparent that Mr. Robertson remained involved in another company of the distillerettes, Hopetoun Estate Whiskies Ltd (yes, the one mentioned above), until its voluntary strike-off, in December 2022.

Their best laid plans do mention OL, and how could it be otherwise? But all this £ 15 to 30 million hullaballoo for 20.000 people only (who counted them and how?), on a seasonal basis?

High-end restaurant, luxury B&B, event spaces, you name it. Interesting, to say the least.

And, for the people in the back, who still think SRH has a 100 years lease at Midhope (Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ, the stupidity!):

This is why he commented as a 'member of the public'. At face value, there is no public involvement into that project. Yet. But it is my belief there is a vested interest in all this, justifying the comment, the visit, those papers rolled in his fist, etc. At first, I thought that was a visit to Lallybroch by the Exec Producer of OL's Season 8, to discuss technicalities - and shared that privately with a wonderful friend only. I mean, why not and still perfectly possible. But then, as I could not sleep tonight and felt guilty to have you all waiting, I started to connect some tiny dots.

Like this one, for a start:

Yes, I know, Marple told you that FIRST, I would not dare say otherwise, because if I did there would be a transcontinental screech. That trademark application was filed at the US Patent and Trade Office in September 2023 and I thought (and still partially do) it was a potential rebranding solution to The Sassenach's EUIPO nightmare (much exaggerated by the fandom's toothbrush experts):

But you also know I am an idiot and I always check people's CVs, when I follow a thread. This morning, the one Distillerette I am particularly interested in is Mrs. Julia Hall-Mackenzie-Gillanders (née Scales) and not like *urv would be.

Her LinkedIn profile is exceptionally talkative, too:

... and a BA (with Honors) in Fashion Design, class of 2005, at the Northumbria University.

The Financial Times article 'From packing boxes to wine deals worth millions', you can read on her LinkedIn page, tells a very interesting story. It is the story of a shy underdog (lots of temple bells clinging, at the moment), who made it by sheer persistence. It starts like this:

'When a painfully shy young woman contacted a fine wine merchant and said ' I have no qualifications- can I help?', she got the job and today is signing deals worth millions of pounds.'

It obviously did ring a bell and if SRH knows she exists (she is married, *urv!), and I dare to speculate he does, it must have struck a deep chord. Would I do business with her? I wouldn't speculate, although I am not very sure. Would he? He'd probably listen very carefully to what she has to pitch, for a start.

And what she has to pitch is also very interesting, in his world. A brief look at the Golden Decanters' website shows a first high-end single malt sourced collection of 4 exceptional expressions already sold out:

And when they mean high-end, they mean gold leaf labelling and all the tralala:

And, some last minute news, too:

Remind me, because I am an old woman, after this white night: wasn't The Sassenach (no comment, we agree to disagree and I am very skeptical), a blend?

We have these dots, then:

Bold Underdog ->spirits business->high-end collection of single malts sold out->business partnership with owners of Midhope Castle, fictional Lallybroch in OL, including a distillery and whisky production with Midhope/Lallybroch barley -> visit by the male lead and spirits entrepreneur (also the fictional Lallybroch laird) to Midhope/Lallybroch and vested interest in the estate's most recent business project....

What if The Sassenach would be included, for a start, in that new Blended Collection? And could it really be fanfic to imagine a future high-end, limited edition, Lallybroch whisky produced at Midhope, with Midhope/Lallybroch barley? It wouldn't be the first time, would it: after all, they did it with that limited tequila batch.

As I said, because I am (remember Someone? LOL) a 'silly cow', I was hoping he wouldn't do it. But my guess is he might very well do exactly that, with those people and under that label.

It's half past eight AM, local time and I need a strong, black coffee.

I rest my case (and I am bracing myself for the screeching). I will answer Anons later, after I come back from the hairdresser's. Appointments must be kept at all costs. Thank you all for your patience.

[greeniegaes]

Svsss Au! God Shen Jiu and Body Double Shen Yuan

Basically Shen Jiu is a very hard worker for CQS behind everyone’s eyes, he doesn’t care about recognition because he doesn’t want to be apart of a sect with a bad reputation and shit, but he does such a good job that he just… ascends to Heaven early. Some gods in heaven have been watching him for a long time and have been like “bruh he does so much stuff and they don’t even do anything for him??? He’s too good for them >:(“ and just make him join all of them in heaven

And Shen Jiu is like kinda fine with it he guesses. He doesn’t want to jsut leave the sect though, he still has his own responsibilities and stuff. So one of the other gods brings him a soul he found (Shen Yuan) and is like “we can make him a body like yours and he can be your mouthpiece at the sect and nobody will be none the wiser” and Shen Jiu agrees

So he makes Shen Yuan a (almost perfect replica) body and is like, here is my peak, take care of it, I’ll descend from heaven every once in awhile to check up on things.

And so he lives his days out as a god while Shen Yuan is a peak lord. SJ quickly realizes how much of a nerd this guy is, whenever he is by himself he’s gushing about weapons and monsters, a weird kid but whatever he gets the job done. What SJ is annoyed over me how nobody seems to realize he swapped himself out, people he’s known for years, once since childhood, don’t realize this person isn’t him.

And he’s a bit jealous. Of the person meant to be him.

The other gods realize this and are like “how about you and the CQS peak lords of old all descend so you can see them” (both because they feel bad and because SJ is scary when he is pissed off, guqin strings snapping is a terrifying sound) and he agrees, but still hasn’t told the sect about the fact he ascended and Shen Yuan.

So Shen Yuan hears about all the peak lords of old coming, is excited to meet SJ’s master, but once he gets to the grand hall he sees SJ there, all of the sect leaders happily around him. And he feels like he doesn’t belong suddenly. All those years he was here aren’t really his, they are supposed to be Shen Jiu’s, so SY goes back to the bamboo hut to just sit there by himself, waiting. because that’s what he should do now that SJ is back home.

SJ is talking to the other peak lords and is kinda just bored of it after awhile and is like “alright where is SQQ?” And everyone is like “you’re SQQ?” And he’s like “shitttttt I still haven’t told them” so he goes to his peak to find Shen Yuan only to find him in the bamboo house sobbing while holding a massive amount of his weapons.

“Shen Jiuuuuuu… I can’t hold them all :(“ SJ is confused, his face doesn’t look right crying like that and SY sounds pathetic “why do you need to hold your swords Shen Yuan” “aren’t you going to be a peak lord again? I need to continue my work elsewhere” SJ is just like huh- tf is wrong with this dude “you’re still peak lord, stop crying with my face it looks weird and let’s get going.” (Shen Yuan wasn’t even crying about leaving the peak, he was upset about leaving his research or weapons behind LMAO awful priorities)

So he gets both of them back to the sect hall and is like “see? This is the peak lord” and everyone is like “oh you are identical” and Shen Jiu is just exasperated with all of them and starts talking about details that nobody would notice in a million years for how the two of them were different.

Also doodles because I was talking to a friend about this lol

[hotmessmaxpress]

in your onlyfans!au do you think vale and marc do some only fans content together? trying to make sure that that nobody can recognize vale of course. i was thinking some of these pov videos (like vale holding the camera while marc's giving him head only showing marc's face and his own dick).

Here, have Rosquez OnlyFans AU, part 10 🤍

I don't think they'd ever post anything, because Vale already fucked up once in terms of keeping his identity secret (lol clown). I also think that Marc sort of slows down the onlyfans content (and eventually stops) soon after he and Vale meet irl.

However they do film a lot. They take a lot of videos. If they wanted to sell their sex tapes, they'd make a fortune and they'd have enough to basically start their own streaming service.

When Marc moves in with Vale, he brings some of his filming equipment.

"Is this all of it?" Vale asks, looking incredulously and the massive pile of cameras, lights, and microphones. There are a few black zippered cases that he assumes must hold various sex toys.

Marc shakes his head.

"About half," he says, ignoring the stunned look on Vale's face. "I left some back home so I don't have to take it with me when I go back and forth."

They're still ironing out their schedule-- Marc refuses to fully move out of the house he shares with Alex, so he's splitting himself between Vale's and Alex's. He plans to stay with Alex when Vale is racing and traveling, and stay with Vale when he's home.

Vale reaches for one of the cameras with a raised eyebrow. Marc grins and takes the camera from Vale. He grabs a long black leather case containing a tripod and hands it to Vale. He also picks up a ring light and one of the microphones that matches the camera Vale selected. 

He gestures for Vale to follow him, and he sets off toward the bedroom. 

Vale follows obediently, and Marc focuses on the feeling of his heart picking up and his cock taking interest. Filming for onlyfans has never been a chore to him; he genuinely enjoys every time, but in the weeks between Vale ghosting him and then meeting him, it was just a little bit less fun. There was an element of loss every time he posted a video knowing it wouldn’t be seen by Vale.

Now, though, he’s focused on filming for an entirely different reason. He won’t even consider posting it, but there’s nothing preventing him from making Vale his own little collection to use while he’s travelling. 

He sets the ring light up first, then sets the camera on the bed and takes the tripod from Vale. He’s pleased to see the front of Vale’s pants tight across his bulge, and he can’t help his satisfied grin as he turns to set up the tripod. 

It doesn’t take him long to set things up in a way that he’s happy with; he’s done this so many times in much more difficult settings than a bed. 

When he finishes, he turns to find Vale gripping his cock through his pants. The older man looks painfully horny, and Marc is proud of him for waiting so patiently. 

He rewards him with a deep kiss, pressing himself against Vale’s front. Vale groans into the kiss, letting go of himself in favor of wrapping his hands around Marc’s waist. 

Marc loses himself in the feeling of kissing Valentino for a moment. Vale is the perfect height to make Marc stretch up, and the taste of his mouth makes him want to drop to his knees. 

“What are you doing with your camera, hm?” Vale asks, when he finally drags his mouth away from Marc’s. 

“You’re going to fuck me,” Marc instructs happily, taking on the role of director. “On the bed. We’re going to record it and you can watch it before your next race.”

Vale groans against Marc’s neck. 

“Okay?” Marc asks, before he turns the camera on. Vale nods, and Marc turns the camera on and hits record. He double checks that it’s recording, then guides Vale onto the bed. Vale lets him take charge, and Marc kisses Vale slowly before stripping them both of their shirts. He plants himself in Vale’s lap, rocking his hips sensually against Vale’s. Vale grips his hips tightly, and Marc can’t help but grin at how riled up the older man is. 

“You like this, don’t you?” Marc purrs in his ear. “Knowing that we’re being watched.”

Vale’s eyes flicker to the camera, and Marc grabs his chin to turn his face back to his. 

“Don’t look at it, look at me.”

He rocks his hips in Vale’s lap again, pressing a kiss to his neck, before he scoots back and strips himself of the rest of his clothes. He pumps his cock a few times just to see the way Vale’s neck convulses as he swallows thickly. 

Then he tugs at Vale’s trousers, pulling them off to fully undress his partner. Vale lets his head fall back, and Marc takes the opportunity to lean down and suck and Vale’s balls. 

Vale lets out a strangled noise, and Marc fights a smile as he wraps a hand around the older man’s cock and lavishes attention on his balls. 

Marc isn’t prepped, and for a minute he admonishes himself for the amateur mistake of starting a recording with no prep and without the supplies close by. He reminds himself gently that this isn’t to publish, though, this is for Valentino. 

He presses a kiss to the head of Valentino’s cock, but otherwise doesn’t put his mouth on it. He sees the hungry look in Vale’s eyes, and he can’t stop smiling. His grin is clearly infectious, because he sees a hint of a smile on Vale’s face. 

Marc shuffles over to the nightstand, rifling around for the lube. He considers doing it himself, quick and dirty, but ultimately this is just for enjoyment. It doesn’t have to be perfect. 

Vale makes the decision for him, sitting up to kiss him and slip the bottle of lube from his fingers. He manhandles Marc into the center of the bed, and rolls him onto his back with a pillow beneath his hips. It’s a small but sweet gesture just to give Marc a little extra comfort as Vale sets to work stretching his hole. Marc tugs Vale a little off to the side, hoping that the camera will catch the slide of Vale’s fingers inside him. 

He moans as Vale’s long fingers finally press against his prostate, and Vale takes that for the encouragement it is. It doesn’t take long to stretch him, but Vale punishes his prostate a bit longer until Marc is squirming against the sheets. 

“Vale, please,” Marc pleads. “I need you.”

Vale sucks a possessive mark on the column of his throat, then presses the head of his cock inside Marc. 

Marc groans at the intrusion, fingers never quite comparing to the feeling of a thick cock moving inside. He rocks his hips up, and Vale presses in until he’s flush against Marc’s body. 

“Please,” Marc begs again, and Vale sits up to begin pounding into Marc. It’s a blur from there; Marc forgets about the camera as his thoughts become consumed by Vale and the feeling of his cock moving inside him. All he feels is Vale, above, around, inside him. 

He knows he’s making noise, and he can feel Vale huffing and grunting. Marc pulls Vale down for a sloppy, open mouthed kiss. He keeps his mouth open, pleading with his eyes for Vale to sense what he wants. Vale, ever on the same wavelength, grins before spitting forcefully into Marc’s mouth. Marc whines, tasting Vale on his tongue, and feels his balls tighten. 

“Vale, I’m–” 

Vale bites Marc’s lip then slips a hand between them to pump Marc’s neglected cock. It only takes a few jerks before Marc is arching off the bed, crying out as he cums. He cums up to his chin, vision whiting out for a moment. He’s vaguely aware of Vale grunting and his hips stuttering as he fills Marc with his own cum. 

They linger like that for a few long moments, Vale still inside of him, before Vale collapses next to him. Marc is quickly disgusted by the feeling of cum coating his body, and he knows he’ll have to shower, but he focuses on breathing for a bit. 

“I love you,” he says sweetly. 

Vale leans up on an elbow to kiss him gently. “I love you too.”

Marc eventually gets up to turn the camera off before it fills his storage, and then they take some time to shower together, wasting entirely too much water. Marc idly hopes they’ll have to shower again later, because he knows round two will come when they rewatch what they just filmed.

[maryhadalittlehobby]

Recap of my experiences at the IWTV Premiere April 30, 2024

I found out about if from one of the most unlikiest sources. A person I thought was an even bigger fandom lurker than myself😅 I wasn't even gonna ask but I said fuck it, maybe they know someone who knows someone. And they did but said people were under ndas. Initially said they couldn't say but then last minute said they believe they knew where it was going to be.

I didn't say anything because 1) I didn't want them or their friend to get in trouble by spreading the info. 2) possibly spread misinfomation if that wasn't the place and 3) nobody asked lol

I thought I would just show up and see what I could see. In the past I have done this at a Walking Dead premiere. At that event it turned out that they had a lobby full of props that anyone could enter and take pics of. They even had walkers roaming around. Then the kicker-I got into that TWD premiere TICKETLESS by pure accident! So why not fuck around and find out again.

I put on a "closet cosplay" of Claudia in the upcoming yellow dress using all stuff I already owned and headed out.

I walked up to Mckittrick hotel, asked if there was a standby or waiting list but the person said they didnt know. There was a lot of important looking people surrounded with guards double checking lists and whatnot so I gave up that angle and loitered around with the other 15 or so fans who found the location too hoping to just see a glimpse of our favs.

Didn't have to wait to long as one by one they started showing up. The first one I noticed was Delainey and she slayed in that black sheer number. She was soft-spoken and a little shy but took her time and signed/took pictures with all the people who were there. Not sure if she knew I was cosplaying Claudia but she did compliment my contacts.

I had all my pics on motion video so if I didnt like the actual pic there was a few frames of vid to pick from as well. The actual video is a bonus! Too bad I can only link 1 video here but a lot of vids are on my IG in the highlight. Same name!

Then Sam came. As soon as he exited the car the wind blew his hair back and I lost my train of thought. He is pretty and his eyes are a lighter shade of blue than they look in pics. Also he is blonder! And so slim! The suit they had him in was a fun nod to vintage suits.

He too complimented my contacts! In the vid he is asking me questions about them but as soon as I take the pic another fan was yelling his name and grabbed his attentionl. Not mad lol I probably would have gotten less coherent the more I talked😅

Jacob showed up soon after-all smiles. What a cutey. He was damn near falling in the garbage they had us lowly non invites next to trying to contort this way and that to sign and take pics. Again-so small! And he too complimented my contacts😁 if the suit would have been properly tailored( the pants looked to long!) It would have been slay

Not gonna lie I kinda blacked out after meeting Sam so my memory with jacob is fuzzy.

Assad and Luke arrived together shortly after but got whisked away pretty quickly so I didn't get a pic with them. Eric was the very first to arrive and despite me being there I missed him too.

But I was sooo happy getting the unholy family little else mattered. I contemplated waiting after but I was BUZZING with adrenaline and starving lol. My fandom plug said she did come after and met EVERYONE and their momma. Cast and crew alike and they were still happy to engage even after their long night❤️

Finally Fang Gangers, please do not repost/ reupload/ or screenshot anything of mine as your content. Linking back / sharing is ok.

🖤🧛🏾‍♀️

[medlarmeadows]

I Still Love You (Do You?)

prince!Charlie Slimecicle x lady-in-waiting!reader

Synopsis: You succumb to your injuries after an attack at the palace. Charlie is there by your bedside when you wake up.

Warning(s): mentions of explosions, stabbings, and injuries, emotional angst, unrequited-ish love

Word Count: 1.3k

A/N: This fic expands on the other prince!Charlie fic, but can be read alone! This takes place a few days after the first fic, but still within the week-long festival the royal family was hosting. Sorry that I used the same screenshot lol, couldn't be bothered to take a new one and this man does not have enough non-goofy sad pictures for me to use (please send if you have any plsplspls). Enjoy!

masterlist

You wake up with a groan. Your mouth and throat were dry, and there was a dull throbbing in your side. When you open your eyes, you’re grateful to see that the room was softly lit by the late afternoon sunlight streaming in through the windows.

Furrowing your brow, you try to remember the events of the night before:

Small explosions rocked the palace grounds. Dirt was spit up from the ground and festival decorations were torn or set on fire.

Hooded figures were attacking festival goers, both royal and common. Blood was spilled, chaos enveloped the scene as people frantically tried to flee.

You were rushing both Princess Amelia and Prince Charlie to a safe room. Along the way, a hooded figure rammed into your body at an awkward angle. The attack sends you stumbling, but the attacker was quickly subdued by the guards who were with you.

You made it to the safe room with other members of royalty and nobility. Jumping into your duties, you check on Amelia to make sure she was uninjured before helping the other servants present treat other injuries.

When somebody accidentally elbowed your side, white light blinded your vision from the sheer pain that shot through your body. You doubled over before falling and passing out.

“You’re awake, thank gods,” a voice to your right jolts you out of your memories.

You turn to see Charlie, his brown hair still messy from the chaos of the night before, his lavender dress shirt and black suit pants dirtied and slightly torn. He was sitting on what looked like the most uncomfortable chair in the palace, and seemed as though he hadn’t slept at all.

Yet, he looked as handsome as he always was.

You suck in a breath.

“Are you injured?” you ask him before he can get another word in.

Charlie chokes out am almost-laugh, surprised by your question.

“Am I injured? What – I’m not the one in an infirmary bed,” he responds incredulously.

“Where’s Mels? Is she okay?” you continue, worry for your princess causing you to ignore his remark as you push yourself with your arms to sit up.

The dull throb turns into a sharp pain, and you curse as you pause in your movements, breathing heavily through the pain.

“What happened?”

Charlie sighs, before standing up from his chair to lean over and help you scoot up into a more propped up position. You go stiff as he approaches.

Sighing again, he says, “Let me help you.”

He meets your gaze.

“Please?”

You take a beat to still your heart, still apprehensive and very very guilty, and relax, giving him a nod.

As he props you up (and you pretend not to notice how the warmth from his arms seep into your bones even through your clothes), he explains what had happened:

“Do you remember the hooded person that rammed into you as we were running? He was trying to go for either Amelia or me, but you were in the way. I guess he had a knife that cut into your side, but you didn’t feel it because of adrenaline and the chaos of everything around us.”

He runs a hair through his already messy hair and all but collapses back into his chair.

“Gods, Y/N, you could’ve died if nobody noticed your injury. You had lost so much blood by the time you collapsed – I don’t know how you were still up and tending to other people with that hole in your side.”

Charlie pauses, and you see the hand that was resting next to yours twitch. He retreats his hand and leans back in his chair.

“Do you know how devastated I – Amelia would be if you died?” he choked out, not meeting your gaze.

Silence fills the room as Charlie hangs his head, refusing to look up at you. You frown at him, taking in his tired state.

It didn’t make sense why he had probably sat by your bedside for the whole night. It didn’t make sense why he was so worried.

“Why do you care?” you ask, your hands coming to your stomach to fidget and pick. “I broke up with you. I ignored you for two years as you tried to piece our friendship back together. All I’ve ever done these past two years is push you and Mels together for the sake of a union neither of you want. Why do you care if I live or die?”

Charlie raises his head and catches you picking at your cuticles. Instinctively, he reaches for them, pulling them apart gently and cradling your hands in his. His sincere gaze falls on you, and despite yourself, you can’t seem to look away.

“You might have broken up with me. You might have thrown away two years of happiness together for the kingdom. But I know you, and I know you didn’t do any of that out of hate.”

“Charlie – ” You start to protest and pull away, but his hands tighten around yours just barely, a silent plea to let him finish. And you do.

“I know that you’re stupidly selfless and loyal,” he continues, a thumb soothing over the back of your hand like he’s trying to write his truths into your skin until they become yours. “And you would place the happiness of other over yours. But I’m selfish. So, despite the past two years of avoiding me, despite all that you did to drive me away – ”

He takes a shaky breath, closing his eyes like he’s gathering strength, before he looks at you again.

“I still love you.”

Your lips part as you stare at your worst nightmare happening in front of you in real time.

“Charlie – ” your voice breaks a little.

“Look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t still love me,” he pleads with you, leaning closer. “Tell me you don’t still love me, and I’ll leave.”

You stare at a man who looks starved in all ways but physical. A royal prince begging a lady-in-waiting for a chance to live again.

“Your parents would never allow it,” you try to reason. “Duty would never allow – ”

“And if it wasn’t for duty?” he cuts you off. “If I wasn’t a prince and you weren’t a lady-in-waiting? Ignoring everything around us, do you still love me?”

You swallow hard.

“I can’t.”

“You can’t, or you don’t?” Charlie presses. “Please don’t lie to me again.”

You can feel his hands shaking as they grasp yours. Or maybe, yours were too at the sheer weight of his plea.

A stone sits at the base of your stomach. Guilt pushes the stone up your throat to choke you for what you are about to do.

Staring straight into Charlie’s eyes, you say:

“I don’t love you anymore. I’m sorry, Charlie.”

The way Charlie’s expression crumples makes you want to take back your words and apologise over and over again. But the weight of the king and queen’s threat still pressed down on your shoulders:

You will face the consequences of your actions should you fail to bring Prince Charlie and Princess Amelia together.

He retracts his hands from yours, and you immediately feel colder. Even the sunlight streaming in had disappeared as the sun slowly set beyond your line of vision. Shakily, he stands.

“I really hope that was the truth,” he whispers, looking at you with glassy eyes. “I really hope that you’re happy.”

And he leaves. Leaves you with ice in your bones that you froze with your own words. Leaves you with an emptiness in your soul that you hollowed with your own hands.

Leaves you with a broken heart that you smashed on your own accord.

[cebwrites]

babygirl trifecta

i love them all so god damn much <333 extra notes and rambles under the cut for kakashi and law highlighting some differences as well as my journey with them!

well i tried to keep it brief but this ended up getting cluttered pretty quickly lmao, i can only hope it's legible for anyone who takes the time out of their day to read this

i already mentioned it but it really is funny how my little martini glass meow looks so much broader than kakashi (it's not even that much of an actual difference, i overlayed them to check!) it just looks like that because kakashi looks evenly proportioned but law has their cunty little whore waist TT0TT

in the five years that i've been completely absent naruto fandom circles i've gotten over my wild aversion to facial hair lol, what a weird hill to die on?? i'm still not the biggest fan of huge beards, but you put a mild stubble on a tired little guy?? i'll go bonkers bro, straight COCONUTS-- i draw law with a little extra scruff to their goatee and it's just sdfjskghdkfh!!! 💓💖💗💞 my baby's so masculine oh my gawwww <3333

i suspect it's aizawa who started it all and one piece just doubled down my slightly piqued interest (everyone was just so smooth in naruto and when they did have facial hair it was full beards and no inbetween, that's potentially what turned me off it initially lmao)

wrt law's pronouns i feel unhinged every time i have to talk about it but like skhdskgb i almost exclusively refer to them with they/them pronouns verbally (this counts maybe?? whenever i'm not writing anyway) but sometimes in headcanons or fics the "he" and "him"s just sort of slip out and they feel natural but not when i'm talking about them casually

by and large i'd much rather people use they/them for law when interacting with me but idk i feel compelled to "pick one" and it's one of those silly things that really shouldn't bother me but does sdkhfskgh

i doodled the old oc i used to have paired with kakashi (they still do live together somewhere in the back of my mind!) alongside law's little kirin chibi but they technically do have an OP version and that's vastly different from who they used to be in the narutoverse nobody's particularly interested in that but me but i still think it's a neat little tidbit :3

i could've easily done this interaction with iruka or shisui - since they were very much comfort characters too, hell, shisui even ended up as an OC (reiji!) cause i loved him that much - but ultimately i ended up picking my og naruto king 💕

okay that's enough rambling for one day, i didn't touch that much on aizawa because this is long enough as is sdjfskghkdg back to my little corner i skitter--

[destinyc1020]

back in 2019, Tom besides Z was with Jacob, he was still talking about her in those comic cons He attended. They were broken up but not bad blood and We had Claire’s comments about Tom in December of that year, she definitely preferred Tom over JE but she respected her daughter’s decision. It was obvious the New York photos were something Tom wasn’t expecting, I don’t think the Darnell unfollowed and followed was by mistake. That moment was probably when Tom decided to move on. Nadia was still dating her ex by February 14th, they broke up afterwards and by march she moved in with Tom, for supposedly a few weeks of lockdown that nobody predicted will be months.

Tom posting Nadia: I was happy for him, He can have a public relationship like Z, but afterwards I felt He posted her because she was jealous of Z and insecure, and he did it to make her feel important. When Nadia finished filming and didn’t go back to Berlin, then went on vacation with a friend and then to London, showed It was over. All his family went to Berlin to say goodbye to Tom, she didn’t. It was kind of messy but She had all the signs, he was still with Z in his heart. Better this way than a cheating situation

My opinion, don’t come after Destiny

back in 2019, Tom besides Z was with Jacob, he was still talking about her in those comic cons He attended. They were broken up but not bad blood and We had Claire’s comments about Tom in December of that year, she definitely preferred Tom over JE but she respected her daughter’s decision. It was obvious the New York photos were something Tom wasn’t expecting, I don’t think the Darnell unfollowed and followed was by mistake. That moment was probably when Tom decided to move on. Nadia was still dating her ex by February 14th, they broke up afterwards and by march she moved in with Tom, for supposedly a few weeks of lockdown that nobody predicted will be months.

Yup!! I can tell the ones in my inbox who were actually there during that time like I was, and saw everything go down in real time lol.

Tom posting Nadia: I was happy for him, He can have a public relationship like Z, but afterwards I felt He posted her because she was jealous of Z and insecure, and he did it to make her feel important. When Nadia finished filming and didn’t go back to Berlin, then went on vacation with a friend and then to London, showed It was over. All his family went to Berlin to say goodbye to Tom, she didn’t. It was kind of messy but She had all the signs, he was still with Z in his heart.

^^THISSS!!! In fact, if you all go back to my blog and look at the posts I made when Tom made his rlshp "Instagram Official" lol, I was actually HAPPY for him and glad that he was able to finally have a relationship in the public eye and not have to be hiding a gf all the time like he was in the Tomdaya rlshp (which, I understand WHY they did it, but was NOT sustainable long-term imo at ALL).

I was actually happy for him!!! And I honestly didn't mind N. Until, she started shading him and Zendaya... 😒

Another thing to keep in mind... Fans keep clinging on to this, "Oh he posted her TWICE on Instagram" thing. Omg twice?? WHAT?? Alert the papers! He posted her *gasp* twice on his IG! 🤣

I totally agree w/your assessment ...it was my same line of thought... I think that he posted her the first time genuinely... But the second time?? I strongly suspect that was done in order to make her feel less insecure. Cuz remember, he and Z had obviously reconnected by then cuz of her Emmy nod back in July. What fans FORGET is that Tom posted her on like Aug 6th (was it?) and then by August 15th, Nadia's mom had already UNfollowed Tom. I forget the actual dates now (I'd have to go back on my blog to double-check lol), but let's just say, it was obvious that Tom and Nadia split up..... like DAYS after he posted her the second time. LOL. The second time doesn't even really count to me. Let's get real lol.... 😅😅 He was not in love with her!

Better this way than a cheating situation

[lackablazeical]

Addams! AU Snippet 6: 'Freakshow'

FULL CREDIT TO WRITER NewFallenLeaves ON A03!!!!!! SHE MAKES KILLER ANGST AND FLUFF ALIKE, CHECK OUT ALL HER WORKS!!!! NOW!!!!! IF YOU LOVE OR CARE ABOUT ANYTHING, DO IT. NOW. BEFORE I GET U /J

As usual, art to add on! It was a 1 layer challenge I gave up on partway thru, mostly just cus I wanted to be done with it, lol! Greyscale is always so fun, tho!

Full snippet below the cut! ⬇️⬇️⬇️

---

“Hold still, you little scumsucker.” As the burly human patted Mikey down, he came up quickly with two small daggers tucked into Mikey’s belt, as well as the ones hidden in the holster at the small of his back. “Shit, kid, how many more knives have you got, huh? Cough ‘em up.”

“Well,” said Mikey, “There’s the whole family with Mr. Stabby, and Miss Gashy, and the Puncture Brothers, and Auntie Slicer, and–”

The pile of small blades was already over half-a-dozen strong, and the man still managed to find three more.

“Oh, no!” Mikey wailed as the last one hit the table. He twisted against the tight ropes that bound his wrists behind his back, “You’re going to take all of them?”

“We know who sent you, we’re not taking any chances.” Finally satisfied, the man hauled Mikey none-too-gently by the elbow and dragged him out of the covered wooden cart that served as the freak show’s ‘office.’

The small encampment was reminiscent of a traveling gypsy convoy, with colorfully painted covered wagons. Some were cages for “FEARSOME GRUESOME MUST-SEE MUTANTS” with bold-lettered signs and warnings to stay back. Others were smaller, with striped awnings and shelves of cheap merchandise or galleries of rigged carnival games, with “STEP RIGHT UP AND TAKE A CHANCE” invitations for any fool willing to throw away hard-earned coin.

The heavy-set human dragged Mikey toward one of the larger cage carts. “Gonna put you someplace where you’re too worried about stayin’ alive to think about running off or causin’ trouble.”

He stopped in front of the enclosure. It looked as sparse and uncomfortable as any of the other terrible accommodations in the traveling freakshow. Unadorned iron bars, no straw or hay strewn for the mutant held within. The guard shoved Mikey through and slammed the cell door behind him.

Mikey tumbled onto the grated metal floor, lying prone while he waited for the man’s footsteps to fade. As soon as everything was silent, he flipped upright. From the corner of the cage came a low, throaty growling, and the occupant of the cell rose to his feet.

Even hunched, the alligator mutant was massive. Four times Mikey’s size. Larger than Raph, even, and little else save teeth and muscle.

“Don’t be…alarmed.” Every word the alligator spoke was slow and deliberate. “I…won’t harm you.”

“I know!” said Mikey. “I made Donnie do research on everything before I came.”

“You…know?”

“Woulda been pretty stupid for me to run in here without knowing everything about this lame-o sideshow. Besides, getting details is easy. It was supposed to add to Mama’s Spectacle Spectacular, after all. She bought it. And it woulda been such a cool thing, too! Everybody loves her circus, she has all the nicest hotel rooms for her performers, and you get to eat at the buffet, and the bar is open all night, and–”

“You…don’t seem…concerned,” said the alligator. “Were you…not poached…like the rest of us?”

“Ha! Nobody could poach me if they tried. Know how much Donnie has to add to his tranq formula to knock me out? Betcha don’t, because it’s a lot. I have resistance.” With a quick roll of his hips and shoulders, Mikey twisted his bound hands from behind his back and hopped over them like a backward jump rope. “Boy, am I glad they put me in here, you’re my first choice, anyway.”

“For…what?”

“For helping, of course! These humans turned out to be a bunch of dirty, no-good, double-crosser, deal-breaker cheaters, and they took Mama’s money and tried to cut and run. So now Mama wants me to burn the whole thing to the ground! Isn’t that great?! Anyway, are you good with pulverizing all the stuff? Because Raph didn’t wanna come, he was busy watching the Mrs. Cuddles’ Puppets-in-Peril Halloween Specials marathon. So if you could go ahead and do all the smashing, that would be awesome.”

“…smashing?”

Instead of replying, Mikey stuck out his tongue as he reached for a spot on the back of his neck, just below the rim of his shell. He withdrew a short, narrow length of sharpened metal, and proceeded to cut through the ropes.

“You managed…to sneak in a weapon,” the alligator marveled.

“Pffft,” said Mikey. “He only took my knives. This is my shiv.”

With his hands free, Mikey took a moment to stretch like a dancer before a routine. Then he promptly flopped down into a sitting position, legs crisscrossed. He set the shiv down on the floor of the cage and began pulling random assorted items out from non-existent pockets in his clothing and lining them up. “I still got lots of good stuff, see? This is my bolo, and this is my garrote, and this is my ice pick, and this is my can opener, and this is my bookend, and this is my cherry pitter, and this is my…”

The alligator watched as Mikey continued unabated. He blinked slowly at each new addition to the stockpile, his face becoming more and more skeptical as the items became less and less…perilous. When Mikey placed a penny down, he finally spoke.

“What…exactly…do you intend to accomplish…with a coin?”

“Ooooo, goody, I’m glad you noticed, I like this one.” Mikey flipped the penny with his thumb and caught it between his fingers. When he held it up to the light, the sharpened edge all around its circumference gleamed. “We’ll use it first!”

He tugged loose a lacing from the knee of his pants and looped it around the penny. Then he stood, approached the bars of the cage, took a deep breath…and began shrieking.

“HELP HELP MISTER JAILER GUY, I’M SCARED I DON’T WANNA GET EATEN BY AN ALLIGATOR!” Mikey twisted and rammed his shell against the bars to make even more noise. The camp echoed with resounding, repeated clang-clang-clang. “LEMME OUT LEMME OUT LEMME OUT OH PLEASE OH PLEASE!”

Several of the freakshow guards were on ‘patrol,’ roaming the perimeter of the camp. One who was nearby didn’t exactly come running, but he did seem annoyed and stepped quickly in the direction of the cage. “Shut up, kid. The more you screech the faster that freaking monster’s gonna chomp on you, just to get the goddamn noise to sto–”

The guard’s yells pitched up into a howl as a razor-edged penny, launched like a slingshot, lodged in his eye.

“What’s wrong?! What’s wrong?!” a fellow guard hurried up to assist him.

Mikey grinned as he picked up another weapon from his cache, aimed it between the bars, and punched a button.

Two metal barbs pierced the second man’s chest and an electrical current lit up his entire frame with sparks. He collapsed to the ground, convulsing.

“That’s my taser,” Mikey said. He reached through the bars and fished a keyring out of the guard’s pocket and quickly released the lock. He jumped onto the cage door and rode it as it swung open, dropping the taser in the dirt beside the unfortunate human, current still running.

“Come on, mister—ah–” Mikey craned his neck to look at the advertisement emblazoned across the top of the cage, “--Lethal Leatherhead! Smashy-smash, while I torch everything!”

Tentatively, Leatherhead stepped out of his enclosure. “You wish…to burn everything? With what…?”

But Mikey had already withdrawn a liquid-filled bottle from some hidden pocket in his coat. He drew a long, silken scarf from his glove by sleight of hand, flicked it to catch the flame on the tail of his mask, and then stuffed the burning wick into the neck of the bottle. “Molotov cocktail!”

He flung the bottle through the window of the largest wagon. The resulting explosion blew out the remaining glass, and Mikey dashed forward to intercept as guards raced to escape the inferno.

“What the hell is going o–”

“Machete!”

The man who had unluckily blundered closest to him gurgled, the handle blooming from his throat.

“Clothespins!”

Another guard screeched and flailed as two small wooden clips were driven into his eyes.

“Lanyard!”

Strangled gagging.

“Teacup!”

Wailing.

Leatherhead watched from the open door of his enclosure as Mikey continued his spree, shrieking the name of every item he produced and laughing maniacally as he dashed from one victim to the next.

A rhinoceros mutant in the cage next to his leaned towards the bars. “Friend of yours?”

“If it will convince him…to not jam a small kitchen tool down my throat…” Leatherhead ripped apart the hinges on the rhino mutant’s cage, “...then I will readily be his friend.”

The screech of “Rice paddle!” and a subsequent choking sound echoed across the grounds. Both mutants cringed.

“...rice paddle. Sure.” The rhino tagged along after Leatherhead as he moved to next cage. As that door bashed open, a warthog mutant jumped free and clasped hands with the rhino. They jostled briefly before turning to flee into the night. “Good luck with your crazy friend.”

“Bottlecap!” Mikey cackled from somewhere across the camp. “Stapler!”

Wet, squelching thumps and more screams.

A gangly mutant with mantis-like arms lounged near the door of his enclosure, watching Leatherhead expectantly. “That kiddo yous got over there has the right idea, I say,” he drawled.

Leatherhead nodded. “Fist,” he said. And punched the cage.

[butch-blu-scout]

hi!!! if your requests are still open could you write something with scout x reader 🤞 maybe some angst if you're up for it??? (im a sucker for angst) thank u !! 🐌

Hi! Of course they're still open! This is actually the first ask I've gotten in a while lol. Feel free to send in more if you have other ideas ^-^

I've never been very good at angst but here's my best shot. It's very dramatic. My other idea for this was infidelity but I thought that might be too sad (however if anyone wants to see that feel free to send a request).

Thank you to @schlong69420 for helping me brainstorm.

Warnings for: insecurity, angst and feels (to the best of my abilities)

Word Count: 760

Scout often wondered about how people really felt about him. I mean, really felt. Sure, some of his teammates called him annoying, or treated him like a little brother- but he knew that was all in good faith. At least they'd tell him to screw off to his face if he got too annoying.

But it was harder to figure things out when it came to folks outside the team, and by "folks" I mean his partner, and by "his partner" I mean you.

Scout had been particularly energetic today, way more than usual. He had been chatty to everyone, including you. He was all over the field, hardly able to concentrate of the objective. He ran to every explosion, every shout, anything that he heard immediately grabbing his attention. It was frustrating for everyone on the team, even Scout was getting annoyed with his own inability to focus.

It was safe to say that they lost the match.

After the match everyone had glared at him whenever he tried to lighten the mood. Usually it worked, but today not so much. But he kept trying.

"Hey ya know- those guys were prolly cheatin' anyway. So really-" Scout was cut off.

"Son- will you just can it?" Engie snapped, "We lost. Everyone knows it's your fault. Everyone else has accepted it, you need to do the same before you get a black eye."

That shut him up real quick.

That was Scout. He tried all the time to be there for everyone else, to lighten the mood, to make everyone feel a bit better. Even if he was the butt of the joke. It was just who he was. But today... he just felt like he was too much. For anyone. Even you.

You hadn't seen Scout since he'd left the showers. Usually after he hit the showers, you both headed straight to his room to hang out, watch movies, whatever. But when you knocked on the door he wasn't there. You'd even double checked to make sure he wasn't just asleep, but he wasn't there. Which was odd for him.

You went searching, checking the kitchen, and the lounge area, The garage, even the Med-Bay, but he wasn't there. Nobody seemed to know where he went either, that or they were still too pissy to want to find him.

You were almost to Sniper's camper when you finally spotted him. You had turned around to check for critters when you saw the glint of something on the roof of the base. Dogtags. It didn't take much walking to see the small dash of bright red curled up on the roof.

Climbing up the roof was quick work if you knew where the secret ladder was (it was in Sniper's room, which he never used). It wasn't hard to sneak up behind Scout either. He was too lost in his thoughts (usually a bad thing when it came to Scout).

"Hey baby," You sat down next to him. He jumped at your sudden intrusion, he calmed fairly quickly though. Scout was still wrestling with his pent up energy, made obvious by the tapping of his leg and his other little fidgets.

"Hey sweetheart, ya scared me. What uh, what bring ya up here?" He asked.

"Oh, well I was looking for you." You explained, "You disappeared after the match today. I though we were gonna watch a movie tonight?"

"Ah, yeah. Sorry I um.. Just needed to clear my head. Didn't wanna keep botherin' anybody."

"Scout."

"What?"

" What's going on with you hm? You're not usually like this."

"It's- I just- It's nothin' really," He scratched the back of his neck, "I'm just being a lot today, and I know it. And I can't even help myself 'cause I don't realize it until it's too late. And then everyone's pissed off at me. And I already pissed everybody off by losin' the damn match, and I really didn't feel like pissin' you off too. 'Cause I knew you wouldn't tell me if I got too annoyin'- 'cause I know you. And I'm probably pissin- you off right now with alla this and I should just stop fuckin' talkin' but I can't and I-"

You wrapped your arms around him gently.

The two of you sat up there for a while, watching the stars. You let Scout talk about everything and nothing, just to get it out of his system. Because, yeah, he could be annoying, and he could be a lot, but that didn't make you love him any less.

______________________________________________________________

I hope this was good, or at least filled some of your itch for angst ^-^. Sorry that it's kinda short. But I hope you enjoy it nonetheless. Thanks for sending a request :)

[lauratheghost]

My trip to Montreal

& the Sleep Token show

(long post below)

The Trip:

I went with my sister, who did the driving. The drive there was awesome. We left at 5:30 a.m. and there was no traffic at all. The border took five minutes. We laughed at the "warning Canada ahead" sign (that was like five feet in front of the border 😂)

It was like an hour of driving through massive farms before we reached the city? Idk why but I didn't expect the farms.

Driving in Montreal was another story. It was terrifying 😭 I have car anxiety in general but it was so stressful. It made traffic in Boston not seem so bad. The way the lanes were marked was confusing to us, and some of the signs were also confusing. We hit a speed bump going crazy fast because we had no idea what the sign meant and the actual bump on the ground wasn't yellow (now it seems obvious though, ok 🤷🏼‍♀️😂) and the buses drive crazy fast and one cut us off and almost hit us.

Our phones didn't work as soon as we crossed the border. We tried to add a global package to our plans but it still didn't work. This was only a major problem because we needed GPS. If we missed a turn we would have to find a Harvey's or Starbucks or something to get their wifi and reroute. It took us a long time to get to Laval 😂

Once we got to the hotel we parked the car and didn't use it again until we left. But we took taxis and that was cool! I don't think I've ever taken a taxi before and the drivers were really nice.

We loved our hotel and we could see Place Bell from our window. The area was so nice, and very clean for a city. It feels like Laval is an up-and-coming city because of all the construction we saw, and our hotel was also new apparently.

Everything was so cheap? The lattes I bought were like $6 CAD so $4.40 USD. In my hometown, lattes are double that. All the food and snacks were such a good deal. I stopped obsessively checking my bank account after a while because everything seemed so inexpensive 😂 (Also, I'm a cheap person so this is saying something lol)

It was more of a culture shock than I expected. I knew it was going to be a lot of French but I guess I didn't grasp the reality of that until I was there. Thank God I took french in high school. I could not really hold a conversation, but I could read some signs and menus and kind've get the jist of what people were saying to me.

Everyone was so kind and helpful. We asked a lot of strangers questions and they were all very nice. I only had two small experiences with rude people (and I laughed about it)

Crosswalks were also a bit scary lol. It was weird that some cars still go when the crosswalk button goes off. In my area, all directions of traffic stop while people cross.

My hotel was 50 % people with Sleep Token shirts and 50 % hockey players 😂

We LOVE Tim Hortons 😍 Their iced mocha latte was amazing. I wish I had one in my town now.

Three days went by so fast! It felt like one day.

We went to Mount Royal Park, the Cosmodome, the Biosphere, and La Rhonde. I rode the ferris wheel even though I'm scared of heights. I think my heart stopped for a second but the view was beautiful. 😂🥰

Some random things we noticed- nobody really wears jeans or Crocs 🤷🏼‍♀️😂 everyone dresses a bit nicer. And we didn't see any cops besides event security the entire time we were there, which is unheard of in Massachusetts, I see cops drive by twenty times a day everyday probably. There were lilacs everywhere which I loved. So many people biked- it made me want to be more healthy and active. Public transport seemed very available and I'm jealous of that because public transport where I am is trash.

Can you drink in public? Idk, but we saw a guy drinking a twisted tea while casually crossing the road lol.

The Show:

People were lined up starting around 7 pm the night before 👀

At 5:30 a.m. there was maybe ten or fifteen people camped out with tents and everything. I applaud their dedication, but I could never 😭

I kept an eye on the line and once the merch stand opened I went over and bought a shirt beforehand. I got a t-shirt with the tour dates on it 🖤

The line system seemed really unorganized. Nobody knew what line went where. Besides that, getting inside was easy and I liked the venue.

Our seats had a good view, but we were so high up it made me a bit anxious. It was a little hard to see III because of the fog/lights, and Espera was kind've blocked by a light fixture, but I had a great view of IV and II which made me really happy 🥰

ESB's opening set: So, they are not exactly my cup of tea BUT I don't think they deserve the hate they've been getting. My only problem was that the singers scream sounded the same over and over. I wasn't sure if he was saying the same phrase or not, but it made every song sound the same. They did have some good moments though! There was a moment where he screamed lower/more gutteral and I liked that more. There was also a moment where the guitar and instruments sounded really cool but I can't explain it. I was glad to see they had a little mosh pit going too.

Sleep Token was amazing as expected. I'm forever in awe of how good Vessel sounds live. I was so happy I could see II good too, I loved watching his little dances and hand gestures. I saw III do his little swimming motion and he did get a pit! A pretty big one too from what I saw. I didn't expect them to hand out drumsticks and stuff so early, because they didn't play TMBTE or Euclid yet- but they were just doing that fake-out encore thing I guess. 😂

I love the diversity of the fans at their shows- all types of people and all ages and it's so nice to see 🖤 The guy sitting beside me did not look like someone I would expect to listen to Sleep Token, but he was singing every word and recording all the same parts of their songs as me 😂

After the show I got to meet @shatterthefragments !!! It was so great, and they made awesome ST keychains- I will treasure mine forever 🖤

I still haven't really processed any of this yet because after the show I was constantly busy- between packing up and doing the few last things we wanted to do in the city, and then driving five hours back home. There's videos and pictures from this weekend that I haven't even looked at yet. I will definitely post some videos or photos here soon though

Overall, I give this trip a 9/10

I'm so glad I impulsively bought tickets and got my passport renewed. It was so fun and it makes me wanna travel more in the future. 🖤

[maybeimamuppet]

picking teams- chapter 14: cady

hello everyone!! boo surprise sunday post!! because!! TODAY IS MY THIRD WRITING BIRTHDAY WOOOOOO!

today three years ago i posted my first ever oneshot (i think technically it was on the 4 bc it was late at night but the intention was to be today so i’m sticking with the 3). i can honestly say i was expecting NOBODY to read anything of mine and that this would be something i did for maybe a few months and then dropped like all my other hobbies.

and here we are three years later! so i’d just like to say a huge thank you to everyone who’s supported me through this little journey over the last three years. i feel like i really have a community and a little family here. i appreciate every single pair of eyeballs that has ever laid eyes on a fic of mine, whether you comment and i get to know who you are or you’re just a lurker. whether you’re new or you’ve been here the whole time. thank you from the bottom of my heart for being here for and with me <3

anyhoo! mushy stuff over for now lol please enjoy this chapter :)

tw for

broken bones

and as always if i missed something please let me know so i can add it in!

——————

Cady goes back to school that Wednesday.

Her parents let her have one more day off to recover and finish the homework she had been putting off. Cady's still not feeling 100% after her episode, as Janis put it, but she can't afford to miss any more school. Or cheer practice. She's gotten more than a few threatening texts from Regina.

She runs into Janis briefly going into homeroom, since it's in the same classroom as Janis' first period. She smiles, mostly at the ground, and Janis surreptitiously brushes her hand against Cady's and gently links their fingers together before walking off like nothing happened.

Cady blushes furiously and heads to her seat. She hunches in on herself to scribble something on a piece of notebook paper she rips off and folds up. She's so focused on making sure nobody sees what she's writing that she almost misses Ms. Norbury trying to take attendance.

"Cady. Caaaady. Heron. Hello."

"Wh- oh, uh, here," she stutters. Ms. Norbury arches an eyebrow and ticks her off on her computer. Cady trills her lips and tucks the paper into her pocket.

"Glad to have you back, Cady," she says once the bell rings.

"Thanks! Uh, see you this afternoon!" Cady says, rushing out the door. They already don't have much time to get from class to class, and she has a stop to make this time.

She tries to act like she's just leaning casually against the wall and she doesn't have to be across the building in two minutes. Once she looks around to double check nobody is watching, she carefully slips the note between the slats in Janis' locker and rushes off to her class.

Hopefully she gets it.

—-

Cady looks up from her phone in fright when she hears a murmured, "Hey, sweet thing."

Janis is peeking around the corner of the bleachers, lunch in hand and a confused look on her face. Cady spotted this during a rainy-day indoor practice last week. The bleachers are completely solid, so nobody can see in. "Did anyone follow you? See you?"

"Nobody important," Janis shrugs as she puts her food down. "Whatcha doing?"

Cady sighs in relief upon hearing confirmation that nobody will see them together. She leans in for a kiss and gets a sweet little peck. "I want to have lunch with you! It's like our own little place!"

"That it is," Janis agrees with a chuckle. "How's your day been?"

"Good! I got a hundred on my math test," Cady says happily.

"Of course you did," Janis laughs. "What'd you tell Regina?"

"About what?"

"Where you are," Janis says as she takes a bite of her... probably turkey sandwich. Cady's eyes widen. Shit.

"I... didn't tell her anything," she says quietly.

Janis quirks an eyebrow. "Better come up with something quick."

"Why?"

"She's gonna grill you like a war interrogator," Janis snorts.

Shit. She's right. "Uh... um..."

"Just tell her you skipped lunch," Janis shrugs.

"Skipped it?" Cady asks.

Janis shrugs again. "I dunno. That'd probably work."

"I'll think of something," Cady hums, pursing her lips and taking an exasperated bite out of her celery stick. Janis smiles at her like she's some cute little animal.

"So... any particular reason you're slipping notes into my locker and sneaking around with me behind the bleachers?" Janis says with a smirk as she scoots a little closer to Cady.

Cady groans as she's suddenly reminded why she had done this. "I have to go to Regina's after school. We're having a costume fitting for the holiday parade."

Janis looks at her oddly. "You're in the parade?"

Cady nods eagerly. "Mmhmm! I get to be an acro elf!"

"A what?" Janis giggles.

"I get to dress as an elf and do tumbling and acrobatic stuff next to Santa's float!"

"Oh," Janis says. "Stevie loves that one. I didn't know it was us."

"They choose the best cheer team in the region to do it. Apparently this is the first time in, like, ten years that it's been North Shore," Cady explains.

Janis snorts. "That makes more sense."

"I'm really excited. But I have to spend a lot of time with the Plastics, I won't have as much time free after school," Cady says apologetically.

Janis shrugs. "It's just a parade. Once it's done your schedule will calm down a bit and we can spend more time together again. Not like we're breaking up."

Cady giggles. "I still have my knight in shining armor to come save me from the Plastics if I beckon her."

"Damn right you do," Janis smirks, leaning in for a kiss.

Cady happily leans in too, smiling to herself as their lips touch. She's suddenly very glad she totally ate it at their last practice and spied this hideout behind the bleachers from the ground.

"Might need to save you already," Janis hums as they pull apart, looking Cady up and down with a small grimace.

Cady sheepishly looks down at her bright pink crop top she'd decided to wear today. She tugs at her collar, suddenly self-conscious. "You don't like it?"

"No, no, you look cute," Janis says. Something in her tone tells Cady it's a half-truth at best. Oh well.

“Thanks," she says. Janis takes another bite of her sandwich and sprawls on the hard floor of the gym with her head on Cady's lap.

"Oh, get this- my math class this morning," she says. Cady tunes out almost immediately, stroking some stray hairs away from Janis' forehead and just watching her mouth move. It's probably nothing important. God, she's gorgeous.

What is she going to tell Regina?

I got sick- ew, no.

I had to talk to a teacher- too easy to mess up if she comes from the wrong direction. They'd get suspicious too easily.

I- oh, fuck it, I'll think of something.

She continues munching on her lunch and half-listening to Janis speak. Janis doesn't seem to notice or care one way or the other. Cady smiles and pulls out her phone to check her messages. She thinks of something then.

"And then-"

"Have you... told anyone about us?"

Janis pauses mid-sentence. "No."

"Not even Damian?" Cady asks shyly.

Janis shakes her head. "I kinda still don't believe it myself. I wanted to keep it to myself for a while."

"You don't wanna tell people?" Cady asks with a frown.

"No! No, I do. Some people," Janis says. "I just wanted it to stay between us for a little bit. And I figured I should check with you before I told anyone. But I'd be fine telling a few people now."

"Oh," Cady says.

"Do you want to?" Janis asks, sitting up and brushing her hair out of her face. Cady thinks for a moment before she nods.

"We should probably tell Damian, at least. He'll find out sooner or later anyway."

Janis sighs. "True."

"You don't want to?"

"No, I'm just preparing myself," Janis says, looking at Cady out of the corner of her eye with a small grin. "Might as well get it over with, I guess. C'mere."

Cady frowns in confusion and scoots closer. Janis pulls out her phone, opens the camera, and leans in. Cady catches on and gently rests a hand on Janis' cheek, smiling into a sweet kiss. She can feel Janis smiling too as she hears the camera shutter snap and they break apart. Janis sneaks a quick peck to Cady's nose, making her blink in shock and giggle quietly.

Janis opens her text conversation with Damian and types out a message. Cady hugs her arm and leans in over her shoulder to read it.

snarkisian: hey babe

cupboard: whaaaaaat do you want

snarkisian: Sent a photo: things have developed

Janis' phone starts ringing almost immediately. Janis frowns at it as Damian's contact photo fills the screen and it buzzes in her hand, but she hits the green button and the speaker so they can both hear.

As soon as she does, a piercing shriek rings out from the speakers. It's loud enough that Cady practically feels her brain dislodge and start rattling around in her head. She thinks she might've heard him all the way from the cafeteria, too.

As soon as that happens, he hangs up. Janis and Cady both blink at the screen for a moment before bursting into hysterical laughter.

"I don't know what I was expecting," Janis sighs affectionately as she slips her phone back into her pocket. Cady feels her own buzz against her leg and pulls it out to see several incoming texts from Damian that mainly consist of ABSKEOWIWHWJWJABDHWOWOA.

She clocks the time, then, and jumps. "Oh, shit!"

Janis startles. "What?"

"I have to go, lunch is almost over," Cady says, frantically packing up her things. "Bye babe. See you later."

Janis blinks in surprise, but returns the quick kiss Cady gives her before Cady goes rushing off. She has to find Regina before the bell rings. Not that Regina has ever felt much urge to listen to the bell.

She tries to think of an excuse as she hurries through the halls towards the cafeteria. Nothing really comes to her. She skids to a halt next to some sort of booth when she sees Regina and Aaron standing close to it.

"Hey!" she greets brightly after smoothing down her hair and adjusting her shirt. They both look at her. Aaron quirks his head when he sees what she's wearing, but he gets a faint smile.

Regina checks her nails and says, "Hey. Where have you been?"

"Oh, um..." Cady says. Shit. She wracks her brain trying to think of something. What did Janis say? "I skipped lunch."

Regina cocks an eyebrow. "Why?"

Cady smiles as she puts the pieces together. "I'm... trying to lose weight. So I look more like you guys. I just had one of these diet bars."

"Diet bars?" Regina questions. "Let me see."

Cady happily hands over the whole box of Kälteens. Regina holds it between her hands to try to read. Aaron peeks over her shoulder to try to see too.

"It's all in Norwegian or something," Regina says, looking at Cady in confusion.

"Swedish," Cady corrects before she can stop herself. "There's... um... this ingredient in them that you can't get here yet. My mom used to use them to lose weight in Kenya."

"Hm," Regina nods. "Can I keep these?"

"Sure!" Cady says brightly. She has a feeling Regina would've kept them even if she said no. Works for me.

"Now, are you getting me my candy cane?" Regina hums. Cady frowns in confusion before she realizes she's talking to Aaron.

"What happened to losing weight, those things are pure sugar," Aaron chuckles. Regina brushes his hair off his forehead and runs her fingers through it so it stays out of his face.

"But it's such a nice thing to do for your girlfriend," she pouts. "And stop pulling your hair down, you look so hot with it pushed back. Don't you think so, Cady?"

"Huh? Oh, uh, yeah, way hotter," Cady says. Two months ago that would've made Cady want to go for the jugular. Now? She couldn't care less.

Aaron sighs and begrudgingly leaves his hair the way Regina sort of styled it. "Alright, move over, since you so desperately need this candy cane."

He leans over the booth selling them to fill out one of the paper slips that'll eventually get tied to a candy cane and passed out in class. Cady giggles into her hand when she realizes Damian is the one in the budget Santa Claus costume behind the booth.

"Cady, remember, student parking lot after school," Regina says as she laces her pink-taloned fingers through Aaron's and leads him off to... wherever they're going. Most definitely not class.

"Got it! Bye," she says. She can feel her face relax as soon as they're turned around and can't see her anymore. Cady goes to the booth and leans across it. "Hi Dame."

"Ho ho ho, happy holidays! Would you like a candy cane?" 'Santa' replies. Cady laughs again.

"Hey, does Regina ever send any of these things?" she asks.

"Nah, she only gets them," Damian replies in his normal voice. "You want any?"

"One please," Cady replies, taking a pen with a smirk on her face.

—————

Cady sighs a little to herself as she follows Regina and the others into her house. Gretchen and Karen chat with Regina's mom. Regina huffs and rolls her eyes, straight off to her bedroom. Cady says a quick and polite hello and takes a handful of the offered snacks. She nibbles on the sunflower seeds while she mulls over what to do next.

Regina took the bars. As long as nobody recognizes them, she should be in the clear there. How can she make them work faster? Kälteens do work quickly, but Cady wants results as soon as possible. For Janis.

What makes you gain weight quickly? Cholesterol, but Cady doesn't want to do anything permanent. This is just to teach Regina a lesson, then she can lose the weight again. Sugar? Yeah. Carbs.

Cady smiles to herself as she puts a plan in place.

"Alright, you girls go find Regina. You'll do great," Mrs. George says after however long. Cady jumps when she remembers where she is.

"Thank you, Mrs. George," she calls as she goes running after Gretchen and Karen up to Regina's room.

"You're welcome!" the woman calls after them.

Regina tosses a hanger at her as soon as Cady walks into the room. "Here. I know, the costumes are fugly."

"I think they're kinda cute," Cady says, holding the outfit out so she can see it all.

"The hat has fucking jingle bells on the top, Cady," Regina huffs, handing Cady hers. She shakes it a little bit, and sure enough, there's a quiet jingling. "Go make sure it fits, but we really just need to work on making sure the hat doesn't hit the ground or fall off while you tumble."

"Okay," Cady says. Gretchen and Karen just changed in front of each other, but Cady sneaks off to the en-suite and locks the door behind her. She looks at herself in the mirror and takes a deep breath.

Janis was right, I do look Plastic, she thinks. Cute, though. Her loss.

She carefully takes off her clothes and tugs on the red-and-white striped tights. She has to jump to get the super stretchy material all the way up, but she manages with only one faceplant. Then comes the green dress, with gold buttons down the bodice, short sleeves with puffed shoulders, a belt at her waist, and red and gold trim around the hem with a collar to match.

It's not a great fit. Hesitantly, she unlocks the door and steps back into Regina's room with an, "Um."

Regina looks at her and laughs. "I kinda thought that would happen, these costumes are all huge. I swear they think we're all fat cows or something. My mom will tailor it for you."

Cady looks down at the very strangely fitting dress. There's a lot of space in between her belly and the dress, and not a lot in between it and her boobs. The skirt hits about mid-thigh, which is entirely too long, if Gretchen and Karen's are anything to go by. The sleeves are both uncomfortably tight in her armpits and loose everywhere else.

Other than that, it's great. At least the tights fit.

"Go change again, she'll get your measurements before you leave."

Cady nods and slips gratefully back into the restroom. She snaps a quick picture before she changes and sends it to Janis.

She's stuck with the dress over her head when she hears her phone go off, presumably with Janis' answer. She wriggles more in a ditch attempt to free herself, which gets her nowhere even faster.

Eventually, she escapes, heaving for breath and her hair all frizzy. She peels off the tights and puts on her non-elf clothes. Regina takes the hanger as she passes her on her way into her bathroom while Cady is occupied checking her phone.

jayjay: cutie

cadygirl: You like it?

jayjay: ofc i do

jayjay: my dorky little elf

cadygirl: Hey!

jayjay: do u get ears and shit

cadygirl: Yeah

cadygirl: Regina's really mad about it

jayjay: holy shit that's amazing

jayjay: reginald in elf ears

cadygirl: I don't get it I think they're cute

jayjay: i think ur cute

"Who are you texting?" Karen asks. Cady leaps a solid foot in the air as she materializes over her shoulder. "Not enough emojis."

"Um..." Cady stutters. Her immediate instinct was to blush and press her phone to her chest so they can't see. Now Gretchen and Karen are both looking at her suspiciously. "Uh... my... g- boyfriend."

"Boyfriend?!" Gretchen squeals sharply. "You can't get a boyfriend without telling us!"

"I can't?"

"Not without your best friends' approval! You wouldn't buy a skirt without asking your friends if it looks good on you," Gretchen hums.

"I wouldn't?" Cady replies in confusion.

"Exactly!"

Cady just blinks.

"So who is it?" Karen asks eagerly.

"Oh, you don't know him," Cady says immediately. Because it's not a him. It's not technically a lie. Right?

"He's not, like, thirty, right?" Gretchen asks in concern, the furrow in her brow deepening the longer Cady goes without answering.

"No! No, ew," Cady replies with a grimace. "Uh... he... goes to another school."

"Which one?"

"Um... do you remember that school we played right before Thanksgiving break? The away game when we stayed at the hotel?"

"Roosevelt?" Gretchen asks. Sure.

"Yeah. He goes there," Cady replies. "His name is... Jasin. With... an I."

"Ooh, unique!" Gretchen coos. "Is he cute? You have to introduce us soon!"

"Well, I don't think he's... everyone's type, but I think he's cute," Cady replies sheepishly.

"Aww, you're blushing!" Karen says. Cady blushes harder.

"Shut up," she scoffs. Karen's face falls. "No, wait, I didn't mean it like that-"

"It's okay," Karen says quietly.

"I'm really sorry, Kare," Cady says. Karen gives her a look Cady can't read. Not that Karen is ever easy to read.

"Don't worry about it."

Cady gently squeezes her arm. Karen smiles faintly at her.

"Do you have pictures of him?" Gretchen asks eagerly.

"No," Cady says immediately. "Uh... he's really shy, we don't, like, send pictures of ourselves much. We just like to see each other in person and text and stuff."

"Aww," they both coo. Gretchen continues, "Well, get one soon! We gotta make sure he's hot enough for you."

"I'll try," Cady giggles. "Oh, could we like... not tell Regina right away? It's all new, still, I don't want her to freak out about our image if we break up or whatever. We've only been together for, like, two weeks."

"Our lips are sealed," Gretchen replies immediately.

"But I'm not using SuperGlue as Chapstick again," Karen adds.

"No, that's okay, K, don't do that," Cady says immediately. "Thanks guys."

"Alright sluts, put on these... eugh. I can't even call them hats," Regina says as she parades back into the room. She chucks one at each of them rather aggressively. Cady's ends up hitting her full force in the face when she's too slow to react.

Regina watches as the three of them carefully push all her very expensive furniture out of the way so they have enough room to flip without fear of crashing into anything. Cady asks why they're not just practicing outside, and Regina goes on a solid ten minute rant about being seen in those costumes more than they have to. Cady doesn't speak for the rest of the evening.

—————

"Did Regina's boobs get bigger?" Cady hears the boy behind her in chemistry class ask about two weeks later, apparently as a conversation opener with his equally-jock-douchebag lab partner.

"Dude, totally," jock-douchebag replies. "Aaron's a lucky guy."

"Isn't she still dogging Shane?" bro number one asks. Cady tries to hide a shudder at the mention of his name.

Bro the second shrugs. "Probably."

Dammit, we made her hotter, Cady huffs to herself as she slides her goggles down over her eyes and turns on the bunsen burner. She looks over and sees Janis with a similarly disgruntled look on her face.

She gestures subtly for Cady to focus. Cady snaps back into the real world, this time before she can set herself on fire. She risks one glance back and sees Janis chuckle to herself, biting her lips to stop before anyone can see and ask what she's laughing about. Cady smiles to herself and buckles down to set some Doritos on fire. Not myself, thank you very much.

—————

Cady is laser focused in calculus another two weeks later. Not on calculus, but... she's there, it's fine.

She jumps and bangs her knee against her desk when Santa Claus slams the door open with a bellowed, "HHHHHOOOOO!"

"Jesus Christ," Ms. Norbury sighs, picking up her shattered chalk bits after she dropped it in shock. "Make it quick."

"One candy cane gram for Shane Oman," Damian says, adjusting his very poor quality fake beard as he hands Shane his candy cane.

He holds it between his first and index fingers like a pair of dirty underpants and leaves Shane to snatch it. Damian wipes his hand on his red velvet Santa coat like Shane has some sort of hetero cooties he might catch.

"Four for Glenn Coco!" Damian continues. "Hohoho, you go, Glenn Coco. Two for Caddy Heron!"

Cady frowns in confusion. Two? She only bought one. She takes them with a smile as Damian wiggles his way between the rows to deliver them. "Thanks, D."

Damian winks at her and moves on to deliver the next few candy canes to the lucky recipients.

Cady checks the tags on hers. There's the fake one, the one she wrote herself. She smiles to herself as she reads the little red slip of paper on the second one.

Merry Christmas my little elf

<3, J

ps ur short lolololol

She rolls her eyes as she reads the very loving message from her girlfriend and unwraps the end of the candy cane. She sucks on it as she continues pretending to pay attention when Damian leaves and Ms. Norbury can resume her lesson.

——

"Sorry I'm late!" she pretend-puffs as she stumbles her way into the gym. Regina just glares at her from across the room, but Gretchen comes scrambling over to join her as she plops her still-open bag on the ground. "God, I was in the middle of a problem when the bell rang, I didn't even have time to get packed up-"

"You got a candy cane?" Gretchen asks softly. She picks it up and unfolds the tag to read.

"Oh, yeah, Regina sent me one! Isn't she just the best friend?"

"R-Regina?" Gretchen squeaks. "Thanks for being such a great best friend. ...Cute."

"She didn't give you one?" Cady asks with faux-sympathy. She's heard it from the mouth of the lioness herself. There's no way Gretchen got any.

Gretchen shakes her head frantically. "She never sends them."

"Oh. Weird," Cady replies. "Well, you can have that one if you want. I had another one."

"I have to go," Gretchen chokes around floods of tears. Shit. Maybe Gretchen is a little more fragile than she thought.

"Gretchen," she says pleadingly, running after her friend to the bathroom.

"Well, i-if you and Regina are best friends now... then you can be in charge of keeping all her secrets," Gretchen says as soon as the door closes behind Cady.

Cady just nods. She can tell Gretchen is about to ramble, she doesn't dare interrupt her.

"Like, for example, she bought you those shoes just to make fun of you! Be-because she knew you wouldn't be able to walk in them. And she's not really blonde!"

Cady's eyes widen. She's not? Her eyes flick to the door as she hears a shocked gasp come from the other side. Was that... Damian?

"Her natural color is dark blonde. Also she totally cheats on Aaron!"

Cady almost chokes.

"Every Thursday she says she has a cheer intensive but she totally just stays behind to hook up with Shane Oman in the lion costume!"

"She makes him wear the costume?" Cady asks in disgusted horror.

"No! They're both in the costume!" Gretchen bellows, snapping the candy cane in half and dropping the pieces to the floor. Cady's jaw drops.

"Oh my god."

"And I never told anyone because I am such a good friend! I-I'm gonna go fill up my water bottle. Cover for me?" Gretchen sniffles. Cady nods.

Gretchen ducks out of the room. Damian enters before the door even closes, and Janis slams her way out of the stall. Damian hysterically whimpers, "I wear that costume!"

"Cads, that was amazing! What did you do?!" Janis says with an adorably delighted smile on her face. She rushes up and grabs Cady by the arms, spinning her around before she leans in for a kiss.

"Just a little Christmas magic," Cady responds with a grin of her own as soon as they break apart. "I sent myself a candy cane but I signed it as being from Regina."

"Clever girl," Janis coos in a horrible accent. Cady giggles.

"Okay, I gotta go! Love you guys." Janis gets another kiss and Damian gets a quick hug before Cady runs back to the gym to start their last parade practice.

————-

Cady grumbles as she wakes up the next morning. It's barely morning, the sun hasn't even risen yet. She has to be in the city, an hour away, two hours before the parade starts at 8:00. And she has to be there with her hair and makeup already done.

She does consider herself a morning person, but four in the morning is a bit much for anyone.

She grumbles as she hauls herself out of bed and stumbles to the restroom. She turns on the light and resists the urge to wince and close her eyes. How am I meant to be a jolly elf on five hours of sleep?

Cady opens her eyes extra wide, looking a little past unhinged when she sees herself in the mirror, to let the light in and hopefully wake her up.

By the time she's done brushing her teeth, she doesn't squint in the light anymore. She still grumbles sleepily as she washes her face, though.

She brings up the photo Regina sent (accompanied by many profanities) of what her makeup should look like so she can copy it. It's honestly not very different from her usual cheer makeup. Foundation, lots of gold eyeshadow, black mascara, red lipstick. Pretty much the only difference is the bright pink blush that she leaves in neat little circles on the apples of her cheeks instead of blending it up her cheekbones to look more natural. It's a little more rag doll than elf, but maybe it'll work better with the costume on.

She does her hair in two french braids, parted as close to even as she can get down the middle of her head and twisted intricately so they won't fall out after a morning of being mostly upside-down. She gives up on each braid a bit before the end, and ties the bands around halfway down instead of at the ends. Kind of a cute look, she thinks, as she fluffs out her curls at the end of each braid.

"You ready, binti? Have a Kälteen bar," her mother says when she trudges her way downstairs. Cady grabs the bar and takes a disgruntled bite out of it. She nods.

"You're sure this Regina friend can bring you home? We have to leave right from-"

"Right from the parade, I know, Dad," Cady says. "I quadruple checked, I'll make it home fine. Have fun at the vet conference."

"Oh, we will," her mother promises. "There's a keynote speaker on upgrades in euthanasia technology."

"...Cool," Cady replies.

"Right?! Alright, go get in the car. You sure you have everything?"

"Yeah. Regina has my outfit, I'll get changed there," Cady says. She looks down and brushes some wrinkles out of her Christmas jammies that Janis bought her. She smiles at the memory. My little dork.

"Time to hit the road, then!" her dad says. Cady shrieks as he hoists her off the ground and marches out towards the car.

"Dad!"

Her dad just starts bellowing the chorus to I Love a Parade, probably really irritating their poor neighbors. Cady gets affectionately tossed in the backseat, and her dad continues singing as her parents get into their spots up front and start the drive to Chicago.

————-

"Binti, we're here," her mother says. Cady jumps and snorts, bashing her head against the window she had fallen asleep against. "Ooh, be careful."

"Shit," Cady hisses under her breath, rubbing her new sore spot.

"Language," her dad chides, only half-serious.

"Sorry daddy. Have fun in Peoria. I love you," Cady says, bending at a weird angle to hug her parents goodbye. They can only stay long enough to see the beginning of the parade, so she has to get her goodbyes in now.

"We will. Be safe, have fun. No boys," her mother says, gently patting her back.

"I know, I know. You don't have to worry about that," Cady chuckles. Really. You have no idea.

"Atta girl. Go get em, tiger," her dad says, opening the door for her and sending her out. "Love you!"

"Yeah, love you too," Cady says, briefly walking backwards to talk to them. She gives them a final wave before she turns around and starts running to her team's meeting spot. "Yeesh. I'm sixteen."

Regina, once again, chucks her costume at her as soon as she's within sight. Cady manages to catch it this time, and looks around for somewhere private to change. The only place is behind some trees, so she heads that way.

Regina's mom is a talented seamstress and tailored Cady's costume to fit her perfectly. Almost too perfectly. It's so tight against her chest and her belly that she can barely breathe, and the skirt juuuuust barely passes her bum. The candy cane-esque tights are all she has left to protect her modesty.

The shoes with pointy toes and jingle bells are a recent addition, and she jangles her way back over to her friends. "Hey."

"Hey!" Karen greets, too brightly for six in the morning.

"Are your costumes, like, really tight?" Regina huffs, shifting her arms around to try to stretch the fabric a little. "They were huge, my mom can't have fucked up the tailoring this bad."

"Mine's okay," Cady shrugs. Her hat jingles for emphasis.

"Ugh, I'm gonna go see if she has any safety pins," Regina grumbles. Cady's phone pings as she stomps off through the frost-covered grass.

jayjay: good mornin buttercup

cadygirl: >:|

jayjay: what ?

jayjay: not a good morning??

cadygirl: Sent a picture: It's 6 in the morning and I look like this

cadygirl: And I'm cold >:|

jayjay: aww

jayjay: someone's grumpy

cadygirl: Yeah >:||||

jayjay: steve and i will be there to see you

cadygirl: Yaaaaay 🥰🥰

jayjay: that easy to cheer you up huh

cadygirl: It'd be even easier if you bring me food

jayjay: little conwoman

cadygirl: Whaaaat nooooo

jayjay: i'll take you to breakfast after

jayjay: hobbit

cadygirl: Hey!!

jayjay: not because you're short

jayjay: this time

jayjay: bc they're hungry all the time

cadygirl: Oh

cadygirl: Still v rude of you

jayjay: if i take you to get a happy meal will that make up for it

cadygirl: Yes <333

jayjay: done

jayjay: see you soon peanut

cadygirl: See you soon gorgeous 😘

Cady suddenly feels much warmer as she puts her phone back into her bag. She and Gretchen glue each other's ears on and the whole team does a warmup and stretch routine together. Cady rolls out her wrists and finally smiles as she gets into her spot.

——

The parade is more fun than she was expecting. It's less intense than what she has to do at games, more walkovers and limbers than tucks and punches. She gets a little dizzy, and it's hard not to get run over by the float on the rare occasions she fumbles a landing, but it's still fun. For once, the smile on her face is genuine the whole time.

She waves dorkily when she passes her parents. They both have their phones held up to film and proud smiles beaming across their faces. They wave back just as dorkily before they duck out and are off to their seminar.

Cady doesn't get to do much in the way of the more limber skills anymore. It's fun. She kind of misses doing skills just for fun, for herself. As long as she stays in her spot she can do whatever she wants to. She does all sorts of front walkovers, back walkovers, aerials, the occasional handspring. It's refreshing.

Whenever they come to a stop is when things get interesting. Nobody wants to see a parade stuck in place, so they practiced lots of choreography for that. One of the floats ahead of them gets stuck on a corner, and Cady does a vaulted flip off of Regina's crouched form like a really, really elaborate game of leapfrog. Regina acts like she's dancing with her and whirls her back around so they're in their right spots before they get going again.

Towards the end of the parade, Cady hears a, "Hi Cady!"

She's not supposed to, but she looks over. Stevie is waving eagerly to her, her arm linked with one of her friends. Janis is behind her with a cute grin on her face as she sees Cady in all her elvish glory. Cady wiggles her fingers back in greeting, and kisses the tips of her fingers twice before blowing the kisses in their direction. Janis smiles wider and sneakily blows one back. Stevie just squeals and dances around with her friend. Cady adds a little more flair to her skills than she needs to just for them.

Things stop and start a lot more as the first floats get to the end of the parade route and have to navigate pulling off to the sides of the road or getting where they need to be. Cady and Regina do their series of tricks at least six times. They start adding little bits of flourish to it when it begins to feel boring and repetitive.

Apparently a little too much flourish. Regina does a dramatic turn before she crouches to be Cady's vault.

Cady's already running.

She has no time to stop as Regina's safety pin breaks.

And her costume comes off.

Regina screams and bends down to try to grab it. Cady slips on the fabric and goes head over heels the wrong way. Cameras are already out, pictures and videos being recorded. Apparently more people from North Shore make the trip out to see the parade than they thought.

But Cady can't hear the shutters clicking or the agitated murmuring over the pop her ankle makes as she lands, and the roaring of blood in her ears as a horrific pain radiates up her leg. No, no, no no no nononono.

One of the coaches was walking alongside the float in between them and the crowd to make sure it all went smoothly. She rushes up and helps Regina get herself situated. "You alright, Heron?"

Cady can only sob. My ankle is broken. My ankle is broken and it really hurts. My ankle is broken and I may never be able to tumble again. My ankle-

"Whoa, kid, hey," her coach says. "Can ya walk? Right flank, fall in! You're down a man!"

Cady hops and hobbles her way to the end of the route and sits down on the curb, cradling her ankle and sobbing.

"Are your folks around?"

Cady shakes her head. "Re-Regina's take-taking me home."

Her coach hums and nods. "She ran off. Hope she's okay, too. Dang, kid, that looks gnarly."

That only makes Cady cry harder. What if I just did my last flip?

"I'll uh... go keep an eye out for George," her coach says. She does have the decency to bring Cady her bag. Cady debates texting her parents to let them know, but they're probably already halfway to Peoria. And they were so excited about the keynote, she can't drag them away from that. She'll just have to suck it up.

The pain is... almost bearable. It's not, but she doesn't exactly have much choice. Her sobs slow, and before too long she's just sniffling on the side of the road and holding her sore leg.

She about jumps out of her skin when she hears a, "Caddy!"

"Jesus Christ, Janis! There's people around here!" Cady hisses. Janis' face falls a little.

"Sorry."

"What are you doing here?" Cady asks more gently.

"There's already like, seventy different people sharing videos of you and Regina falling, what the hell happened?"

"I think the Kälteen bars backfired," Cady sniffs, shutting one eye as a wave of pain radiates from her ankle.

Janis frowns. "What do you mean?"

"She's gained so much weight her costume didn't fit," Cady explains through half-grit teeth.

Janis snorts. Cady glares at her. "Sorry."

"She safety pinned it on and it broke and I slipped on the costume," Cady continues. "And I fucked up my landing and I think my ankle is broken."

"Yikes," Janis says in concern.

"She was supposed to take me home," Cady says, trying to stretch out her leg and wincing in pain. Janis winces too.

"Damian and I will take you to the hospital, don't worry about it," Janis says immediately.

"Don't- ow- don't you have Stevie with you?" Cady asks in concern.

"Nah, she wanted to go to her friend's house, I'm free of the child until tonight," Janis replies. "Can I see?"

Cady looks at her hesitantly. Janis looks back. She doesn't push. There are a lot of people around. But Cady needs the comfort of her girlfriend right now. She nods.

Janis carefully eases her stupid jingly boot off her foot, pausing whenever Cady makes a pained noise. By the end Cady has her bottom lip so firmly between her teeth she can taste blood and her eyes screwed shut. It's still not enough to stop a few pained tears slipping out and down her face.

It becomes quickly apparent that Janis has absolutely no idea what she's doing. She gives Cady's foot a gentle, inquisitive poke and pulls back like she's been burned when Cady squeaks in pain. "Sorry."

"It's okay," Cady says, looking at her through squinted eyes and trying to remember how to breathe.

"It's pretty swollen," Janis says in concern. "And bruising already."

Cady sniffs again, looking down at her stupid candy-cane patterned lap. Janis gently tips her chin up.

"It'll be okay, Cads," she murmurs.

"But what if it's not?" Cady hiccups. "What if I never walk on it again? What if I can never do another flip?"

"And what if it's totally fine? What if it turns out to just be a bad sprain and you're back on your feet in a week?" Janis retaliates.

Cady feels her lip tremble. Janis might be right.

But they both know she's not.

"They're coming, hide," Cady says when she hears the cheers coming down the road. Thank god Damian's almost here.

Janis looks at her oddly, sadly, but she obediently ducks behind the tree line to wait for the crowd of people they actually know to clear out.

"Cads! Hey, coach told me you fell, what the hell, babe?!" Damian says as soon as he sees her, sprinting full tilt over to her. "Oh, yikes."

"Is it bad?" Cady asks, feeling tears brimming behind her eyes yet again.

"It's not... great," Damian replies hesitantly. "Can you move it?"

Cady sniffles. "I don't know, I haven't tried."

"Can I?"

Cady nods. Damian carefully braces her ankle with his large, warm hand and gives her foot a gentle wiggle. Several people look in their direction at the noise Cady makes in response.

"Alright, well," Damian says in a voice a solid three octaves higher than normal.

"I'm sorry," Cady sobs.

"Babe, shh," Damian soothes. "I will donate you one of my feet if I have to. We'll go get you patched up and all that, don't worry about it."

"But how will you be a big Broadway star someday if you only have one foot?" Cady giggles wetly.

"I'll manage. Is that Janis peeping at me through the bushes over there?"

"Probably," Cady replies with another giggle. She turns around and sees a familiar pair of blue eyes poked out from behind a gnarled old tree trunk. Janis ducks back behind it when she sees she's been spotted, and Cady smiles. "Yeah. Dork."

Damian smiles too. "She really loves you. Let me text her so she doesn't get picked up for stalking or some shit."

"She does?" Cady sniffles.

"Girl, are you kidding? We haven't had a conversation where you haven't come up at least once since September," Damian says absently as he taps out a message to Janis.

Janis is close enough that they hear her phone ping and her muffled, "Shit!" Cady can't help but laugh.

"Alright, she'll meet us at the car and we'll take you to the hospital."

"Thanks, papa elf," Cady grins. Damian laughs and tosses Cady onto his back to carry her the half-mile back to the parking lot. "These bells are infuriating."

"I think they're fun," Damian replies, a hand over his heart. He wiggles his head to make his hat jingle for emphasis. Cady giggles.

"Thanks for taking me home. I dunno what happened to Regina," Cady says quietly.

"Nobody does, she disappeared after the... incident," Damian replies. Cady frowns.

"Weird."

"I took over on your side so it was still balanced, but apparently she just ran off naked through the woods. Guess you can cross that off your list," Damian says. Cady laughs.

"You make a great elf," she replies. "Your ear keeps poking me, though."

"Sorry," Damian chuckles. "Alright, madam, we have arrived at your chariot."

"'Sup nerds," Janis greets, pushing herself off Damian's mom's car with a small salute.

"Caddy gets front seat privileges, she's broken."

"Ugh!" Janis groans sarcastically. Cady giggles.

"Um, actually... can I sit in the back with you?" she mumbles shyly.

Janis smirks. "We gonna make out?"

Cady rolls her eyes. "Corndog."

"What?!" Damian giggles.

"Is that not right?" Cady replies shyly.

"Did you just call me a corndog?!" Janis cackles.

"Someone tell me what I meant to say!" Cady insists.

Damian barely manages to put her down safely before he almost collapses to the ground in laughter. "Did-did you mean horndog?"

"Yes!" Cady says. "Stop laughing, it's not funny!"

"Yes it is!" Janis chokes through her laughter.

"People are staring, shut up!" Cady hisses. "Stop laughing!"

"Okay, okay," Damian says, wiping tears from his eyes. "Get in, sluts and slurs."

As soon as the doors close, Janis and Damian burst into laughter again. Damian can barely turn the key to start the car, he's laughing so hard. "I didn't mean to say corndog, stop laughing."

"You're so cute," Janis hums, still giggling to herself. "How's the ankle doing?"

"Hurts," Cady sighs.

Janis pouts and pulls Cady into a cuddle. Cady leans into her shoulder with a wince as another burst of pain radiates up her leg. "Poor baby."

—-

After an interesting drive to the nearest urgent care, Janis scoops Cady out and carries her baby-style into the waiting room. The pain is starting to get to Cady again, and she winces and cries quietly as Janis cradles her in her lap.

Luckily, people are so focused on their own injuries or other ailments that two Christmas elves and their art freak barely catch their eye. There's a mother there with a clearly sick little boy snuffling into her shoulder, a duo of frat bros who are clearly drunk and each cradling one arm close to their chest, and an old man in the corner filling out a crossword puzzle from 2011.

"How did your hat survive that whole thing?" Janis asks as Damian plops into the seat next to them with Cady's paperwork.

"I glued it to my head," Cady sniffs. Damian drops his pen in shock.

"You what?!"

"Only in the front, I used clips in the back," Cady replies. Damian sighs and rests his hand on his chest.

"Do not scare me like that," he replies. "Cads, when's your birthday?"

"July thirtieth," Cady says softly.

"Hey, my birthday's in July too!" Damian says. "Twinsies."

Cady can't help but giggle at his desperate attempt to cheer her up. "When's yours?"

"The thirteenth," Damian says.

"Man, I'm still the baby!" Cady huffs. "Miss January over here."

"Not my fault my parents know how to celebrate Easter," Janis shrugs. Cady gasps.

"Janis Sarkisian, we are in public!"

"Whatcha gonna do about it, tiny?" Janis retaliates. "Since we are in public."

"Hmph," Cady grumbles. She cuddles closer into her girlfriend's warm neck.

"You okay?" Janis whispers against her forehead.

"Hurts," Cady whispers back. "Are they gonna see us soon?"

"Probably not," Janis sighs.

Damian goes to hand in her paperwork at the front desk. Beyond that, all they can do is wait.

-

And wait they do. But, eventually, a nurse calls Cady's name and Janis stands to carry her back. Damian follows quickly, running after them through the winding halls.

"Alright, what seems to be the problem?" the nurse says. She does a double take when she sees the elf with one shoe on sitting on the exam table. She snorts a quick laugh but bites her lip to stop herself.

"I think I broke my ankle," Cady says softly. The doctor looks down at her one exposed foot and winces.

"It looks like that might be the case, hon. What happened?" the nurse asks, taking Cady's vitals. "Cross your arm over your chest."

Cady does when she fastens a blood pressure cuff around her wrist. "Um, I was in the parade this morning and I slipped on... something. I fumbled a flip and landed on it weird."

"Did you hear a pop when you landed or was it just a feeling?"

"I heard something pop, and I can't put any weight on it," Cady says anxiously. "And it's a little numb, and kinda... tingly, I guess."

"Mm," the nurse hums. "I'm gonna try and move it a bit, you let me know if anything hurts, alright?" Cady nods and braces as the mere brush of her fingertips against her ankle sends more waves of pain flooding up her whole leg and out her toes. "That hurt?"

"Mmhmm," Cady squeaks.

"Hm," the nurse hums again. "I'm gonna get the doctor to get you an x-ray, alright?

"Thank you," Cady says. She looks down at her lap with a quiet sniffle. She shakes her other foot and humphs at the jingle she gets in response.

"You okay, Peanut?" Janis asks quietly.

"What if it is actually broken?" Cady asks desperately. "I'm the head flyer, broken bones take so long to heal! It'll be weeks before I'm back in, what are they gonna-"

"We have protocols for this kinda thing, Cads, it'll be okay," Damian says. "We get injured all the time. I broke my wrist cheering in middle school and everything was fine. You just gotta take your time to heal."

"But-"

"If it is broken and you try to do anything you could hurt yourself permanently," Janis says. "Repetitive fractures? You have to rest. And we don't know for sure that it's broken yet, it might just be a bad sprain."

Cady sighs and nods. "Thanks for coming with me."

"Anytime, babe," Damian says, gently wrapping an arm around her shoulders and resting his head against hers. Cady blinks as his elf ear almost pokes her in the eye. Janis joins in too, and gets a jingle bell up the nose.

Her little crew gets left behind as Cady hops after the doctor towards the x-ray room. She holds as still as she can on the uncomfortable table and listens to the deafening clunks of the machine as it whirls around her foot. It's so loud she's a little worried it'll explode, but the doctor eventually returns from behind the lead partition and leads her back to her room to wait for the results.

It's a very quick wait.

"Your ankle is broken," the doctor says as soon as she walks into the room.

Cady feels her face crumple, and Janis wraps her in a tight hug as Cady lets out a quiet sob. "It's okay, Peanut, shh."

"It'll heal fine, no surgery needed. We call it a nondisplaced fracture, so none of your bones have actually moved out of where they're meant to be. You just need a cast for a little bit and you should be back to normal."

"So-so I'll still-still be able to-to cheer?"

"Not for six to eight weeks, but yes," the doctor replies with a smile. Janis squeezes her tighter as Cady releases a sob of relief.

"I told you," she murmurs, kissing Cady's cheek. Cady sniffles and leans into her shoulder. She needs Janis right now.

"Technically you broke your leg, the bottom part of your fibula here, and there's a hairline fracture in part of your tibia. But they're not displaced enough for you to need surgery, just a cast and no weight bearing for a good while."

"O-okay," Cady sniffs.

"You might wanna... de-elf yourself before we get the cast on, though. Unless you want to keep those tights for a few weeks."

Cady takes the wheel of possible cast colors and the pajamas Damian hands her from her bag. "These are cute! Where'd they come from?"

"Janis got them for me," Cady says with a sniffle as the doctor leaves and Janis and Damian both turn around to give her some privacy to change.

"Oh, did she now? How very soft of her," Damian hums. Janis shoves him. Damian sticks his tongue out in her general direction, unable to tell quite where she is with his hands firmly over his eyes.

"Shut up," Janis responds.

"Stop fighting, you can turn around now," Cady says once she's back in her comfy pajamas. "Which color cast should I get?"

"What's your favorite color?" Damian asks.

"Yellow," Cady replies.

"The purple is cool too," Janis says, tapping the little swatch of it. Cady nods.

Damian leans in close to see all the options. "I like the green."

"I like green," Cady acknowledges. "The Plastics will kill me if I get anything except pink, though."

"Pfft, who cares about them? Regina did this to you," Janis scoffs.

"Because we made her gain weight," Cady retaliates. "This light pink is cute."

"Do whatever you want, Cupcake."

"Cupcake?" Damian responds immediately, accompanied with a gag.

"Look at this little faaaaace," Janis coos, leaning harder into it and squishing Cady's cheeks rather than trying to fend off her friend. Cady goes along with it too, batting her eyelashes coquettishly at him. "Isn't she just the cutest widdle thing?"

"You two are gonna ruin my life together, aren't you?"

“Mm-hmm!" Cady hums happily, her cheeks still smushed in her girlfriend's hand. Damian rolls his eyes. Janis gives Cady's squished-out lips a kiss before she lets her go and smirks at her friend.

"You're the one who was literally speechless for four hours after we told you we were dating," she responds.

"I was in shock, shut up."

"Because your matchmaking never works?"

Damian huffs. "Whatever, it does."

"Name one time."

"This!" Damian insists, gesturing frantically between the two of them. Janis rolls her eyes.

"Whatever you say, Princess," she replies. Damian smiles.

"Thank you."

The doctor returns towards the tail end of that argument and shoots Cady a confused look. Cady just shrugs a little. She hands back all the cast swatches and goes with the light pink she had liked. She does really like it, and the Plastics won't crucify her for it. Well, they might anyway for what happened at the parade, and for needing a clunky, bulky cast in the first place. But at least this'll show she has decent taste and the ability to match.

Janis and Damian each take and squeeze one of her hands as her bones are painfully squished back where they need to be and wrapped in layers upon layers of fabric. The pink shell finishes the job, and Janis asks the doctor for a Sharpie so she and Damian can be the first to sign it.

"Do it small," Cady insists. Damian shoots her a strange look, but they both sign their names in the smallest letters they can right by her toes. Janis adds a little heart by hers for good measure. "Thanks, guys."

Cady gets fit for a set of crutches. It takes a while and she ends up with kids size ones, but eventually she's clicking slowly across the parking lot and finally on her way home.

"Jan, you wanna come over?" Damian asks. Cady pouts a little. She knows he and Janis are best friends, and that they definitely hang out without her sometimes, but it's not like Damian to ask with Cady right there.

"Nah, I gotta go get Stevie," Janis replies. Damian nods. Cady is confused when they pull into Janis' driveway. She should've been dropped off first. Her house is much further out of the way. "Bye Peanut."

Cady returns the kiss she gives. "Bye, baby."

Damian gags in the front seat. "Bye, dumbass."

"Bye, slut," Janis replies, blowing him a kiss as she climbs out of the car in the most complicated way she can and runs into her house.

Damian puts the car back in gear and keeps driving. Cady is more confused when they pull into his driveway. He turns the car off and gets out, leaving Cady alone in the backseat.

"You coming?" he asks, knocking on her window upon noticing she hasn't moved. Cady jumps.

“You're not taking me home?"

"I am not leaving you alone to navigate that house with one foot. But I'll take you home if you'd rather be there," Damian responds.

Cady shakes her head. "No. No, uh... thanks."

"Of course," Damian replies. "Now come on, cripple, my mom'll make us milkshakes."

"Your mom?" Cady asks with a smile.

"Oh, shit, you haven't met her yet! Uh, be ready for like, a lot of hugs. And she might cry. She's a big empath."

"Okay," Cady giggles. "She sounds great."

"She is," Damian says with a small smile. He unlocks the door and drops their stuff in the small area for shoes and coats and bags. "Ma, I'm home! And I brought Cady!"

Stanley comes running down the hall as soon as she hears the door. Damian protectively stands in front of Cady so the excited pup doesn't knock her over, but Cady smiles and rests her crutches against the wall so she can give the sweet little thing some scritches. "Hi, Stanley! How are you, baby girl?! Oh, yes, hi! I missed you too!"

"Stanley, gentle, Caddy's broken," Damian says. Stanley actually does calm a little bit, sniffing curiously at Cady and wagging her entire rear end instead of jumping on her like she did last time.

"Hey, baby girl!" Damian's mother greets, coming down the hallway in such a blaze of glory that it's immediately apparent where Damian gets his showmanship from. Cady looks up and smiles as she wraps him in a hug.

"Hi Ma," Damian responds, hugging his mom back and handing Cady her crutches again.

"How was the parade?" his mom asks, leading the two of them down the hall. She clocks Cady hobbling after them, then. "Ah."

"Yeah, she broke her ankle," Damian responds.

"At the parade?! Oh, honey!" his mom says immediately, wrapping Cady in such a tight hug she thinks she hears a few of her ribs pop. "You poor thing! Oh, come in, come in, sit down. Damian, help her to the living room, come on now."

"Can we go to my room instead?" Damian asks. His mom rolls her eyes.

"Yes, go ahead. It's on this floor, Cady, don't worry baby."

"Thanks, Ms. Hubbard," Cady replies with a smile. She gets another tight hug and actually has to cough a little when she's released to get her breathing back in a normal rhythm.

"Of course, baby! What kind of milkshakes do y'all want?"

"Oreo?" Damian suggests. Ms. Hubbard looks to Cady, and she nods eagerly. "Please."

"Coming right up."

"Thank you," Cady says as she's off back to the kitchen.

"Don't mention it, baby!" she calls back.

"Your mom is great," Cady says. Damian nods. Cady squeaks in surprise as he hauls her onto his back and starts carrying her down the hall towards his bedroom next to the garage.

"She is."

"She's very comforting," Cady continues. Damian nods again. "I see where you get it from."

"D'aww, thanks," Damian coos. He's actually blushing a little bit, and Cady smiles as he rests her down on his cushy bed. He fusses over her like a worried mother, helping her take her makeup and ears off as Cady looks around his bedroom for the first time. She's been here before for movie nights, but only ever in the basement.

None of the actual drywall is visible; completely plastered over with posters of drag queens and black-and-white photos of old Broadway stars. Cady can barely breathe for Judy Garland and Cher and RuPaul. There's fairy lights of all colors hanging from the crown molding, illuminating and twinkling over a full wall of Playbills in protective clear plastic sleeves. The furniture is a bit plain by comparison, but it all just feels like Damian's spirit has exploded into the room. It's amazing.

"Your room is so cool," Cady says.

"Thanks!"

"You have a lot of Playbills," Cady continues. "Have you actually seen that many shows?"

"God, no," Damian chuckles. "The top row there are the only ones I've seen in person, the rest are from eBay."

"Cool," Cady replies.

"Has Janis taught you about musicals yet?"

Cady shakes her head with a smile. "She said she wouldn't be able to do it justice."

Damian snorts. "Yeah, right. She just doesn't want to sit through them."

"She doesn't like them?"

"She only watches them once a year on my birthday and if I sing a lyric that could even approach being from a musical she'll punch me in the jugular."

"Really?"

Damian nods, fiddling with the mouse to wake up the computer and typing in his pin. "You've brought a lot of her walls down. So... thanks for that."

"I'm glad," Cady replies softly. "She deserves it."

"She does," Damian agrees. He shrugs suddenly. "Anyway, what do you want to watch?"

"You pick. I don't know anything," Cady giggles. Damian nods and opens a folder full of bootlegs. He murmurs the titles under his breath until he lands on a good first musical for her.

"Ooh! Okay, here, you'll love this one. The movie is good too, but the stage production is amazing."

Cady cuddles into his arm and peeks at the file name. She squeals, "Lions?!"

"Lions is an understatement for The Lion King," Damian says. Cady wiggles excitedly as he opens it and makes it full screen. "Can you see?"

"Mmhmm. Thanks, D."

"Anytime, Little Slice."

His mom pops in with their milkshakes a few minutes in and seems completely unphased seeing her son cuddled up with a girl she's known for fifteen minutes. Apparently this is normal for him. "Thank you, Ms. Hubbard."

"You're welcome, sweet girl. Y'all just holler if you need anything, alright? Ooh, Lion King. That's a good one," she replies as she leaves again.

"Cady's from Kenya," Damian explains.

"No shit?" his mom replies, making Cady choke on her milkshake in shock.

"Um, yeah, I just moved here this summer," she says.

"Ain't that something. Alright, have fun, you two."

"Thanks, Ma," Damian says as she shuts the door behind her.

They sip at their tasty milkshakes while they watch. Cady might be in love. She's immediately bopping along to all the musical numbers and oohing and aahing over the special effects.

Damian looks at her expectantly when the curtain call is over.

"That was so cool!" she squeals. "Can we watch it again?"

Damian laughs. "I'm glad you liked it. You like musicals now?"

Cady nods eagerly. "Yeah."

"Good," Damian says with a victorious smirk. He takes a picture of them cuddled up together and sends it to Janis with a caption reading, I win Caddy likes musicals. He gets an eye roll emoji in response and clicks off his phone with a smug grin. "Let's try something else, but we'll come back if you want to after."

"Okaaaaay," Cady huffs jokingly.

They watch about four more, occasionally shifting positions to keep comfy on Damian's plush bed. The milkshakes are long gone, but neither of them care.

"Thanks for taking care of me," Cady murmurs after the last one. Damian gently bumps into her.

"Anytime. Sorry Janis was busy, I know she wanted to be the one to kidnap you."

"No, it's okay," Cady says immediately. "I love her, but she'd be so worried she'd barely let me move. Not that that's bad, she's just... a lot, sometimes."

"You love her, eh?" Damian teases. Cady blushes. "Oh, shit, do you?"

"I mean... we've only been dating for a month," Cady begins hesitantly. "But... I might... already love her, like, a lot."

"D'aaawww, my little gaybies," Damian squeals.

"Shut up," Cady scoffs.

"She loves you too," Damian says matter-of-factly.

Cady looks at him. "She does?"

"I told you earlier. This bitch will not shut up about you. I've never seen her like this. It's kind of freaky," Damian chuckles. "Always, have you seen Caddy's eyes up close? They're such a pretty green. And she's sooooo tiiiiny, she just fits in my arms like a puzzle."

"She did not say that."

"On RuPaul she did."

Cady blinks. "Did I break her?"

"Honestly? Maybe. But I like it. She's annoying sometimes, but this Janis seems... healthier."

"Good," Cady replies.

"You, on the other hand," Damian replies, looking pointedly at her left foot. Cady giggles.

"It's fixed, I'll be okay," she replies.

"You got lucky there, kid. I really thought you were gonna need surgery," Damian says.

"I did too, honestly," Cady admits.

"...And now I think about it, Regina is a little chubbier."

"Right? It totally worked!" Cady squeals. Damian laughs. "Now we just have to get people to stop treating her like the queen bee and get Aaron out of her clutches."

"Godspeed, soldier. Doing the lord's work," Damian says with a salute. Cady giggles. "Do you, like, wanna go home?"

Cady sighs. "I should."

"Bitch, is that what I asked? Do you want to or not?" Damian insists.

"I mean... it's always weird there without my parents," Cady mumbles, fidgeting with her fingers. "But I don't wanna impose."

"Hold on," Damian says. Cady jumps when he turns his head to the side and hollers, "Ma!"

"What?!" his mother yells back.

"Can Cady sleep over?!"

"Her folks okay with it?!"

"Your folks okay with it?" Damian asks Cady in a much, much softer tone. Cady nods in confusion. Damian yells back, "Yeah!"

"Then she's always welcome! Dinner's in half an hour!" his mom replies.

"Thank you!" Cady yells.

"You're welcome, baby!"

"See? Problem solved," Damian says. Cady giggles.

"You're the best, D."

"And don't you forget it."

————-

thank you for reading!!

i have a oneshot coming for y'all on wednesday that i'm very (cautiously) excited about and am working myself to the bone trying to get the next chapter of this and another oneshot done per my usual "schedule" if you can call it that lol.

i apologize for not being more prepared but i spent most of february auditioning for the tour!! so that took a lot of my focus but it's done now and i am back in as full of a swing as i can get lol.

so fingers crossed! and if i don't get it done in time you'll just get three of each with my next round of fics :)

thank you all so much again for being here. i love every little one of you muppets so dearly.

lots of love,

ezzy

[earlgreytea68]

I thought i was going crazy talking to my friend about this but I double checked with a recorded vid and like the riff btwn pete and patrick did not happen in Wrigley before the piano time like pete just thanked us for the fan project and patrick introduces the piano bit. So like I'm emo thinking about how maybe the banter wasn't always in the set but idk what's more devastating to think about patrick asking for the riff or pete starting the riff for patrick or it being something that occured naturally and they just added it in later🐉

No, you are absolutely correct, I was at the Wrigley show and there was no riff with Patrick. They played Fake Out, the stage went dark and Pete thanked the crowd for the pink seashell lights which he said looked beautiful without being lit, so I think no one expected him to talk at that point and it was spontaneous on his part in response to the lights. Then there was a long-ish pause and then Patrick said, "Hi!" and started talking to the crowd.

I remember this all vividly lol because I was trying to catch everything said but I stopped recording after Fake Out ended because the stage went dark, so I missed Pete's pink seashell project remark. And then I started recording when he started talking but the stage was dark and silent for long enough that I stopped again and missed Patrick's "hi." Hahaha this is why my memory spends its time thinking about, Idk.

ANYWAY. I've thought a lot about how the banter moment got added in. It does seem like it became a formal thing since Pete has it in his setlist, even if it started informally, although it also never seems in the least bit planned because it's always just nonsense lol. I wonder if someone thought the delay between Patrick being ready for the piano segment was long enough that it needed filler (that naturally being Pete), but the fact that it's not just Pete talking to the crowd but Pete talking to Patrick seems so much more weighted. I genuinely think it developed as a check-in, but whether Patrick explicitly asked for it or whether Pete realized he needed it without being asked, I have no idea. Both ways, as you say, are devastating to contemplate lol.

Patrick being like, "I thought we would have a moment of banter," made me think initially that Patrick asked Pete to stick around and talk to him and Pete was kind of like, "...but about what?" lol. But the way that Pete treats it makes me think that he understands it as "make sure Patrick's okay." He very frequently checks in with him to make sure he's ready before leaving the stage, and then Patrick acts like he's like, "That Pete! He's so weird!" And that would support Pete having decided to do the check-in on his own. So WHO KNOWS. All I know is that it exists and every show I'm like, "Please tell me they still did Riff with Patrick," it's very important to me lol. Idk, it also just feels fan-service-y to me in the best possible way, that every show gets their own Peterick moment on-stage, and nobody knows what either of them will actually say or do during that moment, and it's a lovely extra bit to the show that I appreciate us getting. So maybe neither Patrick nor Pete need that moment and it's all for us. EITHER WAY lol

[vvatchword]

"Wow, this BBC site is full of great nuggets for my research on Belarus. I wonder how it is on Indonesia, a country I attempted to research earlier only to find the crummiest crumbs"

This is supposed to be a fucking timeline. What the fuck happened between 1900 and 1942?! That's nearly half of a century and it's just GONE

I then went to find an old friend on DA and FB who I knew hailed from Indonesia. I'm sure he's still on the Internet somewhere but jesus fuck I can't find him. Wulfsbane my bro return to me

For the record, I had the same problem researching Indonesia earlier in the year. Turns out that nobody outside Indonesia cares about Indonesia. Which is a problem on multiple fronts.

First, you don't want a singular source. Every source is going to be biased somehow; the idea is to get a full idea with multiple biases present. Bias isn't a bad thing--it's omnipresent, it's human, and it's valuable in its own way. It tells you what people value, and those values form a bigger living picture: outsiders looking inside, insiders looking outside, factions looking at other factions, and so on. Which is why it's so important to amass as many as possible. People are not monoliths, subcultures will disagree with each other (sometimes unto death). Most important is getting insider views of their own country.

Second, it seems most Indonesian literature and history has never been translated, even great works. Which may mean that I may have to do something that gives me the heebies: try to translate things myself. I can do it, and it won't be for naught, but it's just extra work and extra work means more time.

A secondary problem of literature being untranslated means that I don't get an insider's view of the country, which is preferable. I do not want Whitey McDonald's view of the country, I want Indonesian people's views of themselves. (Biases from my culture come free lol)

A tertiary problem of untranslated literature means relying overmuch on websites and the Internet. Who's mostly on English-language internet? Whitey McDonald. Whose biases am I most likely to run into? Murican and European. This is without mentioning the proliferation of AI and other garbage, whose influence grows exponentially the less foundational material is available.

I usually double-check my sources, but there is often more fact-checking and quality put into physical publications and I want to delve into a historical period (1900-1950).

I'm also still going to try and find Wulfsbane because that guy is cool as fuck you guys have no idea. I made Amir Indonesian just because of him. One of the best human beings on Earth

[dreadwedge]

Jeremy100: Cup of piss. In the fridge in the break room. Whose?

Jeremy200: not labeled?

Jeremy300: That is my iced tea. Do not touch!!

Jeremy100: Not labeled. In the fridge door. Piss.

Jeremy200: sounds like it’s all yours dude.

Jeremy400: Could be mine, label is on bottom.

Jeremy200: why would you put the label on bottom where nobody can see?

Jeremy300: That is my iced Black Tea!! Do not touch!

Jeremy 100: No label. NOT iced tea! Whose piss?

Jeremy400: Did you lift it? The label is on the bottom of the cup so that it can be seen from below.

Jeremy200: I say just go for it man.

Jeremy100: Bottom is clean. Sides are Sticky!!!

Jeremy300: Can you check is my tea there because that is where my tea should be also.

Jeremy400: Weird, thought I labeled bottom. How yellow?

Jeremy200: Just drink it dude. If it isn’t labeled it’s up for grabs.

Jeremy100: Clear. Healthy! Not interested in drinking. I don’t see any tea.

Jeremy400: Not mine then. Weird. Is mine there? The label is on bottom where nobody can see.

Jeremy300: Did someone take my tea?

Jeremy200: Why would you label it there though. Doesn’t that defeat the purpose of the label to label it there.

Jeremy300: Dod one of you drink my tea? I won’t be mad. It’s just my special tea so I would like to know.

Jeremy100: Can we stay on topic please. Is it possible the label came off?

Jeremy300: it’s just that it’s my special tea and if you drank it you should really tell me because it is special. I wont get mad at you.

Jeremy400: Label could fall off but mine is deep yellow, almost goldenrod. That is where I like to label it. Thanks for checking

Jeremy100: Of course Jeremy400.

Jeremy300: You should not drink my tea. Can you double check it is not there.

Jeremy200: Jesus Christ ok I drank your tea.

Jeremy300: I’m not mad at you.

Jeremy200: lol

Jeremy300: but you should know that it is poisoned.

Jeremy200: ???

Jeremy200: Wtf. Will I be ok?

Jeremy300: you drank it?

Jeremy200: Yea I fukcing drank it am I poisoned now?

Jeremy300: Why would you drink it? It was not yours… :/ kind of shitty of you to drink it..

Jeremy200: ?? it literally was not labeled? Wtf man. This sucks

Jeremy100: Ok I found your tea. It was in the back behind the avocados. Labeled “evil tea?”

Jeremy200: thank god

Jeremy300: yes that is it. Thank you Jeremy100.

Jeremy100: No problem Jeremy300.

Jeremy200: wait then what did I drink

Jeremy400: Do you still have cup?

Jeremy200: yea on my desk

Jeremy100: Oh

Jeremy300: oh?

Jeremy400: Check bottom.

Jeremy300: ohhh

Jeremy200. God damn it. Why would you put the label there.

Jeremy400: >:) my trick

Jeremy400: Now you owe me glass of yours.

Jeremy200: ugh, fine. Beats being poisoned. I should have one in the fridge door. Pretty clear, kind of sticky.

Jeremy100: