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Frat Life

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my mom asked me last week if I wanted something for my birthday

I told her “nah, just money.” and then sent another text saying “Or a tattoo :P” 

She sent me a card in the mail for my birthday. It had temporary tattoos in it. 

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My friend just said somebody messaged her asking if she’d sell her nudes to them and like, ??? I’m down for that. Send me money and I’ll send you nudes

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I hope Queer Eye has as many episodes as One Piece

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either that or trick myself and call without thinking so that i don’t have a chance to freak out about it

exchanging grammatically correct emails with adults is the most uncomfortable form of human interaction in existence

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I was told the key to good comedy is to keep referencing the first joke throughout the performance

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New poem up!

Hey everyone, just uploaded another poem to Third Wheel Poetry called Searching Elsewhere. Please go check it out! 

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Yoooo guys I’m hella stoked cause I should be getting a job at the Rockshop (part of the Hardrock Cafe) in Landungsbrucken, which would mean that not only am I gonna have something to do and have an income, but I’ll probably also have colorful hair again and more tattoos soon

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[to the tune of uptown girl] im that bitch…catch me dying in a roadside ditch

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This is a wild ride

I just found two youtube channels that belong to people who dated, then broke up and made a bunch of call-out videos and videos responding to those videos and it’s just a lot of cringy back and forth angst and I can’t believe people would actually post these

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Yassssss pls post a topless pic

Sorry, for that, you’ll have to convince me in real life

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Just uploaded a poem called “Back and Forth - Black and White” 

I post poems every Tuesday, and there are six other poets that post on the other days of the week who also write some amazing stuff. Please check it out!

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Post a topless picture?

Posted

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oh hi, thanks for checking in im:

still a piece of garbage

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For the Anon - an oldie but a goodie

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Can I ask your first name?

You may, but I might give you a fake one ;) Liebe Grüße,“Sydney”

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28 May, 2018

28, 5, 18

Today I told my mom I didn’t want to be

Sent a poem written over a year ago

Been working on it for seven years or more

Past, present, and future

It’ll always be true

At different times in my life

I’ve learned to fight it

In my many years of being

But it will always be there

No matter how much I care

No matter how much she swears

I’m her baby and she’d do anything for me

It’ll keep coming back

And I’ll never feel truly free

Because deep inside of me I know

The feeling will always return:

Of no longer wanting to be