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[mlemedt]

The Catcher in the Rye- JD Salinger

💛💛💛🤍🤍 (3/5)

I was supposed to read this book a few years ago for English Classes but I was never really interested. Looking back, I think it was certainly an interesting decision to recommend to a class of 14 year olds, as it deals with similar issues as 'The Bell Jar'. I honestly think the meaning would have been lost on me.

In contrast to 'The Bell Jar,' Caulfield, our protaganist, is not restrained by societal expectation, but instead is bored of what society has to offer. I think that's quite an interesting difference. Both are set in the 1960's, and both contemplate suicide because they cannot conform to life as it is- yet whilst one is strangled by society the other struggles to find grip.

📚

----------------------------------Discussion--------------------------------

Once again, I'm slightly stumped, and once again turned to surfing reviews in order to understand the book a bit more. However, I'm finding they're often quite annoying and wonder if we even read the same book. For instance 'The Bell Jar' was described as 'darkly humorous,' which whilst I could see was definitely misinterpreted. The protagonists comments are a cutting observation of society. 'The Virgin Suicides' I had many problems with being described as a 'must have for teenagers.' I found 'The Catcher in the Rye' had many similar comments with one review on the back of the book describing it as a 'guide to adolescence.'

Certainly in some areas I would agree. Caulfield struggles to navigate the world and come to terms with the 'phoniness' of society. He dislikes tedious aspects of social etiquette, like small talk, and often finds himself tired and bored of socialisation. I really liked how vivid his character was with all his different accents and mannerisms portrayed in his speech and narration. He felt real. He was also quite ambitionless and didn't know what he wanted to do in the future- only what he didn't want.

I just think considering this novel to fulfill your understanding of adolesence, rather ignorant of the diversity of human experience. Whilst much of Caulfield's struggles are indeed widely relatable, I personally did not connect to him well.

📚

As I said, I did find I needed help discovering the aim of the novel. It was clear Caulfield found joy in childhood, as the only points in the book where he is actually content is when he is with his little sister and briefly listening to the rhymes of a passing child. The discussions around the novel seemed to confirm that it indeed battles with a loss of innocence. With his name also implying an effort to 'hold on.'

However, whilst this theme came across, it appeared more to me that Caulfield was eager to grow up. The entire novel follows him running from school and living on his own, and also his explorations into intimacy. He didn't seem to shun the adult world at all.

---------------------------------Conclusions-------------------------------

I definitely enjoyed reading this book for the consistency and vibrancy of the characters, however I've felt a little flat after finishing it. I know there's more to it, but I'm simply struggling to grasp it. I wish I could do this book and Salinger greater justice, but after two weeks procrastinating, I've come to no conclusion.

♥♥♥

-Gaia

📚

A/N

Somehow, within me writing this and procrastinating over posting I feel like the meaning has suddenly clicked. Rather than re-writing I'll briefly note it here. There was certainly a sense of loneliness throughout the book, with no consistent characters or places- Caulfield even hires a prostitute just to talk to her. There's definitely discussion about the importance of human connection- but the sort of connection were you can be understood fully. He tries discussing life and meaning with characters he visits, but none really share Caulfields desire to understand and be understood. It was certainly at these points were I felt I could relate most- throughout my own life I've found friendships tiring, and the most fulfilling are the ones where I can be authentically me, where even my short-comings are accepted.

I definitely felt this was the true theme of 'The Catcher in the Rye' - navigating people and your role in life. This I suppose could align with the views regarding adolesence as these themes are certainly a huge part of growing up.

⚠Content Warnings⚠

-Suicide Theme

-Strong Language

-Sexual Themes

[mlemedt]

🎀She Was a Punk- He Did Ballet 🖤

[mlemedt]

Six of Crows- Leigh Bardugo

💛💛💛💛💛(5/5)

Well I'm quite happy to announce that I've finished my summer reading goal and in good time too. I think I've developed a lot since the beginning of this challenge. I've read so many genres and periods and lengths- but most of all, I've proved to myself that I do have time to just sit back and enjoy a good book. Lots of people say they enjoy reading but just don't have time for it, but I think it's the actual process of sitting down and engaging with something so physically monotonous that people struggle with the most. It's difficult to indulge in something that feels so time consuming whilst there's other things to be done. We struggle to allow ourselves to sit down for more than five minutes.

This was definitely me too, and even in reading this last book it took me a couple of days to actually pick it up before I got back into the familiar pace. Anyways, I think this was quite an appropriate book to end upon. For me, at least, this book represented the beginning of new opportunities, and not just in the story- this was the beginning of a new series and a new world for me (and even a new Netflix series.)

🦅

---------------------------------Discussion---------------------------------

I'm faced with a similar issue as I did with the 'Powerless' series. I was too busy enjoying the book than finding topics for review. My main love of this story was simply the diversity of the characters. Each were incredibly unique with their own stories interwoven cleverly and realistically. This realism was maintained incredibly well also. Unlike other books I've read this summer where I've puzzled over a lack of moral questioning this novel had plenty of it. I thought it was so interesting that this criminal gang who are accustomed to killing and violence still thought about those they had killed, and wanted to respect them with burials, and even avoided killing when they could. It was an utterly realistic depiction of morality, and furthermore, Kaz's attempts to brush off morals in favour of pragmatism made him such an interesting character.

I think sometimes authors try to ignore realism like this, as if everyday emotions of guilt and respect are uninteresting. As if simply action can hold attention alone. Like I said in 'Powerless', this realisation of human emotion makes books so convincing and impactful- if you cant understand the characters, you can't connect with them. Once you put the book down, they're nothing more to be thought about. But characters that feel real hold presence in everyday life, for they enrich it with a greater breadth of emotion and compassion and understanding.

🦅

I'll admit, I watched some of the Netflix show to give me a greater idea of the characters. I knew I wanted to watch it afterwards, and getting the wrong impressions of the characters would've ruined the experience. However, in doing so I discovered the plots were almost entirely different, but I didn't mind this much when I finished the book because I was just happy to see the characters again. It didn't matter the entire plot was lost because the plot didn't mean anything. It was the characters- their fears, their passions, Kaz's genius- that's what made the novel good. It didn't matter there was no Ice Court or heist.

🦅

---------------------------------Commentary------------------------------

Another thing I loved was how different this was from typical books. The Crows are not heroes and they don't have magic powers (at least not all), their job is not for any greater purpose than money (at least initially), and it was refreshing. They were just like normal people.

I think also, the prejudice against 'Grisha' is definitely allegorical. For some nations its considered a blessing, but most reject what they cannot understand. The way this was portrayed with the Fjerdans and the Ice Court, again defied typical interpretations of this particular trope.

-------------------------------Conclusions---------------------------------

I honestly can't find anything wrong with this book. It's definitions of characters were incredibly in depth and the world thoroughly considered and thought out. However, I didn't get quite the same craving for this book as I have others. I'm not finding myself in any particular rush to get 'Crooked Kingdom,' and, to be completely honest, I don't know why.

♥♥♥

-Gaia

⚠Content Warnings⚠

-Strong Language

-Violence

[mlemedt]

☀️Summer Reads ☀️

I'm so happy to have actually completed my goal of reading 10 books this summer. This was mostly just to motivate myself back into reading again but it appears I've gained a taste for fantasy novels (I regret nothing...)

In total I have read 3509 pages. So I'm pretty proud of that. To conclude here's some made up book awards:

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-Psyche & Eros ⭐⭐⭐Luna McNamara

Raised My Standards

-In Memoriam ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐Alice Winn

Most Human

-Orphia & Eurydicius ⭐⭐Elyse John

Made Me Cry Most (Sadness + Disappointment)

-Welcome to the Hyunam-Dong Bookshop ⭐⭐Hwang Bo-Reum

Most Comforting

-The Bell Jar ⭐⭐⭐⭐Sylvia Plath

Most Cutting

-The Virgin Suicides ⭐⭐⭐Jeffrey Eugenides

BEST WORST NARRATOR

-Fake Dates & Mooncakes ⭐⭐⭐Sher Lee

Best Food + Cutest Couple

-Powerless ⭐⭐⭐⭐Lauren Roberts

BEST ROMANCE

-Reckless ⭐⭐⭐Lauren Roberts

Best Sequel

-Six of Crows ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐Leigh Bardugo

Best Characters + Best World Building (I will die on this hill)

Average Rating: 3.4

I want to challenge myself like this again but I doubt I can read as much with school around the corner- but hopefully my goal can help remind me to take a break sometimes. I'm going to give myself until the New Year to read just 12 more books. Hopefully evenings, weekends and holidays can add up to give me some time.

[mlemedt]

Reckless- Lauren Roberts

💛💛💛💛🤍(4/5)

This series is painfully addictive.

Not even 24 hours after my review of book one, I'm sat here again in front of my laptop, tapping keys away about how much I loved book two. I think I'm running off of adrenaline this time. It was easier to finish 'Reckless' because I know the next book is so far out of sight, rather than having to wait five painful days to be able to actually order book two, and then having to wait in agony for it to finally arrive. I was immediately disappointed by the length. I'm usually counting the pages at the bottom in anticipation, but reading the 'Powerless' series made it difficult for me to turn my head from the words. And when I did, I was saddened by the prospect of the story being over.

⚔

---------------------------------Discussion---------------------------------

Most of my compliments are the same as book one: well paced, beautiful characters, addictive chemistry, interesting world building. The only way in which I preferred 'Powerless' was regarding the narrative. The conceit was more animated, whereas the focal journey in 'Reckless' at points became repetitive. Not to imply I didn't enjoy it- the relationship between Kai and Paedyn was utterly addictive, but there was simply just more happening in book one. I also agreed more with the reviews regarding focus on the resistance for 'Reckless' in particular. After their separation, they're rarely given a second thought. The same goes for the characters in the previous book, and actually the whole Trial.

My only other query, was regarding the final plot twist. It was hinted at greatly so I'm not sure if it can actually count as a 'twist.' I'm definitely intrigued how it is going to shape the next book. Although I'm certainly reading for the chemistry between the protagonists, I'm slightly concerned the series is losing the power of the first book with the intimidation of the Trials and survival. Having the entire conceit of the first book barely mentioned just made it feel less like a book two and more, "Here are your favourite characters again."

⚔

I'm again struggling to find points to talk about because I was just utterly engrossed with this book. I suppose my last compliment is the dynamism of the characters. At the beginning of 'Powerless' I really hated Kai, and I wondered how I was going to get through 500 pages of him, but his character development and all his different dimensions are so well crafted, and I couldn't help loving him in the end. I was returned to those opinions of Kai at the beginning of this book and a few points during, but it was a vivid reminder of the many facets of human behaviour. I really appreciate that kind of characterisation because it's impossible to get along with every aspect of someone. People are multi-dimensional- and I think Roberts captured that well.

⚔

-------------------------------Conclusions---------------------------------

Again, I'm left with few words. There's not much to conclude. This series has left my speechless. It deserves the same rating, for the quality was not significantly worse or better. The consistently addictive writing leaves me excited for the final book, and while I wait I'll certainly read 'Powerful,' (an accompanying novel to 'Powerless.')

♥♥♥

-Gaia

⚠Content Warnings⚠

-Mild Language

-Violence

[mlemedt]

Powerless- Lauren Roberts

💛💛💛💛🤍(4/5)

This was one of those books where you fall so fervently in love that nothing can stop you turning the page, but every part of you aches because you're closer to finishing it.

I have put off writing this review for so long, because words fail to encapsulate how I felt reading it.

⚔

This was my first taste of 'booktok' and I'm surprised to say it didn't disappoint. It was well-written and perfectly paced, with convincing protagonists and compelling world building. The only area of literary facet that it perhaps lacked, was in that deeper commentary, but as I've said before this isn't necessary or even fitting in every book.

---------------------------------Discussion---------------------------------

My love for this book is inexplicable. I can't explain why I loved it so much. It hardly followed any of my usual interests and didn't have the commentary of 'In Memoriam,' which is the last book that made me feel like this. I shouldn't have liked it. Yet I craved it.

My only critique of this book was that some side characters felt a little one dimensional. Particularly Blair. She's immediately introduced as a bitch with little explanation why other than her cold demeanour. I think we're meant to dislike her because she is a rival love interest, but this portrayal is just so typical I couldn't hate her for it. She also has some unexplainable vendetta against Paedyn, which presumably is to do with Kai's attentions, but she just failed to be an interesting and believable character. I thought this was quite intriguing because Roberts actually displayed a pretty high level of emotional intelligence regarding the main protagonists. They were multi-faceted and had human motivations and emotional responses in all the appropriate situations that made them really convincing. I think that's why I liked this book so much. The complex to and fro of emotion that some authors can spend decades trying to imitate.

⚔

This was certainly the quickest I read half a thousand pages and immediately bought the next book, however I noticed some of the reviews when I did.

Some wanted greater attention on the resistance and the trials rather than the love story, and I'd agree to an extent. My initial opinion on this book was that it was very 'Hunger Games -esque,' but whereas in the Hunger Games the threat of the Games and the Capitol constantly looms, the Trials felt a lot less intimidating. The rules of the Trials weren't properly established clearly and concisely, whereas in the Hunger Games we always knew only one could survive which made the story incredibly compelling. The Second Trial too, was also a little underwhelming with little happening for the magnitude of the event. I also think Roberts could've benefited in escalating the threat of the Trials by adding more competitors, then also, more characters can be injured, with little consequence to the story, during the Trials and properly highlight the brutality of this system and how dangerous this event actually is. Very quickly the Trials were reduced to all familiar characters, which took away some of the mystery of the event. With a large group of allies there isn't as much danger, and I could tell they weren't going to turn on each other. The impact of the Trials simply simmered out quite quickly. However, the Trials weren't actually a huge part of the novel and I wasn't upset about it. I think it definitely would've elevated the novel if the Trials held a greater impact, but I was reading for the romance and simply the existence of the Trials helped elevate the emotions in that relationship.

⚔

--------------------------------Conclusions--------------------------------

To summarise, I understand the complaints surrounding this book, and I agree it could've been better, but it was already incredibly emotionally in tune, and that was what kept me reading.

♥♥♥

-Gaia

(I'm slightly concerned this series is about to become my new personality.)

⚠Content Warnings⚠

-Mild language

-Violence (Rarely graphic)

[mlemedt]

Fake Dates & Mooncakes- Sher Lee

💛💛💛���🤍 (3/5)

I was first recommended this book in Waterstones Pride Collection, so I suppose I'm a bit late reading this. I'm usually up for anything Pride since the representation is just heartwarming, and encouraging the normalisation of marginalised groups is always a plus.

🥮

The novel follows the perspective of Dylan Tang, a 16 year-old helping out with his Aunts small takeout, and his romantic exploits with Theo Somers. However, it did very much feel like I was simply following him. Dylan was one of those characters were things sort of just happen to them, rather than him making active decisions. This wasn't the case all the time, it was just quite noticeable after coming off 'The Virgin Suicides' where the entire story is an active decision. It wasn't a huge problem but it stunted Lee's ability to show off his personality, so at times I wasn't entirely sure what his aspirations were.

---------------------------------Commentary------------------------------

I felt, surprisingly, there wasn't actually much commentary within this novel, which, as I said in my review of 'Psyche & Eros,' is not always a bad thing. A novel can simply entertain you and in this case warm you up a bit. I was just expecting at least some discussion on their sexuality and perhaps how that has impacted them, especially Theo being a part of such a high profile family, but alas there was not. I read 'Red White & Royal Blue' last year, which was fun and warming, but still had, granted a small discussion of how scary it can be to come out and be perceived fully, especially in high profile positions. It's an interesting decision to write a romance like this, and that not be a discussion point. It just would've added an extra layer, and also help make the characters feel more real. However, I suppose Lee may prefer passive representation, which is just as valid. Simply having more gay characters out there can do a lot for the publishing industry and society's perception of them too.

However, I loved Lee's exploration into Chinese and Singaporean culture and what it's like to be mixed race, in a home away from home. I honestly wasn't expecting it but I can tell a lot of effort went into bringing Lee's culture to life. Furthermore, the detail of writing in the cooking scenes, actually made me hungry, and could encourage anyone to go out an try a new dish.

🥮

-----------------------------------Criticisms--------------------------------

I feel horrible critiquing a book like this because it was genuinely soothing and fun to read, but however at times it didn't read fantastically. For instance the two hit a major bump in their relationship, but their confrontation only lasts around a page, before they suddenly realised what has actually happened. The pacing was just a bit funny at times, the chapter begins with a major point but it sizzles out by the next page. Some instances also had quite unbelievable characters. I hate to make this comparison, but at points it felt like a Wattpad.

To be fair, I wasn't looking for anything high profile and it did it's job making me happy for them and bringing a smile to my soul. Anyway, I can't comment on the quality of writing when I am not a writer myself, I'm just noting some observations. Perhaps others felt different.

🥮

----------------------------------Conclusions------------------------------

This is one of my shorter reviews apparently, because it was simply fun to read and I don't have much to complain about. Perhaps not perfectly executed regarding character and literary detail, but fun nevertheless. And anyway, no piece of writing can be perfect anyway.

♥♥♥

-Gaia

⚠Content Warnings⚠

-Mild and Infrequent swearing

[mlemedt]

🌷Virgo🌷

-The Maiden-

Here’s a more tidied up version and a brief history of my zodiac project. It’s crazy to see how much I’ve improved over the years, and I hope I can continue to do that. I didn’t do this last year as a result of exams, which is why I think it feels more important this time.

It’s really scary posting art. I try to remind myself on the numerous occasions I’ve tried to put it out there that it’s all subjective, but art’s deeply personal and can make you feel really vulnerable. If just one person doesn’t like it, you feel like you’ve failed.

Anyway, as I mentioned here are my previous interpretations and the Bloom Dress inspo and sketch.

🌷🌷🌷

[mlemedt]

The Virgin Suicides- Jeffrey Eugenides

[Minor Spoilers]

TW: As the title suggests, here I will be discussing suicide, if you struggle with mental health, perhaps give this a miss.

As I mentioned previously, so far my reviews have all been by female authors. Well, this change ought to have been refreshing, but unfortunately the difference was noticeable. Also I’d quickly like to note the book I have lined up next and have begun reading as I write this, is much lighter. I am on holiday after all, and there’s only so much teenage suicide one can read in a week. It was hardly intentional. I was debating between this and ‘Lolita,’ but landed on Eugenides simply because it was smaller and I’m currently travelling.

🍃

---------------------------------Discussion---------------------------------

Similarly with ‘Welcome to the Hyunam-Dong Bookshop’ I’ve had this review in my drafts for quite a while, (over a week!) simply because I don’t have much to say. To be honest, I was disappointed. The novel starts impactfully with the reader immediately understanding all 5 of the Lisbon girls kill themselves. However the quality quickly begins to decline. It’s unclear the circumstances of narration, and only properly addressed in the very last pages. What little you do learn, is that it's a record of perspectives from the neighbourhood boys, now grown up and looking back. (Although this is seldom made note of.) However at times it seems to present itself as an investigation, with scenarios and objects referred to as 'Exhibit#.' We learn later these are items of the sisters, collected by the boys into 5 different suitcases, one for each girl. (The novel makes you consider this is an amateur investigation, but the narrator quickly interrupts this thought, stating clearly it is not, that they've already interviewed everyone they could to no avail. It's rather a record of what they do know.)

🍃

I read a couple of other reviews before this as I scrambled for meaning in this book and found two particular reviews that have puzzled me since, ‘I truly felt like one of the neighbourhood boys talking about the Lisbon sisters’ and ‘flare from my own secret world, all the inchoate longings and obsessions of being a teenager.’ The boys, perhaps, were not intended to be reliable narrators and are meant to leave you with questions, but I found it quite unsatisfying. I don’t understand how this extent of obsession can be relatable. Five suitcases with items labelled, and with detailed stories attached, for girls these boys could barely tell apart, and for the most part had little to do with- it just doesn't make sense to me. It would’ve been more understandable if the narrators simply had some depth or described some reason for obsession, but they are utterly vapid. I suppose infatuation has little logic, but the novel doesn't even read like this, just simple observation with little emotion attached. Dry, it was completely dry. I simply can't fathom, why an event of such magnitude, especially in its contemporary, could not warrant a drop of emotion. I suppose grief impacts people differently, but this level was simply robotic.

Simply put, with such a provocative conceit you would imagine Eugenides to explore the reasonings of such tragic teenage suicides, but it ultimately remains a mystery. The lack of emotional perception from the narrators is just tiring. It was sad how something so powerful could make me so bored.

🍃

Additionally, the many uninteresting tangents that had little to do with the main plot were suffocating. It felt like a whole chapter was dedicated to the daily musings of an old Greek neighbour, as put concisely in one of the other reviews I read; ‘I struggled to get through it and how much it diverged from the plot and went on seemingly insignificant tangents.’ However, it could hardly have been a chapter, since Eugenides thought a quarter of the book was appropriate for his fifth (and final chapter, I may note,) in which the other four suicides take place. As I said, the first chapter was interesting, enticing us with a seemingly impossible tragedy, and then fully exploring the first Lisbon's suicide. How, 240 pages can be divided into just five chapters baffles me, with two dedicated to just one suicide. (These two were also comically shorter than the other chapters.) The entire story occurs within those first two chapters and about twenty pages in the final chapter when the joint suicides take place. The pacing was simply awful.

🍃

Upon the notes on emotional perception, ultimately I felt I learnt little about the Lisbon girls. Small details dropped throughout the book help create a picture of the personalities and aspirations, but there is little on what caused the turn to suicide, which is what I would've expected the focus to be upon.

Detailing this now, I suppose the novel was meant to be a record of teenagedom, but even so, poorly realised characters still create a dry and emotionless book. I should elaborate on 'poorly realised' for my final note: the 'male gaze'.

This certainly felt like an instance of 'men writing women.' The narrators make note upon ‘brassieres hung upon crucifixes,’ ‘their plump bottoms,’ ‘Cecilia’s unformed chest.' It seems bizarre, but this imagery and these comments, just stuck with me for how uncomfortable they made, and how awkward it was to read. The boys are describing the attempted suicide of a thirteen-year-old, and yet they make note of her body and intimate items from around her bedroom. I understand how the 'excitement,' for lack of a better word, of the introduction to this other world, will make such details noticeable, but is it truly necessary when discussing the youngest sister? The 13 year-old? I just felt the focus was all wrong. Even if it was a record of teenagedom, which it does seem to be, why are the suicides necessary? I think most teenagers struggle with mental health, if not all, yet apparently our narrators don't. The suicides of the girls do not call upon questions of their own mortality, or seem to have much profound impact at all, except they are still reminiscing upon it years later for its mystery of all.

Finally, there's the characterisation of Lux. The 14 year-old sexual deviant. I'd say the majority of the book discusses Lux (and earlier Cecilia, then she is little mentioned), with only a few mentions of Bonnie, Therese and Mary. There is a small discussion on the decline of Lux's mental health, but is hardly explored, as after all, our narrators are unreliable. However, the narrators do explore Lux's love-life, in quite some depth. (This is why I'm lead to believe it's a record of adolescence, with such a great focus on intimacy- the novel certainly seems as though the girls were only interesting for their visual quality.)

🍃

----------------------------------Conclusions------------------------------

As I'm discussing this, underlying meanings are perhaps becoming clearer, which ought to add to the quality of the book, but the primary experience of reading it just didn't spark much in me. It seems insane that I wasn't moved to emotion much at all, when discussing the suicides of 5 teenage girls, much the same as myself. It's this that is confusing me so much. Was the focus the suicides or the virgins?

Its greatly interesting that the top two reviews on the Waterstones site I've linked below are 4 and then 1 star, yet I agree with both. I think the lack of answers and characterisation is undoubtedly purposeful, trying to lure you to contemplate the themes of the book, and also discuss the dark nature of the male gaze.

🍃

I would be greatly interested in any discussion on the role of the novel, and for this lingering contemplation I will avoid ranking 'The Virgin Suicides' low. The quality of literature, at least for me, is a fine balance of 'What is the author trying to tell me?' and how well they tell me.

I understand both the high and low reviews now, and there certainly is a discussion to be had on the purpose of this book, but ultimately I did not enjoy it when I read it. But I'm enjoying discussing it. I think sometimes these can be the best books, the ones you don't like, but have some supernatural ability to make you continue questioning it, until you feel you've unearthed all it's purposes and references and details and devices.

For this reason I cant rate 'The Virgin Suicides.'

♥♥♥

-Gaia

⚠Content Warnings⚠

-Suicide (not just discussion, includes graphic description that could be distressing)

-Sexual themes

-Infrequent swearing

[mlemedt]

🌺Virgo🌺

I didn’t actually think I’d get round to posting any art but I suddenly had an urge after buying a cute new palette. I was sketching this girly all summer and it’s so satisfying to see her realised in colour (although I really hate the wings!)

I’ve done a zodiac series just about every summer for at least 5 years now and thought I should probably get round to it. Originally I took inspiration from personalities associated, but with every source they’re different, so it’s mostly inspired by ✨vibes ✨

Here, I took lots of inspiration from the 'Bloom Dress' (Miss Sohee Courture- absolutely obsessed) and my previous interpretations of this sign and tried to weave them all together, whilst integrating my new style. In the past I've imagined Virgo as a kind of mother Earth figure, which slowly evolved into her becoming the Earth, and now I guess she's breaking out and telling everyone she's here!

🌸🌸🌸

A/N

-Im not entirely sure if I'm committing to paint the rest of the zodiacs yet. I've not painted for a while so I'm just seeing where inspiration takes me. If I do end up motivated to make this a series I'll get more of a format for this, and probably will discuss the process here instead. I hope you like her!

[mlemedt]

The Bell Jar- Sylvia Plath

💛💛💛💛🤍 (4/5)

—————————————Introduction——————————————-

It feels bizarre to sit here and type my comments for such an incredible piece of literature. I’ve always considered it strange to critique classics, when they’re held on a pedestal so high above any other book. As if im simply not worthy to propose an opinion. It’s actually quite daunting to consider, to the extent this introduction is perhaps much harder than any other.

🍼

Although every review so far has been by a female author, these are perhaps rather the exception. To be transparent most of the books sat upon my bookcase are classics, all written by men with the exception of Jane Austen and Sylvia Plath. I’ve considered this before which is perhaps why I’m exploring new genres in this summer ambition. Many of the books I have lined up for review are books that make me excited and I’ve bought recently. These are female dominated. Perhaps recently I’ve been more drawn toward female focused literature because as Hwang advised in my previous review, that you ought to resonate with what you read.

I will be honest, previously I read a lot of Dostoevsky and Camus, and I still have some of their books on my shelf left to read. I enjoyed them because they made my brain turn, they made me think about the world and what it is to be alive. But sometimes I’d put down their work feeling hollow. I suppose this is the nature of existentialism, but actually, my main issue was that I didn’t feel a part of the story. As much as I understood the characters, I didn’t connect with them. And I think that’s because their authors don’t know who I am. These frankly male dominated books, in character and thought, are stifling. They feel grey and unalive. (However that’s not to say they don’t have incredible meaning.)

The Bell Jar was one of those books where the characters come alive between the lines and beyond the page. When you feel you’re no longer reading words, but dreaming of another world. There’s no greater satisfaction than a character so well realised and characterised that you can see their motions and movements between lines.

🍼

-----------------------------—Commentary—------------------------------

One could argue that, the main theme of this book is its exploration into the dark and harrowing corners of the human psyche, but this cannot be observed without its stimulant. The suffocating role of women and gender expectations in the 1950s. The two cannot be considered without the other.

When I read these pages I understood Esther, I could share her pain and feel her suffocating as if it was the air around myself that had become stale. Then I would put the book down and carry on with my day, I’d think of Plath, and the realness Esther holds. I can’t pretend to understand the extent of Plath’s suffering, but the vividness in which she portrayed her mental health, created a hollowness in my heart, unlike any of the existentialists could ever. To be trapped in the pages of someone else’s torment, to feel yourself suffocating with them, feeling your limbs go weak as they try to drown themselves, it sparks real human compassion and solidarity, and paints clear the constraining experience women have faced for centuries.

🍼

As I’ve said, reading is a way to enrich oneself and understand not just the experience of others, but to further understand yourself. Perhaps, I have not quite yet understood the impact Plath has had on me yet. Unlike other reviews where I’ve taken a couple of days to compile my thoughts, I have just an hour ago from writing this finished ‘The Bell Jar.’ I think that speaks volumes as to how impactful it was.

I don’t feel it necessary to follow my usual format in these reviews, I think you only need to read just one paragraph of this to understand how I feel about this book. And I don’t think it’s necessary to discuss how well realised her image of mental health was, and how that made me feel, and then reflect upon my own experiences. Perhaps I did not cry, but perhaps that was because her experience was not lyrical but realistic.

🍼

——————————————Conclusion——————————————-

I’ll leave you with one final note. The title. I contemplated for a while, why Plath had called it this, there was little mention until the end of the novel, when it finally began to make sense. ‘Bell jars are often used in laboratories to form and contain a vacuum.’ The specimens inside are meant to be preserved for observation. Imagine you are inside one. There is no air, your lungs are constantly screaming for breath, your throat dry and starved, itching for a taste of air. Despite your tormented state, you remain motionless and cold, with a rod here or there to prop you up, and make sure you look pretty and observable. Whilst you suffocate, you must maintain appearance for the many eyes upon you. All whilst you claw for oxygen, bodies circle, and eyes watch. They are inflated and disgustingly huge as they are bent by the glass. The wall maintains between you and the world, and you feel you will never escape. That’s the image Plath painted for me. Perhaps my metaphor isn’t entirely correct, after all I’m quite sure most of the specimens in laboratories aren’t usually alive, and are rather propped to be observed rather than look presentable, but I digress.

It seems cruel to conclude that my favourite part was the ending, but it left me with hope. Hope that we can escape the Bell Jar.

♥♥♥

-Gaia

⚠️ Content Warnings ⚠️

This book is of its time and infrequently uses racist terminology. The protagonist also refers to lesbianism as ‘disgusting,’ however this constitutes only about a page of discussion.

-Sexual themes (discussive rather than descriptive)

-Heavy suicide theme (Protagonist tries to take her own life many times and thinks of it often. Other characters also commit suicide. If you struggle with mental health, I would heavily caution you.)

[mlemedt]

Welcome to the Hyunam-Dong Bookshop- Hwang Bo Reum

💛💛💛🤍🤍 (3/5)

——————————Summary & Introduction———————————

Welcome to the Hyunam-Dong Bookshop, has been one of the most academically intriguing book thus far. There is no story as such, but rather follows the daily life of Yeongju, the owner of the titular bookshop. This novel has no epic plots or incredible romances, yet still maintains an incredibly evocative narrative, however I’ve found this novel has had little lasting impact.

🩷

——————————————Discussion—————————————

Whilst one might consider there wasn’t much to this novel, it was a realistic depiction of life and I enjoyed the individual stories of the regular visitors to the bookshop. It was grounded in reality and an enjoyable change from the mythological retellings I’m often embroiled in. There was interesting discussions about society and capitalism and the strain of work that are certainly worth noting.

🩷

For me the most interesting discussion was ‘What does it mean to have a successful life?’ For one character in particular this was good grades, a good university and a good job. Perhaps this was the most interesting to me as I find myself on a similar train of thought. Hwang explores the strain of corporate grind and how success is individual and can be simplify defined as contentment. Another interesting theme was Hwangs exploration of literature, and what it means to read.

My biggest take-away from this book was advice to read how you feel. If you hate your job, read about someone hating theirs. If you’re feeling depressed read about someone else feeling that too. But it’s not as simple as it seems. I’ve found I don’t look towards these characters for solutions but rather resonance. When you can see your own thoughts and feelings projected upon another character, everything becomes clearer. You don’t necessarily look to the book in search of a conclusion but to understand yourself. In this ambition to read so many books this summer, in the few I have read so far I have understood more about myself from each. I believe it was ‘Orphia & Eurydicius’ that said something along the lines of ‘stories are continued within the lives of the listener.’ I’m sure I’ve heard something similar before, but taking time to discuss the value of literature and why we read, is something I hadn’t yet done, which seems bizarre, since I now have a blog dedicated to my reading exploits.

🩷

Whilst these themes provoked exploration into the working culture we live in, I will be honest that I am writing this as I almost finish my next book. Ive not been that inspired to record what I think, because truthfully, I don’t think I thought much of it. Perhaps I was not the audience for this book. I can sit here and tell you the discussions were interesting but they were really quite tepid. I think Hwang could’ve gone further.

I intend to make note to read this again in the future, perhaps when its themes have more prominence within my own life. After all many of the focal characters were around thirty contemplating dead-end jobs, whilst I’ve barely begun my exploration into the workplace.

🩷

——————————————Conclusion——————————————-

To be brutally honest, I was just a little bored reading this, maybe a little curious, but hardly invested. But my interest is hardly indicative of great literature. I think I simply wasn’t the audience for this, I couldn’t relate to the characters due to my lack of experience, and that created a disconnect between me and Hwang. However, with regards to a rating, I did not actively dislike reading her pages so it would appear logical to report a 3/5. But this is my issue. I think I need to increase my ratings to out of 10. I gave ‘Psyche & Eros’ 3/5 and it has pretty much haunted me since. It didn’t feel right to give 4/5 but I really enjoyed it, much more than ‘Orphia & Eurydicius’ which I gave the higher rating. My experience with ‘Welcome to the Hyunam-Dong Bookshop’ and ‘Psyche & Eros’ couldn’t be more different yet they might share the same rating? Then should this particular book be 2/5? This seems to low, but it appears it must be.

I will make sure to update this system, and note the new ratings under my old posts, but I will leave the reviews themselves as they are. I think I struggle to rate a book low because I try to find value in everything, and I’m certain many others that can actually relate to the characters will find lots of value in WTHDB. This is where I have to remind myself these reviews are subjective.

I’ve concluded, it must be 3/5 but I will also note a new score out of ten below once I’ve come up with a fairer system. This is simply because I didn’t enjoy it much but felt its discussions had much value and relevance in contemporary society.

♥♥♥

-Gaia

⚠️ Content Warnings ⚠️

-Mild + Infrequent swearing

[mlemedt]

Orphia & Eurydicius- Elyse John

💛💛💛💛🤍 (4/5)

——————————Summary & Introduction———————————

I’ve had this particular review on my to-do list for a few days now, but I’ve finally decided it simply won’t write itself, and the best way to come up with words is to just begin with one.

Orphia & Eurydicius loosely follows the original tale but with one major change. Orpheus has become Orphia, muscled heroine and warrior poet, and Eurydice, Eurydicius, the gentle shield maker. I did appreciate how this character now felt much more complete. Despite having studied this very myth in school I could not tell you much about Virgil’s original character. Eurydice was not a great focus of the myth, perhaps as it was passed down her part got lost.

💧

—————————Commentary & Criticisms————————————

Much emphasis was placed on this gender bend, as Orphia maintained the more masculine attributes of Greek Heroes and Eurydicius, remained rather meek. Much of the novel explored their sexuality and, I believe, tries to destigmatise women taking a more dominant role in relationships. Whilst it appears ridiculous to say, I think John took this too far, to the point Orphia had little other personality. Eurydicius, whilst indeed not the protagonist did not feel entirely complete as well. A huge theme in this novel was female empowerment, but again, I just don’t think it was executed well. Whilst it is indeed an important conversation, it felt every other paragraph Orphia had something to say about her sex. Whilst this is fine, much of her questioning didn’t make all that much sense. There’s a particular scene with Orphia in the hall of the Gods and it is pointed out that many Goddesses are absent. We find out it is because Zeus sent them on separate missions because he was afraid of them uniting against him. Whilst John is trying to convey women are stronger together than divided, it simply didn’t read well, as Zeus is also portrayed to look down upon women (This is indeed quite accurate.) It simply doesn’t make sense that he would be afraid of the Goddesses if he thought himself better and more powerful. It’s entirely possible, I’ve misinterpreted something, but much of the reasoning behind women’s backseat role in society in this novel, is because men are afraid of their power? I just think the attention was in the wrong place. Little was discussed about the actual reasons of women’s minor role in the Ancient World which I think would’ve provided a much more stimulating argument.

(It very much projected issues and arguments of today into a world of the past, where this sort of commentary just didn't fit well.)

This, I think was another incidence of telling and not showing, and it was just tiring.

💧

Furthermore, another issue I had was the characterisation of Orphia. I discussed briefly in ‘Psyche & Eros’ how Psyche had fallen into the trope of ‘Strong Female Characters,’ but if Psyche fell then Orphia was drowning in it. Whilst I certainly have no qualms with Orphia being muscled, independent and just more dominant, there was actually little else to her. Despite being written in her perspective, I learnt little about her in 380 pages, other than her desire for equality.

I had a similar problem with Eurydicius also. Whilst it makes sense he’s not quite as fleshed out as the protagonist there was just little to him overall. Additionally, there was little sustenance to their love story, which, in a book titled by its two lovers, I would’ve thought important.

💧

My final note is Johns writing style. Whilst absolutely beautiful, I felt I was sometimes getting lost in the words. Perhaps this is just me, but I remember a particular scene where John describes ‘an orb above the ocean’ and it took me a minute to realise she was talking about the moon. I wouldn’t usually comment on something like this as it’s quite subjective but I felt it happened a lot in this novel. It was almost excessively poetic to the point it was tiring. However, her lyrical and descriptive style really lent itself in the latter half of the novel.

💧

———————————————Praise————————————————

Whilst I certainly had a slow start to this book, and struggled from chapter to chapter initially, Johns writing style truly comes into bloom in the latter half of the book. Once the story gets going it is certainly enjoyable and I had in my mind that it certainly could no longer only be 2/5. And this is my dilemma. I didn’t think that I could rate a book so tactless about feminism 4/5 but a book that made me cry and brought me such a surge of emotion couldn’t possibly be anything less. (Perhaps tact is not the right word here, feminism doesn’t need tact, but rather its implementation was just abrupt and awkward to read.) Whilst I did not think highly of Johns writing at first, she truly proves her skill when it comes to writing grief. I will be completely honest, that I could not stop crying for the last 100 pages. Thinking about turning each page made my stomach churn. Thinking about writing this review makes my stomach churn. A writer as powerful as that ought to be deserved 4/5 stars. Her lyrical style is certainly pleasant but is entirely overwhelming in those last few chapters. The aches and pains described I could feel in myself, and I felt that John truly knew what it was to lose someone. As a result of this, I’ve listed some of my favourite quotes throughout this review.

“A story is a legacy, more than gold or marble can ever be. A story gives and gives. It creates new tales and poems and songs, and its children heave with birthing pains of art.”

💧

—————————————Conclusions———————————————

To conclude, I had quite the tumultuous relationship with this novel, but Johns skill and lyrical mastery of words truly created a most powerful novel, that brought me to tears, and does not deserve anything less than a 4/5. But I do believe perhaps characters could’ve been crafted more intentionally as they lacked a little intrigue, but the ability to evoke such emotion cannot be understated. I encourage you to also read this and would be curious to know if you also felt such a range of emotions toward this novel.

”For in hearing a story we bind it to ourselves. We understand it in a way that is real to us, like a sunrise inking the sky with pale pink outside our window, presented for only us to see.”

💧

“The story of Orphia & Eurydicius flows from ear to ear and as mortals absorb it, they learn not only what it is to die, but also what it is to be fully alive.”

💧

“Desperate people who hear the tale begin to nourish hope that they will find love: a bond so fairly balanced that the pain of life will be worth it, and their joy will weigh evenly against the agony of their grief."

💧

“If I must die, I would live first.

💧

♥♥♥

-Gaia

⚠️ Content Warnings ⚠️

-Minor sexual themes

-Discussions of rape

[mlemedt]

In Memoriam- Alice Winn

💛💛💛💛💛 (5/5)

--------------------------------Introduction-------------------------------

I find I struggle the most when it comes to introducing anything, really. Do I start with a short summary of my experience, or the book? I can never think of an appropriate way to begin. So I shall begin simply.

In Memoriam was a much needed reminder of the innate cruelty of human hands and yet also their fragility and wondrous ability to love so kindly and deeply. A truly complex and intricate understanding of the fabric of people. There is no right and wrong at the Front, there is no time to consider the nature of violence, what it means to take another's life, why this war is worth fighting. There is simply survival in the will of love. When there was no one left to love, there was no longer a reason to fight, no reason to burn, no hope for a better future for the future had drowned before them in that sea of mud.

🥀

Certainly in Ellwoods experience, his passion and patriotism to protect his home fade once his true home, his belonging and future, Gaunt disappears. For home no longer exists. I truly found Winn's work completely empathetic with the intricate emotions of a soldier. How a passion can burn so bright and fade so quick, only to be replaced with unconscionable anger. I felt connected to the characters and their emotional journeys, which were utterly convincing, and truly heartbreaking seeing them change so completely. Gaunt and Ellwood's relationship was difficult and often times unsatisfying, but this messiness just made it so compelling and relatable. It certainly wasn't smooth and safe like that love portrayed in Psyche & Eros, but this love endured four torturous years of violence and incomparable change. At no point did I feel certain and safe that Winns debut novel would end happily, and I think that truly encompasses the uncertainty of life that was felt on the Front by so many people, so long ago.

🥀

--------------------------------Commentary-------------------------------

I truly had no queries after finishing this book like Psyche & Eros, I hold only praise and am reminded of our need to respect life and love. When I looked up from the pages of gore and mud to be safe in my own garden with the sun beating down and the flowers and trees still standing tall and green, I felt I could see properly again, and truly appreciate the beauty and privilege that I experience. However, it also made Winn's story much more powerful. Scenes flick between Gaunt and Ellwood's time at boarding school and their time at the Front. The startling contrast is simply that. Startling. A reminder of how quickly life can change.

🥀

I also think it's important to read war novels. It's a private way to relate to the suffering of others, and certainly brings a humanity to war that a classroom will fail to teach. Winn's description of horror was utterly inelegant, for there is nothing elegant about war. The casual way mutilation was described brought me back to the work of Erich Maria Remarque. This startling method of conveying violence is certainly effective, it brushes away any disillusionment and demonstrates the attitudes men needed to have in order to survive. We can look down on those who can forget those sights they've seen, but it is basic survival, and when you simply cannot cope you must do what you must.

I found some of the commentary within Winns novel rather provoking. It mentions that dying is just a statistic. There is no way to better your chances. You just have to hope you're not one of the 20%. This lack of control was utterly powerful.

🥀

-------------------------Conclusions + Praise-----------------------------

I truly believe everyone should read this. I will also note that at this point, I had not made my mind up on the rating. I feel it goes beyond category, but for simplicity (which this novel certainly is not) I will indeed. It feels almost wrong for only my second review to claim five stars, but if I had read this at any point in my life, my rating would remain the same. A truly intimate and emotional insight into the brutality of war. There are many more things I could say. It's difficult to summarise such incredible and thoughtful work so I will leave you with this short summary-

"Tracing the love story between two WWI soldiers, In Memoriam is a luminous, heartbreaking meditation on the tragedies of war and the precious sanctuary that can be found in deep human connection"

♥♥♥

-Gaia

⚠ Content Warnings⚠

-Violence and Graphic Detail

-Mild Swearing

-Sexual Themes

[mlemedt]

Psyche & Eros- Luna McNamara

[Minor Spoilers]

💛💛💛🤍🤍 (3/5)

---------------------------Summary + Introduction-----------------------

This was the first book I've read this summer. I found it on display in the YA section of my local bookshop on my lunchbreak. What prompted me to buy and read it within days was my love for their story. One of the few Greek Myths that ends happily and I cant get enough of a good love story. (Tragedies are overrated.) The story follows the two protagonists with chapters alternating perspective and loosely adapts the plot of the original myth. It certainly wasn't a highbrow read that questioned society and had much underlying commentary, but served its purpose well in being a tool for entertainment. I'd also like to add I read this on my lunchbreaks everyday and provided a beautiful escape from reality. (Certainly an important purpose of books.)

🏹

-----------------------------Commentary---------------------------------

I will admit I most enjoyed McNamaras easy collaboration of myths, and appreciated her attention to the role of women in Ancient Greek Myths. I also thought it was a nice detail Psyche embarks on most of her journey pregnant, which not only added to the strength of her character but reiterates the general strength of women. It should be acknowledged that this is a retelling and Psyches character was quite refreshing, but however fell in with much modern characterisation of 'girlbosses,' but it seems McNamara acknowledges this and has Psyche evaluate herself on her journey, whilst not much attention was drawn to this I definitely appreciated it.

🏹

-------------------------------Criticisms-----------------------------------

Overall it was an enjoyable story with enough truth to key points of the myth but with McNamaras own interesting interpretations, however I did feel in some areas the characters lacked depth and meaningful response. My main issue was when they are finally reunited, Psyche has died twice and Eros has almost lost his divinity to get to this point, yet their reunion lacked much emotion. Also I felt Psyche lacked much response to Eros' true form, she'd never seen it before and her longing for a glimpse is what drove them apart in the first place. It was also a great anxiety for Eros but it was just brushed over in their reunion. So I didn't quite understand why this major plot point got lost at what should've been its climax. I suppose it could be that appearance was not a major worry for Psyche at this point and she simply just longed to be with him, but there was no sense of this on her journey.

Another small detail that annoyed me was how quickly Psyche brushes over her first kill. Psyche certainly enjoyed killing monsters but did not hesitate when it came to people. Although they were bandits and it could be argued she wanted to protect her lover, it certainly didn't appear this way. It was more fighting for the sake of it. Whilst certainly a hobby, I would've expected Psyche to question the morality of taking another life. Whilst it may not be the book for that she certainly questions taking the lives of Griffins later in the story. Whilst the reasoning's were different, I did feel there was some inconsistencies with her attitudes to fighting. (Of course she develops as a character, but she does not necessarily question her actions to a high degree in the way that would be fitting for a person that is looking back upon it.)

🏹

The final detail that I questioned slightly was the decision to write in past and first person. Psyche and Eros are looking back on their life but they do not add much commentary of what they've learnt, which is what I typically expect from books written in this format. (Although they certainly do this in the Prologue.) Furthermore, it makes the lack of questioning more pertinent. Obviously it was enjoyable to see the emotions and inner workings of both characters (I think this is very important in love stories) but I felt initially this could've been more smoothly achieved with a more narrative style.

🏹

-------------------------Conclusions + Praise-----------------------------

But let not these small details take away from the fact I thoroughly enjoyed the story McNamara crafted and is certainly a good read if you're interested in mythology and a satisfying love story. I should also add that 3/5 stars is certainly not a bad rating. I intend to reserve the upper echelons for books beautifully crafted with intense and evocative language and consistent and provocative meanings. But as I said, not every book intends to be world changing, most of the time they are the result of passion on the authors end, and I can say with certainty I enjoyed McNamaras labour of love. Books that can be enjoyed just for content are just as valid as high regarded classics.

🏹

If anyone has read 'Psyche and Eros' I'd be interested to know what you thought, and i'd just like to reiterate that I enjoyed reading it.

♥♥♥

-Gaia

⚠Content Warnings⚠

-Minor sexual themes

-Discussions of rape

-Moderate swearing