dorciham

[dorciham]

He who cannot, teaches #1

Person leading the practical for microscopic botany:

Please sign here that you perform the practical tasks at your own risk. And do not eat the samples. Don't. Someone treated everything as a snack once, and developed a taste for castor seeds. The guy lived to tell the tale, but kids, there are many friendlier ways to die. And you'll be teachers in the future. So keep an eye out, because the information that "children stop trying to orally analyze every object in their reach by the age of 6" is an urban legend.

[dorciham]

hamham - my sister making me feel physical pain while studying #2

dear medical professionals no, running doesn't "shake the bad methyl-groups off of your dna" i'm sorry, that is just not how genetics work or chemistry, or physics, or anything please stop teaching this to people thank you

[dorciham]

hamham - my sister making me feel physical pain while studying #1

dorci, the poor sod, has been studying for like 14 hours straight today, trying to get the process of protein synthesis summarized in a paper

she asked me to have a look at it and try to find any mistakes she might've made her first sentence can most accurately be translated from hungarian as follows: "the translation does require does ribosomes"

...i appreciated the attempt, but told her she might want to get some sleep and take a look through that again

[dorciham]

Dorci - Art #1

Sooooo, last night I wasn't in the mood for studying molecular cell biology, so instead, after a year, I reignited one of my former passions. I know everyone here is a terrific artist, and I'd love to be only half as talented as any of them one day, but I'm sharing this regardless. ^^"

[dorciham]

hamham - making my sister feel physical pain while studying #1

so dorci just asked me why she has to study kuru for biology 10 minutes of explaining later, after touching on mad cow disease, brains, pork rinds, and how gummy bears are made, i think i've accidentally made her vegan

[dorciham]

Dorci - Chemistry tutoring #1

12 hours before a chemistry exam: Friend: "What is the Pauli exclusion principle and Hund's rule?" Me: "They're both rules about electrons. Electrons always position themselves on subshells in a way that makes as many of them unpaired as possible, with the same spin at first, because that gives them the minimum energy possible." "...?" "Then another electron gets paired to them with the opposite spin." "?" "So. Hund's rule: people on buses don't sit down next to eachother, only if there are no empty pairs of seats left. Electrons work the same way. In the case of Pauli, electrons dance around the nucleus. Ladies first, who have the same spin, but there's a dress code, so if they run out of clothes to rent, no more girls can go in, then come the guys. Everyone in chemistry is hetero, so girls only pair up with guys, meaning pairs only form with electrons of opposite spins." "Okay if I explain it like that, they'll think I'm mental." (2 out of 10 questions were related to this, my friend got a 3 on a 5-grade scale (I believe the metaphorical version would've been an instant 5, but whatever))

[dorciham]

hamham - night shift at the medical centre #1

"well, if you have to go pull a night shift, i guess we have to get going"

[dorciham]

Dorci - Exam #1

Experience from yesterday: Prof: "Okay, I'm not interested in pointless chatter, I don't care whether you can tell me the entire process of protein synthesis or the difference between TFII-D and TFII-E. Let's see how detailed your knowledge is: how wide is a strand of DNA?" Me, after going through 300 pages a day, dozens of explaining videos and sleeping 2 hours several times to understand the process of replication, negligently skimming through the exact value of DNA's width (especially since the exam requirements did not mention this): "1 pm?..." Prof: "Sadly, no, but no worries, you will know the answer next time, right?" *smiles* Me: *smiles* 💀

[dorciham]

Dorci - Making my brother feel physical pain while studying #1

Ham: "Uh, your professor made a mistake here. Said "glycolysation" happens to proteins instead of "glycosylation"." Me: "What's the difference?" "They're pretty much the opposites of eachother. Glycosylation is attaching a sugar to something, glycolysis is breaking down a sugar." "So the sugar's breaking down here, and he just misspelled it." "No, it is being built in, and he misspelled that. Glycosylation, not glycolysation." "Pff, I just heard the same exact word twice." "Huh... the point is sugar is being attached here." "So glycolysation." "Switch the l and s." "Gsico... ly..." "...You know what, they probably won't ask this during the exam anyway."

[dorciham]

hamham - medical studies vs reality #1

ok so since covid i've kinda started drinking (i mean with covid being what it was, can anyone really blame me for that?) (also you betcha i will rant about the stuff i had to do during covid in a while, when i figure out how to make it not depressing)

and it's led to fun stuff when studying, particularly biochemistry like "mm yes, so alcohol destroys your liver by being turned into acetaldehyde" *sips from glass of wine* "if you drink enough it opens the cyp2e1 pathway to make it break down even faster" *sip* "oh and if you take certain cold medicines with alcohol that pathway will just straight up murder you" *siiiiiiiiiiiiiiip*

[dorciham]

Dorci - The hardships of heart disorders #1 - School

Since my ailment (Tetralogy of Fallot - TOF) isn't very common, those in my vicinity have always been pretty terrified by my presence. Thankfully, my disease doesn't have any particular signs (no food allergies, diabetes, mental effects, etc.), I just have a couple of plastic stuff inside which don't let me exert myself much. I have to emphasize that every classmate and teacher of mine, past and present, have tried their best to deal with me, but some interesting results were reached:

- after I talked about my disease in class, some started to talk to me loudly, articulating and gesticulating as much as possible - I was then also asked whether the plastic blood vessels bother me when I swallow - my seatmate: "Is your disease infectious?" (I've fortunately calmed them down and told them no, touching me won't turn half of your pulmonary circulation into plastic) - my teacher allowed me to measure my blood sugar during lessons whenever I wanted, I didn't have to go out of the classroom (I haven't measured my blood sugar before or since) - someone's mom wanted to make me purge after she realized the gave me a pancake which contained xylitol - I probably hold the Guinness World Record for being on the receiving end of idioms like "you have a heart of gold", "you'll make someone eat their heart out" etc. - one of my teachers brought me a sick bag for every class trip due to my motion sickness (which I didn't know I had) and made me sit behind the bus driver at the window at all times - when I had heart palpitations, our director offered me pálinka (a sort of fruit spirit which is 37.5% abv at least)