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Part 3 of Batman the Playboy, in which I change my mind about the reveal in part 2:

Batman: “So you didn’t notice?”

-justice league record scratches-

GL, horrified: “No. there’s no way, there’s absolutely no way…”

Batman’s grin would fit better on a supervillain, before he suddenly, miraculously, transforms. He leans back, tilts his head, the smirk isn’t evil but instead inviting and amused: “Really, Mr. Jordan, your job is just so fascinating… tell me more about planes…”

GL: 😨

Batman, turning on the rest of the league, one by one, changing his body language ever so slightly for each person: “Mr. Allen, I do hope you’ll entertain me again if I’m ever back in central, I had a grand time. Dinah darling, I stand by what I said, Ollie was SO much nicer to kiss when we were in college. Princess, the boys and I are in your debt. Mr. Jones…”

Batman’s mind goes no thoughts, head empty. Martian Manhunter is both impressed and embarrassed, nodding in understanding as Batman turns to the final hero, smiling sweetly, brain still empty as a blank sheet of paper: “And, Mr. Kent…”

Batman steps closer, hand on Superman’s chest, hip cocked, Brucie Wayne smile in full effect: “Our conversation got… cut off, the other night, because I wasn’t sure if you’d be okay with me going further, which is a damn shame. Call on me, won’t you?”

Superman, realizing why a very eager Brucie Wayne stopped their makeout session short: “…huh? OH- um.. uh huh.”

Green Arrow, short circuiting: “No fucking- BRUCIE? How? How is that possible?”

Batman, backing away from a shutdown superman, the physical mask on his face hardly the most effective one in his arsenal: “Because I’m Batman.”

Bonus for @help-i-need-a-cool-username: Hal Jordan STILL doesn’t know who bruce wayne is.

a few months later:

GL: “So this big old money billionaire guy in gotham is connected to this, i think he’s called Wayne or smth.”

Justice league: “…”

Flash, had a FULL DAY of Brucie and was VERY aware of who he was with: “Uh… Hal?”

Green Lantern, who heard Bruce’s name in passing, while distracted, under loud club music + has tried to erase that night from his memory: “what?”

Batman, under his breath: “We can find your secret identity so easily, batman, you’re not that good, Batman, we’re just being polite, Batman.” Sure you fucking can, Jordan. You know, it’s polite to remember the names of people who you’ve fondled.”

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The thought that Brucie Wayne and Batman being two completely separate entities that Bruce can code switch between has consumed me especially with the idea that he mixes the two together on occasion to fuck with people

~~~~~~~~~

*Batman and Superman searching a dressing room*

Superman: What about this thing, it looks suspicious?

Batman *full Batman voice*: That’s an eyelash curler darling

~~~~~~~~

*OG JLA revealing identities to newbies*

Green Arrow: Your turn Bats, who are you?

Batman having decided to fuck with him walking up to him cocking his hip putting one hand on his chest and in full Brucie Wayne mode: C’mon Ollie-Dollie you know who I am. We dated 💕

Green Arrow (internally): Modem noise

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Recently revealed identities with Clark and Brucie being at the same party

Brucie: oh howdy 🤠 cowboy, fancy meeting you at this shindig

Clark *flustered* (internally): he can’t be Batman he can’t be Batman he can’t be Batman…

~~~~~~~~~

*Bruce getting a call during a JLA meeting*

Brucie: Oh! hello dear, yes of course I’m coming to your party I’ll see you later 😘

Batman: Our security measures need to be increased due to the number of criminals currently attempting to follow heroes to their base of operations

JLA *experiencing whiplash*: what.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*undercover Brucie and members of the JLA at a party*

Bruce *pretending to be drunk wandering over to the flash*: excuse moi but can I get your attention for just a momento😊

Flash *completely disconnecting Bruce and bats*: yeah uh sure sir are you alright

Batman *quiet but deep Batman voice*: there’s an assassin in the rafters

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"He understands me better than my own demons." (Bruce argues with Barbatos in Detective Comics #1083)

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🐉⚔️✨

do not repost, reblog only

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he'd begrudgingly agree that he has taste in music

songs referenced: 1, 2, 3, 4

do not repost, reblog only

twitter | ig | commissions | prints | ko-fi 

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Does anyone have any fic recommendations for when Izuku leaves to become a vigilante and Katsuki does NOT take it well like at all. Could be during or when he gets back

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Harleen: An Unpublished, Unofficial Continuation

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Hey I just have a quick question and I'm gonna try my best to not offend. I'm so sorry if I do. Anyway, do you have to be asexual to be aromantic? I'm not really sure what aromantic is but from what I understand it means you're not interested in romance and asexuals are, it's just the sex part they don't like. So basically can you be aromantic and still have sex?

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Has anyone noticed how opposite the clawthorne sister are? They even put there lipstick on opposite lips. Lilith on top and eda on the bottom.

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I need something about luz pulling human pranks on the twins plz

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If anybody has a fic of the blight kids not knowing how to do simple stuff like cleaning or doing laundry cause they're rich kids and it's BeNeAtH them that would be greatly appreciated

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What does the arab in your carrd mean? Is it like afab and amab?

.. i’m palestinian

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Imagine if luz started calling lilith tia by accident and then it just sorta keeps happening and lilith is like what does that even mean? Anyway if it could be named "5 times luz calls lilith tia and the one time lilith knew what that meant" that would be great. Especially if lilith finds out by reading a Spanish to English. Dictionary. Bonus points if she thinks it's a bad word or a friendly jab.

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Whenever a fanfic mentions how Amity and Luz met they always talk about when luz was pretending to be an abomination. They never mention " Oh actually I first saw you when you were being mean to Willow" like I want the realization to hit amity like a bus late for its next stop. " Hey remember when we first saw each other?" "Oh yeah you were kinda being a dick to willow". "What?" " Yeah when I first saw you, you were on your way to school and bumped into willow." ...... "You saw that?" "Yep the whole thing"

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So I just got some really really bad news from the vet.

Tazz has a tumor in his throat, it’s pushing on his airway and arteries. Tazz is having trouble breathing and he needs surgery.

But I can’t afford it.

I know everyone is fucked for money right now but I would appreciate anything that anyone could send to me. I’ve had Tazz since he was 8months old. He’s fifteen now. I was ten when I got him. I don’t wanna lose my boy. I’ve been crying ever since we got the news.

Here’s all of his vet costs. They don’t accept payments.

Please if anyone is able to donate to me I’m desperate. I’ll do anything to be able to make the money. My PayPal is right here. Please if you can’t donate reblog this. Because there’s a link in my post, it won’t show up in any tags on tumblr and I really need it to reach as many people as it can.

He’s such a good boy, please help me save his life.

0/5000$

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Hello I would greatly appreciate the sauce please

So I’m reading this doujin right and like- Shoto isn’t being flirty he’s just being blunt and Katsuki was takin it out of context and it was HILARIOUS

“But you’re only a childhood friend. So you don’t have the right to stop me.”

The FACE Bakugo makes 💀 like how dare this Christmas mistake say that

Katsuki “I better go confess to Izuku before fucking Icy Hot” Bakugo

Katsuki “I am the nerds #1 hero, fuckers” Bakugo