wandereroftheocean

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Achilles is appealing to me because he's a male character that exhibits clear signs of female Hysteria

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First of all this is so real. Paris is very cool and also over hated. But consider this, he’s rlly whiny (I love him for it and find it funny but still)

All the Paris hate is so annoying tbh

'Oh he started the war' the war was always going to happen, read the damn book

'He should have chosen Hera or Athena' much sexier to doom your people for power instead of love I guess

'He kidnapped Helen' Depends on your source. Also you favourite greek blorbo probably kidnapped more women

'He's an annoying coward' yes, and I love him for it. There's enough big burly dudes waging war, Paris might be annoying but at least he has some character

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By the end of the year she had taken to talking to herself, and had come to have a deep aversion to the color green.

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Guys should I add color?

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Why don't we have more content of Ody being a troll ?

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SONG 22: What’s the Deal With Achilles?

TELEMACHUS (curious, innocent):

So, what’s the deal with Achilles?

Like, who was that guy?

One minute he's crying, next he’s a legend,

Then he’s just dead—why?

(Silence. Everyone exchanges glances. Then, a chaotic eruption of voices.)

HECTOR (deadpan):

Oh, that guy.

PARIS (shuddering):

Ohhhhhh that guy.

CASSANDRA (whispered, haunted):

Oooooooh, that guy…

TELEMACHUS (confused):

Wait, what does that mean?

AGAMEMNON (booming):

HE WAS A WARRIOR! A DEMIGOD! A FORCE OF FURY!

PATROCLUS (soft, exasperated):

He was also so dramatic…

THETIS (ethereal, tragic):

My sweet little boy was a golden star…

(suddenly furious)

AND THEN YOU ALL RUINED HIM!

HECTOR (tense, recalling the fight):

Fast as the wind—couldn’t be caught,

A rage-filled child who never fought fair!

PARIS (bitter, muttering):

Could’ve just stayed home, but nooooo,

He had to be there…

PATROCLUS (sighing, nostalgic):

But he wasn’t always destruction and war,

He laughed, he sang—

(beat)

…okay, mostly destruction and war.

AGAMEMNON (grumbling):

A pain in my ass…

CASSANDRA (dead serious):

A fire too bright—it had to burn out…

(Dramatic pause. Then, suddenly—)

(Pyrrhus, Achilles' son, steps forward, arms crossed.)

PYRRHUS:

He was my father. A legacy.

And I…? Well, I plan to be better.

(Pause)

TELEMACHUS:

…Uh. Hi.

(Silence.)

TELEMACHUS (spoken):

Uh... so, um, do you—

(He hesitates, clearly caught up in the moment)

PYRRHUS (spoken):

Oh, I’ll tell you all about it later.

HECTOR (clearing throat, loudly):

Excuse me??

(Music screeches to a stop for a second.)

HECTOR (singing, regretfully):

Achilles was my enemy,

But we both shared the same pain,

Fighting for glory, but losing our souls,

Even if we win, we all lose in the end.

THETIS (singing, hauntingly):

My son, my beautiful child…

I knew from the start.

But I still tried to shield him from fate—

I dipped him in the river,

But that’s not how you cheat the gods.

Not even a mother can save him from the fall…

(Pause)

(The song speeds up as everyone fights over what Achilles really was.)

THETIS: A prince!

AGAMEMNON: A pain!

PATROCLUS: A lover!

HECTOR: A menace!

PARIS: A brat!

CASSANDRA: A warning!

PYRRHUS: A father!

TELEMACHUS: A WHAT?!

EVERYONE:

NOBODY KNOWS!

(Beat.)

ODYSSEUS:

I do?

(Telemachus SCREAMS.)

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Dear children of Priam, were you doomed all along?

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Guys serious question time for my better cr dr

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I’d pay GOOD money to watch Steve just absolutely read Tony/The gov (or anyone who deserved it really) for FLITH for just a few minutes

honestly steve deserved to be a little meaner in civil war

“steve you have to sign the accords”

“oh right i totally should sign my rights away to a government who i exposed to have been infiltrated by nazis for DECADES. i’m sure nothing bad will happen if i do that”

“i should let the government dictate my life when all i’ve ever done is save the world by going AGAINST the government. sounds like a great plan”

like t0ny stans love to say he was being horribly selfish and mean in civil war, which he… wasn’t, but i think he should have been

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Little Big Three 🌊⚡️☠️

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ares slays his daughter’s rapist

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Hiii! thx for asking, it’s really just MCU Tony, I felt he was kind of an ass and after civil war I just rlly didn’t like him. I like fanfic Tony (at least the ones I read with him), 2012 avengers tower fanfic hold up a special place in me. And for comic Tony I don’t read many comics with Tony as a central character but when he’s there as a side character I’m kinda neutral lol.

Now that the MCU has exploded on itself and everything went downhill there is one more secret I’d like to share with you; I did not give a fuck about Tony Stark, barely even liked the guy.

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*walks up to mic* Tony Stark should have never brought 15 year old Peter Parker into a battle field, Peter was a child and was in no place to be able to consent to help Tony in this, he couldn’t even go on a field trip without guardian consent. And Tony should be accurately judged and held accountable for this. *walks away from mic*

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I’m convinced that there are like 20 people in the whole world that actually understand Steve’s character and who he is at his core

I hate having to talk to people(my family) in my everyday life about Steve Rogers because like no bro, you do not get him!!

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Now that the MCU has exploded on itself and everything went downhill there is one more secret I’d like to share with you; I did not give a fuck about Tony Stark, barely even liked the guy.

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lmfaoo