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cluster b culture is doing things for attention and then being like "why the fuck did i did that"
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cluster b culture is lovebombing everyone in your life without even realizing it because you have no idea what an acceptable level of affection is
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i cannot tell if i start craving again more when hes around or less- his presence flares up my addiction so intensely and i cannot explain why
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i hate you so much, you let me run away and you keep letting me again and again and you won't pay attention to me when im screaming for you to notice me and hurt me and punish me and you gave me the most comforting hugs and the sweetest of kisses and made me feel so loved and fucking safe and i hate you so much for it.
why couldn't you hurt me like everyone else has?
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september is coming up so here’s your yearly reminder to leave billie joe armstrong the fuck alone
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everytime anything goes wrong i get the overwhelming urge to just end it all and i dont understand why
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why yhe fuck did i let myself think you cared when you felt comfortable going to sleep when i was literally losing myself to my self induced paranoia that YOU fucking caused in the bed next to you
#actually bpd#borderline personality disorder#borderline personality traits#bpd#bpd problems#bpd favorite person#favorite person#bpd fp#bpd splitting#borderline splitting
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Me every day on social security, in my apartment alone, suffering from debilitating mental illnesses.

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why haven't you abandoned me yet.
why won't you let me rot like everyone else did.
it was easier, when they let me sit here and suffer alone, cause now im even more attached now which makes me detached cause what if you decide after 6 years of dealing with my shit non fucking stop that it is too much?
why am i not too much for you? why can't you hurt me and abuse me and make me feel like shit like everyone else?
please stop dressing my wounds, let me die like a fucking wounded animal please
#actually bpd#borderline personality disorder#borderline personality traits#bpd problems#bpd#bpd stuff#bpd sucks#bpd things#bpd thoughts#trauma vent#trauma#bpd favorite person#favorite person
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cant talk rn i'm busy being a danger to myself
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please don’t leave,,
I CANT FUNCTION WITHOUT YOU
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"Your ideas are radical" Bro, I just want everyone to have food, water, shelter and healthcare.
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you love me too much and you haven't abandoned me yet and i almost hate you for it
#borderline personality disorder#actually bpd#borderline personality traits#bpd#bpd problems#bpd stuff#bpd sucks#bpd things#bpd thoughts#bpd fp#bpd favorite person#favorite person
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maybe they’re born with it, maybe it’s their cluster b personality disorder
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brb, gaslighting myself to stop being suicidal on your behalf
#bpd recovery#actually bpd#borderline personality disorder#borderline personality traits#bpd#bpd problems#bpd stuff#bpd sucks#bpd things#bpd thoughts#bpd vent#bpd mood#personality disorder
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my biggest pet peeve is when people say i can vent any time to them
like do you actually mean that, or are you saying that now, and then when you realize i have violently depressed episodes on the daily and im actually a really fucked up person you'll tell me that i don't understand fucking boundaries when it comes to venting?
pick a side, smh
#bpd vent#actually bpd#borderline personality disorder#borderline personality traits#bpd#bpd problems#bpd stuff#bpd things#bpd sucks#bpd thoughts#cw vent#personal vent
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