#youre telling me. they were partners for 7 YEARS?? and you think they werent friends for not even ONE year of htat??? youre insane

[bigender2]

the FFF (Freddie Florence Friendship) has to prevail always it means so fucking much to me

[joesanimationblog]

Character Questions 1

1

What is your full name? Jen

How did your parents decide on your name? Im not sure, I was one of 7 and have a big family, i think it might have been the only name left

What’s your favourite colour? Green or orange

Where do you live? Im moving at the moment, I lived here in the oasis but each year it shrinks and my family move away. I dont know why its shrinking or where im going but I hope I can find a place to give my family a safe place to settle

Are you wealthy, poor or comfortable? Until recently we were comfortable, but as the oasis has shrunk weve had to spend longer and longer forraging. theres really no food here anymore.

What is your greatest fear? I am scared that the desert never ends. there used to be trees on the horizon but in the past few years theyve receeding. I cant tell if they are there anymore.

Do you have any medical problems, diseases, injuries? I have a bad leg, It makes it hard to move far away and thats why ive stayed in the oasis for so long, I thought it would get better but now i know its time to move on.

Are you religious? I believe in nature and though natures receeded back into the desert i still have hope that ill find it again

Do you have any pets? I have enough on my plate with my children

10.What is your biggest dream? A home where the grass is always green

11.What is your favourite food? Carrots

12.Are you in a relationship? I have a husband but he left on the turtle yesterday, me and the kids will be getting the next turtle behind him. He left before us because there wasnt enough space for us all to go together. I hope hes okay.

13.What did you study in school? I was never good at school but I enjoyed art

14.What is your job? Im an artist, but with things as they are its been hard to find people willing to trade for my paintings.

15.Are you political? I wish there were leaders here who could have made the oasis prosperous. It seems that people took all they could and left. My faith in the leaders is not what it once was since mayor jeffery left last year.

16.Who is your favourite person in the world? I love dolly parton, her music has helped me though some hard times.

17.Have you experienced death? When i injured my leg I almost died, I was attacked by a gang of frogs, they whipped me down and took everything i had. If it werent for The Fox I would have been toast

18.What is your favorite book? I like Alice in wonderland, I sometimes wish a small girl would lead me to a hole to a new world too.

19.What do you hate? I hate that there are people who take from the land without giving back, then they move on to the next place to exploit

20.What do you love? Community. Its the only thing which has kept us safe all these years.

21.What makes you angry? I am angry at the tubes, since they appeared its been down hill as they drained the life from our community.

22.What do you do on Sundays? I read, paint and listen to dolly parton. but to be honest its been hard to find time in the past few years with my young children, I spend time with them in the hovel

23.Do you lie? Not often, sometimes i embelish stories.

24.Are you violent? Absolutely not.

25.Are you an introvert or an extrovert? I consider myself a quiet extrovert.

26.Who would you lay down your life for? My kids.

27.If you could describe yourself in one sentence, what would you say? Im a simple mother looking to make the best of their situation for their children, looking for a place to listen to dolly parton.

28.If your (best friend, wife, daughter, partner, boss, neighbor etc.) were to describe you in one sentence, what do you think he/she would say? Im not sure, i guess theyd say im kind of boring but that im reliable.

29.What do you think is the meaning of life? To look out for one another.

30.What is your biggest misbelief about yourself? I am always optimistic and always think i can do more than i can.

31.What is your worst habit? I smoke, i dont know why i started but it was when i was younger. i guess I was trying to rebel about my instincts.

32.What is your best quality? I always do my best.

What would your character say if they were offered their dream job? If it meant they could support their family then absolutely yes.

What would your character say if their house was on fire? Oh god my house is on fire.

What would your character say after a proposal of marriage they are married.

2

[witchcraft-in-wonderland]

Logan's Birthday (1/7)

-------------------------

Logan was a smart man, he always had been, top of his class since he was little. But being smart only got you so far, there always came a time when you just werent smart enough.

For Logan, that time was adulthood. So many years worth of studying, gone at the slightest notion that someone else was- better. And of course, Logan knew exactly what made his competitors better, but saying it out loud, that was paramount to insulting the company.

So here he was, twenty-two years of age and stuck in an apartment, sifting through job applications and bills, as if he'd ever have enough to pay them off.

"Oh yes Logan go on take only honors and AP classes for the rest of your life, I'm sure it'll all turn out fine," Logan muttered bitterly.

He let out a groan of annoyance as the tv flickered through one of his least favorite commercials.

He'd always despised fashion and makeup companies, but the Kingsley company was another story on it's own. He couldnt explain it, for all he knew it was some odd combination of self hatred and toxic societal expectations, he just couldn't stand those twins, with their overly wide smiles and stupid overzealous compliments. But of course, most other people bought it. So Logan always assumed there was something wrong with him.

Eventually Logan finished with the papers, setting them aside and walking to the kitchen.

"Like anyone would pay thirty bucks for a makeup set that's going to fall apart two days afterward," Logan muttered, glaring at the tv. He walked over to the coffee machine and got started on his fourth cup for that day. It wasnt healthy, Logan knew that, he'd done an entire report on it in sixth grade, but it was the only way he could seem to stay up without having a breakdown.

Logan looked over at his to-do list for that day, he never seemed to finish them, so he had no idea why he bothered. He checked off the section labelled "bills and applications" before walking back to the coffee machine and picking up the mug. He watched the sunrise outside the window, he always liked sunrises more in the colder months, they were much brighter.

Logan finished his coffee and set the cup in the sink, checking his watch. His mother had set up a job interview for him, but all she'd given him was an address and a time, he certainly didnt want to be late. He walked to his closet and pulled out a blue sweater, black vest, black pants, and dress shoes.

"5629, Ridgeport Avenue, should be interesting," Logan muttered as he fixed his tie. He'd never exactly liked Ridgeport, it was a rich people and idiots thinking they could make it big on stupid ideas.

But what awaited Logan when he reached the location was far worse than what he was expecting.

"Mother I told you I dont want anything to do with this company!" Logan hissed over the phone, currently hiding out in the bathroom, he may have hated the Kingsley company, but he wasmt stupid enough to insult them where someone might hear.

"Its good pay! You can suck up your pride for once in your life cant you?" His mother replied.

"Me, a secretary for those- those-" Logan couldnt seem to find the right words for it, all he cod think was 'Ew' and 'Not in a million years'.

"I'll call you back after the interview," Logan said, hanging up and stuffing the phone back in his pocket. He fixed his hair in the mirror before rushing back out, after all, he did have a meeting in thirty minutes.

"Logan Sanders," The intercom sounded, the voice of Remus Kingsley flooded the room. Logan felt his stomach lurch as he stood up. He trudged down the hall, fiddling with his tie. He finally reached the door to Remus' office, and knocked twice.

"I'm not naked if that's what you're thinking," Logan held back the urge to vomit as he processed the sentence, and then he opened the door.

Remus Kingsley was a tall man, with a white striped birthmark in his hair, and a mustache that gave him the impression of a man who'd gorged himself on mud. His clothes didnt help much, a ripped jacket paired with a green shirt and twice as torn black jeans, his feet were even propped up on the desk for gods sakes.

"I'm here for the secretary position," Logan said as he closed the door.

"Well secretaries arent supposed to stand are they?" Remus said, moving his feet and gesturing toward the chair in front of the desk. Logan took a seat and finally let go of his tie.

"So what sparked your interest in the position?" Remus said, very obviously reading off notecards.

Logan bit back the urge to say 'brute force and a ransom note'.

"I've seen a lot of your commercials, the name was recognizable," Logan said.

"Oh so you've heard of us?" Remus said, now checking his nails. Logan was getting more annoyed by the minute.

"Yes, I have," Logan replied, biting the inside of his cheek to keep from growling.

"Great! You're hired! You can start tomorrow," Remus said with a grin, Logan noticed he was missing one of his front teeth. He slid a sheet of paper across the desk, Logan looked it over and pocketed it before getting up.

"Very well, I suppose I'll see you tomorrow," Logan said as he walked out.

"I could get used to seeing that face every day," Remus said, Logan felt his face heat up slightly, though he could scarcely tell if it was from rage, or from something else. He merely nodded and closed the door behind him on his way out, rushing through the lobby and out into the streets of Ridgeport.

"This is it- my life is over, this is how I die," Logan had decided to meet up for coffee with his friend Remy, and the conversation had turned very quickly to Remus' comment at the end of the meeting.

"I mean it could be worse, at least you're both in the same age-range," Remy replied, taking a sip from his iced coffee.

"I dont know how you're drinking that when its 27 degrees out," Logan said with a laugh.

"Nothing will ever be as cold as my heart," Remy said, grinning.

"Oh? Cold-hearted are we? Then please, do tell me where all those photos of Emile huddled up under your arm with his head buried in your chest came from,"Logan said sarcastically.

"Oh Em, the only person warm enough to melt my poor icy cold heart," Remy said, bringing a hand to his forehead and falling back slightly.

"Gods you're so cheesy," Logan said, rolling his eyes.

"You're just mad because you dont have a queerplatonic partner to give you forehead kisses every night before you go to sleep," Remy said.

"I dont need a partner of any kind, I'm fine on my own," Logan replied.

"Sure you are bud, sure you are," Remy said.

And that stuck with Logan the rest of the week. He had a lot more interactions with Remus than he'd expected to, sometimes they felt- planned. But Logan could swear up and down he was imagining things, there was no way someone as influential, nor as self-absorbed, as a Kingsley would've spared him a second glance.

And he carried this thought process with him, that is, until he found a letter on his desk. A letter, inviting him to the company Christmas party, from Remus.

"Did you get my letter?" Remus leaned on Logan's desk, that same grin he always wore plastered on his face.

"Yes, though I dont think you specified the office you want it delivered to?" Logan replied.

"Oh! My bad, I think it was right abooouuuuttt- here," Remus pressed a finger to Logan's nose, Logan tensed slightly, his cheeks flushed red.

"You turn a very pretty red when you're nervous," Remus purred, resting his head on his arms, which were now crossed over Logan's desk wall.

"I-" Logan wasnt sure what to say, here was all the evidence, right in front of his face, and yet he still didnt dare believe it.

And he didnt believe it, not until the day of the Christmas party, where he arrived in a limousine, hand in hand with the man, to a cruise ship of all places, wearing, for the first time in his life, a stunning midnight blue dress, that made him feel like he was worth a glance.

Though of course, no amount of party dresses could top that which he wore on his wedding night, a floor length gown of Remus' own design, studded with pearls and sequins, reflecting blue lights everywhere he walked.

"Remember how I said I wouldnt mind seeing a face like yours every day?" Remus said, smiling as he moved Logan's veil.

"Well, you wont have to worry about that now, will you?" Logan said, smiling, and he relished in the kiss that Remus placed on his lips, Remus' arm pulling Logan closer and closer by the waist, until the space between them was so thin that they were almost attached.

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Tag list:

@thefivecalls

@willowaudreykeyes

@pricklyfish777

@the-sad-strawberry

@private-snippers

@extercs-experiences

@theonetruebeepboop

@mycatshuman

@teamplutoforlife

@melodiread

@meowthefluffy

@frawkeye

@cemmy

@nerosdayinhell

@thecolorfulolive

@frog-candy-bee

[iamtheempress]

Cold Blooded

A Dragon Ball Horror Fic {Part 12}

☆☆☆

Not even a whole day is all it took, and goddamn was it a long day for Vegeta. Time was of the essence and gods knew how much longer they had until Frieza did anything to the Earth, and Vegeta be damned if another planet be killed under his watch by the likes of Frieza… The biggest waste of carbon life in the known universe.

Vegeta had a vendetta, for the sake of his race, and his woman, his eyes not leaving his lovers face, his fiance, his mate.. Bulma coulda sworn he watched him shed a tear. All the Z fighters were in attendance to help scout for the Dragon Balls. Words were left unspoken between the group. They haven't experienced a death so immediate in their lives as of recently. The most recent being several years and several fights ago.

Bulma came in and looked at the sullen princes back, he's cradling her like a baby.. Looking constantly at the woman that took his breath away. “Vegeta..? Vegeta, Goku is coming back now he has the last two. Everyones outside and ill walk with you.. shes my friend too.. been one for a long long time...” She muttered pushing the blonde locks from Carlies face, still teary eyed from finding her friend dead on the ground of her laboratory.

 “He took her ring… He took it from her lifeless hand. Frieza is a monster.. And if he continues to breathe the same air of this universe ill make sure everyone he encounters, know hes a monster… the…” He turned to her and  started walking back down the hallway, Bulma in tow and holding the 7 star ball in her hand. “You saw the camera footage did you…” Bulma asked, Vegeta remained silent.. He saw everything. To say he didnt feel pride in her to see her fight to her last breath would be a lie. Why did it have to be her.. Why didnt he stay with her… He blamed himself every step of the way. “She fought to her last breath… and she took her last breath into that god damned monsters mouth…” He growled adjusting his woman's corpse in his arms, she's shrouded in a blanket. Her head supported on his bicep so it wouldn't flop about seeing as though Frieza crushed it entirely flat. He didn't speak to anyone. The balcony was uncharacteristically quiet for the amount of people standing around. Bulma added the 5th dragon ball to the group and as she heard it clack, Goku instant transmissioned to Vegetas side, pat his shoulder and looked at Carlie, “I couldn't fly any longer, you needed these now.”  The moment Goku returned with the final two he spoke up. Goku added Dragon Ball 6 and 7 to the pile and looked Vegeta in the eye in that same look Goku always gives.. But this time.. Much somber and understanding. “If it was ChiChi id be the same way…” The two Saiyans looked to the small dead human… “It's all you Vegeta. Floors all yours.” Goku pat his back and backed up abit, his excitable demeanor literally pissed Vegeta off to no end, there's a reason Vegeta even considered Kakarot a friend and this was that one reason. It’s now or never.

The balcony of Capsule Corp has now seen everything and summoning SHenron here was certainly not a first. A dead woman in the arms of the prince is a first for many. “Come forth mighty Shenron.” He asked watching the sky turn black and the Dragon snakes across the sky and looks down upon Vegeta. A glorious and frightening sight to behold.

“You have 3 Wishes… What is your first wish?” It bellows, its voice booming, Godlike. “I wish for Carlie to be alive again.. And without wounds of what happened.” He asked plainly looking down at her face. “Your wish has been granted… she will return to the land of the living shortly…” Vegeta sighs in relief, that wave of ease falls upon the group as Bulma wipes sweat from her brow. “You have 2 more wishes.”

Vegeta completely was besides himself.. 2 more wishes. He gulped hard. He considered his words carefully, “If it wasnt for me she would be alive… I wish for her nothing but happiness, even if im not there.” He sounded defeated. Like hes considering leaving her.. He hated thinking on it but he wanted to give the wish a shot. The dragon blinked and spoke, “Her wish was granted many years ago. She wished for a prince, success and happiness, all in one wish.” Vegeta was dumbstruck, her one wish to him was all 3 at once.. And she got that. Even if she was dead. “Now. What are your two wishes?”

The prince grinned. “Dragon, I wish Frieza lives the rest of his days knowing what he did to her.. And i hope it hurts him like hell.. Every waking moment of his miserable life.” He snarls. Shenrons head lowers closer to Vegeta’s  view and speaks. “Your wish has been granted for the rest of his days; he will live with the scars she has given him. What is your final wish?” The mighty eternal dragon asked Vegeta, the dark sky swirling as the dragon prepared himself to return back to the center of the earth.

Vegeta grinned widely, “Make that tyrant unable to destroy the Earth. I wont let him destroy this planet.” HE growls viciously Carlies hand twitching slightly, Vegeta noticed this and looked down. “Your wishes have been granted, farewell.” The dragon announced and returned to his place in the center of the Earth releasing the sky of its complete darkness and returning the mid afternoon suns rays to bestow themself upon the sorrowful prince and the rest of the z fighters. Carlie squinted her eyes and grimaced only to open them and feel her neck and stomach, shocked and face once again filled with color. “Vegeta…! What..? WHere? I was just…-” She stammered holding onto Vegeta, Bulma ran over to her partner and kissed her forehead “No more questions alright? Your back and thats all that matters. Dont worry about your lab ill take care of that, Car.” She winked and made the blonde scientist smile and blush.

Goku rubbed the back of his neck and pat Vegetas back. “Oh yea i shoulda told you about her wish to have all that back there should I hehe!” Vegeta rolled his eyes and scoffed “Quit your babbling idiot.. Its not like she wouldnt have had all three of those wishes WITHOUT the Dragon Balls.. We were destined to meet, end of discussion.” The prince smiled and met foreheads with her feeling the warmth of her face against his made him feel alright one again.

Two spiteful wishes for the price of her coming back was worth it. Worth bringing his princess back. The Emperor on the other hand; was suffering on the outreaches of the solar system upon his ship, his once pristine white membrane tainted by deep scars in the form of golden long scratches raking in every which way. Making it look like he lost a long arduous fight with a barbed wired fence. He looked like hell and he was raising it substantially upon his ship screaming and cursing the woman who brought such a disgusting parting gift to him. The emperor fell to his knees and looked up at a wall that was completely monochromatic. His reflection was telling. The broken tooth, the long scratch on his chin down his sternum. The ones that caked his whole chest. Tainted in golden veins. He would be perfect if they werent there, but alas. Here we have the Emperor. Shedding his first tear. For a brilliant young Earthling he fell hopelessly inlove with, one who's betrothed to the one race he swore to exterminate but failed miserably. To the Warrior Prince nonetheless. This is a reminder of Frieza’s biggest failure… and that ring in his hand felt like molten hot metal, but he cant take himself to part with it at all, its too much for him.. Like he misses her with all of his being.

He in a frustrated fury looked over this ring to inspect why it burnt him so harshly.. Surely there has to be a logical reason. He read the inscription. “Strengths in our Blood.”

☆☆☆

Authors note: I really gotta thank everyone who supported me every step of the way with this fic it was REALLY fun and unique to write! I loved everyone who said that it was great and im more than happy to create more with time. I love you all expect more !!!!!

@dragonblobz @lilfriezatyrant @gallickingun @kamehamethot @gonuclear @memevember @msgreenverse @lizardhipsdontlie @thotful-writing @supremeleadershitlord​ @memevember​ @dragonball-hcs-or-sum-shit

[letsperaltiago]

I give up, I'm in love crying out to you |Jake x Amy|

So this is the post ”Yippie Kayak” fic I talked about! And honestly... I’m not super happy with how it turned out, compared to what I had in mind, but... I hope someone out there will enjoy it. Maybe

xx!

word count: 2.8k

The red and blue lights coming from the remaining police cars reflected back off his slightly pale face as he started the car, carefully driving away from the surrounded Goodwin’s before turning down the main street. Since Jake had quickly been pulled away from her to get checked by a paramedic as soon as they pulled back from their passionate reunion kiss, neither of them had gotten to say much to the other after Jake escaped the hostage situation. He’d quickly shrugged off his leather coat then hoodie before giving her the latter before he was pulled aside. Since then Amy had spent the time checking up on Gina and Charles, secretly feeling unsettled and almost burdened even though Jake was clearly safe and sound. Why?

So she wondered still as they quietly drove off and away from the chaos. It was just the two of them in Jake’s car. Maybe she didn’t say anything but on the inside Amy felt like screaming and crying, almost like she wanted to speak out but some unknown force pushed the words back down her throat. More than anything she didn’t want him to notice, because then he’d worry and he was the last person who should worry about someone else. He’d just been beaten by robbers and held hostage, for God’s sake! Although it probably didn’t help keeping her messy state of mind secret that she uneasily, shuffling in her seat, kept looking back and forth between the bypassing streets and his focused, slightly bruised face. Either his mind was somewhere else, which was completely understandable, or he chose to bite his tongue and not comment on it.

“Should I drop you off at home?” After such a long silence, his voice almost startled her, causing Amy’s head to quickly whip away from the window and in his direction instead like a deer caught in headlights. They usually slept at her place, almost everyday besides a few times a week whenever one or both needed a bit of me-time, so this caught the young woman a bit off guard. Did he ask because he wanted to drop her off and go home alone? Or was he just being polite? During the 7 months they’d been together, Amy had never turned to overthinking like this and it scared her. Jake would never have ulterior motives when it come to her - or anyone else, for that matter. What was wrong with her?

“Ames?” Without taking his eyes off the road for too long he allowed himself to take a quick glance of her, obviously confused by the lack of response he got from his otherwise always very clear and palpable girlfriend.

“Oh, sorry. I just-“ she bit her lip, silencing herself with her thinking. Honestly she wanted nothing more but to tell him no. No, she didn’t want him to just drop her off and act like nothing had happened. Actually the very last thing she wanted after coming so close to losing him was to go home alone - without him. Then she remembered that her bag (having held clean, warm clothes) from the polar swim and stinky, soaked jacket was still in his trunk, and last-mentioned item probably needed a good wash. She also did happen to have a full day of Christmas celebration with her enormous family waiting for her tomorrow on the 25th, so… Though every signal within herself told her that she didn’t want to, that it was wrong, it probably would be easier to just go home and get the last chores crossed off her mental list.

“Uhm, yeah. My place is fine.”

Out of the corner of her eye she could sense a nod, immediately sending her heart crashing into her gut. First the polar swim, then the hostage situation and now this? What a shitty Christmas eve. 10 minutes of silence later, he pulled over in front her apartment building and turned off the engine. Neither of them seemed to be able to break that eyes, staring straight ahead out the front window with stiff postures and mingled thoughts.

“So we’re here,” Amy finally mumbled, slowly and almost unwillingly reaching for the door handle.

Jake turned in his seat, scanning her up and down with his tired, yet always so gentle eyes.

Words were burning in her throat, making it feel like a muddy mixture of feelings and tears balling up in trachea. It was pure agony and it just wasn’t worth it, when she was with this wonderful man who’d never laugh at or dismiss anything she said. She needed to calm down and trust him.

“Would you mind coming upstairs with me? Just for a second,” she finally managed to almost gurgle out and finally looking back at him.

“No, of course not.” He smiled weakly, pausing for a moment, before leaning over the gap between their seats to peck her temple. “Let me help you with your stuff.”

So there they were, just 2 minutes later, after climbing the few stairs to her first floor apartment. The flicking of a switch by the entrance door drenched the living room/kitchen in a soft yellow light, which allowed them both to make their way to the center of the room.

“Should I just put it on a hanger it in your bathroom?” Jake asked sweetly, making Amy’s heavy heart do summersaults because of the fact that he’d read her mind before doing anything else.

She sent him a grateful smile, “Yeah, thanks. Just make sure to-“

“Hang it in the shower, so it won’t drip on the floor?”

Amy could tell by the way her boyfriend’s  eyes light up and his lips morphed into a crooked, boyish smile that he was proud of the fact that he’d managed finish her sentence just right. Sometimes she forgot that not only had they been dating for 7 months, but he’d also been her best friend for longer and partner against crime for even longer. There was no denying that he, more than anyone else and even herself, knew her the best. A weak smile growing on her lips at the thought let him know he was right, and then there was nothing else for her to do but to follow him with her eyes as he walked off to the bathroom with her icy ocean-coat.

Everything was so good between them and there was absolutely no denying it. Then why did she slump down on her couch with a heavy sigh and an even heavier her, she wondered. What was it about today; about her; about him, that made it seem like she was holding back and onto some kind of secret. A heavy slump back against the back of the couch seemed appropriate for the situation. Few steps wandered down the hall towards her, coming closer and closer. Next thing she knew he was back, standing by the kitchen at the opposite end of the room, freezing in his track when he noticed her hopeless expression. A staring contest between the two seemed to be initiated, but truth be told, she was not taking in just his eyes. Also the dark circles that surrounded them, his short, but nonetheless curls very messy from the day’s actions, his posture only emphasised how he probably felt - yet Amy Santiago had never before been so sure of one thing.

“Amy, is everything okay?”

Okay, the jig was up. He’d definitely noticed her being way off the entire night. Maybe he had been so too, but he, on the other hand, had an actual excuse.

“Yeah,” the following sigh did not reassure him. “Come sit with me for a second. Please?” She let her hands dance across the empty space by her side.

It truly did feel like walking into the belly of the beast, but ready for whatever she was going to throw at him, the eager detective made his way to the empty spot beside her and placed himself facing her. One leg bent on the couch, the other hanging off the side as he rested his side against the couch’s soft back. Another silence swallowed them both. Right in front of him, so close that he could reach out and touch her even though he didn’t dare to right then, Amy was nervously pushing her hair back behind her ears. Normally a double-tuck was a good sign, Jake couldn’t help but notice, but the current moment seemed to be way off and inconsistent.

“Ames, you’re kinda freaking me out here. Are we okay? Are you okay?”

The fact that he emphasised the ‘you’ more than the ‘we’ once again told her that he was the greatest man alive, obviously caring more about her than himself and them. A smile was not to be held back and her left hand, rebelliously in the name of love, expressed the same intractableness by reaching forward and cupping his cheek. Like a tear, though they weren’t present, Jake felt her thumb dance downards across his face and a million butterfly were set free in his stomach.

“Yes,” she nodded softly. “Both me and us. More importantly: Are you okay?”

He nodded softly into the her hand’s fingerhold, secretly wishing she would elaborate instead of redirecting the worry towards him. “I’m okay. Tonight was scary, but now I’m here with you. And though it might seem cheesy, it’s what matters to me.”

She nodded back, and though her mind was racing, trying to fight and make sense of all of her thoughts, her lips parted with willingness to speak. “It’s okay to be cheesy. It’s what matters to me too: Us…” She hesitantly allowed a pause, breathing in and unconsciously ran her tongue across her upper lip, considering if she should continue. This was Jake Peralta. With them it had always been this weird game of ‘in-between but never quite there’. The years of pining, the ‘never-single-at-the-same time’, keeping it light and breezy, almost breaking up twice within their first week together… It all came rushing back like an avalanche, pushing Amy over the edge of her emotional mountain. This time she wasn’t going to stay stuck in the middle; she was going big or going home - and she was already home, so there really was no way around it. “… Which I guess is why I’ve been so weird all night.”

Jake Peralta tilting his head slightly to the side in wonder was somehow the cutest and worst sight in the entire world - worst because she knew he did it out of confusion and precariousness. Amy Santiago wasn’t one to be overly confident with men, but these 7 months together had definitely taught her that she held his heart in his hands. His secretly very fragile, loving heart. On the other hand though, she also knew that he also held hers. Vulnerably and firmly all at once.

“You…” along with a heavy breath, her hand dropped from his face into his lap to hold his. Her gaze followed behind. “Being in danger like you were tonight really got me thinking about how important you are to me.” Her sincere brown eyes finally looked, to his relief, back up at him as those last words danced off her lips. Tender yet alert eyes and an understanding not from her boyfriend let Amy know that he was listening - he usually did whenever she spoke - and pushed her to continue. Taking this leap meant that there was no turning back around. “Li-,” her breath hitched, when tears suddenly welled in her eyes with urge to leap over the edge and down her cheeks. “Like it just got me thinking about the fact that just barely 3 years ago, I could never live with you. Never share a life with you, never be in the same room as for more than a few minutes without going absolutely insane,” she squeezed their joined hands in reassurance. “Never touch you like this. We seemed to be two opposites in all the worst ways. Impossible to unify.”

Though it was obviously with caution, seeing how affected by the matter his girlfriend was, Jake smiled remembering how they used to be cat and mouse. Those times seemed so far away these days.

“And now, today,” the hitch in her voice repeated itself; this time causing a tingle tear to stream down her face. Even soaked in tears, her eyes never left his and if Jake wasn’t completely delusional from all of the surfacing emotions, he could’ve sworn tears were welling up in his as well. “It just really hit me that I could never live without you.”

Almost like a bomb, silence dropped and blasted through the space around them. It sucked them into a black hole of everything from utter vulnerability to raw emotion and everything in between. Amy quickly noticed how her boyfriend’s eyebrows had cocked upwards, along with his suddenly much more awake eyes, in surprise.

“There’s before, now and after; me before you, me with you and I never want there to be a ‘me after you’, Jake Peralta.”

His jaw failed to keep his mouth shot, allowing his lips to part in awe like a kid having just discovered a secret treasure of gold, diamonds and pearls.

Her heart picked up pace as well as her termbling voice.

“God, I don’t know if this is moving too fast; if it’s right or wrong… But I’m just gonna say it. I desperately need you to know.”A brief pause pierced the moment, the three words welling up inside her mouth.

“I love you.”

His lips slowly merged back into a soft smile, his eyes glistening with joy as he brought his strong hands across the distance between them to hold her face and look into her eyes.

“I love you too, Ames.”

Finally, turning out to be what she needed more than anything that night, he used the hands attached to her face to pull her into a soft, tender kiss. A heavy weight suddenly dropped from her shoulders, her chest becoming lighter and fluttering as well. Within seconds her fingers wrapped around his wrists which were attached his hands that still cupped her now also smiling face. Their lips pressed together still, sparks flying like it was the first time instead of somewhere within the millions - probably - Amy knew she’d made the right decision. She loved Jake Peralta and he deserved to know.

His forehead pressed against hers, never disconnecting, as their lips parted and a dynamic energy travelled around them and the room. Amy could tell he was smiling; she was too after all.

“Tell me we’re end game?”  

When he slowly tilted his head just an inch back, Amy felt the tip and bridge of his nose gently stroke up her own. Upon having finally tilted it up and back far enough to reach her forehead, he pressed a tender kiss to it. It lasted longer than their rare, but yet sweet, little forehead kisses usually would. It almost felt like his lips had gotten stuck, but then suddenly to Amy’s secret dismay, he pulled his whole upper body back to look at her properly with glistening eyes and a happy grin. Amy’s heart on the other hand was anything but calm, thumping louder and harder than she ever imagined possible. Why wasn’t he saying anything? Maybe declaring her love like that was a bit too much for an otherwise emotionally cut off person like Jake. Maybe she should’ve just stuck to “I love you”… Or just nothing at all; she should’ve sent him back home and slept by herself tonight.

Yet suddenly it was clear to her that the confusion and anxiety must’ve been clearly written across her face, because once more and always preferably, Jake Peralta’s hands were buried deep within and messing up her glistening black locks like they were the last sensation he’d ever experience. His soft soft lips grabbed hers, telling her that she’d never be alone ever again though she still sometimes feared she would. More. She wanted it all and more, so she quickly reached across, grabbing the collar of his famous grey hoodie. If it was even possible by then, seeming to be as close as possible, she pulled on it and him. His lips scrunched into a smile against her desperate kiss. Suddenly his kiss wandered off too the side, onto her cheek; her chin; her hairline before ending on the top of her head with her cheek resting securely on top of his shoulder and arms wrapped tightly around her frame. Like they should be. Always.

“Amy Santiago, we’ve always been end game.”

[iwillretitlethisatalaterdate]

jan 22

2019

Means that today i am TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD!! wow. absolutely preposterous. its bittersweet in that i’m getting older and moving to new stages in life (will get to that since its why im here), but at the same time it’s kind of a bummer i truly have not done very much with myself; not as much as i’d presumed i would and certainly not as much as my family hoped. really, i put it down to not a lot more than laziness - as a dear friend once reminded me, “you didn’t finish uni because you couldnt, its because you werent motivated” and that really sums the whole thing up. uni wasnt for me. i entered it under the assumption that there was literally no other option, and because everyone around me at the time knew it was what they wanted, so it was what i wanted, right??? i loved studying in school, correct?? i didnt prioritise/take more of an interest in my dads 50th birthday than my HSC, did i???? LOL

speaking of other more relevant things that i never really put thought towards was starting a family and being a mum. i swore up and down for many years that i “hated” children, couldnt relate to them. couldnt understand why anyone under thirty would want one. couldnt understand why anyone over thirty would want one. i’d never have them, sorry. having children is for boring people who have no idea what else theyre gonna do with their life so they become a parent to keep themselves busy while they wait to die, to convince themselves that their life had a purpose - to be a parent as opposed to cure cancer, run a business, own a mansion. 

flash forward to thursday last week and my feeling the need to take a pregnancy test “just in case” and wow have i been in my head since then. actually, to be fair, flash forward to just under a year ago when i met a guy who simply lured me right in, who i wanted to be near at all times for unknown reasons, whose magnetic force was stronger than that of anybody ive ever known. he had a three year old son and we all quickly fell in love and i even more quickly saw kids in a new light; they were tiny human beings with brains like sponges, with mountains of love to give and an untainted view of the world around them. it quickly dawned on me how love from a child was different than love from a partner or a friend or parent. world’s apart. i was so happy to have discovered this love and reciprocate it, had no idea who the old me who despised children and would (oh my god i cant believe im going to write this) mimic shooting them with a gun shaped out of my fingers even was.  

anyway, back to thursday, back to when i gave in and bit the bullet and needed to find out if my period was late just because or if it wasn’t late at all, it was right where it was supposed to be due to something else going on.

ive taken a few of these pee stick tests in my life for a couple of reasons (UTI mainly, bastards). the waiting game when i was younger had me literally shaking and very aware of my racing heart as it throbbed throughout my whole body. this time was different. i read the word “pregnant” (one of these new age digital ones, maybe it was faulty - stay tuned) and was kind of just like “oohhhhkaaaaayyyyyyy”. freaked out but not in a “im 17 this cannot be happening” way, more like “im twenty five soon and still dont have a job, plus we live at home with his family” type thing. 

i called matt and he too was relatively unphased, “it’s alright, it’ll be okay. we’ll figure out, i don’t want you to worry about it, alright?”. Well, yes boss, okay then! I proceeded to go do my shift at work, saw some kids and pregnant ladies and wondered what itd be like to work retail with a belly. wondered about abortion. wondered if i should be careful when squatting down to locate items for needy customers.

since then, matt and i have talked. my friends and i have talked. it’s early days and im honestly super unsure but if im honest the idea excites me. matt tells me i’d be a great mum, and i think i would be. ive always said id hate to bring a human into this abysmal world. but at the same time i’d love to teach a human how to better the world, how to be different to me and those before me, how to do and be better, dont make any of the mistakes that i did. care about the environment. love yourself. have manners. show emotion. trust me. trust yourself. dream big. love animals. stay positive. be healthy. discuss your feelings. prioritise your family and friends. dont go to uni just because everyone else is, go when you know what youd like to do or be. dont try get a full time job at 25 when you have absolutely no experience because youve messed around and let the last 7 years pass you by.

[ahmuteun]

Psst do them all. 😄😄😄

hello my dear beverage lolsorry anon, she beat u to it

1. Are looks important in a relationship?

yeah, i think you should be attracted to the person youre with

2. Are relationships ever worth it?

some are, some arent

3. Are you a virgin?

heh

4. Are you in a relationship?

nah

5. Are you in love?

nah

6. Are you single this year?

i have been for the majority of it

7. Can you commit to one person?

i can but i dont want to right now

8. Describe your crush

i dont have one

9. Describe your perfect mate

i dont wanna think about that

10. Do you believe in love at first sight?

no because im not a child

11. Do you ever want to get married?

i mean if dami and i are both single by our mid 30′s were marrying each other

12. Do you forgive betrayal?

depends

13. Do you get jealous easily?

nah, im not a jealous person

14. Do you have a crush on anyone?

see 8

15. Do you have any piercings?

just one on each ear

16. Do you have any tattoos?

none yet

17. Do you like kissing in public?

i’d rather kiss in private

20. Do you shower every day?

yeah

21. Do you think someone has feelings for you?

i know someone does....

22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?

i mean im holding a conversation with sam at the moment so i know sam is thinking of me at least

23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?

im not a cheater, so yes

24. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?

god no

25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year?

god no

26. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?

yes

27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you?

no

28. Have you ever been cheated on?

no

29. Have you ever cheated on someone?

no

30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body?

when i was younger my parents and i planned on getting me the double eyelid surgery but now i dont care enough to want it

31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?

yeah

32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?

yeah i think so

33. Have you ever had sex with a man?

heh

34. Have you ever had sex with a woman?

heh

35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

all the people ive kissed are older than me 

36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends?

i liked someone who became one of my best friends, but i dont believe ive ever liked one of my best friends

37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?

no? well..... i mean they didnt hate the person, a lot of them just didnt approve 

38. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?

yeah

39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?

kind of?

40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone?

no

41. Have you had sex so far this year?

heh

42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander?

i dunno

43. How long was your longest relationship?

a year and five months i believe?

44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?

one

45. How many people did you kiss in 2012/2013?

zero

46. How many times did you have sex last year?

heh

47. How old are you?

20

48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?

well i dont like anyone soooo

49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?

welp

50. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?

i mean were still friends so i’d accept the apology but tell her to return the presents 

51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for?

i mean there are people i would do anything for but no one in a romantic sense

52. Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Why?

yes, because i couldnt do all the work and they werent going to change 

53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?

this doesnt apply to me

54. Is there someone you will never forget?

there are many people i will never forget

55. Share a relationship story.

we broke up because she loves chemistry while i hate it and she hates math while i love it most of the time

well thats the story we should tell people at least lol

56. State 8 facts about your body

im short

i have long dark hair

i have small eyes

my eyes are light brown, for a korean at least

im very pale

i have ten fingers

i have two legs

i look like garbage

i ran out of things to say lol

57. Things you want to say to an ex

hey you dork lol

58. What are five ways to win your heart?

no

59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!)

ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha no, no one needs that

60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners?

well, define “partner”

61. What is the first thing you notice in someone?

it depends on the person, but their face i guess?

62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?

pay for my college tuition 

63. What is your definition of “having sex”?

uhhhhhh two people having genital on genital contact with the goal of climaxing? i dunno

64. What is your definition of cheating?

not being faithful to the person youre with

65. What is your favourite foreplay routine?

people have routines for that?

66. What is your favourite roleplay?

i dont roleplay

67. What is your idea of the perfect date?

where it ends with someone paying my college tuition

68. What is your sexual orientation?

bi

69. What turns you off?

being an ass, smoking, saying something extremely extremely stupid, i cant think of any others

70. What turns you on?

being a good kisser, suits ties and bowties are nice, playing piano, having a nice smile, neck kisses, things like that

71. What was your kinkiest wet dream?

i dont think ive had one

72. What words do you like to hear during sex?

“i’ll pay your college tuition” 

wow jk that makes it sounds like prostitution, i’d still be down or it tho 

73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you?

pay for my college tuition 

74. What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for?

a nice face? i dunno

75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you?

i dunno

76. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone?

i dunno, i havent done much

77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships?

i used to go by the high school rule but now i dont think you should date someone thats less than half your age plus seven

78. What’s your dirtiest secret?

one time i didnt shower for two days 

jk nah it wouldnt be a secret if i didnt put it on the internet

79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why?

i think it was- wow, almost two years ago yikes

it was insecurities mostly and stupid stuff i suppose

80. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?

a few hours ago

81. Who are five people you find attractive?

jennie

seulgi

onew

krystal

le

82. Who is the last person you hugged?

my brother i think

83. Who was your first kiss with?

s.b

84. Why did your last relationship fail?

she likes chemistry and i like math, it was always destined to fail lol

85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet?

never again, long distance relationships arent for me

[blogimhappyifyouarehappy]

70 “horrible” questions... fuck it

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? Actually it is good enough. 02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? To a good friend of mine. 03: Do you regret anything?Last year i should have been a better boyfriend. 04: Are you insecure? Yup. 05: What is your relationship status? I have a gf, who i love. 06: How do you want to die? 1- when i am old. 2-In an apocalipsis 3- In a car accident 07: What did you last eat? Tacos de machaca 08: Played any sports? I like swimming 09: Do you bite your nails? I try not, i fail. 10: When was your last physical fight? With my brother probably 1 year ago (?) 11: Do you like someone? My girlfriend 12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? yes it was horrible, don't wanna do it again 13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? Yes, just mean people who do mean stuff. 14: Do you miss someone? My grandparents. 15: Have any pets?2 dogs and 1 fish 16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? I am not sure, tired i think. 17: Ever made out in the bathroom? Yes 18: Are you scared of spiders? A little bit, i am not afraid of killing them (i don't want to) but i am afraid if they jump or disappear. 19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? Honestly yes. 20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? In the apt of my girlfriend some months ago. 21: What are your plans for this weekend? Staying home, try to play the guitar and sing a lot. 22: Do you want to have kids? How many? Yes, i don't care, i would let my partner decide after all it would be her body. 23: Do you have piercings? How many?Nop, none 24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? 3D mechanical drawing, electronics, automation. 25: Do you miss anyone from your past? I already said my grandparents, but i suppose i don't miss people who have stop talking with me. 26: What are you craving right now? Some cinammon rolls and milk 27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? Just once. 28: Have you ever been cheated on? Yup 29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?Also yes 30: What’s irritating you right now? That i feel like i am an annoying person 31: Does somebody love you? I suppose and hope so 32: What is your favourite color? Gray 33: Do you have trust issues? Yes, and i apologize for them. 34: Who/what was your last dream about? My gf cheating on me, it was horrible. 35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? My gf (i spend a lot of time with her) 36: Do you give out second chances too easily? I actually think so, yes. 37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? Forget is easier, but it is not better. 38: Is this year the best year of your life? It is just begining but i don't think so. 39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 14 40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? Yes, when i was like 6 or 7 years old 51: Favourite food? Food made with love literally tastes better. 52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? No. 53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? Wishing good nights to my friends 54: Is cheating ever okay? Absolutely not. 55: Are you mean? Yes, when people are mean to me. 56: How many people have you fist fought? For real, none. 57: Do you believe in true love?Yes 58: Favourite weather? Fresh, cloudy or with a small rain. 59: Do you like the snow? Yeessss 60: Do you wanna get married? Yes i do. 61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? In my familly everyone callse me like that, i will say yes. 62: What makes you happy? Being hugged by friends 63: Would you change your name? No, its too much trouble 64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? I am not sure 65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? Appreciate it, and tell her i am not available, and that she deserves someone more compatible. 66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? I think so, but i am not so sure 67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? A friend from high school 68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?That same friend 69: Do you believe in soulmates?Yes i do. 70: Is there anyone you would die for? I think that if my parentes werent there to intervene, probably anyone i could save but since that is not the case. Just my parents, my sister and my gf.

[skiasurveys]

sorry for all these relationship surveys, everything else sucks.

A: Who do you like and why? Connor, my boyfriend. I honestly don’t really know, the moment we met I fell instantly, like we have this strong connection. He makes me laugh really hard, which is nice. He tells me what to do ( Not in a controlling way though). We like the same shit, we know how to leave eachother alone for a bit for our “me” time so its awesome. and hes great at sex.

B: Have you ever been in love? If yes, how many times, and how do you know it was love? I am currently in love and this is my first time, before  I swore i was in love but it was just literally the “I love you” not the whole Im in love and I just want you to be happy.

C: Longest relationship you’ve ever been in, and why did it end? currently the one im in is the longest :D

D: Have you ever changed for someone, if yes, how? yeah i have, 2 times. Back in high school i tried to act diferent around him because he didn’t approve how I was. which is bullshit. and then the other time was my senior year in Highschool and I tried to get his approval so i would hide who i truly was, which is stupid. I stopped doing that. If I change for someone now, its for the better.

E: Pretend I’m you ex, what do you want to say to me? You were fucking annoying. You didn’t get a joke, you literally wasted my fucking time when I couldve been with Him. You also chased me hardcore, pretty much felt like I had to date you. You pretty much blamed me for anything that went wrong. You were always about you, and you were annoying. Thank you for ending it.

F: Have you ever been cheated on?  i dont know. My one ex, Jack was long distance and I have this strong feeling that he did cheat on me , or that he was cheating on someone with me and  I didn’t know. He did some fishy things, so yeah.

G: Have you ever cheated? No.

H: Would you date someone who’s know for cheating, if yes why? no, if i found out the person I like is a cheater or known for it, i wouldnt go for them.

I: What’s the most important part of a relationship? The trust, the friendship/bond, and the comfort. You need to trust them, and feel comfortable and also feel like youre best friends.

J: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings? Serious.

K: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on “breaks”? no. Breaks to me are just a waste of time. Its basically letting you both fuck other people and then come back and be like “nah”. I don’t do breaks. Its either were done or not.

L: How many people have you ever hooked up with? i never hooked up. I only fuck who im dating. and ive only been with one guy, which is the one im currently with.

M: What’s one thing you regret saying or not saying, doing or not doing in a previous relationship? I regret dating Dylan. It sounds fake but honestly I wish I wouldve just said No im not that into you. Because really  I wasn’t that into him but everyone told me how sweet he was, so i felt kinda like I had too?? In a way??

N: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex? kids?? KIDS?? KIDS?? WHATS WRONG WITH THAT SENTENCE ? Kids shouldnt be having sex. You shouldnt have sex until you fully understand the consequences. That being mentally and physically.

O: Do you believe in the phrase, “Age is just a number?” Why or why not? well connor is 6 years older than me, Im kinda bias. But Im 20, and he’s 26. were both adults and consenting. If they are still a minor and the other partner isn’t, it’s wrong. as long as they are both adults and consenting.

P: What about “Love at first sight”? Why or why not? No one loves someone at first sight. You might feel lust, or a connection. but not love.

Q: Turn on’s? Neck kissing, pushing me down onto a bed, making out. also like sweet sensual stuff. 

R: Turn off’s? Trump supporters, racists, expecting me to be your chef, or do everything for you, being a cunt,  minimalizing my pain. lanky people. into hardcore drugs too.

S: What do you consider a deal breaker?  Cheating. Talking shit about my friends, abusing me.

T: How do you know it’s time to end a relationship? You get this feeling where you sit back and youre like “ I just dont like them anymore” or sometimes you do but you just know you can’t be together.

U: Are you currently in a relationship? If yes, for how long? If no, how long have you been single? I am, and its going to be 9 months in  2 weeks.

V: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends? Yeah you can still be friends, of course it depends on how your relationship was and how it ended. There are exes I have that I could still be friends with and some I can’t. My recent ex and I are kinda friends but he pisses me the fuck off.

W: Do you think people should date their friends? you can, i don’t see how that is bad. My boyfriend is my best friend, so it’s like thats cool. we werent friends when we started dating though. It’s hard because it could ruin a friendship

X: How many relationships have you had? about 4 

Y: Do you think love can last forever? yeah, of course.

Z: Do you believe love can conquer all things? somethings, not everything.

1: Would you break up with someone your parents didn’t approve of? No. Unless my family was like “They are abusing you.” and there was legit shit, but not cus they didn’t like him. Lol

2: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be? “dont date him because he likes you”

3: Do you think long distance relationships can work? Why or why not? so i did one when i was in high school for like 5 months. It can work. depending on where they are. Mine was awful. It was far away. and He was 7 hours ahead of my time, so everytime we would skype it would be at weird times like 8 am or 12 am like wtf and it was jsut dumb. But they can work out!

4: What do you notice first about another person? teeth and hair cuts lol

5: Do gay, lesbians, bisexuals or transgender people bother you? of course not.

[viralhottopics]

Dr. Keith Ablow: Seventeen ways to improve your life in 2017

FILE —  (AP)

Last year, as 2016 debuted, I published, 16 ways to improve your life. The year before that, I published 15 ways to improve your life. You get the idea. The tradition continues this year, with the addition of number 17. Ive also added bits and pieces to some of the 16 items from last year, just to keep you on your toes.

New Years resolutions often lose their power so quickly and completely that they have become cliché. But there are real, easily achieved ways to positively impact your life beginning January 1.

Heres your cheat sheet of 17 for 2017. They arent in any particular order, so you can pick any one to start with. 

If you complete just five, youll notice a demonstrable improvement in your existence. But if you get through nine of them, you could remake your life.

1. Try to recall one dream you had as a kid whether it was being a poet or a rock drummer or a multimillionaire stock trader and take just a single step in that direction. So often, the ideas we had as children were good ones, and we abandoned them out of fear. The step in the direction of your childhood dream can be very modest signing up for a symposium on poetry, scheduling a single drum lesson, buying a DVD on stock trading. Even just telling two people about your quiet dream can move it forward.  Frozen dreams have a way of thawing out rapidly when you warm them just a tiny bit.

2. Think of your life story, going all the way back to infancy, as an autobiographical book that you can hold in your hands. Now, imagine which page or paragraph you are tempted to tear out and remove from the story. That page or paragraph might be the one that makes you feel profoundly sad or powerless or guilty or ashamed. Next, share it with someone who knows you well but has never heard about that event or phase in your life. Being willing to disclose the events in life we want to turn a blind eye to takes away the power those events have over us.

3. Give a meaningful gift to a friend of yours on a random day not his birthday or her anniversary or Christmas. Giving gifts on those days is fine, but that isnt the same as an unexpected, unscheduled gift. Those are the ones that feel riskier to give and have more power to bond you to others who receive them. And thats because theyre real and independent expressions of friendship, affection, admiration or love.

4. Send handwritten notes to three people you admire most in the world, no matter how powerful or famous, tell them sincerely exactly why you admire them and ask to meet for 10 minutes. Theres a real chance one of them will take you up on the offer. And that one meeting could change you, because great energy is contagious and being in the company of it can stay with you.

5. Give some amount (no matter how small) to the charity you care most about. Giving is a miracle, because it helps others while also telling your unconscious mind that yours is a life of abundance, not scarcity. And that invites more treasures into your existence.  Heres one I just gave to, which I happen to know is completely legit and does great work:  kulturecity.org.

6. Stop telling yourself you love people just because you grew up with them. This is a big one, but a really important one. Did your parents and siblings earn your love by unconditionally loving you as a child? If so, great. But if youve been wishing that had been the case and have felt unwilling to let the dream of having had unconditionally loving parents or siblings slip away, then loosen your grip. If the people you grew up with werent focused on helping you stay true to yourself, then admit it to yourself. You might stop unconsciously recruiting people just like them into your life.

7. Schedule an initial psychotherapy session. Psychotherapy is the gold standard way to begin to get to know yourself more deeply. In a world of distractions and depersonalization, it remains the technique most reliably focused on restoring your connection to your true self. Hopefully, that first session will convince you of the power of psychotherapy to change your life, and youll schedule more. No one with the financial ability to be in psychotherapy should deny himself or herself that transformational opportunity.

8. Get angry about something unfair, say so out loud and dont stand for it. Anger gets a really bad rap in our culture; its accused of everything from destroying people spiritually to causing heart attacks. But suppressed anger can be more toxic. When youre offended by something you hear about in the news or you see unfolding in your personal life, try saying so, in no uncertain terms, when youre asked about it or maybe even if you arent. For those of you who have been living lives of quiet frustration, letting yourselves be very direct and very mad about something that sincerely outrages you can start to crack the shell that has your most powerful self inside it.

9. Take two minutes to think about life as a labyrinth. Mazes are built to frustrate people and get them lost. Theyre full of dead ends designed to make people give up and call for helicopters to pluck them out. Not so with labyrinths. Labyrinths may wind this way and that way. They may take you far from where you thought you were heading. But they always, always lead to the center. And thats what life is like. Keep walking, keep your faith and life will take you where you are supposed to go. The turn toward the center could be just a few steps away, when you least expect it.

10. Try praying, at least once. If you havent prayed ever or havent prayed lately, youll discover that the act of praying for what you care deeply about has the effect of reminding you what that thing or those things really are. It also has the effect of reminding you that there is a great power in the universe that you are a part of. Theres something interesting about praying; even people who say they dont believe in God are loathe to pray for the opposite of what they really want. How come? Is it because that, underneath all that cynicism, they actually do believe?

11. Read “Franny and Zooey” by J.D. Salinger, “The War of Art” by Steven Pressfield, Self Creation by the great psychologist George Weinberg (used copies available online), “Blue Dog” by George Rodrigue, or “Fear God and Take Your Own Part,” by Theodore Roosevelt (or, even better, all five). These five volumes have the power to transform people, and I keep handing them out to patients and friends (along with please forgive the narcissism my book, “Living the Truth”).  If youre really short on time or intention, just read the Afterword to a later edition of Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, by Robert Pirsig.

12. Buy one piece of original art. It doesnt need to be expensive. It just needs to appeal to you. Why? Because art is the antidote to our sometimes sterile, technologically driven culture. It makes humanity go viral in a way that YouTube cant. It also confirms your connection to things that cant be measured like your personal vision of beauty.  A good alternative is to create a piece of art.  Just be sure to buy yourself the proper brushes or paints or glue or wood to create it.  That will be a signal to yourself that you value what you are manifesting.

13. Watch the movie “Miracle,” with Kurt Russell. This film about the 1980 U.S. Olympic mens hockey team defeating Russias team is so good, it can convince you to take on the next great challenge in your life. I dont know anyone who has watched it and been unaffected by it.  Also watch the closing argument by Paul Newman at the end of the film “The Verdict,” the scene of Sylvester Stallone and Talia Shire on the beach in “Rocky III,” the monologue by Al Pacino toward the end of the film “The Scent of a Woman” and any performance of God Bless the USA by Lee Greenwood.  They can help make you a better person.  No kidding.

14. Tell your romantic partner one thing you would find exciting that you have not yet told that person. In my experience as a therapist, Ive found that people can remain strangers to one another, in terms of passion, even after 10 or 20 years of marriage. We keep sexual secrets. Let one out. You can write it down and pass it to your partner as a note, like we did back in grade school, before cell phones.  You can text it using a confidential messaging app like Wickr.  See what happens. Take the risk.

15. Stand up for someone else. Youll have the opportunity in 2017. I promise. Maybe in your home. Maybe in your neighborhood. Maybe at work. Maybe online. Defending someone will reassure that person and empower you.

16. Take 17 minutes to pretend that you are speaking to yourself, from the heart, as though you are your own ideal parent.  You can do this out loud, if you have the stage presence, or silently.  An ideal parent is empathetic, but honest in assessing his child and giving that child advice.  Sit yourself down, get very quiet and, then, tell yourselfwith the same care you would summon for a son or daughtertwo things you really admire about yourself and one very limiting, very disappointing thing about yourself you really wish you would try to change, because it could limit the whole rest of your life.  That one thing should be so searingly on-target and so necessary that it has the power to make you angry, make you anxious, bring you to tears or bring you to your knees.  Focusing about twice as long (say, 10 minutes) on the admirable qualities is something youd do for your kid, to take the sting out of the next 7 minutes, so do that for yourself.  And keep in mind that 17 minutes is a long time. Youll be tempted to avoid it or shorten it. But, you shouldnt.

17.  If you are a parent, resolve to mimic a habit I stumbled upon, when my kids were younger.  It really helps me stay balanced during times that might, otherwise, cause me lots of stress.  Here it is:  Whenever I get a phone call or an email or a text from someone telling me a project of mine or a goal or a relationship has hit a rough patch, I tell myself, silently, Yeah, well this isnt like a pediatrician calling me. What I mean is that, short of bad news about a child of mine, coming from a pediatrician (or, if your kids are older, like mine, an internal medicine doctor), nothing can really rock me. Because all of us parents know exactly how much time we would have for what seem like the big problems of our day or our week, if the phone rang, and a doctor on the other end said something like, Can I ask where you are? Because Ive seen your son, and I have something serious to talk with you about.  Id like you to come in.  Id have no time for all my other so-called problems, and neither would you.  So, things are actually better than we actually realize, most all of the time.

So, there are your 17 keys to making 2017 a transformational year.  I give them to you with the certain knowledge that you still have, inside you, all the wonderful potential you did the very first day you were born.  You havent lost one bit of it.  Its all there, just waiting for you to discover it.

Dont delay. Start on the list January 1, and by this time next year, God willing, youll be ready for the 18 steps for 2018. Life is like that: a never-ending process of self-improvement.

Dr. Keith Ablow is a psychiatrist and member of the Fox News Medical A-Team. 

Read more: http://fxn.ws/2iBzmPc

from Dr. Keith Ablow: Seventeen ways to improve your life in 2017