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|still trapped inside your own walls| . . b3313 was a lot of fun and its something that i still pull up every once in a while to play around in and find places ive never been before. highly recommended if sm64 has a special place in your heart.

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got my wii back everyone celebrate

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author’s notes today: hey guys so just a warning there isn’t 100% explicit verbal consent even though they’re both really into it so remember this is FICTION, also they don’t use a condom :((( but in real life safe sex is important!!! please be safe out there everyone

a/n back in the day: kept thinking about ____ stabbing knives through both of _____’s hands to pin him in place while they fucked so here you go lol =P

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Guys?

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my cat Meatball’s hanukkah sweater started kinda coming off, so my girlfriend went to fix it, and as she did so she said to him, in her most tender and maternal voice, “aww, is your shirt coming off? whore”

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Clench your assholes lads we’re on the hunt for pirates

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Happy 35 years of The Legend of Zelda!

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i figured it out

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Link’s Houses Graded By How Liveable They Are

The Legend of Zelda/The Adventure of Link: 0/10, he doesn’t have one. Probably sleeps in caves.

A Link to the Past/Oracle games/Link’s Awakening: 6/10, surprisingly good! He’s got a bed, a place to cook food, tables and chairs, and even a set of shelves! He looses points because there’s no space for his uncle to live and it’s only one room.

Ocarina of Time/Majora’s Mask: 5/10, similar to the previous Link. He has a bed, a table with stools. While lacking any method of cooking, that’s probably for the best seeing as everything is made of wood. He also has a sink with a mirror. He looses a point due to the random hay and pitchforks though.

Four Swords: 0/10, he has no house.

The Wind Waker/Phantom Hourglass: 4/10, while you might expect it to be higher, there are a number of flaws with his house. First is the fact that he must share it with his grandmother and little sister, and second is the lack of mattresses on their two beds. They also use their space poorly, as out of three areas in the house only one is being actively used — Grandma should have let Link use that loft as his bedroom. It’s not all bad though— they have a cooking fire and kitchen area.

Four Swords Adventures: 0/10, also has no house.

The Minish Cap: 7/10, the only truly multi-room house on this list! The bedroom has a bed for both Link and his grandfather, along with a table and stools. The main room downstairs is the kitchen, with a place to cook and shelves for plates and bowls. There’s also an entire forge connected to the building.

Twilight Princess: 10/10, the best house on this list in my opinion. Like in Ocarina of Time, there is a pitchfork inside, but this time it makes sense with Link’s background, and comes with some horse riding equipment for Epona. His cooking area is also set up to avoid any fires. He even has a sink for his dirty dishes, along with a table and chairs, and a few bookshelves. He also has a basement that he uses to store a bit of cash and some old furniture. The one flaw of this house is the lack of a bed, but this can be excused as Ordon is based in part on traditional Japanese culture, so he may just use a futon.

Spirit Tracks: 7/10, like an improved version of the ALttP house, with a bed for both Link and Niko, along with a cooking area, and plenty of room.

Skyward Sword: 8/10, rather than living in a house, this Link lives in the Knight’s Academy. He shares a divided room with another student. The only Link to have easy access to a bathroom, which counts for a lot.

A Link Between Worlds/Triforce Heroes: 5/10, very similar to his house in ALttP, containing a bed, table with stools, shelves, and a cooking area. While the lack of an uncle with no bed might have brought this house up to a higher standard, there’s one thing preventing that — the presence of a certain merchant who pushes all the furniture aside to set up his own shop.

Breath of the Wild: 7/10, a decent house brought down by the lack of a kitchen and the fact you have to buy it and the furniture inside at exorbitant prices from an annoying builder who sits around in your front garden once he’s done.

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Adult Transgender Legislative Risk Map, November 2024

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me: hey send me a zelda to that post

you: what

me: you know a zelda? like the address bar but clickable text?

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Sequal to this

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Otters will forever be the most dramatic creatures on the planet🦦