#youre also such an important and amazing and lovely and- JUST ALL ROUND GREAT MEMBER OF THE COMMUNITY AND A GREAT FRIEND AND- !!!!!!

[welcometothejianghu]

Welcome to another round of W2 Tells You What You Should See, where W2 (me) tries to sell you (you) on something you should be watching. Today's choice: 君子盟/A League of Nobleman

A League of Nobleman is the unfortunately translated English title of a 2023 historical drama about an idealistic country boy/genius detective/noodle seller, and a wealthy minister on a mission to exonerate his late father from charges of treason, even if he himself has to commit some treason in the process.

I watched this one not too long after it came out, and I was expecting there would be a lot of buzz as soon as fandom got hold of it. There wasn't, but I can understand why. The show is a lovely, ethereal drama that has some genuinely moving moments, stunning visuals, and charming character interactions.

It is, however, kiiiiiiiind of a hot mess.

What follows is an incredibly qualified rec. Unlike most of the previous shows I've recommended, this show is not something you could just throw at your Average American Television Enjoyer. Censorship got its claws into this one, and what's left is ... okay, imagine fliming all of Hannibal just like you want it, and then right before it airs, NBC comes in and says, okay, now we're just going to take out all the parts that are gay and violent and gory! You know what you'd have left? You'd have a League of Nobleman, is what.

(If you want a little more explanation of what's awkward about it, here's a take based on the first ten episodes. Note that not everything that bothers AvenueX bothers me, but they're fair critiques.)

Therefore, I'd have a tough time recommending this to someone who hasn't already built up a tolerance for the experience of seeing a scene end nearly mid-sentence, or hearing described something that happened just offscreen (while seeing no one's lips move). You need to be prepared to look through the jank to see the show we could have had beneath the show that actually arrived.

Even so, I have five reasons I think you should at least give it a shot!

1. That precious baby boy

Look at him. Look at his precious face. Don't you just want to stuff him down the front of your shirt and take him home with you?

That is Zhang Ping. He is the hero and he is a good boy.

He is a darling dumpling who grows up reading novels about how members of the judiciary nobly solve crimes and punish the unjust, so he decides that he wants to move to the big city and become a member of the judiciary to nobly solve crimes and punish the unjust! ...Until he gets there and realizes, no, baby, that was fiction. But gosh darn it, he's going to try anyway.

I have seen people say they read Zhang Ping as autistic. While I'm not sure that's specifically what the show itself was going for, that's kind of the effect -- which, I think, is why I've also seen a lot of people say they don't like Song Weilong's performance. I don't think he's wooden or unemotional; I think he just made a choice to play the character as not always real good about understanding why the people around him are having the emotions they're having. Similarly, I think what makes him read as anachronistic is mostly how he doesn't engage well with the rules of social convention that are such important parts of this historical setting.

Like, you see that picture above, with him and Lan Jue whispering at one another? Zhang Ping is doing this because he is absolutely convinced that this is appropriate subterfuge behavior. Lan Jue is matching him because he thinks Zhang Ping is adorable.

Just the goodest boy. A baby. Please care him.

2. the aesthetic

The show is beautiful. It looks and sounds amazing. For some reason I can't find a clip of just the opening credits, but here's a (strangely bloody) trailer that gives a sense of its general vibe:

As you can see a couple times in there, the show makes great use of tilt-shift photography -- you know, the thing where you change the focal length until everything starts to look fake? It creates a weird, dreamlike effect where parts of the frame are out of focus for no reason, or actual locations start to look like model-train miniatures. Many of the shots are framed like this, giving the entire thing a very pretty, very uncanny look.

And speaking of the dreamlike: If there's one thing I've come to expect from C-dramas, it's bad CGI. That is not the case here! The CG is used so sparingly that it's unobtrusive and actually quite nice. Much more of the weight of the show's look relies on practical effects that are supported and amplified by CG, which is the optimal combo. When it does go all in on CG, it's in the service of dreamscapes that are supposed to look unreal anyway.

The show does admittedly have a mild problem of using a cool effect and then largely forgetting that effect exists. For example, the first episode has a really neat "freeze time and walk through a crime scene" bit! And then we barely ever see that ability again. But the show's doing so many other lovely things that you don't really feel the absence until you stop to think about it all later. So don't stop to think about things! That's my motto! (It really isn't.)

The directors also just have a lovely eye for things -- which is extra-surprising considering that both of them are first-time directors. That can be fun, though, when you get people who haven't gotten stuck in their ways get, so they're still being new and weird with it. ...Of course, I bet that's also some of why so much of the show quite obviously got cut to ribbons, if you're also working with directors who also haven't figured out how to get away with things just yet.

Overall, the production values are very high. This show clearly had a fairly solid amount of funding behind it, but it also used its resources smartly. Most costumes are elegant but not extravagant. Detailed sets are small and beautiful locations are contained. While I have great respect for productions that try to create epics on a shoestring budget, there's something to be said for a project that sets its sights on the achievable, then puts its effort into doing what it can, well.

3. A ship for everyone!

There are so many potential ways to pair up them boys. The show's main pair dynamic is between country mouse Zhang Ping and city mouse Lan Jue, but it surely does not stop there. In fact, I've made a helpful chart that shows you all the potential flavors of gay you can enjoy at this particular danmei buffet:

(And yes, if you've seen the show, you know there's at least one more line that I could've drawn here, but I don't want to spoil anything.)

Now, whether you do read any of these dynamics as sexual/romantic is up to you. The point is that you could. For example, I personally am not that into Lan Jue/Xu Dong, but if you lose your shit when a competent sword guy owes a life debt to the defenseless noble he works for? You could have a lot of fun with what the show gives you.

Obviously, because this is a censored c-drama, there are no canon gay romances. However, a couple of them are more textual than others, especially the ones that center Lan Jue, because everyone clearly wants a piece of that fancy flat ass.

One of AvenueX's comments from the video I linked earlier is that the main couple has less sparkle together than each of them has individually with the man that's supposed to be his bestie. While that changes as the show goes on, these two side pairs never cease to be enjoyable. Whether you read them as sexual or not is up to you! Romantically or platonically, they're still a delight to watch bounce off of one another.

And Lan Jue/Gu Qingzhang (that one terrible ex from the chart) is, uh, basically textual? It's miles into "there is no straight explanation for this" territory. Again, avoiding spoilers here, but trust me. You get to see their secluded love nest and everything. Shit's real gay.

Then, of course, there's the main pair:

This is clearly the one that got hit real hard by cuts to the material. It's a damn shame, because this is clearly meant to be the core of the whole narrative. Despite that, the two of them have a fascinating dynamic that changes over the series from outright suspicion to cautious care to absolute trust. It's a great combo of someone who is too honest for his own good and someone so used to court politics that he lies as easily as breathing.

Ironically, the source material is Not Gay, to the point where the author has basically disowned this series as being so different from her original work as to be unrecognizable. You sort of have to wonder about the creative thought processes that led to taking a gen work and deciding to BL it up for the live-action adatation. I'm not complaining, mind you, but it is a little bit of an unforced error.

So whatever flavor of gay it is you're into, the odds are very good that this drama will have at least enough of it to keep you interested!

4. A very charming cast

I got to gush about Song Weilong's Zhang Ping earlier, but honestly I think everybody's pretty enjoyable, from the main cast to the recurring side characters to the one-off extras who show up for a single episode. Everybody's playing it weird and theatrical, so I get it if that's not your cup of tea. However, I feel all the performances are well-suited to the slightly surreal style of the production.

Here's just a couple of the real gems:

Jing Boran's Lan Jue has the perfect regal bearing of a fussy gentleman, but with a very endearing softness underneath. He spends half his time with eyes brimming with unshed tears, and the other half making heart-eyes at his boyfriends. You understand why everybody in the empire wants to ride him like they stole him, and that's even before he lets his hair down and starts dressing in slutty sheer robes. (I'm not entirely sure either he or the show knew how to play the character in the first few episodes, but he gets way better once he stops being so sinister and mysterious and gets to be cute and/or unhinged.)

There is one female character who shows up in more than one arc, and she is the Empress Dowager, and she is such a wonderful awful bitch. What a monster. Shi Yueling eats up every scene she's in by being the perfect mix of reprehensible and fascinating.

I was already primed to like Wang Duo because I liked watching him be a pretty snake boy in Yin-Yang Master: Dream of Eternity. Well, now he gets to be a pretty metaphorical snake boy here. I'm not spoiling anything by telling you he's bad news. He shows up damn near the end of the show and you know immediately he's bad news. But you don't know what kind of bad news he is, and that's fun to find out.

And speaking of actors I already liked from other places! Guo Cheng has mastered the art of acting with his mouth full. His Chen Chou is a sweet, earnest anchor in a world of tricksy boys.

There is something about Hong Yao's handsome face that makes Wang Yan perpetually look a little red-eyed, like he's trying hard to pretend that he wasn't just crying in his office. It's the perfect soft touch to his incredibly wonderful chad of a character. I'm usually not into the cocky jocks, but I will make such an exception for him.

I love you, fortune-telling gremlin grandpa.

5. Raw materials

Look, I assume if you've made it this far in the rec and you're still hanging on, you're interested for one of two reasons. The more normie reason is that you're into c-dramas in general (and probably period dramas in particular), and gay stuff is a selling point, so you see the appeal of turning on a drama where cute boys have emotions at other cute boys. That is a perfectly good reason to watch this drama, and if this is you, I hope you have fun!

The other reason is that you like making fan stuff, and you need some new blorbos to blorb in new and exciting combinations. Friend, I have that stuff for you right here.

A League of Nobleman has problems -- but they are problems that may be appealing to people who enjoy fixing things. There are literal holes in the series where actual, planned, filmed scenes were deleted! If you're looking for source material that's just begging you to fill in the gaps, look no further.

Of course I'm partial to the number of queer DIY romance options there are (see point 3), but that's not the extent of it. The setting is fascinating: an unspecified premodern Chinese dynasty magical enough to have a Bureau of Incantations, where the emperor is (for once) a cool dude, secluded village people live in semi-communal families, and one of the main characters can play Inception with people's heads. I'll say it plainly: If you are into kinky dream sex, this is the drama for you.

I should note that one of the things that doesn't need fixing is the overall shape of the series. The individual little case incidents seem disconnected, but they all weave together at the end as part of a (let's be real, ridiculously complicated) plot, giving the whole thing a pretty satisfying wrap-up. The show does not just fall off a cliff like Moriarty; it resolves in a way that's more than a little convoluted, but still overall satisfying. Also, a lot of those ships from the chart above, when it's all over, are still together. Some days that's all you need from an ending.

Maybe I sound like a broken record at this point, but to give you a sense of how heavy the hand of censorship clearly was, understand several of these episodes don't even break the 35-minute mark, and only four are even over 40 minutes long, when ~45 minutes is about the episode standard for this genre. (For comparison, every Untamed episode at least 42 minutes long.) I think it's important to realize just how much actual connective tissue got removed, way more than just individual censored shots or single redubbed lines.

And speaking of redubbed lines, the last episode of this show contains possibly the funniest NO HOMO in BL history. You have to see it to believe it -- or, rather, to not believe it, because the first time I watched, I didn't even understand what the hell the show was implying. I'll say no more.

Where to watch it!

I hope I've convinced you to at least give it a try! It's not a perfect show by any means, but it's a show with many good elements, and if you can embrace what's there without getting too hung up on what's not, it's a pretty good time.

If you're up for it, you can find it on this YouTube playlist -- though be prepared that it often mutes the opening music. It's also available on Viki (with ads, but less muting).

Just look at those precious, pinchable cheeks. Adorable.

[aestheticvoyage2023]

Day 145: Thursday May 25, 2023 - “Cheese The Day”

Home now, and the house feels different.  We still say goodnight to Havarti as part of our bedtime routine, but its to his ashes and footprint.  But its not the only thing keeping him alive in our home this week. Audrie is also convinced that a daily visitor in our backyard garden is some embodiment of his energy and its bringing her comfort.  A beautiful orange Cheesy dragonfly.  Its come every day and hangs out, and Audrie is looking for it every morning.  He is still with us, in so many ways.  Such a great dog. Such an important member of our family.  We feel the void where his steady paws and constant love used to sit.

Audrie wrote her reflections on his recent passing:

Havarti There are no words. Death is cruel, harsh, sudden—even when we all know it is coming. The pain sinks deep and you know that this grief will now become a part of you and all the rest of your own existence. Death is forever more. And it’s only fair to acknowledge that death’s harshness is so sharp and deep because of love. Love makes us grieve. Love is what pulls the tears down and rises the lumps in our throats. Love is what causes the emptiness that death creates. It’s all about the love that started in the space of forever before the death.  Love is longer than death. Havarti transitioned over his rainbow bridge on Saturday evening. At home. And it was sudden, and we have to think it was just what he wanted and chose and in his terms. A weekend day when I was away working, after William’s bedtime and good night routine, and cuddled by Jake in our family bed. We’ve been collecting and cherishing what we knew were his final years and months and weeks and days and hours for a long time now. I remember when Havarti closed out his 12th and rounded into the 13th year I wondered if we would be celebrating another. And we did. This amazing being blessed me with 14.5 years. Pretty incredible for the tiny, sick, Tucson-purebred-tan-hound I brought home from the shelter a little more than fourteen years and four months ago.  He weighed only 10 lbs then and was swaddled like a baby in a blue towel. To know the Cheese-Dog was to love him. He was special. He was unique. He was the best of the best a human could ever expect to find in a four legged furry companion. Havarti was graceful and dignified, he was humerus and kind, he was protective and intelligent, he was loving and loyal, he was patient and gentle — he was our very best good boy. And for many years he was my everything. Nine years ago we became a trio, when Jake joined our family. We three Amigos had some serious adventures together. From Beal Street to the Big Sky’s of Wyoming, this dog got to travel. He crossed more state lines in his 14 years than many adult will see in their entire lifetime, it got hard to track after 10 but we think he saw 16 state lines in total. He’s laid witness to the Colorado River flowing from Grand Canyon’s edge, Old Faithful rising her waters on a clear blue day, soaked in the yellow glory of Maroon Bells breathing crisp autumn air, watched the sunset over Snake River with the Tetons nipped in bright white snow above, and he got rolled by the waves in the soft sands and crystal cold waters of the Western Mitten. Havarti was the best older brother, and he leaves behind a piece of his legacy in his two living brothers — Huckleberry and William. Who both miss him immensely already. 14.5 years is a long time for a dog. And it will never seem like enough. Havarti taught me everything I could ever need to know about loving unconditionally, about nurturing others and being nurtured, about patience, about my own humanity and humility. Havarti made me an adoptive mama, and he prepared me for my journey into motherhood with a human. At the end of the life of this beautiful creature it’s hard to say who raised who. Havarti was my soul-dog-mate. No doubt the universe helped to spin us together to be on this journey side by side. For every season he has been my silent and steady best friend. Seeing me through all my formative years as an adult.   I remember the day I realized he would likely die before me. I was about 23, and he was still a puppy, and I cried all day. I realized our time was finite together. And I made him a deal to give him the very best of me, to love him every day, and cherish his life if he would promise me 15 good years. I knew I was asking too much. And at 14.5 I know he was doing all he could to hold up his end of the bargain. I remember that day wondering where I would be in my own life and journey when Havarti’s time came to pass on. And now I know. Havarti’s vet has been counseling me for years; “You won’t ever be fully prepared but you will be ready when it’s time, you will know.” He was right, and I did. And for that the pain isn’t any less. I’m in shock but I’m not shocked.   And the grief is vast. But if gratitude is the key to joy, then gratitude must also play a role in this grief. I’m so grateful Havarti. Thank you for choosing me. Thank you for your years on years of love, of patience, of grace. Thank you for your companionship. Thank you for being you alongside of me. The lump in my throat, the pit in my soul, the shatter in my heart, the warm tears I weep are all just bubbles of love and gratitude I will always hold for you. You are missed, and this is hard, and it’s hard because you were so great. I’ll see you in the sunsets, and I’ll walk with you in my dreams. And I can’t wait for your helicopter tail wags to greet me when I cross the rainbow bridge to join you again someday.

Song: Sarah McLachlan - I Will Remember You

Quote: "The easy days ahead of you will be easy. It is the hard days — the times that challenge you to your very core — that will determine who you are. You will be defined not just by what you achieve, but by how you survive. … And when the challenges come, I hope you remember that anchored deep within you is the ability to learn and grow. You are not born with a fixed amount of resilience. Like a muscle, you can build it up, draw on it when you need it. In that process you will figure out who you really are." ~Sheryl Sandberg

[theretirementstory]

Bonjour toute le monde, I am still at home and am enjoying my garden. We had three days of gorgeous weather where the temperatures reached 20c, although I was doing a lot of washing and letting it dry outside I still managed to prune my roses, clear nettles from around the paniculata and cleared out the dead leaves and weeds from the peonies.

The delicious meal at the restaurant did not disappoint, I decided to have a starter and what a cracking choice it was, tartine of chèvre chaud with a salad made with apple, pears and more cheese, it was really delicious. I then had the filet of beef with pepper sauce, gratin dauphinois and green beans plus I still had room for the delicious exotic fruits with sorbet. It was certainly worth going as I really enjoyed it all.

I had to go to the hospital for a platelet transfusion on Monday and I thought I was never going to get home! Did they not realise we were having similar to toad in the hole for dinner!

“The Photographer” and I were still busy getting my affairs in order. The one thing that was most important to me was having a funeral plan in place. We went and got the estimate and then I had an appointment on Friday for it all to be finalised. That’s it, I have the paperwork, it’s all paid for and an additional burden removed from my sons’ shoulders.

For our last meal together, “The Photographer” drove us to Buffalo Grill. I didn’t feel as hungry as I had previously and couldn’t eat all of my steak but I still managed a slice of cheesecake which was delicious.

Then it was time for “The Photographer” to leave. I was waiting for a taxi, which didn’t show, to take me to the hospital for my PET scan. The lady said it hadn’t been booked 🤔. So I spent an extra hour with him as he drove me to the hospital for the scan. It was a long day for him but he returned home safe and well and we had spent a lovely nine days together.

As I said the weather was gorgeous and so I took advantage and got all of the bedding washed (it will soon be ironed and put away). I have my bag to pack for hospital tomorrow.

Lots of messages from friends, Anie, Pauline, Monique. Maud and Claudine in France, Mary, Val, Jo, Jackie and Miranda in the UK.

My gorgeous grandchildren have been with Daddy this weekend, what little cuties they are! I got gorgeous photos of my grandson and my granddaughter was in studious mode until she knew that her uncle was coming to visit and my goodness the smile on her face when she saw him was amazing. They were both sitting on his knee, just loving being with him. My grandson was using his uncle’s girlfriend’s phone to take selfies, cheeky little chap.

“The Trainee Solicitor” is still trying to do his work and prepare the office for a new member of staff (hopefully one arrives soon). It is full on busy and boy will he be glad of a four day weekend this coming week.

“The Reconnect Navigator” has been given her own cases and feels that things are moving along. She also had her first payday which is a great day in anyone’s book.

“The Jetsetter” returned from her trip to Bologna, Venice and Florence and I know that during the stay aperol was consumed and I imagine quite a bit of pasta too. I always think it’s great to get away at this time of year as it sets you up for the summer.

My hair has fallen out big style now, I look a little like a friar with my big round bald patch in the middle of tufts of hair. As I don’t have the next round of chemo until maybe another month, I think I will be bald for sometime (I am not really liking it!)

My first piece of music this week comes from the artist I know as Terence Trent D’Arby but who is now known as Sananda Maitreya. To choose between “If You Let Me Stay” and “Sign Your Name” has proven very difficult, I am going to go with “Sign Your Name” but why not listen to them both. This song was released in 1987, wow so long ago!

The second song, has quite a haunting melody, it’s “7 Seconds” by Youssou N’Dour ft. Neneh Cherry, it was released in 1994.

Now I really must go to the supermarket, I need to get some filters for my Brita water filter (other makes are available) and I would like to buy something tasty for this evenings meal.

I will wish you all a Bon Dimanche and leave you with the photos of the spring flowers and the cherry blossom.

[daniellew150]

Things of 2023, Part 1, Books.

I enjoyed sharing this last year, so trying to make it a tradition. Managed a few more books this year, and there are some I bought but didn’t have time to read, so I guess they will make it into next year’s list. 

So let’s get into it. 

Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman: Good Omens.

Not a new one, but quite possibly one of my favourite books of all time, I think this is the third copy I’ve owned over the years. It’s fun, dark, and the characterisation is just wonderful. I always enjoyed Newt’s journey of trying to find who he really is, but I think that is probably true of all the major characters.

The adaptation on Amazon was brilliant, and season 2 has set up the finale nicely, really looking forward to finding out what Terry and Neil came up with.

Ben Aaronovitch: Rivers of London and Moon Over Soho.

Rivers of London was a recommendation from a work friend, was a great call, part supernatural thriller, part police procedural. It’s got plenty of laughs, some proper scares. The main characters are superbly rounded and made me want to read the rest of the series. Managed book two, Moon Over Soho, and it follows on brilliantly. It has plenty of ongoing themes, but with a great new mystery (or two) to deal with. Will definitely be looking at the rest of the series (I think I have another 8 books to go!). 

Hiron Ennes: Leech

Wasn’t sure if I should include this one as I haven’t finished it yet, but decided I would definitely have finished it by new year, so counts towards 2023. Very creepy and dark, with a bit of body horror but a really intriguing plot. Can’t wait to find out what happens.

Erin Morgenstern: The Night Circus.

This one didn’t make it into the picture as I’ve lent the book to someone. This was another recommendation and was mind blowing. A centuries long magical battle, which is also a love story. Not just between the protagonists, but people who they meet along the way. The description of the circus is so vivid that it really comes to life. If I get my copy back, this is one I will definitely read again and again.

Neil Gaiman: Sandman (book 1).

I’d obviously heard about this for years, and really enjoyed the Netflix series last year, so decided I should go look at the source material. Definitely worth it. Great stories and wonderful illustration. Another one where I will have to get the rest of the series at some point. 

Robin Ince: Bibliomaniac.

I’ve read a few of Robin’s books now, and I love the narrative style. This one is a tour of Britain’s bookshops (the book tour for The Importance of Being Interested that I read last year). Couple of bits that really made me chuckle, one about my home town, quoting another author as “a dull spot which even drink can’t enliven much” . Another was Shakespeare themed pun shop names (a chiropodist called Two Gentlemen of Verruca for example). 

Matt Parker: Humble Pi. 

Another one that didn’t make the photo, I was lent this one, and have now returned it. This is right up my street, stories of maths and engineering and how they can cause problems if not used properly. Feels like a book version of the Well There’s Your Problem podcast. 

Cariad Lloyd: You are not alone.

Feels reductive to call this a spin off from Cariad’s podcast, but that is definitely the starting point. A fantastic book on grief and grieving, interwoven with Cariad’s own story of her father’s death when she was a teenager. I found it so useful to process some of my own emotions around death of family members, but also other forms of grief (loss of relationships). This is an amazing resource, and remember the five steps of grief were never meant for the way they are used today.

Mattie Lubchansky: Boys Weekend.

I came across Mattie as a guest on various podcasts, and their cartoons on The Nib, so when Boys Weekend came out I ordered it immediately. A great graphic novel about navigating old friendships as a trans person, but also giving capitalism an absolute kicking. Loved it, and recently heard there will be a sequel in 2025.. stay tuned.

Julie McDowell: Attack Warning Red!

Another book from one of my favourite podcasts (Atomic Hobo). An amazingly well researched book on Civil Defence in Britain as it came out of the Second World War, and into the potential atomic horrors of the Cold War. A wonderful mix of whimsy and terrifying details. 

Jake & Hannah Graf: Becoming Us. 

I’ve read quite a few biographies of Trans people at this point, but this is two stories in one, with a proper happy ending. Reading two very different lives, but both with a common thread. A chance encounter leading to a wonderful family. It really is a book about hope. 

Munroe Bergdorf: Transitional.

Another Trans life story, but with a really interesting twist, how life is change, and everything is a transitional state in many ways. Wonderfully written with again a huge amount of joy. So many of these books have changed the way I view myself and how I approach the world, this is another one that has moved my mindset again. 

Garbage: This is the noise that keeps me awake.

A proper coffee table book. A lovely object, that charts the history of one of my favourite bands. Garbage mean a lot to me, they are one of the groups that helped me realise I could be myself. I love the inclusion of the band cocktail recipes. 

James Hetfield: Messengers, The Guitars of James Hetfield.

As a Metallica fan, and a guitarist this is a fantastic book. Some band history, some truly fantastic photography and just some wonderful guitars. Will always love the ESP V with the Hot Rod flames, but seeing an authentic 1958 Gibson Explorer is brilliant. 

[jsms01]

3 real mums and their Today Show 12 Week Challenge!

Three super-excited mums kicked off 2023 with an appearance on the Today Show for the start of our 12 Week Challenge – that’s national tv for your before shots! We have never followed any mum’s experience so closely for the entire challenge, and it has been a great journey of discovery for us and the mums! Here are the mums who share their very authentic and personal journeys. Adriana and Sharmin were completely new to The Healthy Mummy, whereas our amazing mum of six Jess Magill has been an active Healthy Mummy member during her previous 3 pregnancies. Each woman has her own motivators for embarking on the 12 Week Challenge and couldn’t wait to get started. Adriana wanted to join us as she was feeling exhausted all the time. This super busy mum of two just wanted to feel energised so she wasn’t asleep on the sofa before 9pm each night! Life is especially busy right now for Adriana and her family as they are renovating, she has just started her own Yellow Brick Road brokerage and overall just wanted to achieve more with her family and her work and feel in control. Adriana told us before she started, “I want a clearer mind to achieve more out of work and life! I also want to look in the mirror and see myself like the picture of myself that I have in my head, all I see is a round face at the moment.” Sharmin is a mum of one who has lost weight before but wants to learn how to maintain her weight loss and really ‘live’ a healthy and fit lifestyle and be a great role model for her daughter, Sophia. Sharmin’s goals are to achieve and maintain a good fitness level, to feel energised and happy, but also to ensure a good quality of life as she gets older. “Weight itself is important and I am focussed, but I think for me it’s more about fitting into my favourite clothes and also setting a good example for my daughter.” Jess is someone that lots of mums already know and love as she’s a beautiful, funny and inspirational mum of six! Jess is just like every other mum who wants the energy to play and keep up with her kids but knows it takes planning to allow for ‘you time’ amongst all the chaos. “I need to be healthy and strong both physically and mentally to keep myself on top of my busy life.” Jess believes that a healthy lifestyle and planning help her take some time for herself, “which makes me better for my family but also helps me be a good role model for my kids,” Jess told us. These mums all joined the 28 Day Weight Loss challenge with amazing positive attitudes and excitement. They all had their own personal goals, challenges and different motivations, but overall these three mums wanted to feel better for themselves and for their families. For our mums that had not used The Healthy Mummy program or getting started with our app might have been daunting, but let’s be honest, a commitment to set yourself up and become familiar with how it all works was not tricky at all. The new mums loved The Healthy Mummy app and realised the technical side of things was easy with the app, the meal plan, the shopping and the cooking but shifting your mindset was the real challenge. Sharmin and Adriana agreed that setting up the app for themselves was straightforward. “I gave myself time to quietly set myself up and figure out how it all worked, and honestly, I was surprised how easy it was and from there, I just had to get my head completely into the food, exercise and shifting my bad habits,” Adriana said. All the girls loved so many of the recipes and their customised meal plans and started swapping out what meals were best for their families. They were working out with the kids, preparing meals ahead of time to ensure they stayed on track and found the community for inspiration and honest and helpful support. But just like most of us, the mums did have some hiccups as it was not easy to shift unhealthy habits, start to exercise and prepare healthy meals. You do need discipline and commitment, but most of all, they realised that you do need to take some time for yourself to get planning and get your head in the right place to make a change and allow yourself to succeed. Sharmin thought that this is where the amazing mums of our online community really shone for her, “The Healthy Mummy online FB community is so motivating when you can see all the other mums having great success, it really did inspire me.”

So where are they now?

Adriana, Sharmin and Jess all lost kg’s and cm’s and are super happy with their results from the 12 Week Challenge and are looking to start the next one on the 1st of May. Adriana, Sharmin and Jess Adriana has lost 6kgs and is under 100kg for the first time in as long as she can remember and she is feeling physically and emotionally positive. Whilst she had a few challenges along the way, Adriana feels good that each time she got back into the app, she remembered why she started and got cooking. “I’ll be doing the next challenge for sure and I’m confident that I can reach my 90kg goal weight before summer.” Adriana’s advice: Is to really recognise that this program and the changes you are making are for the long term as this is a lifestyle not a diet or weight loss program. I am sure that the changes I’ve made will help to influence my kids to make good food choices (with treats in moderation) and enjoy exercise and being healthy!” Sharmin has lost 7.5kgs and is on track to her 10kg overall weight loss goal and is feeling positive and excited to get back into her lovely clothes. Sharmin is a great cook and has a few favourite recipes from the app and even has her daughter asking for treats to take to school. Sharmin shared her favourite recipes from The Healthy Mummy app. She said “Healthy Chocolate Chip Banana Bread and the Sweet Potato Shepherd’s Pie are both so delicious and faves with my family, and I do manage to control my portions (that’s the tricky thing!!)” Jess has lost 6kg throughout this 12 Week Challenge and is loving feeling strong and fit and fitting into her pre-baby jeans. The Healthy Mummy community loves Jess as she is the master of budget cooking, meal prepping, healthy eating and understanding what she needs to stay on track. She is active in supporting and motivating other mums in our online community with her honest posts and sharing her food and cooking tips.

Jess’s Day on a plate

- Breakfast: Skim flat white + Blueberry Breakfast Muffins (app recipe) + Yopro pouch (comes to under 400 calls) - Morning tea: Healthy Mummy Smoothie with banana, spinach, peanut butter, almond milk and ice - Lunch: Rice cakes with ham and salad or tuna and avo, or Cheesy Egg Broccoli Muffins (from my meal plan in the app) - Afternoon tea: Skim flat white + The Healthy Mummy snack bar or the Healthy Choc Chip Banana Bread or another The Healthy Mummy smoothie - Dinner: I have my smaller portion with steamed veggies on the side. Faves are; Sausage and Veggie Pasta Bake, Devilled Sausages, Chicken Tikka Koftas, Stovetop Lasagna - Dessert: Healthy Mummy Protein Custard, fruit, greek yoghurt with smoothie mix or muesli, Caramel Oat Slice Note: Jess has a higher calorie allocation (2200) as she is breastfeeding and exercising 5 days a week. The consensus with all the mums was that the program is definitely doable and the app is easy to use and the recipes are delicious. Stay tuned for more tips from our three mums and more about their journey so far! Source link Read the full article

[pahariroutes]

Explore The Colors Of Nature In Himachal Pradesh With A Local Taxi Service In Dharamshala

Dharamshala is one of the popular places to visit in India. You can visit the place with friends or family to enjoy your time. If you are a solo traveller, then you can travel to Dharamshala to have a great time. Especially this place is the perfect choice to visit during the summer. If you love snow, then you can visit when it's snowing like during the month of January. You can also visit during any part of the year except the monsoon season.

In an unknown place, to make the holiday extra special you should find proper accommodation and travel options. Booking the local taxi service in Dharamshala will help you get an unforgettable journey and explore the beauty of the tourist spots. Here you can find many amazing tourist spots which you can explore.

Know that one of the best ways to explore the places comfortably is by booking a taxi service in Dharamshala. While booking the taxi services, you will find that there is a wide range of vehicle options to choose from for your ride. Hence, based on your need you can book a taxi for your regular ride, an outstation cab or an airport cab.

How to find the local taxi service in Dharamshala?

The local taxi service in Dharamshala is easily available in many agencies in the market. Hence all you need is to look for the best agency where you can find the best taxi services. You can book the services online or by contacting them. You can find all types of services at the agency hence just make sure that you choose the best agency where you can get reliable services.

You can travel to many nearby places here in Dharamshala with taxi services. Whether it’s a round or single-way trip, you can look for a trusted partner for smart navigation. You can have a comfortable ride with professional drivers and on-time services with the taxi service in Dharamshala.

Booking the taxi service is easier and simple at the right travel agency. Just make sure that you offer the right pick-up location, date and time so that they can offer the right services. You can book a taxi service in Dharamshala for airport transfer. The vehicles will be cleaned every day and hygiene will be maintained to ensure the safety of the people.

Planning is of utmost importance since it will help you have a comfortable ride always. If you book the taxi services at the occasion time then you may also get offers to save money. Whether you are looking for SUVs or economical vehicles, you can find them in the agencies.

Through proper research,you can find the best travel agency. You can check the reviews about the agency on Google and also ask about the agency with your friends or family members. In this way, you will be able to choose the best agency for your local taxi service in Dharamshala.

[sonsband]

Hii!!! It’s me, xuseokgyu, your Atiny secret Santa ehehe

I’m so glad you liked the gifset, I had such a great time looking for these little moments <33

Is kinda late so I can’t ramble much but I can come back to it if you want, just know that the ballet was GREAT

And oh wow that’s HUGE, the Vatican?? Have you already received a proper answer if you’ll be able to go?

I’m agnostic myself, I don’t really have a religion but I can’t say I don’t believe in some kind of higher power whatever that is… Would you mind sharing your dad’s story??

Anyway, if you’d like to take this to dms so is less exposing hahah I’m always open to chat 🥰

DMs, asks, everything's all good! I'd love to keep connected! also, is your username a combo of Seventeen members?

it's SO cute they're such little menaces. poor Seonghwa getting hit with the most antics.

I'd love to hear everything you want to share! was it a traditional performance? I love the long skirts in Giselle, I think the fabric makes the movements more dramatic and more beautiful. but on the other hand, there are so many good choreographers reinterpreting ballet recently that are amazing.

the annoying thing is that I'm good to go on their side, but the ops manager can't decide what days she wants off... like the Vatican in its massive bureaucracy has said I can be there and visit the apartments, it's a 24 year old that's cockblocking me now. it's SO important to our family (even though my dad's divorced and I'm gay, but whatever) and it's frustrating that the request has to wait on her.

I believe in the recovery idea of a higher power for sure but that's kind of where I leave it lmao

yeah, I'm so insanely proud of him I'll brag all the time lmao. in his second round with cancer the tumor was all tangled in and around a bunch of nerves. the damage from the surgery was bad, he lost use of a leg and a hand, and the doctors told him he might be reliant on a wheelchair or a brace/crutches for the rest of his life, and he told them it was cute they thought that but he'd be back on his feet. when I told my mom he'd done it, she sighed "if anyone could will himself out of paralysis, it's your dad." (obligatory statement to make it extra obvious: there was a ton of luck on top of his hard work, it's not a matter of ~not working hard enough~ that people use mobility devices)

anyway, I hope you're doing well and having a great last few days of 2022! (can you even believe????)

[ulatorsa]

Walk through any toy store and you will see walls and walls of toys

"Walk through any toy store and you will see walls and walls of toys that are loud -- toys that require batteries, have flashing lights, or that look like your child's favorite movie character. What is there for parents who want to raise children with imagination and curiosity? I'll tell you what we do. We choose to fill our houses with the following old-fashioned items.

Books

No house can have enough books. Make sure your house has a representation of great fiction Books and non-fiction books. A mix of the two is very important.

Most homes have a deficit of non-fiction books, so make sure your home is filled with Science, History and Art books. Children need to learn to read and appreciate non-fiction books in order to do well in research when they reach higher levels of study.

Felt Boards

Children love to tell stories with felt. You'll need a felt board to start. You can make your own board from a sheet of felt or purchase a board.

Once you have the board, let the fun begin.

StoryTeller, at felt4fun , has a great line of products -- felt sets, felt books, and so much more. The quality of their products is excellent. Visit their site to get a sample and feel the thick felt yourself. Be sure to check out the dolls with the felt clothing that sticks to them. My daughter loves these!

Also, go to a craft or fabric store and buy sheets of felt in all colors. Then, cut out shapes in all colors and sizes. (You'll be amazed at how quickly a child will make an alien, ship, house, or person out of nothing but a few circles, rectangles, and triangles.)

Blocks and Legos

Children can play for hours building towers, bridges, cities, creatures, and more with these toys that inspire creativity, patience, and small-motor skills. When the masterpiece is finished, have your child pretend to be a giant and smash through the blocks!

Art Supplies

Give your child some crayons, scissors, junk mail, and glue. He or she will be entertained for hours if given encouragement. Please SUPERVISE closely if you don't want your child to have a self-induced bad haircut or attach the dog to her artwork!

Puppets

Make puppets out of socks, paper bags, felt, cloth, or popsicle sticks. Make a stage and tell stories. Get out the video camera and capture your child's brilliance!

Musical Instruments

Whether your musical instruments are home-made with a comb and wax paper or store bought, making music is a wonderful way to spend the day. Teach your child that music can be made from anything, from an old oatmeal container, to scratching air control valve two pieces of sandpaper together. Go on a walk and just listen to the sounds of the world -- music is everywhere in our lives.

Dress-up Clothes

Get out old prom dresses, big hats, shirts and ties, old Halloween costumes (or buy extra pieces after Halloween for year-round fun!). Bring out a box of costumes and watch the shows that your children put on for you. Keep a camera handy to capture the fun. Also, keep an eye on the pets. Cats don't always appreciate wearing a sombrero. Trust me, I have the scars to prove it!

Doll-houses

There is nothing more fun than watching your child make up stories as the family members move around in a doll house. Plus, if it is a wooden dollhouse, there is the added benefit of decorating it with some wallpaper scraps and carpet remnants! Your dollhouse could be a family heirloom if you put enough love into it.

In the Kitchen

Kids love to play Kitchen, when it is mixing air, or getting to play with food. Give your child a great time by giving them safe kitchen utensils to play with in the bathtub. Mixing, pouring, and scooping bubbles and water entertains my children long enough for them to look pruny. Or for a fun alternative, give them puffed rice cereal and some bowls and utensils on the kitchen floor. Just plan to vacuum afterwards as there'll be quite a wonderful mess!

[casual-flower]

Ina I have been losing my mind over the ask you sent me I haven’t even been able to post it yet II just keep opening it and giggling like a crazy person. I wanted to try to return a tiny bit of the joy you brought me today and while I’ve never written Obey Me before I tired to throw together a little something for you and I hope you enjoy it!!! You’re such an important and talented member of our fandom and I think your amazing!! ♥️

The room felt stuffy. Ina felt like she’d been reading the same line repeated times and not retaining a single thing. Across the table from her stretched out and taking up most of the room was Beel. Also staring at his book his handsome brow drawn together as he was trying himself to absorb the work they’d been assigned.

Ina was distracted. Every time the words started to make the slightest sense Beel would shift in his chair or he’d glance up at her flashing one of his sweet and boyish grins. Everything would just disappear as she could feel a blush fill her face. “How’s your work going?” Voice warm and tinged with honey. Beel looked as frustrated as she currently felt letting out a breath as he run one of his giant hands up through his hair. “I don’t feel like I’m retaining anything.”

His short awkward laugh was enduring. Nodding as Ina pushed her book away her own giggles matching the deep baritone of his. “Same, this assignment is terrible.” Locking gazes they both freeze for a moment before each glanced in a different direction.

“Maybe we should take a break?” Biting his lip Beel fidgets as his eyes return to Ina’s. Nodding enthusiastically happy to agree to anything that allows them to spend more time together hopefully without the stiff silence. “How have your classes been going?” It’s sweet the way the large man shrugs trying to initiate a easy conversation. His effort appreciated by Ina as she struggles to think about anything but how pretty his eyes look in this light.

“Alright I guess, Wish we had less work.” Voice trailing off as Beel seems to light up in the middle of her explanation.

“I almost forgot, I brought us snacks to share. Would you like some?” Reaching down to the floor level, Ina giggles again as Beel slams a very full bag down on the table between them.

“That sounds perfect Beel.” Face glowing as she glances up at him, the demon grows bashful under her praise. Grinning widely digging out a mountain of treats.

“I wanted everything to be nice for you.” The heat evident on his cheeks at his small confession. Biting her lip hard Ina forces a smile when she in fact wants to squeal out loud at how sweet this man she secretly adored was being to her.

“Thank you Beel.”

😘

OHHH Lea. Lea Lea Lea Lea. Lea. LeaaaaaAAAA

^ this was literally me when I saw this kskwmdksmw. I opened my eyes in the morning and I WAS GREETED WITH THIS ABSOLUTE BEAUTY-

I'm just so in awe and so grateful that I've just been unable to respond to this or function on this app for a few days akswkkdism2mfi,, IM JUST?????????? HEAD AND HEART FULL OF LOVE?????? 💕

Thank you thank you thank you thank you so much for writing this for me,, this is so sweet of you 😭💕💕

Being distracted from work is 100% accurate, I loved that ajwjekx,, and Beel is so sweet and cute in this! as always lolol

I genuinely have no idea how to show you how grateful and happy I feel - but I really do! This is the sweetest, and it's so good! Thank you sosoosososososososososoosossosos much 😭💕

[runnning-outof-time]

The Reopening | Arthur Shelby x Reader

Request: yes by anonymous

Pairing: Arthur Shelby x reader

Summary: After all of the stress of the London expansion, and the original Garrison Tavern being bombed by the Irish, all (Y/N) and Arthur want to do is celebrate this upcoming quiet period. What a better place to do this than at the reopening of the bar that means so much to their relationship.

Warnings: drinking, language

Word Count: 1895

A/N: this was a fun one to write. I hope you enjoy!

———

With smiles on their faces and their fingers intertwined, Arthur Shelby and (Y/N) (Y/L/N) walked towards the Garrison. It had been too long since they'd been inside, going from nearly spending every day at the pub to having to watch it go through reconstruction.

It was tough to get Arthur out of the house. He'd been a wreck since he lost himself during a boxing bout and killed a boy. But (Y/N) managed to coax him out, saying that this was his pub and that it wouldn't be a true reopening if he wasn't in attendance.

She also reminded him of what the Garrison meant to them as a couple. (Y/N) first met Arthur outside of the bar when he stepped into an argument that she and some asshole were having. The man wasn't talking 'no' for an answer, and Arthur managed to come out at the right moment, moving to her side and telling the man to leave, in some not so nice words, of course. (Y/N) was shocked that this man, whom she'd never met before, jumped right in to help her. She offered to cook him dinner as a means of thanking him. That dinner turned into several dates, and those dates turned into a few years long relationship that was still going strong. It amazed Arthur that (Y/N) still loved him despite the terrible things that he did. He knew he had something good with her, and he hoped that he'd never do anything to make her want to leave.

"You ready for a fucking party, love?" Arthur grinned, squeezing her hand as they walked to the doors of the pub.

"Always," (Y/N) grinned, sending a smile in her direction as he opened the door for her, allowing her to enter first before he followed her in. Arthur started hollering to all of the men in the room, who greeted him in the same way.

"Right! Let's get to fucking drinking then, eh?!" Arthur exclaimed, raising his hands in the air before he moved around to the serving side of the bar, getting busy with pouring drinks then. (Y/N) just smiled at him, happy to see him in his element again.

"You must've done something right to get him out of the house," Esme commented, her eyes also on the eldest Shelby member as she stopped at (Y/N)'s side.

"I reminded him of how important the Garrison is to him...to us," she answered her friend, who was nodding her head.

“You two met here, right?” Esme asked. She never really heard the full story, being that she was relatively new to the family.

“Yeah. Outside actually. He saved me from an overbearing man,” (Y/N) nodded as she spoke, a slight smile on her lips as she reminisced.

“You’re really great for him. I didn’t think he’d come back from the funk he was in this time,” the woman sitting to her left stated, making (Y/N)’s smile drop slightly. Arthur had had a tough year - partly because of the boxing bout, and partly because of his memories from the war. They’d come back at terrible times, but it really helped him to have (Y/N) there. She was his lighthouse when the waters got foggy - she led his lost ship back to shore.

“(Y/N)!” she heard from round the bar then. It was Arthur. She looked over to him, seeing that he was waving her over to him.

“I’m being summoned,” she said to Esme, the women both sharing a laugh before she hopped off the barstool to go over and join her boyfriend. “Yes, love?” she asked once she was standing in front of him.

“I’ve told them to put your favorite record on. Figured we’d share a dance,” Arthur grinned. As he said that, one of (Y/N)’s favorite pieces started playing.

A wide smile broke into her face before she grabbed Arthur’s hand, “let’s go!” she exclaimed, pulling him out into the pub’s open space that had been taken over as a dancefloor. They assumed their position and started moving to the beat, the wide smile still gracing (Y/N)’s face as she stared up at Arthur. There was a look of happiness on his face that she hadn’t seen in a while. It made her smile even wider.

“Ready?” he questioned her then, gripping onto her hand tighter as he nodded to her. She knew what he meant and nodded back, allowing for him to release her waist and spin her outwards, away from him. She laughed at the feeling, connecting her eyes with his as he held her out at the end of his fully extended arm for a moment before he spinned her back into his side. The two of them did two rotations together then before Arthur tilted her chin up with his index and middle fingers, allowing himself to press his lips to hers. (Y/N) was dizzy, both from the spinning and the feeling of him kissing her. Each kiss they shared felt like their first. (Y/N) couldn’t get enough of it. She loved the way his lips felt on hers.

“Since when did you become quite the dancer?” (Y/N) teased after they’d pulled away. “You used to move me around like you had two left feet,” she giggled slightly as she spoke.

“Since my lady has shown such an interest in dancing,” Arthur responded, a grin on his face as he searched her eyes, “couldn’t be looking like a fool with the most beautiful woman in the world in me arms,” he stated, his words making her blush.

“Oh, Arthur...” she trailed off, patting his chest lightly and playfully. “You can be such a sop sometimes,” she grinned as she spoke, “and I mean that in the most loving way possible,” she added for good measure.

Arthur just chuckled, removing one of his hands from her waist so that he could reach up and tuck a strand of her hair that had fallen when she was spinning. She mouthed a ‘thank you’ to him, reaching her hand up then to drag her fingers through his locks. She made sure that all of the stands of his hair were sitting neatly atop his head before placing her hand back in his shoulder. A frown formed on her face when a few strands fell back onto his forehead, making her reach up once again to put them back where they belong. Her smile only returned for a second before they fell back again, making her repeat her actions once more.

Arthur let her do this two more times before he took her hand into his and brought it down to their chests, “let it be, love,” he told her, a slight chuckle escaping his lips then.

“Arthur!” Tommy called out, breaking the couple away from the moment they were sharing. Arthur looked up, seeing his younger brother waving him over to where he was standing by the bar.

“Gotta go be the bar owner for a moment. I’ll be right back,” he stated, pressing a quick kiss to her lips before he broke their embrace and moved over to Tommy. (Y/N) watched as Tommy clapped him on the back, the two brothers sharing a laugh before Arthur turned to address the crowd. “Alright!” his voice commanded silence, and he made sure it was given to him before he continued, “Tommy wanted me to say a few words...on the reopening of the Garrison. Words ain’t my strong suit, so I’ll keep it short. Thank you to those of you who have taken time out of your night to come celebrate with us and spend your hard earned money on drinks. Nobody can fuck with the Peaky Blinders! This pub is a testament to that. Keep drinking and be merry, lads!” he finished his speech by raising a glass of whisky that Tommy had given to him when he stopped in front of him. His words were met by cheers before everyone took a drink, toasting to the reopening of the pub.

(Y/N) had returned to the bar as she watched Arthur speak with a smile. She then had an interesting conversation with Polly, who was completely beside herself at this point. The conversation ended with her catching the eyes of a younger man. “Him,” Polly commented, harking back to just moments ago when they were talking about Polly wanting to find someone to really celebrate with. “I’m gonna change his life,” she grinned before she stepped away from (Y/N)’s side, going in the direction of him then.

“She’s gonna do something to his life, alright,” Arthur remarked from the other side of the bar, making (Y/N) turn to see that he was standing directly across from her now. “Haven’t seen Pol this drunk in a while,” he commented then.

“She’s got a lot on her mind. I think she deserves to have one night where she’s free,” (Y/N) stated, frowning slightly as she thought about all that was going on in the older woman’s life. She was so close to reconnecting to her son, the only thing standing in her way being Tommy and his hesitancy to share the boy’s address. (Y/N) was able to sympathize and agree with both sides.

“You having a good time?” Arthur checked with her then, leaning against the bar so that he was slightly closer to her.

“I am,” she answered, pushing herself up on her toes in hopes that she’d be able to kiss him. The bar between them, combined with Arthur’s height difference, made it impossible to do, and this made (Y/N) frown. She wanted a kiss from him desperately. So she tried again and let out a groan this time when her attempt was rendered unsuccessful once more. This was truly frustrating her.

“Need something, love?” Arthur asked with a grin, knowing full well what she was trying to do.

“Yeah. I want a bloody kiss from my boyfriend, but he’s too far away from me,” she grumbled, crossing her arms after she attempted, and failed, one last time. It was hopeless.

“All you had to do was ask,” he stated, leaning over the bar and meeting her lips with his effortlessly.

“Not enough. Come over here,” she mumbled against his lips, not completely satisfied by the quick peck he’d just given her.

Arthur complied, walking proudly around the bar and into her grasp, allowing her to stand on her toes and kiss his lips with ease. He caught her waist, making it easier to keep her lips connected with his as she kissed him earnestly, conveying all of the love she had for him, as well as the pride that she also took in his accomplishments. “Was that better?” he asked once they pulled away. She was able to feel the grin on his lips as they brushed against hers.

“Much,” she grinned, pecking his lips once more before she pulled away from him completely. “Just so proud of you,” she told him then, her eyes meeting his.

“Couldn’t have done it without you, love. Life’s much easier with you by my side,” he told her, making her heart swoon before their lips met once more.

———

Tagged: @alreadybroken-ts @magicalxdaydream @the-anxious-youth

Masterlist

[leviackermanscleaningbuddy]

hi i love your writing its amazing and i hope you’re having a great day and staying well rested!❤️ i have a question for the pack, or more specifically the omegas. what are some of your favorite items of everyone else's you like to use when nesting? do you typically go for the same pack mates item every time? do you more prefer something from one of the alphas? sorry if this is a lot i’m just curious and just recently got into a/b/o kinda stuff❤️

"Hm." Felix hums a thoughtful sort of sound beneath his breath, eyes large and dark. "This is a really good question. And one that I'd say varies by omega?" He glances over at Hyunjin for approval. "Jinnie?"

"Yeah." The head omega nods immediately, offering the younger boy a soft, affectionate smile, his nose crinkling. "Yeah, just like ruts, all heats are different, no two are the same, and the same goes for nesting."

"I'm a very particular nester." Hyunjin goes on, looking thoughtful now, as Changbin, sitting beside him, slings an easy arm around his shoulders.

"We know." The alpha grins, easily dodging a pinch in the side from the glaring omega, even as he chuckles. "I didn't say it was a bad thing! Put your teeth away."

Hyunjin huffs and settles into Changbin's side regardless, even after giving him one more pointed glare with little to no bite.

"Anyway, as I was saying, I'm a picky nester and I always have been. Even when I first presented. Now that I belong to a pack, I have certain favorite items that I return to time and time again, and structure and materials are all super important to my omega when building a nest."

"I think we all have certain favorites though." Felix points out, Jeongin nodding beside him, and Hyunjin pauses to consider.

"Oh yeah, definitely, there's some items that all our omegas like, all across the board."

"Like hyung's Nirvana hoodie." Felix says with a grin in Chan's direction, even as the head alpha rolls his eyes playfully, though his body language exudes nothing but loving affection.

"Yeah, unfortunately. Because that's also one of my favorites."

Felix blows the alpha a kiss, and then turns back to Hyunjin.

"Okay, go on, Jinnie."

"Okay." Hyunjin nods, shifting into Changbin's side, as the older nuzzles his nose into his hair. "I think that we don't prefer alpha's things over other's necessarily? Yeah, alpha scents help the most during a heat, but not by themselves. They have to be layered with other pack member's scents-betas, other omegas-to really have their most powerful and helpful effect. I like my nests to be well represented and well rounded-there has to be at least one item from each member in them-so that everything is balanced, otherwise, I can't seem to settle down and relax."

Felix waits, and when it seems that Hyunjin is done for the moment, he speaks up next, tilting his head slightly, brow furrowed, as if deep in thought.

"I'm not as particular about my nests, necessarily, but I do like everything I use to smell particularly strong. Thus why I usually raid everyone's laundry baskets before laundry day, just in case."

He blushes lightly, offering all of you a sheepish grin, getting some coos in return, even as Minho pinches his cheek in an aggressively affectionate manner.

"We don't mind, Yongbok. Even if Changbin does complain."

Felix nods. "I know. And I appreciate it."

"That hoodie you took last time?" Jisung pipes up, offering the omega a heart shaped grin that crinkles his eyes. "I wore that for three days straight without ever taking it off before I gave it to you. Just for you, baby."

"Ew." Hyunjin screws up his nose in disgust, but Felix looks nothing but completely and utterly smitten.

"I know, Jisungie. Thank you."

"As far as favorite things?" Felix continues, looking thoughtful once more, considering. "Anything soft and warm is good enough for me. I don't like anything scratchy or with a lot of texture when I'm in my nest-like jeans or sequins-because I'm usually already a little over sensitive as it is."

"And I-" Jeongin chirps now, straightening up slightly beside Felix with a rakish grin. "-am still learning."

"And you're doing great, pup." Felix praises warmly, reaching out to pet the youngest omega's head, even as he butts into his hand like a needy kitten.

"The first time I ever nested was my heat shortly after I presented?" Jeongin continues, screwing up his nose at the memory. "It wasn't anything special, and I didn't really know what was happening, because it was just some frantic, primal urge then? Like, grab anything and throw it anywhere, just do something to feel better?"

"Yeah, the first one is rough. And especially in a heat." Hyunjin agrees, glancing over at the baby sympathetically. "You did great though, Innie. We were all so proud of you."

Jeongin blushes and clears his throat. "Anyway, now the hyungs have actually been teaching me how to make nests when I'm not in heat, and it's been pretty cool, but I'm still learning my preferences."

"I'm telling you-" Jisung exclaims, waving his hands at the youngest excitedly. "Make your nests into blanket forts. Do you know how awesome that would be?"

Jeongin grins. "I'll think about it, hyung."

[sugar-petals]

SuperM as Boyfriends Headcanon

↪ caro’s note. extra long version because i miss ‘em. best boys, they’re all bf material to the moon and back ♡

5k words | bullet points

○ warnings ⚠️ 18+, dom/sub play, shibari, female reader, grinding, poly mentions, threesomes, face-sitting, femdom & vanilla, smut and fluff

⌈ ten

— motto: they won’t underestimate me for long.

most of your social environment is gonna be confused by ten at the beginning 

and don’t really get what he’s all about

or think he’s like whatever, some random guy in a tank top

acting peculiar

finding him kind of hard to gauge

some of your family and relatives might even think he’s totally unusual and a sneaky fuckboy making you mad 

they seriously wonder what you see in him

down the line that perception has turned by 180 degrees

as it should

ten becomes more irreplaceable, relatable, beautiful, perfect and impressive the more you know him

he’s not as mysterious and impossibly badass as everyone assumes

his personality is very approachable to you 

and you find him interesting in every aspect, looks to hobbies to background to personal habits

and also opinions because ten is a guy who really thinks stuff through

so you gotta be roughly on the same wavelength 

he likes discussing controversial and complicated stuff a lot for sure

being far wiser than his age suggests 

you are the first to share those things with him until the rest of the world catches up to this gem of a person

spending so much time with you

in the most personal way he can

he takes you to see the floating markets in bangkok, you spend the summer in thailand

wakeboarding and playing badminton

his entire family knows you inside out at some point this shit is serious

it’s very important to him to go back to the roots every now and then

and that you have been around his home city as well

getting to enjoy the area and time together eating the most savory delicacies

renting a boat and paddling you around to the important spots, he can explain any question you have

this kissing is gonna be so romantic 

who needs a vacation in venice when you can go to thailand with none other than ten himself as your ferryman let that sink in

except eating durian there he is, the boyfriend who can do anything!

with seemingly no effort

ten does little kind services of love for you throughout the day

he pours you herbal tea, fixes some furniture (he’s surprisingly good at tinkering), comes home from the bakery with your favorite pastry, does the laundry with your favorite fabric softener

he also goes on a huge shopping spree with you monthly because fashion is key in this household and it’s tremendous fun

you giggle when he puts on oversized shirts deliberately to look funny

everyone in the clothing store will think oh man what an adorable pair

ten will model the living hell out of the entire stock

and buy you the cape you really really want as a birthday present

said item turns out to be your favorite couple accessory

because you can sit next to each other on a bench at the river and wear it

what’s not to love about a portable blanket

of course he will take to instagram and make it such a cool thing, photographies of you wearing really cool coats and jackets

mirror bathroom selfies together as well, with a back hug, the classic

and not just for insta

you snuggle a lot generally

ten is always available for affection

and accepts all PDA

he’s a kitty after all, he loves the warmth of your body more than you know

remember how taemin said ten’s hands are always cold, newsflash not anymore since you stuff them into the pocket of your hoodie whenever you can

and hello sir your paws will be nice and cozy on my waist

or hand in hand when you waltz through your apartment

time for dance is a must

oh my god ten is so good at all of this

although say he’s definitely faster into latin than standard genres

tango argentino, he loves flamenco as well

don’t believe me? ten is a diehard rosalía stan!

vamos

so, no-brainer, expect a lot of dancy stuff 

that escalates into wild, passionate fucking

which probably looks like an aggressive form of couple exercises

you poor sore souls

ten’s lil kitty butt is falling apart from all the “i can handle a bigger one!”-level pegging and you have aching legs all over

favorite position? full nelson

if you ask me ten’s ass is probably so carved out by the end of this you could fit lucas and kai in there from head to toe

this is not for the faint of heart

sex with this guy is extra cardio

and if you’re into that a threesome is gonna go down sooner or later

with our girl lisa

there. i said it

miss manoban in those knee-high boots, grinding her thighs between yours and you finishing off on ten’s face? the fucking hottest thing ever i need a moment wow

i don’t have to tell you how orgasmic this is gonna be

steamy sex life with ten very recommended

⌈ kai

— motto: you’re like a precious rose. i’ll protect you forever.

to be straightforward with you

he is in so heavily in demand it’s madness

to give you an idea of the scale

mark is basically occupied by yuta until the end of time 

but kai has an entire idol fanclub on top of all erigoms

those sharp moves did not go unnoticed

he gets an inkigayo sandwich every other day

jesus christ

if rent-a-sexy-bf.com was a thing kai would be the most requested

his phone would be blowing up with contracts like

and you also have to pass kyungsoo’s vibe check

and taemin’s

the road to being kai’s gf is indeed the way of the samurai

i mean honestly: kim jongin is without a doubt the hardest member to get a date with

this has got to be the most selective man of the entire industry or something

if he likes you he REALLY likes you

and he will be the one showing initiative

because he wants to make it clear he isn’t just spending time out of politeness or something

although it’s pretty logical that if kai was unable to reject someone he would no longer be an idol but a harem husband busy every hour of the day

seoul would be able to found its own village 

kai town

where like 70% of the population is pregnant

but since kai wants to keep on dancing obviously and he wants to lend his heart to only one person 

seoul has to settle with a singular nini family house instead of a kai district

where you and the man himself are a full-fledged household basically since kai’s nieces double as actual kids

if you wanna be a young ass ‘mom but not mom with kids’ and be married to kim kai this is it

does he have a thing for milfs or something

that thought just came to my mind

anyway you’re mommy anyway wink wink

fucking til’ dawn until even his muscles hurt

going raw at the gym together

him cooking the most random food with the infamous waffle maker

cuddling with an army of teddy bears surrounding you

walking the dogs with the sexiest dancer alive 

and the sexiness is only the tip of the iceberg 

we know he’s all-round amazing

kai is the king of figuring out ways to chill out with you anywhere anytime

and yes innocent chilling

...unless you’re in the mood for something else

up to you

anyway

sweet innocent chilling for now... with the stunner... just smooching at best things aren’t going raw or anything

on the couch in the kitchen in the car when it’s parked somewhere in nature

kai takes you very seriously and is a great listener

he’s literally so respectful and open-minded i can’t

he will keep your secrets and stand up for you if it’s ever needed

yes he is extremely caring and invested

kai does not tolerate others being shady towards you

if there’s an instance where you are hurt and unable to assert yourself don’t worry. he knows how to confront others with measure but a firm determination.

kai takes a lot of that responsibility but only to the degree where you are comfortable

i think you get what i mean by that

and he is diplomatic instead of plain patronizing

you have a right to be protected. it means he not only treats you well, but also makes sure your well-being isn’t disturbed in any other way outside of the relationships

outside influences aren’t to be underestimated

and since kai is a godly man you encounter a lot of jealousy from others

a matter he will take into his hands since he knows he’s the reason

standing up for you also means saying no 

to these jealous voices so this is an important boundary he has to draw

that all kinds of hellbent people want to get into his pants and take his stage image too literally is not up to you to fix

kai is there for you to enjoy and love not to defend

that’d be exhausting and beside the point 

kai prevents stress and negativity to come to you

i hope i explained this well he doesn’t do this to be bossed up or make you weak it’s because he wants to make life easier for you

guys being protective will be chalked up as chauvinistic these days. often rightfully so 

but what i mean is that kai support you in all regards so you won’t be at a disadvantage or feel terrible about something

⌈ taeyong

— motto: we’ll take good care. enjoy the pleasure.

he’s the type of boyfriend who will ask you about things he missed out on while he was busy

things um from the internet

while mark literally knows that one by heart already taeyong will ask you things like what the wellerman song is

and you thought it would be something nsfw

i got you fooled

did we forget that the man literally watched nct memes on youtube

taeyong is both even more 18+ than you think but also even more innocent than you think it’s complicated

this man is just hard to describe he’s so different, i mean every person is unique but he’s an original it’s the extra mile you know

anyway

sea shanties

bopping to it all day since he just heard it 

singing it while he prepares dinner based on a youtube recipe video as he often does

he’s the most adorable person ever ever ever

asking you why shanties are back in fashion 

(good question, requires a deeper sociocultural analysis i reckon)

planning to remix one for his soundcloud lmao i kid you not

maybe your favorite shanty 

featuring fast-pace rap and all

creating his own previously unknown phrases and shit like that you know him

palazzo rocco lemon detox flashbacks

he’s hilarious i swear

taeyong will produce his own shanties for you can you imagine

as he says: my happiness is your happiness

watch out he will drop a shanty music video with extra krumping moves

taeyong is a never-ending source of pure crack

prepare to laugh a lot like, a lot lot

how can a man who seemingly has such a serious outlook on life and such a bonkers kinda face be so lighthearted

it’s like he’s peter pan or something

especially since he has to manage like over 20 brats in nct his cutesy behavior towards you as his gf will stand out to you

yeah so to be clear we all know he’s the cute one in the relationship

and guess who wears the pants

that’s always you ma’am don’t deny it

or wait 

not for long actually because they come off um physically

but not metaphorically

because who doesn’t wanna sit on his face tbh

your favorite reserved spot

he loves it

taeyong has such a thing for your body it’s ridiculous

mister lee got a sexy mama

and you have such a thing for the gloriousness that is him

but neither of you will not admit it as openly as other people would think

all there is... is being flustered

baekhyun probably has to play some cupid now and then

and give you some ideas

like gifting taeyong plushies and things like that

baekhyun knows what taeyong is all about so the advice is very welcome

but most things you find out for yourself

by being a little braver with him you know

you walking around naked in the apartment or basically fresh out the shower with nothing but a towel

will shake up taeyong so immensely, he will back himself against a wall without you even pinning him there lmao!

jeez he’s so deep into kinky stuff but easily shook anyway

i quote him again: “born to be cute, i dunno!”

you can imagine the overwhelm when you rub yourself against him like it’s nobody’s business

it’s so much fun to give taeyong a regular horny meltdown not gonna lie

this man was grinding his whole body all over the superm stage and now he’s basically freezing up and drooling

how many denied and ruined orgasms he’s gonna get, so much overstimulation all the way  

you’ll lose count of it

and just how wet you’re gonna be

is a thing for the history books

taeyong isn’t such a big deal in nct for no reason god gave him every talent 

so great sex is obviously in his repertoire

i think you’re gonna break some records for most fucks per week

you know... guys like lucas taemin kai and baekhyun spend more time wooing and teasing and flirting

but taeyong gets down to business

one glance is enough

⌈ lucas

— motto: the hottest couple around.

ah, big boy

you really got this man’s attention

doing nothing much at all really

he probably just saw you walking around talking to friends

carrying an impossibly huge veggie burger munching and enjoying yourself after going on a jog

yeah boy that’s how you catch his eye

they say love begins in the stomach and that is the true meaning

or the nose, your food smells really good, lucas is going crazy, he’s seeing stars and shit

anyway

the towering burger isn’t the only thing he wants

lucas cannot get you out of his mind no matter how much he tries to distract himself 

with more good food, movies, games

fooling around with wayv or the superm maknaes, and working out

he’s admittedly... a little himbo head over himbo heels with you the feels got to him

he’s not gonna say it’s a date he’s just gonna invite you just because

to hang out in the kitchen while taeyong cooks and baekhyun comes up with the idea to play twister

imagine lucas with his long arms and legs bending himself all over the place

fighting with kai who almost crashed his shoulders into taemin who avoided the accident quickly

making you lose a round

obviously lucas will hustle until your team wins

mostly because he’s so tall and baekhyun is so small which is a huge advantage when stacking each other over the map

let’s just face it baekhyun only suggested this game to bite everyone’s butts and to see you have skinship with lucas

which is definitely a successful plan of the leader

yukhei is in paradise 

jumping around his room like an oversized bunny after you went home

don’t lie, you fell hard for him as well he’s just such a presence

emotionally, physically

a gentle but persistent giant

he’ll do anything to make your relationship happen once he knows you’re interested

if there’s someone meant to be a boyfriend it’s gotta be him come on

he will cave in after a while and admit he can’t just forget about you 

not gonna lie

your ex is gonna be shaking in his ratty boots

his poor eyes will literally jop from their unexpecting sockets

when he sees lucas hanging out with you

with his shining blonde hair and tall stature, that perfect shapely body, with great fashion on top of that

looking like your guardian angel

man, xuxi really does

pulling you out of your slump that’s been going on for months

and bringing back smiles and a good time he knows how to do that best

and big big hugs of course

you can imagine how soothing and grounded it feels with such huge arms around you

he will make sure that feeling is always there when you need it

because you deserve that treatment

which means he will come over very very often

yeah get ready for how yukhei is a lot more driven than you think just dial and he will be there

underneath the meme surface is someone very determined who really really wants you

yukhei is chaotic good incarnate but in that area he isn’t messing around

his brain is like: “gotta be with her”

on repeat

he must call you, he literally can’t sleep without tying loose ends together as quickly as possible

no second wasted with this guy, even far down the relationship timeline

i really pity your ex 

i mean someone dating any superm member would drive their former partner completely nuts 

but lucas is a special case

he has that kind of look and aura that makes other guys dig themselves into the ground like wiggling worms or cope by fanboying over him

i don’t wanna make this sound like a competition and yet — congrats on your noodly blondie boyfriend alright

⌈ mark

— motto: two nerds in love.

how to explain this. mark is a perfect balance of a lover, a talker, and a shy bean

with a tendency toward bean

and flicking the bean

you know

cutting right to the chase are we

mark is very invested in pleasing you as good as he can

and defeating his awkwardness

because if we know one thing it’s that he always strives to become better and better like he can’t help it

and isn’t afraid of almost biting off more than he can chew

how many subunits is he part of at this point is it gonna be nct hollywood as well god dangit

back to the point mark doesn’t treat relationships and sex as something static which is a good and rare thing

he does his best and always looks for room to improve

while being very nervous, very bilingual, it takes two languages or more to express what he thinks about you let that sink in

that’s very shaky first date sex while being extremely in love with each other

lucky you

and an afterglow where he plays the guitar for you

that’s so nice 

he can play it while laying down and shit

while singing

not rapping, actual full-fledged serenading

we’ve heard how that sounds in the relay cam

are you dating some kind of teenage heartthrob or something huh

mark will make it very clear he’ll stick around, this bad bitch is here to stay

or actually, he’s a good bitch, don’t misunderstand

mark doesn’t have a lot of edgy in him unless rap is concerned

he’s the kinda guy to get lost in IKEA with 

having a good time 

as often as his schedule permits

you really have to make use of your time together 

this man might as well the busiest idol out there

and you are no different because birds of a feather

you’re both mr. and ms. independent 

out and about very often

so meeting up becomes something special during comeback season

or wait mark always has a comeback going on

which is a double-edged sword but something you both know you signed up for 

which is why you spend a lot of time around NCT dream, 127, and SuperM 

sm’s publicity agents have to work extra hard i’m telling you

a dating rumor is the last thing both of you would need

since you befriend several members you gotta stay on the low as well

but hey the rage of jealous people of the public is nothing compared to the force of nature that is yuta nakamoto

who seriously thinks himself threatened and robbed

in case you are feeling possessive as well...

...you might have to fistfight yuta

to be able to be with mark

who is basically property of osaka at this point

yuta is a scorpio that’s just the way it is

unlike taeyong who wishes his rap buddy the best, yuta kinda wants to be mark’s wingman and see him date, live his best life

but also have mark for himself to fawn over and to adore, to be fascinated by

we get it yuta. bisexual struggles. very understandable

you have to promise in person that mark doesn’t forget about the holy gaming nights with yuta 

which is hilarious since that’s not up to you but mark’s memory

bestie, yuta uses everyone as a scapegoat don’t sweat it too much

regardless you put a weekly reminder on the fridge

so the roaring lion yuta would be pacified

he doesn’t want to lose his sweetheart can you blame him

the ultimate but also most risky solution is obviously inviting yuta for movies 

which will be appreciated but also cause a storm

mark will definitely break a sweat when you start a popcorn war or try to prove who hugs mark the best 

caught in the middle of mayhem is mark lee’s specialty what did you expect

this either ends with murder or a chaotic open relationship down the line

yuta really is attached but who wouldn’t be

it could be worse mark has double the love you know 

⌈ baekhyun

— motto: you wanna know why i’m your candy?

baby tell me are you ridin’?

in fair verona where we lay our scene...

that baekhyun always wants to woo you — his way, which proves to be very interesting to say the least — is never hard to miss

putting in effort is mochi default mode 

no matter what stage of the relationship you’re in

he might as well regularly serenade you under your balcony in the backyard just because

probably singing ‘baby we can stay up’ and wiggling his ass in all directions because he’s a dirty boy gone wild

yeah. nowadays romeo is twerking instead of feuding with tybalt

that’s good for him and everyone involved

you in particular because you get some very racy eye candy

you know how baekhyun is

at least nobody’s around seeing him put on an 18+ show like that

your little guy is one unhinged fella

if it starts pouring he will grind up and down the next lantern and belt out ‘singing in the rain’

you bet he can do some actual pole dance

he’s strong and bendy you know

and loves to gyrate his whole bag of bones like... he wants to hit you with all the body rolls

in the rain

what a freaky man

but hey you wanna stay up for sure 

doesn’t take long until you beckon him to come upstairs

where the only way to alleviate him of his wet clothes—

oh well he has those roger rabbit vibes and you can’t be mad at it

he will play off all his hormonal antics

baekhyun is hilarious

and so perverted, he can keep up with your spicy idea of playing patty-cake don’t worry

how do i know you’re an extra nsfw kinda person?

who else would like baekhyun

he says juicy things all the time

and does juicy things

yes. finally a couple on eye level indeed. 

when baekhyun asks are you ridin’ you ask how hard 

bruh

this is gonna be fun

and remember

beside handing you sacks of money

his priority is always to make you smile

i’m kidding about the bags but

baekhyun is so rich it’ll show in your relationship, but he’s more about the interactions with you rather than the lifestyle

baekhyun didn’t hustle for a bentley he hustled to sing and get out of sm alive alright

financial stability: important

luxury: very nice to have, he can make you the presents you want to have and travel a lot together

but smiles: baekhyun priority

because he so badly wants to know you love him and adore him, he sometimes feels so insecure

of course you do

you always reassure him with your reactions

it’s very important to him don’t underestimate it

baekhyun has always been talking about his ideal type in terms of how he can cheer her up

so even the naughtiest sexy time evenings are gonna be filled with all giggles

anyway other than that your pussy will be dripping

because this guy is as horny as all other members of super m combined

and you have your ways of leaving him tongue-tied and wrists-tied

taemin’s impact

superm isn’t short of bondage supplies we all know that

so yeah. shibari baekhyun is gonna happen

since he does pilates imagine what kinda shapes you can bend this lil guy into

and take some pictures

privé is in trouble 

bondage model baekhyun is bursting onto the scene

you might even run a risque blog that features cropped pictures with him

heh — you think people will recognize him by his body?

nope

first: you only upload HD pictures that aren’t whitewashed

baekhyun is basically never photographed like that

second: who expects baekhyun to be featured on a bdsm blog with his girlfriend

and this is the guy that drives you around in his expensive car with his big black shades on 

well what can i say

nothing is the way it seems

⌈ taemin

— motto: i’ll unfold a whole new world for you.

taemin is cocky, he’s sensual, and: a very smiley person as we know

least boring relationship ever

he will prance toward you whenever he can to involve you in cuddles

touch-starved taemin is a thing

kkoong can tell you about it, he needs kisses and embraces so often

might as well pepper him with it no problem

and put him into your oversized sweaters when he eats ice cream on the sofa, watching movies, and you brush his ever-growing hair

he’s smol he’s gonna fit into them don’t worry

and on the other hand he likes a rough and tough girl who thinks of him like a boy toy

who acts tsundere or like his bodyguard

working out almost daily to the point of sweat all over

a gal probably able to pretzel minho lucas and chanyeol into one giant bundle

taemin truly has the taste of a divo

multi-layered as always

so you couldn’t say the relationship is always the same in sentiment, the vibe of the dynamic could be different every day

we love a complex man

what would be volatile to others is actually an advantage up close

because taemin understands every difficult facet of himself and his partner 

even if those facets might be contradictory

or something that’s felt shameful about

he will accept and listen anyway

the same goes for getting what drives you

taemin is like a walking psychology velvet couch with fancy swirls as arm rests

point is he isn’t fooled by the surface of the world

he knows what has to be known

which also means your looks aren’t the part he prioritizes

and not even outward personality and habit is what he’s drawn to

it’s the mentality and values underneath

that’s true compatibility to him and he can feel it

he’s really really smart

and also finds it important that you get along with shinee and superm, that you think they’re nice to be around and vice versa

especially kai as taemin’s absolute bearly bestie. if kai thinks you’re shady and you don’t like kai either

or if you’re permanently super awkward and taemin’s moodmaking doesn’t help

we have a problem

but fair enough

kai and taemin are basically one soul at this point so if taemin likes you jongin does anyway 

bff telepathy

in fact jongin was probably the one introducing you to taemin lmao!

because he knows you go well together instinctively and he is correct

so not to worry then

and it’s good on taemin to think longterm and not see you as a person outside of social interaction y’know

cough cough he thinks about marriage, you might be ms. lee one day

here he goes again taemin is just very mature seeing you as well-rounded in every aspect of life

without letting his dick make the important decisions at the detriment of making this a relationship of two lives not just two bodies only

but obviously don’t assume taemin is no horny devil. we all know he dreams of the freakiest scenarios and fantasies in this whole group

going kinda crazy about the thought of making you cum which he always wants to try with new methods

which occupies his mind more than a big bowl of super spicy noodles which is taemin’s favorite meal so

at the same time taemin junior is definitely the same clingy attention whore as his sparkly owner

limp wrists from all the handjobs on your side

and very swollen lips from giving all that head on his side

this is gonna be interesting

he puts the 6v6 in 69

equals 69v69 am i right

but i’m serious that’s gonna be a lot of oral action

you definitely ask each other about having sex very often, daily if you have the time and find a nice spot

and how on earth do both of you keep your hands off each other sleeping in one bed

taemin is touchy as hell with no shyness, and you squish squeeze and grope this guy like the mochi he is

ah when things go both ways

© submissive-bangtan 2017-2021. all rights reserved. do not repost or translate. all depictions fictional.

[wandaromanova]

🔥anon here! :D

um for blurb night, maybe one where carol or wanda (or maybe both hehe) are super protective of r so they give nat the best friend talk after her and r get together, and then r walks in during it and it’s really funny but also fluffy

btw i read Reality today at school (it’s my senior year it’s fine i can read fanfics in class if i want to-) and it was amazing omg i struggled to not smile in front of everyone but your writing is AMAZING i love everything you write sm!! :D

Warnings: swearing, threatening

blurb requests are closed | navigation

please do not repost or try and take ownership of my work. reblogs, likes, and comments are always welcome. <3

•❅────────────── ᗢ ‎⧗ ───────────────❅•

You liked to think that you were extremely blessed. You saved the world for a living with people you considered family. From your best friend, Wanda, to your new girlfriend. Natasha; life was great.

Wanda was extremely protective of you, and rightfully so. You were the first person she grew a bond with after the loss of her family members and country. You supported her at her darkest times and became a sister figure in her life. 

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

You were the life raft that carried her back to shore.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

So, when you told her about your relationship with Natasha; she went into protective sister mode.

One day, Wanda waltzed into the living room and caught sight of the Russian sitting on the couch, book in hand. 

Wanda smirked, this was the perfect time to give Natasha the infamous ‘talk.’

No… not the birds and the bees talk, but the ‘fuck with my sister and I’ll murder you’ talk.

The Sokovian rounded the couch and took a seat right beside Natasha, gaining her attention. The redhead looked up at Wanda with a questioning brow, and the woman smiled. 

“Hello, Natasha. I believe you and I have something important to discuss.” Wanda spoke friendly, but there was a glint in her eye that the former assassin noticed. So, Natasha closed her book and put it off to the side, giving Wanda her undivided attention. 

“We do?” Natasha questioned and the other woman nodded. “Yes, we do. It’s about Y/N.” At the mention of your name, the Russian smiled and that didn’t go unnoticed by Wanda.

“If you ever hurt Y/N, I won’t hesitate to destroy you from the inside out. You know just as much as anyone else here, just how powerful and capable I am.” Wanda spoke seriously, tilting her head to the side slightly with a warning glare. 

Natasha was definitely intimidated. It took her a whole two weeks to come back from Wanda’s mental infiltration during the events of Ultron.

But, as always, she didn’t show her fear, but instead, nodded her head in understanding.

“I’d never hurt Y/N. We may have just started dating, but I’ve known her for years. I know the real her and if I were to hurt her, I would probably destroy myself before you even get the chance.” 

Natasha’s tone was just as serious as Wanda’s. The Sokovian scoured the assassin’s mind for any trace of a lie, but was pleased when she found none.

“Glad we’re on the same page, Romanoff. Just always remember that Y/N may not be my sister by blood, but she’s still my sister. And I would go through great lengths to keep her safe, even if it means getting my hands dirty.” 

There was a threat behind Wanda’s words and Natasha was going to reply, but she was interrupted when you walked in. 

You had been walking around the Compound in search of your girlfriend and paused just before you got to the living room.

You heard the entire conversation and couldn’t help but roll your eyes at your best friend’s protectiveness. 

However, it warmed your heart that she cared and that Natasha cared about you just as much.

“Okay, Witchy. That’s enough threatening my girlfriend for the day. Leave her alone.”

You rounded the couch and shoved Wanda, effectively leaving a space between the two women. 

You plopped onto the seat and Natasha smiled at you before pressing her lips against yours firmly.

You got lost in the kiss as your lips moved together, but the moment was ruined by a dramatic groan followed by fake gagging, 

“Oh, god. You guys are disgusting.” Wanda grunted out and you pulled away from Natasha, your head turning to the Sokovian.

“Aw, Wands. Did you want a kiss too?” You asked with faux sympathy and Wanda’s eyes widened. 

“No. You better not.” The Sokovian protested, but you didn’t care.

You leaned towards her and Wanda tried to get away, but she was trapped between you and the armrest of the couch. You placed sloppy kisses all over her face and the brunette wasn’t pleased.

“You’re fucking disgusting. Get off!” You laughed as Wanda grew irritated. Finally, after a minute, you pulled away and Wanda wiped her face in disgust.

Natasha was chuckling beside you, wrapping her arm around your waist as you sat upright.

“There, now everyone got a kiss.” You smiled at your girlfriend triumphantly.

She shook her head at your antics with a wide smile across her face. Your attention returned to Wanda as she abruptly stood up with a glare.

“I won’t hesitate to destroy you either, Y/N.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Is that a threat or a promise?”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“You’re repulsing.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Love you too, sis.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

───────── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──────────

taglist: @perfectromanoff @aliancvnas @marvelwomenslut @chaekhan @rvselie @imasimpfornatashamaximoff @prentisshoe @mcubreakdown101 @multiyfandomgirl40 @fear-street-girls @007giu @weelight @puppy-danvers2016 @acertainredhead @jdougl-love @mindofwesley @lostandsearching @tquick99 @rachel146 @illloveyou @thewidowsghost @uraveragelonelygay @wandasgirlfriend @olicity-boo @suki-is-a-queen @xxromanoffxx @b-5by5 @hagridsmomma @blurryylines @yeeterthekeeper @maximoff-jp @midnight-lestrange @tomatonugget @mrs-avenger3000 @wandanatblogs @simpfornatasharomanoff @whyisgamora777 @xxxtwilightaxelxxx @grxvitye @hunka-hulka-burnin-fudge @clipreads @kathleenmikaelson

[gb-patch]

Ask Answers: August 8th

Well, doing big posts all together worked for a while but lately I’ve been putting it off because it takes a long time to get them done. I think I’m gonna try switching back to answering asks whenever I can fit it in and posting them one at a time instead of waiting until I’ve filled out one of these major collections.

But for now, here’s more ask answers! Thank you for the questions and for all the kind words along with them ^^.

Hello!! I'm here to ask if its possible to get  the game and its dlcs on steam and play it on android?

I’m afraid not. Steam doesn’t have Android builds on their own site and Steam is not cool with keys for other sites being given out for Steam purchases, so you don’t get the Itch version from buying on Steam.

Hello! Sorry to bother you but, I had a question, if we buy the Game on itchio do we get steam keys or would we need to purchase it twice? 

You would have to buy it twice if you want it in both places, I’m sorry. To repeat myself a little, Steam doesn’t like the key trading thing. Itch may support giving keys for another site, but the reverse isn’t doable with Steam and Steam doesn’t even really want you to get a Steam key for buying somewhere else either. So we just don’t mess around with that.

hey, sorry if this is frequently asked, but is step 4 free dlc or paid for? some of your sources are contradicting each other. 

It’s free! There’s a paid wedding DLC, but Step 4 itself is entirely unpaid.

Hello! I just had a quick question, for the Baxter and Derek DLC's will we be able to confess our feelings to them or let them confess to MC? or will it only be one way? (they confess to MC)

Both type of options will be available!

Hey there! I wanted to ask whether or not the Derek DLC is still on track to be released in August since on the steam discussion board it says it will be released mid 2021. I totally understand if it isn't, I'm just really looking forward to it! If you answer then ty! And keep up the amazing work :D 

It’s not, aha. Unfortunately, 2021 wasn’t easier than 2020 as we hoped so things are still slower than planned. It’ll come out late 2021 or early 2022.

Hi! Firstly I just want to say that I LOVE Our Life. I have played a bit of similar games but this one instantly wins for the best one! Everything about it is amazing! I just wanted to ask if Derek would ever lose feelings for MC, like if they make the deal and then MC gets with Cove would he move on? and even if you don't, after "losing contact" would his feeling fade or would he still like MC? 

If you don’t really keep in touch with him and clearly move on with your life, Derek will too and he’ll be over it. But if you are still close as best as you can be, he’ll still think the MC is special. Though, he’ll always support your relationship with someone else if that’s what’ll make you happy.

Hello! Sorry if you've answered this before but: 'How's Lee related to us? Though which momma? And does she share our player-chosen last names? Also, do you know if Noelani took Pam's last name or did it happen the other way round? 

She’s related to Pamela and Pamela’s last name is the one they use, so the MC has the same last name as Lee.

Will we be able to choose which (they or he) we tend to call Qiu by more often, or will it randomly change depending on the moment? 

Qiu knows which pronoun they’re comfortable with at a time and you’ll call them what they’re happy with. And it doesn’t change between lines, it takes multiple scenes or even full Steps for it to switch. So for extended periods Qiu will be totally a guy or fully agender.

Will Step 4 of OL2 have moments?

It’ll be an epilogue like it is in OL1, so it won’t have a bunch of different Moments.

Hello! Just a quick question, is Sunset bird from OL1 based on a real location? If so what's it called? I wanna visit it +_+

ps i love your games so much <3

It isn’t based on one specific town you can go to, but there are a lot of little coastal towns in Cali that have a similar vibe!

Heyaaa ( I hope you're all well ), umm… it might seem kinda stupid to ask but did Patreon members can have a key for the dlc's ( all the steps-released dlc ) even if they became a member this month or later ? (me? saying this cuz it's my case? maybe ;-;), and once again thanks for absolutely all the amazing works on all the games ! u-u 

You wouldn’t get the DLCs for backing there. The Patreon is for extra bonus content/early access, rather than being a storefront to purchase the normal DLCs. Rarely we give them out as a side gift, but it hardly happens and if what you want is the DLCs it’s best to ignore the Patreon and  buy keys for those directly from Itch or Steam. I’m sorry for the confusion.

Hey y'all, love what youre doing w/Terry. Trans rep outside of player customization is so rare and important to see more of so thank you so much. I do have a question and its that does he have a canon sexuality? I know Miranda was said to be straight ace but I dont believe anything was stated for Terry probably because he wasnt revealed to be a guy which changes things. Im also curious if well get answers on how long hes liked Miranda since he may have liked her in step 3 before she liked him 

Terry likes women and Randy likes men! And he did like Miranda back in Step 3.

Will the Wedding Dlc release at the same time as Step 4? 

They’ll come out separately with Step 4 releasing first.

I really love Our Life so much! I've spent over 20hours playing it even though I only got it a week ago! I was wondering if I could make a fangame for Our Life with a different love interest but same plot. Next-door neighbors romance, multiple steps, etc? I'll probably make it on Google Slides though- 

Sure! I hope you have fun with it and I’m glad you love the game.

How does Cove feel about poly relationships? 

He’s got nothing against them for the people they work for, but he’s 100% monogamous and would only be comfortable with a partner who was willing to be monogamous with him.

Idk if this has been answered before but will Step 4 include the option to advance your feelings towards Cove? 

Yep, you’ll be able to determine your feelings and what your relationship is.

In step 4 will there be a chosen to say we live with Cove even as just friends? 

Yeah, you can choose to live with Cove and that can be done when you’re friends.

I just played the game with the MC and Cove being best friends and omg it’s still so damn cute like the wholesomeness of it all is too much for my heart I swear ^.^  Now with that all said I was wondering can we still marry Cove? if we only love him as a friend like let’s say we’ve made deal with him similar to the one we can make with Derek because let’s real no one could compete with what the MC and Cove have even if they aren’t in love. 

It’s great to hear you enjoyed the friendship story! You can live with Cove, but you can’t marry him platonically. Cove has familial affection for the MC if they’re best-est friends. He wouldn’t think to marry someone he loves like family and even grew up with as though they truly were siblings.

Are you still going to be making a DLC for XOBD? :] 

Yes! We’re slowing adding voiced lines and fixing errors.

It makes me laugh that Shiloh's last name is Fields because that's what I put as my last name! So in Our Life when he talked about "Ms. Fields" picking him up I was extremely confused, lol. That dude mimics personalities so much that he stole my surname!

Oh, wow, that’s a very funny coincidence, haha.

hi !! i cant seem to be able to get the scene where mc is able to propose to cove despite being at the 'love' stage and telling him i'd want to get married, are there any other details that im missing out on? the options just dont appear at the end... 

Maybe you missed telling Cove you were in love with him even if you mentioned wanting to get married or you might’ve accidentally said earlier in the game that you don’t want to progress your relationship further with Cove. We haven’t removed them, so you can get the scene again. It’s just kind of easy to miss since there’s multiple requirements. You can read a little guide in the FAQ.

wait what di you need to do to be able to propose to cove? I've been trying but haven't had much luck 

You can check out the FAQ linked above!

does cove only develop a crush on the mc if the mc is also at crush/in love with him? 

Technically, yes. We treat the non-romantic relationship options as truly non-romantic since we don’t want to bait and switch people. But there’s nothing wrong with headcanoning that Cove does have feelings developing for the MC even before the MC has.

Is there a way to make/allow Lee and Baxter to date?

No, they just don’t have enough time together.

We also got a group of asks related to Tamarack in OL2, but I’m afraid the way they talked about people with larger bodies made me not want to post their words, even if the person didn’t say they’re trying to be hurtful. I will separate out the core question and answer it though, so people can know that info.

Does Tamarack lose weight in later Steps?

No, she doesn’t. As for the other questions included, to be honest, I don’t have to explain/defend having romance options of different sizes. I’m sorry if you’re dealing with unhappiness that’s connected to body image, if that’s where the negative emotions are coming from, but even so I can’t meet you on that level and pretend it’s a problem that needs an answer. A girl who simply isn’t thin being a main love interest is just not an unreasonable concept. Also, Tamarack isn’t a lesbian. Yes, she can date a female MC, but that doesn’t undo her actual sexuality, so I’m not sure where that one part at the end was coming from.

I wonder... can we "fight" with Qiu over leader status? 👀

Not really, haha. No matter how cool your MC is, they’re never gonna replace Qiu for the other kids around. So you can either partner up with him, follow him too, or not be a part of all that group politics stuff.

So when I play the game, sometimes I mentally call Cove “Covie/Covey” and that made me wonder, how does Cove feel about being nicknamed? Not like Romeo/Space Cadet/etc. but like pet names relating to his actual name

It’d depend on his age, personality, and your relationship with him! When he’s younger he’d probably be embarrassed, when he was grown he’d probably be more casual or happy about it.

will you be able to date baxter in step 3 while at crush with cove (but not dating him ofc) sorry if this has been asked already. i really love baxters step 4 design btw!! 

Yeah, you can be crushing on Cove and date Baxter if you weren’t already dating Cove. You just can’t be truly in love with Cove and then switch to Baxter.

I just got my friend into our life, and they adore shiloh and derek sooo will there be more of them in the second game? 

I’m afraid not. But you can see plenty more of Shiloh in XOXO Droplets/XOXO Blood Droplets, haha.

I see you haven't gotten any xoxo droplets asks recently but I'm still obsessed with these boys!! I was just wondering if Nate would curse under any circumstance? 

Yeah, Nate does use certain swear words (damn, hell, bastard) on very rare occasions.

Hi there! I have a question about the wedding dlc. Will we be able to plan a honeymoon during the planning stages of it or would it be something that Cove and the mc would rather plan later on? Thank you! Absolutly love the game by the way, definitely one of my favorite games! 

The focus will be on the wedding day itself. The topic of the honeymoon might come up a bit, but there won’t be any choosing of the exact location and such.

Hi! I have two questions and it's completely understandable if you only answer one/neither and I'm sorry if you've already answered either before! First, is there a set year in which OL:B&A takes place (ex: Step 1 being set in 2010 & Step 2 being set in 2016, etc.) or is it simply up to interpretation? Second, have you guys thought about doing a coming-of-age game where the MC has a tough home life or upbringing? (like one of their parents is an addict, a parent being transphobic whilst the player has the option to be trans, or having friends that are influencing them to do drugs, etc.) That's all! Thanks for making beautiful games. <3 

There is a set timeline!

Step 1: 2006 Step 2: 2011 Step 3: 2016 Step 4: 2021 

And we don’t currently plan on making a game like that. The Our Life series exists to be a safer environment for people to play around in and if we did do a brand new series that was harsher edged it’d be something more fantastical and/or plot-driven instead of a different type of modern day slice-of-life growing up story. I’m sorry.

i don’t know if you’ve already answered this, but do you have a guess on when phase 4 will come out? as well as ol2? i’m so excited for both of them, the inclusivity in this game is amazing, you guys should be really proud of it! 

Step 4 will be coming out very soon! OL2 is gonna take until 2023 to be anywhere near completion. But we might episodically release the Steps one at a time as they get done instead of waiting for three to be finished before launch like we did with the first game.

Hello, I was curious if there was an official or unofficial discord server for the game? 

We do have a discord! You can join by clicking this link HERE.

how long do you plan to keep ol's patreon running? 

Hopefully for at least a few more years.

Are you considering ever making merch? 

Yeah, but I don’t know when it’ll happen or what exactly we’ll make, aha. It’s something we want do, just nothing is set.

hi! i just found out about your game a couple of days ago on tiktok (so sorry if you’ve already answered this question) and i was wondering if y’all are ever planning to release it on iOS? 

I have no idea. It’s hard for a small group to get Apple approval and I honestly can’t say if it’ll ever happen or not. Maybe someday, though!

Hi, I love the art style of Our life and I would like to know if the artist has a Twitter? Also, could it be possible to fund more CGs for the game from him/her? So many times, I wish there was one like when the cutscene of the sunshower. 

That’s nice of you to offer. He doesn’t have a Twitter, at least not one that’s public enough to be shared with me. And I’m afraid not. The issue is that the CGs take huge amounts of time rather than there not being a budget for it. He’s gotta make CGs for Step 4, the DLCs, and new character sprites, too. There isn’t space in the schedule for even more. Sorry for that.

Hi, how are you?!

Are you planning on accepting new writers or is it always the same people who write your stories??

Thanks!!

Our Life: Beginnings & Always won’t be getting new writers, but we will be hiring a new team of writers for Our Life: Now & Forever eventually!

perhaps this counts as nsfw and I'm sure it has been answered before but what does Cove prefer, chests/boobs or butts? or perhaps both :3c thank you for this wonderful game (and the patreon bonus moment, it was worth all the waiting and more ♥) 

He’s a “chests of all shapes and sizes” kind of guy, haha.

i was wondering- did any of the writers actually grow up by the beach? as someone who's lived in a beach town all their life it really did feel nostalgic to play through our life 1 

I was born and raised in Cali! Though, not right by the beach. We still had to make trips out, but the setting is based on my own childhood memories of small beach towns we went through.

In Derek’s upcoming DLC, will we be able to reference the pact we made as teens? (love olba and xod/xobd so much btw you’re literally amazing) 

Yep, you will be able to talk about that!

Oh, sorry about the Cole being secretly L ask, then!

If you wanted context: Death Note is about this one guy who finds a notebook that kills anyone who you write the name of in there. The guy eventually develops a God Complex and starts mass killing criminals and stuff. L is the one trying to find out who is killing all these people.

Me and my sister first joked about it because I couldn't remember how to translate a word about the way Cove was sitting, so I just did the pose, and it looked a lot like how L himself sits! Then we just snowballed from there, with more and more nonsense connections.

That’s okay! Thanks for explaining. I’m sorry I didn’t know what you meant.

[mrsmorality]

so, the best books i’ve read in my whole life so far:

- captive prince [trilogy]: of course i have to debut the list with them (even if the order of the books doesn't match my order of preference). it was simply the first that came to my mind, so commendable and memorable is the story. if you haven't read it yet, do it NOW. the best enemies to lovers of all the time, with a development worthy of a round of applause and a strong and supportive relationship on both sides. yes, captive prince. you know you’ll always be on my mind!

- the song of achilles: yeah. i could never forget this one. is the most realistic love story i have ever laid my eyes on, full of obstacles and sacrifices. i really liked what the author did here, abandoning the historical narrative that achilles and patroclus were just friends or even relatives. she gave a whole new meaning to the story, never failing to keep the original line. there isn't ONE thing about this book that doesn't fill my eyes. the best childhood best friends to lovers, showing their relationship since they were just friends in childhood, to the blossoming of feelings that went beyond fraternal affection, and the way they handled it as they grew up. it's beautiful. i really love it

- all for the game [trilogy]: i mean. of course this story could never be missing from my favorites list. what i like the most about the story is what's hidden behind the relationship between the characters. their feelings aren't obvious and usual, and if you're looking for a light story, this isn't for you. it's all heavy: the way they relate to each other, the way they deal with their own problems, their pasts. they’re broken people trying to put the pieces together, trying to figure out what to do with the glue they were offered. even so, they still find room in their minds to care (in distorted, but still, care) for their friends, teammates, lovers, and family members; they still protect each other, like one big dysfunctional family. everything about this book is not in the narrated words, but in what lies behind them: what lies behind each moment, each pause and each action. it is obvious, but subliminal, almost hidden. i love it. really. the complexity behind each character, his shaken psyche -- it's all breathtaking, it's all about keeping the attention. it can be hard to get past the first few pages but, man, once you do it's impossible to stop. also enemies to lovers

- the raven boys [tetralogy]: ok so i don't have enough words to describe or synthesize all my feelings for this book. i love every part of it: from the first sentence, that introductory line, to the last, the laudable ending. the story is impeccable, as is the plot on which it is based. the development of a course of action as well as the characters' relationship and their own conceptions of themselves and the world are simply things that appeal to me. the characters are amazing, real and liveable, and the bond of friendship they share is enviable. their love relationships, even if they're not all the book talks about, are breathtaking and make your heart flutter and melt. the key to the story is also hidden behind the action of the characters, behind silent cares and concerns, but there, always present. i love adam and ronan. i love how their relationship developed (friends to lovers), the patience with which it was structured, building slowly, before your eyes, under your nose -- but you didn't see it until the characters' feelings became more obvious to themselves and to each other, and began to submerge and overflow through every paragraph, every line of thought. it's beautiful. it's absolutely beautiful.

- autoboyography: this is among the books that came to me at an opportune time, so i have a huge connection to this story. it wouldn't be here if it didn't deserve it, and it does; this story is about love, about accepting it, and about reconciling that love, such a vital part of you, with religion and ingrained prejudices. it's a story you versus the world, you versus what you thought you were, what you wanted to be. it's about accepting that about yourself, so that you can be true to yourself, to the people you love. in the process, people who say they love you back will not always support your discovery or encourage your self-acceptance. this book is also about how we have to accept ourselves, regardless of what others think about it, because their opinion, however important, should never be everything, or overshadow your own opinion, your own wishes and desires. love is in innate acceptance, or at least the quest for understanding. it is in the understanding that the person is what he is, and that should be applauded, rather than just tolerated or ignored. this should be encouraged and cause for joy. you should never stop being who you are because of other people’s opinion, as long as you feel comfortable showing it. this book is about self-discovery and tolerance, in a world that represses the first and fakes the second. strangers to friends to lovers.

- we are the ants: this book is not a novel, although there is the development of one in the backstory. this book is about dealing with mishaps, with veiled depression, with a lack of faith and hope not just in the world around you, but in yourself. self-doubt is the worst thing, the most discouraging thing. if you don't believe in yourself, don't think yourself worthy of happiness or good things, how will you appreciate the world and how will you accept such things when it offers it to you? this book is a great journey. reality is behind every moment and bad and hopeless thought represented in every paragraph, but the journey continues, day after day, through the feeling that there is more in the world than what you are experiencing, that things can be better tomorrow. in friendships and in love lies a little willpower that recharges you for another day, for another obstacle that can bring you down (and that's okay. we fall and get up day after day, and that's okay), but not even that and it all. you must believe in yourself to fully revitalize yourself, to keep your feet on the ground and stand firmly on your feet, no matter how hard the world tries to bring you down. this book is about choices and the lack of it. it is about pain and depression, which is not always obvious, which you are not always aware of. it's about everything and nothing. it's about getting up after successive falls, when all you wanted was to stay on the ground. it doesn't matter if your legs are shaky when you get up, or if, as soon as you get your balance back, the world hits you and knocks you down again. keep getting up. as long as you are alive, you can still choose and try to realize how you want to live, what you want to be. nothing is definitive. bad feelings don't last forever (not even the good ones). life is cyclical, but with good company, a few glances at the bluish or gray sky, feelings that rise in your chest, discovering things you've never experienced, the wind in your hair -- things you never cared or paid attention to, minimal things, but that keeps you -- it's worth every takedown. strangers to friends to lovers

[awkwxrdapple]

Fallen Angel (Part 1) - Peter Parker x reader

Request: Hi! I love your writing! I was hoping you could do a peter x reader where the reader gets badly hurt and captured and it takes a long time for the avengers and peter to find her and once they do, she is scared half to death, jumpy, nervous, and stays by Peter's side during pretty much everything. They are living in the avengers tower with everyone and since they are the youngest, Peter is particularly protective of her during her recovery. Thank you!

Word count: 1.6k 

WARNINGS: mentions of anxiety, light torture, injury, trauma (after reading if you think I should include any others please let me know thank you)

Part 1

Simultaneously, you removed your headphones and slammed the textbook shut in front of you. Your assignments were getting tiring. It wasn't that they were hard and you were struggling, it was just that after being part of the Avengers, doing calculus and algebra seemed too easy for you. You could do it easily, but after all that you had done and seen already in your life, you knew your time could be better spent. 

Being the youngest Avenger alongside Peter Parker was exciting. You felt unbelievably honoured to be given the opportunity to be part of a team that did wonderfully amazing things. You had made friends for life, and most especially so with Peter. When you had come to New York you were enrolled into the same school as Peter. Midtown High was a good school and you enjoyed it, it also meant spending more time with Peter even though you both lived in the Avengers Tower now. 

Lying back against your bed you realised you were hungry, you'd been studying for what felt like ages. 

Knowing you had nothing sweet that you wanted to eat in the tower you decided that a quick trip out would let you get what you needed. If you were going to carry on studying you were going to need all the help you could get. 

Grabbing your purse from your dresser, you wandered down the corridor to where Peter's room was. The door was slightly open but you knocked anyway and waited for his reply. 

"Hey, I was just going to go to the store, do you want anything?" 

He, like you had just been, was sitting on his bed with papers strewn around him. When he saw you he gave you a warm smile. Having Peter living with you in the Avengers tower was amazing. Peter really was your best friend and you trusted no one more in the world. 

"I'm ok, but thank you. What are you going for?"

"Chocolate, ice cream, cake, anything." You said. 

"Homework giving you a hard time too?"

"Is it that obvious?" You laughed before placing your hand on the door handle again. "I'll see you in a bit."

"Bye Y/N."

Taking the elevator it didn't take too long to get to the ground floor and out into the centre of New York. You knew there was a little grocery store a few blocks over that made homemade chocolate cake. 

Unknowing to you, a set of eyes were watching you leave the tower, cross the street and make your way down the sidewalk. It was busy, and you were tired. Your instincts were slower and less aware of your surroundings. The one set of eyes soon became two, then three, then four. You were blissfully unaware of the imminent danger you were about to find yourself in. 

Taking a swift left at the next building you passed, your face collided with a hard arm and sent you stumbling backwards. Jolted out of your oblivious state, you raised your guard and lunged to land a punch square into your attackers chest. They struck back, using their larger build to throw their weight towards you forcing you to the ground. The air was knocked out of your lungs. 

Kicking back up from underneath them you tried to force their body off you, but they were heavy, and armed. You could feel a gun strapped to their hip pressing into yours. Rapid footsteps were heard around you as more people wearing a similar black combat suit to your assailant emerged and began to hold you down. You continued to fight in any way you could but soon all your limbs were rendered useless. 

"You're coming with us. Don't try to resist." A low male voice spoke into your ear as a cloth was placed over your face, a strong smell evaded your nostrils and then you relaxed back into the concrete. 

+ + +

Upon waking, you found yourself cold, aching and stiff. Your head hung towards your chest and a dull throb emanated from your forehead and rang throughout your skull. Your hands were tied behind you back and placed behind a chair, with your legs also tied to the chair legs completely restricting all of your movement. 

Fear and panic flooded through you and your chest became horrifically tight. The room around you was incredibly dim, with the only light coming from a single dull light bulb above your head. Feeling your breathing become hastened you remembered your training.

Don't panic. Be calm. Assess the situation.

The situation looked bleak. There were no sounds to be heard so you couldn't even begin to work out where you were being held. You remembered the last memory of being free, but couldn't place the people from anyone or thing you had seen before. 

You weren't kept guessing for long as a door creaked open to your left and two figures entered the room. The door was roughly closed behind them and a click of the lock was distinctly heard. You nervously swallowed and waited for one of them to speak. 

"We hope you aren't too badly hurt, Y/N." One spoke and made his way over to you. His voice was calm, and in any other situation you would have mistaken him for a nice man. 

"How do you know my name?" You ignored what he had actually just said to you. It was far more disturbing that your first name was known to these people. 

"That doesn't matter. We may know a few things about you, but you know much more than we do about things important to us."

"And those would be?"

The other man laughed coldly at your attempt to sound confident. 

"Your friends." The first man now knelt down a meter away from where you were sat. 

"My friends?"

"The Avengers."

To this you had nothing to say. You instantly felt guilt at being caught in this way, no other member of the team would be trapped like this. It made you ashamed. These people needed you for whatever heinous reason they had. 

"We understand you know a great deal about the runnings of that Tower, and of the inner workings of the group itself." The man continued. "We think you would be very useful to us."

"I won't tell you anything."

This brought a sigh from him. It was almost sarcastic. 

"We thought you would say that." 

He stood up and took a few steps backwards, allowing the other man to walk into your focus. 

"Maybe this will change your mind."

The first strike to your face stung. The next hurt. The third, numb. The intensity of the punch quickly removed all feeling. You could taste your own blood as your lip was cut upon the second blow. 

"It… it won't change my mind." You spluttered. Tears welled up in your eyes but you were not going to give them the satisfaction. You would never betray your friends, your family. 

"We shall see."

+  +  +

"Has anyone seen Y/N?" 

Peter was worried. You had left the tower four hours ago, and still had yet to return. 

"No I haven't, why?" Nat answered him as she wandered into the shared living room and kitchen space. 

Peter told her that you'd told him you were quickly going to the store and that you weren't back. 

"I'm sure she will come back soon. Maybe she ran into a friend?" Steve offered as he sat holding a mug of black coffee. 

"Yeah… you're right." Peter tried not to think about it too much. But after an hour or so that he hadn't heard you walk down the corridor, he went to check your room to find it empty. And he couldn't find you anywhere in the tower. 

Wanda gave Peter a small smile. She had seen how close you two had become. It was only natural that Peter was concerned. 

"If she isn't back tomorrow morning, we shall then worry, yeah kid?" Tony walked behind Peter and placed a brief hand on his shoulder. 

"Ok…"

The next morning resulted in Peter's worry increasing exponentially. He had sent you multiple texts and phoned you many times to receive no response. Usually you would let him know if you were staying with a friend. The whole situation seemed off. 

"Still no sign of Y/N?" Tony asked as Peter wandered through the kitchen on his way to school. 

"No. I am worried." 

Tony considered Peter for a second. 

"Come with me, I might be able to find her." Tony stated and headed for the elevator. "School is important, but it can wait."

Walking into one of Tony's labs, Peter realised he hadn't been into this one before. Tony tapped on a screen and brought up a map of New York on one of the monitors. 

"Mr Stark, what is this?"

"I regret not telling you sooner but I have tapped yours and Y/N's phones. So even when it's off, it can be tracked."

"You're going to track her phone?"

"I think that's what I just said." Tony raised his eyebrows. "Let's see if she still has it with her." He could see how upsetting this was to Peter. He began to wonder if you two were just friends, or something more.

After putting more information into the computer a yellow dot appeared on the map, quite far from the Tower, but still within the city. 

"Is that her?" Peter asked urgently. 

"It should be. I don't like the fact she's in a decommissioned warehouse though."

Peter suddenly felt a sudden urge to drop everything and run to you. 

"According to this, the signal hasn't moved in 12 hours." Tony turned round to face Peter. 

Peter's jaw was tight. Tony could tell he was ready to fight. 

If you would like to be in the tag list for part 2 or any of my other Peter Parker imagines please let me know! 

"Alright kid, suit up."

PART 2

Tag list: @unmistakablyunknown

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