#you wanna love death and give him a little kiss hmmmmmm

[crabcasino]

widow

(no veil under the cut)

[anpanham]

Hazbin Hotel character thoughts / impressions (Episodes 1 & 2)

1/12/24

UM. what a weird first actual post for my blog for this year... this is long, and i miss making ACTUAL blog posts instead of small threads... And i've explained on my twitter my thoughts on Hazbin / Helluva from a critical standpoint and artist from art separation, yadda yadda yadda---

ANYWAY... Episodes 1 and 2 of Hazbin are (Officially) out now, and i have some thoughts on the characters i wrote down after watching (In bullet points, because most of these are fresh-from-the-brain thoughts i wrote on my tablet from my bed)

(Spoiler alert, Sir Pentious isn't ruined and I AM SO GLAD. my snake babygirl... ilu)

Read on, if you wanna, spoiler warning btw!!!!!

CHARLIE NOTES

-Charlie is good., Charlie is cute, but i fear for her safety, not everyone can new redeemed. she's like steven universe at points i stg 😭 (not a jab but i think it's funny)

-i like how they gave Charlie bags under her eyes a lot, she is a tired princess just like all of us

-She gives off elementary school teacher vibes but in a wholesome way

-Charlie's hair is SO CUTE MESSY..

-PERFECT voice /gen

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- VAGGIE NOTES

-GIRLBOSS (still, but more)

-Vaggie is still cool, she just loves her gf and is sick of everyone's bs but is still supportive...

-If she doesn't get into a bloody death match with Alastor (and win) i will be disappointed /hj

She doesn't seem to have as much of a temper as she did in the pilot, but seems more dead inside

-Good voice!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ANGEL DUST NOTES

-Angel... hm. Angel. he's Angel, for sure. Hi, Angel!

Insecure about a lot, but also YOU CAN BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT!!!!! if vox doesn't kill val angel should. please and thank u.

Also his voice is alright, just need to get used to it a little more

Also i hope he's not too bratty jealous of sirpent / whoever else charlie praises because again, it's ON HIM TO COOPERATE WITH HER CAUSE MORE??? ignoring his other stress sources (Val)

-Waiting for him and Husk to kiss. I know it's coming

-Just fucking block Val's number and rip up the contract (YES i know it goes deeper than that...)

-NUGGS. I SCREECHED IRL /POS

THEY GAVE HIM A HEART ON HIS BUTT!!!!! S TIER REDESIGN

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

ALASTOR NOTES

-At first i was kinda Eh about his voice but it's grown on me, the radio filter is a little more subtle than the pilot but it's still there which i'm glad for

Delightfully passive aggressive

-Weird magic still, there doesn't seem to be any limits to it... we need to know what his weakness is...!!!!! please (maybe that will come later??) ....... i theorize he has underworld contact (Shadow-world, because of the shadow imagery?) , the underworld might be different from Hell maybe? (Where do those fucking tentacles come from, also weird monochrome demons)

-Interesting he was gone for 7 years. 7 is an angelic number. HMMMMMM (sealed away by angels somehow??)

-Punchable (Vaggie please)

-Weirdly enjoyable and not genuinely hateable like some of the other characters, but i also want to see his demise, maybe his sadism is rubbing off on me, but i want to see it badly...

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

SIR PENTIOUS NOTES

-Sir Pentious... u are so good.. probably has some of the best writing so far, maybe... he's my favorite so. hhHHmm

his voice is different but at the same time it's what you'd expect, i like it a lot... so silly, i pat him and his silly hat

-Pathetic old man. You win my heart (50x as much)

-Only one egg spoke so far, i wonder if they'll all have unique voices this time (the Japanese dub of the pilot did that lol)

-Genuinely a joy every moment he was onscreen (Too fucking cute... GRRRR)

-How did he get into contact with Vox? Why would Vox want anything to do with him if he thinks he's a loser? (I guess easy access into the Hotel) ...Fuck em either way (DON'T BE MEAN TO SNAKE MAN)

-Cool temporary stunning hypnosis, maybe we'll see him coil and bite next, the snake attack traits are fun

-His autism vibes grow stronger and it's canon in my heart

-We LOVE a redemption song. please stay in the hotel with everyone, don't fuck it up!!! you're a good noodle.... 😭 The song was genuinely so cute... it's probably going to be the highlight of EVERYTHING for me, besides Nuggs..

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

HUSK NOTES

-i luv u kitty

-His voice is different but captures "Grumpy old alcoholic" perfectly

-His heart needs to be melted...

-Him holding the script in front of the camera was great

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- NIFFTY NOTES

-Niffty is a BIG COWARD. you can still love a "Bad boy" who's a redeemed bad boy!!!! just because he's not morally bad doesn't Not make him a Bad Boy. fuck u (i still like you)

-Her voice is really cute, also her nightgown.. though finding out she doesn't have dark bug limbs but is just wearing gloves and stockings surprised me more than it should've... put them back

-Also autism vibes, love it

-She still frightens me a bit

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

V TRIO NOTES

VOX -----

-Seems to carry the team, voice has grown on me

-I can't stop looking at his weird finger claws, they almost look like

he's just wearing things over his fingers, i dig it

-Interesting hypnosis power, i assume Alastor is immune

-Why can't Alastor and Vox just compromise and create a podcast?

-Hates Val (sorry shippers) ,,... kind of expected it since in old official sources it's been shown that he's been abused by Val too

-This isn't a note but everytime Alastor said "THE TV IS BUFFERING~" in their duet, the player kept fucking up 😭

-Decent song, I like seeing him and Al argue

-I surprisingly don't hate him! i'm glad. i wanted to like him (though, it's only been 2 episodes so far...)

------

VALENTINO ---------

-More manchild vibes than i expected tbh

-Voice is alright but his accent is weirdly inconsistent for some reason???? interesting direction

-His manipulation is shown well in the voicemail scene with Angel, he's literally got the "Nice Guy" energy

-Surprisingly didn't order Vox around as much as i thought he would

-Why does he have girl Fizzy bots...

-Die?

------

VELVETTE

-Fashion design isn't something i expected, but then again i didn't know that much about her prior other than she's obsessed with social media

-British is also not what i expected but cool

-Uh. she didn't really stick out to me that much...sorry..... she's fine tho

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ADAM & LUTE NOTES

-Personally do not like how these angels look so menacing, i get that they're technically bad, but... make them look more angelic besides halos and wings??? they could easily be mistaken for hell residents. Also again, i feel like angels should swear less and drop swears in critical / good timed moments, it would be funnier... subtlety is not a thing i guess

-Adam's guitar solo was good tho, not really feeling his character tho, he's just an asshole but that's the point

-Adam looks like the fucking dress meme. I can't unsee it

-Lute is pretty...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

KATIE KILLJOY & TOM TRENCH NOTES

-Brandon Rodgers

-They sure were there for a second!

-i luv tom

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

All in all...

Episode 1: 6-7/10

Episode 2: 8.5/10

[savnofilter]

Kinktober Day 9

Natsuo ➷ Midoriya ➷ Kirishima ➷ Fatgum ➷ Shinso  ➷ Tamaki ➷ Todoroki ➷ Bakugo ➷ Shindo ➷ Giran ➷  Dabi ➷ Shigaraki ➷ All For One 

☠️ warning(s): ⚠️ everything between both parties is consensual. ⚠️ 𝕤𝕠𝕞𝕟𝕠𝕡𝕙𝕚𝕝𝕚𝕒, con/dubcon.

☠️ genre: smut, holiday special.

☠️ words: 260+ [about one minute each].

☠️ read more: kinktober(uary)

☠️ summary: instead of the original fic idea, i swapped it out with somnophilia hcs,,, enjoy.

Natsuo (x)

giving:

wellllll since i dont know much about him i dont feel like he’s really into it. Up to your choices tbh.

feel like once on a blue moon he’ll wake up and decide he wants his dick in you like a thermometer or just finger you until you wake up.

isnt really something you guys discussed, he kinda just admired how beautiful you are.

if hes ever feeling freaky-deaky mayhaps he’ll eat you out,,,

he fucking loves it when you reciprocate his touches, it urges him to continue and tease you more. 

honestly just being able to pleasure you himself is what gets him rock hard, he doesnt even want anything in return he just wants to hear your sighs and moans.

natsuo's first just cause ion feel like it's something he does every day, more like once in a while just to tease you~

receiving:

to dooont talk about receiving --, hes a sucker for waking up with his pp in your mouth. 🤭

he likes to flex it when it's in, pushing you just a little lower just to hear you gag a bit. 

"Sorry babe, couldn't help myself~"

…. well thats aight with me-

isnt big on full-on making you choke on him but if you wake him with the glawk glawk 3000 he’ll have a brighter day. 

hes a Todoroki so just know he has the gene being a sadistic teaser. 

if you wake him up with cock warming he will literally marry you while he destroys your guts.

he likes somnophilia 11/10. 

Midoriya (x, x)

giving:

Midoriya is mostly timid, already having the consent talk between you two but hes still nervous.

oftentimes he just grinds up against you and keeps you close, but sometimes his hands do wander in other places.

when he first starts to experiment, he likes to soft kiss your neck and rubs his hips against you softly.

he might squeeze your breasts here and there to tease you, hands snaking under your shirt to feel your warm skin against his calloused and strong hands.

like headcanon before, Midoriya doesnt like to do penetration until he knows he has your full-on consent.

hes sweet but dont expect him to go full on soft with you lol. 

forbiddddddd Midoriya chooses oral because this boi will go for how long it takes his tongue to get tired. 

and thats not very easy. 

he loves to admire your body so most often he does it out of the,,, love he has. 🥴

and hes a closet perv too. 

receiving:

if you give it to him -- instant NUT. no cap. 

he'll be like "H-Honey" and then tense up and just nut.

but ofc being the good s/o you are, you still continue because youre a good s/o like that. 

bonus points if you treat him like hes a dirty perv for liking it, also gets on his subside if you really wanna degrade him too. 

some times when hes awake enough he can have the dom energy but most times her cant help but be a pillow prince for you~~

and he doesnt mind either. he enjoys it. there's something down inside him that just helps him sleep at night that you use him for your pleasure and his. 

there's just a whole lot to unwrap here. ;)

Kirishima (x)

giving:

hm.

to place Kirishima in third being hes the type to stay up like an hour after youve fallen asleep and stick his cock in you so he can feel you grind up against every few times throughout the night. 

gives you a few encouraging thrusts before he does fall asleep just to give your body a bit of a head start. 

wraps his arms around your waist to ensure you cant escape him. 😳

of course since he is like this, somnophilia has been discussed between you two so he's not on full on creep mode. 

sometimes he'll wake you up by just pounding into you at full send. 

likes to tease sensitive parts of your body just to get you to wake up,,, bites marks littered on your skin as well. 

hes careless and the only thing he is really focused on is? hes not sure. he just know he fucking loves doing it with you too. 

best part is when he records and then faps to the footage later-

but what can he do, he likes to cherish every moment you two share ~

receiving:

oh please wake him up like that. 

he has no qualms if its him in your mouth or you taking him inside you he just wants it. 

when you wake up him like that he honestly feels like maybe there is someone up there. 

is such a moaner. 

he likes it when youre a little rough too, cant help but be a masochist when he wakes up smh. 

if you ride him please let him choke on your fingers -- better yet have your ass face his direction so he can do whatever he wants with your lower parts as well. 

even when you are giving he still wants to reciprocate as well, he loves to have your pleasured whenever you two get busy.

most times when you engage in somnophilia it has to be days when he has off. why? he might just go all day. 

pleasure him, but do it wisely. 🤧

Fat gum (x)

giving:

taishiro is the type of guy to like put his dick in your mouth lol. 

not even like get you slicked up or anything, just cock in mouth. 

probably gets you semi undressed before he gropes you like a creep, getting his cock hard before opening your sleeping mouth and slipping his dick into your mouth.

makes you choke on his cock to wake you up, enjoying it when you dont have time to hide your gag reflex and watch as you try and get use to his tip pressing at the back of your throat. 

half of the time, taishiro doesnt even wake you up. he plays with you just to get you wet and stinky.

sometimes he diddles himself and cums on you just to have you confused when you wake up. 

honestly beats Midoriya at being a closet pervert, but does he really try to hide it?

receiving:

hmmmmmm

he doesnt really care to receive it. 

sure it's a very nice surprise to wake up to but he prefers it when hes the one playing with you. 

likes it better if youre taking him with one of your lower holes just because he already has enough experience with your mouth wrapped around his cock. 

if riding him manages to wake him up, teasing him wont go on for any longer. he has no choice but to take over and just ran your brains out. 

when hes done flipping the script and you both are satisfied you more out of shape than him, he'll be like,

"Welp, crepe for breakfast?"

Shinso (x)

giving:

oral central

i cant think of shinso having his ding-ding be the first thing to tease you when you wake up with fingers and oral. no and's, no but's. 

he doesnt like to rush you up on waking up, more with the smooth process and it isnt really doing it for a reaction.

he just wants to toy with you.

honestly, like fat gum he does it so youre usually in a confused state when you wake up. horny but not knowing why and knowing full-well you didnt have a wet dream either. 

its not until a few more times of him doing it is when you realize it's his doing and that in itself has you in a blushing mess. 

not expecting that from him at all but not complaining. 😳

sometimes you dress just a little provocatively just to inspire him~

receiving:

if you dont wake him up with his cock in your mouth hes gonna have a bad day. >:(

jk, he respecs wamen. 

deadass do it once and he might just marry you. 

if youre doing a little under par from what you usually do, he'll just have to nudge yah a lil, push you on, use his quirk. 

"Fuck -- just like that kitten~"

WELL DAMN IF YOU DIDNT WANT TO SUCK THE SOUL OUT OF HIM ALREADY-

he doesnt really care if you wake him up like that, much appreciated but he doesnt really care. 

i mean if you do, just get ready for an early morning of face fucking… just saying. 

Tamaki (x)

giving:

yall aint ready for this one. 

some people may say, 'aw tamaki would wake up s/o and just cuddle her to death uwu<3", while yes he will, dont underestimate him.

to think of him in somnophilia is where we break the closet pervert ends. 

hes more of like, i really like my dick and i really like you so i’ll just go on and fuck you awake.

theres on lead up or anything, he’ll full on give you brain or just fuck you as if you are awake, apologising profusely once you do wake up.

“I-I’m s-sorry to wake you like this… I couldn’t help myself…”

he’ll never fully use quirk on you while you sleep though. thats a big nope from him.

when he sexs you up he wants it to be fully him… and only him.

(i mean its his quirk from him -- but you get the point!)

CEO of going till ya numb.

his favorite his sticking his dick into you and rutting into you like a dog in a rut. 

definitely is a groper. cannot and will not convince me otherwise.

he just really loves it when you moan out for him and make cute noises~ its all he needs to start off for a good day.

receiving:

well, it definitely is a pleasant surprise.

doesnt affect him like he does when he wakes you up but he appreciates your efforts.

most times when hes conscience enough he’ll just take over as if you werent trying to surprise him before.

honestly if youre looking for an early pounding thats the best time and way to get him into action.

since he sees it as teasing he cant help but have to pay you back.

he’ll be straight up clapping dem cheeks and he’ll just be like “you feel so fucking good” with the nicest sounding moan anyone can mumble into your ear.

yeah…. I encourage doing it to him. 

gets him nice and possessive giving you both a good time while he can live out his lil dom fantasies for the day.

//win win.

Todoroki (x, x)

receiving:

hes like a blushing mess.

if you couldnt see him as a sub before, well get ready for this.

catch him off guard and guarantee youll get a completely different Shouto.

he turns into a full on pillow prince, with no shame. As long as you focus on getting him off he’ll let you do what he wants.

if you especially focus on his soft spots that dont have to do with his nipples or the third leg between his legs that when youll get him puddy under your hands.

“Y-Y/N..~”

well shit, say your name like that and he might make you revert submissive behaviour too.

you treat him like a perfect lil’ prince whenever he does, wanting to pamper him anyways.

on a rare chance could you spark him into flipping the tables but thats more on a random occurrence more than anything.

note to self: sub Sho? surprise him.. ✍️

Bakugo (x, x)

giving: 

this one is kindaaaa tricky.

now, Katsuki wont do it often. but when he does it, he does it with uhh,,,, passion. if you would like to call it that.

he mimics all the spots you loved to be touched when youre awake just to see how long it takes for your body to wake up and realize that hes playing with you.

calculated in his actions, obviously. hes not some idiot who rushes, everything he does is precise whether or not you know it.

because of this, being able to please you is easy so his clear motive? not very sure….

maybe it's to see you squirm and wake up? mayhaps to see what pure pleasure looks like written over your face. who knows, all you knew is that he always had a smug look on his face when he was able to make you cum by the end of it. 

thats if…. he let you that is.

receiving:

sort of like Todoroki, you may just get him to be the whole bottom in the term, "power bottom". 

tries to hold in moans and groans but usually fails which makes him sooooo frustrated. 

if he gets too flustered he'll make you stop and give whatever you have him by tenfold. 

brace yourself for a long and bumpy ride, you may have to do it on days he isnt going to work that day because he'll sure rock you out of this world. 

best if done on holidays as well, itll leave you walking a lil awkward for a few days. 

and of course, that isnt okay for being on the job is it?

Shindo (x)

giving: 

ddjhvbjhvb

hes this high on the list for a reason.

ongggggggg he’ll tease the ever living shit out of you until he gets bored or decides youve earned it.

damn snarky wont even prep your body or anything, just straight out the cut uses his quirk just to get your senses all riled up. 

does everything on the scale of full on senses to just barely touching you. 

his teasing always wakes you up into a confused state that is wanting to more, shamelessly begging for him to continue.

he carries great pride in taking responsibility in getting you like this. but dont be mistakened! he will not go easier on you just because you woke up. 

you had only just felt the pre-course to the real action~

buckle up, kitten. 

receiving:

nope. if youre going to take advantage of him, he wants to fully aware. 

… for sadistic reasons more than consensual. 

Giran (x)

giving:

this old fucking man. 

likes to sneak in and just feel you up good. 

of course he doesnt want through his back out so yknow- im just kidding. 

giran will go to town if he has to. 

but most times, the old fart just loves to, "make love" to his darling. 

calls you sweet petnames in your ear as you sleep, just so you can dream about you too. 

he knows how to tease and play with you. he can finish the job without even so much as stirring you awake. 

hes studied you long enough and has played with you enough to make you finish as well. 

it's magic honestly, and his best part is leaving you with the mess between your legs and nothing but confusion written all over your face. 

how could he know that's your reaction although he leaves before you can wake up? 

simple. hes always has his ways~

receiving:

the few rare times he let's you into his humble abode is when you decide to treat him. 

really adament of sucking him off to wake him up just to see his early morning smile. 

him rewarding you with giving you the same treatment or dirty praise is all you need before you leave and act as if you werent sleeping around with a villain recruiter and his #1 sugar baby for that matter. 

when you surprise him in his study is the real kicker. 

youve been under his desk many times to be familiar with the spot and assume the position. 

you usually bring up breakfast or dinner (whichever time you arrive) and wake him up in the good way that motivates him to continue on with his stressful job.

surely, he can never thank you enough. if it wasnt for your efforts, he wouldnt know how to deal with himself~

Dabi (x, x)

giving:

✨ rise n shine, dabi's fat cock is here to wake you up. ✨

this asshole -- this asshole. 

has no shame at all. he knows full well what hes doing. 

likes to feel you up and just feel at you sometimes. hes so touch starved that he cant even help it. 

he ranges from teasing you till you wake up to full-on fucking your brains out. 

of course he enjoys it when youre confused but wanting more, your body more than ready to receive his hands. 

at some point, you just like to tease him for it too. usually he catches onto your game and plays accordingly. 

he cant help but feel blessed that someone he loves so very much could enjoy the same interests he does as well. 

just let him know you like it when he feels you up and he'll give it to you anytime you ask~

receiving:

would not recommend unless you want early-morning-face fucking.

like you wouldnt catch someone wake up from something like that faster than Dabi. 

you may wonder why, it's just his touch starved nature. im telling you, it responds to anything. 

no matter what position, how you do it you will get a positive reaction from him. 

tell me you cant imagine him moaning, "that's it, doll~ swallow my cock like the slut you are~"

IN A SLEEPY RASPY VOICE??? HELLO 🤧

this man is just a walking breathing example of what the word simp feels like. 

youre supposed to turn away because hes not the type of guy to fall in love with but most times like this is when you cant help it..

Shigaraki (x, x)

giving:

master diddler, yes he is. 

hes the type to not even stick his cock in, just like hump at you like a needy animal and just mark up your neck as if he hasnt had sex in years. 

is the type to use other parts of your body to get off just to avoid pleasuring you as he gets off.

youll wake up to his cum in various spots. between your legs, on your chest and even your armpits. if it has a place where his cock can fit its going there.

he doesnt give a shit if you fuss about it later, “why didn’t you cum inside” headass.

youll have to earn him using you like cocksleeve the proper way.

youre either a heavy sleeper or light because you can wake up as soon as he starts or wake up after hes done.

Either way, as long as he can see the pureness on your expression is all he needs to help his perverse needs.

Shigaraki isnt the person to use you during your sleep without having at least talked it with you.

yeah hes a creep but hes not that weird.

likes to whisper degrading stuff into your ear when you sleep just so you can dream about what hes doing to you, his hands not stopping a moment as he gets off to feeling you up.

just dont expect anything less then degenerate from him 

receiving:

you have to be a special type of breed to even think about touching him without him being in control.

the thought of you possibly being able to one-up him is a no-no.

he wont allow it.

if he even senses you thinking about it he’ll stir awake and glare at you as if there is no tomorrow.

but say you do manage to catch him off guard, this may be the only times you can really edge a moan out of him of.

so use your time wisely.

All for one (x)

giving:

ive said it once, i'll say it again. 

you just have no rights bro. im sorry. 

he wakes him sometimes and just goes, "this bitch deserves a rude awakening today". 

like okay mr fuckface. 

is the one that is always on x games mode, no softness for him at all.  

probably has you wear those kitten/mitten collar things like*cough cough* kakegurui *cough cough* even when youre carrying out errands for him. 

the point is honestly to keep you in place, and you cant help but like it anyways. 

some may dislike being viewed as a pet or anything less but you love it hence why you stay. 

plus, if you could runaway, would you be able to?

nevermind that, you didnt want someone else to replace you so youll stay his obedient bitch for now.. 😌

receiving:

you wouldnt. you just wouldnt.

[you-cant-spell-subtext-without]

Sigh. It’s quiet today, so I guess it’s about time to talk about 12x06: Celebrating the Life of Asa Fox.  

This is an episode without Cas, so clearly it revolves entirely around Cas (I'm kidding, but only a little bit).  It’s also a bottle episode and a meta writer’s wet dream, so excuse me while I nerd out - this is a long one to unpack, and I have spent too much time doing it for you.  That’s ok because, as Sam says:

DIVE IN AFTER THE CUT BUDDIES!

The Asa montage is where we start.

Asa is a Dean mirror. The parallels are pretty clear - he’s a scruffy rough around the edges hunter, Mary is the reason he got into hunting, he wears a ton of flannel, etc.  If you remain unsure, the writers throw this in at the very beginning in the montage of Asa’s life as a hunter So That You Know:

Bucky: Hey, you know they make new cars, right? Asa: I don’t want a new car. This is my lucky car. 

***Canadian!Dean confirmed.

Shaine Jones may also be the Canadian Jensen Ackles.

I don’t make the rules ok?

Back in the US, the boys surprise Jody with a visit. 

In case you forgot the episode prior to this one:

Side note: domestic Jody gives me life. 

We’re clearly supposed to see how Jody is a mom figure for the boys, and it feels nice for them to have that, especially since Mary is Taking Some Space.  Their entire dynamic warms even my cold black soul.

[romantic scene of a couple silhouetted against a sunset while sweeping music plays on Jody’s TV. The couple kisses.] 

DEAN

[his mouth full of pizza] Jody, you watching some kind of chick flick here?

JODY

Well, Dean. I’m a chick. 

Kim Rhodes YOU ARE A DELIGHT.  A side note - I know this exchange is supposed to be funny, but I feel sad for Dean (who clearly is a rom com chick).  This is a perfect example of Dean struggling to present some fabricated image of heteronormative masculinity that’s not the heart of who he actually is.  His surprise that a “badass sheriff chick” can also enjoy rom coms makes me fucking upset.  

ALSO:

Anyway, Asa has passed on and the boys tag along with Jody to the wake in support.  

SAM

Yeah, no, Jody. We… we know you’ll be fine, but… you know, we never go to hunter gatherings, outside of bars. Dad always said they were trouble, so…

DEAN

Yes, you’d be doing us a favor if you let us tag along.

***more receipts that John Winchester was an isolating abuser.  They could have at least had a normal HUNTER life and friends who hunted.

SAM  

That is a big house. [Music continues playing, coming from inside the house now]

***We now establish one “theme” of the episode.

JODY

Family home. Asa was just a guy. 

AKA pretty brutal implication that Asa didn’t have a family of his own.

Speaking of implications:

[Jody removes her coat and the three of them begin mingling. Dean finds his way to the kitchen and a cooler full of beer] DEAN

No label. Well, that’s a red flag. 

****LOL WHAT THE FUCK IS THE REASON****

....

....

....

GIRL SEND HELP

Enter Bucky, who is actually (SPOILER!) the villain of the episode.

Do all hunters just walk around with this manly flannel/weird symbolic necklace combo?  Looking at you Bucky and Dean.  

Dean is surprised to find that people know who he is:

But doesn’t seem to have an issue with it until -

***Someone who just bragged the entire five hour car ride about killing Hitler shouldn’t be this concerned about what people are saying about him right? 

Or is he thinking it may involve something he isn’t comfortable sharing - since apparently there are things Dean doesn’t feel comfortable sharing as established by the prior couch conversation with Jody?  Hmmmmmm...

***Compare the expressions.  The “you’ve died four times” response is the same as the smug/proud “I killed Hitler” face.  The reaction to the “stories” is the “hey this is my personal business” reaction Dean had to Sam’s Japanese erotica art form comment. He is thinking specifically about something personal.

I wonder what it could be.

I don’t think any one had to teach Max Banes the art of seduction, but also thank you.

Also, manifesting Dean being raised by Max and Alicia’s Cool Witch Mom instead of John Trash Winchester.  Because that’s what we’re supposed to think here, correct?  Two sibling hunters usually present a brother mirror.

Worth noting Sam’s surprise that witches can also be hunters.  The John Winchester Bigotry Brain Rot runs deep.  (GOD the Sam-witch thing would have driven him crazy I LIVE FOR THAT).

Dean escapes to Asa’s office/room and proceeds to go through his things.

[Dean is in Asa’s office and finds an angel blade mounted on blue velvet inside an ornate glass-lidded box. He opens it, reaches in and pulls out the angel blade, comfortably spinning it in his hand when Sam walks in.]

SAM

Hey.

DEAN

Oh, hi. This is a real Angel Blade. I mean, this guy was legit. 

***that’s weird, why does Canadian!Dean have an angel blade?  We haven’t heard anything about angels yet, and it wasn’t in the opening montage.  Hmmmmmm, I say. Hmmmmmmm...

***Sam is also concerned about The Stories They Tell 

This one particularly:

Honestly I don’t know why he’s THAT surprised that people know he was possessed by Lucifer?  Didn’t he start like multiple apocalypses?  That’s something people tend to be in the know about. Anyhoo.

DEAN

Yeah. Apparently we’re a little bit legendary. 

SAM 

Yeah, but, I mean, so was Asa. Then a hunt went bad, and he ended up hanging from a tree, alone in the woods.

DEAN

He died on the job. No better way to go. 

SAM

You really believe that? 

DEAN

Yeah. What, you don’t? I mean, come on, Sam, it's not like we're in the “live till you're 90, die in your sleep” business. This? [Dean points at Asa’s hunting wall] This only ends one way. 

***Insert deep internal screaming about 15x20 here***

It’s Jody’s turn to be uncomfortable as we find out she and Asa were more than just friends and everyone knew it and Said Things About It and Told Stories About It.

HMMMMMMM...

Dean is surprised that Jody not only enjoys rom coms, but ruggedly hot men. Another thing they have in common.

As Dean comes to terms with the idea that Jody can be a mother figure and also a human person with a life and her own feelings and needs and thoughts, enter the person whom said lesson is actually about:

This is a Kim Rhodes Facial Expression stan account now.

So cute how Jody knows immediately that Dean is not okay.  Time to reach:

JODY

Huh. Is that why you spent the entire ride up here telling me in extreme, excruciating detail how you killed Hitler, but, uh, you neglected to mention the fact that your mom is back from the dead? 

***look, it’s another Dean doesn’t like others knowing personal information parallel!***

DEAN 

Yeah, no big deal. 

JODY

That’s a lie.

DEAN

JODY …

JODY

Look, maybe this isn't my place, and this is epic stuff, but

JODY

Yeah. Because what if I’ve changed. What if they changed? What if it just didn’t work out the way I wanted?  If you wanna talk about anything

***Killing Hitler used yet again to show Dean doesn’t care about oversharing hunting stories, but he doesn’t like for people to know personal ones.  Also, Jody mentions her son and her husband.  Her family and her romantic partner.  

Dean wasn’t just reunited with Mary this season. He was also reunited with Cas, after saying goodbye to him at the end of Season 11 when he headed to what he thought was going to be his death as the Amara-bomb.

So, this conversation isn't just about Mary (the “anything”).  It’s also about Cas (the”...absolutely anything”).

Mary chats with Mama Fox and more Points Are Made about hunters not getting to have a “normal life” or family:

MARY

I saved his life. 

LORRAINE

[scoffing] What am I supposed to say to that? After you, Asa got so… Hunting was his whole life. He never married. Never had a family, kids. And now… enjoy the wake. 

***sending Mary on a guilt spiral about Asa (mirroring her other guilt spiral about hunting as a life for her own sons)

Speaking of mirrors:

BUCKY

And Asa loved that Jeep. Fuses were shorted, fuel line was busted. Ah, he didn’t care. He’d just roll up his sleeves, he’d get right to work. 

Time to learn about today’s Big Bad.

BUCKY

Jael. He’s a crossroads demon. And he hangs people. It’s his thing. Snaps their neck, slits their throat. He’s a real piece of work. 

***Wait a second.  Jael is a demon?  Don’t...angel’s names usually end in “el” in SPNverse?

Samandriel.

Uriel.

Gabriel.

Raphael.

Gadreel.

Castiel.

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.

Anyways the demon [questionable] killed Asa and now everyone  is trapped and also In Grave Danger.  

BUCKY

Exactly. Right, so five years later, Jael– he came back, and he came for Asa. 

JODY

How so? 

BUCKY

Asa was seeing this woman, right? She had a kid. 

LORRAINE

Marlene. 

BUCKY

Yeah, Marlene. Jael got into her. It didn’t matter that he was killing people, he wanted Asa to know it was personal. He gets off on it. 

***that’s so weird, didn’t someone else in the show start seeing a woman with a kid - 

what a sexy little coincidence.

oh and didnt  a supernatural being come back right around that time too - 

HMMMMMMMM.  No killing though.  That’s the difference between angels and demons, I guess.

(meanwhile Dean has been drinking alone outside - as he does, and is realizing he can’t get back in)

HI QUEEN

Also, this immediately took me to 

this show isn’t fair.

****sob break****

Jael Posession 1:

So curious how there are two siblings and then one gets possessed by something Satanic and the other one is good at seducing men.

SO FUCKING CURIOUS.

Jael Possession 2:

Elvis. Random.  Though he was the guy who brought up the Stories Sam Was Surprised Were Circulating -

He was also oddly interested in it.  Methinks Elvis thoroughly enjoyed the Jael possession.

Bilie gets Dean back in the house.  The words “one-time deal” are said a lot of times.

BONUS: Jensen why are you so pretty:

The hunters get to work, and I live for Max Bane’s pentagram aesthetic.

MAX

I like a Fifth Pentacle of Mars. It’s got more character. 

***TBH, same.

Jael possession 3:

****Kim Rhodes is even better when she is playing evil.

JODY/JAEL:

I had so hoped you’d kill your mom. Wouldn’t that be a riot? 

[Mary draws the angel blade and charges at Jody. She cuts Jody’s arm before Sam wrestles her away.] 

SAM

No! Mom!

MARY

What are you doing?! She’s a demon. We kill demons. 

******WOOF MARY - I REPEAT TO YOU THAT THE JOHN TRASH WINCHESTER BRAIN ROT RUNS DEEP.

Also did you immediately flash back to this with me?

Gets me thinking that Dean’s feelings for Cas are made twice as complicated by the fact that he is also a supernatural creature.  Another Reason Why John Winchester Would Disapprove.

****Just as he would Disapprove of Sam Being Possessed By the Devil and all that (never forget he told Dean to kill him because of the whole made unclean by demon blood thing). 

Right on cue:

JODY/JAEL

Oh, I have heard so many stories about you Winchesters. And I desperately want the Lucifer thing to be true.  

***Stories again. Jael proceeds to go into Stories That Are Dark Personal Shameful Secrets:

JAEL

As for the rest of you, I have been inside your heads. I know all about you. For example, the twins. Too frightened to tell anyone that they actually came to say goodbye to their daddy. Or the grieving mother who hated the fact that her son was a hunter so much she’d hide his gear, she’d sabotage his Jeep, anything to keep him from hunting. Not that it worked. Could’ve tried harder, huh? 

[She gestures at her own face] And this meatsuit you all seem to care so much about. She actually fantasized about a life with Asa. Can you believe that? Like that worthless man– 

***HMMMMMMMMM

[Bucky gets off the floor and sneaks up behind Jody/Jael] 

BUCKY 

Shut your filthy mouth. 

[Jody/Jael grabs Bucky by the neck and forces him to his knees] 

JODY/JAEL

And you. Bucky. Brave, brave Bucky. I was there that night. Tell these nice, stupid people what you did. Tell them what you took from me. Asa was mine. 

***Excuse me? THIS IS GETTING VERY...subtextual.  A dark timeline supernatural being/hunter relationship [ending badly because demons only know how to take, consume and possess]? ...Asael?  CURIOUS. 

They chant the exorcism, a different hunter doing each iteration (beautifully done) 

and send Jael back to hell, but not before Bucky shares his Shameful Story - he’s the one who killed Asa.

Elaboration:

BUCKY

Asa, he was just all– he was just always so stubborn. Look, we were in the woods. [We see the scene play out as Bucky describes it] Jael, he… he was taunting him. Asa wanted to chase him, but he didn’t have the angel blade. I said, “Let’s go back.” He called me a coward, and he shoved me, so I shoved him back, and he fell. He hit his head. Asa? I didn’t mean to do it. But it was a mistake. Asa. Asa? An accident. I’m sorry. I didn’t know what to do. Asa hated that damn demon so much that I just…

DEAN

Oh, you thought people would buy that Jael killed him? So you hung your best friend to cover your own ass. 

BUCKY

What are you gonna do to me? 

ALICIA:

Tell everyone, every hunter we meet. They’re gonna know your name, Bucky. Know what you did. 

MAX

You like stories. This is the story everyone’s gonna tell about you. Forever. 

***Shameful Stories that Define You, what a theme.  Also, definitely a supernatural being potentially having some subtextual feelings for Canadian!Dean.  Hmmm.

***Funeral pyre and side discussion about how Asa did have a family, and children, and a potential supernatural sidepiece.

In conclusion, Supernatural is a love story.  Thank you for watching this dark timeline/Canadian dub.  You’re dismissed for the day.  Go eat bacon.

[littlespaceporgs]

The Clone Wars Reacts - Part 1

Or, Leah thinks Yoda is a badass and thirsts and coos over Plo Koon.

Welcome to part 1 of season 1! Ngl I’ve only got 2 episodes for the first one because i didn’t have time to watch a third, so here we go. These are just the thoughts and notes i took as i made my way through the episode, in their absolute rawness, I’ve barely even edited them so enjoy? and before anyone mentions it, yes I could do these on tiktok and you guys could watch me being an idiot, would anyone be interested in that however?

Tags (if anyone else would like to be tagged in this series, let me know!): @acciokenobi​ @roseofalderaan​ @catsnkooks​ @peacelandbread​ @littlevodika​ @icedcoffeeandgays​ @captainrexstan​ @likeshootingstarsinthenightsky​ @mcu-padawan​

Episode 1: Ambush

> Fuck yeeeeeaaahhh this intro is a fucking bop, I forgot how much I like it

> OH WAIT HANG ON YODAS IN THIS EPISODE, like it’s actually Yoda centric???? mad.. i thought it was going to be anakin and ahsoka this ep

> FUCK I KNOW THAT VOICE *enter ventress*             - this woman could step on me and I’d say thank you ✨

> Oh shut tf up Dooku, nobody cares what you have to say

> “Sprung the trap, we have” no shit, is it just Yoda’s trademark to say exactly what’s going on?

> HAHAHAHAHHAAH “ITS MY PROGRAMMING”!!!!!

> I have some questions, who has the creativity to come up with characters and planets that look like this?? Like that’s so cool????

> Huh you actually think you’re gonna catch Yoda???? Interesting thought.

> HAHAHAHAHA SMALL SHRIVELLED GREEN ONE WITH A LIGHTSABER *accurate tho, and I live for Ventress’ sarcasm ngl

> I want to point out the peak humour of one droid saying stop, we’re not gonna fit, followed by a droid attempting to fit                  >> actually scratch that the droids are hilarious in general

> HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH HIS GIGGLE AND THEN DO YOU GUYS KNOW WHAT HE MEANT?!

> why is yoda likeable in this episode??? If you can’t tell already, I don’t like Yoda very much.

> “He IS a little one!”

> alright fine. i admit it, I don’t think I’ve given Yoda enough credit, I didn’t like him much, but 10 minutes episode and I’m lowkey giggling at him.

> Dude Yoda is so cool *(Notes: i have written in a column here: should rename the title of part i to “Yoda is a fucking boss”)

> The force is so cool ngl

> “Trouble? Know nothing of this trouble, I do” hahahahaha hahahahaha

> AW HUNNY NO YOURE NOT EXPENDABLE YOU NEED TO GO WITH THE SHRIVELLED GREEN LITTLE SHIT

> good job Yoda make em feel better for me thank you

> *droid battallion approaches and Yoda just fucking sits there* Have I mentioned that Yoda is literally so cool?

> Bruh I shouldn’t be surprised that the 4 of them destroyed an entire battalion but that was legit AWESOME

> HA HA HA HA AH BITCH YODA GONNA KICK UR ASS

> Eh i don’t think I’ve said this enough, Yoda’s fucking cool.

> PFFFFFFFFFFTTTT fully just stole her lightsabers - imagine how much trouble Yoda would’ve saved himself if he had just kept the bastards instead of letting her take them back

> Alright fine, maybe I will enjoy this season.

 Episode 2: Rising Malevolence 

Notes: I am so sorry in advance, to be honest this entire one is just me either thirsting or cooing over Plo Koon and I can’t help it, and no, I still have not decided dad or daddy (its currently 14(?) hours after I watched the episode and I am still very undecided and I don’t think I’m ever gonna be able to make that choice)

> HEY ITS LITTLE BABEY AHSOKA AND OMG HOLY SHIT HES IN THIS EPISODE????????????????

> Lowkey I dunno if it’s dad or daddy?

> Awwwwwww Lil soka (wait I’m talking about Plo Koon in case you’re confused) (NOTES: uh I know I put it up top but just case you missed it)

> Sorry, did Anakin just say he was gonna ask the council?? The fuck?? 

              >>Be mindful????? Who the fuck is this????

> Ugh it’s palptatunes slimy looking ass

> OBI OBI OBI OBI OBI OBI OBI

> oh shit man that’s bad *if you haven’t clued in I’m going on about the weapon

> AWWWWWW HE WAITS FOR THE CLONES TO GET ON FIRST

> dude what the fuck is going on with his hair??

> Everytime Plo talks my mind goes 🥰 sorry that’s off topic (or is it?)

> At least obi-wan sees sense, Anakin teaching an already reckless Ahsoka was never going to end up with them both being quiet

> AHSOKA! 😠

> Oh wait Wolffe doesn’t have his scar yet????? WAIT DOES THAT MEAN WE SEE HIM GET IT LATER?! Oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh-

> HAHAHAHAHA HE ONLY TAKES A BATH ON BREAK

> HMMMMMM AWWWWW I VALUE YOUR LIFE MORE THAN FINDING THAT WEAPON

> There’s more alive, oh good I was afraid that they- aw shit poor Plo he sounds like he feels so guilty

> fucking hell I just wanna give him a hug and kiss his cheek and make it all better (NOTES: see what I mean???? Thirst or fluff?)

> OOP THERE IT IS! I was wondering when the usual Anakin would show up

> “Redeployed himself.... again.” I can feel obi-wans exasperation with this kid man

> Okay so, Anakin is a little shit. So disobey the council but don’t tell them that I’m teaching you that

> Aw no there’s gonna be more clones die??????? Oh no and they have to watch oh no oh no oh no-

> I have questions: How are they screaming? I don’t think that’s how space works??? Ok but I legit don’t know?? Is it even possible to scream in space?? And shouldn’t it have killed them straight away?

> Aaawwwwww Ahsoka my baby (literally anytime this child comes on screen)

> “Anakin where are you” I love obi wan so much hahahahahahahahaha

> WAIT NO PLO AND FEW OF HIS SONS TROOPERS ARE ALIVE DONT LEAVE

> oh good job R2, crisis averted

> Pfffftttt the droid humming is distracting me from the more potential death

> Plo Koon is cooler than Yoda, you cant change my mind so don’t try.

> YEEEEETTTTTT poor sinker yikes I can’t imagine flying through space is fun

> PALPATINE YOU BASTARD HE PROBABLY WANTS MY LOVE DEAD HOW DARE HE

> “Twice the trouble they have become”?????? No shit Yoda. What were you thinking pairing these two disasters up?

> AND THEN HE TRIES TO GET THEM TO ABANDON DAD(DY?)

> R2’s whirring is a vibe tho

> AAAAAAHHHH NOT TO ME PLO MY HEART 🥺🥺

> oh god the animation is terrible (NOTES: I can’t believe it took me that long to make that comment)

> Aw he seems so sad, thank u Ahsoka, she gave him the love and hug he deserves

> Ugh now my internet’s playing up dang it, well this is infuriating, I WANT TO KNOW IF THEY DESTROY THE WEAPON OR NOT?!

> He seems so genuinely scared??????? Plo has me getting major feels

> OH SHIT FUCK THE OTHER DROID SHIT FUCK NO SHIT

> how did everyone hate Ahsoka when this first came out??? I love her so much

> I mean like, I know they’re not gonna die??? But I still feel so anxious omg

> Holy shit the disappointment that rolls off of dooku is kinda hilarious (it took all of me not to start giggling at this)

> “Riiiiiiiiiiiiight the council report”

Alright gonna stop here, because I have class in 20 minutes and there is no way that I am leaving the library if I start watching episode 3 so uh see y’all next time for episodes 3,4,5 and maybe 6??

[skips-is-asleep]

Hi I’m back to Infodump about Solkat Fanfictions

This time, we’re covering my next favorite. I Fall Forward, You Fall Flat by roachpatrol

Ahhhhh okay I’m so excited. I’ve read this fic enough times to basically just pull it up in my brain and remember what happens like a movie where ever i go, im not even joking.

This is TOP TIER pitch solkat, rivaled only but their work they did with Layla in Imperial Pop star, but that’s for another post because ahhhohmygod.

I digress, this fic is so unbelievably good at writing their dynamic. The broken up story telling gets me tingly and excited, and the flashbacks so wonderfully compliment the modern story and what’s happening in the present.

Before I go on, i gotta mention that it is rated M for a partial sex scene in the last portion and a partial jerk off scene near the start. It also says the R-slur twice which really isn’t cute and is the only thing keeping this from absolute perfection.

That being said, I’ve never seen a fic that so beautifully and poetically illustrates kismesistude and all it’s glory. Spoiler alert, i really fucking like pitch romances a lot. I love how passionate it is, and how mean, downright spiteful it is. And this fic really GETS that, it really gets how beautiful this type of romance can really be in a way that i’ve never seen before. Poetry really hits it right on the head. The way Sollux’s inner monologue describes it makes it feel really on the same level of matespriteship that we don’t see in the fandom nearly enough. It’s like this deep indulgence to read it and just OH i need screenshots hold on

THis shit this shit this shit this SHIT. Get’s me GOING, how elegant, how beautiful, how mystical, OH.

This is another fic that does really really well to put you in the narrators shoes. I feel so hard how much Sollux pines for him. I feel the heavy, pendulum-like swinging of hopelessness, And I feel the excitement of the confrontation on the beach and hmmmmmm.....i dunno if i’ll spoil that for you, you should probably read it yourself.

But you feel the tingles of jealousy and awkwardness, each bump of tension between them as they interact in person versus the smooth fight-flirting in texts in the flashbacks.

You can feel it in this screenshot, you can feel the slip up, and sometimes, i even get secondhand embarrassment so much, i blush. This scene, and others like it, are THAT powerful.

Also, not just the scenes with Karkat and Sollux are good. This fic writes both of their respective moirails in this BEAUTIFULLY. I don’t even LIKE gamkat, but this makes it so appealing. The way they interact, with extremely little dialogue, is just so comforting.

And the Arasol in this is so nakedly obvious to be two moirails who probably don’t remember a time without one another. And this has one of the best Aradia’s written in it that I’ve ever seen, she has a personality besides “adventure” and “big smile.” She’s pushy, and needling, and meddling, and tough-loving! She knows what Sollux’s needs and tells him straight up, and that’s what’s great about her! And you get that in one simple chatlog flashback and the like...two mentions of her in casual thought from Sollux, it’s great, i love it. The simple love between them.

My favorite scenes are the Arasol chatlog, and the video flashback for uh. Artistic reasons, if you’ll believe me. It feels like this writer really goes poetic and smooth flowing when they get horny, yeah? 

I really really really love just how attracted to Karkat this fic makes Sollux out to be. Like Karkat is just insanely badass, strong and sexy and i find it fascinating and hilarious. I’ve never thought of Karkat as so “dangerous” before i read this. This is the first fic to make him seem a fucker you don’t wanna mess with, and I love it. All other interpretations of Karkat have been bumbling, incompetent and way out of Sollux’s league. Sollux has always been the unstoppable badass with no fucks to give and nothing to lose, high level psionic with a temper issue and a death wish, why would anyone challenge him?

But in this, Sollux is so spadestruck he doesn’t know what to do with himself. And i’m not just saying that

He views himself as being so unworthy of karkat’s hate, it’s so him, and so intact with his Sollux Melodrama. Just to give a few examples of how devastatingly horny Sollux is in this fic...

Like!! What! I love it, I love it SO MUUUCH. Sollux has never been characterized better in my opinion, I’ve never seen him just so distraught over how hot he thinks Karkat is.

Im sorry, this is more screenshots than usual, I just cannot gush enough about this fic.

Also like.....the world building in this? The weird and beautiful pieces of yum yum details that this fic adds so casually? I can’t even describe how many things I just do not understand in this fic, so many little things I just cannot comprehend because it’s an alien world with alien rules that I am not apart of. Also some of the descriptions just...do not get through in my head, i don’t understand.

like i just straight up do not know what this means. It’s so *chefs kiss* in it’s way of drip dropping little nuggets of info and then just leaving them on the floor with barely a context clue to help. That above screenshot is BARELY taken out of context.

Anyway, I think that’s all the info i have to dump, but if I get anymore details  I wanna thoroughly gush about, I’ll let ya’ll know.

If this sounds like your cup of tea, please please PLEASE read this fic, it’s so fucking good.

Im gonna go reread this in it's entirety now

[sea-dragon-pride]

A very neatly folded note rests on top of the blankets in your hammock, reading: "I thought you would enjoy a rainbow, assuming you've the time for all of these. Brick, Rust, Butterscotch, Laurel, (Navy??? JK) Aegean, Violet, Rouge, Bone, Gingerbread, Shadow, Ink"

A couple pages of scribbles are left under Av’s pillow (they’re a little crinkled) - *gasp*! OH WOW, what a sweet surprise!!! You know me so well, I can never decide on a favorite color!! Thank you as always to my adoring fans who may or may not happen to also be my roommate! I love you, mwah!! [Let it be known that the “mwah” is in fact written down on the paper, Tiller really wanted to get across blowing a kiss to her “audience”.] 

Brick - What are some things you dislike?

OH HMMMMMM okay…. OKAY YEAH, for one, I really don’t like bossy people. Like who do you think you are??? Telling me what to do? It’s different if we’re tight and it’s like a suggestion or we can talk about it or something, but folks who just shout orders around? Ew. Super not cute. I also don’t like storms. They rock the ship and make it hard to sleep and then water gets down in the hull and *I* have to bucket it out. It’s really inconvenient for ME but whatever. Last one, I dislike people who don’t tip.

Rust - Have you thought about becoming old? Can you become old? Are you scared of being old? What do you think about elders?

Um, DUH I get older, I’m not Kidd ya silly BITCH! I guess I haven’t thought much about it though... I still have a lot of time left (I hope hahaha) and my life so far has been going at a pretty fast pace, so I haven’t stopped to really think about the future? I like to live in the present and things have been working pretty okay that way!! I’m not that scared of being old, it would mean that I’d have lots of stories to tell and adventures that I’ve experienced. And I could pull pranks on people and no one could get mad at me because old people can do whatever they want! As for what I think about “elders”, I just think it depends on the person, like everything. Cause I’ve met some pretty stuffy old clams who were Super annoying and I don’t wanna hang with them, but then you have people like… well, All My Dads, who love me and give good advice and tell bad jokes! They’re a fun time if you can find the right ones!

Butterscotch - Is there candy in the world you live in? If so, do you have a favorite one? 

100% cotton candy!! I don’t know if it counts??? But it’s got “candy” in the name, so it has to! It’s just so fluffy and the way it melts in your mouth is wonderful and I would always get it as a kid on the Nassau boardwalks!

Laurel - Is there a major victory you’ve achieved in your life? if so, what is it?

I… don’t think so, actually. Sure, I’ve lived a life on sea for a good 8 years now but… I didn’t do it alone. I’ve seen many a great feat done by other people, and been on some really wild missions with you guys of course, but we got through it by working together and half the time we almost died haha! I suppose surviving to live another day is a victory in itself, but I’m guessing that’s not what you mean. It’s kind of embarrassing, but I feel like I’m not super useful on my own.

Navy - have you ever been on a boat/sailing? does it exist in your world? did you enjoy it? 

Avelinnnnnneeeeee!!!!! You crack me up! 

Aegean - Would you consider yourself a wise person? who do you look to for wisdom?

Not really??? I just pay attention to shit that’s like super obvious. And people will say “whoa how did you notice that?” and I’ll be like “UM I’m awake? What are you doing??” Regardless, I get a lot of wisdom and life TIPS from you guys! My adoring fans!!! (AKA, my Triumph pals, the several Captains I’ve known over the years, my dads, the fish that talk to me during the night shift, they got them deep philosophies.)

Violet - What is your ideal date?

Ohhhh I dunnnoooo hehehehehe!!!! I’m feel like I’m a simple gal, choose something FUN and I’ll like it! Like learning to cook together or having a beach day or going to a carnival or seeing fireworks or setting things ON fire together WITH the fireworks! Ya know, keep it SPICY, keep it FRESH! (Gifts Definitely don’t hurt either >:3c I know the most important thing is the romance and the vibes and the person you’re with, but COME ON, who doesn’t like getting a new bracelet or an imported set of map pens??) But seriously, any date is fun if you’re with the right person! Haha, if it’s meant to be, you could be trying to kill one another, and it’d still be fun and flirty haha ha ha h a,,, know what I mean??

Rouge- Do you have an unpopular opinion?

No, I’m very popular, everyone agrees with me :)

Bone - When was the first time you ever witnessed death? How did it impact you?

Yikes, a dark one, uh okayyy…. The first time I saw someone die was when I was briefly captured by Captain Elliot, so you could say a LOT of shitty things were happening that day. We were on course to Charlestown so they could execute us, but Elliot wanted to make an example of those who “disobeyed” him. He picked a man from the brig, I didn’t recognize his pirate sigil. He then called all the prisoners to watch as he tied the man by his hands and ankles and hoisted him over the railing of the ship… I didn’t know what keelhauling was at the time, but now I know it’s an old sailor tactic, real gruesome shit. Anyway, Elliot had a bag put over this prisoner’s head and dropped him overboard in the water. He used the rope on the other end of the ship to drag him underneath the hull, keeping him underwater till I was sure he wouldn’t make it. The prisoner did eventually get pulled up the other side- his clothes were shredded, and his skin covered in deep lacerations where the splinters and barnacles had cut him up. He was bleeding like a gutted fish, the bag over his head half torn off. The man was barely recognizable. He was coughing hard, and after waiting a few minutes to catch his breath… Elliot quietly strung him up again, and pulled him through a second time. He didn’t come up breathing the next time around.

Gingerbread - What is your favorite holiday?

Changing the tone from the last question entirely, PIRATE CHRISTMAS! Everyone can’t help but be a little more joyful, and you get to PRANK people by surprising them with stuff they like!!! They never see it coming!!! And then there’s the god awful combination of sea shanties and christmas carols and it’s such a mess that you can’t help but be endeared by it. And the ship looks really pretty with all the decorations minus the cold elements! I haven’t been anywhere where it snows yet, but I’m sure that would make the deck really slippery anyway so who needs it!

Shadow - What is your biggest regret?

…. There’s a lot of things I didn’t say to Mayday before I left the Sun Skulls ship in the dead of night. I regret that I wasn’t honest with her… about several things. I also regret that I left in the dead of night… it’s not an easy thing to come back from, and at this point I don’t think she’ll ever come around.

Ink - write your autobiography in one sentence

Tiller Jakobie, called by the sea and happy to answer.

[phoenixknightv2]

New State of the REALUnion plus Drama Vs Trauma The Blog Version

One thing i will say is i’ am so glad that the one thing that has been more true to me than anything or anybody officially returns in 24 hours. I have missed it so much and it has been so long since i needed it back at this level. The first half of this year was amazing. The second half outside of meeting my girlfriend has been a fucking Disaster in so many ways. Felt like the darkest time of my life all over again. Basketball Season especially when it comes to Texas Hoops is like what Kills to Dexter Morgan are. So anybody doesn’t freak out, if you haven’t seen the show Dexter then A) It’s a great show up until the final season but also B)Since he is more of a vigilante, Well......You’ll just have to watch the show to get it. Basketball season keeps me Sane. Not just another team to me, they are a part of me. When they win, i win. When they lose, i lose. Either way, i would be a jackass if i didn’t start off with that. HAPPY BASKETBALL SEASON MOTHERBLEEPERS!!!! I DON’T CARE WHAT ANYBODY SAYS THAT IS THE BEST TIME OF YEAR!!!!!! EVEN BETTER THAN ANY OF THE HOLIDAYS!!!!!!

The fact that people in this society put mental health way below the level of importance is just really heartbreaking. I haven’t seen it yet but The Joker movie (which I heard is surprisingly really good) states just that. Before I begin I just want to say a very special shoutout to my mom and my girlfriend who finally get why I do what I do. With my movement and my show. I wanna make one thing clear, I forgave my mom a very long time ago. I just still bring it up on my show and then some because a lot of you out there still don’t get why I do what I do. Why i’am doing all of this!!!! And although like my aunt says I can’t change everything in this broken society, as long as I make even just a little bit of difference then I know I did the best I could.

It’s been awhile my firebirds and realbies. Let’s begin.

Originally posted by allreactions

I’m gonna begin this edition of the real Time blog by saying I’am done. This summer multiple times I’ve had to explain myself multiple times and i’am done. I don’t have to explain myself to all the doubters out there anymore. If you still don’t understand then fine but if you choose not to understand because your ignorance is so far up your ass then those are the ones I’m not explaining myself too. Far as I’m concerned, if you still want to doubt me then as far as I’m concerned you can kiss my ass. The only person I will compromise with regarding my movement somewhat (also because she is right on some things) is of course my girlfriend. Somewhat but just a teeny tiny bit my father only because I live with him still for now (hoping that won’t be the case for much longer) but I do got some things I need to figure out. Tell you one thing, it won’t be here. As a matter of fact, within the next year or year and a half, I don’t want to be in Austin anymore. This city more and more is getting fucked because of shitty leadership and all they care about is Money!!! OH LIKE YOU DUMBASSES DON’T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY!!!!! OH PUHLEASE!!! Fuck off on out of here. Because of that kind of ignorance and greed, this city is falling apart. It’s going to continue to fall apart and same with this society. Yes I get we all have to make money and yes I get it’s a capitalist society but it has gotten too far into greed and corruption. It is fucking up this society and Austin, Texas is an example of that. These news sites and rankings can rank it all it wants but do they not realize that there is a dark side to this city and what they are doing is contributing to said dark side of this city? Apparently not. Who knows maybe they’re getting bought off. But what I do know is I don’t want to be here anymore. It’s not the same city and other than my father and girlfriend, I have nothing here anymore. I mean yes I have the one thing that has been true to me (alas Texas hoops) but it’s not just another team to me. It’s apart of me. However I can’t be held back forever. I gotta do what’s best for me. For my future. Within the next year I want to be in San Marcos for the short term end game and then the long term End game, I wanna be in Miami. More of the Boca/Deerfield beach area. Man wouldn’t it be fun to be in a beach community. It so would.

Lets do the blog edition of Drama vs Trauma. I already did it in the show now it’s time to read it.

-Did I asked to be raped by Some of the neighborhood kids when I was a kid? No. Tell me I’m full of Drama

-Did I asked to be very badly mentally abused by my mom and ex stepmom? Definitely my ex stepmom more? No. Tell me I’m full of drama

-Did I ask for a certain bitch who I was kind of seeing before I started seeing my way better more amazing way hotter more kind hearted girlfriend, do what she did with the whole (country accent) I won’t abandon you one minute but then the next minute she abandoned me? Nah playa tell me I’m full of drama. (yes I’m taking shots at said someone but again I should thank her because her immature actions led me to my amazing girlfriend)

-Did I ask for two of my FORMER best friends at my FORMER job to fuck me over the way they did for about a year? After everything I’ve done for them assholes. Putting everything I got for them, that place, having their back, etc yet it still wasn’t good enough? No, tell me i’m full of drama. I dare you

-DID I ASK FOR A NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE SEVERAL YEARS AGO?!?!?!??!?! NO I DIDN’T. TELL ME I’M FULL OF DRAMA!!!!!!!!

-Did i ask for my mom back then to have an affair behind my stepdad’s back with a man who i was pretty much forced to move out with her to his house when i hardly knew him and pretty much forced to look at him like a father figure? NAH FUCK NO I DIDN’T!!!!! TELL ME I’M FULL OF DRAMA I FUCKING DARE YOU!!!!!!!!!

-DID I ASK FOR MANY PEOPLE THROUGHOUT MY LIFE TO FUCKING GIVE ME THEIR WORD AND SHIT ON IT YET I’M THE ONE WHO’S GIVING ALL THE EFFORT?!?!?!?!? NO I DIDN’T!!!!!! AS A MATTER OF FACT, ONE THING I CAN’T STAND IS PEOPLE WHO FUCKING THINK I’M STUPID WHEN I’M ALOT SMARTER THAN YOU THINK!!!!! (Translation: I cannot stand ghosting and as a matter of fact, there’s alot of that going on lately.)

I got something i want to say to that but i’ll say it later on. Basically goes to one of my major points. Back to Drama vs Trauma!!!!!

-Did i ask for a mental condition like Asbergers, Anxiety and depression that have fucked with me my entire life? That made me unfortunately have to take special ed classes in high school? That made me look like a freak to where i was being treated differently and then some? No i didn’t. Tell me i’m full of Drama

-Anything else in my book or my show that alot of you have yet to learn about me, but yet decide to still question me and who i’am, I DARE YOU TO TELL ME TO MY FACE I’M FULL OF DRAMA!!!!!

Finally to end this portion of the REALUnion because there is alot more i got to say,

- DID I ASK FOR ONE OF MY OWN?!?!?!?!? ONE OF MY OWN WHO WAS A GOOD MAN AND LOVED BY SO MANY YET HE WAS SUFFERING TO FUCKING SAY HE COULDN’T DO THIS ANYMORE SO HE DECIDED TO TAKE HIS OWN LIFE?!?!?!?!?! NO, AND ANYBODY GOING FORWARD WHO HAS A PROBLEM WITH WHY I DO WHAT I DO CAN KISS MY ASS

Now before i continue, i know for a fact that i’m not easy and yes, i’ am a little too much at times. I get that i’ am overwhelming at times. However you know what, despite my imperfections i know that i’ am alot better and there are alot of good about me and that i have done alot for alot of people. Some of you see it, the rest unfortunately do not. It’s fine, i’m used to it. But if you think i’m just going to just sit by and take ALL THE BLAME......You clearly don’t know who i’ am.

For so long, i have had people tell me one thing one minute and then a complete different the very next. I can’t even begin to tell you how many times that has fucked with my head. It has happened throughout my entire life. I wonder how anxiety and depression could’ve developed? Hmmmmmm (I say that with major sarcasm)?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!

Also i may have said it already but in case i haven’t. I’ am going back to therapy because with all the events that have been happening lately, i have once again reached the point of wondering if i can do any of this anymore. Let me make one thing clear. A lot of the work is on me, the inner to make myself better. I get that. However like i have said with my anti anxiety medication (I can only take it so much and it can only do so much) the rest needs to do its part. Going back to the first part? I can only do so much work on myself but in any situations, relationships, it takes both sides and after what’s been happening.... i’am done doing all the damn work. Outside of my father,

These are the only ones who i know that will do their part and won’t make me feel like I HAVE TO DO THE DAMN WORK 100 PERCENT

AKA (The i trust you list)

Because i may love you but trust is a much different thing

-My Amazing Girlfriend Nicole (Number 1)

- Andria my amazing long time Best friend and the Big sister i’ve never had

-Glenn

-Michelle

-My Big 12 Country Brothers

-My Longhorn Nation Brothers

-Evan

-My Uncle Dave

-My Aunt Carla (Even if we don’t agree on everything)

-My Grandpa Lou

-My mom

-Will

-Devonna

-Daniel

-Chris(tian)

-Mary

-my Stepdad Jesse

-Jaclyn (My life coach)

-Jon

-Jon’s family

If you have made the list so far, congratulations and thank you for being the people who have been consistently trustworthy. Who have accepted me for who i’ am even when i haven’t been easy.

Now if you haven’t made the list, one of three things.

A) I May love you but i don’t trust you. I’ve had to do all the work and no effort in return. When you need something, i’m there always unconditionally but when i need something, WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?!?!??!?!

B) Because my trust has been violated so many times by so many, if you aren’t consistent then you are under evaluation but you got a chance to earn yourself back into my good graces. I’m done putting everybody at a level 10 when level 10 needs to be me and then 9 needs to be those i trust the most.

C) Don’t talk as much but nothing personal

I made a promise that i was never going to go back to rock bottom again. I made a promise to someone who i gave a tremendous shit about that i would never let anybody who was a good person suffer ever again. Now once again if anybody ever wants to question me, then go right ahead but have the balls to say it to my face. Don’t beat around the bush.

Let me say something that alot of people are probably wondering. ‘’Sky you have a girlfriend? Why are you still acting like the way you are acting?”

Well i’ll respond to it with this, just because my amazing girlfriend is in my life now, doesn’t mean that everything is fixed!!! No my fight and my movement still is going strong and it will continue to get strong. My amazing girlfriend is just my amazing support system. Is there boundaries we have to follow? Especially me? Of course and we both are a constant work in progress. It hasn’t been easy and she’ll even tell you. But you know what, after she read my book even if we won’t agree always on everything, she gets it and she is someone i can confide in. Obviously i don’t want to ALWAYS BE AS REAL AS IT GETS WHEN I’M WITH HER because i do want to enjoy my time with her and i want her to enjoy her time with me. However she gets it and then some. It hasn’t been perfect and hasn’t been easy but we just continue to get stronger and she continues to be an even more amazing girlfriend and amazing partner. It’s why she will always be my number 1. And while to everyone else yes i should sit back and enjoy it (which i do), it doesn’t mean that everything else is fixed. Doesn’t mean that i’m going to be a fake ass SumBitch. That is not how i roll

And once again, IF YOU LIVE BY THE GOOD VIBES ONLY SAYING AND YOU ARE IGNORING SOMEONE WHO IS SUFFERING THEN YOU ARE SO FULL OF SHIT AND YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM OF THIS GREEDY HEAD UP YOUR ASS SOCIETY!!!!! Tired of that saying. Ignorance

One more thing, and this is in regards to something i found out, I’m going to say this one more TIME!!!!! WE ALL HAVE OUR FIGHTS!!!! I GET IT!!!! I GET THAT CERTAIN THINGS ARE PART OF LIFE BUT I’M DOING WHAT I’M DOING AND WILL CONTINUE TO DO SO BECAUSE THERE COMES A POINT where ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!!!!! ALSO I’M JUST ME AND THE PEOPLE AROUND ME!!!! I get that sometimes caring about others before myself is not always the greatest thing but it’s who i’ am. When others suffer, i get upset or i get mad. My girlfriend is the same damn way which is why we are such a great match and indeed soulmates. But unless you know my story then sit down and shut your mouths!!!! Because just like how i don’t get alot of other people and things, alot of other people and things won’t get me. EVER!!!! But at least i care

As of today November 5th, 2019.....Opening night of the one thing that has been true to me more than anything and anybody. The following shit ends here...

-The ghosting fucking ends.

-People who give me their word and then shit on it.

-Me doing things for others and then when i need something, a good chunk is MIA!!!!!

-Everything similar to this summer, if it ever happens again, I WILL SHUT IT DOWN FASTER THAN A HOG TRYING TO GET AWAY FROM A HUNTER TRYING TO PUT A BULLET IN HIS ASSHOLE!!!!!

I will do whatever it takes to never hit rock bottom again but i will do it again. After all the shit that i’ve been surrounded by majority my entire life, NO MORE!!!!! Some of it is indeed out of my control. But the rest, i will get justice. I will continue to be who i’ am, i’ am not changing for anybody. I’ ll tone it down for certain situations (aka things that are important to my girlfriend) but otherwise No!!!! Because although i’ m not perfect and sometimes i’m not easy to be around, i need to remember the great things about myself. and there is alot. I’ am fair and respectful and kind until i have a reason to not be any of those things. I don’t like being the not so good side of me but if i have a reason to be that way and right now after everything again that has happened up until this point, If anybody has the right to be that way, it’s me because as i have said....Smiling and being happy go lucky isn’t always the answer. After what happened with that stupid bitch who i was somewhat seeing before i met my amazing girlfriend (who got together with me right after the last State of the REALUnion which i wrote right after the stupid bitch who i was seeing before i became a couple with my amazing way better girlfriend, what are the odds that me being REAL won me my amazing girlfriend over. Guess i did something right. It’s just hard to do so in this greedy stupid fucked up society these days), just proves my point even more.

Finally in closing, if anybody is wondering and some probably will, why you aren’t on this list? If it’s because i’m not happy with alot of things still and i will put everything else under evaluation until it is revealed whether i can trust you or not? Then you’re damn right because i will not put up with much more for much longer. Things are going to change or i’ m done. I get that life and shit gets in the way, that’s fine. That’s not the issue but it’s the effort and giving me your word and then shitting on it. Everything i’ve said to this final point is basically what i’m saying.

I will rise back up to the top, i will rise from the dead, or i will die trying.

Mr. Real as it gets is back. THE PHOENIX KNIGHT IS BACK!!!

REMEMBER MY FIREBIRDS

I WILL ALWAYS LIGHT THE WAY

ALL YOU HAVE TO DO

IS

LET

ME

IN

THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE

PHOENIX KNIGHT FOREVER

ON TO HOOPS SEASON

TILL NEXT TIME MY REALBIES AND FIREBIRDS

-S-