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multifandomgirl08 · 7 months

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Give Me Eyes To See [Mini Verstappen Series]

Dad!Max Verstappen x Mother!Reader (Established Relationship)

Summary: Nikita's first few days at home. Flashbacks to moments from the reader's pregnancy.

Warning(s): Flashbacks, Mentions of giving birth (Non-graphic)

A/N: All of the Flashbacks are individual things that were written that I condensed into this. The last flashback could have been its own part but I thought it fit better here. Title taken from the song Home by Corey Taylor.

Words: 2.7k

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Max had grown to love the backyard. It was a big reason as to why they had chosen this house when he and Y/N had talked about moving.

It was quiet and peaceful here. It made time slow down and made him appreciate the little things in life. Like the little bundle of blankets that he was holding in his arms.

Max had never thought that he would be a father before he retired from racing. It was never in the cards for him. Nico had been a surprise in his life and Nikita had also been unexpected. The first time that Max had held Nico he thought he was small. Nikita was even tinier for just a few days old.

He was eating every three hours and wasn’t letting Y/N get any sleep. Max rocked Nikita as he slightly whimpered in the bundle. He was enamored with him.

Something so small that he helped create that had been in Y/N’s belly was now in his arms.

“I… I know that you are new to the world.” He muttered as Nikita dozed in his arms. “I just want you to know that as your Papa, I’ll do everything that I can to be there for you. I may not be there every day like your Mama, but I love you just as much.”

He laid his hand over Nikita’s chest, feeling the faint rise and fall of his little breaths under his hand.

As Max held Nikita, he couldn’t help but think back to the first time that he got to hold Nico. From the moment that both of his sons had come into his life, he knew he was going to do everything that he could, to do right by them.

August 7th, 2025

“What do you think about Nikita for a name?” You asked Max.

Max had just spent the last few hours trying to figure out the directions to put together the furniture that would be going in the baby’s room. After spending a few hours figuring out how the directions worked, he was now sitting on the couch in the family room with you looking through a book filled with baby names.

Max’s first thought was of Nikita Mazapin. He didn’t want a child of his, named after him.

“No.” He simply said.

“It means victory in Russian.” You offered while stroking your growing bump.

Now Max was even more against the idea. In the last few weeks, you had this idea of the baby having an Ni name like with Nico and you hadn’t let the idea go.

Max had put his gaming controller to the side pausing the current Fifa game that was on the screen.

“What about if it’s a girl?” He asked. He liked the possibility of there finally being a girl in the family. Victoria had two boys and he had Nico. Maybe it would be nice to have a little girl walking around that looked like you.

“Well, we’ll see when the baby finally comes.” You had both agreed that you wanted the gender of the baby to be a secret.

“But if it’s a boy, I know that I want him to have the middle name Daniel.”

Max couldn’t help but smile and shake his head. “Daniel?” He questioned. “My son, named after two F1 drivers. Nikita Mazapin and Daniel,” Max was okay with the baby’s middle name being taken from Daniel, Daniel was a good friend to him, a good uncle to Nico and he had been a great teammate.

You couldn’t help but look at him slightly confused. “Nikita Mazapin? I was thinking Nikita for Niki, like Niki Lauda.”

“Then why not Nikolaas, it’ll still be shortened to Niki.”

“This baby doesn’t really feel like a Nikolaas.”

“How about we make a deal? The baby is a boy, I’ll let you pick the name, anything you want. But it’s a girl I get to pick.”

Even as you agreed with Max, he knew in the end that you would get your way. He could never deny you anything. His second child, if it was a boy, was going to be named after Niki Lauda.

Max had come inside from sitting out on the terrace that led to the backyard. Nikita had been fussing a bit, probably due to the slight cold breeze this morning.

"Papa." Max heard from the hallway.

He looked up to see Nico standing outside of the door to the master bedroom. Nico was still in his pajamas holding the stuffed teddy bear that Charles had gotten him.

Max looked at Nico before moving his head to glance back at the bed where Y/N was still sleeping. He motioned for Nico to walk closer to him.

Since that moment that Nikita had come home with them, Nico had been curious about his little brother. How small he was. What type of food he was allowed to eat. When he could start to play with him.

Nico climbed onto the couch and scooted as close as he could to Max.

"Can I?" Nico asked, putting out his little hands.

Max nodded, placing the baby closer to Nico without putting him in his arms. Nico reached down to give Nikita a kiss on his forehead before the baby shifted in his swaddle.

Over the last few days, Max had noticed that Nikita wasn't a fussy baby. He only started crying when he was hungry or when he needed to be changed, besides that he just liked to sleep.

"He's small," Nico commented.

"Yes, he is. You were once that small too." Although Max had never gotten the chance to hold Nico when he was this small.

"No," Nico said with a shake of his head. Nico thought he was right about everything since Nikita had come home. As if, because he was Nikita's older brother he knew more now.

Max just nodded before Nico started to mumble at his younger brother. "Nikitha, Nikitha, Niki..." It seemed Nico had settled on before dropping his head against Max's arm and closing his eyes, his feet tucked under the blanket that was normally thrown over the couch.

Mother's Day - May 11, 2025

Everyone was coming over for Mother's Day, Max had Sophie, Victoria, her partner Tom, and Max's nephews flown in so they could spend the weekend with all of you.

Nico had already told both you and Max that he wanted to camp out in the living room with Luka and Lio when they came. Max had gone into the laundry room and pulled out extra sheets and pillows to make up the couches for the boys to sleep on. You had talked with Victoria about it and she was fine with it.

When everyone arrived you gave Victoria, Tom, and Sophie a tour of the house. The last time Sophie had been here was a week after you and Max got back from your honeymoon, and everything still wasn't unpacked. Victoria and Tom took in the house with fresh eyes, seeing the way that all of your and Max's things fit together in the new space. Nico, Luka, and Lio had gone into Nico's room to play with his toys.

The reason that you had invited everyone over was because both you and Max had been keeping the pregnancy to yourselves since you found out. You finally wanted to tell everyone since it was almost the end of your first trimester.

You had spent the first half of Sunday cooking before Max insisted that Sophie and Victoria take over for you. Sophie gave you a look that told you she knew that something was up.

When you finally sat down for dinner, food and drinks were going around the table. Tom went to fill the wine glass that was in front of you and you let him, wanting to wait to share your news until everyone had food on their plates.

You had been sitting to the left of Max when he reached for your hand, his thumb drawing little circles with the pad of his finger. You had initially planned to tell Sophie and Victoria that you were pregnant just after you and Max had gone back to the doctor. Eventually, you and Max agreed to wait until you were closer to the end of your first trimester.

About halfway through dinner, you could feel a set of eyes on you before looking up to see Sophie looking at you. She lightly tapped her wine glass with her finger before her eyes moved to yours which was still full from when Tom filled it earlier.

Max had taken the last bite of food off his plate before reaching for his glass to take a sip. His eyes traveled to you knowing that you couldn't drink any of the wine that was in your glass.

"I know that it is Mother's Day and we are all here as a family to celebrate the amazing woman in our lives who do so much for us," Max said lifting his glass. "So, Y/N and I have some news to share with you."

Everyone at the table was silent for a few moments before you spoke, "I'm pregnant."

Sophie and Victoria were quick to get out of their chairs hugging you and giving you their congratulations. Tom walked over to Max giving him a hug.

There was a piercing sound of chair legs scraping against the hardwood floor. Nico was quick to walk out of the room leaving everyone to walk downstairs with heavy steps. Victoria was quick to pull away from you and then Max moved his chair to follow after Nico.

You reached for Max's arm stopping him from following Nico, and then got up from your chair. You followed Nico into his bedroom, your fingers lightly rapping on the hardwood of his bedroom door. He looked up from where he lay in bed.

"Hi Mama," He quietly spoke.

"Hey," You moved to sit on the edge of Nico's bed.

You hadn't told Nico that you were pregnant thinking it better to wait a little.

"Are you sad that you're getting a sibling?" You asked.

Nico shook his head no, then shifted in his blue sheets dropping his head against your arm.

"You're my Mama," He whined. You moved to run your fingers through Nico's hair like you would do for Max. "I don't wanna share."

So Nico was upset that he would have to share you with the baby. "You share me with Papa." You told him.

"No, Papa shares you with me." He argued back. You gave Nico a small smile.

When Max wasn't home Nico had all of your attention, and when Max was home, Nico shared you with Max until Nico had to head to bed.

"Do you mind sharing me with Papa?" You asked him.

Nico shook his head no.

"Do you mind sharing me when Luka and Lio spend time with us?" You asked.

Nico shook his head no again and then moved his head into your lap squishing his chubby cheek into the material of your pants.

You weren't really sure what you could say to Nico about this to make him feel better. You and Max were having a baby and Nico would have to understand that the baby would need attention, a lot of attention for the first few months.

"Nico, you know that just because Papa and I are having a baby doesn't mean that we're not going to have time for you."

It was a little odd trying to reason with a four-year-old, but Nico needed to know that having a baby in the house wasn't going to change how much you loved him.

"You forget me with the baby." he blubbered.

"I'm not going to forget you, and neither is Papa." You pulled him into your lap so he could rest his head on your shoulder. "No one is going to replace you." You kissed Nico's cheek and then his hair. You looked up to see Max leaning against the doorway.

He quickly walked inside and sat on the other side of Nico. Nico looked up at Max before laying his head down again.

"How much did you hear?" You mouthed to Max.

He moved his index finger in a circle as if to say all of it. You nodded.

"Nico," Max started. "Mama and I love you, and there being a baby isn't going to change that."

Nico moved away from you and turned toward Max, "Not true."

This was one of those moments where you could tell that Nico had gotten his stubbornness from Max.

"It's true," Max said. "Mama and I are going to be busier taking care of the baby. But we're not going to love you less."

Nico threw himself into your arms, "Baby can have my toys, not my Mama."

Part of you wanted to laugh, Nico was quick to give up all of his toys before he was willing to give you up. You and Max shared a look before you both smiled at one another.

"Well, what if we told you that the baby was for you to have someone to play with?" You asked Nico.

Nico looked up at you before looking over at Max, he furrowed his brows in confusion. "I play with the baby?"

You nodded at Nico. "Yes, and you can share all of your toys with them, and get to go swimming together, and come to Paps's races."

"It's your job as the oldest to protect your younger sibling like I do with Auntie Vic." Max pointed out.

As you and Max told Nico more about the things that he got to do now that he was going to be an older brother you could tell that he was slowly coming around to the idea.

Later on in the evening after the table was cleared Nico and his cousins ended up all asleep on the living room couches while everyone else went out to the back patio. You ended up curled up against Max, his hand on your growing bump while talking with Sophie and Victoria. It was mostly the same stories that you had heard about Max as he grew up. Tom was talking with Max about the end of PSV's season before you all called it a night.

The sound of light voices woke you up, you were tired from the lack of sleep and turned towards Max's side of the bed to see the clock read one hour until you had to feed Nikita again.

You slowly sat up seeing Max, Nico, and Nikita all on the couch that the bed overlooked.

"When can we play?" Nico asked.

"He's too little to play yet," Max replied.

"But Mama said that I could play with him when he came."

"Nico, he's too young to play right now, but once he's older you can play together."

You shifted in the sheets a bit letting out an uncomfortable groan trying to sit up against the pillows behind you. Your pregnancy had gone as smoothly as possible, and the birth was close to perfect. However, you were still sore in your abdomen. Your OB told you if it didn't go away by the next time she saw you, she would end up prescribing you something mild so you could still breastfeed Nikita.

"Mijn leeuwin, are you okay?" Max asked turning away from Nico towards you.

You silently nodded, "Fine, just sore."

Nico had abandoned Max on the couch climbing into bed with you, scooting close in the king-size bed to lay next to you his feet hanging off the edge of the bed, clutching the little brown bear in his arms.

Max got up from the couch and slowly walked over before getting under the bedsheets again, you helped pull back the sheets while Max moved Nikita in his arms to his other side. Nikita's head lay against Max's shoulder still sleeping with Nico throwing his arm over your middle.

You looked over at Max, he pressed his lips together and you knew that he was trying to hold back a few tears before a wide smile broke out on his face.

"I love you." You mouthed silently.

"I love you too." He said back. He quickly reached up and kissed your hair as you snuggled in closer to his side.

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moonsgemini · 8 months

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you’re on your own kid

summary: rafe cameron has loved his best friend through every season, but through the seasons of their senior year things start to get complicated.

warning: she/her, smoking, alcohol, angst, fluff, kissing, cheating ???, drugs, mutual pining, (let me know if I missed any)

wc: 4.7k

an: HIII! I’m really excited for these taylor swift fics bc her songs give me so many ideas. This took a while for me to finish & idk if I like the ending or honestly if I like it at all. I promise seeking arrangements is next on my list to post <3 Hope you guys enjoy !!!

rafe's version masterlist - masterlist

I wait patiently

he’s gonna notice me

it’s okay we’re the best of friends

summer

Of course when he walks in the party instantly feels like an actual party. It hadn’t been much of a party to her especially not with him around. These things got boring fast if he wasn’t by her side making her laugh and talking about anything and everything. Not having to worry about sleazy guys coming up to her or putting something in her drink because he always by her side. Always looking out.

Everybody loves him anyways. The way he carried himself charmed everyone, made them always want to have his attention. Sunglasses perched on his nose, even though it’s eleven at night, that big smile on his face. He’s bobbing his head to the music and greeting everyone, she can tell he’s in a good mood tonight. It puts her in a good mood, her fingers itching to greet him already.

When he finally reaches where she’s standing with a few of her friends he smiles even wider at her. Greeting everyone but always just looking at her. Moving to push his glasses up onto his head. She couldn’t help the smile that tuged at her lips as he side hugs her friends knowing that’s not what she’s going to get.

And she’s right, once he gets to her it’s all outstretched arms and gentle rocking as he hugs her tightly. She’s been away at her grandparents house in florida for the last week of summer. They had missed each other. Face times and text messages just didn’t feel like enough.

“You’re finally back,” He said once they pulled away.

She rolled her eyes playfully a teasing smile on her lips, “Were you counting down the days Cameron?”

He shrugged, “Maybe, I know you were.” That grin never leaving his lips.

“Now come on,” He wrapped his arm around her shoulders beginning to lead her to the kitchen of whoever’s house this was, “I need a drink and you need to tell me about Florida.”

“I already told you everything every day Rafe. Just sat out by the pool or on the beach,” She motioned towards her body, “got some new clothes.”

He raised his eyebrows eyeing her body, “Some very tiny clothes,” His eyes took in her mini skirt and tank top all the exposed skin doing something to him, “Any guys out there?” He didn’t look at her as he asked. Instead he grabbed a beer out of the fridge, cracking it open with his back to her.

She scoffed, “Florida boys? No thanks.”

He turned around smirking, “So just North Carolina boys for you?”

There was a look in his eyes that she couldn’t quite read. Every now and then he’d give it to her and her mind would spiral on what he could be thinking. She always hoped it was the same thing she was, “Mhmm only North Carolina boys.”

I hear it in your voice

You're smoking with your boys

I touch my phone as if it's your face

I didn't choose this town

I dream of getting out

There's just one who could make me stay

fall

Everything had felt boring lately. After the summer and after the start of senior year she felt like the parties in outer banks were a waste of time. It was always the same people doing the same things. Kids too young to know what’s good for them and too young to care about the consequences of their actions. Not a care in the world knowing mommy or daddy would get you out of whatever stupid decision you made.

She’d spent most of her high school career pretending to like parties and drinking. Even tried coke once but it made her feel like her brain was rotting so never again. When in reality she’d rather be home smoking on her balcony reading a good book or hanging out with her close friends around a bonfire. It was exhausting always having to put up a front that she was this social party girl.

It took her a long time to come to the realization that she didn’t have to be what people thought of her. On figure eight it felt like everyone knew your business and everyone thought they knew you. They start seeing you at parties talking to Rafe Cameron and all of a sudden you’re some party girl with a drug problem. Once people found out Rafe quit doing coke and dealing she just became the party girl. Kook prince and kook princess always stuck to each others sides, of course she was going go gain a reputation.

Once she realized that people are going to talk regardless what she did so she stopped caring. Started staying home more. Rafe kind of hated it. Because she wasn’t there anymore. But he made it work with their busy senior schedules. Always saying he can make time for his best friend. That’s what she was. His best friend.

best friend.

Even saying it in her head made her cringe. If only he knew that she wanted something more so badly. At first she didn’t even see him that way, he truly was a great friend. He listened to all her rants about music, school, books. Rafe paid attention, he was soft with her. She didn’t understand why people always said bad things about him because he never showed those sides to her.

She sighed thinking about him, sitting on her balcony. The thought of him was brought on by everyone’s instagram stories of the party currently happening. She had opted for one of those smoke on the balcony with a good show or book nights.

As she scrolled through her phone more it began to vibrate. Rafe’s contact popping up on the top of the screen. A warm feeling spread through her stomach, maybe it was just because of the weed. She pressed the green button and brought the phone up to her ear. Admiring the little picture of him first, it was one she took right before she had left for florida. He was holding up their friends dog with a big smile on his face.

“Hello?”

“Heyyy,” A raspy voice said on the other line. Immediately she knew he had been smoking as well, probably with all the guys outside. He could even still be passing the joint around. He could also be smoking a cigarette outside after he’s gotten a buzz, it was his favorite thing to do after a few beers.

She put the laptop that was resting on her to the side, bringing her knees up to her chest. Leaning her head to the side on her knees she smiled softly, “Hi Rafe, you rang?”

He can hear her smile. Rafe knows her like the back of his hand.

“I did, what are you up to?” He knows exactly what she’s doing tonight even though she didn’t even tell him.

The wide grin on her lips dulling slightly, “Uh just looking at some schools in california, also watching new girl.”

“Still wanna leave this place huh?”

She let out a breathy laugh picking at the thread on her bench, “You know me too well.”

“Of course I do. I’m coming over,” She could hear him walking on gravel.

“My parents are asleep Rafe,” It was almost one in the morning and her parents had some golf charity event early in the morning.

He laughed amused, “Okay? What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It’s supposed to mean you have to climb up to my room on the second floor or stay at that party,” Her tone was stern not wanting him to get her in trouble but also praying he’ll come and not wake them.

“Hey I gotta convince you to stay close to me after high school so you brought this on yourself,” He was walking to her house. She didn’t live too far from where this party was and he didn’t want to drive after smoking and drinking. At his words her hand tightened around her phone closing her eyes for a second imagining he was there saying that to her but in a different context.

Rafe didn’t have to do anything to convince her. He was the only one who kept her here. It was why she was still mulling over the idea of leaving the outer banks.

“You better at least be bringing a joint for us,” She sighed feeling giddy about him coming over. He always made her feel like a school girl with a big crush on the cutest boy in school.

“Already had one with your name on it babe,” He always threw that word around like it meant nothing. It meant everything to her.

They bid their goodbyes as Rafe was a few houses away. Less than ten minutes later she heard rustling under her. Rafe was climbing the tree by her room. He stepped onto the ledge before getting hoping down.

“Rafe,” She shushed him harshly hoping her dad didn’t hear. His heavy feet landing with a thud.

He looked at her with a smirk, “oops.” He shrugged not really caring if he was loud. Grabbing her legs that were laid out on the bench and sat down placing them on top. One hand on her shin and the other right above her knee.

He leaned his head back looking at her. That contagious grin on his face his eyes hooded and a bit red from his night out, “So ms. I wanna run away. What’s this thing you’re trying to escape,”

She sighed leaning back, “Dunno. I guess everything. I want to start somewhere new, it’s hard when people think they know everything about you.”

He let out a short laugh, “Yeah tell me about it. Maybe we should escape together, I think you’re the only person who doesn’t see a douche bag when they look at me.”

Her heart burst. If they were in a cartoon there’d be hearts swirling around her head and violins playing.

She shook her head smiling, “No one sees you as a douche bag,” She smirked, “anymore.”

“It doesn’t matter because the family company will be mine after college and people will see that I’m more than just a pretty face with a bad attitude,” He smirked.

“You are a pretty face with a bad attitude,” She agreed before holding her hand out, “Also you have something for me no?”

He patted her legs, “How could I ever think you forgot.”

They smoked and talked all night. She put on a movie on her laptop but it was more of background noise. At almost four in the morning she started to drift off to sleep and soon she was asleep on Rafe’s lap. She just felt so comfortable and warm with his hand rubbing circles on her shoulder.

He carried her to her bed and tucked her in because he knew she got cold easily. He sat next to her on the bed and brushed a strand of hair out of her face. A small smile on his face, these were the nights he cherished with her. When the world felt so quiet that it seemed like they were the only people existing. No interruptions from their friends or their parents.

Just him and his girl.

I search the party of better bodies

Just to learn that you never cared

winter

She pushed through the crowd of people while scanning the room for the 6’2 man she was meeting. It was the first party she had come to since summer and she was only there because he had begged her to come. It was a christmas sweater party so she had on a red sweater with kittens playing with presents. She had gotten it with Rafe a week ago at a vintage store, it was the whole reason he even brought up this party. Telling her it’d be the perfect place to wear it to.

Spotting her friend Emma she went up to her, “Hey have you seen Rafe? he hasn’t been answering me.”

“I swear I saw him going to the bathroom like a few minutes ago,” She pointed towards the hallway.

“Thanks,” She waved and walked towards the hall.

It was much quieter in this part of the house. She’d never been here before so she didn’t know where the bathroom was. There was a door on her right and left and one straight ahead. She decided to check them all. She opened the door on the left and it was just a closet with towels. The door on her right was the bathroom. She was confused because wasn’t he supposed to be there.

She turned towards the last door and saw some light coming from under. She had a gut feeling this wasn’t going to be good. Slowly she walked towards the door and opened it just like ripping a band aid off and

ouch.

Rafe on top of Taylor Thompson. His hand under her sweater and his lips on her. Taylor’s hands in his hair. At the sound of the door opening Rafe turned around and the girl under him sat up to look.

“Shit,” He muttered feeling his heart sink.

She stood there in complete shock for a second before speaking, “Sorry to interrupt.” She slammed the door closed. Holding back her tears until she was in her car alone. Her feet knowing where to take her as her mind was elsewhere. Why would he do that? The last few months had felt different to her. It felt like there was a possibility of something more.

It felt like he literally ripped her heart out and shoved out down Taylor Thompson’s throat. That blonde bi-

“Y/n! Wait!” Rafe called as he chased after her.

She ignored him not really wanting to see him until she got her emotions in order. Now it was clear he wanted nothing to do with her and never cared about her, at least not in the say way. She didn’t want him to see her cry over him, it felt pathetic. They were outside now she had finally reached her car. Clicking the buttons to unlock it furiously.

“Stop!” Rafe said as he jogged to push her car door closed before she opened it all the way.

“What!” She yelled turning around to him. A look of anger in her eyes.

He took a step back seeing how upset she actually was, “I-It’s not what it looks like.”

She rolled her eyes, “I don’t care Rafe.” Crossing her arms defensively.

He furrowed his brows, “Then why are you leaving?”

“Because I can.”

“Y/n-“

“Rafe! I don’t want to third wheel all night so go fuck Taylor Thompson like you want, I don’t give a shit.” She seethed, tears pricking at her eyes.

He shook his head, “I don’t want to fuck her.”

“Then why were you kissing her?”

“I thought you didn’t care,” Now he was getting mad for some reason.

“Fuck you Rafe.”

He laughed bitterly, “Tell me why it bothered you so much.”

She scoffed confused, “What?”

“Why did me kissing her bother you?”

“Because it didn’t bother you. You just didn’t care,”

“About what?” He took a step closer. He was trying to get her to say it. To say that she cared because she liked him.

He knows he fucked up but after her reaction he realized that he had convinced himself she didn’t care when she did. Then he may have taken a few shots and gone into the guest room to breathe and call her. But then Taylor Thompson came in right when the tequila was kicking in and things got blurry. She was on him and he didn’t stop it and she tugged him on the bed and he just couldn’t move or stop. He also couldn’t stop thinking about y/n as it was all happening, wishing it was her.

“About me,” She sighed looking down voice so small.

“I care about you.”

She looked up at him with a frown. She sighed frustrated being able to hold her tears anymore as a few slipped down her cheeks, “No you don’t. If you did you wouldn’t have kissed her.”

She turned around quickly opening her car door and getting in. Rafe got what he wanted, to hear her say it. But maybe he fucked up so bad he can’t fix it. He steps back as her car starts and watches her drive away.

She can barely see between her tears as she drives home. She felt dumb. She felt like he was using her to make his ego bigger. Why did he have to ruin it? The one person who kept her tied to where she is had betrayed her the most. She knew he didn’t owe her any loyalty but she couldn’t help the way she felt.

I picked the petals, he loves me not

Something different bloomed

Writing in my room

spring

Three and a half months.

It’d been three and a half months of Rafe and her not talking.

After she left the party she promised herself she would never speak to him again. He hurt her and she couldn’t believe she’d let it happen. Feeling dumb for feeling the way she does towards him. How could she have let herself fall for him so much?

He had called and texted her relentlessly at first. Even tried to go up to her in school but she’d quickly turn and walk away from him. After a month of trying to get her to talk to him he gave up. He fucked it up more than he thought. Rafe gave her the space she wanted but he’d always be there in the background if she needs him.

Y/n couldn’t take it anymore. She couldn’t take him always looking at her with those eyes. Couldn’t take all the time she was spending alone. She thought she liked being alone and spending time alone but she also liked all the time she spent with him. He made her feel so care free and light. The anxiety that was constantly bubbling in her stomach would diminish around him because she didn’t have to pretend to be someone she’s not.

But enough was enough.

Ever since middle school she had kept a diary. A few stacks of books tucked away in the back of her closet hid her deepest feelings and every detail about her life. The current one she had been filling was almost full and the last quarter of the notebook was all Rafe. Well to be honest he was in all of them, and not in a weird way. He was just always there, they were always together.

But now that they didn’t spend time together her pages consisted of rants of her boring school days and writing different scenarios she had wished happened that night instead of what did. She had ranted about how he made her feel and how she felt seeing him on some other girl. A girl that wasn’t her. It should have been her.

After everything they had done together how could he not see her in the way she sees him? Maybe he did live up to his cold hearted reputation. Even though he had never done anything wrong before. She actually can’t remember the last time she saw him hook up with anyone. Not since the beginning of junior year and back then he was fully in his coke addiction. She remembers that night like it was yesterday.

They had become friends around that time the year before. Summer before sophomore year they met at midsummers when she caught him and his friends in the storage closet drinking from a bottle of vodka. Y/n told them she wouldn’t say anything if they let her have some. Rafe immediately liked her, she knew what she wanted and she got it.

Now it was a year later and he can feel her eyes on him as he kissed some rich touron. He was high out of his mind and he just wanted to make y/n jealous. But it didn’t work, the look he had caught from her as he trailed behind the redhead he just met was one more of disappointment. He felt his heart clench at the feeling. After that night he decided to get clean and stop the hard drugs because he hated that look.

She couldn’t take it anymore, keeping all of her feelings on sheets of paper. She needed to find him and yell at or just do something. He has confused her for years now and she was sick of it. Especially now that Rafe and her were closer than ever. All her pent of feelings seeped through as she sighed exasperatedly, putting her pen that had been furiously writing down. Slamming it on the desk as she harshly pushed herself up from her desk.

With anger she had stormed out of the house and driven to his. Her sneakers stomping on the ground as she marched towards him. Every one of their memories together flashing through her head.

She had spotted him on the dock and was b lining towards him. Rafe’s head turned as he heard her stomping towards him. His stomach flipped when his eyes landed on y/n, he had really missed seeing her around. Especially at his house. He propped his sunglasses up on his head and hopped back onto the dock. He had been getting the boat ready for a solo boat day to clear his head.

“Y/n?” He asked in disbelief.

“You!” She pointed at him and stopping once her finger was poking his chest, “Why are you the way you are!” Her finger jabbing into his chest with every word.

He watched as her chest rose and fell quickly. He had never really seen her mad before, something he always admired. But now seeing her with furrowed brows and steam practically coming out of her ears, he kind of liked it. Rafe knows he shouldn’t be thinking about how cute she looks and instead be getting on his knees begging for forgiveness.

He had really missed seeing her up close. Missed how dark her lashes were and how glossy her plump lips always were. He counted all her freckles to make sure she didn’t get any new ones while they were away from each other. Her hair was in a style he hadn’t seen on her before.

“Well hi to you too,” He smirked. He couldn’t help himself, couldn’t help use the charm he knew she loved.

She placed her palms on his chest and shoved him, barely making him move. Y/n began ranting, “For the last fucking four years you have been my best friend and you’ve been so confusing! Everything was fine at first but-but then you were always there for me whenever. And you always fucking listened to me. And you’re so funny. I started to feel different and then I saw you at that fucking party,” She glared at him, the image of him on that girl making her nauseous, “And then you changed. You don’t hook up with anyone and you don’t leave my side at parties,” she laughed sarcastically, “You even fucking call me babe sometimes. So I though oh maybe he feels different too then again I saw you on some fucking girl. And you chase after me so Rafe what the fuck do you want from me? Has this all just been bullshit to you? Am I just some fucking girl you get to flirt with to get your weird little fix until you find someone you actually want to be with?”

He rolled his eyes almost offended, “You know you’re not just some girl.”

She scoffed with wide eyes, “That’s all you took away from that. What else am I supposed to think? You make me feel special for years and I just wait and wait. Then when I think things are finally happening you go and kiss some girl.”

“Y/n-“

“Who fucking knows what would have happened if I hadn’t walked in.”

“Can I-“

“I know you would have fucked her and then came home to me to talk about your problems like I’m some wife in the 50s.”

“You-“

“You kill me Rafe.”

“Stop!” He practically shouted as he placed his hands on her shoulders. She closed her mouth and stared at him intensely.

“I was afraid you didn’t feel the same so I kept my feelings down. I’ve liked you since the moment I met you. But I was fucked up then so I didn’t act like it until I saw how much I hurt you. I changed for you and-and then I just got scared. You are someone so beyond me, you are like the nicest smartest most beautiful person. Why the fuck would you want me?” He laughed like it was obvious, “And we’re such good friends it was terrifying to think about how if I fucked it up I wouldn’t have you at all. No one’s ever actually tried to get to know me the way you have. And then I did fuck it up again,” he sighed scratching the back of his neck, “I shouldn’t have let her kiss me that night. I should have found you and told you what I’ve been feeling since I met you. That I love you so much it actually hurts. And it’s hurt me knowing I made you upset.”

“Rafe,” She sighed as her eyes softened. This was not going at all how she expected things to go.

“I get I fucked it up, so if you still never want to see me again that’s fine. But please give me a chance,” He was actually contemplating getting on his knees to beg.

“You’re such a big dumby. You’ve always had a chance. You mean so much to me. Rafe the only reason I haven’t applied to out of state schools is because I want to be with you. Even if it was just as friends,” She sighed feeling like a weight had been lifter off of her shoulders. A part of her still wanted to punch him.

He took a step closer lifting his hand and softly brushing his fingers across her cheek as he cupped her face, “Will you please go out with me? Because I am so in love with you.”

She leaned up towards him. Their noses now brushing, “I love you,”

He smiled as he pulled her towards him, their lips meeting. The kiss felt like every taylor swift love song playing at once. All the yearning felt worth it in that moments. Their lips moved against each other languidly, like they’ve always been doing this. Rafe’s hands moved to her waist, gripping in all the right places.

Y/n’s hand ran through his hair tugging when his hands reached lower giving her butt a squeeze.Rafe melted at her soft sighs and quiet moans as he trailed kisses down to her neck. Kissing behind her ear. He kissed her cheek as he faced her again. Her hazy eyes and swollen lips made his blood flow to a certain lower part of his body.

“Rafe, this doesn’t mean I’m not still kinda mad at you. You have a lot of making up to do,” She smiled innocently at him.

“Baby I’ll give you whatever you want. In fact, let’s go shopping now for our date tonight,” He kissed her one more time before moving to hold her hand dragging her towards his car.

She laughed as she trailed behind him knowing that one shopping trip wasn’t going to make it better. He owed her big time.

“It also doesn’t mean we’re boyfriend and girlfriend because you haven’t asked me,” She smiled smugly at him as he opened the door to his truck for her.

“I guess I have my work cut out for me then,” He said leaning against the frame of door once she had sat down.

“you do.”

He leaned up and kissed her softly, “Anything for you baby.”

#rafe cameron #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron x reader #rafe fic #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron fanfic #rafe cameron blurb #rafe cameron series #rafe cameron au #rafe cameron outer banks #rafe x reader #rafe obx #rafe fanfiction

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princesachicana · 11 months

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𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞 pt.2

a/n: it's finally here!! how long has it been?! first things first i want to say thank you to everyone who's been rooting for this fic!! I honestly hit a huge writers block and had no motivation to write!! but all the sweet messages from people saying they enjoyed my work has made me so happy!!! SO ONCE AGAIN THANK U AND I HOPE U ENJOY!! I tried my EXTRA HARDEST SO I HOPE THIS GIVES U THE CLOSURE YALL WANTED I LOVE YOU SM! ALSO THIS IS NOT PROOF READ SO PLEASE EXCUSE ANY MISTAKES!! I JUST WANTED TO FINALLY POST FOR U GUYS!!

It took a lot out of you not to stay in bed the next morning. The softness of your bed wrapped around your body gives you some sort of comfort. But of course, staying in bed would only make you feel worse. At least if you got up it would be easier to fake happiness. To no surprise, your phone was flooded with missed calls and texts from both Steven and Belly. Of course, you only responded to belly telling her that you'll explain your reasoning for ditching your "date" with Steven later.

Why did Steven even bother leaving you so many texts last night? If you were such a bother to him? Annoying. That's what he thinks you are. And what if you never heard those disgusting things he said about you? and went on the date with him? Would he just continue to lead you on?

Steven: waiting for you by the pool.

Steven: ur late

Steven: u look pretty even though i can't even see you. pls im starving

Steven: is belly holding you hostage?

Steven: it's been 18 minutes cmon.

Steven: the guys are going to laugh at me for being stood up I'm getting nervous.

Steven: did something happen are you okay?

Steven: belly is worried as well lmk.

You laughed at the messages blinking back angry tears that threatened to fall. Gosh! he was so fake. You could only imagine how relieved he must have been to not hang out with you.

Belly: have funnnn

Belly: no funny business!!

Belly: wait where did you go?!

Belly: Steven keeps pacing back and forth waiting for u

Belly: what’s going on?

Belly: just let us know ur okay

Belly: y/n ??!?!??

Y/n: hey, something came up last night sorry I had you worried. can u come over?

Belly arrived 20 minutes later. You spent the time together watching reruns of your favorite Disney show. “Do you want to talk about it?” Belly asked after a while, noticing something was bothering you.

“I overheard the guys talking about me last night.” You fiddled with the throw blanket that was on your lap. “At first it was just them teasing Steven about our date or whatever.” You took a deep breath upset that you felt like crying. “But Steven only agreed to hang out with me…” You paused blinking back tears. Belly moved closer immediately pulling you into a hug. “He only agreed to hang out with me…so I could stop annoying him! I honestly don’t know what I did wrong?” You pulled away from belly’s arms wiping your tears that had fallen.

“Maybe I was too forward? but I just wanted to see if he felt the same way…it was dumb.” You shrugged. Belly shook her head “Nope my brother is a fucking idiot!” she stood up taking your hand in hers and pulling you up. “I won’t let you mope around all day because of him!” You sighed “I don’t even have a choice do I?” Belly laughed shaking her head. “What do you say we go to the boardwalk? Taylor’s coming in today too” she smirked.

“And maybe someone would be happy to see you I don’t know” she whispered with a grin. “What are you talking about?” You questioned. “Well you know Xavier..the one that works the lemonade stand?” You nodded your head yes. “Well, he totally has the hots for you.” You cringed at her word choice. “He does not!” You laughed. “Oh, he does! you were too busy ogling my brother last summer you didn’t notice him ogling you.” she poked your side teasingly.

“Now let’s go!”

“Stay still before I poke your eye out” Taylor groans finishing up your eyeliner. You were now at the Fisher’s beach house getting ready to go down to the boardwalk. You laugh pulling away “I think that’s enough…if you make my eyeliner any thicker I’d cry!” Taylor playfully pushes your head away. “Sorryyyyy i want to make Xavier fall to his knees when he sees you!” You frown when she brings that name up. Sure, Xavier was a nice guy…and he was cute…but he wasn’t Steven.

You’d always imagined Steven being your first everything. First kiss, first date, first time. It was something you’d dreamt of all this time.

“Yeah…im going to get a snack before we head out do y’all want anything?” You ask heading towards the door. Both girls gave you a sympathetic smile shaking their heads no.

As you reached the kitchen you stopped in your tracks. Steven turned from looking into the fridge. You made eye contact for about 5 seconds before you beelined for the cabinets. “Hey,” Steven broke the silence as you pulled out a granola bar. You felt the warmth of his stare and turned finding him now leaning against the counter. “Hey…” you whispered looking anywhere but his face. “So you gonna tell me what happened last night?” Steven crossed his arms around his chest.

“Just didn’t feel up for it anymore ..” You shrugged nonchalantly. “That’s it?” Steven scoffed. “Yeah…that’s it” you whispered about to walk away. “What’s going on? I’m like so confused right now.” Steven gently gripped your arm. “Nothing just forget it…it’s not like you wanted to go anyways.” you rolled your eyes. “And what makes you think that?” He muttered eyes scouring your face for the truth. “Um, I don’t know let’s see …you quite literally ignored me this entire week!” You responded sarcastically.

“I didn’t mean to. I had a lot of shit on my mind alright?” Steven uttered softly. It almost felt genuine. The words he spoke just last night almost became liquid. “Yeah like what?” You whispered eventually looking into his eyes. “You can tell me..” You spoke gently stepping into him closer. No matter how much he’s hurt you. Steven would always make you melt. “Nothing let’s just forget about it…he pulled away opening up the fridge once again.”

It was like a switch was flipped. How he went right back to that cold shoulder he had been giving you all week. “You're a fucking asshole” You spewed, already ready to walk out of the kitchen. “Where are you going?” He abruptly spoke again. “The boardwalk…you know? so I won’t annoy you here.” With that, you left a confused and remorseful Steven behind.

“Hey, look y/n why don’t you go get a lemonade?” Belly suggested with an eyebrow raise. Shit. you were hoping they forgot about that. “Guys I don’t feel up for this..” You pouted looking between both Taylor and Belly. “Noooo go talk to him! you look hot as fuck.” Taylor gently grabbed your face giving you a mini pep talk.

“What if Xavier wants to hang out..I cant just ditch you guys?!?” You were stalling and they knew it. “We’ll be here waiting for you” Belly smiled. “Just try to have fun alright? But hey if you don’t really want to do it …we’ll back off” She narrowed her eyes at Taylor. “No…I’ll go” You laughed giving both of them a hug “Thank you guys.i really appreciate this.” You’d definitely still be moping around in your room about Steven if it wasn’t for Belly and Taylor. They both wished you luck as you headed straight for the lemonade stand.

As soon as he spotted you. The biggest smile spread across his face. “y/n? damn, it’s been so long” Xavier greeted you with a hug. “It’s only been a year!” You playfully ruffled his curly hair that sat atop his head. “That’s way too long…I enjoy seeing pretty girls year-round.” He spoke smoothly, he definitely knew how to talk to girls. “Shut up” You laughed pushing him away with not that much force.

“I have an hour lunch break…you up for arcade games?”

“So…you seeing anyone?” Xavier asked as he ate a scoop of his mint chocolate chip ice cream. You thought about it for a moment. Technically no you weren’t seeing anyone. But you knew you were still hung up on Steven. A day at the boardwalk with Xavier wouldn’t change that. “It’s complicated…I guess” Xavier sighed “I've been there…it’s rough” You nodded you were curious as to what he meant but you didn’t want to be nosey.

“Hey, look they have street fighter..” Xavier smirked. “Want to go a couple of rounds?” You nodded immediately pulling him towards the game. “Mhhm loser buys the winner a funnel cake!” You suggested with a chuckle. “Ouuu im so down y/n” Xavier squeezed your hand that held his quickly striding towards the arcade game.

Just two more steps, Just two more steps and you’d be fine. The rowdy yelling completely threw you off. You stopped in place looking behind you where the voices were coming from. You had no time to move out of the way, no time to prevent this from happening.No time to stop the trio of boys that you knew all too well. Suddenly a body collided with Xavier, the force immediately making your intertwined hands lose. “Dude, what the fuck?” Xavier groaned. It was then that you snapped back into reality. Eyes wide when you noticed Xavier’s ice cream now all over his shirt.

“What’s up? how are we doing?” That voice full of humor made you scoff. Steven stood tall a smile on his face. You hated that it kind of made your heart flutter. “Steven, what is your problem?” You gestured towards Xavier’s now ice cream stained shirt. “He’ll be fine y/n it’ll wash out.” Steven laughed, but once he noticed you didn’t find this funny at all he frowned. “I’m sorry man, I just came over to say what’s up..” You ignored Steven’s apology not believing he meant it. “Hey want me to help you get cleaned up?” You asked Xavier voice full of concern.

“No.I got it…I’ll see y’all later.” Xavier spoke nonchalantly as he walked away. When he was out of eyesight you brushed past steven heading out the door.

“Y/n” Steven immediately followed behind you. His long legs make it easier for him to catch up with you. “You embarrassed me” You stopped outside the arcade, letting him pull you to the side. “Embarrassed? sorry to interrupt your little date” Steven scoffed. “It's not a date we were just hanging out, why do you care?” You groaned running your hands down your face. “Maybe because just yesterday you were supposed to hang out with me?” Steven spoke definitively.

“Oh my god, just earlier you agreed to forget about it,” you said with an eye roll. “It was dumb, stop acting like you care just go home Steven I did you a favor.” He shook his head “What are you talking about right now?” Steven pulled you in closer, one of his hands placed on your waist. The other coming to the side of your face, willing you to look at him.

“I heard you.i heard everything,” you spoke up voice hoarse. Steven’s heart carried pain at the tears that stood brimming in your eyes. The realization was clear when he made the connection. “And you know..who cares what Jeremiah and Conrad think! what hurt the most was you.” You shrieked. You hated that you were crying in front of him. You hated that when he hauled you against his chest you felt secure.

“I'm sorry baby... I'm sorry” Steven sounded voice vulnerable. Leaving kisses atop your head. “Why would you say that?” you sobbed breaking down in front of the boy who caused it. “I didn't mean any of it” Steven brought your face between his hands once again. “But you said it..it still fucking hurts Steven.”

You wiped your face getting prepared to pull away and walk back home.

“Wait, please let me talk to you.” Steven begged. “okay” you replied being prepared to cry all over again. “My head has been all fucked up..and that isn't an excuse I know” Steven looked down as if he couldn't construct the next words. “Please don't shut me out.” you pleaded gently. “I want you...i have all this time.” Steve confessed for the first time.

“—And I didn't want to fuck anything up we've..been so close all our lives if I ever messed that up I would never forgive myself.” It's as if you were dreaming, the boy you loved stood in front of you disclosing his feelings for you. “And what? this whole week of you acting cold towards me, were you trying to avoid your feelings?” Steven bobbed his head “Yes, if I lied to myself it would make lying to everyone else easier because the fucking truth is I want you so bad” You didn't tell him but at that moment you forgave him.

“And you called me the annoying one?” You giggled pushing on his chest gently. “Right now we could have been making out on the beach….but noo you had to be a brooding boy” Steven tickled your side, causing you to squirm in his arms. “Yeah, my fault can I kiss you now? been practically wanting to my whole life.” Steven threw his head back fake pouting setting one hand over his chest. You figured you'd throw his words right back at him. “You're so desperately desperate”

Steven smirked “Yeah for you? I am” Those words welcomed a whole lot of beautiful feelings. At that moment is when Steven bent down bringing his lips down onto your own. As your lips moved together, butterflies erupted in your belly. You smiled against his lips when you both needed a breath. “Hey, by the way, your not off the hook.. I'm still sort of pissed at you.” You declared pointing a finger into his chest.

“Yeah, I figured” He laughed wrapping his arms even tighter around you. “How about I make it up to you this whole week? I'm taking you out on dates…ill even get on my knees if I have to. I'm going to follow you around like a puppy.” Steven rambled on. You laughed out loud covering your mouth with your hands. “Oh, it's funny?” Steven raised an eyebrow suggestively. “Yeah, you're such a loser.” You joked.

Before Steven could respond you tugged him into another kiss. Perhaps everything wasn't one hundred percent fixed. But you and Steven were finally here together. You and Steven were finally in each other's arms that's all that mattered. You’d figure out the rest together.

tags 🤍: @gillybear17 @snowsharkk @tesssastle @conradsupporterr @alyssa-cabrera @eranthisphiny @xoxoloverb @lostaurorax @lanisdreams @alexzluvz @lalaland-notfound @liltimmyst @unsaidjaelineose @buckys2thicc @lilygreennn @t8lzw @medusaslilsister @1-800-stilinski @yazmi710 @j-brielmalfoy @ashcannotwrite @colbysbrocks @exonct07 @multilover19 @mimisparkle12

@littlefreaksatellite @vintagebitc @lexi-2004 @melllinaa @xcallmetaniax @brizzlessizzler @haroldpotterson @livinginaglasspalace @delicatekidpeanut @queenanababy

@drinkawinchester @sarahbutnot @salvatoremikaelson54 @furiouscopsherduniversity @marrigold-2002 @angeliquelunasstuff @mariaelizabeth21-blog1 @daphnen21 @ietss @imanaforever @itsreynasworld @she-is-a-happy-girl @joeybandthings

@kateisintrouble @stvrdustalexx @fictionisjustbetter @whezzy223

@conradssupporterr @clubmeredith13 @fatduck45 @trampstampz @fangirl-kimora

@just-let-me-fangirl-in-peace @reenfluffmarshmallow @kaz-mf-brekker

@yazmunson @bookg1rl @hockey-lover86

@just-a-pink-lady @moo-b1tch

#tsitp series #tsitp x you #tsitp fanfic #the summer i turned pretty #the summer i turned pretty fanfic #belly conklin #steven conklin x reader #steven conklin imagine #steven conklin tsitp #tsitp #prime video tsitp #prime video #Conrad fisher #jeremiah fisher

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joeys-babe · 6 months

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Joey B Imagines: Touchdown Celebrations

————————————————————————-

Summary: The gender reveal of your second pregnancy, and third baby, has to top the first reveal. You and Joe decide you want to incorporate the team again just like you did with the twins’ and even go on to decide to do it during a game… but still keep it secretive to the outside world.

Warnings: fluff, pregnancy

Pairing: Joe Burrow x reader

Imagine universe: Into The Mystic

————————————————————————-

*18 weeks pregnant*

Another day at Paycor Stadium, except today wasn't just any day… today Joe and I would be finding out the gender of our third baby.

The twins’ gender reveal had been a hot topic on the internet after the story was told, and Joe and I both knew we'd have to step it up even more.

I can honestly say that I planned pretty much everything by myself last time, but this time around Joe had been bouncing ideas off of me constantly.

The team was going to be the stars of the show once again. It made sense because of how present they were in Joe and me’s lives, the boy's lives, and the pregnancy of the unborn baby still inside my womb.

I sat in the box with Robin on my right, Miles on her lap, and Tyson on my left.

Both of us were waiting patiently for the guys to run out and the outcome of the coin toss since it would be telling us how much longer we would have to wait for Joe and his offense to be on the field.

We would be on offense when the reveal of our baby's gender would happen.

This was how it was going to go down.

On our offense’s opening drive, Joe would ideally try to get the ball to one of his guys, ending in a touchdown.

The entire offense would go to the end zone, minus Joe of course, and either flex their arms for a boy or do a ballerina spin for a girl.

At first, Joe loved the idea but hated the flexing vs spinning because he found it subjective and kinda sexist.

He couldn't come up with any alternatives so Joe reluctantly agreed to the original idea.

Before the game, Coach Taylor kicked Joe out of the locker room and told the offense the gender of the baby.

Now that the guys knew what they were doing, all we needed was a touchdown.

Both Robin and I had spent the last 10 minutes trying to explain everything to Tyson and Miles in the best possible way you can to two two-year-olds.

Even though they still couldn't understand, their attention was immediately lost when “Dada” ran out onto the field.

I will never get tired of seeing them getting so excited watching their father do what he loves.

Miles had squirmed off of his grandma’s lap and was standing at the railing by his twin as they jumped up and down, cheering for their favorite person.

The moment was so blissful and sweet that I almost couldn't hear Robin talking to me.

“So, have you gotten sick yet? I know you had really bad morning sickness with the twins so I wanted to see if there was a difference.” - Robin

My hand dropped to the small bump that was just now starting to show through my shirt.

“No sickness which is insane. Joe thinks it's a girl because of that.” - you smiled

“I think it is too.” - Robin grinned

I stood up and walked down to the railing to coral the boys back to their seats, thankfully they chose not to fight back.

——

When Joe and his guys took the field, both Robin and I were high on excitement. She took one of my hands and squeezed it tight.

I could tell that Joe was trying to get down to the end zone quicker than normal.

Because of that, it wasn't long till they were within the 25-yard line.

Robin and I were practically bubbling with a mix of nerves and pure ecstasy.

Jimmy stood up at the top of the box talking to a few other people while still paying attention to the field in hopes of finding out what his next grandbaby would be.

The offense didn't keep us waiting too long for a touchdown. My heart was beating so fast as Tee caught the pass and waved the rest of the guys into the end zone.

Joe stood a few feet away, his heart beating just as fast, and he looked up at you and his boys waiting patiently for the results.

He so wished he was with you, but he knew he'd try to get you down to him during halftime to celebrate.

The O-line, receivers, and the rest of the guys started doing a ballerina spin.

“It’s a girl!” - Robin yelled and hugged you

My eyes welled up with tears as I watched Joe jump up in down out of pure excitement. He was finally going to be the girl dad he's always wanted to be.

“Joe looks so happy.” - Jimmy

“He wanted a girl so bad.” - you cried

“Congratulations sweetie, I'm so happy for you guys.” - Robin

Jimmy handed me a tissue knowing I would be mad AF if my makeup ran.

Tyson and Miles both stared at me confused, before looking at each other to confirm they were seeing the same thing.

“Mama?” - Miles

“You wokay?” - Tyson

“I’m perfect, guys. I'm really happy actually because Mommy has a baby girl in her belly. That's why Daddy’s friends did that little dance after Uncle Tee got the touchdown.” - you

“Baby Girl?” - Tyson

“Yup. You guys are going to have a baby sister in a few months.” - you

Miles and Tyson smiled widely and moved forward to my bump. They laid their little heads on it to be closer to their sister.

“Is it Daddy’s bwaby… too?” - Miles

Robin and I busted out laughing before I composed myself enough to answer him.

“Yes, it's your daddy’s baby too.” - you

My eyes shifted down to the sidelines where Joe was still celebrating with a wide smile on his face. Everyone was hugging him and patting him on the back.

I didn't think my heart could warm any more than it already had, but when I realized Joe was crying and continuously wiping his eyes I thought my heart was going to explode.

“Dada’s cryin’!” - Tyson

“It’s because he's happy, baby.” - you

Ty scooted closer to me and laid his head on my shoulder.

“Are you happy for a baby sister?” - you

“Mhm. We can match!” - Tyson

“You wanna match with sissy? Like you do with Miles?” - you

“Yes!” - Tyson

——

As soon as it hit halftime, a security guard escorted me and the boys down to the locker room after Joe texted me saying Zac gave him the okay to talk to me for a second.

Both of my hands were occupied with holding a twin’s hand in mine as we walked down the hallway.

We rounded the corner and my pase quickened when I saw that familiar tall frame leaning up against the wall.

Once we were within a foot of him I let go of the twin’s hands and ran up to Joe, who had his arms wide open for me.

“Baby, I can't believe we're having a girl.” - Joe wrapped his arms around you

“Me either. I'm so excited.” - you

“I am too. I get to be a girl dad.” - Joe

“Yes, you do, baby. I can't wait to pick out a name for her and start brainstorming nursery ideas with you.” - you

“I’m going to spoil the living daylights out of her… and you too, mama.” - Joe

I laughed as I pulled away, thinking of a response in the meantime.

“I’m sure you will, babe.” - you laughed

Tyson and Miles walked out from behind me and Joe squatted down to hug his boys, though Tyson complained that Joe’s shoulder pads made the hug “uncwumfy”.

Once they were done hugging their dad, Joe stood back up and placed a kiss on my cheek. He placed a big hand on the center of my small bump and grinned at me.

“I don't want to keep you from the team too long, I'll see you later.” - you

“One, my family is way more important than football, and two you better be seeing me later because I'm your ride home.” - Joe

“You're a dork, Joe. I love you though.” - you

Joe leaned down to kiss me, faint sounds of the team inside the locker room getting hyped, and the twins gagging watching their parents kiss could be heard, but the only thing that I could pay attention to was my husband's soft lips.

“I love you too.” - Joe pecked your forehead when he pulled away

I watched him turn in the direction of the door and I took this as an opportunity to smack him on the butt since the twins were occupied looking at the artwork on the walls.

“Go win this game, Tiger.” - you winked

Joe chuckled loudly and rolled his eyes before stepping into the locker room. My smile never left my face as I watched him walk over to Zac, who is a proud girl dad himself, patted him on the back.

——

Walking back to the box with my boys had my heart flourishing like never before. They continuously asked questions about their baby sister and for once it felt like nothing could ruin my mood, not even the fact I was going to have smile lines by 40.

————————————————————————-

Authors note: Guys I lost my streak… so this is technically the 6th day of Christmas. Day 5 coming out later today maybe. 😊😉

Request for this fic; loosely based off of…

Hope you enjoyed! ❤️

#joe burrow #bengals #joe burrow imagine #joe burrow x reader #joey b #cincinnati bengals #joe burrow fan fic #joe burrow fluff

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moonflowerdamie · 10 months

Text

everyone thinks that they know us (but they know nothing)

Word Count: 2.7k

Title from 'Dress' by Taylor Swift.

Based on a request from @idkwhatnameuselol :)

*****

3:28 blinks back at you from the clock on your bedside table as you turn to check it for what must be the hundredth time. The numbers, red and unassuming, may as well be laser beams with how they send a pang of anxious pain through your head. You’ve got to be up in less than 5 hours. Brilliant.

You are, typically, an overthinker. So this, the situation you find yourself in now—mind whirring, brain unable to shut down—is not uncharacteristic in the slightest. It’s almost laughable that you thought you’d be getting a full 8 hours tonight, what with the stunt you’re planning to pull tomorrow—well, today, actually. The correction makes you wince.

Rolling onto your back, you stare up at the ceiling in the dark. By this point, you’ve practically given up on getting any sleep; a stupid move, given the very important game you’re to be a part of in less than 10 hours. But sleep seems a distant dream, and you’re not going to frustrate yourself with another futile attempt. Better to be calm and awake, rather than irritated and grumpy.

You’re pretty set on just waiting the night out when you feel her turn over beside you, an arm slung over your waist, her fingers curling protectively over your hip.

“Why are you still awake?”

Alessia’s voice is hoarse from sleep, her eyes bleary and hair a mess, and you can’t help but fall a little bit more in love with her at the sight.

“Just thinking.” You whisper back, hoping you sound reassuring and not like you’ve just spent the last 4 hours tossing and turning, mulling over the next day. You can tell you’ve failed when her brows furrow and she shuffles closer.

“About tomorrow?” You nod, and lift your hand to card your fingers through her hair. Alessia sighs happily and leans into your touch, but concern remains written in her features.

“It’s going to be a tough game, we know that; I mean it’s a semi-final so of course—”

“Not that,” you cut her off gently, “not the game itself.”

Realisation darkens Alessia’s eyes and her face softens even more. Wordlessly, she extends her arms to you. You smile tiredly, nudging your way into her grasp until your face is buried in her neck, arms wound around her waist, her hands rubbing soothing patterns into your back. You breathe in deep, and the familiar scent of her calms you somewhat. Her pulse flutters against your lips, brushing against her throat, and you kiss the spot tenderly.

The two of you lie in silence for a moment, enjoying the peace you always find in each other’s embrace. Alessia presses kisses soft as raindrops to your head, and you feel drowsiness start to seep into your bones.

She speaks after a while, moving one hand up to scratch gently at your scalp, knowing it always helps you drift off.

“It’s going to be ok, you know. It’s scary now, and it’ll be scary tomorrow, but we’re doing it together.” She presses another kiss to your head. “And once it’s done, it’s done. No more hiding.”

You know she’s right; she always is (though you’ll never tell her that), so you nod against her and snuggle in even closer. Before you know it, your eyes are closing, your body going slack.

The last thing you hear before you succumb to sleep is Alessia’s voice, honey-sweet and quiet, telling you she loves you. You smile faintly, and drift away.

*****

The morning comes, and with it your anxiety.

You’re a ball of nervous energy through your morning routine, through breakfast, all the way to the stadium. The other girls sense it and leave you to it—they probably think you’re stressed about the game—something you’re very thankful for as you bite at your nails entering the changing room at Wembley.

You take your sweet time getting ready, pulling your kit on and fixing your hair slowly and methodically. One by one, the other Lionesses leave the room and head out to warm up, until it’s just you and Alessia left.

Pulling the shirt out of your kit bag feels monumental, and as you stare at the name printed on the back, you feel the strangest mixture of exhilaration, nerves, nausea and pride.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Alessia checks one final time, placing a hand on your knee. Her eyes are searching, and you know that if you were to back out now, there would be no judgement from her. The thought comforts you, steels you. You look back at the name above your number and smile. This is it.

You nod, grinning at her. A matching smile spills across her beautiful face as she leans in and kisses your temple.

“Let’s do this then.”

*****

Your teammates don’t notice right away, most of them too focussed on readying themselves for the match ahead, too lost in their own preparations to register the changed name on your back.

It’s something of a relief, as it allows you to get into the headspace you need to be in for the semi-final—Sweden aren’t going to be an easily beaten opponent, so you need to be at your best.

Keira is the first to clock: you see confusion spread across her face as you turn away from her to grab some cones for a passing drill, and your heart leaps into your throat. She says nothing though, merely shakes her head a little and gets on with passing, but the seed is sown.

As kick-off approaches, you see more and more of your teammates starting to notice. Leah, stoic as ever, stares blankly at the back of your shirt for a good few seconds before turning away to stretch. Rachel, hardly as subtle, spots the name and nudges Millie, the both of them looking on with scrunched up expressions, like they can’t quite figure it out.

It’s Georgia who finally speaks up, pointing it out as the two of you practise one-two’s.

“Why are you wearing Alessia’s shirt?” She asks, loud enough for said woman to hear. Alessia turns to face you guys from where she was shooting against Mary. You smile, hoping your fear doesn’t show in your face, heart racing.

“I’m not.”

“Then why does it have ‘Russo’ on the back?” Georgia questions, utterly baffled.

Because, here’s the thing: you’re not wearing Alessia’s shirt. It’s yours. As is the name on the back of it—your name, and your wife’s.

Your wife. You still can’t quite believe it.

The two of you have been together for almost 4 years now, and you got married last October. In secret. Nobody except your families know about the wedding. Nobody, not even your teammates, even knew you were dating. You’d hidden the relationship all this time.

There are a plethora of reasons why you and Alessia kept the relationship a secret. First of all, neither of you are publicly out as queer, and way back when the two of you started out, neither of you were ready. Coming out to family and friends is hard enough, but to the whole world? It had seemed impossible.

A million other worries and concerns and preferences had helped you make the decision to keep quiet about your love to the general public, but also to your teams, both club-level and internationally. It’s not that you don’t trust the girls you work and play with—that’s not it at all—but a secret relationship is a private relationship, and god knows the two of you needed that.

You’re surrounded by these girls almost every day, and it’s almost impossible to keep things to yourself. This is your first major tournament with the Lionesses, but already you know almost too much about your teammates, and vice versa.

What you have with Alessia, you felt was nobody’s business. It’s quiet and peaceful, and more than anything, it’s yours and yours alone. So you kept it that way.

But now, married and settled, you both decided it was time to let the team, and the world, know: Alessia is yours and you are hers, happily and forever.

Georgia is still waiting on an answer as you reflect on all of this, and so Alessia steps in.

“It has Russo on the back because that’s her name.” She says cheerily, before skipping off to grab some water.

Georgia looks puzzled as you suck in a breath and wait for the penny to drop.

It doesn’t.

“Weird.” She scoffs, and carries on with the drill, saying nothing more on the subject.

You can’t tell if you’re relieved or not.

*****

The game goes well, with you beating Sweden and gaining a spot in the Euro’s final. It’s exhilarating and joyful and when your wife jumps into your arms after the final whistle blows, you think that you could die happy after today.

As the roar of victory dies down and fans begin to exit the stadium, you and Alessia head over to her family, standing by the railing. Yours couldn’t attend the match, but Alessia’s parents and siblings feel like home all the same.

“Oh, ragazze, well done! I’m so proud of you both!” Alessia’s mother says, clutching both you and your wife to her in a tight hug. You grin, still high on the emotions of the game, and squeeze her back before you pull away. Alessia’s arm winds around your waist as you stand there and chat to her family, and from the corner of your eye you can see Keira and Lucy watching the two of you.

After the game, Alessia’s family take you both out to dinner to celebrate. It’s a great night, it always is with the Russo’s, and you’re so happy that you don’t notice half the team’s stares when you walk back into the hotel later that evening, Alessia’s hand in yours.

*****

The confrontation comes the next day after breakfast.

It’s rest day, but Sarina had asked the team to stay together, playing games and watching movies as a way to bond a little more before the final, so all of you file into the games room after you eat.

You manage to get through Twister, Jenga and half of a Star Wars movie before it finally happens.

“Right.” The movie is paused, Lucy holding the remote and turning to fix you and Alessia with a firm stare. You swallow hard, eyes darting about the room.

“Luce, put the film back on, we—” Millie whines, but Lucy cuts her off.

“I will. After those two tell us what the hell is going on.”

Every eye in the room turns to you and Alessia, following Lucy’s accusing gaze. It’s dark in the games room, all the lights off and curtains drawn for the film, but you can still see the faces of your teammates, the way their eyes shine with curiosity.

“What do you—” You start, innocence coating your tone, but Lucy stops you.

“You know exactly what I mean. Wearing a shirt with Alessia’s name on, the both of you going for dinner with her family last night. And don’t think I can’t see that hickey Less, you’re not subtle.”

A blush heats your face as your wife shifts next to you, her hand coming up to rub at the mark you’d left just above her collarbone—perhaps you got a little carried away last night.

(Alessia wasn’t complaining when you’d given her it but that’s not the point.)

“So come on, out with it.”

Lucy’s questioning seems to start the others off as well, and soon the room is a cacophony of voices asking you what was happening and what yesterday was all about. And you wanted this, you know you did; wanted the girls to know about you and Alessia, but here, now, with everyone looking at you and asking all the big questions, you’re starting to panic a little.

Your mouth goes dry, hands turning clammy as you struggle to stay calm. Anxiety is clutching at your heart and your blood rushes in your ears.

Alessia clocks, seeing the panic so clearly displayed in your body language, and, in what was a noble attempt to help you out, shuts the whole room up.

“Guys, would you please leave my wife alone.”

Silence. Complete silence follows Alessia’s words. Every mouth in the room hangs open as the girls process what she’s just said.

And then—

“Wife?!”

“Wait, you and Y/N are together?”

“You’re married?! Since when?”

“What the absolute fuck?!”

The room explodes with noise, questions and incredulity spilling out and filling the air. You’re not sure who’s asking what, shaky and somewhat nauseous. Beside you, Alessia slides her fingers between yours and squeezes three times. I love you.

It takes a while for the girls to calm down, but when they do, your wife takes the lead, answering all their questions patiently whilst you bite your lip and watch the room for reactions.

After the shock of it, everybody seems happy for you. There are a few congratulatory remarks made, and a couple of teasing comments, mostly from Millie and Mary.

(“Oh, so that’s why they always room together at camp!”

“Shut up, Mearps.”)

In fact, the only person who doesn’t seem delighted for the two of you is Ella. She sits there, brows drawn together, jaw clenched. It makes your stomach turn over with nerves—she’s Alessia’s best friend, and you desperately want her approval. You don’t know why she seems so upset, but it’s starting to make bile rise in your throat.

She explains her dismay before too long.

“Less, you didn’t tell me?”

And her voice is hurt, small. Alessia turns to her. You see her smile drop when she meets Ella’s eyes.

“El, we didn’t tell anyone, only our families.” She speaks softly, and you can tell she feels guilty. You do too. Ella and Alessia are like sisters, and it must hurt to realise Alessia kept such a big secret from her, even if it was for a good reason.

“But I’m your best mate.” There’s a hint of betrayal in her tone, and you see pain flash over Alessia’s face.

The rest of the room has gone silent as the two speak, watching with bated breath. You squeeze Alessia’s hand in a show of silent support.

“I’m sorry, El, I really am. We wanted to keep it private. It was nothing you guys did or didn’t do, we just—we just wanted to be us, just us, for a little while.”

Ella is silent for a moment, gears evidently turning. You bite your lip even harder, nearly drawing blood as you wait for either a shouting match or forgiveness.

“So, nobody knew except your families? Nobody?”

“Nobody.” Alessia confirms. “And if we had decided to tell people back when we started dating, you’d have been the first to know, I promise.”

This seems to soften her, and Ella chuckles quietly. Hope blooms in your chest.

“I s’pose being a secret made sneaking around under Sarina’s nose a lot easier.”

The whole room laughs at that, and the tension that had been building unravels. Something tight loosens in your body and you slump backwards a little bit as Alessia and Ella begin bantering like they usually do.

As the room settles once more, and Lucy reaches for the remote to resume the film, Alessia leans into your side. Her head comes to rest on your shoulder, hand winding around your arm. You smile, heart jumping. The noise from the TV filters back into the room, providing enough cover for you to press a kiss to Alessia’s hair and whisper a soft ‘I love you’.

“I love you too, Mrs Russo.” She murmurs back, and you chuckle.

The film continues with Alessia snuggled into you. You look around at your friends, see them smiling and happy, see that the world hasn’t ended like you used to think it would if you stopped hiding, and you think, this. This is it. This is right.

You don’t stop smiling for the rest of the day.

*****

A/N: Ok so my first x reader fic is done! I hope you guys liked it, it was fun to write and I love me some Lessi so I'm glad to be putting more works out there for her!

#alessia russo x reader #alessia russo #x reader #woso one shot #woso x reader #woso imagine #fluff #lionesses #engwnt

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im-sleepdeprived · 18 days

Text

Seasonal • Pt. 2

pairing: peter parker x reader

summary: inspired by the taylor swift song ‘peter’ where you and peter discover just how hard it is to hold on to something from your past, no mater how much you love each other

a/n: things are progressing :)) right now im picturing this series as 5 parts, also i’ve been getting tons of requests and TRUSTTTT that as soon as this series is over I’ll be working on those🫡

warnings: none really, some (lots) angst, some pining, there are some time skips both forward and backwards and I don’t have them marked (sorry !) but theyre pretty easy to spot imo, healthy family relationships :(

masterlist, read part 1 here

You blew out a breath as you set down the last box. “Ok, I think we’re done sweetie,” said your dad from his spot across the room.

You collapsed on the bed, exhausted from hauling boxes into your new dorm. The place you’ll be living for the next school year. “Your mom’s already in the car, said she couldn’t handle this part.”

You sat up and smiled. “Yeah, I don’t know if I can either.”

Your dad chuckled. “Come here kiddo.” You stood up and walked over, your dad pulling you into a warm embrace. “If you need anything, just let us know, we’ll be here faster than you can blink.”

“I’ll be okay,” you whispered.

“And…try to make friends honey. It’s a new place, new people. Get out there, okay? Promise me you won’t just lock yourself in here all the time.”

“I promise,” you pulled away. “I actually have an orientation to get to in about an hour, I’m sure I’ll meet tons of people there.”

“I love you,” he squeezed your shoulders for emphasis. “I know this was hard for you, breakups-”

“Dad I promise I’m fine.” You didn’t want to talk about this at all, let alone with your father.

He stared at you for a while before seemingly giving up. Your dad let out a sigh, “Fine. But if you decide this isn’t for you, if you think college completely sucks I’ll come pick you up in a heartbeat.”

You smiled and leaned over to press a kiss to his cheek. “Thanks, Dad. Tell Mom I love her.”

“Will do kid,” he ruffled your hair. “Now let me get outta here before I start sobbing.”

You laughed and gave him one last hug before waving him off. You fell onto your bed again and let out a sigh. Across the room stood another bed, empty. For now. You hadn’t met your roommate, and you didn’t really want to. You weren’t in the mood for introductions and small talk. You weren’t even sure if you were up for going to that orientation you’d told your dad about, it was recommended, not mandatory.

There was only one person you wanted to talk to, whose voice you craved to hear. The problem was, it was the one person you couldn’t call.

Columbia definitely wasn’t going how you thought it would.

Your first week flew by, you’d met all of your professors and for the most part, they were all pretty nice. You’d even made some friends; a girl named Marissa and another one named Lola. You’d met them both at the freshman orientation andthey were really sweet. You ended up going after your dad had sent you a little reminder (you wondered if he had known you were lying) and you figured it couldn’t hurt. They were nice enough people and it was good to get to know your peers. Your roommate, Lindsay, had come in on your second day, but apparently, she was dating some dude who owned an apartment right off campus and she spent most of her time there.

Clubs and all different frats and sororities were camping out in little booths all around campus trying to get new members. Seeing the photography club’s booth sent a sharp jab of pain through your heart every time. It was even worse when you realized one of the biggest photography classes was in the building right next to the English building, which is where most of your classes would be taking place. For your whole time there.

It was one day a couple of weeks into your classes, you were exiting a class where you been debating whether it was better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all. Some students were talking privately, but the teacher had overheard them and made it a class discussion, exclaiming that she thought it was 'a trendy enough subject to raise engagement and break the ice’.

Then as you stepped out of the doors to your class, a flyer flew in from beside you and landed right at your feet. When you picked it up you realized it was a flyer for the annual photography competition. It was actually a pretty big thing around here and you’d heard a few students talking about it.

You didn’t usually believe in signs but these seemed pretty clear.

Without overthinking it, you pulled out your phone.

hey

saw something abt photography and thought of you lol. how are you hows school so far ?

You bit your lip in anticipation. You weren’t expecting him to reply right away but…you were nervous he might not have even replied at all.

He was the one who’d said maybe no contact for a while might help, but he’d also said you could call him whenever, and he’d be there for you, no matter what.

i was just thinking about you

The words made your heart skip a beat as you saw them sprawled across your screen.

school’s great, still trying to get the hang of things but it’s gotten easier

my roommate’s kinda boring, but maybe that’s for the best. he could be a crazy person

You laughed until another message showed up on your screen.

how’s columbia? is it everything you dreamed it would be?

no of course not. we were supposed to go here together, we were supposed to BE together. i can’t go anywhere without thinking of you and all i want to do is call you and hear your voice and for things to be okay between us again.

But you couldn’t send that.

yeah ! it’s great but like you said, lots of adjusting haha

are you happy?

And you weren’t sure what it was exactly, but something about that text made you tear up. Were you happy? The answer should’ve been an automatic yes, you’d gotten into your dream school after stressing all year about it, you had got the classes you wanted, and everything was seemingly fine. Great even. But you couldn’t shake the hollow emptiness you’d been carrying since graduation.

You’d gotten what you’d wanted, yes. It just wasn’t how you’d imagined it.

yeah i am :)

glad to hear it ace

look ive got to go i have a class starting. talk to you soon

bye pete

bye

It wasn’t normal. At least, it wasn’t your normal and you hated it. But maybe now, it was.

Your heart raced when you saw the notification. You were so close to tapping it, reading the whole thing but you held back. Columbia’s acceptance emails went out today and you and Peter were supposed to open yours together.

You were waiting for him on the fire escape bouncing your leg up and down anxiously. Checking your phone for the time again, you decided you’d just call him.

“Hey Ace,” you heard his voice through the speaker, along with an array of other noises.

“You’re out. Are you out? It’s okay, we can talk later.” You replied quickly.

Peter chuckled on the other end. “No, it’s fine. I’m just swinging.”

You frowned. “I thought we agreed, no swinging and talking. You get too distracted Petey.”

“No you agreed Ace, I just politely listened.” You could hear the smirk in his voice.

“Peter,” you said in a warning tone.

“Sorry, sorry.” He laughed. “I’m on my way.”

“Oh?”

“Duh. I know what today is, I got my notification. I’m almost there.”

“Have you checked?”

“‘Course not Ace,” he chuckled. “Have you?”

“No, no way, of course not.”

“Great, I’ll be there in five.”

“Okay, I’ll see you then,” you pulled the phone away to hang up and you could hear his protesting. Quickly, you yelled into the speaker, “Watch where you’re swinging babe!” And you hit the red button.

He always said he preferred swinging on call with you, but there’d been too many close calls of him almost swinging into a building or in front of a car for you to be okay with it.

Sure enough, in almost exactly five minutes Peter landed on your fire escape, feet on the ground, perfectly contact.

“Good, you're here.” You rushed over and pulled him into a hug, kissing his cheek as he swiped his mask off.

He pressed a kiss to the top of your head, “Thank you for waiting Ace, I’m sure it must’ve driven you crazy.”

“No, I’m good.” You said too quickly to sound true.

He laughed. “Okay,” he pulled away and gripped your shoulders. He shook you slightly and grinned. “Let’s do this!”

You sit down on the floor cross-legged and unlock your phone. Peter followed suit as you stared at him. You both pulled up your applications, ready to see the change in your status.

Accepted or denied.

A new door to your future, either opened or slammed in your face.

“Ready?” He asked you gently.

“Yeah, are you?”

He nodded. “Okay on the count of three. One. Two. Three.”

You clicked. You almost didn’t want to read and you were sure if Peter weren’t there you would’ve stalled a little more, but the words were in front of you now.

Dear Y/N Y/L/N,

Congratulations! It is a pleasure for me to inform you that you have been accepted for admission to Columbia College.The faculty and staff would like to commend you on your past accomplishments, which formed the basis of our admission decision in a highly competitive pool of applicants. We look forward to working with you in your future academic endeavors. Please visit the Welcome to Columbia website at:

You stopped reading. Your mouth hung open and you couldn’t believe it. You kept rereading that first sentence over and over as if it would morph before your eyes and call you out for believing it in the first place.

You looked up. Peter had a similarly awestruck expression on his face as he met your eyes.

“What does yours say?”

He laughed. “Nuh-uh. I asked first Ace.”

Silently, you hand him your phone, letting him see for himself because you can't even form the words. You got in.

It didn’t take him long, probably only reading the first few words before he put the phone down and pulled you into a tight hug.

“I’m so proud of you Ace,” he whispered. “See? I told you you’d get in.”

You squeezed him. “I love you so much Petey, but come on you need to show me yours, s’only fair.”

“Don’t wanna,” he mumbled into your hair.

Your brows furrowed. Why wouldn’t he want to show you? It would only make you happier to read his acceptance letter as well. You pulled away and reached for his phone on the floor. Peter didn’t stop you.

Dear Peter Parker,

The Committee on Admissions has carefully reviewed your application to Columbia University, and we are sorry to inform you that we cannot offer you a place in—

You couldn’t believe it. You read it over and over and over again. Never once in a million years did you think Peter wouldn’t get in. The boy was a fucking genius and you couldn’t believe they would reject him.

“Ace it’s not that big of a deal, honestly-”

“What? Of course it is,” you looked up at him, anger coursing through your veins. “They’re fucking idiots. They’re pieces of shit and this,” you held up his phone, “this is the biggest load of bullshit I’ve ever seen.”

He cracked a small smile. “Actually, that’s my phone. With you on the lock screen mind you.”

You weren’t feeling it. “Peter, they suck.”

“Obviously not if they accepted you.”

“Nuh-uh,” you shook your head quickly. “I don’t wanna go.”

“What?”

“No,” you shook your head some more. “I don’t trust people with such terrible judgment to lead me into my ‘future academic endeavors’. I don’t trust those little shits at all.”

“Ace come on, you don’t mean that.” He gave you a look.

“No, I totally do. Actually, I might just-”

He cut you off, leaning in and pressing a kiss to your mouth. But just as soon as it’d begun, it was over. Peter leaned back, “That always works whenever you’re too worked up.”

“Peter,” you said, and your voice sounded defeated.

“Ace listen to me,” he cupped your face and stared straight into your eyes. “You are going to go to that school, and you’re gonna love it. There is absolutely no way I’m running this for you.”

“You’ll ruin it by not being there,” you mumbled.

“No, I won’t. Because you’re going to be too busy blowing everyone's mind and being the absolute best version of yourself that you can be.”

You laughed softly but it held no humor in it. “But we were supposed to go together.”

“But that shouldn’t stop you from enjoying it without me. So what if I didn’t get in? I applied to other schools, greatschools. And if I really feel like it, I can always transfer, it’s easier that way isn’t it?”

“And what about us?” You bit the inside of your cheek anxiously.

“Nothing’s gonna happen to us Ace,” he smooshed your face making you laugh. “Just because we aren’t going to the same school doesn’t mean we have to break up.”

It felt like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders. You weren’t aware of just how terrified you’d been for the future of your relationship until he’d said that. You know people had little to no faith in high school relationships but…something was different about you and Peter. You were sure of it. You’d get through this.

You made your way through the halls. You were in an old building, one of the campus’ firsts, and you were on your way to the newsroom. Today was your first official day and to say you were nervous was an understatement. You knew how serious this was, they were the second-oldest college daily paper in the country, and they didn’t just let anyone onto their team. You were ready to prove yourself and prove that you’d be a great addition to the news staff.

Also, you needed something that would get you to stop thinking about Peter. You’d talked a few more times after that first week, and it was always you who initiated your chats. They never went past simple hey’s and how are you’s and then one of you (usually Peter) had to run off. It was so strange for you to think that once you two could’ve talked about nothing and everything for hours and now you could barely get past simple greetings.

You stopped in front of a door, checked the number beside it to make sure you had the right one and took a deep breath before turning the handle.

You heard all the commotion before you saw it, confirming your suspicions that this was the newsroom. Before you, the room was filled with desks, each one supporting its own computer and keyboard, most of them filled. Some desks were neat and tidy, their chairs empty, looking as if they hadn’t been touched. Others were the complete opposite, you couldn’t see the surface of them, they were covered in stacks and stacks of papers, loose pencil shavings, and various other items.

There was a whiteboard on the same side of the wall as the door and it was almost completely covered in lists, locations, and time stops for certain activities. There were copies of different editions of the paper framed and hanging on the wall. You smiled, this was perfect.

Suddenly, you felt a tap on your shoulder. You turned around and came face to face with a guy who looked to be a couple of years older than you. He had cropped black hair and stubble covering the entire bottom half of his face.

“First day, right?” He asked you.

You nodded quickly and offered him your hand. “Y/N Y/L/N.”

He accepted it and nodded. “Yeah, I remember you Y/L/N, your try-out piece was good. Really good.”

Pride bloomed in your chest and you gave him a smile. “Thanks. Where do you want me?” You gestured at the room.

He narrowed his eyes slightly before giving you the smallest of smiles, a little quirk on the sides of his lips. “Straight to business, I like that. Think we’re gonna get along pretty well Y/L/N, come on.” He started walking you through the room and introducing everyone and their roles. “I’m Brandon, the editor, over there we’ve got our photographers, that girl,” he pointed to a redhead working at her desk, “Alyssa, she’s editor-in-chief. Helps with things I can’t get around to and when there’s an overload of articles, like now.

“It’s not usually this crowded in here, usually the only people always in here are the writers but, you know, start of the school year,” he gestured vaguely, “lots of new editions, things to be sorted.” He stopped in front of one of the desks that looked like it hadn’t been touched. “This is your place. Actually, we already have something for you to work on.”

You sat in your chair and got adjusted. “Great! Anything.”

He smirked. “We need someone to cover the new bathrooms opening near Kent Hall. Good luck,” he tapped your desk before heading off to deal with other things.

You stared for a bit, when you’d said anything that wasn’t really what you meant, but you figured you had to start somewhere.

“Don’t worry,” a voice spoke from beside you and you turned towards him. “They do that to all the newbies, it’s like a right of passage or something. Write the shitty articles for the first few months, prove your worth, or some bullshit like that.” He rolled his eyes and gave you a small. Holding out his hand he said, “James Blake, nice to meet you.”

You returned his smile and shook his hand, “Y/N Y/L/N, nice to meet you too James.”

He grinned. James was blonde, he had a dazzling smile, and striking green eyes. Honestly, he looked more fit for a magazine cover, not a newsroom. “Well Y/N, I was in your shoes last year. It gets better,” he sent you a wink.

You laughed, “Actually, I don’t mind. I’m just happy to be here.”

“That’s the kinda attitude that’ll make you editor in a few years if you want it,” he clicked his tongue and leaned back in his chair.

You tried not to blush, his gaze was intense and you had a feeling he was trying to gauge what kind of reaction you’d have, though you weren’t sure why. “Right now the only thing I’m worried about are those new bathrooms near Kent.”

James laughed. “Fair enough. If you need anything, I’ll be right here. Don’t be shy to ask for help.” He winked at you again and you thanked him before turning on your computer and getting to work.

Your first day in the newsroom was mostly getting used to everything. The people were cool, you had a great time getting to know them all, and you could definitely see yourself working here for the rest of the year, even longer than you hoped. You’d written down the keynotes for your article and had planned to start working on it later that week after you walked over to Kent Hall and got a look for yourself. It was a lousy topic, sure, but that would stop you from trying your best and proving yourself.

It was true what they said, your first semester does fly by. Or at least that’s what you’d heard and now you understood. It was December now, almost winter break, and you almost couldn’t believe it.

Your first article on the Daily Spectator had gone over pretty well. It was small, practically pointless as it was shoved somewhere in the back where almost no one looks, but Brandon liked that you didn’t just half-ass it and he’d started to (gradually) give you better topics to work on. You were hoping that by the end of the year, you might get your hand on one of the campus hot topics.

You’d gone out a few times, Marissa and Lola from your first week were always inviting you out to different places andyou envied their easygoingness. You’d accepted a few times but you always went home earlier than them, you never seemed to really fit in those places.

Tonight, you were going out with a few of your friends from the newspaper. Over the past couple of months, you quickly became close with some of them, especially Alyssa. Even James, who was an okay guy, if a little cocky, but overall they were all good people.

One of your favorite things about Columbia was its campus and the fact that it was in the city. Walking around now, the snow glittered under all the lights, reminding you of the stars you and Peter used to watch together. You looked up at the empty sky and wondered if he could see any stars where he was now, if they reminded him of you.

You walked into the restaurant and took off your coat. You were wearing a simple sweater dress with a high neck and a pair of ankle boots. You spotted Alyssa sitting at a table waving you over and you smiled as you walked towards her.

“Hey everyone,” you took a seat beside Alyssa. Directly across from you, James shot you a grin.

“Hey Y/N, we’re still waiting on Nikki and Gavin,” Alyssa said. Her phone dinged and she checked it before saying, “That was her, they’ll be here in 5.”

Conversations flowed around the table and soon, Nikki and Gavin arrived. Everyone was laughing and having a great time and when the waiter arrived to take your orders, it took you a second to notice.

“Let me guess your order,” James leaned over the table with a small smile as the waitress started going around the table.

You grinned. “Go ahead.”

“Hmm…” he opened up the menu in front of him and pointed to a listing of words. “Shrimp?”

Laughing, you shook your head. “No.”

“Okay, okay. Are you vegan? Any food allergies I should know about?” He wondered.

“I’m getting the Fettucini Alfredo, what about you?” The way he gasped you thought you’d asked him to take his pants off right then and there.

He shook his head, “I can’t believe you ruined the game. I was supposed to guess Y/N.”

You winced. “Sorry.”

“It’s alright, have you ever tried their steak?” He gave you one of his infamous smiles, “It’s great.”

“No actually, I haven’t been here before.”

“Really? Alright wait,” he held up a hand and turned his head. You hadn’t even realized the waitress had gotten to you. “I’ll have the ribeye, medium rare. And same for her,” he pointed towards you.

You stared as the waitress turned toward you. “Any sides?”

“Um, the seasoned fries with a cherry coke please.” You weren’t really sure what to order anymore, James had just completely thrown you off.

When the waitress finished up and walked away to hand your orders in, James turned toward you again. “You’re gonna love it, you’ll see.”

Jokes were shared around the whole table throughout the whole dinner and you were glad you got to have a night like this before finals week. James kept asking what you thought about the steak and while you didn’t hate it, you didn’t love it either. It wasn’t what you had wanted. But you didn’t want to hurt his feelings so you smiled and told him it was great.

By the end of the night, you were stuffed and ready to go home. “You sure you don’t wanna join? Nikki said she hooked up with one of the security guards once and she thinks she could get us into the VIP section.” You had just finished paying for your food and Alyssa was currently trying to convince you to head over to some club with them. And you might’ve been tempted if your phone hadn’t just buzzed in your hands. When you looked down you saw that it was a message. From Peter.

Your heart fluttered in your chest. He texted you.

“Sorry Lyss, I’m not up for it,” you made a face, “I’m pretty sure I’m about to start my period and I’m feeling a little off.” It wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t the complete truth.

She nodded in understanding. She pulled you in for a hug, “Alright, well if you need anything, let me know. And if you change your mind, the address was sent in the group chat.”

You smiled at her when you pulled away. Alyssa had the sweetest soul of anyone you’d met and you were glad to call her a friend. “I will thank you, and that goes for you too. If you need a ride or anything, let me know and I’ll come pick you up. And turn on your location.”

“Already done,” she grinned. You returned the grin and said your last goodbyes to everyone before making your way to the door, you were itching to step outside and open your phone. But instead, a hand gripped your shoulder. You turned around to see James smirking as he looked at you.

“Leaving so soon?” He asked.

You nodded, “Not really up for clubbing tonight, but you guys have fun!” You made to pull away but he held you back.

“You sure,” he furrowed his brows, “it’s not that late. If you come, you don’t even have to stay long.”

Smiling, you nodded again. “Yeah, I’m sure. Thanks for asking though.”

“Anytime,” he shot you another grin but…it wasn’t quite right. He still looked handsome as ever, sure, but if you didn’t know any better you’d think he looked a little disappointed. “Well, have a good night Y/N.”

“You too James, bye.” You waved at him and walked out the door without looking back. As soon as you were out the door, your phone was opened and in your messages app, opening you and Peter’s chat.

hey ace, how’ve you been?

hey pete <3 i’ve been good, just finished dinner with some friends. what about you ?

that’s nice I hope you had a good time.

i’m good thanks.

actually i wanted to ask what your plans for winter break are

nothing actually, you ?

i’m coming back home and i was wondering if i could see you

Your heart almost stopped. He wanted to see you.

You tried not to get your hopes up, it probably meant nothing. Obviously, you were still friends, or friendly, and maybe he just wanted to catch up. You could only share so much over text. Or maybe….maybe he’s been missing you just as much as you’ve been missing him and he’s realized all this was a big dumb mistake.

Maybe you were getting your hopes up.

i’d love that

when do you get here ?

You two stayed texting back and forth your whole walk home. He sent you a picture of his ticket and told you he and May would love to have you over the next day. You couldn’t fight the giddy smile that took over your face. You were ecstatic he reached out to you and you realized your texts together had probably been off because he was nervous. You knew how anxious he could get sometimes, and you hoped you could resolve that when you saw each other.

You settled in your dorm that night with your heart full and your face lit up. You hadn’t felt this overjoyed in a long time. You wondered what made him bite the bullet and ask, but you could ask him that when you see him. God, you were gonnasee him. This was all you’d been wanting since the summer and now the opportunity just fell into your lap.

You sat on your bed and fell asleep staring out the window with a smile on your face.

Graduation was right around the corner. The last week of school was a blur. Everyone was throwing parties, teachers were cutting you extra slack, and people who’d never hung out once in the four years they went to school together were all over each other now. It was sweet in a way. As much as you’d all complained and whined about everything, there was a sense of familiarity here, with each other, a community that was coming to an end and it was nice seeing people try to savor it while they could.

Peter had gotten into Duke. You were beyond excited and proud of him and you knew he was excited as well. But you couldn’t help the tiniest part of your brain that selfishly wondered what that meant for you. And honestly, you were scared to ask.

Peter hadn’t brought up anything about your relationship changing or anything else of the sort, so you thought he’d come to the same conclusion you had; you were going to try to do long distance.

Sure, it might be hard but honestly, it was better for you than the alternative, which was ending things. You would definitely choose long-distance over that. So you tried not to worry too much, he was probably thinking exactly like you.

You were sat in a booth at an ice cream parlor with MJ and Ned sitting across from you, and Peter beside you, arm slung over your shoulder. He’d been acting a little weird lately and you hoped this would help cheer him up, it was probably all those end-of-the-year jitters. You were all laughing together, going over all your (least) favorite memories from school.

“Who remembers when Flash brought all those stink sprays to school?” Peter said.

“Oh my god,” Ned started in his seat. “Some kid tripped over his backpack in fifth period and set them all off! The whole class smelled so bad they made us evacuate!”

Everyone cracked up but Ned wasn’t having it. He shook his head quickly, brows furrowed in confusion. “Why are you laughing? It’s not funny! I smelled so bad my mom wouldn’t let me in the house, she made me rinse with the hose in our front yard!”

That just made you all laugh even harder. “Oh my god,” you wheezed out. “I can’t breathe.”

MJ reached across the table and grabbed your hand. Looking you dead in the face with a serious expression she said, “Breathe girl.”

The whole table roared with laughter again. “Why did he have all those bottles of stink spray anyway?” wondered MJ.

“Knowing Flash he probably thought it was cologne,” grumbled Peter, making you laugh again.

Once you’d quieted down Ned leaned back in his spot and sighed. “I’m really gonna miss this.”

You looked around, trying to fully take in this moment. You had no doubt you would all manage to stay in touch but when was the next time you would all be hanging out like this? MJ was headed to Sarah Lawrence, Ned was going to MIT, you (of course) were going to Columbia, and Peter was going to Duke. Five hundred miles away from where you were going to be. 8 hours 27 minutes and 36 seconds.

Sure in the grand scheme of things, you were all still relatively close to each other but…you’d have separate lives. For so long your lives were so intertwined with each other’s and now, you’d have to fight to keep that connection otherwiseyou’d lose it. You reached under the table and grabbed Peter’s free hand, intertwining his fingers with yours. You would fight.

Peter squeezed your hand and you leaned in closer to him. “I’m gonna miss it too,” he said in a soft voice.

“Not me, I can’t fucking wait to get out of there. You guys keep talking though.” MJ said straight-faced making you giggle. You were thankful for her brutal honesty cause you were pretty sure if the conversation kept going in the other direction, it would end with you crying, and you didn’t want that.

The group of you finished your ice cream while talking, got even more ice cream, talked some more, and suddenly you could see the sun setting outside.

“Holy fuck,” you muttered, shoveling a spoon of double chocolate chip into your mouth. “I really thought we’ve only been here for five minutes.”

“Well, now we know what you need to work on before college, Y/N. Your time awareness, we’ve been here for hours.” MJ smirked.

You all laughed except Peter, who squeezed your shoulder and frowned. “She doesn’t need to work on anything, she’sperfect.”

You smiled and leaned over to kiss his cheek, “Thank you, Petey.”

He grinned cheekily at you, “Anytime, Ace.”

Mj rolled her eyes and cut you off with a loud groan. “Oh. My. God. We get it, you are disgustingly in love.” But you didn’t miss the small smile gracing her face.

“You’ll live,” you deadpanned.

She grumbled something you couldn’t make out but before you could ask her what it was, Ned’s phone started ringing. He picked it up and answered.

“Hey mom…already? But…” his voice quieted down. “Ok, ok I’m sorry. Yes, ma’am. Bye.”

He hung up and you were all quiet for a moment before he said, “I changed my mind, I’m so ready for college.”

He dropped his head into his hands, grumbling about something like it’s not funny! while you all laughed. Finally, he stood up. “I actually really do have to go though.”

You all stood up as well, saying your goodbyes. “Yeah I think we should get going too, what do you think?” Peter asked you.

You nodded as you pulled away from your hug with Ned. “I still need to pick up my cap and gown from the dry cleaners.”

Ned nodded, “I got mine earlier today.” You high-fived him and he walked over to Peter and you watched as they did their complicated handshake. They’d claimed otherwise when you’d said exactly that, stating it was just advanced, which you’d said was just geek for complicated.

You snorted as they did their little finger guns. “Dorks,” you muttered. But you loved it.

“You can say that again,” MJ agreed, and you knew she loved it too. Staring at her for a few seconds, you launched at her with your arms open and pulled her into a tight hug. She tensed up right away. “I know of your aversion to physical touch, but right now I don’t care,” you murmured, “you’re my best friend and I love you.”

To your surprise, she relaxed into your hold and even hugged you back. “I know I give you a lot of shit,” she whispered back, “but I love you too. All of you. And I’m gonna miss you like crazy.”

“We’re definitely gonna hang out, like all the time, don’t even worry about it.” You reassured her. It was already a pain that Peter would be so far away, you weren’t going to take your closer friends for granted.

She hugged you tighter, “I’m gonna hold you to that Y/L/N.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way, Jones,” you pulled away and gave her a wicked grin which she returned. Peter approached the two of you, placing a hand on your shoulder he said, “Ned just left.”

“Bye Parker,” she held out a closed fist for him to bump with his, “you’re pretty decent. She bumps you up to Okay.” She nodded towards you which made you blow her a kiss.

Peter chuckled as he fist-bumped her. “Thanks, MJ, I actually think you’re pretty great.”

She nodded, “Yeah, whatever. Still pretty decent.” She moved past you guys and waved as she exited through the door.

Peter sighed and leaned his head over to press a kiss to your hairline. “Hey,” you started, “at least you're ‘pretty decent’ Ifeel like it could’ve been worse.”

“That’s actually exactly what I was thinking,” he said as the two of you walked out of the ice cream shop. You laughed and leaned in closer to him. “I’m not ‘pretty decent’ to you am I?”

You looked up at him seriously, “Do you think I’d be here right now if you were?”

Peter laughed and you could see those crinkles around his eyes that you loved so much. You always measured how good your jokes were by how deep they were and right now, they were pretty deep.

He squeezed your shoulder, “Whatcha staring at Ace?”

You shook your head, “Nothing, you’re just really pretty Peter Parker.”

You could see him blush out of the corner of your eye and it made you smirk. He smiled again, deep and beautiful as ever, and the crinkles were back. “I think you’re prettier Ace.”

Shaking your head, you smiled, “Not a chance pretty boy, you’ve got me beat.”

Peter’s face turned beet red at the nickname and you knew you won. “Hey,” he said in a voice that let you know he was trying to change the subject, “you what you said to MJ back there? Did you mean it?”

“Mean what?”

“Well, you told her she’s your best friend.”

“Okay…” you trailed off as you weren’t quite sure what he was trying to get at.

“Well, I thought I was your best friend.” That made you smile, but when you looked up at him again he was doing the opposite and you just wanted to kiss it away.

“Petey,” you said softly. You would’ve laughed if he hadn’t genuinely looked so dejected. “You are my best friend and so is she. It’s like how Ned is your best friend, but that doesn’t mean I’m not your best friend too. I think a person can have more than one best friend.”

He frowned and it was obvious your answer didn’t appease him. “Ned is not my best friend.”

Your mouth fell open. “What?! Of course, he is Peter, what are you talking about?”

He shook his head, “But he doesn’t outrank you. He’s my friend but you’re more.”

Now it was your turn to frown, “Outrank? This isn’t a competition sweetie. Where’s this coming from?”

He sighed and paused his walking. You leaned in and pressed a palm to the side of his face. “Peter,” you pressed in a gentle voice.

He turned his head and pressed a kiss to your palm before sighing again. “I’m sorry, that was stupid, it didn’t even make sense. It’s just…everything is changing, y’know? And I’m scared. ”

Your heart twisted. “I know Pete, it is scary. But we still have each other, this doesn’t have to change anything. I’ll always be here for you no matter what, no matter how far away you are. Plus, we still have all summer before we have to worry about that.” You gave him a small smile. Peter stared at you for a moment and the silence made you anxious. His eyes looked sad like he was already saying goodbye. Finally, he leaned in and kissed your forehead.

"Promise me no matter what, you'll remember I'll always be your friend."

Your brows furrowed but you agreed. "Of course, I promise."

He blew out a long breath and pulled you into a hug, “I love you, Ace. Always.”

“I love you too Peter.”

Today was the day.

Today was the day that the past twelve years of your life had led to. All those sleepless nights, insanely late nights, hours upon hours spent hunched over books and worksheets and essays. This is what they were for.

You had woken up early to get ready, but also because you couldn’t sleep you were too excited. You had already done your hair and makeup and were scrolling on your phone until it was time to get dressed when a message from Peter popped up on your screen.

morning ace ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

MORNING !!!!!!!

excited huh?

SUPER !!!!!

i love you

cant wait to see you

The plan was for Peter and May to come over and take photos before you all left for the actual ceremony.

I LOVE YOU MORE XOXO

literally, what are you waiting for come over right now

way ahead of you

Right after you read the text there was a tap on your window, making you jump in surprise. You rushed over and pushed it open, letting him in.

“Hey Ace,” he said, pressing a kiss to your cheek.

“That was quick,” you replied.

He sat on your bed and patted the spot next to him signaling for you to sit as well. Taking up the spot beside him, you grinned at him and leaned in to pinch his cheeks. “What’s wrong Petey? Aren’t you happy you’re graduating?”

He smiled but his eyes didn’t crinkle like they normally do. “Hey,” you pressed with a gentler voice, “sweetie is something wrong? You can tell me.”

He blew out a breath and fell back onto your sheets. “I don’t know how.”

You played on your stomach and propped yourself up on your elbows, “That’s okay, we can figure that out together,” you ran a hand through his hair, admiring the softness of his curls. You always liked it like this, and when he got it cut, he’d started to keep it a little longer than he used to because he knew you liked it.

He looked up at you and you realized how tired his eyes looked, he must’ve been spending more time on patrol lately. You made a mental note to make sure he spent the rest of the summer sleeping well.

“How did I get so lucky to have you?” He murmured and you felt your face heat up at his words.

“I don’t know,” you shrugged, “wished upon a star maybe?”

He grinned. “Maybe, because there's no way you’re not magical.”

You matched his expression as you leaned down and pecked his lips softly. When you moved to pull away his lips chased yours, refusing to let you go that simply.

Somehow, you don’t even remember how, you’d moved and suddenly you were straddling his hips and his hands cupped your ass. You moved one of your hands up to his hair, letting your fingers slightly tug at his curls, making him groan into your mouth.

You could feel his hands gently pulling you down and you obliged, grinding on him as your lips attacked each other. All of a sudden, those same hands on you were being used to flip you over and the next thing you knew, Peter was towering over you, panting, lips plump and red, face flushed, and eyes hazy.

You pulled him back down but there was a knock at your door, making you both jump. Quickly, you held up a finger to Peter’s lips, making sure he didn’t make a sound.

“Y/N honey, are you up?”

“Yes Mom!”

“Alright, well get dressed and come out for some breakfast, we’re gonna need to leave soon.”

“Okay I’ll be right out.” You waited until you heard her footsteps retreating before you moved your finger. “Sorry about that.” You whispered.

“It’s fine Ace,” he smiled and leaned down to press kisses all over your face and neck. You giggled but then remembered he came over for a reason.

Pulling him back by the hair, “Wait, Pete, what was it you wanted to tell me?”

He stared at you in shock, as if he couldn’t believe you remembered. “No um, actually, it can wait. Go eat breakfast,” he kissed right beneath your ear, “I’ll see you in a little bit.”

You grabbed him and pulled him in for one more long kiss. “I love you,” you smiled sweetly at him, “and I’m so proud of you.”

He stared at you for a moment before he grabbed both your hands in his, “I love you so much Ace, and I need you to know that please.” His expression was almost pained, as if the thought of you doubting him for even a second caused physical hurt.

“Of course I know that Pete,” you frowned slightly. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine.” He smiled. Or tried to smile, because once again those crinkles beside his eyes that you loved so much weren’t there, and you had a feeling there was something he wasn’t telling you. But you trusted him, if there wassomething that needed to be said, he would’ve said it.

“Okay,” you leaned in and kissed him, “I’ll see you later.”

“Bye Ace,” he said and walked to the window before crawling on the wall. The first time you’d seen him pull out that trick you’d told him he looked like a lizard.

Finishing getting dressed, you stepped out to have a quick breakfast so you could see Peter faster. Soon, Peter and May were in your apartment and she and your parents were all fawning over the two of you. Peter had given her his camera and she was on picture duty for the day since he would be occupied.

“Okay enough,” you said, taking off your cap and situating your hair. “It’s graduation you guys, not prom. Enough with the poses.”

“Oh, we all remember that,” Peter rolled his eyes making you smirk. The three of them had driven you guys insane with all the poses, the fussing, your dad’s jokes. And you and Peter had surely antagonized them to no end, rolling your eyes and grumbling. It was almost like being split into teams, sometimes, and you found it disgustingly cute how May got along so well with your parents and you and Peter always had each other’s backs.

“We should probably get going, we don’t want to be late,” your mom spoke up and you shot her a grateful look.

Peter looked at you. “You’re riding with me?”

Grinning, you answered, “Duh. I’ve got the playlist completely ready.”

He beamed at you and held out a hand, “Let’s go graduate Ace.” You took his hand and shot a smile over your shoulder towards the rest of your group. “See you!”

“Be safe!” You heard your Mom yell at the same time May said, “Drive carefully Pete!” But you and Peter were bounding down the stairs, your faces lit up like the 4th of July.

“Do you have the keys?” You asked him once you stepped out the door of the building. He smirked at you, “I thought we get there another way,” he flexed his wrists.

“Absolutely not, Peter.” You backed away from him, “Possibly the worst time to swing anywhere.”

He laughed and grabbed your hand, pulling you into his hold, “Relax Ace, I was only joking.” He fished out the keys to May’s car from his pocket and waved them in front of you. “I can’t wait to hear your playlist.” He dropped to give you a kiss before leading you to the passenger’s side door and opening it for you.

“Good,” you smiled as you pulled your seatbelt on and reached for the aux cord. “‘Cause I’ve been working on this for weeks.”

Peter just smiled from beside you and started up the car as you pulled up your playlist. “Okay, I know this probably fits more for after graduation, but I’ve been dying to play it so we’re listening to it now and on the ride home,” you informed him before pressing play on ‘The Spins’ by Mac Miller.

“Whatever you want Ace,” he said as he placed his hand on the head of your seat, turned his head, and turned the wheel as he backed out. Blood rushed to your face as he pulled the car out of its designated parking spot. “But I wanna hear that One Republic song.”

You knew which one he meant. “Already in the playlist and cued up to play next pretty boy.”

He smiled softly and shot you a look from the corner of his eye, “You’re absolutely perfect, y’know that Ace?” Reaching over the center console, he grabbed your hand and intertwined your fingers.

You lifted your enjoined hands and pressed a kiss to his. “I know, and you’re not too bad yourself Peter Parker.”

He squeezed your hand and held it tight for the rest of the ride as you sang your heart out as if he was scared that when he let go, he wouldn’t have the privilege anymore.

When you arrived at the school, Peter rushed out to open your door and the two of walked hand in hand to the auditorium where all the students were to be gathered until they walked out to the football field where the ceremony was being held.

Entering the auditorium, the place was flooding with students and as soon as you saw MJ you were flying out of Peter’s grip and pulling her into another big hug.

“There’s gonna be a lot of these,” you warned her.

“You wouldn’t be you if there weren’t,” she remarked but held you just as tight.

The two of you took a seat over by the chairs while Ned and Peter hung out closer to the doors. As you were talking with MJ you noticed that it looked like they were in a deep, heated conversation and…were you crazy or did Ned keep glancing at you?

“Any idea what they’re up to?” You nudged MJ and jutted your chin in their direction.

“Probably talking about how their bromance will make it through thick and thin,” she rolled her eyes but when she noticed you still staring confusedly in their direction she placed a gentle hand on your shoulder, “Relax Y/N, really, I’m sure it’s fine.”

You could’ve mentioned how Peter had been acting weird for weeks now, that he always seemed to be in a different placelike something constantly plagued his mind. You were sure if anyone had noticed it would’ve been MJ since there was no one you knew who was quite as observant as her. You could’ve mentioned these things and tried to gauge her opinion on it, but just as you were contemplating whether or not you should, your principal walked in and started guiding you all to the doors. It was time.

As students began filing out into the hallways, it was hard to keep track of anyone in the wide array of blue caps and gowns. You had a funny thought of how it kind of looked like a tsunami.

You needed to find Peter and wish him luck one last time, the poor boy had been basically losing his mind for the past few weeks leading up to today and you wanted to make sure he was alright. Standing on your tiptoes looking around while everyone moved ahead, you finally spotted him.

Shoving your way through the bodies you made your way right beside him. “Hey!”

He jumped a little, looking paler than he did before and your heart deflated seeing how affected he was by today. “God, Ace. Scared me.”

“All those super senses and for what? Anyway, listen,” you placed your hand on your shoulder and pushed him so the two of you were to the side of the hallway and the rest of the line moved freely.

“Peter, are you okay?” You asked in a more serious voice, hoping he would just come out and tell you what had been bothering him.

You had no idea why but his face got even whiter. “What do you mean? I’m fine.” He chuckled nervously.

You sighed and gave him a big hug. “It’s gonna be fine Pete, pretty soon we’re gonna be high school graduates driving home.” You grinned up at him.

He tried to reciprocate, he really did, but you could see the strain on his face while he did, which only tugged on your heart more.

“I know Ace,” he pressed a kiss to your forehead, “come on, we have to take our seats soon, I don’t want you getting in trouble.”

You wanted to make a joke about how you weren’t sure you could even get in trouble anymore, but it felt like the wrong time. As the two of you walked onto the field, you kept looking up at him but he wouldn’t meet your eyes. You couldn’t wait for this to just be over so you could get your Peter back.

There was a stage set up at the head of the field, with chairs flanking each end and a podium in the middle. The stage faced all the chairs for the graduating students, which is where you would be in a minute, and the bleachers, which werebehind them, were where all the friends and family were sitting.

Peter walked you to your assigned seat and you pulled him into one last hug, “I’m proud of you Petey.”

He squeezed you so tight you wondered if he knew you’d be seeing each other right after this ceremony. “I’m prouder than you’ll ever know Ace.”

You waved him off with a smile on your face as he made his way through the crowd. You took a deep breath as you sat down, in a few minutes, your principal was up there giving some speech that you zoned out of in favor of finding your friends in the mass of blue all around you.

You found MJ with no problem and she flipped you off as soon as she caught your eyes, and you gave her heart hands and a cheesy grin in return. Ned wasn’t far from her and you gave a little wave which he returned with a sad half-smile. Weird…but it was Ned so you didn’t take it to heart.

When you saw Peter he was already gazing at you with an unreadable expression. Hoping to ease him up a little, you sent a storm of air kisses and you watched as he laughed and pretended to catch them all.

Pretty soon they were calling the names. You clapped for everyone, cheering a little for kids you were closer with, but going all out for your closest friends.

When MJ was called up you were hollering like a maniac, smashing your hands together as hard as you could. When it was Ned’s turn you whistled as loud as you could and when Peter was called up, you jumped up, lifted your hands over your head, and screamed.

You watched his knowing smile as he made his way across the stage, he’d heard you, and after he’d trapped his diplomahe caught you staring and mouthed an ‘I love you’. You smiled happily as you blew him more air kisses.

You didn’t have it in you to be embarrassed at all. Everyone was going the extra mile to cheer on their friends and whileyou might’ve tried to be less obnoxious on any other occasion, it was your graduation and Peter deserved some obnoxious cheering for how much he’d been stressing lately.

When it was your turn the cheering was returned tenfold. Peter, Ned, MJ, and all your other friends were clapping and yelling for you. You spotted your parents sitting with May in the back and you waved to the three of them excitedly. You heard Peter give an extremely loud whistle as you grabbed your diploma and shook hands with your teacher, which made you grin absurdly. By the time you made it back to your seat your face hurt from smiling so much.

You were buzzing with excitement as you waited for it all to be over so you could go and celebrate with everyone. It seemed like a lifetime till you heard the huge “Congratulations!’ on the speakers and everyone was standing up and throwing their caps into the air.

The atmosphere was amazing, everyone was buzzing with an energy different than you’d ever felt before and you knew right then, you’d always look back fondly at this moment right now.

MJ was beside you in an instant and you almost burst into tears at the fact that she was the one to hug you this time. “You were taking too long,” she mumbled and you felt a few tears slip out.

Soon Ned and Peter were on the two of you and you shoved into a big group hug, which had MJ rolling her eyes. “I only wanted her,” she stated, but you knew that wasn’t true.

You slipped out when you noticed Ned and MJ congratulating each other and took that as your chance to tackle Peter in a huge bear hug.

“You finally did it!” You laughed, arms hooked around his neck as he lifted you slightly.

“We did it, Ace,” he said and you almost melted into a puddle right then when you pulled away and noticed he was smiling. The crinkles were back.

But they didn’t last long.

The two of you made your way over to where your parents and May were awaiting you and they all pulled you into a fierce hug. Your mom was a mess and you tried to calm her down telling her if she didn’t stop, you’d be crying right beside her. Your dad was a little more composed but you could still see the emotion on his face. “I’m really proud of you kiddo.” He mumbled as he held you tight.

“Thank you, Dad,” you sniffled a little. You were barely out of that when May was crushing you with her arms, making you laugh. She was always good at that, cheering you up.

“I can’t believe you just graduated high school!” She said in disbelief. “I know,” you replied equally as confused.

Laughing, she pulled you in tighter and pulled Peter in as well. When you looked up at him he looked a little green in the face, making worry flood through you completely. What could it possibly be now? You had yourself convinced, and he did too, that it was just nerves about graduation, that the celebration was reminding him of the reality of growing up and your lives truly starting was hitting him a little harder. You thought that once it happened he’d relax a little and give himself a little time to breathe. Apparently not.

You pulled him away once you weren’t out of May’s grasp and she was talking with your parents. “Peter,” you whispered, your voice filled with worry for him, “you have to tell me what’s going on.”

“Yeah,” he croaked, eyes turning slightly red which didn’t help your anxiety at all. You watched as he stared past you andwhen you followed his trail of sight, you saw May staring at the two of you with a solemn expression.

Oh no.

You knew in your heart what was about to happen, and yet you wished with everything in you that it wouldn’t.

“Come on,” he mumbled, grabbing your hand and leading you back towards the school. You followed him wordlessly as he opened the door and pulled back into the halls, the same halls you had comforted him just a bit ago, before the two of you had officially graduated you realized.

“Peter,” you repeated, a little breathless this time because no, there was no way. He couldn’t be doing this right now, not…not after everything.

“Ace,” he sighed and rubbed the back of his neck, looking away.

“Peter,” you repeated but your voice was harder this time, letting him know that you were done with him beating around the bush. If he was going to do this, he could come right out and say it.

“I leave in 2 days,” he said quickly. It felt like a slap to the face.

“What do you mean?” Your brain couldn’t comprehend what he was saying.

He continued as if he hadn’t heard your question, avoiding your eyes as he did so. “Well technically I leave tomorrow, but I arrive the day after so…? I’m not really sure what—”

“Peter!”

He sighed and grabbed your hands, looking you in the face. “Ace, I am so sorry, like so, so, sorry. I wanted to tell you sooner I really did, and I tried! But every time it felt like it would just ruin everything and I couldn’t, I couldn’t ruin it, so I waited and—”

“Peter I swear to god if you don’t tell me exactly what the fuck you're talking about I will leave your fucking imprint on one of these lockers.”

You watched him gulp and you felt a strange sort of satisfaction seeing how you scared him. “I’m leaving,” he said in a quieter tone. “I got accepted into one of Duke's scientific summer programs and I leave tomorrow.”

It felt like a fucking punch to the gut.

“What program,” you said in disbelief, your mind reeling with all this information. “You never said anything about a program.” You looked up at him with a hurt expression.

“Ace, you’ve got to believe me when I tell you I thought I had no fucking shot getting in, I mean,” he squeezed your hands as he spoke, “really. You should see how exclusive these things are. I wasn’t even going to apply but the dude who gave me my tour around campus convinced me, and then I forgot about it until I got the email, and—”

You shook your head quickly, trying to comprehend everything. “Wait but your tour was months ago.” You looked up at him. “When did you find out you got in?”

His eyes widened and your heart fell at the realization that he’d been keeping this from you for so long. When he didn’t answer you pushed “When Peter?”

“Not that long, I promise, probably a few weeks but I just—it’s been driving me crazy how to bring this up. There was no right time, I mean, I didn’t want to do it before graduation—”

“Well how thoughtful of you to wait till right after,” you snapped back. “No, really, didn’t even give me a chance to get out of the cap and gown!” You pulled away from him and scoffed, not wanting to be anywhere near him.

“Come on Ace, please,” he pleaded, and you dropped your head into your hands. You didn’t want to cry, today was supposed to be a happy day, and it had been! Before all this.

“When do you leave?” You whispered. You were sure he’d mentioned it but you were also sure your head wasn’t working right.

“Tomorrow. At night,” he spoke in an equally quiet voice, as if the softer the sound waves, the softer the blow they would deliver. That wasn’t true.

You held back a sob.

“When do you get back?” An equally important question.

“I…I don’t. The program ends as soon as school starts…May’s shipping my things there.”

It felt as if he was physically tearing your heart out of your chest and stomping on it.

One day. All this time you’d been shoving away dealing with the reality of the situation because you wanted to be able to enjoy your summer, because you believed you still had summer left together and now he was taking that from you. It didn’t even feel like he had pulled the rug out from under your feet it felt as if he had shattered the whole ground.

“Congratulations Peter,” you said sincerely. This was breaking your heart but deny that this was an amazing opportunity. If anyone in the world deserved it, it would be him.

“Ace wait,” he moved in front of you, grabbing your chin and lifting it so you had to see his sad face. You wished he hadn’t, you didn’t want to watch him cry. “Please don’t be upset, I won't be able to go if you're mad at me.”

“Well I am upset Peter! Not that you got in, I’m so excited for you, but you didn’t tell me, and you leave tomorrow!” Your voice broke and you could stop the tears as they flooded your eyes and streamed down your face. How could this be happening? Everything was perfect and now this?

Peter pulled you into his arms, “Please don’t cry Ace,” he begged, which in turn only made you sob harder. “I’m so sorry, so sorry,” he murmured as he kissed the side of your head.

“But this isn’t forever. I’m going to come back and I’m going to find you,” he pulled away and held you by the shoulders, making sure you were looking at him, “You’re the only person I want Ace, you’re the love of my life. And I don’t want to hold you back from the amazing life you're going to start at Columbia, I can’t have you going to your dream school with one foot out the door,

“We’re going to grow and learn, and I might not be there for all of it, but we’re going to be together eventually because I want you. This is just goodbye for now.”

You closed your eyes and savored his words. You wanted nothing more than to believe every syllable.

“Promise?”

“Of course Ace.”

And maybe if you hadn’t been such a fool in love, maybe if you hadn’t been so desperate to hang on to anything that promised the two of you would find each other again, you would’ve known promises like that were rarely lived up to.

hey, sorry but i can’t make it back for winter break. weather issues :(

Your heart fell.

You were so looking forward to this, seeing him again, spending time with him and May, for things to feel like they were, even if it were for a brief moment.

You took a deep breath and stared at the two presents on your nightstand. No point in them now. You had gotten the message earlier this morning, around when he was supposed to board, but your phone had been dead.

that really sucks pete, im so sorry

maybe next time <3

He didn’t respond, the only indication you had that he’d even seen it was the little read receipt at the bottom of your text, glaring at you mockingly. You remembered sometime last year when he’d confessed you were the only person he turned them on for.

“Wait why me?”

“You can’t seriously be asking that Ace.”

“Well…I am asking.”

“Because I love you, duh.”

He hadn’t turned them off. You wondered what that meant.

You knew you shouldn’t have gotten your hopes up, knew you shouldn’t have gotten so damn excited, but…god, you really thought things were going to change.

But he had still wanted to see you, he’d still asked you to come over, and it wasn’t his fault his flight got delayed. Talking yourself up a little, you put on your shoes and coat. Grabbing your phone and the presents, you left your dorm. You were going back home, you could drop off the presents at May’s, stop by and see your parents, maybe call Peter if he was feeling up to it, let him know you really had wanted to see him and you were sorry you couldn’t.

It was cold outside and you could see your breath fogging up before you as you walked, but not of it even so much as fazed you. Hope was a beautiful thing, it could change lives, and it was so, so important. Hope was going to be what got you through this time without Peter, and it was going to be the thing that brought you back together.

Because you believed. You believed him back on graduation. You believed that that hadn’t been the end of your story, itcouldn’t have been. You believed when he said he’d come back for you, that you were the only person he wanted, because you felt the same. And…maybe right now he physically couldn’t but that didn’t mean he didn’t want to. You believed andyou hoped. With your whole heart you—

You stopped in your tracks. It felt like your breath was snatched from your lungs and was being held just above your head, so you couldn’t reach it no matter how hard you jumped. You couldn’t believe your eyes.

Because when you turned the corner, you saw Peter walking down the street beside his Aunt, laughing like he hadn’t justcompletely shattered your heart.

What?

You scurried backward, still unable to catch your breath but thankfully aware enough to make sure you got out of the way before either of them could spot you.

Leaning against the wall of the building behind you, you finally let out a breath, watching silently as it floated and then dissipated before you. He was here…

And he didn’t want to see you.

You tried to rationalize it as you looked around, it was clearly snowing, and it was getting thicker by the hour. So it wasn’t far-fetched that his flight really was canceled, plus he had sent you that message earlier this morning, so it was equally possible that he might’ve boarded after all, or found another flight altogether.

And maybe through all that commotion, he had forgotten to update you. Highly unlikely since you’d never known Peter to forget anything, especially when it came to you. But…you’d also never known Peter to lie, not without good reason at least, like about being Spider-Man, or that time Ned got him a birthday gift he didn’t really like, but said he loved it anyway, or any other time he’d lied for the sake of either keeping someone safe, either emotionally, physically, or both.

He didn’t tell you, and it hurt. But something deep inside you trusted him. Maybe it was naive, maybe it was wishful thinking and nothing more but you knew Peter. You’d know him his whole life and never once would you think he purposefully did something to hurt you, hurt your feelings, or anyone’s actually.

Looking down at the wrapped-up present you held, your heart tugged a little. You’d gotten him a Lego set, it was a Map of the Constellations Lego set and it was customizable, so you’d made sure it had all of the ones he’s taught you about. The ones you’d stayed staring at for hours on that hill, talking about everything. It even came with customizable Lego people, which you’d made look like you and Peter (or as much like you as you could with Lego bits), and a little telescope.

You felt like a total idiot.

You could’ve gone anyway, could’ve walked right up those stairs, could’ve said you were there to visit your parents andPeter wasn’t the only thing waiting for you here. But while you may have been feeling idiotic, you weren’t a completeidiot. You knew when you were unwanted. Even if he had just forgotten, if he really wanted you there, he would’ve remembered. And he didn’t.

You were tired when you got back to your dorm. Dropping off the presents, (Peter’s going under the bed, you didn’t want to see it at all, and May’s going on your desk. You’d take it with you when you went to exchange gifts with your parents). It was empty and you were thankful that Lindsay wasn’t there. She was a sweet girl, very bubbly, and you could definitelysee the two of you being friends if you ever got to spend more time with her, but for tonight, you just wanted to be alone.

The end of your bed was against a window and you were grateful for it. Ever since things went south with Peter, you ended most nights sitting at the window. You didn’t know what it was, but you always found yourself looking up at the sky. Maybe it was the fact that anytime you needed him, he would be out your window in minutes, if not seconds. It could be that the sky always reminded you of him. But you figured the simplest answer was probably the right one. You missed him.

It didn’t matter which window, it didn’t matter where you were, sometimes in certain buildings you could barely see the sky. Most times, you couldn’t see any stars at all. Almost every time. But it didn’t matter. Without fail, every night youwould look out the window.

Maybe you’d see him swinging around, maybe you’d catch a glimpse of those stars you both had loved so much. You weren’t really sure what you were waiting to catch. You silently hoped the silence on both ends meant nothing and he still felt the same. You hoped he meant what he’d said to you all those months ago, that he really would come back and find you. Even more, you hoped that what had happened that night was a dumb mistake, or at the very least had a solid excuse to back it up. You knew teenage romances were almost always doomed, but isn’t that why you’d broken things off? So you both could grow, and earn perspective, learn more about yourselves, and when you met again, you’d share everything you’d learned. Every new experience that had ultimately led to the reunion of the two of you. You could handle this for now, the not being together, if it meant you could have him later. That all this waiting and hoping wasn’t for nothing. You had to hope that even though you were leading different lives, in different galaxies, you both clung to the same dreams, otherwise you’d already lost him.

You supposed that’s what you sought comfort in every night. You’d look up at the sky and know it was the same one that blanketed him, wherever he was. You shared the moon, the stars, and your hearts.

You were always a dreamer, a hoper. So without fail, every night, you’d turn on your lamp and sit by the window.

read part 3 here!

‘seasonal' taglist: @keira-kaz2y5 @imafangirlofeverything

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gunnerfc · 6 months

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❄️ WOSO FICMAS: Dec. 23 - Vivianne Miedema ❄️

Vivianne Miedema x Reader (Arsenal & Dutch) | WC: 702

Dec. 23 prompt - opening presents on christmas morning

-> all translations from google!

-> woso ficmas masterlist can be found here!

You felt the sunlight hit your face as you stirred in bed. You softly groaned as you stretched, rolling over to see Viv lying on her side, her arm propping her head up. You gave the forward a quick smile, still not fully awake.

“Goedemorgen lieverd (good morning, love).” Viv whispered, giving you a quick forehead kiss.

“Good morning,” you whispered back, sleep still evident in your voice.

“Vrolijk Kerstfeest (Merry Christmas).” you both said at the same time, laughing softly as you spoke together.

The reminder that it was in fact Christmas morning seemed to jump-start your body. You quickly sat up, doing one last stretch of your arms and back before jumping out of bed and making your way to the bedroom door.

“Nou, kom je niet? (well, aren’t you coming?)” your excitement lacing your words.

Viv laughed at how excited you were for presents, moving as slowly as possible from the bed to tease you. You rolled your eyes at her teasing, holding your hand out for her to take so you could lead the two of you to the living room.

The both of you had been secretive the whole month of December, wrapping presents for each other while the other was out not wanting to give anything away. You were bouncing with excitement, Viv thought it was because you finally got to see what she had gotten you for but it was really because you were excited to see her reaction to her gifts.

You two went back and forth opening gifts, some being things you had mentioned wanting, others being picked under the idea of thinking the other would like it. You both had the same idea and got each other joke gifts as well.

There were two gifts left, both being envelopes that were stuck in the tree so they wouldn’t get messed up under everything else. You grabbed both of them, setting the one that had your name written on it on the table, and handing Viv’s hers to open first.

As the forward opened the card, you were practically bouncing with excitement. You watched Viv’s face as she realized what her gift was.

“Are these tickets for Taylor Swift?” you could hear the shock in her voice.

Viv had tried so hard to get tickets to Taylor Swift’s The Ears Tour in London but had zero luck. You knew what it would mean to Viv to see Taylor in concert which made it so hard to not say anything when you got them, instead waiting to give them to her now.

“How did you even get these?!” Viv gasped.

“Resell! I was checking every day after the sale ended to see if anyone had put any back up!” you beamed at your girlfriend, proud of yourself for actually getting them.

Viv sat the card and printed screenshot of the ticket confirmation on the table and moved to pull you in for a tight hug, mumbling a small “thank you.” You pulled away to give her a quick peck to say ‘you're welcome.’

“Oké, jouw beurt. (okay, your turn.)” Viv said, reaching forward to pick up the envelope you had set down earlier.

With quick fingers, you pulled the card from the envelope, taking a second to read what was written on the front before opening it. Your eyes quickly scanned the handwritten note Viv had written, feeling your skin heat up at her loving words. You then took the folded piece of paper that was in the card and opened it. Your eyes grew in size seeing flight information for a vacation to Greece. You had been talking non-stop about wanting to visit and now you were going to after the Olympics next year when you had time off.

You quickly sat everything down and all but jumped into Viv’s arms. You whispered “thank you” each time you placed a quick peck on her lips. Your girlfriend laughed at your actions and wrapped her arms around you pulling you into a long hug.

The two of you spent the rest of the day cuddled up together, excitingly making plans for outfits for the concert and what you wanted to see and do while in Greece.

#woso x reader #woso #awfc x reader #nedwnt x reader #vivianne miedema #vivianne miedema x reader

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ashley-is-tired-af · 8 months

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You are in Love

Mattheo x reader

Warnings : brief mention of drugs.

Hey guys, I've never actually posted fanfiction on this website, but I'm not a stranger to writing it- no I will not let you track down my cringy middle school AO3 content. I've never written for this fandom before, but it and this character have really been an obsession of mine recently. This is a short little fic I wrote about you realizing you're in love with Mattheo. Lyrics from the song You Are in Love by Taylor Swift.

~~~~~~~

You were sitting in the library, studying for the upcoming Herbology exam. The last one had kicked your butt, how were you supposed to memorize all those different plants? To say the least, you couldn’t afford to do poorly on this next one. So here you had been all afternoon, studying away so you could hang out with your friends later. The library was silent, the only sounds were the scratching of feathers on parchment, flipping pages and the occasional half stifled cough. With how quiet it was you’d think you’d have heard him sneaking up behind you. Hearing the mug hit the table you looked up from the mandrake diagram you were so desperately trying to memorize. Your eyes landed on the cup of tea and followed the hand up to meet the eyes of your boyfriend, Mattheo Riddle. He gave you a smile then sat across from you, pulling out his own homework.

You can hear it in the silence.

You, Mattheo, and your friends sat just inside the forbidden forest at your secret spot. It was a warmer evening, so the gang had decided to grab their coats and pass around the joint. A night of laughter and stories was much needed. The war was looming ever closer and you had all unwillingly become tied up in it. As the night grew long you grew tired and cold. Mattheo, who had noticed at the first yawn, made some excuse for why the two of you had to leave. It almost seemed like he couldn’t wait to get you alone. He grabbed your hand leading you from the forest back toward the castle. You leaned into him, into the warmth. He shook his head and wrapped his arm around you, leading you off to the dormitories.

You can feel it on the way home.

He had led you back to his place, which was not a shock. Recently you had spent more nights here then in your own room. Staying in a room alone with your boyfriend sounded a lot nicer than in your shared room most nights. Not that you didn’t love your roommate. You changed into his sweatshirt and crawled under the covers. Mattheo turned off the lights and slid in next to you.

After a few hours of slumber you woke up, needing a glass of water. You untangled your body from Mattheo's embrace, trying your best not to wake him. You reach out to the water bottle on your night stand and take a few sips, turning back to the sleeping form of your boyfriend. In the nearly dark room, you could only make out his vague figure, huddled under the blankets. You watched as the blankets rose and fell in time with his breaths, a smile coming to your face.

You can see it with the lights out.

The two of you had yet to say the words, and you didn’t know where he stood on it. But in this moment, you knew.

You are in love.

#harry potter #slytherin #mattheo riddle #mattheo riddle x reader #mattheo riddle x you #mattheo riddle x y/n #taylor swift #you are in love #songfic #fanfic #hogwarts

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sc0tters · 11 months

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Welcome Wagon | Andrei Svechnikov

summary: when less that fortunate circumstances cause you to live with your older brother, you realise it might not be as bad as you once thought once you meet his teammate Andrei.

song: Last Great American Dynasty - Taylor Swift

request: yes/no

warnings: like three swear words, two allusions to sexual thoughts but nothing explicit.

word count: 2.76k

authors note: to the person who requested this, I hope you have the best day like ever! As a proud cat owner it was only right that I picked that Andrei picture. Wikipedia was where I got all of the little facts and Google is where I went for the Russian nickname used in this. Realised that I honestly didn’t keep to the song as much as a probably should have but I hope you still like this! If you want to check out more from the celly you can do so here!

You were never a fan of stability.

Deemed the wild child of the Staal family or as you liked to see it, the accident child given that there was over 9 years between you and your closest brother in age.

Never truly seeming to settle in a place as you had moved all around the US after getting your degree in Canada last year.

All four of your brothers were worried about it when you used your one call to get out of jail on the youngest of the boys, Jared. You thought that he would be the understanding one since he had spent a night in jail before, but clearly you were wrong when you were met with an irritated Jordan who was stood at the door of the police station with his arms crossed. The idea of trying to explain to him that you arrested for trespassing because of a drunk truth or dare game was not something you wanted to hear the lecture about so instead you just ignored the entire interrogation from him.

You had to admit that you were impressed by the way he stood up. Within two weeks you were moved into the guest bedroom of his home where he could keep a watchful eye on you before you gave either one of your parents a heart attack.

The first month went by pretty slot for you, despite your best efforts Jordan didn’t want you meeting his teammates as he feared what they might do when they knew you were there. Jordan knew that you weren’t ugly -as much as the boys like to make you think that you were when you were a child- and he knew that there were key players in the team that if they made a move on you then you’d be in your brothers arms in a week in tears complaining how they broke your heart. As much as he wanted to act like his teammates were better than that, he knew that you had a type and some of the Canes players slotted right into that category.

One player that wasn’t on his radar was Andrei, the total Russian softie. The winger had actually come over one day as Heather had convinced Jordan to invite the lonely boy over for dinner. Andrei had just been dumped by his long term girlfriend and it was safe to say that he had been a wreck “you’re shorter than I thought you’d be. You blurted out as you opened the door as you were met with the boy.

It was suffice to say that Andrei was shocked by your forwardness “you’re not as polite as I thought you’d be.” He shot back wondering who you were.

A giggle fell from your lips as you smiled “I think I’m going to like you.” You confessed as you leaned backwards to look towards the kitchen “Andrei is here!” You called out as you waited for Jordan to make his way over to the door.

Jordan sent you a warning look to behave as he knew what you were like sometimes “I see you’ve met my sister,” the Canes captain pointed out as he motioned to you.

Just as predicted you stuck your hand out “y/n,” you introduced yourself as you smirked. You could see the way that Andrei’s face dropped, everyone and their mother knew that if there’s one person you don’t go for. It’s your captains sister.

Now what you did next was not your proudest of moments, but you wanted to see how face you could push the boy “but you could call me anything you want.” There was a playful gleam in your eyes as you watched the Russian turn red.

Jordan scoffed as he reminded you that he was still there “inside,” your brother rolled his eyes as he pushed you back inside letting the younger hockey player come in too.

Heather couldn’t help but laugh as she could already see what you were plotting “he’s a good kid,” she pointed out as you nodded.

You just smiled “I’m sure he’s good at a lot of things.” Your words were a mumble that only the two of you could hear “preach to that.” It was comforting that your brothers wife was your little cheerleader in what was inevitably going to get at least one of you in trouble.

That dinner had gone down like fine wine as you let your eyes do more talking than your mouth. You would let them linger on the Russian long enough for him to know that you were definitely interested but not to the point where it was weird and inappropriate. Heather had helped your cause when she convinced Jordan to come check on the kids with her as Andrei was leaving “thanks for dinner,” he smiled as he waved the duo up the stairs.

The North Carolina air was humid as it hit your faces “isn’t the boy meant to walk the girl back to her car after the first date?” You joked as you cracked your cheeky grin.

It was actually really nice for Andrei to have someone in his life who was displaying this much interest in him “our first date is not going to involve your brother.” He was quick to point out as he got to his car.

You had to admit that your thighs were very much clenched in that moment “who says that I want to go on a date with you?” You asked as your crossed your arms sending him a thoughtful glance.

That moment when the hockey players lips turned into a smirk you were taken off guard “I’ve been seeing the way you’ve looked at me all night.” Andrei explained as he took a step forward as he brushed the hair out of your face.

You felt your cheeks turn pink at the moment of intimacy “you’re going to need a way to contact me then,” you pointed out as you held your hand out so he could put his phone in it.

The hockey player let out a soft laugh as he shook his head before he pulled his phone out of his back pocket. He loved the sound of your nails tapping on his screen as you put your contact info into the device “look forward to hearing from you Andrei.” You smiled as you handed his phone back to him.

The boy placed his phone back into his pocket “don’t miss me too much now radnaja,” he sent you a soft salute but was almost knocked off of his feet when you stood on your tippy toes to kiss him “goodnight Andrei.” You mimicked your actions before you began to walk away making sure that you let out your little laughing cheer before the door was between you two.

Month two of living with Jordan was all of a sudden far more interesting once Andrei let it slip to Pyotr that the Canadians sister was living with him. Within two days you ended up meeting the whole team. Most nights you spent sat on FaceTime with the winger as you two spoke about stupid shit. The topics ranged from what your plans were to what stupid shit Jordan did during the day “I’ve got to get going,” you let out a giggle as you had been trying to get off of the call for the last twenty minutes.

Andrei forced his lips into a pout “don’t leave me just yet radnaja.” He begged as you playfully rolled your eyes.

You fiddled with the ends of your hoodie strings “if I didn’t know any better I’d say you were getting clingy Andrei.” Your tongue darted out of your mouth as it swiped across your lower lip.

The boy scoffed as he shook his head “how can I be clingy if we haven’t even gone on that date yet?” He shot back causing you to laugh “who’s fault is that!” You pointed out in a duh tone.

Yes it had been over a month since you met Andrei and after 34 days of talking -not that you were counting because that would have been weird- he still hadn’t taken you on that date that you two spoke about on the first night you met “thinking I’ll get one out of Jack first.” It didn’t take a genius to see that Andrei wasn’t a fan of how your friendship with the American had blossomed. Sure it might have sounded selfish but the Russian wanted you for his eyes and company only.

So naturally your comment caused his expression to harden “I’m taking you out tomorrow.” He announced causing your eyes to go wide.

The way the boys voice got deeper and his eyes went darker made you feel the pool that formed in your panties “how do you know I don’t have plans then already?” You sipped at your water as you held in another laugh.

All Andrei could do was smirk “we both know that you’d cancel them for me.” His voice was confident as he knew what he was talking about, and he certainly wasn’t wrong.

So naturally you had spent the entire next day getting ready for the date. When you came downstairs you were surprised to see that Andrei and Jordan were in the middle of a pretty normal sounding conversation.

Andrei almost lost his entire train of thought when he saw you walking over to them “you better not be threatening him Jordy,” you warned as you sent your brother a serious look.

It made the Canes captain smile how oblivious you were. Andrei had told him about his desires to take you out exactly fifteen days ago. It started with the Russian pulling him aside after training as he was desperate to get it off of his chest “was just telling him to make sure that you are home before midnight.” Now that part was true, Jordan did not need to hear you strolling back into the house at two in the morning because if he did then the captain was going to make a morning training session.

Andrei was quick to nod “should we get going?” He asked as he watched you kiss your brothers cheek as you locked your hand in the Russians before you pulled him out of the house.

Jordan couldn’t help it when he laughed “she’s going to kill him.” He smiled to himself as he shook his head before he walked back to the living room.

The winger was quick to place his arm around your shoulders as he slowed down the pace to his car “you look nice,” his compliment caused your cheeks to turn flushed as you looked up at him “one of us had to look good.” You shrugged softly smiling to yourself as the Russian opened the door for you.

Part of you thought that going on a date with Andrei would be a disappointment, most of the dates you went on with guys your age usually were. You began to think that you were the problem in those dates as you were always the common denominator. But tonight squashed each and every one of those doubts and bits of hesitancy.

You had learnt about Andrei’s family, his favourite Russian words, even what he missed about home. And he had gotten the chance to learn about what brought you to North Carolina.

As he walked you back to the front door of the house you let a smile fall onto your lips “glad you held up on your promise Andrei.” You mumbled as the boy placed his hand on the small of your back.

Andrei couldn’t help it but grin when you brought up your joke from the first night you met him “always knew I would radnaja.” There was that name he kept on using for you.

When you stopped in your tracks it caused him to grow slightly alarmed “what does that mean?” You asked as you furrowed your eyebrows “what?” He cocked his head as he had no clue what you were talking about.

For someone who had heard the word so many times, you sure did butcher the pronunciation of it “ranada,” it fell from your lips like he should have known exactly what it was.

The hockey player laughed as he used his hand to cup your cheek “Radnaja is like daring.” When he saw that your mouth opened like you were trying to process what he had said, Andrei instantly thought that he had butchered it “darling?” You let out a giggle when he nodded.

All you could do was smile as you looked up at the boy “maybe we should spend some time learning each others languages better.” You proposed causing the boy to chuckle “I like the sound of that.” He nodded as he smiled.

The idea of teaching you Russian made his heart warm, but nothing was going to be prepare him for what you did next “we should do this again soon.” You shrugged as you placed a kiss on his cheek.

The gesture was one that was familiar to the two of you, but somehow he was never going to get used to it.

Andrei was totally unaware of the fact that it was the whole reason why you did it. Yes it might have been a touch manipulative but you loved how you could pull so many reactions from him whenever you did that “goodnight Andrei.” You laughed as you saw Jordan watching the two of through the window.

The captain had no shame as he was honestly just watching out of curiosity, he knew you’d be telling Heather the truth about the date so for Jordan to learn about it he’d have to partake in the game of broken telephone.

Stability used to freak you out, even make you feel out of place. But by month four you were craving it. Another two dates had gone by with Andrei and he still hadn’t kissed you. Don’t get you wrong, you loved how respectful he was as it was a stark difference from the guys you used to be with. Yet you were almost growing concerned that he had lost interest in you. Thankfully though for you, you had voiced these concerns off to Heather who quickly shut them down “he looks at you like you’re the only girl in the world.” She pointed out in a duh tone making it sound like you were the idiot for not picking up on how the boy felt about you.

That conversation with her was how you got to another one of your language lessons with Andrei. Every Tuesday you’d do them if he wasn’t on a road trip “that’s just a stupid phrase!” You scoffed causing the boy to throw his head back in amusement “no it’s not!” He laughed as you threw some popcorn at him.

Tuesday language lessons weren’t complete if they didn’t have snacks “I have a phrase I was you to learn.” It was like a lightbulb moment where you had to do your best to mask your smirk as you tucked your hair behind your ears “I have a phrase I want you to repeat.” You smiled as you inched your leg ever so closer to him “fire away.” Andrei nodded as he placed his hand on your knee.

Somehow you weren’t that nervous to say it “I want you to kiss me.” You blurted out causing his eyes to go wide.

He took a second to process your words before he gave you an ‘are you being serious’ type of look. All you had to do was nod and his lips were on yours. Andrei’s hand that came to cup your cheek was almost the same size as your face but neither one of you seemed to care. In all of it you had somehow found your place on his lap “wait,” you were quick to pull away causing the boy to softly tug at your bottom lip leaving it now slightly swollen “yes?” Andrei asked as he cocked his head.

You tried your best to make it look like were being serious “you haven’t taught me the translation.” You batted your eyelashes at him causing the boy to let out a groan “seriously?”

When his head feel back you couldn’t help but laugh as you hooked two fingers under his chin “I’m just screwing with you.”

Maybe North Carolina wasn’t as bad as it first seemed.

#andrei svechnikov #Andrei Svechnikov imagines #Andrei Svechnikov oneshots #hockey imagine #nhl imagine #nhl oneshot #hockey imagines #imagines #oneshots #ambers 150 celly #amber writes fics

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Speak Now Timeline

This is a very long post that puts all the songs on Speak Now in order of Taylor creating them. I’ve also added a few other songs she wrote while writing Speak Now and quotes from Taylor and her collaborators talking about her process.

If you don't want to read all that, check out this playlist of the album in order or this playlist of her entire discography.

Due to a surprising amount of digital decay and her life not being highly documented yet, exact dates are bit harder to come by then they are with following albums, but you can still find a few! I’ve added this color coded scale of how sure I am of the date:

Confirmed: There is some type of official source for the date

Inferring: Nobody has officially said “This is when we wrote it,” but everything points to that date

Speculation: This date is based off pure vibes and guesswork and is highly likely to change.

Unknown: All that is known is the year (from the US Copyright Offices)

More notes: I will probably be editing it as information about vault songs and new details about old songs get come out, so it probably won’t be finished until July, so check back in with this post and/or follow me if you want updates. Most tweet dates come from crawling through the wayback machine, but if you want further sourcing, feel free me an ask/dm.

Without further ado...

Sparks Fly: Late 2006 (Inferring)

Taylor opened up for Jake Owen on October 31, 2006 In Portland, Oregon (the secret message for the song), and wrote Sparks Fly about the experience shortly after. I’ve seen a few second hand sources say she wrote it on the airplane ride back to Nashville later that same night, but I can’t find Taylor herself saying that, so it might just be an old fandom legend, or the source has been lost to digital decay, or I just haven’t looked hard enough. She first performs the song in May 29, 2007.

Haunted: 2009 (Unknown)

Taylor: "Haunted" is about the moment that you realize the person you're in love with is drifting and fading fast. And you don't know what to do, but in that period of time, in that phase of love, where it's fading out, time moves so slowly. Everything hinges on what that last text message said, and you're realizing that he's kind of falling out of love. That's a really heartbreaking and tragic thing to go through, because the whole time you're trying to tell yourself it's not happening. I went through this, and I ended up waking up in the middle of the night and writing this song about it.

February 17, 2009: Tweets "It's 3:58 am in London.. And I accidentally fell asleep at 6:30 pm, so now I'm wide awake and have no idea what to do. Write a song?"

It’s possible that this was what Taylor was referring to when she said she “ended up waking up in the middle of the night and writing [Haunted]”, but it’s also very possible that Taylor didn’t write a song on February 17, and waking up in the middle of the night and writing a song is not a rare occurrence in Taylor’s life, so one tweet doesn’t really prove anything.

March 13, 2009: Tweets "A day off in Sydney. Drove two hours out of the city and spent the day on the beach. Wrote a chorus you'll hear on the next record. :)"

Pure speculation, but I think she was working on Mr. Perfectly Fine. It was created in 2009, and in my opinion, of the possible songs it has the most notable chorus.

March 19, 2009: Posts on Myspace “I’m wiped out. I’ve been in the studio all day ( I know, I know.. We JUST put out a new album. I think I have a problem, I cannot stop writing songs.) It’s so much fun knowing that you can take your time, because you have like a year and a half to make something you’re really proud of. I love recording a few songs, waiting a few months, recording a few more.. Instead of devoting a few weeks to “record the album” and then it’s just done. I like dragging it out, that way you can be meticulous about every detail. Daydream about different ways to put the songs together, and then take them apart. I’m pretty obsessed with the whole process. So needless to say, it was good to be back in the studio with my redheaded producer who I missed terribly.”

If This Was A Movie: April 2009 (Inferring)

Taylor has literally never talked about this song, but April would be six months after and Joe Jonas broke up in late September/early October 2008.

April 24, 2009: Taylor plays in Jonesboro, Arkansas, and possibly writes a song: "I'd get my best ideas at 3:00 AM in Arkansas, and didn't have a co-writer around and I'd just finish it. And that would happen again in New York [likely Enchanted], that would happen again in Boston [likely Long Live], that would happen again in Nashville." (x)

May 23, 2009: Taylor records Half Of My Heart with John Mayer

On March 1, 2009: John Mayer tweeted: “Waking up to this song idea that won’t leave my head. 3 days straight now. That means it’s good enough to finish. It’s called Half of My Heart and I want to sing it with Taylor Swift. She would make a killer Stevie Nicks in contrast to my Tom Petty of a song.” On May 23, John Mayer tweeted "I couldn't get Taylor Swift on my record so I found the world's greatest impersonator, Laura Jacksheimer" with a picture of Taylor.

Superman: Spring 2009 (Speculation)

This could have been written any time in 2009, but due to it's general sound and the following quote, I’d guess it was written sometime in spring, when her and John Mayer first started working together. Taylor: “This was a guy that I was sort of enamored with, as usual. This song got its title by something that I just kinda said randomly in conversation. He walked out of the room, I looked over at one of my friends and said, ‘Man, It’s just like watching Superman fly away.’”

May 29, 2009: Posts on Myspace “Tomorrow, after the performance on the Today show, I’ll fly back to Nashville and record a lot of new songs I’ve written in the last few weeks. I’m really excited about that.” (She also posts "Tonight I went shopping at Top Shop in New York with the band. I got purple shoes. I’m really excited about the purple shoes, and I just needed to tell someone. I got purple shoes. Ok. That’s done." Which. If I had a nickel for everytime Taylor teased her new album by posting about shoe colors I'd have two nickels, which isnt a lot but it's weird that it happened twice.)

June 4, 2009: Posts on Facebook "In the studio. I don't know whose computer I'm using. Pssh.. Such a rebel right now.."

June 9, 2009: Tweets (about recording Thug Story) "If I said I was in the studio with T-Pain, would you believe me?"

Better Than Revenge and Let’s Go (Battle): June 2009 (Inferring)

These were probably written sometime between June 12, when the Jonas Brothers released “Much Better”, and July 1, when Taylor posted on Myspace: “What else is new.. Recording a bunch of new songs. Lots of new things to write about…..”

Last Kiss: 2009 (Unknown)

Taylor: "The song "Last Kiss" is sort of like a letter to somebody. You say all of these desperate, hopeless feelings that you have after a breakup. Going through a breakup you feel all of these different things. You feel anger, and you feel confusion, and frustration. Then there is the absolute sadness. The sadness of losing this person, losing all the memories, and the hopes you had for the future. There are times when you have this moment of truth where you just admit to yourself that you miss all these things. When I was in one of those moments I wrote this song."

July 22, 2009: Tweets "Hanging with my producer Nathan, discussing the next adventure" and then in a separate tweet "...album #3."

Never Grow Up: Fall 2009 (Speculation)

Lover Diary Nathan Chapman: "The song 'Never Grow Up' is just she singing and I on acoustic guitar. We recorded ourselves live. That song probably happened in two hours." This could’ve been written at any time in 2009, but I put it here because she bought her Nashville apartment sometime before October.

September 8, 2009: Tweeted "Last night in nash before heading out tomorrow for 4 shows, then VMA's. But right now I can't put the guitar down."

September 13, 2009: VMAs Incident

Enchanted: September 15, 2009 (Confirmed)

On September 15, Taylor attended an Owl City Concert in New York Taylor: "It was about this guy that I met in New York City, and I had talked to him on email or something before, but I had never met him. And meeting him, it was this overwhelming feeling of: I really hope that you're not in love with somebody. And the whole entire way home, I remember the glittery New York City buildings passing by, and then just sitting there thinking, am I ever going to talk to this person again? And that pining away for a romance that may never even happen, but all you have is this hope that it could, and the fear that it never will. I started writing that in the hotel room when I got back. Because it just was this positive, wistful feeling of: I hope you understand just how much I loved meeting you. I hope that you know that meeting you was not something that I took lightly, or just in passing. And I think my favorite part of that song is the part where, in the bridge, it goes to sort of a stream of consciousness of ‘Please don't be in love with someone else/Please don't have somebody waiting on you.' Because at that moment, that's exactly what my thoughts were. And it feels good to write exactly what your thoughts were in a certain moment.”

September 26, 2009: Taylor plays in Little Rock, Arkansas, and possibly writes a song: "I'd get my best ideas at 3:00 AM in Arkansas, and didn't have a co-writer around and I'd just finish it. And that would happen again in New York [Enchanted & Back To December], that would happen again in Boston [Long Live], that would happen again in Nashville." (x)

October 17, 2009: Tweets "Travis: you look so out of it. Me: I'm writing a song in my head. Travis: oh, I apologize. I didn't realize you were working."

November 30, 2009: Tweets "If I had a dime for every time my producer and I blurt out the same thing at the same time, followed by an awkward, uncoordinated high five..."

Ours: December 6, 2009 (Inferring)

Myspace Post on December 6: “I just got back to Nashville this morning after being in LA all week. Today I was out and about and in the studio all day” Taylor: "I wrote this when I was about to turn 20. I was in a relationship I knew people wouldn't approve of, and it was just a matter of time before everyone found out. When you're first getting to know someone, it's a fragile time, and then you add newspapers and magazine covers and it can get kind of rough. I wanted to have this song to play for him when it got difficult. Singing it for him was one of the sweetest moments I can remember."

December 22, 2009: Tweets "I was writing a song and my pen fell into the piano. Still trying to figure out if I should do anything about this."

January 2010: Starts polishing up the demos made in 2009 into fully produced tracks

Billboard: "Swift and Chapman had begun recording new songs almost as soon as "Fearless" was released. The two cut demos in his basement studio and would only take those songs to larger facilities once they felt they had an emotional foundation in the basic tracks. Still, it wasn’t until early 2010 when the album truly began to coalesce." Nathan Chapman: "We stripped it down and made the demos first. Taylor came to my studio and I played all the instruments on the demos, and because I have a good vocal booth, her demo vocals ended up being the vocals you hear on the record. After finishing the demos, we went out to different studios, and tried different combinations of engineers and musicians to replace some of the elements of my demos, mostly the programmed drums, and to do additional overdubs. [...] A pop artist would probably release what we'd done after five hours, but country artists don't want to hear programmed drums, they don't want to hear fake stuff. So once we had recorded the demos, we would book whatever studio we wanted for each song, to replace the drums, in many cases the bass, and to add whatever overdubs we envisioned, like fiddle, keyboards, percussion and strings. After we got the demos right, we opened it up and allowed ourselves to spend money and cut a big record." Taylor tweets on January 11: "Studio-ness with all the same boys who played on Fearless" and on January 13: "More recording. So excited. So excited. So excited. See, I said that three times. Once for every album we've made in this studio."

January 13, 2010: Posts on Myspace “Thank you January. I have had this month off. I have walked on snow-covered grass and discovered new coffee shops and laughed hysterically with friends about things that probably weren’t technically funny. I’ve written songs on napkins and sat at a giant table with my whole family on my mother’s birthday, all of us in one place for the first time in too long. I’ve gotten to take what has happened to me and process it to my full capability, and celebrate it the way it deserved to be celebrated. I’ve made new music. I’ve gone over the memories and jumped up and down with my producer and floated around with nothing on my schedule other than just appreciating what my life has somehow turned into. [...] Getting back in the studio with the same guys I trust and know and love.. (right, the pointing one: my producer Nathan Chapman) (Left, the waving one: Bass extraorinaire, Tim Marks. Clearly marked on his road case.) [...] Nick Buddha is in charge of the drums.”

February 22, 2010: Posts on Myspace "I’ve been writing lots of songs"

February 13, 2010: Writes in her diary "I’ve been obsessing over the new album. I always do that until it’s just right. I don’t know if I have the formula just right for this one yet. I know there are great songs. I just need to figure out the strands that bond them together into a great album. And I will obsess until it’s there. This album, any album, is the next 2 years of my life. It has to be more than amazing. It has to be great enough to keep my attention for 2 years."

Mine: March 10-12 2010 (Inferring)

Taylor (above interview, at 5:17): "I wrote Mine somewhere on the road, I think in Texas, actually." Nathan Chapman: "The demo for 'Mine' apparently took less than five hours to record, and sounded, according to Chapman, "almost identical to the record. After that we worked on the track for another four months, off and on, and spent $30,000 to make sure it sounded perfect in the real world."" Taylor: "This song is the first single because it has this…there was this moment between Nathan and I, my producer, when I brought this song in and when we made this demo in one day in his basement and we just kinda looked at each other and we were like, "This is it. This is the one. All of the times that I've had "The Moment" with songs of "This is the one," it's been a good call, so I'm hoping for the best on this one. Wish me luck." Scott Borchetta: "Mine" was a turning point in the album’s development. Swift and Chapman had begun recording new songs almost as soon as "Fearless" was released. The two cut demos in his basement studio and would only take those songs to larger facilities once they felt they had an emotional foundation in the basic tracks. Still, it wasn’t until early 2010 when the album truly began to coalesce. Swift presented "Mine" to Borchetta in his office [...] "We probably played that song four or five times," Borchetta recalls. "I’m jumping around playing air guitar, she’s singing the song back to me, and it was just one of those crazy, fun, Taylor teen-age moments."

March 13, 2010: Taylor records Mine, brings it to Scott Borchetta, and says she’s done with TS3

Scott Borchetta: "I said, ‘Keep going,’ [...] She kind of looked at me like, ‘You’re challenging me.’ And I said, ‘Yeah. You’ve found true north here. Keep going.’ " Taylor: “During Speak Now, when I went to (label head) Scott Borchetta and said, 'The album’s finished,’ he said, 'No, it’s not – you need to keep writing.’” (Right after playing in Texas, Taylor leaves for a vacation in the Bahamas, meaning Taylor likely had about a day in Nashville between the two trips).

Innocent: Late March 2010 (Inferring)

Billboard: “It was some time in the period after that challenge — between February and June — that Swift wrote “Innocent,” her response to the Kanye West incident.” Taylor: “Some songs take 30 minutes to write, and some take six months, which was the case with “Innocent.” When things affect me intensely and really hit me hard, it can take a while to figure out what I think about it and what to say about it.” (March would be just over 6 months since the VMAs).

March 24, 2010: Taylor goes lunch with Taylor Lautner and both of their publicists, inspiring Back To December.

Taylor: Swift says she based the song on a conversation she had with the guy about whom she's singing. "It's not loosely based," she says. "It's almost word-for-word. It is a song and a conversation that needed to happen, because I don't want to hurt people. If you unintentionally do so, you've got to make that better."

Speak Now: Early April, 2010 (Inferring)

On April 3, Taylor attended the wedding of Josh Farro as Hayley Williams (who is Josh's ex) plus one. That day she also tweeted: ""Nathan you smell really good! Is that a new cologne?" "Thanks! Actually it's a two in one shampoo and soap. From Dial." My producer rules." implying she was in the studio. The conversation below could have happened any day after the VMA awards in September, when Hayley first reached out to Taylor, but I think Taylor probably wrote the song fairly close to naming the album after it. Taylor: "This song was inspired by one of my friends who was telling me about her childhood sweetheart, crush guy. They were kind of together in high school and went their separate ways, and it was kind of understood that they were gonna get back together. Then, she one day comes in and tells me he's getting married. He had met this girl who was just this mean person who made him completely stop talking to all of his friends, cut off his family, had him like so completely isolated. And I just, kind of randomly, was like, "So, you gonna speak now?" She was like, "What do you mean?" And I was like "Oh, you know, like storm the church, speak now or forever hold your peace? I'll go with you. I'll play guitar. It would be great." She was just kind of laughing, and later on I just was wrapping my mind around that idea of how tragic it would be if someone you loved was marrying somebody else. Later I had a dream about one of my ex-boyfriends getting married, and it just all came together that I needed to write this song about interrupting a wedding. For me, I like to think of it as good versus evil, and this girl is so completely painted as the evil one. So this is "Speak Now.""

April 13, 2010: Names TS3 Speak Now

Lover Diaries: "So I’ve been obsessing over the new record to the point where it’s all I can focus on. I’m majorly stressed and borderline losing it, with all these lists and chronic dissatisfaction. Perfectionist-ness. I keep growing tired of songs because I know I’ve raised the bar and I can beat half the songs. Scott and I had lunch the other day. We were talking about the record and I had this epiphany. I didn’t talk in interviews about how I felt about much of what has happened in the last 2 years. I’ve been silent about so much that I’m saying on this album. It’s time to Speak Now. Scott freaked out. He loved it. We have a title, ladies and gentlemen!" Scott Borchetta: ""At one point, the record was not called ‘Speak Now.’ It was called ‘Enchanted,’ [...] We were at lunch, and she had played me a bunch of the new songs. I looked at her and I’m like, ‘Taylor, this record isn’t about fairy tales and high school anymore. That’s not where you’re at. I don’t think the record should be called "Enchanted."’” Swift excused herself from the table at that point. By the time she came back, she had the "Speak Now" title"

Dear John: Spring 2010 (Speculation)

This was likely written sometime after February 2010 (Taylor implies she's single in her vlog and her diary). Beyond that, it could have been anytime between February and June 2010.

Brief Interruption: The next two songs (Back to December and Mean) are going to use quotes from this interview that @1989worldtour found. If you've already listened to the interview attached to the Mine section, then it's the same interview

Back To December: Early May, 2010 (Inferring)

Taylor (above interview, at 5:12): "Back to December was written in New York City. Taylor was in New York city from May 3-5, and May 12-15 2010. she was not photographed in New York any other time in early 2010, and given her busy touring schedule, I doubt she was in New York at another time. USA TODAY: “Swift says she based the song on a conversation she had with the guy about whom she's singing. "It's not loosely based," she says. "It's almost word-for-word. It is a song and a conversation that needed to happen, because I don't want to hurt people. If you unintentionally do so, you've got to make that better."”

Mean: May 29, 2010 (Speculation)

Taylor (above interview, about 6 minutes in): "I started this song called Mean on my, like sitting on my kitchen counter, just playing it, and then, you know, took a plane and flew to the venue where we were gonna play that night and finished it in the dressing room." Now, this may be a too literal interpretation of "took a plane and flew to the venue where we were gonna play that night," but if we want to theorize: the only tour date (that Taylor could've conceivably written Mean during) without another show right before or after it was in Baton Rogue on May 29, 2010.

Long Live: June 2010 (Confirmed)

Lover Diary She likely wrote this around June 5, when she ended the Fearless Tour at Gillette Stadium (Wikipedia counts two festivals as being part of the Fearless Tour but Taylor doesn't, so I'm going with her opinion), since she said that she wrote a song for Speak Now in Boston (which is the closest major city to Gillette)

The Story Of Us: June 9-16, 2010 (Confirmed)

Taylor attended the CMT Awards (Which goes on to be the secret message for The Story Of Us) on June 9 and was sat very close to John Mayer. Taylor: "The people closest to me are used to me deserting a conversation and bolting into some corner of the room with my phone out, hunched over, singing some melody or lyric or hook into my phone. I wrote “The Story of Us” about running into an ex at an awards show, and I came home and sat down at a kitchen table and told my mom, “I felt like I was standing alone in a crowded room.” She tried to console me, but I was gone at that point." Lover Diary: "So I’ve been a little studio rat since the tour ended [...] Ever since, I wake up to my cell phone alarm around 9:30 each morning. Throw on a sundress, skip make up, tie my hair in a messy side braid, and head out the door with no shoes on. Because the only walking outside I’ll be doing is from my house to my car, then from my car, three steps to Nathan’s basement studio. [...] I worked on a song for a few days, then basically finished it in the car on the way to Nathan’s this morning. It. Is. So. Good. And I can safely say I am DONE writing this record!! This song is up-tempo, and hooky and sort of torn-sounding … like this horrible stressed confusion that comes on when you knew the person you’re pining away for is in the room. And for some reason, there are these invisible walls keeping things from being ok. So you’re not fine. And they’re not fine. And I’m so happy I wrote that song!! Footage of Taylor working on TSOU

June 30, 2010: Taylor tweets “@amosjheller is SLAYING a bass part in the studio right now. http://twitpic.com/21am7t”

Footage Nathan Chapman: “We tried several bassists until we had a bass part that worked, which was played by Amos Heller, of Taylor's live band. In Nashville, it's rare for a road musician to be on the record, but he earned his way into this record by kicking ass. In fact, all Taylor's road musicians played some parts on the album, which was important for me and her.”

July 15, 2010: The orchestra for Back To December and Haunted are recorded (footage here, same outfit as these candids)

Taylor (talking about Haunted): “I wanted the music and the orchestration to reflect the intensity of the emotion the song is about, so we recorded strings with Paul Buckmaster at Capitol Studios in Los Angeles. It was an amazing experience - recording this entire big, live string section that I think in the end really captured the intense, chaotic feeling of confusion I was looking for."

And that's all for this timeline! Check out my others:

TIMELINES: debut • fearless • speak now • red • 1989 • rep • lover • folklore • evermore • midnights PLAYLISTS: debut • fearless • speak now • red • 1989 • rep • lover • folklore • evermore • midnights • entire discography GENERAL: tag

#txt*#timeline*#taylor swift #if this deletes again i might actually delete my account #let me know if theres a typo or anything my eyes are glazing over

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