#you still want me to have your babies?
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#gaslight#inji#you still want me to have your babies?#me to my husband every other day#just vibes#Spotify
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baby👶 drawings. these are very dear to me rn.. 2nd pic is my Nelavis with @barvin0k's Varonur 🩵 last one is a baby bosmer and snow elf, hairiest of them all. although the bosmer was meant to be my girl Barletta too lols
#tes#skyrim#my art#oc#nelavis#barletta#😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔💔 babies are so sweetum ugh my heart is crumbling rn#referenced some anne g*ddes stuff for dis#i call them snow elves instead of falmer like g*lebor would want me to#i never really get to talk about my elf anatomies at length cus i'm lazy but i sprinkled some info in the first pic#altmer society is EugenicsLand so you could only tell if your child has 'good' traits when they hit puberty#ex. height and shoulder width is something very important to them#if you don't have those traits ur pretty much a failure#other elves have it easier 🤓#idk i still might make some kinda infographic for the way i picture them but umm maybe not who knows#on snow elves and bosmer the fur is still 'confused' when they're in baby stage and is pretty much everywhere#it evens out w/ age and stays on the back; neck; sides of face the most and in places where human body hair wud be#idk ummm..and i think all elves grow their nails out unless they're very intertwined with humans in their life#ex. my snelf elisif; she has her nails trimmed to be regarded as more human i guess#nails are most important to altmer tho and might be a status symbol of some kind... they like using them in combat too#it's shameful for an altmer to not have long nails for any reason but there can be exceptions#like my el*nwen that can't physically grow nails out because of burn injury#so she has fake ones on her combat gloves#it's cute#elf nails aren't as frail as human nails and are more like an animals claws (corny) but bosmers' are the sturdiest#and their nails are curved in shape. for U know. Climbing and stuff#cause dunmer and altmer etc. have straight nails. they can hit the nail salon
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#a doodley#i had to make this blue so tumblr would stop hiding it from the dash#anyway no caption this happened 2 hrs ago#im happy abt my surgery but it and other things this year keep beinging conversations like these up#and i cant handle it at all.#everything my dad tells me just makes me feel worse and not bc its anything bad but bc I Feel Bad#like the conversation then continued to him being like no dont cry im just saying i wpuld have wanted to#quit my job decades ago and set aside money so I wouldnt be struggling as much now but that didnt happen#and i just dont want that to happen to you guys :)#so we have to support u so that your life is what u want it to be#and i cried even more bc what do u mean. thats so sad. ur a person and u were a child and baby once and ur gonna die#and you always almost cry when u talk about your mom who passed away decades ago#and your brothers that passed away#recently and im going to be your age and still sobbing bc i miss my dad. just like i have been prematurely crying about since i was 7#the other day my dad asked my mom if i cried a lot when i was a baby/kid and my mom said no and then my dad#said that when i Did cry it was so severe he thought i would ''drown in my own tears''#bc i could never stop. like. thats still true today. ive been crying on and off since then#i think i mentioned he's just been telling me stories about his life lately and it further fuels this. i get so sad. im sorry your life was#like this. i dont want to die i dont want you to die im sad im sorry im sorry#im scared. im never going to see you again. how horrible. how horrible#i cant enjoy my day today bc every day is a day closer and i get sad
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The Marriage of Aegon III and Jaehaera Targaryen.
They are so Henry VII Elizabeth of York coded...
#imagine you lose your entire family you're forced to marry the daughter of the man who killed your mother#(but she's still family)#your mother was eaten by a dragon and your new wife has a dragon herself#you marry a boy. you don't know him. he has your father's name. his mother put a bounty on your baby brothers head#(but he's still family there is no one else)#Aegon/Jaehaera dynamic would have ate and DEVOURED#literally one of the most tragic Targaryen failmarriages of all time!!!#'you don't want Aegon to be happy!!!' no he's a fictional character I want to be entertained !!!#tell me honestly there's not more meat to this story if Jaehaera lived. aren't things more complex.#jaehaera would be so isolated Aegon at least has Viserys and his sisters who does she have. Gaemon Palehair? maybe#asoiaf#hotd#aegon iii x jaehaera#aegon iii targaryen#jaehaera targaryen#house targaryen#dance of dragons#jaehaegon
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I'M GOING TO LIVE
#lobotomy corporation#lobcorp#lobotomy corp spoilers#lobcorp spoilers#it was intended for 100% abno codex though technically...#library of ruina#angela lobcorp#angela lobotomy corporation#angela lor#eep.. enough tags i hope#the smile she had during the cutscene stuck with me. i got spoiled on what it looked like but the context of it still has me pause#i wanted to try and have it look hurt? a desperate wild thing thats burning with loneliness. a laughter you make when youre rejected by the#very thing you desired and sought after#its hard to describe the feeling. it hurts so much and feels like its eating you inside but it just feels so laughable#it was such an earnest want... to live. project? greater good of humanity? Sickness? What does it matter? what does any of that mean to her?#unable to even see the humanity they wanted to save. only seeing and suffering the horrific steps the project entails. not even having#anyone to call a friend in that eternity. of course... of course she wouldve. oh baby bird#anyways enough semi coherent yappin. the piece still feels like its missing smthn. ehh...
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odysseus the moment when, for the first time in 20 years, nobody is trying to kill him: whelp, guess it's time to kms
#epic the musical#like he's so real for that#it just makes me giggle#also the fact that ruthlessness is mercy#in this case being ruthless to himself is the only mercy against the voices in his head#also also the fact that he became the monster#i.e. the thing he is now fighting#man vs monster to man vs self pipeline is the same battle#also also the fact that he chose his life over everyone else's and is immediately like#fuck#actually i don't want this#but not just because of the guilt#which would do it for any mortal#but because he's battled hunger and storms and monsters and gods to get home to his wife#and now he's on a literal magic prison that makes it IMPOSSIBLE for him to get home to his wife and kid#the only thing he wants to do#like no wonder he's going through it#“please let me close my eyes” king i love you#you may have killed a baby and your idea of greeting the world with open arms is pre-poisoning wine with lotus juice but i still love you#at least the musical version#fae rambles#odysseus
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Oh hey what about a groundhogs day event where the hero has to relive their traumatic “One Bad Day”-esque backstory but it’s another hero they either know really well and the only way to break the loop is letting that horrible event happen
Bc I’m basic my first thought was “Oh, this would absolutely tear up anyone having to walk down crime alley knowing way too well what’s about to happen”
But I’m also obsessed with my blorbo so my other thought was “Omg lol, imagine if one of the adult heroes ended up in Billy’s body just before his parents left to go die on their dig and think maybe they can save their co-worker the tragedy he faced so young only for every attempt they succeed at getting them to stay keep the loop going and they realize they have to let them go and doom this kid all over again. Haha, extra points if the loop actually lasts from that point to them actually dying so they wake up the next day thinking they failed again only for it to be tomorrow and suddenly Uncle E gets the call that his brother and sister in law are dead and then whoever is in Billy’s body is getting thrown out with a suitcase realizing maybe the nightmare is going to last longer.”
And I just had to laugh bc goddamn my brain cant stop with angst
#‘DC stop making Billy miserable’ I say into the mic#‘I can make it worse’ says my brain ready to swing at the orphan with a sledge hammer#Groundhog Day but body swap basically#even funnier if they DONT know their fellow hero but still realizes the warning flags and tries to save them only to keep waking up#that tragedy of knowing what’s going to happen to someone you care about but the only way to escape is to let it happen#also just the jarring shift back to childhood for a lot of these heroes#other ideas being stuff like one Robin dealing with Dicks One Bad Day doing all they can to save his parents#someone dealing with the day Clark lost his parents/Pa specifically as his Bad Day bc he was too baby for the whole Krypton thing#maybe even a villain/antagonist trying to stop their hero from existing but just ending up sympathetic#then when the day is over they are through a whole character arc and don’t even want to fight anymore bc ‘I am so sorry for your loss’#vice versa too since villains have their Bad Days too#if this has been done for DC please tell me so I can go feral over this idea#dc#billy batson#shazam#batman#fanfic inspo#fanfic ideas#groundhog day#dc comics
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tbh i think that even unwinnable fights should be winnable. some of the BEST fights i've ever run as a dm were ones i built kill the players (in a fun way. I had some cutscenes prepped so even the loss would be a different flavour of win)- but then they were clever bastards and managed to either win the fights or pull themselves out of trouble. I think it's perfectly fine to plan for a fight that players aren't supposed to win, but you need to let them. if they can't win, they can't lose, and the meaning of that encounter is diminished. do that too many times, and they stop trusting you to give them roleplay prompts and start expecting to sit there waiting while you drive the story for them.
but if they can win... if there is always the chance to win, no matter how impossible the odds, then they ALWAYS have hope. they always get invested. they feel the big emotions of success or the big emotions of failure, and you fucking Win as a dm/roleplay prompter/lead bastard.
#qsmp neg#qsmp crit#discourse#<- for blacklists#im not grumping or anything im just musing on like. the mechanics of why everyone is so upset about the latest fight#and how it can be avoided while still keeping these fights genuinely difficult and intense#its hard because there's so many players and they all have wildly different strengths and weaknesses#so someone who could take on the code easy needs that enemy scaled differently than someone who isn't a big fighter#but it's hard to do that in a world where they interact w the same enemy#and you only have so much man-power to cater to a big server like this one#and then you bring in the big powerful items that the players can and can't access but which the admins have ultimate power over#and the fact that some of the admins themselves have lag issues or aren't super great at pvp so they accommodate that with better gear#and it starts getting messy#but for the fights themselves yeah regardless of what armour or gear or killing-methods they use there should Always be a win condition#and idk maybe there was one and we just didn't get to see it#but if that win condition is 'parents sit in the safe room with their babies while the others are overrun'#then i think there are ways to build better win conditions#anyway i love game design and player/dm interactions qsmp hire me now i want to know your behind the scenes#jk im too busy to apply#but man. i wanna nerd out so bad that sometimes i think about it
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Forgot to share here.... old doodles of when I finally came around to finding a design I like for Qalaari's mom !!
#it's so fucking funny to me that i inadvertently gave her a variant of the “mom about to die” haircut because... well...#surprise... she did die when Qalaa was young (12) :'^)#Qalaa (now between 20 and 22) still hasn't gotten over it#her mom had really weak health and really shouldn't have had a child but she made her choice#it turned out to be not the best one for her health LMAO#who wouldve thunk#but hey she wanted it and i'm pretty sure she doesn't regret it#but well... Qalaa does feel like she was a participant in her mom's death#(the other participant being her biological father who ran away before she was born and shattered aamira's heart)#ANYWAYS#i love qalaa's messed up familly#it's like a regular messed up story where actually no one (and everyone) is to blame (except Qalaa lmao she asked for NOTHING)#Aaamira gave so so much love to her child ;;;;;; this built the unbreakable core of Qalaa's kindness#aamira#aamira croquelune#aamira molandine#croquelune#still thinking about making that potentiel small DnD 'lore addon' of Qalaa's village that you can take and plug in your very own campaign#as long as you have 'far from civilization' woods or mountains you can put them in there#a village that welcomes the 'monsters' and the cast out#(like aamira)#look at me rambling in the tags lmao i just love qalaari (& her background) so much#last thing tho : you have to understand that Aamira is small and very slight and Qalaari was a HUGE baby and is a really big girl overall
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"What's cookin', good lookin'?"
AKA I love how unhinged both Alfred and Bunet are and I want to study their brains.
#fe engage#alfred#bunet#alear#alear: wow these boys are insanely weird#also alear: i want to eat his vocabulary to study it#it was supposed to be like a modern setting thing so i threw alear in a hoodie in the first part#and i was going to draw alfred running on a track waving to bunet and alear for the bottom part but got lazy lmao#so here please take babies#i am beyond pleased with their support chain (alfred and bunet) because it is just one thing after another of yeah thats them#excuse me can i have a lick - of what? - your flower - you wanna eat my flower? - is that inappropriate?#yeah very normal conversation BUT ONLY FOR THEM#while alfred goes and asks another nations leader yo man whats your favorite muscle#and bunet guilt trips a criminal trying to atone for his sins into eating vegetables#they are absolutely the most kind menaces but still menaces#they care so much about people and their hobbies and they want to share their hobbies and love with people
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“I don’t want it to just be ‘me’ and ‘you’ anymore,” she mumbles, outstretching an unsteady hand. Shangguan Qian is so far away that she can’t even brush the edge of her clothes, let alone grasp her. “Can we… Can we be an ‘us’ again? Please?”
Yun Weishan watches Shangguan Qian carefully for her answer, sifting through the fog of the sea in her eyes. Wearing white and framed by the candlelight, she looks a little too unreal, like she doesn’t belong in the same plane as her at all.
Shangguan Qian exhales. She glances at her hand, keeping it hovering, trembling in mid-air.
“That’s not up to me, is it?” she returns. “What about you, Yun Weishan? Will you show me mercy, or will this all end the same way?”
破晓; daybreak
🌤️ of ten thousand journeys, the path home is the longest one to walk. 🌊 estimated 63k~70k (total) 🌤️ a post-canon fix-it— or, how shangguan qian and yun weishan change each other’s ending 🌊 starting october 25th, this fic will update every friday around 7 PM EST! 🌤️ with cover art and illustrations by the incomparable @notedchampagne <3
link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/58230550
#my writing#ITS HERE. MY NEW MAGNUM OPUS. THE BANE OF MY EXISTENCE. MY MASTERPIECE. THE GHOST HAUNTING ME FOR THE PAST YEAR. ETC#started this fic one year ago when yzy ended and here we are one year later!! because you have to cook what you want to eat!!#thank you so so much sam for your incredible work; it's been such an honour getting to put weiqian through joys and horrors with you <3#my journey to you#yunzhiyu#云之羽#shangguan qian#yun weishan#shangguan qian x yun weishan#weiqian#these are just character notes for now sorry i have to like. remind everyone of canon first/introduce some of my own lore before#we officially get started. also i wanted to post that crazy insane batshit cover with smth and thought if i posted it with the prologue#it would be too much insanity at once. so#and yes that’s an estimated wc to be edited/confirmed when im done bc i still have stuff to write 😭😭😭 hence the delay 😭😭😭#but i wanted this to be out for the anniversary!! so we’re biting the bullet. i promise i will finish this fic it’s literally my baby#kudos comments reblogs are so so so appreciated thank you guys <33
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I will laugh so hard if it turns out that John is making a sincere effort at being a decent parent and it's such an awful outcome for Gideon that I feel like it's plausible. He's giving off such man who thinks of himself as a good guy confronted with oops baby vibes.
#like he did get babytrapped and in fact attempted baby murdered and he knows he shouldn't make it Gideon's problem so he's trying not to#but she is a walking reminder of his dead besties' murder attempt#just. the way he says no reason to be an asshole to the mother of your child#the way he's like oh no you don't have to swear loyalty to me that's an inappropriate amount of pressure to put on our relationship#very funny under the murderstances#but also these are the words of a dude who felt tremendous contempt for men who whine about child support#and yet!! he's a tremendously vindictive and self centred person. what's a guy to do#he got babytrapped and it wasn't even because they wanted him around! it's because they wanted him gone!#and his kid is the murder weapon!#how is this fair?#very fun intersection of him knowing what the correct answer most in line with his values is#with the bit where he's just wildly unqualified to do that#you've got a#sims playing alcohol abusing vengeful god in the midst of a depressive episode#taking a deep breath and attempting a child centric approach#he's not going to be good at it!#he is also not going to immediately murder her to fuck over his enemies tho so he's still winning#for now!
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My opinions on some ships and characters 😼😼😼
Ill explain some stuff in the tags if yall are curious hehe ALSO IN THE REBLOGS. TUMBLR SILENCED ME 😔💔
Template by @stervil !!!
#minecraft story mode#mcsm#OK SO.#first of all these are MY OPINIONS ship what you want#I truly couldn't care less. I actually LOVE hearing about people's ships. Even the ones I don't like. PLEASE YAP ABOUT IT#Also by IDK I mean I genuinely don't know how to feel. Not a negative idk. Just a genuine idk#OKOK ANYWAY#first. I'm so sorry y'all but I find jetra and jeskas so boring and bland... I just. YK when something is so overdone it ruins your opinion#Yeah..#OBVIOUSLY I LOVE JURM. MORE THAN ANYTHING OMG#jack x Ivor and jack X Romeo are ships I've seen. I personally don't see it but I think it could be cute!#Romeo could either be SUPER TOXIC AND ANGSTY 😼😼 or if he's redeemed pretty nice? But still angst. Hehe#ALSO. AM I CRAZY FOR NURM X BINTA??? AGAIN ITS NOT MY MAIN SHIP BUT LIKE.. I KINDA SEE IT-#LIKE#My Nurm and Binta are BEST FRIENDS. like they'll trauma dump. Then have the most TMI wild convo ever. Then gossip and share cat memes.#In the span of ten minutes THEYRE INSEPARABLE LMAOOO#But honestly thinking about it... I kinda ship it-#HELP#ITS CUTE#Especially since both are creatures to me. Critter X critter#Isa Milo and Reggie. I do not care I just need any of them to kiss. Same with the old order#Like I don't care who's with who I just think it's TASTY#My friend introduced me to Nell x Binta and omg.. YES#SOME OTHER SHIPS IVE SEEN THAT I THINK ARE AWESOME: Petra x Xara. Axel x gill. Jesse x Radar#Ummmm IM SO SORRY ABOUT RADAR X PAMA. I've seen some adorable art on this app but I just. Can't get behind it I'm so sorry 😭🩷🩷#PAMA x harper I don't apologise for. The only ship on here that makes me physically recoil#That's her baby..#UHHH I MIGHT ADD MORE HERE LATER THIS IS JUST OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD#Actually scratch that. Change Nurm x Binta to like. THE MORE I THINK ABOUT IT THE MORE I GIGGLE AND KICK MY FEET#I have beef with Aiden. He doesn't deserve love
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He said "Fuck this shit, I'm out" I'm crying. Toriyama's Vegeta was so top shelf 🤌
(From Neko Majin Z Chapter 5!)
#dbtag#Idk why Toei didn't lean into Vegeta being a version of Piccolo you could put in funnier situations like Toriyama wrote#He's reserved and professional and proud but JUST immature enough to bite down on a gag that Piccolo would readily swerve#But they take a lot of Goku's chaotic comedy away too in favor of Hero(tm) writing and that is why I keep pulling my hair out aklsjdlas#Toriyama was sO funny and it bums me out so much that the anime derailed how lighthearted and straight up silly the humor is#and replaced it with Misogyny Is Funny and humiliation kinks asjklfhadjk and it's not just my complaints about Vegeta and Bulma!!#“Goku is running away from his very reasonable wife because he is a goofy little guy who doesn't want to do his chores” becomes#“Chichi is Cruel to Goku who is Trying to be a good husband because she doesn't relate to his passions and vilifies him for having them"#which is not their dynamic at all but dudes in the writing room are like “being married is fucking awful amirite fellas hahaha”#but Toriyama was like “Being married is not for everybody but it can be really great if you and your partner are on the same page”#Chichi's reasonable! And Goku isn't romantically wired but Goku can enthusiastically consent to sex and still not enjoy kissing#those things can be and are true for a lot of people! And it makes even more sense if you hc Goku to be aspec (and audhd coded) like I do#Kissing can feel gross and can be a sensory overload for many folks. Doesn't mean they're stupid or innocent.#(although Goku CAN still ride nimbus so idk what Pure entails in this universe askljad)#Like I am the FIRST person to joke and drag Goku about his marriage as an aspec myself but like legit Goten is a Last Night On Earth baby#He knows what sex is. But also between how socially removed Goku is and how Shy and Conservative Chichi it's not out of line#to assume the actual words sex and kiss have never been spoken in that house skljdlajdf I FULLY believe Chichi uses code words#Chichi thinks her son being blonde makes him a delinquent and still uses honorifics with Goku like it is fully reasonable to assume#that the joke of Goku's naivetè centers around the fact that his wife is too embarrassed to talk about Certain Matters in a normal way#While Bulma and Vegeta are slutty hedonistic cityfolk who need jesus (according to chichi probably...and me but I support them)#anyway. point is. Toriyama was funny as hell and Nekomajin is absolutely ridiculous and goofy and has a fully amoral main character#which just reminded me that toei is allergic to letting goku be a gremlin and so vegeta's not allowed to be a gremlin wrangler#even though that's been his job since the day he met raditz alksdjaskljd
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Nothing quite like banging out 3 new chapter drafts for a single story overnight, while sobbing to yourself through it because even you put yourself in the feels
Shameless fic plug here
#danny phantom#detective comics#fandom things#fandom#danny fenton#phandom#fanfiction#dc x dp#batman#dp x dc#multi fandom blog#AND I'M STILL WRITING#LIKE PLEASE I HAVE WORK TOMORROW/TECHNICALLY TODAY#I HAVE YET TO SLEEP#THE BRAIN GREMLINS WANT ME TO EMOTIONALLY VENT THROUGH DANNY#I'M SO SORRY DANNY BABY BOY#YOU'LL GET YOUR COMFORT I PROMISE#fanfiction writer#fanfic writers#ao3 fanfic#Like are you really writing angst if you aren't struggling to read the words through your tears?#no? just me?#okay 😔😔
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Jack Marsh (2005), Friendship Otherwise - Toward a Levinasian Description of Personal Friendship
#saw carnation lily lily rose by john singer seargent irl today. it was basically at my doorstep all along idk why i never went to see it#it was placed at a corner in the gallery. me and my friend sat down and sketched the paintings of beautiful naked people quite badly. paper#provided by tate britain. she told me about how she couldnt look her boyfriend in the face after a harrowing film about war. when i say the#interview was informal i mean the person who was supposed to be my boss told me let me get you a cider and then he said after#50 years of life he knows people are inherently good and it only takes a little bit of kindness to save this world. he said he tricked#his wife into keeping the baby and then he said he quit his job at a US bank to help people find meaning and in it#he would have liked to find meaning. instead he started climbing with his friends. he said he chews his cigarettes because its a habit from#when he had to hide things from people. the entire time i felt uncomfortable and incredibly enlightened. this is my friends mentor. she has#his pattern of pauses and expletive and penchant for ends-justify-means attitude. i do think im not very clever#but maybe one day i will love you enough to make up for it. i wrote code i dont understand staring at the final error i thought about how#we both thought of how when we're too old to remember the voices of our friends we would like to stand in the pathway of the LHC beam pipe#cut it open and eat light in the freezing cold vacuum (kills you long before radiation will) the invisible puncture wound unfolding dna#back to the start larger than you ever were. you go to heaven once youve been to hell. my friend is in my bed#practicing calculations of eigenvectors by hand and she is uninterested in a visual proof you are uninterested in incompetence#we catch a train this is your kind of burden you tragic hero wincing at that word you only do this because you have to. im the only one#who can. i am a coward in this for the fucking poetry. the visual proofs. the pretty numbers. an architect who was horrible at maths wanted#to be a philosopher and accidentally ended up neck in deep in 70th Error On Visual Studio Code i want to kiss your eyes before we say#goodbye we both know there is no love in the way there should be. I still have your dress in my wardrobe. i hope you make art.#you think im alright head-wise i think you fucking hate me i think ill never be so clever you want me to tell you my idea?#if you wanted more of this world i would have liked to kiss you harder. we cant both be like this. im sorry i cant be with you the whole wa#the love is gone if you have to ask it. his breath catches his eyes feel stiff it is -1.9 kelvin he is near the beam pipe i miss holding#his hand i miss her singing voice i miss his hair and i found the antonym of pain thank you for carrying me home.
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