#you say something anf
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00's female ya romance lead: Dance? But...there is no music.
String Quartet: *rolls out of the bushes, ready to play "I'll be" by Edwin McCain*
#like where do they always come from#early 00 flicks almost led me to believe that there was always a band around somewhere#i mean imagine that shit#you say something anf#*mariachi band pops out of your flower pots*#*barbershop acapella quartet lowers itself down from the ceiling*#*80 people strong orchester comes marching out of grandma's dresser*#what a life that would be#low key epic#00's movies#2000s#early 2000s#chick flick#teen movies
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Did Isayama ever state that Levi stopped eating after Erwin's death and that the cloak Levi wears in season 4 is Erwins?
#anonymous asks#Levi ackerman#Levi#Ships don't interest me#Can i just say something?#But i said this already#Can you guys please stop asking me questions about ships?#I mean this in the nicest way possible okay?#Ship what you ship#Its fun anf i get it#And i cant tell people enough that no Levi ship is canon#Read the manga and watch the anime#I really dont know what else to tell you#I would love if people talked to me about Levi and his character or send me like thirsts
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as someone who isnt super excited for sotm for certain reasons I am really glad that like. it's clear that since ruin theyve been setting up for carnival and sotm IS carnival. so now that carnival is finally coming out, afterwards theyll be moving on to other plotlines since the main villain stuff is sorted out
I'm just rlly happy to finally see a clear direction for how the story is gonna be playing out with like "okay these games were leading up to this so after this will be open possibilites" instead of like. absolutely no info about each upcoming game and being left guessing before it releases and just having to wait and see what's in it and if anything you're looking forward to will be in it
it feels like they have a plan and a solid direction for what they're trying to do and after carnival releases thatll be all that buildup coming to fruition. & we already know from the Scott interview that theres another release 'beyond sotm' that's 'super exciting' so maybe thatll be focusing on another big currently untouched (which is basically all of them) plotline, or even the big campaign game that dawko has been calling security breach 2
#even if i dislike how theyve been handling this whole mimic cassies dad factory mapbot bonnie bully stuff#the past like 2 releases 3 after sotm#after watching johns theory video it really does feel like stuff was more purposeful with thought put into it when u plug in cassies dad#even if the plot of him being behind mxes and trapping mimic is pushing other more important characters aside#its probably what happened and accepting that makes the story at least seem more thought out#it did make me feel better about it bc like. it at least feels like theyre cooking#like what theyre working on DOES have a direction and a plan and it isnt just random stuff like how it felt when hw2 came out#i might still think that the stuff theyve been doing the past few releases is boring af and uninteresting#compared to earlier concepts like focusing on vanny and the possession aspects and sentient glamrocks#(we could see more of it with freddy if theyd let him come back ever)#but like. at least it has thought put into it and feels like theyre actually trying to set shit up for something#like sotm is an ORIGIN#the tagline was 'sometimes you have to understand the past to see the future'#at the end of the day sotm is a setup for a campaign thatll take place in present day anf#even if its taking ten thousand years to get there im excited for it#aka its taken a long time to tell this story setup of cassies dad and mimic and shit and it might be boring for some people#(me)#but at the end of the day its meant to be setup explaining the past of why mimic exists (even if that's already in tbe books)#so after we 'understand' it we can get back to present day#and focus on its current victims vanessa gregory cassie etc#cassies dad is 100% dead if hw2s protag is him so he woukdnt be relevant anymore. just another character thing to serve cassie#im just saying like after sotm its wide open for getting back to the plot#and i think its actually right to say that bc like all of this has been setup. if hw2 protag is cassies dad its a prequel to ruin#so rn ruin is the most recent game in the timeline. meaning the next game that takes place in current tjme will focus on the current mains#Gregory cassie vanessa#sorry for fnaf plot posting again ive been thinking about it a lot the past few days#thought id balance some negative ive posted with a positive since im feeling better about it myself :)#one day we're gonna be so back and its gonna be great#its just gonna be a long annoying wait lmao#thoughts
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god i wish i could stop fuckin thinking this i feel like such a dick i KNOW people with more obvious and more serious disabilities dont "have it better" but i cant stop thinking about it i just wish i could collapse dramatically and get rushed somewhere and magically diagnosed i feel like such a fuckin drama queen because i feel awful all the time but its just like dizziness and pain do i even have the right to claim im disabled? its not like im diagnosed. its not like i know whats wrong. its not like its serious. maybe i am just fuckin faking it.
#i wish i had something horribly wrong with me i know its selfish and bad to say that#but that thought wont leave if i dont write it out#i wish i had some horrible condition or some birth defect or anything that was OBVIOUS that people could find!!!#i just wish i was worse so i wouldnt feel like im stuck in this fuckin limbo#please reply#i want anyone to talk about this i dont care what just please#these thoughts wont leave and i feel like such a dick for thinking them anf they wont fuckin stop#anon says shit#cpunk#cripple punk#vent#rant post#disability#maybe#i dont even fuckin know#i wish i did#i wish i was normal but i know i cant be#so i wish i was WORSE just so i could know something is wrong#you dont have to go “oh its not better if your worse” i KNOW#I KNOW its fuckin selfish n privileged n stupid to think like this n it wotn fucking stop god help me please
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Some games: yay, you beat the game! please enjoy this nice atmospheric music while reading the names of our team :)
Other games: sick, it’s been real, man. let’s send you off with absolute banger *plays the entirety of a rock song that has nothing to do with the game*
#yes this is about alan wake but you know who did it better#infamous second son#also yes I know they thematically fit anf the songs do say something about the plot of the game#but like#I was not expecting major tom here alan wake#you gave me the old gods of asgard I would have been happy with that#but this was nice#alan wake#video games#dare I use an old tag#lowly smoke guy#yeah I shall#just a buzzing bee
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omg the cute autistic/mutual friend at the party I was talking ab way back just moved into our building!!! I legit ran into him omw in and exchanged instas he is SO adorable and cute and I love him like I just wanna be around him so like tf I am SO HAPPY
#im not sure the post is even still up but me n my friends were just having a casual gettogether and i met him n my post was talking ab how#im glad no annoying autsitics have been introduced to me yet bc ive already met like 3 and theyre all either like#smart autistics or adorable autistics or interesting autistics and i have a crush on two of them including the cute autistic this post is ab#like im so HAPPY omg im gonna bug him so much its weird bc idk what u call the type of crush where its like im not searching for romance#but i will do anything to be in ur prescense bc i know id enjoy being friends or partners or whatever the fuck involves KNOWING YOU#idk lol#yutamayo is starting the day off right (#(its 3:47pm)#at the party we were playing Detroit Become Human anf he seems to also be a hyperfixation/skilled autistic bc he SLAYED at the game i just#enjoyed watching him speedplay at that point#and everyone was ig close enough with him to call him by a semiracist nickname bc hes indigenous n his last name wad apparently too long#so i was like NOPE and made sure to spell it out and resay it so i could say his last name properly instead of his nickname#im noy shading them bc its fine to have a close friend thing where ur able to have a joking nickname ab a characteristic like my bestie#calls me “it” sometimes and thats not something i dislike bc we KNOW each other and its the opposite of malicious intent#but yeah i wad likr nah id prefer to know how to say it#then it was like 3am anf there was only like 4ppl left n he was like yeah i gotta go bavk home to whitby apparently he was just gonna#use the electric scooters they have around town but thats like 30min away in the mf a.m#n he didnt wanna crash on our couch which isfine n everyone else was like mkay bye bc yhey wanted to sleep#n i was like NOPE and hunted down bus fare n waited with him at the bus stop for the night bus n made sure he got on it then never saw him#again#until#today#god fucking bless#*introduced to 3 autistics not 3 annoying autistics the post was ab how im gkad i havent met an annoying autistic in my buikding yet*
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Reminiscing about the past
#huntershipping#preciousmetalshipping#trainer gold#trainer silver#i keep thinking about that post talking about weight gain as a sign of healing and i keep thinking about silver so i thought id draw+#something to get that idea out.#struggled somewhat with the dialogue anf attempted to write it as actual speech gold would use#dont tag as kin/me/id please#if you have anything mean to say just dont say anything at all.#gold pokespe#silver pokespe
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Sigh I need to rant about certain people and how there is a background noise of discomfort with every interaction after particular incidents that made me go "bitch you live like this???" but all my typical vent spaces are ones where they might see it and the only ones that they wouldn't see it in are like discord channels that are not for this topic of vent or friends who would be uncomfortable with the topic etc like,,, what do I even do? Stew in it?
#catch me very carefully not saying any details about them or the incidents because i dont want them to knowww#i suddenly understand so much better why my dad stays friends with people who are racist/islamophobic to his face#like yeah theyre fun to talk to and they enjoy the same silly shows as me#qnd when were not talking about The Things its easy to forget about The Incidents#but every conversation feels like im hiding part of myself. it feels like if i stop hiding I'll be crucified#theyre fucking scary bro wtf. i didnt know people like that were real that was always abstract fandom drama stuff#and its not THAT scary but also im terrified after only brief glimpses it could be so much worse but if we dont talk about it I'll never#need to know#im like. king of letting go of the incident anf never talking about it but endlessly rotating it and stewing in it and holding a grudge#ummm. ya. fun times 👍#shout out to my brother for letting me talk about it though they're cool as fuck for that#i need more non-white friends who arent online#or at least arent online in the same circles as these people#tbf i need more non-white friends full stop 😭#i need more friends who are freaks also#if i dont go 'theres something wrong with you' at least once a week then theres something wrong#wait that sounds funny lmao#but yeah i need people who are weird and gross and disturbing. not people who are normal with rancid vibes#uhh whatever. I'll get over it <- lying#vent post#if you're wondering if this post is about you it's probably not. probably#sobbing i hate vagueposting it's so mean but what else do i do here#gotta start making people fill out a questionnaire before i allow them so deep into my life istg
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Me when the intrusive thoughts say that it's not worth it and I really should just hurt myself again because that's what every bone in my body is urging me to do but I persist because got damnit 464 days since last is too good of a day to end on
#and i persist#but its so so hard#and maybe if i told my parents#maybe if i told someone irl#so i could get help#it wouldn't go out that way#ivr heard the way my parents talk#I'd be yelled at for being so dramatic and told to never tell anyone becaude it'd 'make them look like bad parents' or something#but the part in me ghat still knows they're my parents wants them to know but the thought of telling them feels so unsafe#and hearing them laugh in the bext room over while I'm breaking down makes me feel worse#and my brains like well if you were to severly hurt yourself to the point of being unconscious and ndeding medical hell#help#then they'd find out and you wouldn't need to say anything sparing yourself the fear#and obviously that isn't logical but my brain keeps going back to that thought anf it's scary#and it feeks like im running in loops
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Time for me to cry about king's raid again
#it was EVERYTJING TO ME#had a couple years long streak I was on that shit 25/8 bro#in hs I would wake up at 3-4 am just to play before class#I was OBSESSED#anf then...#it all fell apart 😭😭#there's no other game like it#it's still my everything but I just can't play it anymore#it was so freaking good man#the story was getting better and say what u want but I personally loved the updates they did to keep the game fresh with technomagic shit#I was on that shit until they did the numbers cut and that was the last straw#just why would you do that?#they sold their company as far as I'm aware bc they went bankrupt or something I just wish they sold it to someone who could take care#of the game#please#kings raid revival is what they need#I'm on my knees#king's raid#kings raid
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AnF is a story about many things. One of the things is silence. The sparse use of internal monologue at critical moments leaves the reader aching for some kind of speech from the characters. Touma’s main struggle is against the externally-imposed silence he must live in. Masumi wants to be silent and can’t decide whether it’s cowardice or actual desire. Mami speaks loudly and speaks all the time, but she’s so thoroughly stonewalled that she may as well be silent. Futaba speaks quietly, she triggers the series by choosing to exit silence and start communicating.
And Taichi lives in a more universal, suffocating silence of the self. He doesn’t just hold back in talking—sticking to pleasantries, avoiding topics, letting himself hide in implications or small talk—he can’t even communicate with himself. He doesn’t have the vocabulary to understand what it is he thinks. He can’t connect his feelings with words. His internal monologue trails off constantly as he comes close to making A Connection and then spooks.
So Ao no Flag is partly about how hard it is to not be able to speak. The characters’ minor problems are magnified by never being able to acknowledge them or talk about them, they’re constricted, cut off, isolated by the lack of words they find inside themselves OR the lack of willing ears outside. One of the things AnF sets out to do is to have people communicate as reasonably and rationally as possible, and the way it manages to make a good story out of this is that there are just things people can’t say. Under any circumstances. It doesn’t matter that Mami or Taichi or Touma is trying to talk things out before anyone gets hurt, because the things that need to be said are inaudible. They can’t be said. Even if they are spoken out loud, the concepts that they’re trying to convey don’t exist in the lives of people around them. Taichi lives in utter silence for ten chapters trying to come up with a response to a statement that he doesn’t have the words to process.
#bad post revise later. something something the claustrophobic world of grade school#kelsey liveblogs ao no flag#I love the lack of information KAITO gives us about anything.#so much of anf is clear and present…and unsaid. you just have to Know.#the reader as well as the characters is operating with a set of preconceptions and expectations#because of those preconceptions. there are somethings that the comic tells us that we physically can’t read#just as the characters are trying to communicate unthinkable things to one another#people say ‘oh it’s out of left field’ ‘oh taichi didn’t seem like that’ well guess what. taichi doesn’t have a damn clue either#he and we are figuring out the story at the same time. he doesn’t explicitly telegraph the ending to us because he didn’t see it coming!!#yet he understands something deep down that the careful reader can’t ignore
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Having a complicated relationship with your mum is so confusing. It's the knowledge that she taught me the best way to make gravy, how tie my shoes and how to make my bed. But she's also the one that made disparaging comments about my body growing up and is part of the reason I don't want to be a parent myself and why I moved across the country for uni. But she's still my mum and I still find myself wishing I could seek comfort from her when things get a little too hard but the mum I'm longing for doesn't really exist. And I see her in the colour of my eyes and in the way I grit my teeth when I'm angry. She taught me how to do my hair and how to cover up bruises. She's a part of me in all the good and the bad. And there's no way to say you hate someone that doesn't also acknowledge all the good because nothings as ever as black and white as that
#personal#+Extra#i dont know i was making gravy for dinner the way my mum taught me and it got me thinking about how i havent spoken to her in over a week#since she told me that my dad is threatening to kick me out again and i started thinking about the fact im currently at empty student#accommodation for the summer instead of back home like most people anf how part of me feels guilty for that and the other knows im doing#whats best for me and theres a reason i left people keep asking why im so far up north for uni if im from down south and i dont know how to#explain it they look at you a certain way when you say you dont get along with your parents like your an entitled brat that cant see that#theyre just doing whats best for you and theres no way to explain two decades of trauma to someone in a single conversation theres no way#to get them to understand that despite what my parents do and the fact i went as far as i could for uni theyre still my parents and i love#them even when i hate them for everything and although ill being carrying the scars of childhood trauma with me long after ive left them i#cant entirely blame even when i want to they made terrible choice that have shaped me for ever but theyre still people and ill always#resent them for the people they are and the fact they could do better but didnt for us and the fact they fall back into those people like#a bad habit when i spend to long at home in a way that makes feel like theres something wrong with me specifically will always sit with me#but for now im stood in my kitchen making sheppards pie thinking of the way my mum used to make it and the tension that used to hang over#the dining table while we ate and how now my parents dont even eat in the same room and im grateful my little siblings will never know#that side of our parents but it doesnt mean it doesnt hurt every time i see a reflection of my parents in myself and wish i could cut it out
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my analog horror would be called the bozo chronicles because every time I think wow I should try and get into some well written and conceptualized horror they seem to be having so much fun and then I make it half way through a review actually watching it and have to do guided meditation and breathing excersizes to feel safe opening my eyes again
#I WANT TO LIKE IT BUT I AM.#SO SCAWED.#but mav how can you be scared of x its so outlandish/obviously real#i had a persistent problem for multiple years where i was convinced if i thought about the number 3 too hard 3 evil sisters from mythology#would materialize one by one in my room and slowly kill me by sucking out my life force#i was convinced this was true. if i happened to have 3 of something i would go out of my way to destroy one or buy another one.#look at me. look at me. i believed this even when i KNEW i was being insane and irrational and knowing it would not happen#did not scare me ANY LESS. OKAY. LOOK AT ME. I THOUGHT AS A CHILD THAT A SMALL WHITE ALIEN IN THE SHAPE OF AN OWL WOULD COME AND ???#I DONT KNOW? STAND OVER ME MENACINGLY? BUT THE THOUGHT OF IT SCARED ME SO MUCH I WOULD CRY IF I SAW A WHITE T SHIRT ON THE FLOOR AT NIGHT#NOTHING RATIONAL UP THERE!!!!!!!!! THINKING AND SEEING THE WORD USED BY WHITE PEOPLENTO MEAN DEER MONSTER THAT ISNT THAT BUT#THEYRE RACIST ABOUT IT WHEN ASK3D NOT TO? I STILL GET FULL BODY CHILLS AND FEAR SWEATS. IF I THINK TOO HARD AHOUT IT.#any way as i was saying i am a level of weenie about horror that is unbelievable and funny to a degree because ill day all this and then go#jack it to guro. .... sorry you know thay abt me now.#anf then other times seeing unrealistic cartoony violence upsets me so deeply i start crying in sympathetic pain. it doesnt make SENSE
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Can people be clear abt what they want. Bcuz. i will fucking provide whatever for you i just need to know WHAT THAT IS.!!! just tell me if u want a fucking response or not when u vent Please -w-
#I LOVE MY FRIENDS I LOVE MY FRIENDS IM SRY FOR VENTING ABT THEM AGAIN. I JUST DONT WANT TO#MAKE THEM UNCOMFORTABLE. ANF I DONT KNOW HOW TO GAUGE REACTIONS THAT ARENT COMPLETELY CLEAR#THEREFORE. VERY FRUSTRATING. JUST TELL ME#diary#or like not Tell Me bt SAY IT. clearly god#or like i dont care abt Hinting at wanting a response or somethign i just need. SOMEOTHING. to go off of so i can help u#i dont know what idm means. r u being polite & dont like it Or are u being tactful abt wanting a response#i will kill you. indicate something.#CLEARER !!
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I wonder if dogs ever get sick of begging for table scraps.
#self h@rm#self mutalition#self destruction#self destructive behavior#i wanted to post this to my main but the person this is about follows me there and i don't want to hurt them#yeah I'll be your dog. I'll do everything you ask. build my entire life around you. lose all my sense of self for you. change my plan for#college for you. I'll do everything you ask i just want to be fucking cared about. i jsut want to come first sometimes#before the sailor boys you don't even like. before sailing. before tech. not even all the time i just want to know that i can ask you to#sacrifice for me. I don't want you to but i want to know that you would. i want to know that you love me enough to give up something#i have given up so much for you. please. anything. please. please. please. im tired of begging for scraps of your time#I'm tired of begging and begging anf feeling bad when you finally relent and let me be around. i want you to fucking sacrifice SOMETHING for#me. what did you say about wanting me to choose you on my own? yeah. i want that. please. please just give me that. i want to marry you#someday anf I'll keep waiting for you like a dog but I'm only a man#I dont know how long I'll wait for this to get better.
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Im so tired of Nothingburger music!!!
#i say as a Beatles fan#bc The Beatles DEFINITELY have some Nothingburger songs#KISS has some Nothingburger songs too#like#my music taste is not definitive. it isnt the most correct#i just want some fucking variety on the fucking radio#THERES MORE POPULAR MUSIC!!! THERE'S MORE THAN 3 SONGS#most giant corporations HAVE THE LICENSING TO PLAY WHATEVER THE FUCK THEY WANT#There are THOUSANDS of chart toppers!! PLAY THEM#Everlong. Smells like teen spirit. Micheal Jackson? Single Ladies? I DONT FUCKING KNOW#and one more thing#dont trust modern country music#that shit is straight up Republican Propaganda... Im not fucking kidding#like... You dont even need a strong grasp on media literacy to understand the blatant messaging in 2020s country music#its really fucking weird ngl#theres a difference between down home values and booze from the early naughts and whatever tf is going on now#morgan wallen..... Big red flags from that guy... makes me feel sick#also#side note#Benson Boone needs to give up on his dreams.... Im 70% sure I've heard two different songs from the guy#but they both sound the same. no music difference. no vocal difference. just random crying like a bitch. go back to your day job babe#sad and sentimental lyrics does not an emotion make... like... bruh... Rap has more emotion than Boone's bitchass sqwaking#except rap is deep and meaningful so that comparison isnt fair#music isn't supposed to be boring... Music was always about communicating something somehow#but modern music has it all confused and screwed up and twisted in the pursuit of money#idk#i hate Benson Boone anf Morgan Wallen and if I ever meet them I'll consider breaking their fingers
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